#CHEESYPUFFKINS87 UR TAKING AN L

[zumicho]

BRACE YOURSELF MITCH

𝗰𝘄: mentions of cheating, slight angst

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When was the last time you stood up? Your legs were beginning to grow numb, knees sore and tingly against the ground as you hunched before the synthetic glow of a laptop screen. A long emptied energy drink can sat dormant on your lap, forgotten in the swarm of schemes that bounced around the walls excitedly in Suna’s bedroom. 

Suna was beside you, feverishly penning down what was happening. It was a neatly lined table: the first column was for names, the second for dates, and the third for offenses. 

The name of your ex-boyfriend. October 31st. Cheated on you with your friend.

The name of your friend. October 31st. Hooked up with your ex-boyfriend.

The name of Suna’s old roommate. June 17th. Took the cash out of his wallet and ran.

The name of a girl you hardly knew. February 5th. Keyed Suna’s new rustbucket for parking in “her spot.”

“Think that’s enough to start off?” He peered up at you groggily, flexing out his spent fingers with a wince. You nodded, eyes trailing the list of thirty or so names, “More than enough.” Of the names were people who had wronged you, who had wronged your friends, who had wronged friends of friends and their friends, too. It was practically untraceable. 

Suna sniffed, thinking, then scooted next to you to examine his laptop screen, “Smart.” 

You felt yourself flush at the subtle praise, chalking it up to the unreasonable amount of caffeine in your system, then glanced back at your work. “Well,” you murmured sheepishly, “At sight was taken.” 

Rintaro rolled his eyes, a lethargic shrug following, “Dumb name, anyways, sounds too romantic.” You snickered, “What? I thought it was a good play on words. Like love at first sight, just, not…love.” You both chuckled dryly at this, slightly delusional with exhaust. It was hard to make time for this, it was even harder to plan this, and the execution was no easy feat, either. 

“I like this name you picked better. Sounds kinda confrontational, ya’know?” 

You licked your lips, then snapped impatiently, a queue for him to hand you the extensive list in handwriting only you seemed to be able to read at that point.

“Chicken scratch.” You muttered, earning a groan from him as his watchful eyes ensured you typed every word to a tee. 

Suna was your best friend. Suna was the best of the best. The cream of the crop. The apple of your eye. The only person you think, no, you know would ever want to take things this far.

It was a little past four in the morning by the time you finished, sighing in satisfaction as he rubbed your back, “Nice.”

You turned to face him, the tips of your noses inches apart; how many times had you been this close on his floor? Too many to count, surely, but why did it feel so different lately? Especially in that moment as you both dove headfirst into your favorite secret you ever will keep. The secret you’d keep in the years to come. 

“Is this a bad idea?” You mumbled abashedly, balling your sweaty palm. Suna’s expression lightened and he shrugged once more for the umpteenth time, “Maybe, but…” he clicked his tongue in thought, “we’ve wanted this for a while.”

It’s decided. You nod. This is a very good bad idea, indeed. 

Turning back to the computer, you mashed around on the keyboard, deft fingers pressing at the clacking mouse on the floor, “Okay,” you sighed. “It’s live.”

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𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀:

✱ "THEY DID IT!!! THEY SAID THE THING!!!!" ass moment

✱ formal apology to anyone i may have unintentionally (it was slightly intentional) led to believe that they murdered someone, or, that one person who thought they were vampires (I liked that theory the best)

✱ y/n and suna are no strangers to controversy

✱ spiteful bitches who match each other's toxic freak

𝗮/𝗻: hehe sorry this is a bit late. everything is about to go to shit. also ree (who is unfortunately not here to see it, fly high!) and i looked up the actual onsight.com and it was a python coding wtv the fuck...starting a gofundme for me to buy the domain /j

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