#Dallas pun collection

[punsify1]

Laugh Out Loud With 200+ Hilarious Dallas Puns And Jokes Perfect For Texans And Dallas Fans

Everything’s bigger in Texas, including the laughs! If you’re looking to add some humor to your day with a Lone Star twist, then these Dallas puns are just what you need.

From clever quips about Big D’s famous landmarks to wordplay inspired by Texan culture, this collection of over 200 puns is bound to leave you in stitches.

Whether you’re a local, a visitor, or just a fan of the city, these puns will have you laughing all the way to the Lone Star State. Don’t miss out on our other hilarious puns that will keep you entertained and grinning from ear to ear.

10 Dallas Puns to Light Up Your Day

Why don’t Dallasites ever get lost? They always follow the “steak” signs! 🥩

How do you know when a cowboy is in love? He’s “roped” into it! 🤠

What’s a Dallas resident’s favorite dance move? The “Texas Two-Funny”! 💃

Why did the rodeo clown break up with his girlfriend? She kept “horsing” around! 🐴

How do you fix a broken BBQ? Use “Grill Glue”! 🍖

What do you call a Dallas Cowboy with a great joke? A “Touchdown-teller”! 🏈

Why did the Texan start a bakery? To “butter” up his neighbors! 🧈

How do you recognize a Dallas resident at a music festival? They’re always “ranching” out! 🎶

What’s a cowboy’s favorite type of music? “Country Puns-ic”! 🎸

Why did the chili pepper visit Dallas? To add some “spice” to the city! 🌶️

Read: Dallas Puns 200+ Jokes That Will Have You Laughing All the Way to the Lone Star.

[kneedeepincynade]

A little step toward a better world has just been achieved today,as the communists form a government in Nepal openly challenging Indian imperialism and the buthan puppet government

The post is machine translated

The translation is at the bottom

The collective is on telegram

⚠️ IL NEPAL AVRÀ UN GOVERNO COMUNISTA, VITTORIA GEOPOLITICA PER IL PARTITO COMUNISTA CINESE ⚠️

🇨🇳|🇳🇵 Il 12 settembre, Li Zhanshu - Presidente del Comitato Permanente dell'Assemblea Nazionale del Popolo Cinese - si è recato in Nepal, per un incontro sia con Bidhya Devi Bhandari - Presidente del Nepal - che con i vertici dei due partiti comunisti:

🔺CPN-UML - il cui Segretario è Khadga Prasad Sharma Oli 🚩

https://www.cpnuml.org/

🔺CPN-MC - il cui Segretario Generale è Dev Gurung, ma la figura più importante del partito è Pushpa Kamal Dahal, conosciuta come "Prachanda", un ex-guerrigliero maoista 🚩

https://www.cpnmc.org/

✈️ Si trattava, al tempo, della terza Visita di Alto Livello di un membro del Partito Comunista Cinese in Nepal, dopo quella di Wang Yi - Ministro degli Affari Esteri della RPC, e Liu Jinchao - Direttore del Dipartimento degli Affari Esteri del Comitato Centrale del Partito Comunista Cinese, che si occupa delle relazioni tra il CPC e partiti politici esteri, come il Partito Comunista del Vietnam o il Partito Rivoluzionario del Popolo Lao ⭐️

🧾 Il 20 novembre, in un clima "bollente", si sono svolte le elezioni in Nepal, e le formazioni si sono presentate in questo modo:

📄 La "Coalizione dei 5 Partiti", una sorta di miscuglio - essenzialmente guidato dall'opportunismo - che aveva iniziato a guidare il paese dopo il litigio tra Oli e Prachanda nel 2020. In tale coalizione, che presentava i medesimi partiti della coalizione di governo, vi era il Partito del Congresso, un partito politico pro-India e pro-USA, così come l'MC di Prachanda (❗️), che si trovava lì per motivi opportunistici più che ideologici.

📄 L'UML - guidato da Khadga Prasad Sharma Oli - come unico partito d'opposizione.

📊 Le elezioni in Nepal si dividono in "Party List" e "Constituency" - l'UML aveva preso 26,95% nel PL e 30,83% nel Constituency, mentre il Congresso 25,71% e 23,19%, e l'MC 11,13% e 9,37%.

🏵 Alle elezioni, l'UML ha trionfato in quasi tutte le regioni, ma la C5P - se unita - superava di gran lunga l'UML, anche se mancavano due seggi per l'ottenimento della maggioranza.

🇮🇳|🇺🇸 In ogni caso, sembrava fatta per una vittoria di una coalizione pro-India e pro-USA guidata dal Partito del Congresso, che aveva in mente di accettare un pacchetto da 500 milioni di dollari dagli USA, un vero e proprio "acquisto di sovranità" da parte degli imperialisti statunitensi, che avevano intenzione di trasformare il Nepal nell'ennesimo fantoccio anti-Cinese e anti-comunista.

↩️ Invece, nei giorni precedenti, Prachanda - leader dell'MC - ha iniziato a mostrare un dissapore nei confronti della C5P, rea - secondo lui - di aver tradito le promesse pre-elezioni.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/2022/12/26/maoist-leader-prachanda-emerges-nepals-next-prime-minister/

⭐️ Inoltre, Dev Gurung - SG del Centro Maoista - ha iniziato a proporre l'idea di una coalizione comunista, e così, sia lui che Prachanda, hanno iniziato a dialogare con Khadga Prasad Sharma Oli 🚩

🇨🇳 Wang Xin - Ambasciatore Cinese in Nepal - ha intensificato gli incontri politici con i partiti comunisti del Nepal, con l'obiettivo di costruire l'unità per poter governare.

🇳🇵Inoltre, Barsaman Pun - membro del Centro Maoista, ed ex guerrigliero - è tornato velocemente in Nepal dalla Cina, per contribuire - come affermato da Khabarhub, media nepalese - alla costruzione dell'unità tra i comunisti.

🇳🇵E così, nonostante le alte probabilità di un nuovo governo pro-India e pro-USA, ieri - 25 dicembre - è stata annunciata l'alleanza tra i comunisti, tra l'UML e il MC, con Pushpa Kamal Dahal - Prachanda - come nuovo Primo Ministro.

🇳🇵|🇮🇳|🇨🇳 Il Nepal è da sempre in orbita pro-India, pertanto un tale capovolgimento - il secondo, per giunta, ma questa volta dovrebbe essere più stabile - rappresenta un'enorme vittoria geopolitica, nonché ideologica, del Partito Comunista Cinese.

🌸 Iscriviti 👉 @collettivoshaoshan

⚠️ NEPAL WILL HAVE A COMMUNIST GOVERNMENT, GEOPOLITIC VICTORY FOR THE COMMUNIST PARTY OF CHINA ⚠️

🇨🇳|🇳🇵 On September 12, Li Zhanshu - Chairman of the Standing Committee of the National People's Congress of China - went to Nepal, for a meeting with both Bidhya Devi Bhandari - President of Nepal - and with the leaders of the two parties communists:

🔺CPN-UML - whose Secretary is Khadga Prasad Sharma Oli 🚩

https://www.cpnuml.org/

🔺CPN-MC - whose General Secretary is Dev Gurung, but the most important figure of the party is Pushpa Kamal Dahal, known as "Prachanda", an ex-Maoist guerrilla 🚩

https://www.cpnmc.org/

✈️ It was, at the time, the third High-Level Visit of a member of the Communist Party of China to Nepal, after that of Wang Yi - Minister of Foreign Affairs of the PRC, and Liu Jinchao - Director of the Foreign Affairs Department of the Central Committee of the Communist Party of China, which deals with the relationship between the CPC and foreign political parties, such as the Communist Party of Vietnam or the Lao People's Revolutionary Party ⭐️

🧾 On November 20, in a "hot" climate, elections were held in Nepal, and the formations presented themselves as follows:

📄 The "Coalition of 5 Parties", a sort of hodgepodge - essentially driven by opportunism - which had started to lead the country after the quarrel between Oli and Prachanda in 2020. In this coalition, which featured the same parties as the government coalition , there was the Congress Party, a pro-India and pro-US political party, as well as Prachanda's MC (❗️), who were there for opportunistic rather than ideological reasons.

📄 The UML - led by Khadga Prasad Sharma Oli - as the only opposition party.

📊 Elections in Nepal are divided into "Party List" and "Constituency" - the UML had taken 26.95% in the PL and 30.83% in the Constituency, while the Congress 25.71% and 23.19%, and the MC 11.13% and 9.37%.

🏵 In the elections, the UML triumphed in almost all regions, but the C5P - if united - far exceeded the UML, even if there were two seats left to obtain a majority.

🇮🇳|🇺🇸 In any case, it seemed made for a victory of a pro-India and pro-US coalition led by the Congress Party, which was planning to accept a 500 million dollar package from the US, a real "buying of sovereignty" by the US imperialists, who intended to turn Nepal into yet another anti-Chinese and anti-communist puppet.

↩️ Instead, in the previous days, Prachanda - leader of the MC - began to show a disagreement with the C5P, guilty - according to him - of having betrayed the pre-election promises.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/2022/12/26/maoist-leader-prachanda-emerges-nepals-next-prime-minister/

⭐️ Also, Dev Gurung - SG of Maoist Center - started proposing the idea of ​​communist coalition, and so both he and Prachanda started dialogue with Khadga Prasad Sharma Oli 🚩

🇨🇳 Wang Xin - Chinese Ambassador in Nepal - has intensified political meetings with the communist parties of Nepal, with the aim of building unity in order to govern.

🇳🇵 Furthermore, Barsaman Pun - a member of the Maoist Center, and a former guerrilla - quickly returned to Nepal from China, to contribute - as stated by Khabarhub, Nepalese media - to the construction of unity among the communists.

🇳🇵And so, despite the high probability of a new pro-India and pro-USA government, yesterday - December 25th - the alliance between the communists, between the UML and the MC, with Pushpa Kamal Dahal - Prachanda was announced - as the new Prime Minister.

🇳🇵|🇮🇳|🇨🇳 Nepal has always been in a pro-India orbit, therefore such a reversal - the second, moreover, but this time should be more stable - represents a huge geopolitical, as well as ideological, victory for the Party Chinese Communist.

🌸 Subscribe 👉 @collettivoshaoshan

[trouble-in-space]

Hi hon! Can I have a Marvel ship please and an Outsiders ship ( just because am from Tulsa lol)

I'm a 29 year old pansexual cis female. I have a tomboy haircut and really curly black hair . Olive skin with a lot freckles / birthmarks, and green eyes.

I'm covered in tattoos and I have a my nose and lip are pierced. My personal style is a mix between rockabilly and grunge

I'm very short, 4'10" and I'm a size 6 in jeans/dresses I'm petite but I do have some curves. My personality type is ESFJ, Enneagram personality type 6, Virgo Sun and Pisces Moon.

I'm very insecure about my looks/body and my voice. I have a lisp.

I work at a museum as the in Education department, teaching kids about STEM.

I'm Sassy and sarcastic but genuine and sweet really down to earth and love to laugh. I have a dry sence of humor but I absolutely love puns. Hardworking but also a procrastinator. I'm a kid at heart, definitely more crafty then artistic I dont like that I done have much of back bone at times, I try to avoid conflict like it's the plague so I tend to indifferent alot of the time too. I'm a non judgmental person and a good listener but I dont remember things alot of the time so I have planers and sticky notes everywhere.

I love having fun with my friends. Exploring new cafes or little things in our city. I love the look of city lights at night. Not much of an outdoor person endless i unless it is for a concert or I'm walking my dog.

I love any age or genre of rock music, I scare very easily but I love horror movies. I'm really nerdy, I love playing D&D with my friends, reading, anime ect ect.

I collect mugs. I probably have over a 120 at this point. My 15lb pekingese dog is my baby. An odd hoppy of mine is I take only liquor and wine bottles use them as vases for flower bouquets I make. do like to work out but I idea work out is yoga, zumba dance or walking my dog.

HI, thank you sm for submitting love!!

Marvel:

Very much feeling Bucky for you. He would adore you’re tattoos and smaller stature. I also really feel like Virgos are a great pairing for Bucky. He would love your sass and dry humor, and would also adore your down to earth-ness and childish side yk? He would find your job so interesting and admirable (I think your job is so cool!) Would 100% buy you mugs for your collection. Anytime he travels anywhere he’s buying you a mug to represent where he went or just one that reminds him of you. (i also have a mug collection lol)

The Outsiders:

Initially i was getting some Dallas vibes but I think Two-bit really fits you. Like you guys would have a ball goofing around and just hanging out. He would find your tattoos and piercings so badass. You could totally bring out a calmer more put together side of him but you’d both help eachother embrace your childish sides and help eachother with your insecurities. Also Two-bit would totally love and kind of copy your style. (rockabilly two-bit PLS) He’s just such a sweet person and would try to help you be more confident because he can’t stand you being insecure about anything.

I hope you enjoyed these two! I had so much fun writing it lol (pisces + virgo for the win)

[manifestiv]

Hope all your twos are marvelous this year thus far! Note this on your dash for twice something, no promises what tho. We just posted on our updated Events page flyers for, alongside our Haltom Theater* return for Love’s Industrial Massacre ten days from now (2/12), TWO shows in our beloved Dallas that we didn’t play once last year:

2/15 • Charlie’s Star Lounge

4/30 • Amplified Inside**

We hope to see you safely where & whenever you can make it most healthfully. Each show is different in its own right, as we focus this year on collaborations with whomever fits our vibes, no pun intended. In the meantime we continue writing cycles of songs, selecting the creme of the crop, & churning, amassing a collection closer to our chakras than ever. Times file-sharing with eclectic electronic artist lcn.1 have brought the best out of each other. Our results release through the experimental music label GIVE/TAKE who inspire us to go as far as we need to reflect humanity’s future back at it. In the meantime, stay warm, and remember: all our struggles are separate, together, so please retain compassion & empathy.

Stage members: * duo | * trio | ** quad

[patillojack]

I NEED to know if you bought this and where in Dallas Texas because if you didn’t, I NEED it

Lol.. Adoring this… Thrift Shop.. Dallas Texas

[zoom4ads]

Moving Your Goods Versus Selling and Buying

Moving your personal goods, much less your family, can be a daunting thought, but after a careful review of all your options, you will see that it needs not be a difficult ordeal, just one that requires thought and organization. Hopefully, this post will help you arrive at the thought process.

I have done a big move of personal goods only three times, and I was boxed in (no pun intended) by the same thought process each time. I have come to discover that there are many ways to consider the move to Costa Rica, and some may be much cheaper or at the very least less stressful and requiring less coordination.

The first thing I learned about moving goods to Costa Rica is to find your mover in Costa Rica and coordinate the move through him, as you want to be able to deal with someone local from this end, just in case there should be any questions or problems. How logically simple is that? But had I not been advised, I would have called a mover from Dallas, and I think it would have caused more logistical problems in the long run.

Here are some of the mistakes I made. We brought everything, and I do mean everything. We should have had multiple garage sales prior to the move because we downsized from a 3,000 sq. ft. house to a 2,300 sq. ft house, and we had acquired junk from the previous 20+ years. We knew we wanted to build and no longer wanted a dining room, as we discovered it was wasted space in our last home just to store a dining room set. But we certainly brought everything else. George Carlin has a gig on "stuff", and everyone should listen to that before coming to Costa Rica. It took a little over a year for us to actually move into our house, which meant that we paid, by the square meter, to store our goods, which is an expense we had not considered. Had I had the opportunity to do it again, I would have brought our bedroom set, living room furniture, dishes/silverware, and that's it! Yes, special art pieces and personal belongings, but about half what we brought. That would have cut our moving and storage tab in half.

You can buy American appliances here, and yes, at a higher expense, but still less than moving and storing yours from home. Personal goods are not taxed, but goods that are new are subject to taxation. Many times they are not taxed if you have one of each, but if you bring 10 new flat screen TVs, chances are you will be taxed a very large amount. If you want to have no questions about taxation, Barry will develop a flat-rate move that includes your taxation. You needn't worry about this, as his company will handle all the details and dealings with Customs and deliver your goods to his storage facility or your new house.

I would suggest you get a 3-ring binder and keep all the papers related to moving in this notebook. If you pack goods yourself, label the box with the contents of each box and keep a copy of that in your notebook. If you have professional packers, make sure you get a listing of each box's contents, and that the box is labeled with the contents that you have a copy of in your 3-ring binder. All the paperwork related to Customs should be kept here also.

The following are some tips on what you should do before and after you move to Costa Rica:

Two Months before Moving:

1. Gather your moving supplies (boxes, tape, rope, etc.). Begin packing.2. Make any necessary travel arrangements (airline, hotel, and rental car reservations).3. Call a moving company or make truck rental reservations to move your goods.4. Cover your real estate temporary & permanent needs.5. Keep your legal, medical, and insurance records in a safe and accessible place.6. Give your new address to all your mailers (family members, friends, banks, insurance companies, and other financial institutions, charge card and credit card companies, doctors, dentists, and other service providers, state and federal tax authorities, and other government agencies).7. Keep your moving receipts (many moving expenses are tax deductible).

Two Weeks before Moving:

1. Notify gas, electric, water, cable, local telephone, and trash removal services of your move, and sign up for their services at your new address.2. Notify long distance Phone Company of your move.3. Arrange help for your moving-day.4. Confirm your travel reservation.5. If needed, make arrangements to close or transfer your bank account.

Packing Tips:

1. Make sure you have the following supplies and accessories: boxes (all sizes), bubble wrap or other cushioning material, marking pens, tape measure, furniture pads or old blankets, packing tape and scissors, and money and credit cards.2. Label each box with the room in the new home to which it should be moved.3. Make an itemized list of what you're packing with a yard-sale price on each item, so you don't have to pay too many taxes when your household arrives at the Costa Rican customs. Personal household goods are exempt.4. Number the boxes, and keep a list of what is in each box.5. Mark any fragile item.6. Pack your personal items (clothes, toiletries, medicine, maps, food, and drinks) into a bag, and keep it in an easy-to-find place.7. Keep a medical kit accessible.

After Your Move:

1. Locate police, fire, and gas stations as well as hospitals near your home.2. Locate shopping areas in your new neighborhood.3. Find out which day the trash is collected and whether your new community has recycling programs.4. Seek out new service providers (banks, cleaners, doctors, dentists, and veterinarians).5. Provide your new doctor and dentist with your medical history. You may need to request your file from your previous doctor and/or dentist.6. Find out more information about schools, cable service, cultural events, community activities, and the availability of emergency calling services (such as 911) in your new neighborhood.7. Transfer your insurance policies to an agent in your new community. If necessary, make a detailed list of all your belongings, their value, and your coverage.

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[saythankyoumood]

Project Runway Season 18: Meet the Designers (Alan Gonzalez)

Portfolio

Age: 25

City: Houston, TX

Background: Women’s Eveningwear

Items of Note: Alan describes his brand as “a mix of clean lines and pops of color, just enough to draw the right amount of attention to his customer”. I don’t hate this description, but I do hate his brand’s name. Alantude? I like a pun, but I hate it as a brand name. His goal is to “become a household name and to empower women everywhere.” I feel like this is something he chants to himself in the mirror before he has his coffee in the morning.

Sometimes, I feel like the designers’ personal stories are more interesting than their portfolios. Alan was born in Mexico and immigrated to Houston with his family when he was three. His father was deported when Alan was 15, leaving his mother a single parent of two in America. Also, Alan is a youth minister in his free time, which I am sure will somehow come up this season. Can we please have a religious/philosophical debate while the designers are trying to finish a one day challenge? Pretty please?

As far as experience goes, Alan has less industry experience than some of the other designers. He earned his Associate Degree at Houston Community College and has a studio in Houston. He has shown his collections in Austin Fashion Week 2019, Fashion X Houston 2016-2018, Fashion X Dallas, and Fashion HTX.

My Thoughts: I have a feeling Alan will annoy me at some point. I’m basing this purely on his brand’s name, which is the worst, but I think I’m right. As far as his portfolio goes, I’m not really wildly impressed. Of the pictures I included, I’m only really interested in the first dress. I like how the skirt is tiered, and there is something striking in the contrast between the burnt orange and the white. But the patterned dress? Anyone could have made that. The series of blue satin and lace dresses? Objectively terrible. We’ll see if maybe Alan surprises me, but I’m anticipating he’ll be gone within the first four or five eliminations. 

[enbyboiwonder]

CSI Challenge | Day 29: Have you read the books or played the games? If so, which ones, and how did you like them?

Though I bought as many of the Vegas novels (at that point, I hadn’t watched more than about five episodes of Miami and didn’t yet know that I like the show, and I hadn’t watched any of NY at all) that I could find the last time I was at the big Half Price Books down in Dallas, I’ve only read one of them so far: Killing Game by Max Allan Collins.

I chose to read this one first because I knew it included a bit of Greg backstory—exactly as much as I expected, though far less than I’d hoped; I think fic has spoiled me in the character-driven/character-development regard lol.

I love that Collins included the phrase “a stoked Nick Stokes” —it’s the kind of thing that my dad-joke, bad-pun-loving ass would do if I saw the chance. Actually, the whole scene was great:

A stoked Nick Stokes, feeling on top of the case, stopped by the break room for a bottle of water only to find a glum Detective Marty Larkin at a table, staring at his cell phone like it was a particularly baffling piece of evidence.

“This looks like a Zen moment,” Nick said.

Larkin looked up, as if not sure whether to be irritated or just start weeping. “Damn thing doesn’t wanna ring.”

“Heard about the watched pot never boiling?” Nick asked, getting a bottled water out of the fridge. “Same principle holds true for—”

“Could you keep your good mood to yourself?” Larkin asked, only half-kidding.

Nick screwed off the Evian cap. “Get you something? Water? Cyanide? Decaf?”

That got a grim chuckle from the detective. “Any of those will do. When they plant me tomorrow, or the next day, make sure the headstone says, ‘Killed by a slam dunk.’”

“Maybe you guys in North Las Vegas get slam dunks once in a while. Over here in the big town—”

“I think I will have some decaf.”

Although I found the Cath/Warrick mention a little odd and wasn’t fond of it, just like in the literally one episode that the show ever indicated that anything was there. I dunno, maybe there was more and I just missed it because I never saw any chemistry between them, though that doesn’t stop me from going, “Wut,” any time it’s brought up lol.

Overall, it was a good book: read like an episode, if an episode were a PG-13 movie and they’re allowed to say fuck once (well, twice). (A good thing!  If it were a normal-episode-length story, it would be far too short a novel, though I am a little disappointed that it was a new character who got to say fuck. tbh I was kinda hoping for Greg, or maybe Brass.) Maybe not an episode that would make it onto my list of favorites (which, admittedly, all focus on the lab rats...), but far from being one that I’d skip during a rewatch.

I’m excited to get around to reading the others (which, erm, may be a while lmao I am notoriously awful about reading the books I buy, especially when they’re not queer YA), and at the top of my list is Florida Getaway, the first of the Miami novels and an LV/MIA crossover, also by Max Allan Collins, which I got for my birthday. I don’t have any of the games, though I am planning on buying the DS titles at some point—probably after I finish collecting the rest of the seasons on DVD.

[fatcatsarecats]

JayTim Rec List 1/?

In an effort to extricate myself out of the deep, dark, dank cave that is the marvel cinematic universe (or just marvel in general) for more than two minutes, here is a list of jaytim fics that I recently read, enjoyed and or generally love under the read more. 

Please remember to kudos/like/bookmark and tell the author how much you enjoyed their work! 

READ:

dick grayson, snooping? it’s more likely than you’d think by dragonryder94 Words: ~3k | Complete

dick knows that something is up between jason and tim. he just doesn’t know what...not yet at least.

Comment: A Dick armed with memes and trying to have good ol’ brotherly Bonding Moments™ with Tim and Jason is just downright hilarious. A quick laugh and an absolute banger.

In Which Conner is Meddlesome for Tim's Own Good by GeneratorCat Words: ~2.7k | Complete

“Homecoming dance!” it proclaimed. “Saturday, Oct. 24th”. And then, at the bottom some bastard had written, “Do you have your date yet?”

Tim wanted to scream because no, he didn’t have his date yet, and he probably never would. He was too scared to ask them.

Comment: *slams fist on table* you have no idea how much I love high school aus goddamn and this is the cutest!! Do you want awkward teen angst? Kon being chill but also hilarious??? Tim making a fool of himself??? Then this is it. This wins all.

Plus note: Anything by GeneratorCat is great. Puns everywhere, a humour that will hurt your gut laughing, and a writing style that’s tighter than Jason’s abs.

do you wanna feel a little beautiful, baby by Sister Words: ~42k | Complete

"They're watching me," Jason says, when Daisy Mae has left.

"Who, the drag queens?" Tim says. His face is an inch from Jason's chest, and when the strobe lights flash their way he can see a drop of sweat moving down Jason's pecs. His mind feels staticky, bouncing from general outrage to a general desire to put his mouth on Jason's skin. He's too horny to be rational about any of this.

++

Tim goes to a gay club and finds himself embroiled in one of Jason's cases. Glitter is involved. Also crises of morality. Also booty shorts.

Comment: Case fic, baby!!! Listen, I have many weaknesses and they’re usually words starting with C and case fic happens to be one of them. The case was a riot, the secondary cast was a riot, and the jaytim was a blazing hot riot. This fic is lit from beginning to end. Guns, gangsters, glitter and gays everywhere. Really hits the G spot.

this pen was inked with the promise of you by clarityhiding  Words: ~21k (4/5) | WIP

Everyone has a mark-match, someone whose mark will match their own. No matter what, you will always meet your match after your mark comes in and before you die, it's just a fact of life.

Tim's mark starts to come in the summer he turns twelve. Less than a week later, his match is dead. He doesn't meet anyone at all in the time between.

Comment: I usually steer away from a/b/o fics since gender dynamics is not my thing but this is a goodie. I’ve only read the first chapter of this but I already know this is going to be a great time!!! But by great time, I also mean in a dark sense— @themandylion​ really hits the melancholic, listlessness, apathetic vibes of depression in the most wonderful, nuanced way, and when the emotions come, they’re explosive. Plus, the world building is amazing, and this is all in one chapter!

Cats, Bats, Kittens, and Hatchlings by ThePackWantstheD Words: ~72k (18/?) | WIP

In which Selina finds Jason trying to steal Batman's tires and offers to make his sticky fingers a bit stickier, Bruce finds Tim taking pictures of him and thinks that an orphan can take care of an abandoned boy, and the boys learn that life is a lot easier when there's another sidekick around to talk to.

Comment: This fic took my broken heart—my broken, fragmented, crowbar-shaped holed heart—and lovingly stuck cat shaped plasters all over it. This fic was sweeter than a raspberry mocha with one sugar and cream on top. This fic will probably give me diabetes faster than any sugar addiction. This fic is just pure and warm and will shield me through torrential storms. It’s just that good.

Selina and Bruce as great mentor figures and Stray!Jason (not something I see quite often!) with Robin!Tim. Slow Burn.

Day 5: Fake/Pretend Relationship // Royalty AU by  CatChan

Tim stayed deathly silent, hoping that his iciness alone would convey the weight of his disapproval.

No such luck. The old earl kept prattling on about how much more suitable to rule Tim was compared to his older brother because at least Timothy had been adopted from a ducal family and not street performers.

Tim took a deep breath to calm himself, then smiled as sweetly as he could, and told the old fart that he would be sure to relay his message to his father the king.

Earl Duchamp blanched, and started stuttering. Tim didn't give him any sympathy, or wait around for his rushed excuses, instead storming out of the room.

Comment: Historical AU with exposition that’s so fascinating, it doesn’t feel like exposition. That’s a amazing feat alright. It’s just a lot of fun for such a short chapter (Like a fun pilot episode to a historical tv drama) and I don’t want say too much of the interactions because it might spoil the fic. Suffice to say, the world it builds leaves you wanting more so might as well jump in and read the whole collection while you’re at it.

"Mi cama es su cama" by redrobinfection (ChristmasRivers) Words: ~9k | Complete

JayTim Week 2018 - “Bed Sharing” (Day 6)

Tim and Jason aren’t friends. They’re barely allies at this point. But for whatever reason, they keep crashing each other’s apartments, lairs, and safehouses, all in search for a bed to crash in for a bit. It starts out simple - it’s just a safe place to catch a nap, a safe place to recover after an injury, a safe place to hang - but with each visit, it turns into something more - it’s a welcome place to hang, a comfortable place to recuperate, their safe haven in dire times. It might take awhile, but, slowly Jason and Tim turn into something more too. 

Comment: So I read small bits and pieces of this during Jaytim Week, and while I haven’t fully read it cohesively in one sitting (before I fell into the marvel hole *cough cough*), what I do remember it was that it was a very soft and healing fic. If I had to describe the feelings and associated scenes this fic evokes, it’s a cosy, intimate blanket, and a warm body snoring beside you. Comfort packaged in a fic. Tim’s sleepy/sick talk was damn hilarious, and I really liked the gritty details involved with wound cleaning. I thought it was skilfully described.

Mania by Pisces314 Words: ~6k (3/?) | WIP

“I didn’t realize,” Dick’s voice startles Jason, but he doesn’t loosen his grip on Tim. When he looks up, Dick is staring at them with wide eyes. “That you two were...uh.”

It hits Jason then, what the position they’re in might look like from Dick’s point of view. His restraining hold on Tim, and Tim’s now submissive posture, curled up against his chest, probably look to an outsider like a comforting embrace between two people who are much more acquainted than they actually are. His face flushes, but he doesn’t bother to correct Dick’s misunderstanding.

Comment: @glaciya​ is almost always an auto-read for me. The fact that she can flip from cute space, jolly ranch kisses that kills you from sheer amount of fluff and goodness to this is mind blowing.Just from the first chap, it’s already got a great emotional reveal (count me shooketh), descriptions that really immerse you in the terse atmosphere between all the characters and writing that captures a great deal of nuance/overtone of hurt/comfort. It’s wild. 

Dreams From the Sargasso by RivetingFabrications Words: ~46k (17/?) | WIP

Timothy Drake ventured out to solve the mystery behind his parents' deaths, but being taken captive by the most wanted pirate in history hadn't been part of the plan. 

Comment: RivertingFabrications is also another auto read for me, and while I read this a long time ago, I remember that the JayTim interactions were fiery and terse, on the brink of something great, and the camraderie between Jason and the secondary characters was an absolute joy to read. 

Viking AU | The Red Hunter by @drabblemeister​ Link is only to the first instalment

Comment: The only way I can describe the writing is just, lush. Amazing descriptions of the environment which intermingles with Tim’s inner monologue to create a tension that is off-the-charts and an action scene that demands heavy drums and an orchestra. It’s suspenseful, gripping, and engrossing, and this is only the first two drabbles. 

Casebook of Detective Timothy Drake by chibi_nightowl Works: 5 | Words: ~150k | Series in Progress

Comment: The thing about @chibinightowl is that if you asked me to rec one of her works, I’d probably just start listing off her ao3 portfolio. Everything she writes is gold and I will accept it as actual currency if they let me (one day). 

If I had to pick one (a harsh, cruel, gruelling etc. ask for a mortal like me) it would be this series. A series of case fics with never-was-a-vigilante Detective Tim, a fully fleshed out cast of secondary characters (Tim’s partner in particular is a favourite), exciting, intriguing cases that will keep you guessing and friction with Batman that is riveting to read. Gives me Nora Robert’s Eve Dallas Series and Karen Rose vibes. Love love love love love this series. 

TO READ: 

These are fics on which I plan to read, but the premise sounds too good not to be advertised:

If You Don't Grow by GeneratorCat Words: ~28k (8/?) | WIP

“I need to take care of myself. I can take care of myself.”

“You shouldn’t have to, you’re just a kid.” God, does Dick know that. He knows what it feels like to be doing things you shouldn’t have to do at such a young age. About feeling like you have to take care of yourself, be strong and useful.

He knows now it’s bullshit.

(Officer Dick Grayson meets Jason on the street.)

((Alternatively titled: In which Dick pulls a Bruce))

Comment: What more can I say. I’m a sucker for flawed mentor types who try their best!!! 

Build A Dream With Me by Myoneloveismusic Words: ~10k | Complete

Tim fell hard and fast when Batman and Robin first appeared in Gotham. He followed them for years, taking pictures, and watching in awe form the shadows. But after one fateful encounter with the second Robin, Tim found himself falling in a different way. Everything got torn apart when Jason died and Tim forced himself to take on the role of Robin if it meant keeping Bruce sane. But when Jason returns from the dead and makes his reappearance back in Gotham, can the two repair what had been blown apart or will they be separated forever?

Comment: Teen!! Angst!! *throws confetti* but also paired up with @my-one-love-is-music​‘s crafty way to frame fic like a movie scene and this sounds like a fun time.

Astra Inclinant by SociallyAwkwardFox (Maze_Runner_Fae) Words: ~30k | Complete

Every hero has a story. A tale spun by the Muses destined to pass from generation to generation, until the end of time. At the time of their conception, Fate already knows the paths they will walk in their lifetime and how it will end. She knows the stars they will see, the people they will meet, the scars they will bear-like badges of honor etched into their skin. With this knowledge, She designates a few to ensure every hero follows the correct path and completes their duty to the universe. These immortal beings act as a hero’s guide and watch over their lives, until their journey is complete. From one hero to the next they go, dedicating their lives to the universe and Fate’s will.  

Comment: A ‘Hero’s Journey’ narrative never gets old (like BP!) and mix that with Greek Mythology and like a great, angsty jaytim fic. Featuring Seer!Tim and Hero!Jason.

Flying Blind by TheSkyIsALie Words: ~4k | Complete

In the wake of a catastrophic loss, it's the path Jason sets that Tim follows back to safety.

Comment: I mean damn look at the summary already! It’s premise I haven’t seen for jaytim before and the tags have the dangerous combo of Domestic Fluff and Hurt/Comfort aka just looks amazing.

Making Amends by writemydreams Words: ~11.8k (3/12) | WIP

A new drug called Cupid’s Heart arrives in Gotham and Blüdhaven. Highly addictive, it also serves as a potent aphrodisiac. Jason enlists Tim’s assistance in rooting out the drug in Gotham and discovering the source. Along the way, Jason hopes Tim will see he’s changed and that he’ll learn to trust him.

What started out as a simple drug case becomes more complex when Dick discovers Cupid’s Heart comes from a resort for struggling couples. Jason and Tim go undercover as pretend fiancés to find the drug, something difficult for Jason since all he wants is to be in a genuine relationship with Tim.

Comment: A case fic!!! And damn, the tags looks delicious, ‘Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Pining, Fake/Pretend Relationship, and Dick Grayson is a Good Brother.’ It just looks like a really good time.

Turnabout is Fair Play by Skalidra Words: 5.5k | Complete

When Jason gets an invitation to the Continental's latest competition, a simple game, he gladly accepts. It's a bit of fun, an opportunity to win a couple prizes and some recognition. That is, unless one of the other people assigned to his group gets in his way. May the best killer win. 

Comment:  I mean, Skalidra is a guaranteed good time, and she does action scenes better than most published writers. The way she balances detail and action still results in a fast-paced, tense scene so this sounds like a perfect murderific jaunt for a bad day.

At Cosmos' End by RivetingFabrications Words: 11.8k (4/?) | WIP

Tim has quit Starfleet and gone rogue – the system can’t help everyone, despite its best intentions. But when he finds an olden spacecraft in the outermost reaches of space where none should be, he finds more mysteries than answers.

Comment: The tags says you don’t have to be a hard core trekkie to get the gist of what’s going on. It sounds amazing nonetheless.

SPECIAL MENTIONS:

@sociallyawkwardfoxwriter​ and @my-one-love-is-music​ who are both doing Write 365. A crazy feat and not all of the drabbles are JayTim. List of AUs are only from what I recall and there’s more on their blogs!

Write 365 by @sociallyawkwardfoxwriter​

Star Wars AU; Dancer AU; Pacific Rim AU; Tomb Raider AU; Oracle!Tim AU; Werewolf!Jason AU and more.

Write 365 by @my-one-love-is-music​​

Barista!Tim AU; Werewolf!Jason AU; Mermaid!Tim AU; Hunger Games AU and more.

and:

JayTim Week

A place for ongoing JayTim weeks.

Remember to kudos/like/bookmark and tell the author how much you enjoyed their work!

—

Published: 4th June 2018

[mfmagazine]

Violet Behavior

Violet Behavior is an internationally known model and is one of the only fetish models in the world that have also been in major publications which are outside of the alternative world. Published in magazines such as FHM and Hustler and modeling for Trashy Lingerie, Road Bone Clothing, Vanodorm Clothing and Halo Guitars, Violet is now everywhere you look and she says she is just getting started.

Where are you originally from?

The Dirty South! Beaumont, Texas which is pretty much Louisiana.

Do you travel a lot?

Off and on. I will go a few months without traveling and then I will leave once a week. Recently I have been to Dallas, Miami, Ft. Lauderdale, Houston, Denver and will soon be going to New York, Canada and California.

What was in Miami?

Normally I travel for shoots but that weekend I flew from Chicago to Dallas and stayed there for 2 nights to see a band called SKANK. And then I flew to Miami...I wasn't supposed to. I was supposed to fly to Ft. Lauderdale but I am retarded and went to Miami. So a long cab ride later, I was in Ft. Lauderdale and I was there to see my Marley boys.

As in Bob Marley's sons?

Yes sir. It was at Ky-Mani Marley's Birthday party. Damian, Stephen, Ky-Mani, Julian Marley and Khev, The Original Babyface AKA LionKing Muzik, Fyakin, Ky-Enie, and some other people performed also, but it was really just a small invite only party.

Do you see them often? How are they to hang with?

I just saw them here in Chicago too and I am supposed to go to Seattle this weekend to hang out. I will also be seeing them in Cali and Texas over the next month. They are nice people. And I don't mean that to sound as generic as it does. They are actually good hearted, empathetic, spiritual, loving human beings. I'm very thankful I went to Ky-Mani's party because I met a ton of awesome people and top names in the reggae world showed up. It was a lot of fun and I met 2 people that made an impression on me that will last forever. Lionface from LionKing Muzik is an absolute sweetheart. He works with Wayne Wonder and is probably one of the best DJs I have ever seen. I am going to see about booking them in Chicago, they would blow people away here. I also met Sava, who grew up with a couple of the Marley's in Jamaica and still remains good friends with them. I have really grown fond of Sava. He is an amazing person and we have a true connection and I look forward to seeing him many more times, and if I don't for some reason, he will always have a place in my heart.

Finish this phrase:

I love it when a guy: shuts up. Hah kidding. I love it when a guy is funny and also when a guy does surprisingly nice things and has no idea he even did it. And with me saying that just now, I realize that women really ARE complicated ha.

What do men gain by sitting through chick flicks?

A nap I'm sure!

I'm sure you have heard the debates about women being degraded in rap videos these days. What do you, as a female, think about these arguments?  

I really stand behind the right to free speech. Along with having these rights, come other people with different opinions than you, having the same right. Everyone involved in the video is there because they want to be. Those females are not feeling degraded in the making of the video. Now as a viewer, if you don't like what you see... do not watch it! Turn the channel. Raise your sons to respect women and raise your daughters to respect themselves and stop worrying about what is on TV!

What do you wear when you're online talking to people?

I am usually at home when I am doing that. My typical outfit when sitting at home is little short shorts and a wife beater.

How does cyber sex rate compared to real sex?

I wouldn't know... my real sex is amazing, who needs to pretend to have sex online.

What's the creepiest proposition you've had over the web?

I don't know if it is the creepiest but it is recent and definitely creepy. A guy who lives in my city asked if I would come over to his house. Asked if I would sit on the floor and smoke cigarettes while he sat on the bed, dressed as a female. When I was done with the cigarette, to put it out on his foot while telling him "Your feet are disgusting!" Yeah ok. Declined.

Who is your favorite porn star?

I always forget her name... but she is literally the hottest and cutest girl ever. Oh yeah, Jesse Jane!

Would you ever post a homemade porn video on the web?

Um... probably haha.

What is your favorite part of your body?

My eyes actually. "My eyes are the windows to the earth"

When will you retire modeling?

October 2009. Literally. Then it is time for the next phase of my life.

Where do you want to travel to?

A ton of places. I want to go to Belize to see the Mayan ruins. I want to go to Jamaica and experience their culture and go see some awesome music. I want to do some volunteer work in Kenya. I want to go everywhere.

Modeling goals? Personal goals?

As far as modeling, I have no set goals. I have a little over 2 years left of modeling and just want to do the best I can do at it. That doesn't mean get famous or rich off of it, I just want to do it well. When I'm old I want to be able to look back on this as one of the most awesome experiences I have had, know how lucky I was to have accomplished what I did, and the memories of how much fun I had with the people I met along the way that I otherwise wouldn't have ever had the chance to meet.

Personal Goals? Some minor things will change over the years with my personal goals, but most will stay the same for many years, just as they have been my goals for many years already. Whether it is seen and noticed or not, I try to be the best person I can be. I really try to do the right thing on all levels and help people and hope that it rubs off on them and they pass it on. Positivity.

Do you ever get jealous of other models?

Ha, no. When I first got into modeling, it was not intentional. I did not keep up with models nor did I care. Because of this, I had no influence and immediately had my own style, because I had nothing to copy. I keep things that way. I see models in magazines and online and such but I don't pay attention to any of them or what they are doing or wearing or anything. First of all, I don't really care. If they are a friend of mine, I will discuss it with them and hope they succeed at their goals, but I purposely don't talk about it a lot because I don't want it to become a competition with us. Second of all, I am not here to copy anyone. I don't care about the actual modeling industry and I don't want to be a part of the actual social aspect of the modeling.

Is one of your goals to be famous?

Definitely not. The last thing I want is fame, to be honest. This may confuse people because of me being in magazines and that being one of my goals. But it isn't because I want fame, it is because that is an accomplishment in the modeling industry, and I try to succeed in anything I do. I couldn't imagine not being able to just go to the store without people surrounding me. It already sucks to not be able to go to the store without 15 creepy guys hitting on me before I can get back home.

Why do women collect stuffed animals?

Because guys give them to us and we hold sentimental value on EVERYTHING hah.

Would you ever date a guy with a stuffed animal collection?

That is an odd question. Why, do you have one? I wouldn't on purpose, that's for sure. But my luck, I would date a guy and he would end up having this largest stuffed animal collection in the world.

What are some characteristics a guy must have for you to take interest in him?

He has to make me laugh. Almost every guy I have dated is pretty damn funny, except for 1. He made me "chuckle" at best. His jokes were SO bad; I almost became nauseous at times. I do not find puns funny. And he did...about 100 times a day. I remember once my friend Angel was over our house and my dog Quincy was trying to get his tennis ball out from under a heater. This guy says... "You keep doing that Quincy, and you will get opposable thumbs!" and really thought that was hilarious. Angel and I wanted to literally throw up. This sounds really mean but I couldn't take it anymore. I told him finally that I can't be with someone who doesn't make me laugh. So to either be funny, or to just stop trying all together and not say those retarded jokes.

What do you think about people in general?

In general, I think people are extremely complex. I give everyone the benefit of the doubt, but there really are just a lot of terrible people out there. It's quite sad. It is way too common for a person to be selfish, self centered, apathetic, deceiving and fake. I am going to have to use the previously mentioned guy as another example. He was raised by a millionaire of a father and a stuck up mother. Decided he didn't want a real job (he knew he would always have money if he needed it) so he became a "musician". He started dating someone he didn't even really like, cheated on her the whole time, married her and continued cheating throughout. Cheated throughout the divorce, WITH his divorce lawyer, with the girlfriend on the side (who he was also cheating on), cheated with one of his music students, etc. Ended up marrying the girlfriend and having a kid with her, both cheating on each other, tried to kill himself in front of his kid, and didn't give a shit about anything except for music. He gave up on his family, gave up on his son, but makes sure to work hard on his music career everyday of his life. His only goal is fame, nothing else matters. That is just sick to me... nothing comes before your family in my mind. People like him make me cherish the good people in my life even more.

What is your favorite word?

Stupid.

Who would you choose: a guy with a swimmer's body or a guy with a body builder's body?

That question just totally grossed me out.

Do you have a favorite Iron Chef?

I love ALL the Iron Chefs! One of the best shows ever.

What are you favorite TV shows?

Deadliest Catch, Sex and the City, Check Please, Frasier, almost anything on Discovery.

How do you like being romanced?

Romance? What's that?

Every girl wants an honest man. How can you tell if a guy is honest?

Maybe every girl doesn't want an honest man. There are plenty of liars out there that have girlfriends or a wife... or both.

Do you think because of your modeling, that boyfriends are more jealous with you than if you weren't modeling?

Yes, I have noticed it in past relationships. But it isn't always the case. I don't mind some jealousy though. I don't think I could date someone who has no jealousy whatsoever with anything.

What food makes you happy?

Cajun and soul food. That is what I grew up on and it is still my favorite.

Did you grow up in Louisiana?

Basically. I grew up about 10 minutes from Louisiana, 15 minutes from the Gulf of Mexico, and 2 minutes from hell on earth.

Did you visit the beach a lot?

We pretty much lived there. It wasn't something like, if we had an extra dollar or two we would go. It was a necessity; it was included with the bills ha. We would make a few sandwiches, put some gas in the truck, my parents would get some Lone Star beer, and then we were set for a couple of days at the beach. If my dad got any vacation time, we would just stay at the beach cabins.

How was your family life growing up?

Kind of normal, kind of not. We didn't have money or anything if that is what you mean. We moved more than anyone I know. We moved so much that we rented the same house 2 different times and we built the same house 2 different times. That might not sound like too much to military brats or something, but this was all in the same little town in Texas so it's like moving 2 miles away each time. I still really don't know why we did that...

Do you have any regrets about your life in general? Or with modeling?

I am open minded to the opinions of people and never consider myself right about things that cannot be proven and other people wrong... unless it involves morals and being a good person, I know what is right with that. But people say everyone has regrets no matter what...  I don't really feel any though. But if I really had to search for something to regret I would have to tell you it hasn't happened yet. Yeah, I just confused myself also ha. If I was to regret anything in my life, it would be not staying in Texas with my family... and I don't know yet if that is the case. Only time will tell. I am just following my intuition so we will see.

Why are the kind of shoes a guy wears so important to women?

I had no idea that they were important to women. I wasn't included in that decision. And why is it? I don't know... but I do know whatever the reason is, it's retarded. There is no good reason for something like that.

Do men who nickname their penises make better lovers?

That is kind of gross... multiple penises? Hm... now that I think about it... maybe they do...

What subjects interested you in school?

Science for sure. Art also. I had an art scholarship. They took it away from me though.

When you were younger, was it obvious that you were going to get into something like modeling?

Yes and no. No because I was a total tomboy. Yes because I have always been the center of attention in some way, but doing it without being a totally loud, obnoxious jerk. Anyone would be the center of attention if they are being ridiculous.

If there was a movie made about you, who would play the part?

Juliette Lewis fo sho!

Has anything embarrassing ever happened to you during a shoot?

I really don't get embarrassed but something that would normally embarrass someone... hm... I started my period during a nude shoot ha. I dunno, that's all I can think of.

What do you think about the argument that sexually suggestive images promote the objectification of women?

Everyone is going to take things differently. We are not all, men and women, going to agree on a subject like this. This is one of those things like abortion or gay marriage... it should be left up to the person to decide what they want to do, and if someone else doesn't like it, who the fuck cares! If a female writes me and says I am making it easier for men to objectify women, fuck you. If a guy is going to objectify me because of my photos, that same guy would look at me in a parka and sweatpants and want to touch himself. If a guy wants to call me a whore because of it, that same guy would probably call his mother or wife a whore, and I am supposed to care about someone as worthless as that? Same thing with the other 2 topics previously mentioned... if you don't agree with abortion, don't have one. If you don't agree with gay marriage, don't be gay and don't marry a gay person. It is absolutely impossible for us to pass a law on such topics and have it be correct. We need to leave the situation alone and let people make their own decisions that best fit their life and the only law that should be involved is the right to be able to make that decision.

What is your personal opinion on abortion? Gay marriage? Racism?

Abortion... again, there are no exact guidelines we can go by with this. I do not think abortion should be illegal, I do think there should be a time frame of when you can have this procedure. I know that in most cases, unwanted pregnancy is due to lack of responsibility and the child shouldn't suffer because of it. BUT we are human. We fuck up. And then you have to realize that some of these pregnancies are due to sexual abuse in one way or another. Yes, the woman could have the child and give it up for adoption in these cases. They should be able to. But they should also be able to terminate the pregnancy, in a reasonable time frame, if they don't think they can handle the situation.

Gay Marriage and Racism... I am going to answer both of these at once. I cannot believe that we still have issues with this. It's disturbing to me that we are actually telling people they cannot get married because of WHO they want to marry. I have been a supporter and a partner in the Human Rights Campaign basically since it started, so that should sum up my views on that. And the fact that we still have issues with racism is fucking ridiculous and ignorant.

Has being a model ever made it difficult for people to take you seriously?

Being a female in general makes it difficult. You don't have to be a model or even extremely attractive to have to prove yourself everyday.

Does there need to be chemistry between the photographer and model to have a successful shoot?

In a way, yes. Not like a sexual connection or anything like that at all. But there needs to be an easy flow of communication, focused on work but not too serious, etc. I had one photographer hire me in Colorado when I was on a two week tour and he literally sat in a chair to take the photos and didn't say a word. 10 minutes into it, I left. Ridiculous.

What, if any, religion do you follow?

What I follow is not a religion; it is a mindset and a way of living and appreciation of life. Positivity.

What is the first joke that comes to mind?

What has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a cat.

What is your favorite animal? Color? Flower? Smell? Taste? Animal- Panda Bear, Duckbill Platypus, Skunk and Prairie Dog

Color- All greens, baby blue and my favorite color combination is red and white.

Flower- Bleeding Heart, Sunflower, Yellow Rose of Texas!

Smell- A really hot humid day in the summer of Texas when someone has just cut the grass. The beach. The way my dad smells when he comes home from work at the oil refinery. The way my fella smells when he's dirty.

Taste- Lots. Kiwi?

[matskreider-blog]

why are they booing us we’re right?? also i have a feeling jamie absolutely loves doing what conor says and being good for him but conor also loves being good for his boys and doing what they need him to do so hopefully they find some Fun Things they all love (take that wherever you want) while taking direction from conor//if they find/get lucky like the pens did/caps are working with the stars might be fine in all regards and have room to make deals at the deadline for a playoff push idk

that’s my whole mood when it comes to puns, but i’m always outweighed by my friends, so i just roll with the punches

i think they collectively work to figure out the hierarchy, but they also aren’t necessarily looking to have one set way of doing things. like they’re all young enough that they’re just kinda like, “why bother having one person in charge of everything if we can all just share when we need to ??” 

with that said, jamie doesn’t really gravitate towards being in charge, like, at all, because that’s just his personality - and he’s also still very shy after what happened in dallas, so he’s still learning how to feel comfortable enough to take charge. but conor and brian make it easy for him, and brian tends to be a pushover anyway so he’ll do whatever anyone asks

i also just really want jamie to, like, just be a big soft sweetheart. like ben bish levels of soft. like d&d pekka levels of soft. like that’s what i want from him

that would require the stars to have any sort of logic to their decisions but hey, they tried last year, maybe they can keep it going ?? this is also me not at all subtly vagueing the rangers, but they finally got rid of av so maybe they won’t suck this year ?? can we do that ?? can we also appoint a new captain at some point ?? kreids for captain ??

[justniggatrynahelp]

The Gang As Girls (Headcanons)

Ponyboy:

-she’s so adorable omg

-has freckles

-her hair goes to the level of her shoulders

-Soda always makes the most adorable braids of her hair

-likes to craft all sort of stuff

-has flowercrowns she made herself

-she just loves adding stuff to anything

-got plain jeans? give it to her and she’ll make a miracle out of it!

-doesn’t like to show off

-wants to grow longer hair like her sister’s

-small bit jealous of Soda’s hair

-pretty tall for her age

-doesn’t like loud music

-kinda insecure about her freckles

-but everyone loves them and finds them so ultra super couper extra cute

-gets nervous while talking about her crushes

-johnny’s bff

-just the cutest girl you’ll ever meet

-won’t admit but loves The Beatles

-would marry all 4 of them

-no question

-they’re the reason she has bangs

-Two-Bit has all their albums and she’s so jealous

-she has a diary

-her favourite actor is Marlon Brando

-favourite actress is Audrey Hemburn

-there isn’t a movie on this planet that moves her world as “Breakfast at Tiffany’s”

Sodapop:

-has long soft & shiny hair

-big baby eyes

-how does she do it???

-wears a lot of different hair clips

-uses hair spray

-takes good care of her nails

-everyone just loves her

-has a very weird fashion sense

-she can go from pink girly dress to guerrilla pants, denim jackets and big boots

-has a tini tiny crush on Steve

-no one knows it

-besides Ponyboy

-and he’s teasing her about it when they’re alone

-likes taking ponyboy’s stuff

-she still didn’t return that flowercrown she took last month

-Pony’s reminding her 24/7 that she has to give it back

-she acts like she’s keep forgetting to give it back

-she actually gave it to Steve

-so, Pony better say goodbye to your beloved flowercrown

-tried cooking

-failed

-Darry’s been on edge of nerves to learn her to cook

-nope

-still failure

-has a huge poster of Elvis in her room

-would sell her soul for it

-acts like she can wear heels

-no she cannot

Darrel:

-100% wonderwoman.

-she has hair which goes to the middle of her back but most of the time she keeps it in a tall ponytail

-usually wears baggy jeans and wide shirts

-COOKING LEVEL OVER 99999999

-makes the bEST brownies in whole Tulsa

-it’s like a social gathering whenever she makes brownies

-very protective of her sisters

-secretely knows about Pony’s “beatlemania” but won’t tell

-always there to save her sisters from any kind of trouble

-wishes they could do more stuff on their own

-cracks puns on a good day

-cracks pans against somebody’s head on a bad day (jk jk jk 😂)

-loves to get dressed real nice when going somewhere important

-her mother left her pearls and she wears them only on special occasions

-loves wearing bracelets

-for her last birthday Soda & Pony bought her a small box full of different bracelets

-each one for each day

-she was extremely happy with the present

-she wears them everyday, making sure they know how happy they made her with it

-Two-Bit is her bestie

-they didn’t hang out that much in since Darry started working

-she misses those days

-but they still get to hang out sometimes

-also listen to records

-she loves listening to The Who

-has 2 albums under her bed

-would wear bell bottoms 24/7

-makes her legs look longer

-plus comfortable & fashionable

Dallas:

-has boy-short hair

-has a blade in her backpocket

-cheekbones as high as her ego

-porcelain pretty clean face

-if you don’t count few bruises from last week’s fight

-not into girly style of dressing

-rocks leather jacket

-owns a collection of chokers

-has wild hair

-Johnny tried putting hair clips to make it look decent

-nope

-the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree

-sometimes she goes out in a skirt

-rarely but it happens

-the girl got all the whisles

-and she punched every guy who even dared to say something about her look

-her favourite actor is James Dean

-she rewatched “Rebel Without A Cause” too many times

-feels kinda insecure about her teeth

-she tried not to smile too often

-Johnny noticed this and told her she has the prettiest & brightest teeth she ever saw

-since then Dally’s been laughing like crazy

-a huge fan of The Doors

-would kill if it meant she can go to one of their concerts

-has posters of Jim Morrison in her room

-and if you look a bit closer you can also see a few photos of Marilyn Monroe

-she absolutely adores her

-she and Johnny sometimes recreate scenes from “Some Like it Hot”

-of course, Dallas is going as Marilyn Monroe

- “I swear to god, if you tell anyone what we just did, not only I will beat you up, I’ll beat you up for good!”

- “You’ve got my word!“

-professional at doing makeup

-not many people know this since she only wears makeup during night’s out

-Soda is jealous of her skills

-has a small plant which is placed on her room’s window

-loves the plant

-she even caught herself singing to the plant so it’ll grow faster

Steve:

-a bit shorter than Soda

-has curly hair that goes a little above her shoulders

-loVES sweets

-specially anything with chocolate

-she looks tough & masculine

-but still adorable and effortless

-when she was younger she didn’t like her nose

-no one would even think about it but she she stood in front of a mirror, stared at her face and cried

-one time Soda came in and saw her crying in front of a mirror

-Soda walked closer to her and pulled her into a hug

-they sat in Steve’s room for few hours

-Soda didn’t wish to leave until Steve was completely satisfied with her look

-“Why would you even think your nose is ugly? It’s beautiful the way it is, just look at it! Look how beautiful is your whole pretty face!”

-since then, Steve hasn’t let even a tear

-her favourite movie is “Gilda”

-she’s a pro at fixing cars

-and she looks super cute in her working suit

-specially when she wraps a ribbon around her hair

-you wouldn’t even believe what kind of beauties work at DX

-there are times she walks out in a dress

-her favourite dress is dark blue with white dots all over it

-her favourite thing to wear on her head beside her ribbon is a flowercrown soda gave her a month ago

-simply loves wearing everything

-from all makeup, she only uses lipstick

-her car is the coolest car in whole Tulsa

-has her name written on back of it

-she dreams about being Rita Hayworth

Two-Bit:

-goofiest of all the gang

-has straight hair which comes to level of her shoulders

-her hair is most of the time tied in piggytails

-her dream is to go to Disneyland

-she’d take all her friends with her

-has a big jewerlly box she made herself

-she filled it with all kinds of badges

-she has her own collection of badges

-gang only knows about it

-she has all albums by The Beatles

-has no idea Pony is head over heels crazy about them

-she likes to wear denim jackets

-some of them has a mickey mouse drawn on them

-she likes to draw

-she made her own little comic series just like mickey mouse

-she called the comic: “Two & The Bit”

-she had nothing else on her mind so it was more than okay

-used to be very close with Darry

-hopes those days will be back again

-a big fan of color blue

-Paul McCartney is her idol

-John Lennon is her saviour

-the movie she enjoys watching is “Sabrina” with Audrey Hemburn

-she and Pony watched it together

-both fell in love with it

-Steve gave her a lolipop with Mickey Mouse’s face on it

-she stared at it so long

-she didn’t want to eat such a masterpiece

-but still ate it since Dally said he’ll eat it if she won’t

Johnny:

-her hair is little longer than Dally’s

-she has beautiful dark skin

-such a cutie beautie

-big dark eyes

-small nose with few smaller moles on her face

-she wears whatever she finds in her closet

-she and Pony are like the cutest duo in history

-she reads a lot

-her favourite book is “Sherlock Holmes”

-she watched every movie based on the book

-Pony lets her take some of her jewelly

-and Johnny lets Pony some of hers

-SLEEPOVERS

-she’s amazed by Pony’s designs, like the flowercrows she made

-Johnny even tried writing poetry

-she really likes Jimi Hendrix

-she knows the lyrics to all his songs

-she even got Dallas to listen to them with her

-she really admires Dally

-but thinks she should try to not get in so much trouble

-really quiet

-doesn’t like attention

-wishes she could get to go to London

-she loves doing impressions of Sherlock Holmes

[theshoutfactory]

We continue to celebrate the 5-Year Anniversary of Scream Factory by reflecting on select titles we've released over the years: Today's spotlight: THE HALLOWEEN COLLECTION (which we co-partnered with Anchor Bay on. Limited Deluxe Set now out-of-print.) CLIFF MACMILLAN (Blu-ray Producer / Acquisitions): This was the biggest project I had ever worked on. I had to negotiate a deal with 5 companies to get all the rights together. We teamed up with Anchor Bay and then did the sales and we did the packaging and bonus content. In the end, I think we put together a great set. I’m very proud of what we did. A lot of people were involved and we all came together to do right one of the best horror franchises ever. JEFF NELSON (Senior Marketing Director): To say the this collection was a big deal to us would be the ultimate understatement of our brand’s history. I still can’t believe how we pulled this off with Anchor Bay at times. Truth be told, when this was even proposed I thought it might fall apart since we were dealing with several studios to sublicense from. I personally owe my love of horror films to the original HALLOWEEN. It was the first I saw at age 9 on a 1981 NBC Night at the Movies broadcast and I’ll never forget it. It scared me senseless…and when the shock wore off I decided to the test the waters with other thrillers. This one viewing changed my life forever and you can thank the film for partly being responsible for Scream Factory even being an entity. Soon I saw HALLOWEEN II on laserdisc (liked it, but was disappointed that it was not as scary as the first) then came PART III (Laughed it off…now, it’s one of my favorites), PART IV (went bananas when TV spots started airing and saw it opening weekend), PART V (Oh brother), PART VI (Oh brother, sister, the whole family), H2O (The best since II and having Jamie Lee back as Laurie meant the world), RESSURECTED (Sorry, but I refuse this even exists…like a bad Dallas dream season), Zombie’s remake (Not bad, just overly brutal) and his sequel (wish it had stayed in the hospital). Our set went pretty smoothly for the most part. I was very concerned about how our artwork would shape (pun intended) up to be and breathed a big sigh of relief when designer Paul Shipper knocked it out the park and Malek Akkad & Anchor Bay approved. The one element I did insist we have on our creative was the jack-o-lantern from Part 1. It’s the very first thing a Halloween fan ever sees when watching the franchise from the beginning and I personally felt it was iconic enough to showcase. I do also remember Cliff and I making a big deal to AB about including the original’s mono track too—which had altered on the prior 35th Anniversary release. I have watched it every Oct with this track (like so many others) and we couldn’t bear to see our collection not have it. The biggest deal was the extras: Cliff and his producers (Sean Clark, Michael Felsher and others)came through in a big way and the success of the release can be attributed largely to their contributions. Of course, the addition of the different cut from Part VI was a win as well. Beyond proud that we played a part in this franchise's legacy.

[ronansparrishes]

I was tagged to answer all of these questions!!

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

more milk than cereal

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

yes i don’t like to be super warm ever 

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

usually sticky notes that i write things on about the book or like lists of stuff that i have due that week

4: how do you take your coffee/tea?

i take tea with nothing in it and coffee with lots of sugar and cream 

5: are you self-conscious of your smile?

yeah my teeth are a little weird

6: do you keep plants?

yep! i have two cacti, richie and nini

7: do you name your plants?

see above lmao 

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

i’m a writer

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

i literally never stop singing lmao but yeah i do

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

back or stomach

11: what's an inner joke you have with your friends?

“I have to microwave this” anytime anything is awkward 

12: what's your favorite planet?

saturn 

13: what's something that made you smile today?

i had a nice talk with a girl from my history class and this guy from my shakespeare class last semester, like we sat on the benches outside of this building for an hour and a half

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?

plants and paper everywhere lmao 

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

space is... big

16: what's your favorite pasta dish?

alfredo which im eating right now

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

like a reddish color

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

calling the musical oklahoma ‘kansas’ 

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?

i have one but i barely write in it lmao

20: what's your favorite eye color?

i don’t have one

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that's been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

my like briefcase bag thing that i used for like 3+ years and the strap was broken but i kept using it

22: are you a morning person?

yeah i guess, like i get up early every day for class and im usually pretty awake and functioning 

23: what's your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

read fanfiction and watch musicals

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

b, corinne

25: what's the weirdest place you've ever broken into?

i dont think i ever have 

26: what are the shoes you've had for forever and wear with every single outfit?

my black knock off vans from target

27: what's your favorite bubblegum flavor?

anything fruity

28: sunrise or sunset?

sunset

29: what's something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing?

b always leaves me sticky notes and they’re always so cute

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared?

yeah probably

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

i have so many socks and i never wear matching ones and my dad gets mad when i buy more socks

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

idk me and b used to stay up real late with JM and send each other dumb memes

33: what's your fave pastry?

anything with peanut butter

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

violet, she was like a tiny purple weasel thing...

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?

YES I LOVE THEM SO MUCH I COLLECT CUTE STATIONARY 

36: which band's sound would fit your mood right now?

the front bottoms

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?

i clean my room every sunday usually

38: tell us about your pet peeves!

everything my stupid roommate does

39: what color do you wear the most?

black or red

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what's it's story? does it have any meaning to you?

i don’t wear jewelry

41: what's the last book you remember really, really loving?

the raven cycle series!

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

we live right next door to a coffeehouse, it’s not my fave but i spend a lot of time there. it’s student run so it’s kinda shitty lol

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?

probably b

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?

right now, sitting in the kitchen with my friends

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?

yes

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of.

im too lazy, ask ali

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

onions

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

clowns, probably

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

i buy kpop CDs lol u, i gotm lemonade for christmas from my friend

50: what's an odd thing you collect?

socks

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

b - hey thanks by the wonder years

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

the one making fun of student athletes 

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

all of them but pulp fiction, i like rocky horror and heathers a lot

54: who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?

i don’t.... know...

55: what's the most dramatic thing you've ever done to prove a point?

spent 5 days not talking to any of my friends

56: what are some things you find endearing in people?

when they’re funny 

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

i’m not going to but if i did i would dramatically reenact it

58: who's the wine mom and who's the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?

im both. bet

59: what's your favorite myth?

anything greek

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

yeah, i like bukowski

61: what's the stupidest gift you've ever given? the stupidest one you've ever received?

everything i give is dumb, also one time veronica got me a slinky for christmas and i was so mad

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

apple!! 

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

i organize by letter 

64: what color is the sky where you are right now?

black, it’s night

65: is there anyone you haven't seen in a long time who you'd love to hang out with?

corinne or my friend mason

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like?

BLACK

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

like kind of at peace and calm

68: what's winter like where you live?

cold as fuck and lots of snow

69: what are your favorite board games?

clue!!!! idk a bunch 

70: have you ever used a ouija board?

fuck no i dont fuck with that

71: what's your favorite kind of tea?

chamomile 

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it?

no i have a really good memory

73: what are some of your worst habits?

biting my nails, being generally awful 

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

egg

75: tell us about your pets!

i have none :(

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren't?

sleeping lol i have to be up at 5:30

77: pink or yellow lemonade?

yellow lemonade

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

HATECLUB

79: what's one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

make me a mix CD

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

at school and at home they’re both white, but they’re covered in posters of things i like, like monsta x and the x files

81: describe one of your friend's eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

egg

82: are/were you good in school?

yeah i usually get all A’s, school/academics are super important to me and i’ve always been good at them

83: what's some of your favorite album art?

any front bottom’s cover

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

yes! the phrase “a miracle of moving parts” 

85: do you read comics? what are your faves?

nah but i watch daredevil

86: do you like concept albums? which ones?

yeah, lemonade. and so many others

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

ferris bueller’s day off, all the LOTR, les mis

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

dadaism lmao

89: are you close to your parents?

not my mom but i’ve live with my dad since i was 15, he’s like my best friend probably 

90: talk about your one of your favorite cities.

i really love Nuremberg when i was there. it was so nice and beautiful yet still modern?? but there were furries everywhere lmao

91: where do you plan on traveling this year?

around PA and maybe jersey and new york, nowhere major tho

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

so much

93: what's the hairstyle you wear the most?

hair down, pin straight bc that’s how it drys 

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

ummmmmmmmmm idk im bad at this lmao

95: what are your plans for this weekend?

newspaper layout

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

no i like never do

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

INFJ, cancer, gryffindor

98: when's the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

with dallas last spring break probably lmao no i hate hiking 

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

we don’t eat by james vincent mcmorrow or something like that

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

future. forget the past lmao

[angelic-distortion]

PC: Lucy

The first weekend of August is otherwise known as my favorite weekend of the year… LAKE WEEKEND! My family has been going to Lake Ouachita’s Shangri La Resort since my dad was 2 years old. That’s 56 years!!! Not only is it my immediate family (aunts/uncles/cousins), but it also includes my extended family (dad’s aunts/uncles/cousins). We rent out around 12 rooms and it’s always a fun time. So this post will not only include this year’s lake weekend, but my favorite memories from past lake weekends! (And also what I did 2 weekends ago, since I didn’t write a separate blog post…)

Friday, I got to Shangri La at about noon. I saw Aunt Donita, Aunt Clarise, and Jan right as I walked in to get the room key, then I greeted the rest of my family who was there. After a bit of talking, I convinced Lucy to go swimming with me. We spent the rest of the day either in the pool, or hanging out with Madison, Layne, and Landon in the room watching Ghost Adventures. Allie and Taylor finally got there after Lucy and I had just finished taking showers…. so needless to say, we didn’t get back in the pool for volleyball even though we wanted to. That night, Allie and I slept on a very uncomfortable pull-out couch with a bar right on our backs.

Shangri La has the best pie and onion rings (and french fries tbh) in the world. Hands down.

Saturday was filled once again with a lot of swimming. We went down to the point a couple times to skip rocks and take pictures. Madison, Layne, Lucy, Kelli, and I played The Last Word, while Leslyn, Landon, Jan, and Jacob played Spades. At lunch, I had a slice of my favorite flavor of pie, butterscotch. That night, a large group of us got into that small pool and played “keep the ball in the air for as long as you can” with a beach ball. I think the highest we got up to was 42. We played some pool volleyball after that and I hit the ball wrong a couple million times and thought my wrist was just gonna snap backwards. That night, Allie, Lucy, Taylor, Layne, Madison, Kelbie, and Josh sat around and told each other stupid jokes and puns. Then we tried to figure out one of Josh’s riddles. It took us an hour or so, but Taylor finally got it. After we figured it out, Josh left us with one more riddle. After we figured that one out, Kelbie left, and then it was just the 6 of us talking about really weird and disgusting things…

PC: Lucy

Sunday morning, I actually got up in time for breakfast. True to the tradition of lake weekends, it rained. We sat on the sidewalk outside our rooms and watched the rain fall down. It was nice and cool outside. One by one people started leaving for home, and eventually it was just my family, the Herods, and Nantee. We played Pit, one of my favorite games, and Allie won, getting to 500 points first, while I severely lost (with -120 points). After lunch, we finally went home and exhaustion hit.

Now for past lake memories! (Don’t worry if you don’t understand half of these, because they’re really not as funny when you explain them…)

The Game of Snaps

No snuggling penguins in room 11

Call Me Maybe music video

I Love Lucy marathon

ABC Family’s Campus Crush Weekend marathon

Making the purple raft into a slide

The Big Bertha tube

Going under the wave in The Patriot tube

Sooooooo many board games

Collecting shells at the point

Keep away

Allie washing Lucy’s hair in the sink

and many, many more

  Ok, now last weekend, I went to Little Rock to see some of my favorite people perform in one of my favorite musicals, Heathers. It was absolutely wonderful and I laughed soooooooo hard. I spent the night at my friend Dallas’s apartment, and I got to see a lot of my other friends from school, so it was a great weekend!

In a couple weeks, I move in for my senior year at Ouachita! So, that will probably be my next post (if I find the time to write it…. don’t worry, I will)

Fearlessly,

Allison Brooke

Shangri La Memories PC: Lucy The first weekend of August is otherwise known as my favorite weekend of the year...

[discovercreate]

A Shoe for Every Event on Your Wedding Lineup

We all know that every stunning wedding ensemble deserves a fabulous shoe to match, but if you’re stopping at just one pair for your Big Day, you’re missing out on an entire world of wedding shoe bliss. So today we’re teaming up with Stuart Weitzman to help you choose the perfect shoe for every event on your wedding lineup. From beautiful flats to strappy sandals, we’ve got that bridal shower, honeymoon and more totally covered. Scroll for total shoe happiness.

THE BRIDAL SHOWER

It all starts with the bridal shower, which means getting your shoe game on point early. We happen to be head over heels (pun intended) for Stuart Weitzman’s totally chic + casual looks, like The CHAINGANG Sandal and The SUNDRY Wedge. Or keep it sweet with The CHICFLAT or The PEEKABOW Pump, two gorgeous shoes that really make a statement.

THE BACHELORETTE PARTY

Bachelorette parties are for throwing on those party shoes and dancing the night away with your besties. So finding the perfect heels to really make your outfit POP? Priority number one. Enter Stuart Weitzman and an entire world of beautiful possibilities, from the totally stunning PRANKS Sandal to the hot pink NUDIST to the NEARLY NUDE Sandal with its glittery stacked heels. Want to show off your blingy side? The glittery MEMOIR is the perfect choice.

THE REHEARSAL DINNER

We’re true believers that the night before your wedding day deserves just as much style as the BIG event itself.  So our advice? Choose a shoe that will really make your outfit stand out. Think Stuart Weitzman masterpieces like the suede GETONUP Sandal (a fab stiletto), the The NEARLY NUDE in Noir Argento Silver (yes, we love this shoe) and The NUDISTSONG Sandal in glass beige. And, of course, we can’t have this list without The PEEKABOW Pump in Noir Platinum.

THE WEDDING DAY

Ah, the wedding day. This is the moment when you slip on those Stuart Weitzman masterpieces and really, really wow your guests. And with Stuart Weitzman’s new 2017 Bridal Collection premiering on Monday, April 17th (online and in select stores), your fabulous options are basically endless. From our fave NEARLY NUDE (hello, pearls) to The NUDIST, you’ll be looking absolutely divine… we promise.

THE RECEPTION / AFTER PARTY

Long gone are the days of rockin’ the same wedding ensemble for the entire night of your celebration… now we mix things up with a glamorous change for the reception and after party. Which means another amazing pair of shoes from Stuart Weitzman to make you feel all sorts of sophisticated. Think seriously chic + comfy options (a girl’s gotta dance) like The BALLSOFFIRE Sandal, The DECOR Sneaker and The DECOR Slide in suede. Or go for The SIMPLE Sandal with a stacked heel that’s perfect for taking that dance floor by storm.

THE HONEYMOON

When all of the official celebrations are over, it’s time to kick back and relax with your newly betrothed. But just because you’re not in “official” wedding mode doesn’t mean the style has to end. With Stuart Weitzman, you can rock that honeymoon with chic looks like The CORBATA Sandal (hello, jean blue suede), The EDGEWAY Sandal and the colorful JABOW.  And don’t forget the flowery FRAYED for those nights out on the town.

With locations on Michigan Avenue (Chicago), Madison Avenue (New York), Greenwich Avenue (Connecticut), Rodeo Drive and South Coast Plaza (California), NorthPark Center (Dallas), and Lenox Square (Atlanta) and a website that will make you swoon (seriously), Stuart Weitzman’s elegant designs + fabrics will have you walking down the aisle in total style. Not to mention that they’ll personalize all bridal styles with your name and wedding date on the sole of the heel. Check out their gorgeous new Spring 2017 Bridal Collection and then peruse all of their other options for every party on your itinerary. You’re going to look fabulous, you guys.

Photography (Bachelorette Party): Ava Moore Photography | Photography (Bridal Shower): Ashley McCormick Photography | Photography (Honeymoon): Marta Locklear | Photography (Reception): Emilie Ann Photography | Photography (Rehearsal Dinner): Jose Villa Photography | Photography (Wedding): Jose Villa Photography

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