#EDIT: REALISED I NEVER PUT THE LINK TO THE DAMN PLAYLISTTTT LAKSDJFLSDKJFSLDJFLSDJFLS IM SO DUMB

[nonbinaryparrish]

this is a love story - a playlist for @charactershoesfic fic ‘seek ye the living’

listen to the playlist here read the fic here image credit: thisherelight

tracklist + explanations under the cut :)

nonbeliever - lucy dacus

“you threw your books into the river / told your mama you’re a nonbeliever / she said she wasn’t surprised / but that doesn’t make it ok”

this song has always struck me as being a combination of being about adam parrish, and of being adam parrish addressing other characters. plus, the obligatory ‘artist raised christian from virginia writes song about christianity’ song that had to make it into a playlist for a fic about repressed gay virginian (sorta) christians.

nothing fades like the light - orville peck

“some say i should learn to cry / but i only ever learned how to fight / and i know everything must die / but nothing fades like the light”

we all know how fleabag s2 ended, right? everything good comes to an end. also, gay cowboys. also also, vibes for both adam and ronan tbh.

brakelights - omar apollo

“days by, baby i don’t got no brakelights / my car turns off when i go fast / why would you want me?”

an anthem for repressed, self loathing gays who haven’t yet gone on beautiful journeys of embracing their sexuality + discovering self worth.

smoke signals - phoebe bridgers

“one of your eyes is / always half shut / something happened when you were a kid / i didn’t know you then / and i’ll never understand / why it feels like i did / “how soon is now?” in an ‘80s sedan / you slept inside of it because your dad / lived in a campground in the back of a van / you said that song will creep you out until you’re dead”

in my opinion, this is the ultimate pynch song, particularly this verse. the idea of actively searching for your lover is also a very pynch idea, to me. plus, the atmosphere of the song is so fitting of both the fic and trc as a whole.

blue eyes - elton john

“blue eyes laughing in the sun / laughing in the rain / baby’s got blue eyes / and i am home, and i am home again”

a pynch love song :^). but also a lil sad !

weird around you - eerie summers

“i feel so weird around you / i've never really been in love /  i keep my words and my problems / i'd rather keep it bottled up”

making things hard for yourself, aka chapter 7 of ‘seek ye the living’. 

mirrored heart - fka twigs

“but i’m never gonna give up / though i’m probably gonna think about you all the time”

“i love you” “it’ll pass” (”i love you, too”).

because of the shame - against me!

“i watched your mother bury you today with tears in her eyes / it wasn’t her words that shook me, but the resemblance you share”

very specifically about ronan + noah, friends who got high in a church graveyard together. also about that scene in the raven boys where they watch the czernys finally get to bury their son’s body.

softly and tenderly - johnny cash

“earnestly, tenderly, jesus is calling / calling, oh, sinner come home.”

adam drives ronan home in his hondayota down a narrow virginian country lane at night. they can see bugs zipping past in the dim headlights, and johnny cash’ ‘softly and tenderly’ is playing on the radio. as adam focuses on the road, ronan stares at him from the passenger seat; the longer he stares, the more crackly and distorted the sound of the radio becomes, until he can barely make out the words anymore. suddenly, adam slams the brakes and makes a rather blasphemous comment for a seminarian. ronan stares out the windshield - a fox stares back at the headlights, its eyes glowing. the radio returns to normal.