#Bury My Heart at Wonded Knee

[jolieeason]

October 2024 Wrap-Up

Here is what I read, posted, won, received, and bought in October. Let me know if you have read any of these books and what you thought of them. Books I Read: Books from indie authors/publishers: Books I bought: If the Duke Dares by Darcy Burke Vacancy by Linda Kage Playing High by Beth Pellino-Dudzic Tentacles and Teeth by Ariele Sieling The Moving House by Duncan Ralston The Magpie…

[julessworldd]

Little Rose

Chapter 4

warnings: cussing, physical fighting(mention of it), its guns so alochol, drugs, sex, fighting. 

A/N: To the mutals, who helped with being groupies. I do degrade you in this, drag your character through the mud. I didn’t make it to make fun of you or anything striclty for the plot. I love you wondeful babies! @reigns420​ as Michelle @marteolus24​ as Evelyn, @slashscowboyboots​ as Karen(I forgot to ask my bad) Hope you guys enjoy! Sorry for the late upate <3

Groupies never bother me too bad, unless I needed one of the boys and they were balls deep in a groupie, who had been with Van Halen to Motley Crue. They were a part of the rock n’ roll scene along with booze, drugs, traveling the world.  I never saw the hype in them, to me they were just cheap easy girls, who had issues that needed male validation to cope with life’s fucked up ways.  The boys’ groupies have never liked me or wanted to believe that I was Axl’s sister and the band’s assistant. I’ve had one call me a whore for kissing Axl’s cheek before a show one night. Greffen wasn’t too happy to hear, Guns N’ Roses’ assistant sent a girl to the E.R with a concussion, two broken ribs, a busted nose and chin. 

“Hey Princess”, Duff pulled into his chest from behind. 

“Hi Handsome, how was sound check?”, I turned around and had my arms around his neck. “Good, I missed you though”, Duff ran his hand over my rib cage. “I missed you too, Dork”, I kissed his chest, feeling his warmth and sweat. “Come on”, He grabbed my hand. Duff was dragging me like a child to his dressing room. “Duff, slow down”, I giggled. Duff suddenly stopped in his tracks.  “Duff, what’s wrong?”, I asked.  “Oh hey, Duff”, I heard a female voice. “Uh hi”, Duff swallowed. I looked passed him and sure enough it was a groupie.  “Wanna go into a storage closet and have some fun?”, She walked up to Duff and ran her hand down his chest. My blood was boiling and I saw red.  “Uh what is she doing here?”, Michelle snarled her nose.  “Yeah, Duff what am I doing here with you?”, I asked. Duff stayed silent and still. Michelle smirked and pulled Duff by his hair, “I think I hear Izzy hollering for me, see ya around Duff”, I turned around and walked down the hall.  Normally, I would have pounced a groupie for being that rude to me, but Duff hasn’t come out and said he’s off the market. “Hey Janie, I thought you were with Duff?”, Axl asked.  “Oh yeah, he was tired and fell asleep”, I lied. Axl nodded, “I’m gonna call Erin, anything you want me to tell or ask her?”  “No, just tell her I love her and peanut”, I smiled. Axl walked down the hall to his room. “What now?”, Izzy asked, leaning on a wall, lighting a cigarette. “Nothing”, I rolled my eyes.

“There’s something, your eyes are darker”, Izzy said. “Just a groupie is all. Why the hell can’t they figure out when guys are taken? Mhm? Hell that probably doesn't occur to them”, I said.  “Who was it?”, Izzy asked. “Michelle, I think. Her and Duff definitely had something more than wham bam, thank you ma'am. He didn’t do anything to get her to quit, let her rub up on him and his chest. While I was standing right behind, he didn’t tell her to quit because he has a girlfriend.”, I said sinking to the ground, pulling my knees to my chest. “I’m sorry kid. Duff probably froze, like a deer in headlights”, Izzy said, sitting next to me. “He didn’t say or do anything when I told him I thought I heard you hollering for me. Wonder what he’s doing with that-”, I clenched my fist, anger boiling within me more. “Go find him, kid. Kick his ass but not too bad we got a show”, Izzy moved hair away from my face. “I’m like Axl, I have blind anger. I'll kill him if I don’t get pulled off of him. Remember that girl I sent to the hospital last year. It took Axl, Duff, a security guard to get me off of her. I tried fighting the security dude too.”, I breathed out. Izzy knew how Axl and I are wired, I can actually bite back unlike Axl who just barks half of the time. “True, just go talk to him, set ground rules. I love Duff, but you’re the little sister I never wanted but will kill for you”, Izzy held my hand, smiling at me. “Thanks Izzy, love you”, I kissed his cheek, before getting up again.

I bounced down the hall, like Popcorn does. “Hey Janie, guess what?”, Axl grabbed my hand, making me stop. “Yeah Ax?”, I turned to him, he had a smile the size of Texas.  “I’m having a daughter”, He almost had tears in his eyes. A Niece, a princess like I knew at the airport. “That’s amazing, I’m so happy for you two. We were right”, I laughed, trying to not to cry. “I know, can’t believe I’m gonna have a daughter. What if she doesn't like me?”, Axl had pulled me into a hug. “You’re gonna be an amazing dad, Axl. I promise you that, you’re not gonna be like him. You’ve pretty much raised and protected me for years and I’ve turned out good. Oh I love you too”, I squeezed him tightly. “Thanks kid, love you too”, Axl smiled. 

I knocked on Duff’s door, he opened it. He had tears streaming down his face, his face was blotchy and pink. “Hey, what’s the matter?”, I asked. “I’m sorry, Janie”, He said. “For what?”, I asked softly. “For not telling Michelle that I’m with you. You probably thought I cheated, I didn’t. I love you and never want to lose you. I told her and that I wanted her to let the others know what Duff McKagan is happily with Axl’s little sister”, Duff pulled into his bare chest. I saw lipstick marks on his pecs, collarbone.  “Duff, it’s okay. I’m sorry leaving you, I was just taking myself away before I pounced on her. I love you. Did she try kissing you?”, I rubbed his chest where salmon color lipstick stained.  “Yeah, I pushed her away. Probably too hard for a girl, but it just happened that way”, Duff said. “I believe you, Duffy. She would have a busted face from me so your pushing was okay. I think she got the point after you freaked out on here”, I laughed. Truthfully, I’m not sure what Michelle would have got from me. Duff wasn’t  gonna be wrapped in a red ribbon with a bow on his head, at her doorstep that’s for sure.  “Oh I gotta tell you something”, I smiled up at him. “What’s that, Princess?”, Duff asked. “Axl is a father to a baby girl, we’re right”, I giggled. “Holy shit, that’s amazing”, Duff kissed my forehead. “I know! I’ve already bought a sleeper when we were in Manchester. It has a pink elephant with a purple bow”, I gushed. Duff was just staring at me with adoration and a smile on his face. “I just hope she doesn't have her dad’s red hair”, Duff smirked.  “I have red hair, what’s wrong with red?”, I whined, my heart felt like it was stabbed. “Nothing, just aggravating Axl is all. I love your red hair, love running my fingers through, I like it when I wake up and it’s in my face.”, Duff grinned, kissing me. “Fuck you, bottle blonde”, I stabbed back. “Mines dirty blonde naturally, baby”, Duff smirked. 

We finally finished the European leg and were back in the U.S, the American leg was always easy and fun.  “Baby? Wake up”, I heard Duff whisper into my ear. “Mhm”, I groaned. “Oh I woke you, my bad. Go back to bed”, Duff said. “No what do you want?”, I asked, yawning. He didn’t say anything, I felt his tent on my thigh. “Really Duff it’s 4am?”, I groaned. “I’m sorry, he has a mind of his own. Not my fault you’re so damn gorgeous”, He whined. “If I give you head, will you leave me alone so I can sleep?”, I asked, rolling over to face him. Duff nodded, but he raised his hand a little. “What is it, Duffy?”, I sighed. “Actually, I wanted to give you head?”, He blushed a little. “Oh”, I laughed. “Same thing, will you let me sleep?”, I asked. He nodded his head furiously,  “Better make worth your while, bub. Waking me up, when I was sleeping so-”, I said, but he attacked my core. “Mhm fuck Duff”, I whined. “You said to make it worth my while”, Duff said as he entered two fingers in me. I pushed his head back, “Don’t talk”, he continued eating me out. Soon enough, Duff triggered my high and I whined and pulled his hair. Duff came up and rubbed his head, “I’m not a girl who you’re curb stomping, damn.”  “I’m sorry Duff, I’ll make it up to you”, I kissed him. “Really?”, Duff smirked. “You gotta let me sleep for a good while, okay?”, I said fluffing my pillow more. “Fine”, he whined. “Go to sleep, Duff. It’s almost five am”, I said. “But, I still have a problem”, Duff pointed to his crotch.  “Alright fine you broke me. If any injuries occur don’t sue me”, I sighed, crawling to him.  “Sue you? Baby, you don’t get paid enough”, Duff smirked. “You’re burying yourself deeper, boy”, I gave him a go to hell look. After giving Duff a sloppy/sleepy head he finally let me sleep. 

“If you touch me besides a cuddling position. Think of me as  the Berlin Wall, you’ll know what barbed wire feels like between your legs”, I looked at him.  He nodded and he was out like a light. 

Izzy was known for being quiet and a part of the shadows,which was cool the majority of the time. Only if we weren’t on tour and Duff and him had an interview and he needed to be ready in five minutes. “Hey Slash, have you seen Izzy?”, I asked the curly guitarist, who was strumming his guitar. “Uhh, I think he went off with a groupie. She was blonde, sorta small, kinda like you”, Slash grinned. “He doesn't have time to rail a chick right now. Fuck, you guys really stress me the fuck out at times.”, I pinched my nose. “Sorry, Janie. I think he took her to his room”, Slash gave a tiny smile. “Thank you, Slash. See ya around”, I gave him a hug. “See ya kid, be safe”, Slash said. “I’m older than you,'' I said, opening his door. “And I’m taller”, Slash laughed. “I hope your string pops”, I smirked. Duff was standing outside our room, “Hey Gorgeous” “Not now! Are you ready? If you’re not, I’m gonna kill you with your bass”, I said. “Yeah, waiting on you and Iz”, Duff said. “Apparently, he’s balls deep into a blonde chick. Like I know exactly who he’s fucking Slash”, I rolled my eyes. Duff was gonna say something when we heard a huge pornographic female moan along with Izzy’s name. “He’s finished now”, Duff smirked.  We leaned against the wall next to his door, “See ya around Iz”, the door opened and revealed the groupie or random chick. She blushed seeing Duff. I gotta keep him a shorter leash. 

“Jeffery Dean! Get your ass ready now, before I cut your head off”, I yelled standing outside his door.  “I’m dressed, Janet! Anything else you wanna bitch at me for?”, Izzy yelled. “No”, I said sad and my lip started quivering. Izzy and Axl are the two people I hate to be yelled at from, Izzy could be brutal especially if he was coming down from smack. 

I stayed in the green room as the boys were being interviewed by Kurt Loader.  Izzy hasn’t yelled at me like that since my ex, Ashton, cheated on me twice. I know Izzy wasn’t exactly yelling towards me, but he was being loud and it reminded me of being back in Lafayette. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“God, Janie he done it twice for fuck sakes. When are you gonna see he’s a piece of shit and you deserve better!”, Izzy yelled. 

“Izzy, leave her the fuck alone. She’s upset”, Pamela rubbed my back. 

“She’s fine, Pam. Leave her alone, she needs to be bitched at. Axl’s out fucking whoever, so it’s my job to-”, Izzy stopped in mid sentence as I smacked his face. The room was silent, Pamela’s mouth hung open, Izzy held his jaw and cheek.  “Fuck you, Jeff!”, I slammed the door and ran down the stairs to my car.  “Janie?”, I looked up to see Duff standing with a case of Budwiser.  “You okay? Did you and Axl fight again?”, he asked calmly.  “No, Izzy and I did. Ashton cheated on me again and Izzy lost his shit over it. Pamela told him to lay off, but he didn’t. He made me so fucking mad that I uh smacked him across his face. I just ran down here. Are you here to hang out with Izzy?”I said while trying to hold my tears. 

“I was, but screw him. Wanna drive around for a while and finish the case?” Duff asked in a soft voice. Duff and I were kinda close but Axl told us no funny shit. “Sure. Your car or mine?”, I asked. “Come on”, Duff held his hand out for me. I was hesitant to take it. What  if Izzy or Pamela were looking down. “Come on, I won’t bite”, Duff grinned. I took his hand and he led the way to his car.  We drank the whole case and made out in the backseat.  “Ashton was an ass to you, I hated seeing the way he treated you”, Duff admitted. “Why? He was just a dude, who I was too blind to see he’s shit. Izzy is right”, I sighed. “I mean yeah Izzy had a point. I care because I hate seeing girls being treated like shit. I would kill  a guy from treating my sisters like he did you. You’re an amazing woman, Janie. You’re sweet, protective, loving, got the prettiest smile ever. Any guy would be lucky to have and would be a fool to lose you.”, Duff said. “Thanks Duff. You’re not so bad yourself. Too bad Ax told us no funny shit”, I said. “You always listen to your brother? You’re 22, Janie”, Duff asked. I climbed into his lap and kissed him. 

That was the first time we fucked and led to where we are now. Ironically, I pissed Izzy off and Duff is being his sweetheart self, mending the pieces back between us.  The door opened, I looked over. It was Izzy. “Here to yell at me more cause you didn’t get enough smack this morning?”, I sassed. “Janie, I’m sorry. I didn’t sleep last night, Karen wouldn’t get off of me”, Izzy defended himself. “I don’t care. Where’s Duff?”, I asked. I wasn’t ready to accept his apology and hug him again. “Outside the door”, Izzy mumbled. I passed him and went to find Duff. Duff was getting ready to lit a cigarette, a stick was perched between his teeth as he rummaged to find a lighter. I brought my lighter to him. “Thanks, gorgeous”, Duff smiled as he blew out smoke. I forced myself into his arms and laid my head on his chest. “What’s wrong, baby?”, Duff wrapped an arm around my back.  “I just need to be held for a bit”, I mumbled. “I can do that, Janie”, Duff whispered, bringing me closer to him. 

It was getting close to showtime, each boy was in their dressing room doing whatever pre show ritual, finishing a quick nap. “What happened between you and Iz?”, Axl asked, combing his hair. “Just him coming down, you know how he is if you tell him what to do. Plus he was with a groupie.”, I said. “Who was it?”, Axl asked. “What the fuck does it matter? You’re married and have a kid on the way”, I scoffed.  “You’re right. I’m sorry he yelled at you. I can kick his ass for you”, Axl pulled me into a hug. “I love you, but Izzy would put up a good fight. He’s scrappy”, I giggled. “Hey there’s that laugh”, Axl grinned, ruffling my hair. “Have a good show, Ax. I’m gonna go find Duff. Love you”, I said, kissing his cheek. “Thanks, kid. Love you too”, Axl rubbed my shoulder. Duff’s door was cracked, weird. Maybe he got hot or a roadie forgot to shut it back. I opened the door, a girl was in his room but no sign of him. “Uh who are you?”She asked. “His girlfriend, who the hell are you and why are you in here?”, I asked, feeling my blood pressure rising.  “Evelyn, I always come see him when he’s in town.”, Evelyn flipped her black hair back.  “Listen here you green-eyed sex kitten, Duff isn’t single anymore. So you get your horny ass up and tell all the other whores that Duff McKagan isn’t available for you to have fun. I’m sure you can find one of the guys to fuck in a storage closet”, I said. “I’m not leaving until I hear Duff say he’s with you”, Evelyn rolled her eyes. “Not a chance, sweetness. You’re leaving now without a scratch or you’re leaving in an ambulance. Your choice, Evie”, I smirked. “I’m not leaving until I hear Duf-”, She was cut off. “Evelyn, I would get up and leave if I was you and had some sense”, Duff said. “You’re not seriously with this rude bitch? Duff what about what we had?”, She whined. “I am, I appreciate you if I would stop being rude to my girl, I asked you to leave”, Duff said, standing behind me. Evelyn huffed and walked out. “I’m sorry that they don’t listen and are rude to you. I just forgot to tell them”, Duff said, bringing my hand to his chest. “That’s not gonna work if you don’t tell the press you’re not single anymore”, I pouted. “I did today, Kurt asked if Izzy and I were single or not? It was a fan question”, Duff said. “Really?”, I blushed. “Sure did. Said how much I love you and how you make me feel safe, like I’m home”, Duff said.

I smiled, “That’s how I feel about you. You’ve always made me feel safe” 

“I’m glad I have, you’re so damn pretty”, Duff smiled. “5 minutes”, a roadie said. “Good luck”, I kissed his cheek. “Thanks. You gonna watch?”, Duff asked. “Of course, silly”, I said as we left his room. Steven was drumming his sticks on the wall and Slash’s top hat. Izzy stood staring at the floor. “Iz?”, I asked.  He looked up at me, I pulled him to my arms, “Can’t stay mad at you, no matter how much I try to. I’m sorry screaming at you this morning”, I whispered. “It's okay kid, you’re just doing your job. We kinda give you a hard time, sorry about overreacting to you”, Izzy rubbed my back. “Good luck”, I kissed his cheek. “Thanks”, Izzy smiled. “Hey you two made up”, Axl said. “We did”, I smiled. They had to go on. 

I’m glad we can fuss at each other and at the end of day we got each other's back. Crazy, dysfunctional family, but it was the closest thing to a family I had.

[iammarylastar]

7. Hurricane.

Another day driving to the safe house. Jack was all but safe. He could explode at any time. He tried to speak with Shade. He made the first step but she refused and had maintained a stubborn silence since. He could see her red eyes, circled by black lines. She must have cried and faked to sleep as much as he had. She nonetheless kept taking good care of Anna and had a few words with John.  But nothing with him. Not a word nor a glance. And it was killing him. He had made his best to give attention to Anna those last two days but he had felt like he had done all wrong.

How could he switch into a father in such a short gap? What could he do or say to bond with this cutie little girl?

She had come to him a couple of times, asking for stories or play games but he had stayed mute and blankly, ignoring which behaviour could be more appropriate.

How could he a damn father?

He has seen disappointment and sadness in Anna’s eyes each time he has failed to act like any normal human being would have done with a kid.  He could have ripped his own skin off, blaming himself to be such an idiot, he knew chatting with little ones, laughing at their jokes, tickling their chubby sides. But he was too impressed by this tiny person, knee high to a grasshopper. His daughter.

The night has fallen, Anna is asleep, her head resting on the pillow he took from their last room. If he was unable to interact with his child, he knew at least to have her safe and comfortable.

John is chitchatting with Shade, he asks for random things, she answers with yes, no or grumbles.

“He really hadn’t sent you any news from Berlin? Any? ”

“None.”

“Jack you should have given news. At least a proof of life to Shade or your family.”

“You know the rules John. Any contact with family is not allowed. Safety measures.”

“I know that. But there are ways to keep contact. I managed to stay in touch with Molly in my day.”

“I kept contact with Lucy at the beginning.” Jack barely admits.

“You… what?” Shade explodes.

“…” Jack finds nothing to answer.

“Jack, tell me you’re kidding me.” John whispers.

“Lucy was just back from her abduction! You know about it! You saved her!” He tries to explain.

“I know that! But you could have left a message for Shade.”

“I was worried about my sis! I thought Shade would wait for me. I thought she loved me!

“Fucker!” Shade bursts into tears of rage. “You kept in touch with your fucking sister and NOT WITH ME ?”

“Lucy had been abducted and almost killed by terrorists! I’m sorry to care about my family!”

“I was about to be your family! You wanted to fucking marry me ! " she cries.

"I would have asked you when I came back! But you were gone!”

“She was pregnant Jack.” John says quietly, tryinĝ to calm everyone down before they wake Anna up. “ You should have asked about her.”

‘And how the fuck was I supposed to know?“ Jack’s voice cracked in tears.

"By asking for me!!” Shade yelps between her cries.

“You’re doing it all wrong Jack.” John whispers.

“Fuck you John!” Jack violently hits the steering wheel.

He swerves the car, his sight is blurry with tears and he barely can focus on the road.

“Jack, pull over here!” John orders. “Stop that fucking car! Now !” He barks when seeing his son keeps going.

Jack slams the breaks and almost jumps out of the car. He's overwhelmed, his brain is fucking with him. Though he’s trained to endure the worst tortures, this was unsustainable. Shade. Anna. He realizes he fucked it up. Totally.

Jack screams in frustration; he needs to punch something, he needs the pain to bleed out. He grabs his head between his hands and crouches down.

“Jack.” John says, hopping out of the car. “Jack get back in the car.”

John grunts and bits back another scream.

“Get in that fucking car and take care of your girl. Stop your bullshit and fight to have your family back.”

Jack glares at his father. Who’s he to tell him what to do with his family?

“Jack. Don’t mess it up like I did. Do you want to live with regrets like me? Get into the car and talk to her. She needs a hug.”

“We’re not a hugging family John.” He retorts sharply.

“Do your best son.” John pats Jack on his shoulder.

Jack sighs, stands up to his feet and walks to the car.

“The things I’m going to do for that kid.” John proudly says. Then mumbles to himself, getting behind the wheel. “Yippi-kai-yay motherfucker.”

“Shade…” Jack whispers, shifting to sit closer to her. She lifts her eyes up to meet his. Her face is drown in tears, her makeup is flicking under her eyes, turning her beautiful features into a huge mess.

Jack wraps her in his arms, hugging her the tightest he could, rocking her against his chest.

God it feels so good to have her against him.

She buries her face in his neck and keeps blaming him.

“You left me Jack. You left and never came back. I wanted you to know your child… but I was so mad at you…” Jack cups the sides of her face and gently brushes her cheek. He couldn’t take his eyes off of her. He wants to kiss her so badly, he wants to get her rid of all this sorrow.

“You should have looked for me.” She grabs the collar of his shirt and clung onto him, desperately needing his touch.

“I’ve been missing you so much. Where have you been?” She lets out in a sob.

Jack kisses her forehead. Her skin under his lips throws shivers down his spine and he can’t help but kissing her again and again. He peppers kisses all over her face, his hands roaming over her neck and shoulders, then back to her face.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry…” he says again and again, feeling his chest is likely to explode.

Shade melts under his touch, her hands stroke his neck and quickly grab the back of his head.

“Hold me tight.” She begs him, pulling him into a searing kiss.

Their lips parting, their tongues dancing together like they were used to, their hands exploring each other’s body, quickly stroking deeper and deeper, Jack and Shade melt into each other, making up for lost time.

Jack leans over Shade as he attacks her throat, his hands pulling her impossibly closer to him, guiding her thigh up around his waist.

Glancing in the rear view mirror, curious to know where these moans and wet noises come from, John argues:

“Wait wait kids! When I said she needs a hug, I didn’t mean do porn on the back seat! Jesus there’s a kid laying there!”

Jack rolls Shade over him, his hands guiding her waist to straddle his lap. Sliding his ass down the seat, spreading his thighs open, Jack growls when Shade presses her folds on his shaft. She grinds herself on top of his jeans, literally eating his mouth. Jack combs her hair back, and pulls her in a deeper kiss. Shade can’t fight the moans that escape her throat, her wetness multiplies as Jack bucks his hips up to meet hers.

“For God sake, kids! Couldn’t you wait a minute? We’re arrived at the motel. Please get a room!” John frowns as he witness what a dad doesn’t want to. Though it makes him happy to see those two finally make up, he’d rather run away before he sees too much.

Still kissing passionately, Jack and Shade extend their arms towards John and flip the bird at the same time. And resume their strokes.

“OK. I got it. Come on old man, save that little girl from the hugest nightmare ever.” John hops from the driver’s seat and walks to the back of the car to pick up the sleeping little girl. “Let’s go to bed princess. Your mom and dad obviously need privacy to ‘talk’. I hope you always wanted a baby brother because another McClane is in progress.”

He kicks the back door shut with his hip and can’t help but smirking. “Have fun kids!” And walks to check in for two rooms.

Pulling back, Shade starts working on Jack’s belt and quickly yanks both his jeans and boxers down his knees, Jack grunts loudly as his painful hard cock jumps free on his lower belly. Capturing her lips once again, he roughly tugs on her shirt, ripping off half of the buttons. Shade tilts her head back as Jack trails wet open kisses towards her breasts, he knows being her weakness.

“I want you back, Cupcake.” She whispers in his ear, nibbling at his lobe before licking the back of his neck which usually makes him lose his mind.

Jack sneaks his hands under her skirt and grabs the hem of her undies he tears to the side. Staring up at her green eyes sparkling with lust, he guides her ass up to line her dripping core with the head of his cock.

“I want you now, Boo.”

He slams her ass down on him and they both cry in pleasure, their faces twisting under the delicious feeling of their body united as one.

After a first primal release inside the car, they run hand in hand in the motel room John has left open and free for them. They spend the rest of the night forgiving each other’s faults and misunderstandings, hearts and souls devoted to each other.

Jack shows her how professional and skilled he is in witness-protection, never leaving an inch of her body exposed, only focuses on her safety. Shade for once sleeps peacefully, vulnerable but relaxed, uncovered, but with Jack’s large body blanketed around her.

Thx to my wondeful bêta @tigpooh67 @kenzieam @frecklefaceb @badassbaker @oddsnendsfanfics @beltz2016 @bookwarm85 @angelswannawearmyredshooz @beautifulramblingbrains @singingpeople @jaicourtneyseyes @jaihardi @writingismyhappytime

@shaunarcanine

@mo320

[eremika0000]

(Ferriswheelshipping) Awakened Emotions Chapter 6

Hey guys, I'm back with another chapter! I hope I'm not rushing their relationship too much, haha. Anyways, enjoy!

White shoves the complimentary vibrator into her bag, away from N's curious and way too innocent hands. “Don't worry about it...” Her cheeks burn as she wondered what exactly she was going to do with this free gift that the hotel had so graciously provided...

N tilts his head to the side, very confused at what she had stowed away in her bag. His curiosity blazes, but he doesn't want to annoy White. He takes a step farther into the love hotel, closing the door behind him. Both he and White gasp as they take in more of their surroundings.

The hotel was rather small, but very vibrantly decorated with pink furniture everywhere. What really stood out though, was the fact that the shower was in the corner of the room. It wasn't behind any closed doors, it was just out in the open for anyone in the room to see.

What kind of kinky crap is this? I know it's a couple's themed hotel room, but give some privacy! White fumes to herself, mortified at the thought of having to shower while in N's presence. She had really wanted to shower, and she definitely needed privacy to do that. On further speculation of the hotel room, she was pleased to find that the toilet was in a normal bathroom behind a door like it should be.

It didn't take White too long to find a massive cage that could fit a person in the other corner of the room next to the bed. The cage was attached to the wall, and the bars were a bright pink color to match the room. She wondered why the cage was there, but it didn't take her too long to make assumptions.

Kinky bastards… White thinks.

N was also checking out the love hotel room, looking at everything with wide eyes. He heads over to the other corner of the room where the shower was set up. He furrows his eyebrows together, confused. “White, why is this shower not in the bathroom? What's the point of the shower if everyone can see you?”

He didn't seem embarrassed at all, and White envied that. She felt incredibly awkward right now.

White didn't really want to explain the love hotel situation to N, since she didn't exactly know how far his knowledge of intimacy went. She knew he had been isolated for a while and she had noticed he had a lack of common knowledge in many subjects. She didn't want to bring up the love hotel because it could possibly open up a whole other can of worms for awkward and strange discussions.

“Yea, it really is a weird hotel.” White says as she climbs into the pink cage to investigate. Sitting inside the cage, she felt like a gigantic bird. N sees her sitting in the cage. He raises one eyebrow, a little smile making its way onto his face. He was intrigued and amused by this development of White seeming to lock herself up. N ambles towards White and the cage, and she looks up at him in confusion behind the bars. Feeling playful with a mischievous grin across his face, he gently closes the cage door.

“Hey, N!” White exclaims, not believing he had just done that. “Let me out!” She furiously shakes the pink bars of the cage, the metal rattling violently. Although she was amazed he had locked her up, she couldn't help but be a bit amused at the situation as well when N started chuckling.

“Now you see what it feels like to be a Pokemon stuck in your ball all the time.”

White lets out a little humph, crossing her arms. She definitely didn't want to have this discussion right now, even though she knew N was just playing around. He comes forward and unhinges the cage door, freeing White.

She crawls out of the pink cage, standing up again with a little sigh. She honestly didn't know what to do now. Quite honestly, she felt gross from walking around the city and she wanted to shower. However, the love hotel design definitely was making that hard for her. Instead of bringing up the dilemma, she stayed silent, standing in the middle of the room and shuffling her feet.

N abruptly breaks the silence. “I'm going to take a shower.”

White opened her mouth to object. Didn't he have any sense of self preservation? Does he not know you're not supposed to shower in front of others?

“I'm going to shower partially clothed, of course.” Truthfully, N was feeling a bit nervous about the whole situation as well. Whenever he had bathed before, he was always in the privacy of his own room. However, he wanted to show to White that he was responsible and she could feel comfortable around him. At least, that's how he thought she would think of this whole situation.

White grins, entertained at his sudden idea, but also feeling a little nervous as well. “Okay, I won't look or anything, I'll be looking at my Pokedex in the corner over here so take your time. I'll even face the wall so you can feel comfortable.”

N clears his throat, the awkwardness getting a bit more tense. The pair could practically feel the atmosphere thickening around them. Talking about showering while in the same room, even when they will be fully clothed, it's still a bit weird. “Okay… Thank you, White.” He heads up towards the bathroom to get dressed, bringing his bag with.

White gulps, heading towards the corner opposite from the revealed shower. She gets on her knees, taking out her Pokedex and facing towards the wall like she promised. She powers on the device and idly scrolls through the entries of Pokemon, trying to keep her mind off this whole awkward and strange situation that was causing her heart to beat what felt like a million times a minute.

She hardly even knew N, and yet she was sharing a hotel room with him. A love hotel room with him, at that. But she didn't choose that. Her mother definitely wouldn't approve, but it was too late now. After some thinking, White decided staying in a hotel room would be better than camping outside that particular night. It was conveniently freezing outside, and White swears the heavens were out to mess with her life and make it as awkward as possible.

Sure, make some creep try to violate me at the city… White shivers at the memory, shaking it away. Then I'm in just my bra and shorts around N, a guy probably around my age who I haven't known for more than a few months. Then, the weather conveniently happens to be freezing outside, making camping impossible. And this city happens to have only a hotel with a love room in it, being the only available room. They don't even have a hotel at the Pokemon center like they did in Sandgem town. What are the odds of all this crap?

White sighs, running her hands through her hair in exasperation at her incredibly crazy life. I mean, I did invite N to travel with me and all, but I didn't expect being stuck in this sort of situation. It's not bad, it's actually a bit exciting, but incredibly nerve wracking… I definitely shouldn't be considering N in a romantic sense, since he and I were fighting for our ideals not too long ago. Then again, would that really be a problem? I really do enjoy spending time with him, and I think it is nice how he cares so much for Pokemon. I definitely don't regret inviting him to travel with me, I hope he doesn't either. But then again, why am I even considering him in a romantic sense? I doubt he feels that-

White's jumbled erratic thoughts are interrupted by the sudden sound of a door slamming open. Surprised, she whips her head around to see N emerging from the bathroom wearing only plain black swim trunks. His entire upper body was exposed. His body was very lean and lightly muscled from who knows what. He was very fair skinned, and White finds herself staring. N notices her staring, and their gazes meet. White blushes, quickly turning her head back around towards the wall and hoping he didn't think she was a pervert.

I forgot I wasn't supposed to look, but he surprised me! White buries her face in her hands, mortified.

Meanwhile, N is standing there, feeling quite conflicted. He felt ashamed that White had seen him in his half naked state, and he wondered why she had looked even after she said she wouldn't. At the same time, he felt a bit proud and happy that she wanted to look at him for some reason. And also at the same time, he felt a bit crestfallen that she had looked away from him so quickly.

Why did she look? She said she was going to look away and stay in the corner and use her Pokedex instead… But why did she look away so quickly? Does she find me unappealing? N felt a little pain in his heart at this thought. Does she think I'm disgusting?

He shakes his head to himself, warding off his thoughts. He was feeling overwhelmed, too many new emotions were taking place in his existence and he felt like he was going to explode from all these new irrepressible and overpowering feelings. An entire decade in the castle hadn't given him anywhere near as crazy feeling and experiences that he had gotten in his few short months away from the castle for the first time. To be truthful to himself, N was overwhelmed, but he was overall enjoying nearly everything. Especially his time with White.

N continues to over think things in his mind as he showers, and eventually he turns off the water, silencing it, hoping it would also silence his conflicting thoughts. However, it didn't. He dresses quickly back into his usual outfit, except minus the white button up over his black sweater because White was wearing it.

“I'm done, White.” N announces timidly. White spins around, hoping the tension between them would cease. It had a little bit, but White was about to ruin it. “I'm going to shower next, N. Do you mind if I wear your shirt for now?”

N shakes his head. “You can keep it as long as you like, White.”

“Thank you. I'm going to go shower now, so don't look!”

She knew the irony of the statement, since she had peeked on N, but she hoped he wouldn't do the same or she thought she might just come undone on the spot. As she dresses, N heads over to the bed, crawling under the covers. He wonders idly to himself how both he and White would sleep in the same bed, since the hotel bed was very tiny. Unfortunately there weren't any couches in the little hotel room, and N hoped White wouldn't ask him to sleep on the floor. Though he would, if she asked. He buries himself under the covers, wondering if this is what an Drilbur feels like when they burrow into the ground. He hopes White wouldn't mind him hiding under the covers as she showered, he was quite tired and wanted to be comfy.

Meanwhile, White comes out of the bathroom in her swimsuit and heads towards the shower. She chuckles when she sees the big lump under the covers of the pink bed where she assumed N was most likely hiding. “N, what are you doing?” White continues to laugh as she steps into the shower and turns on the water. She was starting to feel a bit more comfortable with the whole shower situation.

“It's so I can't see you shower.” N's voice is muffled from under the covers, and White can barely understand him. Hearing him saying a line like that reminds her again of just how strange her whole situation was.

White's shower is quick and calming, and she feels clean and fresh as she heads out of the bathroom after getting dressed back into her shorts and N's white button down shirt. “Okay N, I'm done. Are you ready to sleep for tonight?”

N throws the cover off his face, breathing heavily from being stuck down under the covers for so long. “Yes, I'm tired, so if you don't mind, I'd like to go to sleep...”

White nods, heads over towards the door by the entrance, and flicks the light switch off. The room instantly goes completely dark, and White has a hard time finding her way back towards the bed. The small window by the bed barely let in any light, and she was currently feeling her way around to get back to the bed. She accidentally grabbed something weird, it felt like a foot. A little whine confirmed this, she had accidentally grabbed N's foot while trying to make her way back. Apparently he was quite ticklish. White snickers, wanting desperately to tickle him more but decides against it. N blushes, ashamed he had made such a noise.

She crawls into the pink fluffy bed, and she is dismayed to find that there is hardly enough room for the two of them. When laying as close as possible to the edges of the bed, their shoulders still touched a bit. N felt strange, sharing a bed with someone else. He found that he sort of liked it, but his heart was pounding furiously at the unfamiliar and exciting situation.

It is silent for a while, neither of them say anything. It was a bit unnerving yet strangely comforting to have someone else by your side, even if you had just been battling them to change the world only a few days prior. Both of them happen to be thinking the same thing, how much that had happened in the past week and how much more they had got to known each other.

The events from the past day suddenly flood N's mind. “White, I'm so glad I was able to help you today in the city. Are you sure you're okay?” Her intense sobbing was still fresh in his memory, and it broke his heart that it could have been avoided if he had only helped her a bit sooner.

White sighs. “It was terrifying, but I'm glad you were able to help. I'm okay because of you. Thanks again, N.”

“I'm sorry I couldn't help you sooner… I would hate to have my first human friend hurt just because I was too slow.”

She gasps, and this surprises N. “What is it? Do you not consider us friends?” He feels a sharp pain in his heart at this. He really wanted to be friends with White, and he wanted to spend time with her. He would be very sad if she didn't feel the same way.

Has he really never had another human friend? I knew he was isolated, but I didn't know he was to that extent. I feel so bad… I was constantly surrounded by my friends, always happy. N had to suffer all alone.

“No...” White murmurs. “That's not it, I would love to be your friend! But you really didn't have any friends until me? Weren't you lonely?”

N stares up at the ceiling, contemplating. “I was a bit lonely sometimes, but I usually had my Pokemon friends to keep me company. At lot were often abused, but I helped take care of them. They were not just my friends, but my family as well. Concordia and Anthea were my family, too.”

She thinks of the little boy sitting alone in his room surrounded by abused Pokemon. Her heart breaks a little for him. “Did you and Ghetsis ever have a better relationship before all this happened? Was he always so power hungry?”

“I was abandoned by my parents in the woods, and Ghetsis found and adopted me. I was grateful to him that he gave me a place to say, and I never really disliked him until the end. I thought I knew him, but I never truly did. I thought he cared for Pokemon, at least a little, but he was just power hungry.” As N speaks, he absentmindedly traces his fingers up his arm along a deep scar that White hadn't noticed before. She could see it dimly through the moonlight shining into the window.

“N, where did you get that scar? It looks very deep.”

N chuckles. “Oh, this scar? It has been here for a long time.”

White waits for his continuation.

“A long time ago, not long after I arrived at the castle, I wanted to explore outside again. That was the first and last time I disobeyed Ghetsis. He told me not to leave, but I tried. I paid the price, he punished me.” N felt a bit uncomfortable talking about such an intimate detail of his past, but he knew he could trust White. The room is completely silent for a few moments, and suddenly N hears quiet sniffling. White suddenly wraps her arms around him, pulling him into an awkward hung since they were still laying on the bed. Her tears drip onto his black sweater.

He instantly becomes very concerned for her. “White, what's wrong? Why are you upset?” He demands.

She sniffles again, managing to sob out a few words. “It's nothing… I just feel so bad, you were treated so badly at the castle.”

N hesitantly brings a hand up to her head before deciding to stroke her hair comfortingly like he had earlier in the day. “Don't worry about me, White. I'm fine.”

“Just remember, I'm your friend, okay!” White pulls out of the hug, and N wishes she hadn't. He had hugged her 3 times so far, and he enjoyed them a lot. It made him feel comforted and warm.

N smiles brightly. Finally, a true human friend. “Thank you, White.”

“Goodnight, N.”

“Goodnight, White.”

Before sleeping, N reaches over the bed to dig through his bag, and he pulls out the Zorua doll White had given him earlier in the day. He returns back to the bed and hugs the doll tightly to his chest as he thinks of White and her kind smile as he dozes off into a peaceful dream. White follows suit soon after, dreaming of Ferris wheels and green hair.

There you go, chapter 6! I really hope you guys enjoyed, please review! It motivates me a lot to write more and I love feedback :). Anyways I'll try to get the next chapter out soon, see ya soon!

[mlcsped]

I really need to see this  I haven’t seen it :( Have any of you? If so what did you think of it, my inquiring mind would love to know :)

[poorkittensosmitten-blog-blog]

Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee.

Blood on the Snow, Rebecca Belmore