#Don't usually make posts like this but been interacting with more people ooc lately so my anxiety is like !!!!!!!

[amischiefofmuses]

I just want to say, apologies if I ever come across as intense or awkward. I'm autistic and sometimes I worry that my tone is bad in messages or that I could mis-speak and accidentally upset someone. If ever I do, please do call me up on it (nicely??) - just like 'hey, that kinda bothered me' and I'll be happy to talk it through. I promise I don't bite and upsetting people legitimately goes against everything I am as a person, so I'd rather be sure people feel they can pull me up on times I'm not my best.

[starsallalight]

So, I don't normally have my ooc posts here open to reblogs, but I'm gonna make an exception on this one because I think it's important. This is just a psa/head's up to everyone out there.

First and foremost, I'm not gonna name names. I do know of 2 aliases/muse names involved, but I'm not doing a callout so I'm gonna keep them private. I don't want people to be harassed or anything. I'm just making sure people are aware it's happening, while also giving a chance for those who have done this to stop; as I'm aware they may be new to rp and don't understand how things work fully yet. But on the other hand, I'm also aware that they might not have the newbie excuse to lean on. Regardless, I believe in allowing someone to correct their behavior first, and if it doesn't change, then that's another story.

That being said, it seems like lately there's people going around to others they haven't interacted with before, demanding that the people they're messaging make ocs for them. Not asking or suggesting. Demanding. I've been told that some are trying to dictate the fc and backstory of the muse they want made by the person they're approaching.

I've also been made aware of instances where people just don't respect backstories that are already in place. Like they demand that muses have no interest in their canon ships. Others are trying to have other parts of backstories erased.

The people that have told me about this did not ask for any of this. They didn't express any interest in doing affiliated ocs or ships. They didn't ask for, or offer to do, aus in which the canon ship isn't relevant. And they certainly didn't ask to have their muse dictated to them or changed without their consent. They've said no politely, and have either been approached again at a later time, or have been pestered about it.

Now, as someone who loves ships and affiliated ocs and is usually down to at least try them, this really bothers me. If an affiliated oc pairing is something you're interested in, you ASK. And it's more likely to be a tentative yes if you build a friendship with the other person first. Most people have rules against forced shipping. People are also busy and have things going on away from the computer screen that would make taking on more muses difficult or flat out impossible for them. Especially in the case of ocs, who take considerably more work to build and bring to life than a lot of canon muses; who can also be very hard to maintain or find the voice for. Pushing the matter will only ever get you a no, and a block. Respect others the way you want to be respected.

Be polite and approach others with compassion and understanding. And most importantly, if the answer is no, take the rejection. Don't continue to try and force what you want to happen. Just because you were told no doesn't necessarily mean that they don't want to write with you at all. It just means they're not interested in that specific thing. But if you're pulling demanding nonsense like this, they won't want to interact with you period.

Stay safe out there and treat people respectfully.

[redjaybird]

JAY’S RP PLOTTING CHEAT-SHEET

Want new-and-exciting plots for your character? Long to reach out to more of your followers, but don’t know where to start? Fear not! Fill out this form and give your RP partners both present and future all the of juicy jumping off points they need to help you get your characters acquainted.Be sure to tag the players whose characters YOU want more cues to interact with, and repost, don’t reblog! Feel free to add or remove sections as you see fit. Template here.

Mun name(s): Yams Mun pronouns: She/her/they/them, but also don't mind whatever OOC Contact: DMs or D.isco (mutuals/people I vibe with only ask for my d.isco)

Who the heck are my muses anyway:

He's a little shit that causes problems and pisses people off for the heck of it. A bit of an edgelord (is that an understatement?), rude, vulgar, and extremely tough to crack if you want him in friendlier stages. Good luck. He's not going to make it easy for you.

Points of interest:

He has various verses, some things may change depending on what verse things are in. Details in his design are important and have stories behind them. In his main verses, he has extra strengthened abilities and a little extra chaotic surprise, sometimes. He has a lot of anger issues and is really shit at dealing with other emotions, often turning them into anger, too, because he doesn't know how else to handle things. He likes to think of himself as a villain, but really he's more like an anti-hero. And he's got a whole revenge case he's trying to deal out. He's got some emotional issues that he refuses to talk about, and others he will just spill because he likes to talk about himself. And he's got trust issues.

What they’ve been up to recently:

Well, this varies for people and verses. Things won't be following the same paths for everyone he interacts with. In in his main f.c5 verse, he somehow got himself in a position where he's gotta help protect the Seeds, because of the relationship he ended up in with Jacob. Everything in the B.L verses kinda got put on hold, but these days its after his Arena fell. A vampire verse, in the f.c5 land, has been distressing him. Bloody City (original) verse is getting more developments lately (yeehaw). Depends on what version you wanna deal with, really.

Where to find them:

In general modern times, usually Chicago. In the borderlands, usually Pandora. In F.C3, on Rook Islands, hanging with the pirates. In F.C5, Hope County, usually in Jacob's region. Frontier, the pirate is in Montreal in the company of Mr. Grant and Mr. Pond.

Current plans:

Plans? What are plans? We'll have to see what unfolds. Anything could happen.

Desired interactions:

Enemies to awkward found family member, enemies/rivals, slow burns of any kind of relationship (because its almost always a slow burn with him), helping him learn to cook maybe? (his whole fear of stoves and fire issue man), dad bird dad bird dad bird dad bird (has an accidentally adopted daughter in some verses btw), etc.

Offered interactions:

Uh, do you like problematic little shits? Do you like conflict? Stories are boring without conflict, after all. And it makes the good times so much more worth it, you know? If you for some reason want him to work with you, however, the price is gonna be a little different. Because he doesn't care about money.

Current open post/s:

Keep an eye out for random IC posts, they happen a lot, and are generally open to anyone if they don't have a tag. (I don't always tag ic posts but I do always tag any trigger warnings when I think they need it.) Some will have specific verse tags, sometimes, just so you know where things will be focused on but yeah, generally most things are open unless someone specifically gets @'d on.

Anything else?:

[I'm not super great at writing, and am especially bad at describing things in words, but Jay will make up for a lot in dialogue because he loves talking. Interactions can inspire art, lots of drawing going on here. Also things never stop developing. I've been running this character for 12+ years now and I'm still developing him.]

Tagging: whoev's wants to do this thing go for it, i tried

[ectogeo-rebubbles]

for the 'bored fanfic writer' ask game

25, 27, 29

Thanks for sending these questions! :) (Link to the ask game)

29) Share a bit from a fic you’ll never post OR from a scene that was cut from an already posted fic.

Found this paragraph floating in isolation at the bottom of the doc for a random Sloanshir idea that never really got going. But this random paragraph definitely slaps:

He rolled over and stared at the armchair by the porthole. Empty, but for the pall cast on it by a memory. It was funny how many years of pleasant memories—how many books from Garak he’d read while curled up there, how many lovers in his lap—had been overshadowed by a single interaction. But getting rid of the chair, or even moving it elsewhere, would have meant giving Sloan the power to destroy any part of his life simply by touching it.

25) Have you ever upset yourself with your own writing?

Haha yeah... T_T Usually I'm fine if I know the fic is gonna work out okay (or if I can at least picture a happier potential post-fic future), but if I know that the ending of the fic or projected future is also a big bummer then I run a very high risk of upsetting myself so much that I don't finish the fic lollll.

So, I don't actually upset myself at all while writing horrible creepy sloanshir hurt/no comfort or whatever, because even if the comfort's not in the scope of the fic, I so strongly believe in Garashir ending up together in any given scenario that I just extrapolate in my mind that it'll be fine eventually. XD

The only real problem comes in when I attempt to write Garashir bad endings (for the ship or for either person involved). Like... I REALLY wanted to finish writing my wip about the events of "The Quickening" making Julian slowly go full mad scientist once he's back on the station, but writing it made me too sad because it was important to the concept that it needed to have a devastatingly tragic ending. T_T

27) Is there a fic you were nervous to post/share? Why?

Literally every single fic I've ever written. XD But that's not a helpful answer lol.

I always feel extra nervous posting rarepair fics. With Garashir, there are TONS of canon interactions to model their behavior after, and I've also read soooo much fic about them, which means I have a very good understanding of their dynamic at various points in the timeline of canon, and I know what characterization choices work for me and what doesn't. With Siskarak, there are not that many eps that show the two of them interacting so there's more extrapolation involved in figuring out their dynamic and how to translate that into a sexual relationship, and in terms of fic I have written a solid chunk of what's even out there so I usually put tons of pressure on myself to make sure it's good. And not only good, but like, meshes well with canon and actually follows from what we know about the characters, because I want people to understand how I got from point A to point B.

In addition to that, the longer the fic (or the longer I've spent on the fic), the more nervous I feel when I post. More words, more potential to write something unclear or OOC. XD More time spent, more critical I am of it by the time I post it, because I feel like it should be better than it is given the amount of effort spent. In all honesty drabbles (100 word fics) or other very short ficlets (anything <1000 words) don't make me all that nervous to post anymore, purely due to the time spent writing being so low, which is why I've been posting so many short fics lately lmaooo. If I can bang something out all at once and post without thinking, that's ideal, because then I agonize over it waaaay less beforehand and I don't feel bad if it doesn't get many readers. XD

Posting explicit fics also always makes me a lil nervous, due to the potential embarrassment of what if I've gotten something so wrong that it takes the reader out of the steaminess of the moment.

All that said, my "Second Skin" Siskarak fic, you're a criminal as long as you're mine, recently made me very nervous to post, because it's rarepair smut and it's the second longest thing I've written all year, haha. (Everyone PLEASE go tell me I did a good job, I worked so hard on it.)

[trans-harrington]

an intro post!!

what's up! i'm zee, i'm 23, and i largely use they/them pronouns, though she/her is occasionally acceptable. i've been roleplaying for about 6 years, and i'm unfortunately obsessed with stranger things, hence the blog! i'm always on the lookout for new partners, so don't hesitate to send a message if you're interested in plotting!

i'm a pretty chill person when it comes to writing, but i do have a few rules and guidelines. please read everything before messaging me!

general.

first and foremost, i only write with people 20 or older. please do not contact me if you're under the age of 20, or i will block you.

secondly, i am a black, queer person, and i write a lot of queer characters. if you don't like that, don't interact.

i want to reiterate that i write on discord only. my tumblr blog is just to find people and talk a little before moving over there. i'm a multi-para writer, and i average about 6-8 paragraphs, but i can write less if you're more comfortable with that. that being said, i cannot do one-liners. i like to keep a plot moving and i feel like with one-liners, it just drags out. i will lose interest and the plot will be dropped.

i write in mini servers on discord, and i usually make a couple of channels for us to chat and share things ooc, and different channels for each roleplay. i write in third person, past or present tense, and i have tried in the past but i cannot get into first or second person, so please don't ask me to write in either.

lastly, while i use some bots, i prefer not using tupperbox. it confuses me and more often than not i forget to actually use it when replying.

activity.

i work a full-time job, i'm preparing for a year-long certification course, and i'm mentally ill, so my activity can be spotty. there may be times that i just want to chat without writing, and there may be periods where you get tons and tons of replies from me. please be patient with me either way. you can always poke me gently if it's been a few days and you haven't heard from me, but daily messages, or multiple messages a day make me extremely anxious. i'm less likely to answer you, and it will probably end in a ghosting situation, which is the last thing i want. if you're the kind of person who needs rapid responses every day, we aren't going to vibe.

plotting.

first and foremost, be aware that i require doubling. i have a lot of ideas and ships, and i know plenty of other people do as well. i want us both to be able to get what we want out of writing together. i will always put as much enthusiasm into your plot as i do mine, and i ask that you do the same. if i feel like you're neglecting one plot in favor of the other, i will probably end both.

nsfw and other themes.

i am an adult, and i enjoy writing smut and heavy topics. sometimes, my plots can be very smutty, and other times smut might not appear at all. please let me know what you are and aren't comfortable with upfront so that we can avoid any tricky situations!

i enjoy writing angst, fluff, aus (especially historical aus), omegaverse, pregnancy and family-building, and canon-compliant plots. i love brainstorming and worldbuilding, filling in the many gaps that the duffer brothers have left us with.

i have very few triggers, but i will not write out the following: self-harm, toxic or abusive relationships, homophobia or queerphobia of any kind, racism, heavy descriptions of gore, eye trauma, or animal abuse.

for smut purposes, i absolutely cannot write anal penetrative sex. i had a nightmarish experience both online and in person that i won't go into details about, but anal smut is highly triggering for me. if you bring it into a plot, i will block you immediately. that being said, other limits include: pedophilia, raceplay, feeding/food, feet, detransitioning, and noncon.

characters/ships.

i will delete this part later, but for right now i am not looking for any steddie content. i enjoy the ship, but i have been overwhelmed with it lately and would just like to take a break from it altogether for the time being.

my main muse is steve harrington, who i write as a trans man. he's my favorite character to write as, and is the one i have the most headcanons and backstory for. but i am duplicate-friendly, and welcome other steves to interact!

additionally, i do write as a few members of the party, but i write them all aged up. the only time i will write them as kids are if they're appearing in other plots as background characters.

and lastly, i am open to all kinds of ships, but there are a few things to keep in mind. firstly, i am open to canon/oc ships but only if you have a detailed character sheet for them, so that i can actually get a feel for them. secondly, i do not enjoy ronance or stonathan as romantic ships, but i am always happy to write them platonically (in fact i have a platonic stonathan plot that i am DESPERATE to write so hmu).

characters i write:

- steve harrington (ftm)

- robin buckley (nonbinary)

- max mayfield (ftm)

- nancy wheeler (cis or mtf)

- joyce byers

- jim hopper (cis or ftm)

- dustin henderson

- eleven hopper

- vickie (begging for a last name reveal)

- chrissy cunningham

- carol perkins

as far characters i want to write against - bring me anyone! i love exploring different dynamics between characters, especially ones that don't get to interact much (if at all) in the show. i'm always looking for romantic, platonic, or familial ships, and i'm always looking to plot, so don't hesitate to reach out and send a message!

[stardusted-hearts]

[ooc]

Hey guys sorry my activity has been non-existent lately, but I wanted to put out a few important reminders for this account/AU.

I know this is kind of long but please read it, it's important to me.

Anything that happens in any discord server is Not Canon to this tumblr, unless stated otherwise. I like to keep these things separated both for the sake of not getting confused, and being able to easily look back on character interactions here via tags/posts/etc. This also allows me to loosen up and be a little more silly in discord servers than I would be here outside of crack.

---

Shadow [Horizon] as I have stated before, does not yet have his nickname In Character. The best he might be able to give another character is to say they can call him Dragon if they ask for a nickname. "Horizon" is a very special name that is going to be given to him by Sonic at some point, but it hasn't happened yet.

---

Sonic [Stardust] so far only has the nickname "Star," given to him by Volt. Other characters that are close to him will have heard this and can use it, otherwise characters need to ask him about it. "Stardust" will be his full nickname eventually, but it again has not happened yet.

---

I am not kidding when I say I NEED continuity. That means continuity here, on tumblr, unless otherwise discussed. If you want to RP with me via discord and have it be canon here, I am so down for that! We just need to talk about it first, please!

---

I am also very down to talk about pre-established relationships, which can include knowing one of my muses' nicknames. I view first time interactions between characters as very important, no matter how awkward it might be, or how difficult it might be to write. If stuff gets brushed off or goes unacknowledged I am going to be lost and lose motivation to RP, so at the very least we need to talk things through if you don't want to do a full intro-thread like that.

---

I feel like these posts I make keep getting ignored or people just don't care about what I'm saying. Forgetting is fine, I forget stuff all the time, trust me. But this stuff is important to me, and if you can't give me continuity for whatever reason, be it that it's not your RP style, or whatever, that's totally okay but we are likely not going to be very compatable as RP partners outside of maybe server-based stuff or random crack.

I don't spend time putting a bunch of effort into writing a meaningful starter or reply only for it to be tossed aside like it meant nothing toward relationship development. This isn't about matching my length, I don't expect anyone to do that.

I don't want to end up not RPing here for MONTHS again because something turned me off. [ It's a problem, and not something I'm blaming anyone else for, it's me. IDK if it's the neurodivergency or what, but I do have some avoidant behavior that can be kind of easy to trigger at times. That's why I make these posts. ]

Again, if this stuff doesn't vibe with you I totally get it and it's okay, I'm not mad or upset and it's not like I'd dislike someone for it. We all have our different styles, wants, and different things we find fun in RP.

For me, I want and need continuity. The "tumblr timeline" here matters to me, this is how I enjoy RP.

So please keep that in mind if you do still want to interact with me. Keep in mind whether or not our characters really know each other, and how much they have or haven't interacted.

I hope I don't sound like an asshole and this got long as usual but I've been stressing hardcore about this for a few weeks and it's one of the reasons I haven't been around [mostly been irl stress though].

Love y'all <3

[kellachfromthewoods]

LFRP: Kellach Woods

(turns out I never did one of these)

Character Name: Kellach Woods

The Basics ––– –

Age: Perpetually in a state of being mid 20s

Birthday: 12th Sun of the 3rd Astral Moon (May 12th)

Race: Midlander Hyur. Often confused for a Highlander hyur.

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Pansexual, even if it doesn't look it.

Marital Status: Married to one Eamont Desormeaux

Alignment: Oscillates between Chaotic Good and True Neutral, depending on the needs of his found family.

Elemental Affinity: Umbral Earth

What I’m Looking For ––– –

Adventure, IC dungeons or just exploring ruins in the open world! There's plenty out there!

Fellow Blue Mages who aren't all about the theatrics of the Celestrium

Chocobo handlers

People who just have weird stuff happen to them (to commisserate)

Dressing up for no reason at all

What I’m Not Looking For ––– –

Shit heads

IC villains. It's more a realistic outcome issue where both parties would finish the other off early in the story since Kellach does not fuck around and likely neither does your villain.

Isekai'd characters from realms unrelated to FFXIV - I'm only putting this here because it's happened a few times and well, nobody was having fun. Even assuming I liked the premise (I don't), I probably do not know whatever realm your character came from even OOC, and probably won't be able to give you the interactions you want.

Other OOC Notes ––– –

So, hey there. I play Kell in the critically acclaimed massively multiplayer online role-playing game Final Fantasy XIV. While Kellach can sometimes be a lil sourpuss, he's very excitable when it comes to Actually Doing Things. Of course, if you just want to discuss blue magic, his, uh, unique sense of fashion, or just good ol' fightin' with weapons or not, he's also available.

Now I'm on Discord all the time practically, but personally I like to not mix things. I'll post IC stuff here but RP involving me and my characters' an inside the game thing. Planning or throwing ideas around? We can do that anywhere though!

You can keep readin' by clickin' on the thing.

Physical Appearance ––– –

Hair: Black with differently colored highlights, though lately they have been settling on blue. Typically wears his hair in the Gyr Abanian Plait style, or the side ponytail.

Eyes: Golden.

Height: 5 fulms 7.1 ilms

Build: Demonstrably muscular. Often claimed to be too thicc for a Midlander.

Distinguishing Marks: While often hidden behind a mask, a facial scar that goes from the right forehead diagonally down to the left cheek, passing by the nose.

Common Accessories: Masks, and typically partial ones that still show his face. From an ancient Allagan design to a Blue Mage's domino mask, Kellach has several of these for many occasions and outfits. Outside of those, he often carries what he has taken to call the adventurer's emergency kit, a belt pouch containing potions and several ailment erasing items just in case problems arise. He's also prone to wearing single-earrings and makeup to deepen the looks of the masks' insides and, well, make his lips look more luscious, even if he's married.

Usual Attire: It really depends - Typically, his attire will lack pants, preferring subligars and shorts to things that cover the legs. If he wears pants, they'll be particularly low-cut, as the example above. His attire typically reflects whichever weapon he's carrying - Blue when acting as a blue mage, ancient Allagan inspired gear for when he's carrying an Allagan blade, a combination shirt and subligar for when he's cruisin' for a bruisin', etc. He does have actual armor for operations, as well as other kits that can be used for other purposes, but they are often specialized and do not come out often.

Personal ––– –

Profession: ~ Ruins Explorer/Adventurer/Grave Robber: All different definitions of the same thing. Kellach stakes his savvy and combat prowess against the world's history in a search for knowledge, magical relics and just plum ol' adventure. ~ Coliseum Fighter: Under the moniker of Sabotender Ciclope, in part due to complications about him being Ul'dah and in part due to personal complications. Effectively a gatekeeper for the bloodsands with a very unorthodox style of weaponless fighting. It is, in part, a cover to listen in on possible leads for whatever his friends are investigating. ~ Bodyguard/Trade Caravan Escort: Using his martial prowess to help out Eorzea's lucrative trade routes, one bandit at a time. Has happened less and less lately due to being busy with other adventures. ~ Deputy Postmoogle: He used to be one, and perhaps one day, he will be again. All they have to do is ask, and he'll do it. If only because Kellach does owe them a lot. Despite one of their own accidentally revealing to his Free Company that he intended on sacrificing himself in a convoluted self-sacrificial plan that would have resulted in him somehow surviving. It's best to not ask.

Hobbies: Training in use of various weaponry, personal fashion, reading about ancient cultures, highly conceptual thinking (read: saying whatever stupid thought comes to mind)

Languages: Eorzean Common and a passing familiarity with Ancient Allagan

Residence: An apartment in the Ivory Tower, whereever it may be found.

Birthplace: A farm on an island south-south-west of Vylbrand formerly known as Toegisil (lit. Secret Island in Roegadyn), which had a small port for resupplying ships.

Religion: Not much of a believer, but Element worship - Fire/Air/Ice/Water/Air/Lightning

Patron Deity: If you ask him, he has none, but actually it's Althyk, as it was a chance encounter with Marauders that set him on the path he's on. Marauders are well known axemen, and Althyk's main symbol is a mythril axe.

Fears: Losing Eamont, losing his friends and found family, disappointing the above, mind control, Voidsent (a fear that manifests typically in overwhelming violence)

Nicknames: Kell. Woods, though that has fallen out of favor.

Relationships ––– -

Spouse: Eamont Desormaux. They wuv each other vewy vewy much.

Children: No adoptions yet.

Parents: Deceased

Siblings: His brother, Einrich, sole survivor of the mass suicide/self-genocide of Toegisil.

Other Relatives: All deceased

Pets: Pinchyshell - Smallshell Crab, deceased (eaten by a sea creature) Phantom - White Chocobo, released to frolick among the wild chocobos of Dravania Ser Régent de Grisville - White (fat) Chocobo, Kell is tasked to slimming him down. Three years later and a strict gyshal greens diet have done nothing to thin down the rotund bird Ringo - Red Panda, adopted by Eamont and welcomed in their little abode. It likes Eamont more than Kell. Several other animals that somehow glom up to Kell in bizarre circumstances.

Traits ––– -

* Bold your character’s answer.

Extroverted / In Between / Introverted

Disorganized / In Between / Organized

Close Minded / In Between / Open Minded

Calm / In Between / Anxious

Disagreeable / In Between / Agreeable

Cautious / In Between / Reckless

Patient / In Between /  Impatient

Outspoken / In Between / Reserved

Leader / In Between / Follower

Empathetic / In Between / Apathetic

Optimistic / In Between / Pessimistic

Traditional / In Between / Modern

Hard-working / In Between / Lazy

Cultured / In Between / Uncultured

Loyal / In Between / Disloyal

Faithful / In Between / Unfaithful

Additional information ––– –

Personality: Kellach is essentially what people would consider as weird. Whether it's his alleged aversion to pants, the ideas he comes up with (the healing gun, the cannon-on-a-stick, the emergency beaver, etc.) typically require a keen understanding of the way his mind works as they often jump out of nowhere. He's gotten used to getting that reaction, but so long as it's just an observation and not an evaluation of him as a person, he's fine with it. Other than that, he's excitable and in a funk, easily distracted with physical things to do. While he's difficult to approach due to a combination of attire and reputation, he's a fiercely loyal friend for those who manage to do so.

Recreational Substances: Kellach is particularly boring on that point, in that he will drink and even then very much in moderation. He got rip roaringly drunk at one point and suffice it to say problems occurred.

Favorite Foods: Fish on rice, meat (any) roasted over a campfire, natural berries, grilled fish, savory salads

Likes: Discoveries, problem-solving, recreational fighting, good company, blue magic

Dislikes: Nobility of blood or coin, inaction,

Virtues: Loyal, honest, sense of justice

Vices: No regards to the sanctity of life, martyr complex, dishonorable

RP Hooks ––– –

Ruins Explorer: You've got an ancient ruin that needs breaking into for archaeological or more mundane pecuniary purposes? There's a Kellach interested, salivating at the idea!

No Celestrium, No Problem: Kellach is a bonafide Blue Mage, albeit one who came to the art in an odd way. With such bizarre magics being unfamiliar in Eorzea and the world, perhaps you want to consult someone who isn't too busy preening for the Celestrium (instead preening for the sake of preening!)

The Deputy Postmoogle's Last Delivery: Kellach owes the moogles several favors, and we all know how lazy they are. He might need to put on the uniform while you make use of your FemRoe Prime membership.

Who Is This Masked Fellow?: During a particularly unpleasant time in his life, Kellach went in search of himself, and uh, accidentally created several identities that might be wanted for various activities. Maybe your character wants to figure out who they are and what happened?

Other stuff!: Kellach has a tendency to fit in anywhere due to his strange sense of morality, his ability to introduce a little bit of levity and comedy in scenes that you believe might need it while being completely serious if needed. I'm pretty adaptable.

[askjaybird-hyssop]

OOC: Hi! I just found your blog because of a friend in the MH group chat, and could I please get a sorta more detailed recap than the one you've pinned? You don't have to, but I'd like to get caught up on everything, and it seems really well crafted from what I've seen! -Blue

//ooc: Sure! Just for reference though, I’ll link the [first post] which has links under the section called “The Story/AU” for a link to some other posts with lots of information too! I linked those all because there’s so much stuff that’s been fleshed out that it’d take forever to compile it all onto one document (I’m talking over 5,000+ words total).

(EDIT: I’m not sure how long this is but I think it’s probably gotten close to this  number lol)

This is also going to be pretty long, but I’ll try keeping it as short as possible (and it’s only going to be talking about what’s happened on the blog so far.) This will include information from the first 2 chapters, so if you haven’t read those be aware that there are spoilers here!

If you want even more info about the entire series/AU and are willing to hear spoilers just DM me and I’ll try getting back to you asap!

Warning: This is extremely long. Like, extremely long

--- --- ---

So, first and foremost, let’s talk about supernatural lore and the time loop. If you want to skip down to the next part just talking about the blog, it’s after the next black line (but you’ll probably be confused if you don’t read this).

In this world there is no “one true God” that rules everything. In reality, there’s a multitude of different supernatural creatures from all religions and mythology. This means there are Angels (ex: Seraph and Cherub), Demons (ex: Succubus and Kitsune), Dragons (ex: Hydra and Bakunawa), etc.

Or, in other words, everyone’s right in their religion because they all exist.

There’s a lot of lore here that I can’t go into without risking spoilers, but the last thing I can say is that The Operator is considered a type of  wraþþe demon (aka a demon of wrath). 

So, as Jay is shot and bleeding out the story mentions how he basically begged to any god or creature listening to help protect the others affected by their situation and how he wishes he could go back and save them all. Remember when I said that there are a bunch of supernatural creatures here? Well, they were there watching as he was dying and said his wish.

And what do they do? They panic. 

Why? Because they know that he is dying and they can’t let him die. People like Jay are extremely rare to come by because of his soul.

“His mother, who was away with the other leaders, was one of the most powerful Seraphim. His father, a mere mortal. But they loved each other greatly and their son had been blessed with a bright soul and a passion to support others. Yet here he was dying, after trying to help a childhood friend who had been possessed and tormented, the light within him desperately fighting to stay alive. No, this wasn't supposed to be happening.”

This explains why they are all freaking out. Because, while there are tons of different supernatural creatures, Angels and Demons still don’t get along and are in a constant fight. Some creatures, like the Phoenix, side with the Angels. They are sometimes also referred to as the “Celestial”. Others, like the Vampires, would side with the Demons. Sometimes they are referred to as the “Terrestrial”. Some creatures didn’t take any sides and were considered “Peacekeepers” or neutral parties.

The reasoning for the different names is because most fights between the Demons and Angels occur on the mortal realm. These fights aren’t the typical bloodbaths some people like to imagine, no, they are usually dealing with the interference of human life and the mortal plane.

The Angels, and usually the ones who side with them, are called Celestials because they typically are the creatures who have a harder time interacting with humans or going to the mortal plane while being visible. Demons and the neutral parties, on the other hand, are able to interact with the mortal plane a lot easier. This is why The Operator is able to be seen and have such strong effect on everyone.

This is also the reason why Jay was, and still is, being targeted by The Operator. When he was dying, The Operator was waiting to attempt to steal his soul and destroy it, because people with these souls are typically people who can interact with or be influenced by both the mortal plane and the supernatural plane. More often then not, these people don’t know about this and are targeted by both Celestials and Terrestrials. Because the Celestials have a harder time being able to influence the mortal plane, their goal is to try and use these people to help other humans, the world around them, and humans being hunted or possessed by Terrestrials. Demons, on the other hand, want to chaos destruction and chaos. They typically target humans and use them to create these things for them. In a sense, they use these humans that are possessed or corrupted by them as a food source. Also, it pisses off the Celestials, so there’s that bonus.

Only the most powerful Celestials and moderately powerful Terrestrials can actually view and interact with the mortal plane. All Terrestrials can view the mortal plane, however only the moderately powerful Celestials and most powerful Celestials can start the viewing of the mortal plane. For Celestials, if one creature starts a viewing of the mortal plane then any others who pass by can look over and see. Only the moderately powerful and the most powerful Celestials can actually go down and be there (even though they’re not visible to others). The most powerful Celestials are the only ones who can make themselves visible to humans and are able to interact with them.

Because Demons and other Terrestrials have such easy access to the mortal plane, this usually causes moderately powerful Celestials to be sent down to the mortal world, where they are unable to actually be seen or felt, and they usually fight to protect over the person/people that the demon use.

Now, Jay’s dad was one of the few exceptions to the rule of influence. This was because when he was in his late-teens him and some friends decided to mess with some witchcraft and supernatural stuff, but he was the only one actually affected ( because he was distantly related to another person with a partial-celestial soul, so there were very small traces of it in his blood. Even then, it was an incredibly small chance that this would actually happen). He had no idea this actually happened until he met Jay’s mom in the back of an alley one night. The rest is history.

So how does The Operator play into this?

The Operator saw Jay’s soul while he was attached to Tim and wanted to destroy or corrupt it. Because Jay was really close to Alex at the time, and The Operator couldn’t directly attach himself to Jay due to his soul being partially Celestial, The Operator decided to attach himself to Alex.

His goal was to cause destruction, chaos, and to cause as much pain/suffering to Jay as possible. (Note: he is classified as a moderately powerful demon. Still extremely hard to beat, especially for humans. To put this into context, if Jay currently fought a demon considered lowly powerful, he would most likely be left completely beat up and hurt, even though he has a chance of winning. These low level demons are still extremely powerful compared to humans)

While Jay’s dad had no problem being contacted by other Celestials or Peacekeepers, both his parents agreed they didn’t want him involved in the disputes of the supernatural world. They forbade any creatures from interacting with him and told them to keep him out of anything even remotely supernatural. Sadly, because Jay’s mom is a Seraph and is considered to have a lot of power, the other Celestials were not allowed to help him in the past. Their only rule was to make sure he didn’t get involved and that he didn’t get killed by a Terrestrial. That is why they panic so much.

Another note, People with partially Celestial souls like Jay are extremely rare, and some have stronger souls than others letting them see the different planes. Those with strong enough souls can interact with the two planes, which the Celestials find to be very helpful for when they want to help protect a person but are unable to manifest in the human world. These people sometimes act as messengers and communicators between worlds, but are usually not ones to advertise their abilities. Again, those who actually can interact with both planes are even more rare than Celestial-Human souls. Those with stronger souls are also targeted a lot more, which is why Jay made it all the way till meeting Tim and the others without ever being attacked by a Terrestrial.

So, what happens now? How did he get saved? What caused the time looping?

A phoenix decided to help him and give him what’s called a “blessing”. 

Whoa, whoa, whoa, another large and important piece of lore? Yep.

Different creatures can give what is called a blessing to a person, normally it barely affects them (ex: a little bit more good luck, passion for helping others, stealth and ability to hide crimes easier, more strategic mind, etc.), but because Jay already had a special soul used to reach out through the planes to help people, this is what caused him to gain his wings with the blessing from the Phoenix.

Blessings are typically small things that just boost another trait or part of a person. Some Terrestrials use their blessings to help make more chaos and increase damage, others don’t really care. The same thing applied to most creatures. Some care about giving their blessings out to peoples, others don’t. (Another note: a person can only have one blessing at a time, and the creature that blesses them can only bless 5 people total)

Jay’s soul cannot take blessings like a normal person’s soul, because it is a mix of human and celestial. When growing up, he always had a passion for helping others more than himself, and this was the minor influence of his soul. His powers were relatively weak though, and the only thing that actually occurred around others was that he had a stronger sense and ability of empathy and helping people through different event or what they were dealing with. He could’ve strengthened his powers to get them stronger and to possibly protect himself more, but because his parents refused to tell him he had no idea his soul was any different.

When the Phoenix gave Jay his blessing, it strengthened his soul, which let him gain more of an immunity to The Operator and other demon’s abilities/effects on humans (but only after he built an immunity to it himself. Before he wasn’t able to have any immunity at all. Think of it like someone who never had an immune system finally getting one). 

Because his soul was different, it could also warp the blessing to get certain things out of it. As a result, he gained his Green Jay wings (due to both the Phoenix and his mother being winged Celestials, also a small pun on his nickname), a stronger empathetic ability (now he can pick up on other’s emotions easier, but unknown to everyone for a while, they can pick up and feel his emotions. This can be dangerous in the fact that his negative emotions can end up hurting those around him by making them feel this way too. It’s small enough to where people can tell it’s not theirs if they focus but strong enough to be able to be felt), and is now able to touch (and if he used enough strength, harm) other demons (The energy drawback is extreme, especially if not trained or strengthened and if he attempted to kill a demon it would also result in him dying too as of right now). The other aspects that he got were a result of the warping of the blessing (claws, eye changes, markings, etc.) as a means to protect himself now that more Terrestrials will be targeting him. 

When Jay finally starts strengthening his powers, he’ll be able to start helping fend off The Operator (along with other Terrestrials) and he will be trying to help protect the other members of the Marble Hornets crew from the Terrestrials too (most won’t target his friends, though, they’ll only go after him. His friends would be considered collateral damage).

So, where does the time loop come into play?

A lot of lore suggests that Phoenixes are able to rebirth themselves in a fire, and because Jay was blessed by a Phoenix he is now stuck in a time loop until he can save all his friends and himself. (Remember, this is also a result of the blessing warping because of his soul. It was to benefit him in the largest way it could, and his last wish before he died was to help save his friends)

--- --- ---

Now that we’ve gotten most the lore out of the way, let’s get onto the recap of what’s happened so far in this blog.

Jay was shot, got his powers/blessing, and woke up on March 23rd, 2006 with the Green Jay wings and an open bullet hole.

The bullet hole won’t bleed out or kill him, it’s more of an irritant than anything. It still hurts him, and will bleed non-stop (increases if his heart rate elevates). He ends up trying to clean it up and bandages it. (If his heart rate increases and he bleeds more, he has to change the bandages sooner than normal to prevent staining. He hasn’t mentioned much about the bandages on purpose, because he’s nervous and honestly terrified of the entire situation surrounding the bullet hole.)

He started this blog as a way to log any information he finds, along with having reference in case his memory was removed again. He refused to go over and create a new Twitter or YouTube account because he knew Alex had watched the previous videos, and he really didn’t want to risk Alex or any of the others seeing that.

He has both his old phone and the phone that lets him access the Tumblr. The other phone is the same as his phone he had when he was shot, but due to some timeline difficulties it has the date as May 27th, 2020 (aka the start date of the blog!). He finds out that he is unable to connect the phone to his camera/camcorder that he bought and is hesitant to risk it with anything else (they glitch and crash, any footage or pictures on the old devices will become corrupted and useless).

Because he’s back in time, that also means he had to start adjusting himself back into the routine he had before the Marble Hornets fiasco. No one remembers what happened and the only people he currently has contact to is Alex, Seth, Tim, and Brian. Alex knew him as a friend since middle school, Seth is more of an acquaintance of his known through Alex. Tim and Brian he now has contact to because of the Marble Hornets castings. He has not tried getting contact with Jessica or Amy yet.

Within the first couple days, someone sent in some code to mess with him. He then started being on guard for any sign of TTA or The Operator, even though he doesn’t think it was them.

He then goes to class after a while and another classmate sees his wings. They asked him if he was cosplaying for an even or something, and even though he had no idea what it meant he just said yea. They complimented the realistic style of them and went about their day. Jay had no idea previously that he had his wings or other physical changes.

He had felt something weird on his back, but due to being recently thrown back in time he was so focused on trying to seem ‘normal’ he didn’t realize he had the few things that literally scream “somethings not right”. That is how he finds out about his wings and other features. He has managed to hide them, but he hasn’t revealed how. He stops posting for a while even though he said he was going to send out an update post with a breakdown of what he knows (and wants the public to know)

After around 3 or 4 days, Jay finally posts again and says he woke up in Rosswood with no memory of getting there or any memory past posting that text-post. He later says he’s starting to regain the memories but they’re blurry and he can’t understand them. He also couldn’t remember clearly what happened leading up to him being shot at first, but even though he doesn’t say it that’s something that is included in the returning memories. 

He notes that when he woke up there seemed to have been a struggle, but he is still unsure what caused that. He doesn’t think it was Masky or Hoodie, but he’s still keeping a look out for them now too.

After that, he posted the pictures of his camcorder that he had tried hooking up to his phone to transfer the pictures, but it was completely black due to the resulting glitch. He then posted a couple hours later the picture of the screen working and say that he finally got it working again but was hesitant to try connecting his phone to it again.

He currently doesn’t know if he has a masked state or not (hint: he doesn’t. But that doesn’t mean Skully isn’t going to make an appearance later on!) and that resulted in him being on the look out for any suspicious masks too.

His next post is him saying he’s nervous about the auditions that are the next day, and he that he knows he can’t try asking Alex to cancel the film because it would seem even more suspicious. (Alex is already very concerned because of the days of silence and the sudden “cosplay” that someone saw him in, but hasn’t said it outright)

After someone suggested it, he decided to try convincing Alex at the end to go with Tim and Brian to Applebee’s (and he ended up getting dragged along as well). He also complains because the auditions were set to go from 11 am to 7 pm, and he really didn’t want to leave the blog alone for so long when he had also just recently lost his memory. He goes, tries posting a little bit, but then Alex got curious and he had to stop.

The same person who suggested that, though, put emphasis on Jay’Bird’, making him concerned and suspicious because he hadn’t said anything about the changes (and he still hasn’t! He’s really nervous to say it in case the others see).

Marble Hornets auditions were March 30th, 2006. That was when he finally got contact with Tim and Brian, but his behavior was noticed by Alex and he’s been asked multiple times if he’s okay. They both know he’s not, but Jay hasn’t told anything to Alex. (Can you guess what tipped Alex off? Hint: it’s something that some trauma victims experience)

Later, the person who suggested taking Alex to Applebee’s explained they thought it was some nickname irony or something, which he said he understood. He also noted he forgot how fast some of you guys were at figuring things out or making theories/cracking codes. He also goes on to explain a little more about the changes his body has but stay away from anything bird related.

Someone asked why he was being so secretive with the other changes and notes that if it can be passed off as cosplay it shouldn’t be that big of a deal. His response is basically “have you even seen some of the cosplays out there???”. He goes on to say that even though cosplay wasn’t as big back then there were still some extremely large and complex ones out there, and basically gives away that the changes are large enough to be extremely noticeable and that the smaller ones probably weren’t actually noticed by the student who asked him.

Someone also asked if he was planning on telling the others, and he said that he wasn’t going to yet. He really doesn’t want to show anyone the phone and is hoping no one sees or notices the changes in appearance/behavior.

He also explains a little bit later about the changes and there are some that can come on command but none of them can be affected by him wanting them to go away (meaning, if they showed up around the others then he can’t force them to go away. He can make them appear at his will, though!)

When someone asks if he has something like bird wings, as a joke, he just says “No comment”. 

His next text-post just says “It’s so hot out here I feel like I’m dying oh my god

This is a really bad idea

I’m making a mistake”

After that, all the code is released and that’s pretty much everything that’s happened and been revealed so far.

Also, a note: remember that you guys all can affect how the story goes! There are some plot points that will happen no matter what, but it’s determine by when, how soon, and if it’s bad or not by you guys. If you’re confused, you’ll understand what I mean later on, don’t worry ;)

[tuesdayscanons]

《 How I Run My Blog 》

Speed

《 If you take anything from this post, it's this—I either respond in ten seconds or ten years. There's a whole lotta factors: time, energy, interest, etc. Lately, I've been moving slower because my muse is all over the place and I've been burnt out by college, but the semester is about to end and I'm hoping my workload won't be as overwhelming from now on. 》

Replies

《 The length of my replies tend to vary, but I try to write multi-para responses (which can slow me down when I get carried away/overwhelmed. I'm also interested in fun little one line responses, which I'd most likely respond to quicker bc they're more casual. 》

Starters

《 I tend to post starter calls for the muses/AUs I'm the most interested in atm, though things can be delayed if my muse flops for any reason. Starters *might* be easier to write, though I have starters I owe which suggest otherwise. It also depends on what ideas I have—sometimes I have a gazillion ideas for interactions between muses and other times I get stuck bc I have no clue how to create a situation for two muses to have an excuse to interact. 》

Inbox

《 My inbox is open to anyone and to (almost) anything. You can send me random nonsense on anon for all I care, as long as it isn't overly vulgar or hostile. Don't get me wrong, you can still push my muses around (tbh I encourage it), but there's a point to where it stops being fun.

RP memes also don't expire on this blog. You can send me something from a post I reblogged over a year ago (though please specify if it's an emoji meme—there are emoji asks in purgatory bc I can't remember what meme it's from and have no clue how to respond).

The asks I'm most interested in tend to revolve around personal relationships or deep dives into my muses? Y'all can probably tell from what I usually reblog. OOC memes are also good when my muse is low, though I'd feel bad if I posted OOC too often. Y'all came for my muses, not to hear me ramble.

My speed tends to vary, though I usually find it easier to respond to ask memes than ic stuff. 》

Selectivity

《 I say that I'm semi-selective on my promos, though I'm generally open to writing with people. Most of it comes down to anxiety—I still try to reach out to people, but it makes my day when people reach out to me? Tbh, I'm constantly worried about bothering people and having people care enough to approach me is a huge deal. Sometimes I can be all over the place, but ideally, I'd like to open myself up to new partners. Depending on a handful of partners can be a huge issue down the line, especially knowing how I can be sometimes. 》

Wishlist

《 What I'm most interested in tends to shift, but I have a wishlist tag (creatively labeled "wishlist") if y'all want to check it out. Generally, I'm interested in exploring interpersonal relationships. Romance, rivalry, friendship, family, what have you. I tend to lean towards fluff or...Sour Patch Kids threads? I'm sure there's a better word out there to describe it, but basically angst/melodrama which leads to fluff. Sometimes I can do full on angst, though I don't do so as often because they're kinda a bummer. 》

Honest Notes

《 This goes for everything I've previously mentioned, but I have a tendency to hyperfixate. It could be a certain muse, a specific aspect/character dynamic, sometimes even specific mutuals as odd as that might seem. I don't intend to brush people off or play favorites, it's just that my attention and memory are both atrocious. 》

Random Side Notes

《 Related to the hyperfixation thing, there are times where I post a lot of art/headcanons to my oc blogs instead of actually writing ic stuff. I started out as an oc rper and I find it easier to write ocs (hence why Maddie has pretty much taken over this blog). Sometimes I'm able to write canon characters like I would ocs, though I don't think I could ever be more invested in a canon character than my ocs. They're my babies, y'know? I've also probably mentioned before that I don't watch a whole lot of shows because I spend most of my free time thinking about my ocs. That could have something to do with it...

Also—if y'all want to direct message me, I prefer Discord over Tumblr IMs. I'll still respond to Tumblr IMs, but Discord is better if y'all are looking to have regular/on-going OOC contact with me. Idk, it just feels more organized and personal? I check my Discord pretty much daily, so I'll probably respond quickly (if I don't forget to write back, that is...but I still don't think I'd leave you hanging for too long). 》

[rpbetter]

hello! so... i'm mutuals with this person who writes the same muse as i do. they don't roleplay with my version, because i haven't told them about my multimuse, so i don't think they even realize we write the same muse in the first place. lately, i've noticed them calling their muse "my son", and saying things like "i own him now, everyone else go home", and it hurts my feelings. but i don't know how to bring this up without sounding bitter, possessive, or competitive. can you help me?

Oh, no...

First, let me point out the irony of you being concerned about coming off as bitter, possessive, or competitive while they're saying that kind of thing as a RPer.

Because those are all, unfortunately, normalized things to say from fandom, a lot of people who write fic, do art, write a lot of meta, or just really vibe with a character say these things regularly. It can be funny there, but ultimately, it does actually express those things. It is a statement made humorously to convey bitterness about the way a character has been treated in canon, possessiveness because you're so annoyed with canon and/or fandom's treatment of a character that's important to you, and even competitiveness - your take on this character, even feelings about them or similarities to them, is better than the shit that annoys so terribly.

The difference in venue is extremely important, though. All of those things can be pretty damn valid in non-RP fandom, even when they annoy the hell out of us coming from fans we feel are the ones mucking up the character. It's ultimately that it's valid because it's a way of expressing ourselves, and our frustrations, without being nasty to the creators.

But in RP, you're talking about other RPers when you say this, too. Not just canon content creators, not just fans out in fandom who might express the same things. No, other people who are also engaged in portraying this character as their muse. That makes it hostile, no matter how much joking is wrapped around it. Especially with the prevalence of RPers being intolerant of "duplicates."

Secondly, I'd like to assure you that you're not being any of those things! Furthermore, that it's incredibly valid to feel hurt by this. If it was a random RPer you ran across, it might be a non-issue or an eye roll, but when it comes from someone you interact with, it's hurtful. In a way, especially when they do not know you write that muse. If they knew, would they simply feel this way without expressing it? Would they continue to express it? Is their point the usual, normalized behavior and reasons for it, or do they actually have a case of "duplicate anxiety?"

(Which, for the record, I hate both the word "duplicates" and the phrase "duplicate anxiety." No one's muse is a duplicate, they're the same canon character with different portrayals. They're variations on a common theme, not identical sets. I think where actual anxiety over portrayals of the same canon character exists, this sort of thinking helps that along. But my experience with "duplicate anxiety" is hostility, and not just anxiety-born hostility as a defense either. In most cases I've seen and directly experienced with my own canon muses any of the following would be better descriptors: "duplicate jealousy," "duplicate intolerance," "duplicate hatred." However, they're familiar terms, so that's what I used.)

But yes, unfortunately, it is likely to come off as such, particularly as this person does seem pretty possessive of the muse. And I'm not saying that nastily, we're all kind of possessive, in some way or another, most of us have had negative things with our muses' canon or fanon. It's just when you're being nastily possessive and defensive toward other RPers that this is an issue. If they're inclined to be defensive like that, it's very possible that anything you say is going to come off badly.

All you can do is try your best and remember that it isn't actually about you as a person or your portrayal. It's about them. It doesn't say anything real about you. If it happens, please, don't let it make you feel bad about yourself!

Are you writing-mutuals or just mutuals?

If you write together, this is almost certainly going to be easier. There's an established connection with you that is positive. If you are mutuals who do not write together, it might be a little more difficult. I know that I feel positively about my non-writing mutuals, I enjoy them so much on my dash and in OOC conversations, but for some people, there is a sort of distance that exists there.

I think in either case, bringing it up is the most difficult part. I mean that as in...sending a message in general. If you're writing partners, you've already spoken, maybe you even speak fairly regularly, and it's not going to feel fully out of nowhere to come to them with a concern.

If that is the case, try something like:

Hey! I hope this doesn't stress you or anything, and you don't need to rush to get back to me, I just want to talk to you about it whenever you have time. I know you're not meaning it hatefully, but when you say things about owning -muse name- it's kind of hurtful to me because I write him as well on another blog. It's maybe silly, but I think you'll understand because you do love -muse name- so much too!

If you've seen them post specific problems they have with the way the muse was done in canon or addressed by fandom that you agree with, it could be a great idea to add that. You want to show that you understand where they're coming from and do care about the muse, too. Think of it like bonding. It's hard to be irrationally angry with people when we're forced to see the ways that we're similar.

I can feel the same way. Every time I see them being -referred to in a negative way, made wildly OOC in these ways, etc. just be specific- it goes all over me! I'm like, no, no, no, I've kidnapped him, he's mine now! It's just that as someone writing a portrayal of the same muse, it can feel aimed at me.

Either way, revisit the issue and how you feel.

Like I said, I'm sure you're not meaning it like that and you were unaware that I write him too, but I know that I wouldn't want to make someone feel hurt expressing it that way, so, I wanted to talk to you about it. It can make me feel like, if you knew I wrote him as well, you might not want to write with me anymore or would feel negatively about my portrayal. I really enjoy your portrayal and writing with you, obviously, so, it's more hurtful than just some rando out in fandom saying that kind of thing. I hope you understand!

If you don't write together:

Honestly, about the same thing without the familiarity.

Either way, what you're going for here is understanding. You want them to understand that you don't mean this hatefully, you're not trying to tell them what to do or anything, but these things are hurtful to you. Getting them to understand why it is hurtful to you without seeming accusatory.

And some really careful phrasing can go a long way. Instead of "you make me feel" make it an impersonal "this/it makes me feel" or even an "I feel." They're not directly being hateful to you by intent, they're just kind of oblivious to how saying things this way could be hurtful to someone else. So, you want to make them aware while not feeling attacked over it.

Do not give them ideas of you being possessive etc. by stating any such words! I know the inclination can be to attempt covering bases by saying things like, "I don't mean this possessively" or "I'm not trying to come off as" or "sorry if this sounds like x, I don't mean it that way or feel like that!" But those inclinations imply the opposite, even if unconsciously so. Don't put the words there to bring up that association.

Keep the tone honest but kind. Let them know how you feel without putting that emotion into what you're saying. Tell them that it is hurtful, you might feel judged or suddenly disliked, without coming off as defensive, angry, or incredibly sad. It's probably better if you stay away from being too descriptive about what "hurt" means to you for this reason, or anything you've done when feeling particularly hurt, like having to avoid your dash on this blog. These things can trigger reactions of defense or guilt.

Things you're not saying are pretty important here. Don't try to give suggestions as to how to resolve it, for example. While that is often a great idea when we discuss problems with each other, in this case, it's going to sound controlling. Don't offer suggestions as to what they could say instead, or even state that they need to stop saying these things. That needs to be the natural take away from you telling them that this is hurtful to you!

If it isn't the natural take away and they continue to do it after this conversation (especially if they've expressed being upset about unintentionally hurting you and a desire to not do so going forward), then, this is not a good partnership. That might be really disappointing and even more hurtful, but if they don't care when you've expressed that something they're doing has hurt you, they're someone you shouldn't keep interacting with. Again, especially if they've said they wouldn't keep doing it and that they cared! That means that they're willing to express care and interest only as far as smoothing over a problem goes while continuing the problem itself, and likely, because they don't feel it's a big deal.

And speaking of that...

If they literally do tell you that it isn't a big deal? This is a good time to terminate the relationship with them, too. Maybe it isn't, but when someone tells you that you've upset them, it's a big deal to them. Coming to someone to tell them that they've hurt you is a big deal, it's not easily done. We all have had something that we genuinely feel is not a big deal that has hurt someone, and you know what? That's fine, things can be a non-issue for us but still hurt someone else...it's how we respond to being told that matters. So, if their response is telling you this (aggressively or passive-aggressively, as in "it's not a big deal but ok if it makes you feel that way") sort of thing, you're seriously better off getting away from them now, not later.

Should that happen, or the conversation otherwise become nasty? It's absolutely alright to say, "Alright, well, I don't think we need to keep discussing this, it isn't benefiting either of us. I'm going to just unfollow, but I hope you keep having a great time in RP!" And do that. Stop the conversation, go unfollow, don't interact anymore.

Just because you brought up an issue does not mean you're obliged to be treated badly until they're done with it. Let them respond, and if it's hateful, you only owe the respect that you've been shown. Try to end it on a polite note for yourself - the way we feel about and engage with our muses is a touchy subject (reasonably), it's not ridiculous to assume that it could cause some drama addressing this, so, don't give them anything that feels like justification to proceed with that kind of thing. You'll at least know that you behaved like a respectful adult person.

I really do not envy you, Anon! This is a tricky situation! But I do applaud your maturity in wanting to talk to them about it. A lot of muns out there would just silently stew in their hurt until it became something aggressive, or would just block them. Though difficult, I think this is the right thing to do, and I wish you all the luck in the world!

Hopefully, they'll be like I would be...a bit mortified that I'd made someone feel hurt with commentary I felt was merely throw away statements.

[blueheartedmayor]

I have big big troubles finding new rp partners which causes me to be nearly inactive because I don't have anyone to roleplay with. Searching through tumblr is impossible for active blogs. And if I find someone, they're mutuals only, and I don't know how to interact with those. And many I find also don't want new partners. It always feels like its my fault for not finding new partners

OOC: Sorry about the sorta late reply. I’ve been making icons since yesterday.

I agree. Searching any of the tags is absolutely pointless. I can only speak for this fandom but... Boy are things quieter than they used to be. It’s gotten to the point where some people (myself included) actually stop sharing their own promos because there’s barely anyone to find from that (If anything, I think my last reblog of my promo got more attention from non-roleplaying blogs). On top of that, activity on blogs that are around vary immensely. Because there are fewer options than there were when I started, it’s easy to feel like you’re doing something wrong. I assure you, it’s not the case at all.

You are right about a lot of blogs being more closed off than they used to be, and I do get the reasoning for that. But like you said, it makes it hard for people trying to find their place. I can’t give you guaranteed advice that will bring about success, but I can try and share some ideas.

I know I’ve mentioned before about checking rules pages. Some people might have it that they’re mutuals only by default, but their asks are open for anyone. If that’s the case, I definitely recommend giving it a try. While it can work as an ice-breaker, it’s also a good way to show the blog you exist, especially if, like me, you run side-blogs.

With that in mind, check your own blog and make sure things are accessible and readable. If someone I don’t recognise follows a blog of mine, I’ll usually click through and check theirs out. Now, before you start stressing, I absolutely don’t mean to go build a custom theme with unique photoshopped whatevers. You’re talking to the mun who literally uses the same theme on three different sideblogs but in different colours. Going by personal experience of checking blogs on app and on a laptop, you should instead focus on the following:

Content: Is your information accessible? Do you have a page or post giving information about your muse, and if so, can they be found easily? Common sense things, really, but I’ve seen blogs over the years that either omit this entirely, or make it very difficult to find.

Sample of writing: Not in terms of how active you are. A few months ago, I was checking out a blog on my phone. I had to scroll for nearly ten minutes on a blog before I could find an actual writing sample from a thread. It’s perfectly okay to have memes and related images on your blog (again, I do it regularly), but be sure they’re not hiding your writing. Use the queue to play it safe. 

Silly things, I know, but if you make the first move to follow a mutuals only blog, you wanna give yourself the best chance so they will follow back. I wanna compare it to an artist in a convention’s artist alley setting up their stall. You have to have everything looking just right to draw people in, right?

On the topic of writing, I noticed you mention how you’re not active because of this problem. Perhaps you could channel your creative frustration into short drabbles or monologues? It would be a good way to vent and to make sure you don’t get too rusty.

Another option is to consider crossovers with other fandoms. For example, I have a side-step verse where Damien is Mayor of Ha.llowe’en Town from the Nig.htmare Before Chris.tmas due to a mix-up. It’s also a fun challenge to see how your character might adapt to a different world, whether due to being thrown there, or having lived there instead of their normal world.

Admittedly, the fandom as a whole needs a little kick and some positive encouragement to open up a little more. Myself and some others had hoped Heist would bring some new people in, but it didn’t really work in the way we had expected. It’s a problem I’m not entirely sure how to fix, and I’m sure it’s not even something I myself can ‘fix’ since I’m not any sort of important voice. But I will say this. If you currently do have partners, appreciate and cherish them. They are the ones that will stick by you no matter what. 

I am sorry you’ve been hit with that awful feeling, despite trying your hardest. That’s the part you should make sure to remind yourself of: you are trying. It would be a different case if you were waiting for everyone to find you while you make no effort. Things might seem bleak, but time can do some good things. When I started, there were some blogs I was terrified of interacting with. Like you, I had no idea how I was supposed to approach and interact (especially with me harbouring a fear of being blocked if I made a wrong move). It took time, but the right little connections happened, circles meshed together so I appeared on their dash, and I was eventually noticed by them. That’s why I suggested to make sure you have the necessary information accessible. Any decent person won’t mind whether you have a fancy theme, use icons of any sort, or format your writing. At the end of the day, we’re writing together, and that ought to be what matters when looking at your blog.

...

I realise this is probably me blathering on about nothing, but I hope something in this helped. Like I said, I’m not really a big voice or a popular blog, so I don’t really have solid advice. Keep your chin up and take it one day at a time. I believe in you!!

PS. Just as I was proof-reading this, I remembered that some of the people I got to know over time were through Di.scord groups. While a server can be a great way to break the ice.... I’m not sure I’d recommend setting one up in the hopes of inviting people in. The one that springs to mind first descended into drama that I’m still not sure of and was ultimately deleted when I was asleep. Now I think about it, most of those people either hopped fandoms or went on hiatus... I hope they’re doing okay.

PPS. Another idea. Would checking out people your partners write with be an idea? I always imagine a rp blog to be like a circle, and by interacting with others, you can link to their circle and see their connections. That way, the third person might have experience of you from seeing you on their dash!