#Cas writes a lot

[bloodydeanwinchester]

soooooo incheresting. i just watched a video that counted all the times dean said cas and castiel through out the series and it kept a count of the castiel's separate. he said castiel a total of 16 times throughout the whole series and SIX of those times were in season 6!!!! and every single one of those in season 6 was dean praying to him. which notably none of the other castiel's were part of a prayer. god dean is just like....pining for cas so hard in season 6 and after they stopped the apocalypse it's like castiel just drifted so far away from him and he got all powerful again and dean KNOWS that something is going on with him but cas is just keeping him at such a distance (because he's trying to protect him from everything going on with heaven's civil war). so suddenly when dean's praying even when he's making a joke of it (which is often) he's saying castiel instead of cas.

[dogearedheart]

At The End Of All Things

"You know, Dean, I–" Cas pauses, his brows furrow. "I don't want you to feel like you have to carry this all on your own, because you don't. We're all stuck here. We are all hopeless and scared, and– I know it isn't much, but...I am glad it's us." "Yeah, I– me too, man. Me too." And who was Dean to want more than this? - or - The world is ending, and there is nothing Dean can do about it, but he isn't alone. He has Cas. They have each other. Dean just needs a little time. Because this story is, above all else, about hope.

Read more on Ao3

if you want to read a story about Dean and Cas at the end of the world tiptoeing around their feelings until they don't? well, this is the fic for you.

Snippet under the cut:

Dean tries to ignore the disappointment that leaks into his bones when he arrives and realizes that the lights in the cabin aren't on yet. He shakes his head and laughs at himself. This is ridiculous. Dean closes the door behind him and turns on the lights. It takes a few moments before the lightbulb in the middle of the ceiling turns on with a faint click. 

The place is decent. Most of the cabins have a similar layout, a big living room with a small kitchenette situation, a bathroom, and a bedroom or in Dean's case two bedrooms. They had managed to make themselves at home the best they could with what they had, and living with Cas turned out to be much easier than Dean had thought. In the shelter of these walls, it almost felt like they were living a normal life. Cas and Dean had spent hours on their shared sofa, planning and researching ways to stop the end of the world, but they'd also spent an equal amount of hours just talking, drinking, and simply... being. Dean justified their little roommate situation as something necessary for them to make progress in their big plan to get Sam back. So sharing a cabin with Cas had been, above all, a matter of convenience. 

"Are you going to stand there all night?"

Dean jumps slightly at the sound of the voice he'd recognize anywhere. "Jesus- fuck, Cas!" He puffs before turning around. Dean catches sight of his friend's silhouette – all broad shoulders and messy hair – in a corner of the room. 

"You look terrible." 

Dean can hear the amusement in Cas' voice as he pushes himself from where he is currently leaning against the doorframe of their bathroom. He walks a few steps in Dean's direction, and Dean moves without thinking, meeting Cas halfway, taking him in a tight embrace. Cas returns the hug without hesitation, and Dean feels his body relax against strong and comforting arms. On instinct, he buries his face in the crook of Cas' neck and takes a deep breath. Cas smells like cedar wood and smoke, he smells like soil and sweat.

Dean is finally home. 

"Good to see you too, man. You look–" Dean begins, but stops when he gets a better look at Cas under the artificial light of their kitchen. He glimpses at the dried blood on Cas' temple, then the black eye, and his busted bottom lip. 

He grabs Cas' shoulders, maybe a little too roughly, "Woah, what the fuck happened to you, man?" 

Cas just shrugs, eyes tired, but a soft smile adorning his lips. He loosens his grip around Dean's shoulders and takes a step back, his hands falling to his sides. The loss makes Dean frown, his hands move up on their own accord. It takes him a second to realize what he is doing, but when he does, Dean relaxes his face and crosses his hands over his chest. He leans against the kitchen counter behind him instead. 

Smooth, Winchester. Real smooth.

[bibliosims]

bonus kalei pics

[locke-esque-monster]

I feel like we don't talk nearly enough about how interesting "Houses of the Holy" is as a Supernatural episode. Because a lot of it is a template to where the show will be in a couple seasons, when at the time it was written, angels weren't in the show's plans.

And sure, this is the episode that foreshadows Sam pointing at something just behind Dean and confirming it's Michael. And that alone is a delight.

But let's talk about other interesting aspects of the episode:

The origin of Dean's skepticism of faith from all the evil he's seen from the age of 4 on, contrasted with Sam's desire to hold onto faith so he can be saved due to his link to the YED.

Dean and Sam's argument about faith and things you can see and believe in that has a lot in common with the one in 4x2.

Sam desperately wanting angels to fix problems or redeem him. And him being disappointed in the reality of that, a lot like 4x7.

Dean's argument of how he knows nothing is watching over them because all you can count on is evil and chaos is the root of his fight with Cas in 4x2.

Then there's the fact that Sam is judging Dean for his pursuit of pleasure. Despite that, Sam feels he's the one that needs saving. And Dean despite his love of vice, is the stand-in for the angels. He's the avenging angel of this episode, making sure the woman is okay and chasing after the bad buy. And he literally says he's watching over Sam at the end to reassure him when Sam is hurt because this wasn't an angel case. Dean doesn't think there are real angels around, but he's determined to be the angel in someone else's life - whether it be Sam's or someone else's.

And then there's the way the bad guy is killed with a pole at the end, "Final Destination" style. I can't help but wonder, did the angels do that? We spent a whole episode talking about faith. Was this to test the boys and see how they'd react to angels a little before they gear up for Sam's death at season's end? And long term, feel them out before they put their plan into action for the apocalypse? Was Father Gregory something they "helped along" somehow to lure the boys to town? There's a theory Gabriel lured them to scope them out in "Tall Tales" a couple episodes later. Who's to say the angels didn't do the same thing (maybe even inspiring Gabe)? Or perhaps the angels just take advantage of the situation since they were already watching the boys long-term? And moving the pole was as much to protect Dean as it was to see his reaction and if that would sway his lack of faith? Or was an angel (like Cas) watching over Dean and interfered to ensure his safety in the car chase? And maybe even wanted to show off a little?

I don't know. But it sure is fun to contemplate.

[purgaytorysupremacy]

oh nuts. a life experience has given me a new layer of perspective on Cas's homosexual declaration of love to Dean.

recently I had occasion to tell a person I had feelings for them knowing full well they didn't feel even a twinge of the same thing for me. while the whole thing was a decidedly unpleasant experience, I kept laughing at myself internally bc I didn't want to say "the happiness is just in saying it" like fucking Castiel over here. (we don't need to talk about it, it's fine.) (I am happier having said it and it's kind of bullshit, but I digress.)

because the thing is, the happiness isn't in just saying it, right? the happiness is in the having. I made a whole TikTok "proving" that the Empty didn't come for Cas when he confessed his love, but rather when he realized Dean loved him back. even for Cas, the happiness was in the having, not in the saying, however brief it was.

and I've always been one of those people who rolled their eyes at the whole concept. why would the happiness be in just being, in just saying it, if it's right there in front of you to have. and then it hit me like a tonne of bricks (as I was washing my kitchen counters).

Cas really didn't think he could have Dean.

at all. in any capacity. he really, truly, and honestly felt to the depths of himself that Dean did not have any twinge of similar feelings, that this really was a Hail Mary shot-in-the-dark. and I think me, personally, really didn't understand that about Cas. that his belief in his love being unrequited was that unshakable.

something else I've been pondering is how audiences have so much more empathy for fictional characters who share traits that IRL they find objectionable and unappealing. but the thing is about fictional characters is that we follow them around in their most private, vulnerable moments. we see Dean mourning Cas when he dies, literally killing himself because he can't live without him, but it's so easy to forget that we're the omniscient ones here.

Cas never knew.

Dean's whole thing was pushing him away, keeping him at arm's length, making it seem like whatever heroic thing he does for Cas he'd do for anyone. he downplays how important it is for Dean to share the Deancave with him, to show him his favourite movies, share his favourite songs. he acts like the things Cas does for him don't mean that much to hide how much they do mean. he uses "we" whenever he even gets in the vicinity of expressing a feeling. "We were worried." "We're glad you're back." "We needed a win." "You're our brother." The audience knew the difference. We saw how he'd clench his jaw or swallow hard or make a face that said "God, I'm being such an idiot". Because we saw him in those little moments. We got to see the cracks in the mask.

but Cas never knew.

the self-hating angel of Thursday was never going to think it was all a way for Dean to protect himself. obviously, that's the delicious tragedy of it all, but what I think I realized at the end of all that is Cas confessing his love to a Dean who didn't love him back wouldn't have worked. Because the happiness really is in the having. If happiness was just in saying it, then The Empty would have come before Cas even finished getting the words out of his mouth.

so Cas's plan wouldn't have worked if Dean didn't love him back.

this is just me yapping on about my own nonsense, but I do think it's really interesting. there's contentment in "just saying it". there's freedom and relief and an unburdening. I think one can argue that it makes being happy in the being easier. there is certainly some joy in telling a person you think that highly of them. but true happiness?

nah.

true happiness is always going to only be in the having. Cas didn't understand the difference until he experienced it, and by then, it was too late.

[wanderingcas]

look i know i have another wip going on right now but i also just outlined this deep dive of dean's character fic and wrote 3 more chapters so like....... this may have to come to light sometime soon

[angelsdean]

they literally had him dance with a lamp. A LAMP. when light fixtures have been symbolically used to represent angel halos thru out the show. when they could've just had dean dance with garth or some random anonymous lady or literally any other inanimate object. i can't find the original post but the dance is based off a scene from an old film and in it i think they use a broom or mop. but for dean they chose *lamp* !!!!!!!! these are deliberate choices that mean things dude !!!!! LAMP !!!!! [screams incoherently into pillow]

[kacievvbbbb]

The thing is that Dean and his abandonment issues wants Castiel to stay, despite the fuck ups and the blame and the anger, he needs him to stay as proof that he’s not toxic that he can have good things and not break them

But Castiel, and his guilt chose to leave because that is his penance. Why does he deserve to be happy when he has caused so much suffering? How can he look at Dean smile at him when he’s fucked up so much? He needs to leave because how could he be around Dean like he isn’t a living monument to all the ways his fuck ups hurt the ones he loves.

Cas wants to help the brothers, so he leaves. He’s caused them so much pain what right does he have to be around them, when he can be out there getting them information, finding things they need, helping fix their problems. This is his penance. Because no matter how hard he rebelled or how far he fell Castiel has an innate, almost primal need to be holy, to be absolved of his mistakes and sins. And he’s made so many mistakes where else can he find penance but in misery?

And in almost every episode Dean is in some way or form asking Castiel if he'll stay this time, and every-time Cas says no. And Dean can be mean, he’s s a deeply angry man, and so every no seems like proof that he’s pushed him to far that this is it this is when Cas says he's had enough. He's not gonna stay and be screamed or laughed at anymore. Dean’s finally succeeded in driving him away as he does anyone that’s ever given a damn about him. That this is proof of how toxic he is; after all Castiel is a creature with wings, all he wants to do is fly, and here Dean is trying to keep him in a cage.

The more Cas leaves on his own, the more Dean feels the need to give him a reason too.

The ways in which we punish ourselves; depriving ourselves of the ways in which we love.

The narrative’s doomed them from the start.

[endverse-cas-my-beloved]

I personally don't think that whenever there's the "they get with a curse and suddenly they're in the body of another gender" should really ever change the person's attraction, because I think that implies that sexuality is connected to your biology, and that's a load of crap.

That being said, I think that if you put Dean Winchester in the body of a female Dean would absolutely believe this means he's allowed to be attracted to guys now. Like in his mind, he's still straight, because he's female now, and that means he's supposed to be attracted to guys.

Anyways I just think it would be incredibly funny if he were to turn into a girl and suddenly be on Cas and you could not pull him away. Like he wants that dick so bad (he's always wanted his dick) and he's gotta have it before he turns back because when he turns back he won't want it anymore (he's literally just in denial).

Like Cas is over here rushing to fix Dean back the way he should be because he's so worried Dean is gonna go through one of his impending freak-outs because Cas is aware of how strongly Dean feels about his gender and Dean is just nodding along in the way he usually does when he's absolutely not listening to Cas going, "uh huh, yep, so what I'm hearing is your dick, my mouth now".

He genuinely doesn't freak out about being in this body until Cas eventually (he was stopped at least 7 times by Dean's need to have Cas's dick somewhere in him) finds the cure, and then freaks out because he doesn't want to lose Cas and he's genuinely convinced his sexuality is gonna change back with his body.

Cue Cas actually finally realizing what's going on in Dean's head (he was just so happy Dean finally kissed him and he already doesn't understand anything that goes through that man's head so he just assumed he finally did something right) and he just stops Dean's overthinking and catapults him through the seven stages of bi denial with, "Dean if you switch back I promise you I will have your dick down my throat in five minutes".

Dean has that flash through his eyes and can see Cas on his knees already so clearly that he just goes stupid and is all, "yeah, yep, absolutely let's do that."

They're dating from that point on.

It isn't until 3 months in that Dean actually figured out he's bi though, and he only does because Sam remarks on how much happier he is with Cas now and Dean's all, "Yep, I can't even be upset that curse changed my sexuality. If I'd never been hit by it I wouldn't have ever been able to get with Cas." and Sam goes through the seven stages of "my brother is an idiot" and informs Dean that your sexuality isn't tied to your body.

Dean laughs Sam off because he clearly doesn't know how these things work and it's only after he tells his story to Cas later that day laughing as he's getting changed for bed and Cas doesn't laugh and instead tells Dean that Sam is right that Dean accepts it, but instead of having a normal reaction it's just, "You mean I was allowed to suck your dick this entire time?!"

Cas stares at him going through the seven stages of grief because of his boyfriend keeping them from being together because of stupid, heteronormative thinking finally just sighs, grabs Dean behind the neck as he's just about to put his shirt on, pulls him forward and in the most tired voice he has, that somehow is still totally working for Dean, just goes, "Get on your knees right now."

And Dean shuts up in more than one way immediately.

[whoblewboobear]

Soooo Cas canonically has a car and in my mind it’s a pickup truck bc I think it suits them. Sometimes Gabe and Mc fight over who gets the passenger seat and who gets to ride in the back. I think they probably bully Cas into taking them on late night diner trips in neighboring towns and Gabe would 100% offer to drive if Cas isn’t feeling up to it. They refuse every time even though they secretly appreciate the sentiment. Mc definitely notices the little smile Cas tries to hide after Gabe asks and makes a mental note to tease them about it later.

[arabella-s-arts]

I have listened to more country music in the last four days then I have in my entire life. And it's all Jensen Ackles' fault.

[moonfromearth]

What do you do when you're procrastinating writing your book? Make the characters in Sims, of course. 😉

[casdeans-pie]

Still working on a Trueform!Cas post-canon fic.... here's a teeny tiny snippet.....

Dean hadn’t really seen much of Cas, other than the extremely awkward ‘reunion’ that they’d had when they’d first seen each other again in Heaven – Cas finally free of the Empty, and Dean, well, dead. Cas had looked at him with an expression that seemed to flick back and forth between something like wonderment and fury, and Dean, his skin itching with the urge to do something (Do what? Do what?) had shrugged and said, ‘Just how I said I’d always go’. And between one blink and the next Cas had disappeared with the sound of beating wings.

[byanyan]

me remembering that i used to write the two supernatural muses is like uncovering trauma i forgot about i stg

[kerryweaverlesbian]

The Winchester brothers? Oh I think you mean Sam Leahy and Dean Singer <3 I think their mom is Mary Campbell-Winchester so maybe that's where you got confused <3

[super-flan]

Yesterday I began season 14 on my 1st SPN rewatch. 14x01 pissed me off. 🤬

It’s the obvious inconsistencies & lazy ass writing what gets my blood boiling.

In the SAME EPISODE we have Sister Jo looking at Dean’s face & seeing apocalypse!Michael, & Cas didn’t know he was surrounded by demons!?!? REALLY?!?!

Then Cas heals ppl & even enters Dean’s mind in 14x02 & 14x03, but he couldn’t heal HIMSELF when the demons attacked him.

& Kip saying Cas’s function or purpose was to be a hostage/bait to get trap Sam/The Winchesters? WTF!!! Even w/o wings, he’s still an angel.

O te peinas o te haces rolos. Angels are either powerful or they’re not. Making them as weak or as strong depending on what you want in a particular scene w/o any consistency is LAZY-ASS WRITING. Those writers got paid. They should be able to do better than people who write for free (cuz they should at least have more time). How is it that the average fic is better & more consistent than this!!!