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skijumpingf1 · 20 hours ago

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Suddenly meeting you felt different – 2019 Engelberg (D. Prevc X D. Tande)

While we all are going through it with Stephans retirement I can offer you a tiny bit distraction with a Domiel fic (I hope). This is a prequel to my other Domiel fics (first one is here) and its where Domen and Daniel got together in my head. It has lots of oblivious Domen, a bit of Peter and Domen stress and a charming Daniel in it. I hope you enjoy it.

Wordcount: 5318

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“If someone has the right to be mad today it’s me. Your 13th place is good. So, why are you looking like you want to murder someone?” A voice appears next to me and gets me out of my thoughts. A voice that I can recognize everywhere. Daniel- André Tande is standing next to me, fully changed, and he is watching me as I bind my shoes. We are still at the hill. Around us there are thousands of fans who are cheering for the best jumpers. There are all sorts of people in the changing area next to us. A German physio, a Swiss pr person and obviously our colleagues. Colleagues that are changing or waiting for their teammates to jump. I look up to Daniel and all the noise around us disappears. “Peter beat me again.” Is my answer to his question as if it would explain my mood for anyone but me. Objectively I should be happy for Peter. He is my brother after all. But after the season three years ago my sense of brotherly proudness is not as strong as it should be. Not, when I know how it feels when your better than your legendary older brother. I stand up. Daniel is a bit taller than me, so I still tilt my head to look him in the eyes. To my surprise Daniel nods understanding. “It must suck to be constantly compared to him.” Before I can say something in response, my brother shows up and pats me on the back. “Come on. We have to get back to the hotel.”, he speaks in Slovenian. I roll my eyes because Peter is standing behind me and won’t see it. Daniel however notices and smirks at me. “Oh, Daniel. Such a shame today. I´m sure tomorrow will be better.” My brother finally let’s go of my back to shake Daniels Hand, who is still smirking at me. I shake my head and press my lips together to repress the smile that’s building on my face. It was nice that someone wasn’t in awe whenever the big Peter Prevc talks to them. “We´ll see. But I’m optimistic.” I put my backpack on and straighten my beanie. Shortly my gaze lands on the hill. One of Daniels Teammates is jumping. His last. He missed Marius while speaking to me and Peter. I can see that the jump from Forfang wasn’t that good, but Daniel should be there in the outrun to congratulate him. “You should probably go to your teammates.” Everyone else from team Norway is already waiting for Johann. Daniels eyes widen when he sees his teammate. “Oh shit. See you later.” With that Daniel is running away. I look after him until he is blocked by his teammates. Peter glances at me and gestures in the direction of the exit. “We should really get going.”

“I don’t understand why you don’t even try it. You could make dreams come true. The girls on the hill would fold if you made a move on them.” I forgot my headphones in my hotel room, and I never missed them more than right now. Since we left the hill in this cramped minivan, Anze and Tilen are practically cornering Timi. They are trying to convince Timi to start hooking up with girls on competition weekends. Apparently, both of them just want to help Timi find his true love, but I know that they just want a bit of drama. The season is long and it’s much more fun when you have something to gossip about. Poor Timi is trying everything he can to change the subject, but he is failing miserably. They sit in the middle row, while Peter, Rok and I are in the back. Rok and I exchange looks here and there but we try to avoid getting to much attention on us. We both don’t want to be the next target. One of the positives of having Peter as my brother and teammate is that I´m typically excluded by these kinds of conversations. But today he has other plans. “Domen, when are you bringing a girl home?” I nearly drop my phone when Peter speaks up. Suddenly all eyes fall onto me. I can see that Timi is muttering a quite thank you in my direction. “What?” Peter raises his eyebrow at me. Thank God Rok is in the middle of us and a physical barrier because I know that Peter would like to put his arm around me now. “Right Domen. How is your love life going?”, says Tilen and grins at me. Sometimes I hate this guy. I lean back in my seat and cross my arms in front of my chest. “What love life?” There is a collective sigh from Tilen and Anze after my answer. I can feel Peters gaze on me, but I just ignore it. It´s none of Peter’s business. “Come on, Domen. You are 20. When I was your age, I was already with Mina. And I know how it is when your 20. You can tell me that you don’t have someone.” To my surprise Peter presses the topic further. I don’t know what happened today that he suddenly feels the urge to get into my love life. It can’t be something good. I look at my brother who frowns his face. For a quick moment our eyes meet before I turn me head to the front again. “Well, I don’t. And considering Timi is also still single it doesn’t seem too uncommon.”

I never have been more thankful that we arrived at the hotel. Peter didn’t get another shot at pressing that topic. Tilen, my roommate for the weekend, notices quickly that he shouldn’t mention the conversation from the car once we stepped into our small hotel room in Engelberg. My facial expression is enough to keep him quiet. I don’t spend too much time in our room. Just the usual procedure of putting the suits and other equipment away. “I´m going on a walk. If my brother shows up just tell him its none of his business where I am.” I zip my jacket up. Engelberg is always one of the world cups with winter feelings. Probably because Christmas is just around the corner. And there is rarely a year where it didn’t snow. So, I take my gloves and my hat with me. “Oh, come on Domen. It wasn’t that bad. Peter just wants the best for you. No need to be grumpy all evening.”, is Tilen´s response. I shrug. Objectively he is right. It were a few silly questions but what Tilen doesn’t know is that Pero found a sore point for me. “No worries. I promise I won’t be grumpy for the rest of the day. I just want a few moments of peace. Maybe I call Nika and Ema. I haven’t spoken to them in ages.” Tilen doesn’t look too convinced but lets me go.

The way through the hotel is quiet. Barely any other guests are around. I would guess that two thirds of the rooms are occupied by ski jumpers and my colleagues are busy with getting settled in. Lucky for me then, I can slip out of the hotel without anyone notice. The cool fresh air hits my face, and I can finally breath again. I love this kind of weather. Clear sky with minus degrees. Nothing is more peaceful. It’s almost dark in the Swiss alps and I can spot stars once I tilt my head towards the sky. Slowly I wander into the forest next to the hotel. The trees are loaded with snow. The atmosphere here is just magical. From my short jogging trip this morning I know that there was a bench not far from the hotel but deep enough to get a bit of silence. I am not keen on getting lost in the alps during a competition weekend, so a long walk is off the cards. My orientation always sucked and long walks in an unknow area would just challenge my luck. When I take the turn in direction of the bench, I spot someone in the dim light of the streetlamp. Great now I couldn’t even have my peace here. Before I turn around to go back to the hotel, I examine who stole my bench. To my surprise it is someone I know. Daniel-André Tande spots me at the same time as I spot him. He raises his arm and waves at me. A small smile appears on my face while I go to the bench. Daniel is one of the few people I could tolerate right now. He grins at me, and his lovely smile brings me to smile even brighter.

“Who is responsible for your bad mood? Not me I hope.”, speaks Daniel as soon I was close enough to hear him. Apparently, my face is enough to tell that I am still pissed. I shake my head. “No not you.” The Norwegian pats next to him and I sit down. He is similar dressed as me. We both wear our team jacket with the matching beanie. But he didn’t bring his gloves. I bet his hands are cold. It’s so cold outside that I can see my breath. Daniel eyes me up from the side. “It’s your brother again?”, he guesses correctly. I sigh loudly. “Am I that predictable?” Daniel gives me a half-smile and leans back against the bench. “Well, normally you are not very emotional. When you are there are usually two reasons. The first has to do with ski jumping but your jumps weren’t that bad for you to still be mad. Option two is always Peter.” I press my lips together. He is right. Just Peter has the ability to make me really frustrated. “What did he do?” With crossed arms I also lean back against the back of the bench. I kick a stone in front of my feet while I try to come up with words that explain the situation but don’t let me look like a maniac. “He wants to know stuff that’s none of his business and he doesn’t take no for an answer. I mean, when I say I don’t have a girlfriend, why press the issue? It’s just annoying. Sometimes I wish -.” Daniel raises an eyebrow at me. I don’t want to continue my sentence. Not in front of Daniel who lost a brother. I lower my head a bit. He notices where my thoughts are. A small smile appears on his face. I can see that it is not really a happy smile, but he tries. “It’s okay. I know how it is with siblings. I understand.” Still, it’s a bit insensitive complaining about my perfectly healthy brother in front of Daniel. Especially since I don’t know how he is coping with the loss.

“How do you know when your attracted to someone?” It is a radical change of subject. Even I know that, but it was the only way out of the difficult situation. I can feel my cheeks burning up which means I’m probably blushing. As best as I can I try to hide it by sinking deeper into my jacket, but I don’t think it is helping much. Daniel next to me is starting to laugh. So much that he is throwing his head back. This is making me blush even harder. When Danile is done with his outburst his face is as red as mine. A few of his blonde strands came loose under his beanie and are now falling in his face. I feel the urge to brush them out of his face but keep my hands to myself. “Did you really just ask that?” I shrug. It is a valid question for me. Even if timing and the person I’m asking it too is a bit strange. “Yeah, I suppose I did. But honestly, how do you know? I mean of course, I recognize a pretty girl somewhere but like what is the next step? Is that it? Or are there deeper things that come to attraction?” Daniels smile softens a bit. “Oh, you are really serious. Sorry I didn’t mean to laugh. I just thought that was your bad try at changing the topic.” “True. It was a bad try at changing the subject. The question was the only thing on my mind. It’s just that I´m 20 now and I thought by now I would have figured out how everything works. But to be honest, I have no clue. When Peter asked about a girlfriend earlier it just made me realize it.”

With a quick motion I remove my beanie and let my hand go through my hair. It is my way of giving me a bit of comfort. I don’t know why I started to tell Daniel of all people one of my most private thoughts. Maybe it is just the way Daniel is. He always seems so genuine and like he really cares. Daniel shifts a bit so that he is facing me. His hands are buried in the depth of his pockets. Maybe I should offer my gloves to him. Its freezing cold out here in the Swiss alps. It would only be fair when he listens to my problems. Before I can do it though, Daniel starts to talk. “Attraction to me means that I want to be close to another person. Physically and mentally. You just want to be with them, get to know them and touch them. You know there is a difference between sexual and romantic attraction. As far as I know someone can be just attracted to someone sexually or romantically but not the other. That never happened to me so far so I can’t really differentiate between those two.” So, it’s more than just to find someone pretty. I suspected that. Did I ever had the urge to get closer to a person? Like really close? Daniel tilts his head to the right and looks me over. My hands are firmly clenching onto my beanie. “Don’t worry about it, Domen. It’s perfectly normal if you still trying to figure things out. In your teenage years you were busy with leading the world cup. Of course you didn’t have time to think about stuff like this. Heck, even I am trying to understand everything, and I would say I´m pretty secure in my sexuality. And if you never feel attraction, it’s also perfectly normal.” Hearing my friend say those words gets me to release a breath I did not know I was holding. If I talked with Peter or any other teammate about this topic, they would have never made me feel normal about this. “Thanks. I think I just needed to hear that I’m normal. I am that kind of person that always assume the worst so it nice to know that other people are also unsure about stuff like this.” Daniel places his hands around mine. A nice warmth is spreading through me. The first time since I started this conversation, I look into Daniels light eyes. “Domen, everything about sexuality and attraction is normal. I know that everything outside of the norm is scary at first, but I promise you will eventually come to terms with it. Trust me I have experience with it.” I raise an eyebrow. What is that supposed to mean? He notices what he said and presses his lips together. I can see that he considers his options. What to tell, what not to tell. Before he can say something, I start: “You don’t have to feel obligated to share anything with me just because I did. On another note, do you want my gloves? Your hands are probably freezing.” I give Daniel an escape if he doesn’t want to talk about it but he just chuckles. “Oh, I promise you if I don’t want to talk about it, I wouldn’t. I would appreciate if you kept it to you, though. The reason why I can guess how you fell is because I had similar feelings growing up until I realized that I’m into guys. So yeah, I’m gay.” I open my mouth again and close it again. What are you to say when someone comes out? I have never been in this situation. Somewhere I probably read ways to response to a coming up but right now nothing comes to my mind. I try it with an understanding nod and smile at him. “Thank you for sharing it with me. Of course I will keep it a secret.” Daniel grins at me. “How hard was it for you coming up with an appropriate response?" I cover my faces with my hands and the beanie. Why is Daniel the one person that can read me like a book? All of my other friends, my teammates and even my family could just guess what is going on in my brain. But not Danny. He always knows what I´m thinking. Sometimes even before I knew. We´re not even that close. Sure, we talk here and there but normally he isn’t my vent.

My phone rings and delays my need to answer. I don’t even have to look at it to know that it is Peter who is calling me. I raise from the bench and shot an apologizing look to my colleague. It was unnecessary to walk a few steps away from the bench since Daniel doesn’t speak Slovenian, but I still do it. Without the lamp that lights up the bench and its surroundings it’s pretty dark in the forest. “What?” My voice is pretty harsh. So harsh that even I feel sorry for it. “Where are you? Tilen said you went on a walk but apparently you are already gone for over an hour. It’s almost time for dinner.” In disbelief, I look at my phone screen. It was almost eight. It didn’t feel like I was out here for that long but with good company time can fly. I gaze over to Daniel who tries to not look to invested in my phone call. The light of the streetlamp is shining directly at him and makes him glow. He seems a bit cold. Since I left the bench, he cuddled himself in his jacket. He probably did not think to be out here that long. It was my fault that he was freezing. If I just turned around, he would have been back in the hotel already. “I forgot the time to be honest. I met Daniel and we talked for a bit. But I promise I´m on my way back.” “Daniel?” “You know Daniel. He is blonde and from Norway. You met him before.”, is my sarcastic response. Which other Daniel would I spent time with? Even Peter would know that. I slip out of one glove and throw it at Daniel who frowns. Then the second one hits him in the face. “Well, we can talk about it later. You really need to come back to the Hotel.” I roll my eyes. Even I am not dumb enough to miss diner. “Yes. See you soon.”

“What´s up with the terror attack?”, raises Daniel one of my gloves in the air. “Be thankful I´m concerned for the wellbeing of your hands. In other news, we have to get back to the hotel. Its nearly eight.” The Norwegian grabs his phone from one of his pockets. “Shit. You’re right.” With a little jump he hops from the bench and catches up with me while he simultaneously slips into the gloves. He is a bit taller than me, and I have to look up to see him in his eyes. “Was my response even appropriate?” We start to walk into the direction of the hotel. The forest looks even more wintery then on the way here. Everywhere is snow. “No worries. It was very proper. But back to you. Did our conversation bring you any clarity?” “It’s nice to know that I´m normal but other than that not really.” I wish it would be clearer now, but I am still confused. I don’t know if I ever felt more for a person than just platonic stuff and just didn’t notice or just didn’t feel that way. If I don’t feel the need for a romantic or sexual relationship, would I just be alone for the rest of my life? Because I certainly don’t want to. It was nice talking to someone. “If I was you, I would start to look into sexuality in general. It’s not black and white. Not just straight or gay. You could be bisexual or pansexual. Maybe you are Demisexual, that’s when you just feel attraction to someone who you already close to. Asexuality is also a possibility but I´m 96 precent sure that you are not asexual.” We come closer to the hotel. Its already getting lighter out here. We walk relatively fast. Both of us need to get to diner on time. “Why are you sure I´m not asexual?” My hands are deeply buried in my jacket when we step out of the forest. Daniel gives me a half-smile. “You will figure it out.”, he winks at me before he opens the hotel door for me. I narrow my eyes. “That doesn’t help me?” Inside the hotel we are greeted with hot air. Daniel grins at me and shakes his head. “I will see you, Prevc.” Then he disappears into the dining hall.

When I enter the dining hall my teammates greet me with a curious look. Even some other tables with different nation are interested that I´m late. As if this was uncommon. I am late fifty percent everywhere I go. With fast steps I get to the table and sit next to Tilen and Timi. Sadly, it is the place directly across of my brother. A plate of food is in front of me. My teammates already ate most of their food. I can feel that this dinner will be an awful experience. “Nice that you finally decided to join us.” Instead of answering my brother I put a fork with rice into my mouth. From across the room, I can feel Daniels eyes on me. For a quick moment I look over to him. He is laughing with his team but here on there he is looking at me. His expression is a bit worried, but he smiles nearly shyly at me. “Domen?” Timis voice gets me to pay attention to my team. All eyes were on me. “What?” Tilen chuckles. “How was your walk?” “Cold.” I don’t know why they tried to start a conversation with me. Clearly, I need to catch up with eating. They should talk to each other. Pero seems not satisfied with my answer. “How did you meet Daniel?” I repress the urge to roll my eyes. “He was sitting on a bench. It would have been rude if I didn’t talk to him.” It is none of Peter’s business that I actually really enjoyed talking to the Norwegian.

In record time I finish my plate. Thankfully the others understood at some point that I just wanted to eat in peace and talked to each other. Rok was the next victim of Tilen and Anze. I listen to them pressuring Rok to get a dating app. The Norwegians are quicker than us with Diner. Daniel waves at me as they leave the room. “Since when are you and Daniel that close?” Timi steals a tomato from my plate as he waits for my answer to his question. I shrug. “We have been friends since I joined the world cup. He was one of the only ones who took my serious and did not compare me with Peter every five minutes.” Also, he is interesting. It is fun talking to him even if it is hard topics like today. It rarely gets awkward with him. Even after his coming out, we continue to talk about it normally. I bet if Timi for example would come out to me it would have been awkward. Obviously, I would support him but something in our dynamic would make it awkward. But not with Danny. “He interrupted your precious alone time, and he is still alive? I just want to know the trick.” Timi says after he steals another tomato. “Maybe it´s just because he isn’t a dickhead.” My plate is finally finished, and I stand up. Last to arrive, first to leave. A motto that I like to follow. I feel Peros eyes on me when I leave the dining room. Tilen would probably spend the evening with Anze and Timi and I could go to my room. Technically at least. The thought of spending the evening in my tiny hotel room alone makes me anxious. After today I could you use a bit of training. Just a light jog on the treadmill. Maybe a short ride on the trainings bike.

When I leave my hotel room in direction of the gym, Tilen hasn’t shown up yet. He really went to the room of Timi and Anze. Sometimes I get a little jealous thinking about the close bond my teammates had. I know that I´m not helping the relationship with my behaviour. Sometimes I tried being a little nicer, but it is hard to connect with them, I think while stepping into the elevator. I look into the mirror in the elevator. Somewhere I read that elevator often had mirror to make them feel larger and not so cramped. I couldn’t relate to that. Seeing my face, my stressed face, everywhere makes me want to throw up. Gosh, what is wrong with me. One diner with the team and my good mood from talking to Daniel was gone. I run my hand through my hair.

The training room is surprisingly not empty. I can hear the rhythm steps on the treadmill before I enter the hotel gym. “Is this becoming a habit?”, jokes Daniel when I walk through the door. He is on the treadmill. His face is a bit red from the workout but in a weird way it suits him. With every step his hair is bouncing up and down. I remove my towel from my neck and put it on one of the benches. The gym is lightened by a few ugly neon lights. For my liking it´s a bit small but for just Daniel and me it should be alright. “Is everything okay?” Daniel stops his run when I don’t answer. Honestly, I didn’t even realize that I gave no answer. For a few seconds I consider lying but it is Daniel. He will figure it out. “I don’t want to vent on you again.” He moves from the gym equipment and takes his blue towel. With a few steps he is next to me and lets himself down on the nearest weightlifting bench. But instead of using it, he just looks at me. “We are having a conversation, Domen. Also, I like being your vent. But I will promise you, when I have something to talk about, I will come to you. Then we will be even.” Daniel always looks so kind I couldn't say no to that face. So, I start talking. “I don't know what it is to be honest. Everything me team does or says annoys me. I know it’s bad. Especially because I feel like an outcast already. I just feel like they don’t get me. When I try being honest with them, they always look at me like I’m crazy, but when I keep to myself, I’m getting grumpy.” Obviously, they are also very competitive. They are professional athletes so they should be. Ever since I was that good with 17 my thinking towards results was a bit damaged. I knew that. Honestly, I should work on it. My jumps should be more important than the place in the ranking. It’s hard when my jumps feel almost as good as when I was 17 but I’m not first. They just don’t get it. It makes communicating with them harder and not just on sports level. Personally, it’s very different for them then for me. I am in the spotlight since I was 16. 16! I was a child back then. My behaviour back than was chaotic to say the least. I learned to keep to myself to not embarrass myself in front of the press and even my team. To say it’s hard to get rid of this is an understatement.

“Have you tried talking to them?” “Sure. Of course. It´s so easy for me to talk to people.”, is my sarcastic response. I nod energetic before I shake my head. “But honestly no. I don’t talk to them about anything.” I let myself slide down the wall until I sit on the naked and cold floor. Daniel is leaning forward a bit. He is just half a meter from my away. I can see a few stubbles on his face. He bits his lips and my attention is drawn to his mouth. Daniel has beautiful lips. “But you talk to me.” “It is easy talking to you. You understand me and don’t make me feel like an idiot for my idiotic thoughts.” And then suddenly it makes click. On the cold floor in a gym in Engelberg I realize it. The reason why talking to Daniel is just so much easier than talking to anyone else. The reason why I like spending time with him. The reason my attention is on things like his lips or his blonde hair. I open my mouth and close it again. What am I supposed to say now? I can’t tell Daniel that. Just because he is into men doesn’t necessarily mean he is into me. I lower my head and stare at the floor. “Stand up, Domci.” He uses my nickname. I didn’t even know that he knows it. Daniel is raising from the bench and is walking towards me. He holds a hand for me out, and I take it because he is Daniel, and I trust him. When I stand in front of him a little half-smile appears on his face. A few centimetres are between us, but we are basically touching. My heart starts racing. Slowly he raises one hand to my cheek. I simply watch. My eyes follow the movement until his skin touches mine. A pleasant prickle runs through my body. So that’s how attraction feels. Without thinking about it, I close the gap between us and kiss him. Daniel lets out a surprised gasp before he pulls my closer with his other hand. My whole body is on fire when I press myself against him. I let my hand go through Daniels hair. A motion that I wanted to do so often, and I never realized. Breathless Daniel is parting our lips, but his hand stays firmly around my waist and on my cheek. “See I told you; you aren’t asexual.” I punch him lightly into his shoulder. Gosh, he really knows me better than myself. “How long have you known?” He smirks at me and raises his shoulders. Then he leans in and gives me another kiss. “I know it since like five minutes ago, but I suspected you had a thing for me since you were 16.” “I am so stupid.”, I laugh, and Daniel joins me. “A bit.” He takes one of my hands in his and intertwines his fingers with mine. “Just to be clear. You like me too? Because these social norms aren’t really my thing.” Daniel rolls with his eyes, which is normally more my thing to do. “Yes Silly. I like you too.” With that he kisses me again.

#ski jumping #domen prevc #daniel andre tande #domiel #sj fic #i am not really satisfied with it #and has been lingering on my laptop for probably six months #but i figured it wont get better so here you go #this mentions Daniels brother so trigger warning for a dead family member #but it doe not feature any details

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