#Dazai Chuuya - nee Nakahara

[damianito]

From the start ♡

[knockyasocksoff2022]

"This reminds me of my wedding day."

HC that whenever something bad happens Dazai says "This reminds me of my wedding day." (refering to his and Chuuya's wedding). At first the ADA throigh he was just being stupid, but after Dazai keeps saying it and maybe drops a few very subtle hints, they're now convinved that Dazai is actually secretly married and wonder just what exactly the hell hgappened on his wedding day.

The truth is, a lot of things happened. Some of which include: a high speed moterbike chase, three police officers, more wine than most people could afford, a cerain makerel wearing a dress, a tempermental chibi, and an exploding car.

[sonder-paradise]

Oooh, am I seeing this right? Requests are open! ( ᗒᗨᗕ ) I’ve been waiting for this day..! If you can, can I please ask for Chuuya and/or Dazai drabble or oneshot (whichever you feel like) with an enemies to lovers trope? I’m a sucker.. thanks and I hope you’re taking care of yourself! <3

𝐅𝐥𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐫 𝐅𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠? — 𝐁𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐨𝐮 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐲 𝐃𝐨𝐠𝐬

◊ ft. chuuya nakahara, osamu dazai, gn!reader

◊ genre. enemies to lovers, drabbles, pining the hell outta each other

— 𝐂𝐡𝐮𝐮𝐲𝐚 𝐍𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚

"what the hell was that?"

chuuya's voice echoed from the hallway as the two of you trudged down after a rather inconclusive mission. it wasn't primarily your fault that you had forgotten the new series of instructions he had given you on the spot.

but then again, it was basically his fault for going off-script as well. you frowned, grasping the arm you were currently nursing.

"what do you mean, 'what the hell was that?' what the hell were you doing?!"

"i was doing fine. i thought i told you if things went south to go back to base."

"oh, shut up. i practically saved your life, nakahara."

"i didn't need that help, l/n. you're a pain in my ass anyways."

the two of you shot a glare at the other before the ache in your limbs caught up with you both. he flinched, his leg clearly going through a rather upsetting time in addition to your arm.

"c'mere let's get fix up before the Boss lectures us both," you sighed, pulling him into the room.

he frowned, shifting down on the seat across from you. upon noticing the way you struggled opening up the first aid kit, he clicked his tongue, reaching out a hand to snatch it from you.

"hey!"

"shut it. you're fucking arm isn't even working. i'll do it."

"i don't nee—"

"i didn't ask."

oh, this man! this stupid, idiotic fool! the very thought of his callous tone was enough to burn your bones and grind your teeth.

he grasped your arm, eliciting a loud wince. you expected him to scold you for the noise, but instead he lessened his pressure, holding your arm as if it were porcelain.

"sorry," he mumbled. and you practically didn't catch it if not for the fact he had gotten ever so close to you. his hands carefully bound the arm that you nursed and there was this... odd look in his pretty eyes.

wait, pretty?

you paused, starstruck at the mere thought of finding chuuya nakahara of all people 'pretty.' but there was something fascinating and hypnotizing about the way he gazed at your injuries. he seemed almost upset at them.

"stop glaring at my arm, there's nothing i could do about it."

"yeah, right. at the very least, stop squirming you're fucking up my wrapping."

"it's too tight."

chuuya paused, looking up at you before leaning in just a bit closer. a wicked smile crept into his expression and a spark of something close to lust and hatred seeped into his eyes.

"complain anymore and i'll tie your pretty, little wrists together."

— 𝐎𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐮 𝐃𝐚𝐳𝐚𝐢

"you're infuriating, dazai."

"idiotic, perhaps?"

"antagonizing."

"absolutely vexing?"

"oh shut it, we're supposed to be working right now, not fooling around in a silly cafe."

dazai grinned, cupping his hands around a warm mug of coffee. you rolled your eyes at the smile, finding this situation to be nothing less than nonsensical.

"we're supposed to be looking into the assignment fukuzawa gave us. can you please explain to me what we're doing here?"

you tapped a finger against the desk, observing the foolish man before you. he was certain a character. a wild card, if that was accurate. but, even now, when the two of you were supposed to be at work, he was fooling around.

"what's wrong? do you not like our little outing?"

dazai took a sip from his drink, smiling like a mischievous child. it's clear he's trying to overrun your patience, but you were not willing to let that go.

"i just think we should be working."

"ah, but we are, my darling! i'm working on a side project on my own."

this again. you were certain this was the fifteenth time he had mentioned this silly little side project of his. whatever it was, he clearly was getting closer to the conclusion of it.

"what's wrong, y/n? not liking the company?"

"not at all, actually."

he gave you a brief pout from behind the cup. there's something oddly adorable about it. just from the way he seemed so earnest towards you. as if there's something he wanted to admit for the first time.

"sorry," you mumbled, seemingly surprised at your own apology.

"not need, i'd say you aren't exactly my cup of tea either."

oh, you have half a mind to throw hands with this man right here and now. but you pause that thought when he flashes that familiar grin all over again.

"but those sorts of feelings are what people usually sort out on first dates, no?"

"i suppose so... wait... first date?"

dazai seems amused at this. the laughter that trickles out from him as you burning from the neck up.

"yes, first date. is this not what this is? after all the hard work i put into planning my little side project..."

oh, this little bastard...!

Taglist: @todorokichills @alittlesimp @greenshirtimagines @darlinqserenity @nameless-shrimp @whorefordazai @requiem626k @missrown @nonsense-corner @kiyokoxd @jessbeinme15 @starglow-xx @shadyteacup @scul-pted @kuraxmasha @yochicoz @pompompurin1028 @trashykawahq @swrdemon @life-sus @foolishestchildofchilds @fyodorscello @planetxiao @dazaiaiko @chuuyasboots @allisonlol @questioningmyownexistence @sebtomm @nullified-kiss @nathansside @cuteflowers-101 @sigmafied @boombboi @scarletta-ruan @skgch @daz8i @httpsobi @dazaiscum @thekaylahub @luciferspen @dazaisfavgf @alice0blog @irethepotato @monastary @kageyama-i-want-tobiors @disa-ster @mastering-procrastinating @wonpielle @ay-chuu @killmewithafanfic @aestellia @goldenglow149

[chuuyrr]

ooohhhh i just thought of a super cute idea. So for whatever reason, Gojo is having baby fushiguro reader stay with like dazai and chuuya but reader has a nightmare and will only be calmed down if they stay with reader

dazai osamu + nakahara chuuya when scarlet witch! baby fushiguro! reader has a nightmare

jujutsu kaisen x reader x bungou stray dogs

masterlist of the series

╰➤ CW(s): possible spoilers for jujutsu kaisen (higher-ups and zenin-clan) and bungou stray dogs (stormbringer), fluff/comfort, mentions of nightmares, dazai and chuuya being child! reader's caring older brothers (or parents)

╰➤ PAIRING(s): platonic! bungou stray dogs x child! reader (dazai, chuuya), platonic! jujutsu kaisen x child! reader (gojo)

before you read: hi, in case you're new, you're megumi's younger half-sibling, and while you don't have cursed energy, you do have scarlet witch's powers and abilities! aside from that, as a special scarlet witch variant, you also have the ability to travel across the multiverse. how chaotic! furthermore, like your half-brother megumi, you are being cared for by gojo satoru, who also serves as your adoptive father. for more info, please see the masterlist.

both dazai osamu and nakahara chuuya had re-united as double black for a mission and were about to separate when a red portal broke through their reality, and the next thing they knew, you had appeared before them.

"[name]-chan!" dazai exclaimed with a small gasp, shoving chuuya away, who responded with an annoyed scream, and darted towards you with welcoming open arms.

"dazai-nii!" you dashed towards dazai, colliding with him and wrapping your tiny arms around his legs as he affectionately patted your head.

dazai couldn't help but smile when he saw you. it had been a long day, and chuuya was getting on his nerves.

"what are you doing here, huh?" dazai asked sweetly, chuckling softly at you.

chuuya furrowed his brows as he trotted towards you, who was clinging to dazai, blinking at the small backpack you were wearing.

"hey, chibi. what's with the bag you have there with you?" a very perceptive chuuya knew that whenever you visited their universe, you were always empty-handed, so he couldn't help but wonder this time.

"oh, chuuya's right," dazai said as he tugged on the handle of your backpack, his eyes widening slightly, "huh, it's a little heavy too."

"daddy wants me to stay here for a while longer," you answered glumly in reply as you looked up at dazai and chuuya, "so he packed me my clothes, toothbrush, and stuffies."

"oh? and why is that?" chuuya inquired, looking at you with concerned eyes.

"i'm not sure. he said he was going somewhere and gumi-nii, yuuji-nii, nobara-nee or any of my family wouldn't be able to watch over me," you explained, now fiddling with your thumbs, "and i couldn't go with any of them because he said it is very important that i stay here."

your storytelling as a toddler may have been ambiguous, but thanks to dazai's and chuuya's deductive abilities, they were able to figure out what you exactly meant by that.

you had mentioned it before, how the higher-ups and this zenin clan of sorts wanted to take you away from your father, who they knew was named gojo satoru. gojo appeared to have simply wanted you to lay low somewhere for the time being and couldn't risk your safety, so he had asked you to dimensional travel, which led you to where dazai and chuuya were because apart from your very own family, they were people you felt safe with.

"you're going to be alright kid, i'm sure your dad will take care of it as soon as possible, okay?" chuuya sighed deeply before his lips curved into a smile.

"where will i stay though?" you asked, tipping your head to the side.

"yeah, we're definitely staying with chuuya, [name]-chan. my place is a mess," dazai responded immediately, eliciting a surprised "HAH?!" from the man in question.

"am i not allowed to stay with you?" you frowned at chuuya, who immediately shook his head and waved his hands frantically in the air.

"that's not what i meant. of course you can stay with me at my place, chibi. i actually prefer if you stayed with me," chuuya said to you softly before scowling at dazai, "but you are not coming over at my place, vagabond."

"come on, chuuya. just think of it as a sleepover! plus, i'm her dazai-nii. [name]-chan is still my responsibility. i need to make sure you take good care of her," dazai emphasized dramatically, placing his hand on his chest.

"oh, please! we both know that i take better care of the kid than you do!" chuuya argued, narrowing his eyes and pointing at dazai, "and there's no way i'm letting [name] stay in a dangerous place like yours, you ass!"

after a good minute of bickering between the two, the three of you finally went over to chuuya's place because people in public were staring and concerned, and you were honestly surprised to find out that chuuya happened to live in a penthouse, a luxurious one to be sure. one that reminded you of the hotel resort you once visited with gojo while he was on vacation.

you can't help but gasp and stare around in awe at your surroundings. chuuya's penthouse was actually dark colors and velvet, but it was very pretty and cool to the eyes, as well as spacious enough for you to zoom around as soon as you took off your shoes.

"so, aside from the booze, this is where all your salary goes, huh?" dazai whistled, surveying the entire place, his gaze fixed on the chandelier in the said living room, just above the expensive velvet couch and coffee table.

"your home is very pretty, chuuya-nii!" you exclaimed, twirling around happily.

"thanks, [name]," chuuya chuckled softly, approaching you to pat your head before taking your backpack; "let me just, uh, get your bag, okay? come on, i'll show you where you'll sleep for the night."

dazai followed the two of you, touching everything and bothering chuuya as the said man led you to his bedroom, which was a large master's bedroom. he had a king-sized bed that could easily accommodate four people. he also had a wardrobe, some displays, and other items in there.

"i don't have a guest bedroom for you to stay and sleep in, and i don't want you sleeping on the couch, so yeah," chuuya explained as he placed your bag on the nightstand.

"you have a really big bed. do you sleep here alone and do you have dazai-nii to sleep with you?" you asked, tipping the side of your head.

at that moment, dazai burst out laughing as chuuya, caught off guard by your comment, stumbled backwards and proceeded to smack dazai, "stop laughing and shut the fuck up!"

chuuya proceeded to pat your head regardless of your innocent question, "why the hell would i sleep with that vagabond, c-chibi?"

anyway, moving on from your question. chuuya assisted you in settling into his home. he ran you a warm bubble bath because it was already late, and you were honestly surprised at how large his tub was.

he took out the clothes that your adoptive father, gojo, had packed up for you and hung them in his closet while you were in the bath. in doing so, he and dazai discovered a piece of paper folded between the folded clothes, as well as a phone, which they assumed was yours until the screen opened up, revealing you and gojo together in the wallpaper. chuuya then quickly unfolded the paper only to see a note,

"i don't know how long she'll be there, so i packed her as many clothes as i could in her backpack, please look after her until i call."

"tch, it must be a really serious matter, huh?" chuuya scoffed, unconsciously crumpling the piece of paper with a small scowl at the thought of people wanting to take you and possibly harm you.

"well, considering [name]-chan's ability, or abilities, because she has many to begin with—it's no surprise she'd be viewed as a weapon, or a threat," dazai shook his head, running his fingers through his hair with a sigh.

"but her abilities are not her fault!" chuuya exclaimed, "she's just a child."

"and as a child, she deserves to enjoy her youth. her father is going to hell and back to make that happen, which is why he sent her here to keep her safe for the time being," dazai patted his shoulder.

chuuya exhaled sharply before rising from his bed. he took some of your clothes before leaving dazai in the bedroom and went to the bathroom, knocking first, "chibi, are you done bathing?"

"mhm!" you answered in response.

chuuya entered, putting your clothes by the sink and rolling up his sleeves. "alright, kid, that's enough. let's rinse and get you out before the water gets too cold, okay?" he couldn't help but laugh when he saw you still blowing bubbles and splashing water.

"okay!" you smiled as you let chuuya scrub and rinse your hair with a telephone shower.

chuuya then took you out of the tub and patted you dry with a towel before assisting you in getting dressed in the clothes he chose at random from what gojo packed you. he helped you dry your damp hair with a hairblower and gently combed your hair with a brush in the bathroom after you were dressed. chuuya felt all warm and fuzzy inside because of this very domestic moment between you and him.

is this what it's like to be a parental figure?

chuuya never really had any family in the port mafia, even when he was still a sheep, unless you count the found family that had been taken from him as a teenager when he was still quite new to the mafia—the flags, but that was another story to tell.

anyway, it had been a long time since chuuya had someone to care for, but it made him happy.

"there, you're good to go, chibi," chuuya said proudly, hands on his hips.

you looked in the mirror, smiling at the hairstyle chuuya had given you. he had just tied your hair like his, "i look just like you now! thank you!"

you happily ran back into the bedroom with open arms for dazai, who was about to give you a hug when he realized your hair now looked like chuuya's and immediately got rid of it, causing him and chuuya to fight, with dazai saying, "stop rubbing off your influences on [name]-chan!" and chuuya arguing, "you messed up her hair!" so, yeah. no hairstyling.

chuuya had called a food delivery service after their fight because you still hadn't eaten anything, much to his dismay, and it was getting late; you should be in bed by now.

you and dazai sat in the living room, watching a cartoon show he had put on the television especially for you. chuuya returned to the two of you quickly after getting the food at his door.

you were overjoyed to learn that chuuya had ordered your favorite food. chuuya and dazai both made sure you ate well and that your stomach was full because, once again, you hadn't eaten anything all day. perhaps, with everything going on in your world, you didn't have time to eat, and knowing how expensive your abilities were in terms of energy and stamina, you needed it.

after eating with chuuya and dazai, who were still fighting occasionally in between meals, they both made sure you had brushed your teeth and washed your face before tucking you in bed, especially in chuuya's bed, which you found to be so soft and all comfortable with how thick and warm the pillows and blankets were. chuuya couldn't help but chuckle softly when he saw your stuffies tucked in under the blankets around you in bed.

"goodnight, [name]-chan!" dazai smiled as he leaned down and kissed the top of your head.

"yeah, goodnight chibi," chuuya said next, but unlike dazai, he simply ruffled your hair, too shy to show such affection towards you.

it didn't take you long to fall asleep, given the fact that you were exhausted from your day of exploring and eating at chuuya's penthouse. chuuya forced dazai to sleep on the floor while he took the couch in the living room after leaving you to sleep with the lights turned off.

"ugh, you're so mean chuuya!" dazai huffed at him, "is this how you treat your guests?!"

"only you, mackerel," chuuya clicked his tongue in annoyance, rolling his eyes, "tch, quit your yapping or else you're going to wake [name] up."

"at least give me a pillow, chibi!" dazai cried, snatching the pillow that chuuya was resting his head on and using it instead.

"you shitty bastar—you know what? fine, just take it," chuuya pinched the bridge of his nose, tired from earlier's mission to argue any longer.

even though it was past two o'clock in the morning, dazai couldn't sleep. he was still staring at chuuya's penthouse's hanging lights and chandelier. he had always been up most nights. chuuya, on the other hand, was a light sleeper. so when the two of them heard a cry echoing across the room, they both jumped up.

"that was..." they both muttered.

dazai and chuuya didn't have time to think; as soon as they heard your cry, they dashed into the bedroom to find you. chuuya literally kicked the door open as he heard your cry get louder, thinking you'd been ambushed or something in the middle of the night, but much to his relief, no one else was in the bedroom with you.

but there you were, tossing and turning in your sleep, having been kicked down the stuffies you had with you, as well as the blanket chuuya and dazai had tucked you in, as you let out pained whimpers of cry, red psionics emanating from your unconsciously twitching fingertips.

chuuya's instincts told him to run to you. "[name]! hey! wake up!" he yelled as he ran to your side before dazai could, shaking your form.

"NO! STAY AWAY FROM ME!" you screamed in your sleep as you emitted a small red vapor-like hue of red from your hands, which chuuya had luckily avoided due to his quick reflexes, but you still knocked several shelves and other things over with your repulsive psionics.

"[name]-chan! wake up!"

"kid, come on, wake up!"

dazai and chuuya both cried out for your name. both of their hearts were breaking as they heard you make that painful sound.

the two of them gave you one last shake, allowing you to escape the horrible nightmare you had been subjected to. you looked around the room, disoriented, and took in sharp, quick breaths before returning your gaze to dazai and chuuya, your [eyes] still glowing a faint red color from your emotions amplifying your psionics or chaos magic.

"oh, thank goodness kid," chuuya sighed in relief at the sight of you completely awake, smiling.

"there you are, sweet bella," dazai smiled, now sitting on the other side of you, but his and chuuya's smiles faded as your lips trembled and tears rolled down your cheeks, "[name]-chan?"

as the haunting memory of the nightmare dawned on you, you burst into tears. chuuya and dazai both stiffened. chuuya instinctively opened his arms for you and drew you into his embrace, your breathing becoming erratic as you clung to him desperately, "c-chuuya-nii.. dazai-nii.." you whimpered out.

"shh, it's okay. you're okay, kid," chuuya held you close to his chest, letting you bury your face in the crook of his neck as you cried. dazai rubbed shapes on your back in an attempt to comfort and soothe you down.

"i want my daddy back," you clung to chuuya's shirt even more tightly, shaking your head.

chuuya's eyes widened slightly before softening with dazai's. of course you would still be homesick even if they were with you. despite the fact that dazai and chuuya were your older brothers or family figures in some ways, the fact that you were far away from home, from the world you came from, must have hit you hard given your situation of being unable to return unless your father deemed it safe.

"i'm scared.. they're gonna hurt me.. they're gonna take me away! " you sobbed hard.

"that's not true, [name]-chan," dazai reassured you as he ran his fingers through your hair, "no one will ever hurt you or take you away."

"yeah, not on our watch," chuuya agreed.

you shook your head as you closed your eyes, not wanting to dwell on how everything—the events and screams that occurred within your dreamland—felt. just thinking about it makes you nervous. the windowless, dark room filled with frightening talismans that they claim will keep you and your damned witch abilities at bay, and their sharp words—you hated it.

you held and tugged at each of their sleeves, your lips trembling as you spoke and feeling fresh hot tears glaze your eyes, "s-stay,"

"stay?" dazai and chuuya chorused in confusion.

"please stay with me," you pleaded, looking at them both with puppy-like eyes, desperate for some company and comfort after dealing with a horrible nightmare involving the higher-ups.

dazai and chuuya exchanged glances, both of their eyes widening slightly at your request, but how could they say no? to you in any way?

"we'll stay," dazai said to you softly with a smile.

"do you p-promise? promise that you guys won't leave me?" you drew away from chuuya just enough, staring at each of them with sad puffy red eyes from crying as your sobs turned into sniffles. seeing you like this makes them want to hide you away and keep you from ever being hurt like this again.

"of course, we promise," dazai said, reaching out his hand to you, tucking your hair behind your ear and wiping away your tears, "chuuya and i are here to keep you safe, always."

chuuya then settled you back into bed while dazai picked up the blanket and stuffies you had knocked out earlier together with some of chuuya's shelves and things.

you were then tucked back into bed, but this time you were snuggled up against chuuya's embrace, holding onto his shirt, while dazai snuggled up against you from behind, an arm around you, and you holding onto his sleeve instead. you didn't take long to fall asleep when dazai started humming a soft tune to lull you with, but you still held on to them.

"as if we'd go anywhere," chuuya chuckled softly as he gently patted the back of your head, eyeing your now peaceful face as you slept.

"you know, i can get used to this," dazai exclaimed as he embraced you from behind, pressing his face, particularly his cheek, against your back.

"for once, dazai, i actually agree with you on that," chuuya murmured before yawning.

chuuya eventually fell asleep petting your hair and letting you snuggle up against his chest, as did dazai, who finally fell asleep after a long time of not being able to as he slept and hugged you from behind, his cheek pressed against your back as he held you, with the warmth of the thick and large blanket hovering you three.

[ author's note ! alternative title: soukoku comforts their child who got a nightmare. this has got to be my new favorite writing. honestly wish i had someone or something like for all the times i had nightmares, especially scary sleep paralysis experiences with no one to comfort me, but anyway, heyy ! consider this is my thank you for all the birthday greetings. ]

[chronic-claire-universe]

Love and Shame: Fall and Rise

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Third chapter of Chuuya Nakahara journey’s through parenthood

Warnings: Cursing, Graphic Violence, Blood, 18+

A.N: Reader-chan has the ability to shot people with distanced attacks of power at sound speed, I called it "Power Strike"because it's like a power shot who hit everyone like skittless in bowling.

"A baby? Since when?" Mori says incredulous, "Yes Boss, it's been 4 weeks since Y/N is expecting, I just learned it myself" Chuuya explains serious. "In this regard, Mori-san, I have to tell you that boss welcomes Chuuya and he hopes to grow the alliance between us" Dazai says. "I always thought that one day I had to manage something like this. I'm actually surprised that it took you so long to make the step Chuuya! You'll need some privacy, so I let to you the decision where you want to live with Y/N. I give disposition to protect her and the baby 24 hours a day" Mori concludes "Thanks boss, I'll always be at your service!" Chuuya says bowing his head, Mori can't help but laugh "Ahh youth! I'm so happy to know that we can finally celebrate the alliance under proper conditions. Nee Elise-chan are you happy? Soon you'll have someone who you can play with." Elise smiles and says "I hope they get from Y/N, I always had fun playing with her" Chuuya can't help but smile, remembering the time you arrived here and started to know everyone, you always had the mother attitude protecting everyone, he was sure you were going to be a great mother for his child. "With your permission boss, I have to leave, Y/N is waiting outside and she's not feeling very well" Chuuya says politely and opens the door. "Chuuya! What happened? You staied there for too long" you say crying in desperation, Ozaki can't help but laugh gaining a dirty look from Chuuya "Y/N sorry, I had to explain properly and decide what to do. We're going home, and tomorrow I will come with you in the agency, let's go!" Dazai waves goodbye and Ozaki shouts that she will call in the morning. Once in your apartment Chuuya finally hugs you and says "God Y/N, I'm the happiest man in the world, sorry for making everything complicated. I hope you will trust in me". Next days passed very quickly, Chuuya meet everyone from the agency and talked properly with Dazai and Yosano asking them to give an eye on you since he'll be very occupied. After a week, he barges into the agency and says "I found it! I found it Y/N" raising you to the air "Chu-Chuuya stop it please, what is it? What did you find?" you say alarmed by his excited gaze, he eyes you smiling and says "Come with me". You walked for 20 minutes and here it is, the place in the port where you kissed almost two months ago. "I don't get it Chuuya sorry, we kissed each other here, but what's in here?" you say confused and looking around to find something, Chuuya gently kisses you and shows two keys "Follow me" he says. 10 meters away there is a house with a fantastic view in your special place, he opens the door and says "Welcome home my love" you run to him and you cover him with kisses "Thanks Chuuya, you never fail to amaze me" he closes the door and hug you, a hand on your stomach, blue eyes staring on you "I wish to start our new life in the place where all started. I want to watch this view with you, see our child growing here and stay with you until my last breath" tears floods your face, you don't know if it's because of hormones, but this is the best words he ever told you.

TIME SKIP TO FIFTH MONTH

You did get used living in your home, now it was decorated with photos of you and Chuuya when you were younger a photo showing your belly bump for the first time. Baby's room was equipped with every furnitures you could ask for: baby monitor, CCTV so that Chuuya has an eye on you when he isn't there. Everything was prepared by Yosano and Ozaki who, incredibly, get along very well. "Today we get to discover the gender" you say caressing your  bump who is larger and impossible to hide, "It's a girl" Yosano and Ozaki say in unison, "I don't mind a girl, but I don't know why you are so sure about it". Chuuya arrived in the studio just in time when the secretary called your name. "Good morning Y/N how are you? Mr Nakahara good morning to you too. It seems that your blood tests are fine, continue taking the vitamins and try your best with the diet. Now let's check the baby and the hearthbeat" you lay in the bed and lift your shirt. He gently put the gel and start to examine your uterus. Despite being the fifth time coming to the check-up, you and Chuuya couldn't get used to the ecography, it was amazing to see how your baby was growing and hear the hearthbeat. Chuuya squeezes your hand and says "It's our baby Y/N" "Yeah I know it" you answer smiling. Chuuya excited turns to the doctor and asks "Can we get to know the gender, Doctor Haramaki?" he smiles and says "Well it seems, you're going to have a healthy babygirl!" Chuuya started to cry and hugs you thanking for giving him the best gift he could ask for. Outside the door the female duo get up as soon as they see you out of the room saying "Well?" "We're going to have a daughter" Chuuya says smiling and kissing your forehead. Both of them congratuled you and leave you at home after a promise of going shopping for you and the baby. "Finally some peace" you say while leaving your shoes and jacket and going to the couch, Chuuya follows you still smiling from the excitement and stops in front of your belly "Hey princess, it's dad here, did you missed me? I know that we still have some months to see you but I want to remember you how much I love you" he says and then kiss the belly hearing a kick "Aww, Chuuya she loves you too, I think she will be a totally daddy's girl". Chuuya smiled at your statement and says "Y/N we have to think of a name for her", "I think this is your honor, I'm sure that whatever you'll choose, I'll love it" you say leaving Chuuya speechless. Despite being always there for you, he helped through every morning sickness, he always found whatever you were craving, even it was 3 in the morning. He thought that he wasn't doing enough because he had to work. Insecurity still took prevail of him sometimes, so you thought that giving him the right to choose your daughter's name could be something important for him and for the bond with her, and apparently you get it right.

TIME SKIP TO SEVENTH MONTH

"Y/N try to be rational! You can't go on mission in this condition, it's enough that I accepted you to continue your work despite the risk that there is staying in here." Chuuya shouts at you, "Condition? Which condition Chuuya? Are you implying that I'm a whale? But I can do my work even if I'm that!". Mood swings are the worst part of pregnancy, not even Dazai had the courage to face you in this condition so he found himself forced to call Chuuya to calm you down. In the morning when you arrived in the agency, you found Naomi talking with Tanizaki and Atsushi about a letter, when you greeted them and hear their  sudden silence you knew that something had happened. You didn't knew if it was for your hormones or maybe because they have mercy for your appearance but they gave you a letter. It seemed that someone from your and Chuuya past is trying to attempt for your life because you betrayed them for Port Mafia. And so we arrive at the present, where Chuuya shouts at you that you can't go to kill someone being seven month pregnant. "I know it Chuuya, but I feel useless. Everyone around me is working hard and always protect me when you're not there. I'm tired and I cannot stand that they have to risk more because of my past life choices" you say crying and exhausted, it's true hormones get out the worst of you, but what you said isn't a lie and Chuuya, Dazai and Atsushi understand it very well. "Excuse me Chuuya, if it's a not a problem for you, Y/N can come with me and help me with this task. I have to bring this briefcase to someone who Y/N knows better than me" Chuuya smiles and says "Did you hear Atsushi, my love? He needs your help" you turn to face everyone and say "Excuse me for this mess, Atsushi I'll be pleased to accompany you". Chuuya smiles and kisses you a goodbye, he leaves talking with Dazai about something. After a moment Dazai comes back "Sorry Y/N, I didn't want to bother you, I hope you understand" he says politely "It's ok Dazai, you know me, I screw up for everything in the last times", he smiles and go away. Atsushi  arrives and says "Let's go Y/N, it's a lot of time that we don't have a task together!". Atsushi's liveliness always manage to brighten your mood so while walking in the promenade near your home says "Y/N, you know, since I came here, the one who gave me the strenght to move on my past is you. I want to remember you whatever happened in your past, you don't have to feel guilty about it. After all, that past made you meet us, Chuuya, and without him your daughter wouldn't be here inside you" he says touching your belly, she kicks almost like answering to what Atsushi said, "Wow amazing" is the only thing he can think of, "I think that she's saying hello to you and thanking for your kind words, Atsushi" you say caressing your belly. Suddenly from afar you hear a noise and Atsushi jumps in front of you trying to protect you. You barely hit them in time with your Power Strike, most of them fall to the ground unconscious, but before you try to attack again blood covers your clothes. "Say goodbye to that fuckin bastard and this child" someone says while you loose consciouness and you see someone arriving. Everything is black, blood everywhere, but Yosano and Dazai arrive just in time to provide first aid "Chuuya is going to kill us if we don't save both of them" Dazai knows it but decide to ignore, "Let's take them to the hospital and get treat them together" Dazai says coldly trying to figure out the best way to find a solution. Meanwhile an ambulance arrive and charge both you and Atsushi "Stay with them, I'm going to find their place and call Chuuya as soon I know that things are gettin better" Dazai says, leaving a confused Yosano who tries everything to stop your cerebral hemmorhage and Atshushi's wounds "Both of you survive please, Y/N especially you".  Chuuya's POV: "Where is she? Y/N! I want to see her". Half an hour ago Dazai called me saying that Y/N is in the hospital. "Stop trying to block me, I want to see her. I blow your fucking head if you stop me again. I'm serious Dazai!", I couldn't stand to stay here and wait to know something about her. "They're checking on her and your daughter, be patient. When she arrived the doctor assured us that she isn't in life threatening condition and Yosano is inside to help her get through it. She's not alone" Dazai tries to explain me, that him and Yosano followed her because they suspected that Y/N have been followed for days, they provided her assistance as soon as she passed out  "I can't stand the thought to live without her Dazai, not even without my daughter. I need to be with her every minute of my life and cherish her. If she dies know that the next to follow her is you, believe it!". Although my threat Dazai seems to be unimpressed, he just pat my head and points to a exhausted Yosano "Chuuya, you can see her, but I have to say you something before. Both Y/N and daughter are safe, it seems that we don't need to induce the labor. She's unconscious but their vitals are stable. Thanks Atsushi for protecting her from the attack" "Thanks Yosano, I'll place my gratitude to you and Atsushi for helping her to survive this attack, I owe you millions". When I enter the vision is unbearable, I can only think to beat the hell out of the bastard who made this to her, "Y/N I'm here, I hope you wake up soon, I need you to be the brave woman I felt in love with. Please be strong for us and our princess" I can't stand this view, oxygen to help her breath, while I see Atsushi finally recovering in the bed next her "Chuuya, you're here. I tried my best to protect her, but in the end she was the one who did the most. When I stepped in front of her to protect she threw a tremendous offense to the people attacking us, she's strong, you're lucky to have her" I smile and say "Atsushi I know it, but if it wasn't for your protection my daughter and Y/N wouldn't be here. I owe you everything. Now I'll leave you, we have to bring this story to an end". Going outside the room I give a last sight to Y/N, "Boss, apparently someone who survived from my last affiliation, tried to kill Y/N and Atsushi. They want to take revenge from us and the agency, mind if I take the executives with me?" I ask while walking with Dazai to find their place,  "You better kill all of them to have tried hideous actions, Port Mafia doesn't accept this outrage!" Mori says sternly giving  ok to Ozaki and Akutagawa who start to run after hearing the call from the office . Narrator POV: It was a bloodshed, Ozaki and Akutagawa never saw Chuuya fighting like this, everyone who tried to near him ended up screaming and dying painfully, Chuuya was insane and Dazai didn't do anything to stop his powers and control his body. Battle lasted small amount of time, Ozaki couldn't stand the people who tried to attack you and reduced Chuuya in nothing but a cruel hitman, "Dazai stop him he's going to die if he continue to fight like this" Ozaki screams desperately while using her Golden Demon to stab every enemy in front of her. Everyone loosed the sense and killed every enemy by beating them almost to death and torturing until beg for their mercy, they shot the death blow. But Shirase manages to survive, despite the treatment and says "I saw  that finally you knocked up Y/N, a bastard and a whore till the end" Chuuya couldn't accept these words and leaving his gloves, he starts to smash the defenseless boy,  who dies disfigured and covered in fluids everywhere "You can't fuckin said this to me, you betrayed me! Die fuckin bastard, die and remember my face when you go to hell" Chuuya screams still beating the cold body and ruining his face even more, "Chuuya calm, he's dead. Don't  hold a grudge for a useless person like that. Y/N wouldn't want this from you, she deserves a better boyfriend and a better father for your daughter" Ozaki says, "It's over let's go to see Y/N" Dazai says offering a hand to the still shocked man.

TIME SKIP NINTH MONTH

It took you half a day to wake up, Chuuya eyes lighted up when he saw you conscious again. Recovering psychologically took, both you and Chuuya, a little bit more. Somehow your daughter managed to give you again the strenght to battle and move on the accident. In the meantime you arrived to the last month of your pregnacy, which meant only one thing,  pain and impatience. Nearing the due date Chuuya took work leaves to be with you when the time will come. It's autumn and you can't help but look from the balcony the promenade full of red trees, "You know baby, between you and me, I hope you'll take the same look of your father. I hope you'll be the best Red Princess out there, so that everyone will be able to see your beauty and cherish it, just like I cherish this autumn red trees. Sooner or later we will see them, all the three of us, I can't wait to meet you" you heard in response a kick from her . "Y/N what are you doing out there?" Chuuya says covering you with a blanket and caressing your belly "Just admiring the view, today she's very active" you say, Chuuya giggles "Hey princess, it's dad, we're almost there, a day or a week and I can hold you in my arms and show you this beatiful world that I'll keep safe just for you and your mom. I love you" suddenly a sharp pain take you "Y/N what is it?" Chuuya asks concerned, until you feel your pants and the blanket wet "Chuuya she's coming, I'm going into labor!"

A.N: Next chapter will be dedicated to birth! Hope you appreciated the effort until now!

[kageyamaana]

Day 7- Free Day: Family(Chuuya x Atsushi)

Atsushi still asks herself what made her life become what it was now. She was married, had four kids, had a lot of nephews/nieces and was happy as she could never be before.

When she was born she was a baby boy born to two teens that didn’t want any kid but were forced to have her since her mother’s parents forced them to do it. Two months after she was born she was left in an orphanage and since there she lived in a bad place but when they found out about Byakko the place became hell and she was lucky to never have told them that she was a girl in a boy’s body and that luckily she was a beta because if not she would have died or worse. Then she was kicked out and she had been so happy to finally be able to be herself until she started getting hungry and didn’t have nothing to eat and in the end meeting Dazai was really a miracle that she thanked for happening.

It was after dealing with Shibusawa that she finally met Dazai’s ex-partner Nakahara Chuuya and telling the truth she was sure she blushed the moment she saw the handsome alpha(she knows that thanks to Ryuu who is always telling her that) and who can blame her if she was totally her type, at least in appearance, with long auburn hair, a well defined body, an elegant posture, strong and had the most beautiful blues Atsushi had ever seen. Oh, but from what Kouyo-nee told her she was the only one that thought something like that because Kouyou-nee one time when they meet on their free day she talked with her about how Chuuya when super drunk wouldn’t stop talking about the beta apprentice of Dazai who had short silver hair with a single black lock, a body that wasn’t too feminine but that looks perfect in her, an innocent but also dangerous vibe around her and the most pretty sunset colored eyes he ever saw or better he never saw anyone with such pretty colored eyes as her. Atsushi blushed so much that day but also Kouyou-nee became her confident and person to go when she needed help about herself(sometimes she asked Yosano and Naomi for help but Kouyou had such an elegant form that Atsushi wanted to be like her). It took two years until Atsushi was able to confess her feelings and it was all because of an ability that belonged to someone who asked them for help and basically that person’s ability made other people confess and was called Cupid. Well she wasn’t the only one affected and it was quite surprising all the confessions that were made that day.

The first affected one was Kenji who didn’t confess to anyone since he never loved anyone like that only as friends and family, then it was Ranpo who confessed to Edgar which ended with a blushing and worried Ranpo and a fainted Edgar(the next day Ranpo announced that they were dating), after Ranpo it was Naomi who surprisingly confessed to both Higuchi and Kaiji(Higuchi blushed and Kaiji was so surprised that he laughed nervously but in the end the three decided to try and date and see were it would take them), the first person from Port Mafia to be affected was Mori who unsurprisingly for some people confessed to Fukuzawa who looked surprised(he never believed before when Mori said that Fukuzawa was the only person that Mori ever loved but let’s be real who would believe it when you see Mori’s ability? No one), next it was Tachihara who confessed to Tanizaki and well after that no one saw them until evening the next day and finally the last person was Atsushi who luckily confessed to Chuuya were no one could see them(it was almost night and Chuuya was near a park Atsushi liked to go on her free time and Atsushi confessed there and Chuuya was surprised before blushing and saying he liked Atsushi back).

That was the start of their relationship and of course it wasn’t all roses but it was perfect for both of them even with their insecurities. The time that Atsushi most feared that Chuuya would leave her was when she told him that she was trans but Chuuya only said that he didn’t care because he loved her no matter what(it was also the first time they said that they loved each other). There were a lot of things that almost made their relationship especially their works but in the end they resolved everything and stayed strong together.

Telling the truth Atsushi was still surprised when Chuuya asked her in marriage in her birthday because yes he said he loved her above anything but she still thought that someday he would wake up and realise that there was a better person for him then her so yes she cried when he asked her in marriage and she was so happy(he asked her in marriage in the place were they had their first date that was in an amusement park which also was the first time that she had gone to an amusement park). Maybe the part she liked the most about they relationship until now was their vows and a lot of times they said it again to each other even if they were short vows they meant everything for both of them(Atsushi’s made of honor were Kouyou-nee, Yosano, Kyoka and Lucy while Chuuya’s groomsmen were Dazai, Michizou, Kenji and Hirotsu).

Today when Atsushi woke up Chuuya was already wake and was looking at her which made blush and he smiled when seeing that before saying her favorite words that have ever left his mouth that were directioned to her besides ‘I love you’.

“I fell in love with the most unexpected person at the most unexpected time but I will never regret it because I know you will always be by my side no matter what as I will be by yours. I love you my sweet kitten” whispered Chuuya smiling softly before kissing Atsushi who after the kiss said her vow

“The first time I met you I really liked you but as I met you the only thing in my mind was I want him to come and get me without hesitation or contemplation, I want him to run as fast as he can and when he gets here I never want to let him go because he was ther perfect person for even with all his flaws. I love you my dear god” said Atsushi back and she giggled because she loved this moments

That were one of the best moments of them together and Atsushi will never regret any of her choices especially now, in the evening, when she watched her family being happy in her birthday. Dazai was irritating Kunikida while Ryuu, Kunikida’s husband, and Fyodor, Dazai’s fiance even after five kids together they still weren’t married, and right next to them there were Yosano, Kouyou and Haruno(most still can’t believe that this three are married) just talking about their kids and their nephews/nieces who were all playing together. Fukuzawa and his husband, Mori, were watching the babies and you could see how happy they were together and in a couch near them you could see Edgar and Ranpo cuddling with their youngest kid in the middle of them. Not far away from were Atsushi was she could see her little sister Kyouka talking with her fiances, Gin and Kenji, while she had Ryuu’s youngest daughter in her lap sleeping and in the food table you could watch Naomi gossiping with Junichirou while their spouses talked between themselves(Michizou and Kaiji) or just ate since they had been much hungry during this pregnancy then the others(Higuchi) and also in the same table you could see Hirotsu taking pictures of everyone. They were all there and telling the truth Atsushi could never be more happy than this and if someone asked her if she would change anything in her life especially her life at the orphanage she would say no since she would never have meet all this people if she changed her past.

“Hey sweetheart” whispered someone while putting his arms around her waist and Atsushi didn’t need to look to know it was her husband

“Chuuya” said Atsushi looking at her husband who smiled before giving her a kiss

“It is almost time to blow the candles and it is better to go now before Mackerel eats or destroys the cake, again” said Chuuya looking irritated with what Dazai had done in all the past birthdays and she giggled

“It’s okay I have everything I need here starting with you and ending in our children” whispered Atsushi leaning against Chuuya and looking fondly to everyone before smiling when she saw Dazai picking her birthday cake and when everyone saw that some of them started going after him

“I will be back soon sweetheart” whispered Chuuya kissing her neck before going after Dazai like some other people “HEY STUPID MACKEREL PUT THE CAKE WHERE IT WAS” shouted Chuuya furious

Atsushi observed everything and she couldn’t stop her laugh when Dazai tripped and fell in the floor with the cake and the ones who followed him looked furious at him before everyone joined her at laughing at Dazai. He didn’t look like he was sorry and Atsushi knew it especially when Dazai looked at her and winked because they both knew that he did that in all of her birthdays because he wanted to make sure she was happy and because he knew that she loved to see everyone laughing together. In the end it was all thanks to Dazai that Atsushi had a family and she was grateful for that but she also knew how much of an idiot and bastard he was so he should be waiting for whatever she would plan as a vengeance for his birthday because in the end this became a little game between two siblings and neither of them would give up.

“Mama if Uncle Osamu hadn’t destroyed the cake what would have been your wish?”

“None”

“Eeehhh! Why?”

“Because I have all I need already. I have a great husband, four incredible kids and a big family who I know that loves me as much as I love them”

“We love you Mama”

“I love you too my little babies”

Her kids were the best especially because they were a miracle that was given to them by her caring ability. Byakko was what made her able to have kids even if she was born male and was beta so she was happy that in the end she had accepted her ability as part of her. Fumiya, Miyako, Shirase and Yue where her four babies and she was proud of them and she loved them so much and was sad that someday they would leave her nest to create their own.

“Happy birthday sweetheart”

“Thank you Chuuya”

“What would you like as your gift?”

Atsushi looked around her seeing her kids saying goodbye to her uncles and cousins but nothing came to her mind until she saw Ryuu picking his baby(the youngest son) and she finally had decided what she wanted. She leaned to Chuuya and whispered what she wanted which made Chuuya smile before they had gone to say goodbye to their family and friends and put their children to bed.

For @bsd-rarepairweek​

[no-longer-tainted]

Roomate AU + Accidental Eavesdropping

12 - Roommate AU58 - Accidental Eavesdropping

Everyone knew that Dazai and Chuuya pinned for each other since the first day of college and them running into each other for the first time while finding out they’re roommates. 

However, there were two people who didn’t know about it. 

Nakahara Chuuya.

Dazai Osamu. 

Atsushi had asked Kyouka and Akutagawa for help to get them together but they were starting to lose hope in getting them together before they’d graduated from college. 

“Chuuya-san’s crush on Dazai-san is obvious. Why do they don’t see it themselves?”, Atsushi asked Kyouka and looked at her. 

Kyouka shrugged her slim shoulders. 

“They’re both idiots.” This was all Akutagawa had to say after Plan A - Z had failed to get them together. It hadn’t even worked out to push them both into the broom closet.

“But Dazai-san always looks so soft at Chuuya, too!” Atsushi gestured with his hands and hit his hand on the table.

That both of them were standing right in front of the open window, having red faces and not being able to look at each other was of course part of the plan “A5158″.

Kyouka walked towards the window of her room, knowing that the duo would pass it around lunchtime and smiled at them. “Chuuya-nii! Dazai-san! Nice to see you too!” 

They both looked at each other before Chuuya looked towards Kyouka, sighing. “When did you get that mischevious side?”

“We both got raised by Kouyou-nee. You should know.”

[bungostraydoggos]

May I request some imagines of Chuuya, Atsushi, and Tanizaki comfort their scared and sad fem s/o? I have had a terrible day and nee cheering up. Thank you

Oh gosh, I’m sorry that you’re not having a good day. Hopefully, you’ll enjoy this and make you smile at the end :)

Nakahara Chuuya

“Hey, do you think she’s doing okay?” The sudden question snapped out of Chuuya’s work mode. He set some papers down while giving the golden demon wielder a quizzical look.  “What do you mean doing okay? Is there something wrong with her?” After a few minutes of explaining, it appears to be Chuuya’s significant other hasn’t been feeling well lately. Her expressions has been sullen and her sighs has become heavy. Clearly, she doesn’t feel well.  “Haven’t you noticed?” Chuuya shook his head at Kouyou’s question. She shakes her head in disappointment.  “You’re a horrible boyfriend--” “--I am not!”Chuuya quickly interjects with an angry response. To the Port Mafia gentleman’s dismay, it’s true that he hasn’t noticed his lover’s blue state, but it’s all because of his busy work that he hasn’t been properly noticing as a good boyfriend should. Gradually, a tinge of guilt creeps inside him.  “I’m leaving. Please finish my work.” With that, Chuuya swiftly left the office and began heading towards to his motorcycle. Before he drove off to his destination, he sent a quick text to his partner, telling her to meet him outside of their apartment in ten minutes. Although, it only took five minutes for Chuuya to arrive at their place. When his girlfriend came down from the complex, Chuuya gestures to get behind him on the motorcycle while giving her a smirk that showed he has a special surprise for her. Moments later, Chuuya and his partner arrived at what seemed to be an arcade.  “Did you bring me to an arcade?” she asks him. “Yeah, what else would it be? Come on!” Chuuya grabs her soft hand and pulls her into the land of games. Several hours has passed since their arrival, and the couple played numerous street-fighter matches, skeeballs, air hockey, and water gun race. It was only until the two got in to a picture booth that they got to unwind a bit. “Let’s take picture to commemorate this day.”  About four shots were taken and each shot had Chuuya giving peace signs and kisses on his significant other’s cheeks. When they got out of the booth, she turned to Chuuya, “hey, why did you suddenly bring me out to the arcade? Didn’t you have work today?”  Chuuya kinda fidgets before answering her question. “Well, I heard that, I mean, I’ve noticed that you’ve been down in the dumps so I thought maybe we could have fun together...” He slightly blushes at the cheesiness of which he said. “You did have fun, right?” His partner couldn’t help but to giggle. She did have fun and if anything, it’s as if all her stress and anxiousness has disappeared thanks to her considerate boyfriend.  “I sure did. Thank you, Chuuya.” With that, she gives a kiss against Chuuya’s lips, and they both leave with bright smiles on their faces. 

Nakajima Atsushi

For once in a long time, Atsushi and his girlfriend got to go out alone together. He didn’t want to pressure her in taking her somewhere extravagant so they were at the Uzumaki cafe where they were both comfortable. Drinking warm coffee, Atsushi begins to talk about his recent moments with Dazai and simply complaining how much he’s been lazy at work. He keeps talking and ranting until he noticed his partner gazing at the window while halfheartedly responding okays through the conversation. Atsushi studies her sullen expression. It’s an expression he knows all too well, and he could immediately tell that there was something wrong. The were-tiger takes a moment before carefully forming his words, “are you okay?”. His question brought her back to his attention and with a simple shrug and a thin smile, they only nodded. Atsushi could tell that his partner didn’t want to talk about it and for him, it was okay because he understands. But still, it doesn’t mitigate the heavy guilt and sadness he feels while he sees his beloved one in gloom. He needed to do something---anything that could at least cheer her up even if it’s the slightest. At this moment, Atsushi gazes out the window and sees a familiar scene. It gave him a wonderful idea that could cheer his lover up. He checks the time, 9:00PM--- perfect.  Atsushi quickly pays the coffee bill and takes his significant other outside. Her eyes widen at the suddenness and she asks him where he is taking her. He said nothing but with a smile, “it’s a secret.” Not too long, Atsushi brings his girlfriend to what looks like a tall abandoned building. In truth, they felt a little scared and confused in coming to a place like this. She asks Atsushi once again, “where are we?” He looks at her with a playful grin and carries her bridal style. Before she could process anything, Atsushi activates his Beast Beneath the Moonlight and his tiger-legs carried him over the roof of the tall building. The girl slowly opens her eyes and meets the beautiful night scenery before her. All the lights of Yokohama glowed like dazzling fireflies and stars beamed like it was the sun itself. The cool breeze felt like a misty touch and Atsushi’s warmth filled her chest with fuzziness. She felt her expression shifting from sullenness to happiness.  “Finally, a smile.” Atsushi’s voice made her look at him with glossy eyes and slight tears. She could see her own reflection in his grey eyes. HIs kind gaze made her swell with emotions. She understood that he was trying to cheer her up with this beautiful scenery. Atsushi pulls her face closer to his and with that, he gave a quick kiss on the crown of her head, reassuring her that he is here with her no matter the sadness and gloominess she feels. 

Tanizaki Junichirou

When Tanizaki was about to head on home after a long day at work, Naomi clings onto her brother, begging him to go late night karaoke with her. “Come on! We haven’t had fun in so long. Let’s go, brother!” Tired as he was, he tries to reject Naomi’s invitation and simply go home to get some shut-eye, but that all changed when Tanizaki’s significant other came out of the agency. Her stressed and moody expression caught his eye. Frankly speaking, work hasn’t been easy as of lately, but it seemed like there was something more happening especially with Tanizaki’s lover behind that cloudy face. Naomi was right. It’s been so long since they had any fun, and this is the only chance where they can have a good time before another detective job pops up. Tanizaki made up his mind, “you know what, Naomi? Let’s go to karaoke but we have to invite my girlfriend too.” Although a little reluctant, Naomi agreed. After thirty minutes, the trio gets into a karaoke room. Tanizaki invited his partner over to sing with his sister. So far, their sad expression is still on their face and for Tanizaki, his hopes of cheering her up runs on a thin line.  “Hey, I’m sorry for inviting you over when you’re so tired,” Tanizaki tries to initiate a conversation as Naomi sings one of her favorite pop songs.  “It’s alright. It’s nice to go out like this sometimes so...” Tanizaki frowns at her disinterest and sullen tone. There must be something going on but he has no courage to ask. After Naomi finishes about five songs, she elatedly asks Tanizaki’s significant other if there’s anything she would like to sing. Of course, with the cloudy mood hanging above their heads, Tanizaki quickly interjects that he’ll sing something instead. Naomi blinks in utter surprise and tries to stop her brother, but it was already too late when Tanizaki began to sing September by Earth, Wind & Fire. When the music cued, Tanizaki’s girlfriend’s eyes widened at the horrible sound. She couldn’t believe her ears. Tanizaki was singing with horrible intonation. He had zero sense of pitch, and his robotic movements matched with the terrible singing voice. His eyes began to swirl due to nervousness, sweat, and exhaustion. As this kept going, Tanizaki’s girlfriend couldn’t help but to boisterously laugh at the funny sight. She didn’t expect him to have a god-awful talent at singing. It was absolutely silly, and she smiled at his nerve-wrecking state.  “I tried to stop him!” Naomi covers her ears in distress.  When the song finally finished, Tanizaki witnesses his girlfriend’s familiar laughter and smile. He puts away the mic while continuing to look at her happy expression.  Guess the late night karaoke was worth it.

[avereas]

the antonym of flower

Port Mafia Week Day 5: Childhood

summary: Nakahara Chuuya meets Dazai Osamu in freefall, and Dazai makes a proposal. word count: 2.1k

read on ao3

“Damn you.”

“What?”

“What’d you have to do that for?”

Wrong-footed, Chuuya stares at Dazai Osamu. The boy is a skinny little thing: scrawny, quite pitiful. His hair is a wind-blown mess. He looks like he makes a fruitless habit of fighting monsters much larger than himself. 

Or something like that, anyway.

“I was just trying to—“ Chuuya trails off. 

“Just trying to what?” Dazai Osamu scowls at him. There’s a flicker of something ugly in his uncovered eye, wide and dark against his white face. He wears an armour of bandages, as though the tape is binding together the remnants of a shattered doll. Up close, this is all rather unsettling.

Chuuya has never seen anything quite like him, before.

Chuuya has never felt anything quite like this, either: pulverised, drained, like the vestiges of wetness wrung from a used towel. He lets himself slump against the concrete wall of the alleyway, the night air cold as it threads through the sweat in his hair. The lullaby of Yokohama traffic lures him to the threshold of sleep. He pulls his coat tightly around himself.

“Hey, gingerhead, I’m talking to you.”

“Whatever. I don’t care what you do.” The awareness of pain hits Chuuya like the drop into freefall. He groans and lets his head fall back; Dazai Osamu’s hand hovers in the air and does not follow. Chuuya realises that Dazai Osamu had been, for some reason, touching his face. A grotesque feeling is spreading from the phantom sensation of warmth, crawling through his body like poisoned honey. He feels sick. He feels empty. Nevertheless: “Next time you should throw yourself into the sea, instead. No one will be forced to see your smashed-up corpse then.”

A rustle of clothing, and then silence. Suspiciously, Chuuya cracks open an eye. 

Dazai Osamu’s face hovers above his own, and he’s close enough that strands of his dark hair tickle Chuuya’s cheek. Chuuya tenses. 

“That’s a great idea!” Dazai Osamu suddenly seems unduly excited. “If I jump from a cliff, do you think the impact of hitting the water would be enough to kill me, or would that only make me unconscious until I eventually drown?”

“Ugh.” Chuuya closes his eye and turns away. “What the fuck. Go away already.”

“Sorry, no can do! You know, I just wanted to kill myself. I didn’t expect some idiot to come jumping after me. But still, you gave me such a useful tip! Of course, at the least, I’ll have to see you home safely. That’s fair, right?”

No, Chuuya means to say, it’s this time of the year, I don’t want to deal with Ane-san now, but the abject exhaustion steals the syllables from his mind. He opens his mouth anyway.

Before he remembers verbalising anything, though, arms close around him. The incongruous warmth is suddenly very welcoming. 

…

Sunlight presses insistently into his eyelids, and reluctantly, he draws himself from oblivion. He stares at his surroundings.

A white-washed room: bare, minimally furnished with a wardrobe, a chest of drawers and a double bed. He finds himself in the latter, bundled between white sheets. The open blinds of the single window paint stripes on the opposite wall; it is the only disruption to the spartan economy of the place. Gingerly, Chuuya pushes himself out from the covers. 

There is the thump of fallen fabric, and he turns in surprise to see his outerwear and gloves fanned out onto the floorboards. He picks them up from their folded arrangement and idly shrugs on his coat, frowning slightly at the unfamiliar shirt that he finds himself wearing. Then, brazenly, he continues to the drawers. 

One by one, he silently pulls them out: folded underclothes, coiled belts, boxes of cufflinks, rolled-up socks. Unopened packets of bandages fill an entire compartment, neatly stacked. He moves onto the wardrobe and finds it much the same: suit jackets, dress shirts, trousers are draped on hangers equidistant from each other. A small rack displays a selection of identical black ties. Altogether, a colourless rainbow; immaculate, as though from a catalogue.

Chuuya stands back from the furniture and stares at them for a while.

He finds Dazai Osamu sprawled on the floor in what appears to be the main living space of the residence, paper maps spread out all about him. He looks up as soon as Chuuya steps out from the bedroom.

“What is this place?”

“Well, you see, Chuuya,” Dazai says, drawing out his name in tuneless song. Chuuya stiffens at the assumed familiarity. “Last night, I didn’t particularly want to deal with Kouyou-nee-san and her whole mother duck act. So I took you to my apartment instead! You can make your explanations to her yourself.”

Chuuya stares at him for a moment, before the rage flashes up his spine, red-hot. “Make my explanations? You say that like I wasn’t there trying to save your stupid ass from becoming dead human pancake. She’s going to be pissed as hell that I didn’t go home at all last night." He pauses to take a breath. "What did you do to me, anyway?”

Dazai’s beam doesn’t waver, even as he extracts Chuuya’s mobile phone from his pocket and waves it around. “You do have a couple of missed calls.”

Chuuya scowls. “You even had the fucking nerve to go through my stuff. Give it back.”

Dazai shrugs and throws it at him.

Five missed calls and seven text messages. In spite of the anger that he’s sure to find in them, Chuuya swallows at Kouyou’s evident concern. He tries to draft up the optimum responses to her questions, but there is only really one thing he could say: I saw Dazai Osamu jumping from the top of headquarters, but I don’t know why I jumped after him. 

Put like that, there is no conceivable way he could escape Kouyou’s wrath.

“If it’s any consolation, yesterday was a particularly difficult anniversary for your ane-san. That’s probably why she was especially worried.” Chuuya glances at Dazai, but Dazai has returned to his diligent study of his papers. “She’ll be feeling a little silly now, so she’ll go easy on you when you— when you get home.”

“How do you know that?”

Dazai looks up at him and smiles. The light reflects off his dark eyes, like a cat’s.

Chuuya grits his teeth and growls, “What do you know about her that I don’t?” but Dazai simply swings himself upwards and and pulls his arms into a stretch. Chuuya notices a brown-streaked shirt crumpled on the arm of the couch, and irritation wars with curiosity until he gives in.

“Got into a fight?” Chuuya nods at the garment.

“Oh. That’s…” Dazai is staring at him a little oddly. “That’s not mine.”

“It sure looks like one of your boring shirts.” Too late, Chuuya wonders if that gives away his snooping in the closet. Oh, well. He wanders closer and drops down on the other end of the couch. 

“It’s not my blood.” Dazai picks it up gingerly between two fingers. “Do you remember what happened last night?”

“What kind of question is that? I only used my ability to save a suicidal maniac and now I feel like I’ve been hit by a car.”

Dazai’s eyes are keen. “Using your ability feels like that?”

Chuuya scowls. “No. It’s never been like this before. It feels even worse than when Ane-san pushes me really hard during training.”

“Training?” Dazai murmurs. “And how is that going?”

"It's going fine!"

Dazai smiles faintly, a gesture appearing to be borne more of habit than of emotion. “That badly, huh...” he murmurs, and serenely ignores Chuuya’s aggrieved “I didn’t say that!”

Dazai’s stare is uncanny as he absently balls up the shirt. He hums in acknowledgement and glances away, gaze blank even as his eyes skim the maps on the ground. 

Curiosity wins again, so Chuuya asks, “Were you working on something for Mori-san?”

“Hm?” Dazai’s gaze sharpens and he finally seems to notice the maps around him. His lips curve down in sudden glumness. “Oh, no. I was just checking out some suicide destinations, you know. Turns out that there aren’t really any cliffs nearby. But Toujinbou does sound really cool, so I was thinking of a holiday—”

Chuuya stares at him silently.

…

The whole experience was rather bizarre. Later, Chuuya tries to forget it all. 

As luck — or some other manipulative force — would have it, two months later Chuuya runs into Dazai Osamu again. He has now acquired a set of walking crutches and a stack of thick textbooks, and has commandeered the table of one of the conference rooms in the headquarters. Chuuya immediately considers turning right around and exiting, but Dazai has already looked up at the noise.

Instead, Chuuya asks, “Why the fuck are you reading about quantum mechanics?”

“I’m trialling another method of suicide.”

“Right.”

Dazai glances down again as he turns a page. “I wanted to see if it was possible to bore myself to death. But this is too painful. It’s not worth it. Suicides should be enjoyable, shouldn’t they?”

“I’m just going to go,” Chuuya says. “Goodbye, nice seeing that you haven’t offed yourself yet, I guess, whatever—”

“No, no,” Dazai cuts in. He smiles at Chuuya and in that split-second, he looks so young. “Stay. Sit down.”

“What for?”

“I want to talk to you.”

Chuuya pulls out a chair and warily takes a seat. “So talk.”

“How would you feel,” Dazai says, placing a hand underneath his chin and flipping another text-heavy page casually, “about being my partner?”

“Your partner?”

“That’s what I said, didn’t I?” Dazai flicks his eyes up at him, as though bored. “Mori-san will be the next boss. I’m the mafia’s best strategist. I can help you with your ability.”

“What.” Chuuya says this flatly. He doesn’t even know where to begin to address Dazai’s statements, each one as ludicrous as the next.

“Gravity manipulation, right?” Dazai nods at the books. “I’m afraid that the current science has yet to catch up with the specifics, but I think I have an adequate understanding of how your ability should work. I also have the ability of nullification. I can ensure that nothing like what happened to you two months ago happens again.”

Chuuya stares at him, nonchalant and aloof, lounging in the chair in front of the panorama of the Yokohama bay. He carefully tries to avoid thinking about that night two months ago, but the terror rushes to his throat as though he is watching the scene unfold in front of him now. The fall of the slight figure, as though in slow motion— the wind flapping through his coat, the bile in his mouth as his fingers missed the other’s hand. Serendipity made it so that this failing ensured his survival: if he had made contact with Dazai, For The Tainted Sorrow would have been nullified and they both would have splattered onto the streets of Yokohama. But because he missed, he had done— done something and then spent the next week recovering from whatever it was, but.

But they were both alive. He didn’t fail. Not really. Well, from his own perspective, anyway, even if Dazai's peaceful face haunted his nightmares during sleepless nights.

He says, “Choose another partner. If what you said is true, I’m sure there’s someone who’s interested.”

Dazai frowns at him. “I want you.”

“Well, I’m not fucking interested.”

Dazai stares at him in silence. After a few moments, he says, “Back then, when you jumped after me like a fool. You shouldn’t have been able to use your ability on me.” 

“I didn’t use my damn ability on you,” Chuuya snaps. “I couldn’t even touch you, could I?”

Dazai smiles. “So how did you do it?” 

Chuuya looks away, into the glare of the afternoon sun. “I don’t know.”

Dazai is still staring at him. After a moment, he says, “This is my hypothesis. For The Tainted Sorrow is a gravity manipulation ability. But there is another form of your ability which is far stronger and exceedingly more dangerous. If we can figure out how you can use that, you’ll be an unstoppable force.”

Chuuya blanches, half at the suggestion, half at the distinctly-remembered pain. “Do you even hear yourself? First you say that you’ll make sure that nothing like that happens again. Then you say that you want to figure out how it works.”

The smile has entirely faded from Dazai’s face. Now he just looks back at him, expression grim and betraying nothing. 

Finally, Chuuya says, “Just tell me why you did it.”

Dazai Osamu had the grace not to pretend at ignorance, but Chuuya knew that the tilt of his lips promised nothing but bullshit. “The lights were really pretty that night,” is what Dazai says. “I was just thinking that I liked this city a lot.”

[yatokamiii]

Reason living

so this is kind of a part two of forever with you but it can be read by itself

title credit to @aja154ever

basically soukoku wedding day fanfic that I wanted to write

“Chuuya-” Kouyou knocked lightly on the lightly colored wood door. “Chuuya honey it’s time to wake up.” She continued as she stepped over to wear the little redhead slept and lightly shook his shoulder. After a few futile attempts at waking him up, she bat his shoulder with her right hand. “Chuuya get up, now.” She commanded, causing him to stir.

“What the hell? What time is is?” He groaned and turned onto his back before pushing himself up onto his elbows.

“It’s 10 a.m. You need to get up and start getting ready.” She stated before standing up and walking to the curtains, yanking them open and letting in the natural sunlight of the morning. Chuuya groaned loudly while flopping back down onto his bed and covering his face with his pillow.

~~ Dazai at the metal table on the balcony, a mug of coffee sitting in front of him, releasing steam into the air. He let out a deep breath while running his finger around the top of the cup. His chin rested on his hand and his view was cast downwards toward the street, watching the people go about their days.

“Dazai, what are you doing?” Kunikida asked as he opened the sliding glass door that connected the apartment and the balcony.

“Mentally preparing myself for today.” He replied queitly.

“You don’t seem excited.” Kunikida pulled out the chair that was across from Dazai and sat down. Dazai shifted his gaze over to his blond best friend.

“Kunikida words couldn’t express how happy I am, but I just want everything to go perfectly.”

“It’ll be fine, calm down.” Kunikida stood from the chair. “Get in here, you’ve gotta clean yourself up. I can’t let you get married looking like that.”

~~

“Ow ow! Be gentle nee-san, I wanna have soome hair for my wedding.” Chuuya spoke as Kouyou struggled to get the hairbrush through the thick hair.

“I’m sorry your hair is just being very uncooperative.”

“Now you know why I wear a hat all the time.” They bother laughed before Kouyou gave one last tug on his hair. “Ah fuck!”

“Alright that was the last knot.” She said as she slowly ran the brush through the soft curly hair. Chuuya sighed and slumped into the chair slightly, his eyes cast downward. “Nervous?”

“Very. I don’t really know why. I’m so excited but I can’t shake my anxiety.”

“Oh sweetheart it’s completely normal to be anxious on a big day. Just know that you’re going to have the time of your life.” She comforted and rubbed his arm a bit. Chuuya smiled as he gazed at his own refelction in front of him.

“I just can’t believe this is finally happening.” He smiled.

~~

Dazai attempted to straighten up his curly, voluminous hair in the mirror. He sighed and set his hands down on the counter that sat in between him and the mirror, giving a heavy sigh.

“Dazai seriously you’re not even dressed yet?” Kunikida complained as he entered the room. “Ugh your hair is still a mess. Did you even wash it when you showered?” He continued.

“Yes I washed it and it won’t flatten.” Dazai chuckled a bit. “I look like I just came in from a windstorm and decided to get married without even glancing at my reflection.”

“Get over here.” Kunikida demaned as he dragged over a chair and placed it in front of him. “Sit down.” Dazai quietly oblidged and turned so his back faced the blond. He watched the other begin to skillfully work with Dazai’s hair, brushing out and knots and tangles. Within the span of 10 minutes, Dazai’s hair was brushed through and styled. “There. Much more acceptable.”

“Wow,” Dazai marvelled at his pristine hair. “When did you learn to do hair?”

“Dazai have you seen the length of my hair. I kinda had to.” He shrugged before going towards the closet and retrieving the pieces of Dazai’s tuxedo. “Now get dressed, the ceremony starts in two hours.”

“Alright alright but you’re gonna have to get out if you want me to get dressed.” Dazai teased, causing the blond to cringe slightly before exiting the room, leaving behind a smiling Dazai.

~~~

“You know, Dazai actually tried to convince me to wear a gown. Can you believe it? A wedding gown. I’m a male, I’m gonna wear a tux.” Chuuya laughed as he ranted to his mother figure as he buttoned his shirt. “He’s lucky I even agreed to wear a white tux, I wanted to wear an all black one.” He shrugged as he buttoned his jacket. “How does this look?” He turned to Kouyou and opened his arms. She sat in silence, a smile spreading on her face and tears welling up in her eyes.

“You look amazing, dear.” Her voice broke a bit. “I never thought this day would come.” a single tear escaped her eye before she caught it with the sleeve of her formal kimono. Chuuya smiled and let out a small, cheerful laugh.

“How long until the ceremony?” He turned and looked at the clock at the wall.

“Just 45 minutes left.” Kouyou answered as Chuuya took in a breath. “Deep breath, Chuuya. Everything will be perfect.” Chuuya smiled.

“I know. I’m just really excited.”

~~

“Thanks for coming you guys!” Dazai greeted as he walked over to his friends from the agency. “Wow Ranpo I’m surprised you came.” Dazai added, causing an burst of laughter from the others.

“I’m pretty sure he only came for a slice of cake.” Yosano joked, causing more uncontrolable laughter.

“Where do we put wedding gifts, Dazai?” Atsushi smiled to the brunet and held out a neatly wrapped box.

“Right on that table over there.” Dazai smiled and pointed to the table on the right side of the door. Atsushi handed the gift to Kyouka who graciously walked over and set the box down gently.

“So you nervous?” Yosano asked as she walked over and lightly elbowed Dazai’s side. He laughed a bit and smiled at her.

“A little bit. But that doesn’t matter because no matter what happens, I’m getting married and that’s all that matters.”

“Aww.” Everyone cooed at his words.

“Heartwarming, Dazai.” Hirotsu interjected and placed a hand on the other’s shoulder.

“Oh Hirotsu I’m glad you could come.”

“Of course, I wouldn’t miss you and Nakahara’s big day.” He smiled.

“Ready to start, Dazai?” Kouyou asked as she walked up to him, hands in her sleeves. Dazai smiled.

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

Dazai walked up to his spot at the alter, followed by Kunikida, then Atsushi. Music from the piano sounded as one by one people filed down the aisle and stood on the side Chuuya would soon be on. Dazai smiled and folded his hands in front of him, fingers fidgeting in anticipation.

Soon everyone rose to their feet as Elise began to skip down the aisle, tossing red roses behind her, painting Chuuya’s path with the gentle petals. Once she reached the aisle, she tossed the last of the petals and skipped off to the right to return to Mori’s side.

Heads turned as Chuuya became visible in the doorway. Dazai bit his lip as he laid his eyes on him. The white tuxedo jacket hugged his small waist and rested on his hips. Escorted by Kouyou, theybegan to slowly make their way down the aisle, smiling at all of the smiles. Chuuya smiled at all of the faces he’s come to know over the years, until his eyes finally landed on Dazai. Dazai couldn’t help the smile that grew and the tears that threatened to spill. He inhaled a shaky breath as Chuuya climbed up the stairs to the alter. Kouyou released his arm as Dazai stretched out his hand. Chuuya planted a soft kiss on Kouyou’s temple before placing his hand in Dazai’s. He stood in front of Dazai, staring into the soft burgundy eyes that he lost himself in every time.

~~

“I understand that you have written vows for each other?” Chuuya and Dazai smiled at each other. “Dazai, your vows.” Dazai took a deep breath before beginning to speak.

“Chuuya, I could stand here and tell you all these conventional things like ‘I’ve always been by your side and that will never change’ or things like that but then I’d be lying. I screwed up. And every day I did’t see you, I thought about you. And when I finally saw you two years after I left, I couldn’t believe it. I had to talk to you again. I’m so glad I did. And I’m even more glad that you forgave me. You gave me another chance. So to make up for when I wasn’t there, I vow to never leave you so long as you live. I’ll always be by your side, Chuuya. Because I love you so much. And I never wanna live without you again.” Chuuya’s eyes watered as he bit his lip and smiled up to Dazai.

“Beautiful. Chuuya, your vows.” Chuuya exhaled.

“Dazai, I’m just gonna come out and say it. I’ve loved you for years. Every mission we went on, every might we spent in mafia protected hotel rooms, watching tv in bed, or bickering at each other. I never wanted to leave your side. You never left my mind, even in the times when you weren’t physically there. I could always feel you there, and hear your voice even if you were miles away. I vow to never leave you, always be there to save you from your suicide attempts, make you smile, and every time you feel alone, I’ll be there to grab your hand and hold you. I love you, Dazai.” Dazai bit his bottom lip and smiled down to the redhead.

“Lovely. May I have the rings?” Atsushi handed over the two small silver bands. One plain silver band, the other small silver circles with gems in the middle of each. “Let these rings serve as a physical embodiment of your love for each other, their circular shape signifying the infinite time you will spend loving each other.” Dazai grabbed the jeweled silver ring and slid it onto Chuuya’s hand before Chuuya did the same for Dazai. “Do you, Dazai Osamu, take Chuuya Nakahara, to be your husband, ‘till death do you part?” Dazai turned his head and smiled, gazing into the small oceans.

“Yes, I do.”

“And do you, Chuuya Nakahara, take Dazai Osamu, to be your husband, ‘till death do you part.” Chuuya smiled.

“I do.”

“Then by the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and husband. You may kiss the husband.” They smiled at each other before Dazai grabbed Chuuya’s hips and pulled him in for a kiss. Chuuya wrapped his arms around Dazai’s neck as everyone around them cheered. They separated after a few seconds and stared at each other before letting each other go and facing the audience. The two smiled and waved as they laced their hands together and walked down the aisle together.

~~~~~~~~~

I’ve only been to two weddings okay forgive me for not knowing some of that speech I just needed this written

This probably isn’t my best work but eh whatever 

As aslways, leave your feedback and my ask box, messages and submissions are open for your ideas!

[knockyasocksoff2022]

I just finished reading this series of three Soukoku fics on ao3, they are AMAZING! Everyone should read these.

[knockyasocksoff2022]

Soukoku

I like to think that even when they're dating and after they're married Chuuya still calls Dazai by his last name Dazai. Why? because he's Dazai, he's always been Dazai, to everyone. It's just who he is. Dazai is Chuuya's partner, friend, and soulmate.

I think that even when he's angry Chuuya always calls him Dazai eventhough calling him Osamu would get his attention way faster, Chuuya wants to save Dazai's given name for special occasions, sweet moments, just for the two of them. He doesn't want Dazai's given name to have a negative conotation in Dazai's mind.

I also think that when Chuuya is really worried he'll call Dazai by his first name and that this reassures Dazai about Chuuya's feelings for him.

And sometimes when they're at home enjoying a lazy morning or on an evening after a long day Chuuya will just whisper ever so gently into Dazai's ear, "Osamu, I love you." and Dazai will be suprised (because he always is when Chuuya uses his given name) and startle a bit, maybe even blush slightly. And he'll whisper back "Osamu loves you too, Chuuya, my precious chibi."

Because to Dazai Chuuya's name is also special, he loves the sound of it and the feel of it on his lips. But nicknames are how he tells Chuuya he loves him.

[knockyasocksoff2022]

Chibis make the best lunches

under cut due to length

Yosano’s Perspective:

It’s lunch break and everyone is eating . . . except for Dazai. He rarely eats so that’s not what bothers me. It’s that he’s actually doing work for once.

“Hey Dazai, where’s your lunch?”

He looks up, startled, “I seem to have forgotten it.”

“Well Ranpo and I are going out, you want anything?” I offer

“No, that's alright. I have to finish these anyway.” He says it politely and I don’t think about it too much. This is probably just a plan to starve himself to death.

That moron, no respect for his body or care for his health! It almost doesn’t matter that he’s suicidal, he’s bound to die young anyway. We all care about him but there’s only so much we can do for someone so far gone. He’s so smart, we all recognise that. I just wish he’d use his brain sometimes.

Dazai Perspective:

I sigh, my stomach growls in disappointment at me for leaving my food at home. Guilt also factors in, because my dear husband took the time to pack my lunch. He won’t be happy about me leaving it or that I didn’t eat. Oh well, I’ll just have it tomorrow. Sad about not getting to eat the yummy things Chuuya made, I decide to actually do some paperwork for once.

Kunikida’s Perspective:

I start to open the agency office door but it opens before I even touch it. I’m met with a hat on a head of ginger hair and below that blue eyes. Wait!?

My gun is pulled before I even think about it, I don’t need to.  “Nakahara-san!? What are you doing here!”

The red head just snickers but doesn’t say anything. I get ready to fire, not a lethal shot but still painful. Suddenly I’m flat on my back, gun nowhere to be seen. A bandaged hand offers me my glasses and I place them back on my face, the world becoming clear again.

Dazai smiles down at me, “Sorry Kunikida, you were about to shoot my Chibi. I can’t let you do that now can I.” He looks to the mafia executive, who gives a sickly sweet smile then rolls his eyes.

Wait . . . ‘His’ Chibi? What does that mean?

“Anyways . . . I brought your lunch, and it’s supposed to storm tonight so I brought you the big umbrella.” He hands Dazai the bento box and the umbrella

“Aww, my Chibi is such a wonderful husband”

“Alright you sap, just take your lunch, I have work to do.”

“Thank you Chibi.”

As the mafia executive closes the door the words finally sink in. I turn to Dazai but he’s already at his desk eating peacefully, the umbrella propped against the desk.

“WHAAATTT?!!!” I can’t help the scream. I know I’m voicing everyone’s thoughts. Dazai doesn’t even look up, it’s as if he doesn’t know I’m talking to him. I walk over to his desk. He finally looks up.

“Oh, Kunikida, do you need something? I’m afraid I won’t be able to help you seeing as I am on lunch break.” He goes back to his lunch.

Dazai’s Perspective:

Kunikida stands quietly for a moment taking a deep breath, then, “YOU’RE MARRIED TO NAKAHARA CHUUYA, THE MAFIA EXECUTIVE?!?!?!”

“That’s Dazai Chuuya and yes. Now may I get back to my lunch.” I say keeping my voice casual, teasing him.

“FOR HOW LONG?”

I chew my food slowly keeping him in suspense. “Oh, not that long, only five years.”

“YOU’VE BEEN CONSORTING WITH UPPER LEVEL MAFIA FOR HALF A DECADE, WITH KILLERS. HOW DO WE KNOW YOU HAVEN’T TOLD HIM EVERYTHING?”

I laugh ignoring the insulting implications, “Oh well haven't you heard the key to a good marriage is to leave work at work,” I smirk feeling a little smug, “Or is that not in you little book.” Kunikida’s face goes red.

“Now please let me enjoy my lunch.” With that he walks back to his desk, “Oh and please don’t try to shoot my husband again.” I hand him the stack of filled papers he almost lets them fall to the floor before slowly taking them. I ignore the stares and let myself eat, still feeling the happiness of Chuuya’s, however brief, visit.

[knockyasocksoff2022]

“Mr Dazai, your son threw up at school.”

(Relationship Reveal and soft but chaotic parent Dazai because I can. Don’t worry there’s no graphic descriptions of throwing up. Gets super fluffy at the end. This was kind of rushed so may not be the best, also you can probably tell I suck at titles.)

Kind of long so it’s under the cut (2,360 words)

Kunikida P.O.V.

I'm always the first at work so when I arrive on our floor I start to put the key into the lock but when I do the door opens. I immediately tense and open it cautiously, in case this is another break in. But no thieves are in sight, just Dazai sitting at his desk, deep in conversation with the president.

My briefcase falls to the floor with a muffled clatter.

"Good Morning, Mr. President, Dazai-san" I pick up my case and head over to my desk, a bit embarrassed, but neither of them looks up.

Soon all the members are present and the work day begins.

—

Just as I finish my first report, a phone rings from the other side of the room, and Dazai's suicide song starts blasting. I sigh looking over to the man's desk only to find him trying to hang himself on the coat stand.

"Oh, Kunikida-kun" he sing songs, "Could you hand me my phone please."

"Oh fine." I huff, shoving the device at him, "But you better not be long, we do have work to do."

"I won't." He sing songs, he definitely will. UGH! Lazy waste of bandages.

The call starts and I find myself curious as to who would be calling Dazai this early in the morning.

He holds the phone to his ear while listening and a look of amusement crosses his face. After a second he answers sounding confused, "Yes, this is he. Why? Has Saku-chan done something problematic?"

Saku-chan? Dazai has a girlfriend?! I shoot him a look asking who the hell Saku-chan is and why is he speaking so formally, but he ignores me.

"Ahh, I see, what is the matter then?" He nods, a look of worry that I've never seen before crosses Dazai's face.

Dazai’s P.O.V

It’s awkward with the noose around my neck, but I finally manage to get the phone to my ear. A woman speaks into it. “Hello? This is Nurse Kajimura, Yokohama Primary School. Am I speaking to Dazai Osamu?”

I don’t understand, I just dropped Saku off an hour ago. (the school is on my way to work which was why I was early, also it was fun to see the looks on my coworkers faces.) What trouble could he have gotten in already.

“Yes, this is he. Why? Has Saku-chan done something problematic?” I answer.

(A/N: Soukoku named their kid after Oda 🥺🥹)

“Don’t worry, Sakunosuke is not in trouble, we called you because your husband was not answering his phone.” Oh that makes sense because Chuuya is on a mission in another city, probably super busy. Ohhhh! How dreadfully I miss my Chibi! “Ahh, I see, what is the matter then?”

“We need you to come and pick your son up as soon as possible, preferably immediately. He vomited in class this morning and has a cough, he is also running a low-grade temperature. He says his head and throat hurt. We think it may be the flu and suggest that you keep him home for the remainder of this week and through next week.”

Oh, my poor baby! I say in my head but decide not to be dramatic on the phone. “Oh, of course. I’ll be there in 10 minutes.”

Kunikida’s P.O.V

As soon as the call clicks off Dazai unties the noose faster than I've ever seen anyone untie a noose and is grabbing his car keys. His movements aren't frantic though, they never are.

"Hey, lazy Dazai! Where do you think you're going!? The workday isn't even half over yet!" I stand in front of the door.

He smiles calmly, then his face shifts into a wide grin as if he's about to say something he knows will shock me. I brace myself for whatever outlandish excuse he's prepared, knowing full well I could never actually stop him from leaving.

"I'm afraid I have to leave early, Kunikida-kun, my son threw up at school, and he has a fever. The nurse said I must come and get him as soon as possible."

Despite my mental preparations, his words catch me off guard. He takes advantage of my silence and continues, "Normally I wouldn't just up and leave like this," he's fully smirking now, "but my dear beloved husband is out of town for work so we're all alone."

"Y-your what . . . you're what!?" I struggle for words. What the hell made him come up with this?

"My husband, he's out of town for the next few days. That is why I have to pick up Saku-chan." He says simply, and I can tell he's enjoying this.

I shake my head to clear it and exhale. "Dazai, I don't know what's going on but you can't just ditch work when you've hardly even been here for more than a hour, honestly I've had enough!"

His expression turns from joking to icy cold in an instant, "May I remind you Kunikida, that I was here before you. And I will leave, so if you don't mind, I am going to pick up my son from school and I will not be coming back. If you want me to turn in a leave application I will, tomorrow. See you then."

His expression is serious, in a way that I've never seen it before, in fact I've never actually seen him look serious before. All his expressions that I thought were serious, pale in comparison to this death stare. I know that he is an excellent liar but . . . this expression. He must be telling the truth. The embarrassment is extreme. Of course it was only logical of me to assume that he was joking as an excuse for slacking off, given his reputation but still.

"Dazai . . . I apologise-" He's already out the door and I turn in defeat, only to see everyone else standing up at their desks, clearly acting as spectators to our confrontation. To my comfort they look as shocked as I feel. Well, not Ranpo (of course not) and the President. Did the president know about this? I feel slightly betrayed.

Junichirou recovers first, "Dazai-san has a child?"

"Possibly more than one" Ranpo offers though, obviously he knows exactly how many children Dazai has, and is choosing not to tell us.

"Well I think that that's wonderful." Kenji says smiling, "I would love to meet his children."

"Do you think that kid is alright, I mean, guys you can't forget that this is Dazai-san we're talking about." Atsushi gestures vaguely around the room looking worried.

"Who's the mum, do you think? Someone he knows or from an adoption centre maybe?" Kenji wonders

"Now that I think about it, it all makes sense. Maybe he's always late because he has to drop off his kids but the school is really far away and leaves early for the same reason." Junichirou thinks out loud.

"That's a good point, but then why was he early today?" Atsushi asks.

"Oh yeah, maybe the kid switched schools for some reason."

"Yeah maybe."

"Why is nobody talking about the fact that he's married, and to a man much less?" I ask everyone, earning five funny looks and a small smile from the president. "I mean, it doesn't matter but is no one surprised" nobody says anything, "at all? I mean you've all seen the way he flirts, and it's only ever with women." I look at their expressions and the sentence dies in my mouth.

Junichirou thinks for a second, "Well, it is surprising that he's married–"

"But to a man? To me at least he seemed like a total ladies man. It's just surprising is all, is it not?" I question again.

Immediately there's a "No." from Yosano

"Nope." adds Atsushi

"Nuh-uh." Kenji just keeps smiling

"Nah." Ranpo mumbles still eating snacks, enjoying the free drama.

The Tanazakis shake their heads.

"Really?" I can't believe this, "Did everyone but me know?"

"Yes." Yosano deadpans

"I mean, wasn't it obvious?" Ranpo shrugs popping another biscuit in his mouth

"It was, but Kunikida's just really straight." Yosano and Ranpo exchange a look of humour.

The entire office cracks up, even the president lets out a small chuckle

"And Dazai-san is still a massive flirt, married or not. His husband must hate it, I know I would absolutely lose it if Junichi even so much as looked at another girl." Naomi says (it sounds more like a purr) as she slides her hand up Junichirou's shirt. I look away quickly.

"Alright, everyone, I get it. Dazai is gay, and has an unknown number of children, let's all get back to work."

"He's bi actually." Ranpo laughs, I sigh and walk back to my desk leaving the cackling detective alone to be smug. "and his husband is a wonderful person."

Wait, what? Everyone whips around to face Ranpo (except for the president who's in his office) "You know him?"

"Not well, but we've met."

"Is he someone we all know?" Yosano asks

"You may have seen him but none of you really know him."

"Well that's helpful." the doctor rolls her eyes.

"Of course, happy to help."

"At least tell us how he looks." Atsushio pleads the genius detective

"Well, let's just say he stands out, you'd definitely notice him if you did see him."

Several groans and sighs echo around the room and we decide to give up . . . for now. Ranpo just smirks and goes back to snacking. (It's a wonder how his desk is so clean and that there's never a crumb on his paperwork)

Dazai’s P.O.V

I walk out the office door, thankful I built in extra time to my journey just in case something like that happend.

I hear Atsushi's voice as I head downstairs "Do you think that kid is alright, I mean, guys you can't forget that this is Dazai-san we're talking about." and something inside me wilts.

Why would they think I would make a good parent? I've never given them that impression but it still hurts me (extra because I know it's my own fault that they think that). I push the dark thoughts down and drive to Yokohama Primary School.

When I go to the front desk to fill the early check out form the desk clerk eyes my bandages and gives me a strange look, thankfully she says nothing.

"The nurse will bring your son from her office in a moment." She says, motioning for me to sit down on one of the padded folding chairs.

Nurse Kajimura brings Saku out and he immediately collapses into my arms. The nurse smiles a little and waves us goodbye. Saku is too tired to wave back so I pick him up and carry him back to the car.

On the way home I stop at the pharmacy and I call Chuuya to let him know that Saku is okay. He picks up on the first ring. I look back but Saku's passed out cold.

"Hay babe, I was just about to call you. I saw that the school called me earlier, is everything okay?"

"Mostly, Saku's sick, I had to pick him up because he vom–"

"Eww, no. I don't need to know every single detail."

"Aww, Chibi's so squeamish."

"Hey, I could kick your ass!"

"I know."

"Why'd you bring him to school sick anyway, dumbass?"

"Le gasssp! You're so mean, how was I supposed to know?"

"The fact that I even need to explain says a lot."

"He was fine when I dropped him off."

"Well, I'm just glad I'm not home, to catch whatever youth plague he has." I can practically see Chuuya wrinkling his nose in disgust on the other end of the line.

"Wow, do you not love us, to leave me all alone with a sick child."

"Okay I'm going to hang up now. Bye shitty mackerel."

Just as I'm at the checkout counter I see a new text: You have to get the children's medication. The one in the blue and green package.

I laugh and send: "I know, but it's so sweet that Chibi is worried."

He leaves me on read.

—----

It was easy enough to get Saku into bed but he just can't seem to fall asleep.

"Do you want some juice?"

He shakes his head, "Father, can you tell me a story?" he asks quietly

"Sure, what type of story."

"Hmmmm," he drags the word out, thinking for a moment, "How did you meet Papa?"

"Oh." I was not expecting that.

"Well, we used to work together."

"Where?"

"At a company."

"What type of company?"

"They, um, they work at the city's ports."

"Cool, what were you and Papa's jobs?"

Noo, please, Saku, I beg mentally, please go to sleep. "We were kind of like the managers."

"What's a manager?"

This is an easy enough question. "It's someone who goes out and makes sure everything's working alright and that everyone is doing what they're supposed to be, because the company won't work unless everyone works together." There a lesson in teamwork, now please go to sleep!

"What happens if someone isn't doing what they're supposed to be?"

Ummmm, they get tortured and possibly die, depending on the severity of the crime. "Oh, they get fired."

"What does fired mean."

Another easy question, "It means that they can't work for the company anymore."

"Oh, where do they work after they gte fired?"

Hevean. Hell? "I don't know, it's different for everybody."

He nods, "Did you get fired?"

"No, I left."

"Why?"

"It was a toxic work environment."

"What's . . ." he struggles to pronounce 'toxic work environment'.

"My boss wasn't very nice. He fired a friend of mine."

"That is mean, but what about Papa?"

"While we were working together I had fallen in love with Papa so we decided to stay together even after we had different jobs. A bit after that we got married and then we adopted you, and we're very happy. Now you need rest so you can feel better, go to sleep." I kiss him good night and leave the room before he can ask anymore questions, barely making it out of the room before bursting into laughter. Chuuya is definitely going to be pissed that he missed this.

(A/N: I also think that dazai having his kid call him Father is just the type of weird shit he would do. (Also because only Chuuya gets to call him Daddy, anyways))

[knockyasocksoff2022]

The Disastrous Meeting

(A/N: sorry. I know this is bad I kinda have writter's block right now, but I really wanted to write someting. It's longer than I originally planned (I feel like most of my stories are longer than I plan for them to be lol) and I'll probbaly edit this later. Also I didn't mean to make Kunikida such a bad guy in this one but oh well.)

under the cut due to length (3635 words)

I haven’t slept the entire night but I stay laying awake in bed even after my alarm rings. I’m so so so tired yet I can’t fall asleep, not without my Chuuya. The bed is too cold without his warm embrace.

Finally when I grow too restless I walk to the kitchen, but Chuuya isn’t here making breakfast so I decide to forego eating. My stomach is too sensitive to anything besides Chuuya’s cooking and crab, and I’m out of crab so . . .

But knowing he would want me to eat, I look in the fridge and see that there’s some month old vegetables. Chuuya must have left them. They look okay but not worth the effort.

I shut the fridge and feel myself shivering. 

When I put on my work clothing I throw one of Chuuya’s jumpers on before putting on my signature tan trench coat. It isn’t very warm, but it’s something, and it smells like him.

—

When I arrive at the office everyone stares at me.

“What are you wearing?” Kunikida’s voice is devoid of emotion but he’s clearly in shock. Oh god, I think I’ve broken him, but why?

I look down, to my surprise the jumper I wear is at least 12 or so centimetres too short for me, like some sort of crop top, despite being loose. I can’t believe I didn’t think about how Chuuya’s height difference might make it hard for me to wear his clothes, probably because he’s usually here to wear mine. I’m not exactly embarrassed, (I know I look good in cropped things) just startled, and through the waves of emotions that crash over me (love, longing) I struggle to hide it.

“What, oh this? The girl I was with last night left it, I was planning on returning it, of course, I’m no thief Kunikida-kun, but not before I’d properly washed it, so I figured, why not wear it first, eh?”

Kunikida just raises an eyebrow, “And that thing on your neck, did she leave that too, or did you just forget to take it off, because I will not tolerate such unprofessional things in this office.” His voice is stern.

“Whatever do you mean, Kunikida-kun?” I make it sound teasing but I genuinely have no idea what he’s talking about.

“Do not make me spell it out for you Dazai. You know very well what I am referring to.”

I really don’t, but I have a reputation so I say nothing and continue onto my desk. Just as I sit down something chokes me. I gag pathetically. 

“Dazai-san, this is more than inappropriate for work, think of Kenji and Kyoka. What if we have a case that deals with children? Do you care nothing for the reputation of this agency?”

“Kunikida-kun I really didn’t take you for the type interested in choking people.” I wheeze, feeling around my collar to loosen the blond’s grip but I find no hands there, they’re higher up, grabbing onto . . . a choker.

Oh.

It’s one of Chuuya’s, a casual one, not the subtle black one he wears for work (he took that one with him), no this one is joined together by metal rings in the front and back. Kunikida must have thought it was some kind of toy. That man really has no idea about some things, does he?

“Are you going to take it off, or do I have to.”

“You know how weird that sounds out of context.” I continue to tease him, fighting internal panic at the potential discovery of our relationship, while easily wriggling myself free.

I take the choker off, shrugging as if it was a prank all along and throwing it into my work bag. I certainly won’t let Kunikida touch something belonging to my Chuuya.

I can cover this up easily. I laugh, exaggerating the action, pushing my cartoonish persona. “Ah, you’re still so gullible Kunikida-kun! This isn’t what you think it is, you can buy one of these at any pet shop, did you know that.” 

“No, actually, I did not.” he looks intrigued, and pulls out his trusty notebook, probably thinking that women like animals and trying to learn what animals like to impress his mystery woman. Yes, he should be marrying her in less than a year or so.

“Yes, they’re called double lead bearing collars and are considered the most effective by trainers in controlling dogs with aggressive behaviour. I was wearing it wrong, both rings are supposed to go around the side of the dog's neck, not the front and back. Then you attach the special double leash and the dog won’t be able to pull you as you walk it.”

“Hmm, most intriguing. He lifts his pen and shuts the book.

I nod, giving just the right amount of pause. “Yes, I agree, it would indeed be intriguing, if such a thing existed, that is. As of now, it does not, what a shame, don’t you think Kunikida-kun?”

I don’t look up but I can hear the sound of a pen shattering and the spring flying off somewhere to be found by one of the unlucky agency clerks.

—

When the day ends everyone disperses to do the things that normal individuals do after office hours. I have nothing else to do and I feel empty but filled with lead at the same time, the lead being my longing for Chuuya.

As I walk home a chilly spring breeze starts up and I shiver, my body becoming even more numb with the cold temperature, but it’s as if I’m freezing from the inside out.

I pass Chuuya’s favourite wine shop and it crosses my mind to get him a gift but then I remember there’s still another two full weeks until he comes home.

When I arrive home I fall into bed and stare up at the ceiling.

—

When the sun rises I return, from my listless staring, to reality.

Upon this re-entering into reality I notice several things. 

It’s cold, (I know it can’t be because of the air con because none has been turned on since Chuuya left), so more accurately, I’m cold, really cold.

My head, back and throat ache.

When I try to stand up, a wave of dizziness assaults me, I fall back down.

I don’t need Ultra Deduction to know that I’ve fallen ill, or at the very least coming down with something. 

I swallow, it hurts, tears prickle in my eyes. Not because of the aches and pains so much as the fact that my loving husband isn’t here to care for me. Normally I would tell him I’m not feeling well and he would take my temperature and make me tea and maybe draw me a warm bath and wash my hair. And since I fall ill so rarely he would take the day off to work from home and we would spend the day together.

I lay back down and assess the situation. We have no medicine, well we do but it’s locked in a safe that only Chuuya knows the entry code to, and knowing Chuuya he didn’t just make it my birthday or something dumb like that. He told me he used a random number generator. And he neve lets me watch him opening it. And he says he doesn’t worry about me. Ha!

I could of course buy some more medicine but I don’t even feel like moving.

Now, I’m alone with no medicine and nothing to do and I can’t even stand the thought of being here in this lonely empty place all day. My head spins and aches and I feel like I’m being weighed down by dumbbells.

So, I decide to do something drastic, I decide to go to work.

Maybe I can convince Atsushi or Kenji to buy me some soup. Maybe Yosano will give me something, just to make the pain stop.

Reluctant to leave but reluctant to stay, I bundle up and head out.

—

“Oh, Dazai, it’s you, it’s about time you showed u- ugh!” Kunikida looks me up and down, giving a disgusted grimace. I’m a bit shocked, it's rare to see him this hostile, I mean sure he won’t hesitate to knock my lights out, but this is a different kind of hostility. At least I think so, I can’t really think at all with the fog filling up my head.

“Finally ran out of clothes from jumping in that damned river, did you? Ever heard of a washing machine, a dryer perhaps? Wonderful inventions, truly. You ought to use at least one before you think about coming to work dressed like some crackpot wandering the Tescos car park at some ungodly hour of the night”

(A/N: I just realised after proof-reading this that Kunikida sounds so BrItIsH here, sorry!)

I look at my outfit in the reflection of Kunikida’s desktop, paying more attention now than when I put it on. It consists of an old Holiday jumper, striped pyjama bottoms, a blue woolly hat and Chuuya’s UGS. (Which are a little big on me because I have smaller feet than him, despite my greater height.)

“Ah, forgive the outfit, I haven’t been feeling very myself this morning, I think I have a cold.” 

Atsyshi looks legitimately worried at my sincere tone but I see the scepticism behind it.

Kunikida scoffs, “And you came into work? If you were really sick, you would’ve just skipped like usual. You don’t need to put this much effort into faking illness, we aren’t going to believe you anyway, especially because it’s a dead giveaway that you aren’t sick since you put so much effort into this ruse. If you don’t intend on doing any work you should just leave, we don’t have time for this, but since you're here, please get to work.”

His reaction confuses me, I may have lied about other things, but I’ve never lied about being ill. The blond’s face tells me not to argue, but I really just need some medication, surely Yosano won’t mind that.

“I assure you, I am not faking, all I ask is some headache medication from Yosano.”

(A/N: Poor Dazai never sounds sincere even when he is) 

The doctor frowns. “Why? So you can try and off yourself again? Uh, no! Just go jump off the roof if you’re that desperate.��

“Exactly, we are not going to hand you means to commit suicide in this office, now please do your work.”

I want to ask him why I would commit suicide when my beloved Chuuya hasn’t come back yet. I don’t want him to find my body when he returns, that would be terrible. But my throat is too dry to form the question and Kunikida looks like he’s going to explode.

I don’t have the energy to argue so I just go to my desk. I can’t take the boredom so, through the haze in my brain, I try to figure out what to do. Suddenly I don’t really remember how I got here but I feel cold, really cold. Kunikida said something about what I usually do, but I can’t remember what it was. Well, what do people usually do at work? Ah, of course, they work!

I open the laptop on my desk, watching a little mystified as my fingers key in the passcode from muscle memory. Quickly, I begin the paperwork, filling in details of cases as they pop into my foggy brain, my fingers blur as I type, for some reason it feels like I have to get this done as fast as possible but I don't really know why. My thoughts blur together in my head, melting into goo and running into each other.

After an hour or so I feel my eyes closing. Well, no, that’s not right. I can feel that they’re wide open, but my field of view is closing, black eats away like I’m looking at a photo that’s being burnt from the edges and the fire is eating its way towards the centre.

I blink but it doesn’t stop, fear creeps in, colouring the gooey thoughts dark and violent shades. 

I let my head slump against the wooden desk, or maybe it just falls of its own accord, I can’t tell.

There’s loud thumping and a shadow falls over me.

“Dazai, this is your desk not a bed, you can’t just fall asleep. And stop making such a racket, you needn’t hit your keys quite so loudly.” Kunikida scolds.

“I don’t feel good.” is all I manage to say.

“You’re clearly feeling well enough to annoy us with your intense typing.”

“But, Kunikida-kun, I'm not faking. I just need some headache medication.” My voice cracks.

If he notices the crack he doesn't show it. “You don’t look ill, you could’ve at least tried to cover up your lies, now stop being such a pest.”

“My head hurts, I feel sick.”

“Oh, come off it, you brat! We really don’t have time for this, we have something important to do.”

“You can take my temperature!” My voice comes out, pathetic pleading sound.

“I will do no such thing, now get changed, we have a meeting to attend. And it’s with the Port Mafia, so get your act together. We cannot afford to appear weak.”

“I-”

“Go!” Kunikida’s yell cuts me with its hard edges and leaves my ears ringing, as he tosses a stack of clothes at me. 

—

In the restroom I start to change into the things Kunikida gave me. It appears to be some type of suit.

As soon as I remove my jumper, a chill crawls over my skin. I put on the other set of clothes as quickly as I can with my vision spinning and dipping in and out like this. I start to style my hair in preparation for seeing Chuuya, (A/N: think of the Dead Apple hairstyle, cuz I couldn’t find the name) but then I remember that he won’t be there, and the emptiness hits me all over again.

I feel myself slipping down to the floor (ceiling?) as the room twists and bends, and just barely catch myself on the counter. Finally a splash of ice water on my face restores my vision, leaving nausea and an even worse headache in its place.

I stumble clumsily out of the restroom but no one notices.

“Ah finally! Hurry up, you lazy bum, we have to be there in 30 minutes and pick up Ranpo from a mission on the way, you know traffic is a nightmare this time of day. Oh, wait, you can’t even drive. Useless, honestly.”

Positively desperate, I try one last time, “Do I have to go, I think I’m gonna be sick.”

“Dazai, quiet yourself and get in the car right now.”

My entire body deflates like a balloon at the dismissal but I manage to drag myself along.

—

I open my eyes slowly as someone shakes me awake.

“We’re here Dazai-san.” It’s Kenji, his sweet smile has none of Kunikida’s malice.

“Thank you Kenji.” my voice is a croak. After a second of hesitation, I ask, “Do I look alright?” 

“You look very handsome in that suit Dazai-san. Very respectable.”

“Ah, thanks.”

“No problem.” He skips a head, still cheery despite the imposing nature of the Port Mafia campus.

I lean heavily on the car and sigh as I look up at the big buildings. 

Chuuya’s Perspective

It turns out I didn’t need nearly so long to finishe the mission. But I arrive home from Hong Kong in the middle of the morning so I don’t bother going home. I stash my luggage in my office and prepare for the meeting.

We’re having a meeting with the A.D.A today and Osamu will be tehre. I can’t wait to see hi. Part of me is also afraid. I did everything I could but I know he doesn’t care for himself when I’m gone. WHat if he’s lost weight or cut himself or . . .

I take a breath and don’t allow myself to dwell, I’ll be seeing him in a hour anyways.

—

We get into the conference room before the A.D.A arrives.

–

The president walks in first, I catch Mori’s soft smile before the coll, aloof demeanour covers it again. Next is the doctor, she winks and gives me a thumbs up, a thanks for the wine I gave her. Then is the child genius, then the tiger, who looks like he’s going to pee himself, then Kenji. I actually like Kenji, he says “Hey Executive Cool-hat-san!” I have to smile. Next is Kyouka, Kouyou looks longingly at her, like a mother missing her daughter. Where is Osamu???

Last Glasses man comes in and behind him Osamu strolls casually in, and takes his seat. To the untrained eyes his expression is similar to Mori’s, cool, aloof. To me he looks beautiful as usual, but sick. And he hasn’t noticed me yet. Probably because he’s so focused on his facade.This is him actually trying to appear bored and uninterested.

I clear my throat. 

He sees me. 

He slips. 

Just a little, barely a centimetre.

But I know, I can see.

His eyes widen in surprise and they’re alight, a sliver of sparkle in the corner, a glassy reflection indicating fever. I watch his shoulders sag, almost invisible, in relife. His skin is a few shades paler, and he plays off a shiver as an adjustment of his shoulders. 

Damn it! 

I knew this would happen. Whenever I’m gone he hardly eats or sleeps (as if he eats or sleeps much when I am here).

He looks awful, how has no one noticed? I have to get him out of here, but how, it’s such a small room with so few people I can’t exactly slip him out the backdoor.

He looks at me, his eyes begging me for comfort. 

I look at him telling him, with my eyes, to ask the president if he can leave or something. He shakes his head.

Oh fuck this!

If they’re letting them suffer then, I’m going to make a scene, so help me god.

“Which one of you is responsible for this?” I stand up and point to my husband

People move aside in shock.

“Whatever do you mean, Chuuya-san? You knew that your Partner would be here, did you not.” Mori speaks quietly, calmly, sweetly. He can tell Osamu is ill, just as I can and has decided to make my job easier. He may be an ass but he’s a good boss.

“Don’t you mean ex-partner?” Koyou raises an eyebrow at Mori, not understanding what he’s doing.

“No, I meant exactly what I said.” Mori smiles innocently, his gaze on his own husband.

“Partner?” Glasses man’s voice squeaks and his face pales as he tries to maintain composure. “In what way?” he asks, clearly forcing himself to be calmer now.

I’m still too mad to really answer him. “That doesn’t matter, how long has he been ill?”

“Ill?” Glasses man asks confused

“Yeah, can’t you idiots see!”

“I assure you, Executive Nakahara, he is perfectly fine.”

It annoys me even further not being called by my married name, though I hardly expect him to know it. I walk up to the idealist, grabbing his collar “Fine? FINE?? He—”

A weight settles against me. I look down, and catch Osamu before he slides to the floor. He’s fainted.

I look at the blond, who looks as shocked as if a pink elephant has pranced its way into the room, and rage boils in my blood rising up to the surface, just beneath my skin.

I grab his hand, with much more force than is necessary, and force it against Osamu’s forehead.

“Feel that? He has a fever. It’s so fucking obvious, how can you call yourselves detectives?”

“Oh, so he really wasn’t lying.” I hear the doctor whisper, she sounds incredulous.

“Lying?” I’m confused at first and then I get it, “HE TRIED TO TELL YOU!”

“Please calm down.” Glasses man’s voice is almost erased by fear

“NO, I DON'T THINK I WILL!”

“You must understand why we didn’t believe him.” The blond is afraid for his life, as he should be.

“I. Don’t. Care.” I make my voice quite, precise, deadly as I let go of him. He falls off balance and stumbles to the floor.

“Come on, Osmau, we’re going home.”

His eyes open a little bit, “Mnn, Chuu?” he groans, “m’ gonna be sick.”

Shit! I grab a bin and put it under his chin, and help him down to the floor, just in time. As he empties his stomach I rub his back gently, whispering sweet nothings. I can tell he’s suffering, he hates being in pain.

“It’s alright, it’s okay, Osamu, you’re gonna be okay, baby.”

I know I probably shouldn’t be letting these people know I have a softer side but at this point I couldn’t care less.

When he’s finished I hold him against me protectively and turn back to the detectives.

“Listen to me very closely.” I step closer, “He may be an annoying asshole liar but he wouldn’t lie about this. Next time, believe him, or you’ll be hearing from me.

With that I take my husband and leave the amused port mafia members and shocked detectives behind. 

The mackerel is asleep before I even get to my car. I thank the gods I brought it and not my motorbike.

—

When we get inside Osamu pukes again, this is going to be a long next few days.

EPILOGUE: Author P.O.V.

It’s safe to say that the A.D.A is thoroughly shook. You could hear the yelling from the next town over.

Meanwhile the two leaders of the organisations are smiling bemused at their subordinated shenanigans, both mentally deciding what they should have for dinner since they skipped lunch for this meeting. 

The fight ends when Kunikida passes out from shock after Kuoyou tells him how long soukoku has been together.

[knockyasocksoff2022]

Executive Dazai

(A/N: R.I.P. me trying to write comedy! Also sorry for any typos sometimes I miss things. Anyway let's gooo)

Under cut due to length (4,154 words)

Atsushi's P.O.V

"Gah! Where is that slacker!?" I hear Kunikida-san mumbling from his desk. He holds a stack of reports, and I walk over to offer to help fill some.

He sees me, an angry look in his eyes. I know it isn't for me but it's still intimidating. "Yah, Atsushi-kun!" I can't help jumping at his raised voice.

"Y-yes Kunikida-san?"

"Have you seen Dazai recently?" His phrasing is formal as usual but his tone is full of all the anger and frustration and exasperation that comes from working with the suicidal detective.

"No . . . you don't think something's happened to him, do you?"

He huffs, adjusting his eyeglasses and crosses something out in his notebook. (There goes his schedule.) "No, I'm sure that he is fine, but these reports need to be filled."

"Oh, okay then. I can just do Dazai-san's report for now."

"You are too kind Atsushi, you shouldn't enable him."

"Well, I-I . . . I just want to help out is all."

Kunikida-san shakes his head but lets me take the reports.

—-------- Three Days later —-------

It's been a week since anyone has heard anything from Dazai-san. I trust Kunikida-san, but I'm starting to get worried for my mentor. Kunikida-san is not worried . . . he's FURIOUS!!!

At first he ignored it, saying that that fool can do whatever the hell he wants and it's no matter to him, but the paperwork is piling up and most of the other members who've finished all of their work, paper or otherwise, are on vacation this week.

Yosano is going to some spa resort with one of her friends.

Ranpo is going to Disney World with Poe.

Kenji is visiting his grandparents back in his hometown, for the summer festival. He promised to bring back the biggest watermelon he can find.

The Tanazakis are going camping.

Kunikida doesn't know how to take breaks.

I'm helping him because I have nowhere to go and not enough money even if I did have somewhere to go. -^T-T^-

Dazai-san is nowhere to be seen.

"Have you just tried calling Dazai-san?"

"You think he picks up?" I can tell his question is a rhetorical one.

"He- he hung up on you? But . . .?"

"He has no respect, the useless fool."

"Oh." I don't really know what I should say to that. "You know Kunikida-san, maybe, you could just go to his house or something."

His head perks up, "Ah yes, Atsushi-kun! That is a great idea! Why didn't I think of that?" He adjusts his glasses and I smile at the praise. Kunikida's face falls. "But we don't have his address."

"Really? I thought everyone lived in the dorms?"

"No, not Dazai. For all I know he sleeps on a futon under a big tree in some park."

"Whaaa!"

"Or a shack, maybe a garbage bin, I bet he finds that nice and cosy."

"Dazai-san is homeless!" I say, not believing the words.

Kunikida-san only laughs, "Pffft! That idiot is richer than all of us, of course he has a home. I just don't know where it is. Well . . . it wouldn't be surprising if he just chooses to be homeless though. I wonder . . ." He opens his laptop, searching for a list of known street vagrants/beggars in Yokohama.

"Damn! Nothing. Now where could that bastard possibly live?"

We're both very invested at this point so we dig up the company employee records, thankfully Kunikida-san insists on keeping neat, meticulous ones. 

"Oh, look at this. An address not far from here."

"Let's go." Kunikida-san is already out the door, he looks ready to beat the crap out of Dazai-san when we find him.

—

We pull up at the small olive green house. It doesn't look like where someone rich would live but it looks cosy (certainly more so than a bin).

Kunikida-san jumps out of the car and starts pounding on the door. "Dazai, open up you sorry brat! We know you're in there! Come out RIGHT THIS INSTANT SO I CAN BEAT YOU WITH MY NOTEBOOK!!!" I can practically see the idealist's veins bulging.

The door opens and out steps . . . an old lady.

Kunikida-san and I both flush tomato red with embarrassment. 

"Well, hello. Aren't you two girls pretty? I don't have my wallet just now. If you'll give me a moment to get it, I'd be happy to buy some cookies from you." She disappears back into the house leaving Kunikida-san and I confused.

"Wha-"

She comes back smiling at Kunikida-san, "So what types of cookies do you two ladies have today?"

"Um actually ma'am, we're not Girl Guides*."

(A/N: *Girl Scouting was first introduced to Japan by Miss Muriel Greenstreet, a British missionary teacher, in 1919. The Movement gradually spread and in 1920 took the name Nihon Joshi Hododan (Girl Guides of Japan))

"Oh." she looks disappointed, "Well that's alright, how may I help you."

"For starters, my colleague and I are both very sorry for causing such a ruckus earlier. We thought someone else was dwelling here. We're looking for that person, a man named Dazai Osamu. We believe he used to live here."

"Oh, Dazai-san. Ah, yes he and his husband were such nice people. They helped me set up the house after I bought it from them. I always wonder what's happened to them."

Neither of us understand her words. Kunikida-san finally breaks the silence. "His . . . husband?"

"Oh yes, a lovely boy. Strangest hair I've ever seen but a great kid. They said they were buying a bigger house somewhere less crowded. Just out of the city I think, I always told them that there was nothing much there, lot's of crime, but they were determined. Something to be said about youth, I suppose." She smiles fondly, as if thinking of her own children.

We're both shocked at this news but we can't exactly question her.

"Thank you, for your help ma'am, if you know the exact name of the place could you please write it down."

"Oh yes, sure thing. Nothing bad has happened to them, right?"

Kunikida-san hesitates, "No."

"Oh good." she says handing him the piece of paper. He nods and we both bow, he sticks the paper in his notebook.

"Good day ma'am." I tell her and she waves sweetly.

—

When we're back in the car I sigh. "Well that was . . . unexpected. I had no idea Dazai-san liked men. You wouldn't know the way he flirts with that waitress downstairs, I wonder if his husband minds. Gosh, I still can't believe Dazai-san is married." I know I'm rambling but Kunikida-san doesn't tell me to shut up. He must be as surprised as I am. "Is his name even Dazai. Is that his birth name or did he change it after marriage. I wonder if they have children."

Kunikida-san shrugs, looking down at the paper with the name of the neighbourhood that the old woman gave us. He slams the brakes and several people honk at us. 

"What is it, Kunikida-san?"

"This address. It's in Port Mafia territory."

"Oh well, aren't there a few neighbourhoods on that side of the city? I'm sure it's just a coincidence, I mean he moved there a long time ago so he probably didn't know at the time. Maybe they didn't have that territory yet."

Kunikida-san's voice is a whisper as people swerve angrily around us. "It's right in the heart. Only about a 15 minutes drive from the Mafia's Headquarters."

"Oh. Well the house was probably built before the Mafia headquarters so he must not have known when he bought it, right?" I say not believing myself as I fight to think of a reasonable explanation to this bizarre situation, "What should we do?"

"We are detectives. we must investigate further." He says determinedly.

"Alright." I gulp at the thought of entering the notorious Mafia's territory. What if we run into Akutagawa? The thought makes me shiver and my leg prickles with the memory of the pain when the Rashoumon user sliced it clean off.

—

I keep my gaze out the window, watching the scenery slowly darken, watching houses become warehouses and industrial buildings as we travel further into Mafia territory. 

No one's tried to stop us . . . yet.

Thankfully Kunikida-san's car is rather inconspicuous. He parks it behind an abandoned warehouse and gets out. I follow his lead, but there's nothing to see besides storage facilities and factories

"Kunikida-san?" I ask nervously, a disturbing thought occurring to me, "you don't think that Dazai-san lives in a Port Mafia warehouse do you?" 

"It does seem like the thing one would do if they had a death wish," I almost squeak in fear but then I remember our surroundings.

Determined Kunikida-san keeps walking. Eventually we leave the area where most of the storage facilities are. There's an overgrown lot, but it looks somehow purposeful, like the wildflowers were planted and then allowed to grow this way.

We walk a bit through the tall flowers and then see it. A wearhouse, only it's fancier. It has nice glass windows with modern looking flower boxes and the corrugated steel siding is painted an even matte black, no grime or rust in sight. 

The shades are down but I can tell that lights are on because a warm yellow glow seeps out from them into the night. Above the original warehouse the owners have built an addition that looks like those modern homes you see in fancy magazines. A small white box not big enough to be a house on its own but still bigger than my dorm back at the agency. But the shades are down there too, so I can't see inside.

There's a garage just a little away from the house with tire tracks that suggest it's used often, but there are three individual tire tracks. One set from a car and one from what appears to be half a car. A motorbike? Dazai-san doesn't use one, maybe his mystery husband does?

"Is this really the only house around, Kunikida-san?"

"Yes I believe so." He says as we walk closer. 

Then, I see a noose rigged on a post in the front yard, and I know this must be Dazai-san's home.

At this point we're both tired and even Kunikida-san doesn't seem to have the energy to be angry at Dazai-san. Also it's such a nice calming house that it's hard to be angry here, although I'm sure Kunikida-san will find the will to be angry as soon as Dazai-san opens the door.

The door is nice, with a seasonal wreath of pine tree clippings and dried fall leaves and a lamp. The doormat says "Welcome"in big lettering with a tiny "(Just kidding, fuck off)" at the bottom, both in fancy cursive script.

Kunikida-san knocks, there's no answer. He knocks again, still nothing. Then once more, we hear two male voices, one Dazai-san's and another sounding familiar but distorted, then there's footsteps.

Dazai-san opens the door, wearing only a jumper and trousers, looking strange without his usual outfit. "Oh, it's you. I'm almost offended that you didn't notice my absence until now. I guess this proves you really don't need me for the paperwork. However it is a lot quieter here than at the office." He turns to me, the smug grin off his face replaced with a soft smile, clearly to spite Kunikida-san, "Sorry for keeping you waiting at the door, Atsushi-kun. Chibi didn't want to let me go."

"Chibi." I question, I think I've heard the name somewhere . . . but where?

"Ah, yes, my husband. He is rather short, you see, my very own dog."

"Do-" I start to ask about the nickname, but I'm cut off.

"I h-he-he'TSHIii-e'shiewww *sniff* heard that you bastard! *cough, cough, cough*" A congested voice from upstairs echoes. I swear for some reason that it's familiar. But why, it couldn't possibly be?

Dazai-san looks personally offended, "My love, you need to rest. You mustn't over exert yourself." he calls up the staircase. There's more footsteps and someone stomps down the staircase (I swear I can feel the ground beneath me shake just a little), coming into view slowly. His face is covered by the hood of a hoodie and a mask.

"I. Amb. Fucgkig. Fide." now that their closer I can tell that the voice is male, his words muffled as he barely conceals coughs into his elbow. Standing next to each other I can see what Dazai-san meant, his husband at full height comes only just above his shoulder.

"Hmm, Chibi doesn't sound fine." The worry is clear in Dazai-san's voice as he puts a hand on his husband's forehead. It's strange to see him being so caring and gentle like this.

Dazai-san's husband sniffs indignantly. "I'mb fide edough to kick your sorry ass!" His sickly tone and the way he sways on his feet contradict his words. 

Again I feel as if I recognized his voice but that isn't possible because I've never met him before. I mean, maybe I've seen him at the supermarket before and just didn't notice but it seems unlikely because I don't think I can afford the fancy supermarkets that people who live in this kind of house can shop at. I shop at the corner store. -^T-T^- (Your donations are very much welcome).

(A/N: Send our favourite -^weretiger^- boi some ¥en in the comments pls, so he can shop at a real supermarket lol. He's trying his best! Also if any of Chuuya's dialogue appears misspelt that's because I'm trying to show he is heavily congested. It probably just looks like I can't type, but I'm trying.)

Dazai-san puts his arm around his husband's waist to steady him. "You still have a temperature love, I really must insist that you go back to bed. I'll be there as soon as I deal with these visitors."

At the word visitors Dazai-san's husband looks up at us. I can see his face a bit more now just a sliver of fair faintly freckles skin and a set of piercing blue eyes. A foreigner? He speaks Japanese very well, he must have been here a long time. 

I wonder where he's originally from. Somewhere in Europe maybe? The United Kingdom, France, Germany, it can't be Holand because Dutch people are tall.

"Oh. It's you two. The detegdives." He says it with an amount of disdain in his voice that sounds rather unwarranted given that he's never even met us before. "Kindly, ged out ob by house." Despite the stuffiness of his voice it still scares me. I can see the threat in his eyes. It's almost . . . familiar. I know I have seen this look somewhere, but where? How did he know we're detectives, does Dazai-San talk about us at home? I guess it makes sense.

"Ah, yes." I can tell from Kunikida-san's voice that he feels the fear too, "We'll leave as soon as Dazai here tells us what he's been doing cutting work for the past week."

"A week! Preposterous!" Dazai-san exclaims, "It's only been three days."

"That's almost a full work week you FOOL!" Kunikida-san is close to exploding again. I really hope this doesn't escalate, I'd hate to leave a bad impression on Dazai-san's husband.

"Anyways, this is a lovely house you have. It must be scary though, living so close to Mafia territory." I ask hoping to redirect the conversation away from animosity and get some answers from Dazai-san. I think he can tell what I'm doing.

"Thank you for the compliments Atsushi-kun, I'm glad you like it." His politeness confuses me at first then I realise he must be teasing Kunikida-san. "But no actually, we feel very safe living here." He's gigling as he says it.

"Really?" I can't hide my surprise.

Dazai-san hmms in affirmation, he's about to say more when his husband shivers.

"Is Chibi cold?"

His husband says nothing.

"Yes, it is very cold, you shouldn't be so close to the open door, you'll only make your cold worse."

The husband looks like he wants to protest but retreats into the house anyways.

Dazai-san turns back to Kunikida-san and I.

"It really isn't a good idea to be letting all the warm air out, why don't you two come inside. Atsushi, would you like something warm to drink?" Dazai-san's voice drips with teasing sweetness and I don't miss how he disregarded Kunikida in his offer of refreshments.

"Um, I'm okay."

Dazai-san gives me a look, he knows me too well. "I promise you it's no trouble at all, I'm making Chibi and myself tea as well."

"Thank you."

He shuts the door behind us and we walk through the open floor to the kitchen counter where Dazai-san's husband is sitting.

"This really is a very nice house." I say because I can't think of anything else that wouldn't be considered rude.

Dazai-san's husband groans, "Why'd you led themb comb indside? Tha kid is gibing bme a headache."

Dazai-san pats his head affectionately, "Aw is Chibi pouting?"

His husband growls, or tries to but it comes out as a cough.

Dazai-san continues, "I let them in because it's the polite thing to do. Don't worry, I know dogs have no manners."

Dazai-san's husband huffs in annoyance I can tell isn't completely genuine. The interaction seems familiar, personal and I feel like I'm intruding so I look away.

When I turn I see the stand where the coats are kept.

It's a perfectly normal hatstand with seven "branches". The highest holds a long, tan trench coat, the second highest holds another trench coat, shorter than Dazai-san's and black with brown lapels . . . and hooked on top of the stand is an equally familiar black hat with brown trim.

This outfit I'd know anywhere even with the rest missing. The sight itself strikes fear into my heart, if the outfit is here it's owner must not be very far off. I scan the room making sure the mafia Executive won't suddenly appear and attack.

"Atsushi-kun!"

"What?" I ask, just registering that dazai-san has been calling my name.

"Your tea is ready. Is something the matter?"

"Why do you have Executive Nakahara-san's coat and hat? Did you steal them from him or something, because you should probably give them back, I bet he's mad. And since you live so close to the Port Mafia and all . . ." the sentence dies in my mouth when I notice the expression dazai-san wears.

He stares at me for a moment, cocking his head in a cat-like manner, and then he bursts out laughing.

"Dazai-san! How can you laugh, Executive Nakahara-san might really hurt you!" I try to emphasise the exact level of danger that my mentor has put himself in but he doesn't seem to get it.

Dazai-san's husband is laughing as well at this point but it trunks into vicious coughing and draws all our attention away from the predicament for a moment. 

"Be gentle with your throat, love, you have such a pretty voice."

When Dazai-san's husband recovers his breath he turns around to me with a look of incredulity. "Is dis kid jogkig?" Dazai-san's husband somehow still manages to sound sarcastic even through the congestion.

"I don't think so, my love, have your tea."

"I deed wine if I'm godda dead with dis shid."

Dazai-san shakes his head stubbornly, "Nu-uh! No alcohol for sick Chibis."

"Ugh, den ged themb oud, I wand to sleeb."

"Aww, but we haven't even told them yet."

Dazai-san's husband frowns.

"Come on, I'll give you a massage if you stay up just a bit more, hmm?"

"Fide!"

"Umm, told us what, Dazai-san? What about Executive Nakahra's coat and hat?"

He looks at me like he's forgotten we were here but it's obviously an act.

"Oh, yes, that. I didn't steal it, and it's actually Executive Dazai now."

"Wha-" my brain short circuits

Kunikida seems to process this faster than I do.

"You've joined the Port Mafia? Why!? How long have you been a double agent!?" Kunikida tries to lunge for Dazai-san but he's on the ground before I can blink. I see the surprise in dazai's eyes, he hadn't been expecting this.

I try to slow my thoughts down so I can fully observe the situation.

Dazai-san's husband stands with his foot on Kunikida-san's chest, the hood of his sweatshirt fallen down displaying his bright red hair with its unique cut. These features I'd know anywhere. Kunikida-san's eyes bulge practically out of their socket, he sputters under the weight of the man.

I scream in delayed reaction to the Gravity Manipulator's sudden appearance. Everyone turns to face me, they all look down so I do too, My feet and hands have turned into paws from the shock.

Even Executive Nakahara looks startled.

"Well, that was unexpected, but my love, you're still ill, now is hardly the time for fighting."

My love? What is going on here? 

Executive Nakahara steps away, leaning heavily on Dazai-san Kunikida-san scrambles to his feet, notebook brandishing out in front of him like a sword.

"What are you doing here?"

"He lives here," Dazai-san says simply, "He's Executive Dazai, not me. Don't you worry Kunikida, my loyalties are still firm. I am loyal to Chuuya, not the Port Mafia."

Kunikida-san looks ready to blow up so I ask the obvious next question.

"Why is Naka- Chuuya-san using your last name, is he trying to make a fake identity?"

No, Chuuya took my last name. Such a thieving chibi!" my mentor laughs, "Actually, I gave it to him."

Kunikida-san's eyes roll back in his head and he falls to the floor with a dull thud.

I start to go over to him but my mentor waves his hand dismissively, "Leave him there."

"You debanded I tage it, you basdard!" the Mafai executive corrects, sounding sicker than ever.

My mentor ignores his words, planting a kiss over on top of his head. "Anyway, there are many ways these things are decided in same gender marriages but since I'm taller than Chibi it was only logical that he take my name."

The Executive all but growls. It all falls into place, I should've known. Dazai-san always calls Chhuya-san Chibi when we have to work with the Port Mafia on missions. I feel stupid, it should have been obvious as soon as I saw the blue eyes and red hair.

"And to answer your original question, that is why his coat is here. We don't feel unsafe here because everyone is afraid of us, also the added convenience of being close to Chibi's job."

"Why are they afraid of you Dazai-san?" as the question comes out I wonder if I should clarify who I'm directing the question to.

"Oh, I used to be in the Port Mafia."

"WHATTT!!!???" these words have snapped Kunikida-san out of his unconscious spell

"Ah, the idealist finally awakens. I hope your little fainting spell hasn't messed up your schedule too badly." Dazai-san mocks

Kunikida-san struggles to get himself upright, his face as red as when "Well, Mafia or no, where have you been for the past week."

"Three days" Dazai-san corrects again.

Kunikida-san clenches his notebook tighter as if he's imagining strangling his collage, I think he might be.

"Isn't it obvious?" dazai-san asks the room

Neither Kunikida-san nor I answer.

"My beloved Chibi here has come down with a most nasty cold. I could hardly leave him home alone to suffer in this state, now could I?" He massages Chuuya's shoulders as he asks the rhetorical question. I can see the executive starting to sink into sleep.

He looks so harmless and I really do feel badly for him. 

"I see, we're– I'm sorry for intruding. I, uh, hope you feel better Chuuya-san."

"Thank you, Atsushi-kun–" dazai-san is cut off by footsteps on the stairs, small and light, not at all like Chuuya's aggressive stomp.

"Father? Papa?" A small boy stands on the landing leaning sleepily against the railing. His hair is dark brown and his eyes are large hazel orbs of innocence. He can't be older than five. He holds a toy slingshot and it's aimed right at me.

"My, my, what is Saku-chan doing up so late?" Dazai-san coos sweetly at the boy who comes down the stairs, slingshot still aimed, ready to fire. His father laughs, "Put that down, this is Atsushi-kun, he just stopped by for a visit."

"Oh. Sowy 'sushi" His sleep-induced slur and baby talk make the words utterly adorable.

"It's fine." I tell the young boy.

"Is Kyu-chan awake as well?"

"No." 

"Oh that's good, I'd hate for all this yelling to hurt their ears."

He turns back to me, laughing as he catches the sleeping executive as he slips to the floor. "Thank you for visiting Atsushi, but I'm afraid we're all a bit tired this late at night."

Dazai-san's sudden manners take me by surprise. "Oh, of course, Kunikida and I shouldn't overstay our welcome. You four?" Dazai-san nods in confirmation, "have a very good night."

"And you as well."

I nod, taking the hand of a dazed Kunikida-san and leading him out of the door. Tonight was certainly interesting. 

(A/N: Sorry about this ending I was having loads of trouble with it. It isn't as intense as I would've liked on the relationship reveal part. I guess my brain was just in fluff mode, but I'm not upset about the way this turned out, I guess. I may edit later. If you like it pls let me know. Also for clarification Soukoku has two kids, Sakunosuke (named after Oda) and Q is also their kid in this fic.)