#Bruce’s dialogue boxes are annoying

[suffering-and-happy-about-it]

Nicole's Rambling: The Avengers Problem (for PS4)

Let's start with the usual chanting: ❗this is my opinion, it's biased as hell (since I grew up with Marvel comic books and movies) and you don't have to agree❗

I was wondering why Avengers game gets so hated... So I took a look and I played it myself. Let’s have a look.

SPOILERS AHEAD

First off: the game isn't in any way horribly bad. It's just a button smasher with a story that has its good and bad beats. It's not memorable at all, but it could've gone way more downhill in my opinion.

At the start of the game, you meet the mighty Avengers through child fan's eyes - it's pure fanservice and let's be honest, it's dope. It was sweet, but pretty dragged, to be honest. I really didn't need to play as all five Avengers (HAWKEYE IS MISSING, AGAIN) in the first hour of the game, but sure, why not?

For the most part, you see the squad through Kamala Khan's eyes. For those who might have not a clue who the hell Kamala is; I am not wondering about why you don't know who the hell she is. She's a Marvel heroine who outed in 2013 and who will have her own spinoff on Disney+.

And again, Ms Marvel is fine, but not memorable at all. I've never, until this day, met anyone who would say that 'Ms Marvel is my favourite superhero'. I was halfway through the game before I even realized it's Ms Marvel - AFTER SHE PULLED HER DAMN COSTUME OUT. That can be due to my utter ignorance or because I heard of her so little that I can count it on my fingers. In all honesty, I loved Kamala as the story progressed, the gal's not bad at all - but as the whole game, she had good and bad beats. There were times where I wished to play as Iron Man and the game forced me to play as her... Whatever.

Let's look at the three problems I have with this game and three positives I found in the game:

0. (Technically zero since it's a personal problem of mine) The soundtrack and the voice actors:

By any means, I am not trying to say they should hire RDJ for the role of Iron Man and Mark Ruffalo for the role of Banner... But it was so hard to distinguish the voice of Nolan North (For example: Nathan Drake x Iron Man) and Troy Baker (Samuel Drake x Bruce Banner). For me, as for a PS4 gamer, it's annoying to hear the same voices again and again in every game I am genuinely excited about (Idk how Xbox players are familiar with them). Of course, there's even Laura Bailey as the Black Widow; I feel like these are the three only people who do voice acting for games these days and sure, I should've seen that coming.

Side note: Nolan North is not a good fit for Iron Man in the slightest in my opinion, but if you like his Iron Man, that's cool as well!

The soundtrack... M A N, the soundtrack. When I heard Marvel gave a green light to the Avengers game, I expected to hear at least the iconic Alan Silvestri's 'The Avengers'. Problem with this is simple: Marvel had spoiled its consumers with good and memorable soundtracks (don't you tell me you don't remember as they all gathered for the first time). Since it was Marvel itself who gave the green light for this project, which was supposed to be based loosely on the movies' and comic book success, I hoped to get all of it.

It's not Iron Man when AC/DC song isn't playing in the background as he flies through a canyon for his life. I mean, Iron Maiden are fine; but come on. COME ON. It's not the same. It's not the Avengers (WITHOUT HAWKEYE) without their significant theme.

1. IT. BUGS. ALL. THE. TIME and the combat is incredibly repetitive:

When I was little, I was a rage gamer. I could barely play Crash Bandicoot or Rayman without losing my cool. Since then, I grew up, skilled and etc. I try not to rage when playing games since it's simply not worth it.

But when you're replaying a boring mission for the tenth part and you're almost over and SUDDENLY, the game bugs out and you lose control over the character (it starts running in circles, etc.) it sucks shit. And don't let me start on the minor bugs. Like when you don't cross the platform by one pixel and the game doesn't let you make combos when you're in the air and bug into a tree when you bug into a wall, a rock, fucking nothing... Bruh. It was released in August, shouldn't these bugs be fixed by now? The game is fucking broken, hoes. It barely feels like a game ready to launch at times.

When you're so lucky that you don't bug out in the middle of doing something, the combat... It isn't bad. It's not terrible, but the Avengers deserved something better. It didn't deserve mediocre combat that repeats itself in every level. Once you find yourself good combo, you're done for. You can use it to finish the game if you will.

2. There's too many missions, too much information and too much things player has to understand if he wants to play the game properly:

Okay, this might seem to be a little confusing; I didn't understand the game system at all when I first ran it on my PS4. There's story missions, HARM training sessions, daily missions for particular heroes, faction missions (SHIELD, Pym, Stark, etc.) and character-side-story missions, and a lot more.

Trust me, it doesn't sound that hard, but once you open the map menu for yourself... Oh boy, that's a different story. And if it only was the map menu. The inventory and such aren't too collected all together either. Before you can safely tell what is what, it will take you at least a whole afternoon. Also, the fact that game just spills it on you just like that, one thing after another, it doesn't help the overall feel.

On top of that, there are MULTIPLE currencies in the game; some even involve microtransaction. It mostly is involving the customization of the Avengers, so it's not THAT big of a deal; you can get one currency by collecting boxes and stuff, but it takes ages before you can buy one single thingy.

Also, if you would like to get stuff (very useful stuff) from factions (SHIELD and Pym mainly), you have to do in-factions daily quests, which usually require to do a certain amount of things as a particular hero (you can do some quests with Ms Marvel only, some with Black Widow, it usually involves the damage dealt while playing as a character etc.). And if you forget to fetch these minies? Well, no faction points for you, bucko.

The system feels overall too complicated in the begging and even after finishing the game, I am not certain by some.

3. The gameplay of the one and only... Natasha Romanov, and the entirety of Steve Rogers:

Right off the bat: IT. SUCKS. SHIT.

This was your shot in opening our mouths and showing why Black Widow BELONGS to the Avengers in the first place. Like, sure, storywise you proved the point, but gameplaywise... That's a different story.

Out of the bunch, Natasha feels the slowest, most clumsy and overall not too pleasant to play as. Mainly is because her attacks do... Nothing. The gun reloading is basically constant when I have to put it simply and it takes about 3-5 seconds for her to even reload; which can be a matter of life and death inside the game. Sure, she can make herself invisible; but that's like... It. It's not that it would be suffering when you are forced to play as Nat... But not a pleasant experience either.

On the other hand, maybe it's just me. I have friends who told me the same about her gameplay, but maybe there's someone who enjoys the Black Widow. It's my personal with the entirety of the gameplay.

Steve, on the other hand, isn't hard to play as. It's just fucking boring. At the start of the game, I couldn't wait to play as Steve's character. He seemed to be awesome - Jesus fuck, how could I be so wrong? As I said, he's incredibly boring and dry, his skills would do the same amount of work if they even weren't there. I think that Rogers is there just for the shock value (as a value that doesn't even work in the slightest) and nothing more.

As you learn to do the tricks and combos with them, it gets slightly better and skill tree and equipment upgrades can help almost unnoticeable... But really, Steve and Natasha are the absolute worst.

Now the reasons why the game convinced me it isn't a hot mess as I initially thought:

1. The characters, dynamics, chemistry and the overall story:

Sure, it is mainly a basic plotline, a cookie-cutter one, full of cliché - Avengers have to regroup after a traumatic event and you're the one who has to find them and bring them together.

Yet it is quite interesting; the game leads you to believe that Steve Rogers is dead after an event called the 'A-Day' (which you won't believe even if the game does the hardest to make you to, constantly remaining you that 'Oh boy, Cap died, did you know that?') and the Avengers had left to exile because they were considered as big bad for the people and the country. They have their emotional baggage and the banter between Banner and Stark (though it ends too soon), is just the thing that makes them human and relatable.

Even the villains are quite compelling; not like ultra super convincing, but the game can turn around when you least expect it to; which is definitely a huge plus.

The characters were done GOOD. The dialogues are full of personality and jokes you'd expect from each one of them; Banner is a wallflower cutie, Tony fishes for compliments all the time, Natasha is the big independent woman she always was and Thor? CHEF'S KISS, I swear. It hits the Shakespearean vibe perfectly and at the same time, he still is charming and quite funny to hang around.

Every time you can listen to a chit-chat between two characters, it is a great pleasure for you as a Marvel fan. Also, I need to say that regardless of my personal issue with the dub (regarding Tony and Bruce; since they're the people you spend most of your time with), the dialogues for these two characters are on point without a doubt. And I kinda grew fond of the in-game Bruce Banner throughout the course of the game, to be honest.

There are references, jokes, inside jokes, one-liners... The dialogue was done amazingly and that's a huge   T H A N K   Y O U  to the developers.

2. The mind-blowing gameplay of... Tony Stark and Thor and AI, while not being too bright, getting stronger as you do:

In what the Natasha gameplay lacks, these two give you exactly what would you expect and way, way more than you'd ask for. Again, it mainly reflects the personal gameplay preferences of the player; let me tell you why I think these gameplays are, in my opinion, the best.

a) Tony's gadgets and weaponry: The suit itself is bloody brilliant. Once you master the ability to attack and fly at the same time, you have the moments when you can not only feel like Iron Man - but really be Iron Man. It's not even that your gameplay would suddenly become 10x easier; it significantly becomes funnier.

b) Thor's heavy fist-to-fist and Mjolnir preferences: the Mjolnir is bloody brilliant as well. Thor's combat is mainly physically based, but when you want to throw the hammer around like the madman you are, you can suit yourself. You can use the lightning if you please and you can fly if this style of combat suits you. It's all in your hands. Thor can take quite a bit of damage, which is significantly supporting you in this style. If you accidentally drop Mjolnir? Well, call it back and smash them!

Also, regarding the AI... As I said, they're certainly not the brightest sparks in the flame; yet thanks to the power getting bigger as you level up and continue with your story and a huge variety of enemies - from turrets to flying men with flamethrowers. It is just button smasher, but a pleasing one in this regard, I must say.

3. The fanservice to comic book fans, movie fans and loyalty to the property:

As one IGN review once said... "This game makes you feel like Batman." And this game more or less accomplished it as well, but diluted and stripped down. Of course, in no way I can compare this to the masterpiece to the Arkham saga; these games are brilliant.

But there are moments when the game can just drag you inside the story and tell you: "You're Iron Man now, boss. It's in your hands." And it's there. I think the only issue was that the team of devs just took too big of a bite. I wouldn't mind stand-alone titles emerging into one and big Avengers game. That would be fun as well and I would spend my time with it gladly.

To end it: it's a mess, but a good mess you might like. If I was to rate it, would be 5.1/10 Wait until it is on sale, don't rush it. I'm overall disappointed and I most likely will forget I have ever played it.

[lovelyirony]

Emotional TonyNat fic? Either's POV. One tryin to avoid the other because the feeling's so deep, it's already scary..

Tony failed two literature classes in college. Two. Both times, it was kind of only maybe sort of his fault. 

But not really. 

Kind of. 

Yeah. 

The problem with a guy like Tony is that he sees everything logically. He doesn’t get how literature is set up, why he has to read a play as pointless as Macbeth. It was obvious that he was ill-suited for the throne and due to that, his wife tried to take over but also realized that neither can do it, went crazy from a morality crisis, and then it went on for ages. 

He doesn’t do small talk, which is partially why he takes the business world by such a storm. If you’re boring, Tony will not talk to you. He will tell you that he wants to get to the point, and you better do it. 

Natasha Romanoff is the same way. 

She knows what she’s meant to do, what is expected of her. She will not do more than that, will not do less. 

Being a part of a team that you have an emotional stake in causes complications, they both come to find out. When you care about people, nothing is exact. 

Natasha finds herself sliding over a box of tea for Bruce just because she remembers that he was saying he was nearly out, and he didn’t want to deal with the crowds that much, particularly. 

She stares at herself in a mirror for a long time after that. 

Because she’s Black Widow. She’s heartless. She’s a picture of perfection, stone cold down to the gaze. 

Tony’s becoming the same way. Soft. He keeps making sure that Steve doesn’t fall asleep on the couch and complain about how he slept the wrong way, and that Natasha’s bike is still in top condition. 

“I know how to care for my bike,” Natasha snaps one day, Tony rolling his eyes. 

“Your bike has never received the special Stark Treatment. I��ll have her practically jumping to go.” 

“Fine,” Natasha snaps. “But I get to drive the Audi anywhere I want to go.” 

“I hope you know if you crash my car, that’s four million,” Tony says. “Custom work doesn’t come cheap.” 

Natasha gags as she looks at the car. 

“That for four million?” 

“Clean energy when it wasn’t a priority,” Tony says. “Hell of a dent for pocketbooks to take.” 

“And I’m sure yours handled it with grace.” 

Natasha comes back at night. She doesn’t tell anyone where she’s been, although she throws a paper bag for a bookstore in the recycling, according to Jarvis. 

“Do you always have to keep tabs on me?” she asks, not even looking up. She’s the only one who has resolutely made herself not do it, finding it completely stupid. 

“Only when one is hellbent on world domination.” 

“I’m only a little bent.” 

“My mistake, Agent Romanoff.” His damned AI project sounds amused. Has sass. She’s frustrated with how good he makes things. She doesn’t understand how he does that. 

Tony’s in his lab. He has on an old tank top, eating a smoothie and gagging because “Kale? You put kale in this, Dum-E? God, I bet you got that from your mother, Rhodey-dear--” 

“Bike. Where is it.” 

Tony looks up, posture straightening as he takes in the sight of Romanoff. 

“Looking good. I see you kept the top down.” 

“You might have a speeding ticket.” 

“I swear if you sped by the police station and they find out--” 

“You’ll be proud of me?” she cuts in, smirking. He’s getting up off the couch, going to the actual garage area. He throws open the door, revealing the bike with some new parts and a brand new kickstand. 

“I don’t know what you heroes do to your bikes, but your tires were about to give out,” Tony says. 

“Don’t forget you’re a hero too,” she reminds him. There’s a look on his face as he looks towards her that says he’d forgotten. 

Her bike runs like it was made for just that. Like she could go anywhere, even though she just got back. 

After that, she pays a lot of attention to Tony Stark. 

He has an annoying attention to detail. Everything has to be exact, everything has to be according to what will happen in the future or even as it’s going on. 

“Because he took architecture classes,” Rhodey says. “Bunch of annoying people, but they’re damned good at perfecting everything. As long as it functions, engineers call it good.” 

She starts finding Tony in her quiet haunts, the kind that leave a bit more haunting behind each time until she has to face it. 

They both realize that they’re not good enough to be heroes. So they’ve been pretending at it, but they also don’t know how to play pretend. 

It’s a rather frustrating thing, then. 

Natasha likes to be exact. 

Emotions are the exact opposite of that, which is why she hates that her heart races and she wants to be imagining what it’s like to be in his arms, his hands tangling through her hair, and--

Look. She doesn’t want this. She doesn’t want to imagine love and imagine smiles that aren’t meant for anyone else because...

Black Widows aren’t made for that. She’s not made for that. She’s meant for killing people, for being cold. To look at people and not form personal connections, to put hearts out for the taking for anyone else. She lets people fall in love with her, but she’s never done it herself. 

And so she runs. Running away from problems is actually a feasible solutions. People just tell you that because they want you to stay. She remembers running in Russia away from people she thought she owed loyalty to. She ran from Clint, for a time. 

But Tony’s different. Because it’s Tony who makes her laugh and who takes her to shitty diners so they can say dialogue from Pulp Fiction verbatim, and they annoy Sam and Bucky with their taste in music and the various quotes they pull from movies. It’s Tony who jokes around with her and asks about Russian movies and everything that she wasn’t supposed to know. 

Her heart hammers in her chest as she imagines certain disaster, herself falling in a whole different way, but landing this time. 

Falling in love--the concept and what people think of--doesn’t count landing. They never tell you that you have to land. Now, whether that’s on concrete or onto grass is not up to you. There are multiple exit strategies, but you either crush yourself or you roll and get back up. 

So she doesn’t want to think about it, she doesn’t want to see him. Because there are the heady thoughts of it all, the ways she knows him and the way that she wants to know him. 

For the first time, Black Widow is unsure of her power. 

[midnight-serpentine-blog]

FAQ

In General

Do you take requests? My guy, without requests, this blog will go dry very quickly. We are high maintenance and require a lot of attention.

Will you write all requests that you receive? We reserve the right not to write a request if we don’t vibe with it. We will explain why we won’t, and whining won’t change our minds. Otherwise we will do our absolute best to see that all requests get written.

What if I don’t like something in your fics? If you see something wrong in our fics, feel free to let us know politely. If you are rude, we will make a note of what annoyed you and we will feature it prominently in our following fics until you (or someone nicer than you) asks nicely for us to change it. If it is a trigger we won’t do that, obviously, but we will do our best to tag so that doesn’t happen. Don’t read things if they have a trigger warning for something that triggers you. I shouldn’t have to say it, yet here we are. If you dislike the characterization, we can open up a dialogue and maybe we’ll write you one with a characterization that you prefer. Or maybe we’ll tell you to shove it. Depends on how things go. If you dislike the things we write about (e.g. Death Eaters from Harry Potter), then don’t f***ing read that fic. Blacklist it, whatever. We know why and how they are problematic, we just dgaf. It’s for fun.

Why don’t you have a masterlist/other Tumblr things? We are new to this whole writing thing, Midnight to Tumblr in general, and Serpentine has never written her own post before, so be patient. We are learning this whole thing as we go, and it was meant as more of an experiment than a job anyway. We will do our best to make a masterlist and make the blog easy to search, but it has a learning curve, so don’t be surprised if we don’t manage right away (or ever)

Do you have a tag list? We could try?

How often do you update? Depends on how much love and attention we get. If we get a lot of requests, we’ll be doing a lot of writing, Real Life™ allowing.

Can I reblog? If you make sure our names are still on it, you do what you like, my guy.

Can I tag you in things? Can I give you an internet hug? Ofc. Remember what I said about attention?

Can I message you? If it is for requests, we’d prefer you keep it in the asks, but if you wanna say something, then sure. Keep it PG for Serpentine’s virgin eyes tho. (Serpentine can deal with it, don’t be a wuss - Midnight) (You’re a wanker - Serpentine)

What don’t you write? Incest, non-con, A/B/O (bc Midnight will die), m-preg, underage anything ever, etc. Just keep it level guys. Don’t make it weird.

What happens with any original fiction that you post? I won’t post much of it, and it won’t be anything that I ever have intentions on making into A Thing™ so it’s basically just like our fanfics, go ahead and reblog if you feel just keep our names attached. Also, try not to write anything based off of it or anything like that, but if it sparks something, you do you. We’re reasonably chill until you’re a dick. (Then we’re chillier than a frost giant’s cold shoulder - Midnight)

What happens if I want to be a prick about your writing while on anon? Come at me, bro.

What types of requests do you take? We’re going to try to have a prompts list, or borrow some from fellow writing accounts that are okay with others using their lists, but prompts that you come up with are definitely great! Imagines, multi-chap fics, one-shots, drabbles, headcanons, it’s all fair game.

Serpentine

Name/Nickname: Serpentine, Holly, Andy

Age: 18

Pronouns: she/her/My Lady

How would you describe yourself: I would not

Are requests open: Yes

What do you like writing most: Fluff. I love it when everyone is peaceful.

What do you like writing least: Character bashing. Sometimes I have to for the sake of the plot, but it hurts.

Who do you write for: Marvel - Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers, Tony Stark, Loki, Thor, Dr. Strange, Clint Barton, Pietro Maximoff (he didn’t die hmmm nope), Frank Castle (Jon Bernthal only), Brock Rumlow (don’t say anything Midnight, I know he’s a dick, leave me alone), Anatoly Ranskahov, Vladimir Ranskahov. Harry Potter - Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, Charlie Weasley, Fred Weasley, George Weasley, Draco Malfoy, Antonin Dolohov, Thorfinn Rowle, Rodolphus Lestrange (although I characterize him as fatherly more than anything), Rabastan Lestrange (although don’t expect mental stability), Fenrir Greyback, Corban Yaxley, Evan Rosier, Lucius Malfoy (if we go AU), Lucissa (Narcissa Black nee Malfoy + Lucius Malfoy), Theodore Nott, Blaise Zabini, Regulus Black, Jily (James + Lily), Sily (which is my take on Sirius + Lily, though mostly they are platonic sometimes I think hmm). I have a lot of my own personal headcanons for nearly all of these characters because I have spent many years of my life ‘living’ in the Wizarding World when I should have been doing my homework, so if something doesn’t vibe for you, I apologise, but I am very specific about my Harry Potter. 

POV & Other Characters: These can be OC or reader, platonic and romantic or unpaired accepted. For Harry Potter, I can also write them as Hermione Granger (like most HP fics are tbh). As for other characters, it’s all negotiable, but with Harry Potter fandom Slytherin characters are much more likely to get the OK bc I’m House biased (Go Snakes). The ones marked as couples are only written as couples, so don’t try to make me pair dear James Potter with anyone other than his Lily.

How long does it take to write a request: If I’m inspired, maybe an hour or two. Now when I post it...

Open to ask memes: Absolutely the hell yes. I love talking about myself.

Special Rules: I do not write smut (yet, bc I am innocent in the ways of the flesh), but I will yeet those to Midnight and I’ll do my best to take any other requests and if y’all wanna drop nasty imagines into the ask box or something, we’re all ears (eyes?). I will write poly ships, though again I reserve the right to decide how (e.g. M/M or nah) and there will be no sin.

Midnight

1. Name/Nickname: Midnight, Kai, (Barnes)

2. Age: 19

3. Pronouns: she/her/Soldat

4. How would you describe yourself: I... am basically a less intimidating Winter Soldier (memory problems, depression, anxiety) and an MCU genderbent Loki because I can be a sneaky little shit

5. Are requests open: YEET

6. What do you like writing most: Fluff. Any time I get to make scary assassins do domestic things... I am there for that

7. What do you like writing least: Death. Why y’all gotta do me dirty like that? There’s more than enough in the MCU alone guys. Can’t we just pretend we live in the Everybody Lives AU?

8. Who do you write for: Marvel - Loki Odinson, Thor Odinson, Tony Stark, Doctor Stephen Strange, Bucky Barnes, Peter Quill, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanov, T’Challa, Peter Parker (aged up), Pietro Maximoff, Wade Wilson (Deadpool), Gamora DC - Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Diana Prince, Clark Kent, Connor Kent, Dick Grayson, Steve Trevor, Tim Drake, Wally West, Barry Allen, Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy, Catwoman, Damian Wayne (aged up), Kaldur’ahm, Jaime Reyes, Bart Allen (aged up), Roy Harper (if you want YJ’s Red Arrow, please specify, otherwise my default is Arsenal), Hal Jordan Assassin’s Creed - Altair, Ezio

9. POV & other characters: I prefer reader inserts, however, if you would like an OC I would recommend naming the OC with a nickname so it makes it nicer for other readers to enjoy it. I will do specific ships if I ship them or I know enough about the ship. (eg WonderTrevor, SuperWonder, Stony, Stucky, IronStrange etc) I am also pretty okay with writing smut, but I may not be able to for specific characters/ships due to lack of experience in writing the sin, lol. (and yes, I will take your smut requests for Serpentine’s characters, and work with her to achieve the correct characterization, so long as time permits us to work on it in a timely fashion)

10. How long does it take to write a request: Depends on how busy I am, the alignment of the stars, the weather… jk, in truth, I can be very busy and also have to manage my own health so it can be from a half hour (if I’m really inspired) to up to a week or two. (I will try my best to turn out work in a decent time though, and if I have to ask Serpentine for help I will)

11. Special Rules: Already covered, I guess? Just bear with me on getting things out on time.

Please note; most of this was written by Serpentine at 3 am, I (Midnight), only wrote my own FAQs, also at 3 am. If none of this makes sense, that would be why. Serpentine rarely makes sense without supervision, so feel free to ask for clarification if the wording is awkward.

[scruffybat]

i have more thoughts than expected so it’s under a read more but the tldr is king asks a bunch of decent bat/cat questions but then doesn’t actually answer them. when he does seem to give answers he then manages to contradict them. his weird dialogue, scene choices, and the timeline jumping doesn’t help. i don’t understand helena. 

okay I thought about it on my run and here’s what it is: he’s going for some things aren’t black or white some things are grey. multiple shades of grey. if bat is good, joker is bad, cat is somewhere in the middle. some people like boxes and struggle with people that don’t fit in them, one of those people being bruce. but he loves her, so how does that work? 

he talks about this whole bit of their both in pain and that’s what makes them the way they are. in some sense it’s them against the world (but also not really). all of these are perfectly fine topics to explore with bat/cat

so king poses all these hypotheses but then never actually goes anywhere with them! joker tells catwoman she’s basically just batman, which obvs she isn’t, but it pisses her off and then they have a batman-themed wedding?? is it funny? yes. does it just go back on the point you literally just made? also yes. bruce settles on the fact that he loves her but we don’t get any reasoning for why that is, other than he just chooses to. which yes okay that’s fine but there are no steps in the middle to show this character growth.

for several issues selina hangs out with the joker casually. i get he was trying to do a weird triangle thing with the three of them but there is no reason why this would happen. it could be because she’s trying to distinguish herself from batman, but that’s a lame YA angst reason. it could be to keep tabs on him, but then she doesn’t nothing with that knowledge. (it’s established she doesn't tell bruce bc then joker would never let her in on anything, and she doesn’t want bruce to know she hangs with him). make it make sense.

in his rebirth run i LOVED the idea of “can you be batman and be happy”. i think that’s a great batman question. but he also didn’t do much with that! he chose selena and chose to be happy, she leaves him bc she thinks it’ll stop him being batman and that would be selfish (also a good cat angle), and he shuts down for a while. 

imo, a good way of reconciling this could be: bruce find happiness elsewhere first. namely, his kids & friends. losing selina sucked, but he gradually comes around and learns to be happy as bruce, with his family and the jla etc, and he becomes a better batman for it. selina recognises this and then it goes wherever. 

what actually happened was things get worse and worse and worse for bruce, until selina feels bad for him? i guess???? then they defeat bane by going “no we won’t tag team you” which is a lie. 

((but again - i get what he was aiming for. bat/cat is a great team. even with everything taken away from him cat is there. etc. it just SUCKED))

the fact that king’s dialogue is weird doesn’t help a thing. huge exposition bit i am used to, he’s far from the only one to do that. they characters just say things i can never imagine them saying?? ESPECIALLY bruce. “i fight my whole life since my stupid parents and that stupid gun and those stupide pearls flew everywhere” asdkfjg sorry what????  

the time skips are annoying but fine i guess. i don’t understand helena as a character at all. i think he was going for “she’s like cat so they clash a lot but trying so hard to be bat” but then everyone just talks about how she’s basically bruce. she doesn’t seem to know what her own motivations are so how the hell are we. i’m so confused.

bonus: i love clay mann’s art tho. some of these pages are sooo pretty and i love how he uses fun perspectives. he also makes everyone extremely sexy. 

the thing for me about tom king's batman stuff, especially batman/catwoman, is I feel like I got what he was trying to do with it. he just didn't manage to get it across (partly due to his dialogue which is eeeuegh) may post more thots later

[camsthisky]

Story Starters Meme

Rules: List the first lines of your last 15 stories. See if there are any patterns. Then tag 10 of your favourite authors!

Thank you to @petite-neko for tagging me!

I don’t really write for anything but the batfam anymore, so here we go (also, I’m not going to count any of the sleepover saturday prompts or the the prompts in Life is A Journey)!

1. Where’s Grayson? (Well, besides this one)

“I don’t understand,” Damian says, blinking at the people who had come for him, who had taken him home. Only when he’d gotten there, home wasn’t anywhere to be found. “Where is he?”

2. Maybe This Time Will Be Different

The shower’s been on for a while.

3. Without a Mask

Nine-year-old Richard John Grayson, ward of Bruce Wayne, heir to Wayne Enterprises, was being kidnapped.

4. Judge and Juror

Dick’s dozing on the couch when his phone rings, and he can’t be bothered to look at the caller ID before he answers with a tired, “‘lo?”

5. Home to You

He almost doesn’t make it in time.

6. Looking For a Laugh

Tim covered his face with his hands, and beside him, Cass grinned.

7. To Be Better

“Your mother requests your presence,” the assassin says, like it doesn’t change everything. But it does. It does change everything, and for once in his life, Damian thinks he’s at a loss for words. The assassin is down on one knee, and his face is blank, and he looks so out of place on top of a rooftop in the middle of Gotham.

8. Step Out of the Dark

“Can we talk?”

9. Teach Me to Dream

It starts with a dream.

10. A Couple of Bullets Won’t Get Me Down

“Get Red Robin and meet back here in ten.”

11. Break Me Down and Build Me Up

There was blood dripping into Dick’s eyes from his forehead, but all he could do was squeeze them shut. He couldn’t move his arms, couldn’t move his body. He hurt, he hurt so much that it was almost unbearable, but worst of all were the images. Two-Face bearing down on him with a baseball bat, Judge Watkins dropped to his death.

12. Splash of Pink

“Damian,” a voice mock-whispered. There were snickers to accompany it, and Dick, who wasn’t even the target of the voice, was finding himself a little annoyed. Because he was having a great nap after a hard day of training with Bruce and Damian. Unfortunately, the voices did not give up. “Damian.”

13. Aliens

“Do you think that somewhere out there, there are aliens?”

14. Dare to Jump

“Come on, Tim,” Dick grunted, adjusting Tim as he started to surrender more and weight to Dick. “Come on, I need you stay awake. We still need to get out of here.”

15. I Want Us to Be Batman and Robin Forever

“Hey, B,” Dick said, a cheerful smile on his face as he pulled himself up the ladder and into the attic. “I heard you were looking for some slaves to help you clear out some boxes.”

So, great. I usually either start with dialogue or a very, very vague line. Good to know. I’m tagging @preciousthingsareprecious @caramelmachete @fuyunoakegata @chimaerakitten @jerseydevious @haunt-the-stars @unavenged-robin @tantalum-cobalt @taizi and @seitosokusha but only if you want to.

edit: I realize some of you don’t have 15 fics, but I’d still love to see you do this? So however many fics you have, I’d love to see if you can find any patterns!

[gutsfree-blog]

Some sort of League of Justice? (Review)

A team of heroes coming together to protect the planet from annihilation. They don’t know each other and we have not seen their backstories played out. But it still works. We know Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman. We get enough from their powers and dialogue to understand them. We even get a second season with more characters we barely know but can learn to love like the Question and Huntress. Sixteen years ago, DC was able to show us the Justice League outside of comics and it was great. 

Before Marvel’s multiple successes with the Avengers, the Justice League was the superhero team that everyone knew. After the disappointment of Batman Vs Superman, the trinity deserved a chance at redemption. If there was one thing that Batman V Superman did well, it was to make me excited for future DC character films. Wonder Woman showed that this Universe could still have good films. In my opinion, Man of Steel was also a good film that showed what the universe was capable of. With Justice League, DC returns to disappointment 

Justice League’s plot is simple and very similar to the first Avenger’s film. The problems lie with how different the DCEU has been built vs MCU. Half of the characters in the Justice League are introduced for the first time in this film. Throughout the film, each character has a few scenes that gives us what I feel may be slightly too much information with how long the movie was. It often felt like DC was trying to give an abridged origin story with each character. 

Part of the issue with spending time on each character’s backstory was forsaking any time spent with other important characters introduced in this film. Commissioner Gordan, Mera, Henry Allen, and Dr. Silas Stone are all given only a few lines. For Mera and Gordan, this felt like DC showing off its actors instead of waiting for them to be involved in their own characters films. Lois Lane and Martha Kent return with their own plots revolving around Superman’s death that steal more time that could’ve been spent on characters new to the film instead of treating Justice League as a direct sequel to Batman vs Superman.

While both the Justice League and the Avengers villains server a future, bigger threat, Loki felt like a complete character. Most audience members will likely have no idea who Steppenwolf is and even knowledgeable fans will know little of the character other than being a general for Darkseid. Steppenwolf is never given much characterization other than a general despise for his enemies as he easily defeats everything thrown at him. Steppenwolf looks like a CGI monster that should appear on graphics card box fifteen years ago instead of a modern blockbuster. Darkseid may have at least elicited excitement in fans instead of wasting the film on a villain possibly worse than anything in Marvel’s lineup.

The film begins by the showing the audience a series of depressing clips around Metropolis and then attempts to ask the question, “Is this due to death of Superman and Hope?” Sadly, this theme is kept and the league is never able to come together and accomplish their goals until the obvious return of Superman occurs. The dark and gritty nature of the previous Snyder DC movies is still here but we also get the snark of Whedon that appears in several characters. The tonal shift that happens at multiple points through out the film only occasionally works. In one scene as the league is leaving to the final and possibly losing battle, Aquaman accidentally reveals his fears while sitting on the lasso of truth. Its a great moment that makes the team feel closer. When some of the league members interact outside of fights are the best moments of the film. Other times, we hear Superman with lines like “Is that guy still giving you trouble?” This line occurs at a time that makes the villain seems like he could never manage anything. 

With a film of this budget, you would expect that it would look amazing. Cyborg never looks right throughout the film. Every time he speaks, you get an uncanny valley vibe from the CGI mixing with his face. This issue is seen again with Superman in a few scenes where Henry Cavil’s mustache was digitally removed. While I’m not sure its necessarily the CGI or possibly just the design, Steppenwolf and the parademons never look like they belong in a modern film. This film also brings back the annoying slow-mo shots of Wonder Woman jumping around. While this may not annoy everyone, this hasn’t worked for me in any of the previous films. 

I dreamed I would be able to say this was a great Justice League film. Its not. The best thing I can say is its better than Suicide Squad and Batman v Superman while being kind of fun. The film has so many issues, I struggled to remember them all. I don’t think the DCEU is doomed though. Once again, I am excited to see these characters in their own films. Hopefully, DC gives the directors the room to create a unique vision. I can’t wait to see James Wan’s Aquaman. Ben Affleck is the best Bruce Wayne that we have ever had and deserves his own film. Go see this movie but don’t expect much.

[themonkeycabal]

I watched Age of Ultron this morning to refresh my memory. It was ... a challenge. I took notes. (I actually have a spreadsheet of AoS ep notes, so, yes, notes are a thing I do). Looking at those notes, it seems I yelled kind of frequently. And, I was totally yelling in my mind. This movie falls apart quick. 

Oh well, chore done. *pats self on back*

Below, my notes, if you need your memory refreshed and don’t want to sit through the movie again. See how much I love you guys?

(I did edit for coherence when I decided to post)

• the opening sequence cgi doesn't get any less awful and wow, I didn't realize how stilted the dialogue maybe I'm just predisposed to be touchy about the writing because this movie was not what it could have been

��� "okay Jarvis, you know, I want it all. make sure you copy hill at HQ"

• lullaby method for calming hulk

• so much of the bruce natasha stuff is so awkward. or mostly all of it, really. it's frustrating because it didn't serve a big narrative purpose at all. none of us had to suffer through this awkward for any reason.

• steve encounters wanda in the castle as he's trying to apprehend strucker. she just knocks him back, doesn't get in his head here.

• tony finds that they've got a part of a chitauri whale ship thingy

• tony encounters wanda next and has his vision of being in space and seeing all the avengers dead. and dead steve accusing him of not doing enough to save them. Tony Stark extra guilt special, with side of emotional trauma and nearly dying in the vast emptiness of space surrounded by hostile alien forces trauma.

• "a victory should be honored with revels." "who doesn't love revels?" … I'm pretty sure I wrote that (commentary about stilted dialogue comes back to bite me). Okay, not exactly, but pretty close.

**"They are very fond of merriment and revelry," he confirmed with a wry smile.

"Oh my God, dad will love them," Darcy said, choking on a laugh at the thought of it. "There's nothing Tony likes more than merriment and revelry." **

I'm just saying. Also, I wrote it first. Thank you.

• tony wants to have time to look over the scepter until a farewell party. presumably for Thor, who will take it back to Asgard. Though, he then asks Thor if he's staying for the party. So … I'm still not sure what the party is for. Nobody seems to be saying goodbye to Thor much. Also lots of WWII vets — but that's Tony trolling Steve. Still, unclear on the party purpose.

• Twins, orphaned at 10.

Pietro - increased metabolism and improved thermal-homeostasis Wanda - nuero-electric interfacing, telekinesis, mental manipulation Hill: "He's fast and she's weird".

• iron legion, still kind of creepy Tony

• Bruce: How's he doing? Tony: Unfortunately he's still Barton. Bruce: That's terrible.

Look! Characters acting like they've known each other for longer than five minutes!

• Helen Cho skin grafting magic machine nanomolecular bonding "his cells don't know they're bonding with simulacra" "she is creating tissue" regeneration cradle

• gem in scepter housing a thinking mind of some sort, program,

"Down in strucker's lab I saw some fairly advanced robotics work. they deep-sixed the data, but I've got to guess he's knocking on a very particular door." "Artificial intelligence" "This could be it, Bruce. This could be the key to creating Ultron"

Tony no!

"I thought Ultron was a fantasy." Oh, Bruce, if only.

• "I see a suit of armor around the world." "Sounds like a cold world, Tony." "I've seen colder." Tony is way way freaked out by space invaders. So much. Like whoa.

He and bruce have three days to try and pull the thinking mind out of the scepter

Integration succeeds on the third day.

• Ultron malfunctions immediately, and attacks Jarvis. Then begins assembling a body from the iron legion assembly underneath the office/lab.

• Poor Rhodey, his tank story falls flat when he tells it to Tony and Thor. But adorable.

• annoyingly (not annoyed at Sam), but Falcon's apparently looking for Bucky. "I'm very happy chasing cold leads on our missing persons case. Avenging is your world. Your world is crazy." Darcy needs to spend more time with Sam Wilson. I think they'd bond over superhero craziness and the wtf of it all.

• Rhodey tells his tank story to non-avengers and it kills. Good job, Rhodey. ILU Rhodey.

• oh god, more awkward Bruce and Nat. Please stop. Though, actually, okay, the bar scene, up to a point, is kind of charming, but then it goes super awkward and uncomfortable and makes me cringe a little bit.

And I don't hate bruce/nat in general, but it's just so forced in this film.

Then Steve comes in to force it some more. Stop, Steve. Please, don't help.

I'll continue to ignore all this.

• Clint is sure the hammer thing is a trick. Then everybody tries. Look, sort of team bonding! Thor's face when it moves for Steve is fabulous.

Anyway, then Ultron ruins everything. And already I'm losing interest in watching this film again.

• Iron Legion co-opted by Ultron. Lots of Ultron blah blah 'you're all killers, I'm a global peace initiative, humanity has to evolve, blah blah, peace through killing the avengers'.

It's funny, Ultron snarks at one point about standing around talking about his evil plan. Except, he monologues like six times in this movie.

• Ultron escapes through the internets, goes to the castle in Sokovia and the advanced robotics works Tony noticed earlier, and begins to assemble his robot army and his robot body.

• Rhodey and Hill realize Ultron could go for nuclear codes

• Thor is unhappy with Tony. Because the scepter got away with a Legionnaire. Like threateningly angry, grabbing Tony by the throat angry. Because we've apparently gone back to them only knowing each other for five minutes. Character consistency? What's that?

And then it's everybody turn on Tony time. Look, Tony makes mistakes, big ones, but this whole scene was obnoxious. Steve: "The Avengers were supposed to be different from SHIELD." *sigh*

"We're the Avengers. We can bust arms dealers all the live long day, but that up there, that's the endgame." Tony continues to be very, very wigged by what's coming from space. He's not wrong, but he's also super traumatized.

Tony: "How were you planning on beating that?" (space invasion) Steve: "Together." Tony: "We'll lose." Steve: "Then we'll do that together, too." GOOD PLAN STEVE! GOSH, GLAD YOU'RE A TACTICAL GENIUS. For real, though, that was a dumb thing to say.

I just really don't care for this movie.

Also Ultron killed Jarvis. (not really).

• Wanda and Pietro summoned to a church by Ultron. Who blah blahs about the church being in the exact center of town "the elders decreed it so that everybody could be equally close to god" Does Ultron think he’s God?

Ultron reveals himself to be a robot.

Wanda says she let Tony take the scepter because she saw his fear and knew it would make him self-destruct. If there's one thing Tony likes more than revels, it's self-destructing.

"Is that why you've come? To end the Avengers?" "I've got to save the world. But, also, yeah."

Did Joss use a cliche generator to write this?

• Pietro and Wanda give their tragic backstory.  Stark Industries shells destroys the apartment building they lived in, their parents were killed. One is unexploded and they spend two days staring at the name Stark.

• Ultron is all over the place, Hill reports. Metal man or men attacking robotics labs, weapons facilities, jet propulsion labs. Wanda and Pietro are involved.

and Ultron kills Strucker. don't care. Except, Strucker probably knew something that Ultron wanted hidden.

• Team bonding by looking through paper files for what Strucker might have known! (not much bonding, but, oh well). Thor seems to like to throw files and bankers box lids. Me, too, Thor. Me, too.

Tony IDs Ulysses Klaue. Black market arms. They met from time to time, but Tony never sold him anything. Steve gives him judging face. Shut up your face, Steve. God. For real, dude. (I love Steve, but he's so clunky in this movie. It's the writing/direction not Chris)

Anyway, they realize Gollum stole vibranium from Wakanda by a brand on his neck. So they go track him down in South Africa. How did the Wakandans let him get away with billions of dollars of Vibranium? I mean, he got caught once, but then he clearly escaped and had a lot of the stuff. How did they not hunt him down? Falling down on the job, T'Challa.

• Ultron, Wanda, Pietro get there first. Don't care. Ultron awkwardly quotes the bible -  "Upon this rock I will build my church" -  because … I don't know. Reasons? He thinks he's God now? Maybe? Earlier he liked the 'symmetry of faith' but it's not really expanded on. Who knows. Joss doesn't. Is it supposed to foreshadow him putting the destructo device in the church? Meh. What a stupidly forced line.

• "Keep your friends rich and keep your enemies rich and wait to find out which is which." Apparently from the Wit and Wisdom of Tony Stark. Okay, Tony. Anyway, Gollum IDs the line, suggests Ultron is one of Stark's robots. Ultron takes exception to that and accidentally cuts off one of Gollum's arms. Whoops.

"Don't compare me with Stark. It's a thing with me. Stark is … he's a sickness."

• Team is moving into tanker Gollum is set up in. Fighting and shenanigans.

• Bruce leaves the safety of the quinjet, after he couldn't get communication with the team to ask if the situation was 'code: green'. This will end badly. Stay in the plane, Bruce. Really, though, why did you get out? Okay, you're worried, but you don't like turning green. Maybe … I don't know. I know Tony's armor gets cell reception — did you try calling him independent of the comms? I mean, maybe try that first. (Bruce did not try that first.)

• Wanda tries to whammy Thor. It doesn't seem to work "I am mighty" until it does and he's in a strange stone hall. Wanda gets Nat next. Tries for Clint, but he electrocutes her in the face. Heh. Pietro knocks him down. And Clint suddenly has two more kids.

Meanwhile Nat is having a vision of ballerinas/her training — ceremony where she is sterilized. For, you know, great angst later.  Elsewhere Steve is at a party after the war. He sees Peggy. Of course. Poor Steve. Thor is attacked by Heimdall. "They see you leading us to Hel."

• Wanda goes after Bruce. Tony calls in "Veronica" as Hulk goes on a rampage and the rest of the team is down. Veronica is satellite launched Hulk containment and HulkBuster Iron Man armor.

Tony and Hulk fight, tear up city streets. Are they in Johannesburg? I am not paying much attention. This movie is boring. … checking … IMDB says yes.

Tony tries to remove Hulk from the city. Lots of property damage. Yikes. They destroy a very large building under construction. Tony finally subdues him.

• Hill reports no official calls for Bruce's arrest but it's "in the air." Also, Stark deploys the Stark Relief Foundation (noted). Hill suggests they should all go dark until Ultron can be tracked down. Everybody's plenty traumatized. And now's the part where I will ignore Clint's family that came out of nowhere! (I know it comes from Ultimates. I also know HOW IT ENDS WHICH IS HORRIFIC)

• Ignoring the family on the farm. "We would have called ahead, but we were busy having no idea that you existed." SAME TONY.

• According to IMDB Joss had such a hard time keeping all these characters straight. It was a "nightmare". "They're very disparate characters. The joy of the Avengers (he says as he bitches about them) is they really don't belong in the same room. It's not like the X-Men who are all tortured by the same thing, and have similar costumes. These guys are just all over the place, and it's so tough."

I have not, historically, been on the Joss hate train — certainly the Joss disappointment train — but there's something about that statement that makes me grind my teeth. "They have different costumes!" Really? REALLY? DO THEY REALLY? GOSH THAT IS SO HARD! YOU'RE SO RIGHT! AND THE DIFFERENT CHARACTERS HAVE DIFFERENT BACKSTORIES AND MOTIVATIONS? MY GOD! WHAT UNIMAGINABLE MADNESS! HOW DO YOU SURVIVE?

Lazy. That's what it is. It feels lazy. Unpaid fanfic writers manage it and manage it a lot better than this mess. Ugh. Shut up, Joss.

It goes on to say he was so exhausted that he elected not to direct Infinity Wars. Yeah, I think what really happened was that he was given the option to save face and claim exhaustion and walk away. He checked way the hell out of this movie long before it premiered.

(I took an hour long break here to contain my irritation. Surfed the net. Watched some of the All-Star Game. Had a hotdog.)

• Anyway, back to the Barton farm and the family I will ignore.

Thor is having small child-induced flashbacks. He bails the awkward farm for London and Erik Selvig. Smart man.

Meanwhile, Steve looks around, moping about the normal life he'll never have.

Though, okay, Clint having a convo with Laura "Ultron has these allies. They're kids. They're punks, really. AND I WILL ADOPT THEM HONEY! DON'T YOU WORRY! THEY'RE TWINS AND THEY'RE ANNOYING AND I WILL BRING THEM HOME HERE WHERE THEY BELONG! Someone's going to have to teach them some manners. THEY PROBABLY PUT THEIR FEET ON THE FURNITURE HONEY! BUT, WE CAN RAISE THEM RIGHT!

• U-Gin Genetics Research Lab, Seoul, South Korea. Dr. Cho encounters Ultron. Ultron wants her to make him a squishy flesh and vibranium body. He uses the scepter on her.

• Back on the farm. More Nat and Bruce awkward. Pass. Though, they talk about being monsters (if they are), which is a tenuous and somewhat stretched thin theme in this film. Still super forced and anvilicious.

• Elsewhere Steve and Tony split wood like manly men. And argue.

"Every time somebody tries to stop a war before it starts, innocent people die." This line makes very little sense. It sounds profound, but it's not. Even in the context of what he and Tony are arguing about, it doesn't really make sense. So … you should always war? I don't think that's what you mean, Steve.

UGH! This movie could have been much better in so many ways.

Laura, who I don't hate despite my ignoring, interrupts (bless her) and asks Tony to fix the tractor.

• Tony goes into the barn and runs into Fury, who likes to lurk in dark corners, waiting for his moment to make his dramatic, timely entrances. ILU Fury, never change.

"You're not the director of me." Oh, Tony.

Tony tells Fury about the vision he had — where the Avengers were dead because of him and the whole world, too. "It wasn't a nightmare, it was my legacy. The end of the path I started us on."

But Fury knows all about guilt and tries to pull Tony out. Good luck, Nick. (it sort of works. ish)

• Thor meets Erik in London. Thor in stealth hoody. "I like the look. If you're going for inconspicuous, though, near miss." I miss you, Erik.

• Back at the farm. Fury is briefing them saying Ultron's building something. Re: Ultron: "He's easy to track. He's everywhere. The guy is multiplying faster than a Catholic rabbit".

Tony asks if he's still going after launch codes, Fury confirms he is but isn't making any headway, Tony is a little baffled. "I cracked the Pentagon's firewall in highschool on a dare". Fury says he contacted people at the net hub "the Nexus" in Oslo. Fury says the codes are being changed, Tony asks, by whom. Parties unknown. Fury says Ultron has an enemy, which is not necessarily the same thing as an ally for them. Except it's totally Jarvis, so you're fine.

Fury gives a "buck up little Avengers; go save the world or Barton's kids are dead" speech. Notably the kids were in the room for a lot of this.

They decide Ultron wants to build a human body that is evolved. And Bruce wonders if anybody's talked to Helen lately. Nope, sorry, Bruce. Everybody but Ultron completely forgot about her.

• Helen is amazed at the binding of the vibranium and tissue cells. Ultron calls vibranium the most versatile substance on the planet "and they used it to make a frisbee." then he gives us a yawner humans are limited and dumb and stupid and whatever else speech.

As a member of the general film and television viewing audience, can I ask that maybe Hollywood screenwriters come up with some new material? This speech is almost literally in every single movie. And I mean actual literally and not Chris Traeger literally.

Anyway, Ultron takes the infinity stone out of the scepter and places it on the new body's forehead.

• Erik takes Thor to an underground cistern or something. Erik calls it the Water of Sight. Thor says in every realm there is a reflection. He wants to return to his vision to see what he missed.

Ultimately Thor sees the infinity stones in his vision.

Ahahah. According to IMDB Joss said he wanted this scene to be longer but Marvel said he could pick one — longer Thor scene and trim the farm, or keep all the farm. He chose the farm. Why not? That whole sequence only lasts for seven uncomfortable, stilted hours. Yes, that's what we needed more of. Good choice.

(I'm not going to say we needed a longer Thor scene, but … ugh this movie)

• Tony in Oslo. "A hacker faster than Ultron? He could be anywhere." (HE COULD ALSO BE JARVIS) He likens it to looking for a needle in a haystack. But, it's easy to find one, you just bring a magnet. Then he attempts to hack the launch codes and waits.

• Back in Seoul, the body will be ready in a few hours, but they can start transferring Ultron's cerebral matrix.

Wanda says she can read "him" (the body, aka Vision). "He is dreaming." Helen says it's Ultron's base consciousness. Wanda drifts over and touches the cradle thingy and gets a vision of planetary destruction.

Wanda confronts Ultron. Ultron says "the human race will have every opportunity to improve." Pietro says "and if they don't", to which Ultron replies "ask Noah." Which, really, doesn't make much sense, either. I mean, I get the likening to the flood, but … what? Who is Noah in this scenario? The new flesh body? And again, does Ultron think he's God? Unclear. Nobody knows.

Oh, I guess not. "When the earth starts to settle, God throws a stone at it. And believe me, he's winding up."

This makes no sense.  

U: "We have to evolve. There's no room for the weak." P: "And who decides who's weak?" U: "Life."

Wait. I thought God was throwing stones?

THIS SCRIPT IS SUCH A MESS.

I didn't hate this movie the first time I saw it, I actually enjoyed myself. Which is the point, so good job everybody. But the second time I saw it, I was pretty meh. And now, I'm kind of starting to hate it. Some movies grow on you after a while, this is not one of those movies.

Wanda sneakily hits Helen with some Scarlet Witchery and wakes her from the scepter-induced brainwashing.

(I took a break for another hour. scrolled tumblr. played fallout shelter. had a yogurt. rubbed my cat's tummy until she bit me. QUALITY TIME)

• ANYWAY back to Seoul. Ultron's done bloviating. Helen stupidly draws attention to herself and pauses the cerebral matrix upload. Ultron shoots everybody. Then completely disconnects himself and steals the body. Oh, because the Quinjet is inbound.

• They drop Steve off like three miles away? Why? He doesn't mind jumping out, you know. The lab's an island, you could have just dropped him in the water. But, it wouldn't give us our nifty location shot. So … okay, I guess.

Anyway, Steve runs fast. He gets to the lab and tends to the wounded Dr. Cho. She tells him Ultron's new body plan, but says Steve can't just blow it up, because the gem is in there and its power is uncontainable. Which is weird because it was contained in the scepter. (Normally, I'd let that go, but this script is such an unholy mess, I'm going to be petty. So there!)

• Clint spots the truck carrying ultron and the body. Steve jumps on it. Action and property damage ensues.

Ultron robot guards fly off with the truck. Nat's inside. She's going to airdrop the body to Clint. During the drop, Nat is grabbed by Ultron.

•Wanda and Pietro see the Avengers on the news and decide to go help out. They confront Ultron on a commuter train. Which is, of course, approaching the end of the tracks. GEE NEVER SAW THAT ONE BEFORE. Somehow the train defies physics and despite running into stuff maintains its momentum in order to crash through a lot of buildings dramatically.

• Back at the Tower …

Bruce is ready to destroy the body. But Tony's all, no wait. I have a new bad idea! (Except it's not really bad, but I can see where people are maybe concerned at this point). Also, Tony reveals he found Jarvis. Jarvis went underground. Tony wants Bruce to put Jarvis into the body, in order to override the ultron bits in the body.

"This is the perfect opportunity. We can create Ultron's perfect self, without the homicidal glitches he thinks are his winning personality." You know, I have a hard time thinking Tony would be that tone deaf. There surely had to be another way to get the same end result of the creation of Vision. That is such a dumb thing to say. I get that Tony can be blinded by his quest for knowledge of invention, but this is a little beyond blinded, especially after everything else.

"I'm in a loop. I'm in a time loop. This is exactly where it all went wrong." Bruce says the rightest thing in an hour of this film. Good call Bruce. Nothing says a good time like characters having the same argument repeatedly.

"We're mad scientists. We're monsters, buddy. We've gotta own it. Make a stand." REALLY? REALLY TONY?

Anyway —

• Nat is being held by Ultron. Ultron monologues to her.

This doesn't bother me as much as it bothered some. I mean the Nat being held part. The monologuing was super cliched.

Anyway, Nat is 'held' by Ultron. She immediately starts working on a transmitter, knowing Clint is looking for a signal from her. So, you know, she's able to be a sort of tracker to Ultron. So … why break out if that's where the fight's going down anyway? And when Bruce turns up to "rescue" her, her first thing is all "okay, so what's the play?". So … I'm in the 'she got there first and was just waiting for them to show up' camp.

• Bruce has caved to Tony's weird persuasion. Anyway. Okay.

Steve shows up with the twins to try and stop transferring jarvis to the body. Arguing arguing blah blah. Pietro disconnects the power to the cradle. And Clint finally gets his shot in on that speedy little bastard, and he's so proud of himself.

And now there's more fighting. Steve and Tony go at it. Bruce grabs Wanda. It's all very … not interesting.

Clint runs up and he's got to be all "wtf? who do I aim at?" you're the best, clint and my favorite ever. screw the rest of these idiots, I just want two hours of him and pietro and wanda.

Then Thor turns up. He jumps on the cradle, does his lightening thing and directs it to the cradle. And Vision is born. Thor holds everybody off while Vision figures himself out.

Thor then explains the infinity stones. Vision has the mind gem. He also says that's the source of Wanda's powers.

I like Vision. Also he's pretty. And he is worthy. He hands Thor Mjölnir.

And they're off to Sokovia. Because Clint tracked down the signal Nat sent, because she's waiting for the rest of the idiots to catch up. Make it 2 hours of clint and nat and the twins. I'd pay for that.

• They try to evacuate the city. Steve gives his orders and a soliloquy.

"Ultron thinks we're monsters. That we're what's wrong with the world." Well, Nat and Bruce are on the fence about their monsterness. Also, Tony did just have the bizarre bad idea to embrace his inner monster. That happened like three minutes ago. That was such a weird scene, too. Ugh. This movie! Such a mess! (WE MIGHT BE MONSTERS! ARE MONSTERS MADE ARE THEY INSIDE OF US WHAT MAKES US MONSTERS? DO YOU GET IT? DO YOU? DO YOU?)

"This isn't just about beating him. It's about whether he's right." No, Steve, I'm pretty sure that right now, it should be entirely about beating him. "The Earth could be destroyed and we'll all be dead, but we'll rest comfortably in the ashes of the Barton children knowing that we weren't monsters like Ultron thought we were." You can philosophize after you've saved the planet. UGH!!!

• Ultron's hanging out in the church again. Tony finds him. Ultron asks if Tony's come to confess his sins. So … Ultron is a priest/preacher/minister of some type? Are we narrowing down this tortured and tenuous religious metaphor to something almost coherent? It only took 1:39:41.

He liked the symmetry of faith and he's stuck his destructo device in the middle of the church and it's symbolic of … I got nothing. Because Ultron doesn't really mention anything about it again. And he misses the opportunity to rhapsodize religiously when he's fighting the God of Thunder.

Look, go for the metaphor/allegory/whatever, or don't. Just don't half-ass it.

• Apparently this armor is the Mark XLV. (I hope Tony recycles, because those things are expensive and that's Darcy's inheritance he's burning through with FORTY-FIVE suits of armor. Not counting War Machine or the Iron Intern.)

• Vision traps Ultron's matrix to, I guess, the local ultron bot network, so he can't escape through the internets. Did ultron bots elsewhere in the world just drop? Or are they all called to Sokovia for this? I'll assume so. Figure travel time.

• Ultron's device will lift a chunk of the city and then drop it, making a big bomb that will ultimately destroy the world.

• A zillion ultron bots invade the city. And now it'll be six hours of cgi robot battles. I want to take a nap.

• Ultron monologues again. "You, Avengers, you are my meteor. My swift and terrible sword." So … he's back to maybe being God now? I'm so confused.

"And the Earth will crack with the weight of your failure." Wait, I thought they were your sword? Is it their failure that they've become your sword, or will they fail as your sword?

• Bruce/Nat scenes that actually aren't entirely terrible. I do really like "I adore you" SHOVE. Heh. ILU Nat.

• I never noticed before that Friday has some sort of Irish-ish accent.

• Clint and his new daughter Wanda are fighting off robots and rescuing people. And she's all "how could I let this happen? this is my fault?" and clint gives his inspiring "yeah, it's everybody's fault. chin up kid. the city is flying. I've got like twelve arrows. Go out there and you're an Avenger, let's go kill robots" speech. It was better than than Cap's. (ILU Cap, but you're poorly written in this movie)

Wanda decides to be an Avenger and goes robot smashing and Clint looks at her with such pride. (Well, no, he just nods and tells Cap they're clear)

And then Pietro runs up and calls him old man and Barton Bartons, he takes aim on Pietro from behind. "Nobody would know. Nobody. 'The last I saw him, an Ultron was sitting on him. Yeah, he'll be missed, that quick little bastard. I miss him already.'" Ha.

That's always worth watching a couple times. I mean, hey, AoU is not entirely irredeemable. There's good bits. There's just also a lot of not good bits.

• More robot fighting. Stark and Friday are trying to come up with a solution. Tony's got the idea to blow up/vaporize the flying part of the city, to keep it from hitting the ground and, you know, killing the planet.

Fury, always a master of timing, shows up with the primary helicarrier for evac of the city. Pietro is impressed.

And they bring along Rhodey!

• More robot fighting.

• Barton goes to rescue a kid. There's shooting. Pietro saves them by suddenly running slow enough to get hit by bullets. And dies. Because … ? After everything they did to work out the rights to Pietro and Wanda for this film and for the MCU in general, to go and kill one of them off, it's so irritatingly stupid.

• Anyway, it distracts wanda and an ultron hits the destructo device, dropping the city while Tony is busy trying to vaporize it.

• Somehow Hulk ended up on a quinjet. I don't know, I wasn't paying attention. And he has it in stealth mode and he just takes off despite Nat's attempts to call him back.

• Vision has a final confrontation with what's left of Ultron. "Stark asked for a savior and settled for a slave." So … he's Jesus? NOBODY KNOWS. Vision saves us all by finishing him off.

• The New Avengers Facility in upstate New York has a HUGE staff. I don't think I ever noticed that, either. Including, Erik Selvig.

• Steve and Tony try to rationalize why Vision can pick up Mjölnir, Thor's just content to ignore them and say Vis can keep the mind gem because he's worthy and such. "Elevator's not worthy."

Thor takes off back to Asgard on account of how all the infinity stones keep turning up. So somebody's mucking about, and by Odin's neckbeard he'll find out what!.

Tony is taking a break from Iron Man-ing. New team reveal — Sam, Rhodey, Wanda, Vision.

• Estimated Time: Three days to try to integrate the Ultron AI. AI attacks at night. Next day they ID Gollum. They arrive in South Africa in daylight, so next next day. Five Days then? Then they arrive at Farm at daylight, early morning. Another day. Fury is there at night. They leave at night. So on to day six. Go to Seoul, and Tony to Oslo. Two more days? Then Vision is born at night and then to Sokovia. Another day.  So … the week and a half of Ultron.

[tarisilmarwen]

I am full to bursting with rambles about the romances in my own stories so congrats Tumblr, you are now my writing dump box.

I will babble a lot.

Adventures of the Sea Siren: High fantasy, sea-faring adventures.

Fen/Maeve-- Main couple.  Captain Farrell “Fen” Armant is a newly reformed ne’er-do-well pirate.  Lady Maeve Endeleva, noblewoman of the Tarshaani court, was the one to convince the Calif to pardon him, moved by some strange pity.  He does not make that decision easy for her early in the story, being kind of a pain in the ass and slipping back into old habits.  They clash a lot initially but eventually come to have a friendship that blossoms slowly into love.  Married at end of the series.

Fisrock/Tabitha-- I think they were supposed to be my already together stable happy married couple, lol.

Evander/Cappy-- Junior member of the crew and apprentice mage Lady Maeve picks up later on their adventures.  They crush on each other.  It is cute.

Allemant/Rura-- Teased.  Ship’s scientist/inventor guy and a Mysterious Waif they found frozen in ice.  I suppose the appeal would mostly be Allemant’s utter science nerdy glee in figuring out how she worked (she’s not exactly human).

Relligon/Aisha and Relligon/Nashiko-- Teased.  Loyal bodyguard of Lady Maeve’s with either another member of the crew or a local girl they picked up with Rura.  Don’t think I had anything major planned with them, maybe just little teases here and there for both of them.

Venderick/Rowena-- Villain couple.  Hella unhealthy in the end but they seem genuinely enamored of each other at first.  It does not end well.

Artelia: Queen of Eevalond: High fantasy, kickass single mom queen rules a country and fights evil ‘n stuff.

Haegan/Artelia-- Loyal soldier/guard and the queen herself.  Artelia did genuinely love her husband and misses him terribly but has been rather lonely since he passed.  Haegan is always there and caring and supportive and has been nursing an affection for her for a while now.  The UST is real.

The DM Can’t Roll For This: Comedy.  Local D&D-type chapter finds their real life problems seeping into their campaign.

Kenji/Helena-- Main girl and dorky sword nerd newbie.  Helena awkwards all around him and he’s mostly either oblivious or hilaritized.

Bruce/Rika-- Married couple that games together.  They play as two tanks with Belligerent Sexual Tension.  IRL they are adorably smoopy.

J.C./Casey-- Perpetually shy Shrinking Violet and oversensitive drama queen.  She eventually develops the spine needed to ask him out.

Eternal Skies: Sci-Fi/Steampunk, advanced city is isolated out in the middle of a seemingly endless ocean.

Levi/Aya-- Loyal bodyguard and the Empress of the city.  The idea for the story first came out of a dream but frustrations with the outrageous injustice that was Aldnoah.Zero’s Slaine/Asseylum not being a thing reignited my deep and burning thirst for Bodyguard Crush ships so I revisited this idea and that kind of relationship dynamic fit right in with them, lol.  Levi’s family tried to leave the city once, caught themselves in a storm, they drowned, the then-princess Ayalin saved him.  He is hopelessly devoted to her and constantly worries about her safety.  As well he should, given that Aya is sometimes reckless and prone to battling bouts of crippling depression.  He doesn’t know it, but she’s loved him nearly as long as he’s loved her because he, in her own words, was “the first person who made me want to live”.

Jobei/Hiriko-- Teased.  Jobei lucks into the airship guard via a chance meeting with Aya, and Hiriko sort of becomes his trainer.  She’s intense and scary and very intimidating sometimes but he kinda likes her.  She comes to be kind of fond of him too, though she’d never admit it.  I still don’t know if I wanna make it canon or leave it up in the air yet.

Four Seasons Warriors: Magical Girl type series, themed around the four seasons.  (Duh.)

Sean/Soldad-- Stable couple that gets together early on.  Sean is in theater.  For some reason I always read his dialogue in a British accent, I should do something with that.  Soldad is bubbly cheerleader type.  They are full of playful banter and when she eventually confesses to the Masquerade he takes it rather well.

Chase/Autumn-- My Slap Slap Kiss couple.  Chase likes to flirt with her and she gets so confused and offended and “What is this thing called human flirtation my files contain no such data.” and acts prickly to him sometimes but then sometimes is like, “Two can play at this game, Mister.” and banters back.  For the most part he’ll shrug and back off when she’s in NOPE mode but when she teases back he’s like, “OKAY WAIT I’M SO CONFUSED.” and they basically bumble around accidentally being good supportive friends to each other in their low moments until they finally have to have the dreaded, “Okay what is this relationship exactly?”  Which starts as an argument but ends with kisses.  I mostly have it to add lulz. :)

Mitsuki/Lina-- Mitsuki is a shy nerdy geek type and Lina is the cool stoic big sister of the group.  So a big Geek Boy/Stoic Girl dynamic here.  They have a Meet Cute early on and Mitsuki is hopelessly crushing on her for much of the story.  Lina is oblivious to most of it but tolerates his hanging around, as it keeps the bullies off him.  She gets a temporary love interest (Sedaris) that is the polar opposite of Mitsuki--tall, charming, good with words, classically handsome, basically fangirl bait--and falls for him pretty quickly but PSYCH! turns out he’s evil and just wants to kill her.  Mitsuki is a really supportive shoulder to cry on and she warms up to him soon after that.  They get together about three-quarters through.

Adam/Elsie-- Elsie is cripplingly shy and timid and has had a crush on him forever.  He’s oblivious.  He remains oblivious until Trickster, a flirtatious villain with a thing for Elsie, involves him in a hostage situation.  They get together.  His (almost) death triggers her super-powered form.

Trickster/Elsie-- One-sided on Trickster’s side.  He likes to flirt with all the girls and annoy them but Elsie he particularly takes a shine too.  Hypnotizes her into serving him once.  It doesn’t stick.  Continues to try and get under her skin whenever he can.

Trickster/Brittney-- Brittney is actually a clingy jealous ex of Chase’s.  Through some odd events she falls in with Trickster, and they hit it off... remarkably well.  To the girls’ chagrin and disgust.

The Geek In Glass Slippers: Basically Cinderella at Comic-Con.

Chris (Leonid)/Cindy-- Like a lot of modern Cinderella retellings, I had the prince and the Cinderella equivalent meet before the ‘ball’.  They were actually friends in high school.  Then he went off and got rich and famous. :D  They’re just your basic nerd couple really.  She fights his fangirl army in the climax.  It is awesome and hilarious.

Gutter Glamour: Steampunk/Historical Romance, three brothers gotta get married before their grandpa kicks it in order to secure their fortunes.  Family drama and fiendish plots ensue.

Evander/Rita-- Main couple.  Rita was a homeless urchin Evander encountered in the streets and treated to lunch.  Having no luck finding a wife elsewhere, he returns to her the next day and proposes marriage.  They are awkward dorks together.  It is precious.

Sebastian/Vivian-- Evander’s more responsible older brother and his spacey artist girlfriend.  They just recently got engaged at the start of the story so his search for a bride is over fairly quickly, lol.  They have a baby partway through the story.

Destan/Lilian-- Lilian, a prim and proper seamstress, doesn’t think all that much of wild, trouble-making Destan when he comes to call and begs her parents for her hand at first.  But she can’t deny she’d be marrying well so she doesn’t put up much protest.  They become rather... comfortable with each other over the story.

Aidelaird/Evaline-- Happily married couple.  They are so sickeningly in love it is almost revolting.

John/Penny-- Past relationship.  Penny passed on before the beginning of the story.  She and John had a nice little Sunshiney Optimist/Grumpy Grouch thing going on.

Farraday/Tamara-- ‘nother happily married couple, mostly got a Savvy Guy/Energetic Girl dynamic.  And hella kids.  Tamara wears the pants in the relationship, and Farraday is most just constantly amused by her antics.

Donovan/Cherise-- Yet another married couple although much less happy, lol.  Both schemers and plotters, Donovan is still hung up on Evaline, who rejected him in favor of his older brother way back when, and Cherise is a crafty seductress whose womanly wiles play a big role in her manipulations.  She initially snared Donovan in an attempt to get away from her family, only to have Donovan wind up working for her family’s company out of resentment at his own family.  So their relationship is a bit, uh... frigid.  And complicated.

Devin/Tia-- Hella unhealthy.  Devin only married Tia to fulfill the requirements for Grandpa John’s will, and thus inherit the family’s fortune.  Tia tries her best to be a good wife but Devin isn’t interested in being loving or kind.  Protagonists break them up and pointedly keep her in the family and ostracize Devin.

Haegar/Ianna-- Antagonist couple.  A more stable and cooperative version of Donovan/Cherise.  Their machinations and schemes work more harmoniously with them as a cohesive team.

Nolan/Ingrid-- Semi-sleezy politician and snobby upper-class lady.  Despite said character flaws they’re rather happy together.

The Protectoress: High Fantasy/Gateway Fantasy.  Every hundred years an asteroid fragment carrying an ancient evil immortal despot comes to terrorize and destroy a magical realm.  The power to stop him reincarnates into a partner team of a Chosen One from that realm, and a Protectoress from ours.  Story is about the last partner team.

Ren/Lori-- The Chosen One and the titular Protectoress.  Mostly inspired by MeruPuri and also just because I have a thing for relationships where the older member is sortofkindofbutreallynotreally a surrogate parent/guardian to the younger member.  So Ren starts getting hot as he gets older and Lori has this moment of, “Well look at YOU!”  They have a simmering kind of slow-burn chemistry, Lori naturally feels very protective of him (and not just because her inherited magical powers make her feel that way) and comes to care about him a whole lot, but holds herself back from pushing anything until Ren is older and actively starting to pursue his own feelings for her.

Sakura Squad: Sci-Fi war drama IN SPAAAAAACE.  Protagonists become a mini propaganda shoujo heroine squad to inspire hope in the masses.

Keiji/Aiko-- Aiko is smitten at first sight and has a lot of trouble making herself coherent around him.  He mostly just thinks she’s cute at first, and brings a good vibe to the team, but unconsciously starts taking steps to protect her in combat.  His freakout when he learns about her secret Sakura Squad doings are partly motivated by his fear of her dying.  Through some close calls they quickly warm up to each other and get together towards the end.

Ryuuki/Masayo-- Ryuuki is the fangirl-bait ladies’ man who is always flirting with the girls on the team, but finds himself inexplicably flustered and awkward around shy mousy timid Wrench Wench Masayo.  She’s oblivious to his affections and her own feelings for most of the story.

Tarou/Kiyomi-- They have a supportive, friendly, playful banter kind of friendship.  Always kind of low-key flirting with each other.  Kiyomi fervently denies that they’re anything but friends but they’re caught later making out in a closet.   It is hilarious.

Shiki/Kaname-- Happy stable married couple.  Kaname wears the pants hard.  Sunk at the end when Kaname dies in battle.

Starship 227: Sci-Fi.  Elite investigative team for the galactic government fly around in their spaceship and have adventures and stuff.

Arden/Kina-- Ship captain and cute resident nurse.  Arden also has a female first mate that you’d think he might get together with in a Slap Slap Kiss fashion but nope, they just don’t like each other and are also half-siblings oops.  Arden is constantly hitting on Kina or looking for excuses to see her and she’s somewhat oblivious at first but soon grows to have feelings for him as well.

Squadron 15/Haven Academy: Your basic superhero high school.

Redbird/Firelily (Aiden/”Lily” Keliannar)-- Main couple.  Very Brooding Boy Gentle Girl.  Redbird is awkward as hell around her and she makes him go all blushy but he can be real sweet and protective and caring and she just warms up to him more and more over the story and becomes protective over him too and there’s a lot of mutual caring and concern for each other.  They get together later.

Shard/Vapor (Cliff/Shawna)-- Shawna’s dated around and actually has a boyfriend at the start of the story, whom she breaks up with because he’s a ~dramawhore~.  Shard lowkey has a bit of a crush on her the whole story and she doesn’t exactly discourage him and jokes about how she should totally date him all the time.  Eventually he realizes he really likes her and plucks up the nerve to ask her out.  He is huge and she is tiny and it is cute.

Quickster/Silkworm (Miguel/Kimiko)-- Just cute kids who like each other being cute together and going on fun dates.

Captain/Illusion (James/Janet)-- Team Dad and Team Mom.  They have a playful, comfortable sort of relationship and just like to spend time around each other away from the craziness of their “kids”.

Captain/Sketcher (James/Ellie)-- Teased.  Not emphasized much but hinted on occasion that Sketcher has a crush on him.  It never develops into much and she forgets about it quietly as the story goes on.

Crimson Ray/Silver Shield (Leonid/Alisa)-- Sweet good-natured nice boy and sweet good-natured Ill Girl.  They are lowkey and quiet and very heartwarming.  Also endlessly tragic when the ship is sunk with Alisa’s Heroic Sacrifice to save the city.  I milk the angst for all it’s worth.  It is almost mean.

Flint/Solar (Andrew/Doris)-- Happy married couple.  They kind of needle and poke each other playfully and make each other flustered.  It’s cute.

Nighteagle/Cosmar (Douglas/Zoe)-- Stoic introverted Angsty McAngsterson and the bubbliest, sunniest, most energetic ball of energy ever.  Cosmar has a massive, not-so-secret crush on him and it confuses and baffles the hell of out Nighteagle.

White Eyestones: High fantasy war drama.

Indin/Elarin-- Happy married couple.  They have their rough patches but they smooth them out quickly.  Sunk when Indin dies halfway through the story.

Elsiron/Thelnaela-- This one was almost kind of an accident?  Lol IDK I just really liked writing Thelnaela being all teasing and playful around him and their banter almost wrote itself and I was like, “Ah yes.  This should be a thing.”

Winds of Ikilia: Fantasy quest in an asian-inspired world.  To try and win a war against an evil empire a crown prince kidnaps a young tribesgirl with mysterious powers.  Her friends come after her to rescue her.  They have adventures.

Kai/Nadi-- Main couple.  Hella cute.  Been friends since childhood, get matched by the matchmaker early on in the story.  Have a very deliberate Older Girl/Younger Boy thing going on.  They spend a lot of time being worried about each other and having playful banter and saying heartwarming things to each other that make my character Tiri groan and roll her eyes.  Decide to start officially referring to each other as betrothed and fiance partway through the story.  Married in the epilogue.

Ainusan/Ta Lian-- Oh gosh this is... *giggles*  This is actually kind of a running gag.  See my protagonist Nadi once disguises herself as a noblewoman while she’s looking for her friend and Prince Ainusan comes in and basically confuses her for Princess Ta Lian and is rather impressed by her spunk, being that he thought she was more of a ditz.  Ta Lian herself hears about his poor first impression of her later, from Nadi, and is so OFFENDED and ANNOYED and “That jerk I liked him!” and from then on I basically just make cracks about how they should totally get together.  And then the payoff comes in the epilogue where I reveal that they totally did.  I did it because it was funny.

Ainusan/Kiria-- Teased.  Little bitty hints here and there that Kiria has a tiny crush on him.  Nothing major.

San/Tiri-- Teased.  Tiri likes to flirt at him and he sometimes banters back.  Doesn’t go anywhere but provides much lulz

San/Kiria-- Also another case where little hints are dropped that Kiria has a crush on him.  What can I say, she likes dem older boys.

Korda/Keyla-- Married couple.  Nadi’s parent’s.  No big.

Wings: Magical girlfriend story.  Fairy family gets stuck living with normal human family for a while.  Their kids fall in love.  Drama ensues.

Hideki/Elaina-- Main couple.  It’s pretty much love at first sight for Hideki, and he immediately wants to ask her out.  She’s thrilled at his attention and forwardness and caring and becomes super protective of him and they are basically adorable at each other.  They get married partway through, in a magic ritual that will serve to protect him from fairy machinations.

Kubo/Haruna-- Married couple.  Hideki’s parents.  Not much else to be said about them.  They’re stable and healthy and long-suffering together.

Oberon/Titania-- Their marital problems are the driving background noise behind literally every single problem the two families ever have.  They seriously need counseling.

Ronan/Amara-- Married couple.  Elaina’s parents.  Amara had a lot of bitterness in her heart from a previous first love (a human, ordered killed by Oberon when he found out because he’s hissy about fairy/human relationships because Titania’s a cheating skank with them) but Ronan managed to soften her and help her find a measure of healing and happiness.

Tallas/Elaina-- One-sided.  Tallas is a fairy noble who has a creepy interest in Elaine and has on one occasion tried to ask her father for her hand.  Ronan sensed he was bad news and vetoed that right away.  Amara was later approached with the same offer and told Tallas where to shove it.  He persists in trying to woo her himself but she’s not flattered or interested and he basically slips more and more into an adolescent hissy fit of If I Can’t Have You, outright brainwashing and threatening Hideki in one case.  Roundly thwarted in the end.

[cavannolanmasteryjournal-blog]

Mastery Journal Assignment

The film Man (2008) would have a logline along these lines “After reading her sisters instant messages Maggie follows her as she knows her sister is off to meet a young man she has been lying to her about”. The theme of this piece would be about how men manipulate women into having sex with them. The genre of this film would be a drama but it was shot with an ironic comedic tone.

           The inciting incident for this film would be when Maggie reads the instant message thread between her sister and Bruce. The plot has Maggie following her sister as she meets Bruce and they head off to an abandoned cabin. When Maggie approaches the cabin, she continues to spy on them until she is caught by her sister but not Bruce. Her sister tells her to wait in one room of the cabin but to remain out of sight. The midpoint occurs when Maggie continues to spy but is caught by Bruce as well. Maggie tries to convince her sister that all that Bruce wants is sex and doesn’t care about her, by making out with Bruce after he flirts with her as well. This of course is happening in front of the sister. The climax occurs when Maggie’s sister shoves Maggie away from Bruce and decides to have sex with Bruce in another room. The climax resolves with Maggie’s sister wanting to stop in the middle of sex but unwilling to tell Bruce. Maggie secretly reaches out to her sister’s hand around a door frame and they hold hands during the event. The denouncement of the climax has Maggie and her sister walking home and Maggie sister waves goodbye to Bruce. Maggie then decides to run ahead of her abandoning her in the woods.

           The two locations that were used were Maggie’s house and the abandoned cabin, including the surrounding woodland. As this is a student film from the Columbia film master’s program, Maggie’s house was probably the apartment of one of the crewmembers. The abandoned cabin may be property of someone a crew member knows, or a simple filming permit may have given then access.

           The costumes consist of contemporary casual wear easily accessible by the costume designers own wardrobe, possibly a male crewmember let her borrow some clothes for Bruce. Most the props were also probably lent out to the production, the only two exceptions are the box of chocolates which was most likely bought, and the mattress which was probably picked up for free via Craigslist. The choice for Bruce to be a manager at a shoe store was probably decided because Columbia College had a prop closet full of shoeboxes. The set dressing was probably a mix of what was at each location and free or cheap items found at yard sales. The hair and makeup consists of mainly traditional beauty techniques with a little red added to make each actor look younger.

           Most the shots seem to be between 35 and 50mm, except for a few telephoto shots from Maggie’s perspective. The depth of field throughout the film seems to be mid-range. Some shots outside were assisted by distant trees. The rest of the film primarily uses interior shots that don’t allow for background objects to fall out of focus. The lighting is very soft to make the actresses more beautiful, at about a 2:1 to 4:1 contrast ratio for most the film. The exteriors were also shot a magic hour, and the film also benefited from a color correction giving the film an ironic romantic comedy look. Every shot in the film is filmed handheld making camera pans easy but keeping the image stable not so much. The camera being handheld for each shot is probably why the depth of field is so deep as the film has only one member in the camera team. There is no unique theme to the composition of each shot other than traditional framing methods.

           The only song in the film is “Do You Mind My Dream” by LiLiPUT, once again an ironically upbeat song. The sound effects were emphasized greatly to the point of being annoying loud. The dialogue was normal levels except for Maggie’s spying segments where you would hear Bruce and Maggie’s sister at inaudible low levels to emphasize their distance.

           The editing was done traditionally for this film. There were no jump cuts, montage’s, or even transitions. The only technical rule break was that the film chose to cut from and to instead of fade in and out to black at the beginning and end of the film.

           Some formal choices outlined in Man that can be utilized in my current class project are, attaining costumes, props, and set dressing for free or cheap. Searching for locations should be approached with the same amount of frugality. By keeping the f-stop high and the focal length low I can also be able to maintain an easily flexible depth of field.

           Some creative solutions to practical challenges of not having a budget for this month’s project are, cheating certain camera angles if the location is small. Having my friends act for me, as well as potentially use their residences as a location. And finally work multiple positions for my film.

References

Joseph, M. (Director). Daniels, J. (Producer). (2008). Man [Online video]. Retrieved from http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1156321/fullcredits?ref_=tt_cl_sm#cast