#Duke had ‘Everything is Awesome’ stuck in his head the whole ride home

[rite-the-wrongs]

So there probably aren’t DC Superhero movies in the DC universe, right? Like there would just be a ton of legal issues or they would remind people of that tragic event where half of a major city died, right?

Well I propose that there is a single franchise that features the DC superheroes in their universe. And that would be the Lego movies. It starts with some executive featuring them to show how big the threat is when Superman gets taken out with chewing gum. Then it morphs into Batman being the edgy-lancer-ex-boyfriend to Emmet and Wyldstyle.

Of course when Bruce Wayne hears about this, he decided to have a field day. It’s a close decision, but between Bruce and Will Arnett, Bruce wins the role of Batman in the movie.

It is a struggle, but he manages to hide it from most of his kids, only Tim and Barbara finding out and immediately deciding to help with this train wreck. The real struggle is convincing his kids to go to the red carpet premiere with him.

The second Batman is on the screen, his kids all turn to him. The looks on their faces range from horror to overwhelming joy to completely done with his shit.

[amuelle]

Hello 2020…

I don’t believe in love at first sight…I do however believe in love at first click.

First click: the moment you realise that you just enjoy being around someone, you don’t need anything else other than their presence to be happy.

23:00 I caught myself mesmerised. The world was absolutely still as if it was the witching hour. Looking out over a packed dance floor in a dimly lit night club I knew I was in trouble. He was drunk dancing with this big goofy smile on his face. Everything that had mattered before this moment didn’t matter anymore. All my deal breakers, insecurities and doubts had vanished. I had stopped thinking rationally days ago. Rules didn’t exist anymore. All I knew was I was here and it didn’t matter how I got there. The walls had crumbled and I couldn’t remember the last time I had any sense. I knew this feeling. I had felt it once before. It scared me and I wanted to contain myself but I couldn’t. I was caught up and it was incredible.

It had been four days since I felt the sense slowly leave my body. He had forced me to take his number and I had no intention to use it but something told me to. He love bombed me day and night. Video calls, check in texts, random calls two minutes apart and we always played you hang up first. I thought it was all in my head. Till the night he was on my stoep and said he wanted to be with me then asked me what I wanted and I rolled my eyes and responded “You”.

The first time we met I had been offish and bruised his ego before I caved because he was persistent. He asked me where I lived and like the idiot I was clearly becoming I told him. He called to say he was coming but got lost and I had to fetch him. There, wearing daisy dukes on what felt like the hottest day of the summer, sweating through my t-shirt. I went to find a man at the Pot Shack on the corner. He was on the phone when I found him and my whole body froze when I saw him.  I had forgotten how tall he was. He got off the phone, apologised for not bringing me any chocolate but hoped that the bottle of wine he brought would suffice. He grabbed my little hand and from the pit of my stomach came the stupid butterflies. That was the last moment when I had sense.

I had over thought it six ways from Sunday and today was Tuesday. I was heading to Afro Punk with my girlfriends. He had sat in my living room as I showered, ironed my dress and put on my makeup. He had been pleasant and got along with every visitor who passed through my apartment that day. The time came for us to leave and head to the first stop on route to the concert. There he would meet more friends and cuddle up with me on the couch and express repeatedly that I should have tried to convince him harder that he should get tickets for tonight.  The thought to change my plans for the night crossed my mind. I didn’t budge. If he was worth it, really worth it then I could live my life unapologetically and he would be right there if here is where he wanted to be.

The time came for us to part ways, he had already confessed that the reason he hadn’t left and endured the torture of 5 women getting ready to go out was because there was nowhere he would have rather been. He just wanted to be with me and it was a ploy to spend time with me. He offered to pick me up when I was done but since my original plan hadn’t included him I wasn’t going to change it or potentially ruin a fantastic experience. After a lengthy, drawn out good bye we parted ways. Perhaps we would see each other again or this was the last day we had been given to enjoy each other’s company. Either way it had been life changing.

Afro Punk was incredible. The outfits, the vibe, the food everything about it was what I had needed to usher in the New Year. As 2020 approached I took my phone and started deleting all the unimportant people in it. Granted Masego was on stage and I should have been watching him mix a brand new song on stage. At that moment however shedding the dead weight meant more. 2020 was going to catch me on a clean slate with no secrets and half interested people in my phone. Someone had reminded me of something I had lost faith in and I was running with it.

31/12/2019, 23:55 Chocolate Daddy: Happy New Year Babes

31/12/2019, 23:58 Chocolate Daddy: Its 2mins left

31/12/2019, 23:59 Me: Happy New Year handsome. Lets do great things in 2020

01/01/2020, 00:11 Chocolate Daddy: Maphorisa playing now

01/01/2020, 00:11 Me: Kenzhero this side

01/01/2020, 00:37 Chocolate Daddy: Keo hopotse hle Mme

01/01/2020, 00:37 Chocolate Daddy: Blind

01/01/2020, 00:38 Me: Im so glad you said it first. I didn’t want to crack first.

01/01/2020, 00:39 Chocolate Daddy: I want to see you.

We ended the chat shortly after because Solange took the stage. I can’t describe it. It’s an audio visual experience worth the ticket price, people stepping on your shoes and trying to walk past you when they can tell there is no space. It was just worth it. After that life changing Solange moment, having learnt from the night before we stuck around, trying to get an uber at that time was going to be a mission. He kept asking if we wanted to be picked up but the party was too good. So we kept calling, texting and it felt like I was with him where he was and he was with him where I was. Even though we were on opposite sides of town. After riding around in an uber van feeling unsafe, we made it to the after party. Who goes home at 2am on New Year’s Day? My feet hurt when I left constitutional hill but because God is good all the time and cranberry red bull is delicious. I found myself dancing alone. My phone hadn’t died because Chocolate Daddy had blessed me with a power bank.

01/01/2020, 05:03 Incoming Video Call – Chocolate Daddy

I was in the clurrb and so was he. I couldn’t fathom why he was calling but I knew I would regret not answering. So I answered. He knew I couldn’t hear him and he couldn’t hear me. He had called just to blow me kisses and look at me as he sat at the bar where he was. Have you ever seen how foolish someone looks on a video call in the club? Pure ridiculousness! That dose of affection was exactly what I needed. There is was. First Click….

Eventually….we called it a night

I haven’t made it home at 6am in a long time. My house guest, The Diplomat sat up with me and we talked about everything and nothing till 8am when we both passed out on the sofa. What a fucking fantastic way to usher in the New Year.

The Diplomat headed home later that day. I was sad to see her leave because she is an awesome spirit. Everything about her vibe is a vibe, a mood and a way of life. She is adventurous and thoughtful. Loving and cautious, basically what yin and yang really are. Around lunch time as I cleaned up my place and started cooking Chocolate Daddy woke up and tried to make plans with me and I explained to him I had plans. He told me he had met my friends and they didn’t hate him so, whatever I was doing he was doing it with me. That’s the night I caught myself mesmerized. I stopped watching him dance with his goofy smile and joined. They had turned the house lights on in the club but the night/morning had felt so perfect that the concept of it ending did not agree with me. In the corner huddled up as he was feeding me frozen strawberries Goldlink (one of my favorite rappers) was standing less than 5 meters away from me and I didn’t even want a picture. I was soaking up every bit of this moment.

So what happened next???…

Since those days, there hasn’t been a day that has passed where we haven’t spoken and I love it. He’s told him about his past heartbreaks, future desires and current struggles. Me, being the open book that I am I have kept the same energy. He doesn’t sweat me, I know he will hit me back when I shoot him a text. It won’t be days, kapo tunte tsa mapantsula. I’m lucky enough to have met someone where I was. Another almost old person who just wants to have fun and share a few pages of life. It’s great! It’s what it should be! He will make weekend plans for us and pitch with bottles of wine. I’m not worried about what could be because I am so caught up in what is.

This feels super different. I’m listening to love songs I couldn’t stomach six months ago. Smiling and engaging in small talk with co-workers. I wanna lose 5kg, step my wardrobe up, learn a dead language while wearing matching underwear with my hair and nails did. I wanna drunk dance, be fed frozen fruits and make out in public. Good God I’m ready to do things I haven’t been doing. I can admit that I’m high on affection. But if you aren’t with someone who makes you feel like you can take over the world, then is it worth it? I’ve been chasing this high for the better part of twelve years and it’s better than I imagined. It was absolutely worth the wait. Everything about it is RIGHT! I am the woman ready to receive. I have the ability to communicate my deepest desires, willing to compromise but unwilling to settle. I’m at my emotional best. I’d love to give him all the credit but a woman has been taking care of herself. The good vibes I’d been parting with are home to roost and it feels better than someone unexpectedly giving you a large sum of money. The universe confirmed in the last days of 2019 and the beginning of 2020, that I’m going to be better than good.

Who knows, anything can happen between Chocolate Daddy and I. I’m hoping for the best and leaving no room for disappointment. I’m not saying I’ll stay and suffer but I’m pretty sure whatever happens it will make for interesting pages in my book.

People will lie and make it seem as if the crazy shit you want you don’t deserve. Don’t let them fool you, you know what you deserve and I know through and through that if the person next to you won’t give it to you, they are blocking the view of someone who will be more than willing to give it to. Remember who tf you are!

Happy 2020!

Get to the nasty business of living, the occasional spanking won’t hurt!!!!

Bisou…bisou