#COD headcanons

[ghouljams]

what sort of body hair & body types do you think the 141 boys have

So glad you asked:

Starting with pretty boy Gaz, He's absolutely got the gym body. You know the one with the perfectly sculpted muscles, tugging his shorts up to show off the flex of his thighs for the camera as he grins, rolling his shoulders back to show off the lats, flexing for the camera. He's more lean muscle than huge body builder vibes, like it's definitely tailored to his body type, but it's that instagram influencer perfect physique. He's got a well groomed smattering of hair. Not a ton on his chest but plenty of people are eyeing that neat happy trail as he does chest presses at the gym. Lemme get a peak at that man in the sauna...

Soap is a big lad, but it's all muscle. He definitely is going for more of the body builder physique. Packs on muscle really well, and tries to manage his macros so that he keeps his abs when he wants them. The man is stacked. He's also hairy. He's the motherfucker that you're hoping to death wipes off the gym equipment because you can see him sweating through that pelt he's got. Good dark hair on his arms and legs, and chest hair you just wanna bury your face in. You're not even into that stuff but when he raises his arms to grab the lat tower bar you kinda wanna run your tongue through his underarm hair. You just know that man doesn't even trim his pubic area...

Ghost is just naturally big, but he also packs on muscle like a motherfucker. Ghost has a solid strongman look, like he definitely works out, and you've seen him bench 400 lbs without breaking a sweat, but he also looks like he never turns down a slice of cake. Olympic dead lifter type. You could watch him run on the treadmill for hours with the way his pecs bounce. Doesn't look hairy because he's blond, so it's very light wispy hair, but he's got a nice map of curls at the base of his dick that just make you wanna suck him off. Always lets his towel sit too low in the sauna, when you die, you wanna come back as the sweat dripping between his tits.

Price... You wanna talk about a man that pass up a decent meal it's Price. That doesn't mean he isn't in the gym with his men, it just means he's the one in the mess at midnight grabbing that last cookie before bed. He's good at shedding the weight though. You see him before a mission and he's trimmed up, but once he's home he's a bear of a man. That goes for the hair too. That man is so fucking hairy. Thick dark hair all over his body, to the point where you're not sure he isn't a werewolf or something. You actually checked the lunar cycle once when he wiped his face with the bottom of his shirt in the gym, and you saw the thick hair trailing down the center line of his stomach. (What a man, what a man, what a man)

[vaquerolvr]

“i’m pregnant” (not)

synopsis: pranking the cod guys by saying you’re pregnant // requested by anon <3

ੈ✩‧₊˚ price, gaz, ghost, soap, alejandro, rudy, graves, makarov

cw: pregnancy (duh), implications of sex but nothing explicit, makarov being a freak

an: tried my best to keep reader gn but not sure if i succeeded?

dividers from @/saradika-graphics :)

[mactavishsgfandwife]

thinking about curly-haired simon riley who keeps his hair buzzed cause it’s ‘mad’ and he has no clue how to style it

maybe one day he comes home from a long mission where he didn’t get to cut his hair, or maybe while you were staying together over covid he got lazy and decided to let it grow, and now you’re blessed with the sight of your grumpy military husband with a head of hair like an unsheared sheep

(this is fully inspired by my dreadful hair day today)

[codnasties]

5k special ♡ thanks for 5k of x and 2,5k on tumblr

facetime with ghost 👻 (🌽 link)

please check the link to see the video ;)

ghost is the type to facetime you out of nowhere. when you answer you are greeted by his aching cock's perfect imprint on his pants. with that and him telling you to go get your pretty dildo, you aready know what's coming. that's how you end up coming together, you riding the fake dick and him pumping his, giving you a goor view of his balls moving with each stroke and making a mess of his big cock, cum dripping down his shaft and even reaching his strong thighs.

[gremlinmodetweeker]

Cat hybrid!König is an absolute fatass about food. As of now, Reader's nickname for him is 'Fatass' like Cartman from South Park. He's a genuine nightmare to deal with. He just won't stop eating, and it takes child locks to get him to stop tucking in (and then he just shifts when Reaer is asleep to eat more). He's absolutely awful. Reader is regularly eaten out of house and home.

[gremlinmodetweeker]

König at 6:30 am on November 1st.

König would not survive No Nut November... 🤐

[stoutguts]

shameless NikPrice smut (originally posted this as a thread on my NSFW Twitter)—MINORS DO NOT INTERACT‼️🔞

NikPrice and Price is the bottom.

Nikolai being the luckiest man on earth.

Like just imagine, no nonsense and all too stoic Price reduced to a drooling and babbling mess, tears streaming from the corners of his eyes.

Totally fucked out, eyes with pupils blow wide are rolling back into his head on every thrust. Moaning like a bitch in heat, considerably higher pitch and whiny than his usual husky baritone. A brilliant blush setting his face on fire, the tips of his ears, nose, and pecs the cutest shade of pink—Creeping down to his neck, shoulders, and chest in splotches.

His gorilla-like body hair, happy trail,—pubes and all, are soaking wet with either sweat, slick, spit, or cum. Or maybe a combination of all of them. His hands are simultaneously clawing at Nik’s scalp and back, while his legs are wrapped around his waist like a vice. Actively encouraging Nikolai to grind into him.

“You’re perfect, John”, Nik praises, and Price lets out a loud involuntary whimper in response.

He is mercilessly pounding into him.

Nikolai kisses and nibbles at Price’s neck, before he’s locked into a desperate and needy kiss. Tongues flailing, teeth scraping against lips, and spit dribbling out.

“May be captain, head honcho of your little task force—Most efficient man out on field, yet in bedroom a different story”, Nik chuckles. “Useless here, in my arms. Make me do all work,—a bitch to be bred. No?”

“F-Fuh-ckin’ tw-twat…”, Price barely manages to breathe out.

Nikolai briefly readjusts and angles himself up, before slamming into Price’s prostate. Quickly bringing up one of his hands that had been bracing himself against the mattress, for a death grip on the base of Price’s hard and swollen cock.

“N—na-hah-n-Nikkkkk…!”, Price muffledly cries out as if he’s being strangled.

“What was that?”, he sneers.

“P-ple-ah-esee..!”, Price whimpers uncontrollably. Like he’s fucking dying.

“Let you cum? You want, sweetheart? Admit you’re my bitch, ask me to fill you up”, Nikolai replies, before speeding up.

“Ah-hah—nh-n-Nik, puh-please, b-breed yuh-your b-bi-bitch..! F-fill m-me up-p, pleaseee!”, Price chokes out, eyes completely unfocused and hazy with pure pleasure.

Nik promptly releases his harsh grip on Price’s cock, before pistoning his hips even harder and faster.

Price cumming untouched for the 3rd or 4th time that evening, soundless as he went. Nikolai following seconds after and fucking him through both their orgasms. Filling him up alright, cum oozing out of his hole as he finally pulls out. Nik settles atop his lover, both breathless.

“You’re gonna bloody kill me, at this rate”, Price bitterly says, only slightly annoyed.

“Nothing you can’t handle, Captain. Know you love it”, Nikolai shoots back, settling him down with another kiss.

Pathetic/needy bottom Price, my beloved.

[empresskylo]

ghost knows he’s too rough and impatient with sex. knows he won’t know how to please you properly. knows he can’t possibly do things right with you, knowing you’ve never done this before. but god, he wants to. he wants to treat you how you deserve. never thought he’d be so desperate to fuck someone good and slow like he does with you.

so he goes to price. the one man who will know all the right ways to please a lady properly. asks him to show him how to take care of you. tells him he doesn't know how to care for someone else's needs, at least with someone inexperienced like you. tells him he needs to be instructed. to see just how he should work you.

you’re nervous at first, thinking it’s an absolutely insane idea, but you can’t hide the wetness along your panties as you sit on ghost’s lap, back pressed against his chest, legs spread, his knuckle dragging down your warmth. price sits back in his chair, telling ghost exactly how to move his fingers, paying close attention to your body's minuscule movements, the way your brows furrow when ghost moves a certain way, or your eyelashes fluttering.

and this was supposed to be a strictly hands-off approach… but god, watching ghost fumble, unable to maintain the slow speed you need, keeping you from reaching your orgasm, has price on edge. he leans forward, rolling his chair with him, and tells ghost to stop. tells him to watch and to pay close attention. price tears your panties off and your eyes go wide at the contact. you swallow, expecting ghost to be furious, but his hands only settle around you and he takes notes as he watches his captain work.

price runs his thumb up your slit, circling your nub, and tells ghost to hold your thighs apart when you unconsciously try to clench them. then his finger is sinking into you and your head falls back against ghost's chest, eyes shut. you moan and you feel ghost harden beneath you. “how’s that feel, sweetheart?” price asks you. you babble out incoherently, price adding a second finger, and chuckling darkly at your response.

it becomes too much, his fingers thrusting in and out of you, his other hand rubbing your clit, ghost's fingers digging into the softness of your thighs as he forces them apart. “ohmygod,” you slur, “m’gonna—“ price smirks, his eyes darkening as he watches you orgasm, your body clenching around his fingers shoved deep in your heat. "talk her through it," price tells ghost. so ghost does. you're shaking still and ghost rubs his hands over your exposed skin. "that's it, baby. you're doin' s'good," he praises.

"whata fuckin' sight," price mumbles to himself, his fingers leaving you empty. you steady your breathing, coming down from your high, completely limp in ghost's arms. price can see the way ghost's eyes have gone dark, his pupils swallowing his irises whole. knows ghost doesn't know how to be soft. sees the feral need to ram himself into you overtaking his features. "gonna take it slow with her, yeah?" price asks.

ghost breathes rapidly out, his hips begging to buck up against you. he knows he wouldn't be able to control himself if you let him fuck you. so he answers honestly. "not sure I'd be able to."

price tsks, sitting back in thought, his eyes roving over your spent body. you suddenly feel shy, wanting to close your legs, but ghost's arms tighten on you. "need me t'break her in?" price finally asks after several long beats of silence.

ghost grinds up against you, his hand sliding into your hair and pulling your head to the side so he can kiss your neck. your eyes flutter at his attempts to be so delicate with you. "want the captain here to be your first time, love?" ghost asks against your skin. you stutter when you answer. "don't you want to be?" "course I do. but I won't go easy on ya. I'd hate to ruin you, sweet girl. price will take it nice n' slow. just like you need." and after, you'll be ready to take ghost. ready to adjust to his size.

you swallow hard, ghost's hands escaping and clawing at your clothed chest. you nod. "o-okay."

price stands from his chair and begins to undo his belt. "come sit on my desk, sweetheart."

cod masterlist

[writersdrug]

Johnny "Soap" Mactavish is the kind of dad who throws your kids around for fun, tossing them into the air and catching them just to hear their infectious laughter, ignoring the worrisome protests that you call out from the kitchen when they get a little too high.

Captain John Price is the kind of dad who convinces your children to ask you for pizza for dinner, acting all surprised when you tell him to call the local pizza place, eyebrows rising with "What's the occasion?" despite the obvious grin that his plan worked. You aren't fooled.

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick is the kind of dad who chases your kids around with a nerf gun, relentlessly pelting them with styrofoam bullets and ganging up on your oldest son with your youngest daughter. Waits behind the front door for your son to get home from school and immediately fires on him.

Simon "Ghost" Riley is the kind of dad who holds your toddlers like footballs, your daughter tucked sideways under his arm and dangling your son by his ankle. "Found these mice sniffin' 'round the cookie tin." He says with a deadpan expression, but you don't miss the way his mouth twitches when they giggle and shriek.

[stargirlstabber]

imagine könig, the big man he is, slamming his massive dick in and out of you, not caring if it 'doesn't fit'. he will make it fit. he will. he'll manhandle you into various positions, the ones he wants to fuck you in that moment. you'll probably start crying by the time he chases his second release or when he decides to fill both of your tight holes and pushes a dildo or a plug into you. or maybe a vibrator. it really depends on his mood and how good you've been for him. squirming away won't help if he's balls deep into your sloppy cunt, the grip his massive hands have on you holds you like you're a doll to him. which you are.

[vaquerolvr]

“they’re busy rn”

synopsis: pranking the cod guys by texting them “they’re busy rn” // requested by anon <3

ੈ✩‧₊˚ price, gaz, ghost, soap, alejandro, rudy, graves, makarov

cw: death threats, threats of violence, implied stalking maybe? (makarov)

translation for alejandro’s at the bottom

No tienes idea con quién te acabas de meter cabrón - You have no idea who you just messed with motherfucker

an: i’ve been looping the new tyler album for the last week ITS SO GOOOOD. for anyone else who believes in the 'adler is graves dad' theory, i literally can't stop imagining an edit of them to 'like him'

[mactavishsgfandwife]

just saw a headcanon for simon’s favourite colours, very cute however imagine asking that man for his favourite colour??? he would not take you seriously

"Siiiiiiii..?"

He turns his rough face to you, not feeling the need to respond with his words. He always does that - damned if you know why - claims there’s no point responding verbally when you can literally see that he’s listening. At heart, the big guy’s just a contrarian. Still, you want to hear him speak.

"Simon?" You nudge him with your feet, the both of you lounging on the sofa. Him in that old tshirt that definitely has like 5 holes in it, and his plaid pyjama bottoms, and you in one of the few shirts of his that was actually purchased in the last decade. He’s not really used to staying at home, what with his job, but when he does finally the opportunity to spend the day with you he will make every excuse in the book just to stay at home all day, basking in your presence.

"Wha?"

What a romantic, really.

"Wha’s your favourite colour?" you nudge him again with your feet, just for the sake of annoying him.

"Sorry, what?" he laughs a little, propping himself up to sit a little straighter in the company of his missus.

"I said, what’s your favourite colour?"

"What sort of a question is tha’?" he grins, crossing those arms. Christ, those arms… but that’s besides the point.

"What do you mean?" you frown, nudging him again.

"Stop," he chides, catching your pretty little foot in his rough hand, like his prey. He gives it a little tickle just to mess with you, then holds it firmly as if it were a little treasure, and not a foot.

"Don’t have one, love," he grins, a little amused, "’M a grown man."

"Everyone has one," you protest.

"You tell y’rself that."

"Shut up. You do have one, Si, you have to."

"No," his thin lip curls a little, betraying his amusement.

"What is it?"

"Don’t have one."

"You do."

Si pauses, looking at you blankly for a few seconds until his empty stare turns to a stupid, sly grin.

"… Shutup."

"What is it, what is it, what is it, what is it????" you delight in this grand new revelation.

"Not telling."

You glare at him with those playful eyes. Only a saint could resist the temptation to give you whatever you wanted, and Simon is no saint.

"… Black," Si huffs.

There’s a slight pause as it’s now your turn to stare at him blankly. There’s a brief silence.

"You know that’s not a colour, right?" you cackle, letting him wind an arm around your waist and pull you closer to him.

"Is," he grumbles, burying his face in the sweet scent of your hair.

it’s 3am and i need to be up early tomorrow 😿😿😿

hope you guys likey, i haven’t written anything since like march!!!

masterlist - lots more simon among other things

[codnasties]

5k special ♡ thanks for 5k of x and 2,5k on tumblr

facetime with price 🚬 (🌽 link)

sending him a pic of your bare wet cunt to tease him and not even five minutes later the man's facetiming you, angry red cock already in his hand and lazily stroking it. to his surprise, he's greeted by a similar situation on your side: sitting on a chair, fucking yourself dumb on some dildo. then the fun for the two of you starts but it doesn't end until you've cumed multiple times, slit and chair covered in your juices, and he's made a mess out of his own thighs, coated with his seed. the mirror he was sitting in front of also stained.the veins on his arms popping from all the stroking.

[gremlinmodetweeker]

Mine friendo, the cat men and actual fish and stuff, salmon or tuna compared to canned cat food? Does König's fat ass eat the bag of tuna or demand the highest of quality of kitter food?

Okay so, König will eat anything and everything. For a good while, life was good for Reader. They could get whatever cheap crap they wanted and König would eat it all.

However, Horangi wouldn't.

Horangi started to get a bit thin. He turned his nose up at the stuff, looked away when Reader tried to feed him. He got huffy and puffy and upset. So what did reader do? She had to upgrade the food quality.

Now, if you get top of the line cat food, Horangi might eat it, but it's best to give him cooked meats and fish. He's incredibly fussy.

Now, one cat being fussy is one thing. Unfortunately, König quickly caught on and now he's fussy too! So now you have two fussy cats who both want prime quality fish and meat every night.

The problem, of course, is Horangi basically went on a silent hunger strike. König is too much of a fatass to be silent. He yowled and wailed and cried for ages until Reader gave in and gave him a bite of meat. Then he demanded more. And more. AND MORE.

Now, the grocery bill has basically tripled. However, notably, you got raises at your job. You boss looked very stressed when they told you. You keep finding extra change around the house. You notice that lately, you've been quite fortunate in circumstances. Friends are more willing to pay you back, all those debts are suddenly cleared (which causes a whole panic but that gets sorted when you hear it was a billionaire paying student loans). You somehow seem to find yourself getting more money.

And what do you do with this money? You treat your babies, of course!

Horangi and König are scrambling to find ways to get you more money. At this point, they're struggling to stay undercover because both of them want to sweep you off your feet and splurge on you. Until they figure out how they can both date you, they'll stick to making sure you find a hundred dollar bill crumpled beside your welcome mat.

[blond3ang3l]

I don’t agree with cheating at all..

But like imagine neighbor! Price, he knows your husband and isn’t that big of a fan of him at all. Leaving you alone for days on end for “business trips”. Price knew that’s not what he was doing. Your husband was a damn junkie. Running up all you guys money on coke and bottles at clubs.

He had seen him while off duty at a club with Gaz and Nikolai. Blowing your money, the money he had spent without your knowledge, on strippers and the several bottles he had bought in the club.

Price being be good neighbor he was had told you. He felt bad when he saw how your heart practically shattered. You were tearing up and ended up crying into his chest. He brought you back into your house where he stayed with you the entire time. Your tears for your husband was soon replaced with tears for John as he had you splayed out on his lap.

“I know baby, I know. Feels good yeah?”

You could barely get your words out as he rubbed your clit for what seemed like forever while he had you propped up on his lap. Tears pouring down your cheeks as you felt your fourth orgasm hit you.

“So good for me doll, let’s make sure you feel real nice now, yeah?..”💭🎀

[guppybibi]

John Price who absolutely loves it when you nag him. Would kill someone just to hear you scold him about smoking another cigar today. Who wouldn't appreciate all the nagging you do for him? He doesn't understand all of the other husbands who despise their wive's nagging, you wouldn't have nagged in the first place if you didn't care for their wellbeing in the first place!

Like he accidentally left the faucet slightly open? He could already hear your sweet voice lecturing him on and on about water conservation and such. You not only care for him, but the environment too? He scored a goal he never even knew he was missing the whole time!

Or maybe he casually skipped a meal to clear off his workload? Oh boy, he could practically see the outline of your shadow, approaching his office with a hearty meal and a frustrated pout. His imagination was doing wonders while he thought about what you plan on saying upon entering the room, perhaps you'll just step in and shove a spoonful of whatever food you have into his mouth?

He could die happy if he hears you telling him off about putting the toilet paper under instead of over (which is apparently the right way, from what I've heard) or for not taking out the trash earlier in time. John Price is a simple man, who appreciates the simple things in life, by your words alone he can already tell how much you care and value him as a person and as your husband.