#Dentists Bracknell

[begreatday]

What is the Difference between invisible Braces and Invisalign Compared with Braces that are normally used?

What is the Difference between invisible Braces and Invisalign Compared with Braces that are normally used?

Invisalign is a term that has recently become the most popular braces brand and alignment. In fact, many people have expressed their interest in the invisible braces or clear braces that are developed and produced by Invisalign and are available through a number of approved Invisalign NHS across the country. No matter if you’ve been aware of Invisalign, the concept of invisible braces is likely…

[janetwatson-blog1]

Dentists Bracknell, Berkshire: Glenmore dental practice provide the full range of dental treatments including emergency dentists. Oral Dental surgery in Bracknell, Berkshire. Cosmetic dentist, orthodontist, teeth whitening, root canal treatments and much more.

[johnreynolds162-blog]

Dentists Bracknell, Berkshire: Glenmore dental practice provide the full range of dental treatments including emergency dentists. Oral Dental surgery in Bracknell, Berkshire. Cosmetic dentist, orthodontist, teeth whitening, root canal treatments and much more.

[harismartan22]

Dentists Bracknell, Berkshire: Glenmore dental practice provide the full range of dental treatments including emergency dentists. Oral Dental surgery in Bracknell, Berkshire. Cosmetic dentist, orthodontist, teeth whitening, root canal treatments and much more.

[skyeruth-blog]

Dentists Bracknell, Berkshire: Glenmore dental practice provide the full range of dental treatments including emergency dentists. Oral Dental surgery in Bracknell, Berkshire. Cosmetic dentist, orthodontist, teeth whitening, root canal treatments and much more.

[braintrain32]

What Are The Most Effective Teeth Whitening Alternatives?

laser teeth whitening ampthill blog content from lateethwhitening.co.uk To Whiten Your Teeth

Content

Shop Teeth Whitening.

Why More Than The Counter Kits A Lot Less Costly?

Oral Health Education.

Keep A Great Oral Hygiene Routine Up.

Exactly How To Obtain White Teeth: 4 Top Suggestions To Achieve A Brighter Smile

If you seek something that's created by those aware-- i.e. dental experts-- yet at the very same time entirely natural, this little pot creates a great acquisition. Don't be postponed the black powder that looks as though it will have the exact contrary impact of whitening your teeth. By dipping your brush into the powder as well as utilizing it like tooth paste, you only need to wait a number of weeks for it to work. You won't obtain professional looking results, yet it does eliminate spots better than with whitening toothpaste and also mouth wash. On the drawback, it's actually messy and also can obtain stuck on and in between your teeth.

How Long Does Teeth Whitening Last? Duration, Side Effects, and More - Healthline

How Long Does Teeth Whitening Last? Duration, Side Effects, and More.

Posted: Tue, 26 Jan 2021 08:00:00 GMT [source]

Do not be upset by the black frothing at the mouth when you utilize it as it leaves your mouth feeling actually clean, with a fresh, ever-so-slightly sticking around preference. For blog content by lateethwhitening.co.uk on teeth whitening bracknell , we trialled one of the most prominent whitening kits to the test to find out if they are a quick as well as cost effective way to get brighter teeth as well as transform your smile for less. We have actually likewise rounded up the best whitening toothpastes that you can purchase too. Sihra makes clear, "Whitening tooth pastes include representatives and also abrasives that brighten teeth and also assist dissolve any kind of stains".

Shop Teeth Whitening.

Teeth whitening products aim to remove surface area stains on the tooth and penetrate the enamel, to break down the discoloured particles within. The options made use of in teeth whitening kits often contain whitening active ingredients such as carbamide peroxide or hydrogen peroxide as an energetic component, which can permeate the enamel. Also unlike other teeth whitening tooth pastes, it does not dry the mouth. It's most likely the priciest toothpaste you'll buy in your life, however it's a whole lot less expensive than several of the gel sets and also we located whiter teeth after just a few days.

In the UK, teeth whitening packages can be gotten over-the-counter supplying they contain much less than 0.1% hydrogen peroxide, to guarantee they are safe for usage according to EU policies. They generally aren't as solid as professional whitening, as a qualified dentist can legitimately consume to 6% hydrogen peroxide. Whitening kits having carbamide peroxide can consume to 16% of this active ingredient. From teeth whitening strips to charcoal tooth pastes as well as LED lights, here are the most effective teeth whiteners to prep your smile for your wedding event snaps. One of the most common products of this type consist of tooth pastes that "effectively whiten teeth" as well as tooth whitening strips-- sticky items of plastic that you keep on your teeth for certain time periods.

Why Are Over The Counter Packages So Much Less Expensive?

It really did not fairly meet the greater end of the forecasted outcomes however with extra training courses of therapy we think we could have certainly got there. Top-up doses of gel currently cost ₤ 17.99 and also are as vegan-friendly as the major set. teeth whitening biggleswade will not work as efficiently or instantly as professional treatments yet they are even more economical. The LED light comfortably changes itself off after the 16-minute treatment time. Our testers located it straightforward to make use of as well as noticed that teeth were whiter after four days. They also said there was little to no gum or tooth level of sensitivity activated by this package.

The best at-home teeth whitening products, according to dentists - NBC News

The best at-home teeth whitening products, according to dentists.

Posted: Thu, 14 Jan 2021 08:00:00 GMT [source]

Some beauty parlors supply teeth whitening, yet this isn't lawful if not done by a dental professional. If you wish to have actually the procedure done properly, most likely to a certified oral professional such as a dental practitioner or hygienist. If you have any doubts, the NHS suggests checking out a dental practitioner to discuss your options. While the majority of teeth whitening products call for a minimum of 14 days make use of, this package guarantees results in less than half that time. 6 doses of gel are used over the teeth before placing on the mouth tray-- which is affixed to an LED light-- for 15 mins at a time. While there was no prompt distinction, our teeth were brighter as well as whiter after four consecutive days of usage.

Dental Health Education And Learning.

They particularly target the enamel, the outer safety layer of your teeth to lighten or remove surface area stains. These whitening strips are developed to minimize the look of tough discolorations that have developed with time. Its active key-ingredient is hydrogen peroxide, which passes through the top layer of the enamel to lighten up teeth. Testers located the strips easy to make use of and also much less messy than a lot of various other packages. They likewise claimed they really did not experience tooth or gum level of sensitivity after using it. Utilizing teeth whitening packages at home is secure and lawful, giving your components do not exceed the optimum portion permitted. It deserves consulting your dental professional before starting a therapy, and do not take any type of threats with products that look less than professional.

[congadrug29]

How Much Does Teeth Whitening Expense?

Teeth Whitening Packages Uk

Content

Mr Blanc Minty Fresh Teeth Whitening Strips

Should I Purchase Stronger Over-the-counter Whitening Therapies From The Us?

What About Professional Teeth Whitening Solutions?

Do Teeth Whitening Lights Truly Function?

Strawberry And Cooking Soda.

For an instant change whitening can be accomplished in the oral surgery within a hr, encourages Mr Williams. Whatever therapy you utilize, there is always a chance that your teeth as well as periodontals can be conscious the chemicals used-- especially if you already experience delicate teeth. The dental professional will certainly inspect that your teeth are healthy and balanced and also suitable to continue, whilst additionally reviewing your expectations. If you more than happy to continue, the dental professional will initially take a perception of the teeth. Teeth whitening can not make your teeth brilliant white, but it can lighten the existing colour by a number of shades, describes professional supervisor Steve Williams at Mydentist.

Maintain whitening results with the world's very first vitamin enriched whitening toothpaste; containing vitamins A, B6 as well as C for general gum as well as oral wellness.

A 5-point LED accelerating light is affixed to the mouth tray to start the whitening process of approximately 20 mins.

In a facility, yes-- LED light therapy can properly whiten your teeth.

Colgate's latest whitening tooth paste is their best yet, as well as removes yellowing stains for an immediately brighter smile.

This Luster kit utilizes paint on whitening gel and a double activity light to reverse yellowing results on your teeth.

Unlike extrinsic discolorations, these kinds of stains are less most likely to respond to oral whitening because the stain is inside the tooth rather than externally where it is easier to get to. Intrinsic spots refer to spots that create within the tooth itself. These kinds of stains are generally a result of injury or exposure to high levels of fluoride and also tetracycline prescription antibiotics while your teeth were still creating.

Mr https://www.lateethwhitening.co.uk/laser/bracknell/berkshire/ Whitening Strips

If you are a cigarette smoker or like red wine and also other foods and also drinks, like coffee, that is susceptible to stain your teeth, it is a great concept to do adhere to up sessions with your dentist. Whitening the term 'laser teeth whitening farnborough' and also strips are very popular but at the end of the year, you will certainly have invested the same quantity of not more on the residence sets in any case. Ageing, foods and also drinks, and also smoking cigarettes can all have a negative impact on our teeth and also leave them tarnished and yellow.

If your objective is a brighter, whiter smile, please do not think twice to enter contact with us. You can call or send out an email to to speak to a participant of our team about the variety of solutions and also the five star care we supply. If you are taking into consideration having your teeth whitened yet are stressed over just how much it will cost, Revitalise Dental Centre gets on hand to help. We offer a series of economical person financing plans, aiding you pay for your dream smile in manageable month-to-month instalments. Utilizing the sophisticated innovation at Revitalise Dental Centre we can colour match your veneers or crowns permitting them to assimilate with your all-natural teeth. Taking place within the dentin, or the internal layer, of a tooth, inherent stains are much more challenging to deal with as well as are a more permanent tarnish.

Should I Get More Powerful Over-the-counter Whitening Therapies From The Us?

The influence of having actually dark discolored teeth contrasted to white teeth can expand far beyond self-worth. Home whitening is additionally supplied as a top-up after whitening at the Practice. The home kits are not as reliable as they are unregulated so it's hard to understand precisely what you are putting on your teeth, Mr Williams explains. Some home packages contain very high levels of whitening product, which can also cause burns. To learn if a dental professional is registered with the GDC you can examine online or call. You can commonly after that buy the suitable stamina of tooth lightening agent from your dental expert to make use of for meticulously guided top ups in your home, your dental practitioner will suggest you just how commonly is safe.

If you do experience periodontal illness or tooth decay, these have to be dealt with first before starting any whitening process. At your first session, a mould will be taken of your teeth and also sent out to the research laboratory where a tray will certainly be developed that is developed to fit flawlessly within your mouth. By developing bespoke what is laser teeth whitening henlow? - lateethwhitening (guide to keyword) for your teeth, you can feel confident that they will certainly not slide or aggravate your gum tissues as well as will certainly be comfortable to put on as well as easy to make use of. Teeth can come to be discoloured for several factors, however what you drink and eat are without a doubt the most significant elements impacting adjustments in tooth colour.

What About Professional Teeth Whitening Services?

You then apply a gel with a bleaching agent in the trays which you use in your home for a prescribed amount of time for a couple of days till you achieve the outcome you want. Allow's look at what to think about, as well as what to prevent-- with advice directly from our dental professionals.

If you are simply after the elimination of spots, it's best to have an appointment with a hygienist and benefit from having your oral health and wellness cared for. Veneers are a lifetime commitment, typically once a patient has veneers they will certainly need future dentistry to maintain them. The sort of material that can be made use of depends on the complexity of the therapy and your current oral health and wellness.

[johnreynolds162-blog]

Dentists Bracknell, Berkshire: Glenmore dental practice provide the full range of dental treatments including emergency dentists. Oral Dental surgery in Bracknell, Berkshire. Cosmetic dentist, orthodontist, teeth whitening, root canal treatments and much more.

[isitandwonder]

Sherlock vs. Poirot

Folks, I think we have another one! And as David Suchet will be on Doctor Who tonight - it seems strangely fitting to post this today.

I watched “One, Two, Buckle My Shoe” from the Poirot collection today. And, wow, are there many parallels to Sherlock S4!

The story is a bit complicated...

It starts in India, with a Shakespeare performance. Not Henry V, but anyway:

There, we meet two actresses, Gerda Grant and Mabelle Sainsbury Seale. Gerda gets married to Alistair Blunt.

They all meet years later at their dentist Mr Morley...

Mr Morley is the first victim in this case. The others are Mr Amberiotis, or Ajey, as I will call him

And Mabelle Sainsbury Seale:

^^This one, not this one:

Because ^^this woman ist also this woman:

And this woman:

She’s also impersonating a Mrs Chapman...

Yes, one actress, Joanna Phillips-Lane, playing at least three different roles in this adaption - four if you count older Gerda as well (television history for Sian Brooke in S4 - my arse!). And her disguise is rather simple yet clever: with a big hat, cheap jewelery or glasses she disguises herself very good, adapting the main characteristics of the persons she impersonates... yes, like Eurus/therapist/E/Faith (as Moffat has said, a detail like a cane averts the eye).

I won’t go into the details of the case, but they play an elaborate charade to kill the dentist, and impostering people already dead plays a vital role in the cunning plan. It’s all because a secret from the past doesn’t come to light.

The killer, Alistair Blunt, is a very rich and very influentional banker (like CS is a very rich and very influential businessman and therefore thinks himself untouchable, superior) who deems himself above the law until the end. No one suspects him except Poirot, who is not fooled by wealth and power - like Sherlock in TLD with CS.

What I also found visually interesting were the little girls playing outside the dentist, singing the song the story derived its name from (and a shoe buckle is one important clue in the end). The song goes: 

One, two,Buckle my shoe;Three, four,Knock at the door;Five, six,Pick up sticks;Seven, eight,Lay them straight:Nine, ten,A big fat hen;Eleven, twelve,Dig and delve;Thirteen, fourteen,Maids a-courting;Fifteen, sixteen,Maids in the kitchen;Seventeen, eighteen,Maids in waitingNineteen, twenty,My plate's empty.

A bit like Eurus song. The songs pops up as some kind of echoe throughout the episode. And look at the girls, their shoes:

Those shoes, white socks, the sensible dresses reminded me very much of young Eurus, who, btw, is not at all dressed like a little girl at the beginning of the 1980s but rather than one in the 1930s:

See what I mean?

Ok, and bonus one: Lady Bracknell (here called Julia Olivera)

Or, as quoted in TFP by John: “The truth is rarely pure, and never simple.”

Bonus two is a young Christopher Ecclestone:

There’s more stuff in it like murder disguised as suicide, a woman in red firing a gun, alleged Secret Service ties...

Try to watch it if you haven’t yet.

@ebaeschnbliah @221bloodnun @waitedforgarridebs @mollydobby

[melissatatum14]

If you or your family members are suffering from any dental problem you can visit the dentists in Bracknell because they can give you back your valuable assets. There they treat the patients with modern equipment and giving you the best service.

[medicalcodingjob]

Dental Nurse/PA

Howard Finley Ltd – Bracknell, Berkshire – Howard Finley are currently recruiting for a Dental Nurse/PA to join a clinic in the Bracknell area, Berkshire. The role; This role is a fill time position, with 4/5 days available per week. We are looking for someone to come in and hit the ground running Working directly with the Dentist, Practice Manager, other Dental Nurses and treatment coordinators…

[charlesmichel234]

Dentists Bracknell, Berkshire: Glenmore dental practice provide the full range of dental treatments including emergency dentists. Oral Dental surgery in Bracknell, Berkshire. Cosmetic dentist, orthodontist, teeth whitening, root canal treatments and much more.

[littlefinger488-blog]

The Importance of Being Earnest

The Importance Of Being Earnest August 22, 2017 SCENE Morning-room in Algernons flat in Half-Moon Street. The room is luxuriously and artistically furnished. The sound of a piano is heard in the adjoining room. [Lane is arranging afternoon tea on the table, and after the music has ceased, Algernon enters.] READ: The paperback version of the importance of being earnest on Amazon.com https://www.amazon.com/dp/1975665783/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_qlkNzbXTHMP86 Algernon. Did you hear what I was playing, Lane? Lane. I didnt think it polite to listen, sir. Algernon. Im sorry for that, for your sake. I dont play accuratelyany one can play accuratelybut I play with wonderful expression. As far as the piano is concerned, sentiment is my forte. I keep science for Life. Lane. Yes, sir. Algernon. And, speaking of the science of Life, have you got the cucumber sandwiches cut for Lady Bracknell? Lane. Yes, sir. [Hands them on a salver.] Algernon. [Inspects them, takes two, and sits down on the sofa.] Oh! . . . by the way, Lane, I see from your book that on Thursday night, when Lord Shoreman and Mr. Worthing were dining with me, eight bottles of champagne are entered as having been consumed. Lane. Yes, sir; eight bottles and a pint. Algernon. Why is it that at a bachelors establishment the servants invariably drink the champagne? I ask merely for information. Lane. I attribute it to the superior quality of the wine, sir. I have often observed that in married households the champagne is rarely of a first-rate brand. Algernon. Good heavens! Is marriage so demoralising as that? Lane. I believe it is a very pleasant state, sir. I have had very little experience of it myself up to the present. I have only been married once. That was in consequence of a misunderstanding between myself and a young person. Algernon. [Languidly.] I dont know that I am much interested in your family life, Lane. Lane. No, sir; it is not a very interesting subject. I never think of it myself. Algernon. Very natural, I am sure. That will do, Lane, thank you. Lane. Thank you, sir. [Lane goes out.] Algernon. Lanes views on marriage seem somewhat lax. Really, if the lower orders dont set us a good example, what on earth is the use of them? They seem, as a class, to have absolutely no sense of moral responsibility. [Enter Lane.] Lane. Mr. Ernest Worthing. [Enter Jack.] [Lane goes out.] Algernon. How are you, my dear Ernest? What brings you up to town? Jack. Oh, pleasure, pleasure! What else should bring one anywhere? Eating as usual, I see, Algy! Algernon. [Stiffly.] I believe it is customary in good society to take some slight refreshment at five oclock. Where have you been since last Thursday? Jack. [Sitting down on the sofa.] In the country. Algernon. What on earth do you do there? Jack. [Pulling off his gloves.] When one is in town one amuses oneself. When one is in the country one amuses other people. It is excessively boring. Algernon. And who are the people you amuse? Jack. [Airily.] Oh, neighbours, neighbours. Algernon. Got nice neighbours in your part of Shropshire? Jack. Perfectly horrid! Never speak to one of them. Algernon. How immensely you must amuse them! [Goes over and takes sandwich.] By the way, Shropshire is your county, is it not? Jack. Eh? Shropshire? Yes, of course. Hallo! Why all these cups? Why cucumber sandwiches? Why such reckless extravagance in one so young? Who is coming to tea? Algernon. Oh! merely Aunt Augusta and Gwendolen. Jack. How perfectly delightful! Algernon. Yes, that is all very well; but I am afraid Aunt Augusta wont quite approve of your being here. Jack. May I ask why? Algernon. My dear fellow, the way you flirt with Gwendolen is perfectly disgraceful. It is almost as bad as the way Gwendolen flirts with you. Jack. I am in love with Gwendolen. I have come up to town expressly to propose to her. Algernon. I thought you had come up for pleasure? . . . I call that business. Jack. How utterly unromantic you are! Algernon. I really dont see anything romantic in proposing. It is very romantic to be in love. But there is nothing romantic about a definite proposal. Why, one may be accepted. One usually is, I believe. Then the excitement is all over. The very essence of romance is uncertainty. If ever I get married, Ill certainly try to forget the fact. Jack. I have no doubt about that, dear Algy. The Divorce Court was specially invented for people whose memories are so curiously constituted. Algernon. Oh! there is no use speculating on that subject. Divorces are made in Heaven[Jack puts out his hand to take a sandwich. Algernon at once interferes.] Please dont touch the cucumber sandwiches. They are ordered specially for Aunt Augusta. [Takes one and eats it.] Jack. Well, you have been eating them all the time. Algernon. That is quite a different matter. She is my aunt. [Takes plate from below.] Have some bread and butter. The bread and butter is for Gwendolen. Gwendolen is devoted to bread and butter. Jack. [Advancing to table and helping himself.] And very good bread and butter it is too. Algernon. Well, my dear fellow, you need not eat as if you were going to eat it all. You behave as if you were married to her already. You are not married to her already, and I dont think you ever will be. Jack. Why on earth do you say that? Algernon. Well, in the first place girls never marry the men they flirt with. Girls dont think it right. Jack. Oh, that is nonsense! Algernon. It isnt. It is a great truth. It accounts for the extraordinary number of bachelors that one sees all over the place. In the second place, I dont give my consent. Jack. Your consent! Algernon. My dear fellow, Gwendolen is my first cousin. And before I allow you to marry her, you will have to clear up the whole question of Cecily. [Rings bell.] Jack. Cecily! What on earth do you mean? What do you mean, Algy, by Cecily! I dont know any one of the name of Cecily. [Enter Lane.] Algernon. Bring me that cigarette case Mr. Worthing left in the smoking-room the last time he dined here. Lane. Yes, sir. [Lane goes out.] Jack. Do you mean to say you have had my cigarette case all this time? I wish to goodness you had let me know. I have been writing frantic letters to Scotland Yard about it. I was very nearly offering a large reward. Algernon. Well, I wish you would offer one. I happen to be more than usually hard up. Jack. There is no good offering a large reward now that the thing is found. [Enter Lane with the cigarette case on a salver. Algernon takes it at once. Lane goes out.] Algernon. I think that is rather mean of you, Ernest, I must say. [Opens case and examines it.] However, it makes no matter, for, now that I look at the inscription inside, I find that the thing isnt yours after all. Jack. Of course its mine. [Moving to him.] You have seen me with it a hundred times, and you have no right whatsoever to read what is written inside. It is a very ungentlemanly thing to read a private cigarette case. Algernon. Oh! it is absurd to have a hard and fast rule about what one should read and what one shouldnt. More than half of modern culture depends on what one shouldnt read. Jack. I am quite aware of the fact, and I dont propose to discuss modern culture. It isnt the sort of thing one should talk of in private. I simply want my cigarette case back. Algernon. Yes; but this isnt your cigarette case. This cigarette case is a present from some one of the name of Cecily, and you said you didnt know any one of that name. Jack. Well, if you want to know, Cecily happens to be my aunt. Algernon. Your aunt! Jack. Yes. Charming old lady she is, too. Lives at Tunbridge Wells. Just give it back to me, Algy. Algernon. [Retreating to back of sofa.] But why does she call herself little Cecily if she is your aunt and lives at Tunbridge Wells? [Reading.] From little Cecily with her fondest love. Jack. [Moving to sofa and kneeling upon it.] My dear fellow, what on earth is there in that? Some aunts are tall, some aunts are not tall. That is a matter that surely an aunt may be allowed to decide for herself. You seem to think that every aunt should be exactly like your aunt! That is absurd! For Heavens sake give me back my cigarette case. [Follows Algernon round the room.] Algernon. Yes. But why does your aunt call you her uncle? From little Cecily, with her fondest love to her dear Uncle Jack. There is no objection, I admit, to an aunt being a small aunt, but why an aunt, no matter what her size may be, should call her own nephew her uncle, I cant quite make out. Besides, your name isnt Jack at all; it is Ernest. Jack. It isnt Ernest; its Jack. Algernon. You have always told me it was Ernest. I have introduced you to every one as Ernest. You answer to the name of Ernest. You look as if your name was Ernest. You are the most earnest-looking person I ever saw in my life. It is perfectly absurd your saying that your name isnt Ernest. Its on your cards. Here is one of them. [Taking it from case.] Mr. Ernest Worthing, B. 4, The Albany. Ill keep this as a proof that your name is Ernest if ever you attempt to deny it to me, or to Gwendolen, or to any one else. [Puts the card in his pocket.] Jack. Well, my name is Ernest in town and Jack in the country, and the cigarette case was given to me in the country. Algernon. Yes, but that does not account for the fact that your small Aunt Cecily, who lives at Tunbridge Wells, calls you her dear uncle. Come, old boy, you had much better have the thing out at once. Jack. My dear Algy, you talk exactly as if you were a dentist. It is very vulgar to talk like a dentist when one isnt a dentist. It produces a false impression. Algernon. Well, that is exactly what dentists always do. Now, go on! Tell me the whole thing. I may mention that I have always suspected you of being a confirmed and secret Bunburyist; and I am quite sure of it now. Jack. Bunburyist? What on earth do you mean by a Bunburyist? Algernon. Ill reveal to you the meaning of that incomparable expression as soon as you are kind enough to inform me why you are Ernest in town and Jack in the country. Jack. Well, produce my cigarette case first. Algernon. Here it is. [Hands cigarette case.] Now produce your explanation, and pray make it improbable. [Sits on sofa.] Jack. My dear fellow, there is nothing improbable about my explanation at all. In fact its perfectly ordinary. Old Mr. Thomas Cardew, who adopted me when I was a little boy, made me in his will guardian to his grand-daughter, Miss Cecily Cardew. Cecily, who addresses me as her uncle from motives of respect that you could not possibly appreciate, lives at my place in the country under the charge of her admirable governess, Miss Prism. Algernon. Where is that place in the country, by the way? Jack. That is nothing to you, dear boy. You are not going to be invited . . . I may tell you candidly that the place is not in Shropshire. Algernon. I suspected that, my dear fellow! I have Bunburyed all over Shropshire on two separate occasions. Now, go on. Why are you Ernest in town and Jack in the country? Jack. My dear Algy, I dont know whether you will be able to understand my real motives. You are hardly serious enough. When one is placed in the position of guardian, one has to adopt a very high moral tone on all subjects. Its ones duty to do so. And as a high moral tone can hardly be said to conduce very much to either ones health or ones happiness, in order to get up to town I have always pretended to have a younger brother of the name of Ernest, who lives in the Albany, and gets into the most dreadful scrapes. That, my dear Algy, is the whole truth pure and simple. Algernon. The truth is rarely pure and never simple. Modern life would be very tedious if it were either, and modern literature a complete impossibility! Jack. That wouldnt be at all a bad thing. Algernon. Literary criticism is not your forte, my dear fellow. Dont try it. You should leave that to people who havent been at a University. They do it so well in the daily papers. What you really are is a Bunburyist. I was quite right in saying you were a Bunburyist. You are one of the most advanced Bunburyists I know. Jack. What on earth do you mean? Algernon. You have invented a very useful younger brother called Ernest, in order that you may be able to come up to town as often as you like. I have invented an invaluable permanent invalid called Bunbury, in order that I may be able to go down into the country whenever I choose. Bunbury is perfectly invaluable. If it wasnt for Bunburys extraordinary bad health, for instance, I wouldnt be able to dine with you at Williss to-night, for I have been really engaged to Aunt Augusta for more than a week. Jack. I havent asked you to dine with me anywhere to-night. Algernon. I know. You are absurdly careless about sending out invitations. It is very foolish of you. Nothing annoys people so much as not receiving invitations. Jack. You had much better dine with your Aunt Augusta. Algernon. I havent the smallest intention of doing anything of the kind. To begin with, I dined there on Monday, and once a week is quite enough to dine with ones own relations. In the second place, whenever I do dine there I am always treated as a member of the family, and sent down with either no woman at all, or two. In the third place, I know perfectly well whom she will place me next to, to-night. She will place me next Mary Farquhar, who always flirts with her own husband across the dinner-table. That is not very pleasant. Indeed, it is not even decent . . . and that sort of thing is enormously on the increase. The amount of women in London who flirt with their own husbands is perfectly scandalous. It looks so bad. It is simply washing ones clean linen in public. Besides, now that I know you to be a confirmed Bunburyist I naturally want to talk to you about Bunburying. I want to tell you the rules. Jack. Im not a Bunburyist at all. If Gwendolen accepts me, I am going to kill my brother, indeed I think Ill kill him in any case. Cecily is a little too much interested in him. It is rather a bore. So I am going to get rid of Ernest. And I strongly advise you to do the same with Mr. . . . with your invalid friend who has the absurd name. Algernon. Nothing will induce me to part with Bunbury, and if you ever get married, which seems to me extremely problematic, you will be very glad to know Bunbury. A man who marries without knowing Bunbury has a very tedious time of it. Jack. That is nonsense. If I marry a charming girl like Gwendolen, and she is the only girl I ever saw in my life that I would marry, I certainly wont want to know Bunbury. Algernon. Then your wife will. You dont seem to realise, that in married life three is company and two is none. Jack. [Sententiously.] That, my dear young friend, is the theory that the corrupt French Drama has been propounding for the last fifty years. Algernon. Yes; and that the happy English home has proved in half the time. Jack. For heavens sake, dont try to be cynical. Its perfectly easy to be cynical. Algernon. My dear fellow, it isnt easy to be anything nowadays. Theres such a lot of beastly competition about. [The sound of an electric bell is heard.] Ah! that must be Aunt Augusta. Only relatives, or creditors, ever ring in that Wagnerian manner. Now, if I get her out of the way for ten minutes, so that you can have an opportunity for proposing to Gwendolen, may I dine with you to-night at Williss? Jack. I suppose so, if you want to. Algernon. Yes, but you must be serious about it. I hate people who are not serious about meals. It is so shallow of them. [Enter Lane.] Lane. Lady Bracknell and Miss Fairfax. [Algernon goes forward to meet them. Enter Lady Bracknell and Gwendolen.] Lady Bracknell. Good afternoon, dear Algernon, I hope you are behaving very well. Algernon. Im feeling very well, Aunt Augusta. Lady Bracknell. Thats not quite the same thing. In fact the two things rarely go together. [Sees Jack and bows to him with icy coldness.] Algernon. [To Gwendolen.] Dear me, you are smart! Gwendolen. I am always smart! Am I not, Mr. Worthing? Jack. Youre quite perfect, Miss Fairfax. Gwendolen. Oh! I hope I am not that. It would leave no room for developments, and I intend to develop in many directions. [Gwendolen and Jack sit down together in the corner.] Lady Bracknell. Im sorry if we are a little late, Algernon, but I was obliged to call on dear Lady Harbury. I hadnt been there since her poor husbands death. I never saw a woman so altered; she looks quite twenty years younger. And now Ill have a cup of tea, and one of those nice cucumber sandwiches you promised me. Algernon. Certainly, Aunt Augusta. [Goes over to tea-table.] Lady Bracknell. Wont you come and sit here, Gwendolen? Gwendolen. Thanks, mamma, Im quite comfortable where I am. Algernon. [Picking up empty plate in horror.] Good heavens! Lane! Why are there no cucumber sandwiches? I ordered them specially. Lane. [Gravely.] There were no cucumbers in the market this morning, sir. I went down twice. Algernon. No cucumbers! Lane. No, sir. Not even for ready money. Algernon. That will do, Lane, thank you. Lane. Thank you, sir. [Goes out.] Algernon. I am greatly distressed, Aunt Augusta, about there being no cucumbers, not even for ready money. Lady Bracknell. It really makes no matter, Algernon. I had some crumpets with Lady Harbury, who seems to me to be living entirely for pleasure now. Algernon. I hear her hair has turned quite gold from grief. Lady Bracknell. It certainly has changed its colour. From what cause I, of course, cannot say. [Algernon crosses and hands tea.] Thank you. Ive quite a treat for you to-night, Algernon. I am going to send you down with Mary Farquhar. She is such a nice woman, and so attentive to her husband. Its delightful to watch them. Algernon. I am afraid, Aunt Augusta, I shall have to give up the pleasure of dining with you to-night after all. Lady Bracknell. [Frowning.] I hope not, Algernon. It would put my table completely out. Your uncle would have to dine upstairs. Fortunately he is accustomed to that. Algernon. It is a great bore, and, I need hardly say, a terrible disappointment to me, but the fact is I have just had a telegram to say that my poor friend Bunbury is very ill again. [Exchanges glances with Jack.] They seem to think I should be with him. Lady Bracknell. It is very strange. This Mr. Bunbury seems to suffer from curiously bad health. Algernon. Yes; poor Bunbury is a dreadful invalid. Lady Bracknell. Well, I must say, Algernon, that I think it is high time that Mr. Bunbury made up his mind whether he was going to live or to die. This shilly-shallying with the question is absurd. Nor do I in any way approve of the modern sympathy with invalids. I consider it morbid. Illness of any kind is hardly a thing to be encouraged in others. Health is the primary duty of life. I am always telling that to your poor uncle, but he never seems to take much notice . . . as far as any improvement in his ailment goes. I should be much obliged if you would ask Mr. Bunbury, from me, to be kind enough not to have a relapse on Saturday, for I rely on you to arrange my music for me. It is my last reception, and one wants something that will encourage conversation, particularly at the end of the season when every one has practically said whatever they had to say, which, in most cases, was probably not much. Algernon. Ill speak to Bunbury, Aunt Augusta, if he is still conscious, and I think I can promise you hell be all right by Saturday. Of course the music is a great difficulty. You see, if one plays good music, people dont listen, and if one plays bad music people dont talk. But Ill run over the programme Ive drawn out, if you will kindly come into the next room for a moment. Lady Bracknell. Thank you, Algernon. It is very thoughtful of you. [Rising, and following Algernon.] Im sure the programme will be delightful, after a few expurgations. French songs I cannot possibly allow. People always seem to think that they are improper, and either look shocked, which is vulgar, or laugh, which is worse. But German sounds a thoroughly respectable language, and indeed, I believe is so. Gwendolen, you will accompany me. Gwendolen. Certainly, mamma. [Lady Bracknell and Algernon go into the music-room, Gwendolen remains behind.] Jack. Charming day it has been, Miss Fairfax. Gwendolen. Pray dont talk to me about the weather, Mr. Worthing. Whenever people talk to me about the weather, I always feel quite certain that they mean something else. And that makes me so nervous. Jack. I do mean something else. Gwendolen. I thought so. In fact, I am never wrong. Jack. And I would like to be allowed to take advantage of Lady Bracknells temporary absence . . . Gwendolen. I would certainly advise you to do so. Mamma has a way of coming back suddenly into a room that I have often had to speak to her about. Jack. [Nervously.] Miss Fairfax, ever since I met you I have admired you more than any girl . . . I have ever met since . . . I met you. Gwendolen. Yes, I am quite well aware of the fact. And I often wish that in public, at any rate, you had been more demonstrative. For me you have always had an irresistible fascination. Even before I met you I was far from indifferent to you. [Jack looks at her in amazement.] We live, as I hope you know, Mr. Worthing, in an age of ideals. The fact is constantly mentioned in the more expensive monthly magazines, and has reached the provincial pulpits, I am told; and my ideal has always been to love some one of the name of Ernest. There is something in that name that inspires absolute confidence. The moment Algernon first mentioned to me that he had a friend called Ernest, I knew I was destined to love you. Jack. You really love me, Gwendolen? Gwendolen. Passionately! Jack. Darling! You dont know how happy youve made me. Gwendolen. My own Ernest! Jack. But you dont really mean to say that you couldnt love me if my name wasnt Ernest? Gwendolen. But your name is Ernest. Jack. Yes, I know it is. But supposing it was something else? Do you mean to say you couldnt love me then? Gwendolen. [Glibly.] Ah! that is clearly a metaphysical speculation, and like most metaphysical speculations has very little reference at all to the actual facts of real life, as we know them. Jack. Personally, darling, to speak quite candidly, I dont much care about the name of Ernest . . . I dont think the name suits me at all. Gwendolen. It suits you perfectly. It is a divine name. It has a music of its own. It produces vibrations. Jack. Well, really, Gwendolen, I must say that I think there are lots of other much nicer names. I think Jack, for instance, a charming name. Gwendolen. Jack? . . . No, there is very little music in the name Jack, if any at all, indeed. It does not thrill. It produces absolutely no vibrations . . . I have known several Jacks, and they all, without exception, were more than usually plain. Besides, Jack is a notorious domesticity for John! And I pity any woman who is married to a man called John. She would probably never be allowed to know the entrancing pleasure of a single moments solitude. The only really safe name is Ernest. Jack. Gwendolen, I must get christened at onceI mean we must get married at once. There is no time to be lost. Gwendolen. Married, Mr. Worthing? Jack. [Astounded.] Well . . . surely. You know that I love you, and you led me to believe, Miss Fairfax, that you were not absolutely indifferent to me. Gwendolen. I adore you. But you havent proposed to me yet. Nothing has been said at all about marriage. The subject has not even been touched on. Jack. Well . . . may I propose to you now? Gwendolen. I think it would be an admirable opportunity. And to spare you any possible disappointment, Mr. Worthing, I think it only fair to tell you quite frankly before-hand that I am fully determined to accept you. Jack. Gwendolen! Gwendolen. Yes, Mr. Worthing, what have you got to say to me? Jack. You know what I have got to say to you. Gwendolen. Yes, but you dont say it. Jack. Gwendolen, will you marry me? [Goes on his knees.] Gwendolen. Of course I will, darling. How long you have been about it! I am afraid you have had very little experience in how to propose. Jack. My own one, I have never loved any one in the world but you. Gwendolen. Yes, but men often propose for practice. I know my brother Gerald does. All my girl-friends tell me so. What wonderfully blue eyes you have, Ernest! They are quite, quite, blue. I hope you will always look at me just like that, especially when there are other people present. [Enter Lady Bracknell.] Lady Bracknell. Mr. Worthing! Rise, sir, from this semi-recumbent posture. It is most indecorous. Gwendolen. Mamma! [He tries to rise; she restrains him.] I must beg you to retire. This is no place for you. Besides, Mr. Worthing has not quite finished yet. Lady Bracknell. Finished what, may I ask? Gwendolen. I am engaged to Mr. Worthing, mamma. [They rise together.] Lady Bracknell. Pardon me, you are not engaged to any one. When you do become engaged to some one, I, or your father, should his health permit him, will inform you of the fact. An engagement should come on a young girl as a surprise, pleasant or unpleasant, as the case may be. It is hardly a matter that she could be allowed to arrange for herself . . . And now I have a few questions to put to you, Mr. Worthing. While I am making these inquiries, you, Gwendolen, will wait for me below in the carriage. Gwendolen. [Reproachfully.] Mamma! Lady Bracknell. In the carriage, Gwendolen! [Gwendolen goes to the door. She and Jack blow kisses to each other behind Lady Bracknells back. Lady Bracknell looks vaguely about as if she could not understand what the noise was. Finally turns round.] Gwendolen, the carriage! Gwendolen. Yes, mamma. [Goes out, looking back at Jack.] Lady Bracknell. [Sitting down.] You can take a seat, Mr. Worthing. [Looks in her pocket for note-book and pencil.] Jack. Thank you, Lady Bracknell, I prefer standing. Lady Bracknell. [Pencil and note-book in hand.] I feel bound to tell you that you are not down on my list of eligible young men, although I have the same list as the dear Duchess of Bolton has. We work together, in fact. However, I am quite ready to enter your name, should your answers be what a really affectionate mother requires. Do you smoke? Jack. Well, yes, I must admit I smoke. Lady Bracknell. I am glad to hear it. A man should always have an occupation of some kind. There are far too many idle men in London as it is. How old are you? Jack. Twenty-nine. Lady Bracknell. A very good age to be married at. I have always been of opinion that a man who desires to get married should know either everything or nothing. Which do you know? Jack. [After some hesitation.] I know nothing, Lady Bracknell. Lady Bracknell. I am pleased to hear it. I do not approve of anything that tampers with natural ignorance. Ignorance is like a delicate exotic fruit; touch it and the bloom is gone. The whole theory of modern education is radically unsound. Fortunately in England, at any rate, education produces no effect whatsoever. If it did, it would prove a serious danger to the upper classes, and probably lead to acts of violence in Grosvenor Square. What is your income? Jack. Between seven and eight thousand a year. Lady Bracknell. [Makes a note in her book.] In land, or in investments? Jack. In investments, chiefly. Lady Bracknell. That is satisfactory. What between the duties expected of one during ones lifetime, and the duties exacted from one after ones death, land has ceased to be either a profit or a pleasure. It gives one position, and prevents one from keeping it up. Thats all that can be said about land. Jack. I have a country house with some land, of course, attached to it, about fifteen hundred acres, I believe; but I dont depend on that for my real income. In fact, as far as I can make out, the poachers are the only people who make anything out of it. Lady Bracknell. A country house! How many bedrooms? Well, that point can be cleared up afterwards. You have a town house, I hope? A girl with a simple, unspoiled nature, like Gwendolen, could hardly be expected to reside in the country. Jack. Well, I own a house in Belgrave Square, but it is let by the year to Lady Bloxham. Of course, I can get it back whenever I like, at six months notice. Lady Bracknell. Lady Bloxham? I dont know her. Jack. Oh, she goes about very little. She is a lady considerably advanced in years. Lady Bracknell. Ah, nowadays that is no guarantee of respectability of character. What number in Belgrave Square? Jack. 149. Lady Bracknell. [Shaking her head.] The unfashionable side. I thought there was something. However, that could easily be altered. Jack. Do you mean the fashion, or the side? Lady Bracknell. [Sternly.] Both, if necessary, I presume. What are your politics? Jack. Well, I am afraid I really have none. I am a Liberal Unionist. Lady Bracknell. Oh, they count as Tories. They dine with us. Or come in the evening, at any rate. Now to minor matters. Are your parents living? Jack. I have lost both my parents. Lady Bracknell. To lose one parent, Mr. Worthing, may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness. Who was your father? He was evidently a man of some wealth. Was he born in what the Radical papers call the purple of commerce, or did he rise from the ranks of the aristocracy? Jack. I am afraid I really dont know. The fact is, Lady Bracknell, I said I had lost my parents. It would be nearer the truth to say that my parents seem to have lost me . . . I dont actually know who I am by birth. I was . . . well, I was found. Lady Bracknell. Found! Jack. The late Mr. Thomas Cardew, an old gentleman of a very charitable and kindly disposition, found me, and gave me the name of Worthing, because he happened to have a first-class ticket for Worthing in his pocket at the time. Worthing is a place in Sussex. It is a seaside resort. Lady Bracknell. Where did the charitable gentleman who had a first-class ticket for this seaside resort find you? Jack. [Gravely.] In a hand-bag. Lady Bracknell. A hand-bag? Jack. [Very seriously.] Yes, Lady Bracknell. I was in a hand-baga somewhat large, black leather hand-bag, with handles to itan ordinary hand-bag in fact. Lady Bracknell. In what locality did this Mr. James, or Thomas, Cardew come across this ordinary hand-bag? Jack. In the cloak-room at Victoria Station. It was given to him in mistake for his own. Lady Bracknell. The cloak-room at Victoria Station? Jack. Yes. The Brighton line. Lady Bracknell. The line is immaterial. Mr. Worthing, I confess I feel somewhat bewildered by what you have just told me. To be born, or at any rate bred, in a hand-bag, whether it had handles or not, seems to me to display a contempt for the ordinary decencies of family life that reminds one of the worst excesses of the French Revolution. And I presume you know what that unfortunate movement led to? As for the particular locality in which the hand-bag was found, a cloak-room at a railway station might serve to conceal a social indiscretionhas probably, indeed, been used for that purpose before nowbut it could hardly be regarded as an assured basis for a recognised position in good society. Jack. May I ask you then what you would advise me to do? I need hardly say I would do anything in the world to ensure Gwendolens happiness. Lady Bracknell. I would strongly advise you, Mr. Worthing, to try and acquire some relations as soon as possible, and to make a definite effort to produce at any rate one parent, of either sex, before the season is quite over. Jack. Well, I dont see how I could possibly manage to do that. I can produce the hand-bag at any moment. It is in my dressing-room at home. I really think that should satisfy you, Lady Bracknell. Lady Bracknell. Me, sir! What has it to do with me? You can hardly imagine that I and Lord Bracknell would dream of allowing our only daughtera girl brought up with the utmost careto marry into a cloak-room, and form an alliance with a parcel? Good morning, Mr. Worthing! [Lady Bracknell sweeps out in majestic indignation.] Jack. Good morning! [Algernon, from the other room, strikes up the Wedding March. Jack looks perfectly furious, and goes to the door.] For goodness sake dont play that ghastly tune, Algy. How idiotic you are! [The music stops and Algernon enters cheerily.] Algernon. Didnt it go off all right, old boy? You dont mean to say Gwendolen refused you? I know it is a way she has. She is always refusing people. I think it is most ill-natured of her. Jack. Oh, Gwendolen is as right as a trivet. As far as she is concerned, we are engaged. Her mother is perfectly unbearable. Never met such a Gorgon . . . I dont really know what a Gorgon is like, but I am quite sure that Lady Bracknell is one. In any case, she is a monster, without being a myth, which is rather unfair . . . I beg your pardon, Algy, I suppose I shouldnt talk about your own aunt in that way before you. Algernon. My dear boy, I love hearing my relations abused. It is the only thing that makes me put up with them at all. Relations are simply a tedious pack of people, who havent got the remotest knowledge of how to live, nor the smallest instinct about when to die. Jack. Oh, that is nonsense! Algernon. It isnt! Jack. Well, I wont argue about the matter. You always want to argue about things. Algernon. That is exactly what things were originally made for. Jack. Upon my word, if I thought that, Id shoot myself . . . [A pause.] You dont think there is any chance of Gwendolen becoming like her mother in about a hundred and fifty years, do you, Algy? Algernon. All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. Thats his. Jack. Is that clever? Algernon. It is perfectly phrased! and quite as true as any observation in civilised life should be. Jack. I am sick to death of cleverness. Everybody is clever nowadays. You cant go anywhere without meeting clever people. The thing has become an absolute public nuisance. I wish to goodness we had a few fools left. Algernon. We have. Jack. I should extremely like to meet them. What do they talk about? Algernon. The fools? Oh! about the clever people, of course. Jack. What fools! Algernon. By the way, did you tell Gwendolen the truth about your being Ernest in town, and Jack in the country? Jack. [In a very patronising manner.] My dear fellow, the truth isnt quite the sort of thing one tells to a nice, sweet, refined girl. What extraordinary ideas you have about the way to behave to a woman! Algernon. The only way to behave to a woman is to make love to her, if she is pretty, and to some one else, if she is plain. Jack. Oh, that is nonsense. Algernon. What about your brother? What about the profligate Ernest? Jack. Oh, before the end of the week I shall have got rid of him. Ill say he died in Paris of apoplexy. Lots of people die of apoplexy, quite suddenly, dont they? Algernon. Yes, but its hereditary, my dear fellow. Its a sort of thing that runs in families. You had much better say a severe chill. Jack. You are sure a severe chill isnt hereditary, or anything of that kind? Algernon. Of course it isnt! Jack. Very well, then. My poor brother Ernest to carried off suddenly, in Paris, by a severe chill. That gets rid of him. Algernon. But I thought you said that . . . Miss Cardew was a little too much interested in your poor brother Ernest? Wont she feel his loss a good deal? Jack. Oh, that is all right. Cecily is not a silly romantic girl, I am glad to say. She has got a capital appetite, goes long walks, and pays no attention at all to her lessons. Algernon. I would rather like to see Cecily. Jack. I will take very good care you never do. She is excessively pretty, and she is only just eighteen. Algernon. Have you told Gwendolen yet that you have an excessively pretty ward who is only just eighteen? Jack. Oh! one doesnt blurt these things out to people. Cecily and Gwendolen are perfectly certain to be extremely great friends. Ill bet you anything you like that half an hour after they have met, they will be calling each other sister. Algernon. Women only do that when they have called each other a lot of other things first. Now, my dear boy, if we want to get a good table at Williss, we really must go and dress. Do you know it is nearly seven? Jack. [Irritably.] Oh! It always is nearly seven. Algernon. Well, Im hungry. Jack. I never knew you when you werent . . . Algernon. What shall we do after dinner? Go to a theatre? Jack. Oh no! I loathe listening. Algernon. Well, let us go to the Club? Jack. Oh, no! I hate talking. Algernon. Well, we might trot round to the Empire at ten? Jack. Oh, no! I cant bear looking at things. It is so silly. Algernon. Well, what shall we do? Jack. Nothing! Algernon. It is awfully hard work doing nothing. However, I dont mind hard work where there is no definite object of any kind. [Enter Lane.] Lane. Miss Fairfax. [Enter Gwendolen. Lane goes out.] Algernon. Gwendolen, upon my word! Gwendolen. Algy, kindly turn your back. I have something very particular to say to Mr. Worthing. Algernon. Really, Gwendolen, I dont think I can allow this at all. Gwendolen. Algy, you always adopt a strictly immoral attitude towards life. You are not quite old enough to do that. [Algernon retires to the fireplace.] Jack. My own darling! Gwendolen. Ernest, we may never be married. From the expression on mammas face I fear we never shall. Few parents nowadays pay any regard to what their children say to them. The old-fashioned respect for the young is fast dying out. Whatever influence I ever had over mamma, I lost at the age of three. But although she may prevent us from becoming man and wife, and I may marry some one else, and marry often, nothing that she can possibly do can alter my eternal devotion to you. Jack. Dear Gwendolen! Gwendolen. The story of your romantic origin, as related to me by mamma, with unpleasing comments, has naturally stirred the deeper fibres of my nature. Your Christian name has an irresistible fascination. The simplicity of your character makes you exquisitely incomprehensible to me. Your town address at the Albany I have. What is your address in the country? Jack. The Manor House, Woolton, Hertfordshire. [Algernon, who has been carefully listening, smiles to himself, and writes the address on his shirt-cuff. Then picks up the Railway Guide.] Gwendolen. There is a good postal service, I suppose? It may be necessary to do something desperate. That of course will require serious consideration. I will communicate with you daily. Jack. My own one! Gwendolen. How long do you remain in town? Jack. Till Monday. Gwendolen. Good! Algy, you may turn round now. Algernon. Thanks, Ive turned round already. Gwendolen. You may also ring the bell. Jack. You will let me see you to your carriage, my own darling? Gwendolen. Certainly. Jack. [To Lane, who now enters.] I will see Miss Fairfax out. Lane. Yes, sir. [Jack and Gwendolen go off.] [Lane presents several letters on a salver to Algernon. It is to be surmised that they are bills, as Algernon, after looking at the envelopes, tears them up.] Algernon. A glass of sherry, Lane. Lane. Yes, sir. Algernon. To-morrow, Lane, Im going Bunburying. Lane. Yes, sir. Algernon. I shall probably not be back till Monday. You can put up my dress clothes, my smoking jacket, and all the Bunbury suits . . . Lane. Yes, sir. [Handing sherry.] Algernon. I hope to-morrow will be a fine day, Lane. Lane. It never is, sir. Algernon. Lane, youre a perfect pessimist. Lane. I do my best to give satisfaction, sir. [Enter Jack. Lane goes off.] Jack. Theres a sensible, intellectual girl! the only girl I ever cared for in my life. [Algernon is laughing immoderately.] What on earth are you so amused at? Algernon. Oh, Im a little anxious about poor Bunbury, that is all. Jack. If you dont take care, your friend Bunbury will get you into a serious scrape some day. Algernon. I love scrapes. They are the only things that are never serious. Jack. Oh, thats nonsense, Algy. You never talk anything but nonsense. Algernon. Nobody ever does. [Jack looks indignantly at him, and leaves the room. Algernon lights a cigarette, reads his shirt-cuff, and smiles.] ACT DROP

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