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The Key to Releasing Attachment
Recognizing and releasing unhealthy attachments is the biggest step in the journey of self-improvement, self-love, and self-actualization. Attachments are the source of pain in our lives.
At its core, an attachment originates from the belief that something outside of ourself possesses that which we lack internally. Often, this belief traces back to childhood, where abandonment or abuse birthed feelings of inadequacy, shame, and the pursuit of conditional love.
We begin to craft narratives around our attachments, convincing ourselves that certain external people or circumstances hold the key to our happiness and safety. We desperately cling to things, believing that they are the only way to secure our well being.
When we lack validation and safety from ourselves, chasing those things externally is the only way that we know how to obtain them. In this pursuit we unknowingly abandon the self, altering behaviors, suppressing vulnerability, compromising on boundaries - all in an attempt to retain control over the external factors validating our experience. Slowly, we lose ourselves - our values, emotions, and directions.
Acknowledging the narratives that we construct, recognizing the unhealthy patterns that we may be repeating, and owning up to self-abandonment is how we dissolve these things.
The root of our attachment to external factors lies in our inner child's need for validation and safety. To rectify this, we turn inwards, towards self-love. Inwards, we recognize that we are whole. We show ourselves that we will no longer abandon the self, and we build safety and groundedness. We provide the love and safety that we always looked for externally. We realize that everything we've ever needed resides within. When we create feelings of safety and love within ourselves, we know that we do not need anything or anyone. Authenticity becomes how we no longer abandon the self. We know that we do not need to minimize ourselves for anything, because we can provide everything that we have ever needed on the inside.
This allows us to let go of attachment and outcomes. Letting go of outcomes allows us to be fully authentic and to attract the correct experiences into our lives. We attract the right people and experiences from a place of true authenticity. We know that we do not need anything, so these people and experiences only add to our life.
Love for the people in our lives which is rooted in authenticity and detachment from outcomes is unconditional. The key to releasing attachment is in your hands. Create safety and validation for yourself, and choose to not abandon the self. Consciously select your own energy and your own mind for validation, and you will feel more free than ever. :)
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