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#Colin x afc Richmond
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Is there/can there be a fic where for a team night, Richmond goes to see Deadpool and Wolverine and Collin loses his shit over welshpool?
1) Colin nearly crawls into the lap of whoever is sitting next to him in the theater with excitement.
2) Jamie giving Roy shit about “if the wolverine bloke can still look like that at sixty, what’s your excuse?”
3) after listening to Colin rave about welshpool (and the rest of the team rave about the movie in general), Roy sets up a friendly with wrexham so Colin can meet welshpool.
4) none of the team knows that Roy sets up the meetup but Jamie suspects and is adorable about it.
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happygirl2oo2 · 4 months
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elloras · 1 year
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Ted Lasso: Sunflowers
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trentcrimmisgay · 1 year
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i’ve been clearing out old screenshots in my camera roll but i have ted lasso brain rot so you all have to see what they made me think of (part five. more posts)
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Colin: Jamie, for $1000, would you have sex with Roy?
Jamie: Shit, that’s tough, would I have to pay the thousand all at once or in installments or—
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caslutz · 7 months
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Jamie, coming into the locker room after his date with Roy: Guys, Roy kissed me!
Sam: No way!
Colin: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!
Jamie: It was unbelievable…
Colin: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!!
Isaac: Okay, alright, we wanna hear everything!Sam, unplug the phone. Jamie, does this end well or is Dani going to need tissues?
Jamie: Oh it ended very well.
Richard: Do not start without me! Do not start without me!!
Colin: Alright, let's hear about the kiss. Was it like a soft brush against your lips or was it like a "I gotta have you now" kinda thing?
Jamie: Well, at first it was really intense and then... we just sorta sunk into it...
Sam: So were you holding him or were his hands like on your back?
Jamie: No, actually first he pulled me close to him by grabbing my shirt... and then I moved my hands up to hold his..
Dani: Awww…
*Meanwhile, in the coaches office*
Roy: And then I kissed him.
Beard: Tongue?
Roy: Yeah.
Trent: Cool.
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svld99 · 1 month
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Richmond having a pride night and Isaac giving Colin the captain arm band for the game. Every single one of the himbos in having their pride flag on their kit. Jamie, Sam, Isaac have a bi flag patch Colin has the gay flag. Jan definitely has an ace flag. Ted and Roy also have a little bi flag pinned to this jackets for the game. Trent handles the press for the game and hand picks who gets to be in the press room.
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The hour that people are least prepared to defend themselves, according to Roy Kent: 4 am
The hour in which Roy made Jamie wake up to train: 4 am
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secretnook · 1 year
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this is a part 2 to my last post because I still have too many of these on my phone also I miss this show with my whole being🫡
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theageofcaravel · 1 year
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Rose-Coloured Boy. - Jamie Tartt x F!reader
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┊ ┊ ┊ ┊
MASTERLIST
Chapter I: Reeling Through the Midnight Streets
Plot: Jamie Tartt and Y/N have been best friends since primary school. The pair had fallen out once graduation hit, both of them going their separate ways; Jamie finally kicking off (pun intended) his football career, and Y/N finally walking through the doors of her cinematographer career. One day, they cross paths in the corridors of Nelson Road, Y/N getting the assignment to make a mini docuseries of one of the football clubs in England, hers being AFC Richmond.
Set during season 2 and onward.
warnings: swearing, mentions of food and alcohol
word count: 3,7k
an: HELLOOOOOO!!! im excited to write this, I'm so late to the Ted Lasso wagon, but here I am. I got the idea for this story when I was sat on my couch looking through Pinterest and then I made a board for it. This has also taken me a few days to crank out because I've second guessed the plot a couple of times but anyway, I'm watching Cody and Noel's Love Island series and its reminding me of that one episode in season 2. LMAO, enjoy <3!!!!
┊ ┊ ┊ ┊
Breathing in deeply, you closed your notebook. Looking up at your professor, you gently rapped your manicured nails upon your desk and eagerly waited to see which football club you were going to be assigned to. The hope in your chest wanted to get your hometown's very own club, having a plausible excuse to visit your home, without your parents getting under your skin.. 
"Y/N L/N," Professor Loughty called out your name, you quickly stood from your desk and grabbed your belongings. "Yes, sir?" you asked, an eager glimmer in your eyes. "you're gonna be in charge of AFC Richmond, I've emailed Miss Welton and have gotten the approval for you to leave right after I dismiss you, there should be a cab right outside for you. you're going to have to find which one is yours." 
With a solemn nod, you breathed in, "is there any way that I could have Manchester City, perchance?" all Professor Loughty replied with a shake of his head, "sorry, Miss L/N, all final decisions have been made." 
"Alright, thank you, professor." you nodded again. 
"You are dismissed." 
Making your way out of the classroom, you sighed disappointedly. All you really wanted was to spend time with your sister, Libby. Your built-in best friend, the person who you call often to just ramble, vent, or see how life on the other side is. 
A chime of your phone pulled you out of your thoughts. 
any updates?
Libby. So much for getting pulled out of your thoughts. 
yeah, got Richmond :/ BUT I promise I'll make it up to you. I'll visit soon. 
:( okayyy I love youu
"Y/N!" pocketing your phone, your attention was now averted from your patronising thoughts to that of your best friend. "Bee! Hey." you smiled and waited for your friend to fully approach you. 
"Who'd ya end up gettin'?" the Irish girl asked in her usual chipper tone. 
"Richmond, I wanted Man City." 
She scrunched her nose. "Mmm, ain't that the team with that American coach?" Bee added with a raise of her eyebrows. 
"Think so, so I guess it's not all bad.. could be interesting.." You spoke with a shrug which only earned you a light chuckle from the brunette. "Well, I'd certainly hope so. you have to be around him and the team for how long?" 
"'Til the end of the semester." 
Bee nodded at your reply. "sounds miserable." 
"Oh, piss off. Don't you have to write an album by the end of the semester?" you clapped back, causing Bee to only snicker with a shrug. 
"Yeah, but that's easy."
"Right, as if you haven't been in a song writing block for the past month or so." freezing in her place, Bee shook her head and glared playfully at the other. 
"Exactly. Anyway, I've gotta get going, gotta get my essentials." you said to Bee, embracing her in a hug. "See y'tomorrow?"
The taller girl nodded and walked away with a wave. "See ya, nugget." 
You shook her head, that nickname was never going to go away. Walking your merry way over to the line of cabs, you nervously talked to the first cabbie. "Um, which one is the one for Y/N L/N?" you asked and gripped your books close as if they were some sort of security blanket. The man behind the wheel grunted and pointed to the one behind him. 
"Should be that one down there, yeah." he replied and basically shooed the girl away. with a breath, you found the cab you were supposedly assigned and sat in the backseat. 
"Was ordered to head to your place, where to miss?" The driver asked with a kind smile in which you replied with your address.
┊ ┊ ┊ ┊
Unlocking your door quickly, you ran into your living room and grabbed your bag full of all the necessities you needed for the months ahead of you; camera, clip in microphones, etcetera. Richmond was only 30 minutes away, which, in hindsight, was better than having to travel four hours per weekend. 
With no second thought, you grabbed your water bottle and slung your bag over your shoulder. Taking one last look around, you let out a satisfied huff and headed back outside to the car.
"Alright, Miss L/N, we're headed to Richmond. s'about a 30 minute drive from here." the cabbie, who you learned that his name was Franklin, 'frank for short,' is what he told you, said. He was a nice old man, probably in his early sixties. He was good at keeping up the small talk, asking you about what it is that you’re going to be doing with Richmond. Telling you that before he was a cab driver he was a guitarist in a band, a small one at that. You both bonded over music, You telling him that your best friend is a singer and that sometimes Bee'll get you together to mess around because you have been playing the guitar since you were little but never really pursued anything musically because it wasn't of interest. 
Eventually Frank had pulled into Nelson Road, the drive seemed a lot faster than it really was because of how easy it was to talk. 
"Thank you, Frank. I'll see you at 5, right?" You asked and the older man nodded. "Have a good rest of your day." You saluted him and walked up to the doors of the stadium. Slinging your bag over your shoulder, you entered the building. 
Absentmindedly walking down the corridors, you looked around at the walls and folded your arms across your chest looking at the trophy wall; all the history and old photos of Richmond littered within it.
"Excuse me?" a voice spoke from behind you, startling you slightly. You were met with a grin from a lanky looking boy. "Are you lost?" he asked and you only shrugged.
"Guess you could say that." you chuckled awkwardly and lifted your shoulders. "Um, I'm looking for Miss Welton's office. Got lost in thought though." 
"Ohhhh, are you Y/N L/N?" the boy asked with a head tilt. In which you responded with a nod. "I can show ya where to go, follow me." he moved slightly before the other nodded and followed behind him. 
"Are you the.." you started, "kit... man?" knitting your eyebrows together and stuffing your hands into your jacket's pockets.
"Yeah, I am." he nodded and grinned and stopped at the door to Rebecca's office. "Well, this is it. I'm Will by the way." he said and stuck out his hand for you to shake. You took his hand thankfully. 
"Thank you, Will. It was nice to meet you. I'll see you around, yeah?" You waved him goodbye and gently knocked on the slightly open door. 
"Come in," a voice shouted, the nerves finally kicking in. Pushing the door open, you were greeted with a warm smile from probably the most beautiful woman you had ever seen. "Hello."
"Errr, hi." you awkwardly smiled, "I'm--"
"Y/N, I've been expecting you." Miss Welton cut the other off, that smile that she held never fading. "Come, sit." she gestured to the chair opposite from her desk. You nodded and set your bag on the floor. 
"Okay, um, hi." an awkward smile wavered over the girl's features. Rebecca leaned into her desk, automatically drawn to the way you were acting; that shell she knew she needed to crack.
"Promise I don't bite." the blonde jested which caused you to somewhat get comfortable. "Anyway, we're excited to have you. the boys have been raving about having a cinematographer here to film their every move." 
"Thank you for the opportunity, Miss Welton." 
"Call me Rebecca."
"Okay.. thank you for the opportunity, Rebecca." you corrected yourself which earned an approving nod and smile from the other. "I'll be here every other day after the school day, during the weekends, and during every game. Even travelling ones, I got the okay from my professors when we learned that this assignment existed."
Rebecca nodded, knowing said information but not wanting to interrupt the girl. "You don't have to start right away, if you want I can introduce you to the boys and everyone else." 
With a nod, you pushed herself up off the chair and reached for your bag. "you can leave that in here, we’ll be coming back in here to discuss everything needed.” 
┊ ┊ ┊ ┊
"This is where the boys have physio, you shouldn't have to come here." The pair chuckled and then Rebecca stopped by a blue door where chatter could be heard inside. "and this is the kit room, where the boys change and where the coaches offices are." 
“It smells like sweaty ass in here, just warning you.” the blonde jested, causing you to scrunch her nose. "Shall we?" she asked and you nodded. With a gentle knock on the door Rebecca peeked in. "Everyone decent?" she asked, to which all the boys replied in unison with a 'yes'. smiling contently, the taller lady pushed the door open and pushed you in front of her. 
"OI." she announced, "everyone this is, Y/N L/N, our cinematographer from the University of London." everyone cheered happily, most just yelling what sounded like mixes of 'LETS GOOOO', 'FUCK YEAH', and 'WICKED'. 
At the sound of a familiar name being called, Jamie looked up and went wide eyed. Holy fuck.  
Quickly standing up from where he was sitting, you both made eye contact. Brows knitted together, your eyes looked above his head, the words, ‘TARTT’ in big bold letters made you realise that your suspicions were correct. “No way, Jamie?” you asked and breathed out. 
The entirety of the room suddenly went quiet, or so it seemed. You apprehensively walked toward him, Rebecca watching you with a look of confusion. Maybe you were just a fan that he’s seen from time to time? No, that wasn’t the case and she knew it the moment you guys both stared at each other with some form of intensity from you and an apologetic look from him. You looked like you wanted to walk over to him and smack him across his face and he looked like he wanted to wrap his arms around you and tell you how sorry he was. 
“I–” Jamie started and made his way closer to you, you dryly chuckled. 
“No, I just got here, we can talk later.” 
He nodded at your cross response and backed away. You introduced yourself and learned everyone’s names, the coaches were in their office in some sort of meeting and Rebecca told you that you’d be able to meet them later. 
┊ ┊ ┊ ┊
Back up in Rebecca’s office, you both went over how you were planning on filming. Going over recording some of the boys separately in their element, interviews, etcetera. You also learned that Rebecca was really easy to talk to, like a best friend. 
“Alright, Y/N, I must ask,” Rebecca started, handing you a cup of tea. “Back in the locker room, what was that with you and Jamie?” taking the cup and bringing it to your lips, you sighed. 
“We go way back, we met back in primary school and we were attached at the hip up until high school. There were moments when our close friends suspected we were a couple.” You trailed off, “but once we graduated everything just kind of.. Fell off, we both went our separate ways. I tried to get back into contact with him but he would say that he was busy or he’d just flat out ignore me.” you looked over at Rebecca to see her eyebrows raised. 
“Sorry, that’s kinda personal innit? Haven’t known each other much.” you said and she just shrugged. 
“It’s alright, we’re gonna be getting rather close these next few months, it's a good start for now.” she responded to you, the worry that was on your face was slowly replaced by a warm smile. 
“Guess you’re right.” 
“‘Course I am, Y/N. ‘Course I am.” 
You chuckled and shook your head, taking another sip of your tea. “On another note, I’m quite excited for all of this. Richmond is already so .. nice. I felt welcome the moment I walked in.”
“It does that to you, wait until you meet Ted though, you’ll feel even more welcome.”
As if on cue, there was a gentle knock on the door followed by a man with a moustache walking inside with a beaming grin, “well, howdy y’all.” he greeted. You smiled up at him and stood from your seat, placing your halfway finished mug down on the coffee table. 
“Y/N, this is Ted.” Rebecca said. You stuck your hand out for him to shake. 
“Nice to meet you, Ted.” You said and he only beamed at you. 
“Welcome to the family, Y/N/N.” he replied, your eyes went wide at the sudden nickname. “Its okay if I call you that right? Only seems right with your name.” He chuckled and you nodded. 
“Only if I get to call you ‘Teddy’ or somethin’. What's Ted short for anyway?” You asked him, the shift in your demeanour from earlier was like you’ve been here for weeks. “Theodore.” Rebecca chimed in and you grinned over at her and crossed your arms over your torso. “Hmm, then ‘Theo’ will have to do.” 
Ted, or Theo smiled from ear to ear. “Glad to hear it, I’ll see y’around.” 
You waved the man goodbye and sighed happily. Rebecca stood up from her spot on the sofa and brushed her dress out. “Alright, so, now that we’ve gone over everything, is there anything that you need before you head out for the rest of the day?” she asked you and you shook your head to look down at your watch. 
“Nah, I think I’m good.” You said and walked over to where your bag was. “Didn’t even need this today, came over prepared.” chuckling lightly, you leaned down to pick it up. 
“Thank you again for being so warm and welcome,” you looked at Rebecca and held your hand out for her to shake it. She took your hand happily, “I’ll see you next week then, to start your work process?” she asked you and you nodded. 
“Mhm, yep, and I’ll have everything we went over.” you smiled at her and then bid her farewell. 
Walking out of her office and down the stairs you were met with a waiting Jamie, his phone in his hands in a way to distract him. When he heard your footsteps hitting the stairs, he pocketed his device and looked up at you. 
“You waited for me.” you said with a raised brow and he nodded. 
“Yeah..” he started and you stood in front of him. “I just wanted to .. dunno, apologise?” 
“For what? Leaving me alone to think you forgot about me for six years? D’you think I’m just gonna walk right into your arms and accept your apology?” you spat and he took it in. you looked like a wounded puppy and he just wanted to fling forward and hold you. To tell you that everything was gonna be alright and that he wouldn’t dream of doing that to you again. 
“Right, right. Yeah, m’sorry ‘bout that.” he looked down at his trainers and nervously gripped his body bag’s strap. “D’ya think we could.. Dunno, go for a walk and talk ‘bout it all?” he asked you, a plea in his eyes. 
“I can’t. I have to go back to London, my cabbie is waiting for me.” you replied and rocked on your heels.
“What about when you come back?”
“Dunno, I don’t think I wanna hear some bullshit excuse as to why you left me in the dust.”
“Please, Y/N.” he pleaded, “we don’t even have to talk for long. If you decide that you don’t want anything to do with me or listen then you can walk away.” 
You sighed in defeat, “fine.”
He nodded, trying to hide the victorious smile on his lips but failing. 
“Wipe that smug grin off your ugly mug before I do it for you.” 
“Aye aye.” Jamie responded, that was the Y/N he knew all those years back, and you walked away with a sigh and a shake of your head. 
God this was so fucking weird. 
┊ ┊ ┊ ┊
Once the next week rolled around, you told Bee how you bumped into Jamie, whom you might’ve told her about once or twice.. Or a few times whilst drunk. Telling her stories about how you were, “sooooooo mad at him for ghosting me like that. I loved him ssooooo much and he goes and does that.”
At 10am, Frank pulled into the car park of Nelson Road and you bid him farewell when gathering your belongings. You walked inside, instantly greeted with that family-like haze. A smile wafted on your features, nodding in acknowledgement at whomever passed by. 
“Good morning, Y/N/N!” Ted said when you walked by him on your way up to Rebecca’s office. “Mornin, Theo.” you smiled at him and gave him a high five. 
The rest of the morning went pretty well – You and blondie, new nickname (Ted approved),  going over what you guys went over on your first day, you setting up everything you needed, using one of the meeting rooms as a place to have special interviews for the boys when the time came and making a makeshift desk of one of the tables for when you needed to edit or when you when you weren’t filming. 
When lunch time approached, Rebecca asked if you wanted to join her, but you told her that you wanted to make sure that everything was working properly because once everyone was back from the lunch break you were going to record the first of many parts of the boys’ training. She gave you a thumbs up and you were on your merry way to set up a camera outside. 
“Headed outside?” a familiar Mancunian accent asked you, you stopped in your tracks and turned toward the voice. 
“Mhm, yep.” You said, your change in demeanour going from steadfast wanting to get the hell out.
“Need help?” he asked you, a pleading look in his eyes. You looked down at the gadgets you had in your hands. Setting said things up on your own would not be easy, especially when you don’t have a whole crew to help you with lighting and every other necessity that came with filming.
With a defeated sigh, there was really no point in doing it on your own when the other offered help, you looked at him. “That would.. Be nice,” you started, trailing off, “but aren’t you supposed to be at lunch with the guys or somethin’? Don’t wanna be a bother or anythin’, I’m sure I can manage on my own.”
“Nah, s’no problem. Promise.” he placed his hand on his chest, “Not really hungry anyhow.” he nodded and stepped in front of you to open the door out to the pitch. 
“Thanks.” You said and smiled at him thankfully. He nodded and you looked around. 
“Hmm, hey, Jamie?” you asked, and he turned to you with his eyebrows up. “Where d’ya reckon would be the best spot to film?” 
He pointed to a spot beside where he said that Ted and Beard usually stand and watch, “You can practically see everything from here, but you might have to change directions of the camera every now and then.” 
You shrugged and leaned down to unpack your best camera for the outdoors, “that’s fine, its my job anyway.” you set up your tripod and turned your camera on. Looking into the lens, you adjusted the lighting. 
“So, Y/N..” Jamie said and stood in front of your camera with some sort of lopsided grin, “D’ya think we could do that talk right now?” 
You looked up and huffed, “dunno, are you gonna get out of my way?” he shrugged and moved from the focus. “What is there to really talk about anyway? You ghosted me for years. You didn’t even wish me a happy birthday, or send christmas cards.” With one final twist of your lens you stepped away and looked at Jamie who scratched his neck. 
“Yeah, don’t really have an excuse for that. Other than being a professional footballer ‘n all.”
“Yeah, but you still could’ve said something, that's not really a valid excuse.” you replied and gave him a stern look. “Remember what I said about bullshit excuses, Tartt?”
“Wait, no,” he looked at you with a panicked look. “There's really nothin’ that excuses me actions, but please know that I am sorry. I haven’t forgotten about you all these years, y’know.”
“Then why the fuck did you stay silent for so many years? I gave up trying to reach out to you after my twenty - first birthday. Tried seein’ if you wanted to come celebrate and maybe catch up and you NEVER responded.” you placed your hands on your hips and you could see the guilt written all over his face. 
“Yeah.” you responded, “but I’m an adult and I ended up forgiving and forgetting until the universe decided to have us cross paths again.” you half jested, Jamie’s lips curling upward just a tinge. “How about I make you a deal?” 
He quirked his brows up and you responded with a sigh. “I will forgive you.” you said and watched as his face changed from curious to excited. “If,” you paused, only egging him on, “you promise that it won't happen again, even after this project is done and over with.” 
Looking at him expectedly, the brunet stepped forward and engulfed you in a bone crushing hug, the only kind he’d give you after something good happened or after you had a meltdown in front of him. “Cross me heart, Y/N.” 
You smiled against his shoulder and hugged him back briefly, only to pull away and stick out your pinky. “Pinky promise me, James.” you said, the full name throwing him off slightly. He intertwined your fingers and you both leaned down to press kisses to your thumbs, sealing the deal. 
“Pinky promise.”
┊ ┊ ┊ ┊
Alright, STINKIES!!!!!! Let me know if you wanna be on the tag list n stuff!! I'll try to get a few more chapters out this week! They'll probably be a bit shorter, some fillers, some not, etcetera!! ANYWAY!! Thank you for reading <3
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milfloverobisanya · 1 year
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jamie: from now on, we will be using code names. you can address me as eagle one.
jamie: keeley, code name: been there, done that
jamie: dani is: currently doing that
jamie: colin is: it happened once in a dream
jamie: roy, code name: if i had to pick an old guy
jamie: isaac is eagle two
isaac: oh thank god
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happygirl2oo2 · 4 months
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elloras · 11 months
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trentcrimmisgay · 1 year
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i’ve been clearing out old screenshots in my camera roll but i have ted lasso brain rot so you all have to see what they made me think of (part one. more posts)
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laiqualaurelote · 1 year
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Ted Lasso fics masterlist
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it’s not about the wins or losses, it’s about the fandom we made along the way - and that, I think, is what I’ll miss the most
meanwhile, a masterlist of all my Ted/Trent fics:
1. The Truth Shall Make Ye Fret (T, 20k)
“Thing is, though, you gotta love the questions themselves. I guess you journalists don’t get the luxury of that, seeing’s how you gotta rush your stories out - y’all just want your answers right off the bat. But I think you gotta live the questions first. Then one day you’ll gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.”
Trent takes off his glasses. “Ted Lasso, did you just quote Rilke at me?”
Ted shrugs modestly.
“I take it back,” says Trent. “You don’t need media training at all.”
In 48 hours, Trent Crimm lands a scoop, implodes his career and makes some drastic life decisions. And then there's the aftermath. And Ted, of course.
2. they will see us waving from such great heists (T, 21k)
“Well, like the Gambler himself says - you got to know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em. Know when to walk away, know when to run. And the latter would be about now, because I think this house is on fire.” 
In which Trent Crimm, Interpol, investigates the theft of Rupert Mannion’s painting by a mysterious thief dubbed The Greyhound. FBI Special Agent Ted Lasso gets in the way. Heist!AU
2a. Trick Plays (T, 6.4k)
Snippets from the Such Great Heists universe, including Crimminal Intent, The Prying Dutchman and We Provide Leverage.
3. constant as a northern star (constantly in the dark) (T, 10.5k)
“I just met Ted Lasso,” Sachiko Crimm says bluntly when her ex-husband picks up.
Trent is silent for a while. “And?” he says finally.
Sachiko gives it five seconds, and then she bursts out laughing.
“Stop it,” says Trent wearily.
The saga of Trent Crimm and his independent ex-wife
4. all the men and women merely players (T, 50k)
"So let me get this straight. You, an American whose career highlights consisted mainly of appearing on Saturday Night Live, decide in the wake of the apocalypse to lead a touring Shakespeare company across the ruins of England."
"Oh, I know. Heck, I said as much to Rebecca when she suggested it. I said, 'You could fill two Internets with what I don’t know about directing Shakespeare.' And she said, 'Ted, the Internet doesn’t exist any more.'"
Trent Crimm meets Ted Lasso by chance at a Shakespeare play. Five years and the end of the world later, they meet again at another. A Station Eleven post-apocalyptic theatre AU (no knowledge of Station Eleven necessary to read), WIP but updating real soon!
It’s been an honour to write for this fandom, I love you all so very much (on three!)
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caslutz · 7 months
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Sometime during season one…
Roy, from the showers: OI EVERYBODY! SHOWERS NOW!
Colin: What’s up, captain?
Isaac: What did Jamie do now?
Jamie: I didn’t do anything, I promise!
Roy, holding up a blue towel: Is someone playing a joke on me? Honestly, why is my towel ALWAYS DAMP!?
Jamie: Well, that’s because it’s not your towel; it’s my towel, Roy.
Roy: No, it’s not your towel. Your towel is the red one!
Jamie: I’ll tell you this mate; I have never used that red towel. I do use *points at the blue towel* that one everyday.
Roy: Oh god…
Dani, holding the red towel to his cheek: This towel is so warm and fluffy. It is like it has been in the sun forever.
Isaac: This means you two have been drying your junk with the same towel.
Colin: Intimate.
Roy, to Jamie: Are you out of your mind!?
Jamie: What do you mean am I—
Roy: How do you think this is your towel!? Do you even wash it??
Jamie, scoffing: No I don’t wash the towel; the towel washes me. Pfft, who washes a towel?
Sam: You never wash…?
Jamie: You guys wash your towels!?
Roy: YOU NEVER WASH THE TOWEL?!
Jamie: What am I going to do? Wash the shower next!?
Roy: *gags in disgust*
Jamie: Wash a bar of soap?! You gotta think here, grandad!
The Greyhounds: *looks at Jamie in disgust*
Roy: I AM FURIOUS RIGHT NOW!
Jamie: I GET OUT OF THE SHOWER, I’M CLEAN AS A DAMN BABY, AND I USE MY TOWEL!!
The Greyhounds: *leave the shower room*
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