#Bruce as a new parent is obviously paranoid as fuck

[lunewolf13]

I mentally had this conversation in my mind. Based off my Damian joins the Batfam really early fic:

Interveiwer: What's the first thing you do when you publicly reveal you have recently acquired a three year old?

a) Park

b) Zoo

c) Shopping

d) Take over the world

e) Other

Bruce chooses e.

Bruce: I took him to the doctor.

"Why not to the park?" The interviewer would ask. "Or the zoo? Somewhere to celebrate and spend time with your new son?

Bruce: Because the thought of him getting sick and suffering from the flu or chicken pox upsets me so viscerally that I have to suppress the urge to wrap him in bubble wrap and bring him to the pediatrician just so they can confirm to me he's perfectly healthy.

Interviewer:

Interviewer: Aren't those normal childhood illnesses though?

Bruce: Clearly you've never had nightmares of all the people you care about dying in front of you.

Interviewer: ...We're taking a ten minute break.