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💥 Take My Whiskey Neat 💥
Yandere Boothill x Reader
Again and again, you find a way to escape, and every time ends with you peering down the barrel of a gun.
Warnings: Yandere behaviors, forced relationship and captivity, implied kidnapping, some suggestive content but mostly sfw. Mild spoilers for his background story; I want to write him both as a super attentive and protective guy but also crazy for you???
You’ve become all too familiar with the sensation of a gun being pointed to your forehead.
“Aw, darlin’, why the long face? Took me two whole days to find ya this round! You should be proud’a yerself. I dare say our time together has taught you well,” he concludes with a wink.
Somehow, his praise feels more like a taunt.
That’s because it is. Obviously you never had a chance at escaping from him, a Galaxy Ranger with a bounty on his head worth more than your life a hundred times over. He was born and raised to hunt, to track, to kill. You’re just the unlucky target.
He leans the gun ever so slightly closer to you, mere inches before it can graze your skin, and waits for your response. Although you know he won’t pull the trigger, the sight of the 9 millimeter colt aimed directly between your eyes still sends goose flesh skittering down your arms.
You grit your teeth and pin him with a withering glare. The last thing you’ll relinquish is your pride—you’re not intimidated by him, and it is impressive that you evaded him for so long, relatively speaking. Your other escape attempts lasted mere hours.
Unfortunately, the fact that the Ranger has always traveled alone doesn’t help your chances—especially when lately, his only occupation has been you.
“What, no clap back today? No, ‘fudge you, ya son of a nice lady’ or ‘fork you, shirtbaggin’ bootlicker’? I’ve gotten so used to yer colorful language that I’m almost disappointed!” Boothill tilts the gun and juts his hips, his bullseye gaze locked on your own.
Ignoring the subtle look of longing, of hurt, within their depths is getting harder and harder. He’s superb at hiding it behind jokes and attempted curses, but you know that look. He’s clinging to you after all that’s been taken from him, seeking love after it was destroyed in flames. If only he still held onto his human emotions and didn’t rely on that neuro chip of his; then he’d know that what he’s showing you isn’t love, but obsession.
You wish you had never extended your kindness to him that fateful day, when he’d burst into your home, sparks flying and wires exposed. One of his arms was barely attached, completely torn through with bullet holes. A shootout, he’d said, and he’d caught wind of a handy ‘machine doctor’—a mechanic, you’d corrected him—in town who could fix him right up.
It had taken a full two weeks for you to get him back up and running functionally. Two weeks of evading IPC grunts knocking on your door in search of him, two weeks of tolerating (and fine, maybe even enjoying) his crude jokes, and two weeks of stories over a glass of whiskey, about your hope to one day travel among the stars and his of finding a companion to do so with.
That’s when he’d seemed the most human. Voice tinged with sorrow, yes, but lips curved into a morose smile, eyes looking up at the stars. Reminiscing about when he was still fully human, nothing but a cowboy on a seemingly insignificant planet, surrounded by his adopted parents and siblings, and even that little girl whom he never got to see grow up.
After he’d shared his story, you’d felt the sudden urge to be close to him. Without thinking, you’d brought your hand up to his cheek, wiping an invisible tear despite the fact that he lost his tear ducts long ago.
He’d sucked in a breath and gone deadly still; thinking you misjudged the situation and overstepped a boundary, you’d quickly started to jerk your hand back, only for him to lock it firmly against his face with his metal palm.
His voice, normally loud and clear through the synthesized distortion, had been quiet, low, wavering. “I—please, don’t stop. That feels…nice.”
You were sad to see him go after those two weeks. You honestly expected to never see him again—he was a Galaxy Ranger, after all, the definition of a lone wolf—but to your surprise, his visits didn’t end there. He kept returning again and again, and not just for repairs. Sometimes he’d bring you gifts or tell you stories of his hunt, and you’d cherish those moments when the galaxy felt just a bit less lonely with him.
Then the visits started to increase in their frequency—and intensity. He’d show up while you were working with a client and brazenly threaten them to leave so he could occupy your time instead, or he’d appear on your doorstep in the middle of the night with your favorite bottle of liquor, winking at the sight of your embarrassed form, still in your nightclothes. Your world suddenly seemed to revolve around the gunslinging cyborg.
You’d had to put your foot down—as much as you did enjoy his company, you wouldn’t allow him to interfere with your career. You’d worked hard to gain your skills, and even though you were barely scraping by and living in a tiny, modest home by yourself, you were still proud of what you’d achieved on your own.
His initial reaction was an uncharacteristic and frightening bout of silence, his pupils blown wide, locked onto yours. Just as quickly, his typical smirk returned as he laughed it off. “Just watch out, lil cutie, ‘cause I know you’ll be missin’ me soon.”
Apparently, soon was imminent, immediate. You were pouring yourself a drink after a long week of work when he finally kicked down your door and announced you’d be coming with him.
“I’ve been waiting a long while now to claim you, darlin’.”
“And if I refuse?”
That was the first time you witnessed his gun trained on you.
Now, Boothill drags you along everywhere, hopping from one planet or system to the next, living together as nomads. What you believed to be a serendipitous friendship, he thought was the start of your romance and life together.
It would be thrilling in any other circumstance, treading the path of The Hunt, evading the law, tracking down the IPC members who destroyed his family…except the cyborg transferred that need to protect, to save someone, onto you. You have no choice but to be his now, and he’ll be damned if he ever lets you go.
“You just want to hear me curse because you can’t,” you growl. What a stupid argument to be having with a pistol to your head. Yet you can’t help but siphon all of your anger into this dumb little game of cat and mouse, of shark and minnow, of hunter and bird.
He forgets you’re not the only one armed.
You flash him the most vulgar gesture you can make. “Go fuck yourself, Boothill.”
The cowboy throws his head back in a laugh. “Haha! There she is. Wild as a newborn colt.” He grins, flashing those shark teeth you’d groan to loathe. You’ve lost count of the number of puncture marks and scars they’ve littered across your flesh.
That’s something he can’t seem to get enough of—the feel of your warm, organic, human skin against his cold, steel shell.
“Lan shoot me with an arrow, do you ever shut the fuck up?” you grumble, looking up as if the Aeon will give you an answer.
“Think ya already know the answer to that,” he replies, lowering his weapon to sling his opposite arm around your shoulders. The gun hangs languidly from his other hand, as if he’s not the deadliest shot in the galaxy.
His breath brushes your neck as he leans in and nips at your ear. “Now, how ‘bout we take this back home, eh cutie? Two days without you has got me pretty…” His voice drops an octave. “…pent up, if ya know what I mean.”
The tooth marks along your skin flare. Oh, you know all too well.
~*~
Trying to find the solution to your imprisonment at the bottom of a bottle seems like a really clever idea, at least until the room starts spinning.
The empty glass cracks against the wooden table again as brown liquor burns down your throat. What did he call it? Rocket fuel? Damn right, and you’d lost count of the number of shots you’d taken.
Boothill’s normal smirk is contorted into a small frown. “Darlin’, I know it’s been a long couple’a days away for you, but I think we should retire the whiskey for the time being—”
“Shyut up!” you slur, jabbing a finger at the Ranger, your neck still throbbing from all the love bites and hickeys he’d given you. “Thiz is your fault.”
He reaches for the bottle, but you snatch it away and instead start to take pulls directly from it. A deep sigh reverberates behind you as you stand and begin to spin around, hands extended. “Aren’t we celebrating you catching me again? You got what you wanted, you…you mudder…fuuuu…” You sway and just barely catch yourself before you tumble—wait, no, that’s him steadying your shoulders.
“(Y/n).” You blink out of your haze momentarily; only on rare occasions does he use your name and not things like darling or cutie. His face is controlled, mouth tilted downward. “Put the bottle down. I know the feelin’ of wanting to drown in liquor, but it ain’t right.”
“I’m only like this because you took me from my life!”
He bares his teeth, and you know you hit a nerve. “That little shack you called a home? Was that really livin’? All those nights we talked, you said how you wanted grand adventure and risk! To travel and see the stars! To be with me!”
“I didn’t ask for you to put me in a moving cage,” you spit back, trying to shake out of his iron-clad grip. “But you never asked what I wanted, did you?”
“Why’s this all so hard for you to accept?” One hand moves to grab your chin, tilting your face towards his tall form. “It could be just us, ridin’ through the galaxy for all time.” His lips brush lightly against your own, and you feel a tinge of warmth run down your spine. “Just be mine.”
In your drunken stupor, your anger morphs into something else, something more carnal. He wants to be the predator? Well, even the hunted fight back sometimes.
The bottle drops from your hand, shattering against the floor, as you hook an arm around his neck and kiss him fervently, your tongue running along the edges of his pointed canines.
Before he can kiss you back, you pull away, wiping the back of your mouth with your forearm. “That’s what could have been if you hadn’t kidnapped me. If you’d asked me first.” Skipping over the remnants of the whiskey bottle, you flip him the finger over your shoulder as you walk away. “Too bad that’s all you’ll get. Fork you, Boothill.”
As soon as you leave the room, Boothill raises a metal digit to his lips, savoring the sensation of your warm mouth against his. So that’s what your willing kiss feels like. The true passion he knows is hidden deep in your soul, buried beneath the dirt like an unmarked grave. He releases a breathy laugh.
Well fork him sideways, but he wants more.
Taking his hat off, he sets it on the table and moves to pour himself a glass of sherry. He’s nearly positive he’ll find you passed out in bed if he goes to you now, and knows he shouldn’t, can’t be in the same room with you when his self control is so near to breaking. Better to let you sleep it off and tease you about the kiss in the morning.
Boothill kicks his feet up and takes a long sip. So, it turns out your drunken self may actually be harboring some attraction for him. Yeah, he can use that.
“I’ll have you someday,” he whispers, a promise to both you and himself. “Whiskey ain’t the only thing that’ll be on your lips, darlin’.”
#yandere boothill#yandere hsr#yandere honkai star rail#yandere x y/n#yandere x you#yandere x reader#yandere escape#yandere headcanons#yandere imagines#yanderecore#yandere male#yandere#yancore#honkai star rail#hsr#Boothill
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@ iluvmygf- nishimura riki x fem! reader: ch 7
description: nishimura riki is a headache to his managers. as much as he loves being an idol and as much as he loves that he gets the freedom to travel. he hates that he can’t show you off. publicly… as himself… so he makes a twitter account called @ iluvmygf at first not a lot of people follow it. it goes unnoticed, for a few weeks. until it doesn’t. his account about you goes viral… and people are nosy as to who loves their gf so much to constantly post about her.
genre: romcom, crack, humor, something fun and lighthearted like a hallmark movie. it’s also set from november-february bc i said so and i want a christmas ark 😋🫶 this is an smau
warnings: cursing, most likely crude humor, probably kms jokes
kms joke this chapter
TEXT + SOCIAL MEDIA CHAPTER
“DOOFUS”
riki’s first @ iluvmygf tweet before he decided to be stupid (the one beomgyu sent to the groupchat) 👇👇👇
___
MASTERLIST
taglist- open
@yourmomscuntis2tighy @yannew @wzy3ka @stellarpsh @czlluvriki @im-yn-suckers @owotalks @filmofhybe @skepvids @ocyeanicc @amymyli @imsodazed @rikislady @j-wyoung @bangchansbangers @sassyfanlawyergarden @miko1ly @itsactuallylina @haewonluvr @entenen @cb97mylove @jxp1-t3r @ineedaherosavemeenow @str4wb3rizz @beomgyusonlywife @jiaant11 @sweet-kisses-and-bloody-screams @enhaz1 @mrchweeee @stryroses @riziwon @cholexc @soobiverse @tzuyusluv @hayleyrkbee @softiehee @captivq @yla-aira @svarcq @s00buwu @rodygr @ikeu4life @faraonatojishady @ohsjy @bts-iris @wqsty @en-gene2 @mrowwww @eumppattv @junsflow @ilurvriki @bunchofroses07 @ariadores @luvkpopp @asherthehimbo @realrintaro @myjaeyunn
comment, dm, send an ask, or reblog to be added :) i try to keep up with tag lists however i get a ton of notifications everyday so please lmk if i forget you. if you do choose to comment please do it on the masterlist.
a/n: heyyyyyy my loves <3 i wanted to get a chapter out today :3 also can we PLS MANIFEST that this chapter doesnt get like a weird thing on it. THE LAST CHAPTER WASNT EVEN BAD i literally dropped to my knees in target. anyways, i bought stuff online yesterday with a gift card and i bought the heeseung leopard print beanie so that is soooooo fun, maybe i will post it if i am feeling goofy enough also matpat retiring i think i should retire from breathing 🤒🤒🤒 ALSO WHERE IS CORYXKENSHIN????? he needs to play parasocial i
#nishimura riki#nishimura riki imagines#nishimura riki x reader#enhypen#enha#enhypen imagines#enha imagines#nishimura riki texts#nishimura riki smau#enha smau#enhypen smau#nishimura riki scenarios#enhypen nishimura riki#riki nishimura#jungwon imagines#heeseung imagines#jay park imagines#jake sim imagines#sunghoon imagines#sunoo imagines#riki x reader#jungwon smau#heeseung smau#enhypen texts#enha texts#jay park smau#jake sim smau#smau#kpop smau#sunghoon smau
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Protective Hotch
Description: There is a copycat the BAU are after, so Hotch and reader go to prison to talk to the original offender. The prisoner makes a few suggestive comments about the reader that Hotch doesn't like.
Made up, not a CM episode.
Word Count: 2.5k
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You had only ever stepped inside a prison a handful of times before. Literally. You could count every visit on one hand, all whilst being able to recount why you'd gone those 4 times in the first place; now 5.
The first 3 were all for the same thing, and the same person. A serial rapist and murderer you had helped catch years earlier was being interviewed, and not only did you have to supervise, but perform a psych eval on him as well.
The fourth time, you were in and out in record time. Another prisoner you'd put away had died and you were there purely to collect the few belongings in his cell. When the Warden of the Penitentiary had called you to inform you of the inmates passing, you offered to come down from Virginia. The Warden suggested not bothering, and that they'd just throw his belongings in the rubbish bin, which is exactly why you got on the earliest plane you possibly could. This particular inmate had victims he'd not told you about, and you just wanted to make sure with your own eyes he didn't name them in or on anything in his cell.
Today though, on your fifth time inside prison walls, you weren't alone. Your company came in the form of your long time workplace crush, Aaron Hotchner. The pressure of having not only your crush, but the BAU's Unit Chief with you put an immense weight on your shoulders.
Usually you weren't fazed by the cold glares and almost bored expressions. Aaron Hotchner exuded power and had subconsciously mastered the art of intimidation, but that wasn't what made the hairs on the back of your neck stand as he walked beside you, down prison halls.
It was how close beside you he walked. The outside of his arm brushed yours with each step and sway of his arms, and even though you could see, in the corner of your eye, his head facing forward, you could feel his eyes bouncing all over the place.
He stood close not because he wanted to, but because even if every cell door was closed, and every hall had 3 guards tending to it at all times, he didn't feel 100% safe, which meant he wasn't comfortable having you around. Because he knew, that if by some fluke chance the doors buzzed open, you would be every prisoners target.
He knew it. You knew it. The inmates knew it.
"Oh Hey Baby, how about taking a detour and stopping by my cell?" Somebody off to the side hollered, which lead to a loud array of crude comments made your way. You ignored them well, but Hotch seemed to take offence for you. You were almost at the end of the hall, but that didn't stop Hotch from protectively stepping even closer, almost tripping you up with how close he now was.
You both got to the door at the end of the hall, the guard standing beside it nodding at the two of you before letting you in. You walked in first, Hotch shutting the door behind himself as you stepped up to the one sided glass, looking at the man you both were about to question.
"Certainly not the kind of man I'd enjoy being alone with" You stated, Hotch stopped beside you and looking into the visitors room, his arm brushing yours again. Relatively old and greying, Martin Gould was NOT a sight for sore eyes. He wasn't attractive, which is what ended up being a factor of his killings. He'd ask a woman out, she'd reject him, he'd later stalk her, and then rape and mutilate her, in her own home.
"I wouldn't have brought you if I didn't need you. I'm not going to leave your side. I promise" Hotch told you. When you and the team had been going through victimology of the copycats and then compared them to the original killers, you'd all come to the same conclusion. You were his type, to the T.
That's why you were here. Not because your skills were valued and appreciated...but because you were this guys type, and you hated that. You hated feeling like you had to prove yourself more, in a team you'd been in for years. You worked 5 times as hard as everyone else, and yet still felt like you'd gotten nowhere at being seen as an asset to the team. Nobody had ever said it to your face, hell maybe they'd never even thought that way about you, but you were an avid overthinking pessimist.
"Everything is going to be fine" Hotch reassured you again when you didn't reply to his promise. You sighed, grabbing the door that separated you two from Martin Gould.
"Easy for you to say. He raped and mutilated 13 women" Before Hotch got time to process what you'd said and the weight of your words, you opened the door and stepped inside. Martin Gould immediately looked to you as you entered, paying little to no attention to Hotch as he followed behind, and took the seat beside you at the metal table.
"Wow. Just wow" Martin sighed, leaning forward and resting his chin on his open palm, as he stared at you like you were the brightest star in the sky. At least someone appreciated you.
"Martin, I'm SSA y/n y/l/n, and this is SSA Aaron-"
"Has anyone ever told you you've got the eyes of a rare jewel?" You ignored him, and continued on like he'd never interrupted you in the first place.
"-Hotchner. We're with the FBI's Behavioural Analysis Unit-"
"No ring, I don't see how that's possible. You must have men down at your feet 24/7" Martin interrupted you again, shuffling forward in his seat slightly to get closer to you.
"We're here to investigate a string of serial rape and mutilations. Same signature as yours from 7 years ago" Hotch speaks for the first time, and you both notice Martin's jaw twitch at the sound of his voice. Martin takes a breath, ignoring Hotch before smiling back at you.
"Couldn't be me, Sweetheart" Martin tells you softly, lifting his hands and showing you the chains restricting his movement.
"It's a copycat, somebody who admires you. He's probably sent you hundreds of letters over the course of the last 7 years" Martin holds his smirk as he listens to you, enjoying the sound of your voice and the way your lips move with each word.
"They would've started with him confiding in you, expressing his share of troubles involving women rejecting him. Then they would've started becoming a little more aggressive" You state, Hotch straightening his posture, one of his tells that he's about to talk.
"Probably wrote 'What is wrong with me?' over and over again" Hotch adds, Martin's smile faltering as he speaks again.
"And then his most recent letters would've been him talking about women like we're a virus. Something nasty that could be caught and had to be terminated" Martin shook his head ever so lightly, his smile growing with every second you continued talking to him. He's a classic narcissist and thinks that the fact you're talking directly to him and looking him dead on, means you're flirting with him.
"As pretty as you are, you're just like them, aren't you?" He asked slowly making you frown.
"I'm sorry?" Martin leans forward a tiny bit more, the smile on his face long gone and replaced with a look of repulsion.
"A needy whore, asking for it-"
"That's enough" Hotch stated.
"Begging for it. You all lead us on with your smiles and your glances, but then you laugh in our faces and tell us to get lost" So that's why he thought these women deserved it. Because to him, an innocent smile and a half a second passing by glance meant flirting. So when he'd walk up and randomly ask a woman out and she'd say no, he'd see her as a tease, a deceiver, someone who needed to pay.
"You're nothing less, Agent y/n y/l/n. Just a whore with a bitching, lying mouth, and a pussy asking to be-" Hotch sliding back in his chair and abruptly standing up caught you off guard more than Martin Gould's random verbal attack.
"Y/n, out" Hotch demanded, leaving no room to argue against his direct order. But you did anyway.
"No, Hotch, I'm fine-"
"Y/l/n, out or you're suspended for a week" Your face contorts with shock. Never has Hotch ever been so forward and aggressive towards you in your life and you hated how being on the receiving end of his threat made you feel.
"What?" You stood and raised your voice, finding Hotch completely unreasonable in this moment. You were with a prisoner who know who the unsub was, you could easily get it out of him, and now here he was sending you out. He brought you all this way for a couple sentences?
"You're not being forceful enough, Agent. Bend her over and teach her a-" Martin's words became background noise as Hotch took your arm, backing you up to the door of the visiting room, before opening the door and practically shoving you out. He let go before you could rip your arm from his grasp, and shut the door in your face.
Not knowing what the hell just happened and why the hell Hotch reacted like that, you storm over to the one sided glass window, and slam your palm against the button under the window that allows you to hear what is being said inside the visiting room.
"I don't care who you are, or where we are. If you ever talk to my Agent like that, ever again, I'll make you sure I am the last thing you ever see" Hotch threatened, the look on his face sending a wave of goose bumps over every inch of your burning skin. He looked furious.
"Probably not the best place to threaten killing me, Agent Hotchner" Martin stated, trying to hold back his laughter. It quickly died down at the expression adorning Hotch's face. It was almost like he was being challenged.
"I don't need to kill you to take away your sight, Gould. All I need is a speculum and a pair of scissors" Hotch replied and you watched in shock as for the first time since talking with him, Martin looked anything but cocky. Hotch used Martin's current state to his advantage.
"His name" Martin hesitated, glancing at the one way window like he knew you were standing behind it.
"Dane Hansen" The second the name left his mouth, Hotch was turning around and exiting the visiting room, only to be met with an annoyed you, giving him the cold shoulder. His eyes stayed glued to yours as he shut the door behind himself.
"Don't give me that look."
"I was given about 10 seconds from the first time you told me to get out before you threatened to suspend me. If you want me gone just say it, Hotch" You knew you were probably being unreasonable but you were annoyed. What so quickly went from 'get out' turned to 'if you don't you're suspended'. It escalated in seconds and made you wonder how long they'd been sitting on the tip of Hotch's tongue.
"Was I the only one that heard the way he talked about you?" Hotch questioned, clearly annoyed by your assumption. You take a step toward him.
"Simply sending me out of the room doesn't stop me from hearing it, Hotch" You brought attention to your hand by tapping the button again, turning off the speaker. Hotch took a step forward.
"He was getting satisfaction out of you being in the room" My presence. My face. My body. Not my skills, and Hotch knew that. He only brought me to show me off.
"Be honest with me, Hotch. Do you bring me along for these things because you think I'm the worst profiler on the team, so I won't be needed as much back there with everyone?" Hotch frowns at me, turning his head to the right slightly.
"I have never once called you a bad profiler."
"You've never called me a good one either, Aaron. Believe it or not, but I'm one of those people that need to be told they're doing good to keep doing good. I need the validation, otherwise I lose energy and end up giving a half assed effort" You immediately realised the first name slip, but if Hotch noticed it he certainly didn't show it. Instead, he takes another step that makes him dangerously close. You can smell his musky cologne, and if either of you take another step your face would be buried in his chest.
"Y/n, you're not a good profiler, you're an amazing profiler. I didn't bring you along today to show you off as a piece of meat to Gould. You're his type, but so is Prentiss. I wanted you here. I wanted you on the plane, and I wanted you in the car. I like your company, I like your perspective and I like your brain" You suck in a shaky breath, embarrassingly overwhelmed so quickly by Hotch's compliment. Even though it's only a few things, it means so much because he's not the kind of guy to get even slightly sentimental about anything.
"You think I don't notice when the overthinking side of you takes over the reasonable side? You're an asset to our team, y/n. I didn't bring you along for the benefit of the case, I brought you along for myself" Tense silence consumes the room and the air the two of you breathe. For what feels like minutes, you two stand, almost toe to toe staring at each other.
There's an achingly intense energy floating around the two of you, and before looks go any further or before either of you can slice the tension in half, Hotch's phone rings, and you both rear back at the shriek.
Your shoulders sag in disappointment and you swear you see the same with Hotch's, but he's back in boss mode too fast for you to really catch a good look as he listens to somebody on the other end of the line.
"We're just heading out now. Yeah, we got a name; Dane Hansen" Hotch ends the phone call and his eyes meet yours again as he shoves his phone back in his pocket.
"We've got to go" You press your lips into a tight smile and nod. Walking past him, you go to grab the door that'll lead you back into the hall, but before you reach it a large, warm hand wraps around your wrist stopping you.
You turn back to Hotch, and again he's toe to toe with you. His grip on your arm is soft, and the look on his face mixed with his parted lips tells you all you need to know; he wants to say something.
You don't know what he's thinking, but you also don't want to force it out of him. You smile and slowly pull away from his grip before patting his arm.
"It's okay, Aaron. Come on, let's go."
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#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#aaron hotch fluff#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotch x you#aaron hotch imagine#aaron hotch hotchner#aaron hotch fic#aaron hotchner x female reader#criminal minds fanfiction#hotch#aaron
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My Old Friend, Fire
Azriel x Eris
Against his better wishes, Azriel has found himself growing close to the new Autumn High Lord, Eris Vanserra. The male has dug himself under his skin and now he can't get him out. An invitation to the Autumn Equinox changes the path of Azriel's life for the better.
Read on AO3
AO3 version is updated with editing and spelling corrections!!
Word count: 15,737
Azriel POV
18+
Content warning: Smut- story can be enjoyed fully without reading it!
*no beta, we die in Prythian
This is long, I apologize! It's a lot of feeling, realizing, and longing. Azriel's got all the emotions. Flashbacks are in italics- they all have important details in them that tie in at the end so don't miss 'em!
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"I would do it all again. I would suffer another five centuries of you loving another, another five centuries of facing my father's cruelty, another five centuries of being hated by all of Prythian just for this- just for you."
~~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~ ~~~~
Read full story below
Azriel shifted his weight from one foot to the other, fidgeting at the pinching sensation caused by the buttons on the wing-flaps of his jacket.
Mor had bought it special for him, special for today.
It was a tight-fitted jacket made of a dark, woodsy green fabric. Along the cuffs and collar were sewn black embellishments that swirled and shaped a pattern so complex that Azriel hated to think of how many hours went into creating it. Intricately carved silver buttons ran up the front and finished at a final clasp around the middle of his neck.
Mor said the jacket suited him, brought out the colors in his eyes. Azriel just felt like a fool.
He'd been on edge all week leading up to tonight. The Autumnal Equinox, Mabon. The Autumn Court's Great Rite.
It was Eris's first Equinox as High Lord of Autumn. He had graciously extended an invite to Rhysand, Feyre and the Inner Circle- his treasured allies he mockingly referred to them as in his letter- and encouraged them to come celebrate his new position and experience a true taste of Autumn.
"Treasured?"
Eris remained silent in response, bow drawn tight. His sharp gaze honed in on a pheasant, trackings its movement through the stalks of wheat. Its emerald neck acting as a beacon for the eye.
Azriel wondered what it would be like to be on the receiving end of that gaze, how it would burn.
On an exhale, Eris let the arrow fly. "Don't talk while I'm aiming, it's rude." He turned towards Azriel, not bothering to spare a glance to see if his arrow met its mark. Eris released a shrill whistle and his hounds took off, cutting through the stalks to their target.
"Treasured?" Azriel pressed again.
"I used my thesaurus for that one." Eris quipped back.
Azriel squinted his eyes at the High Lord. "You like being disliked, don't you. You're a masochist."
"You like me".
"I tolerate you." There was a chill in the wind that blew towards them across the field. It dusted red across Eris's pale cheeks, the fire in his blood seemingly not fighting the bite of the cold. "Here are the reports we have on Koschei. He's getting desperate."
Eris reached out for the thin file from Azriel, the full might of the hunter's gaze finally locked onto him. It burned right through him, just as Azriel had suspected. Burned right through to the icy center of him.
Rhysand and Feyre decided they would not attend. While they wanted to put on a good show for diplomacy, they deemed it unnecessary for the High Lord and High Lady to make an appearance. And as it is with them, where one goes so does the other. In their stead, Azriel, Mor, Cassian, and Nesta would be attending as representatives of the Night Court. Azriel was pretty sure Cassian and Nesta only decided to tag along because they wanted to fuck in the woods.
Azriel chuckled to himself as he remembered the conversation in which Cassian crudely explained to Nesta the erotic nature of Great Rite celebrations after nightfall. Nesta had known the basics, brief snippets of information from what Feyre had deigned to share with her about Calanmai, Spring Court's Great Rite, but wasn't aware the seasonal courts all had their own version. Nesta was all too eager to attend after learning everything.
Mor was attending because. . . he wasn't entirely sure. Azriel knew Mor had made great strides in accepting Eris as an ally of the court, knew that she had traveled the path of forgiveness with him and the two were on amicable terms. Amicable, nothing more. Eris certainly did not make it easy, he was still an asshole. Gods was he an asshole.
But Azriel also knew she was still haunted by the past. Saw it in the glaze in her deep brown eyes every time Keir threw barbed comments her way. Azriel gathered that this visit tonight would serve as one of Mor's final steps in conquering the demons of her past. Regardless, she seemed all too willing to attend.
It was part of the reason Azriel agreed to join the visit today- why Rhysand pulled him aside and adamantly requested he tag along. Though Rhysand's request left little room for disagreement.
He wanted Azriel there to keep an eye on Mor. Rhysand knew all too well how suffocating the horrors of your past could be. Azriel remembers vividly the nights, not too long ago, when dark power filled with shadows and stars would burst through his brother's window as he drowned under the weight of everything that haunted him.
.…........................
That's how Azriel found himself here, in the ornately decorated receiving room of the River House, the base of his wings getting pinched to Hel by the jacket Mor bought him for Mabon.
He's the first to arrive as usual.
It was barely past three in the afternoon but the sun, beaming in through the room's westerly windows, was already on a quick descent. His shadows dodged the rays and dissipated whenever they come in contact.
Azriel thumbed the plum, silk curtains that draped the large picture window whose frame he leaned on. Not that he would ever utter the thought out loud but he found the interior of his brother's home a bit gaudy. Fit for a High Lord, no doubt, but it felt impersonal.
Eris's manor smelled of sandalwood and cinnamon. Woodsy and sweet. The scent stuck inside of Azriel's nose, invading his senses. It invoked a nostalgia for an experience he had yet to live.
"The magic in Spring is growing weak- I can feel it in the land at our shared border. We need to get Tamlin back on track," Eris spoke without preamble. He stood opposite Azriel, a smoke gray granite countertop separating them. The texture of the stone rippled and eddied, it felt like the scars on his hands.
"Tea?"
Azriel nodded in assent and looked around the kitchen in which they stood. Dark brown wood laid the foundation of the room, it blended well with the warm colors of the furnishing.
"You made yourself right at home. Was your father's body even cold before you started moving in?" The question was probably too crude, even for Azriel.
Yesterday marked a month since the long awaited death of Beron Vanserra finally came to fruition.
Eris merely smirked over at him, taking his crass question in stride as he poured the second cup of tea. His eyes traced over every inch of Azriel's face before he responded, "You wound me, brute. This manor hasn't been inhabited since my grandfather. My father felt it too exposed and only resided in an apartment deep within the Forest House."
Azriel snorted. His only response. He continued to take in the room.
In the corner of the kitchen was a nook that housed a dining area encased by a dome of windows on one half. It gave the illusion that you were dining out in the jeweled canopy of the woods.
His attention caught on the dining chairs that surrounded the table.
They were all shaped to fit wings.
Growing weary of the solitude, Azriel decided to set out to track down Rhys, Feyre, and Nyx in the massive house when the carved wood door at the home's entrance swung open. From his spot within the receiving room, Azriel watched Mor strut in.
"I knew that color would look great on you," She tittered, looking him up and down, "you really ought to let me buy you more for your wardrobe."
Azriel's face pinched - answer enough to her demand.
"A shame" she bemoaned, throwing herself on to one of the room's stiff cobalt couches. "Where's Cass and his Lady Death? We should be off soon."
"Don't call her that." Azriel chastised, not having an answer for the first part of her question.
Mor just shot him a look, rolling her eyes. It's been a year and a half since Nesta sacrificed her Cauldron-stolen power for the life of her sister and nephew, yet Mor still clung to that infernal nickname. For Mor it's all in good fun, but Azriel never fails to catch the haunted look that ghosts Nesta's face whenever the moniker is used in her presence.
As if on cue, he heard the bustle of Cassian and Nesta coming in through the home's rear entrance. No doubt they landed on the back lawn after flying down from the House of Wind. Cass still likes to give Nesta a good fright by coming in hot for his landings, the back lawn providing a perfect landing zone for him.
Confirming his suspicions, Nesta's face is tinged with green as she rounded the corner and came in sight of Azriel and Mor.
"Cassian, they're in here," she called over her shoulder. Her hair, uncharacteristically, is worn loose today, with a tight braid running down the center of her head segregating both halves of her hair. Her mauve, linen dress was modest in the length of its hem and sleeves but clung to her frame in a way that suggested excellent tailoring. As she twisted to shout to his brother, Azriel noted the deep scoop of the dress's back.
"You look...very good today, Nesta." Azriel said to her as she twisted back around and entered the receiving room. Not that she didn't usually, though she now wore her Valkyrie leathers more often than not.
Mor interjected from the couch, "You didn't say anything to me! I even complimented your jacket".
"Your ego doesn't need anymore stroking, dear sister." Cassian quipped sarcastically, picking up the conversation without pause as he too rounded the corner and entered the room. "And, my even dearer mate is upset with me so she told me she'll be leaving me tonight for our beloved- her words not mine- High Lord of Autumn".
Azriel hummed his acknowledgment, not wanting to voice anything that may incidentally draw himself into the middle of their squabble.
Eris would probably think she looked drab in the linen dress.
"Linen is the fabric of the working class, Azriel," Eris drawled, a mischievous grin lifting the right corner of his mouth.
Even from his position on the leather tufted couch on the opposite end of the room, Azriel could see the mirth glimmering in Eris's eyes from where he sat behind his grand mahogany desk. Azriel twisted away from the sight to look back into the depths of the crackling fireplace that warmed the High Lord's office.
"You're just a snob", he shot at Eris, not bothering to turn around again.
He heard him snort. "Linen is a lightweight, breathable, porous fabric. It is designed to be worn by those working the fields. It's not supposed to be fashionable- I'd look like a fool wearing linen to a dinner with my court representatives. Apologies for knowing the intricacies of garments and how they relate to socio-economic class."
Azriel couldn't help himself. Throwing an arm across the back of the couch he twisted to look back at Eris again.
"Lightweight, breathable, porous fabric? You're a snob and an ass." He secretly delighted in the look of glee that flashed across Eris's face at the insult. "Why even ask for my opinion then? If your own was so decisive."
"I like to hear what you think." Nothing but truth burned in the amber flames of Eris's eyes.
"Thank you, Azriel." Nesta shot sharply at him. She lowered herself gracefully onto the couch opposite of Mor. Not allowing space on either side of her for Cassian and his wings, leaving him to settle in standing next to Azriel.
He felt a nudge on his shoulder and looked over at his brother who leaned in and said, "Nice jacket, Az. You look like a proper little prince of Autumn in it".
Azriel scoffed, taking a wide step away from his brother before quickly twisting his body to punch Cassian in the arm in retribution for his gibe.
Nesta guffawed from where she perched on the couch. Composing herself, she remarked, "At least he made an effort! You look like you're ready for a visit to Windhaven."
It was true. Cassian donned a standard set of his leathers, albeit cleaner and newer than his usual ones.
"Whatever. I'm not making an effort for the prick," Cassian shot, impudence lacing his tone. "It's an Equinox celebration that the entire court is invited to, at most we'll see him to shake his hand before he moves on to others he deems more worthy of his time."
He wasn't wrong. Like Calanmai in Spring, Grianstad in Winter, or Litha in Summer, denizens of Autumn flooded to their court's seat during Mabon to celebrate the equinox and participate in the Great Rite. It's a tradition, Azriel heard, that even Beron nurtured and encouraged. After all, a fruitful turnout for a Great Rite produces a wealth of magic for the court. Azriel is sure that another strong motivator for Beron's patronage of the event were the swaths of young fae females that showed up clambering for his attention, hoping the magic of the Rite would choose them for their High Lord. Even the deep-seated fear and corruption that Beron plagued the land with wasn't enough to dim the honor of being selected by whatever powers governed the Rite.
This year, for the first time, it would be Eris's turn to lead the Great Rite. He would pair off with a lady and together they would fuel enough magic to inundate the land until the next Mabon. The thought settled like glass in Azriel's stomach.
"Even then," Cassian continued "he'll likely only deign to be touched by you, Nesta. The rest of us are too beneath him for an actual handshake."
"Speak for yourself, Cassian," Mor chimed in indignantly.
Nesta hummed in agreement and added, "He'd probably give Azriel a handshake. After all, he's the closest with Eris out of any of us at this point."
"We are not close," Azriel growled at her defensively.
He immediately regretted his tone when he saw the trepidation in her eyes. He felt like his father.
"Is your father still alive?" curiosity clouded Eris's face from across the chessboard between them.
Azriel's eyes flickered up to him for a moment to take in his demeanor before refocusing on the board as he took one of Eris's black marble bishops with his gleaming, white knight.
"How is that a pertinent question?"
"How is playing chess pertinent," Eris countered.
"As the official liaison between the Night and Autumn court, it's my duty to make sure our allies are properly schooled in all forms of strategy," Azriel arrogantly replied. He bit the inside of his cheek to keep his grin from spreading across his face. After six months of working with Eris as liaison between their two courts, he had come to enjoy the haughty banter the pair fell into in each other's presence.
"Azriel," Eris dead-panned.
Azriel would never admit to the shiver that ran through him at the sound of his name in Eris's mouth. Shame washed over him at the mere acknowledgement of the sensation.
"He's dead," he at last replied to Eris, dryly.
"He gave you those burns?"
Azriel only shook his head.
"You're ashamed of them." An observation, not a question from the High Lord.
Azriel settled his face into a sheet of neutrality. His centuries-old mental barriers slamming into place as the topic of conversation entered an area he had no interest in going.
Playing his turn, Azriel hoped to end the game quickly now. He shouldn't have stayed this long anyway, was only there to assess the durability of the security wards around Forest House as a courtesy to Eris.
Quiet blanketed them as the pair finished up their game. Azriel refused to raise his eyes to look at Eris.
"Beron would have healers erase all the scars he etched on me. For five centuries."
"I don't care, Eris." Cruel words that did not reflect the truth. He did care- deep down in a pocket of his soul that he never let see the light of day- he cared about what Eris had to say.
Azriel still refused to raise his gaze up to the High Lord sitting across from him.
"He would erase everything he did to me. No proof that I lived. No proof that I suffered. No proof that I survived. All my torment is trapped inside my head with no evidence that it happened, no outlet for escape... I wish he had left them... but that was probably the point of healing them in the first place."
Eris's declaration cut deep through him, burning through the layers of his defenses in a rage of fire.
He stayed for another round of chess.
Azriel ran a scarred hand down his face, mortification riding through him in waves.
"I'm sorry, Nesta, I didn't mean to snap."
Nesta shook off his words with ease. "I only mean to say, you literally are closest with him," she pressed on "the rest of us haven't even seen him since his crowning ceremony eleven months ago. You're the only one meeting with him anymore."
Of course. He was such an idiot. Of course that's what she meant.
Cassian came up behind him, clamped his hands on his shoulders, and jostled him jovially. His brother's voice boomed behind me, "Don't worry, Az, we know you still hate the lordling as much as ever. We'd never dare suggest otherwise." Azriel could've sworn he heard an undercurrent of sarcasm lacing his brother's tone.
But he didn't hate Eris. Didn't hate him at all. Dreaded the looks on his family's faces when they realized just how much he didn't hate Eris Vanserra anymore.
That was the other part of the reason he agreed to join the visit today. For the past eleven months he'd been working as the Night Court's liaison to Autumn, having taken it over from Cassian, he's found himself... inexplicably drawn to the High Lord. Perhaps in the absence of conflict, Azriel was subconsciously poking around for danger and adrenaline. Eris made his blood boil and he was addicted to it. Not that he would ever admit that out loud.
Mor was looking at him with an expression he couldn't decipher.
"We should go." Was all he said to the room.
The females got up from their respective places on the couches and together they all trundled through the receiving room out into foyer.
"Guess Rhys and Feyre don't want to see us off," Mor observed.
"Ten gold marks they're both dead asleep upstairs. Nuala told us that Nyx has started climbing out of his crib at night and that Rhys and Feyre can't leave him unattended for even a second," Cassian added, laughing.
The four of them headed out to the front courtyard, not wanting to check and risk waking the parents up. They cut across to a point that would put them outside the wards encasing the River House.
Nesta grabbed Cassian's hand. Feyre, in her free time, had been teaching Nesta how to winnow. The eldest sister became adept at it rather quickly and could even carry Cassian along with her over great distances.
Together, they winnowed away to the Autumn Court.
....................
A thrum of voices chattering around him was the first sensation Azriel perceived as his shadows dissipated and left him standing in an area of woods on the outskirts of the Forest House.
The next sensation to follow was an aroma of smoked meat, spun sugar, and baked pastries.
Surrounding him, and stretching out as far as he could see, were merchant stands and food stalls. There seemed to be no coordination with how the stalls were organized. They were dotted randomly throughout the woods, the sea of stands interspersed with giant oak trees that comprised this section of the forest.
Waves of people bustled around him, side-stepping the obstacle of his body in order to reach their next destination.
He snapped his wings tight into him to avoid any unwanted contact.
Azriel looked over the heads of the fae surrounding him to try and locate Mor, Nesta, and Cassian. There had to be thousands here. His eyesight found no end to the mass of people.
At last, he spotted the three of them already together a few hundred paces away, ogling the vendors. He made his way over and heard the last snatch of what Mor was saying.
"- seen these only in Montesere." Her voice was filled with awe.
They were huddled around a table laden with glazed pottery. Plates, mugs, and bowls all painted with rich, vibrant jewel tones.
"Eris reached out to a few territories on the continent to invite local artisans to come sell their wares at this year's Mabon," Azriel confirmed, sidling up beside Mor. "With Calanmai being... not what it used to...with everything going on with Tamlin...Eris is trying to pick up some of the slack."
Mor's face twisted in surprise at his words.
"And I think he's trying to set a good precedent. After all, Beron only allowed upper-class and high fae craftsmen to set up booths here and apparently he even took a cut of their sales," Azriel scoffed out. "Eris didn't limit who could participate this year. He told me a lot of local lesser fae farmers are coming and selling excess crop from the growing season that just concluded- I think he might've gone a bit overboard with how many he's permitted though."
Mor nodded silently, smirking in amusement at him.
Realizing how much he'd just prattled on about Eris and his booths, Azriel felt his face heat up.
He focused his attention of the pottery in front of him, suddenly very interested in inspecting the intricacy of the handiwork.
Azriel pointedly avoided Nesta's stare that was burning a hole through his head. He had easily just proved wrong his statement earlier about how close him and the High Lord had become.
"So...is that where Eris lives?" Nesta's attention had shifted away from him and she was turned around, pointing to the Forest House in the distance. It's oppressive size seemed to have stunned her. Azriel knew from experience that it took around three hours to get from one side to the other, having done the entire walk with Eris a few months ago.
Azriel shook his head, refusing to foolishly prattle on again and reveal precisely how entrenched in Eris's life he really was.
"From what Azriel's told me, he now lives in the High Lord's manor. It has sat vacant since his grandfather. I think it's somewhere on the other side of the Forest House," Mor fills in for him. "Though from the crowd that's gathered around the south entrance, I'm assuming Eris is likely over there now."
Indeed, there was a massive congregation of people milling around the wide, stone stairs that led up to the grand south entrance of the Forest House. The massive wooden doors at the top landing were thrown open. Though due to the row of guards flanking the stairs and entryway doors, Azriel couldn't make out if Eris was up there.
It hit him then.
The hundreds of fae gathered around the steps, the thousands more that wandered through the festival, the countless guards and sentries patrolling the area- they were all here for Eris. Eris Vanserra, the bane of Azriel's immortal existence, the High Lord of Autumn. Eris was a High Lord now; no longer a pestering lordling with dreams brighter than his own damn hair.
Azriel knew this, of course, had been working one-on-one with Eris for months to help ease the transition into his new role. But being here, it all felt more real.
The Eris he played chess with last week in the study of his manor home while they drank out of a shared bottle of wine was the same High Lord who now ruled the court he stood in and drew the crowd of thousands surrounding him. The same High Lord who seemed to already have the admiration and respect of many, given the throng waiting to greet him.
The crowd awaiting Eris seemed to be largely comprised of females, no doubt hoping to be the lucky maiden selected to help him complete the Great Rite that began after sundown.
Azriel's shadows thrashed around him at the thought.
"Well, let's go get the greetings over with. One of Eris's weasly guards probably already informed him of our arrival," Mor said bluntly, stepping away from the table of pottery.
Azriel steeled himself with a breath and dropped into step next to her as the four of them weaved their way through the festival-goers and headed for the south entrance steps.
He was thankful for the push of the crowd that slowed their journey down.
A wave of anxiety flooded through Azriel, causing his stomach to clench. His lungs wouldn't expand to take a full breath and it was making his surroundings spin. He felt like he was standing on the precipice of a battle that he was guaranteed to lose.
Why was he nervous?
Azriel willed his centuries of training to take over and took a deep breath to release the tension that seized him.
He pulled at the high-neck collar of his jacket, hoping to loosen it. It felt like a leash growing tighter with every step he took towards the Forest House.
Eris was going to mock the jacket, he was sure of it. He was going to call Azriel 'a want-to-be Autumn aristocrat fool', he never should have let Mor dress him in this.
He just hated seeing Eris. Hated the male's all-knowing gaze that could tear through Azriel's defenses without a thought. Mor, Cassian, and Nesta were going to see it. They were going to see the way Eris could pick him apart and expose a layer of Azriel he never showed. They were going to witness first-hand just how much the Autumn High Lord affected him.
As they reached the rear of the crowd huddled around the bottom of the staircase, Azriel's eyes darted around the top trying to spot the High Lord.
He couldn't see him. Where was he? Was something wrong?
And as much as he was dreading speaking to the male, his absence made Azriel's stomach drop even further.
His mind whirled with unexplainable anxiety.
He needed the Cauldron-damned crowd to get out of his way so he could get up there and see if something was wrong.
Fae tended to retreat willingly away from Azriel. His oppressive height, writhing shadows, and intimidating wingspan conveyed what he usually didn't need words for. It seemed the prospect of catching sight of the new Autumn High Lord distracted the fae in front of him enough that none marked his presence behind them.
"Move," Azriel's deep, menacing voice broke through the thrum of sound. He felt no inclination to add pleasantries to his request.
As the fae closest heard him, they turned to look at the source of the sound and scrambled back at the sight of him.
With ease, Azriel marched through the pathway that opened for him and led Mor, Nesta, and Cassian to the stairs.
Five flights made up the grand entrance and by the second landing Azriel still couldn't catch sight of Eris.
Desperation quickened his pace.
At last he reached the third landing, coming into view of the palatial wooden doors of the Forest House thrown open at the top. And there he was.
Eris.
A full breath of air whooshed into Azriel's lungs as he finally gazed upon the High Lord.
Eris's beauty was undeniable. It was almost laughable the way he made everyone around him look simple. A God stood amongst fae-kind.
In the afternoon sun, Eris's hair glowed like living flames; the ends of those fiery locks pushed back behind his pointed ears. Those very ears were adorned with a handful of small golden hoops in the upper cartilage, drawing Azriel's eye to trace along their curve.
His beautiful, wicked face was twisted into a wry grin in reaction to whomever he was speaking to. Azriel couldn't tear his eyes away from the High Lord to check. With his unmarred porcelain skin, Eris appeared to have been carved from marble.
Azriel's eyes continued their journey down the slope of Eris's neck, taking his time to trace its length. He was surprised Eris couldn't feel his gaze burning into him.
The male wore a billowing white silk shirt whose neck hung open to reveal a hint of the muscled chest that lay underneath. He wondered what more lay unexposed. The shirt was tucked into a pair of dark, well-tailored pants- very well-tailored pants.
On top of his ensemble, Eris donned a cloak whose hemmed reached to the bottom of his boots. The garment was a rich, velvety maroon, with gold details running down the sides of the opening.
Perfectly put together as always. Eris was skilled at wielding clothes like a weapon, he always knew how to arm himself properly for the occasion. And today he looked so damn regal and powerful, commanding the attention of everyone around him.
As if finally registering the weight of his observation, Eris turned and caught sight of Azriel and the others.
A wide smile broke across Eris's face.
Azriel's head whipped around to look behind himself. Who the hell was Eris smiling at? Mor? Nesta? Had someone else followed them up the stairs?
Cassian and the two females had come to a stop behind Azriel, no longer ascending the stairs.
When had he stopped walking?
Azriel looked back and the smile that had cut across Eris's face was gone. The male was now biting his lower lip, keeping it still.
Cassian gave him a push from behind before sliding around Azriel to take the lead with Nesta.
"Let's go you fool," his brother said to him gruffly.
The shove and command from his brother broke Azriel out of his reverie. It must be the magic of Mabon that entranced Azriel when he was regarding Eris. The magic flows most acutely through the High Lord after all. Azriel had become as spell bound as the hoard of fae below him.
Azriel resumed his climb, drawing nearer and nearer to Eris.
As Cassian reached the final landing ahead of him and approached Eris, Azriel heard the High Lord say in greeting, "Well, if it isn't my favorite court. Behind the four others. I'll be generous and put Tamlin at the bottom of my ranking."
Still an asshole. A beautiful asshole.
"You're look very pretty today. I like what that jacket does for your eyes." Azriel chuckled at his brother's words. Cassian had learned well how to get under Eris's skin.
Eris sneered at him, not responding, before turning his gaze to Nesta. His expression lightened as he looked to her. "Nesta, you do yourself no favors with the company you keep."
To Azriel's surprise, Cassian chuckled good-naturedly at the High Lord's remark.
"It's lovely to see you again, Eris." replied Nesta, politely. "I think you might be right. I find myself occasionally regretting my refusal of your proposal."
Eris nodded his head in the mockery of a bow before replying sarcastically, "At your earliest convenience Lady Archeron, I will eagerly make you my bride." His eyes glittered with derision.
Nesta chuckled, curtseying before Eris, before grabbing Cassian's hand and pulling him out of the way.
Eris shifted his attention to Mor. "Morrigan, I must say I did not anticipate your appearance today."
"Eris," Mor nodded in greeting. "It's been a while since my last visit."
Visit is not how Azriel would categorize it.
She continued, "I wanted to reacquaint myself with the court and I heard," her eyes shot to Azriel, "that this event was not to be missed."
Azriel's face twisted. He said no such thing.
"Hmm," Eris hummed as his gaze quickly darted to Azriel, "Well I'm happy you could attend. I hope everything is up to your standards."
Perfectly cordial, the two of them. They had come such a long way.
Mor gave no reply before bowing out of the way.
She turned to Azriel, squeezed his arm and said quietly, "We'll wait for you at the bottom of the steps."
Why? He didn't voice the question aloud.
He turned to face Eris who was glaring pointedly at the spot on Azriel's arm that Mor just touched.
Azriel stood in silence, waiting. After a moment, Eris's stare rose to his.
"Azriel."
"Eris."
More silence.
Eris's gaze darted down Azriel's frame, taking him in.
With surprise lacing his tone, the High Lord said, "Your jacket... I like it."
Azriel's brows shot up his face.
"The color. It suits you. I don't think I've ever seen you in something other than black. I appreciate that you made an effort with my court's style," Eris added on. Genuine sincerity shone in his face.
Azriel merely nodded in thanks.
A slight weight lifted off of Azriel's chest at the High Lord's words. Why did he give a damn what Eris thought about his clothing? It was humiliating. Why did he have this irritating need to impress him, to get his approval?
Azriel wanted to run away from the knowing glint in Eris's eye, the ghost of the smirk that danced on his lips, like he knew exactly the effect his comments would have on Azriel.
Planning to do just that, Azriel spun on his heels angling to catch up with the rest of his companions who already reached the bottom of the staircase.
"Wait." Eris's voice stopped Azriel in his descent.
The Illyrian turned to look up at the High Lord who now descended the few steps Azriel was able to make.
Eris came to a stop on the same stair as Azriel. They were eye level. How had Azriel never realized the two of them were the same height? Perhaps it was due to Eris's new commanding presence, it was now impossible not to be aware of every detail about the High Lord. Azriel tried desperately to tamp down the flush in his cheeks.
Eris continued on, cool confidence lacing his tone, "I'm heading out to tour the vendors, would you join me?"
A lifetime of stoicism is the only thing that kept Azriel from reacting visibly.
There was a crowd of people waiting to meet the High Lord. More dignitaries were set to arrive, surely Eris had to wait to greet them.
But Eris was looking at him with such an earnest expression that Azriel couldn't find it in himself to care about what duties of his might take precedence.
"Is that... a request or a command, High Lord?" Azriel responded after a moment, keeping his features neutral.
Eris's eyes narrowed slightly.
"A command. I don't want you off on your own scaring away all my visitors"
Laughter broke from Azriel's mouth before he could catch it.
The corner of Eris's mouth quirked up in satisfaction.
That wouldn't do.
"No, thank you." That should humble the High Lord. Azriel took off down the flight of steps at a much quicker pace this time.
Silence. And then, "No?!" Eris called after him.
The smack of boots against stone rang out as Azriel heard Eris follow him.
Azriel made it down two flights, nearly halfway to the bottom, before Eris caught up. He could see Mor, Cassian, and Nesta looking up at them from below.
Eris grabbed his arm. His cheeks were flushed and eyes a bit wild as he demanded, "You really won't come with me?"
His arm tingled under the hand grasping it.
"Ask nicely."
Eris huffed out an exasperated laugh.
"-Azriel!" That was Mor's voice this time from two flights below.
He could see Eris's face bunch up in frustration. The grip on his forearm tightened infinitesimally.
She called up at him, "I promised Emerie I'd get her something so I'm going to go look around. Alright?"
Azriel nodded in understanding. It was then that he realized Nesta and Cassian had already peeled away and were reentering the thick bustle of the festival.
At his assent, Mor followed after them.
His attention returned to Eris.
"Azriel. Would you please join me?"
He was quiet for a moment, before, "Yes... what about them?" He nodded at the throng waiting for Eris.
The hand on him gripped hard and then Eris was winnowing them in a spark of heat and light.
..........................
They reappeared on the outskirts of the Forest House's northern side. A few hours walk from their last location.
The festival stands and crowds were sparser here. But in a small field of grass close to the northern entrance of the estate, a group of children were playing. Squeals of delight rang in Azriel's ear as the children ran around, tossing a ball between themselves. His shadows jumped at the shrill noises, darting out as if they'd investigate.
A pleasant, carefree atmosphere hung in the air.
"It's so... different here now," Azriel said carefully.
So different from Beron.
Eris hummed quietly in confirmation at Azriel's words. He wistfully watched the children play. "Rhysand once advised me that change is slow in our world and to prepare myself accordingly. I've personally found that it's only slow if you don't care to try hard enough."
Azriel's eyes narrowed at the slight jab to his brother.
Eris pulled his attention from the children and dropped his hand from where it still wrapped around Azriel's forearm. Azriel hadn't registered it was there but the cold it's absence left in its wake sent a shudder down his spine.
Leaves crunched under the heels of their boots as the pair walked leisurely into the festival.
"You think you care more than Rhys? Care more about your court?" The comment rubbed Azriel the wrong way, he couldn't let it go.
"I think Rhysand cares an awful lot about Velaris. I know he sacrificed greatly to keep them safe from Amarantha. But a High Lord's duty is to the well-being of everyone in his court, not just those he favors."
Azriel stopped in his tracks. "Don't speak about it as if you have any idea."
"Don't I?" Eris said, stopping with him. His brow quirked up on his face. "Aren't I one of the few that can now judge him?"
"You know nothing of the Night Court. Since when were you an advocate for the rights of Illyrians?"
"It's not the Illyrians about which I'm concerned."
Azriel's mouth dropped slightly, "The Court of Nightmares? You can't be serious. Keir has gotten to you."
Eris whooshed out a frustrated breath. "Keir is a pest. But he's not the only one that lives there. You forget that I have experience at Hewn City, not only now, but from before."
Rhys had snuck Cassian and Azriel into Hewn City earlier that morning. It was the first time Azriel had been anywhere but the steppes of Illyria.
His shadows writhed over his wings, something in the bowels of the mountain called to them.
The three of them stood a few hundred paces from the entrance to the Court of Nightmare's receiving hall.
She was in there. Mor.
She was in there with Keir getting introduced to her new captors, the Vanserras.
It was the reason for Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel's visit today. Mor would never admit it, that beautiful, proud female, but Azriel knew she was terrified for the encounter. He had practically begged on his knees for Rhys to take them there so they could keep an eye on her.
The grand obsidian doors that kept Mor from view creaked open suddenly, startlingly the three males.
They stood straight, imbuing confidence into their features. Despite being barely of age, the three of them refused to cower under the presence of Keir and the Autum High Lord.
Beron Vanserra exited first, Keir keeping at heels like an overexcited dog. Pathetic.
A few paces behind was Mor, eyes blazing as she kept her stare straight forward. And there he was.
Eris.
His cruel, cold beauty matched his reputation.
The second Azriel laid eyes on him, he felt a searing hatred for the male tear through his chest.
Azriel had hated before; hated his father, his half-brothers, the camp lords that shunned him. That hatred had been iced-cold, settling inside him like a stone. It followed him everywhere and pushed him to work harder, fight harder.
What he felt now, staring at the Autumn male before him, was a passion so bright it ached deep inside him. It set his blood on fire.
As if sensing Azriel's glare, the princeling's eyes slid over to him. Eris's mouth parted slightly, eyes widening, as he looked at him. The shadows often taken people by surprise.
Azriel sneered at him before tearing his eyes away to look at Mor. As she passed Azriel, she gave him a reassuring nod. She was alright.
He shot her a gentle smile in return.
He kept his attention on her as she walked away but had the odd sensation of another stare burning into him.
"I don't think you went there more than once," Azriel scoffed.
"I was enough."
"Enough for what?" Azriel grew exasperated.
"Enough to see that Mor was not the only young female desperate to escape that prison. She was just the only one that had a lifeline out of there. Rhysand condemns everyone in there for the crimes of their ancestors. For the crimes of Keir and his ilk. I know monsters lurk in every shadow corner of that gods-forsaken place but it's Rhysand's responsibility to not abandon those that need help. Who want something better."
That immediately shut Azriel up. He looked to Eris's face and saw a passionate fury on it, saw a look of someone who related intimately to about that which they spoke.
"Perhaps you're right." Damning words from Azriel's mouth. But today was not the day to delve into it, to process just how much a part Azriel played in keeping those people trapped within the confines of the Court of Nightmares.
A slight burst of guilt churned his stomach.
Eris observed him with an understanding he didn't deserve.
"Anyway," Eris shifted the topic onwards, "I am hungry." He made a show of looking around the booths around them as they walked. "What interests you?"
Azriel shrugged noncommittally. "Whatever doesn't have a line."
"Why would I want the food that doesn't have a line. Don't you think that would suggest it's not worth eating."
Azriel rolled his eyes and said, "Nothing can be that bad. Food is food."
"Very well. But if it is bad you still need to eat it all." Eris said and took off towards a food stand that stood patron-less.
As the two of them approached, the man standing behind the stand's counter eye's widened. A High Lord and an Illyrian shadowsinger marching towards you was likely an intimidating sight.
A basin of cooking oil bubbled away behind the stall, lit by a large fire kindled underneath. On a small table next to it two trays were filled; one with a rough flour mixture and one with beaten, uncooked eggs. A container full of wooden skewers sat next to it. On the ground, off to the side was an ice-box whose lid was firmly shut.
"My lord!" The stall's operator rose from his stool and gave Eris a sweeping bow.
He then merely jerked his head at Azriel, saying nothing. A look of contempt flashed across Eris's face at that.
Eris shook the look off his face and smiled stiltedly in greeting to the vendor. "We are looking for food, sir. What are you making here today?"
"Amazing," the vendor exclaimed, "I am the premier maker of fried Autumn frogs!"
Azriel watched Eris's brows shoot up his forehead.
That explained the lack of line.
Now that Azriel looked, he saw a crudely painted wooden sign depicting a frog skewered onto a stick. He should've been paying better attention on their approach.
"Wonderful." Even centuries of courtier skills couldn't stop the trepidation from slipping into Eris's voice.
"We-," Eris darted his eyes over to Azriel and he could see a dark humor glittering on the High Lord's face, "We will take three, please, one for me and two for my friend. He's very hungry."
Azriel stomped on the male's foot as soon as the vendor turned to start preparing their order.
"Food is food," the High Lord whispered at him, wincing in pain at his foot.
"I'm not even hungry," the Illyrian hissed back.
"Too bad, you are now." The High Lord chuckled at his own antics.
They stood there waiting for their food. Azriel scowled as he watched the frogs get dipped in the batter and then dunked into bubbling oil.
He was deeply regretting his earlier statement.
Eris slid a few silver marks onto the stall's table as Azriel grabbed two of the skewers from the vendor. He'd let Eris grab his own.
The pair strolled away, eyeing the food in their hands.
Azriel gulped before braving a small bite from the fried meat. He swallowed roughly.
"So?" Eris questioned.
Azriel contemplated for a moment before replying, "It's... not that bad." He went in for a second bite.
Following his approval, Eris raised his own skewer to his mouth and took a sizable bite.
The High Lord's face dropped at the taste that met him. His stare burned through Azriel with fury as he slowly chewed and swallowed the large bite that was in his mouth.
Azriel threw his head back roaring with laughter.
Eris chucked the food into a nearby trash bin, "That. was. disgusting," he seethed. "Why did you say it was good."
"You deserved it you ass." Azriel threw his skewers into the bin as well.
"It was sour!?"
Azriel continued to laugh.
Eris's eyes softened imperceptibly as he looked down at Azriel's smile. It sent a jolt through Azriel's system.
The two of them wandered on, appetite gone.
They stopped at many stalls along their walk. Eris thumbed through heavy, fur garments on display from a Winter Court seamstress. Azriel weighed and handled Raskian throwing knives brought from a merchant on the continent. The pair chuckled at a table that displayed men's silk undershorts, saying they were going to send a collection to Helion. Eris grimaced when Azriel reminded him his mother would be on the receiving end of the silk shorts, the male's amusement dissipated immediately. Azriel had to drag Eris away from buying a dozen handmade leather collars for his hounds. Eris did end up buying a thin silver chain bracelet from a local Autumn crasftwoman. It was made from a metal found only in this court, Eris told him, and the metal is the only known deterrent to the fire magic the flowed through the blood of Autumn court fae.
"It's incredibly hard to find, near impossible to forge into something wearable, and gods-damned expensive as a result. I can't explain to you how it works, just that it'll lessen the effect of fire magic on the wearer. The Mother balances all things she creates."
Eris pivoted towards him and in the blink of an eye clipped the bracelet around Azriel's own wrist. It sat right below where the scars on his hand faded into unmarred skin.
Azriel gaped at the High Lord.
"Well it's not like I need it," Eris said in response to his expression. "I am the Lord of fire. It's not exactly going to hurt me."
Fluttering ignited within Azriel's chest, it tickled along his ribs.
"Will it protect me from you?" He meant the question to sound coy but it came across strained.
Flames flickered in Eris's irises as he said, "Nothing could stop me from reaching you, Azriel."
Azriel's heart ponded painfully within him. "Your fire, you mean?"
"Yes, my fire." The flames in his eyes shuttered and he took a step away.
They strolled on.
It was impossible to miss the way passersby looked at Eris. Hunger. Longing.
It reminded Azriel that nightfall was rapidly approaching, only two hours away. The notion saddened him.
"How does tonight work. For you?" questioned Azriel, although he wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer.
Eris smirked in amusement at him, "When two people are attracted to one another, Azriel, they do something called-"
"You ass," he growled, cutting Eris off, "What's the ritual? I know Calanmai has a cave, Summer a beach cove, Winter... I don't know- a glacier? What's the landmark of choice for Autumn."
"A tree."
"A tree?"
"Yes. A tree. Don't give me that look, I didn't pick it. There's a large oak tree at the center of Autumn, I'm told it's been there since the court's creation. It's said to be the center, the beating heart, of all magic here. A load of nonsense but it's tradition at this point. I've seen it a few times. It's this massive thing, so large that a hundred people wouldn't be enough to line its entire perimeter. According to my father, it's hollow inside. I'm not sure how that works out. There's ancient wards around the oak that only allow the High Lord to approach or winnow inside the tree. And that- that is where the magic happens." Literally and figuratively.
"A magic sex tree?" Azriel said crudely.
"It's no worse than a magic sex cave. Certainly better than a glacier. Or snow bank. We should really find out what it is in Winter."
"Well I feel bad for whatever poor female gets chosen for you tonight. She has your company and a floor of dirt to look forward to." Bitterness laced Azriel's words and he hoped it sounded like contempt for the High Lord.
"Don't sound too jealous now, Azriel." The fire was back raging in the High Lord's eyes, "After all, no one said it had to be a female."
Azriel couldn't help it as his attention dropped down to Eris's full lips at the words. Dropped to look at the High Lord's muscled body hidden beneath his clothing. Azriel wondered what his skin tasted like, if it was sweet and woodsy like the cinnamon and sandalwood that wafted on his scent.
"Unfortunately," Azriel choked out, "I will not be here to see the lucky chosen person. Female or male."
"What?" Eris sounded frantic.
"I'm not staying. Mor and I are leaving before nightfall. Nesta and Cassian are the only ones remaining."
Eris stared at him, eyes wide, searching Azriel's face. "Are you serious? You're leaving? Why did you come?"
"You invited us. Mor was adamant on coming and I didn't want her to come alone, Nesta and Cassian aren't much for company." It was a lie, one that Azriel spouted again.
"Then where is your precious Morrigan?" Eris made a show of looking around them.
"I'm here if she needs me."
"You really came here only for her?" Devastation etched across Eris's face. Azriel refused to read into the expression but his shadows were jumping around him, slithering out as if they wanted to wipe that look off the High Lord's face.
"Why do you care anyway? What's it to you if I stay and find some stranger to fuck in the woods and add a little magic to your Great Rite. It doesn't interest me." The words were a barrier to hide the war raging inside Azriel; to hide the feelings ripping away inside of him desperate to get out.
Eris looked away from him and stared up into the vibrant canopy of leaves above them. The setting sun shone down through the branches, making his fair skin glow. He seemed to be counting every leaf on the oak that towered over them. As Eris got lost in the scenery above them, Azriel took a moment to map out every detail of his face.
Eventually Eris said, voice controlled, "You're right, I don't care. I'll be preoccupied with someone else anyway."
Eris glared at him, staring deep into his soul, as if he could see the animal that went wild inside of Azriel at his words.
They walked for an hour longer, finally approaching the south entrance again. Their conversation was noticeably more stilted.
The disgust from the fried frogs had abated but Azriel found he was no longer hungry for an entirely different reason.
The sun was cresting the horizon. Soon it would set completely and the Great Rite would begin. He could feel the magic thrumming in the air, ready to break free from the confines restricting it.
He looked at Eris next to him. The High Lord looked agitated, twitchy. The magic must be beating away at him as the Rite's beginning drew nearer.
Now that he had his gaze on him, Azriel couldn't look away. There was a magnet inside of him drawing him closer as if its match was inside the High Lord. He understood now why people went mad during Great Rites, this heady sensation made him want to disregard all expectations and let loose. Azriel wanted to lean in and taste the sweat beading up on Eris's skin.
Unknowingly, Azriel had taken a few steps closer to Eris who darted his attention over to him. He wanted to keep those amber eyes on him- didn't want anyone else to come in between them. He wanted to feel Eris's burning palms running along the skin under his jacket. Wanted to feel those lips against his neck, sucking marks for everyone to see.
Azriel needed him. He couldn't let anyone else have him- not tonight.
He was going to tell him as such, "I-"
"Azriel!"
The call from Mor broke through the haze Azriel was lost in.
"What? Azriel, what?" Eris grabbed him by his jacket bringing his attention towards the High Lord again.
Azriel wanted to step into the fire inside of Eris's eyes and burn.
"Azriel" Mor's hand clamped down on his shoulder as she said his name a second time.
He turned to look at her.
"It's nearly nightfall, we should go. I'm feeling pretty drained, do you think you can winnow both of us back? I don't think I can make it the entire way?" she looked up at him expectantly.
He needed to go. He couldn't leave her here alone. He looked back at Eris.
The High Lord looked like he was seconds from dropping to his knees to beg Azriel to stay. The hand holding his jacket twisted tighter.
"What were you going to say, Azriel?" Eris sounded manic.
"I need to go, Eris"
"Yes. Okay." He looked crestfallen. His hand still gripped Azriel's jacket.
"You need to let go."
The High Lord actually shook his head no in response to that.
"Of the jacket. You need to let go of my jacket." Azriel felt like his heart was ripping out of his chest. Desire was swallowing him whole.
He at last dropped his hand away.
Azriel spun on his heels, grabbed Mor, and winnowed away without glancing back.
.…........................
Azriel bid Mor goodnight in the dimly lit foyer of the River House and dazedly made his way up to his room on the second floor of the home. Dropping onto the foot of his bed, he propped his elbows on his knees, stuffed the heels of his hands into his eyes and pressed so hard that a constellation of lights popped into his vision.
He needed to get up. He needed to fly. He needed to lay down. He needed to get drunk. He needed to go to sleep. He needed to scream until there was nothing left in him. He needed to curl up and cry.
There was an animal inside of him clawing to get out, ripping at his chest so hard he swore he could feel it tearing underneath his ribs.
What was wrong with him?
After a few minutes there was a knock on his door and Azriel jolted up from the hunched position he'd been in.
Peering in through the cracked doorway was Mor. When she met his gaze, she gently swung the door open the rest of the way. It was silent for a moment as she looked over him as he remained sitting on the foot of the bed.
"You should go back", Mor whispered delicately into the depth of the room.
Azriel's brows furrowed. He just stared at her, tried to read her expression. There was nothing but quiet contemplation on her beautiful face.
"You should go back", she repeated, simply. Mor's assessing gaze tore into him. He could feel the truth she wielded cutting through him as they looked at one another.
Azriel said nothing. Couldn't choke out the words and only shook his head.
Mor at last entered the room fully and crossed over to where he remained sitting.
She gently grasped his face between both of her hands and angled him up to look at her. Her fingers were delicate and soft against his skin as her thumbs stroked short arcs soothingly against his cheeks. There was a time that he would've killed for a touch like this from her.
Now all Azriel could think about is what the same touch would feel like under wider, stronger, warmer palms. If there were fiery amber eyes looking back at him instead of warm brown ones.
His eyes pricked at the thought and he attempted to duck out of Mor's grip, cowering at the weight of everything he felt.
"You're the one who asked me to leave with you. Why should I go back," he asked her, staring at the tile underneath her shoes.
"I wanted you to have a few moments alone, away from the Rite's magic so you could clear your head and think without it influencing you."
His shook his head again, "I don't want to go back."
"Yes you do. You know you do."
"I don't want to want to go back." He looked back up at her.
"You don't need to be afraid of it anymore, Azriel. We love you, every part of you. No matter what you choose." This was the Morrigan of Truth who spoke to him now. The fae who saw every facet of the world around her with uncharacteristic clarity.
She didn't elaborate before heading back out of Azriel's room and down the hall. She left his door open.
Azriel sat there. He counted to a hundred before standing up and hurtling out the door and down the stairs. He rushed out into the front courtyard, made his way to the ward boundaries and winnowed away in a swirl of shadows.
.…........................
The hum of a crowd didn't meet him this time as his feet touched down in the Autumn court for the second time that day. The buzzing of insects and the rustling of wind blowing through leaves were the only sounds that kept him company.
He didn't recognize the land where his pesky shadows deposited him. He intended to go back to the same spot he originally left.
He felt, more than he heard, someone winnow into existence behind him.
Azriel drew his blade and spun around, expecting to find an attacker awaiting him.
It was Eris.
His hand holding the knife went limp and dropped down in shock.
"How did you find me so quickly?" he asked.
"I could find you anywhere you go, Azriel."
His name was butter in the High Lord's mouth. He wanted to grab Eris and taste the tongue that said his name like that.
"You came back." Eris's pupils were blown wide as he looked Azriel up and down. He'd become a creature of the Rite, the power making him more monster than male.
Azriel's blood rushed in his ears in response.
"I did."
"Why?"
"Why do you think?"
"I need to hear you say it." The male clawed back control to ask that question. To hear Azriel give his consent.
Azriel let him stew in silence, driving Eris mad. He was nervous to let the words out of his mouth.
Growing impatient, Eris said, "Azriel."
"I want you... Eris. I want this. I want you."
With a groan at his words, Eris rushed to Azriel and slammed his lips into his.
The first press of Eris's lips against his own was like a lightning strike. It made Azriel's skin burst to life with the power of it.
Azriel slid his hands into the silky red strands of the male and held him close. He angled the male's head to the side to deepen the glide of their lips along one another.
Eris's hands, which had gripped his waist, moved down underneath Azriel's jacket to brush along the skin of his lower back. His hands burned a path along Azriel's skin, just how he imagined they would. At the sensation, Azriel let out a small groan.
Eris used the opportunity to slide his tongue into Azriel's mouth. His tongue stroked along Azriel's own, sending a shiver of desire down his spine.
The taste of Eris was better than he ever expected; it made him feel high. He barely drew a breath, not wanting to part from Eris's mouth for more than a second. His taste was more gratifying than air.
Azriel pressed his front into Eris until they were fully flush, his hardness pressing into the other male's own.
"Azriel, fuck," Eris backed away for a moment to murmur on his lips. "I need- I need-," he didn't finish that thought before leaning in to give more sucking kisses to Azriel's bottom lip.
A broken groan escaped Azriel as the High Lord bit down on his lower lip, his cock growing harder in his pants.
Eris pulled off him again and grabbed Azriel's face between his hands to keep him still. That didn't stop Azriel from chasing his lips for more.
"Have you been with a male before?" Eris asked him.
"I'm 545 years old, Eris, of course I've fucked males."
Eris growled at the statement, eyes blazing. He grabbed Azriel's ass and dragged him back in for a few moments.
Panting to catch his breath, Eris said, "That's not what I mean." He squeezed his ass for emphasis.
Oh.
No, he hadn't. Not that it didn't appeal to him but he could never give someone control of him like that. But looking at Eris, into the face of the male he'd grown to know so well the past year, Azriel didn't feel the same trepidation that tended to hold him back. Azriel realized that he actually trusted Eris. He wondered when that happened.
"I want to." With you, only with you. He hoped his eyes conveyed the truth he wouldn't speak.
Eris leaned in and gave Azriel a gentle kiss before winnowing them away.
They reappeared inside the hollow of a massive tree. It must've been the oak Eris spoke about before.
It smelled mossy and the air was damp inside the trunk. As Azriel predicated, only dirt lined the floor.
Eris conjured a couple faelights that rose above them and sent a gentle glow cascading down upon the pair.
There was a beat thrumming in the air. It pounded so loud through Azriel that he felt his heart skip to match its beat. The sound made his head swim with a heady sensation.
He saw Eris in front of him similarly affected.
His gaze dropped to see tenting at the front of Eris's pants. His wings twitched with the arousal that flooded him in response. He needed him. Now.
Always knowing what was on Azriel's mind, Eris hooked a finger through one of Azriel's belt loops and dragged him back toward him.
Instead of his mouth, this time Eris ran his lips down Azriel's throat. They were delicate kisses that sent goosebumps over Azriel's arm. The male seemed to be savoring the pounding of Azriel's pulse beneath him. When he reached the soft hollow between his neck and shoulder, Eris sucked hard.
Azriel's knees buckled beneath him. Only Eris's strong arms supporting him kept Azriel up as the High Lord laid claim to the sensitive spot.
Azriel shoved at the coat draped around Eris's shoulders. The maroon garment thudded to the dirt floor with success.
Once that was gone, Azriel slid his hands under Eris's silk white shirt and traced along his back and chest. Though Eris was leaner than him, shapely muscle lay underneath his clothes. He had been general of Autumn for close to five centuries, the training required for that now showed in the strong chest and abdomen that Azriel's fingers ghosted down.
Eris moved on to sucking a matching mark on the other side of his neck. Azriel's head fell to the side as he let out a low, deep whine at the sensation.
"You taste so good," the High Lord whispered into his skin.
Azriel rolled his hips against Eris's in a desperate search for friction. Eris snapped his fingers and the entirety of both the males' clothes disappeared.
A wobbling sound left his mouth as he took in the sight of the naked male against him. Eris's muscled, pale chest and long lean legs made his mouth water. He wanted to taste every inch of him. He pushed Eris to the ground and did just that.
Azriel nipped and sucked down the male's chest, leaving marks and savoring the taste of his skin. He paused when he reached Eris's cock. Where Azriel was long, Eris was thick.
He bent down aiming to take him in his mouth when he was stopped.
"No." Eris's chest was heaving. "I can't- don't want to finish yet. If you take me in your mouth, this'll be over far too quick."
Azriel smirked, leaning down to lick a long stripe up the underside of him anyway before leaning back on his knees.
Eris followed him up and pushed him down onto his back. The male settled between Azriel's legs and looked down at him.
"Is this okay for your wings?"
Azriel never let his wings get trapped like this. In his centuries of taking lovers, would only ever be on top. But the sight of Eris above him made his cock twitch and blood heat, and Azriel knew it was alright.
"It's fine."
Spurred on by his confirmation, Eris bent down and took Azriel in his mouth without preamble.
Azriel shouted a groan at the warm sensation of Eris's mouth around him. He worked Azriel slowly, tongue dragging along him. Eris was looking at him, watching his every reaction with blazing eyes.
After a minute, Azriel started to feel a tightening in his lower stomach. He was already so close.
Just then, Eris's hand that rested on his thigh, slid over to press into the area beneath Azriel's balls. Questioning eyes looked to him and Azriel nodded his approval.
A bottle of oil appeared out of thin air into Eris's other hand and Azriel felt a zap of cleaning magic rush through him. Convenient.
Eris pulled away to pour oil onto the fingers of his right hand. After slicking them up, Eris grabbed one of Azriel's thighs and pushed it up out of the way. He then ducked down and took Azriel in his mouth again while gently pressing the tip of his pointer finger against Azriel's hole.
The Illyrian let out a choppy moan and the High Lord slowly pressed his entire, long finger into him. It was a weird sensation. Neither pleasant or unpleasant, just new. Eris's mouth continued to move up and down him, keeping the pleasure stable. After a few seconds Eris moved the finger within him, steadily withdrawing and pushing back in.
Azriel relaxed around the finger after a few moments and felt Eris's middle finger push in to join it. He hissed at the slight burning sensation that went with it. The High Lord shot him an apologetic look.
Both fingers pressed in all the way together and repeated the same cycle of moving slowly to loosen Azriel up. The only noises were the sounds of Eris's mouth on his cock, the slide of the fingers inside him, and the gentle moans coming from his mouth. As Azriel once again relaxed around the fingers, Eris pulled off him.
He gave Azriel a wicked smirk before curling his fingers up and brushing along a spot that he hadn't yet touched. Azriel's legs spasmed at the jolt of pleasure that shot through him.
"Gods, what was that." he moaned out.
"You must not have been pleasuring those male's very well if you don't know what that is, Azriel."
Eris started thrusting his two fingers harder inside of him, keeping steady pressure on the spot.
Azriel threw his head back, moaning loudly.
Eris pushed a third slicked finger in. The burning only heightened his pleasure this time.
Azriel drew his second leg up as Eris rammed his three fingers into him, no longer taking Azriel in his mouth. He didn't need it. The High Lord's fingers alone felt amazing.
Azriel's hole eased around the three fingers and was taking a fourth appendage in no time. He felt stretched so wide. The amount of fingers Eris had stuffed into him allowed him to brush roughly against that spot every time. Knees drawn up, Azriel's eyes rolled back into his head as he laid there getting fingered by the High Lord. His hands clenched at the ground above his head.
The drums of the Great Rite thrummed around them. The sound clanged in Azriel's ears. The closer he got to finishing, the louder they grew. They reached a deafening crescendo before Eris's movements came to a stop inside of him.
Azriel groaned out in protest. He was about to cum from Eris's fingers alone. His hips thrusted uselessly as he tried to get him moving again
Eris leaned down and sucked Azriel's lips into a kiss. "You're not cumming until you're on my cock, you big bat." He slipped his fingers out of Azriel.
Eris sat back and started slicking his cock up with oil.
"I want you to start off riding me," he said, "that way I know you're in control in the start. The magic is getting to me, I don't know how much longer I can keep it contained and I don't want to hurt you."
The sentiment thrummed in Azriel's chest.
He swung a leg over the male and settled up against his chest. Eris was sat up, a hand on the ground behind him to prop himself. The other was still stroking his cock.
Since the males were the same height standing, Azriel rose over him a bit while sitting in his lap. He leaned forward, unable to resist the temptation of kissing Eris.
When he pulled back, Eris was giving him a look that knocked the wind out of him. There was a well of desire and admiration in his eyes. No one had ever looked at Azriel with such raw longing before.
He felt Eris line himself up behind him. The head pressed against him and Azriel rocked his hips back slightly. He had to press hard to get the tip to pop in and when he did, he released a long whine at the burn.
Azriel gripped the High Lord's shoulders tightly. His features twisted at the discomfort and he stayed motionless for a while. With one hand still holding himself, Eris raised the other to rub along Azriel's lower back.
Eris tilted his chin up and recaptured Azriel's lips. It proved a welcome distraction and shortly Azriel was rocking his hips again, taking more of Eris's cock in him.
The hand Eris had on his lower back was gently pushing him down on every rock, increasing the pace at which Azriel took him. It was the only sign of desperation from the High Lord.
Once Eris was far enough inside him that he didn't need to guide his cock in anymore, his hand reached around Azriel's front to press a thumb against the skin between Azriel's balls and hole.
The jolt that shot through Azriel was similar to the one from the spot inside him. With a renewed desired, Azriel pushed down into the press of Eris's thumb. As his hips chased the pleasure of the pressure, Azriel was surprised to find himself meet the jut of Eris's hips below him. He had taken him to the hilt.
He leaned into Eris's neck and moaned loudly at the feeling of the male's cock fully enclosed within him.
"Fuck. So good Azriel. You're so good."
Azriel was stretched so wide on the base of Eris's thick cock. He felt the tip deep within his stomach.
In that moment, Azriel was completely owned by the High Lord.
He raised his hips up a few inches and dropped back down. Eris let out a rasping groan and tightened his arms around Azriel.
Azriel's shadows wrapped around the pair as he began to ride Eris in earnest. Eris's cock scrapped deliciously along that spot inside of him and Azriel rode him hard, addicted to the feeling.
His full, leaking cock bounced forgotten beneath their stomachs.
"You're riding me so good, Azriel. You feel fucking amazing." Eris groaned into his ear.
The praise made Azriel's skin flush. He wanted to erase every fae from Eris's memory. Make him forget anyone that wasn't him.
He bounced mindlessly on Eris's length. Content to stay like that, wringing the helpless moans from the male's mouth.
But the pressure on his thighs grew to be too much and Azriel still needed it harder. He couldn't ride Eris's cock hard or fast enough to get what he wanted.
"Eris," he moaned deeply. "More. I want more."
"Gods, Azriel. Anything. I'll give you anything you want."
"Fuck me, please."
Without pulling out, Eris flipped him onto his back, showing care for his wings. He hooked both of Azriel's legs over his arms and placed his hands onto the dirt floor in the gap between Azriel's waist and wings. He then started pounding so hard into Azriel that the Illyrian saw stars.
The feeling of the full length of Eris's thick cock pistoning in and out him rendered Azriel speechless. All he could do was grip Eris's back and moan into the air in the hollow of the tree.
The beat of the Great Rite's drums resumed, matching the rhythm at which Eris fucked in to him. The slap of their pelvises reverberated in the enclosed space.
Eris dropped his legs and lowered himself on to his forearms by Azriel's head. The shallower angle made him grind furiously against that spot along Azriel's walls. Eris nipped at his lower lip, panting into his mouth.
"You're so gods damn perfect Azriel."
Azriel moaned at the words.
The drums raced around them.
"So. fucking. beautiful." Each word from Eris was interrupted by a brutally deep thrust.
"I wish I could fuck you all night but I'm so close," the High Lord continued on.
Azriel nodded in agreement, wrapping his legs tight around Eris's hips. He didn't want the male pulling too far away from him, not now. He hole was squeezing sporadically around Eris's length.
"I-" Azriel couldn't get anything out, too busy moaning.
The drumming was reaching a crescendo again. It rocked against Azriel's skin.
"What is it." Eris brushed kisses along Azriel's jaw as he fucked him.
The beat around them was deafening.
"I feel so good, Eris-" Azriel groaned out the male's name.
It must've been from witnessing the delirium of Azriel's pleasure that he caused but at his words, Eris shouted out a long surprised groan. Azriel felt the male's cock twitching inside of him and his thrusts stuttered to quick, deep jabs. Heat bloomed within Azriel's stomach from the High Lord cumming.
At the sensation of the pulsing warmth of Eris's cum inside him, Azriel felt his own cock start to shoot. He grabbed himself moaning as his strokes heightened his finish.
As Azriel plummeted down into his orgasm, the drums of the Rite's magic pulsed through him. The beat matching the rhythm of his heart hammering inside him. Azriel's legs tightened around Eris as they both rose and fell through the waves of their pleasure, creating their own rhythm that sang with the magic of the night.
Fingers still dug tightly into the pale muscled back above him, Azriel's release came to an end. His legs dropped and relaxed to the ground as all his strength flooded away. He felt Eris's cock give one final kick inside him before he too finished and relaxed fully down onto Azriel's front.
The thrum of the magic in the air came to a stop, the sounds of the woods rushing in to fill the silence left by the drum's departure.
They laid there, Azriel wasn't sure how long, catching their breath. He closed his eyes, laid his head back, and enjoyed the warmth of Eris pressed against him.
The pressure on his wings soon became too much and he shifted, pushing slightly at Eris's hips.
With a groan, the male on top of him pushed up onto him arms, staring down between them as he pulled out. Azriel hissed at the sensation.
"M'sorry," Eris murmured, rubbing a hand down Azriel's thigh soothingly.
Eris Vanserra was rubbing his thigh.
Hundreds of fae showed up tonight with the hopes they'd be the lucky ones selected to sleep with the High Lord. And here Azriel was, in the middle of some historic magical tree, spend dripping out of him, getting his thigh rubbed by Cauldron-damned Eris Vanserra.
It was completely fucking surreal.
Azriel giggled. He didn't think he'd ever giggled in his life.
He felt drunk on the atmosphere. Maybe this was an after-effect of the magic's let-down; after the high of Rite abated you were left feeling delirious.
Eris took one look at him and started laughing too. They were definitely delirious.
Leaning his weight forward into his forearms again, Eris rested his forehead against Azriel's collarbone as laughter kept rocking his frame. Azriel buried his face in the silky red hair below him, chuckling into it.
With deep breaths, they both collected themselves.
Eris rose up onto his knees and glanced down between Azriel's legs.
"Fuck," Eris groaned, throwing his head back," You need to close your legs or I'm going to be ready for round two in a few seconds."
Azriel burst into laughter again, kicking Eris away from him.
"Gods," Eris moaned as he clambered to his feet. He reached a hand out for Azriel who took it and forced Eris to do most of the work pulling him up.
Azriel wrapped his arms around Eris's hips, the other male grabbing his bicep and throwing his second arm around Azriel's neck.
Silence weighed down on them as they stood facing each other. Eris's thumb left a path of heat in the arcs it swiped along Azriel's bicep. His other hand played in the short cropped hair at the base of Azriel's head.
With the high of the night seeping from his system and Eris's hands tracing warm paths along his skin, Azriel felt his eyes start to droop.
"Will you stay with me tonight?" Eris whispered, lips only mere inches away from Azriel's own. Anything louder would've felt like a shout in the calm atmosphere around them.
Azriel nodded in assent, he wasn't sure any words would make it out of him.
He leaned forward capturing Eris's lips in a delicate kiss. They stayed like that, mouths moving slowly together, until Eris pulled again with one last nip to Azriel's lower lip.
"C'mon," he murmured, backing away from Azriel. With a snap of his fingers, Eris magicked both of their clothes back on.
Azriel walked up to press into Eris's front again and raised his hands to straighten the male's cloak which skewed haphazardly on his shoulders.
"Magic is not a precise science," Eris justified.
Mustering up the energy to speak, he replied, "You're such an ass."
Cackling, Eris winnowed them away in a crack of flames and light.
...........................................
The large rustic living room of Eris's manor was blessedly cool.
Warmth prickled along Azriel's skin, it felt like the sun was beaming down on him. He'd lived most of his life at a temperature that matched the night-time air on a crisp autumn night. This was a welcome change but an odd adjustment.
Azriel had a feeling the fire lord with him had something to do with it.
His eyes traced the wooden beams that led to the top of the room's vaulted ceilings as Eris moved around the kitchen in the distance.
Shuffling alerted Azriel to his entrance back into the living room.
He eagerly accepted the tall glass of water Eris handed to him and chugged it in one go, spilling a good portion of it down his chin.
"Brute"
Azriel glared at him through the glass.
"Didn't stop you from fucking me."
Eris's eyes darkened at the words, the right side of his face was lit up from the moonlight pouring in through the sizable windows that framed the woods outside. The High Lord only shrugged, grinning wildly.
His own grin grew in response. This was probably the most he'd smiled in one day. There was an ache in his cheeks from his overuse of the action; mindlessly he rubbed at the sore spots.
"Get used to it," Eris said.
Azriel didn't know if he meant the fucking or the smiling. Both would be fine, he figured.
They stumbled upstairs, giggling like a pair of drunk younglings every time Azriel's wings caught on the stairs. He was usually much better about keeping them raised but his body felt like it'd been sitting in the birchin for an hour- every muscle loose and tired.
Eris's bedroom was large and its foundation was laid by the same rich, dark wood that Azriel had loved in the kitchen. On the opposite side of the bedroom's entryway was a wall of windows and a glass door that led out to a partially enclosed terrace.
In the moonlight, Azriel vaguely deciphered a few plush couches and ottomans clustered together out there. They were enclosed by concrete columns that lined the terrace's perimeter. Enough space was between each column that, if Azriel wished, he could climb the railing and sail out over the autumnal canopy on his wings.
"You look like you're plotting your escape." Eris's sharp gaze tracked Azriel's own. He'd always been able to read him like book much to Azriel's chagrin.
"A good fighter always has an exit strategy."
A flash of sadness crossed Eris's expression at his words. There- and then gone- before Azriel could truly register it.
Reality began crashing in around him, settling a heavy weight on his chest.
To distract himself, he stepped onwards into the room and continued his assessment of the space. To the right was a massive fireplace framed by a large picture window on either side. Azriel saw the glow of faelights at the Forest House in the distance. There were two leather armchairs placed in front of the fireplace.
The left of the room held a palatial bed, wide enough to comfortably fit two winged fae if desired.
It was a wonderful space. If Azriel had ever desired to design his own, it likely would've looked a lot like this. It was nothing akin to Feyre and Rhy's palatial, overly ornate estate, or the soulless sandstone interiors of the House of Wind. Eris's room- his house- was warm and inviting, it beckoned Azriel in like a moth to a flame.
Eris, having followed Azriel into the room, continued on, "There are stairs up to the roof... if you wanted to know other escape options. It'd probably be easier to take off and land there."
Azriel turned to face the male behind him and asked, "Why do you have stairs to your roof?" Odd indeed for a male who could never and would ever be able to fly himself.
"Why not?" Eris wouldn't meet his eyes then.
But Azriel knew. Deep down he knew, had always known.
The roof. The two armchairs in front of the fire place. The dining chairs carved for wings. The male's burning gaze that was able to melt away centuries of ice that coated the outside of Azriel's soul.
He knew what it all meant, used to be terrified of it. Yesterday afternoon he feared it so much he could hardly breath.
He wasn't scared anymore.
And Eris knew too. Had likely known far longer than Azriel- he was always so clever.
Eris had probably figured it out forever ago and let it rot away inside of him. Trapped in his mind, tormenting him like the scars from his father that would never mar his skin.
"Centuries, Azriel," Eris muttered. It was as if the fire-blooded male in front of him, who still would not look at Azriel, could read every thought that ran through his mind. Could he?
Silence settled around them. Eris's attention focused on the dew fogged window next to them. He looked fixedly at the Forest House lights gleaming in the distance.
"I've wanted you- this- for centuries," Eris ground out. The truth, at last.
"I have known for centuries." Each word out of Eris's mouth sounded pained.
Azriel walked up to the male, reached out a scarred hand to gently grab his chin and turned his face towards him.
He traced every inch of Eris's face with his thumb. The strong jaw that framed everything. The sharp cut of the cupid's bow on his full lips. The long, straight bridge of his nose. The flushed cheeks that burned under Azriel's touch. The constellation of freckles that dotted his porcelain skin. The permanent crease between his brows, the only sign of mortality on his beautiful, immortal face.
He looked nothing like Azriel but looking upon him was like gazing into a mirror.
"All this time? Everything?" Azriel whispered. He couldn't find it in himself to elaborate, desperately hoped that Eris would once again understand what he meant.
"Everything. Always. It was always you." Eris's brows cut together, a look of sorrow and desperation overtaking the face under Azriel's thumb.
A small whimper escaped Azriel's lips but he clamped down on it.
The small sound must've been enough for Eris because it seemed a dam broke inside of him with the way his next words poured out.
"From the first moment I saw you at Hewn City, I knew Azriel. I could feel it so deep in my bones that it ached. But the engagement to Mor had already been finalized and I had no clue what to do. I knew you loved her, saw how you looked at her. I felt sick. My mate-"
Another whimper broke from Azriel's lips at the word. Eris spoke it with such finality and confidence.
At its utterance, a key clicked into place deep inside Azriel's chest and opened a truth that he had known all along.
"My mate," Eris continued "was in love with the female I was set to marry. Quickly, I grew to realize Mor's desperation for freedom, the truth about herself she kept hidden away. I couldn't help her. Azriel, you have to believe me. I tried. But, I had so little power to fix the situation. Leaving her there- in the woods, leaving her to her freedom, it was the best I could do. I thought she would understand. I thought you would underst-" Eris's voice cracked on the last word and he ducked his head down out of Azriel's hands to hide it from view.
Composing himself with a deep breath, Eris raised his head and continued on.
"I never imagined my actions would lead to you hating me for centuries. I thought I'd have a chance to explain. I thought you- Mor- Rhysand- anybody- I thought somebody would understand that if I helped her, she would have become a ward of my court. Trapped there. Keir knew; that's why he left her in my woods. Eventually I realized it was for the better- you hating me. I was a fool for ever thinking otherwise. I still had no power against my father and if he ever suspected, ever got a whiff, of what you were to me, he would have tried to kill you. He most certainly would have killed me. And it all would have been for nothing. I knew I did the right thing after he executed Jesminda. She was harmless, so innocent, a member of his own court, and he still killed her for the crime of being a lesser fae in love with my brother. It was then that I decided to never do anything but make you hate me. I wanted you as far away from me as possible. I could handle the torture my father inflicted upon me but the one thing I'd never be able to bare was him hurting you. Not you. Never you."
Eris's voice shook as silent tears cut across his cheeks. Azriel wondered how he could still be so beautiful while he cried.
"You were this precious thing that the Mother had blessed me with and the only thing that mattered to me was keeping you safe. And the only way I could do that was by keeping you far away from me and the reaches of Beron. Then everything with Amarantha happened. Forty-nine years under there and Azriel, you were the only thing that got me through it. Knowing you were safe, wherever you were, and that you were out there. I made a vow to myself that if I lived through the ordeal, if I ever managed to be free, I'd fix my wrongs. I didn't want to die knowing you still hated me. I wanted to see you, at least once, look upon me with something other than loathing. But then I got addicted to it- addicted to you not hating me anymore. Addicted to being with you, speaking to you, learning about you, playing gods damned chess with you. I crave it more than I crave my next breath. Five hundred years of torment and the past year has made every second worth it. I would do it all again. I would suffer another five centuries of you loving another, another five centuries of facing my father's cruelty, another five centuries of being hated by all of Prythian just for this- just for you."
Azriel's vision blurred from the tears flooding in his eyes, mind whirring as he tried to process the weight of Eris's confessions. No words came to him. Instead, he leaned forward into Eris's shoulder and sobbed. He sobbed and sobbed, releasing centuries worth of sadness and pain and loneliness that had built up inside him. He found a comfort in the crook of Eris's neck that he'd felt never anywhere else before.
It was as if his soul knew he'd met his mate all those years ago in the depths of Hewn City and had been decaying inside him ever since, growing sick at the distance that separated it from its other half. As Azriel leaned into the warmth of Eris, he felt a small part of his frozen, sad soul started to heal.
Eris said nothing, stroking a thumb across the back of Azriel's neck. He leaned more heavily into the sturdy support of Eris's body with each soothing swipe.
"Let's go to bed," Eris whispered into his ear once the sobs stopped racking Azriel's body and his choppy breathing evened out.
There'd be more time to talk tomorrow. The darkness of the night felt too fragile for the words they would need to share, the decisions that needed to be made.
Eris turned his head and gently brushed his lips across Azriel's. They fell in to one another, deepening the kiss before pulling away to catch their breath.
Eris ran the hand that was on the back of his neck down his arm, fingers ghosting across the sleeve of the dark green jacket Azriel wore. At the cuff, he danced along the black sewn embellishments before finally trailing down to tangle his fingers with Azriel's.
Wordlessly, he pulled him towards the bed.
When they got to the foot of it, Eris raised his hands up and began unclasping the silver buttons that held Azriel's jacket closed. He then reached around his back and unbuttoned the ones that ran from the bottom hem to the base of his wings.
"I really do like this jacket on you," Eris whispered into the depth of the silence.
"I knew you would," Azriel murmured back.
He said nothing about the disbelief that twinkled in Eris's eyes. He knew Azriel too well.
Kicking off his shoes and shucking down the tight black trousers he wore, Azriel rounded the bed to the right side closest to the wall of windows. Behind him, he heard Eris also undressing.
Azriel lifted back the heavy duvet and stretched out on his stomach, hoping to give his wings some reprieve from the pressure they'd endured that night. The cool cotton sheets tempered the burning he felt inside of him.
Eris climbed in next to him and laid on his back.
Turning to face the High Lord, his High Lord, he reached out a hand to grasp the wrist that lay closest to him and stroked the delicate skin there.
At the contact, Eris slid over underneath Azriel's outstretched wing, moving closer to him as their gaze locked.
Fire blazed deep inside his amber eyes. It felt like an old friend; one that had scarred him long ago but would never again.
They probably should've bathed, should've eaten something, should've talked more. But the smell of sandalwood and cinnamon flooded Azriel's senses, seeping the energy from his body. All he could do was watch the fire dance in the eyes next to him and think about how Eris smelled like a long-lost nostalgia that he'd finally found.
For the first time, sleep welcomed Azriel with open arms and he felt at peace.
#azris#azris fanfiction#azriel x eris#azriel x eris fanfiction#eris vanserra#azriel#azriel acotar#azris supremacy#acotar#acotar fanfic#azriel fanfic#eris fanfic#my old friend fire
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Pippin Bitty
Felt like drawing a Bitty today so have some more of the Pippin, with fun facts!
A Pippin is a subclass of Bonsai-Bitty (another of which is the Pazazz)
Bonsai-Bitties are a kind of Plant-Bitty that use a skeletal structure to carry a root and branch system: a walking tree
Bonsai-Bitties have 'wings' which are actually their canopy: leaves, branches, and flowers make up the many structures
The wings of a Bonsai-bitty are sensitive to touch, capable of crude vision (light, color, movement, and shape), used for breathing and photosynthesis, and are also used in reproduction
The wings of a Bonsai-bitty may secrete pollen, nectar, or sap, given relevant circumstances
Bonsai-Bitties are capable of great chemical complexity, and will often change their chemical makeup to communicate (or for some other conscious purpose). This results in changes to their coloration, smell, taste, and toxicity.
A happy, healthy Bonsai-Bitty can be harvested from for edible or medicinal substances
The wings of a Bonsai Bitty has indeterminate growth
And about the Pippin, specifically:
Pippins are a type of Bonsai Bitty which display cool-colored pigmentation
Pippins prefer cooler temperatures and semi-humid to unreasonably damp conditions. They enjoy sleeping in water pools. A Pippin can breathe in freshwater through their wings with little trouble, but cannot breathe in salt-water for more than an hour at a time.
They especially enjoy playing in ice and snow, but ought not to be kept in freezing temperatures for more than a few hours at a time: they can and will catch colds.
A Pippin is boundlessly loyal to its chosen Person, even before becoming a proper bondmate. If they 'choose' a person, they will pursue them persistently.
A Pippin that has found its chosen Person will desire to be beside them at all times, even when their Person cannot pay direct attention to them. They will hide in pockets or bags, sit on shoulders, or sit on the head, in order to remain as close as possible whenever they can get away with it.
Pippins are sedentary by nature, and will take naps often. While they can perform incredible feats of speed, strength, and acrobatics, their stamina is lacking.
Pippins are affectionate: they will show their affection with closeness, cuddles, nuzzles, and shedding.
Pippins are incredibly intelligent, and crave knowledge both fictional and nonfictional. They can often be found enjoying books, videos, comics, and podcasts.
The Pippin's personality is fundamentally easygoing and kind. They have a great capacity for compassion.
That being said: the Pippin's intelligence makes it capable of developing in a wide variety of directions.
A young Pippin is quick to learn and a model student, making them easy to train.
Pippins are emotionally brittle: once a Pippin has experienced what it perceives to be betrayal, it will quickly learn mistrust. Such a Pippin is more difficult to socialize and train going forward, but is no less intelligent or capable if handled with care.
A Pippin is excessively protective of what it perceives to be its 'things', whether those things are literal objects or the people it values. It is equally likely to imprint upon other bitties.
Although Pippins are by nature non-aggressive, a Pippin will respond to the aggression of others, especially if it is targeting something the Pippin values.
Pippins have an incredible sense of smell. They can track an individual for several miles with little trouble.
Up close, a Pippin's sense of smell can give them great swaths of information, including the health and emotional state of the person
Older Pippins and Pippins which have healed from an injury may display darker colors in their wings.
Pippin wings are generally slow growing after a certain point, and will not usually need trimming more than 1-4 times a year. It is recommended that Pippin trims be done under anesthesia by a trained professional, as they are highly sensitive.
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what if y/n or reader was the villain in the show welcome home puppet show and had a crush on one of the character
There was only one person who did this so far and i loved it
would the reader go easy on them or harder so no one would know
would they show concern when there crush is crying
would they stop there plans all together if they were asked by that person (only for a day maybe)
Tysm for the request and love the idea! And I’m doing this with 2 of the members in cast if that is ok because no on was specified on here and I just really want to write about Julie! Also this is fan content of welcome home that has nothing to do with the lore!
Oh to be the antagonist of this story is very “interesting”. You’re always the cause of the moral of the story on why doing whatever it was is bad. Or you just sabotage them throughout the show.
But mostly sabotaging the main character Wally Darling. Always messing up his paintings by adding yourself to the picture. Literally you just crudely draw yourself right beside him. Even going as far as to cross a few of his friends out or replace their heads with yours. While always leaving a signature evil as yours right next to his with a little heart. All over yours and his neat signature. Sometimes putting a heart around both your signatures as a way to circle them. You thought it was cute and a sweet sorry. While Wally was sometimes annoyed by this you would always cut him off before he could say anything.
Most of the time apologizing with “ I’m so so very very sor-sore- sarh- sarh-I think I’m gonna puke! SORY! I said it now you can’t be mad at me…oh geepers my tummy is all topsy turvery now I hope your happy!”
Yes for comedic purposes you could never say sorry without almost puking it was a curse and a gift.
You would always go the hardest on him. No matter where or who he was with Wally would always be your main target. He was just so much fun to mess with. Such as putting the blame on him in Howdy Pillar’s shop by stealing an apple from its once neat stand. Leaving a mess for the yellow man to have to clean up himself. As they all fall you disappear with a clever disguise. Glasses and a mustache. The perfect disguise no one can recognize you! Well kinda? Howdy and Frank always know it’s you and you have no idea how. You fooled Julie and Barnaby with it. Even Wally you think? So how are they exposing you like that!?
For anyone else maybe a few pranks here and there but Wally oh dear sweet Wally will always be victim to your harshest pranks.
But Wally was also the only person you ever listened to that made you stop your devious plans all together. One little “ No, not today Neighbor.” And you’re done for. Fully defeated, and devastated that your plans were cancelled. Not really to be honest you could always do them next time.
Crying. Is something you’d never really try to make anyone do. Really it’s all harmless fun until someone gets hurt. And if Wally do happened to get hurt or start crying your the one who is literally comforting him. Pulling out tons of tissues from your pocket. Panicking over the fact that you made him cry. So you’ll disappear for a few days and go very and almost too easy in everyone especially Wally for once.
You were once again in your unnoticeable disguise. The same one you always wore as you walked around the colorful road of the neighborhood to find Wally. You the came upon the man asking what to paint. Excitedly rushing over onto his shoulder.
“ I think you should paint me~!” you announced dramatically catching the blue haired man off guard.
“ Sure neighbor.” He said gaining his composure now catching you off guard.
Now this was a surprise as you blushed. You quirked your eyebrow at his calmness and to the fact that he willingly without hesitation said he would paint you.
“ Fine then…stranger! Paint me as if I’m the most amazing person in the world! Because I am!” You proclaimed in a dramatic pose.
“ Whatever you say ___.” He said with a sigh as he started to paint catching you fully off guard.
You panicked declaring an answer on how he knew it was you.
“ You use the same disguise and put a different mustache on every time you’re doing something no good.” He said as you huffed.
You thought no one would notice especially with the purple mustache. Come on it was purple and very long and pointy too. And you even got different shoes. This is so unbelievable the nerve of that pretty man!
To be the antagonist of the story and have Julie as your main “victim” is the hardest thing ever. She always laughs and says “ Oh neighbor you’re so silly!” or “ Can you teach me how to do that!?” and even “ Hear let me help you I know an easier way to do that.”
She is too nice to you. She even laughs when you’re doing your evil laugh too! It throws your whole vibe off! You’re supposed to be the evil villain that strikes fear and misery. Not the joke of a villian with some stupidly adorable blonde who always helps and complements you! No she’s supposed to fear you not hug you right after you just tripped over falling face first from your epic exit!
With Julie you go harder on her than anyone else! Not because you like her no it’s because you hate that she is supper nice and supportive; She’s always trying to help you become a better person and…she needs to be stopped. Julie is always thought rushed away from you when Frank is near. The man pulls her away as she tells you “ Bye ___! Hope you have a good day!”
“ Guys I think they just need a chance!” She’ll say while being told “ THEY JUST TRIED TO TRICK HOWDY INTO GIVING THEM OWNER SHIP OF HIS OWN SHOP!”
Making Julie cry is the worst thing you could ever do. Literally if you’re the reason she cried or because you ran into the always happy blonde crying you better give her a hug. It’s technically illegal not to. She is just a ball of pure sunshine that is too nice. If you don’t hug or try to comfort her you’re a heartless monster at that point. But if you are the reason she cried because of you. Do not show your face for a few days. Never show your face again you monster!
“ Hey Julie….Um so I’m sorry about what happened yesterday… I brought you flowers.” You sighed as you handed her the huge bouquet of all her favorite flowers.
“Listen I swear I didn’t mean to ruin that feild of flowers…my Poison-inator3000 somehow malfunction and-“ “ Oh Neighbor! You’re the best!” She gasped hugging you around the neck with a loving squeeze.
She happily smiled at you as you just stood in show with the bouquet still in your hands. You slowly hugged her unsure how to huge her in your akward position and mental state. The sweet blonde is hugging you. Repeat the sweet adorable blonde is hugging you.
Sorry for the wait I’ve been busy recently. So expect me to post more often! Hope you’re all doing well or things are getting better!
Sincerely-Cup1dT3a💕
#julie joyful#wally darling#welcome home x reader#julie joyful x reader#wally welcome home#julie joyful welcome home
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hey, i love ur fics🤍🫶 (louder than everyone else)
can i request an ao’nung x fem! metkayina! reader? he’s REALLY overprotective of her and when the sully’s arrive, he notices how neteyam is being flirty with her and she’s completely oblivious to it. so ao’nung gets jealous and eventually just goes off on neteyam, they start fighting, it’s just a MESS. so while y/n is patching up ao’nung’s bruises, it just turns into a little comforting moment w/ reassurance and yeah (sorry if this is a lot, i tried to be as specific as possible😭)
Oblivious of my heart
Ao'nung x Fem Metkayina Reader
//Aw Thank you anon! I love when people love my fics. Dont worry i actually prefer a lot over too little! You did great
Ao'nung adored you. You knew that. Ever since the farthest of your memory could serve you.
And you adored him just as much
Truthfully it was a no brainer when he stake claim over being the one who would court you. But it still surprised you nonetheless.
It was nice to feel wanted and that's the life that you had known for the mean time.
Until the Sully's arrived.
At least that was what Ao'nung felt.
You were excited to finally have something new. Not that it wasn't an eventful life you lived. You taught the kids the basics with Tsireya, Went on hunting trips with Ao'nung and the rest of the hunters.
Or you helped the weavers as they taught you new things here and there.
and it had been not that long ago that Ronal sought that you also learned the ways of the Tsahik.
But it had grown a little boring. Same schedule same routine. You craved something different.
And that's when they showed up.
You were just as excited as Tsireya to help teach the Sully's. Though obviously you could tell what her reasoning was.
Without much thinking you went to help the girls with their things. Making eye contact with the eldest boy.
You giving him a smile as he returned it. But unaware to you his eyes lingered just a little longer that Ao'nung deemed okay.
You Followed behind them. Next to Ao'nung and Rotxo who were close behind you.
"im not all to happy with you dearest" You said not even turning to look at Ao'nung
"What?"
"You two no better than to make such crude remarks"
Ao'nung rolled his eyes as Rotxo nodded and apologized that you managed to somehow see that.
You handed over the bags that you had helped carry, The eldest taking it and looking at you with something in his eyes. Something Ao'nung held to you before you two became a pair.
"Thank you, Sorry i never got your name"
"Y/n. And you?"
"Im Neteyam. Nice to meet you"
You smiled Shaking his hand smiling at him. "I cant wait to teach you two"
"I cant wait to learn!"
The ever swinging tail that he had was overlooked by you. His growing smile and blush was as well. But Ao'nung saw, and the distaste he had for the sully's now had its target
--------------------------------------
Now You found that you liked Neteyam's company. You did. He was kind always willing to help and really it was almost like having an elder brother.
However Neteyam took this time to get closer in other ways that you hadn't really thought off. He would steal you away for things that he wanted to 'learn'
You loved to teach the wonders of the Metkayina life.
During this time Ao'nung would often stalk you. And with good reason. He often heard Neteyam compliment you, Throw little jokes your way. He made you laugh. He was flirting.
"you are beautiful"
"Your eyes are stunning"
"you look great today"
And he wasnt gonna disagree with it either. You were everything and more. The Purest of fruits and the beauty that radiated out of many.
Today he decided to seek you out. No doubt around Neteyam as he wouldn't be far from you.
"I think i should like to know about you? What didn't you have anyone at home you miss? no girl? or guy?"
Neteyam laugh a little his gaze now turning to you. The softness was one he knew to well. That gentle feeling of adoration when he saw you. He knew too well
"No. I never found to like anyone like you"
You were by far too oblivious. He knew that. Often when he voiced that he didn't like Neteyam you would brush it off telling him that everything was fine. And all you did was smile
"im sure you could find many women here that like you! Im sure if you look they'll be willing to give you a shot"
"Would you?"
That was it. Ao'nung thought. He had enough of you doing nothing about it cause you liked to believe he wanted to be your friend. Ao'nung marched out to the shore and glared daggers at Neteyam.
"Ao'nung?"
"I think its time you back off"
"me?" Neteyam asked raising a brow as he couldnt believe his eyes. Every time he tried to talk to you more intimately Ao'nugn would steal you away. Anytime he wanted to ask you about where you two stood Ao'nung ruined it. And he had enough.
"Yes you!"
"Ao'nung!"
"You're the one always getting in the way!" Neteyam yelled back.
It happened honestly too quickly. You couldn't react quickly as you watched Ao'nung and Neteyam hit the ground hard. Punches being throw and you did your best of breaking them apart. But yelling to get any attention for help.
You heard the crunch of Ao'nung's nose being broke but saw the busted lip on Neteyam.
Rotxo and Lo'ak bless their soul had come to help you finally seperating the two fighting Na'vi's
"Stay Away From What's Mine! Or So help me"
"That's enough Ao'nung" You yelled looking over his wounds. You prayed for the patience to not twist his arm in two.
"She is mine! My Tsahik! My Mate Get it through your skull Forest boy"
You hit him again. Not caring for his injuries as you then turned to Neteyam. He didnt look as bad as Ao'nung but none the less still hurt.
Taking a small little bow from your medicine pouch you gave it to him. Excusing Ao'nung's actions too
"I'm so sorry for Ma Ao'nung! I swear he's never this way"
But when you spoke it really did solidify what Ao'nung had said. You were his. And he was stupid enough to believe or even see how he was also yours.
Bidding him a goodbye you left to go treat Ao'nung. No doubt about to have an earful from his mother too.
----------------------------
"I pray for the strength that i myself dont break your nose some more" You said patching up Ao'nung here and there with the help if his mother.
Ronal had been quiet. She felt prideful that she didn't have to scold him. no Doubt you would get to him much more than herself.
"I mean what goes on in this tiny mind of yours to think it was a good idea to fight?"
"I told you many times, He keeps flirting with you its about time he learned a thing or two"
You sighed. Biting down your tongue as you looked at Ronal. "May we be left alone Tsahik?"
Oh this was juicy. She thought but she respected your wishes and left.
You two sat in silence for a while. You throwing on the paste harshly at his bruises and split open skin.
"Ao'nung"
"Dont be upset with me please" Ao'nung said. Now not being able to fight back the tears of frustration he held on for too long. " I cannot bare the thought of you finding someone better than me. Someone who is so deserving of all you are"
"Ao'nung no no!" You said now putting the bowl down and going to give him a tight squeeze. "what ever made you think that?"
"Every time i saw you with him. You seemed so much happier. Like an Atokirina floating blissfully within the world. Happy and light at your feet with him. And im afraid, Im terribly afraid you will leave me dearest"
You sighed. Kissing his temple laying him on your lap. Stroking his hair as you let him sob a bit.
"I cant wait to mate with you"
"what?"
"I can not wait to be your mate. To be one in the eyes of Eywa. I can not wait to be your muntxate. I cannot wait to have kids with you. Cant wait to be the Tsahik to your Olo'eyktan. I cannot wait to grow old with you. But you have to trust me that you make me the happiest"
Ao'nung and you sat there in silence for a second. The words sinking into ao'nung before you looked back to him.
"do you?"
"I do, Ma yawntutsyìp"
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//I hope you liked it Anon! Be sure if you got any more great ideas to send em my way! I love writing requests!!
#atwow imagines#ao'nung x reader#ao’nung x reader#aonung x reader#atwow#avatar the way of water#Requests#send me requests
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You said you don't believe in democracy. How do you believe society should work?
It should work well.
Ha ha only serious; I imagine one of the things going wrong is that targeting a form of governance as such wastes a lot of energy with 1) people trying to solve problems by doubling down on the form, 2) ruleslawyers hiding behind the form.
I don't have a fully worked out theory, I lean anarcho-monarchist, I don't think I need a fully worked out theory to observe that democracy on That Island 1) thoroughly failed to deliver on its repeated promise, 2) was unashamed by failing to deliver. It's on an island, damn it. Immigration control should be absolutely trivial there.
Labour promised reduced immigration, Labour didn't deliver, the people voted out Labour and voted in Conservative which promised reduced immigration, Conservative didn't deliver either, and so on, for five elections in a row.
"but what if the king was terrible" - what, are you suggesting the king might respond to repeated gang-rape slave-ring scandals by importing more stormtroopers from Rapeslaveland? 🙄
"but historical monarchies sucked" - yeah, they sucked because they were mostly pre-electricity. Metapolitical opinion: almost everything good of the past thousand years was produced by, putting it crudely, techbros. Electricity, petroleum, the steam engine, the cotton gin, the tractor, the Haber-Bosch process, the mechanical loom, the crane, and so on. We live well mostly because of automation machines and cheap energy, and government form is secondary.
Activists and reformers are sometimes redistributing the benefits of machines, sometimes they're making things worse, as we see today with "environmentalists" spending the last few decades blocking nuclear power that would be both clean and cheap. The batshit insane German Green Party even voted to shut down a nuclear power plant that was already running.
Then, because energy is fungible, winters are cold, and relying on Russian oil supply sucks, Germany had to re-open a previously closed coal power plant. Way to protect the planet, Greens! 🙄
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Prompt #12: Quarry
The line between summer and autumn blurred; cicadas still sang in unison, yet chilled air swept through the trees. Dane salvaged these days if the sun presented itself, which brought her to this specific stump in the Shroud. She sat as a behaved child would, practicing embroidery patterns Niamh gifted her. Still awful at them, of course, but she kept at it so long as her patience remained.
“You're getting good at those!” Niamh chirped, peeking at Dane's progress between shots.
“Not… really,” she sighed, tilting her head to inspect her work. As if that would change her perception.
“Well, you're working faster than before. Still improvement!” Dane hadn't considered the thought. Too focused on her dodo that resembled a wet cotton boll instead of her favorite animal. It looked just like her crude drawings, which irritated the hells out of her. How could two pieces of art look identical using completely different tools?
“...That's true. Thank you.” Despite her differing opinion, it was still important to acknowledge the kind words of others. The behaved child comment was applicable to her in many ways. Which led Dane to her follow-up comment. “You haven't missed a single one.”
They sat in the forest's clearing, a favorable spot for both activities. Dane soaked up the season's remaining sunshine while fumbling with a needle and thread, and Niamh scoped out a variety of targets to hone her archery skills. Though it was hardly necessary since the Elezen had an excellent shot. Whether it be a squirrel, boar, or rabbit, she never missed. But never birds; she was too fond of them.
Dane knew when to watch. They conversed incessantly the entire afternoon, but a silent moment meant Niamh was focused. The bowstring stretched, arrow nocked, then released. A fluid motion that lasted mere seconds.
“I might just be lucky today.” She retrieved another arrow from her quiver, already anticipating the next shot. “But even if I missed a bunch, I still get to spend the day with you!” Dane dipped her head in agreement, sealing the sentiment with a genuine smile.
And that was how good days were measured. Not by missed shots or excellent needlework, but the moments shared with people who mattered.
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Romani women were assaulted by a man in front of their children in Czechia
(04/01/2024)
On the afternoon of 31 March in Teplice, Czech Republic, a Romani woman named Natalie was assaulted in the presence of her child by a non-Romani man who was unknown to her. Natalie says she, her sister and their children were aggressively targeted by the man, who started shouting at them in a local park.
Natalie described going to the park with her young daughter and several other young children from her family. Her sister accompanied them.
“The children were playing with pebbles, they weren’t doing anything to anybody, and he started shouting at my daughter, so I asked him what was bothering him,” Natalie described how the incident started to news server Romea.cz. The man started shouting very vulgar abuse and the women objected.
“We told him not to speak so crudely in front of the children and he walked right up to me and got in my face. I pushed him away more than once, but he assaulted me physically. He slapped me and then, when my sister came to my aid, he slapped her and it became a fight. The children were crying and in total shock,” Natalie described the situation.
“We shouted to the other people in the park to call the police. Eventually my sister called the police and the man started to run away. My sister ran after him for a moment, but her little boy began to cry terribly, so she came back,” Natalie described to Romea.cz.
Police arrived at the scene within 10 minutes. “They downloaded videos from people who had filmed it and I gave my statement to the police today,” Natalie said on 1 April.
“If the children had been white he wouldn’t have even noticed them, but he started shouting directly at my daughter,” Natalie told news server Romea.cz. Police spokesperson Kamil Marek confirmed to news server Romea.cz that police are investigating the incident.
“Police officers in Teplice are investigating an incident on suspicion of misdemeanor behavior. The operations officer immediately sent a police patrol to the scene. The officers immediately started searching for a male suspect meeting the women’s description, but he disappeared. They have requested camera footage and are continuing to identify the suspect,” Marek told Romea.cz.
A brief video clip capturing the incident was posted to social media. The footage shows a little girl weeping and a man assaulting her mother.
The video was available on Facebook during the evening of 31 March; while the original post was subsequently deleted, the video continues to be shared in various groups. News server Romea.cz has obtained the video.
Czech Government Commissioner for Roma Minority Affairs is in contact with the assaulted woman
On the afternoon of the assault, the Vice-Chair of the Czech Government Council for Roma Minority Affairs, Marián Dancso, got in touch with the assaulted woman and accompanied her to the police station the next day. “The woman who was attacked gave a statement to the police today, who were maximally helpful and offered both the woman and her young daughter psychological aid,” Dancso told news server Romea.cz, adding that he was told the police have issued a statewide arrest warrant for the suspect.
Czech Government Commissioner for Roma Minority Affairs Lucie Fuková is also following the case. “I do not have detailed information about this matter yet. After watching the video that is circulating on social media I am outraged by this repulsive violence, especially in the presence of children,” she told Romea.cz, adding that she is in contact with the assaulted woman through Dancso.
“I will keep monitoring the situation,” Fuková said. The ROMEA organization has sent the assaulted woman contact information for the In IUSTITIA organization, which legally aids bias crime victims.
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I have no intention of stealing the show from squirrel anon (if you're reading this, I'm always happy for your ideas about Yulia, luv u <3), but since today we have a fair of unprecedented generosity I want to add something from myself. I have a weak spot in the form of using foreign words in speech and accents. Which characters could use this as a seduction tactic? I'm not hinting at anything, but Andrey could very well purr in Italian I assume.
🧡 anon
That invitation to share ideas was meant for everyone, not just squirrel anon, dw you're more than welcome here!
Andrey, the self-proclaimed renaissance man, will purr in any language in takes for you to part your legs and make space for himself in-between.
He'd recite French poetry in your ear before switching to Italian and whispering absolute filth about how he plans to take you like no man before him ever did, like no man before him ever will.
He will ruin you for every else, you will never be satisfied with another lover after laying with him, mark his words.
It's easy to forget how smart he is, quick to learn and adapt to new language. That man will spend one night with you, hear you slip up and say a word in a different language–maybe your mother tongue—and spend the rest of the week studying it in his free time. Picking up just enough words and general understanding to confidentiality talk dirty to you with it in bed.
He can be a romantic as much as he can be crude. Calling you his muse, his eurydice or even his slut.
Andrey is not afraid of deliberately targeting your kinks. Noticing the way your breath slows down when his voice gets lower.
The way he enraptures you whole by purring a different language against your neck, reciting foreign poems while leaving hickeys down your collarbone, sucking against your senses skin. As seductive as the devil in all of his earned confidence and seamless charm.
-
Aglaya is another character that comes to mind. Inquisitors need to be resourceful and knowledgeable, picking up a foreign language or five must have been mandatory in her training. They're problem solvers, they must be ready to sent wherever they are needed.
She was simply sharing one of her favourite poems with you, a fitting one for the current trial she's facing. It was in a foreign tongue, yet she smoothly recited it, a crisp pronunciation on the first try.
The effect it had on you, however subtle, doesn't pass her by. In a split second she puts two and two together, while 99.9% assured in her conclusion, she still tries to test her theory.
Taking one, two, three steps forward, invading your personal space just enough, tiptoeing the line of intimacy. She asks if you'd like to hear another piece from the same poet, your eager nod confirms her suspicions.
Aglaya adds that the content of this poem is rather sexual, it wouldn't be appropriate for her to speak it out loud in a cathedral now, would it?
So why don't you get closer, allow her to whisper it in your ear. Feel her lips brush against your earlobe, her warm breath tickling your neck for a second, her arm securely wrapped around your waist, keeping you in place by her side.
You're breathless after this one simple act. It's fascinating to her how intense your reaction is to mere foreign words.
The price of the next poem is a kiss. Let her cup your face and indulge in the taste of your lips for her heart's content, pour all of her usually stifled emotions into it.
For the one after that, she asks to feel your heartbeat, to lay her hand against your chest, directly atop your ribcage, and listen to the fragle organ pumping blood. You feel her hands roaming up and down your body.
It gets her off, don't worry about it.
Now how about the two of you move this to her private residence?
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How do you determine what direct action targets are justifiable today?
Ishkah: I’m interested in for example Ted Kaczynski’s effect on the world, I know that he partly inspired a lot of people on the left to take actions under the name Animal Liberation Front and Earth Liberation Front. But, I’m a worried that he’s been a stepping stone to the anti-egalitarian far-right, like that he motivated an affinity group in Mexico called ‘Individualists Tending toward the Wild’ to go from committing arsons aimed at sabotaging evil companies and instead started to desire to have the wider effect of terrorizing people through fear of injury or death on the simple principle of being against technology and wanting to regress to hunter-gatherer societies.
Zerzan: Yeah, if in fact there really was such a group, that’s debatable I guess. They’re kind of a farce. But, whether it’s fictional or not, the fantasy still raises the same questions.
Ishkah: I know Ted Kaczynski has posited the conspiracy that the group is mostly a secret service effort to delegitimize radical groups. But I think for Kaczynski it’s likely a defence mechanism at not wishing such a group to be real and be associated with him or his political tendency.
But, for sure the actions taken under the name could be more reflective of a few individuals across the world who don’t know each other, so not even resembling a group. As well, many of the crimes they claimed to have committed so as to spread fear have been proven not to have happened, which is certainly true.
Zerzan: I’m much more interested in critique than I am in tactics, but to me what’s really at the base of it, as it usually is, is the question of violence. What is violence and what is not violence? And I think my position is rather simple, it’s not violence if it’s not directed at some form of life, in other words you can’t violate a building in my view.
I mean friends of mine might disagree, I mean they would say yes it’s violence and we don’t shrink from violence and that’s a position too.
So, I just think that in general there are a lot of targets and you know I don’t think you can get too far finding answers to that question in the abstract, but I could be wrong.
Ishkah: It’s a complicated problem, I know some websites try to put together an aims and principles list to explain what actions they’ll report on and then I think that can influence what actions people take and what actions people think are justified. [1]
You have people using slogans like ‘by any means necessary’ going all the way back to Malcolm X & Franz Fanon in the 60s, which I guess is an attempt to say we’ll go as far as we’re pushed, so be careful what state terror tactics you use on us.
I’ve experimented with writing up a list of principles for what direct action principles are necessary for different stages in history, in terms of peace time and when social tensions are at their height, [2] of which one principle is; during a non-revolutionary period “never physically hurt people in order to achieve political goals as it runs counter to our philosophy on the left that material conditions create the person and so we should make every peaceful effort to rehabilitate people.” So, what do you think about those as an important foundation?
Zerzan: Well I’ll just mention that Kaczynski did refine his own view on that, I mean he apologized for that early crude bomb on the jetliner, he renounced that. I think the targets were relatively more appropriate as he went along, as they became more lethal, on that level anyway, I think you could argue that that’s the case. [3]
And where is the effectiveness? I mean what success are you having or not having? I mean that can tell you something about what things to do or what things to avoid.”
Ishkah: And what would be the measurements of success for you do you think?
Zerzan: Well, I would say advancing the dialogue. I think that if your thing is mainly critique, it’s a question of the conversation in society, is there some resonance? Is there some interest? Is there some development going on there? In other words, I’m not afraid of certain tactics that people commonly shrink from. and they say well, ‘you’re just turning everybody off’, but sometimes I think you have to go through that stage if you will, I mean sometimes that comes with the territory, in other words, people will be defensive and horrified or whatever at first and then they won’t be. You know? Then it becomes part of the dialogue, you know then things change, they don’t remain the same. In other words, there can be shock at the beginning with some tactics, but that wears off, I think, I would assert that’s likely to be the case.
Ishkah: Right, and you’ve made the comparison between Kaczynski and John Brown in that way. The difference I would say for me though, in those two situations are that John Brown was six years away from the civil war and they were very much accepted at the time to be one of two sides fighting a guerrilla war, one for revolution and the other for conservatism. Kaczynski’s actions were in some ways asymmetrical warfare, but they didn’t have any snowballing effect, they weren’t strategic targets that scared people off from doing what they were doing.
Secondly, Kaczynski’s actions were taken during a non-revolutionary period in which I think physically hurting people to achieve political goals is bad. It’s bad precisely because the conditions weren’t right for revolutionary war.
For example, even if the revolutionary left got really good at assassinating captains of industry and getting away with it, there would be reasonable fears around the psychology of people who would take such an act against people who they could have grown up and been socially conditioned to be themselves, which would inexorably lead to a more authoritarian society and worse foundations on which to work towards a better society.
Zerzan: Well I was quite frankly surprised by the levels of sympathy that were spontaneously expressed in the US in the 90s, I was pleasantly surprised by that. Really, there was much much less horror, or there was horror at the bombings and stuff, but there was also a good deal of sympathy.
Like one case, my wife knew this woman at the business school at the university here, and this person commented on the media footage when they were taking him somewhere in Montana before they moved him to California. And he’s dressed, it’s a well-known deal, he’s got a sport coat on and you can tell he’s got a vest on underneath and he’s kind of looking up at the sky as he’s walking along. And her comment was; “why don’t they just put a cross on his shoulders?” In other words comparing him to Jesus for Christ’s sake, I mean that’s a little unexpected, especially from a rather ‘straight person’, who’s not an anarchist or anything of this sort.”
Ishkah: It was definitely a novel case, that’s for sure. I’m fascinated by Aileen Wuornos case, who was this hitch-hiking sex worker in the 70s, who ended up killing and robbing some of her clients, and it was this weird juxtaposition for the time because women were getting killed all the time by men and so it flipped the script a little bit that there was actually truck drivers who had assaulted or raped women on the road before, who began to be too afraid to pick up women because they were worried about getting killed.
On hearing news on the radio of a woman sex worker killing men, one woman compared the unbelievable experience to the first time Orson Welles’ radio-play ‘The War of The Worlds’ was received by a bemused audience. [4]
So, I’m fine with people finding a lot of value in his philosophy and he’s definitely an intellectual who has found a fairly good critique of modern civilization in 90% of his writings. I just worry that his effect on the world is going to be a stepping stone and to the right for a lot of people, so in terms of discussing his legacy we need to figure out ways to lay down some principles and say that what he did was chaotic and wrong, and we need we need these solid principles for direct action today, to lay the stepping stones for going forward today.’
For example, I know you disagree with random bombings of the ITS tendency, but in terms of people agreeing with your philosophy on what kind of technology is likely bad which is very broad, this idea that any tool that requires a hierarchy of coordination and specialization is something to be avoided, are you not concerned that you could be promoting direct action which falls well outside ethical principles like the ones I laid out in my email to you, such that you run the risk of motivating someone to take direct action which makes your rebellion look insane and so lead people to wish to preserve the status quo or facilitate a move to a more authoritarian society?
I observed some important push back like the Anarchist Federations response to an Informal Anarchist Federation cell kneecapping a nuclear physicist. [5] Critiquing firstly, taking actions based on the conspiratorial anti-industrial beliefs in the over-exaggerated dangers of nuclear meltdowns in stable nations. And secondly, the terroristic nature of attempting to spread fear rather than building social movements and sometimes sabotaging what stands in our way, but always with the goal of winning strategic victories.
Zerzan: Well again, I’d say what is happening in terms of social movements now? I mean there’s very little right now, I could point to the anti-globalization years so-called, you know around 1999 to 2001 which was a pretty considerable thing, it’s kind of forgotten but I mean I don’t know, perhaps Kaczynski’s forgotten.
Ishkah: I still don’t think a strong argument has been given for justifying direct action which attempts to harm or kill people. And so, unfortunately I think for people who take this stance like yourself and Kaczynski, some important disclaimers need to be made whenever discussing your work if – as members of campaign groups, mutual aid networks and affinity groups – we want to recruit and maintain members or advocate others over to our political philosophy.
But, I’m open to you expanding more on this in the future, here for example are a collection of statements made that I take issue with the most, mostly referencing the Unabomber case and including one from this same interview:
“The concept of justice should not be overlooked in considering the Unabomber phenomenon. In fact, except for his targets, when have the many little Eichmanns who are preparing the Brave New World ever been called to account?... Is it unethical to try to stop those whose contributions are bringing an unprecedented assault on life?”
“They ain’t innocent. Which isn’t to say that I’m totally at ease with blowing them into pieces. Part of me is. And part of me isn’t.”
“I think the targets were relatively more appropriate as he went along, as they became more lethal, on that level anyway, I think you could argue that that’s the case.”
“I ended the speech with the suggestion that there might be a parallel between Kaczynski and John Brown. Brown made an anti-slavery attack on the federal arsenal at Harpers Ferry, West Virginia in 1859. Like Kaczynski, Brown was considered deranged, but he was tried and hung. Not long afterward he became a kind of American saint of the abolitionist movement. I offered the hope, if not the prediction, that T.K. might at some point also be considered in a more positive light for his resistance to industrial civilization.”
“Bonanno, it should be added, has been prosecuted repeatedly and imprisoned in Italy for his courageous resistance over the years.” Bonanno was imprisoned for armed robbery and promotes the strategy of kneecapping journalists.
#direct action#anarcho-primitivism#anti-civ#John Zerzan#Post-Anarchism#post-structuralism#Saul Newman#school#social anarchism#solarpunk#vegan#veganarchy#autonomous zones#autonomy#anarchism#revolution#climate crisis#ecology#climate change#resistance#community building#practical anarchy#practical anarchism#anarchist society#practical#daily posts#communism#anti capitalist#anti capitalism#late stage capitalism
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Standing in a seemingly endless line of people donning Harris-Walz branded camouflage hats, pink knit beanies, and “Hotties for Harris” T-shirts, 36-year-old Jenn Cookson was brimming with excitement.
“I’m just a die-hard Kamala fan and Walz fan,” said Cookson, an acquisitions specialist at the U.S. Defense Department, as she waited for U.S. Vice President Kamala Harris’s rally on Tuesday. “I’m not going to lie, when I see her speak today, I’m totally going to cry.”
Emotions are running high among American voters just days before the election on Nov. 5, which polls suggest will be a toss-up between Harris and former U.S. President Donald Trump. Both candidates are making their final pitches to galvanize potential voters—but their target audiences look quite different.
Democrats and Republicans “are now engaged in a battle of the sexes,” said Jennifer Lawless, a political scientist at the University of Virginia. “This is the first time I can remember where they’re really not competing for the same voters at all,” she added.
Gendered voting preferences are nothing new. For decades, women and men in the United States have differed in their political views, with women leaning Democratic over Republican, and young women in particular growing steadily more progressive while their male counterparts have remained the same. That split has been thrown into the spotlight this presidential election—the first since Roe v. Wade was overturned in 2022—as both Harris and Trump champion starkly different visions of womanhood and masculinity on the campaign trail.
“The Democrats are making it about abortion rights and about women’s rights in general,” Lawless said. “The Republicans are making it more about men being left behind and not being sufficiently supported by the Democratic administration.”
That approach has seen Trump’s team, known for its “grab ‘em by the pussy” and “childless cat ladies” comments, lean into hypermasculine messaging and often crude rhetoric about women and gender roles. In just the last few weeks, Trump has praised the size of Arnold Palmer’s genitalia and mocked CNN’s Anderson Cooper, who is gay, by calling him “Allison Cooper.” Last year, Trump was found liable for sexual abuse. Now, he is casting himself as a protector of women—“whether the women like it or not.”
To court upward of tens of millions of largely young male potential voters, Trump has appeared on at least a dozen podcasts and shows with overwhelmingly male audiences, including the immensely popular Joe Rogan Experience. Stephen Miller, a top Trump advisor, built on that kind of messaging in an interview with Fox News, in which he remarked that a vote for Trump would be a stamp of manliness.
“The best thing you can do is to wear your Trump support on your sleeve,” Miller said. “Show that you are a real man. Show that you are not a beta. Be a proud and loud Trump supporter and your dating life will be fantastic.”
It’s a vision of gender roles that stands in sharp contrast to that espoused by Harris, who has made reproductive rights a key feature of her campaign and uses the catchphrase “we are not going back”—including in a campaign ad that nodded to the women’s suffrage movement. Reproductive rights also dominated the conversation when Harris appeared on the popular podcast Call Her Daddy, which has an audience of some 5 million people, most of whom are women under the age of 45.
“We are looking at, I think, different Americas depending on who wins here,” said Christine Matthews, a pollster who has worked for Republican candidates with expertise on swing voters, particularly those who are women. “The question is: Will there be enough women and men who agree that ‘we should not go back’ to propel Kamala Harris to victory?”
If Harris is indeed propelled to victory, she would make history as the United States’ first woman president. But unlike former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who called attention to her gender when she ran for president in 2016, Harris has largely downplayed her identity on the campaign trail.
“Political leaders are always performing their gender,” said Hilary Matfess, a political scientist at the University of Denver’s Josef Korbel School of International Studies whose work focuses on political violence and gender dynamics. “It’s a little bit trickier for women to try and walk that tightrope—demonstrating that they’re strong, and tough, and masculine enough to get the job done without people thinking, ‘Oh, my god. She’s such an unrelatable bitch.’”
Both Trump and Harris are rallying potential voters at a time when younger women across the United States have grown increasingly progressive in the past two decades. But their male counterparts—who tend to tilt conservative over liberal—have not shifted with them.
Those patterns have long guided campaign strategies for Democrats and Republicans. The formula of success for Democrats “is to win women by more than we lose men,” said Celinda Lake, one of the two lead pollsters for the Biden campaign in 2020. “The Republican formula is the opposite: win men by more than they lose women.”
That longstanding gap in presidential voting preferences between men and women largely tracks with what we’re seeing ahead of this election, experts and pollsters said, despite both candidates’ more targeted outreach. “Even though both campaigns are leaning heavily into messaging to one gender or the other, the overall gender gap is well within the norm,” Matthews said.
But those numbers could prove decisive in key swing states, where polls indicate that Harris has stronger support among women, while Trump has stronger support among men. Dawn Teele, a political scientist at Johns Hopkins University, noted there are simply more women in many key battleground counties and that overall women voter turnout is slightly higher than men.
“Even a small preference for the Democrats among women in some of these swing states, in some of these swing counties, can make a difference because there’s more of them,” she said.
Women might broadly lean Democratic, but there remain deep divisions within the demographic, particularly along racial, age, location, and educational lines. Those dynamics were on display in both 2016 and 2020, when the majority of white women voted for Trump.
One such voter is Maureen Sullivan of Hoboken, New Jersey, who made waves in 2016 for penning a New York Times op-ed explaining her decision to vote for Trump. As a white, college-educated, Catholic mother who grew up in a pro-union household, voting for Trump “was an easy choice,” she wrote, citing economic issues, school choice, and how he would “come into office less burdened by party loyalties.”
Sullivan, who said she grew up in a traditional Democratic household but has mostly voted Republican, plans to back Trump again this year. “We’ve seen the world [become] a lot more dangerous place than it was when Trump was president,” Sullivan told Foreign Policy. Under a Trump administration, she would want to see low taxes, a strong economy, and changes with crime and the border, she said.
“I just don’t think [Harris] has what it takes to be president,” said Sullivan, who noted that she watches the news constantly. She likened Harris to an “empty pantsuit.” “I try to find something in her that convinces me that she would make a decent president, and I just haven’t seen it. She can’t speak. She doesn’t seem to have any ideas. She certainly can’t communicate them if she does have ideas.”
A recent poll found that nearly 60 percent of college-educated white women said they will back Harris this election. But 55 percent of white women and 70 percent of white men without college degrees said they will vote for Trump.
And with just a few days to go before the election, both conservative and liberal women are already turning out in force. Women are already outpacing men in battleground states, resulting in a 10-point gender gap in early voting so far, Politico reported.
While waiting in line to hear Harris’s speech on Tuesday, 51-year-old Renee Dotson, who works in local government, said that she was “glad” the Democratic presidential candidate was a woman of color. “But, like, more importantly than her gender and race is the current conditions that we’re facing as Americans right now and how that can really be diminished,” she said.
“We’ve already had a taste of what presidency looks like under this other candidate, and there’s no need to revisit that,” she said. “Nothing good came from it.”
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I feel like today really does prove that any team can win if they play their cards right so people should, to put it crudely, shut the fuck up when complaining about people "targeting teams" when this is literally a highscore battle and you kinda have to go after the only 2 other teams in the competition
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The "Summer of Heat" continues—both in terms of record-breaking temperatures driven by fossil fuels and a series of nonviolent direct actions targeting Wall Street for its contributions to the climate emergency.
After protests last month calling out Citibank for "financing the arsonists," climate campaigners on Friday set their sights on finance and insurance giant AIG for "stubbornly" refusing to join over two dozen other insurers that won't cover the East African Crude Oil Pipeline (EACOP).
EACOP is set to run nearly 900 miles from Uganda's Lake Albert oilfields to the port of Tanga in Tanzania. Rights groups have sounded the alarm about how the project has devastated the lives and livelihoods of people in its path as well as violence endured by African activists, who have been "kidnapped, arbitrarily arrested, detained, or subjected to different forms of harassment."
Ugandan climate activist Hillary Taylor Seguya declared Friday that "EACOP is a carbon bomb being built in my backyard."
"Thousands of communities in Uganda are being displaced because of corporate greed," added the campaigner, who is affiliated with StopEACOP. "Today, as Ugandans, as Tanzanians, as Africans, we want to be loud and clear that we shall not allow any pipeline to put oil in our backyards."
#ecology#enviromentalism#east africa#EACOP#stop eacop#uganda#human rights#tanzania#environmental activism#american international group
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He gets bullied and made fun of for being a weird nerd - I don't think he's getting bullied for being gay.
This really interests me... lots of people think troy's bullying in s1 was also directed at mike, and that becomes part of mike's queercoding. i can see this in a dramatic irony sense, where the audience makes a subconscious connection, but i don't think this was troy's intention. i think he truly was just bullying will for being gay but because will wasnt there he picked on his friends. ofc troy picked on all of them, but it seems like he had his own reasons for each of the boys (frog face etc, established very early in the show) and that will's would have been 'fairy' or 'queer' if he'd been there and not missing.
then cos he was gone, troy found more juice in targeting will and seeing how it riled up his friends cos it was the hot topic of the moment. it also adds to mike's queer invisibility reading. i think i'd be happy with a s5 reveal (the miwi scenes?) of mike being a target of homophobic bullying, but until we see that, i think him being an invisible queer works better for his overall arc. maybe some fans are just trying to find as much evidence as possible for gay mike but quality over quantity, ya know?
Yeah, that's entirely it. All a part of Mike and Will having similar but diverging journies. The difference being visible vs. invisible is so key to that difference. The bullying thing certainly throws people. Because yeah, that was a Will target, specifically. Especially because it's really tied into how the townspeople probably assumed something happened to the kid when he was missing. Hate crime or killed by someone like him. Or taken his own life due to a related reason. Small town rumor and ugliness. It's all so sad when you really think about the implications of things with the supernatural elements removed ☹️
But yeah, its more accurate to assume Troy had his individual reasons for bullying them all, but of course there's gonna be spillover. He's rude and crude, it's not like he's all that refined. And the bigoted bullying of course still happens today but the 80s? A lovely little special flair. Look at how men spoke to each other in any media you watch. So, Troy's probably calling everyone in the Party a fag at some point. The difference being it was/is such a catch all. They're getting called it because they're all nerds and losers to the cruder school population. Will's getting called it because they genuinely think he's queer and that's a terrible thing to be, right? Absolutely contributes to Mike wanting and needing desperately to hide and suppress that part of himself, too.
And imagine the pain in Will everytime his friends hear that stuff said to him. "Don't worry, man. Don't listen to them. We know it's not true." And the knife of the words twists deeper. It's true it's true.
I very much imagine bullying and being targeted is going to be a huge theme in season 5. Maybe even this is where the tides turn and the walls break down further for Mike. Now it's guilty by association. They didn't think it before for him. But something terrible happened and look, that freak Byers kid is back. Maybe Mike will be invisible no longer. We'll have to see. But sadly and realistically for the trajectory of the show - those boys have a big storm coming. 😕
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