What He Wishes For
It's SO late, but I wrote a little something for @glassesblu for Christmas. It's a character piece for his Cringo AU.
Title: What He Wishes For
Word count: 949
Sometimes, even the words of Emmet were not enough to calm the fear in his heart. Most times, his brother’s voice and presence would allow him to feel a temporary comfort, wrapped around him as if a blanket. Emmet was kind, playful, and worked tirelessly to keep his mind occupied on anything but self-loathing. When Emmet smiled at him, he felt light, as if he was floating. Emmet had always made him feel some kind of way, and it was only recently that he realized it was a positive thing.
Ingo wished, more than anything, that he could forget what he was, leave it behind as he grew older. If he could have been human from the start, he and Emmet could have lived side by side for their entire lives. They could get normal jobs, live in a regular house; Emmet was so smart and enthusiastic that he could do anything he set his mind to. Coming home from work to see Emmet welcoming him would be a dream come true.
However, every day, he was reminded just how different they were, how incompatible their existence together was.
A copper tang of thrumming blood tickled his senses, flaring his nostrils in his already restless sleep. An ear flicked, and he tried hopelessly to will himself back to dreaming. But a body, sighing sleepily, shifted closer towards him, soft skin pressing against his fur and bringing an all too welcome warmth.
Conflicting feelings warred within him.
He yearned to pull the body closer to him, hold it tightly in his arms, feel it draw into him and merge with his essence. To have it be one with him, the final ultimate completeness, would soothe whatever it was that threw itself at his rib cage day in and day out desperate to burst out. A deep inhale of the scent of the body brought him to salivating.
Repulsed, he blearily cracked open his eyes and drew his tongue around his snout. Salivating was ridiculous; it was not as though he would swallow Emmet through his mouth. At least, he didn’t think that’s how it went. Consume by absorbing. That was the impulse, the drive that gnawed at him, and it was all he could think of some days.
Still half asleep but unable to truly drift off, his mind wandered without much of his own input. His thoughts were foggy, instinct-driven, and he hugged Emmet closer to himself to act as a tether in case his own thoughts became too much. Tilting his snout down to ruffle it through Emmet’s hair, he drew in a long inhale in hopes of calming his nerves and centering his thoughts.
What would he be like if he consumed Emmet? The thought sprung unbidden to his mind as he tried to concentrate on Emmet’s presence. Would he become Emmet, since he knew him so well, or would he be a corrupted version, just like that changeling that ate Elesa? Would he become kind, then? Would he be able to look at even the worst being and see good in them? Would he become so certain of himself, able to watch the world with a smile? Would he finally become good?
A ragged gasp of breath pulled his focus out from the pinpoint it had become. Emmet, still asleep, let out a labored whine as though he were having a nightmare, brow dotted with sweat.
With a gasp, he loosened his grip on his brother. The static charge of power dissipated between them, and in an instant Emmet relaxed again. Muttering a light groan, Emmet burrowed back into his arms, seeming to not notice the tremor in Ingo’s grip.
Consume whispered in the back of his mind, and he could feel the same static fizz at his fur.
“No!” he desperately whispered, ears back and tears beginning to prick hotly at the corner of his eyes. He couldn’t bear to not have Emmet by his side, even if his entire being wanted to pull Emmet within him. Within him, Emmet would no longer be able to smile at him, press kisses to his face, tell him he loved him…
There was no way that absorbing Emmet could be better than any of those things.
Squeezing his eyes tight, he attempted to stop the shaking that threatened to rattle his very bones. Consume rumbled louder in his mind, but he thrashed his head back and forth. A mantra of ‘no no no no no’ started in his head, and white blossomed behind his eyelids.
“Ingo?”
Eyes snapping open, he looked down to see Emmet blinking sleepily up at him. “E-Emmet?” he croaked out, throat drier than he expected.
“Did you have a nightmare? Don’t worry. Emmet is here.” Reaching up towards him, Emmet’s hand was cool and soft, turning the shaking to shivering. He was covered in fur, he should not have been cold and yet…
“Yes... You are here,” he said, voice cracking with tears. “Thank you for being here, Emmet.” His brother must have realized how much he wanted to hold him, even through his hesitation, because he shimmied upwards in the nest they had made. In his new position, he held Ingo’s snout against his chest, pressing kisses to Ingo’s forehead in a mirror of how Ingo had previously held him.
“I am Emmet. I won’t leave Ingo’s side. Ever.” His brother’s words are firm, allowing for no argument, and he let his eyes shut once more. A shuddering breath was the only sound he made as the tears finally spilled over, wetting his fur and Emmet’s chest.
More than anything, he wished he could forget what he was, and simply be Emmet’s brother.
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POST DEVIL ENDING
saburo overall keeps yorinobu's look, changes his glasses OBVIOUSLY. figures he'll keep the updated 'modern' wardrobe and mix his preferred traditional clothes in with.
has a real adjustment period of "damn son, you live like this?" *hasnt been able to run or jog for nearly 100 years* big cringo moment having to see his own son's dick n balls. extra cringe when he's overcome with the classic human baser instinct of "i NEED to fuck" and gets flashes of yori's memories w evelyn. in fact, he gets LOTS of flashes of yori's memories, and it makes him a LIL BIT crazy. gets him a LITTLE off track.
between hanako urging him to get it together and yori haunting him, it's what makes him reach the peace agreement with rosalind myers despite her initial shittalking the whole "immortality" thing (classic politician flipflopping amirite)
his new personal project is now human cloning. He's gonna make some clones to keep this shitwagon rollin. And ALSO, yes, he had a relic made of yorinobu and kinda wants his boy back. granted, he's still salty over having the life choked outta him (does NOT like breathplay in sex LOL)
his relationship with hanako has irrevocably changed to be a little more awkward. she doesn't care to see her brother's face now acting as her dad.
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