#Disaster Gay

[puzzled-on-main]

my one coworker: *expresses genuine interest in talking to me*

me, instantly: what are we

[neopronouns]

flag id: the top left flag has 6 stripes which, in order, are dark red, red-orange, light yellow-orange, yellow-green, dark faded blue, and very dark purple-grey. the top right flag has 5 stripes which, in order, are red-orange, orange, very light grey, orangish-red, and dark red.

the bottom left flag has 5 stripes which, in order, are yellow-green, light yellow-green, very light grey, dull blue, and dark faded blue. the bottom right flag has 3 stripes, with the second being half the size of the rest. in order, they are orangish-red, very dark purple-grey, and dark faded blue. end id.

banner id: a 1500x150 teal banner with the words ‘please read my dni before interacting’ in large white text in the center. end id.

rainbow | lesbian gay man | bi

disaster flags for 🍒 anon! they're meant to look like fire, nuclear radiation, floodwater, etc. - literal disasters.

dni link

[raine-kai]

Novel Wen Ziduan Has Issues

As you might know if you have seen anything I have posted here or written lately or talked about in the past month or so, I like Third Prince, or Wen Ziduan, from Love Like the Galaxy quite a lot.

What you might not know is that even though I liked him before I read the book, based on the drama alone, I like him even more that I read the book.

Let me be clear: novel Ziduan is a disaster.

For one thing, Yuan Shanjian's tendency to neg Shaoshang at every possible opportunity? That was Ziduan in the book. YSJ is a lot less directly offensive in his behavior toward Shaoshang, which makes him a lot more likable in the book. They still argue a lot, but he doesn't go out of his way to try to make her feel bad about herself. Meanwhlie, Ziduan only goes through one scene where he outright starts negging Shaoshang in the drama—and to be fair, this is episode 49 and he was having a really bad day that day, after having had a terrible day the day before as well—and she tells him off pretty well for it. He has a reason to talk to her that day, but otherwise he seems to mostly ignore her, or roll with whatever else is going on in the scene. Ziduan in the drama comes off as a foil of sorts to Shaoshang. They both care deeply for Huo Buyi, but while Ziduan has power in theory, he can do nothing to help Huo Buyi and is losing his mind (he behaves more erratically, more angrily and snappishly in that episode than we ever see him before or after) after the revenge. Shaoshang might not have power, but she has the keys to exonerating Huo Buyi, and she is exceedingly quiet and calm as she makes her case—both to Ziduan for her right to personhood, and to the court for Huo Buyi. By the end of this scene, we see Shaoshang share a warning with Ziduan, who bows to her and promises to bring Zisheng back, and make him apologize to her.

This is a far cry from the behavior of novel Ziduan, who takes every possible opportunity to point out how inferior Shaoshang is, especially relative to Zisheng.

He does eventually come to terms with the fact that Shaoshang and Zisheng are going to be together, in his own way... But not before being absolutely delighted to betroth Shaoshang to Yuan Shanjian, only to be deeply upset when Zisheng returns and wants her back. There's a whole scene where he demands to know why nobody told him that he would want her back, and rants about how poor of a match Shaoshang is for Zisheng, who deserves the best...even though he is just as dumb as she is, he admits toward the end.

I cannot articulate enough how much novel Ziduan comes across like a comphet gay boy trying to justify why he's mad that his best friend is dating someone by making it the girl's fault. Somehow.

I ship OT3 in the world of the drama, but I don't see how that could work in the novel world unless ZIduan does one hell of a lot of soulsearching.

The other day, I found the novel extras, and there was one for Ziduan, and OH BOY, I did not think this shit could get even funnier.

First off, this man is a misogynistic mess from the moment we get into his head. He says there are two kinds of women: virtuous and unvirtuous. And then he proceeds to list all the women in his life as various shades of unvirtuous. Empress Xuan? Very unvirtuous. His mother, Consort Yue? Extremely unvirtuous. His aunts and sisters? Never heard of the word virtue in their lives—except Second Sister, she's ok. (I have to assume this assessment is pre-time skip, because post time-skip Second Princess had apparently become less ladylike or something.) Xiao Yuanyi is also ok. Cheng Shaoshang is just the absolute worst.

So he sort of...has to approve of their betrothal (again) because it's what will make Huo Buyi happy and as we know, Ziduan really just wants Huo Buyi to be happy. (Although in this universe it's buried underneath so much negative vibes directed at Shaoshang that it can be easy to forget that.)

Shaoshang comes to talk to him, and she uses flattery over his dedication to justice over family (a love language between all 3 of them, I swear) to undercut his usual pattern of berating her. It works, until she's about to leave.

And then this happens:

The prince was very moved, and his tone could not help softening: "I am not afraid of being criticized by others, but only hope that the people of the world will live and work in peace and contentment, free from natural disasters and man-made disasters, so I will live up to the trust of the ancestors."

Originally, he wanted to scold the girl, but at this moment, the crown prince could not swear much, so he simply waved his hand: "Forget it, you can go back, take a good rest, and serve Zisheng carefully after marriage. Sigh, Over the years, Zisheng has really suffered a lot, you, you should treat him better."

Shaoshang agreed sincerely, and hurried out of the door. When she reached the courtyard, the prince suddenly called her to stop. Shaoshang looked back in a daze, and saw the prince raised his right hand, and then her shoulder hurt slightly, and when she looked down, it turned out to be a small stone. She was tongue-tied, and looked at the prince in disbelief—he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he actually threw stones at herself! The majestic crown prince actually threw stones at her!

The prince's brows and eyes are firm and resolute, and the perennial solemnity is swept away, as if he is ten years younger and suddenly returned to his naughty and troubled boyhood. He laughed heartily: "Okay, let's settle the matter now, you can go back and happily prepare for marriage!"

Shaoshang stamped her feet angrily, turned her head and left.

HE THREW A ROCK AT HER.

HE THREW A ROCK AT HER AND WAS HAPPY ABOUT IT.

And then after this scene, Ziduan's immediately thinking to himself about how he has to double their wedding gifts and hope they have a daughter he can marry to a son of his own.

THE AMOUNT OF DISASTER GAY ENERGY HERE IS STAGGERING.

Oh, about his wife--he does have a concubine. A cousin of his, selected by his uncle. He agreed to marry her because his uncle said so, and then the moment he stopped and thought about it, he realized how unvirtuous his wife is. She actually wants him to LIKE her, the gall of her!

Anyway, this man is a complete trainwreck and I adore it.

Mostly because the drama version exists as essentially a fix-it.

Speaking of which, who was it who decided to take Ziduan's "you-stole-the-man-I-am-not-aware-I'm-in-love-with-and-I'm-mad-about-it" energy and dropped it onto Yuan Shanjian, of all people? He's actually supposed to like Shaoshang... That might be the strangest adaptation decision, imo 😂😂😂

[sketchy--akechi]

what about the time he texts you "im alone right now" wtf was up with THAT

akechi saw that "come over" "i cant im busy" "my parents arent home" meme and decided to try it out on akira

[disaster-theysbian]

"Do you like apples or bananas?"

"Apples".

"Why, have you never tried a banana?"

"Not that it's any of your business but yes. I still like apples."

"So you don't eat bananas any more?"

"No."

"Did you have a bad experience with bananas?"

"Yes, I had to pretend to like them for 26 years to avoid the conversation we are currently having.

"... would you like to try my-"

"NO I WOULD NOT. FUCK OFF."

[fansykiltentragedry]

So fuckin angry rn !!!

So I'm totally in love with this girl, she's my type down to a T, BUT SHE'S STRAIGHT!!!

OMFG !!!!?! ik this is like the millionth (fr) time this is happening but just

UGHHHH

to add some spice, she's got a crush

fml fr

[vizthedatum]

Simu Liu as Ken

*absolutely no words*

*fully in disaster gay mode*

[shroomwar]

help help fuck fuck fuck a girl just told me her friend said her and i have chemistry and i panicked and said i hate science fuck fuck fuck

[shivering-isles-cryptid]

I absolutely hate being pale as hell because when I blush, I BLUSH. Today this guy said I had really nice eyes, and my entire body decided to do its best to turn me into Vision from the Wandavision Halloween special where Vision was cosplaying as Vision

[chikita-warriornumb]

im getting myself a girlfriend again if Netflix decided to renew Warrior Nun

[randombubs]

Han acting as though he hasn’t lost Ben before-

Leia, peacefully sleeping, snuggled against her himbo husband: 😌

Leia's comm: "LEIA I HAVE LOST THE BABY! I THINK HE AND ARTOO STOLE MY XWING!!!! LEIA WHAT DO I DO!! HOW DO YOU LOSE A WHOLE BABY? YODA STOP LAUGHING AT ME THIS IS SERIOUS! LEIAAAAAAAAAAA! THIS IS A DISASTER THE MANDOLORIAN IS NEVER GOING TO KISS ME WITH HIS MOUSTACHE NOW!!"

Han: "...I want a new brother-in-law"

[opticsimon]

i love wearing my very well crafter disaster gay persona just to hide my more disastrous and (somehow) more gay actual self

[stonelions]

i was thinking the other day how we tend to draw cas and dean (correctly tbh) like

but in doing so we are betraying another fundamental dynamic of theirs which is more like,

[mytortoisegotstuckinatupperware]

its really me and my 539297 disaster gays against the world huh

[disaster-theysbian]

Don't think I ever told the story of the time I did the most useless lesbian thing ever.

My fiancée (then friend) and I were hanging out at my place (a shared house). We had been crushing on each other for months and our mutual friends were ready to knock our heads together.

We were talking about friendship etc. And warm fuzzy feelings. I thought it would be a good moment to tell her.

So I looked her deeply in the eyes, took a deep breath, and said:

"I suppose what I'm trying to say... is..."

~*GAY PANIC*~

"I value your friendship!"

There was a pause, she went "aww, I value your friendship too!" But I could tell she was a bit put out. She'd *hoped* I was going to say the other thing. And I fucked up.

I called my Gayrents as soon as she left and wailed "I FRIENDZONED MYSELF WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO???"

[magic-cricketbat]

“why does charles sit on the desk when there are clearly other chairs in the office—”

because he’s bisexual that’s why