#Bhruizz

[uselessidiotsquad]

Should you fight my characters? Asura Flavor!

Mhonde

Battle music: My Algo - I am Robot and Proud

Should you fight Mhonde? Let me get this perfectly clear, you want to fight MHONDE? The two foot tall, mostly blind engineer who names all his golems like they were dogs and is a walking, unceasing hype machine for his giant girlfriend? Okay just checking. So you should you fight him - absolutely not what is wrong with you. He's a good person, kind-hearted, friendly, and will try to diffuse all situations.

Who initiates the fight? By initiate, I mean you would honestly have to just attack him, he will try reasoning and compromise for anything. Maybe if you talked poorly about Raj, he would rewire your house out of spite and make it turn the power off just to the alarms, clocks, electronics so you are late for everything. But no fights would happen.

Who would win? ...he can't see hardly anything, he's maybe the size of a toddler, and he's distracted by tinkering with golems. You could crumple him like an aluminum can with one good hit. But also don't.

Fhiaskko

Battle music: Flight of the Bumblebee - (feat. Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov) (Gravel Dubstep Remix)

Should you fight Fhia? For an entirely different reason than Mhonde, no you should not fight Fhia. She is actively cursed and you are liable to die to weird things even before you try to actually fight her. Meteor, heart attack, combustion, getting hit by a car, you name it, it could happen. So no, avoid her at all costs.

Who initiates the fight? I mean she's former Priory, so would rather talk you to death than fight you. You would initiate it but regret it given the nature of her curse.

Who would win? Fhia but not because she tries, just because something fell on you and killed you before you get a swing in on her. Huh! Another statistical improbability for the books!

Bhruizz

Battle music: Roygbiv - Boards of Canada

Should you fight Bhruizz? For yet another entirely different reason, no. Xe is very laid back and chill, not one for getting stirred up easily, and not one for starting drama. However, xe fights unpredictably being a berzerker so it's easy to get caught off guard. Morally, xe isn't a bad person just kinda keeps to xemself so there's not really a reason to.

Who initiates the fight? Yet again it would have to be you, xe doesn't have energy or inclination to fight.

Who would win? It's a 50/50. If you fight xem and they don't enrage, you win. Xe would honestly forfeit like 5 seconds into the fight - letting you win. Don't have energy for that. If xe does enrage, xe is absolutely winning. Bhruizz goes all in when xe does choose to fight and is good at both ranged, melee, and mid - so you're up shits creek there.

Mhunizz

Battle music:

(When you first encounter him) Not a Word, O My Friend - Peter Cavallo

(When he realizes you aren't buying his act and he's trying to escape)

Perchin'- Louie Zong

Should you fight Mhunizz? Yes. He's a slimy little asshole who tries (and usually succeeds in) UWUing his way through life and guilt tripping people to get what he wants. Or stealing it if it doesn't work. Mhunizz is extremely selfish and arrogant. While at his core he isn't a bad person, he also just thinks of himself, and an ass kicking might mellow him out for a while.

Who would initiate the fight? You would because he tries to sob story his way through any form of conflict. Once you get past the puppy dog eyes, he will realize that he can't cry and lip quiver his way out of this one.

Who would win? Oh if it was an actual fight you would for sure win, he's a Guardian but most of his magic is defensive and healing based to make people rely on him and trust him. However, it's far more likely that he's gonna run away as soon as he finds out the 🥺didn't work.

Khenazzi

Battle music: Authority - Vondkreistan

Should you fight Khenazzi? From a moral standpoint, yes. She's made her way high in the Inquest ranks through cruel ingenuity. However, from an actual combat standpoint, I might argue against it. She uses custom poisons she's engineered herself and honestly even if you win against her now - you will be having issues for the rest of your life because of the slow acting side effects. It's her last laugh, she plays the slow game.

Who would initiate the fight? She would. Khenazzi is of the belief that Asura are the natural rulers of Tyria given their intellectual superiority and thus everyone else needs to comply or die. Given that she's higher rank, it would be hard to find her though, you would have had to be looking. Which, is an invitation for death, in her book.

Who would win? She's not physically the strongest but she's great at evading. And while if you can catch her it will be game over, she poisons the dickens out of everything. She would even let you catch her just so she can make sure to be able to stab you at least once with her daggers so you get a taste of the poisons. So yeah, you can kill her, but you will be suffering for the rest of your life. Poisons leading to blindness, organ failure, cognitive deterioration and chronic pain.

Dhizzi

Battle Music: Held - Holy Other

Should you fight Dhizzi? There's nothing to fight about her? She's already stuck in the Mists, you can't kill her. Chances are she wouldn't kill you either, so not real point. Morally, she may be strong willed, but she does what she can to cheat the inevitable for others. Giving everyone more than a fighting chance. She helps, in her own way. So no, it would amount to nothing.

Who would initiate the fight? You would and she would promptly laugh. You're gonna fight her? Really? Don't you have something better to do? She's already broken all the rules regarding death by sneaking people out of various planes of the Mists. Fisticuffs with the forbidden ferryman doesn't seem like a bright idea.

Who would win? No one is. She's unkillable in her current state, more of a force than a person at times, and doesn't have time for skirmishes with people. She's got countless dead to keep track of and make sure they get back into the fight. Maybe if you wanted to see what dying felt like but didn't want to commit to it - she'd oblige you.

[uselessidiotsquad]

I have a few kids that are a bit lore wobbly, I think I've mentioned them before though so if a repeat is boring, sorry! Under the cut to save peoples dash.

The first of the group is beloved bog boy Naechdion (he/him) or Dion for short. He's lore breaking because I had made a whole separate timeline for him when he actually gets to fulfill his role. But then didn't like how mean it made him ;;

Originally, he was going to be the Voice of Mordremoth, since Mordremoth can't communicate to non-sylvari in a direct manner. Dion was going to be the mouthpiece, to be able to speak the Dragon's will to those who aren't planty.

Which is why he's canon wise closer to the height of Mordremoths Champions (smaller than Axemaster Hareth aka Harry) height and why his voice is very strange. He wasn't supposed to have his own voice (why would you give a mouthpiece it's own voice, that's conflicting) so he basically had to force himself to make close approximations of sounds based off of a half memory. Through the Dream, he was still partially connected to, he got bits and pieces of speech.

Next is Caonai (she/her) who breaks the lore because she is from another Tree, the now deceased Shiverpeaks Tree which predates the Pale Tree by more than 50 years. The Dream was still in its infancy and hazy development then so there wasn't a great pool of memories or experiences to draw from. Instead it was basic survival and how to not die in the far north. Whereas the Pale Tree based it's saplings off of Humans, the Shiverpeaks tree based hers off of Jotun.

Cao is also much larger and closer to Norn sized than the Maguuma Sylvari.

Next, I would argue Toraedh (any pronouns) is lore breaking. I have a lot of beef with how Nightmare is presented at times given that I think it's more of a spectrum than a black or white fixed (it can be black or white but the default isn't that).

They are half in half out as it were, split right down the middle. This has made his life really honestly quite shit in many ways, as most Dreamers tend to see any hint of Nightmare as being *all Nightmare*. Using this as best as she can to ruin nefarious plans while also saving willing Courtiers from execution from the Warden's. They play both sides to help others as much as they can and are hated for it by both as a result.

It makes for a very conflicted person and a very challenging life, but their nature at heart has always been to help. Despite their bravado/false charisma and shifty behavior - she is a very kind hearted and understanding person. There's hardly anyone you'd meet that's possible of being less judgemental.

We also have some of the newer kids, like Initiator Phiaskko (she/her)! She is quite simply, absolutely cursed. Research and studying ancient relics from the conglomerate of islands from the Mists has its downsides. In a streak of amusement her curse doesn't impact her directly? She causes accidents and misfortune around her. So the rest of her krewe left her because strange accidents would end up crippling and killing many of them.

Though to her credit, she isn't fully aware of it being a curse. To her it's all weird coincidence, statistical improbability, curses are superstitious and she doesn't abide by that sort of thinking.

Larthi Glimmerforge (it/it's) is also very lore breaking. It's a Chronomancer, displaced in time. After the mysterious death of it's 'bandmates (which was a direct result of time magic - weird things happen with time) which the Legions blamed it for, it became a Gladium. Though it did manage to join the Forge warband at least on paper.

It's system of time magic is one of equal sum but placed differently. Larthi can suppress when it is going to jump either forward or backward in time but that number isn't discarded. So here's halfway of an example to try to make sense ^^;

Say it was going to jump forward by 50 years. But it very much doesn't want to! (It doesn't know how long the time gaps will be). So it suppresses it and doesn't jump forward at all. Those 50 years are added to the next jump that happens, either forward or backwards, since time is a loop not a line.

The next time, it is going to get ported backwards but can't suppress it. Well originally for this backwards jump it was only going to be a few months but because it suppresses it, it goes back 50 years and a few months. This can accumulate too! So if it suppresses it for too long that could be 100's of years of build up (there is no cap) that gets used the next time it can't suppress it.

As a result, Larthi is detached to the point of fatalism. Why bother having friends when at any moment you could be 20 years ahead of them or port to before they were born? Why own anything? It can only take the shirt on its back with them. Why bother?

Also it's Mesmer magic is not butterflies but in the shape of dozens of white mice. Which creeps some people out, I suppose.

I would also reckon that Bhruizz (xe/xem/xir is lore breaking. We don't hear much of Asura who aren't throwing themselves at research and intellectual things. Bhruizz is a drifter, for all intents and purposes, taking odd jobs and not being stuck with a krewe or a calling. Xe has no 'title' or prefix. It's just Bhruizz and that's the way xe wants it.

Naturally, this doesn't incur a lot of respect from other Asura. Especially family (Mhonde being the only one who is supportive of xir choices). But xe is as chill as chill can be and one of the most down to earth, no scientific jargon using, approachable people around. Even a bit lazy with things, at times.

But beneath that there is such a strong amount of rage that it's very shocking when xir berzerker nature gets revealed. When xe gets set off, xe is terrifying. But honestly if you are trying to piss xem off that's on you - xe doesn't get worked up about much.

SHARE YOUR LORE-BREAKING GW2 CHARACTERS

We haven't done one of these in a while, and I miss em! Please, jump on here with a reblog and tell me all about your characters that break canon lore! Everyone, as usual, will get a response. Add pictures, ramble for paragraphs and paragraphs! Come play in this space with me and show off your cool-ass characters that stretch the limits of gw2's lore!

[uselessidiotsquad]

Mhonde's family is almost all the way fleshed out. We have his eldest sibling now, an over achiever who found her success in the Inquest.

Meet Khenazzi. Being full of the enthusiasm and drive like her youngest brother, she took it to the opposite end of the spectrum. Deciding to use it to support unorthodox and morally questionable research for the Inquest. She is alarmingly tall for an Asura, reaching nearly 4'6. That's just over double what Boot Sized Mhonde is running (he's 2'2 on a good day).

Not one for sentiment, she's not concerned for her family and doesn't contact them. Her place is among the high ranking Inquest members, where she feels like she is given the respect that she deserves. Most of Khenazzi's siblings are Inquest Apathetic, the exception being Mhonde who is whole-heartedly against the group. Her parents remain proud of her accomplishments, despite the context they are presented.

Khenazzi was supposed to be a role model for her siblings but thought the duty below her. We can see where Mhunizz, who really looked up to her, adopted some of his shifty behavior from.

The family goes:

Khenazzi (Driven and Inquest)

Mhunizz (Thieving little asshole)

(MIA from the Mist War)

Bhruizz (Unbothered and chill)

Fhiaskko (Actively cursed!)

Mhonde (Hyper and enthusiastic)

What a mess their house must have been growing up.

[uselessidiotsquad]

Asura Rambles

Bhruizz is interesting to me, when I think of what would a 'rebel youth that turned into a rebel adult' look like in an Asura. What would defiance of the norms be? Instead of study and focus and intellectual pursuits someone who just... is chill. Doesn't have big lofty goals, doesn't want to be the 'head of a field', doesn't care about Krewes. Takes things one day at at time. Sleeps in late, shows up late to everything.

Which is what xe is - essentially - the family rebel.

Mhunizz is the family pain in the ass that people are tired of covering for. Get rich quick schemes that went south, borrowing money and lying about where it went, petty breaking and entering. Pick-pocketing. Shows up and then you realize all your fancy silver wear is missing. He's just a little shit, he's not actually a bad person. He just likes money more than he likes uh people.

Meanwhile Mhonde as youngest being the 'good kid' of the group. Does all the 'right' things, is a little too enthusiastic at times, but then alarms his family by dating a Norn. The only one of his family who bothered to show approval about it was Bhruizz. The reason his name doesn't follow the family tradition is because it was his moms not so subtle way of saying NO MORE GD KIDS. (AMAB kiddos end in 'izz'). (Lol edited the typo a-bab also right ngl) The rest of the family hasn't really shown up yet, but I'm hoping to find out more about them.

1 ?

2 (Mhunizz) Slimy little asshole.

3 ?

4 (Bhruizz) Lazy but chill.

5 ?

6 (Mhonde) Enthusiastic and upbeat.

[uselessidiotsquad]

⏳️

Ty for the ask fren! Random Wheel choose Bhruizz, my little Asura Berzerker.

Bhruizz:

"Hm? Me? Uh, well I haven't done a whole lot, in terms of like adventures. Oh wait - wait wait wait - I got one for you. So I found out the quickest way to get out of soul numbing lectures in Leyline Statistics is to make up your test answers and then claim you got them through random luck.

Two reasons. First reason, you tell an Asuran professor anything is 'luck' and they start to inflate with opinions and theories. Can't keep their technical lingo to themselves and want to logic all over you. Second reason, since they can't use a theory to explain it when you get it right, it throws them off. You mix the two of them together and you have a perfect recipe to be able to get out of class. Mainly because my instructor turned a shade of red I've only seen in beets."

[uselessidiotsquad]

Larthi Glimmerforge (it/its) NB kiddo! - Unstuck in time and it is experiencing The Horrors of uncontrolled jumping forwards and backwards in time.

Bhruizz (xe/xem) another NB kiddo!

A chill Berzerker who would rather be taking a nap than fighting things (as long as 'things' means actual risks and not just people picking on xir little brother, then xe is very much pro fighting).

I have a few others but don't have good screens of them rn to be able to share!

Hey GW2 peeps hit me up with your trans characters o/

Drop a picture, tell me about them, whatever you like!

[uselessidiotsquad]

I have a new sharkrat, don't have any decent screens of him yet but he's Mhonde and Bhruizz' sibling! Who keeps tottering on the edge of being disowned by the family because he's a little shit.

The embodiment of puppy eyes - of 'I'm just ;; a little guy ;; you cant be mean to me ;; i'll just disappear' and then immediately starting shit as soon as you look away.

The man, the myth, the legend, Mhunizz.

He's a Guardian but he will steal your wallet, keys, and anything else he can get his three fingered hands on. Second oldest of 6 siblings and family nuisance. Even Bhruizz, the 'lazy' one of the family is appreciated more. At least xe is nice to others, genuinely.

Mhunizz is only nice if it gets him something.

Cutest little weasel bastard. He's not a terrible person. Just a selfish one.

[uselessidiotsquad]

OC group ask game! Who would be the best (and who would be the worst) at Karaoke?

@commanderfloppy

Ooo fun one! In terms of -

Singing voice (Best)

Ruby. She has a lovely singing voice.

Mhunizz. He has a surprisingly melodic one.

Phil. He's not got any training but has a very rustic, folksy sounding voice that's good for a few types of songs.

Glanaim. Though a bit nasally in sound, he does have a nice voice when he's not purposefully trying to be smarmy.

Singing voice (Worst)

Riag. The man is as tone deaf as a stump, a running joke is his singing would be able to kill Risen twice over.

Deilius. Their voice is cracks and breaks so much from being garroted it wouldn't sound great, plus they'd be too embarrassed to try.

Dion. He barely speaks and people have a hard time understanding him, it sounds like wind through branches more than words often.

Performance (Best)

SIGILIS. GET OUT OF THE WAY SHE'S GONNA BE DANCING ON EVERYTHING. It's a full on show with her.

Valens! Her 'band name isn't 'Forgedance' for nothing!

Bhruizz. While xe doesn't always sound the best, xe has a lot of fun getting other people involved in singing with xem and like joining in on the chorus or waving lighters.

Performance (Worst)

Mhonde. The poor boot sized boy would be too embarrassed and would just freeze up and awkwardly stumble through it. Likely will stop before the song is done and hand the mic off to someone else (beet red and uncomfortable the whole time afterwards).

Tied for Absolute Worst is Calguais, a very rigid and uptight Warden who would be funny because they're so bad at having fun. But painful to witness. And Galla - who has the affect of Murder Time and scares people even if she tried to be enthusiastic about it. Her RBF makes the situation tense.

[uselessidiotsquad]

Hadn't gotten to properly introduce Bhruizz since I had been absent. One of Mhonde's older siblings (4 of 6 - Mhonde being number 6) who was training to be a member of the Lionguard but quickly found that dealing with the formality of it didn't suit xem.

As a middle child, Bhruizz sort of blended into the background and didn't bother trying to outshine xir siblings, taking to escort jobs and handiwork. A lack of motivation to excel or focus on one field hasn't earned respect among other Asura and most of xir family. The exception being Mhonde, who is as aggressively supportive as they come.

Being a 'drifter' so to speak among Asura is not thought of highly, though that doesn't tend to deter Bhruizz. Laid back and easy to please, xe just scraped by with passing in Statics and that was the end of it. Despite the amiable and chill disposition, xe is a formidable warrior. It's just getting xem to the point of fighting that you will likely regret, as something of a frenzy takes over.

[uselessidiotsquad]

General Character Overview:

Idiot Squad

Nightmare Troop

Primary Characters:

(Notes: for any of them that have 'voice claims' it's just examples of voices I've found that get pretty close to how I hear the characters speak, not claiming that it's the exact person in question. That would be a little creepy.)

Ruby Aenn (any pronouns, usually she/her), Current Commander of the Pact. (Interview)

Riaghael (he/him), Former Commander of the Pact. (Interview) (Otome Route - unfinished) (Scar map) (Voice claim) (Commissioned Art) (Commissioned Art 2) (Commissioned Art 3) (Commissioned Art 4)

Deiliús (they/he), Nightmare Convert. (Interview) (Otome Route) (Voice claim) (Scar map) (Commissioned Art) (Commissioned Art 2)(Commissioned Art 3) (Commissioned Art 4)

Secondary Characters:

Forge Warband

Sigilis Forgemuzzle (she/her) -  Legionnaire, Head Engineer of the Pact.(Interview) (Commissioned Art)

Galla Strangleforge (she/her)- Pact Combat Instructor.

Ordia Sprintforge (she/her) - Freelance consultant.

Valens Forgedance (she/they) - Olmakhan Runaway.

Naechdion (he/him), Swamp dwelling nomad. (Interview) (Otome Route: here and here)

Glanaim (he/him), Hired Sniper for the Pact. (Interview) (Voice claim)

Warden Cálguais (they/them), Warden Captain.

Madrúil (he/him), Nightmare Kennelmaster. (Interview) (Voice Claim) (Otome Route) (Commissioned Art)

Countess Diamhasla (she/her), Countess of Blasphemy. (Interview) (Voice claim) (Commissioned Art)

Caonaí (she/her), Shiverpeaks Sylvari, first to Awaken. (Interview)

Árgiúis *Storyverse*, Shiverpeaks Sylvari - seventh to Awaken.

Mhonde (he/him), Retired Lightforge Calibrator. (Interview) (Commissioned Art)

Raja the Vehement (she/her), a very unorthodox Raven Shaman.

Elder Parteira (she/her), an Olmakhan midwife. (Interview)

Toraedh (he/she/they), a questionable 'Courtier'

Semni Keensnare (she/her), an ancient Gladium who outlived all her warband by tenacity alone.

Philetus Hearthmend (he/him), a Fire Shaman who currently uses his magic to fix peoples stoves and fireplaces.

Larthi Glimmerforge (it/its), a Chronomancer who has a hard time controlling where it ends up.

Initiator Fhiaskko (she/her), an Asuran Reaper who is absolutely not cursed, not even in the slightest.

Bhruizz (xe/xem), one of Mhonde's older siblings, a skilled warrior who knows xe's way around a sword.

Ships:

Unburiable (Riaghael / Trahearne)

Warcat Wives (Sigilis / Galla)

Raven's Jest (Mhonde/Raja)

Warden's Nightmare (Toraedh/ Shoilieru @moonlit-grove )

Campfire Cats (Philetus / Crecia)

Writing:

Most of my drabbles with be tagged with #squadstories for the main Idiot Squad or #nightmaretales for the Nightmare Troop.

La • Maison • Dieu   (Nightmare Troop Canon)

The Star (Nightmare Troop Canon pt 2)

Ossify (Post HoT explanation for Riaghael)

Affairs of the Heart (-on pause- Ongoing Canon)

[mystery-salad]

Repeats are always welcome! I love seeing characters pop up on these in their varying facets of life, and I know others who haven't seen past posts check these out~ repeat characters are ALWAYS welcome just as much as new ones 💖

Dion doin his best 🥺 in glad he was able to find a voice for himself despite the way mordremoth designed him!

A shiverpeaks tree based off of Jotun!! Now there's a beautiful idea, I would love to hear about how Caonai looks. She must be very capable.

Toraed my beloved, delightful nightmare/dream duality 🤝 I love this concept for him! She's such a delight and sounds so immensely kind in the face of how others view them. Love the nuances you could explore here!

A cursed asura named Phiaskko, love that!!!!! Glad she's working through it and doing her best despite being cursed, good on her for keeping more practical and trying to roll with it.

Larthi 😭 it needs some immortal friends asap, people who can find it in any time jump and be a constant in its life...must be awful never knowing if you'll see someone again and what could happen to them. Especially after already losing its entire first warband. 🫂

Berserker asura!!! Love these, I've got one too and it's easily my favorite combo, leads to such a non-typical asura attitude. Bhruizz is doin great, I hope xe finds many friends outside of the asuran cities who support the way xe talks and acts. Sounds like a wonderful friend to have honestly!

SHARE YOUR LORE-BREAKING GW2 CHARACTERS

We haven't done one of these in a while, and I miss em! Please, jump on here with a reblog and tell me all about your characters that break canon lore! Everyone, as usual, will get a response. Add pictures, ramble for paragraphs and paragraphs! Come play in this space with me and show off your cool-ass characters that stretch the limits of gw2's lore!