#Being friendly in a debate weakens your argument.

[botheringlevi]

Hi Levi,

So I was reminded of a friendly debate I had with someone a while ago and I just really really need to know your opinion:

What do you think is the right way to hang up a toilet roll?

(Is this a stupid question? Yes. Did you say we couldn’t bother you with stupid questions? 😉)

Under? Are you fucking serious? How is this a debate? What other idiot opinions does this "someone" have, Jay?

It's not a stupid question, just so obvious that it shouldn't be a question in the first place.

Over.

[ranwing]

KADAM FIC: LEARNING TO FLY (17/?)

Title: Learning to Fly Series: A New Direction (was Season Four Remix) Pairing(s), Characters(s): Kadam, Kurt Hummel, Adam Crawford, Burt Hummel, Rachel Berry, Santana Lopez, Carmen Tibideaux, Cassandra July, Artie Abrams, Tina Cohen-Chang, Elliot “Starchild” Gilbert, Dani, Adam’s Apples, Original Characters Rating: PG13 (rating may change) Genre(s): canon divergence. Parts: 16/?

Summary: As another school year starts at NYADA, Kurt seemed to have it all. The respect of his teachers, a group of wonderful friends and best of all, getting to live with the man that he’d come to love. So of course the universe would throw a few curve balls in his direction.

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine, Part Ten, Part Eleven, Part Twelve, Part Thirteen, Part Fourteen, Part Fifteen, Part Sixteen

One A03

Rachel felt herself grinning from ear to ear as they exited the theater and looked up at her date, who was happily babbling about they show they’d just seen.

“I’m not going to lie, but I was really dubious about the show. Especially when you said that there were puppets involved,” Neil insisted, keeping Rachel close with an arm about her shoulders. “I was picturing some kind of lame Sesame Street rip-off and a theater full of five-year olds.”

Rachel shook her head. “I thought that you trusted me,” she complained. “It did win the Tony while it was on Broadway.”

“Like that means anything to me,” Neil chided. “But it was hysterical! I couldn’t stop laughing the whole time.”

Rachel was very aware of that and pleased that she’d guessed correctly in choosing the best show to get Neil to dip his toe into the shallow end of the theater world. She’d put the gift from the NYADA alumni to very good use when she announced that this would be their date activity was a Friday evening performance of Avenue Q.

“Whoever wrote those songs is either insane or a total genius,” Neil insisted. “I am never going to get that song out of my head.

“The internet is for porn,” he sang with enthusiasm, albeit very off key. “Why you think the net was born? Porn, porn, porn…”

Rachel giggled, giving him a poke in the side with her elbow. A few people were looking over to stare at Neil’s terrible singing, but she didn’t have the heart to tell him to stop since he seemed to be enjoying himself so much.

“And that scene with the puppets fucking… That’s an image that I’m not going to forget for quite while,” Neil complained playfully. “I’m sure that some parents had no idea what the show was about and had to hustle their kids out once in a while.”

“So, theater isn’t so boring, now?” she asked with a twinkle in her eye. Not that she ever thought that Neil would grow to love it in the way that she did, but she’d be very happy if it became something that they could share in some small way. It seemed that Avenue Q was pretty much the perfect show to take him to see.

Neil looked down at her, seeing the hope in her eyes and allowed himself to smile a little bit. “It wasn’t so bad,” he granted. “Shows like this, I think that I can get behind.”

She was glad that he had enjoyed it since she’d been so insistent on dragging him

He gave her shoulders a squeeze as they walked down the street. “Thanks for bringing me,” Neil insisted, giving her the smile that always caused her knees to weaken. “I really enjoyed it.”

She leaned in, enjoying the feel of his strong body next to hers. “I’m glad. And thank you for coming with me,” she said sincerely.

“Well, since you provided the entertainment, I’m taking you out for dinner,” he proposed, his tone leaving no room for argument. “Elliot said that there’s a really good Indian place just a few blocks from here.”

Rachel sighed happily, letting him guide her away from the New World Stages and allowing herself to just enjoy his company. This wasn’t like anything she had ever planned for her life. In her mind, her ideal partner should be a performer; someone that would be able to fully understand her passions and be a suitable companion on stage as well as life. That she was even entertaining the idea of fitting in a man who couldn’t carry a tune if it came in a bucket and who had nearly zero interest in theater wasn’t anything she could have anticipated.

But like most surprises, it was turning into an especially sweet one. And she was looking forward to seeing just where all this went.

* * *

“Does anyone have any idea what this is about?” Ifan asked as the entire cast of “Butcher’s Bill” walked out from the hotel into the breezy spring sunset.

Niall shrugged. “No clue,” he admitted, not bothering to hide that he was a bit apprehensive. “Has to be something important.”

Adam nodded in agreement, falling into step alongside his friend as they strolled towards the restaurant. They had gotten the call for a dinner meeting with the production team on their one day off, which could mean pretty much anything from an offer of congratulations for a good job or advising that they would all be out of a job by the time dessert was served. They just wouldn’t know what was going on until they were told.

At least they’d get a good meal out of the deal, he considered as they walked into the upscale Italian trattoria. While their pay was quite decent for a touring production of this type, pretty much everyone in the cast was trying to save as much as possible while on the road. They weren’t spending their money on lavish meals so eating in a place like this was not the norm for them. Admittedly, it would be a nice change from the fast food and take out that they’d all been existing on.

Despite the crowd of well-dressed men in suits and ladies in designer dresses waiting for tables, the group of less finely dressed actors were ushered right in to where a pair of large tables were set up for them, set out with fine linens and several bottles of wine and spring water. Adam couldn’t resist looking about, taking in the elegant décor and, despite wearing the best outfit he had in his limited wardrobe, feeling a bit out of place.

Their director was waiting for them with several other men that Adam didn’t recognize but assumed were other members of the production team. Malcom Jellicoe was there as well, looking quietly pleased about things. Adam mentally calculated that this probably boded well, but he’d reserve his opinion until they were told the reason for this gathering.

Mr. Keen smiled as his cast approached and he motioned to the tables. “Good evening everyone,” he greeted cheerfully. “Sit down and make yourselves comfortable. We’ve got dinner ordered and we’ll talk afterwards. Enjoy yourselves.”

Adam and Niall looked at one another and shrugged, deciding to just go along with things and wait to see what was in store. They sat down at one of the tables with some of the others in the cast and tried to ignore the little kernel of worry that refused to go away entirely and enjoy themselves.

In all, it ended up being a perfectly pleasant dinner, with multiple courses served by the friendly and efficient staff. The wine was pleasing and with no show that night, the entire cast was able to indulge a bit. Conversation flowed pleasantly, the entire group relaxing so they could enjoy themselves despite the uncertainty. Adam sipped at his glass of very pleasant Chianti, willing himself to loosen up and enjoy the evening despite any lingering anxiety over the reason behind their dinner meeting. The meal with delicious and topped off with coffee and a tray of pastries placed on the table.

Adam was debating which of the delectable looking desserts tempted him most when Mr. Keen tapped his spoon against his water glass to get their attention.

“All right, folks… I’m sure that by now you’re burning with curiosity about what this is all about,” he granted with a smile. “You can relax because it’s all for good things. Part of this is to celebrate our passing the halfway mark of our tour. You’ve all been doing spectacular work and both critical reviews and ticket sales have been well beyond what we’d hoped for. This is just a small offer our thanks for your effort and dedication.”

The cast gave a sigh of relief that things were going well and Naill reached over to pat Adam on the shoulder. It appears that they would be employed for a bit longer.

Mr. Keen nodded at that response, glad that he hadn’t unduly alarmed his dedicated performers. “Now I have some additional news for you. We’ve mentioned before the tour started about the possibility of a New York opening depending on how our tour is received. Our investors have been paying very close attention to our ticket sales and reviews. I’m happy to inform you that we’ve gotten very positive feedback and we’re now looking at an off-Broadway opening in the spring of next year. Some of the logistics are being worked out and our goal is to have all of our original cast here for that run. I certainly hope that you’ll keep your schedules open for us.”

Adam couldn’t help from grinning in happiness, and saw the expression mirrored on his friends. This was the best news that they could have expected. The prospect of more steady employment and a chance to perform in New York was everything that they could have hoped for.

Best of all, he would be back in New York, working and living with Kurt. He couldn’t have asked for anything more.

“I see that you’re pleased by the prospect,” Mr. Keen teased happily, gratified about their enthusiastic response. “Well, I have some additional good news for you. This winter, we have been invited to perform our play at the Duchess Theater on London’s West End for three weeks in honor of our Mr. Jellicoe being considered as a finalist for the Samuel Becket Theater award. His contributions to British theater are considerable and it is great honor for him to be considered.”

The members of the cast were taken aback and began to chatter excitedly over the prospect. Mr. Keen looked exceedingly pleased and smiled at his performers. “This is a immense tribute to not just our esteemed playwright, but all the hard work that you’ve done. I’ll be able to give you some more details about the exact dates later, but it’s a great joy to all of us that ‘Butcher’s Bill’ is being seen as a worthy project and will continue on.”

Several waiters appeared with bottles of Prosecco to celebrate and poured glasses of sparkling wine for the group. The members of the cast began to chatter excitedly, talking over what this all meant for them. Additional weeks of employment was not something they were going to frown about, and the opportunity to be seen by a greater audience could lead to future opportunities. It was the best news they could have received.

Adam’s mind raced as he considered the implications of this news. Barring the possibility of being run over by a truck, he couldn’t foresee any reason to prevent him from participating and he mentally calculated the scheduling. It would certainly set back any possible staging of his own play, but that was the very least of his concerns. He wasn’t anywhere near where he wanted to be on the rewrites and he knew that the odds for getting it staged in the upcoming season were more than likely not in his favor. He would probably stand a better chance once he was a bit more established as an actor and he had the time to give his play the focus that it deserved.

Staging the play in New York was the best news he could have received. It would save him the pressure of jumping back into the audition mill straight away and likely would open some additional doors for him. But London… that had come as a complete and delightful surprise.

While Adam normally would not be looking forward to leaving New York again, even for a few weeks, this was an opportunity that he knew that he just couldn’t pass up. Besides it being an opportunity to fulfill a life-long dream of performing on the West End, even for just a few weeks, it would allow him an overdue visit with his family.

Hopefully the dates would overlap with Kurt’s winter break. He was very much forward to looking to having an excuse to bringing his boyfriend to his homeland and showing him off to his family and friends there. His mother would be absolutely ecstatic for the visit, though Adam still harbored the suspicion that she would be happiest to see Kurt.

There were so many things to consider over the next few weeks, but it greatly came as a relief that immediate future employment wouldn’t be as significant a concern as it was when he woke up in the morning. If anything, he felt like he had too much going in his favor at the moment. Something would have to give.

The group of actors sauntered back to the hotel, talking excitedly as they discussed the professional bounty that had fallen into their hands. A few weeks or months of work in a show that was earning more than decent critical notice was not something any of them really felt that they would walk away from. It seemed like the entire cast was on board with the London and New York runs.

“Wow,” Niall marveled as he and Adam stepped into their room. “This is insane. I wasn’t expecting that at all.”

“Me neither,” Adam admitted. “I guess the response has been better than we knew.”

Niall looked over to his friend with a broad smile. “I can’t wait to tell Cynth. She’s going to be so happy.”

“Think that she’ll come to London with you?” Adam asked.

Niall grinned widely. “We couldn’t afford a real honeymoon, and she’s got a lot of vacation time saved up. I think I can convince her to cash a week or two in.”

Adam sat down on his bed. “It’ll be nice to see my family,” he said thoughtfully. “And I’ve been wanting to bring Kurt to England, but we haven’t been able to coordinate a time when we’d both be free.”

“Then this will give you the perfect excuse to get him on a plane.” Niall reached over to clap Adam on the shoulder. “Things are looking up for us,” he proclaimed.

Adam nodded, still trying to mentally grasp the incredible opportunity they’d been offered. “When I was a kid, I dreamed of being on the West End,” he admitted.

Niall nodded understandingly. “I did one stint there… a tiny chorus part when I was fifteen,” he explained. “Awful show, but the cast was great and the whole experience… It made me love the theater. I’ve been trying to get back on that stage ever since.”

Adam understood exactly what his friend meant. He’d dreamed of being an actor ever since his mother took him to see a local play, fascinated by how magical it was to bring a story to life. Nothing had been more important than getting to stand on that stage himself.

He had that, and so much more now. It almost felt like it was too much, but he wasn’t going to throw away the opportunities he was given. He was a professional actor now, in a show that was gaining respect with every performance.

The sacrifice was worth it, he realized. He’d regret every day spent away from Kurt, but he now could honestly say that it had been worth it. He was fulfilling his dreams and could be grateful that they were dreams that he shared with the man that he loved. He couldn’t ask for anything else.

It was two days later, on the morning of their final show in Chicago that he realized that he had some choices to make. The email from Mr. Tillman, to see if he was interested in a role for the summer festival wasn’t unexpected and he had spent a bit of time trying to work out if participating would be an option. If he didn’t know that he had “Butcher’s Bill” on his plate for the fall and spring, he probably would have jumped at the opportunity.

Now though… the schedule would be tight, he recognized. The tour was due to end right as rehearsals were set to begin, leaving him with little down time even if everything ran as planned. And he needed to find a new flat for himself and Kurt. Even if Mr. Tillman let him forgo a formal audition based solely on his past work with the company, which he honestly didn’t think would be fair, the schedule of bouncing from one show directly into another would be brutal. He’d then have only a few weeks in the fall to get his life back together before leaving for London.

Adam sighed, weighing out his options. He hated to skip the festival and as tight as the timing would be, it might be workable if he was really determined and there were no delays with the tour’s planned conclusion. Realistically though, he knew that he was going to need some proper downtime after months on the road and needed to deal with the practicalities of getting a roof over his head. This was one of those times when his head needed to overrule his heart and make the practical decision.

He got out his phone and dialed up the festival director, knowing that this was something that he would need to discuss as directly as possible without delay. He owed them nothing less. The line rang a few times before being answered.

“Hello?”

Adam swallowed tightly. “Mr. Tillman, it’s Adam Crawford,” he answered.

“Adam! It’s so good to hear from you,” Mr. Tillman said cheerfully. “How’s the tour going?”

“It’s definitely been a challenge,” Adam admitted, gratified that the director liked to keep abreast of what his performers were up to during the year. “I’ve never done anything like this, so it’s an interesting experience. Today’s our last performance in Chicago and we’re moving on to Minneapolis next. It’s a bit of an endurance trial, but I’m learning a great deal.”

He could almost see the older man nodding in understanding. “Well, I’m sure that you’ve been able to handle things,” he insisted. “So, what can I do for you today? I hope that you’re calling about the festival.”

Adam sighed. “Yes,” he acknowledged. “I know that you’re starting auditions.”

“We’ve had some people in already,” Mr. Tillman advised. “I believe that we’re seeing Kurt later this week, which I’m rather looking forward to after hearing how well he did in his school’s show.”

That brought a smile to Adam’s face. “I’m sure that he’s going to impress you,” Adam assured the director. “He’s grown quite remarkably the past year.”

“Well, I have no doubt that he’ll acquit himself well,” Mr. Tillman assured him. “But let’s talk about you. Have you given some thought to what roles you’d be interested in? I know that auditioning can be a problem with you being out of town, but I think that we can do something less formal based on your past experience with us.”

“I have. That’s actually why I’m calling,” he explained. Adam took a deep breath, knowing that he shouldn’t beat around the bush. “I’ve been thinking things over and with the tour ending right as you’re starting rehearsals, and then my play being prepared for an opening in New York, I just don’t think that I can give the festival the kind of focus that it deserves. I think that I’m going to have to miss this year.”

“Oh… that’s a real shame,” Mr. Tillman said with sincere regret and clearly not expecting the refusal. “I’m quite sorry to hear that. I was hoping that you would consider reading for Oberon with Megan coming back. We’re planning to cast her as Titania.”

Adam smiled, thinking back fondly to the actress who’s played Beatrice the past season and how well they’d worked together. “I’m really sorry,” he said sincerely. “But I need to find a new place to live when I get back to New York, and I just can’t see being able to jump into rehearsals right as the tour ends.”

“It’s all right, Adam,” Mr. Tillman assured him. “I know that you must be working very hard, and I know how difficult being in a touring production can be. We don’t want you to burn out completely. You will definitely be missed this year, but I’m glad that you’re unavailable because things are going so well for you. If I have to lose a performer that I regard so highly, that’s the reason that makes it bearable. We’ve sent a lot of actors off to bigger and better things and it was probably only a matter of time before you became one of them.”

Adam couldn’t help from smiling to himself, grateful for the director’s consideration. He had never seen Mr. Tillman resentful over the success of the performers that the festival nurtured in the three years he’d performed with them. “I appreciate that, sir,” he responded. “But there was something that I did want to run by you.”

“Hmmm? Anything that would be interesting?” the director asked.

“Possibly. I was hoping that even if I can’t perform in the shows that you might be able to use me on the production side of things,” he offered. “I did take quite a few classes on direction and stage management and I’d like to try to get a bit of practical experience.”

Mr. Tillman didn’t answer immediately, and Adam couldn’t help from biting his lower lip nervously and wonder if he was asking too much. He’d thought that they had a good working relationship based on the several years that he’d performed with the company but asking for special consideration could be pushing his luck. It wasn’t as if the company didn’t have a fine staff of professionals managing things and he probably wasn’t needed to hang around the theater and get in the way.

“Let me see what I can do,” Mr. Tillman offered. “I can’t promise a paid position, but we usually have openings for internships if that’s something that would interest you. We could at least cover your room and board during the run of the festival.”

That was exactly what he was hoping for. Even if he ended up working alongside teenagers, the practical experience would be beneficial if he ever wanted to branch out into direction. Seeing the logistics of running a professional production, from casting to staging would be invaluable for him and possibly offer future opportunities if he grew tired of acting.

And if it allowed him to spend more time with Kurt after being apart for so long, so much the better.

“Thank you so much,” Adam said gratefully. “I really appreciate it.”

He could almost hear the smile in Mr. Tillman’s voice. “Well, it would feel odd to not have you around all summer,” he granted with a chuckle. “Don’t worry… I’m sure we’ll find a use for you. Give me a call as we get closer to the season and we’ll work everything out.”

“I will,” Adam assured him. “Thanks again. This means a lot to me.”

“It wouldn’t be the same without you there in some capacity,” Mr. Tillman chuckled. “And this way, I can avoid having Kurt pouting all season.”

Adam couldn’t help from laughing a bit. “Well, he and I do appreciate it,” he insisted. “I’ll give you a call in a few weeks.”

“I’m looking forward to it,” Mr. Tillman asserted sincerely. “Good luck with the rest of your tour.”

After hanging up, Adam felt considerably better about things. He was sorry that he wouldn’t be performing that summer because he’d always enjoyed the festival, but he’d made the right decision. He needed a little down time and while he might be working, it wouldn’t be as stressful as performing. He hadn’t lied about wanting to get some real experience working behind the scenes on a production and it would be a real joy to have the chance to watch Kurt performing.

Finally feeling like things were settling in a way that worked for him, Adam got up and gave a long stretch to work the stiffness out of his body. A hot shower and a few hours enjoying the sunshine and the best of what Chicago had to offer before his final performance was exactly what he needed.

Life was a complicated thing, he considered. Plenty of bumps and unexpected turns, but the journey was worthwhile when he thought about his end destination.

* * *

Rachel studied the highlighted lines in her book a final time while Tina was on stage doing her audition. This was a bit out of her comfort zone, she recognized. Acting was so much easier with a song to guide her and she knew that this was going to deprive her of her strongest talents.

Fortunately for her, with both plays there were a good number of prime supporting roles that would be suitable for her. This was a new experience and having a chance to get her feet wet and even playing in the ensemble would be to her advantage. She needed to develop nuance as a performer and be able to act without depending on vocal gymnastics to get her emotional point across.

Kurt had scheduled his audition with theirs and watching him give a taste of what he could bring to the roles he was trying for. Seeing the reception that he got from the director and the quality of reading gave her the impression that he was more than probably going to get whatever roles he was trying for and she was pleased as hell for him. After seeing her friend pushed into the background when he was so deserving of more, watching him blossom the way he had in the past year or so had been a true joy.

Fortunately she and Tina weren’t reading for the same roles, Rachel considered as she waited for her turn. There were enough options that they could avoid putting themselves in direct competition with one another, and the last thing that Rachel wanted was for her competitiveness to get in the way of their close friendship again. There would come a time when they might be vying for the same roles, but Rachel hoped that she had finally gotten to the point where her need to win didn’t override everything else that was important to her. She’d made that mistake far too many times already.

When Tina was finished and hopped off the small stage with a happy smile, Kurt was on his feet to sweep her into his arms. “You did great,” he praised.

She just smiled and shrugged a bit. “It wasn’t bad,” she granted. “But I’m not expecting to get a big part. There are just going to be too many people with more experience than me.”

“You might be surprised,” Kurt insisted. “I was my first year.”

Mr. Tillman looked up from the notes he’d been writing and called, “Rachel? If you’re ready?”

She took a deep breath and steadied her nerves. This wasn’t Funny Girl. She wasn’t that person anymore. This was going to be different.

Once on the stage and facing the production team, she forced herself to relax as much as possible. Mr. Tillman offered her a reassuring smile and looked up from her CV. “So, Rachel… you’re also a second-year student at NYADA?” he confirmed.

“Yes. My focus has always been on musical theater, but I do understand that ignoring the wider theater world would limit my potential to develop as an actor. After seeing what Kurt was able to do last year, I knew that I needed to expand my range and I hope that I can bring something interesting to your festival.”

“And this would be your first professional production?” Mr. Tillman clarified.

For once, the reminder didn’t cause her pain. She just nodded in confirmation. “All of my experience has been in school productions,” she explained. “I’m looking forward to taking what I’ve learned over the years and trying in a more challenging environment.”

“Okay… then begin when you’re ready,” Mr. Tillman requested, sitting back in his seat to watch her.

She took another steadying breath and went through her monologue, trying to modulate her performance and keep from being too manic without becoming too static. It seemed to take forever she knew that the monologue would only take a minute or so to get through. When she was finished, Mr. Tillman jotted down a few notes before looking back to her.

“Thank you, Rachel, that was lovely,” he said with a sincere smile. Unlike the production team for Funny Girl where the initial audition was so impersonal, she felt like he genuinely wanted her to do well. “You’re interested in possibly playing Helen and Hermia, correct?”

She nodded. “Yes. I realize that there are a limited number of women’s roles in both plays and I wouldn’t be suitable for several of them.”

“That may be true, and I do give you credit for thinking about that. I’ve had to break it to a lot of actors that the roles they auditioned for just weren’t right for them, but I very often find that young actors are just starting to figure out what they’re capable of. If we thought you’d be better suited in other roles or in the ensemble, would you be okay with that?” Mr. Tillman asked. “They may not be as prominent but there are quite a few parts that often go overlooked.”

She smiled brightly. “Definitely,” she affirmed happily. “I was in the ensemble for our school production and it was a really fulfilling experience.”

Her willingness to accept a supporting role seemed to please him and Mr. Tillman nodded in approval. “Well, we’re definitely going to be in touch with you,” he promised. “We’ll be doing callbacks in the next few weeks once we work through the rest of the auditions. We’ll talk more about what roles might be good for you.”

It’s wasn’t the most overtly enthusiastic response she could have hoped for, but her audition was handled with the same calm professionalism that she saw with Kurt’s and Tina’s. Mr. Tillman had watched her carefully, taking in all aspects of her audition and treated her with respect. Leaving herself open to being cast in roles other than the ones she read for might possibly leave her in the ensemble, but that was better than not getting a role at all. And being in the ensemble wouldn’t be the most terrible thing, she decided. Another chance to learn and grow a bit while still getting to be on a stage. Hopefully she had done enough to get something more.

Kurt was waiting for her with open arms and a reassuring smile. “He loved you,” he insisted, giving her a warm embrace.

“I hope so,” she admitted with a shy smile.

“No, he really did,” Kurt claimed. “If he’s asking you to consider other parts, then he’s thinking seriously about casting you in something. And the ensemble was a lot of fun last summer.”

“Well, I’m not going to lie,” Rachel stated as she gathered up her things. “I’d like to get something more, but I won’t turn down an ensemble role. I know that I really need to develop more as an actor and not depend on my voice so much.”

“At least the two of you are likely to get something,” Tina added. “I’m still a first-year theater student and I don’t have the kind of experience you two got at NYADA. “

“You might be surprised,” Kurt maintained with a smile. “I didn’t expect anything last year and look what happened. In the meantime, we have a little while before we need to catch the train and there’s a nice coffee shop near the station. Let me treat the two of you to a drink before we head back to the city.”

Rachel nodded in agreement. “That sounds like a great idea. Thanks.”

As they walked out of the theater, Kurt noted a young woman with bright auburn hair pulled into a neat braid walking in. She looked up at him with a happy smile of recognition and rushed forward to hug him.

“Oh my God! It’s so good to see you!” she exclaimed, wrapping her arms about him.

“It’s good to see you too, Tracy,” he said in return. “I was hoping that you and Craig would be back this season.”

Rachel then realized that this had been one of Kurt’s castmates from the previous summer and couldn’t help from smiling at seeing his joy at seeing her. Tina turned questioning glance at her, clearly not recognizing the other young woman and Rachel whispered the identity in her ear.

“Craig did his audition last week,” Tracy informed him. “It looks like we’ll have a rookie reunion this summer.”

Kurt laughed brightly. “But we’re not rookies anymore,” he reminded her.

“No, I guess we’re not,” she admitted with a playful grin. “I’m sorry that I couldn’t get over to see you in Les Miz but it was impossible to get tickets!”

Kurt smiled and shook his head. “Oh, don’t worry about that,” he insisted. “I know it’s been a crazy year for all of us.”

“Well, I read all of the reviews and I know how great you all did,” she responded, giving Kurt a playful nudge. He just grinned and motioned for Rachel and Tina to come forward.

“Let me introduce all of you,” he proposed drawing Tina and Rachel forward and making the formal introductions. “You met Rachel and Tina last summer when they came to see me. Rachel’s a classmate of mine and Tina’s over at NYU. I convinced them to audition this year.”

“It’s nice to see both of you again. Kurt always brings the most talented people with him,” Tracy said sincerely. She turned to Kurt and asked, “You read for Puck, didn’t you?”

Kurt nodded with a pleased expression.

“Well, Craig is going to be very put out. He was kind of hoping to get that part, but he won’t stand a chance against you,” Tracy said confidently. “Please tell me that you didn’t read for Lysander too, so I can put his mind at ease that he’s not going to get shut out.”

Kurt couldn’t help from laughing. “I didn’t, but if he’s also reading for Paris, then all bets are off.

“What about Adam?” she asked. “Is he going to be back from his tour in time?”

Kurt couldn’t help from sighing. “He’ll be back, but he’s going to need a break from performing,” he explained. “I really can’t blame him because the tour is taking a lot out of him. He’s trying to get something with the production so he can be a part of the festival without having to worry about a new role.”

“Oh, that’s a real shame,” Tracy said regretfully. “But I’m glad that you’re going to be back this season.”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Kurt admitted with a smile. “Good luck with your audition. We’ll meet up and commiserate when the cast lists come out.”

Tracy smile and nodded to the other two girls. “It was so nice to see you both again,” she said cheerfully. “It’ll be nice to have some more girls around.”

“It’s great to meet you too,” Tina responded with a warm smile. “Good luck at your audition.”

“Thanks. I’d better get going, otherwise I’ll be late,” Tracy said appreciatively before giving Kurt a final hug and disappearing into the theater.

Rachel watched her run into the theater and turned an appraising glance to her friend. “She seems really nice.”

Kurt nodded in confirmation. “It was really great working with her and Craig last summer,” he said agreeably. “I mean, I loved working with Adam and the rest of the cast but it was reassuring to have some people my own age around. Having someone to share being new with made the experience a lot easier.”

Rachel nodded and turned to Tina with a smile. “Then it’s a good thing that you and I are doing this,” she insisted. “And having Kurt show us the ropes.”

“Definitely,” Tina agreed, smiling at her friends.

Kurt gathered them both under his arms and lead them away. “Well, come on, my ladies. I think that coffee and cake is just the kind of thing we need to celebrate your auditions.”

* * *

It was three weeks later that Rachel was leaving her American Playwrights workshop where she had been wrestling with the works of David Mamet when her phone began to ring. She struggled to fish it out of her purse, trying not to drop her books. By the time she’d completed her juggling act, the call had gone to her voice mail. Damn it…

She hurried to a table in the commons area where she could get her things in order and see who was calling, her face paling when she realized just who she’d missed. She quickly redialed the number, mentally sending up a little prayer as the line rang that the news would be good and bit back an audible sigh of relief when the line was picked up.

“Matthew Tillman here.”

Rachel swallowed tightly. “Hi, this is Rachel Berry,” she said, pleased that she was able to keep her tone so even and calm. “I think that I just missed your call.”

“Ah, Rachel… I’m glad that you called back so quickly.”

“I’m sorry that I didn’t answer immediately, but I was just coming out of class,” she explained.

“That’s quite all right,” he assured her. “I figured that you’d be in class. I just wanted to touch base with you about your audition. Now if my notes are correct, you were interested in playing Helen, correct?”

“Yes,” she confirmed. “And Hermina for Midsummer.”

“You also indicated that you would be open to reading for other roles,” he clarified.

“That’s right,” she agreed, hoping that she was playing this right. Even if she ended up in the ensemble for both shows, she very much wanted to be cast in something.

“We’re very interested in you, but we’re getting a lot of interest in those particular roles,” Mr. Tillman informed her honestly. “I’d like for you to come back and read for them again, but I’d also like for you to read for Cassandra in Troilous. I think you might be a good match that part.”

Realizing that she wasn’t being shut out, Rachel felt a smile cross her face. “Of course! I’d be happy to! When would you like me to come in?”

Kurt was walking out of his weapons class, feeling a bit battered because Mr. Hansen spent the past two hours using them all for pounding toys. He could already feel the bruises rising on his skin where he was swatted by the edge of a saber for letting his guard down. He was going to need to spend a good amount of time in the showers after class soaking in the heat and then a liberal application of Arnica cream. Unfortunately, with his fair complexion he bruised like a peach and he was going to look like he got run over by a truck by morning if he didn’t take proper care.

He was not expecting to be collided with by a petite bowling ball that barreled into him at warp speed. He grunted, catching Rachel before she could knock him into the wall and swung her to diffuse the impact.

“Rachel, are you crazy?” he complained, setting her back on her feet. “What is the matter with you?”

“They called me back!” she exclaimed happily, bouncing up and down. “I got a call back!”

The news immediately extinguished Kurt’s irritation and he found himself delighted for his friend. “That’s great! For both parts?” he asked.

She nodded. “Mr. Tillman is also asking me to read for another role,” she explained. “He said that there’s a lot of competition for the ones I read for and suggested another role to consider. That’s good, right?”

“Definitely,” he confirmed. “And it’s great that they still want you to read for the parts that your originally auditioned for. I was already shut out of one part by this point.”

She clutched at his arm, trying to keep her excitement under control. “I’m trying not to read too much into that. I know that I can’t expect to get every part I read for.”

“But being called back is a good sign that they want you for something,” he assured her. “When are you going in?”

“Thursday after my last class. Thankfully I don’t need to be in early on Friday. What about you? They are asking you back right?”

He nodded, looking quietly satisfied which Rachel thought he had every right to feel. After his performances the past summer and this past spring, she thought that they would be insane not to have him back and with any role he wished for.

“I’m going in on Saturday morning,” he explained. “Mr. Tillman is coming in to meet with me because I’ve got to give Isabelle some time with the summer issues going out. The next few weeks are going to be a bit crazed.”

Rachel was delighted that they both were being called in for the parts they read for. “I’m going to call Tina and see if she heard anything,” Rachel informed him. “Because I can’t imagine her not getting a call back. Maybe she and I can do our call backs together.”

“We’ll talk before you go in,” Kurt promised. “I’ll let you know what to expect and how they run things. There’s a good chance that you’ll know what you’re being cast for right there. You just have to remember that you’re new with the festival, so you probably won’t get everything you’re trying for.”

She nodded in understanding. “I’m not expecting that,” she assured him honestly. “I’ll be thrilled to just get one of them.”

She probably would shock anyone who had known her in the past, but she was being completely sincere. To get even one speaking role would be a tremendous accomplishment for her and would go a long way to finally healing over the disappointment that she’d suffered from the Funny Girl debacle. She was working hard to keep her expectations under control and could take real satisfaction that she was getting a call back at all, let alone for all the roles she’d auditioned for.

“Well, I’ve got to get to class,” Rachel said with a sigh. “But do you have a chance to hang out anytime this week? Santana’s been making noises about you making yourself so scarce.”

Kurt chuckled, knowing that his friend’s language probably had been rather colorful on the subject. “We’ll find some time,” he promised. “Maybe we can all go out for dinner one night this week before Santana has to go to the club.”

She nodded before leaning up to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. “I’ll see you a bit later,” she stated. “Have fun with Madam Tibideaux.”

“Thanks. I’m sure that she’s sharpening her knives as we speak,” he quipped.

Fortunately he had just enough time before his session with her to grab a cup of green tea and get his throat in order before arriving at the classroom. Madam Tibideaux hadn’t arrived yet, so he used the time to get his warmups done, knowing very well that she would want to just drive right in.

She arrived a surprisingly ten minutes late, her assistant following quietly in her wake. “My apologies, Mr. Hummel,” the Dean said sincerely. “I had an important phone call with one of our donors who’s been making some considerable contributions to our school after seeing the musical.”

“I used the time to get my warmups out of the way,” he assured her. “I thought that way we wouldn’t lose too much time.”

The Dean smiled and nodded in approval. “Wonderful. Then if you’re ready, I’d like to see how those exercises you’ve been assigned have helping your development.”

Kurt nodded and took his place by the piano. Madam Tibideux nodded to her assistant and a piece of music that he’d become intimately familiar with over the past few days. He closed his eyes, reminding himself of what her expectations would be of him. When the cue came in for him to begin, Kurt was ready.

“The nightingale sighed for the moon’s bright ray,” he sang out, maintaining the balance of strength and gentleness that the aria called for. “And told his tale in his own melodious way. He sang ‘Ah, well-a-day!’

“The lowly vale for the mountain vainly sighed, to his humble wail. The echoing hills replied. They sang ‘Ah, well-a-day!’”

This was more difficult than a lot of the Broadway oriented songs that he’d performed for his teacher in the past. The melody was more complex, requiring him to make the most of his precision and hit each note cleanly while still showing the deep emotion that the song required. The melody was a lot more complex than it initially appeared, making it a real challenge to make sure that he didn’t neglect the emotional component of the song clear while focusing on keeping his vocal technique as clean as possible. It was a real test for her to see just how far he’d come as a singer.

Kurt could understand why his teacher was focusing more on this style of singing. It was pushing him to refine his technique and his natural ability to tap into a song’s emotion. And asking him to perform the song for a traditional romantic lead was clearly designed as a way to compel him to expand his range as an actor.

While Madam Tibideaux would expect that his voice be able to carry the emotional story on its own, she would also expect him to show that he could fully realize the characters and bring in his compete arsenal of acting skills in an effective manner. He softened his expression, looking wistful as he contemplated his character’s beloved. “I know the value of a kindly chorus. But choruses yield little consolation,” he crooned gently, letting his voice float upon the notes played on the piano. “When we have pain and sorrow too before us! I love – and love, alas, above my station!

“A maiden fair to see. The pearl of minstrelsy,” he expressed thoughtfully, trying to paint the image of a young man deeply in love with the woman he could never have. “A bud of blushing beauty, for whom proud nobles sigh. And with each other vie to do her menial’s duty.”

Madam Tibideaux watched him closely, only looking down to make the occasional note on her pad. One might make the mistake to think that after all this time that her sharp observation would no longer be intimidating to students who had ample experience under her tutelage. They would be mistaken.

Kurt would always be aware of his shortcomings. When his newfound technical skill would fail him, or when he was unable to truly grasp the emotional heat of a performance. Those were the moments that he dreaded, because he would be more disappointed in himself than any criticism she could offer.

He knew that he wasn’t going to present the most pristine vocal skills, but he could make sure that he gave a full display of the emotional story. He delved in deep within himself, finding the insecure boy who’d loved someone he felt was so far out of his league. It was a hurt that he was well acquainted with, wishing that the one he’d loved would notice him and remembered the pain of being overlooked or found lacking.

“A suitor, lowly born… with hopeless passion torn, and poor beyond denying,” he sang mournfully, giving full rein to his character’s despair. “Has dared for her to pine, at whose exalted shrine. A world of wealth is sighing.”

Kurt wished that he could get some sense of how he was doing, but Madam Tibideux never gave any sign during her evaluations. Like the Cheshire Cat, she watched and would pass judgement on her own time.

Wanting very much to give her what she wanted, Kurt delved deep and focused. “Unlearned he in aught, save that which love has taught. For love had been his tutor,” he sang, bringing a quiet gentleness to his tone. “Oh, pity… pity me… Our captain’s daughter she, and I that lowly suitor.”

The music drew to a close and Madam Tibideaux was still jotting down her notes, leaving him standing silently and waiting for her verdict. Several long moments passed, and he felt himself starting to fidget before she finally set her pad aside and looked at him expectantly.

“So…” She cocked an appraising eyebrow in his direction, motioning for him to take the seat next to her. This was going to take a while.

“Before I tell you what I think, I’d like to hear your opinion.”

Kurt exhaled deeply, knowing that she fully expected him to be aware of his flaws and if not totally able to self-correct, to at least know where his errors were. Failing to note them would reflect badly on his progress.

“I think that I had a good grasp on the emotional story,” he proposed with a certain confidence. That has never been a serious problem for him and he thought that he’d added some nice nuances. “I tried to translate my own experiences with what the character was trying to express, even if they weren’t a perfect match. But I think that aspect of the performance worked.

“Technique wise...” Kurt took a moment to consider how he’d sung the number before making his self-appraisal. It had been far from his best performance, but it wasn’t completely awful. “Overall it wasn’t bad, but I don’t think that my notes were true at several points. Even though it’s not a fast number, the way the notes are drawn out make them challenging to hold. And I think I sounded a little pitchy at a few points.”

Madam Tibideaux nodded, pleased that he wasn’t trying to excuse his errors and had enough in the way of self-awareness to recognize that he’d made mistakes. But she offered a reassuring smile, not wanting this to be a negative experience for a student that she found so promising.

“I know that this style of music would be a challenge for most singers and I wouldn’t ask most students to attempt it. But given how you used Candide for your audition material, I thought that you’d enjoy the challenge,” she confided, offering a reassuring smile. “The catalogue of Gilbert and Sullivan does lean closer to classical opera than anything you’ll find in conventional musical theater, which is one of the reasons that you’ll primarily see it performed by opera houses nowadays. Students who aren’t focused on classical singing will probably have little experience trying to perform material like this. It’s a very different style and calls for a more refined technique.”

Kurt felt himself nodding in agreement, thinking back to his high school experiences with musicals. They had always stuck to material that wasn’t especially challenging vocally, which wasn’t a surprise given Mr. Schue’s limitations and the lack of formal training in most of the choir. It was been smarter to stick with rock or more modern, well-known musicals that empathized their strengths and downplayed their weaknesses. Even then most of their efforts were underwhelming, in his opinion.

Madam Tibideaux waited until she was confident that he grasped what she was trying to teach him. “Even the similarities in style and structure, Les Miserables is closer to modern musicals than it is to classic opera. The technique that you’d learned up to now allowed you to acquit yourself well as Enjolras, but as we’ve spoken before, you’d only really begun to scratch the surface of your potential as a performer.

“This was meant to be difficult for you because you need to be pushed,” she reminded him. “I expect you to showing weakness in your technique as we move along. If you’re not making mistakes, that means that you’re not trying to grow beyond what you already are capable of. I see a lot of very talented students who are so afraid of being seen as imperfect that they never really get out of their box. Even if you through your entire career never performing material like this, I still think that it’s useful for your development and I’m pleased that you’re not shying away from it.”

Kurt nodded, understanding exactly the point that she was making. Maybe because he’d arrived with so little real training left him more open to being molded, unlike Rachel for example, who came to NYADA with a very clear and rigid view of who she was as a performer and had a difficult time accepting correction. Both of them needed to open themselves up to learning, though someone like Rachel would have to unlearn a great many things as well.

Once she saw that he had a comprehension of what she was explaining, she looked down at her notes. “Now to your credit, you’re not trying to hide behind the music to mask your mistakes. And we’re seeing some real improvement in your technique,” she noted. “As I said, allowing yourself to make mistakes and fail is what’s going to allow you to grow and I’m not expecting you to anywhere close to perfect at this point.

“That’s not to say that there weren’t moments where you were doing everything right and your voice sounded absolutely lovely. I’m seeing very good control of your head and chest voice. You are getting better with manipulating your larynx and I’m seeing a lot more in the way of vocal flexibility. You know your voice well and you’re getting more confident with your control, which is something that I definitely want to see at this point.”

Kurt allowed himself to relax just a tiny bit with the knowledge that it wasn’t all bad.

“But then about halfway though, I think that the melody was starting to get away from you,” his teacher said thoughtfully. “You weren’t sustaining the long notes as cleanly as I usually see from you, which indicates that you’re not getting enough air flow. And there were points where you were overusing your vibrato in a way that wasn’t especially pleasant. You can go a little sharp when you lose control of your upper range and too much vibrato highlights that.”

At seeing that he was paying close attention to her critique and wasn’t resisting her appraisal, she nodded in approval. “But all in all, it wasn’t a bad first effort,” Madam Tibideaux assured him. “I’m pleased that you were catching yourself when you made mistakes and trying to self-correct. You’re paying attention to what you’re doing and are aware when things aren’t going as expected which is probably the most that we could reasonably expect at this stage. Your grasp of melisma is stronger and while this particular run-through was a bit rough around the edges, it’s showing some decent technical bones to build on. You have been practicing, and it shows. What we need to do is build on your skills, continue developing your strength. Because we’ve just begun to explore what you’re going to be capable of as a technician and an artist.”

Kurt listened closely, considering her evaluation and was grateful that it wasn’t as bad as he’d been fearing. He knew by now that however sharply worded her critiques could be, they were all designed to make him a stronger performer. In order to do that, he needed to put his ego on the back burner, be willing to listen and actually accept her tutelage.

He cleared his throat and looked to his teacher. “Can we try it again?” he asked.

The Dean smiled and nodded. “I was just about to suggest that,” she chuckled warmly, motioning for him to take his place by the piano.

He took a quick sip from his water bottle, swishing it about his mouth before swallowing. When he was ready, he nodded to the pianist to begin.

* * *

Sitting at the airport and waiting for a delayed flight was no one’s idea of fun, Adam considered as he looked at the board for what felt like the millionth time but there was no help for that. A nasty storm front moving through the middle of the country had grounded their plane for at least the next few hours. Far longer than the actual flight was supposed to take.

Fortunately, they weren’t due to open in Minneapolis for a week, so losing the better part of a day wasn’t going to be that bad. They would have plenty of time to settle in and get used to the new stage before opening night. The biggest issue was boredom while they waited for any word about their flight. The group had dispersed to find their own amusements while they waited, with Niall roaming the shops to see if he could find a nice little gift to send to his wife. Adam decided to wait until when he was sure that Kurt would be on a break between classes. He had texted Kurt, telling him to call when he was free.

In the meantime, Adam was able to find a café with only moderately overpriced coffee and a relatively quiet corner of the waiting area where he could do some writing while he killed time. They had just gotten another announcement that the delay would be for at least one more hour when his phone began to ring. Seeing Kurt’s number come up on the screen, he closed his laptop and turned his full attention to the call.

“Good morning, darling,” he greeted happily, his mood immediately improving. “I hope that I’m not bothering you.”

“Not at all,” Kurt assured him cheerfully. “I just got out of class when I saw your text. Is everything okay?”

Adam sighed. “Just cooling my heels at the airport. Our flight was delayed, and we’re stuck here for a bit. We probably could have driven to Minneapolis in less time.”

“Oh, poor baby,” Kurt cooed teasingly, causing Adam to smile a bit in response. “But I’m sure that the plane will be more comfortable than a bus. Are you okay?”

“I just wanted to hear your voice,” Adam admitted. “And I had a question for you... Did you ever get around to getting your passport?”

“Not yet,” Kurt admitted. “I keep meaning to look into getting one, but things have been so busy and I haven’t really needed it.”

Adam smiled wider. “Then, my dear, you’d better get your application submitted. Because you’re coming with me to London this winter.”

“I am?” Kurt exclaimed. “Adam, that’s very sweet of you but you’re going there to work, and…”

“And I want you there with me, at least for a little while during your winter break,” Adam insisted. “Whatever time you can give. I want to be able to show London to you and my family is already making plans for you to visit them. You can’t let me disappoint them.”

Adam knew his young lover better than most and was quite aware of his habit being mindful of not overstepping so that he didn’t intrude where he didn’t deserve to be. Kurt’s sense of propriety and consideration could often go into overdrive and he wouldn’t put himself in a position where he might distract Adam during what would be the highlight of his career thus far. He’d want Adam to have the freedom to reap all the rewards of his accomplishments without giving any kind of appearance that he was trying to ride on his lover’s coattails.

Which was utter bullocks, as far as Adam was concerned. What good was all of this if he couldn’t enjoy it with the man he loved?

“I won’t take no for an answer,” he warned with a smile and gentle firmness in his voice. “London is absolutely beautiful during the holidays and I want you there with me. Please… don’t make me beg, love.”

He heard Kurt sigh on the other end of the phone. “You’re making that pitiful, homeless puppy face, aren’t you?” he accused.

“If that’s what it takes to get you to come with me,” Adam warned. “Or if necessary, I’ll just sic Mum on you.”

He could positively picture Kurt’s frown. “Oh, that’s not fair,” Kurt accused petulantly.

“Well, you’ll be the one to tell Mum that you don’t want to come visit with her,” Adam teased. “I’m sure that she’ll be very understanding that you’d rather putter about New York by yourself than let her spoil you and take you shopping...

That brought a laugh out of the younger man. “All right… you don’t have play rough.”

“You like it when I play rough,” Adam growled playfully.

Kurt laughed again. “Don’t threaten what you can’t finish,” he teased. “At least I’ll finally get to shop at Harrods.”

“Harrods is totally overrated, but it is a bit of fun during the Christmas season,” Adam insisted. “Oh, sweetheart, I can’t for you to see it. Big Ben, the changing of the guard… we’ll do all the touristy things. And when I’m working, Mum and Dad want to take you to Essex for a day or two. You’ll get to see where I grew up and have them take you around. You can’t disappointment them.”

“Of course not,” Kurt agreed. “Because I wouldn’t put it past her to hop onto a plane and carry me off in a burlap sack.”

Adam knew that Kurt’s resistance would dissolve like wet tissue paper with the right inducements and he’d certainly laid out his best argument for Kurt to just comply graciously. They’d hoped to make a trip to England before this, but with his work and Kurt’s schooling, they never managed to find the time. This was a better reason than most to finally make that trip and he hated the idea of another few weeks spent apart.

“I’m sorry if I sound like I’m pushing so hard,” Adam granted. “But we’ve been apart long enough for the time being, don’t you think?”

Kurt didn’t answer immediately, but Adam could easily picture the softening in his gorgeous eyes and the soft smile touching his features.

“I think you might be right,” Kurt admitted.

An announcement came on over the system that Adam’s flight would start boarding in thirty minutes, causing him to sign in relief.

“Finally!” he exclaimed.

“They’re calling your flight?”

“Yes… we’ll be boarding soon,” Adam confirmed. “I’d better go round up Niall so he doesn’t miss the flight.”

“Then I’d better let you go,” Kurt offered. “Have a good flight.”

Adam couldn’t help from smiling. “I’ll call you when you’re checked into the hotel,” he promised. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Kurt returned gently. “Talk to you later.”

Ending calls was always hard, Adam thought as he reluctantly hung up the phone. Giving up that tenuous connection caused near physical pain when all he wanted to do was pull Kurt into his arms and never let go. The longer he was away from home, the more he craved Kurt’s presence. Some relationships fell apart with prolonged distance, he knew. Others grew stronger.

He and Kurt were proving to be of that material. And he knew that it was only a matter of time before their time apart would end. At least for now, he realized. It was nearly unavoidable that their profession might require them to work away from one another, but he now was confident that they would not only survive but thrive. Both as individuals and a couple.

* * *

With Funny Girl, Rachel had gotten a brutal reality check about the business that she aspired to and it had been a hard realization that the world didn’t see her as the budding star that she’d imagined herself to be. Learning that she would have to fight for her place in the world, and that she would fail at least as often as she succeeded, had been a harsh wake up call.

But it was one that she’d very much needed, she could recognize in hindsight. And she realized that just maybe Kurt had it right by making a smaller production his first foray into professional acting. Admittedly, she much preferred the more intimate process that the Garrison Festival utilized over the cattle call of Funny Girl. She actually felt like the director was paying attention to her and that she wasn’t just a face in the crowd.

Rachel was very aware that she wouldn’t always have this luxury, and that she would have to deal with open calls for the roles she wanted. But getting proper feedback and a chance to grow as a performer made putting herself up for judgement worthwhile, even if she didn’t get the role that she wanted.

When she stepped out of the theater into the warm afternoon sunshine, she felt that odd disconnect that she’d felt after the Funny Girl callback, but for an entirely different reason. Her mind was still trying to come to terms with what had happened inside the theater, but this time she didn’t have to deal with it alone.

“I can’t believe it,” Tina said, her dark eyes shining as they walked out of the theater. “We did it.”

Rachel felt herself nodding, but it hadn’t really hit her yet. She got a part. A real part.

“You were amazing,” she praised the younger girl. “I’m so glad that you got Hippolyta.”

“What about you, ‘Cassandra’?” Tina retorted. “You’re going to have so much fun playing her and Moth.”

Rachel couldn’t help from grinning happily, amused at no end to be playing a character with the same name as the teacher who’d bedeviled her for nearly the whole of her time at NYADA. “With us and Kurt in the same shows, it’s almost going to feel like a mini-New Directions production.”

And it would be, Rachel told herself confidently. She had full assurance that Kurt would get at least one of the roles he was getting a callback for. She would not be at all surprised if he managed to land speaking roles in both plays, because he certainly had the talent to warrant it.

She was grateful that while she and Tina had auditioned for the same shows that they hadn’t gone after the same parts. While she was sure that she would have been able to handle it if Tina had gotten a role over her, she was happy that they didn’t need to put themselves into direct competition just yet. This would be nothing but good memories for the both of them.

As the reality of her role began to sink in, she felt the anxiousness that she’d felt right before the callback fade and the excitement over what she’d achieved began to sink in. There would be phone calls to be made to her delighted parents and her friends. Then they just had to wait for Kurt’s callback for them to really celebrate.

* * *

Even when one was reasonably confident that they were likely to be successful to some degree, callbacks were always nerve wreaking. Kurt was secure in his own abilities as an actor and knew how much he had developed over the past year. He knew that he could bring something really special to the roles that he had auditioned for, but there was no way to know how other actors had been received. He could only do his best and hope that he was better.

He was thrilled that Rachel and Tina had survived their auditions and he was thrilled that they both managed to land speaking and ensemble roles. For Rachel, it had been especially gratifying when she was told that she would play Cassandra in Troilus and Kurt had wanted to take her out to celebrate, but she insisted on waiting until he knew what roles he was playing. She wanted to make sure that they all celebrated together because in her mind, there was no chance of him not getting cast.

Her confidence in him was gratifying and certainly gave him a bit more confidence heading into his callback. He wasn’t the surprise new kid anymore and the expectations for him were much higher. He had to bring his best game if he wanted to impress Mr. Tillman this time around.

He arrived at the theater to find Mr. Tillman waiting, along with several other members of the production team. “Good morning, Kurt,” the director greeted, shaking Kurt’s hand. “Thanks for coming in today.”

“Thank you for accommodating me,” Kurt said sincerely. “I’m sorry for getting you up so early on a Saturday.”

The older man just smiled. “It’s not a problem at all. I know that your school schedule can be a bit insane,” he insisted. “Well, we have a lot to get through, so why don’t we get started?”

Kurt nodded in agreement, stepping up onto the stage. “Should I start with reading for Paris?”

“Sounds good,” Mr. Tillman agreed and settled into a seat so he could give the actor his full attention.

Kurt had all his monologues committed to memory and knew how he wanted to portray each of the characters. Paris was the young romantic, blinded by his love for Helen and responsible for plunging his nation into war as a result, but unrepentant for it. Patroclus was a great warrior in his own right, a fact nearly overshadowed by his profound sense of loyalty to Achilles. Both were in some ways peripheral to the main focus of the storyline, the doomed love of the title characters, but they were vital to the course of action.

And then there was Puck… the fae trickster that was far too clever for his own good and created mischief and havoc wherever he went. Kurt wanted to portray him as having a bit of an edge; less the innocent sprite that he often was portrayed as and more of a trickster out of classical mythology that could cause conflict for nothing more than his own amusement.

“My mistress, with a monster, is in love,” he pronounced with a rather deranged giggle at the fairy queen’s expense. “Near to her close and consecrated bower. While she was in her dull and sleeping our, a crew of patches, rude mechanicals that work for bread upon Athenian stalls.”

He leaned forward, as if divulging some great joke. “Were met together to rehearse a play intended for great Theseus’ nuptial day,” he explained with a wry smile and a twinkle of near madness in his eyes. “The shallowest thick-skin of that barren sort, who Pyramus presented, in their sport.

“Forsook his scene and enter’d in a brake. When I did him, at this advantage take, an ass’s nole I fixed on his head!”

He broke down with laughter at his own cunning, going on to describe how Puck had managed to catch Titania in his web of spells and tricks and taking delight in the queen’s humiliation and uncaring about the harm that he might have done an innocent mortal. He’d seen enough bullies in his life to know exactly how to play out the tricks and by letting Puck show the cruelty inherent in his actions, Kurt was confident would set him apart from all the other performers.

When he was finished, Mr. Tillman took a few moments to confer with the other members of the production team before turning to Kurt with a broad grin,

“Well, thank you Kurt,” he said sincerely. “We were hoping to see maturing from you as a performer and you certainly didn’t disappoint. That was, for me, one of the most interesting takes on Puck that I’ve seen in a long time. The edge of malevolence was very different than most impressions of the character.”

Kurt nodded, glad that his intentions carried through the performance. “That was exactly what I was going for,” he confirmed. “I really wanted to avoid any comparisons to the way Micky Rooney played him. I know that’s the archetype for the character, but I wanted to give him a totally different vibe. Maybe a little more Loki than usually gets portrayed.”

Mr. Tillman looked quite pleased with his answer. “Well, I certainly hope that you plan to develop the character farther this season because Puck is always a highlight of the show. I think that you’re going to bring something very interesting for our audience. It’s good to challenge their expectations once in a while.

“Now as for Troilus… we’re a little bit conflicted,” Mr. Tillman admitted. “I think that you’d acquit yourself admirably in both parts but I want to make sure that we’re giving you a role that will really take advantage of what you bring to the table. You’ve been taking stage combat, correct?”

Kurt nodded, wondering where this was going. “I’m in my second semester of training,” he confirmed.

Mr. Tillman made a note and nodded in approval. “With several of our more seasoned performers moving on, we have a definite shortage of actors with combat training this year and there are some battle scenes in Troilus. I also am of a mind to take advantage of the chemistry you had with Ben last season. We’ve cast him as Achilles and the two of you worked well together, which is why I’m inclined to cast you as Patroclus.

“Now, one thing to keep in mind is that I’m intending to play up the closeness between Achilles and Patroclus and make it obvious that they are more than just comrades,” the director explained, watching for his reaction to the proposition. “The play itself doesn’t shy away from the inuendo, but we’re going to make it a bit more clear about the nature of their relationship and give some more focus to their motivations. Is that something that would be an issue for you?”

Kurt kept his expression neutral as he considered the idea. He wouldn’t mind working with Ben again, and there was always the possibility that the show would want to explore that aspect of the characters’ relationship. While he couldn’t help from wondering if being gay was a factor in the casting, he wouldn’t allow that to bother him. There would be enough times where his sexuality might keep him out of roles so taking advantage now, it that was indeed the case, wouldn’t bother him too much.

“Not at all,” he assured the director. “I know that their relationship isn’t a major focus of the play, but it would add some interesting nuances and draw some contrasts with the other love stories.”

Mr. Tillman looked extremely pleased with his response and gave a firm nod of approval. “Then it looks like we’re set. I know that we’re putting a lot of pressure on you this season, Kurt, but I think that you’re up to the challenge.”

Kurt grinned and hopped off the stage to shake Mr. Tillman’s hand. “Thank you so much,” he said sincerely.

The director just smiled. “We’re very happy to have you back this season,” he insisted. “It’s always wonderful to welcome new actors and watch them develop, and we have high expectations for you. I think that these plays are going to give you a lot to really sink your teeth into.

“We’ll be in touch about all the administrative stuff and send you the rehearsal schedule. I need to you start committing your roles to memory because things are going to move quickly once rehearsals start and you’re going to have a lot on your plate.”

Kurt nodded in understanding. “I definitely will,” he assured the older man. After shaking the director’s hand again and thanking him, Kurt gathered his things and left the theater with a bit of a well-deserved spring in his step.

That evening found him in Bushwick, toasting the success of his friends while they toasted his. He sat on the floor with Rachel and Tina, sharing a bottle of cheap but still very drinkable rosé and several containers of take out food. He would have plenty of time to stress about the hard work facing him, but right now he just wanted to celebrate with two of his best friends.

They wouldn’t always be so fortunate, so this was a rare moment of success for them to savor.

* * *

Kurt's solo: "The Nightingale" - H.M.S . Pinafore

[theliterateape]

Losing Friends Over Cultural Lines in the Sand

by Don Hall

I arrived in Las Vegas, my new home, a fully vetted Utopian. I lived in the progressive bubble of Chicago (remarkably an urban blue area sequestered in a fully red state) for thirty years. I dated for four years a woman committed thoroughly to Marxist dogma (despite her love for $500 leather boots and expensive restaurants). Her godfather (and loosely defined friendly acquaintance of mine) is none other than the former Weather Underground's Bill Ayers.

Just prior to moving west, I had a few run-ins with the increasingly strident Utopian class. Regardless of my intentions, I became casualty to the burgeoning power of the online mob in the most minor of ways. I wasn't as purely defined by the increased rigidity of thought required for membership.

Granted, I was still so filled with fury over the embarrassment of a Donald Trump presidency, I brought a version of that inflexible unreasoning along with me.

On the casino floor during the four-month lockdown, the only staff present were the managers, the security officers, and the engineers. Our General Manager figured that we should take the down time of the place as an opportunity to 'clean things up.' As one of the managers, I had the keys, so I interacted with the staff all day long.

Rodrigo was an engineer. Young, bulked up with workouts and steroids, and a true Trump supporter. We worked well together as long as we avoided the topic of politics.

"So how long do you think we have to live with this Chinese virus?"

It was a simple enough question but his parroting of Trump's insistence to racialize COVID set me off and fast. I completely lost it. I told him it was racist language, that he was a worthless human being, that I no longer wanted anything to do with him. 

I immediately felt bad. I could see the hurt in his eyes. I had to walk it off and wrestled with the very necessary impulse to apologize versus the idea that apologizing would weaken my anti-Trump position. Eventually, the next day, I did apologize but the damage had been done. He and I never joked anymore and he kept his distance from me.

This incident made me dive into my behavior. It caused me to reflect upon the tactic of barking at him when calmly discussing our opinions may have been far more fruitful. I treated him as an enemy when he was anything but hostile to me. I remembered something I used to tell the student teachers who would come through my classes for college credit: when you lose your temper, you lose everything else as well.

Thus began a journey for myself to soften my rhetoric, chill out on the histrionics, and attempt to be more rational. Not an easy task given thirty years in the Utopian bubble but a step forward.

I had no idea how many friends I would lose from repositioning my reactions to political rhetoric.

PK was a Chicago friend. A real friend. We had done a few shows together, he was one of the funniest guys I knew. When he performed a one-man show at Second City, I was there opening night. When he needed a gig for the summer, I hired him to usher at Millennium Park and overlooked his health issues that prevented him from walking around in the Chicago summer heat (a principal requirement for the job).

He and I didn't see eye-to-eye on everything political but we were both dyed-in-the-wool Lefties so the arguments were generally good-spirited debates rather than throw-downs of competing orthodoxy. Then the HBO documentary series about Woody Allen came out.

He in Chicago; I in Vegas. Connected by, of course, Faceborg. He started a thread demonizing Allen. I responded by stating I didn't think he was guilty (and, in fact, was taken to court and exonerated).

Things got ugly incredibly fast. It went from disagreement to personal insult in three exchanges. He accused me of becoming the very thing he despised. I was worthless. I was a victim-shamer. I had allowed the skirmishes with the Radical Utopians before I left to shape my entire worldview.

I, of course, argued back for a bit. Then I realized that this was accomplishing nothing. I don't know Woody Allen. He has never invited me into his personal business. My only connection with the man are his films and that's how it should be. This was unacceptable in PK's view and he denounced me publicly for a few days until I finally cut him off.

I was no victim here. That's not the narrative I'm selling. I was an eager participant and threw a few unnecessary right hooks his way publicly as well. Unfortunately, my refusal to acquiesce to his demand of fealty to a perspective I thought (and think) was more complicated than a skewed hit piece on HBO presented was too much for our prior friendship to carry. We were no longer friends.

Over Woody Allen.

I lost another Chicago buddy over my insistence that Louis CK was a comic genius. Instead of an argument, he just erased me.

I have since removed myself from most social media. You wanna talk to me, you gotta talk to me.

when you lose your temper, you lose everything else as well

This past weekend, another friend who has renounced me on her social media (at least, so she says) was incensed by my latest "I Believe..." column. Specifically, she was infuriated that I wrote "...that Rittenhouse shot and killed white Antifa dudes who were chasing him down. Making a case for white supremacy here is a bit sticky, doncha think?"

She emailed me.

"You understand that if Rittenhouse had been black, he'd be dead right now? How irresponsible of you. Goddamn, Don."

I replied. 

"What evidence do you have that supports that if he'd been black he'd be dead? I'm all about that juicy evidence, you know. Please send me some links that support the statement and I'll be happy to reframe my perspective."

"Evidence? That black people never get acquitted for a self-defense charge? Are you kidding me? What has Nevada done to you?"

I sent her an email with a few links.

St. Paul man who shot at MPD in self-defense acquitted of all charges by jury

Black man acquitted of killing white man after race dispute

Erie woman, 67, acquitted in fatal stabbing of daughter's boyfriend; self-defense prevails

Nightclub slaying: Security guard ‘not guilty’ on all charges

Andrew Coffee IV found not guilty on all counts of murder, attempted first degree murder

"As far as I can see there are at least 27 pages on Google of these cases, all within that past three years. I'm certainly not arguing that Rittenhouse was a hero. The prosecution fucked it. I am suggesting that your assertion is false—black people all over the country kill people in self defense and are acquitted in court."

Her response? 

"Fuck you, Don. I hope you fucking get COVID and die. You used to be someone to talk to for some kind of wisdom but you're as bad as any other white supremist."

Mind you, she and I have been close friends for years. She's a journalist. A journalist who has chosen ideology over factual information. 

I guess I shouldn't be surprised by that, though.

"An evolution from the stodgy paper of record into a juicy collection of great narratives"? Are they joking? The New York Times, the most important and influential paper of record in the country, is now evolving into a collection of stories? Abandon the realz, go for the feelz.

My former friend seems to be on track with that.

Finally, an email from a long since distanced friend from college. Apparently, while he and I haven't communicated in decades, he keeps up with Literate Ape and decided to let me know his feelings about my latest book.

"Dear Don,

I want you to know that I've been following your writing for some time and I'm noticing a trend that concerns me. I purchased your latest book (More Spock, Less Kirk) and you have four essays about white privilege in there that make you seem like a complete racist.

You were always a bit of an asshole but never a racist. I can't believe that you have gone so far down the bend as to have become a GOP white nationalist but the proof, as they say, is in the pudding."

My response:

"Yo!

Long time, dude. It's interesting to hear that based on my stance on the concept of white privilege (that it is more religious than pragmatic and that there is no solid evidence to prove that it exists at all beyond that amorphous 'lived experience' series of anecdotal support) you see the GOP in my writing.

To date, I believe in equality of opportunity for all Americans, universal healthcare, accessible and excellent education for all citizens, equal treatment under the law with no regard to wealth or race, effective and just reparations for the crimes of the past (specifically addressing the ugly discrimination done against American blacks), due process and accountability for those in authority positions, and accessible and excellent financial safety nets for our least able.

What part of that smacks of GOP white nationalist?"

I received no answer. I'm unsurprised.

A 2021 national survey by pollster John Zogby found a plurality of Americans (46%) believed a future civil war was likely, 43% felt it was unlikely, and 11% were not sure. War seemed more likely for younger people (53%) than older ones (31%), and for those residing in the South (49%) and Central/Great Lakes region (48%) relative to those in the East (39%).

Even when taken with a grain of salt (given that 15% of Americans agree with the QAnon allegation that “the government, media, and financial worlds in the U.S. are controlled by a group of Satan-worshipping pedophiles who run a global child sex trafficking operation" and 2% of Americans believe the planet is flat) 46% is still significant.

On the other hand, "About three in four Americans (74%) agree that America has always been a force for good in the world, including 19% who completely agree with this idea and a majority (55%) who mostly agree. One in four (24%) disagree, including 17% who mostly disagree and 7% who completely disagree. In 2013, slightly more Americans (79%) believed their country has always been a force for good in the world." — SOURCE

The optimist in me takes heart at that 74%. I'm certain to lose a few more friends—the ones most concerned with my shift away from the Utopian viewpoint but with a more cemented relationship with me basically avoid my views on politics and I respect that. The friends I will lose will be of that 7% and I don't mourn that loss any more than I grieve the fact that I have no friends who are white supremicists or rapists.

My very utopian niece and I have agreed, for instance, to never discuss race. I'm completely fine with this as she is my blood and I'll love her even if I think she's wrong about certain things. I hope she feels the same way. We'll certainly see this upcoming Christmas holiday.

I have a friend in Vegas who believes that the booster vaccines are soy-boosters designed to strip us of our masculinity. I still got my booster shot, feel plenty masculine, and he and are still friends. Another friend is a hardcore fiscal conservative who worships at the altar of Milton Friedman. He knows I think he's full of shit but we don't hold it against each other.

I wrote some years ago, prior to leaving Lake Michigan for Lake Mead, a piece entitled *The Company You Keep Defines Who You Are*:

I'm thinking that, rather than "You are the average..." the more accurate statement is "You are the person whom the five people you spend the most time with train you to be." The idea that people train us to be a certain way sounds odd until you think about the tendency to let domestic abusers reign unchallenged or disapproving parents cause such misery. Our friends and loved ones teach us who we are by how they reward or punish us in small and large ways.

If the experiment is "You are the person whom the five people you spend the most time with train you to be," look around yourself and ask if the person you are, based on the five people you spend the most time with, is someone you are proud or ashamed to be? And if you find yourself ashamed, time to get some new fucking friends.

The company I want to keep are people who can disagree about issues without losing their shit, who can listen and change their minds when presented evidence contrary to their opinion, and who understand that when you lose your temper, you lose everything else as well.

[warforthecrown]

Session 1: All The King’s Men

It promised to be a day for the ages, the exaltation of a commoner to noble status, an historic vote in the Senate, and possibly a new way of life for the people of Taldor. Just how influential this day would be could not be overstated.

They had each been hired separately by Lady Martella Lotheed, to assist her in her political ventures this Exaltation Day. Working towards the removal of the ancient law of primogeniture, the law that only the firstborn son could inherit, was a dream nearly made reality. Only this vote in the Senate remained. However for this to be made so, certain political alliances had to be formed, and broken. The need for “senatorial aides” was clear.

Gladius Auger was hired to find the true motives of Duke Centimus and Countess Aribelle Pace.

Alphonse Hallace had been hired to make sure certain donated artifacts would... disappear, to embarrass Earl Calhadion Vernisant, and weaken his position.

Norelor had been hired to convince the popular Baron Nicolaus Okerra to come around to a more forward thinking position, so that he in turn could influence others.

Jaul Stonebarry was hired as an assistant, to run between the others, and make sure that all jobs were completed in time.

Each of the “aides” were given a senate aide badge of an extinct family line, the Voritas family. These would allow them access to the gala, though make it clear they were guests and not able to vote, and also give them the ability to communicate with Lady Lotheed.

While standing in line to be allowed in, Jaul practiced his skills as a cutpurse, relieving a nearby noble of a few gold pieces, which he then immediately spent on commemorative flags being sold by a nearby merchant, distributing them amongst his new co-workers. Thankfully, before any more mischief could be done, they were pulled out of line by a guard for a random search, actually a guard with whom they shared a “mutual friend”. Having been cleared to enter, the group was allowed to ascend the steps into the Senate.

At first the group spread out to mingle in the Arcade of Triumphs, a small museum of Taldor’s history and military might. Norelor seemed somewhat bored as she scanned the crowd for anyone of note. Gladius quickly engaged the curator in discussion about the care of the artifacts within the Arcade, while Jaul and Alphonse quietly found the objects donated by Earl Vernisant. They were able to remove a couple of objects with no trouble, but it would take time and skill to take all of them.

Soon a crowd began to gather in the courtyard, as Princess Eutropia had arrived without being announced. She climbed atop a wall, giving an impassioned speech about the events to be held. While this was happening, Gladius noticed a servant taking some kind of alchemical creation towards a nearby apiary. The servant had been told it would calm the bees, but Gladius knew it would do the opposite! By stopping the servant, he narrowly averted disaster. After the speech, the group had some time to mingle, or to go about their assigned duties. Jaul easily stole another two artifacts, but the final one proved difficult for both him and Alphonse, until a clever plan using Alphonse’s raven familiar led to the buckler being taken and simply tossed over the courtyard wall. One task had been completed!

Norelor was not much of a politician, and she found herself exploring the Senate building more than talking, though she eventually found her way to the Senate Floor itself, where she found Baron Okerra, and the soon to be made Lord Kalbio. Her impassioned speech about the change of laws, and great beauty impressed the Baron, and entranced Kalbio, who had been feeling somewhat overwhelmed by all the attention. Baron Okerra began to understand that holding onto laws for laws sake was not helpful. Kalbio continued to follow Norelor throughout the night, and was delighted when she gave him the flag that Jaul had bought while they had been in the queue! Everyone was very surprised when Princess Eutropia was able to recognise the two of them, even in the crowd.

Gladius first made his way to the archives, where Duke Centimus was. A friendly, if awkward half-elf, Duke Centimus had lost the use of his legs in a riding accident some years ago, and hated being seen as only his injury. Gladius and the Duke were able to connect on their shared love of history, and the Duke revealed that a lot of the history of Taldor was actually struck from record, especially more... controversial subjects. The Duke was strongly on the side of Lady Lotheed and Princess Eutropia, as he believed that someone’s ability to rule was determined by their ability, not their gender or physical condition.

Lady Lotheed then called her aides together to discuss where things had gotten to, and to warn them of the presence of known bully Dame Malphene Trant. The aides would have to keep an eye out for her, her lackeys, and any trouble they may cause.

Soon Jaul found a small, out of the way area, and knew exactly what to do with it. He pulled a minor noblewoman away, and had some fun. Soon, another (her choice) joined them.

As Countess Pace was in the Gallery, Gladius and Alphonse attempted to entertain the children along with Wyssilka the Fantabulous and her troupe. Gladius was surprisingly good at entertaining children, but Alphonse was not. However between the two of them, they found that the Countess was willing to do whatever it took to gain influence, including voting in whatever way they majority went. Clearly, more work would be needed to influence her within the Senate.

It was then that Dame Trant appeared on the Gallery, roughly pushing a Junior Senator into a side room. The aides rushed to assist Junior Senator Dou, and were able to diffuse the situation before a fight could break out. They were then all distracted by the sudden arrival of the Grand Prince.

Trumpets sounded, red carpets rolled out, as Grand Prince Stavian III arrived at the Senate Building... and promptly disappeared into private meetings. In order to calm the confused guests, a light supper was brought out. Alphonse found he did not enjoy the food very much, and Jaul found he much preferred the serving staff, inviting another two people into his now very full “Nookie Nook”.

Following supper, the Senate convened. A number of minor votes and reports were held, and finally the vote that all had come to see. A great deal of arguments and debates occurred, and finally the vote was held. The final vote ended with 36 abstentions, 107 votes for, and 79 against. The law of primogeniture was repealed, and the Senate recognised Princess Eutropia Stavian I as the heir to the crown.

While waiting for the final statements by Grand Prince Stavian, Lady Lotheed pulled her aides aside and thanked them for all the work they had done this night, though she seemed a little exasperated with Jaul. There would be the Exaltation of Kalbio the Weaver to nobility, and the night would be done.

Everyone crammed into the Senate Floor as Stavian stood above them, Kalbio by his side, as Stavian made his speech 

“I’m sure many of you have had the opportunity to meet Kalbio here. He is a man of the people, elevated at the urging of all the ladies, lords, senators, and aides present in this chamber. I think we should all give him a rousing applause, to commemorate this momentous change in his life.”

After the applause abated, Stavian continued

“I understand your parents sacrificed everything to help you reach this day, my boy. Saving up for your apprenticeship and the tools you needed to achieve greatness. And today you are a grateful son, no doubt making them proud. I too understand what it is to sacrifice; I have given so much for the people of this nation: a brother, a son, a lifetime of service. Even my own daughter’s loyalty. But unlike you, Lord Kalbio, these Taldans—my children, truly—are not grateful. They scheme and plot, dream of hanging their dutiful father and placing a woman—a woman, sir!—on the Lion Throne! And they have seen fit this very day to induct you into their conspiratorial ranks. And that is why here, now, you, Lord Kalbio, will be the first among them to die.”

Stavian plunged his dagger between Kalbio’s ribs, and the Senate was sprayed with his blood.

In the sudden rush of anger and confusion, Prince Stavian’s guard began attacking the assembled nobility. Those who had weapons or magic jumped to fight, but the guards had been better prepared. Blood made the floor of the chamber slick, and the aides attempted to help fight, but as the guards came with their greatswords... a flash came from the aides badges, and there was only darkness and the smell of earth.

[dutifullymadameashley]

Stonathan Fanfiction: A Study in Attraction: Chapter 9

Reluctant to leave Troy’s side, Steve attempted to make himself comfortable on the living room sofa. For a long time he was too anxious to rest. When sleep did come, it was fraught with confusing, unpleasant dreams.

One moment he was swimming in a placid pool, the next he was being pulled beneath the surface with gut-wrenching force. He struggled for air, thrashing against his unseen enemy until an eerie serenity ensued. He felt warm hands on his face, coaxing his weakened body to the surface. The invisible adversary defeated, tender lips caressed his own and he grew heady with the scent of Love’s Baby Soft.

Just as Steve was relaxing into Nancy’s touch, he was once again dragged down into the deep, his opponent stronger this time and somehow more familiar. On the verge of tears, he was seized by the shoulders and ruthlessly shaken, his father’s whisky-tinged breath stinging his eyes and turning his stomach, even as firm fingers were grasping his arm and yanking him from the suffocating water.

A warm mouth closed over his gasping lips, breathing fresh air into his lungs then withdrawing to whisper into his ear, “We can go wherever we please /and everything depends upon / how near you stand to me.” Steve’s heart raced as Jonathan began to kiss his neck but soon Troy’s disgusted voice was interrupting his pleasure: “You’re one of them, aren’t you? I knew it.”

The hurtful words were still echoing in his mind as Steve became aware of another distinct sound. The phone was ringing, its digital gurgle so close at his ear that it seemed to emanate from within his skull. He stretched, his eyes flying open at the unexpected sensation of cool leather against his bare skin.

It was morning and he was back in his living room with Troy, who continued to snore on the nearby loveseat. The elder Harrington sat up, pushed aside the damp towel he’d been using as a pillow and tugged the vibrating receiver from between the sofa cushions, pressing the talk button. “Harrington residence,” he announced, trying for an alertness that he wasn’t feeling, and praying to God that it wasn’t his father on the line.

“Steve?” Jonathan’s tone was all concern, as unnerving as it was sweet.

Steve breathed a silent sigh of relief. “Hey, Byers, how’s it going?” he drawled, yawning into the phone in an effort to establish a façade of calm.

“My mom and I are going to bring your car around, if that’s all right. Will you be home for the next fifteen minutes or so?” Byers sounded confused by Harrington’s casual tone, but didn’t question it.

Steve stood and placed a gentle hand on his brother’s forehead. No fever, no damp. “Yeah. Totally. Come on by,” he said softly into the phone, then hung up.

“Troy. Troy, wake up. You’ve got to take these,” he whispered, nudging the boy awake and gesturing at the aspirin and water that had gone untouched on the coffee table from previous night.

The boy squinted at his older brother with a disoriented, unhappy look, and Steve half-expected to be subject to more of the verbal nastiness from his nightmare. Instead, Troy’s face crumpled and he burst into tears.

**************

Steve had just gotten his troubled brother settled in bed when the doorbell rang. Clad in only his pajama bottoms, he debated throwing on a T-shirt but reconsidered on the off chance that his toplessness would prove distracting enough to spare him an interrogation by Jonathan. His day had already started terribly, the last thing he needed now was to have an emotional breakdown on his front porch.

Taking a deep breath, he opened the door and greeted Byers with a forced smile meant to convey a specific message: “I’m fine. You’re fine. Everything’s fine.” By the sadness in Jonathan’s eyes, it was clear that Steve was deceiving no one.

“Hey,” Byers said quietly, hands jammed into the pockets of his jacket. “How is…everything?”

Steve exhaled, buying himself some time with a glance at the rusty Pinto parked in his driveway. Joyce gave a little wave through the windshield, and he brought two fingers to his brow in a shy salute.

Turning to meet Jonathan’s expectant gaze, Harrington sighed and briefly relayed Troy’s version of events from the previous night: meeting up with a couple guys at the arcade, plans for a sleepover at Dylan’s house shelved when an older boy produced a half-empty bottle of vodka from his knapsack. Between the four of them, the boys succeeded in polishing off the booze in the back alley and Troy had made his slow way home, throwing up every few blocks.

“Jesus,” Jonathan muttered. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, he’s going to be all right,” Steve replied, as much to convince himself as anyone else.

“No, I mean, you – are you okay?” Byers corrected, moving to place his hand on Steve’s bare shoulder then - seeming to recall Joyce in the waiting car - reconsidered and shoved it back into his pocket. “I know if Will did something like that I’d be…pretty messed up.”

“Yeah, mostly I’m just dreading my parents coming home and finding out…somehow this will end up being my fault and then….” Steve didn’t elaborate, but judging by Jonathan’s somber nod he understood.

Byers produced a set of car keys from his pocket and handed them over, his fingers deliberately lingering against Steve’s palm. “I have to work this afternoon,” he said gently. “But maybe tonight, I mean, if you’re not busy…” Jonathan caressed Steve’s wrist with his thumb and gave him a last meaningful look before heading down the steps to his mom’s car.

**************

The Harringtons arrived home less than an hour later, too consumed with bickering to pay their sons much mind. Predicting that this inattention would be short-lived, Steve seized on the one activity that always cleared his head: he went for a run.

Even the anticipation of a good sprint triggered a sort of catharsis for him: the cool nylon of his track shorts, the threadbare Springsteen T-shirt he reserved for just this purpose, the determination with which he laced up his Nikes.

Despite his dark mood, Harrington managed a smile as he popped a particular cassette into his Walkman – the mixtape that had miraculously appeared in his locker just last week. He recalled with fondness the sour sneer of disdain on Jonathan’s face when he learned that Steve was wearing out a favourite running tape with repeated listens of “Don’t Stop Believing.”

The new mixtape was entitled “Running Away from the Journey” – a testament to Jonathan’s dry sense of humour - and the lead-off track was Billy Idol’s “Dancing With Myself.” The rollicking opening riff blared from his headphones and Steve set out with no particular destination in mind. He would simply run until he didn’t have to anymore, and then he would turn back.

After twenty minutes at a steady dash, he was unsurprised to find himself standing at the end of the Byers’ driveway. Although he knew that Jonathan wasn’t home, it would feel good to cool his heels on friendly ground before heading home to confront whatever hostility awaited him there.

He stopped short as he approached the house. Will was sitting on the front step, elbows on his knees, his chin resting in his hands, a dejected expression on his face. He brightened a little when he noticed Steve, calling to him and explaining with some regret that Jonathan wasn’t home.

Harrington wiped the sweat from his brow with the front of his T-shirt. “I know. I was just out for a run. Are you alright?” he managed, still catching his breath.

“Oh, I’m waiting for my Dad,” Will replied with a wan smile.

Before Steve could respond, Joyce’s angry voice was heard through the screen door. “Lonnie, would it really hurt you to be on time for a change?” She stormed out onto the porch, clapping a hand to her mouth when she realized her mistake. “Oh shit, Steve, I’m sorry! I thought you were…someone else.”

“It’s fine. Really,” Harrington assured her, trying to decide how long to linger with mother and son in this awkward moment.

From within the house, the phone began to ring. Joyce scowled, guessing at the identity of the caller, and went inside. Soon the ringing ceased and one half of a heated argument commenced.

“He’s not coming,” the younger boy remarked, almost to himself. He stood up, gave the front step a single hard kick and moved to go indoors. On impulse, he turned to Steve, “Can you wait here? I’ll be right back.”

When he returned, Will was carrying a chilled glass of Tang and a bright red Frisbee. He handed the cold drink to Harrington with a shy grin, and mimed a flick of the disc. “I don’t have any plans. Do you?”

Will giggled as Steve downed the Tang like he was shotgunning a beer, and set the glass down on the porch with a soft thud. “Well,” Harrington announced, snatching the disc from the boy’s hand and jogging across the lawn. “I do plan to give you the run of your life! Go long, Byers!”

[the-crystal-muse]

Some Cadance and Reformed Chrysalis Thing

Because I’m in pony hell and this was too amusing not to do. Tagging @queenchrysalisofthechangelings​ and @queenfeeder​ cause why not?

“Celestia, Twilight, Luna; With all due respect, HOW COULD YOU BRING CHRYSALIS HERE?!” “We thought that you, as Princess of Love and the person that Chrysalis has hurt the most, may have the best chance of reforming her.” “Cool, great, awesome. Can I have a second opinion from someone who didn’t think sending Discord after Tirek was a good idea???”

“Oh don’t worry, Princess, you won’t even notice I’m here. And who knows, maybe we can be friends. We can braid each others’ manes, talk about cute stallions, steal love from your worthless subjects-” “Please just stop talking.”

Of course, this wasn’t done without protective measures. Protective wards, spells, and enchantments were set up across the empire in case she tries something tricky. “Aw, what’s the matter? Don’t trust me, princess?” “No.” “Hahahaha! Good, I wouldn’t either.”

Cadance or Shining coming home from a long day’s work to find that their spouse is talking to Chrysalis disguised as them. The two eventually come up with a complex series of code words to know who’s who. Most of them are demeaning to Chrysalis herself, just to be on the safe side.

“I’m surprised you gave me such a nice room, Cadance. It has a lovely view of the Crystal Heart.” “Yeah well, the room overlooking the isolated crystal caverns was taken.”

They may practically attack each other (verbally) in private, but in public they’re very friendly. Cadance wants to promote Changeling-Pony relations and Chrysalis doesn’t want a mob after her, and neither want the princesses to think the reforming isn’t working. They take to extremely petty and passive aggressive forms of kindness when around others.

“You know, I could actually help you find new ways to do your mane. After all, I can model looks before you try them and such, maybe help you decide on what you want to do with yourself...” “That’s...weirdly nice. What’s the catch?” “There is no catch. I’m just one-upping you.”

There it is. They’re constantly trying to one-up each other in terms of niceness. “Honey, it’s 4 A.M. What are you doing?” “Chrysalis baked me a cake! A cake! I’m getting her back!” “By sewing...footsie pajamas?” “She’s going to love them!” “Please go to bed, I worry for you both.”

Oddly enough, Shining makes less of a big deal about Chrysalis than Cadance does. He’s been a mediator between them more than once, and it’s never pretty. Cadance has a hard time not seeing it as betrayal, and Chrysalis sees it as a victory any time Shining takes her side.

Due to changelings having surprisingly long lifespans, and changeling queens have even longer ones, Chrysalis likes noting that Cadance will probably never be rid of her. Everything may disappear; her husband, her friends, her loved ones, but Chrysalis will remain. Cadance brushes her off. She snidely says, “All the more reason to make you my best friend, huh?” Chrysalis laughs and heartily agrees.

The two get into fierce debates on love and its properties, almost like clockwork. Actually, it is clockwork, because it happens when Cadance gives Chrysalis her regular meal of love around breakfast, lunch, and dinner. So the debates are often. Chrysalis sees it as a power source that is finite and can’t be spread around, or else you weaken yourself. Cadance sees love as infinite and that it grows stronger the more you share it. At first the arguments were rather heated, even dangerous to be around, but as time grew on the two began to concede that each had a point...Somewhat.

“I guess you have a good reason to see that. I mean, love is food for you.” “Yes. And it’s only natural that you’d see this magic that you can generate freely as unending. Maybe if our lives had been switched, our views would be different.” “Ah, I can see it already: Chrysalis, princess of love! Benevolent ruler of the Crystal Empire!” “Haha! Yes well, I don’t think it has the same ring to it as Queen Cadance, feared leader of the changeling army.” “Touche. Who knows, maybe you could give me tips on kidnapping ponies.” “And you could show me how to blow up armies with love.”

It takes a long time, but Chrysalis is eventually allowed to watch Flurry unsupervised. Heck, it took a while for Cadance to let her be around the filly at all. Surprisingly, Chrysalis wasn’t that bad to Flurry. “I’m a mother, Cadance,” she said in a dismissive tone. “I know how to treat hatchlings.” “Didn’t you force them to become members of your army?” “Details, details.”

Chrysalis’ parenting advice is both the worst and best ever. “Each hatchling is different. Individuality within the hive is permitted so long as it doesn’t impede a changeling’s ability to do their duty. Sometimes you have to watch a changeling to know how they’ll respond to a situation, that way you know how to teach them.” “What worked best for you?” “Well, intimidation is the easiest method. Few will disobey someone they fear, but respect has its place too. Sometimes compliments or praise will inspire a hatchling to try harder than fear ever could.” “Wow...You know, maybe you weren’t so bad after all.” “I loved praising them for draining ponies dry.” “Oh yeah, you were evil. I forgot.”

Remember how Chrysalis said she’d outlive Shining? She was right. As time went on, Cadance would continually lose friends and family. Chrysalis was one of the few constants in her life. At first she’d lash out at Chrysalis, attack her, scream at her. She was filled with rage and sorrow and emotions that definitely were not love, and the changeling queen was an easy target.

Chrysalis responded better than expected. She’d chastise Cadance for being so immature, remind her that she stopped being her enemy long ago. She offers to help comfort Cadance, and the princess eventually accepts. As it turns out, Chrysalis has had her own run-ins with grief before, and is happy to help Cadance through these tough times.

On a less dark note, Cadance once made the mistake of forgetting to send Chrysalis away before letting Thorax see her. It took a few moments for Thorax to be pinned against the wall, her horn against his throat chitin. It took several minutes of coaxing to make her let him go, and not before she gave her a murderous glare. “You’re lucky the princess is so kind,” she says as he drops to the floor. He couldn’t agree more.

Everyone has their bad days. More often than not it’s Cadance. But sometimes...Even the changeling queen can feel like something’s not right.

“Chrysalis? What are you doing here, it’s three in the mor-” “Why are you doing this?” “...What?” “Why are you doing this? You hate me.” “No I don’t!” “You did, that’s what matters. I did horrible things to you, princess. Terrible things. What could possibly make you want to reform me? You could have let me rot. Hell, you could have let Twilight Sparkle’s pupil teach me. But instead here I am...So why?” “Honestly...I didn’t want you here at first. You were kinda forced on me. But, really, after all the progress we’ve made? I’m kinda glad you’re here now.” “We? I’d say the work was rather one-sided, don’t you? I wasn’t exactly open to change.” “That’s not what I meant. You’re not the only one who’s grown for the better, Chrysalis.” “...Oh.” “Now please turn off the light. I’m trying to sleep.”

At this point, sleep schedules don’t exist in the castle. Between Chrysalis deciding that stable sleeping is for the weak-minded, Cadance dealing with her antic, and Shining putting up with it all, they all just settle for taking sporadic naps throughout the day. It’s somewhat coordinated.

Speaking of, nopony tell Shining Armor it was those two who drew the mustache on his face while he was asleep. It’s their favorite bonding activity.

[nishantwap]

The Supreme Court Just Made It A Lot Harder For You To Sue Your Employer

New Post has been published on https://www.hsnews.us/the-supreme-court-just-made-it-a-lot-harder-for-you-to-sue-your-employer/

The Supreme Court Just Made It A Lot Harder For You To Sue Your Employer

Employers who stiff their workers or discriminate against them just got a big lift from the Supreme Court, which issued a major ruling Monday making it easier for companies to avoid employee lawsuits.

The 5-4 ruling upheld employers’ use of class-action waivers in arbitration agreements. By signing these controversial provisions, workers give up their right to band together and sue in court for back pay or damages, and are instead forced to take their disputes to arbitrators individually.

Arbitration agreements have become a common way for employers to stifle lawsuits that could lead to large plaintiff classes and big payouts. Workers backed by employee groups and labor unions challenged their employers’ use of these agreements, claiming they ran afoul of the National Labor Relations Act, or NLRA, which guarantees workers the right to join forces in “mutual aid and protection.”

The employer-friendly conservative majority on the court decided against the workers. They ruled that collective bargaining law does not supersede federal law that established the arbitration process, therefore making the class-action waivers in employment contracts legitimate.

Justice Neil Gorsuch wrote the opinion for the conservative majority, saying Congress did not write the NLRA to “displace” federal arbitration law.

“The policy may be debatable but the law is clear: Congress has instructed that arbitration agreements like those before us must be enforced as written,” Gorsuch wrote. 

The high court has previously ruled that companies can force consumers into arbitration agreements with class-action waivers, which are tucked into the fine print when you buy a plane ticket or sign up for a cell phone. The latest ruling effectively sanctions the use of these waivers in the workplace, a practice that has grown increasingly common over the last two decades.

The Supreme Court ruling will have long-lasting implications for workers. Class-action lawsuits are often the most powerful way for employees to secure back pay when their minimum wage or overtime rights have been violated or to secure damages when their bosses run afoul of discrimination laws.

It’s harder to pursue these cases as a single worker than as part of a group, which is why employers prefer arbitration. Lawyers can be reluctant to file individual complaints in which the judgments or settlements will be small and not worth their time. Many workers are also hesitant to file their lawsuits as individuals, fearing their employers will ostracize or retaliate against them.

In a strong dissent, Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg called the decision of the majority “egregiously wrong.” She argued that the rights under the NLRA include the right to pursue litigation collectively, and that an employer-dictated waiver would violate it.

“Employees’ rights to band together to meet their employers’ superior strength would be worth precious little if employers could condition employment on workers signing away those rights,” Ginsburg wrote.

“There is strength in numbers,” Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg said during oral arguments of the case last year. “We have to protect the individual worker from being in a situation where he can’t protect his rights.”

During oral arguments last year, Justice Stephen Breyer said the case could undermine “the entire heart of the New Deal” by weakening collective action by workers.

According to a report last year from the Economic Policy Institute, an estimated 25 million workers ― just under one-quarter of non-union employees in the private sector ― give up their right to join class-action lawsuits as a condition of employment. The report anticipated that waivers would become an “even more widespread practice” in the event the Supreme Court sanctioned them.

Class-action lawsuits are often the most powerful way for employees to secure back pay when their minimum wage or overtime rights have been violated or to secure damages when their bosses run afoul of discrimination laws.

The Supreme Court case, National Labor Relations Board v. Murphy Oil USA, Inc., consolidated three separate cases involving different employers: the software company Epic Systems, the accounting and consulting firm Ernst & Young, and the oil company and gas station chain Murphy Oil.

A former Murphy Oil employee, Sheila Hobson, claimed that when she worked at one of the company’s retail stores, she and her colleagues were required to do off-the-clock work they weren’t compensated for. They got together to sue the company for back pay. But when they consulted a lawyer, they learned they couldn’t take Murphy Oil to court as a group because they had already agreed to arbitration when they accepted their jobs.

The National Labor Relations Board, the independent agency that enforces collective bargaining law, argued that the forced arbitration clause interfered with Hobson’s right to join together with other employees to improve their working conditions. The Obama White House agreed, filing a brief with the Supreme Court in support of Hobson.

But that was under former President Barack Obama. After President Donald Trump was inaugurated, his administration took the extremely rare step of reversing a previous administration’s position on a sitting case before the court. Last June, Trump’s acting solicitor general filed a new brief in support of the employers in the case.

This article originally appeared on HuffPost.

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[daddyslittlejuliet]

Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It?

Theories abound about what in dog urine is toxic to plants, a popular one being extremes of pH. People say that acidic urine burns the plants, but the real answer to “Why does dog pee kill plants?” is a lot simpler.

Puppies and senior dogs urinate twice as often as adult dogs. (Photo via Wikimedia Commons)

A 1981 study called Lawn burn from dog urine helped bury the old myth that pH is causing the trouble. The concentration of urea in dog urine is basically too much of a good thing for grass and other plants. Other salt and compounds such as potassium may also contribute, but nitrates are known to be the No. 1 killer.

The main thing that makes dog urine more damaging is volume. Large dogs deposit more urine. Females tend to deposit it all in one location. Male dogs are easier on the grass but hard on trees, where urine sprayed on the trunk can filter down to the roots and in large enough volumes can kill the entire plant.

Just how much dogs contribute to the poor health of some city trees is under debate. But we’ve all seen the grates, bags and other contraptions to try and keep the trees pee-free.

What can you do about dog pee killing plants?

You can use training to modify behavior, getting your dog to pee in certain areas and to use the gutters rather than the grass. But most dog owners draw the line at being quite that prescriptive. So there are a number of other tips to reduce the conflict between pup and gardens.

Designate dog pee areas

Focusing all the dog pee in one spot can help with the problem … if you give up putting any plants in that area. A stake in an out of the way area may attract males to use the area. Likewise, when you are out and about, if your dog will use mulched or graveled areas, this will reduce stress on plants.

Of course, a dog’s gotta go when a dog’s gotta go. But when you have the option, steer Fido to a lamppost rather than a tree and a bark covered area rather than a stressed-looking lawn.

You can spot stressed trees by bark that is discolored or even peeling off around the base. And trees that are under six inches in diameter or have thin bark are at higher risk.

Dilute the dog pee by watering

If you can, watering the peed-on area immediately can help dilute the urine and minimize plant damage. For similar reasons it is a good idea to ensure your dog always has ample access to water. More diluted urine will do less damage. And besides, who wants to have a dehydrated doggie?

Urine burn applications

Various potions are on sale to break down the ammonia even more effectively than water. So if you have an especially cranky neighbor and your dog just really has to go on his property, you might consider carrying a squirt bottle of pee-weakener on your walks to minimize the damage. If your local stores don’t have it, you can order it online in tablet form and make the solution up as needed.

I am not sure how well they work, but at least they show you are making an effort. And when it comes to your more ardently gardening neighbors, I think dogged kindness and consideration is a better approach than engaging in a pitched argument.

Use robust grasses

If you are establishing or replacing a lawn, look into more robust grass species. Most lawns use something like Kentucky bluegrass, which has shallow roots and is easy to transport and establish. But it is also one of the more sensitive varieties and easily damaged by urine. Bermuda or ryegrasses may be more difficult to establish but they are hardier once they settle in.

Dietary supplements

I personally am not in favor of putting anything inside a dog that doesn’t need to be there. But I suppose it is possible that supplements that bind nitrogen are completely safe for dogs. I draw the line just short of this particular solution, but others may wish to look into it.

I would recommend making sure that you know exactly how the additive works and taking veterinary advice about its use with your dog. And I would immediately disregard any products aimed at changing the pH of the dogs urine because, as we have already established, this is not the cause of the problem.

The community balance of dog versus plants tends to become particularly fraught in built-up city areas. I remember once being reprimanded at length by an elderly neighbor just because my dog was peeing in the grass around my apartment building. It is the only building for miles that allows large dogs and as a result contains quite a few of them. The grass, I concede, is less than thriving.

I decided to simply not reply (despite her real fur coat giving me some tempting material for a rebuttal) and a few days later the same woman actually walked up to me and apologized. She just wanted the environment to look nice and knew that I wasn’t doing anything thing deliberately to damage it.

Whether you are more of a dog person or more of a plant person, or a bit of both, it is always a good idea to try and reduce conflict where we can and make the community a great place for both puppies and plants.

Read related stories on Dogster:

I Got Rid of Grass Burn from Dog Pee by Using Dog Rocks

11 Tips for Keeping a Dog-Friendly Garden

Four Ways to Stop Your Puppy from Digging

Poisonous Plants and Foods for Dogs

Dogs and Predators: How to Protect Your Dog from Coyotes and Birds of Prey

About the author: Emily Kane is a New Zealand-born animal behaviorist of the throw-back radical behaviorist type, albeit with a holistic-yuppie-feminist-slacker twist. She spent many years as an animal behavior researcher and is now more of an indoor paper-pushing researcher. Her early dog-related education came from Jess the Afghan Hound and Border Collies Bandit and Tam. It is now being continued by her own dogs and extended dog family and some cats (and her three aquatic snails Gala, Granny, and Pippin — they think of themselves as dog-esque).

The post Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It? appeared first on Dogster.

[jeffreyrwelch]

Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It?

Theories abound about what in dog urine is toxic to plants, a popular one being extremes of pH. People say that acidic urine burns the plants, but the real answer to “Why does dog pee kill plants?” is a lot simpler.

Puppies and senior dogs urinate twice as often as adult dogs. (Photo via Wikimedia Commons)

A 1981 study called Lawn burn from dog urine helped bury the old myth that pH is causing the trouble. The concentration of urea in dog urine is basically too much of a good thing for grass and other plants. Other salt and compounds such as potassium may also contribute, but nitrates are known to be the No. 1 killer.

The main thing that makes dog urine more damaging is volume. Large dogs deposit more urine. Females tend to deposit it all in one location. Male dogs are easier on the grass but hard on trees, where urine sprayed on the trunk can filter down to the roots and in large enough volumes can kill the entire plant.

Just how much dogs contribute to the poor health of some city trees is under debate. But we’ve all seen the grates, bags and other contraptions to try and keep the trees pee-free.

What can you do about dog pee killing plants?

You can use training to modify behavior, getting your dog to pee in certain areas and to use the gutters rather than the grass. But most dog owners draw the line at being quite that prescriptive. So there are a number of other tips to reduce the conflict between pup and gardens.

Designate dog pee areas

Focusing all the dog pee in one spot can help with the problem … if you give up putting any plants in that area. A stake in an out of the way area may attract males to use the area. Likewise, when you are out and about, if your dog will use mulched or graveled areas, this will reduce stress on plants.

Of course, a dog’s gotta go when a dog’s gotta go. But when you have the option, steer Fido to a lamppost rather than a tree and a bark covered area rather than a stressed-looking lawn.

You can spot stressed trees by bark that is discolored or even peeling off around the base. And trees that are under six inches in diameter or have thin bark are at higher risk.

Dilute the dog pee by watering

If you can, watering the peed-on area immediately can help dilute the urine and minimize plant damage. For similar reasons it is a good idea to ensure your dog always has ample access to water. More diluted urine will do less damage. And besides, who wants to have a dehydrated doggie?

Urine burn applications

Various potions are on sale to break down the ammonia even more effectively than water. So if you have an especially cranky neighbor and your dog just really has to go on his property, you might consider carrying a squirt bottle of pee-weakener on your walks to minimize the damage. If your local stores don’t have it, you can order it online in tablet form and make the solution up as needed.

I am not sure how well they work, but at least they show you are making an effort. And when it comes to your more ardently gardening neighbors, I think dogged kindness and consideration is a better approach than engaging in a pitched argument.

Use robust grasses

If you are establishing or replacing a lawn, look into more robust grass species. Most lawns use something like Kentucky bluegrass, which has shallow roots and is easy to transport and establish. But it is also one of the more sensitive varieties and easily damaged by urine. Bermuda or ryegrasses may be more difficult to establish but they are hardier once they settle in.

Dietary supplements

I personally am not in favor of putting anything inside a dog that doesn’t need to be there. But I suppose it is possible that supplements that bind nitrogen are completely safe for dogs. I draw the line just short of this particular solution, but others may wish to look into it.

I would recommend making sure that you know exactly how the additive works and taking veterinary advice about its use with your dog. And I would immediately disregard any products aimed at changing the pH of the dogs urine because, as we have already established, this is not the cause of the problem.

The community balance of dog versus plants tends to become particularly fraught in built-up city areas. I remember once being reprimanded at length by an elderly neighbor just because my dog was peeing in the grass around my apartment building. It is the only building for miles that allows large dogs and as a result contains quite a few of them. The grass, I concede, is less than thriving.

I decided to simply not reply (despite her real fur coat giving me some tempting material for a rebuttal) and a few days later the same woman actually walked up to me and apologized. She just wanted the environment to look nice and knew that I wasn’t doing anything thing deliberately to damage it.

Whether you are more of a dog person or more of a plant person, or a bit of both, it is always a good idea to try and reduce conflict where we can and make the community a great place for both puppies and plants.

Read related stories on Dogster:

I Got Rid of Grass Burn from Dog Pee by Using Dog Rocks

11 Tips for Keeping a Dog-Friendly Garden

Four Ways to Stop Your Puppy from Digging

Poisonous Plants and Foods for Dogs

Dogs and Predators: How to Protect Your Dog from Coyotes and Birds of Prey

About the author: Emily Kane is a New Zealand-born animal behaviorist of the throw-back radical behaviorist type, albeit with a holistic-yuppie-feminist-slacker twist. She spent many years as an animal behavior researcher and is now more of an indoor paper-pushing researcher. Her early dog-related education came from Jess the Afghan Hound and Border Collies Bandit and Tam. It is now being continued by her own dogs and extended dog family and some cats (and her three aquatic snails Gala, Granny, and Pippin — they think of themselves as dog-esque).

The post Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It? appeared first on Dogster.

[buynewsoul]

Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It?

Theories abound about what in dog urine is toxic to plants, a popular one being extremes of pH. People say that acidic urine burns the plants, but the real answer to “Why does dog pee kill plants?” is a lot simpler.

Puppies and senior dogs urinate twice as often as adult dogs. (Photo via Wikimedia Commons)

A 1981 study called Lawn burn from dog urine helped bury the old myth that pH is causing the trouble. The concentration of urea in dog urine is basically too much of a good thing for grass and other plants. Other salt and compounds such as potassium may also contribute, but nitrates are known to be the No. 1 killer.

The main thing that makes dog urine more damaging is volume. Large dogs deposit more urine. Females tend to deposit it all in one location. Male dogs are easier on the grass but hard on trees, where urine sprayed on the trunk can filter down to the roots and in large enough volumes can kill the entire plant.

Just how much dogs contribute to the poor health of some city trees is under debate. But we’ve all seen the grates, bags and other contraptions to try and keep the trees pee-free.

What can you do about dog pee killing plants?

You can use training to modify behavior, getting your dog to pee in certain areas and to use the gutters rather than the grass. But most dog owners draw the line at being quite that prescriptive. So there are a number of other tips to reduce the conflict between pup and gardens.

Designate dog pee areas

Focusing all the dog pee in one spot can help with the problem … if you give up putting any plants in that area. A stake in an out of the way area may attract males to use the area. Likewise, when you are out and about, if your dog will use mulched or graveled areas, this will reduce stress on plants.

Of course, a dog’s gotta go when a dog’s gotta go. But when you have the option, steer Fido to a lamppost rather than a tree and a bark covered area rather than a stressed-looking lawn.

You can spot stressed trees by bark that is discolored or even peeling off around the base. And trees that are under six inches in diameter or have thin bark are at higher risk.

Dilute the dog pee by watering

If you can, watering the peed-on area immediately can help dilute the urine and minimize plant damage. For similar reasons it is a good idea to ensure your dog always has ample access to water. More diluted urine will do less damage. And besides, who wants to have a dehydrated doggie?

Urine burn applications

Various potions are on sale to break down the ammonia even more effectively than water. So if you have an especially cranky neighbor and your dog just really has to go on his property, you might consider carrying a squirt bottle of pee-weakener on your walks to minimize the damage. If your local stores don’t have it, you can order it online in tablet form and make the solution up as needed.

I am not sure how well they work, but at least they show you are making an effort. And when it comes to your more ardently gardening neighbors, I think dogged kindness and consideration is a better approach than engaging in a pitched argument.

Use robust grasses

If you are establishing or replacing a lawn, look into more robust grass species. Most lawns use something like Kentucky bluegrass, which has shallow roots and is easy to transport and establish. But it is also one of the more sensitive varieties and easily damaged by urine. Bermuda or ryegrasses may be more difficult to establish but they are hardier once they settle in.

Dietary supplements

I personally am not in favor of putting anything inside a dog that doesn’t need to be there. But I suppose it is possible that supplements that bind nitrogen are completely safe for dogs. I draw the line just short of this particular solution, but others may wish to look into it.

I would recommend making sure that you know exactly how the additive works and taking veterinary advice about its use with your dog. And I would immediately disregard any products aimed at changing the pH of the dogs urine because, as we have already established, this is not the cause of the problem.

The community balance of dog versus plants tends to become particularly fraught in built-up city areas. I remember once being reprimanded at length by an elderly neighbor just because my dog was peeing in the grass around my apartment building. It is the only building for miles that allows large dogs and as a result contains quite a few of them. The grass, I concede, is less than thriving.

I decided to simply not reply (despite her real fur coat giving me some tempting material for a rebuttal) and a few days later the same woman actually walked up to me and apologized. She just wanted the environment to look nice and knew that I wasn’t doing anything thing deliberately to damage it.

Whether you are more of a dog person or more of a plant person, or a bit of both, it is always a good idea to try and reduce conflict where we can and make the community a great place for both puppies and plants.

Read related stories on Dogster:

I Got Rid of Grass Burn from Dog Pee by Using Dog Rocks

11 Tips for Keeping a Dog-Friendly Garden

Four Ways to Stop Your Puppy from Digging

Poisonous Plants and Foods for Dogs

Dogs and Predators: How to Protect Your Dog from Coyotes and Birds of Prey

About the author: Emily Kane is a New Zealand-born animal behaviorist of the throw-back radical behaviorist type, albeit with a holistic-yuppie-feminist-slacker twist. She spent many years as an animal behavior researcher and is now more of an indoor paper-pushing researcher. Her early dog-related education came from Jess the Afghan Hound and Border Collies Bandit and Tam. It is now being continued by her own dogs and extended dog family and some cats (and her three aquatic snails Gala, Granny, and Pippin — they think of themselves as dog-esque).

The post Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It? appeared first on Dogster.

[stiles-wtf]

Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It?

Theories abound about what in dog urine is toxic to plants, a popular one being extremes of pH. People say that acidic urine burns the plants, but the real answer to “Why does dog pee kill plants?” is a lot simpler.

Puppies and senior dogs urinate twice as often as adult dogs. (Photo via Wikimedia Commons)

A 1981 study called Lawn burn from dog urine helped bury the old myth that pH is causing the trouble. The concentration of urea in dog urine is basically too much of a good thing for grass and other plants. Other salt and compounds such as potassium may also contribute, but nitrates are known to be the No. 1 killer.

The main thing that makes dog urine more damaging is volume. Large dogs deposit more urine. Females tend to deposit it all in one location. Male dogs are easier on the grass but hard on trees, where urine sprayed on the trunk can filter down to the roots and in large enough volumes can kill the entire plant.

Just how much dogs contribute to the poor health of some city trees is under debate. But we’ve all seen the grates, bags and other contraptions to try and keep the trees pee-free.

What can you do about dog pee killing plants?

You can use training to modify behavior, getting your dog to pee in certain areas and to use the gutters rather than the grass. But most dog owners draw the line at being quite that prescriptive. So there are a number of other tips to reduce the conflict between pup and gardens.

Designate dog pee areas

Focusing all the dog pee in one spot can help with the problem … if you give up putting any plants in that area. A stake in an out of the way area may attract males to use the area. Likewise, when you are out and about, if your dog will use mulched or graveled areas, this will reduce stress on plants.

Of course, a dog’s gotta go when a dog’s gotta go. But when you have the option, steer Fido to a lamppost rather than a tree and a bark covered area rather than a stressed-looking lawn.

You can spot stressed trees by bark that is discolored or even peeling off around the base. And trees that are under six inches in diameter or have thin bark are at higher risk.

Dilute the dog pee by watering

If you can, watering the peed-on area immediately can help dilute the urine and minimize plant damage. For similar reasons it is a good idea to ensure your dog always has ample access to water. More diluted urine will do less damage. And besides, who wants to have a dehydrated doggie?

Urine burn applications

Various potions are on sale to break down the ammonia even more effectively than water. So if you have an especially cranky neighbor and your dog just really has to go on his property, you might consider carrying a squirt bottle of pee-weakener on your walks to minimize the damage. If your local stores don’t have it, you can order it online in tablet form and make the solution up as needed.

I am not sure how well they work, but at least they show you are making an effort. And when it comes to your more ardently gardening neighbors, I think dogged kindness and consideration is a better approach than engaging in a pitched argument.

Use robust grasses

If you are establishing or replacing a lawn, look into more robust grass species. Most lawns use something like Kentucky bluegrass, which has shallow roots and is easy to transport and establish. But it is also one of the more sensitive varieties and easily damaged by urine. Bermuda or ryegrasses may be more difficult to establish but they are hardier once they settle in.

Dietary supplements

I personally am not in favor of putting anything inside a dog that doesn’t need to be there. But I suppose it is possible that supplements that bind nitrogen are completely safe for dogs. I draw the line just short of this particular solution, but others may wish to look into it.

I would recommend making sure that you know exactly how the additive works and taking veterinary advice about its use with your dog. And I would immediately disregard any products aimed at changing the pH of the dogs urine because, as we have already established, this is not the cause of the problem.

The community balance of dog versus plants tends to become particularly fraught in built-up city areas. I remember once being reprimanded at length by an elderly neighbor just because my dog was peeing in the grass around my apartment building. It is the only building for miles that allows large dogs and as a result contains quite a few of them. The grass, I concede, is less than thriving.

I decided to simply not reply (despite her real fur coat giving me some tempting material for a rebuttal) and a few days later the same woman actually walked up to me and apologized. She just wanted the environment to look nice and knew that I wasn’t doing anything thing deliberately to damage it.

Whether you are more of a dog person or more of a plant person, or a bit of both, it is always a good idea to try and reduce conflict where we can and make the community a great place for both puppies and plants.

Read related stories on Dogster:

I Got Rid of Grass Burn from Dog Pee by Using Dog Rocks

11 Tips for Keeping a Dog-Friendly Garden

Four Ways to Stop Your Puppy from Digging

Poisonous Plants and Foods for Dogs

Dogs and Predators: How to Protect Your Dog from Coyotes and Birds of Prey

About the author: Emily Kane is a New Zealand-born animal behaviorist of the throw-back radical behaviorist type, albeit with a holistic-yuppie-feminist-slacker twist. She spent many years as an animal behavior researcher and is now more of an indoor paper-pushing researcher. Her early dog-related education came from Jess the Afghan Hound and Border Collies Bandit and Tam. It is now being continued by her own dogs and extended dog family and some cats (and her three aquatic snails Gala, Granny, and Pippin — they think of themselves as dog-esque).

The post Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It? appeared first on Dogster.

[grublypetcare]

Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It?

Theories abound about what in dog urine is toxic to plants, a popular one being extremes of pH. People say that acidic urine burns the plants, but the real answer to “Why does dog pee kill plants?” is a lot simpler.

Puppies and senior dogs urinate twice as often as adult dogs. (Photo via Wikimedia Commons)

A 1981 study called Lawn burn from dog urine helped bury the old myth that pH is causing the trouble. The concentration of urea in dog urine is basically too much of a good thing for grass and other plants. Other salt and compounds such as potassium may also contribute, but nitrates are known to be the No. 1 killer.

The main thing that makes dog urine more damaging is volume. Large dogs deposit more urine. Females tend to deposit it all in one location. Male dogs are easier on the grass but hard on trees, where urine sprayed on the trunk can filter down to the roots and in large enough volumes can kill the entire plant.

Just how much dogs contribute to the poor health of some city trees is under debate. But we’ve all seen the grates, bags and other contraptions to try and keep the trees pee-free.

What can you do about dog pee killing plants?

You can use training to modify behavior, getting your dog to pee in certain areas and to use the gutters rather than the grass. But most dog owners draw the line at being quite that prescriptive. So there are a number of other tips to reduce the conflict between pup and gardens.

Designate dog pee areas

Focusing all the dog pee in one spot can help with the problem … if you give up putting any plants in that area. A stake in an out of the way area may attract males to use the area. Likewise, when you are out and about, if your dog will use mulched or graveled areas, this will reduce stress on plants.

Of course, a dog’s gotta go when a dog’s gotta go. But when you have the option, steer Fido to a lamppost rather than a tree and a bark covered area rather than a stressed-looking lawn.

You can spot stressed trees by bark that is discolored or even peeling off around the base. And trees that are under six inches in diameter or have thin bark are at higher risk.

Dilute the dog pee by watering

If you can, watering the peed-on area immediately can help dilute the urine and minimize plant damage. For similar reasons it is a good idea to ensure your dog always has ample access to water. More diluted urine will do less damage. And besides, who wants to have a dehydrated doggie?

Urine burn applications

Various potions are on sale to break down the ammonia even more effectively than water. So if you have an especially cranky neighbor and your dog just really has to go on his property, you might consider carrying a squirt bottle of pee-weakener on your walks to minimize the damage. If your local stores don’t have it, you can order it online in tablet form and make the solution up as needed.

I am not sure how well they work, but at least they show you are making an effort. And when it comes to your more ardently gardening neighbors, I think dogged kindness and consideration is a better approach than engaging in a pitched argument.

Use robust grasses

If you are establishing or replacing a lawn, look into more robust grass species. Most lawns use something like Kentucky bluegrass, which has shallow roots and is easy to transport and establish. But it is also one of the more sensitive varieties and easily damaged by urine. Bermuda or ryegrasses may be more difficult to establish but they are hardier once they settle in.

Dietary supplements

I personally am not in favor of putting anything inside a dog that doesn’t need to be there. But I suppose it is possible that supplements that bind nitrogen are completely safe for dogs. I draw the line just short of this particular solution, but others may wish to look into it.

I would recommend making sure that you know exactly how the additive works and taking veterinary advice about its use with your dog. And I would immediately disregard any products aimed at changing the pH of the dogs urine because, as we have already established, this is not the cause of the problem.

The community balance of dog versus plants tends to become particularly fraught in built-up city areas. I remember once being reprimanded at length by an elderly neighbor just because my dog was peeing in the grass around my apartment building. It is the only building for miles that allows large dogs and as a result contains quite a few of them. The grass, I concede, is less than thriving.

I decided to simply not reply (despite her real fur coat giving me some tempting material for a rebuttal) and a few days later the same woman actually walked up to me and apologized. She just wanted the environment to look nice and knew that I wasn’t doing anything thing deliberately to damage it.

Whether you are more of a dog person or more of a plant person, or a bit of both, it is always a good idea to try and reduce conflict where we can and make the community a great place for both puppies and plants.

Read related stories on Dogster:

I Got Rid of Grass Burn from Dog Pee by Using Dog Rocks

11 Tips for Keeping a Dog-Friendly Garden

Four Ways to Stop Your Puppy from Digging

Poisonous Plants and Foods for Dogs

Dogs and Predators: How to Protect Your Dog from Coyotes and Birds of Prey

About the author: Emily Kane is a New Zealand-born animal behaviorist of the throw-back radical behaviorist type, albeit with a holistic-yuppie-feminist-slacker twist. She spent many years as an animal behavior researcher and is now more of an indoor paper-pushing researcher. Her early dog-related education came from Jess the Afghan Hound and Border Collies Bandit and Tam. It is now being continued by her own dogs and extended dog family and some cats (and her three aquatic snails Gala, Granny, and Pippin — they think of themselves as dog-esque).

The post Why Does Dog Pee Kill Plants? And What Can We Do About It? appeared first on Dogster.