#Don't be ridiculous sapling! *Nothing* could infuriate him like Dipper does! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

tswwwit · 4 months ago

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One of the neat things about demon flirting versus human flirting is the opportunity for jealousy. Weird jealousy.

Bill complains to Dipper about a lot of things. How his day was going. About any plans that were foiled, if any. How dumb other beings are. But if, say, Bill started going on about this one real pest he's had hanging around lately, and how they're so irritating and getting in his way...

It is said that husbands gain a sixth sense upon becoming married. In Bill's case, it was actually his thirteenth - but when he notices Dipper’s gone oddly quiet, he hears the alarm bells ringing.

Oh, so this person, huh. Really irritating, Bill says. A thorn in his side, maybe? How annoying, exactly? Now Bill’s sweating as Dipper’s own annoyance rises. What, are they, like a new *nemesis* or something?

Now Bill’s on damage control duty as he reassures Dipper - entirely truthfully! - that he’s soooo infuriating and definitely the Worst Thing that's ever happened to him.

#these are just some thoughts I thunk #Bill’s all over Dipper as he calms his huffy husband #Don't be ridiculous sapling! *Nothing* could infuriate him like Dipper does!#He's the thorn in his side! The needle straight through his eye!#Nobody and nothing fills Bill with such a boiling desire to see him fall from his high horse and crush him like an ant #For all the clever and awful ways he thwarts his evil plans. the cutest worst person in the closest ninethousand dimensions.#All the while getting up in his face and grabbing at him while Dipper grumbles #Yeah well. Bill’s the absolute most vile jerk in *ten million* dimensions. Just the worst jerk.#Dipper wants nothing more than to kick him off the top of his dumbass pyramid and watch him dent all his angles on the way down #And with that there is a round of extremely sloppy makeouts #Cut to a regular human watching them with a complete 'what the fuck' expression #and a tired looking demon next to them going 'oh for crying out loud. GET A ROOM YOU TWO'

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