#But u are a fellow horror fan so I know u will understand me has hisđ«¶
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hi oz!!!! i'm in your inbox :D! for the saw trap game: toji đ?
Tw: blood, injury, saws
Pls donât hate me forever and ever but I wanna put him in the pendulum trap Iâm sorry Iâm sorry I know itâs impossible to get out of I know no one can survive it and also itâs like maybe one of the most gory but I just. I just want that for horny reasons pls donât psychoanalyze me also alternatively Iâll give him the ten pints is sacrifice bc I feel like he could just do it no problem like heâs definitely suffered through worse whatâs some saws slashing into his arms
Send me ur fav and Iâll assign them a saw trap<3
#IM SORRYYYYYYYY#But u are a fellow horror fan so I know u will understand me has hisđ«¶#ask#mutuals!#ask game
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Interview with sugamins about her work House of Cards (Ao3âČs second most hit English work and most hit BTS work)
Before You Read the Interview
Archive of Our Own Transcript
Reddit Transcript Part 1 / Part 2
House of Cards is documented within the Top 50 Most Hit BTS Works on Archive of Our Own Project, otherwise known as T50BTS, by Charmedseoul. It is the second most hit English work on the Archive of Our Own platform, most hit BTS work, and 16th most hit work overall. It centers around the internationally popular K-Pop idol group BTS (Bangtan Sonyeondan) with the main characters being Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung, and Jeon Jungkook. This work is being documented for historical purposes for the Fanlore website with its own page. Charmedseoul is a BTS-focused anonymous historian who plans to eventually document each of the top 50 most hit BTS work on Ao3 as in depth as this one. If you are in contact with any of the authors of these works, please contact her on Twitter @charmedseoul or on Tumblr @charmedseoull.
Parts of this interview have been edited with links to Fanlore and Wikipedia pages for understanding. Any information in [brackets] serves for further clarity for readers and elaboration of information.
Disclaimers: This interview contains spoilers for the BTS Archive of Our Own work House of Cards. The storyâs Archive of Our Own tags contain violence and gangster activity, along with discussion of prostitution and drug use. The full tag list is:
Alternate Universe - Gangsters
Gang Violence
Violence
Drugs
Drug Use
Explicit Sexual Content
Explicit Language
Blood and Gore
Blood and Torture
Gambling
Gunplay
Undercover
Disturbing Themes
Homophobic Language
Attempted Rape/Non-Con
Xenophobia
Dom/sub
Threesome - M/M/M
Drug Addiction
Dubious Consent
This interview discusses an 18+ mature work and Not Safe for Work topics. Please read this interview at your own discretion. You are responsible for the content you consume.
House of Cards by sugamins is a multi-chapter Archive of Our Own fanfiction that follows police officer Kim Taehyungâs undercover operation into the gangster world of Haedogje Pa. Jeon Jungkook, shrouded in an air of mystery and dubbed âThe Boy,â is the heir to this crime empire. Park Jimin lives with him, acting as a lover of sorts in a high, pristine penthouse apartment. The story follows the three and their complicated relationship where sex, violence, and drugs surround them. Kim Taehyung tries to take down the empire as his moral lines of black and white begin blurring into gray. In this crime-ridden alternate reality to Seoul, everything from the structure of the gangster world to the trust between three lovers is as fragile as a house of cards.
Now presenting the interview with sugamins, author of Archive of Our Ownâs second most hit English work and most hit BTS work, House of Cards:
How did you start writing?
How did you get into fanfiction?
How much writing experience did you have prior to House of Cards?
Do you have any literary or artistic inspirations? Any other authors or works that have inspired you to create anytime before or after House of Cards?
How did you become an ARMY [ARMY stands for Adorable Representative MC for the Youth. It is the fandom name for fans of BTS, otherwise known as Bangtan Sonyeondan]?
I started writing fanfiction in 2012. But before then, I used to enjoy writing stories as a child and young teenager. I used to write and illustrate my own stories. I even had a sketchbook filled with my own comic book, which was terrible! But I've always been creative. It started with art and then I moved onto writing when I discovered I was able to be much more creative with my words rather than my pencil.
I first got into fanfiction through my years spent on Tumblr. I had always known that it had existed, but I had never really gone looking for it because I hadn't belonged to a fandom at that point in my life. It was back in 2012 when I stumbled upon an EXO fanfic that a lot of people were talking about (Arbitrage, you can find it on Livejournal.) I read it and then thought...wow, so this is fanfiction! From that point, I started reading more and more, mostly Infinite fanfiction. And then I decided to start writing with the encouragement of an old online friend, and here I am!
In terms of writing experience, I have never formally received education. I stopped studying English Language and Literature when I was 16, instead focusing on Art, History, and Religious Education (purely because I wanted to learn about philosophy and quantum mechanics) for my final two years at high-school. The only experience I have is through writing fanfiction. I started back in 2012, and I've developed a lot since then. I started off small, writing horror short stories and little collections. Brotherhood was the first 'long fic' I created. I was shocked that it managed to get so big because I had never created a story of that size before. Writing helped me gain experience and figure out what worked and what didn't work, what I was good at writing, and where I was lacking and needed to learn. I don't think you can really experience an art form until you start doing it. You can learn all about the techniques and the conventions, but until you pick up a pen and start writing or drawing, you won't ever know what it means to create.
My literary inspiration has always been Stephen King. Which is funny, as he has described himself as 'having diarrhea of the typewriter.' I think that applies to me sometimes. I am a bit of a wordy writer, though I've started honing it down for certain stories. Sometimes, a story needs to be floral and descriptive, sometimes, it needs to be punchy and direct. So, King was my major inspiration, especially with horror. I also enjoy the works of Poe and Lovecraft (I acknowledge the problematic themes in the work of Lovercraft and seek not to praise him as a person. He was a terrible person for sure, but sadly, he had a way with cosmic horror that is hard to find.) I also enjoy Chuck Palahniuk and the dark, seedy and overall zany stories that he has created. I like his style a lot!
In terms of inspirations for House of Cards, I was obviously inspired by the films Infernal Affairs/The Departed. American Gangster and Training Day were also major inspirations (and also because I love Denzel Washington's performances in both films. I mean, who doesn't love him?) But I also drew inspiration from other sources that were less focused on gangs, more focused on the dark, nihilistic state of the world around us. I couldn't recommend the TV series True Detective hard enough. It is one of the best series I have ever watched. It handles dark and disturbing content so well, and its fractured, unreliable story-telling and philosophical musing is some of the best I've ever seen on screen. I highly recommend checking it out, but be sure to check the content warning and triggers because it certainly isn't suitable for younger audiences and those with triggers. In terms of real-life content, I think Ross Kemps' docu-series are very good. Particularly Extreme World and On Gangs. His docu-series show the dark and disturbing side of criminal activity, the drug trade and more.Â
I became a fan of BTS [Bangtan Sonyeondan] back in 2013. I had already been a fan of K-Pop for some time by then, as I had started listening to various K-Pop and K-Rock artists back in 2009. I knew of their debut, but I had seen hundreds of new acts debut by the time that they broke into the scene, and so I didn't pay much heed. Someone I followed on Tumblr at the time kept posting about how much she loved them, especially Taehyung [BTS V/Kim Taehyung]. One day, I stumbled upon a gifset of Yoongi [BTS Suga/Min Yoongi] being sarcastic in one of their first interviews. I thought he was funny, so I decided to check them out. At the time, they had recently released We Are Bulletproof Pt. 2 [BTSâs second music video release with their debut album 2 Kool 4 Skool]. I followed them from that point, and their first comeback [A âcomebackâ refers to when a K-Pop idol group releases new music, usually done twice a year.] was also my first comeback. I liked their music [BTS released Boy In Luv and Just One Day in 2014, both music videos of songs from their Skool Luv Affair EP.], but I liked them even more as individuals. I loved watching their shows [Here is a link to BTSâs schedule during 2014 when they had their first comeback. You can find the shows and interviews they were on there.], even though they are incredibly embarrassing to look back on now. They just had so much energy and looked to be having so much fun that I was having fun just watching them. I was a fan, I liked a lot of their songs and followed their activities. But it wasn't until they released HYYH Part One [Hwa Yang Yeon Hwa Part 1 (Korean) = The Most Beautiful Moment in Life Pt. 1 (This is the title in English), released with the I Need U and Dope music videos.] that I really became a fan of their music. I had already created a couple of small horror stories for the fandom at that point. HYYH Part One [The Most Beautiful Moment in Life Pt. 1] inspired me so much that I created Brotherhood, my first 'long fic.' I joined AO3 [Archive of Our Own] and started posting there. I received so much support from fellow fans that I carried on writing, and the rest is history!
How has your experience being an ARMY [Adorable Representative MCs of the Youth, BTSâs global fan base name.] been? Did you ever leave the fandom then come back? How did you interact with others when you first got into the fandom and as you grew up?
How have you been since you wrote House of Cards? What have you been working on?Â
Are you okay with talking about how old you are now and how old you were when you wrote House of Cards?
Before you even wrote House of Cards, what inspired it? Any TV shows? Music? Movies? Books? Ideas? It could be anything.
How did you start writing House of Cards? Did you finish the entire story then publish it or did you write it as you went? What was the writing process like?
Did you have any beta readers or editors? If you did, are you still in contact with them now? How did they feel about your work?
My experience being a fan has mostly been positive over the years. In the earlier days, back around when I first started writing for the fandom, it was certainly much more positive. I've received so much support over the years, not only in my writing but in my personal life from readers and fellow fans that being a fan of the boys [The members of BTS] really has changed my life. That's not an exaggeration. I doubt I would even be here now without those years having such a positive effect on my mental health. I've never really been the kind to interact with others and form cliques within the fandom, I just like being in my own space and interacting with everyone that comes my way, I guess?
These days, I'm not as active as a writer or in fandom spaces however. I feel like my time in the fandom has started to come up and I don't know how I feel about it just yet. I feel nostalgic for the time when I was first starting out in the fandom and I didn't really know much, but everything was fun. It doesn't feel so fun now, but I mostly contribute that to the effect that Twitter has had on shaping the fandom's growth. Twitter has never been a good place for creatives within fandoms because of issues with algorithms and such. Tumblr was always the better website for hosting artistic content for a variety of reasons. So, I think the fact that everything is on Twitter now has been partly responsible for my decline in engagement and overall enjoyment. I'm currently taking a break from Twitter. The next couple of months will be what makes me either stay or leave the fandom.
Since writing House of Cards, I've been an active writer in the fandom. Over the years, I've added quite a lot of stories to my AO3 accounts and various pseuds. My largest ongoing story is another gang story, set in the 1980s, called Valentino Summers. I actually started writing and publishing it on Ao3 just four or so months after I finished House of Cardsâwhich is wild to think about. Finally finishing House of Cards seems like such a long time ago in my mind, and yet I'm still working on a story I created that same year! I like contributing horror stories to the fandom, especially in the Halloween period. I like publishing series in the month/upcoming weeks before Halloweenâthough I won't be doing so this year [2020].
When I started writing House of Cards, I would have just turned 22. It was inspired by the song 'Wires' by The Neighbourhood. I might be mistaken, but I believe that Jungkook [BTS Jungkook/Jeon Jungkook] posted a tweet with the song in it. [Jungkook did tweet about this song. Here is the English translation.] I had never heard of the band before, but my partner was a fan of their music. She sent the song to me and I was very interested in the lyrics, so I started discussing them with her. One thing led to the next, and then we had basically come up with the entire plot of the story. We just needed to create the characters. We spent a little while doing so, and then I started doing some research and started writing the story. There really isn't a grand backstory to House of Cards, it just happened so fast. We often come up with story ideas like that, and my partner is responsible for a huge amount of my stories. She has the creative visions, which I then turn into words. We make quite the team, haha~ The inspirations, I mentioned those in my previous answer regarding films and TV shows.
I published the story as I went, though I staggered the updates because I didn't want to post too frequently. I had the entire story planned out from the startââI didn't change a single aspect of the story no matter what I received in terms of feedback. I think a lot of readers assume that writers might tweak things if they sense the audience wants something to happen in terms of plot or relationships. Personally, I don't like doing that. I like sticking to my plans even if I know my vision might not be what the readers want. I think it's important for the story to be created the way I see it because my vision is what made me create it, if that makes sense.
The writing process was surprisingly smooth! You might not think it because the story is big and there are a lot of characters and plot threads to keep on top of, but it went smoothly for me. It flowed just as smoothly from start to finish as Brotherhood did. I never struggled once with writing the chapters, nor did I ever get stuck and wonder if I should change the content in order to make it easier to write. I'm surprised that I managed to complete it so easily because that's not the case with writing now! I tend to be a lot slower now, more deliberate and more open to changes in order to ease the process and the overall flow of the story. In a way, this change has been for the best. I do wonder what House of Cards would be like if I were to write it now, with my different approach to planning and writing. It would probably have a quicker flow, and the word count would either go down as a result of cuts, or go up because of additional scenes I would have likely included.
I didn't have any betas, which you can probably tell from the work. My stories are so big that I never wanted to put the burden of fixing them onto someone else. I know they are imperfect, oftentimes bloated things, but that's just what they are. I did try creating a story with another writer in the past, but it didn't go very well. She would often have conflicting opinions on things and would not have any leeway for anything I suggested, whereas I always had leeway to allow her to change things. Even to the point of completely changing the plot of the story that I had already started writing, and then allowing her to add graphic sexual content she didn't even want to be in the story. She actually stopped writing fanfiction randomly in the middle of us creating the story! She made a post about it being disgusting and nasty and then bowed out. I have no clue if she ever came back! So, my negative experience with attempting to work with someone else when creating a story kind of made me not want to have a beta. It's a wild story, I know!
House of Cards is praised for its realism and accuracy with weaponry, torture, sex, and violence. How did you research these things?
How did you come up with the gangster universe in House of Cards? How did you develop Haedogje Pa?
How did you name the original characters in House of Cards? Did any characters in particular take inspiration from existing characters in TV shows, anime, books, any type of media?
How did you decide on Vminkook as your main characters for the story? What do you see in their dynamic and them as characters?
Jimin is claimed to be one of the best written characters in the entire story. What was your thought process when characterizing him and developing him?
Taehyung is an especially dynamic character whose morals get tested time and time again in House of Cards. What was your thought process when characterizing him and developing him?
Jungkook is one of the characters that the readers spend the least amount of time getting a perspective from, but is incredibly well written in his character progression. What was your thought process when characterizing him and developing him?
When it came to various aspects in the story, I did do research. Most of it never really had an impact on the story itself. For example, I would be looking up gun models that are used by law enforcement agencies around the world and trying to find specs of them so I could learn how many bullets each gun held, or how much a magazine could hold. In action scenes, I didn't want my characters firing off 20+ bullets for a gun thatâin realityâholds far less. That's a fact that doesn't really mean much to the average reader, but it meant something to me! I've always hated how many bullets fly through the air in action scenes in films and TV shows because I'm always wondering if it's possible with the firearms featured in the scene haha~ In terms of torture, I've come across the subject through various documentaries and TV shows about gangs, crime and serial killers. I didn't really do much additional research into the topic, beyond reading up on what I had come across to make sure it wasn't fictionalised for drama purposes. Obviously, there will be some lack of realism in my story because I couldn't possibly write a realistic portrayal of gang violence and torture when I have zero personal experience with it. My aim wasn't to give the story 'full' realism (I'll explain more about that in the next question) but to simply create a world that felt real, even if there were little aspects that had to be exaggerated for the sake of the story. Taehyung's behaviour when undercover certainly broke many procedures. The only thing working in his favour that allowed him to get away with it is that the crimes he committed couldn't be directly traced to him. But a real undercover agent would never do the things that he did on behalf of the gang. Basically, this means that the entire story is unrealistic! But of course, it wouldn't be very entertaining if Taehyung simply observed from the background and didn't dirty his hands. So, I had to bend and break the rules a little!
For the universe, I knew that I couldn't base it too much in reality. Because of basic Korean law, it would have been impossible for me to write the gang operating in the way they did in the storyâespecially with guns. Most Korean gangs tend to use other forms of violence and weapons in order to control their respective areas, rather than guns. My other story, Taste of Ink, has what I would consider a more realistic approach to gang activityâwith the main weapons being knives, baseball bats, etc. and the main forms of violence being assault instead of flat-out murder. So, for the sake of allowing guns to appear in the story, I had to create a Neo-Seoul, so to speak. I took inspiration from Korean gangs, and mixed it with influences from other gang cultures in order to create 'Haedogje Pa.'
When it comes to naming original characters, I honestly don't put much thought into it. I like to use real names for inspiration. I often Google various Korean films I've watched and read the cast list in order to find interesting character and actor names. This is because I have a habit of reusing names sometimes. For example, readers of my stories might have come across a couple of Daesu and Goohee characters. Do you know where I got these names from? I picked Daesu from Oh Daesu - Choi Minsik's character in Oldboy. Goohee comes from the manhwa 'Let Dai' - he is the stubborn gang leader that actually has a good heart beneath his rough exterior. I ended up liking him the most by the end of the story, so his name is one that often comes to mind when I need to pick an original character name.
I never really consider real life dynamics when I'm writing because my stories are so detached from reality that it seems pointless including any inspiration from reality. I chose the three main characters simply because, at the time, they seemed to fit the character moulds the best. The other characters fit their respective characters so well (especially Namjoon [BTS RM/Kim Namjoon] and Yoongi) that I simply thought it was best to have Taehyung, Jimin [BTS Jimin/Park Jimin] and Jungkook as the three lead roles. I chose them more based on how I thought they could personally fit the characters, rather than focus on the dynamic. To use Taehyung as an example, I thought that he would fit the character of the informant in my story because in reality, he is intelligent and seemed like he would suit the role. For Jimin, I thought he would be a good choice for a character that some might think is vulnerable or even weak. He is actually very strong and the most important character for the plot progression. For Jungkook, I liked the thought of someone with such an innocent outer appearance hiding a dark secret.
I'm so glad that readers took to Jimin so positively on a whole. I know there are some that hated him, or that hated the fact I chose him for such a role (a 'negative' sex worker role). But Jimin is the most important character for the plot progression. It is through him that the entire plan finally culminates in the explosive finish. I wanted to treat him with care because I understood that his character could go very wrong if not handled correctly. It would have been easy for him to simply become nothing more than a sexual prop, should the story have focused too much on Taehyung and Jungkook as the key players. So, I decided to subvert it by giving Jimin the ultimate hand in the story and allowing him to have more control than Jungkook in the end. If Jimin had not decided to follow through with the plan, if he had decided to snitch or had simply refused to do his part in exposing the gang, the story would've ended drastically differently. But I also didn't want to write Jimin taking control of the entire situation at the end because it would've felt ingenuine. He is a character that has been deeply affected by a lifetime of trauma. I was worried that some might take my portrayal of his trauma the wrong way, and see him not as a character that has suffered immense mental damage but rather as an annoying, weak character that gets in the way of more 'interesting' dynamics. I'm sure there will be readers that think that. Mentally traumatized individuals are often seen in such negative light, be they fictional characters or real people. When writing his character, especially in the later scenes, I wanted to make sure the trauma he experienced would shape his behaviour. Writing the scene of him getting ready to leave, when he is taking his pills and he doesn't think he can do it, it was hard. It was hard getting into that headspace of feeling so powerless in the moment and knowing that freedom is in reach, but not knowing how to achieve it. He was a difficult character to write, but I think he turned out just right in the end.
Taehyung was probably the best character to write. I love characters that start off so morally upright and pristine, and by the end of the story, their backs are bending and close to breaking from the weight of their conscience and misdeeds. His character has many facets to him that made his perspectives so interesting to tackle. From his green days in the gang, where he is horrified by the violence he sees, to the changes in his psyche as he starts to become desensitized to it all. Fundamentally, Taehyung begins the story as a good man, a hero, but by the end, there is no black and white thinking. He has become grey, muddied from his time spent in the gang. Is he a hero for bringing them down? Would a hero do the things that he did in order to bring down the gang? He killed people. He tortured people. He threatened a man with a gun, a man he knew had a deepset fear of guns that would severely trigger him. I think it all depends on how the reader sees it. The hardest thing to write for his character was his troubled descent into the relationship between him, Jungkook and Jimin, and how it affects his thought processes and emotions. I didn't want House of Cards to be seen as a romantic story when I created it. If readers see it that way, they are more than entitled to their own interpretations. I cannot tell them how they can interpret my art, that is not my role as the creator. I don't know if I effectively portrayed the co-dependency between the three main characters as well as I would've liked. But I had never tackled such a story and themes before, and so it was all new to me.
I didn't know that Jungkook had the least perspective from the three main characters. Similarly, I never really put that much effort into creating and developing his character! Jungkook simply 'happened' in the moment. He would appear in the chapter, and then his character would basically take control of the scene. I never really knew what he was going to say or do beyond my rough plans for each scene. I just waited until he appeared and let the creative spirit flow through me. That's how he came to be! I've had that happen many times in the past with charactersâthey have a life of their own and I've no control over them. In my story, Brotherhood, Taehyung happened the same way. It was impossible to write his character in that story because he was so wild and free-spirited that it didn't feel right unless his behaviour was a total spur-of-the-moment reaction to the other characters and new plot points. But with Jungkook in House of Cards, I don't know why I didn't have him planned out like the others. It's interesting to think that he might've had a good progression when I never planned any of it in detail!
Were there any original characters you particularly liked writing or enjoyed?
When you wrote for the BTS hyung line, how did you determine their roles in the story and characterize each of them?
Is there a reason behind Namjoon saying âbrotherâ or was it a consciously written character quirk?
When you handled more serious subject matter in House of Cards, how did you feel when writing it? Were you ever startled by your own work?
Was there any type of purposeful titling for the fanfiction chapters?
What was your reason for House of Cardsâ open ending?
I liked writing Lim, the original informant that helped Taehyung join the gang. I like writing characters that come across as sleazy. In his case, the sleaze was all an act and wasn't true to his character; he was affecting it for the sake of creating a persona. But I enjoy writing absolute sleaze balls tooâthe kind of guys that have chest hair and wear gold chains and thick watches, who practically ooze oil. I just find them fun! Lim was a good teacher, even when he was rough around the edges. It was sad doing what I had to do to him for the sake of the plot. But I feel like Lim understood the game as well as everyone else, and so he knew he was running on borrowed time.Â
Of course, I loved writing Bae Goohee too! He was an absolute bastard! I loved writing this figure that is spoken about throughout the story as a frightening man, one so brutal that the readers are already wary of him before he even appears in the story. I believe that Taehyung refers to him as a 'guard dog' at some point. I think Bae is the scariest character in the story for me because he is so ruthless and willing to do any order that the Jeon clan give to him. That kind of blind and unwavering devotion is frightening!
I also enjoyed writing Sungah and Jangmi. I think they're the only female characters in the story that have dialogue? Sungah has a great backstory that I unfortunately couldn't go into too much in the story, but it shaped her character a lot. I like how frank and intelligent she isâshe holds her own even in a department filled with men that receive far more praise than she does simply because she is a woman. She also allowed me to add an angle about the unfair treatment of women in jobs that have power, drawing parallels with how Taehyung faces discrimination from his fellow officers when his sexuality is abruptly revealed during the investigation. As for Jangmi, I just liked writing about the wife of a mob boss! And not one that is simply a trophy wife, but actually has a lot of power and influence across the city. I wish I had been able to feature her more, alongside her husband, Jeon himself. But I like the scenes they appear in and I enjoyed writing them.
For the rest of the members, I had Namjoon and Hoseok [BTS J-Hope/Jung Hoseok]'s characters planned right from the start. I had also created plans for Yoongi and Seokjin [BTS Jin/Kim Seokjin], but I wasn't sure how much of a role they would play in the overall story. As I started writing them, I realised that Yoongi would play an important role in both Taehyung and Jimin's character development, and so he ended up featuring a lot more than I had expected. I planned their jobs and then let them influence how I would write them. Namjoon and Hoseok's characters came naturally. Yoongi's character completely took over his job role and basic description and became a really strong character that I'm proud of. Seokjin was a little trickier because he doesn't appear in too many scenesâbut the scenes he does are integral to the plot. I needed to make sure that his character said everything he needed to in his limited scenes. He has quite the bombshell to drop after all! Seokjin was also tricky because I wanted him to have an air of mystery around him. I wanted him to be the kind of guy that not even Taehyung and his police connections would be able to unearth much about; a ghost in the system. I would've also liked for him to feature more in the story, but I feel like his character appeared in the essential scenes that the story needed. He was going to feature more in the planned sequel, being one of the first characters to appear alongside Yoongi. He was going to serve an important role, so I'm disappointed that I didn't get to show those scenes to readers.
With Namjoon, I wanted to portray him as a mature character, but not one that was conservative and stiff. I thought about having him say things like 'man' but that seemed too casual and didn't suit his character. 'Man' made him seem more like a surfer than a police officer. But when he said 'brother' in one of the scenes, I realised the word suited him better. It was fraternal, and it allowed him to show some affection towards the other characters without having to have physical contact with them. It's not the only Namjoon I've written that says 'brother' a lot. In Valentino Summers, Namjoon has experience with hippies in the neighbourhood that he lives in, so he also refers to other characters like Jimin as 'brother.' It just seems to suit him! I guess it's because I like creating Namjoon characters that are intelligent and mature, but still have a gentle and warm presence. I could picture him saying it in real life (I'm certain he already has!)
When writing serious subject matter, I'm surprised to admit that I was never shocked by what I was writing! I guess it's because I already knew that I was going to be handling dark themes. I wouldn't have tackled such subjects had I not felt comfortable doing so. Dark content isn't for everyone, and by that I don't simply mean consuming it. Creating it can be very difficult for some writers, and can even cause distress. It's not easy diving into a world that is filled with crime, pain and fear. It's even harder putting yourself into the shoes of a character that is suffering/has suffered. I was never writing in a desensitised state though. Far from it. I'm actually very sensitive to violence in reality. In fiction, it depends on the violenceâbut I'm usually not too affected by it. I've been a fan of horror since I was a child, and so I've seen a lot of nasty films filled with gore and 'shocking' deaths that never really had much of an effect on me. Unrealistic violence doesn't scare me. But when it comes to personal violence, that is always frightening to me. It's far scarier writing a scene where a character feels threatened by another character and doesn't know what is going to happen to them then, say, writing a scene of a character dying a bloody, ridiculous death in a horror story. Personal violence is much more realistic, therefore it is more unsettling to write. In House of Cards, the violence is very personal. It's in your face, it's inescapable for the characters that are involved in it. But at no point did I ever feel like I needed to stop writing because I was uncomfortable or scared by the content. If I had been uncomfortable, it would have been very reckless of me to continue writing the story.
My word of advice to fellow dark content writers: it's always important to recognise your own boundaries. There's nothing wrong with removing dark content from a story if you get a bad vibe or feel strange when writing/reviewing it. Always follow your gut instincts and never put out work that you don't like.
When writing stories, I vary between titling the chapters and leaving them blank. For House of Cards, I cannot remember the exact method for naming the chapters. Sometimes, the title comes to me when I am writing the plans and I have an idea that just suits the mood of the chapter. Other times, I have finished the entire chapter and I have to spend some time reviewing the content to decide that the title will be. In some cases, I have finished most of a whole story and I'm still not certain what to title it! I feel like with House of Cards, the titles came after the chapters were finished, or at least when they were works-in-progress.
There are some titles that really stand out to me. 'Nice Teeth' for example, is a really ridiculous title. Going into the chapter, I don't think many readers would've imagined what it could mean. 'Submachine Sodomy' is even funnier. I really can't believe I chose that as a title! I'll bet a lot of readers saw it and thought, "Oh no! Not another gunplay scene!" Luckily for them, it wasn't a reference to Jungkook's predilection for firearms in bed.
In terms of chapter titles that I really like: 'Delusions of Grandeur,' 'I Own This Fucking City,' 'Sleeping Dogs Bite' and 'Carpe-fucking-Diem.' I just feel like these titles are very well suited to the contents of the chapters. They are the kind of titles that have bite to them, that hint at action or an important plot point.
As for the open ending, there are a couple of reasons. First of all, I had planned to continue the story in a sequel that would pick up after the events of House of Cards, roughly a year on after the investigation. However, I did not pursue this sequel. I wanted House of Cards to end on an open note for the sequel to continue the story. When it comes to certain stories, I just feel that closed endings aren't always necessary. I often enjoy stories with open endings. With House of Cards, it didn't seem right just closing the book and saying it was over. There was still so much that needed to be explored. Unfortunately, I decided to not continue it. But I still think that House of Cards' ending fits the story.
Were there any scenes or moments or lines in House of Cards that you were particularly proud of or want to highlight?
If you were to write the Yoomin sequel to House of Cards, how wouldâve that looked like?
How were readersâ reactions to your work in the beginning?
Did any reader comments stick with you in particular?
How did you take the criticisms and hatred towards House of Cards for its serious subject matter? When did those types of comments start appearing? Also, where did the hatred come from? Twitter? Tumblr? Ao3 comments? Did people harass you at all or hurt you? How did you heal from that?
House of Cards has a lot of scenes. I'm proud of most of them and I think I did the best I could when writing them. I do not really like the sex scenes, but that is because I wanted to write them in a dirty, sleazy way. If I could, I would change them. I like the action scenes, especially the Gold Monkey Casino and police raid scenes. Action scenes are hard to write! Fight scenes in particular are so tricky. I often sit there, choreographing the fights so I can describe them! I loved writing Yoongi's introduction to the story, when he walks into the scene wearing nothing but his underpants.
One scene that I really liked writing is the scene where Namjoon and Hoseok investigate the USB stick that Taehyung sends to them. I personally love Namjoon and Hoseok's characters. I always enjoyed writing them. In this scene, I liked getting to write them in a setting that was not the police department office. A scene where they got to relax and banter with each other, even though they were still working. They discover a horrifying crime ring in the city, but they are left with no choice but to keep it secret because they do not want to risk blowing Taehyung's cover. I do not know why I really like this scene, I just do.
In the sequel, which focused primarily on Jimin and Yoongi, the plans were to have them reunite through Seokjinâwho has avoided jail time through a plea deal with the SMPA. They undergo a healing process together as they try to come to terms with what happened to them. Yoongi has a lot of unhealed trauma from his childhood, much like Jimin, which I only got to briefly touch upon in House of Cards. They grow closer from bonding over their traumatic experiences, and they become happier and healthier as a result. Taehyung and Seokjin were also going to be main characters, with Jungkook, Namjoon and Hoseok making supporting appearances over the duration of the story. It was going to be drastically different from House of Cards because it would be lacking in action and violence. It would have been much more intimate, with much more scenes of characters talking and discovering things about one another.
I cannot remember early reactions to the story, I just know they were positive. There was a lot of positive support from the start. As I updated and started to get more and more into the story, I received a lot of support on tumblr too. I started posting chapter previews there, as I used to get asks [On Tumblr, users are able to ask bloggers questions through an âAskâ function. This can be done anonymously or with their own blog username associated with the question.] requesting them. I got A LOT of asks on my original Tumblr from readers that wanted to discuss the characters and certain scenes. It was really interesting seeing just how much the readers were interested in the story, so much so that they wanted to learn even more about the characters and the universe I had created.
Through House of Cards, I have received comments and messages from readers that had addictions. They told me about how they recognised their own behaviors through Taehyung, and this helped them realise what was happening to them. Those comments stuck with me for obvious reasons. I have family members with addiction issues, and knowing that I could help some stranger I have never met before come to terms with their own addictive behaviours had a massive impact on me. Funnily enough, a negative comment stuck with me. It was not a bad comment, by no means meant to cause offence. It was a comment that was left on the story when I was posting the early chapters. I recall the reader asking when the story was going to pick up the pace because it was too slow. It stuck with me because, at this point in the story, Taehyung had already trained to become an undercover agent, had enrolled in the gang, had met and interacted with Jungkook, and had murdered a man. I was surprised that this amount of development had been seen as 'slow' by a reader, as I had thought the plot had been moving very fast.
I never really had any hate posted on the story when I was updating it. I got angry reactions when I had finished it. Because the story had not ended the way some readers had wanted, I think that was what caused the negative reactions. On my original Tumblr, I even got an ask about how an anon reader was going to write their own ending because my one was bad. I told them that I did not want them to take my story and change it like that. I have no idea if they ever posted the ending anywhere. The angry reactions were mostly from shippers, who were upset with the story not ending the way they had wanted. To them, I ask: what were you expecting from the story? I thought it was always obvious that Taehyung was going to do what he had set out to do from the start, so I do not think I misled readers at all. It was a story about an undercover agent taking down a gangâand that is what I wrote.
I know there was some animosity towards me on Twitter too. Twitter is a whirlpool of negativity, I am not surprised. Writing House of Cards made me appear problematic. My partner used to follow an author a long time back, who tweeted about me being problematicâdespite having never interacted with me or admittedly read my stories. It was shocking to me that people were making assumptions of who I was as a person based on a story I created. I have never created stories with the aims of hurting or upsetting others. I am a very quiet and private person, and I hate the idea of hurting others. It was strange to me that people could assume me to be this cruel or even dangerous individual, intent on hurting others, because I created a fictional story. Do they think the same of script writers for television shows? Or film directors, who create films with dark subject matter? Do they think published authors are problematic people for writing dark and disturbing content? Do they think certain genres should not exist because they do not personally like them?
I do think it is strange that fan fiction writers are placed on these ridiculously high pedestals of moral absolutism. Fan fiction was created to be a space for creative outlet for marginalised individuals, particularly queer individuals. The heavy censorship of dark and unusual content is putting this entire ethos at danger. I understand not wanting to have certain topics included in stories because there is a risk that the content can be used for grooming or can be presented in a way that can negatively affect young consumers' perceptions (like pedophilia for example.) I certainly agree that there needs to be boundaries in place to stop the community from being flooded with such illegal content. But I think there is a difference between wanting to remove dangerous content, and wanting to get rid of content you do not like. Content can be problematic to you, but that does not make it dangerous, illegal, or bad. For some readers, the content they create is their way of dealing with trauma. Maybe this is not healthy for them. But that is their decision to make, not yours.
I orphaned the story because I did not want to handle the potential backlash. To put it simply, I do not handle negative criticism well. Not because I am stuck-up and think I am perfect, but because I am a very anxious person. Just reading angry comments makes me feel very uncomfortable, often nauseous. I know that House of Cards has received overwhelmingly positive feedback from readers, and for that I am thankful. But I had to distance myself for the sake of my own mental health. Since orphaning it, it exploded in popularity. I am thankful that I orphaned it because that amount of attention would frighten me a lot, haha~
What was your reaction to the fanfiction trailer by Sappiamur?
How did you come to the decision to reveal your real name in the end note of House of Cards?
How did you feel when you finished House of Cards?
How did you come to the decision to orphan House of Cards?
Did you ever anticipate the overwhelming fan reaction to House of Cards?
How do you feel knowing that House of Cards is one of the most read fanfictions on Ao3?
What do you want House of Cards to be remembered for?
What do you hope people take away from House of Cards?
Why do you think House of Cards became so popular?
I had to go back and watch it. It's been some time since I last have, and I'm still as amazed by it now as I was back then. The trailer is insane. I cannot imagine how much work went into making it. It's so good and it fits the vibes of the story to perfection. I think the first time I watched it, I was in shock. I must have repeated it at least 10 times in a row, just to make sure it was real and I wasn't imagining it. Then I think I screamed about it on my social media accounts, haha~ If you reading this have not watched the trailer, consider doing so. I promise you won't be disappointed.
Back when I first started posting fanfics, I used to get a lot of asks wanting to know my name, my pronouns, stuff like that. I thought by adding my name at the end of the stories, it would help cut down on these requests. But I also did so because I used to get a lot of asks referring to me as 'author-nim' and I didn't like being addressed by this honorific. I'm not Korean so I have no right to receive that honorific. So, I included my real name so readers could address me with it when sending me asks and interacting with me. I don't add my name at the end of my stories now, but my name is in my Twitter bio for those that want to know.
When I finished it, I felt relieved! I was so calm in the moment! Looking back on it, I can't remember much. But I do remember finishing House of Cards without any issues. The final chapters flowed smoothly, it all clicked into place, and I had a great time writing them.
I came to the decision to orphan the story after several nights of contemplation. I was considering deleting the story, along with a few others, but my partner and some friends told me I shouldn't do so. They suggested orphaning it instead. So, I did so. I didn't want to delete it in case readers that had started it had not gotten to finish it yet. I would've felt very mean robbing them of the opportunity to finish the story like that. I don't regret orphaning it instead of deleting it. I didn't want to destroy the story, I just needed some distance between me and the story.
I didn't anticipate it, and I still don't understand it! I'm shocked that House of Cards got the reaction that it received. Do I think it's a good story? Yes, I think that I worked hard to create a story that is enjoyable to read. But did I ever think it would get the reaction it did? Not in a million years! I thought that it would be one of my more popular stories because a) the pairings and b) the content. Gang stories usually tend to get a lot of attention because it's a popular genre in fanfiction. I just didn't expect it to reach such a vast amount of hits, kudos and comments.
I'm in shock that it is one of the most read stories on AO3. I don't think I will ever be able to create another story that will garner that kind of attention and feedback. It's a once in a lifetime thing, so I'm immensely proud of myself for achieving such a feat. But really, it's all because of the readers that it achieved such a goal. I'm so thankful for every single one of them.
I just want it to be remembered for being enjoyable, I think. I don't have any grand and lofty ambitions for the story. I think so long as the readers enjoyed it, that is all that matters.
I'm not sure what I would like readers to take away from House of Cards. I guess I want them to reflect on the idea of morality and that not everything is black-and-white. Good people can do bad things, and bad things can happen to good people. It's hard to answer this question because House of Cards isn't a story that I consider to have deep messages in it? There are no messages about acceptance and love and healthy relationships and such, like some of my other stories.
Honestly? I don't know what made it get so popular. I assume it's because of the pairings or the setting of the story. I know that a lot of readers say they love the story because of how well it's written, but I can't comment on that as the creator, haha~ I can't say my story is well-written as I'm not consuming it from an outside perspective. What I can say is that I do think I created a story that has a lot of twists and turns and betrayals, which I think adds to the enjoyment factor.
How are you now in 2020? Are you writing professionally in real life at all?Â
How do you feel BTS fanfiction has changed over time? Since youâve been writing for it for so long.Â
Do you have any messages for people who may read this interview in the future?
I'm not writing professionally. I have self-published two books via Amazon and Lulu. One was a basic re-branding of my story babes in the woods. The other was a total rewrite of Brotherhood, which I called 'Brothers,' featuring a whole new setting and roster of characters. I published them as readers showed an interest in reading original stories. I have been considering rewriting House of Cards as an original work in the future, but I can't say for certain that I will do so.
Since I started writing, I think there's been a lot of changes in the fandomânot only in fanfiction but in general. There's been popular trends that have come and gone (I was around for the explosion of social media and text-based AUs, which I personally am not a fan of) but there's also been a lot of push for more inclusive content. I'm really happy by the amount of inclusive content that I see these days. Despite some pushback from non-queer fans that sometimes have an issue with queer subject matter (for example, trans characters) I think it's wonderful that artists of all colours, genders and sexualities are now proudly creating content they want to see, and not simply just what is 'in demand' from the fandom.
The message that I would like to share with readers of this interview is: stay healthy, stay happy, and most importantly, stay you. I also want to take this moment to tell them this - if you are considering becoming a creator, but you are worried about reception to your work, or that it might not be good enough, stop right now! Stop doubting yourself and just give it a shot! I was once like you, scared that my weird and niche interests and writing would be ignored or even mocked by the fandom because no one would like it. Had I not decided to take the plunge, my life would be so drastically different. I've made so many friends, fallen in love, and completely changed my life by creating fan content. It can be scary, but once you take the leap, you will find your feet coming down on solid earth without any danger.
Thank you for reading this interview. Further below are reminders and information about this interview and Charmseoulâs Fanlore project.
sugamins is still writing on her sugamins Archive of Our Own account today if you are looking for her works. Charmedseoul will not be sharing the authorâs social media or contact information.
This interview is a part of the Top 50 Most Hit BTS Archive of our Own Works Project by Charmedseoul. The project documents the works and authors of the top 50 most hit BTS works on Archive of Our Own. All work for this project is done through Fanlore, which is run by the Organization of Transformative Works. However, Charmedseoul herself is not associated with Fanlore or OTW directly. All information documented through this project is done with full transparency.
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This interview was conducted through email from September 23, 2020 to October 25th, 2020 with sugaminsâ consent and protections under Fanloreâs Identity Protection policies. Unauthorized reposting of this interview is forbidden. Quotation and screenshot share of this interview is allowed.
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Thank you for reading. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask and I will do my best to answer them.
Charmed Seoul. Fandom Historian based on Fanlore.com. Twitter. Tumblr.
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introducing . . MALI CHUSUK . CIS WOMAN . 21 YEARS OLD . HEALTH AND SPORTS SCIENCE MAJOR . GIRLS SOCCER TEAM CAPTAIN .
hello hello !! im so excited to be here ! my name is g , and u can find me on my musings blog @ pocmuzings if u ever want to hmu ! iâm 23 and in the aest timezone , so ill be on at pretty random hours between working my 9-5 ! iâm a cis woman , and use she / her pronouns . iâm a proud brown beautiful woman ( im indian ) ! if u would like my discord , feel free to ask ! iâm a horror movie enthusiast , and would d*e for any poc in the entire world . .Â
iâm currently trying to figure out where the heck my sidebar links have gone on this theme . . so pls Bear with me fkjnfnjkfj . ( help . . help . . theyâre in the theme preview idk what i did )Â
hereâs mali , sheâs a muse iâve always wanted to play but never been able to !
inspiration for her is mandy milkovich from shameless , rosa diaz from b99 , rebeca from elite , kiara from outer banks and viola from shes the man
mali was raised in a house filled with boys , and her father was quite strict and determined . her relationship with her father has never been very personal, but more so almost like a business deal , or like a coach and his studentÂ
mali was quite active as a child , and quite energetic . she was always running around and bouncing off walls - it drove her father wild because he could never make her sit still , whilst also trying to raise her older brothers at the same time
because of this , mali kinda took to her own devices . she was introduced to soccer at school , and that was her first love . she found herself playing it at every lunch break , or rolling the ball under the desk during class time . it helped with her jitterinessÂ
it took a year or two before her father realised that she was quite keen on soccer , and she was good at it - and he was overjoyed at the talent she had when it came to playing . she was a strong striker and attacker , but she was also quite aggressive and competitive on the field . she didnât really have much etiquette when it came to the game , and she would play dirty at times . this . . only made her father even happier . suddenly he went from barely noticing her , to being at every soccer practice and game she had . he bought her the best soccer cleats he could afford , and pushed for her to win every game and score as many goals as possible . he went from not being very invested in mali , as the only girl in the family ( he didnât know what to do with a girl ) , to being her number one fan
at first it was great . . but then . . her father got a little overbearing and controlling. if she didnât make a shot , she could feel his disappointment radiating from a mile away . if she allowed someone to trip or foul her , her father would berate her in the car for not having been more intuitive . her father pushed her to be more and more competitive and the best she could be . mali still thoroughly loved soccer , but she started to find it slightly draining .Â
whenever she had a second of time outside of studying , her father would be making her run drills or shoot goals in the backyard . she never really got a lot of time to be by herself or do stuff she wanted ( like just normal teenage girl stuff . . getting crushes on people , going to house parties , having her first beer . . )Â
mali has spent majority of her time either with her brothers and her father ( the entire house is pure chaos . messy . loud burping . video games . yelling across rooms to each other . thereâs constant noise at all hours of the day ) , or hanging out with her fellow soccer team players ( sometimes they got along with mali , sometimes they saw her as too much of a ball hog or taking the game â too seriously â ) . mali hasnât really had a chance to develop many friendships outside of this , and itâs beginning to really effect herÂ
mali has decided to take somewhat of a step back from soccer ( and the competitiveness of it ) , but sheâs also not telling her father about that . mali misses having FUN with playing , instead of seeing it as a sport and chore .
she also wants to have the full college experience . her entire first year was dedicated to soccer and getting used to college and living out of home for the first time . this new independency is fantastic , but mali has no idea what to do with it . she wants to live . really live . really get the full experience .
mali really wants to be more â feminine â . she wants to know how to do boss eyeliner , and wear pretty dresses with heels . at the moment , her wardrobe consists of baggy sweaters , ripped jeans , and a lot of sweatpants . she finds woman to be so so beautiful . . but looks at herself and sees a Gremlin . . oh to be a Woman . . wow . .Â
mali can be described as . . . very very blunt and loudmouthed . a bi disaster . chaotic and messy . competitive and driven , but also very blasĂ© and careless at times ( reckless may be a better word ) . sheâs very spontaneous , and always up for literally anything ( if u wanna get a burrito at 2am , mali will come . if you want to roadtrip across the state , mali will ride shotgun . she never says no )Â
mali is very sick of being seen as â one of the dudes â or â one of the guys â , she especially wants to be making more female friends and have more females in her life , because . . sheâs literally never had many that werenât on the soccer team with her , or her own competition !
connections ( but also pls i will fill any connection u WANT )
trainwreck meet trainwreck : give me two disaster bastards ! together they are absolute chaos ! they are very similair in that they are both abrasive and intense and very high energy . they usually will encourage each others bad behaviours or be somewhat of a bad influence to each otherÂ
â one of the boys â : give me a male friend who literally sees mali as another one of the guys . it irks mali sometimes and she has to remind them , hey . . im a girl too , and theyâre always like â yeah but ur not a GIRL girl â , and that lowkey grinds her gears . SHE WANTS TO BE A GIRL GIRL
soft females : please . . my god . . give me the softest sweetest gal to maliâs absolute demonic energy
soccer players : 100000% believe mali has challenged ur character to an impromptu game of soccer at one point . it doesnât matter if ur not in the same league or team as mali . if u play soccer for even one second , she will want to size u up and try Beat u at it .Â
childhood friends : i ainât never seen two pretty childhood friends . . no iâm kidding , but i do love childhood friends so SO much
ride or die : I LOVE RIDE OR DIES . GIVE ME TWO PEOPLE WHO WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR EACH OTHER AT ANY TIME . THEYâD DROP ENTIRE WORLDS FOR EACH OTHER
siblings but not by blood : they bicker , they rant , they get frustrated . . but they always always come back to each other . they can call each other an asshole then text each other ten mins later and be like â taco bell ? :) â dskjnfdnjk
watch it , bitch : mali is . . a Lot . sheâs very intense and loud , and she has no manners . sheâs very competitive and aggressive at times and i completely understand why that isnt everyones cup of tea ! lets get some negative connections up in here !
bi bi bi : give me hookups . past . present .emerging . future . let mali be a hoe , she deserves it . she deserves the college experience
party in the usa : whos gonna introduce mali to alcohol n partying and having a Wild As Heck night ?
outer banks : pls pls pls pls PLEASE give me an outer banks - esque squad . total idiots . absolute morons .. thereâs not a single brain cell between them . .Â
mali , you look like shit : please teach her how to not wear the same sweatshirt 10 days in a row . pls clean her up . pls show her how to be Pretty . make her over . . . i beg of u . .Â
older sister : honestly kinda like the above plot but iâd love for a Wise Woman to just . . be a mentor and guide to mali and be an amazing friend to herÂ
GIRL SQUAD : i literally love female friendships so muhc . . its smth that can be so personal . . but really my god . give me and mali a bunch of females in her life , shes never really had that before and she Deserves itÂ
pain in my ass : they both irritate each other endlessly . theyâre both too similair , maybe ,and thatâs why they clash . a lot of it is â harmless teasing â and â banter â for the most part , but they literally fight like an old married couple around each other .
#pyrrhic.intro#this is a wild ride its 2am i gotta be up for work in 5 hours#do i hate myself ? absolutely#anyways i adore u all#do i already wanna bring in more chars ? yes#will i try Restrain myself ? maybe .#i will get to starters and intros ASAP
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I'll openly admit I haven't read quite as much this year as I originally intended. This has been for a couple reasons, in part because I was flaring a lot at the beginning of the year and frequently found myself too exhausted to read (which is a thing, I learned), in part because I've been ridiculously busy and found myself with less reading time than usual, and in part because I also had an epic reading slump that really ate away at my reading motivation.Â
But that said! I've still read some really amazing books this year so far and I'd like to share my favorites until now. In no particular order:
History is All You Left Me by Adam Silvera
YA Contemporary
Goodreads summary:
"When Griffinâs first love and ex-boyfriend, Theo, dies in a drowning accident, his universe implodes. Even though Theo had moved to California for college and started seeing Jackson, Griffin never doubted Theo would come back to him when the time was right. But now, the future heâs been imagining for himself has gone far off course. To make things worse, the only person who truly understands his heartache is Jackson. But no matter how much they open up to each other, Griffinâs downward spiral continues. Heâs losing himself in his obsessive compulsions and destructive choices, and the secrets heâs been keeping are tearing him apart. If Griffin is ever to rebuild his future, he must first confront his history, every last heartbreaking piece in the puzzle of his life."
Why I liked it: This book is a heartbreaker, and boy did it make me feel things from start to finish. I wrote a review talking about History in depth, but the short version is this story is raw, impactful, and just really beautifully written.
The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzie Lee
YA Historical Fiction
Goodreads summary:
"Henry âMontyâ Montague was born and bred to be a gentleman, but he was never one to be tamed. The finest boarding schools in England and the constant disapproval of his father havenât been able to curb any of his roguish passionsânot for gambling halls, late nights spent with a bottle of spirits, or waking up in the arms of women or men. But as Monty embarks on his Grand Tour of Europe, his quest for a life filled with pleasure and vice is in danger of coming to an end. Not only does his father expect him to take over the familyâs estate upon his return, but Monty is also nursing an impossible crush on his best friend and traveling companion, Percy. Still it isnât in Montyâs nature to give up. Even with his younger sister, Felicity, in tow, he vows to make this yearlong escapade one last hedonistic hurrah and flirt with Percy from Paris to Rome. But when one of Montyâs reckless decisions turns their trip abroad into a harrowing manhunt that spans across Europe, it calls into question everything he knows, including his relationship with the boy he adores."
Why I liked it:Â I'm actually still reading this one, but I'm about 90% done and I've been loving every step of the journey. It's hilarious, compelling, and I'll be honest, seeing a major chronically ill character on the page has meant a lot to me. As a bonus, the protagonist, Monty, is very clearly bi from the first page so the book is super queer and super awesome.
Adulthood is a Myth and Big Mushy Happy Lump by Sarah Andersen
Graphic Novel
Goodreads summary:
"These casually drawn, perfectly on-point comics by the hugely popular young Brooklyn-based artist Sarah Andersen are for the rest of us. They document the wasting of entire beautiful weekends on the internet, the unbearable agony of holding hands on the street with a gorgeous guy, and dreaming all day of getting home and back into pajamas. In other words, the horrors and awkwardnesses of young modern life. Oh and they are totally not autobiographical. At all. Adulthood Is a Myth presents many fan favorites plus dozens of all-new comics exclusive to this book. Like the work of fellow Millennial authors Allie Brosh, Grace Helbig, and Gemma Correll, Sarah's frankness on personal issues like body image, self-consciousness, introversion, relationships, and the frequency of bra-washing makes her comics highly relatable and deeply hilarious."
Why I liked it:Â I'm lumping these together because they're both very quick reads and relatedâbut I loved these graphic novels so much. They're incredibly funny to begin with, and also super relatable, full of sketches about anxiety, stumbling through adulthood, and relationships. I definitely recommend them both for a quick read that'll make you laugh.
The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas
YA Contemporary
Goodreads summary:
"Sixteen-year-old Starr Carter moves between two worlds: the poor neighborhood where she lives and the fancy suburban prep school she attends. The uneasy balance between these worlds is shattered when Starr witnesses the fatal shooting of her childhood best friend Khalil at the hands of a police officer. Khalil was unarmed. Soon afterward, his death is a national headline. Some are calling him a thug, maybe even a drug dealer and a gangbanger. Protesters are taking to the streets in Khalil's name. Some cops and the local drug lord try to intimidate Starr and her family. What everyone wants to know is: what really went down that night? And the only person alive who can answer that is Starr. But what Starr does or does not say could upend her community. It could also endanger her life."
Why I liked it: I obviously couldn't do a first half of 2017 book post without including THUG. I already reviewed this book and talked about why I felt it's so excellent and poignant, but the short version is the voice and story are both incredibly compelling and I truly believe it deserves every ounce of buzz it's gotten so far.
Scratch: Writers, Money, and the Art of Making a Living by Majula Martin
Writing Reference
Goodreads summary:
"A collection of essays from todayâs most acclaimed authorsâfrom Cheryl Strayed to Roxane Gay to Jennifer Weiner, Alexander Chee, Nick Hornby, and Jonathan Franzenâon the realities of making a living in the writing world. In the literary world, the debate around writing and commerce often begs us to take sides: either writers should be paid for everything they do or writers should just pay their dues and count themselves lucky to be published. You should never quit your day job, but your ultimate goal should be to quit your day job. Itâs an endless, confusing, and often controversial conversation that, despite our bare-it-all culture, still remains taboo. In Scratch, Manjula Martin has gathered interviews and essays from established and rising authors to confront the age-old question: how do creative people make money? As contributors including Jonathan Franzen, Cheryl Strayed, Roxane Gay, Nick Hornby, Susan Orlean, Alexander Chee, Daniel Jose Older, Jennifer Weiner, and Yiyun Li candidly and emotionally discuss money, MFA programs, teaching fellowships, finally getting published, and what success really means to them, Scratch honestly addresses the tensions between writing and money, work and life, literature and commerce. The result is an entertaining and inspiring book that helps readers and writers understand what itâs really like to make art in a world that runs on moneyâand why it matters. Essential reading for aspiring and experienced writers, and for anyone interested in the future of literature, Scratch is the perfect bookshelf companion to On Writing, Never Can Say Goodbye, and MFA vs. NYC."
Why I liked it: Unsurprisingly, I wrote a review for this one too, so if you want in-depth details you can check that out. But the brief version is I largely found this book eye-opening, honest, and encouraging (though some who read it found it depressing, so YMMV).
So those cover my top five favorite reads so far. What are yours?
#reading#books#2017#reader#Writability#SCRATCH#HISTORY IS ALL YOU LEFT ME#THE HATE U GIVE#THE GENTLEMAN'S GUIDE TO VICE AND VIRTUE#ADULTHOOD IS A MYTH#BIG MUSHY HAPPY LUMP
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Template credit goes to @trashwarden
So Iâve been playing a lot of Dragon Age recently, found this relationship template thing and thought Iâd give a go at it. Lines extending from the player character are their feelings towards the other character, lines extending from other characters are their feelings towards the PC (with a gradient where the colours meet). Descriptions of each chart under the cut.
Warden Dribnif Aeducan was a fun piece of work. A total asshole, but he was fun to play, definitely my favourite playthrough of DA:O. Dude was an avid non-believer in magic, despite falling into a relationship with Morrigan, and nothing--absolutely nothing--could convince him it was real. âSheâs not using magic,â he would say to Alistair. âSheâs just flashing some pretty sparkles that distract the enemies long enough for me to plug them with arrows.â âWhat? Then whatâs she making the sparkles with, if not magic?â Alistair would reply. Dribnif would shrug. âSome kind of glowing mushrooms made into a poultice or something. Trust me, I know my glowing mushrooms. Iâm a dwarf, you know.â âYes, I can see that, but...how do you explain her transforming into a spider? Thatâs clearly magic.â âIt is not. Morrigan just throws a big black woollen cloak over herself and sticks some black tree branches out from under it. I dunno, she seems to enjoy it, and our enemies seem to be dumb enough to fall for it, so I let her have her fun.â
I noticed that with a lot of these templates Iâve seen filled out, thereâs a lot of green lines or yellow, very few purple or grey, and Iâve never seen one with a black line (save for maybe one towards Loghain that Iâve forgotten about). Not with Dribnif Aeducan. He was a very polarizing PC. He had strong opinions and he would not hesitate to let you know them.Â
Alistair and him were on good terms for most of the game, but all of Alistairâs friendliness towards him was vaporized by Dribnifâs decision to induct Loghain into the Grey Wardens. Dribnif wanted to remain on good terms, but Alistair never forgave his former friend.Â
Dribnif himself never forgave Wynne for her constant nagging and berating him for his love for Morrigan, though she wasnât quite as vehemently rude to him back.Â
Oghren and Dribnif were thick as thieves. Both being dwarves, they found common ground complaining about Orzammar and drinking.Â
Leliana didnât appreciate Dribnif claiming her Maker didnât exist (Dribnif thought religion was stupid in general--why worry about some kind of gods or ancestors or whoever having a hand in things when events are happening and affecting people right now?), and Dribnif didnât appreciate her attempts to usurp him as the partyâs archer.
Dribnif was thrilled to have a qunari on his side smashing heads in, and Sten appreciated Dribnifâs bluntness and pragmatism.
Loghain felt to Dribnif like a stopgap replacement for Alistair, but he came to genuinely respect the man, and actually ended up considering him more of a friend than he ever considered Alistair to be, to the surprise of all involved.
Loghainâs daughter Anora, on the other hand, rubbed Dribnif the wrong way from day 1. Maybe it was her odd speaking style that always made it seem like she was trying to hide something, maybe it was her inherent ties to the man that Dribnif at the time considered his biggest enemy...whatever it was, Dribnif decided he couldnât trust her on the throne and cooked up a plan to get the countryâs ruler in his pocket. His plan got Alistair a wife and a kingdom and got himself a top-tier general and veteran fighter in addition to his friend on the throne...but for some dumb reason Alistair didnât seem very appreciative, meaning most of Dribnifâs work was pointless. Jerk.
Dribnif gushed about having Shale under his control for at least a full month after activating her. âI HAVE A GOLEM YOU GUYS THIS IS AWESOME.â Shale, for her part, tolerated him, but eventually came to respect the squishy short man.
Dribnif never liked elves in general, but saw promise in Zevran as a hostage he could possibly use to blackmail the Antivan Crows. Unfortunately for him, the plot backfired when Zevran swore loyalty to him before demands could be made. (Probably for the best, honestly.) Dribnif never forgave Zevran for a) being an elf and b) trying to kill him. He also couldnât believe that Zevran couldnât even open a simple locked box.
Dribnif always had a thing for tall women. The revealing outfit probably helped too.
DOG. DRIBNIF LOVE DOG. DOGâS NAME WAS WESTLETON AND HE WAS GOOD DOG.
Bonus Dribnif chart:
Nathaniel was a decent enough guy, and as a fellow archer he and Dribnif traded archery tips. (Bows were so good in Awakening that I often brought Nathaniel despite the weapon usage overlap.)
Dribnif was faithful to Morrigan, but if they hadnât been together he probably would have made a move on Sigrun. A cheerful, stabby dwarf whoâs a member of the Legion of the Dead? Sold.
Oghren and Dribnif were always pals, but Dribnif helping him out with his family troubles really solidified things.
Anders was a swell guy. Dribnif was more of a dog person than a cat person, though.
Justice is one of my personal favourite companions. Dribnif liked him too. Justice does not understand this thing you call âfriendshipâ. What a guy.
Who is Velanna again? Sheâs the aggressive mage girl right? Bah. Elves. Dribnif was not a fan.
Champion Bongo Hawke has one of my favourite designs Iâve ever made for a character (and I was disappointed I couldnât get him looking just right when he came back in Inquisition). He was a snarky bastard and supported the mage rebellion, though he had to kill Anders because what the fuck, guy. His unusual name was the result of me wondering âwhy would everybody only ever refer to him as Hawke, even his own blood relatives?â
Carver:Â âIâm not calling you that, no matter how you plead.â Hawke:Â âCome on, brother, donât be like that. You know as well as I do this is the name that father wanted for me. You canât keep calling me Hawke when weâre both named Hawke.â Carver: âDonât care. Still not going to do it.â Hawke: âItâs a fine name! Itâs our great-grandfatherâs name!â Carver:Â âGreat-Grandfather was insane! He stabbed fruits and furniture out of fear they were getting ready to steal his ears!â Hawke:Â âBut he and father was very close, so father wanted me to have his name in his memory.â Carver:Â âHis name was Matthias! He only starting referring to himself as Bongo after father was born! Bongo Bongongus, drum-lord of Southern Ferelden!â Hawke:Â â...I like that name. Maybe I should get everyone to call me Bongongus instead?â Carver:Â âNOâ
Anyway, relationships.
Bethany was a nice girl and Hawke loved his little sister but she died.
Carver and Hawke didnât see eye to eye for the longest of times, but eventually, after Carver returned from the Grey Wardens and got over his emo teen phase, their brotherly bond deepened.
Hawke was willing to overlook Merrillâs whole âblood magicâ thing because...fuck, man. Sheâs really cute. Her accent is adorable.
Varric is the absolute best friend a guy like Hawke could ask for. Especially considering Hawke was very snarky. They had great banter.
Hawke and Tallis always had a rocky relationship, but the reveal that she was qunari put him over the edge. Bongoâs not a fan of qunari, after the whole trying-to-destroy/enslave-Kirkwall incident.
Hawke was ok with Anders, but he was very wary of the whole âJustice/Vengeanceâ thing and the fact that Anders never shut up about mage opression. Maybe it was because he grew up as an apostate and hadnât witnessed the horrors of the Circles firsthand, only heard about them, but Hawke felt that Anders could stand to lighten the hell up a bit, at least once in a while. And then Anders went and started the Mage-Templar War. Hawke was forced to execute him. Fun!
Hawkeâs uncle is a DICK and no one likes him
Isabela was cool, but she skipped town during the whole qunari thing and never came back. Rude.
Aveline was Tank-Mom. Hawke relished in getting her and Donnic together and brought her on pretty much every outing. (Aveline is rad u guys)
Fenris. Ah yes, the Western JRPG Protagonist. He was a dick because Hawke was a mage. Hawke didnât much care for his dicketry. They did not get along.
Sebastian respected Hawke, but Hawke thought the guy needed to put a damn sock in it. OK. YES. PIOUSNESS AND STUFF. SHUT UP ABOUT THE FUCKING CHANTRY.
Inquisitor Verganon Lavellan was a good, polite man who went to elf-church and did his homework and ate his vegetables. He also drank from the Well of Sorrows, because screw you Morrigan I know more about this shit than you do, I am an elf mage
Coleâs a good kid. Like most of the companions (and players), Verganon took him under his wing, and encouraged him to be more human. Kid got a girlfriend out of it, so...Iâm calling this a win.
Verganon thought Leliana did her job well enough, so he left her alone and didnât try to soften her up. Why would we want our spymaster to be a big softie, anyway? Itâs not like he knew her back when she was fun and actually went on adventures with the PC, though (as you can see above regarding Dribnif and Lelianaâs relationship) she didnât go on many.
Cassandra and Verganon had a strictly business oriented relationship. They went out, killed things, came back, said goodbye, and went about their business. (I mean, I still did her personal quest, but...)
Dorianâs a mage. Verganonâs a mage. MAGE BUDDIES.
Apparently Verganon was too elfy for Sera. Shove it up your quiver, jerkwad. Mythal does exist, and so does Fenâharel, so presumably the other elven gods do too. I WAS RIIIIGHT
Vivienne was far too hypocritical for Verganonâs tastes. Ok, so you want to reinstate the circles, fine...but would you want to spend your days cooped up in a tower taking orders from templars? No, not a chance? And there you have it. We at least shared a specialization so we could run into battle with our lightsabers carving shit up.
I AM DRINKING FROM THE FUCKING WELL OF SORROWS MORRIGAN OUT OF MY WAY S L U R P
Blackwall started off being someone Verganon wasnât sure about, but as time went on his snarky nature and genuinely good heart won him over. (Also I really like his personal quest.) Although heâd never admit it, Verganon always did harbour a small crush for Blackwall...âs beard. Itâs so majestic. HOW DID HE GROW IT HIMSELF, IT HAD TO HAVE BEEN BESTOWED UPON HIM BY THE GODS. ELVES CANâT GROW BEARDS SO JEALOUS
Continuing on Hawkeâs trend of people making friends with Varric...Verganon made great friends with Varric. Love that dude.
Iron Bull and Verganon killed a dragon together. After you do that with somebody youâre kind of automatically best friends. Then they went drinking and Verganon got fucking trashed
Cullenâs aight. Dig the collar.
Josephineâs politeness matched Verganonâs nicely, and he couldnât get enough of the way she blushed whenever he gave her a compliment. Before long he was head-over-heels for her and somehow wound up in Val Royeaux trying to stab a man for her affections.
...Goddammit, now I want to go replay the series again. Iâll be back once Iâve completed all three games again.
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