#Boyakishan

[boyakishan]

A Minecraft movie should be a few things.

A dumb family flick you watch because it's a cool premise.

A vibes based movie, with no "ending" just a finish.

Stupid remaking of events already happened.

Some kind of tribute.

Technoblade movie would be kinda sick lol

i made this meme in a blind rage

[boyakishan]

Alien: I'm going out!

Human: why?

Alien: well, it's frankly stuffy-

Human: it's going to rain in *sniffs air* half an hour?

Alien: but. It's not even cloudy.

Human: yeah. You're here in the tropics. Remember?

Alien: ... You're being ridiculous. Back on my planet, the rains are big and heavy.

Human: same here, those are monsoon rains though. What I smell is your standard shower. [Tropics people, y'know what I mean by shower].

Alien: it won't be that bad.

Human: bring the light jacket and hat.

Alien: I won't need it!

Twenty minutes later:

Human: told you.

Alien: how is this standard rain.

Human: welcome to the jungle. It'll be gone in anywhere between. 8 hours to ten minutes.

Alien: what?

Human: doesn't smell that thick. So... Ten minute range.

Alien: ... I thought you were Australian.

Human: I thought I told you I was also from the tropics. Also, Australia's even worse. There the rain can go for a week, to a minute.

Alien: ....

Human: not to mention it's COLD.

Alien: what?

Human: now get in, you're gonna contract malaria or some shit.

Alien: what??

Human: Doesn't matter, get in before you explode like a water balloon.

[boyakishantrinity]

I will not infringe on the Church in any way. I will not hurt a cleric or a monk if unarmed. I will not steal an ox, cow, pig, sheep, goat, ass, or a mare with colt. I will not attack a villain or villainess or servants or merchants for ransom. I will not take a mule or a horse male or female or a colt in pasture from any man from the calends of March to the feast of the All Saints unless to recover a debt. I will not burn houses or destroy them unless there is a knight inside. I will not root up vines. I will not attack noble ladies travelling without husband nor their maids, nor widows or nuns unless it is their fault. From the beginning of Lent to the end of Easter I will not attack an unarmed knight.

Might make a new oath based off this.

[boyakishantriage]

Daily life in the life of me

Head groggy, eyes flickering. Back aching enough to feel the crackle tingling sensation like the flicker of electricity at the ends of the spines. Lightly cracking the back muscles, each grumbling as subconscious muttering echoed.

"I DON'T WANNA"

Running past, Eleanor holding a needle as Charlie ran by in what looked like mismatched protective gear. Several needles lined around the hall, the door into my brain rushed past as Al walked by.

"..."

"Blood tests."

"... I figured. But I'd-"

"You fight gods for a living and you'd have the weirdest kinks."

Glancing to the reader, a single unanswered question on his lips before he took a pole to downstairs.

Rolling my eyes, pushing blankets off myself as I drunkenly swung forward. Blinking for a few moments before I stood over the bench. Pills lightly tossed into by mouth. Swallowing the bottle, gasping as I felt the pale sensation of wires straightening, a massive lens shifting across as it burned neural pathways straighter than normal.

"CHOP CHOP PEOPLE."

"we're the same person."

"fuck off."

"fuck you."

"listen here-"

BANG.

"what's for breakfast?"

"I dunno, sis has lasagne."

"LASAGNA."

"FUCK OFF."

"there's curry shit-"

"that's for ern si."

"... Noodles are done!"

Idk what this is.

[boyakishan]

Depends on the game tbh. Doom's got so much geometry you've gotta have a decent set up to play it.

If the game's story, the gameplay, etc. If they match the aesthetics, than I say that's pretty good.

this is a controversial opinion and I’m not a gamer but I don’t need my graphics to be that good. I don’t need to see every individual feather on a bird. my poor computer doesn’t deserve to carry that weight either.

[boyakishan]

Human: ok. I hear you. But again, I would like to reiterate. I have a fucking gun.

Alien bandit: ... That primative-

BANG

Human: ... Killed that guy fine.

[boyakishantrinity]

Considering Rebooting the SlugTerra story.

I'd suggest reading it, either way this is just a heads up.

[boyakishan]

Fucking bullshit is a favourite of mine. Here we go again :).

Other human: FUCKING BULLSHIT?

Alien: What's wrong. And what-

Random human: I'M GOING TO THROW THIS STUPID FUCKING-

Alien: uhhhhh

Human: trust me. Just. Let em-

Other human: Fucking bullshit, fucking bullshit. Fuck. This. Bull. Fucking. Shit! Oh ok, yeah that makes so much sense

Alien: what's going on?

Other human: *whips to glare at alien.* THIS STUPID FUCKING-*autism rage noises.*

Alien: *slowly backing off.*

Human: *just casually fixes the issue, stepping away.

Other human: *yeets a sofa onto its side, slamming the boxing bag hard enough it smacks into them*

Alien: what's-

Human: no idea. Don't ask me why, other does this every few weeks during a big job.

Alien: ... So, do we-

Human: eh, bandages are on hand, hospital knows other and-

Alien: they appear to be beating the broken sand bag.

Human: they are?

Other human: *lotta swearing*

Human: mmmm. *Slowly pulls alien and closes the door.* Let's just. Go.

Other: *thump.*

Alien: ... How is this normal?

Human: it isn't. Other's probably a bit more stressed than normal.

Alien: a bit?

Human: they didn't break the computer?

BANG.

Human: ... Right, well. Guess that's a breaking room.

Alien: breaking room?

Human: y'know how human aggression can cause it to continue spiking for hours?

Alien: yes?

Human: I could try to stop other, calm them down and all that. Or I could sacrifice a room for a few hours.

Alien: ... Is this. Normal for the species?

Human: oh heavens no, other's just got some anger issues.

*the wall starts pounding, slowly decreasing in strength and speed.*

Alien: .. is that-

Human: should be fine, give it five minutes. You should probably go see otherother human.

Alien: I'm now more...

Human: worried?

Alien: yes. Are you sure this will be documented anonymously?

Human: pretty sure.

Other human: m'kay, I'm done. Gonna nap now.

Human: you're paying for the wreckage.

Other human: I know.

Alien: ... That's it?

Human: heavens no. But doesn't matter for now.

Alien: ...

*the room's got literal holes, one computer, several bean bag pillows, part of the sand in the boxing bag has turned to glass, the floor's partially dented.*

Alien: ...

Human: huh, well. That's. Better?

Alien: better?

Human: the room's not on fire, the computers are still fine.

Human: *pushes a button, tech rolling behind walls, plastic bags, a fire extinguisher pop out.*

Alien: ... How.

Human: the power of anger, now shoo. Go find someone else to bother.

Alien: that's. That sand's turned to glass.

Human: mhmm, now shoo. I've gotta clean this up.

[boyakishan]

My theory on laughter. Is that it's a social thing developed as humanity slowly split off, an evolution thing where disparate groups slowly develop similar attributes by pure chance.

Or maybe it's remnants of a thing animals do, where they go GAH after an unexpected thing at "home" or within relative safety.

People who did it, it became associated with happy things. A specific noise by random mutation when you joined a new group (what was probably a common occurrence back then) that helped to integrate into the early society of the time.

Living in a proto society, basic rules and stuff, general respect but that's it.

A happy noise when you're surprised, because that's the basis of comedy. What the funny part of the funny rules in comedy. Juxtaposition and stuff, it's just surprise. Pulling the rug. Etc.

It's not that big of a thing, but it generally increases happy hormones, which probably links people together and closer, so when they get attacked or something, they'll relax more when whatever they did to relax after an attack.

Based on nothing.

Just out my ass, consider it a theory on humans. Based on general ideas and basis of how we do emotion stuff.

[boyakishan]

I have this thing where I say. "oh you mother fucker" to things when I'm doing chores that are done with more work to make them aesthetically and functionally pleasing (like organising the shelf and also when I'm frustrated.) And like. Mm.

Human: oh you mother fucker.

Human: oh you mother fucker.

Human: mmmm, you mother fucker.

Alien: ... Human, what-

*Human is standing on their bedframe, pulling and doing their bed.*

Human: yes mother- uh. Alien?"

Alien: I have multiple question. What-

Human: my bed?

Alien: oh, ok. Uhm, what-

Human: doing my bed?

Alien: ... Like.

Human: what? No. Fuck no.

Alien: oh, so what are you doing with your bed sheet?

Human: making it straight?

Alien: why?

Human: it looks better?

Alien: ... Sure. But why-

Human: ... Same reason one of our greatest weapons against good swords is catching it in a softwood shield and twisting the blade away. And then punting the cunt.

Alien: EXCUSE ME BUT DID YOU JUST SAY-

[boyakishan]

help, I think I’m Aro or sm

Welcome to the cult.

[boyakishan]

If you do repost/wanna repost, just ask. If they say no, then. They said no.

If yes, add links to their stuff, their name. And that you've asked.

Based on actual events

[boyakishan]

"Sometimes I go like.

"I want to kill myself 🌈🤗🌈"

And some people go.

"Hey- don't-"

I cut in.

"I won't. Stop worrying. It's either I joke about wanting to kill myself, I I go murder a bunch of people and then kill myself."

And they go.

"... You. Won't do that. "

I reply.

"... Probably. Want to find out what'll actually happen? Keep telling me to do things I already know. Anyways. Back to punching unicorns."

"

Alien:

"... We're going to jump the captain. What the fu-"

[boyakishan]

omg ur right, turns out I do have severe problems

Omg, wow. Really? Turns out my gaydar was right.

[boyakishan]

To people who get all sad and depressed because I did some shit and you feel like shit because of it.

Get in a fucking corner and have a fucking cry.

I'm serious, not a joke. Get in the corner, cry. Scream, shout. Get angry and yeet a squishmallow across the room. Get all your little emotions about, fucking do something about that sad clump and instead of sitting there and doing fuck all.

Get mad, use it to create an impassioned speech, figure out why, organise your room. Get enough fucking emotion that you can start a snowball of actions and choices, and do something with your fucking emotions instead of letting the snow/rain whatever fall onto you.

Sincerely, a moron.

Alien: *upon reading this* Human, WHAT THE FU-

[boyakishan]

Yo. Lurkers, likings good and all. But reblogging literally does more. If you're anxious or whatever.

You're on Tumblr.

Short of you getting fucked on a dildo for a banner. Nobody's gonna care.

I literally know none of you.

Tldr: I forgot why I was writing this, night.