#Don’t worry Gan you don’t know what you have until you lose it so YOU’LL LEARN SOON ENOUGH YOU MORON

[skyloftian-nutcase]

(@kikker-oma yelled at me to stop hiding my Imprisoning War writing because I didn’t want to dump it all on y’all but she’s right, my blog my rules LOL)

Ganondorf watched his daughter as she slept.

He wasn’t often… reflective. Not in this manner, at least. He was a man of action, always looking forward, wanting to accomplish the next thing, obtain more, do more. In a desert where he had been looked to for guidance and leadership, where resources had been scarce and one had to constantly be on the move to survive, Ganondorf had learned that periods of reflection should be kept to the periphery, and sentimentality was hardly useful.

Yet here he was, watching his little girl sleep, thinking about how she’d grown so much.

He wanted his children to become strong and independent. He did. They were reflections of himself, of their mother, and he was proud of the people they were growing into. They served him well and learned well. They… they were growing up.

Tomorrow was his twins’ fifteenth birthday, and he didn’t know how to feel about it.

He remembered when they were babies, how small and delicate and helpless they were. He remembered being excited, looking forward to the days that they could fight, that they could understand how the world worked and seek power for themselves. But now that they were approaching that point, he suddenly found himself missing the nights where he’d just walk back and forth on the balcony with them in his arms.

Ganondorf had never really tolerated weakness. It got people killed. It was useless to him. Babies couldn’t help such weaknesses, but it made them not really a concern to him. Yet when he’d had his children, their weakness had called to him, compelled him to do everything he could to protect them. And now… he found himself missing those nights.

What was wrong with him?

“How are they growing up so fast?”

Glancing beside him, Ganondorf saw his wife, Nabooru, also watching Hemisi. He didn’t comment; he didn’t know how time had flown by either.

It was not a new feeling either. It was growing concerning, honestly, how often he fell back to this nostalgia sometimes. He remembered when the twins turned ten, he had nearly had a meltdown just thinking about it.

Having children certainly did make him softer than he used to be. But… he supposed that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Soft wasn’t… wasn’t always weak.

“I practically got kicked out of Merovar’s room,” Nabooru sighed, amusement mixing wistfully with sadness. “He said I was fussing too much.”

“He shouldn’t do that,” Ganondorf immediately said, frowning. Merovar shouldn’t be disrespectful to his mother.

“He’s probably right,” Nabooru lamented. “I miss when they were babies. I felt far more useful to them back then.”

Perhaps that was the issue. Perhaps Ganondorf felt useless for his children. But that wasn’t the case. They still had much to learn, and obtaining the Triforce would benefit them greatly.

“They still need us,” Ganondorf noted gently.

“Not for long, they won’t,” Nabooru replied. “If we’re any good at our job, at least.”

Ganondorf sighed, looking back at Hemisi. Was this the fate of all parents? To make themselves obsolete to their children? To miss the days they were needed, like the elders he recalled from his youth, too broken to fight but too stubborn to die? He recalled some said he should seek their wisdom, but what wisdom could failed warriors provide him?

Perhaps he should have sought them out. Perhaps they knew of this heartache.

What a night. He hated feeling like this. Closing his eyes, he purposefully pushed the image of his children out of his mind, hand brushing against Nabooru. “Best not to linger on it.”

His wife chuckled, turning with him as the couple walked away. “No, I suppose not. You’re really not comfortable with thinking about such things, I know. But it’s okay to dwell on the matter, to hurt.”

Now he just rolled his eyes. “Stop being sentimental. You know I hate that.”

“You love everything about me,” Nabooru insisted with a sly smile, bumping him with her hip. “And you could learn a thing or two about sentimentality. Though it seems you have – I saw you playing with the boy during the festival, after all.”

Ganondorf didn’t bother defending himself anymore. Link had wormed his way into the man’s heart well enough. For now, at least, while everything was at peace.

“It’s cold,” he said, deflecting instead. “Let’s get to bed.”

Nabooru moved to stand in front of him. “Not unless you admit it.”

He didn’t want to get into this, but he never really did. And his wife wouldn’t let him avoid it. She never backed down from a fight. It was one of the things he loved about her.

But Ganondorf loved to fight too.

“Sentimentality only weakens resolve,” he tried first, crossing his arms.

“The strongest souls have the kindest hearts,” Nabooru fired back easily. “You think I’m weak? I can love just as well as anyone.”

“You know when to turn that off.”

“I never said you should always be sentimental. I just said such emotions in themselves are not bad.”

Ganondorf tried for a counterattack, and found himself biting the inside of his cheek in annoyance instead. Sighing heavily, he relented for now. “Fine. I miss when they were little.”

Smiling triumphantly, Nabooru leaned forward to kiss him briefly and then pulled him into their room. Despite her victory (how did she almost always win against him, anyway?), she still looked sad.

Ganondorf pulled her into an embrace. “You’re forgetting something important, my dear.”

His wife melted into the hug, closing her eyes and taking a slow, relaxing breath, humming for him to continue.

“I’m stronger than all of you,” he noted with a smug smirk. “So they’ll always need me.”

Nabooru’s relaxed posture immediately stiffened as she laughed at the challenge, pushing him off and walking towards the bed. “Try me, oh mighty warrior. I’ve defeated you before.”

Smirking, Ganondorf followed his wife to bed.

[lavendermin]

if all stars fell at once (2) | xiao

pairing | xiao/reader

word count | 2.5k

genre | fluff, light angst, developing relationship, overall domestic

warnings | eventual smut

The moon was high behind the peaks of mountains; a deep navy sky clear in display of its many twinkling stars. Though the land was asleep, the crickets softly hummed their conversation and a few fireflies speckled the dark.

Perhaps it’s your high spirits at the change of routine and tender moment under falling stars, but the scenery around you has never looked more magical.

“If you continue to stare up at the sky while you walk, you’ll lose your footing and fall.”

You turned around at Xiao’s comment, face still alight with a grin you were sure made you look like a giddy child. The faint smile on his lips gave away his amusement.

“And if I do, will you be there to catch me?”

“Anywhere, anytime,” Xiao reassured, arms crossed over his chest.

Though it was a rhetorical question, the power his aura exuded as an adeptus solidified his words as not only a confirmation, but a promise.

Approaching the steps that lead further up the village to where your house was tucked away, you paused. Noticing this, Xiao looked up at you and was met with your outstretched hand— patient and waiting. His lips slightly parted in brief confusion, and the innocence his eyes held reminded you of a kitten curiously approaching something new.

Endearment. It pulled your heartstrings in the honeyed melody that had you in its audience.

There was brief hesitation. His gloved hand slowly settled into yours and he quietly allowed you to lead him up the stone steps of the winding hills. The warmth rose high on his cheeks, unnoticed by you as you led the way in your sleep-driven haze.

The exhaustion of the day seeped into your bones as you hobbled tiredly over to the familiar front door. Xiao watched attentively as you sluggishly fumbled around for a vase to hold your glaze lilies while getting ready for bed. Mortals were undeniably limited in their energy— always dependent on slumber and moments of rest to replenish and recharge their energy. However bothersome it seemed to Xiao before, seemed to have a change of heart upon seeing your switch in demeanor. It was… cute, and such thoughts filled him with the overwhelming need to just— hold you safely in his arms.

Gods… he was so touch starved and didn’t even know it. Such strange urges only served to further vex & confuse him.

Kneeling by your bedside, he pushed some hair out of your face. You were comfortably under a sea of blankets, the warmth of them quickly promising to have your wish come true. Through heavy lids, you gave him a goofy grin; mind aloof with lulls of sleep.

“Thank you for watching the stars with me.”

There you go again. Thanking him for such trivial and insignificant things. It flustered him. No— it made the fearsome Conqueror of Demons bashful.

“It’s nothing to thank me for,” Xiao uttered softly, fingers absentmindedly combing through your hair. You only hummed and relaxed into his touch in response, too tired to chide him.

“Did you mean it?” you groggily muttered from under your covers. “Wanting to get to know me more.”

Xiao nodded. “Rest now. We can talk later.”

The yaksha froze in his advances to leave, feeling the faintest tug on his sleeve.

“Stay… please, Xiao,” you begged weakly. “Just until I fall asleep.”

There was an uncharacteristic mix of fear and defeat in those words alone. It made his chest twinge with hurt. The wish you made earlier… Was sleep truly that difficult for you? He wondered what would impede your nights with restlessness. With a defeated sigh, the yaksha settled back next to you.

“Thank y–“ Xiao cut you off with a breathy chuckle, placing his hand over your eyes.

“Just sleep. I’ll stay.”

Not even two minutes had passed, yet you were already fast asleep. So, you were only keeping awake out of stubbornness… Somehow it no longer surprised him. Xiao watched as your breathing became steadier, face relaxed into your tranquil state of sleep.

Though the promise was only to stay until you were fast asleep, Xiao found himself unable to leave— unwilling to leave. To wish for enough sleep… it only left him wondering what the issue there was.

Perhaps a year ago he would have scoffed at the idea of trying to solve a human’s sleeping problem. My, how you've gotten him wrapped around your finger. Still, he sat in the dark room washed over by pale moonlight and stared absentmindedly at the ceiling, lost in his own thoughts. Were you a light sleeper? Or perhaps it was insomnia, though it would contradict how fast you fell asleep. The only other possibility he could consider was an external force that came to make a ruckus at night.

Part of him was fighting to just leave. It was none of his business to be a sleep therapist.

I wish to get to know you better.

The wish he made— though he didn’t believe in mortals’ naive, wishful thinking, he truly did want to know you better. That single want was the thread that bound him to his current disposition.

Before he knew it, he had already stayed an hour. Muffled whimpering pulled him out of his thoughts as he glanced back over to you. There was a thin sheen of sweat on your forehead as you shifted around. Your brows were furrowed in discomfort and face in a frown that shifted from fear to stress.

Ah. Nightmares.

Somehow the thought had escaped him, and now he was reminded of the unpredictability of mortal dreams.

Dream eater. That’s what he once was. The memories of his past, the dreams he painfully consumed, were enough to raise bile in his throat in a suffocating feeling. He wasn’t sure how to help you. Comforting others was never his strong suit and the thought of eating your dream… It made his hand tremble. In anticipation or fear, he couldn’t say.

The hesitation was clear, seeping into his movements as his hand slowly drew closer over your head.

“It’s… okay,” he quietly reassured, awkwardly patting your head in what he attempted to be a comforting motion. “I’m right here.”

Slowly, your face eased into a more relaxed state. Your breathing returned to a steady rhythm as you settled back into a restful sleep. Perhaps the nightmare had already subsided for the time being.

Xiao hadn’t realized until now how his shoulders stiffened with lingering worry, nor how he had held his breath to see your expression change. He scoffed inwardly at himself, rising from the bed and descending back into the night to continue his eternal back-and-forth with the karmic debt that hung over his shoulders.

“I’ve long gone past the point of no return.”

——

“Emissary Ganyu, what a pleasant surprise running into you today.” You warmly greeted the busy-bee secretary of Yuehai Pavilion. Her entrance to Bubu Pharmacy was graceful, and she warmly reciprocated the greeting.

Slight embarrassment dusted her cheeks as she privately added, “P-Please, the formality is a little… You don’t have to use the titles. I’m content with just being Ganyu when we meet.” She waved a hand dismissively at herself. “But I digress, what brings you here today?”

With a tired sigh and halfhearted smile, you gestured toward the box of medicine herbalist Gui was packing for you. “Nothing severe. I just ran out of medicine for headaches and remedies for stress.”

Ganyu’s expression softened with knowing concern. “Has sleep become an issue once again?”

You nodded, handing the herbalist what you owed with a grateful ‘thank you’. “Slept rather well last night at least. I feel fine today,” you reassure with a smile.

Being alive as long as she has, Ganyu has known your family for generations and witnessed all that has traversed them for as long as she can remember. The stresses that ail you— the sources of your sleeplessness— Ganyu knew them well.

The sole remaining descendant of your family. Perhaps she saw herself in you, and that’s why she kept her promise to your grandmother of being someone you could rely on.

“That’s a relief to hear,” Ganyu sighed, expression relaxing from its worry. “I came here to drop off licensing renewals and paperwork for Baizhu. If you’re feeling up to it, we can catch up with a quick lunch.”

Ever the busy-body, you mused fondly.

“I’d like that.”

Never a dull moment with her, Ganyu was quick to get you in step with her schedule flow. Luckily, you were rested enough to keep up with her today.

You anxiously fiddled with the napkin on your lap. “Isn't this a bit… much?”

Seated within the highly-regarded Liuli Pavilion, you couldn’t help but feel a little out of place. Such enticing dishes laid out before you… smelled expensive. It wasn’t the first time you’d been brought to eat here with her, and though it was a rarity you were still never one to indulge too much in lavish luxury from the city.

“Not at all,” Ganyu wholeheartedly reassured. “It's my treat for such a rare occasion.”

“You spoil me, Gan…”

As you both idly chatted over delicately prepared meals, you couldn’t help but notice the not-so-subtle glances Ganyu would take toward your lap every now and then. With a half-hearted sigh and a growing smile that betrayed your feigned exasperation, you set down your utensils.

“Okay. Alright.” Ganyu’s eyes sparkled, already knowing you caved. “Just ask what you want.”

“The charm,” she started, eyes intently observing the small charm that dangled securely from your hip. Never one to miss something new about you. The attentiveness from the adeptal blood that flowed within her, presumably. “Where did you get it? Ah! Pardon my prying— I don’t mean to be nosy...”

With delicate fingers, you picked it up, eyes glossing over it. The beat of your heart picked up ever so slightly.

“It was a gift.”

Left next to the vase of glaze lilies, the glint of the charm catching the morning light drew your attention toward it. You delicately picked up the item, tracing the butterfly engraved on the wooden diamond with your fingertip. The piece of amber that dangled from it with an ornate tassel was warm on your palm.

A single note on a small piece of parchment laid next to it.

‘An adepti amulet to stave off evil. Should you need me, call my name.’

“Xiao…” Ganyu started, clasping your hand in hers. “He must truly consider you someone special. It’s not often he gives gifts— despite how surprisingly skilled he is in intricate crafts.”

Warm and fuzzy, your chest pounded with overwhelming emotion. A handmade amulet… It was beautiful in its simplicity, and carried meaning in its subtle details you had yet to decipher. You had to remember to thank him for it later.

“He’s a very gentle person. I’d also… like to get to know him better,” you absentmindedly mused, recalling that mysterious masked boy caught in the thundering rain all those months ago. Though reserved and self-guarded, Xiao was never anything but polite albeit a bit distanced for a while.

It seems they get along well together, Ganyu noted, gaze holding a tender fondness like one would with a sibling. Maybe this was the new walk of life you needed when all other roads were erased.

——

“Can’t I just-”

“No.”

You huffed through your nose, exasperated. “You’re being unfair.” Xiao only raised a brow in response.

“An adeptus prolonging your lifespan would be considered a divine blessing to any other mortal out there,” he countered, pushing you back into bed with a gentle nudge that you didn’t fight back. “Rest.”

Making me go to bed early is some divine blessing... Such sarcasm you would keep between yourself and your thoughts alone.

“Xiao, it’s only nine o’clock! The moon just barely appeared in the sky. And with the Lantern Rite just around the corner, I want to get as much of my part finished.” But your protests fell on deaf ears as he continued to diligently pile on any blankets he could get his hands on. With a defeated sigh, you allowed your body to sink more comfortably into the mattress. “Is something wrong?”

Your voice came quiet, the question lingering with worry as Xiao sat on the edge of the bed— his back facing you. Oftentimes it was still hard to tell what he was thinking, for there was a lot about his past that was unknown to you and it seemed to weigh heavily on his mind recently. He didn’t need to tell you for you to know there were things he wasn’t voicing— not without your encouragement and patient reassurance.

“Can I ask?” Xiao started, his voice rather quiet like he was afraid of overstepping a boundary. “Your nightmares— how often do they haunt you?”

You were taken aback. “A-Ah, you saw…?”

With a silent nod, the bed creaked as he readjusted himself to finally face you. “That night you told me to stay… You looked distressed in your sleep.”

“They only happen sometimes,” you reassured half-heartedly with a dismissive wave of your hand. The subtle, sharpened squint of his eyes told you he saw right through your downplay.

“Lies will do you no good. But in regards to them, I...”

Xiao paused, looking away briefly. The way he avoided your gaze, the jaded look in his amber eyes— there was something he was fighting with himself to say.

“I can get rid of them, if you wish it.”

You blinked, eyes widening slightly in confused curiosity. “You can… do that?”

At this point, you would take any method to end some of your daily exhaustion. But the way his hands balled into fists at his lap suggested he didn’t have a good history with it. Still, he nodded, his eyes closed as he concentrated on grounding himself— convincing himself to tell you. Now that he had propositioned it, there was no turning back. He had to explain it but the memories—the screams— they stopped the words at his throat.

His mind was going a mile a minute in a constant war, the resolve to see through what he had started diminishing. Yet all at once, it stopped and his eyes shifted down to your quiet reassurance— your hand placed atop his fist. He took a steadying breath.

“I’ve eaten dreams before,” Xiao started, eyes closed as he reminisced. “There exist several methods developed over centuries to perform it. Many are painless and safe. A nightmare or a dream—either can be eaten and it would be as if you had no recollection of it afterwards.”

“So… it wipes it from my memory?”

“In a similar concept, yes.”

You nodded slowly, brows scrunched in thought as you processed the idea.

“Do you trust me with doing this, should you have nightmares?”

All it took was a moment. You were quick to melt away his doubts with the warmth that radiated from your softening gaze. And with a gentle squeeze to his hand, you replied.

“I trust you.”

[notchesandbullets]

Ryokuryuu’s Lifeline

Part 6: Pain

Your back collided harshly with cold stone as the officers tossed you around in the alley. Just like you predicted, it didn't take long for them to find you. They always hunted for unsuspecting women and children wandering around late at night.

Tch, what kind of sick person prays on innocent people...

You wiped your mouth with the back of your hand, the skin coming away spotted with scarlet. Snarling, you launched yourself at the closest officer, and he fell down with a surprised shout. The other pulled you off of him, fist making contact with your jaw, almost knocking you out.

You blinked as the world around you spun.

Here we go...

Then, it all faded to black.

///

"Whatever it comes down to, I'll be right there with you. I promise."

Your determined voice pulsed through Yona's mind as she trekked up the hill to where her comrades were for the night, recalling what you had said to her the night Captain Gi-gan drew up the initial battle plans. Jae-ha had nodded off, and you both were exchanging hushed whispers, careful not to catch the attention of a certain hovering Thunder Beast. When you had first proposed the idea of going in undercover without telling anyone, she immediately was against it.

Yona didn't know what Yang Kum-ji had done to you personally, but she definitely didn't want to give him an opportunity to repeat it. You hastily rationalized your idea, knowing you didn't have a lot of time before Jae-ha woke up. The conversations the crew was engaged in rose in volume above yours, effectively concealing it from curious ears.

"I'm ready to face him. I've been running, but not anymore. If I can save one person from the fate that Jae-ha saved me from, then I'm going to do it."

Your tone left no room for argument, and Yona didn't have to ask to know that you didn't tell Jae-ha or the captain any of this. She would tell them tomorrow so that they would at least know about it before they started the infiltration.

Maybe they could dissuade you.

She glanced up to see Hak's dark figure leaning against the cliff. Yona stepped past him, but didn't get very far. She let out a shriek as he slammed her against the rock, pinning her with his arms on either side of her head.

"What can I do..." Yona looked up to see Hak's normally clear, cobalt eyes had darkened to obsidian. "...to stop you?"

"Hak..." Yona murmured.

"Do you know how dangerous it is to go to Kum-ji's place? You just did something reckless, didn't you?!" He shouted, gritting his teeth as he remembered the despair that filled him when Yona and the others were trapped in a cave in at Seiryuu's village.

He leaned his face into her shoulder, hoping to hide the fear in his eyes. "Sometimes... I want to tie you down."

Yona couldn't ignore his words as her heart shook, "Hak! M-Move aside!"

He didn't budge, despite her best attempts to create some kind distance between them and retain some of her usual color in her face. Eventually, she sighed and relented.

She needed him to hear her reasons for doing this, just like you had explained yours to her. "I used to think Kouka was an abundant country. I thought it was a country where people smiled and there was no conflict just like my father desired."

Yona paused, taking a second to formulate her thoughts into words. "But, the land of the Fire Tribe and Awa port haven't changed since my father's reign. Responsibility for the Fire Tribe and this town being the way they are also lies with me."

"Hak," He pulled back slightly to stare directly into her eyes, but Yona brushed off how her heart stuttered, intent on finishing. "Let me go. I am going to fight."

Her violet eyes burned with searing fire, and he let her pass, watching as the princess walked the rest of the way back towards camp. His heart was beating so violently, and he feared it would beat right out of his chest.

"Tsk, even though I said I absolutely don't want her to go... I'm shaking with... excitement? I want to see the princess..." Hak grinned, eyes glowing with unspoken pride. "End this successfully."

He sat up in alarm as an anguished scream pierced the silent night air. Kija, Shin-ah, Yoon and Yona burst from the forest, startling Hak even more.

"What was that?!" Yona cried out as Kija panted beside her. It was obvious that he was the only one who had been asleep.

Shin-ah pointed to the pirate ship, "Ryokuryuu..."

They tore through the night, reaching the docks in record time.

"What's going on?!" Hak demanded, eyes widening as they landed on Jae-ha's shaking form, clutching a crumpled piece of paper in his hands and Captain Gi-gan glared at them.

"Shouldn't you know?" The captain retorted savagely.

Kija was bewildered. "What?"

Yona carefully went to Jae-ha's side, easing the paper from his grip and unfolding it.

She almost dropped it.

Scrawled in blurry ink, she made out the message.

Jae-ha,

I'm sorry, but I've got to do this. It's selfish for me to hide while others take on the same fate that you spared me from so long ago. I have to do my part too. Yona inspired me, but please don't be angry with her. She did know, I asked her not to tell you. I understand I'm a coward for not telling you this in person, I was afraid I'd lose my resolve if I faced you. I know you'll probably hate me after this, but I want to save them. I'll do anything to save them from the pain that Kum-ji will inflict on them. There was so much I wanted to say to you... I'm sorry I couldn't. Know that you meant everything to me, Jae-ha.

-Y/N

P.S. Keep a lookout for metallic green attached to a mast, Captain Gi-gan. That will indicate which ship Kum-ji is on. I'm sorry I left without saying goodbye, but perhaps Yona will be a better replacement for me. Thank you for all the lessons that you've taught me. I will treasure it forever.

"You idiot," Yona lifted her head as she heard Captain Gi-gan scoff brokenly. "As if anyone could ever replace you."

Jae-ha's violent sobs racked his body, shattering Yona's heart. He was bent over, head pressed against the wood, darkening it as endless tears fell from his eyes.

"I-I'm so sorry, Jae-ha!" Yona let out a cry, the reality of what you had done setting in, and the pain crashed over her in waves. She reached out to him, but Hak grabbed her by the arm, shoving her behind him protectively. There was no telling what the distraught Ryokuryuu would do in this state.

Je-ha didn't seem to hear Yona, all he could think about was you.

How he failed you.

How he couldn't keep you safe.

You went back, did you not care about him at all?

You meant everything to me, Jae-ha....

His body trembled as your soft voice echoed in his head, and he cried harder, teeth nearly cracking underneath the pressure as his jaw clenched in agony.  

Why?

Why did you do this to him?

Didn't you know how much it would hurt him?

"Jae-ha..." He faintly heard Captain Gi-gan's voice, but it seemed so far away. No one was there to calm him down.

You were gone.

Would he ever see you again?

"Jae-ha." Her voice was clearer this time.

"Y/N..." Looking up, Jae-ha thought he saw your concerned face, but as his vision cleared, he saw the captain peering down at him worriedly, unmistakable sadness etched in her eyes.

She wrapped her arms around him, embracing him tightly as Jae-ha sobbed into her shoulder for what seemed like hours until he finally stopped and she released him.

The deck was empty, he had no idea when everyone had left, but he was grateful for their absence for once.

"Jae-ha, we'll get her back." Captain Gi-gan stated fiercely.

His eyes were swimming with grief, regret and a whirlwind of other emotions she couldn't identify and the captain knew it was only a matter of time before he spiraled out of control. You were the only one who could keep him successfully grounded, just like he did for you, and as much as she despised the way you went about things, she understood why.

After all you had been through, there was no way you would be able to convince her, let alone Jae-ha, to let you go back to the man who had kept you chained to an alleyway.

Captain Gi-gan begrudgingly acknowledged the rationality in your plan, but that didn't mean she agreed with it.

There was a very high chance you wouldn't make it out alive and that was a possibility she was not willing to entertain.

Yona and Yoon were supposed to leave the day of the exchange taking place with the Kai Empire, which was scheduled to be tomorrow. By being there a whole 24 hours more than them, there was no telling what state you would be in once they found you.

If they found you.

"We're going to get her back." She reminded him firmly, just as much for his sake as it was for her. "Jae-ha, you've got to fight for her."

That snapped something inside of him, and in a heartbeat, he was on his feet, a murderous look in his eyes. Fury blazed from within him and threatened to scorch any living thing that got too close.

"Captain," Green hair obscured her view of his eyes, but if she was able to see it, she would see the unhinged anger and desperation flashing in them. "I might not be able to hold myself back this time. I am going to kill him and anyone else who gets in my way." He warned.

She sighed, "She wouldn't want us to do that, but I'm not sure I can hold back either."

They had taken you away from her again, even if you went willingly to stop them.

Yang Kum-ji was going to pay for the girls that he had stolen from their homes, but he was going to pay a million times over if he so much as breathed on you.

Y/N... Captain Gi-gan closed her eyes in unusual desperation as Jae-ha stomped below deck, presumably to take his anger out on something. The normally calm and collected captain was gone and in her place was a worried and brokenhearted mother.

Hold on. We're coming.

[jwillowwolf]

Magic and Miracles - Chapter 8

Sanders Sides Big Bang fic, Chapter 8!

< Previous Chapter | Next Chapter > | Masterlist

Summary: “Not a morning person?”

“Does staying up until five am count?”

“Wh- no! That’s actually a bit concerning. Please don’t tell me you were up until five then only slept two hours before we started walking.”

“I won’t tell you that then.”

Warning/s: food mention.

Characters: Logan, Virgil, OCs, Roman, Remy, Remus, Patton, Janus, Emile.

Tag List: @theimprobabledreamersworld @remy-please-come-back

Read on AO3

8 | Fondness

Logan stared at the ceiling above him. It seemed like just yesterday he had been doing this out of boredom, waiting for when everyone was supposed to tour the manor. He’d been so anxious about what studying here would mean and how he would socialise with his classmates. Now though, they were all his friends, and he found himself mildly amused that he’d ever been nervous about getting to know them.

This room that had seemed so strange before had become home. Everything from the view outside his window to the softness of the bed was as familiar as his room at the bakery. Soon though, this would no longer be his home.

With the upcoming license test, he would officially become a wizard, and therefore no longer need to remain a student. He’d miss being here and having his friends so close. Come to think of it, he would miss his friends greatly too. After the test, they would be returning to their far off homes. Virgil didn’t live very far off, but Logan felt that it wouldn’t be proper for someone like him to be visiting the prince.

In a couple of days, all of Logan’s dreams about being a wizard would come true, yet he would lose the dreams he never knew he had…

“Rise and shine, witches! You’ve got a big day ahead!”

Logan shook his head, as if that would clear it of any unwanted thoughts, and got out of bed. Today he couldn’t be distracted by silly emotions. Remy was sending them on a huge quest to refine their skills before the big test.

At breakfast, everyone seemed excited for the quest. It was going to be an overnight kind of thing and they were doing it on their own. They had all been taught to teleport and a special spell that would summon Remy if the need arose, but they were still going to be doing this entirely independent of any other adults.

“Hey, you okay L?” Virgil asked as they were walking down the hall.

“Hmm?”

“You look like you’re trying to solve the meaning of life.”

“...What?”

Virgil rolled his eyes. “You look broody, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing is… wrong, per se.”

“Per se?”

“I’m probably just feeling tired from staying up last night studying the notes Remy gave us.”

“Well, hopefully, breakfast lifts your energy, because we have a long walk ahead of us.”

Logan didn't have time to even respond to that as he was tackled to the ground by a hug. "Everleigh? What are you doing here?"

"I came to wish my friends good luck of course! Your dad is here too."

Sure enough, Emile was there in the dining room waiting on everyone else with a special spread of pastries for breakfast.

"Hey kids, I figured you'd want something good to start your big day."

"It's not even test-day yet Mr Picani, but thank you! Your pastries are incredible." Willow declared.

"Well, thanks kiddo. Today isn't your test but it's still a pretty big day. I will be sure to make pastries for test day too though."

"It's not that big a quest really," Remy said. "It's just a longer trip than I usually send them on for ingredient collecting."

"Considering it's a two-day journey to retrieve a rare fruit from a cave, I doubt calling today big would be an exaggeration." Virgil pointed out.

"Back when I was learning magic, we didn't even get teleportation spells for coming back. We'd have to walk there and back, and as quickly as we could too." Remy stated.

"Whatever you say, old man."

"Old? Did you just call me old?" Remy said in a greatly offended tone.

Virgil smirked. "Yup."

Remy turned to Emile. "See what disrespect I have to deal with? You know what, I'm not even going to miss you, sassy little ankle-biters."

The teens all snickered at Remy's dramatics and then dug into their breakfast.

“So, are you guys excited?” Emile asked.

“For the quest itself, not so much. But for the afterparty,” Roman said.

“Yeah, Remy promised us that we’d even get the next day off school, so we could stay up as late as we want!” Remus added.

“I have a feeling I’m going to regret that deal,” Remy whispered to Emile, who nodded with a giggle.

“Can I come to the party?” Everleigh asked.

“Of course,” Remy replied. “They seem to get into less trouble with you around. I’m half tempted to ask you to join them on this quest of theirs.”

“We’re not that accident prone, thank you very much. We’ve kept ourselves out of trouble all month,” Janus pointed out.

“Yeah, and I’m worried you’re due for a disaster,” Remy sighed.

Logan nodded. “Statistically speaking, it’s odd that we’ve gone this long without something happening.”

“That’s comforting…” Virgil muttered.

Janus shrugged. “We’re just getting better at self-preservation. We’ll be fine.”

---

“I retract my earlier statement,” Janus declared as they were walking. “We’re all going to die of exhaustion.”

“Don’t be so dramatic, Jan, that’s my job,” Roman stated.

“And we’ve barely been walking for half a day now,” Willow pointed out.

“Half a day, mainly uphill,” Janus reiterated.

“Perhaps if we all talk about something, our minds won’t be so concentrated on the tiredness,” Patton suggested.

Logan nodded. “Yes, doing something else should distract our brains from any pain or exhaustion. Either with a stimulating conversation or some kind of sing-along.”

“I know a good song!” Remus declared. “She’ll be coming around the mountain when she comes-!”

“No! You are not starting that nightmare up again,” Roman interrupted with a stern glare at his grinning twin.

“Oh, come on, Roro. You love this song!”

“I passionately despise that song.”

“All I heard was ‘passionately’, do you want to marry this song, Ro?” Remus asked. “Or do you just want to--”

“Shut up!” Roman shouted, his face turning as red as Remus’s eyes.

“What do you have against that song?” Willow inquired.

“It’s the way she sings it,” Roman explained. “It’s not appropriate.”

Remus rolled his eyes. “All I said was-”

“No! You have lost speaking privileges.” Roman declared.

“Well then, is there anything else we can talk about?” Janus asked,

“We could play a game,” Patton suggested.

“But not eye spy or word chain,” Virgil immediately added.

Roman huffed. “Alright then, how about you suggest a game, stormcloud?”

“A race.”

Janus stared at him dumbfounded. You’re kidding, right?

Virgil shook his head. “Nope. Let’s all race to… that archway, the winner gets first pick of the treats Mr Picani gave us for lunch.”

Everyone, despite their tiredness from walking, exchanged looks of determination.

“Let’s go!”

---

Once it was close to sunset, the seven finally halted their walking and made camp with the supplies they’d been given. They had two tents, a good amount of firewood, plenty of food to go around, and sleeping bags for each of them. Janus started the fire and began heating up a pot of stew for dinner.

Remus laid himself flat on the ground. “Gods, everything hurts.”

Patton sighed. “I told you not to jump through that bush.”

“I didn’t know it was hiding a steep incline.”

“I told you it was hiding a steep incline,” Roman huffed.

“Well, when have I ever listened to you?”

Roman just sighed in exasperation, too tired to continue arguing.

“The healing spell should only take a little longer to complete,” Virgil said. “So the pain will eventually fade.”

“Eventually?!”

“Remus, you basically jumped off a cliff, please stop complaining about the consequences of your actions,” Willow said.

Remus looked at her with a raised brow. “Someone’s in a bad mood.”

“They’re hangry,” Janus stated. “And so am I, when is this thing going to finish heating up?!”

“I still have some pastries from lunch to snack on,” Patton offered.

“Oh, Patty, you’re a saint!” Willow declared joyfully.

Logan watched his teammates with a faint smile. These interactions were starkly different from how they used to treat each other in the beginning. Well, Remus and Roman still bickered, but they were siblings. Janus and Roman no longer acted like they wanted to kill one another. Willow spoke with confidence to everyone instead of their meek tones. Virgil became more social and even laughed and smiled along with the group now. Patton was still his kind-hearted self, although now he was a lot more appreciated for it.

It was a far cry from the dysfunctional class of misfits that they had been. And in Logan’s opinion, it was a real improvement. He couldn’t believe that he’d once been so set on looking out only for himself when now he was so determined to help his team. His friends…

“-gan? Logan?”

“Hmm?”

Virgil gave him a small smile. “You spaced out, I was asking if you wanted your stew now.”

“Oh, um, yes, thank you.”

Virgil handed him one of the bowls in his hands and then sat beside him. “Mind if I ask what’s got you so deep in thought?”

“I was just thinking... about how much I’ll miss all of you,” Logan admitted. “Once we’ve all passed the test and can move on with our lives, the twins will sail off to their island, Janus and Willow will go back to Evergreen Valley, Patton will return to his parents and brother, and you’ll- well, you know…”

“Do you really think after all we’ve been through together, we’d abandon each other that easily?”

“It’s possible.”

“So is the end of the world, but tomorrow is just as possible as that.”

“I’m not sure I follow.”

“Well, look at it this way. If you throw a coin up in the air, there’s an equal chance of it landing on either heads or tails, right?”

“Yes.”

“So there is a chance that we’ll all grow apart, but there’s a bigger chance that we’ll stay friends despite the distance. We’ve got magic to take us back and forth anyway. Staying in touch will be easier than you think.”

“Well, what about your whole secret identity thing?”

“After the test, I’m going to finally show the kingdom who I am.”

Logan paused. “Wait, really?”

“Yeah, I feel like I’m finally ready to take on the responsibility of having a public image. That means I’ll need to surround myself with the right kinds of people, and you all are exactly the kinds of people I want by my side.”

“Even me? The non-noble?”

“Especially you, Logan. I mean, titles, they’re nothing more than titles. Just words that give a person a position. You, despite the position in life you were given, worked hard to become the first-ever non-noble mage. Title or no title, you are an incredible person Logan, and I’m grateful to have even met you.”

Logan searched Virgil’s face for any hint of insincerity but found none. Those stormy grey eyes held no dishonesty. Only… Fondness? Logan wasn’t good enough at understanding emotions to know exactly what Virgil was feeling, but he felt that it wasn’t anything malicious.

“Thank you, Virgil.”

“No problem. So, do you have any specific plans for what you want to do after the test?”

“Well, I wanted to open up a medical practice.”

“I thought you specialised in air magic? If you’re going into doctoring, why not take up healing magic?”

“I planned on specializing in helping people transition for an affordable price.”

“Oh? That sounds interesting.”

“It was the whole reason I got interested in studying magic. I remember that one day some people came into the bakery, talking about transitional magic. I knew then already that I wanted to do something about my body. The dysphoria was… difficult. So I looked into having someone do the spell for me, but even the cheapest of mages charged far too much for my dad or me to afford. So I took matters into my own hands and decided I would learn magic myself and help others like me to be comfortable in their own skin.”

“That’s a noble cause. It’s almost like what I wanted to do with having a magic school.”

“Oh?”

“I always felt like it was unfair that so many people missed out on the chance to use magic. Being half-fae, I was surrounded by it for my entire life. The council keeps track of who can use magic and is worthy of using it, but the only people able to use it are the rich nobles with all the access to tutors and stuff. It’s like having only certain men be knights, instead of allowing anyone who wants to fight to take up arms. There are so many people out there with the potential to be great, but because of how they were born, they will never have a chance to reach that potential.”

“You care a lot about people.”

“So do you.”

“I suppose that’s a good thing.”

The two sat silently as they ate, but the silence between them felt comfortable. However, Logan found himself once again questioning what he felt towards Virgil, whenever he glanced over at him. His heart seemed to both beat faster and sometimes skip beats altogether. Especially since they were sitting so close together at the moment. They were so close that their knees kept on brushing against each other.

"Uh, Logan?"

"Yes?"

Virgil tugged at his cape's hood. "Can I… ask you an important question?"

Logan tilted his head to the side curiously. "Sure."

"W-"

“Hey, do you two want seconds?” Remus yelled, interrupting the boy’s conversation. “Or can I have the rest?”

“Remus, if you eat all that you’ll get a stomach ache,” Patton warned.

Ignoring his boyfriend’s worry, Remus asked, “Who bets I can finish this in five minutes?”

“You’re an idiot,” Janus stated blankly.

“And a coward. Aim for three!” Roman encouraged.

Logan shook his head. “Well, hopefully, Remus’s antics are the worst things we’ll have to worry about.”

Virgil shrugged. “I’m sure we’ll be fine.”

---

The next morning, after an unpleasant wake-up call from Roman screaming, because Remus had drenched him in water, everyone got up and continued their trek to the cave where the special fruit Remy wanted, grew. Janus and Roman were taking the lead, bickering about something between themselves, with Willow, Remus and Patton walking close behind them, and Virgil and Logan tailing everyone. Willow and Remus would dash away from the group every now and again to grab flowers for Patton so that he could make them all flower crowns. Which was hard to do while walking but he seemed to be managing.

Logan noted that Virgil still seemed very tired. “Not a morning person?”

“Does staying up until five am count?”

“Wh- no! That’s actually a bit concerning. Please don’t tell me you were up until five then only slept two hours before we started walking.”

“I won’t tell you that then.”

“You need sleep, Virgil.”

“I’ll be fine. I have a bit of midnight elixir from Remy that should wake me up.”

Logan shook his head. “What on earth kept you up so late?”

Virgil shrugged. “Thoughts. My mind was feeling really busy last night. Thinking about… everything.”

“Are you worried about what’s going to happen when…” Logan trailed off.

“Kind of, but I’m sure it’ll be fine. After all, I’ve got both my parents to support me through it. Plus all of you… if the others are as accepting as you.”

“Your race won’t change how they see you, Virgil.”

“You can’t know for sure.”

“Perhaps it’s not a guarantee but the chance of them being loyal is infinitesimal.”

“So small.”

“What, no. That would be the chance of them rejecting you.”

“Then why would you say infinitesimal? It means extremely small.”

“Wait, what?”

“Y-yeah… Logan, did you not know what infinitesimal meant?”

“…”

“Oh my gods, you didn’t.”

“Don’t laugh at me! I don’t know everything and that’s perfectly normal.”

“Well, yeah, but you’re like a super genius.”

“You think I’m a genius.”

“Of course. You’ve proved it time and time again. You’re incredibly smart. In fact, the chances of you not knowing something are… infinitesimal.”

Logan glared. “How dare you use a compliment to tease me, you… sparkly-eyed jerk.”

“My eyes sparkle?”

“When you’re happy, yeah. They look kind of like stars.”

“Wow, I didn’t know you were such a romantic.”

Logan froze. “I didn’t mean to cross any boundaries-”

“You can say I have nice eyes, L. I only meant the poetic kind of romantic. I’m sure you weren’t trying to flirt. Unless you were?”

“I- uh, no. I mean you are quite attractive and I-” Logan stopped himself before he could accidentally confess anything more.

“So you do think I’m attractive at least.”

“...Yes.”

“Well, thanks. I feel the same way about you.”

Logan blushed. “O-oh… thank you...”

The rest of the walk was silent as Logan tried to calm his heart rate down. He was concerned with how fast it was going considering the casual pace they were travelling at. Subconsciously though, he knew that it was what Virgil had said that made him feel like this. He could pretend all he wanted, that there was something else wrong, but he knew that the cause of all this was his feelings towards a certain grey-eyed boy.

The fact that they had almost just flirted with each other was really not helping him. Especially since he wanted so badly to actually flirt with him. He wasn’t exactly sure of his full attraction to Virgil but he liked the idea of flirting with him. Exchanging compliments and maybe holding hands or even… kissing him? That idea made his heart skip a beat.

So basically he was having a gay panic all the way up to the cave. The one thing that distracted him from completely freezing was looking at his surroundings and categorizing all the plants he saw. Beside the cave entrance, he noted there were some berry bushes growing. Then, he saw a pebble fall from above the entrance and glanced up to see what had pushed it.

Time seemed to slow down when Logan saw the boulder perched there. It looked like it was about to fall and crush Virgil, Patton and him before they got into the cave. He grabbed Virgil’s wrist and pushed Patton ahead of them as quickly as possible to get inside of the cave before the boulder came tumbling down with a bunch of other large rocks that now sealed the entrance.

“Holy- are you guys okay?!” Willow asked.

“Pat!” Remus ran to Patton’s side immediately and helped him up.

“I’m okay, I’m okay. Logan saved us.”

Virgil stared wide-eyed at the rocks. "By Ysla’s bow, that was close. Are you alright, Logan?”

“I’m fine. Just glad I saw what was going to happen before we got squished.”

“How the hel did that even happen? There’s no way that was a coincidence,” Janus commented.

“Well, I don’t know what else it could have been. Maybe that was the big trouble that Remy was worried we’d get into,” Roman said.

“Good thing we have the porthole spell to get home then. I don’t think that there’s any way we could get back through here without it taking half an eternity,” Willow declared.

After that scare, the group continued on deeper into the cave. They knew the tree grew in a central chamber surrounded by glowing moss. There was some of this glowing moss on the walls, illuminating their path so they didn’t have to use a light spell or anything.

Soon enough, they reached the chamber. From there they just had to get the fruit from the tree, make a porthole, and go home for their after party. Except there was one problem.

A giant mole.

“I think we’re cursed.”

---

A/N: thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed this. I'll be posting two chapters a day until the full fic is up, so if you want to be tagged, you can just ask.

I'd love to hear what you thought about the chapter if you wouldn't mind commenting. Thanks again for reading! Here's hoping you have a magical day 💜

[s13e06]

Recuerdos Perdidos Pt 4

Draco Malfoy/ Female Reader

Harry Potter AU

Warnings: implied trauma

Words: 3.6K

Pt 1, Pt 2, Pt 3

-

Chapter 4

“What do you mean by a healer?” was the first question that left your mouth. Draco seemed to look at you in surprise before seeming to come to a realization.

 “Ah, well I suppose you might call them a doctor”.

You nodded slowly before his words finally began to sink in. This means that you were getting your memory back. All of it. You were finally going to be able to fill in those missing pieces. The pain in your head that never fully went away will finally begin to subside. 

“Will we have to do that magic teleportation thing to get there?” you asked beginning to get a little worried. “I really don’t want to hurl again”. You said with a little frown.

Draco only chuckled at you in amusement before shaking his head. “Don’t worry, we can take the car this time.” 

“Thank god,” you sighed before you straightened yourself up and clapped your hands together lightly. “Alright, when are we going?” 

“As soon as you’re ready to leave,” he replied calmly while giving you a quick once over. 

He had only looked you up and down for a brief moment but it was enough to cause your stomach to flutter. You were starting to get wrapped up in the fact that he was an attractive boy who you happened to be alone with. But what you were so desperately trying to remind yourself of was that he wasn’t necessarily a stranger to you. This was someone from your past. Someone who had already given you up a long time ago. He may have almost kissed you but really it may just have been because he was in a vulnerable state… then again it was the pictures that made him cry. Nothing really made sense and it was becoming increasingly harder to try and convince yourself that you didn’t care about him at all.

Because even though you had no memories of him… it was like somewhere in your mind you had missed him?

“We’re going to go at this hour?” you asked while snapping your attention back to Draco after thinking to yourself for a moment. ”Will the doctors still be taking appointments?”

You must have said something stupid because Draco just smiled again before giving you a kind of endearing look.

“Don’t worry, I’ve made a private appointment with her.” He told you while moving towards your bedroom door. “I take it you’re ready to go?”  He asked while glancing back at you.

“Yeah” you mumbled out as the anxiety began to set in. “better now than never” - The car ride to the “doctor” was a little uncomfortable, to say the least. Neither of you had said a word for the last ten minutes or so and the last thing either of you had said was a half-joking comment from him about how we were traveling there the “muggle way” for your sake. You assumed it was his attempt at trying to deliver some humor to the situation but all it did was remind you just how insane this last week had been.

You went from discovering you had repressed memories to finding out about magic all in the same day. Not to mention a past relationship and odd lingering feelings. Honestly, it was beginning to weigh down heavily on you. You turned your head to the side to glance at Draco. You thought it was kind of funny that he would be driving. Not because you didn’t think he couldn’t but just because he came off to you as the type to have their own personal chauffer. But for all, you knew he did and this was just his way of keeping others out of the situation the two of you were in.

Yes… this situation.

Come to think of it. You never really did wrap your head around the reason why he agreed to get your memories back. It was obviously important to him that you had lost them in the first place. He didn’t even have any intentions of seeing you again so why is he going along with it now? Simply because you asked? That didn’t really make sense…

If you asked would he tell you the truth?

“You’ve been staring at me for quite a while now,” Draco said briefly shifting his eyes to stare back into yours. 

 “Why are you doing this for me?” you asked hesitantly. “Didn’t you want me to forget to begin with?” confusion was etched on your features. Draco seemed to tense a little at your question. His knuckles be

gan to turn white as you watched him grip the steering wheel. “You came all this way despite losing your memories… even when I thought I’d never see you again you found your way back to me”. He began with bated breath. “Restoring your memories after you’ve come so far is the least I can do”. He finished.

You furrowed your brow as you mulled over his words. 

“Besides… once you regain them… I don’t think you’ll want to be near me again.” He added so quietly you almost thought he didn’t mean for you to hear.

“What do you mean by tha-“

“We’re here” he interrupted your questioning as he pulled the car next to a rather dingy looking building.

You decided it was better to not press him further.

As you stepped out of the car and took in the building before you doubt began to set in your stomach. The building was old and broken. The aging bricks looked as though they would crumble in any given moment, the windows were clouded and dirty, and stone steps had begun to erode in some places.

Was this really where magical doctors practiced?

You briefly worried about the state of their healthcare system. Glancing at Draco skeptically he seemed to pick up on your worry. 

“Follow me” he chuckled.

You did as you were told even though you were beginning to question this entire situation. Was it really a good idea to just hop in a car with someone who could be considered a stranger and allow him to drive you to God knows where?

Perhaps all your recent life events had impacted your judgment.

Standing behind Draco as he approached the beaten old door, you watched carefully while he briefly checked his surroundings before pulling out his magic stick and pressing it a few times against the door.

At first, you were unsure of what was supposed to be happening until a soft click noise could be heard coming from the door. Then as if it had a mind of its own, you watched the door slowly creak open to allow you two in. Draco didn’t even spare you a glance before stepping inside and you were quick to follow. 

To say that you were surprised was a complete understatement. 

One quick look around the inside and you found that your previous assumption had been way off. The floors were a sparkling polished white marble, the walls clean and neatly decorated with various paintings, tasteful plants were spotted throughout the area and as you studied them closer you found that they were rather odd in appearance, there were large brown couches for waiting on and neatly done coffee tables placed in front of them, and on those tables were various magazines and newspapers all with moving pictures on them. 

You gaped at your surroundings before you noticed that Draco was starting to walk towards what you presumed to be the reception desk. 

“Hello I have an appointment set with Ms. Snipebane” he spoke calmly.

“Of course, let me inform her that you’ve arrived” the woman behind the counter replied quickly.

As Draco stood at the counter you let your eyes wander to follow some of the people who you assumed were staff at this... was hospital the right word? They all looked very well kept and orderly. All clean clothes and nice haircuts. None of them seemed to pay you any mind either. These people belonged to a completely different world than you and yet they had no clue. 

“C’mon” you heard Draco speak next to you, breaking you out of your thoughts as he gently nudged you to follow him. 

A rather tall red-headed woman led the two of you down a narrow white hallway before making two left turns and stopping in front of a rather crisp looking door. Glancing to the side of it you read a golden plaque that was proudly placed on the wall. It gleamed, “Wanda Snipebane”.

The redhead knocked her fist sharply against the door three times before it swung open revealing a young woman. She was beautiful. A model like figure and perfect skin. You were sure you were staring because she cleared her throat and smirked at you slightly. 

“Draco, how good to see you, come in” she spoke softly as she stepped aside to let you both in. 

“Have a seat, you two” the woman spoke as she gestured to a purple leather loveseat sat adjacent to her desk. 

Sitting down quickly you couldn’t help but feel as though you were out of place. There were more odd plants sat along the windowsill and a few fuzzy books on her bookshelf. You weren’t usually one to judge the appearance of things like books. But usually, they weren’t bound in fur and scales. Looking closer you could even swear you saw one move. Hopefully, it didn’t have teeth as well you briefly mused.  

Your thoughts were interrupted by the woman clearing her voice as she sat down across from the two of you. 

“Now… quite frankly, I never thought that I’d see you in here again Mr. Malfoy” she spoke with a smile. One that read concern and not amusement. You weren’t sure why.

Glancing at Draco you saw him purse his lips. “Yes, well… as you can probably guess I’d like to pick up where we left off last time.” He spoke curtly. “This time I think that you’ll find an answer much quicker as… well, she’s here with me now” he finished while making a slight gesture towards you. 

Just then the doctor’s eyes were studying you intently as a sad sort of smile adorned her face. 

“Ahh, I thought that might be the case,” she said to you leaning slightly forward. “Tell me, dear, why do you think you’re here?”

You didn’t notice the lump in your throat before she called on you to speak but now it was as if you couldn’t swallow it. 

With a heavy sigh, you began to speak, “Well, it seems that I’ve had my memory erased. I don’t remember much of anything, just some flashes here and there. I suppose I wouldn’t have even known I was missing any memories if it wasn’t for the pain that comes with it.” 

The doctor’s eyes grew large at your words. “Pain you say?” she questioned eagerly.

“Yes, certain things seem to trigger memories but they’re hard to make out and the longer I see them the more intense the pain grows. Like a throbbing in my head that will never end.”

“And what exactly is it that triggers these random memories, if you don’t mind me asking?” 

You most certainly did mind as the topic itself was a little embarrassing in hindsight. “Not at all” however, is what you replied. “The first time it was triggered was when I found some old photos that I don’t remember taking. Except I was in them… and so was he” you spoke softer while nodding your head towards Draco. “I couldn’t make sense of it at first… how could I have pictures of memories I don’t have? Of a boy, I didn’t even know… Next thing I knew I was in an unbelievable amount of pain as brief flashes of memories started pounding in my mind”.

Ms. Snipebane looked rather enthralled in your story as she began to scribble some things down on a notepad.

“Then what did you do after that?” she asked curiously. “It’s to my understanding that you’re from and currently live in America, correct? So how did you end up here?”

The fact that she obviously knew you before you even entered this room struck you as a little unsettling but it was the least interesting of all the mysteries currently in your life, so you let it slide. 

“Well, the box I found the pictures in was full of other things from the summer I lived with my grandparent’s in England. I could even see their house in the background of one of the photos. I remembered that trip and almost everything in that box except for a few items and those photos. But I knew I wouldn’t find answers there so I packed up my things and came to my grandparent’s house. I figured it was a start to solving this mystery” you told her, beginning to relax.

“Fascinating” was all she said before her gaze shifted to Draco for just the slightest moment. 

You so desperately wanted to turn fully and see what kind of look he had on his face.

Ms. Snipebane then stood from her chair and made her way over to where the two of you sat.

“Do you mind if I check something, dear?” she asked you with a gentle smile. “Go right ahead” you replied mentally preparing yourself for whatever this magical lady was about to do.

Just as you had predicted she pulled a wand from the inside of her coat. The tip of the wand began to glow as she whispered something in Latin and raised it towards your head. You almost expected it to hurt but instead, all you felt was a little tingle.

She stared at you intensely as her wand moved about areas of your head. You glanced to the side to see Draco watching you too, a sort of fascinated look on his face.

You began to worry just what it was they were looking at when she stepped back. 

“Well” she started with a tight-lipped sort of smile “as you know, the good news is, reversing an obliviation is doable. Not to mention the fact that somehow her mind is already trying to do it for her. I’ve never seen such a thing” she noted. “And the bad news?” Draco asked looking a little tense.

“The bad news,” she said while clearing her throat lightly “Is that the process to complete a reversal is not so easy. I’ve only seen it done once before when I was studying in Australia. It might take me some time to acquire all the necessary knowledge needed to perform it.”

“When will that be?” Draco pressed; subtle irritation laced in his voice. Ms. Snipebane gave him a sort of pitiful smile before her eyes fell upon you again. “For you dear, I’ll have it ready in two weeks’ time”.

~ Draco told you to wait back in the lobby as he spoke to Ms. Snipebane about a few more things. You didn’t like the idea of them talking about you behind your back so obviously. Just because you don’t know anything about magic doesn’t mean you an idiot when it comes to everything else. 

Sitting in the lobby with all the magical folk, you couldn’t help but feel like you were secretly being watched. Like they all knew you weren’t one of them. A little voice inside your head was telling you to just get up and leave. To forget about even recovering these memories. You were perfectly fine before even discovering you’d lost them. 

Weren’t you?

“Let’s go” came Draco’s voice from beside you. The fact that you hadn’t even heard him approach you made your heart race a little in surprise. But you made no outer reaction. Instead, you just stood with a nod as you followed him out the door. 

Getting back into the car the silence quickly became too much to handle and without really thinking it through you turned to Draco and blurted out that you needed to talk. 

“Of course” was all he responded with, looking a little sheepish.

“How did she know so much about me already?” you asked letting out a little huff. “I know she didn’t say a whole lot when I was there but that’s just the problem. She didn’t ask me much because she already knew everything didn’t she?”

You were staring at Draco with a sort of stern look. Trying to appear confident and resolved. He only bit his lip slightly before glancing in the rearview mirror and cursing slightly under his breath. 

Next thing you knew he was swinging the car right in a sharp turn as he veered onto an empty street. 

You looked around a little nervously. If this didn’t look like the perfect place to hack somebody to bits then you’d be dammed. 

“I spoke about you to her when I wrote the letter arranging for the appointment. I had to tell her everything I knew about you so she’d be able to do some research ahead of time. I didn’t want her prodding you with a million questions upon first meeting. I had a feeling you might get a little overwhelmed.” Draco said while lowering his hands from the steering wheel and turning to meet your eyes.

Well, that was kind of considerate of him, you supposed. But that begged the question of why he felt he could trust her so much if his whole family hated you and the wizarding world had some sort of blood class system. 

“You obviously trust her a lot,” you said while forming the rest of your thoughts “and it was clear you knew each other well before. How were you so sure she’d be willing to help?” you asked genuinely curious. 

Draco let out a dry chuckle. “Let’s just say her forte is fixing broken people. I knew she would be willing to help me simply because I’m her favorite client.” She liked to fix broken people? Well, that explained why she’d be interested in you. But, Draco’s comment regarding himself left a heavy feeling in your chest. “Family issues?” you asked, hoping you weren’t crossing a line.

“Amongst other things” he replied.

You could tell the topic was something he wasn’t ready to share yet so you moved on from it. 

“What will you do after I regain my memory?” you questioned him, curious to know what he had been thinking the last couple of days. 

He looked a bit taken back by the question, as though he hadn’t even considered it before. 

“Well… I suppose I just assumed you’d go back home after remembering how things ended between us and I would continue with my… previous engagements.” He said trailing off a little at the end.

The statement had you puzzled. You wanted to question with these previous engagements were or even maybe who they were… but the first part was a much more pressing matter. 

“What was it that happened between us in the end? That’s the second time you’ve mentioned me leaving after finding out the truth… what did you do to me that was so horrible?” you gave him a serious look as you could tell he was starting to get uncomfortable again. “You might as well tell me now considering I’m bound to find out in a few weeks anyway.”

He seemed to consider this.

“I said things to you… in an effort to make you hate me. Things that I… can never take back” he said. 

“Did you mean them?” you asked.

“No, never” was his quick response. Looking into his steely eyes you could tell there was sincerity in them.

“Then I’ll keep that in mind” you responded before you both grew silent. With that, he started the car again and began to drive.

The rest of the ride home was quiet as you both seemed to be thinking deeply. When he dropped you back at your grandparent’s house he simply wished you a good night before driving away again. You knew there was so much left unsaid between the two of you but you figured all truths would be eventually exposed. Looking up at the dark night sky as you walked up the path to your grandparent’s house you felt incredibly small. 

You weren’t sure what time it was but you knew you were much too anxious to sleep anytime soon. 

As you neared your door you suddenly stopped. You had the most intense rush of fear rush through you out of nowhere. It was like you could feel someone watching you. 

Without giving it much thought you whipped your head to the right and stared out into the distant field. At first, you saw nothing as your eyes strained to focus in the dark. But, then you could make it out. The eerie silhouette of a woman standing in the distance, maybe only a hundred feet away. You knew in your gut it was the same woman from before. 

Terror coursed through you as you quickly started to fumble for your keys to unlock the door. In true horror movie fashion, you dropped them just as you were about to stick the key into the hole. Your hands were shaking like crazy as a thousand thoughts coursed through your mind. A voice inside your head was practically screaming for you to run. 

You bent down to pick them up and as you stood you heard a voice whisper from behind you as a chill ran down your spine.

“Care for a chat?”

____

AN:// Uh hello?!?!? I’m back from the dead you guys. I literally have no excuse for waiting this long to release this. I’ve been meaning to finish this chapter for months but today as i was driving home I was finally hit with the inspiration I needed. I have a lot in mind for this work and I hope you all see it through with me. I’m so sorry about taking like 9 months off from writing but ummm I’m back now I promise lol. Please let me know what you all think! :)

P.S a one shot may or may not be coming to you all soon.

-----

Taglist:  @screaming123 @bi-andready-tocry

[galadrieljones]

That he may hold me by the hand: chapter 8

Pairing: Arthur Morgan x Albert Mason  

Rating: Mature (Adult Themes and Situations, Violence, and Sexual Content)

Summary: After saving Albert from stumbling off a cliff in the Heartlands, Arthur invites him to Valentine for a drink. What ensues after that is a quiet love story, in which both men find themselves completely undone.

Masterpost | AO3 | Epigraph

Chapter 8: St. Denis was never enough.

“Goddam cemeteries,” said Arthur. He was loading his volcanic. It was early night, and they were creeping through the mausoleums. It had become imperative for them to play errand boys, running out grave robbers in their final push to bring Jack back. It was by far the most ridiculous bullshit with which they had ever been tasked. There was a dog barking somewhere amongst the tombstones, and they kept finding vagrants crouching here and there as if the dead could somehow keep them warm. It all made Arthur feel sick in his bones. “This place is hellish.”

“I appreciate you being here,” said John. He seemed nervous, but not by ghosts nor vagrants. He was terrified about Jack. “Seriously.”

“Of course I’m here,” said Arthur. "Don't be a moron."

“Braithwaite Manor weren’t no picnic. I still smell like smoke.”

Arthur lit a cigarette. He was smoking it and feeling dry in his throat and in his eyes. He was tired. He hadn’t slept properly in two days. “Ain’t sure what you expected.”

“Dutch is losing his mind, Arthur,” said John. “Don’t you think? I ain’t too keen on what I see.”

"I don't see much of anything no more."

“I ain’t sure how much of it I see neither. Seems an awful waste. Of a life? All this time, and running? I don’t even know what he’s talking about half the time.”

“You really ought to leave,” said Arthur, looking around. There was a sad dove singing somewhere nearby. It was creepy. Arthur swore under his breath.

“Leave and go where?” said John. He stopped, like he had got confused by his location.

“I don’t know,” said Arthur. “Anywhere. We get Jack back, and then I reckon you ought to wrangle him, Abigail, and leave. Ain't no reason to stick around no more if you don't follow.”

"What about loyalty?" John said.

Arthur said nothing of it at first. In his mind, he had traveled far from the notion of loyalty. His loyalties had changed. He didn't know what the goddam word meant anymore. "Be loyal to what matters," he said, pulling words out of his ass. But they sounded true.

John seemed pensive on this. He had stopped cold and Arthur along with him. They were officially lost, but neither of them seemed to care, or even notice. “Interesting,” said John. "Real interesting. What about you then?"

“What about me.”

“You and Albert.”

Arthur looked at him, taken off guard. John was unwavering in his resolve, gazing through the fog. “Come on,” said Arthur, ignoring the question. “Let’s get a move on.”

“You can tell me the truth,” said John, following behind. “I ain’t—I would never judge you, Arthur. Not for that.”

“For what?”

“For loving a man. It ain’t like that. And hey, maybe I’m wrong? But I’m just calling it like I see it.”

“You ain’t wrong,” said Arthur. He had the cigarette crammed between his lips. He’d started to get freaked out by the atmosphere of the cemetery, so he holstered his volcanic and opted instead for his repeater. He looked back at John who was earnest and reminding him of a dog who had wandered into a field of corn. He looked so young, thought Arthur. He looked as young as he had the day Arthur took him out that noose in Chicago. Arthur remembered how he’d had ligature bruises on his neck as if he had been dragged for a mile, and when they got him back to their camp in Putnam all the way over on the Illinois River, he did not speak for two days. It still broke Arthur up inside, to think of it.

“Arthur?”

"It’s just—” He shook his head out, to get brave. “You ain’t wrong. Okay?”

John nodded. He didn’t push nor prod. He just said, “Okay.” He seemed satisfied. “I think the place we’re looking for is just ahead.”

“Thank Jesus.”

They finished the job upright and got out clean inside twenty minutes. As they rode home, John struggled with Jack, who seemed enamored of the brief, fancy life he had lived while sequestered at Mr. Angelo Bronte’s. He talked in ecstatic, shiny terms, which intimidated John at first. Arthur mostly found it amusing, though he understood. He was relieved to have Jack back. He was relieved. He had known all along how bad it could have gone, and he had to close his eyes to shake the old fear from his heart.

It wasn’t long before they were back at Shady Belle, and the gang was celebrating Jack’s heroic rescue along with the false comeuppance of all those who had wronged them. Arthur smoked idly and stood off grooming his horse so as to avoid Dutch and even more so Hosea who was sick and getting sicker and whose love he knew to be true but constantly misguided by his thirst for the life. Arthur had never felt any such lust for anything and standing now, in the swamps of southern Lemoyne, he felt farther away from his own life and his own love than he ever had. It took him a great deal of will to finally enter their camp that night. A big haunted house in a big haunted country.

It had been four days, and Albert, in a fit of boredom and cabin fever, rode his horse out of the city and to a safe camping spot, north of Rhodes near Dewberry Creek. It had been so long since he’d slept outdoors that he was beginning to wonder if any of it had ever happened. The creek was an Arcadian dream, full of Whitetail, fox, rabbits. Scarce boar. He tracked a twelve-point buck for a while and took its picture, felt free and alone and calm. He built a fire and his tent, fished a fish in the creek, cleaned and cooked it up for his dinner in the manner taught to him by Arthur. He poured a glass of bourbon whiskey and ate as the sun went down behind the tangled tree line, feeling proud.

Before he had left St. Denis, Albert stopped at the post office where there was waiting for him a letter from his mother. He had been looking forward to her correspondence for a couple weeks now. Before he went to sleep that night, he leaned against a fallen tree trunk, sipping more of the whiskey, and he read that letter by the light of the fire. His mother’s letters were long, requiring time and commitment. They often read like opinion editorials full of immaculate grammar and journalistic observations upon her own life and his and the lives of those she deemed worthy of conversation in the high society of Philadelphia. She was a good writer, educated at Vassar College prior to marrying Albert’s father, the son of a prominent businessman from New York. She was into her mid-fifties now, living in Philadelphia, and she had been alone for many years. He worried about her, sometimes. She had always seemed a tough cookie, but knowing Arthur had tough him well that a strong armor is worth little more than the human sadness it protects.

In his last letter, Albert had told his mother of Arthur—not in a bid for her approval. He just wanted her to know.  The letter he received in return now was several pages long and full of life, but it did not mention Arthur until the very end. He smoked several cigarettes as he read, and by the time he got to the final paragraph, he was happily drunk and sat up off the fallen tree, leaning closer to the fire, for what he read would serve to change his life—

Well, dear Al, we are nearing the end of this most current exchange, and in the spirit of your previous letter, I would like to close things with a quaint proposition for you. You remember my brother, your Uncle Matthew, who recently purchased a large stake of land out on the central coast of California? Well, Matthew has taken a wife, and together they have purchased a home in San Francisco. In the wake of things, he has offered the ranch to me, free and clear. I have taken him up on his offer, of course, and plan to leave in three weeks time. As you well know, I have been aching for departure to the west for many years, and as a result will be closing up the Philadelphia estate indefinitely.

The property in California is comprised of 200 acres of terrain with water, plus a wide stable and two free-standing homes. It also holds a significant quarters for farmhands and stable boys and finds its end on a cliff that drops off into the wide, blue Pacific. I have seen photographs, and it is quite beautiful. Obviously, it is far too much for me to occupy by myself, however, and what I mean to propose is that, should you and your Arthur find yourselves in need of a home once your stretch in St. Denis comes to a close, you should pack your bags and get on a train to Monterey. Technically it is in a little place called Carmel-by-the-Sea, but you catch my meaning. I hope you’ll come. I am certain you would discover a wealth of inspiration for your work out west, Al. And Arthur as well, for I know how you mentioned he is an artist.

Please be in touch, hastily, as if the two of you plan on coming to stay, I will need to ready the property. I like to be prepared! Good luck with your opening, and remember how I love you. Give Arthur my warm regards. I do hope to meet him soon. You sound happy.

Your Loving Mother,

Cynthia

Much later, with the night winding down, Arthur stood chain-smoking on the swamp as a thunderstorm now raged over the horizon of the Lanahechee. With the adrenaline wore off, his body felt beat as he looked at the dark water ahead of him. It seemed endless and humid. Behind him there was the party, still going on and on as ticker tape. Javier played the guitar while Karen sang with Miss Grimshaw and they drank whiskey by the fire.

The colors of the world in which Arthur lived were changing, all around him. He felt sour and uncomfortable there, held up inside and anxious to unleash himself from the life to which he had been yoked for so long. Having forged a life of his own, separate from the interests of the gang, this was now all that Arthur could think about. He knew that it was selfish but he could not remember any other time in his life in which had allowed himself to entertain his own needs long enough to even register what selfishness felt like. He was bored and agitated as he looked out at the swampy river’s edge.

Mary Beth came down at some point and stood beside him, a welcome surprise. She had a pale scarf tied around her hair as if to protect from the occasional blowing rain. Arthur gave her a cigarette, lit it for her off the burning end of his own. Together they stood, looking at the lightning for a while, and smoking like old times.

“You did good, Arthur,” she said after some time. She glanced at him from behind the scarf like she was hiding part of herself. Thunder went off in the distance and shook the land. “Getting Jack back. It was a real good thing you did for John.”

“I know,” he said. “Thank you.”

“I’m supposed to tell you that Dutch wants to talk to you.” She said it half-heartedly. She did not even look at him.

Arthur said nothing.

“Anyway, John’s inside,” Mary Beth went on, smoking. “He’s with Abbie and Jack. Things seem good between them, for once.”

“I’m glad.”

“Arthur?” said Mary Beth.

He looked at her, sensing the curiosity and the concern on the edge of her voice. She wore it so often with him. They had been friends a long time. “What is it?” he said.

“I’m gonna ask you something,” she said, watching the water, “and you don’t have to answer. I won’t mind. I promise. But if you do answer, please tell me the truth. Don’t spare my feelings.”

“Go ahead, Mary Beth.”

Out on the edge of the horizon, lightning threaded the sky. The storm was moving fast. It was headed to sea.

“Mr. Mason,” she said, looking at her hands, “do you love him?”

He smoked. He finished his cigarette, tossed it to the earth and put it out with the heel of his boot. He nodded, gripping his belt, glancing to her and her freckled cheeks. “Yes,” he said.

Her breath did not catch, and she did not hesitate. She simply nodded, took a drag, and blew the smoke out in the air. “Okay,” she said.

“Mary Beth,” said Arthur.

“It’s okay,” she said. She smiled at him, through a fierce façade, as if she were trying desperately not to cry. “Please don’t apologize. I’m glad you found somebody, Arthur. Somebody decent. I surely am, as I want you to be happy. You deserve love.” She put the hair behind her ears and looked at her cigarette. “I never held no expectations for us. I know it sometimes seemed that way but I swear.”

“I know,” he said, studying her. “I know.”

“We’re friends. Ain’t we?”

“Always.”

“Good,” she said, like she was relieved. “You know I used to be filled with all these fantasies, especially when I first joined up with you boys. Knights in armor, all that. They saved my mind for many years. You always fit that bill.”

“I ain’t no knight, Mary Beth.”

“You are to me,” she said. “And I ain’t forgotten.”

“I will always protect you,” said Arthur. “Any way I can. And I am thankful for you. Taking care of me after all that nasty business, in ways that no one else would. For listening to me. You will find love, Mary Beth. If that is what you desire. I know it.”

“Thanks, Arthur.”

“You’re welcome.”

They smoked. The sky churned. “I been saving up, you know,” said Mary Beth, finishing her cigarette, throwing it into the water. She adjusted the scarf in her hair. “I got more than $800.”

“Saving up for what?” said Arthur.

“For leaving the gang,” she said, like a revelation. “It won’t be long now. I been reading a lot, about the Midwest. There are places up there I could live forever, on a much longer dime. I could get a room, with a desk. Maybe even a cabin. A place to write all these stories I been cooking up in my mind. I don’t doubt they’re terrible, but still. They’re mine. I want to make something, Arthur. I can’t do that here. Try as I been, it’s too much running, too much uncertainty.”

“I get that,” said Arthur. “And I think that’s a fine plan.”

“You should go, too,” she said, growing wistful, like she had stars in her eyes. “With Albert. He loves you. He has money. He can take you away from here. From all this. You should let him, Arthur.”

Arthur looked at her, and then he glanced back to the party where he could not see nor hear nothing but debauchery. It was a mixture of those he loved and those he no longer understood, and he knew that in time, all would draw to a close, and it would make no difference. None at all. The hour was growing late now. The night was long. He did not go to see Dutch. He breathed.

The next morning when Albert returned from his camping trip on Dewberry Creek, he opened the door to his apartment and found Arthur inside, waiting. He had been sitting on the sofa, sketching furiously, and when Albert came in, he looked up, relieved, stood and closed his journal.

“Where you been?” he said.

“Arthur,” said Albert, happily surprised. He set down his valise and his tripod, and he removed his hat. “How did you get in here?”

“I uh—I picked the lock,” said Arthur. “Sorry."

"Don't be sorry," said Albert.

"I got here late last night. You wasn't here."

“I went for a ride,” said Albert. “Don't worry. Did you find Jack? Is he okay?”

“Yes,” said Arthur. “He’s back with his family now. Thank you for asking.”

“Of course,” said Albert. “I’m relieved. It seemed so serious.”

They stood across the room from one another now, as if yet too hesitant to cross. Both of them looked at their shoes for a moment, very still in this liminal space.

At some point, Albert finally came over, and both of them sat down on the couch. Albert reached for Arthur’s hand and held it steadfastly. They looked at each other. Arthur studied Albert’s face closely and said, “So, you went for a ride, huh? You look a little windswept.”

“Yes,” said Albert. “I went out camping, just one night. Over on Dewberry Creek.”

“Dewberry Creek?” said Arthur. “That’s pretty country over there. Bold move, Mr. Mason."

“Well, we are untamed," he said, smiling to himself. "I got some wonderful shots of a twelve-point buck. I caught a fish as well.”

“You did?”

“I did.”

“Very good."

“Thank you,” said Albert. He blushed. “I got a letter from my mother yesterday.”

“That sounds nice,” said Arthur. He ran his thumb across Albert's knuckles. His whole body calm, safe. His heart was quiet. “What did she have to say?”

“A lot, actually,” said Albert.

“Oh yeah?”

The morning sun was pouring in through the windows, soaking the room and making it warm. There were some loud and joyful noises then, coming in through the wide open French doors from the bustling street outside. It sounded like a bunch of kids, getting loose, playing tag, being free.

[rationalsanskar]

Women in Their 40s Give Career Advice to Their 20-Year-Old Self

Weâre used to seeing lists of young achievers accomplishing impressive feats at such a young age. There are lists upon lists of 25 under 25, 30 under 30, celebrating these accomplishments. But what about the storied lives of women who have gone through and conquered challenges later in life? Those who have made mistakes, discovered their passion, and flourished even more when theyâve gone past a certain age. Who writes about them?

This December, we gather women in their 40s and beyond and asked them what advice theyâd give to their 20-year-old self. For the third and final installment in the series, we talk about what words of advice they would give about their career.

 Jo Ann Bitagcol, 41, Entrepreneur, photographer, model

âNot to worry much of the future or what will happen next. Just trust, enjoy the process because youâll be fine as long as youâre always 100% and your intentions are good.â

Marga Nograles, owner of Kaayo Modern Mindanao

âKeep on going, keep on searching. They say find what it is you love then focus on that, but I think at that age, you donât really know yet. So always give everything your all. Work hard, party hard. Enjoy life. Then when you find what you are most passionate about, focus and build your career on that. Ultimately though, live a life of prayer. Always lift everything up to God, and He will not ever leave you. Work with your heart and you will always be blessed.â

Mel Lozano-Alcaraz, 41, Launchpad Coworking co-founder, software project manager, and host of the Endslate Podcast

âDonât hesitate to experiment with jobs, go on paths less traveled, but at the same time, start saving and making small investments for the future. Itâs only when youâre in your 30s where youâll really get your groove, career-wise. Donât rush in your 20sâyouâll have the rest of your life to be serious.â

Lucille Dizon, turning 40, Gemologist GIA graduate, designer of Jul B. Dizon Jewellery

âNever sell yourself short. Dream big! Know what you are worth. Your success is a result of what makes you happy and motivated. Intern in an institution where thereâs opportunity to hone your skills. In early internship you can sometimes discover if itâs really the right career path for you.â

Agoo Bengzon, 43, Unilever beauty expert and Ultherapy brand ambassador

âI’d tell my 20-year-old self that there’s still so much for me to learn and discover. Don’t be in a hurry to be someone great or successful. Enjoy the ups AND downs. The downs will really help you develop grit, and grit is what will help you survive the journey. Most importantly, choose a career that you love or are passionate about. To this day, I’m still so curious about what the beauty industry has to offer. It still excites me and drives me to learn more and discover new things every day.â

Donna Cuna-Pita, 43, Writer, speaker, consultant

âWork hard and aim to have a good working relationship with the people around you. Knowing how to work well with others will help you tremendously, even more than just being very good at what you do. No matter how intelligent and hardworking you are but if nobody wants to work with you and be around you, your great ideas won’t work.â

Ruby Gan, 58, Entrepreneur

âContrary to how we were brought up, women can have a career. It is your choice if you want to stay home or work and have a career. Maintain your own account and donât feel guilty if youâre earning more than your husband. You donât have to lose yourself once married. Heck, you donât even have to follow the crowd. Find your own authentic self. Remember, the world needs non-conformists in order to move forward.â

Marcie Linao, 42, Publicity and events director

âGive your best in whatever youâre doing. There are no small jobs, just small players. When I started working in marketing, I had a boss that always played hooky. Since we had a very small team, I ended up doing most of the work that she left behind. I would go to meetings in her behalf and act as the official representative of the company. When she finally joined the meetings, some people would mistake her as my staff since I would do most of the talking since she didnât know much about the project. She eventually was let go and I was promoted to take her place even if I was pretty new in my job.

âAlways be nice to everyone. Be genuine and kind. You never know when youâll meet a certain person again and in what capacity. In my career in marketing, I have worked with a lot of people as I was starting out. We were all assistants together. We all remained friends and through the years people would change jobs and get different promotions. These people would end up being bosses in different companies and weâd sometimes get surprised when we would accidentally meet because our staff would set up meetings for us to work on different projects. Because we have a relationship already, it was pretty easy to get approvals or get sponsorship or support from them.

âLove your job. If you canât love your job, leave it. You wonât be as effective and as productive if you dread going to work every day. Find something to be grateful for so that you are motivated to wake up each morning to go to work. Maybe itâs being grateful that you have a kind boss, fun officemates, a job that allows you to wear crazy outfits to work, or maybe you have rockstar colleagues that you can learn from to develop your craft. When I was still working in publishing as the marketing and events head, I would do a full dayâs work in the office then go straight to an event that would last until the wee hours of the morning. Even if I finished work at 2 or 3 a.m., I would still go to work at 10 in the morning because there was work to be done in my other department. But since I loved seeing our concepts turning into reality and I loved working with a lot of really creative people, I didnât mind the long hours and the hard work that went with the job.

âWhenever you feel like you are failing at your job, ask yourself, what am I learning from this? We all need to fall down to learn how to ride a bike. Do not get discouraged if you keep making mistakes or you feel like you are not getting it. Sometimes the pressure of getting it right or performing is whatâs keeping you from giving your best. The fear of failure can also debilitate us. If the stress is getting to be too much, just take a step back and breathe. Sometimes all you need is a little rest to gain clarity and get back on track.

âBelieve in yourself. You have something unique and wonderful to offer to the world that is uniquely you. Stop comparing yourself with other people. They have their own skills and you have yours.

âFind a career that makes you feel alive, happy, and excited to wake up and go to work every day. No amount of money can replace the joy that you feel when you do something that you love.â

 Myrza Sison, 52, Consultant

âBe good at what you do but be versatile enough to be good at many other things, too. Always keep looking into the future to see how you can be ahead in the game. In these fast-changing days, agility and adaptability are not just assets but essential skills. Evolve or die/become a dinosaur!

âBe known for something. Develop expertise in areas you are good at or passionate about. Always be useful, fill a need, and you’ll always have work. Also, the better people skills you have, the easier it will be to work with you, and for you to work with anyone.

âThe earlier in life you learn to get along with difficult peopleâand any workplace (and the world!) is full of themâthe easier your work will be, and the more indispensable (or marketable) you will be.

âLaziness will be your downfall. It’s not always the best and the brightest who succeed and endure, but those who are willing to work harder. Put in the work. Don’t just wing it! And if you find yourself always winging it, ask yourself why. Are you not into what you’re doing? Maybe it’s not really what you want to do. Then do something else. Sure, use hacks and apply the ‘work smarter, not harder’ principle for efficiency’s sake, but do the work needed to do a good job.

âOnce you say yes to somethingâto any assignment, task, or project, no matter how menial, do your very best until you’re proud enough to have your name on it, whether or not anyone will know. You will know. Have personal standards of excellence and apply this to everything that you do. Have some prideâand shame! Shoddy work must never be associated with your name or reputation.

âNetwork, network, network. Yes, even if you are an introvert. Meeting people doesn’t just happen at parties, anyway. Be creative and be friendly! Do not underestimate the power of opportunities that can possibly come from anyone you meet. Seneca said, ‘Luck happens when preparation meets opportunity.’ When this happens, ‘being at the right place at the right time’ will actually entail being at a place outside of your house or office. Get out there. Play the field. You have nothing to lose.

âFor everything that you hate about your job, change your perspective and really analyze for each particular situation or aspect of difficulty what skills you are actually learning and can use in the future. Set learning goals for every job you take and do try to muster enough grit to hang in there until you have learned what you said you would.â

Barbi Chan, 45 years old, Makeup and microblading artist

âI would have said follow your passion, but hey, without money, there wonât be any passion. So, I guess in that aspect, you did well. You delayed your passion and was realistic enough to realize that you need funds if you want to pursue it. Good that you work for the family business first and when you saved enough, you quit and went to the States to study makeup. And the rest is history.â

Yvette Ilagan, 48, Entrepreneur

âFollow your passion. Learn from your mistakes and failures. Those are stepping stones to growth and success. Hard work is key. Keep on learning. Be humble. Always remember that God is our partner in anything we do. Ask for guidance, ask for help, and be grateful for all the blessings.

Ingrid Chua, 44, Lifestyle journalist and content producer

âNever rest on your laurels. Keep your head down, tune out the noise, and just work hard. Don’t listen to the whispers around you and just focus. Set career goalsâshort term and long termâand monitor your progress regularly. Be thirsty and stay thirsty! Be curious and learn as much as you can. Also don’t fear the unknown. Be willing to explore and discover. And when you start making money, always make sure you set aside more than half of your earnings and not spend on useless things!â

 Janina Dizon Hoschka, Jewelry designer for JANINA for Jul Dizon

âListen to your mom. Watch her interact and handle business closely. She is going to pave the way for you and your siblings one day, and you will do the same for the next generation in the future. She means well even if you think she is being too much of a disciplinarian. Understand where itâs all coming from. Check how seamlessly she handles her professional and family life because one day you will strive to do the same.â

Tweetie de Leon-Gonzalez, 52, Supermodel, designer, and health advocate

âForgive yourself for the times you stumbled and made less than stellar decisions. Chalk it up to the follies of youth. They will forever remain golden lessons you can pull out of your pocket for future crossroads. I see you losing sleep unnecessarily over such experiences. Simply understand that it is a process you need to undertake in order to face everyday challenges, minute and colossal, with wisdom and grace, which will eventually turn you into a worthy mentor to your coming children.â

Hindy Weber, 46, Fashion designer, biodynamic farmer, holistic living educator, and advocate for People & Planet

âBe fearless and unapologetic. I wasted so much time trying to please and appease peopleâand overanalyzing other peopleâs bullshit. Iâm glad those days are over but I sure wish I had started earlier.â

[ArticleReco:{“articles”:[“26902″,”24604″,”22584″,”21479”]}]

This content was originally published here.

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[lunaticobscurity]

gedo high school details! they don’t have a uniform at all, i guess since they’re such a rough school for hoodlums and ne’er-do wells! (though they don’t do drugs OR bully weaker students?)

translation by @burningrangers under the cut

text in bg: GEDO HIGH SCHOOL UNIFORMS

left: Boys' Summer Uniform This school doesn't really have any sort of uniform policy. The common style for summer is an open-necked dress shirt and school slacks. Colors and patterns are all across the board. Lately the students here prefer to look tough and manly rather than show off, so rarely will you see a student wearing flashy or jangly jewelry. Since it's an all boys' school, there's obviously no uniform for women, but then what does Akira do? Don't tell me she walks around in that tank-top and motorcycle jumper getup...

right: Boys' Winter Uniform

The base is simply a standard school uniform, but students make all kinds of modifications to it on an individual basis. Truthfully, most of these uniforms resemble the long jacket of a biker more than a school uniform. It's a world where dyes and embroidery are king. Even though students are given freedom to arrange their outfit however they like, the haramaki made out of a washbin is something exclusive to Gan. The uniform modeled here is very stylish, cool, and C*pcom-like, so it makes you want to make one yourself.

--------------------------- page 8 ---------------------------

bg: SEVEN WONDERS red text: GEDO HIGH Even if they're Gedo students, they're only human, and human nature is to spread rumors. The students at Gedo have managed to throw together their own version of the Seven Wonders. They're not really "wonders" as much as insights into the character of the students there, but what can you do? Give them some slack and read along with a generous heart.

#1: The Mystery of a Clean School!? Even though you'd expect a school for delinquents to be full of stuff like alcohol, cigarettes, and thinner, you don't see any of that at Gedo High. (No one knows whether they just use them when no one's watching, or if they abstain from substances due to their adverse health effects.) Perhaps they're worried that such petty acts would be a disgrace to the school's tough and manly image?

#2: Chivalrous Spirit!? A Peaceful School!? You'll never see students getting bullied or shaken down for lunch money in the school halls. (Perhaps the spirit of chivalry is alive and well at Gedo?). Despite the fact that Gedo is a school for delinquents, hazing and extortion don't seem to occur here. One would suppose that they view such acts as below them.

#3: Heartful Gedo There's a little shop called Yamabuki nearby the school, but they've never had a problem with shoplifting. The students have a soft spot for the little old lady who runs the store, so everyone makes sure to pay for their goods. The students also make sure to be on their best behavior around her. I'll bet that she thinks that they're all good little star students!

speech bubble in comic panel: Tch.

#4: When Gedo Gets Fired Up!? When it comes to ball games, no one gets more heated than the students at Gedo! Of course, no matter who you are, when it comes to winning or losing a competition, it's always more satisfying to win. At matches versus other schools especially, the mood changes drastically, and both teams get so pumped with fighting spirit that they duke it out until they can no longer stand. If only they could be as serious about their studies...

#5: Rivals Don't Get Off Easy! Apparently, Gedo students can spot a student from their rival school, Gorin, even if they're in their casual clothes! If by chance they encounter another student while walking around town, strangely, they'll always be able to recognize that they're from another school. Since Gorin students are headstrong and hate to lose, if they catch sight of each other, a fight is bound to break out.

subtitle: Gorin is on another level, man! Inside their little hearts is a whole lot of crazed emotion (heart)

#6: Gedo in the Throes of Passion!? Since it's an all boy's school, girls are naturally somewhat of a touchy subject. Every student there is starved for female contact. Even if they think of themselves as tough guys, they are boys around that age... Each of them has the modest dream of walking hand-in-hand with a woman. If Akira's gender was found out, who knows what kind of chaos would break out?

subtitle: At an industrial school, and one that has nearly no female students, the few girls there would likely be fighting off boys with a stick...

#7: Even The Infamous Gedo Has Compassion!? All the students, no matter who, seem to really like Gedo. Of course, they have their fair share of complaints as students do, but they seem to have a lot of reverence for their alma mater. Even these rowdy and confrontational students have a mysterious solidarity that they hold very close. It's a school full of birds of a feather, so their compassion for each other is nigh-unshakable.

subtitle: Many people mistake this school as closed down. However, the spirit of compassion is alive and well here.

[rationalsanskar]

Women in Their 40s Give Career Advice to Their 20-Year-Old Self

Weâre used to seeing lists of young achievers accomplishing impressive feats at such a young age. There are lists upon lists of 25 under 25, 30 under 30, celebrating these accomplishments. But what about the storied lives of women who have gone through and conquered challenges later in life? Those who have made mistakes, discovered their passion, and flourished even more when theyâve gone past a certain age. Who writes about them?

This December, we gather women in their 40s and beyond and asked them what advice theyâd give to their 20-year-old self. For the third and final installment in the series, we talk about what words of advice they would give about their career.

 Jo Ann Bitagcol, 41, Entrepreneur, photographer, model

âNot to worry much of the future or what will happen next. Just trust, enjoy the process because youâll be fine as long as youâre always 100% and your intentions are good.â

Marga Nograles, owner of Kaayo Modern Mindanao

âKeep on going, keep on searching. They say find what it is you love then focus on that, but I think at that age, you donât really know yet. So always give everything your all. Work hard, party hard. Enjoy life. Then when you find what you are most passionate about, focus and build your career on that. Ultimately though, live a life of prayer. Always lift everything up to God, and He will not ever leave you. Work with your heart and you will always be blessed.â

Mel Lozano-Alcaraz, 41, Launchpad Coworking co-founder, software project manager, and host of the Endslate Podcast

âDonât hesitate to experiment with jobs, go on paths less traveled, but at the same time, start saving and making small investments for the future. Itâs only when youâre in your 30s where youâll really get your groove, career-wise. Donât rush in your 20sâyouâll have the rest of your life to be serious.â

Lucille Dizon, turning 40, Gemologist GIA graduate, designer of Jul B. Dizon Jewellery

âNever sell yourself short. Dream big! Know what you are worth. Your success is a result of what makes you happy and motivated. Intern in an institution where thereâs opportunity to hone your skills. In early internship you can sometimes discover if itâs really the right career path for you.â

Agoo Bengzon, 43, Unilever beauty expert and Ultherapy brand ambassador

âI’d tell my 20-year-old self that there’s still so much for me to learn and discover. Don’t be in a hurry to be someone great or successful. Enjoy the ups AND downs. The downs will really help you develop grit, and grit is what will help you survive the journey. Most importantly, choose a career that you love or are passionate about. To this day, I’m still so curious about what the beauty industry has to offer. It still excites me and drives me to learn more and discover new things every day.â

Donna Cuna-Pita, 43, Writer, speaker, consultant

âWork hard and aim to have a good working relationship with the people around you. Knowing how to work well with others will help you tremendously, even more than just being very good at what you do. No matter how intelligent and hardworking you are but if nobody wants to work with you and be around you, your great ideas won’t work.â

Ruby Gan, 58, Entrepreneur

âContrary to how we were brought up, women can have a career. It is your choice if you want to stay home or work and have a career. Maintain your own account and donât feel guilty if youâre earning more than your husband. You donât have to lose yourself once married. Heck, you donât even have to follow the crowd. Find your own authentic self. Remember, the world needs non-conformists in order to move forward.â

Marcie Linao, 42, Publicity and events director

âGive your best in whatever youâre doing. There are no small jobs, just small players. When I started working in marketing, I had a boss that always played hooky. Since we had a very small team, I ended up doing most of the work that she left behind. I would go to meetings in her behalf and act as the official representative of the company. When she finally joined the meetings, some people would mistake her as my staff since I would do most of the talking since she didnât know much about the project. She eventually was let go and I was promoted to take her place even if I was pretty new in my job.

âAlways be nice to everyone. Be genuine and kind. You never know when youâll meet a certain person again and in what capacity. In my career in marketing, I have worked with a lot of people as I was starting out. We were all assistants together. We all remained friends and through the years people would change jobs and get different promotions. These people would end up being bosses in different companies and weâd sometimes get surprised when we would accidentally meet because our staff would set up meetings for us to work on different projects. Because we have a relationship already, it was pretty easy to get approvals or get sponsorship or support from them.

âLove your job. If you canât love your job, leave it. You wonât be as effective and as productive if you dread going to work every day. Find something to be grateful for so that you are motivated to wake up each morning to go to work. Maybe itâs being grateful that you have a kind boss, fun officemates, a job that allows you to wear crazy outfits to work, or maybe you have rockstar colleagues that you can learn from to develop your craft. When I was still working in publishing as the marketing and events head, I would do a full dayâs work in the office then go straight to an event that would last until the wee hours of the morning. Even if I finished work at 2 or 3 a.m., I would still go to work at 10 in the morning because there was work to be done in my other department. But since I loved seeing our concepts turning into reality and I loved working with a lot of really creative people, I didnât mind the long hours and the hard work that went with the job.

âWhenever you feel like you are failing at your job, ask yourself, what am I learning from this? We all need to fall down to learn how to ride a bike. Do not get discouraged if you keep making mistakes or you feel like you are not getting it. Sometimes the pressure of getting it right or performing is whatâs keeping you from giving your best. The fear of failure can also debilitate us. If the stress is getting to be too much, just take a step back and breathe. Sometimes all you need is a little rest to gain clarity and get back on track.

âBelieve in yourself. You have something unique and wonderful to offer to the world that is uniquely you. Stop comparing yourself with other people. They have their own skills and you have yours.

âFind a career that makes you feel alive, happy, and excited to wake up and go to work every day. No amount of money can replace the joy that you feel when you do something that you love.â

 Myrza Sison, 52, Consultant

âBe good at what you do but be versatile enough to be good at many other things, too. Always keep looking into the future to see how you can be ahead in the game. In these fast-changing days, agility and adaptability are not just assets but essential skills. Evolve or die/become a dinosaur!

âBe known for something. Develop expertise in areas you are good at or passionate about. Always be useful, fill a need, and you’ll always have work. Also, the better people skills you have, the easier it will be to work with you, and for you to work with anyone.

âThe earlier in life you learn to get along with difficult peopleâand any workplace (and the world!) is full of themâthe easier your work will be, and the more indispensable (or marketable) you will be.

âLaziness will be your downfall. It’s not always the best and the brightest who succeed and endure, but those who are willing to work harder. Put in the work. Don’t just wing it! And if you find yourself always winging it, ask yourself why. Are you not into what you’re doing? Maybe it’s not really what you want to do. Then do something else. Sure, use hacks and apply the ‘work smarter, not harder’ principle for efficiency’s sake, but do the work needed to do a good job.

âOnce you say yes to somethingâto any assignment, task, or project, no matter how menial, do your very best until you’re proud enough to have your name on it, whether or not anyone will know. You will know. Have personal standards of excellence and apply this to everything that you do. Have some prideâand shame! Shoddy work must never be associated with your name or reputation.

âNetwork, network, network. Yes, even if you are an introvert. Meeting people doesn’t just happen at parties, anyway. Be creative and be friendly! Do not underestimate the power of opportunities that can possibly come from anyone you meet. Seneca said, ‘Luck happens when preparation meets opportunity.’ When this happens, ‘being at the right place at the right time’ will actually entail being at a place outside of your house or office. Get out there. Play the field. You have nothing to lose.

âFor everything that you hate about your job, change your perspective and really analyze for each particular situation or aspect of difficulty what skills you are actually learning and can use in the future. Set learning goals for every job you take and do try to muster enough grit to hang in there until you have learned what you said you would.â

Barbi Chan, 45 years old, Makeup and microblading artist

âI would have said follow your passion, but hey, without money, there wonât be any passion. So, I guess in that aspect, you did well. You delayed your passion and was realistic enough to realize that you need funds if you want to pursue it. Good that you work for the family business first and when you saved enough, you quit and went to the States to study makeup. And the rest is history.â

Yvette Ilagan, 48, Entrepreneur

âFollow your passion. Learn from your mistakes and failures. Those are stepping stones to growth and success. Hard work is key. Keep on learning. Be humble. Always remember that God is our partner in anything we do. Ask for guidance, ask for help, and be grateful for all the blessings.

Ingrid Chua, 44, Lifestyle journalist and content producer

âNever rest on your laurels. Keep your head down, tune out the noise, and just work hard. Don’t listen to the whispers around you and just focus. Set career goalsâshort term and long termâand monitor your progress regularly. Be thirsty and stay thirsty! Be curious and learn as much as you can. Also don’t fear the unknown. Be willing to explore and discover. And when you start making money, always make sure you set aside more than half of your earnings and not spend on useless things!â

 Janina Dizon Hoschka, Jewelry designer for JANINA for Jul Dizon

âListen to your mom. Watch her interact and handle business closely. She is going to pave the way for you and your siblings one day, and you will do the same for the next generation in the future. She means well even if you think she is being too much of a disciplinarian. Understand where itâs all coming from. Check how seamlessly she handles her professional and family life because one day you will strive to do the same.â

Tweetie de Leon-Gonzalez, 52, Supermodel, designer, and health advocate

âForgive yourself for the times you stumbled and made less than stellar decisions. Chalk it up to the follies of youth. They will forever remain golden lessons you can pull out of your pocket for future crossroads. I see you losing sleep unnecessarily over such experiences. Simply understand that it is a process you need to undertake in order to face everyday challenges, minute and colossal, with wisdom and grace, which will eventually turn you into a worthy mentor to your coming children.â

Hindy Weber, 46, Fashion designer, biodynamic farmer, holistic living educator, and advocate for People & Planet

âBe fearless and unapologetic. I wasted so much time trying to please and appease peopleâand overanalyzing other peopleâs bullshit. Iâm glad those days are over but I sure wish I had started earlier.â

[ArticleReco:{“articles”:[“26902″,”24604″,”22584″,”21479”]}]

This content was originally published here.

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