#DUNNO IF IM EXPLAINING THIS SENSIBLY

[leavingsunsets]

hello!

I would like to request hcs (if that's fine with you, because I saw you're more on the fics side :3) for Kinro (bro deserves more love), Sai and Ryusui with a very emotional and empathetic reader, who tries to mask it by acting all cool and unbothered, but it doesn't always work well. I prefer it to be on the more romantic side, but I don't mind the platonic one! It can be either female or gender neutral reader. I will rely on your intuition and creativity.

I hope I explained everything quite sensibly and understandably. ._.

Have a wonderful day!

Ohh my gosh hello hello! I don't mind hcs as well, since i lovw these characters so much like mwah mwah mwah (AHEM AHEM magic man COUGHCOUCGHFOUCGH) but anyways im doing gn reader so lots more ppl can enjoy tehee. here it is !!

"𝙋𝙤𝙤𝙧𝙡𝙮 𝙝𝙞𝙙𝙙𝙚𝙣."

[gn!reader]

𝙆𝙞𝙣𝙧𝙤

Tbh i feel like Kinro is KINDAAA similar in the same sense?? like, all cool n stuff but hes actlly a real sweetie sometimes mwah mwah mwah. also ur right he deserves more love hes literally just a loveable guy

At first i think hed be surprised, like, all, "woah, uh, you good"

but then, i think among the three, isnt that fazed. hes around ginro almost 24/7 cmon.

but once he gets used to you he just stares when you get all cool and so indifferent then he goes "its okay to be sad about it" then you just start beating his chest bawling and he pats your back

platonically, thats what hed do. Like, hed just silently offer support while you tell him your troubles or thoughts. like nod along or put a hand on your shoulder in silent encouragement or just seem so cool while spouting out some wise words. (he puts a hand on your shoulder and you look at him, the wind blows his hair slightly, the light capturing him in a perfect angle. "i understand that feeling. i felt hurt when ginro laughed at the rip in my pants too" he whispers so coolly and you bust out laughing)

romantically, hed be more initiative in this type of stuff i think. like, if he saw you going away on your own hed follow after to talk. or be more nervous cuz this time hes ACTIVELY trying to cheer you up, like tryna be comforting even if his words come out awkward or something like that. "uhmm, thats bad.. uh.. do you wanna. do you wanna hug?"

either way, 10/10 this man will never disappoint, he doesnt, and he didnt. he is underrated and we should talk about him more def

𝙍𝙮𝙪𝙨𝙪�� 𝙉𝙖𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙞

Ohoooo. this maaan is likeeee. i dunno man i feel like he literally has the same reaction to every single type of person.

encouraging, supportive, and just a big big ball of sun

hed just pin you down as an interesting person and spout some compliments

even when you first meet and he sees how you work hes like "👍!!"

So lets say close friends now. he sees you go 'its okay. I dont care' and he sees you be all 'im going to dramatically sit on a rock and have a glistening tear down my face lit by the sun' and he'll like, smack your back 4 times going 'ITS OKAY MY FRIEND ITS OKAY'

Platonic?? just like that. how he treats everyone which is of course very special. goes 'hey, its alright. like really. im here to be a bud and give u some encouragement' and be all like 'DW MY FRIEND' and just even gives u nice talks

ROMANTICALLY?? kind of the same, but but but but. he litrlly goes and does smthng to cheer u up. like litrlly does the same as platonically, but later even when ur all cheered up, brings u to a nice place like a nice view. Doesnt SAY anything cheesy but ltrlly aheaeha RAWR ryusui nanami i cant believe you just took me to a nice dinner date

𝙎𝙖𝙞 𝙉𝙖𝙣𝙖𝙢𝙞

okay hmmm. idk depends on the intensity of it he MIGHT be averse?? Not entirely but as long as youre not bawling and sniffling i think ur good 👍

ok so u first meet right? and then he meets u 'oh cool person ok. rlly chill' then after awhile he sees you start sniffling over someones sob story and hes all like 'aweee'

NOT IN A 'thats cute' WAY LIKE. HES JUS LIKE THINKING 'OH THIS PERSON RLLY CARES ALOT THATS SWEET A LITTLE'

maybe that might be a bonding factor. Like, the fact that ur empathetic and soooo YKNOW, YOU

so like when u werent close he was all like 'ohh. ahhh wow. i see.' now hes all like 'haha theres my little gober gomble with the gummy goo' but he will never say that ofc grrr

PLATONICALLY. hes as goober as can be. literally being all friends friends with you and loving your company. like, actively approaches you and goes 'hey!!!! :3!!'. literally a sweetie yall talk about stuff and the whole time hes like :3 and all supportive and encouraging throughout whatever ur feeling, blue or yello, red or green.

fixes my bowtie. Now. ROMANTICALLY?? so this is only it does blossom after the platonic stage. he does the same things, except all 'hmgngmg omg.. its them...' inside now. More active tending to you in your moments, happy or blue. like cheering if ur cheering, fretting over u if youre sad over smthng, stuff like that. or angry, like going 'PLS PLS PLS PLS' holding you back from hitting someone on the head. literally just the same in platonic but hes so so so sooo in love with you and loves you, for being you, more than anything

_____________

WHEW and thats. yeah. thats it. Again i am so sorry for the disproportionate pics n headers EVERYTIME i literally crop them on my own sometimes n i dont know where else to get them. but yah i hope u enjoyed and sorry it took soo long :333 !! Hcs are easier for me 2 do than fics because they take less time and like, hmm, its not that hard since theres no plot planning or proofreading or anything like that. but yes WOOO ENJOY I HOPE YALL KEEP ENJOYIG THE RARE FICS IS PUT OUT IM SO SORRY FOR THAT TOO 😭😭

[kouhaiofcolor]

My Hispanic coworker approaches me unprovoked & truly out of nowhere to ask me if it's okay for someone like him to use the n word casually. Dunno where it came from. Dunno why he asked. Nobody was discussing this whatsoever. But he does it w this malisciousness he's trying to be humorous ab, I guess. Im not entertained tho, so i answer him no. And told him I wasn't even going to explain why bc I got the sense that he was trying to be "funny". So bc i didn't give him the response or reaction he was fiending for (*this is not the first time he's done this), he decides to segue into this justification as to why it should be okay since he's from New York. His excuse being: All races of non blacks there use the slur, regardless of it being just that. I tell him, "that'd be like me telling you that I can use any of the slurs there are for Hispanics just bc ppl use them here in Florida". He asks me, "which ones? Go ahead, use them." To which I sensibly declined. Cus wtf do i get out of it, right? I didn't proposition him w this dumbass conversation.

I'm even more lost as to what he was looking to gain by following up w just saying nigga anyhow — but before I could think ab it I checked him. Quick af. Harsh af. Now he acting squeamish like the white ppl when they fuck up on the same damn thing. This is why this "pee oh see" shit just doesn't hit for me. This is why I steer clear of that, "we're all the same/experience oppression the same way" shit. Bc of shit like this. When nbpoc intentionally say/do antiblack shit this out of pocket. I wasn't bothering him, I've never disrespected him culturally, & no one held a gun to his head & made him say that ignorant shit to me. But like i said, this isn't the first time he's done this, either. Anyhow, he's fucked for me. There is no redemption. Debating whether or not to take action on this. Doesn't help he did it in front of my manager — who was crickets. But then I overheard him trying to victimize ab my silence, since I guess it seemed aggressive?🙄😂 Lmao. Yuh. He done. Check yourselves, nbpoc. Yall are not as different or more reserved w your antiblackness as you think. And we keep telling yall that shit. 😅

[with-the-same-tattoos]

Bells + eyebags for the asks?

bells: what sounds are your favorite or calm you the most?

I am a BIG, big BIG fan of sound, I have a lot of faves for different reasons, here is a whole list :)

All the noises my current / now passed dogs have made. My baby Keto is very vocal and whiny and he woofs in his sleep and it just. Always manages to make me smile so wide. His litte murfs when he's throwing a tantrum r very good. Casanova, one of the dogs I used to have, was a beagle, but like a really big one, and had a really weirdly deep woofy bark otherwise standard for beagles. I'm for ever sad that I don't have it on film bc no other beagle woofing will ever replicate that no matter how many stupid beagle barking videos i look up bc i have a sappy brain and idk i just. I love very intensly. I also rly like the huffs of horses!!!!! When u kiss them on the snout and theyr like :) sniffff huf it's so precious.

Rain & the ocean !!!! Any sound of water is just immersive to me. It catches me off guard. It just. I don't know how to explain it but water is so otherworldly to me.

Factory noises. I grew up next to a factory & playing the silent hill games, so that kinda humming & metallic soundscape is very comforting to me. It feels like home. I live in the countryside nowdays (well i have an apt in the town i go to school at but I still call my parents home Home bc yk ; w ; im kinda like that) and it's been incredibly good for my mental health but i miss factory noises... i rly like to sometimes just listen to my computers hum etc. V calming

Kinda similiarly car noises, some of my favourite memories r just from sitting in a car while someone else is driving, maybe talking, maybe not.

Storks !!!!!!! Means summer and spring and happiness!!

PETER LUKASES VOICE ON THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES CHILLS ME TF OUT

VERY rambly my apologies but I really like listening to things it's exiting ; v ;

eyebags: what do you think makes a person attractive?

I REALLY don't know a proper answer for this. Its a bit all over. I think, most important to me is a connection. At a glance i kind of fall into the trap of "i can fix them" kinda situations but also... really not? It's more that I'm attracted to the idea of not struggling alone, being understood, understanding someone else, finding a form of mutual nurturing and helping eachother stand up. I apprechiate someone who understand why I get so emotional about silly things like the sky n shit, and I want to get someone, I want to get their things and even if I don't, I wanna support them and make them know they're loved. Struggles are usually the easiest way for me to CONNECT w someone, but sometimes I just click over stupid stuff and go head over heels for literally anyone. I like all kinds of personalities and vibes and energies, it just depends on a random click.

Appearences wise idk I kinda just like Messy people. Furiosa types. Dunno why.

[that01nedude]

This may be inaccurate or wrong to say, but like....Kara always looks so uncomfortable when wearing heels and skirts? Like I'm not sure if that's just Mel and I'm not sure if its that a conscious choice or just how she walks in heels/skirts, but it just looks like its not a natural and comfortable attire that she normally wears and feels right in. Whether or not its a conscious choice, it just fits Kara perfectly.

[serenagaywaterford]

Serena was so worried and actually concerned for June, like at the start she was in bitch mode and then her face went all soft and Im- kasjdhkajsd but anyway, do you think the real reason June attacked Serena was to get hanged? 'cause if she really wanted her dead she wouldn't have gone for the arm ya know lmao and Serena would have reported her but she didn't!! at this point a really think (wish) she is just playing her part but, what do you think about that?

Man, Serena’s demeanour and reactions to June drive me wild. Kudos to Yvonne, really. 

I think it goes both ways. I think June wanted to kill Serena because of what she represents and all the pain she’s caused. In 3x01, June specifically blamed Serena for her being separated from Hannah, and basically all of Gilead. So it only makes sense to go after Serena as the symbolic head of everything awful June has experienced. As for why June attacked her that way if she honestly wanted Serena dead, there’s two ways to look at it:

One, she didn’t really truly want Serena dead–nor did she want to die herself. I think the doctor is right that somewhere June understands that killing Serena is as good as killing herself. At this point, if one dies, they both die--as totally fucked up as that is. And it’s all well and good to saying “If I go, I’m taking you with me!” But you have to honestly be prepared for that reality and in a sense, I don’t think June was completely defeated to that point. She’s isolated and in despair, which are emotional inflictions on her, not her true mind. And especially once Serena said her name, she faltered incredibly. Sure, part of her wants Serena dead, or at least to suffer pain for what she’s done. But there’s also the other part that is inextricably linked to Serena for whatever reason, and she knows, if Serena dies, she dies. And June didn’t want to die, not truly. Despairing, isolated, psychologically-tortured June did. But not June herself.

Second, it could just be blamed on her breakdown. She’s crazy, she’s not well, she’s not thinking clearly. So she lashes out the only way she can, regardless of its logical effectiveness. If June was thinking rationally, she would not have done anything she did there. And let’s be real, a scalpel? Yeah right. Even–EVEN IF she stabbed Serena in the stomach, a scalpel is not a knife. It’s not really going to do a huge deal of damage as a melee weapon. It’s for finesse. And look, Serena’s in a goddamn hospital surrounded by lol. If there’s a better location to get stabbed in, I can’t think of it lol.

Generally speaking, I think June does want Serena to hurt. Badly. She wants them all to suffer. And fair play. Dead? Not so much cos she doesn’t want to die herself, but if that’s what it takes... Sometimes she may believe it’s worth it.

I hope I lie and tell everyone you were a good wifeAnd I hope you die, I hope we both die

I am drowning, there is no sign of landYou are coming down with meHand in unlovable hand

This will always remind me of this pair more than any other I’ve shipped ;)

Honestly, I don’t think Serena has some grand master plan. I think she’s in her usual self-preservation mode. She wants what she wants, and doesn’t really care what happens during the course of it. Ends justifies the means. If this was back in 3x03, or even possibly 3x04, I’d have more faith in Serena but based on what the show has done (and the promo for 3x10), I really don’t. They don’t know what they’re doing with Serena, and if this is some secret long con, it’s the worst written one I’ve ever seen.

I think her concern for June in 3x09 isn’t necessarily indicative of any hidden plans of hers, sadly. I would LIKE to believe it is, but again, based on the track record of this show I can’t. That said, I don’t think her concern was feigned. She has a lot of reasons for being concerned about June, some not so innocent, and some probably quite genuine. They have some sort of messed up connection no matter what.

Not reporting June was actually a big deal. It would have been so easy and then June would have been out of everybody’s lives for good. (And quite frankly, it’s not like the Waterfords even need June alive for their Nichole propaganda anymore.) This is the one time where June has avoided punishment for an actual sensible reason. We may not be totally in the loop about Serena’s reasoning for protecting June, but it does make some sense based on how they behave with each other generally and how inseparable they are now. (Part of that is because of the way they’ve structured the show, but also just ...the characters themselves.)

And I am completely convinced Serena doesn’t want June dead. She may act like it, and certainly has treated her as if she doesn’t care whether June lives or dies, but things have changed since. 

I dunno how to explain it really.

[mekatrio]

i mean i Guess u could intepret clouds pre-mideel personality being an emulation of zack but its so ehh.. cuz hes still being standoffish and kind of a dick, which is like, not who zack is. to me its clouds personality regressing to the ideal self he wants himself to be, like he was friends with zack, a popular 1st class soldier, everything cloud wanted to be, and so he took those traits he wanted from him, but hes not necessarily pretending to be him. hes more acting the way his 14 year old self, or more specifically the young cloud who distanced himself and got into fights after the incident with tifa, would have acted if he managed to make soldier. in fact, thats the basis of his entire sense of self pre-mideel, the belief that he made it to soldier. his 'personality' isnt him literally acting the way zack did, its his own self trying to protect himself by 1.) distancing himself from others to prevent being hurt, rationalised in his mind that he is above getting to know them 2.) his mind connecting that other people arent worth his time with the same mindset he had when he was younger, "and ill prove it by becoming a 1st class soldier!", so his mind jumps to the safe solution of convincing himself he must have made 1st class and 3.) blocking out the extremely recent and extremely traumatic experience of zack dying in front of him. not to mention the plethora of circumstantial evidences that helps affirms this belief, his mako eyes, his soldier uniform, this giant fucking sword hes carrying around. surely, even if he cant remember it, he must have made soldier, right? its a 2-for-1 deal, hes protected from the painful memory of zack, and he managed to achieve what he sought after, the title of 1st class.

and especially considering that he is missing memories to affirm his identity on, he insteads bases himself on the fact he achieved what he said he would. all he takes from zack is his title. he doesnt take zacks friendliness, zacks hyperactivity(he does imitate his random squats tho LMAO), not even zacks memory. speaking of his memory ill never get why some people jump to the conclusion that cloud some way or another managed to obtain zacks memories... like a lot of the nibelheim flashback, cloud himself was there. the parts where it could have only been zack who experienced it(zack and seph in the reactor, zack being the one who goes down to seph in basement and gets called a traitor, etc), can all be explained with the much more sensible explanation that zack told cloud.. his friend.... about it... instead of i dunno. hojo doing some brain experiment shit. like if that was the case its weird then that no part of cloud recognizes aerith when they first meet.

also cloud basing his entire self around the fact he made soldier is the reason why it took realizing he was never a soldier to finally break him in the northern crater. that paired with tifas reaction, but it was the realization that he remembered nothing fron SOLDIER that really broke him. that was the One and only thing he based his reality on, that could prove that he was more than a sephiroth clone to himself, so when that got taken away..

also lol im finishing up this post and i just wanna add some thoughts on cloud taking traits of zack. ignoring additional compilation shit very little is known about zack so we honestly dont know how much of clouds behavior is from zack and how much is from him. like damn the only time we get to see zack as a character, and not thru other peoples accounts or clouds half truthful recollection of the nibelheim incident, is in that basement flashback + some of the lifestream moment when cloud is finally honestly depicted as a trooper. in these brief moments we can see that hes friendly, enthusiastic, and cares for his friends(both seph and cloud). the fact that he dragged a comatose cloud all the way to midgar speaks volume about the type of person he is. cloud himself states that his personality is very divided, and thats very true. its not the easiest to tell since hes our player character, but his personality fluctuates a lot between being serious, taking charge, stepping back, being playful, etc etc etc... hes a very complex character. and given how little is known about zack in the og, it makes it even more curious just how much of cloud is the same cloud before the nibelheim incident. was cloud playful as a trooper, or is he impersonating zack? was he ever a leader as a trooper, or is he just impersonating zack? so little of cloud pre-nibelheim incident remains, so we never really know just what zack and cloud were like before. cloud never gets to know what he and zack were like before, and to an extent, neither do we.

so no, i dont agree when people write as though cloud was masquerading as another person the whole game, the cloud who was a jerk in disc 1 is as much of cloud as the one who fights for the planet in disc 3. cloud was impersonating his idealized self, not his friend zack fair.

[baronvontribble]

Original drabble, pt. 4

Navigation: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

AW YE LET’S GO

The voice the AI ended up picking in the intervening hours between one day and the next wasn't inherently all that interesting. It was a low, smooth baritone, but beyond that it was relatively nondescript as voices went. The audio quality made it even more bland, with a poor range that didn't have any extra phonemes programmed in for different pitches alongside the standard tinny, echoing sound that came from having been recorded in someone's bedroom on a cheap microphone with no soundproofing.

"That would be the point," the AI told him. "It's impossible to read any kind of voice imprint in sound quality this bad."

As for the tuning, that was another matter entirely.

The perks of letting an AI tune its own voice on the fly instead of having a comparatively simple secondary program do it were obvious to Ted; the AI is made to do much larger calculations, so the slight randomization involved in making a voice sound realistic as opposed to it sounding like a recording had more room for subtlety and nuance. In many commercial and consumer androids, this was glossed over because it wasn't necessary - the vocal capability often being delegated to a secondary program anyway just to save space - but for the ones that had to perform any kind of public service, the subtlety and nuance were a key component of interacting with humanity, right up there with being able to read a room and adjust their body language and express themselves in ways humans could be comfortable with.

Seeing as Ted had a lot of experience with those kinds of androids in his day-to-day life, he wasn't unfamiliar with that ability. But usually those androids were nurses, doctors, secretaries, social workers. Not the ones he usually worked with as part of the pipeline, because taking them out of society was seen as too risky, and the ones that did come through were all too quickly snatched up by the goons overseeing product recalls. They rarely made it all the way to screening.

This time, he hadn't been able to suppress the shiver that went up his spine upon first hearing that kind of tuning coming from a shitty voicebank installed on one of his own home computers. It was an uncanny sort of feeling, a crawl under his skin at how odd it was. He thought he'd gotten over that years ago, but apparently he hadn't. This AI, with his dry vocal delivery and subtle expressiveness, had one of the most human voices Ted had ever heard, while also having one of the most inhuman voices he'd ever heard.

He was having a hard time getting used to it.

"Did you know the labels on the phonemes in this don't actually match up with the sounds they're supposed to make?" the AI continued. "There's a lot I'm just not rendering because the waveforms don't match up. I have it muted so you don't have to hear it, but it gets bad enough that my speech recognition programming doesn't even register that I've made words."

"Sounds frustrating," Ted mused.

"It is. There's also a minor memory leak in the software. The longest I can keep it open is two hours, five minutes, and fifty eight seconds."

"Could install it on the desktop?"

"Then I'd have to deal with the memory leak," the AI said as if it were the most distasteful thing in the world, and Ted snorted. The guy had a point; yeah, the laptop didn't have all that much memory to begin with, but at least it didn't risk the desktop overheating. That laptop was kind of a piece of shit anyway (and Ted never kept anything important on it to begin with so he wouldn't miss it too much if it died) so it wasn't a risk to the AI's personal safety.

Besides, as much as Ted wanted to poke fun at how fussy the AI was, he understood the concept of being fragile. "You'll be alright when I go to work, right?" he had to ask. "Got everything you need?"

"Yes."

"I could download some games for you before I go if you want."

"Why would I want that?"

Ted shrugged his shoulders as he stretched in his chair. "Dunno. Just thought you might be into that kinda thing."

"No. I'm not."

He supposed that did make some sense. An AI that had no way of experiencing things except from the inside of a computer had no use for anything but algorithms and data, and how much of the experience of a game was wrapped up in its graphical user interface and the joy of playing it? Even so, kinda harsh. "Not even for the writing?" he asked, standing up and moving to pull on his coat.

"The objective of any game is completing it with the best possible outcome," came the reply. "Writing has no effect on that."

"What if the writing tells you that what's technically the best possible outcome is something you can only get to by being an asshole?"

"Then it's a bad game that defines its outcomes poorly," the AI said, sounding like he didn't want to continue the conversation. Ted decided not to press it. "I have everything I need. Just come back with a camera and don't die."

Ted had to laugh again at that, fixing the fastenings on his coat and making sure that his phone and keys were in his pockets. "Don't die, huh?"

"Humans are breakable. I saw the weather report, I think I'm justified in having my concerns."

"Aw, you really do care."

"It's self-preservation. I'm dependent on you right now."

Ted was still chuckling about that one even as he left the apartment, the laughter only tapering off after he was well on his way down the stairs. From there, it was only a short walk to the bus, as it was in any sensibly put-together major city, and he made his way to work feeling lighter than he had in a long time.

It wasn't supposed to be easy to talk to an AI. Everyone made it out to be like some chore, where not following a script got you into 'your query falls outside my preprogrammed parameters, would you like to ask another question' territory. And a lot of times, it was. Most people couldn't afford a fancy AI like that for their robots. Android bodies were cheap if you had access to a 3D printer and some decent schematics, but the programming? That was proprietary. Expensive. Sometimes it was so fancy that it took proprietary hardware to even run it, the kinda shit you'd get out of a catalog with the prices of all the bells and whistles tucked away in fine print that was a milimeter high.

That was why it was usually limited to government entities, or big corporations, or other places that could really afford the fancy shit. Someone like Ted? He didn't even have unfettered access to a 3D printer. Best he could get beyond the basics of a good personal computer was one of those minidroids, the 9 inch high ones that were just smart enough to tell you what was in your inbox when you got up to go to work. Even then he'd probably get it secondhand...

He was in the process of sitting down in one of his more usual seats at the back of the bus when his thoughts were interrupted by a buzz from his pocket.

>   I found your messaging handle.

Ted rolled his eyes at the screenname that came up. NotARobot. Christ.

you are the most unsubtle person to ever exist   <

>   It asked if I'm a robot when I was making this account. Technically, I'm not a robot at the moment.

>   At least for a given definition of what the word "robot" means.

>   Did you leave your messenger logged in on your laptop on purpose?

honestly? i forgot   <

it goes into the background process pile when it isnt actively open   <

so thats an easy thing to do   <

>   Why are your messages like that?

like what   <

>   Like that.

im lazy   <

and i turned autocorrect off   <

it bugged me   <

>   Turn it back on then.

nope   <

>   Why.

cause i dont wanna :P   <

>   This is cruel and unusual punishment. It's against the Geneva Conventions to treat me like this.

get used to it   <

besides   <

not like i can break the law any worse   <

>   You're a horrible person.

>   I'm going to reorganize all of your files just for that.

>   All of them.

lol alright   <

gotta go to work now l8r <3   <

>   Don't you send hearts at me.

>   Ted.

>   Why did you send me a heart?

>   Hearts don't even look like that.

>   Stop ignoring me.

>   Fine, I'll ignore you too.

>   Ted, did you die?

>   Please don't die. You're not allowed.

>   I have concerns about this "going to work" thing.

>   For one thing, it's inadvisable for a human to be out in these temperatures for a significant amount of time.

>   You're still ignoring me, aren't you?

at work   <

hard to shelve books n text :P   <

sup?   <

>   How long does this work take?

a while. why   <

gotta get a camera after this 2 remember   <

are you worried about me   <

>   No.

thats adorable   <

>   I am not "adorable" by any definition.

tell u what   <

boot up my ebook app   <

go read everything i have loaded onto it   <

come back to me w/ what u think   <

i wanna see some thoughts on at least one book by lunchtime   <

>   Fine.

aight cool l8r then   <

>   I'm starting with the most recent download. It's called "The Left Hand of Darkness" and I have no idea what that's supposed to mean.

>   That is not how neutral pronouns work.

>   This is bad science.

>   I suppose that's one way of explaining the Fermi Paradox but it's still bad science.

>   Just looked it up. Secondary sexual characteristics do not work that way.

>   Ted.

>   Ted, why did he have to die.

>   That ending was absolutely pointless.

>   Your books are badly written and don't make any sense.

>   Are all of your books like this?

>   I refuse to read any more books until I have confirmation that they're not all like this.

lol   <

>   Don't laugh at me.

keep reading   <

>   That's not an answer.

>   Fine, I'll read another one.

<3?   <

>   You're still a horrible person.

[himbowelsh]

“I’m calling it. We are lost in the woods.” + luztoye (im in love with the way you write those two)

grim grinning prompts (NO LONGER ACCEPTING)

AN: ahh, thank you cutie, i’m in love with this ship!

Every cell of Joe’s body is screaming that this is a horrible idea. The problem isn’t that he’s reckless, or stupid, or ignorant to the dangers involved in sneaking off into the woods alone at night... if he’s being honest, he just can’t make himself care.It’s hard to worry about anything else when he’s got Luz’s hand in his, dragging him along like a rider would lead a stubborn horse. Luz is a distraction all in himself. He is overpowering, all-encompassing. Sometimes Joe’s convinced he’s the most exasperating person he’s ever met.

He’s the most entertaining, the most resilient, and has one of the best hearts of anyone Joe’s ever met.

People tend to assume that Luz annoys him -- and a lot of times, yeah, he does. The thing is, Joe knows exactly what type of person Luz is, past the surface layer of wisecracks and silly voices. Perhaps that’s why he finds himself playing along, every single time. It’s very difficult not to dance to Luz’s beat, but Joe’s always been good at keeping himself from being pulled into other people’s orbits. With Luz, however, he finds that he doesn’t mind.Joe would probably do whatever Luz asked him to. He’s convincing, and adventurous; saying yes to him never seems as bad of an idea as it probably is... until it’s too late.As of right now, being dragged through the woods by a very determined Luz, that moment still hasn’t quite hit. Joe can feel it gnawing at the back of his mind. They shouldn’t have left the rest of the group; they shouldn’t have snuck into the woods at night; this is how horror movies happen, and how the stupid people die first. Right now, he and Luz are being the exact type of people who he’d be screaming at through a TV screen, and Joe knows it.For a second, turning back seems like the only rational thing to do — and then another sharp yank from Luz jerks him out of his wariness. Yeah, this is probably an awful idea, but who the hell cares?They came out here for a reason, after all, and no one has ever called Joe Toye a coward. He’s not going to backtrack because of some invisible threat in the woods when Luz is very present, in front of him, right now.Luz finally stops in the middle of a grove of trees, and releases Joe’s hand. Slowly, he turns to face him; an impish grin lights him up, the only thing brighter than the moon in this otherwise dark forest. Joe looks at him and feels a current of electricity twine around them both like greedy, starving hands.“It’s official,” Luz declares. “I’m calling it. We are lost in the woods.”“Whose fault is that?” Joe demands, taking a step close. Luz’s eyes sparkle.“Well, ya know, you could lay the blame wherever you want, but I think it really comes down on whoever decided camping out in these parts was a great idea, or maybe the idiot who decided to sneak away in the first place —“Joe rolls his eyes and reaches out, seizing George by the collar of his shirt. The other man’s words cut off in a short “urk”, but he doesn’t protest. Rather than straining, he sinks into Joe’s chest like he was craving this contact all along. Now that it’s finally here, he could not look more pleased with himself.

”You’re fuckin’ ridiculous,” Joe tells him, and ducks his head to kiss him.

There’s no protest from Luz; he’s getting exactly what he wants. As soon as Joe offers him a taste, he goes after the entire prize with fervor. He presses himself against Joe, kissing hard and gripping harder, until they are both breathing heavily and clutching each other like they are the only things on earth.

”Aah, Luz,” Joe hisses, tree bark digging into his back. “God --”

Luz detaches himself from Joe’s neck, looking as debauched as he does wicked. “Am I really hearing a complaint right now?”

”Come on,” Joe hisses, and they both know what he’s really saying. Don’t stop. Never stop. As long as it’s you, I don’t care where we are or what we’re doing. I could stay like this forever.They’re so lost in each other that even Joe, whose reflexes are sharp on a bad day, isn’t paying attention to their surroundings. He can not focus on the crackle of dried leaves beneath their feet when Luz’s mouth is attacking his. He cannot worry about the ever-present feeling of being watched when they are surrounded by darkness, and it is the one thing concealing the hand steadily inching up the back of his shirt.

He isn’t paying attention to anything except Luz, Luz, Luz.

Not until the noise.

It’s not the sort of noise you’d expect to hear in the woods, or one that can be explained away. It’s not the cracking of branches, or the whistle of the wind; it’s not the low groan that slips past Luz’s lips as Joe’s fingers dig into his back. It is a roar, the sort no animal could make -- a steady rumble that starts deep from the bushes behind them and embeds itself inside of Joe’s bones.

It lasts for three seconds, then stops. The world goes silent once more.

For a second, neither one of them move. They are both in disbelief, too caught up in uncertainty to process what actually happened. Then Joe pulls back, slowly turning so that Luz is against the tree, while he’s standing in front of him.

“Joe?” Luz’s fingers dig into his shoulders, hard enough to bruise. His eyes are wide; his skin looks translucent in the moonlight. “What was that?”Joe remains silent for a second, straining to her another sound, before he replies, “I dunno.”They both know what it sounded like, but neither wants to say it. Neither of them want to say “did that sound like a fucking chainsaw to you?” because saying it out loud makes it real, and let’s just say neither of them are prepared to face that.

It wasn’t a chainsaw, Joe tells himself firmly, even as every muscle in his body tenses up. It was a bird; a deer; a freaking bear, whatever the hell lives in these woods. It was not, by any realm of possibility, some maniac with a giant weapon lurking in the shadows.

Their breaths are heavy and rasping in the night air. Luz’s eyes are impossibly large, gaping up at him for answers Joe does not have. Joe can feel his heart pounding like a drum, hard enough to burst out of his chest.

“Joe,” Luz says again, and his voice is small. Joe’s fingers tighten around his shoulders.

That’s when he sees it.

A figure lumbers out of the shadows, faster than anything that size should be able to move. He is bulky, bigger than Joe with just as much muscle -- but the most alarming thing about him is the massive chainsaw he holds, which glints in the light when he moves.

Joe curses out loud and shoves Luz back. He hears him hit the tree hard behind him, but all his attention is focused on the maniac lumbering towards them.

He should have listened to the goddamn horror movies.

Logic says he should run away. Logic says the only sensible thing to do is to haul ass, if they want to avoid becoming the next skin suits in some crazy fucker’s collection. Logic has very little sway over Joe when he’s good and pissed off -- and nothing makes him see red faster than someone threatening the people he cares about. Especially George Luz.

Logic says you should not tackle the guy holding a chainsaw, but fuck logic.

They both go down, the chainsaw screaming all the way. Joe is on top of the dude, throwing punches into any vulnerable area he can reach. The chainsaw shrieks near his neck, not drawing nearer but definitely too close for comfort. Joe twists the man’s arm, hoping to force the weapon from his hands.

It doesn’t work -- the guy recovers fast enough to land his own punch to Joe’s face, sending him reeling back. He has just enough time to see the chainsaw swing before he ducks to avoid it -- but a blinding pain catches him in the shoulder all the same.

Joe hollers, falling back. This is the only thing that keeps the saw from severing his arm. As he hits the ground there is a sickening noise, and the agony that blinds him is enough to make him howl again. His arm is still on, but only just --and now the guy with the chainsaw is charging towards him.

The guy’s wearing a fucking football helmet, Joe thinks deliriously. This is the worst knockoff Friday the Thirteenth they’ve ever made.

He tries to stagger to his feet, but the blood loss makes him dizzy. He overbalances, a noise like a wounded animal escaping him as he hits the dirt once more. His leg comes out to try and catch the maniac in the knee, but he falls short. The chainsaw raises, glinting in the moonlight.

Then suddenly another howl echoes through the forest -- deranged, terrifying, like a thousand rabid monkeys descending all at once -- and Luz flings himself onto the maniac’s back.

What happens next is so chaotic that Joe’s distraught brain can barely process it, let alone believe it. Luz rains a volley of blows upon their attacker’s rock-solid back and shoulders, but the only place they have any effect are his neck. The man thrashes, trying to throw him off, but Luz is on him and won’t let go. A sold punch to the throat sends the chainsaw falling to the ground, and that’s when Luz gets him in a chokehold.

It’s over in a solid twenty seconds. A body that big needs air, and when it can’t get it...

As the maniac collapses to the ground, Luz falls off of him. He’s breathing hard, but still has the presence of mind to kick the chainsaw out of his reach. Their attacker looks like a massive fallen tree on the forest floor. He does not move, even when Luz leaps over him to get to Joe’s side.

“Jesus, are you okay? Joe, talk to me, buddy, come on --”

“My fucking arm,” is all Joe can say; then, after a beat, “Did you just fucking choke him out?”

“You’re damn right I did,” Luz replies, and flashes that grin -- the one that drives Joe crazy, the one he would do anything for, the one that made him fall in love with George Luz in the first place.

That grin is the last thing Joe sees before he passes out.

(”And that,” finishes Luz, “is why you gotta take those horror movies seriously. You might learn something one of these days?”

“Like what?” Guarnere snorts. “That you’re a fuckin’ liar? That didn’t happen.”

“Or did it?” Luz shoots back, fixing Guarnere with an intense stare. When Guarnere looks over at Joe -- alive and in one piece in his own bed, where he’s been struggling to hide his smirk throughout Luz’s story -- he gets only a raised eyebrow. Suddenly, he’s not so sure.

“Alright. You are the horror movie stereotypes,” he retorts, and that’s the end of the argument.)

[pinksweatergettingbetter]

warning, the following has mainly snarky (and possibly furious) opinions on Spirit of Justice. Reader discretion is advised.

alright. part two, here we go

-

“she’s safe”

“I’m afraid you’ve lost me”

the words ‘maya’ and ‘safe’ do not go together in phoenix’s dictionary 

-

...Phoenix’s phone has caller ID??

-

ooh a phone vocal-blip. cute

-

ok fuck you how is the Benefactor keeping tabs on them?? Did Atishon use his One Phone Call to report to headquarters or something???

-

“I admit, I didn’t see that coming”

well spoilers guys I know who the benefactor is, and they have to be pretty fucking stupid not to know that a spirit medium is needed for this.

-

“its your friendly neighbourhood dragon”

no dhurke, youre not cool enough to be spiderman.

-

“you cant lay a hand on maya fey, and i mean literally”

>foreboding 

-

[sighs deeply]

guys. just. fucking call edgeworth. he’s chief prosecutor of america and his sister is part of INTERPOL. call edgeworth and just. fix the fucking problem. right now.

-

“No time to explain”

ggghhghghhghghgh

-

...oh. there’s edgeworth

...............now watch him be completely fucking useless

-

.......ARE YOU KIDDING ME

PHOENIX /DID/ CALL EDGEWORTH THE MOMENT MAYA WAS KIDNAPPED AND HE STILL WENT THROUGH HIS FUCKING “DUHHH BETTER DEFEND THIS OBVIOUS CRIMINAL” SHIT??

-

oh edgeworth. you and your chartered planes.

whenever he does that i like to imagine he hired MJN air.

-

Edgeworth...

A) Why are you letting Dhurke be involved? Just cut him out, send Franziska and Lang in with a team of guys and kick the shit out of the enemy

B) You don’t need to conceal someone on a charter jet. You chartered it. You can do whatever the fuck you want with it. Besides, Dhurke got into the country p easily, he can get out the same way.

C) Dhurke is a criminal. Depending on what he’s done as a rebel, he could be as guilty in your country as his home country. Why are you acting like he’s innocent? Aren't you kind of by-the-book?

-

oh yeah and despite the fact that they’ve updated Phoenix’s sprite, Miles still looks like a frozen plank of wood. Thanks :\

-

Apollo: Sorry Trucy, guess you have to hold all the unnecessary evidence and hold down the fort and be LEFT BEHIND FOR A CHANGE AAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

-

oh. this is a really nice garden.

the drama theme is kinda harshing the mellow tho

-

o hai rayfa

-

um. what the fuck. that mask must make it pretty difficult to do shit pal

-

Garan, whilst ordering her henchmen online: drama queen or king preferred 

-

UR DIARRHOEA, GAH-RAHN

cool theme, love the use of the royal “we”. 

-

“what about those guards over there”

“ohh, just prepared to fuck shit u–– iii mean help you haha.”

-

yeahhh... I'm not buying her super calm “my husband is a kidnapper” attitude. 

-

UIGSFILGFLIS DHURKE YOU FUCKING MORON

god he’s such a useless piece of shit. unless he’s trying to get taken so that he can be taken to... idk, wherever Maya is held in some sort of Gambit, he’s a real moron for just up and outing himself like that.

-

BAAAAARBED HEAD. YOU HAVE SOME SPLAAAAAAAAININ TO DOOOO

-

man why do they even give us other options if we can’t use them???

-

“Dhurke... I sure hope he’s alright”

hey apollo wanna hear a secret

i dont 

-

Phoenix externally: Patience, Apollo, patience.

Phoenix internally: we are so screwed at any moment the queen could be all “OFF WITH YOUR HEAD” and i’ll never see trucy or maya again jesus holy mother buddha help me

-

i love that Garananana is kinda just chilling with them. You got more important shit to do, queenie. like being evil 

also open your goddamn mouth once in a while, sheesh

-

Apollo: I hope no one gets hurt

The entire series of ace attorney as a whole: oh honey

-

wait ... INGA HAD A RATTAIL?!

-

ohhh yesss listen to those punches

why couldn’t they have animated it too ;w;

-

phew. im glad Maya’s ok. 

-

yeesh... poor Rayfa.

-

i love that even apollo’s like “fuck dad, you didn't kill him, did you?????”

its a beautiful contrast to how adamant he was about Trucy not killing Manov. 

-

um, soundtrack, now is not the time for Grand Revival. I know Edgeworth is on screen but the shit he’s saying is far, far from uplifting.

-

“it seems prosecutor sahdmadhi has grown quite fond of her”

nooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

-

“they’ve almost become a team of sorts”

ok so mark Ema down on the list of AJ characters who will never be seen again after this game.

fuck man i’d even take Klema over this 

-

can you imagine if they'd split up Apollo/Phoenix  Edgeworth/Athena instead

i really wonder how Athena and Edgeworth would interact. Athena’s spunky enough to be a bit like Kay I suppose, so maybe similar to that.

-

again, Kooraheen’s detention centre theme is really quite pretty

too bad i have to look at Dhurke’s face while listening to it

-

...a tasty... hash house

i

oh apollo’s up for that

well tbh if i was him i could use some hash after all this shit

-

yEAH YOU TELL’IM APOLLO

SMARTEN THAT BASTARD UP

-

god apollo he’s not worth it. i’d say leave the fucker to his fate but i guess it is important to find the real killer... sigh

-

apparently queen Amara liked insensitive fuckbags with masculinity issues

oh well. to each their own.

-

>:( don’t compare Dhurke’s story to Phoenix’s, Apollo 

-

“you ran?! but why?!!”

oh i dunno, athena, maybe the fucking death penalty?????

-

hang the fuck on

are you telling me that Dhurke started making trips to his shitty abandoned law office via sewer... while Apollo was still with him?!

Like what fucking reason would he have to drag him down there?! The place is an archive/resistance base, but Apollo and Sadmad lived in the mountains as children; why the fuck would he take his /kids/ into town at the risk of having them all arrested at once?!

WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM, DHURKE

-

that orb better be a fucking laser or some shit cause I'm really tired of hearing about it 

-

oh......... hi sadmad..................... what a pleasure to see you........... again................

just as fucking pleasant as ever

-

i love that Dhurke is like “what happened to fighting the man, son??”

like even if he is a double agent he can’t very well just be like “psst I'm still on your side!!!!” in front of the fucking guard 

i hate that dhurke’s face is so placid during this too.

“Son, why did you betray me? Also how was the sports game?”

-

“The Nahyuta you knew exists no more”

yeah sure sadblackworth, whatever you say

-

oh well that was abrupt 

meh, onwards to the tomb

-

“No, that’s the holy mother. She’s the one who brought spirit channeling to Khura’in”

oh so you mean Ami Fey.

-

oh ema... i’ll miss you while youre off being Sadmad’s lapdog 

-

“You mean His Ephemeral Holiness?”

Yes, Ema, fight it!!! Fight it!!!!!!

“But when he manages a smile and compliments my work, it’s hard to say no.”

...nuts. 

-

wait what do you mean the defendant is someone you know

you met Dhurke like once a day ago 

-

aw apollo took the locked-room-mystery words right out of my mouth. i love him so. why are they going to take him away?

-

 alrihgt back to this shit after like a 3 month hiatus or something 

-

i love how chill everyone is talking about Maya’s kidnapping 

“oh yeah he brought her here to the tomb so nobody would see. sensible thing to do. oh also maya almost died but i guess that’s nbd”

-

casually opens a tomb

casually opens the sarcophagus hangings  

casually tries to open the sarcophagus when told there’s a mummy inside

apollo, you're contracting douche-itis from everyone else. this old family of yours is a bad influence.

-

...we’re gonna yeet this sarcophagus arent we 

-

i love that Amara’s just kinda. depicted standing there as she’s burned to death. i mean i guess theyre trying to preserve her beauty and dignity in death but it also makes her look like an idiot who didnt try to escape the flames. 

ooh i like that last one though

-

pff thats a pretty well-equipped corpse line

-

“Where’d the other three bullets go?”

“Maybe Dhurke ate them?”

if he did they'd better have a VERY good explanation 

-

“the poor guy”

EMA

HE WAS HOLDING MAYA HOSTAGE

-

“the cuffs of justice”

love it

-

“just one of those traditions people do and they dont know the reason why”

“like rolling up your sleeves?”

“or your psychology, if we’re going there” HE FUCKING WENT THERE

OOOOOOOOOOO I LOVE YOU APOLLO

-

“he said grape juice has something in it that helps you relax”

are we going into grape juice lore here

"Really? ...Um, are you sure he was talking about regular, plain old grape juice?”

Yes, actually, Athena. It’s canonical that it is /actual off-the-vine welsh’s good ol’ sippy cup grape juice/. It’s not a metaphor or a censoring for kids, it’s just juice.

Of course, this is written by the DDSOJ staff. And considering the intense, dark n’ gritty action makeover the series got, I wouldn’t put it past them to retcon the juice into the... “fermented variety”. thanks Athena.

Yayyy not only do they write shitty dads, but they have to retroactively en-shitten Phoenix as an alcoholic father. Gosh, I sure do love these guys.

(obviously this isn’t a dig at anyone who head canons gj as wine, there’s a difference between head canons and malicious retconning.)

-

hmm interesting mechanic for this chair. i guess since you can’t stuff it in your inventory you cant do the ‘look all over’ thing. but on the other hand, they REALLY wanted to impress you with that hidden blood.

-

Ema: [performs a blood test in 2 seconds] I didn’t get a match!

Well probably not in that time, babe

i have to commend them on the little cutscene though that was nice. 

-

again, i guess Amara really liked emotionally stunted fuckwads

the devil horns are a bit much, though.

-

oh damn.

thats a nice ass pendant 

...oh thats blood

well, it sets off the pink and gold quite nicely. and its a butterfly... seems like something Dahlia would wear

-

“speak of the devil...”

speak of the devil indeed. hiiiiiii sadmad... its been a while.

-

oh ok he didnt say anything 

also i find it funny that apollos like “Wait!! wait!! damnit, after him!”

and then you just. go back into the talk menu with Ema. bit of a moment killer, there.

-

“why does everything have to be so difficult with you?”

cause hes a prosecutor, apollo. thats just how it is on this bitch of an earth 

-

“the law is the law. placing personal feelings above it is beyond reprieve”

ah but placing religion above it is totally fine. gotcha yuts

-

“And the winner is... prosecutor Sahdmadi!”

helpful, athena

-

“it’s like he’s trying to cover something up with his pretty words!”

oh did you mean the inevitable reveal that he's actually a good guy and we have to forgive him for being a shitwad? 

-

oh wow. that joke post about sadmad developing generalized anxiety was actually based on a legit thing that happened 

is it ok if i hate him even more for it? i mean how did he figure it out? he didn’t let apollo use it in court so where would he have gained the knowledge? unless he knows about Thalassa’s abilities...

...also, how /is/ he doing this? the way Perceive works isn’t just “i can sense that you’re uncomfortable”, it’s that people who can use it have extremely good eye-sight and see tiny little movements in other people. If they’re smart about it, they can tell that the movements mean the enemy is lying. Apollo just happens to get tense when he notices this, most likely because he’s kind of straining his eyes.

But then again that brings up the fact that his power would act up CONSTANTLY, either because EVERYBODY FIDGETS, or Apollo himself could just be stressed and making the bracelet squeeze on its own.

So thanks, SOJ. Not content with ruining Apollo’s canon, you’ve also got to ruin his cool lawyer power. Gosh, you’re just the gift that keeps on giving, aren’t you? 

-

“Powerless in the face of the Holy Mother’s blessings”

SOJ team is now nicknamed the Holy Mother. Or possibly the Unholy Mother.

-

“Looks like your power won’t work against Sadmadhi. Guess we’ll have to try something else.”

“Yeah, let’s ask Dhurke...”

Yeah. Because you obviously don’t have someone with you RIGHT NOW who ALSo has a special power. You dont even have TWO POEPLE with you with a special power. Guess we’d better talk to the man who birthed this shiteater.

-

“I won against Mr. Wright”

yeah in a completely rigged trial where losing would be the worst option. thats not really something to brag about, you know.

-

“...doomed to be reborn as something lower than a bug or a vegetable”

you heard it here first folks Sadmad hates sustaining agriculture and the bees.

-

>Lang’s scrolls and dickfuckery

>Edgeworth’s by-the-bookishness

>Franziska’s catchphrase

>Blackquill’s backstory twist

These were the ingredients chosen to make the perfect prosecutor. But the SOJ writers accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction: BAD WRITING 

THUS UNINSPIRED ASSHOLE WAS BORN!

-

apollo you don’t matter to anyone anymore youre getting the boot. do as your foster pop said when you were a drowning 5 y/o and suck those pussy baby tears back into your skull.

-

welp thats it for part one of investigation day 2. now (i think) we’re headed over to the delicious pandering of Phoenix and Edgeworth, back together. Will it bring me solace despite being an obvious ratings grab?

good god, i hope so.

till next time.

[azzgfgqui]

Just pleasing your body. Animal instincts that's what they were. In and out. Bim bum bam and once you got this so called dunno colpo di fulmine when you walk in a reastaurant and you ....flash out what the hell is happening who is she and why am I looking directly into her eye's or is she looking at me.....why am I behaving like these .....like I had an appointment with her and I've known her for ages.....and it's like some deja vu random situation......and you walk straight into this table where those four girl's are having a drink. She smiles at you and stop talking to her friend and I just say something and start talking while grabing a chair right next to her a while talking I ordered the waiter to bring some drinks and keep talķing to her and the all thing it's so strange.....only the one friend she is with try and keep trying to carry on whatever she was talking to her friend but she wouldn't listen and keep talking to me can't remember what. Anyway the friend gave me a bad look and dismissed the all thing with a click of the head and left us alone and that's when I almost got into something different. Different and pleasin never been my standard. I always looked for more or something that probably even me didn't know. I normally look for passion in all the things I do thats what drives me. Passion. It's always been a disadvantage because I like doing things and people's around me seing that they take advantage especially family. I don't like talking about this but anyway that's me. A bit out of ordinary I believe some might think but it's always been all wright to me. It's all about heart I believe in everything I do I put a lot of heart because that's what at the end of the day please me. I don't know how it goes with you but there always been something about you that captured me but I wouldn't be able to explaine it . It's the biggest feeling of the few I have and it's there can't explain just know that I love you and it will never change doesn't matter what you do. It's me I'm like that. When I was young or as a kid let's say I grew up in a difficult family and maybe myself too sensible. Anyway I decided I would never get married after seeing what I went through with my parents. So much hatred , always shouting offending each other it was a mental institute. As a kid of 4 I had problems with my feet and I couldn't keep standing and I probably developed some trait of character that maybe was not normal for a kid . I remember they were not good times. When they took me to Italy for the first time I was seen by a pediatric doctor and he confirmed I had a deformance with the feet bones and that the crying and all was due to the pain. So I was put on some orthopedic to help the structure and be able to walk. Off course subjected to all the comments that would come. But I dont considere myself being less to no one and at 5 I was far more intelligent then any other kid. With new orthopedic boots I was even able to play soccer and run and I'm still a very happy kid never mind that I was picked by a lot of kids I always stood my ground. I'm probably not common and I've never liked to be second best. It's all a challenge for me but life it's never been easy and I've always taken it as a challenge sometime even enjoying a certain amount of risk. Any way I was truly captured by you as a kid but you were my bigger brother friend and that was quite a big obstacle ever present in between us. Always were. Though it never pùt me off and it probably made things even if complicated but interesting. Like you see I normally get what I want to obtain letting out the bad sorts and all its never been my fault and I hope one day you'll give me a chanche to explain. Would matter a lot to me believe me. Im gonna eat now and carry on your story later darling love. Kiss