#CJ DON'T DOUBT YOURSELF

[joffyworld]

CJ THIS IS AMAZING DON'T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF

AN ARTIST'S BIGGEST CRITIC IS THEMSELVES DON'T FORGET THAT

Is this my best comic ever?? Nope. Do I think I characterized either of these two particularly well in this comic?? Not really. Did I spend an unreasonable amount of time on it to the point that it would be a waste to not post it?? Yes, yes I did.

I really committed to this one, spent a lot of time on those backgrounds and treated myself to ample suffering with the perspective, which is not my strong suit but I am happy with how it ultimately looks. Yay perspective and background practice!!

(Tbh I shouldn't talk like I think this one sucks, I think I've just been staring at it for so long that my brain has decided it's not good and it's actually way better than I think it is, and honestly I am quite happy with it. The artistic process really is something, isn't it?)

The inspiration was basically me reminding... myself... to take breaks sometimes... by drawing for several hour stints during my only little bits of free time. Which totally tracks. Probably. But I've been rolling around in my brain this idea that Lambert is a very uptight people pleaser and anxious workaholic, but Narinder, at least since adjusting himself to the circumstances (which probably took at least a century, maybe two) has discovered the joys of self care, and has made an active effort to chill tf out. This has not made him any less terrifying to the cultists (save for Lambert's closest disciples), nor has it made him friendlier to really anyone but Lambert (and maybe his siblings), but he sure has found some serious peace of mind. That said, I can't place what his motivations are here. Perhaps he is secretly concerned about Lambert's sanity, because he doesn't want them to turn into what he was, or maybe he's just trying to steal away some quality time with his one and only friend, but regardless of the reason, I spent too much time on this for nobody to see it, dang it.

That said. Enjoy this silly little comic that I spent way too much time on, and I hope this silly comic brings you some joy today.

[blueteller]

I was reading through your posts earlier and saw the one about LSH CJS & KRS' abilities, and it made me want to share my personal headcanon for another Ability of KRS. As a disclaimer, I think this is very unlikely to be canon, but I found it such an interesting idea that I have pretty much integrated it into my headcanons and just wanted to share since you were also guessing about potential other abilities for him. Basically, I think an interesting third ability for KRS would be: being in the right place at the right time. I know it sounds pretty lackluster, but hear me out. Over the course of canon, there have been a LOT of lucky coincidences for Cale. He is constantly stumbling into people who desperately need his help at exactly the right moment to provide it (and earn their undying loyalty.) Hannah and Jack are just one of many examples of this. It's like his random encounter chance is at 100% at all times. Now, I do understand this is run of the mill for fiction, and in order to have a good and interesting story you need to maintain a certain suspension of disbelief for the lucky/unlucky coincidences the protagonist runs into, and I have no issues with that, which is why I say I doubt this is a canon ability. BUT, I do think it would be both interesting and reasonable within the setting for KRS to have that sort of ability. To explain my imagined details, it is basically an intuition of "if you go to this place at this time, then something you want/need to do will be there". No hints or anything about what will happen, just "go here and figure the rest out on your own." For the guy who can never leave anyone to suffer, even as he insists he wants to be a slacker, I think it would be something he couldn't ignore. Basically, it is a useless and even confusing ability for anyone but Cale, who has maxed out observation and strategy skills allowing him to notice the Random Encounters in his vicinity. It would also explain all the times he just so happens to run into exactly the person he needs to solve either a current or future problem. Honestly, what inspired me to think about this was the idea that a lot of Cale's dear friends and family members would straight up be dead if he hadn't coincidentally been there to give them the opportunity to save themselves, and it made me really sad so I came up with an Ability to fix it. I basically overthought things so much the power of Cale's protagonist halo leading him to story-relevant events was unable to soothe me, lol.

That's truly, really interesting! I don't think you overthought this at all – because it matches quite well with a certain theory of mine! …Well, not 100%, but hear me out.

Personally, I don't believe that Cale has a "luck" ability.

It's still a solid theory, of course – because if he had such an ability, there's a high possibility that he wouldn't realize it (having lived an extremely difficult life, on the top of being emotionally dense). In his previous life as Kim Rok Soo, he was under the Curse of the God of Death, which caused him constant misfortune and suffering. However, a "luck" ability would alleviate the symptoms a bit. Meaning: despite the odds, KRS still survived. He still made friends. He still experienced joy. Perhaps it was just because the Curse was weakened for KRS in comparison to the White Star, but perhaps he also had a natural affinity for good fortune, which helped him out.

I don't believe that's the case, though. Because you forget another important factor in TCF which hadn't been explained in detail yet: and that is Karma.

Now, according too google, Karma (in Hinduism and Buddhism) is "the sum of a person's actions in this and previous states of existence, viewed as deciding their fate in future existences." In TCF, it seems Karma is some form of energy, which can be obtained in three ways:

being naturally born with it

saving a lot of people by sacrificing yourself

stealing from other people by killing them

While we know that Karma can be used for transportation between universes ("I dedicate my Karma", a method used by the Hunters), and also having a lot of it means ascention into a divine being like a God or a Wanderer… I believe that Karma is also tied to fate, in a way. Good fate, to be specific.

Someone like KRS, who bore the Curse by no fault of his own, his Karma would remain unaffected. He would have earned a lot of it by saving people through-out his life and sacrificing himself constantly. Remember the incident where Choi Jung Soo and Lee Soo Hyuk died? KRS decided to stay and sacrifice himself, too. Just because he didn't die doesn't mean his sacrifice didn't count.

My point is: I think KRS got a lot of Karma. Which means there was a lot of good fortune in store for him. However, due to the Curse blocking all of it (or most of it, who knows), it was bottled up and unavailable… until the moment he transmigrated as Cale.

As Cale, he suddenly had a huge untapped reserves of good fortune on his side. And I think that was the reason why he was so lucky. He was guided to all the allies he would need by this force of Karma, which is directly tied to Fate. He was even able to alter the fate of the Black Dragon's – Raon's – death. The narrative stated that it was such an important event, that even Nature took notice of it and had to "accept" Raon as living in the world. Cale's earned Karma was so powerful he was able to implement such a huge change.

To sum it up, I don't think Cale is lucky because he's a protagonist written that way, or because it's an ability of his. I really think it's because of Karma, and that we will find out more about it in the future.

Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts with me! I hope my reply did not disappoint 😊

[cogbreath]

learning about atticus wing was. wow. i hate it here dawg. but also whats anyone to do? damn. sure the toons killed him. not happy to hear that at all. but damn. cogs inc isnt good. like its responsible for what happened to atticus, really. and its not like they really care either. i think i do hate the chairman. but i only know a bit about him. i dont know his backstory. but what i do know is really not good. anyway. i think that the corporation as a whole needs to be destroyed for the sake of not just the toons but the cogs. they are people too who are effected by all this emotionslly financially physically etc.

i mean really can you fully truly blame the lot of them for having a job. yes a lot of them revere the company. and yes canonically there are other jobs. but i wonder how good the job market even is?? perhaps its a lot like real life. i don't have a lot of experience with it. but ive heard what people say. so i presume thst cogs inc is competative enough to offer just enough benefits or better pay to make people want to leave their previous jobs for it. and probably everycog has their different motivations and hopes for it. some hope to just get by and make a living. others hope to climb the corporate ladder. but in the end it doesn't matter. its never enough. and the chairman is happy to get rid of you at a moments notice. he was gonna fire CJ. he doesn't really care how long youve worked how loyal youve been. CJ was an OG, and he was ready to fire him. Even if CJ turned the tables played the long game, etc... ultimately his circumstances are probably unique. i doubt even a manager would make it that long, would be able to happily retire like he did.

its a meat grinder in there. youre set up from day one to have your life, your very body used up until its unusable for even yourself for the sake of the company. its your fault btw per the employee injury report thing. always. like you can't even try to put blame on the company if they deserve it. yes the pollution and environmental damage its doing to toontown is bad, but damn i think we need to care more about than just toon welfare. and additionally the places previously effected by the pollution.

its tough because cogs do live off of oil and such. its literally food & water for them. so this means that some oil drilling needs to be done unless theres a possibility of reengineering them to run off more environmentally sustainable things?? you cant just stop entirely. youd be starving an entire society. and its not reallt fine just because theyre robots. theyre robots with families and lives and wishes and they have fun too. they can cry they experience emotions and heartbreak and love. theres a whole world and culture that we as toons are only faintly aware of but it would be wrong to destroy it all because of a monopoly in their society. its effecting them too. i want cogs to live i want them to be happy with their families and eat food and fall in love and find success and happiness outside of cogsinc. i rlly support and wish for cog liberation not cog destruction. okay thats all thanks for listening.

[thebreakfastgenie]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

Tagged by @quordleona03! I think everyone I would tag has been tagged so if you want to do it consider yourself tagged and tag me so I can see it!

How many works do you have on Ao3?

29

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

89,648

3. What fandoms do you write for?

MASH, The West Wing, Star Trek TOS

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

'Til Death (Un)does Us Part The Wideness of the World Expenses hills like white elephants Fortune Cookie Wisdom

5. Do you respond to comments?

I like to and I try to but I get overwhelmed so sometimes I don't manage to do it. Positive feedback makes me extremely anxious so it's hard sometimes (I love it, don't get me wrong, but I get itchy).

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Downpour

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably reconciliation

8. Do you get hate on fics? I never have! I never even get negative comments, although I totally welcome critical comments. I never got hate in the fanfiction.net era, either. I've been fortunate.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I don't, but I would like to start! I think I want to start with m/f, even though the experience I have to draw on is f/f, but ultimately I want to do it all. I'm starting with more vanilla stuff, because I'm not so much interested in writing erotica as I am in being able to depict sex in prose. I'm open to writing kinkier stuff eventually but for now I'm just trying to add a tool (hehe) to my writer's toolbox.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I wrote one once; it was actually the first fic I posted, and it was an Ace Attorney/NCIS crossover. I was in middle school. It's still out there but I will not be linking it. I like crossovers but it's very hard to make them work, so I mostly play around with them in silly posts and bullet points, not full fics.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I would be honored if someone did translate one.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I don't think so! I've co-developed ideas with friends but it's always one of us ultimately writing it. I don't know how good at co-writing I would be because I'm a perfectionist control freak and also very slow.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Fic wise, probably Kirk/Spock. There are other ships I love a lot and outside a fic context I'm not sure I could ever pick, but I actually write very few ships and I think Kirk/Spock is the One. Runner up would be the Doctor/Rose Tyler, I wrote them once and I have fic-y feelings about them. I've never read or written them because I don't do fandom for this series but Indiana Jones/Marion Ravenwood have had my heart since I was twelve and I'd sell most of my ships for them. Also House/Cuddy is a ship of all time but I don't really like any House fic. I love CJ/Danny and Josh/Donna as well as some other West Wing ships but they're not the main attraction to me and most of the fic I write does not focus on them.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I was planning to write more of The Wideness of the World and at this point I doubt I'll write Hamilton fic again but I had some really good ideas and I like that fic enough that it bugs me. Still, it stands fine as it is.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, characterization, restraint, attention to detail. Hopefully pacing, I'm very aware of it but I don't know if I'm successful enough for it to be a strength. I'm playing a lot with structure and literary devices right now but I'm not sure they count as a strength yet. I guess willingness to experiment is the strength.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Action, description, sex. Sex is the worst because it's action involving body parts we have stupid words for. Being slow, horrible writer's block because I'm too much of a perfectionist to write a rough draft.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

It's very, very hard to do well. I think in most fic cases, either the POV character knows what's being said and you can just write it in English (or whatever language the rest is in) or the POV character can't understand it and you can just say "they were speaking x language and they didn't understand." If I felt I really needed to include dialogue in another language I'd find someone who could help me translate and credit them.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

NCIS

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

The Emergency Room but if I actually manage to finish my time loop WIP....

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

Jack is an asshole and a bully and most important he is MANIPULATIVE. I don't believe what Ed says about Jack because Jack is manipulating Ed the entire time he's on board The Revenge, and Ed doesn't see it. Jack knows how to play Ed and he does it flawlessly. He's an asshole and he's a bully and he's a piece of shit. He's not secretly insecure or actually nice. You feel that way and want him to be that way for the same reason Izzy delusionists think Izzy is the victim: you have overidentified and projected yourself onto him. You also resent Stede (flat out hate him, it seems) so OF COURSE you latch on to a character who bullies him. You have said yourself he should be bullied. You're not right about Calico Jack... and given that his actor hasn't even acknowledged the role in public, I highly doubt we're ever going to get a flashback. If we do it isn't going to prove you right, though. Because you're not. You're just another Stede hater latching on to a white antagonist.

I've been rotating power bottom CJ and sub top Stede fucking for Ed's entertainment. I made a lil sketch, should I write a PWP do you think?

[partiallystarsif]

I’ve been quiet here a long time, huh.

I apologize for that, and thank you all for your patience. For those who don’t follow my other blogs, I got sick at the beginning of the year and have been fighting my way back to something that feels normal ever since. I think I’m close to it again finally, and have been trying to get back to work on both Speaker and Partially Stars.

As a peace offering and a gift for waiting so long for me, I present: a playlist. 26 songs, featuring 2 for each crewmember plus a few others!

(Here on Spotify)

The game should be along before much longer as well. Just a bit more coding to do 🖤

Track list below the cut:

01. Satellite Call - Sara Bareilles You may find yourself in the dead of night / Lost somewhere up there in the great big beautiful sky

02. No Plan - Hozier There's no plan, there's no race to be run / The harder the pain, honey, the sweeter the sun

03. [Akina] I'll Be Good - Jaymes Young I'll be good, I'll be good / And I'll love the world, like I should / Yeah, I'll be good, I'll be good / For all of the times that I never could

04. [Akina] Different Kind of Knight - Christian Kane See I'm a different kind of knight / You're gonna find your fairy tales are lies / I don't have a white horse / But you can come along for the ride.

05. [Ahmed] Fake Happy - Paramore See I'm gonna draw my lipstick wider than my mouth / And if the lights are low they'll never see me frown

06. [Ahmed] Fistfight - The Ballroom Thieves The day I finally met you like I knew I would / You raised me from the wreck of my doubt / You were smiling to yourself as if we both understood / The silent language of the anguish of a heart that sings but doesn't make a sound

07. [Q] Outside Of This Town - Christone "Kingfish" Ingram I'm so tired of doing the same old thing / Shooting for the highest star / Want people to remember my name

08. [Q] Something Just Like This - The Chainsmokers & Coldplay Where d'you wanna go? / How much you wanna risk? / I'm not looking for somebody / With some superhuman gifts

09. [Sun] On To The Next - Tyler Bryant & The Shakedown I got nothing to lose / Nothing to hide, nothing to prove / Put your money in your mouth, roll the dice, make a bet / Stack up your chips, watch me push 'em off the edge

10. [Sun] Start a Fire - Ryan Star Here we go / Just lose control and let your body give in / To the beat / Of your heart as my hand touches your skin / Is this love / Or just sexual desire / We're gonna start a fire

11. [Mack] Still Breathing - Green Day As I walked out on the ledge / Are you scared to death to live? / And I've been running all my life / Just to find a home that's for the restless / And the truth that's in the message / Making my way away, away

12. [Mack] Love Sneakin' Up On You - Bonnie Raitt I gotta know, do you feel the same? / Do you just light up at the mention of my name? / Don't worry baby, it ain't nothin new / That's just love sneakin up on you

13. [CJ] Watch Me While I Bloom - Hayley Williams If you feel like you're never gonna reach the sky / 'Til you pull up your roots, leave your dirt behind / Mmh, baby you got a lot of shit to learn

14. [CJ] In Your Eyes - Gavriel All I know is I can't get you off my mind / I'm still unsure if uncertainty is certain doom / Then it goes right back to you / And I can't remember being blue

15. [Smith] Heaven's Got A Back Door - Dead Sara I'm through feeling sorry / For the things that I can't choose / If I made it this far being who I am / Maybe heaven's got a back door too

16. [Smith] One Woman Man - John Legend From the moment that I met you / Knew that I would never let you / Slip away, it's okay / You can make me / A one woman man

17. [Harper] All I Really Want - Alanis Morissette And all I really want is some patience / A way to calm the angry voice / And all I really want is deliverance

18. [Harper] Like Real People Do - Hozier I will not ask you where you came from / I will not ask you and neither would you / Honey just put your sweet lips on my lips / We should just kiss like real people do

19. [Walker] I'm With You - Avril Lavigne I'm looking for a place / I'm searching for a face / Is anybody here I know / 'Cause nothing's going right / And everything's a mess / And no one likes to be alone

20. [Walker] Wicked Game - Chris Isaak What a wicked game you play, to make me feel this way / What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you

21. [REDACTED] My Way - PVRIS I don't ever fight, just blow a kiss / And I got two fists but I'm a pacifist / I'd rather stay high and just take, take, take the hit

22. [REDACTED] As Long As You Love Me - The Backstreet Boys And how you got me blind is still a mystery / I can't get you out of my head / Don't care what is written in your history / As long as you're here with me

23. [Stowaway] Man In The Box - Alice In Chains I'm the man in the box / Buried in my shit / Won't you come and save me? / Save me

24. [Stowaway] Sweet Surrender - Sarah McLachlan It doesn't mean much / It doesn't mean anything at all / The life I've left behind me is a cold room / I've crossed the last line / From where I can't return / Where every step I took in faith betrayed me / And led me from my home

BONUS 25. Firefly Main Title - Sonny Rhodes

26. The Real Folk Blues - Mai Yamane

[im-in-love-with-pizza-bites]

To Raise Children: Chapter 8

Chris Evans X Daughter!Reader, Grandpa!Chris Evans X Flynn and Felix Evans (OCs) Tom Holland X Single-Mom!Reader (Slow Burn)

Series Masterlist

Series Summary: It's been 4 years, your sons are starting kindergarten, you're starting junior year of college, a lot has changed.

Chapter Summary: Career day?

Series Warnings: Age gap (Reader is 20, Tom is 29), absent father, mentions teen pregnancy, mentions abortion, if you see anymore please let me know politely.

Chapter Warnings: little angsty.

Sequel to "It Takes A village"

You were gonna let it blow over. Someone was bound to leak their faces eventually. Besides so far most of the fans were being nice and polite about it. Others were shaming you saying shit about how your dad shouldn't be watching them since they aren't his kids. You ignored it, it wasn't hurting any one. You just hope that Jake, the boy's father doesn't see it. You don't want him to try to contact you. You cut off most people from texas, minus a few friend, and your mom. Though you didn't talk to your mom much.

"Mommy it's career day tomorrow!" Flynn said happily.

"Really? Do you want me to go in?" You asked.

"Me and Flynn both get to bring someone so Felix is gonna bring you and I'm gonna bring Poppy so both of you get to come!" You smiled, other than the fact your job is a cashier at Walmart so you don't have an "exciting" job.

"Yeah! We're gonna ask him when we get home!" Felix said happily as they both buckled themselves into their car seats. You checked both of the car seats before getting in and buckling yourself in.

"I bet he'll say yes."

———

You were sat in the back of the classroom. You already talked to the class. It was short, just talked about how you were working. Chris is up there now, you were sitting by another mom.

"You're the twins mom?" She asked smiling.

"Yeah. Which one is yours?" You asked her smiling. She looked only a few years older than you, probably 26.

"Mine is little Milo there. He talks about your sons a lot. I think they're friends."

"Really? That's great! I'm y/n what's your name?"

"It's Kathleen."

"Nice to meet you." You smiled before feeling your phone buzz in your pocket. "Uh I'll be right back." You excused and quietly snuck into the hallway. It was one of your friends from texas, one you don't talk to much but didn't block since he hates Jake but enjoys spilling the town gossip to you every few months. Including how Jake got another girl pregnant, and how she put her baby girl up for adoption which means your kids do have a sister roaming the earth.

"I can't talk I'm at the boy's school." You said answering the phone.

"Did something happen?" The man on the other side asked concern clear in his voice.

"Nah it's Career day."

"Oh don't you work at Walmart that's a boring job."

"Cj what do you want?" You asked him.

"Oh yeah. Uh it's about Jake."

"I don't care."

"He saw the paparazzi photo. There's word of him wanting to contact you." Cj, which stands for Charles John said.

"Shit. He doesn't have my number right? I changed it. No one gave him my number right?"

"Probably not everyone who has it hates it as far as I know." Charles assured.

"Okay Thank you Cj Uh I'll talk to you later."

———

"I'm sorry sweet pea." Chris said looking really guilty. He felt bad for not noticing the paparazzi even though it's not his fault.

"It's not your fault dad. Besides I already did my research. He has no parental rights because he's not on their birth certificates." You explained. "I just don't want to deal with him. He has no parental rights, but... He could still fight for custody and I don't want the towns with him. He didn't want them he- he doesn't deserve to be a dad."

"Sweetheart. No judge in their right mind would give a dad who didn't want them. Especially since he lives in Texas with his parents. And I doubt he could afford to live in Boston. Do you still have all those texts from him and his family?"

"Yeah." You nodded.

"Then you have proof, now no more worrying." He ruffled your hair before saying: "Your nana invited us all over for dinner so you should get yourself and the boys ready Sweetie."

"Okay dad... I love you."

"Love you too bubba."

Taglist: @fic-for-readers @denisemarieangelina @thevelvetseries @kaitieskidmore1 @ellerosie2332 @tahniemarie @runawayolives @marajillana @buckybarnez @positivelyholland @firehoseevan @coldmuffinpartycloud @beautifulrose0809 @believinghurts @laura-naruto-fan1998 @shadow-dixon @claaaaaaire-blog @mrs-brekker15 @h-j-s-03 @moniffazictress11 @buxkybarnes @ducks118 @kalopsia-flaneur @silverrmist @some-lovely-day @peterparkerbae @Olivia197810 @gengen64 @snigdha-14 @hollzo-03 @bubb1eana1ee @cmalas

[pvremichigan]

🗣 CJ & IJ ?

"Ah jeez where do I start..."

"CJ. Now I've never been able to have children due to my kind, nor do I want to have any. But he has been the son I never thought I needed and the friend I never thought I'd have. That boy brought me back into this world after I hid away yet again. He's seen me at my worst and best and his loyalty is unfaltering. The closer we grew, the more pain I felt for his suffering growing up. I don't know every single detail, but he shared with me something he hasn't shown many people, if anyone else at all. He trusts me. I trust him. Fully. I know how other people view him but they don't see him like I do. They don't see the love he can express because they don't deserve it. He's one smart fucking kid. Pretty much a genius. He has unbelievable talent and skill. Despite the fucking hell he walked through, he still came out with a crown on his head."

"I envy him, I do... At times I even look up to him. A human of all people, imagine that... In fact, I see his entire worth. I don't think he'll ever be able to love himself the way I love him but that's okay... A mothers love is far different than the love you give yourself. However... I hope I can teach him how to love himself. He is far more than he realizes."

"The government thinks this is a game... Until it eventually comes around to bite them in the ass." "CJ means the world to me. I love that boy so fuckin' much. Sometimes I start to worry... Even cry a little knowing someday he's going to have to go. Pass on... It hurts. It hurts when I consider the fact that he grew up with only himself and his buddy to rely on. But I know I have to be strong for the both of us."

"He's got a childlike side too. I've seen him, he's goofy. He's a dumbass sometimes. He's so loving. He has skills I never even knew he had. Sometimes I feel like I could spend days around him just listening to his stupid stories and fun antics him and his friends get into. He's so passionate, I would hate to ever see that passion burn out."

"I can't lose him... There's something different about him, man, I swear... I know he's human but he feels like far more."

"He's a blessing. He's a gift..."

"He's hope."

Uh oh on to the next guy!

"I don't wanna do this one."

That sucks! Anyways.

"IJ. Well... I'm hesitating on this a lot. Not out of hatred, but more out of my stubborn prideful nature. I can't say anything bad about him. He's proven every single negative theory I had about him wrong. Every obstacle I try to throw his way just to catch him messing up and he leaps those hurdles like it's a walk in the park. It breaks my heart because the whole time... His eyes are on me. I've never had that. I don't know what to do with this..."

"It's overwhelming, it's too much. Yet if any of it is reeled back at this point, I'll end up grasping it for dear life. Maybe it's just me trying to adjust but it's all so intense."

"Maybe because he's finally giving me what I didn't realize I always needed and longed for. Y'know if you starve and end up indulging on food... You get sick. This is my ailment."

"An illness I wouldn't cure for the life of me."

"He's changed a lot. He's no where near who he used to be. The version of him I hated. He's become everything I adore and admire. And after everything I've had to fuckin' deal with, it ain't selfish to admit that his devotion and inseparable loyalty for me are the thing I needed most. I don't need to be worshipped or praised. I just need what he's giving. I feel like a leech sometimes craving this shit but he reminds me constantly that he has so much love and loyalty to give that I doubt this scratches the surface."

"He never left my side. He's always been about me. He's always been here for me, it's always been me. He could've chosen anywhere else to live, anyone else to stay with. Not saying he only lives for me, I'd fucking hate that. He has individuality, he's his own person. He doesn't put himself below me, he doesn't put himself last."

"I don't know... I don't know if it's too soon to say this to this degree... It's only been two months. We've only been together two months."

"But knowing him for two years... Hating him for 90% of it... I wonder if that hatred towards the end was just projection or not because..."

"I love him. I love him too much, it feels like."

"I just... Really fuckin' love him. I wish I could slow down, take this slower and not run into things just to be safe but the more I hold back, the more I run faster."

"He's so fucking cool too, have you seen his abilities?! Dude has BLACK BLOOD, you kiddin'? And those eyes? The fucking gold in them? Holy fuck... It's not just gold tinted, it looks like tiny flakes of gold. It's so bizarre. I hate what they did to him in that facility, whatever bullshit they put him through but he turned out beautiful. And I don't use that lightly."

"And his fucking voice?"

She runs a hand down her mouth in frustrated disbelief. You could consider it a swoon but she will not call it that and neither will you.

"I don't find people attractive often, it's a very rare thing for me. But this motherfucker? I hate it, I HATE it because I feel like I could go on for hours. Maybe it's not attraction, maybe it's infatuation. But still, it's something and it might be too fuckin' much for anybody at this point."

"He's done a lot for me. He's proven all my worries wrong. Doesn't mean I won't still worry, but I... I don't think I'm scared anymore. I think I can trust him a little more with his promises. Only time will tell but... I trust him to make the right decisions."

"I'm glad he invaded my life. I'm glad he wouldn't leave me alone."

"He's everything I love. Not just personally, but in general."

"I'm beyond glad we met."

"I'm beyond glad I met both of them. They're my boys... I wouldn't trade them for the world."