#BTW if youre wondering. the original name said is ‘lena’

[b1adie]

ok so its like this but its actually like

jing yuan: JINGLIU?! i killed you with my lightning lord.

jingliu: i escaped 😀

[jedifighterpilot2727]

The Rook Chapter 3

Alright, y'all, here it is! The grand finale!! (Though there may be an epilogue!)

I hope you enjoy!! (btw, comments and asks are my absolute life!)

The song for this is 'i hate u, i love u' by gnash ft. Olivia O'brien 

Oh, by the way, I sobbed writing this, so tissues are recommended.

        I Hate You (But I Love You)

She wakes on her office couch, the now empty bottle of Scotch beside her reminding her that her pounding head is her own fault. She refuses to open her eyes, even though the curtains are drawn and the room should be mostly dark.

She just wants to not think, about Kara, about Supergirl, about how stupid she was for not realizing that the woman she was in love with was hiding  a whole identity from her.

So, she lays there, pondering how long she can put off getting up before someone interrupts her relative peace.

Turns out the answer is about five minutes before the door to her office swings open.

“Come on, up and at ‘em. Early bird gets the worm, yada yada yada.”

“Ugh, Jess, no.” Even behind her closed eyelids, she can tell when Jess flips the light on and she groans, throwing her arm over her eyes.

“Nope, none of that! Come on, busy day ahead.”

Lena groans again but complies, shifting into a sitting position and blinking until her eyes adjust enough that she can see the aspirin and bottle of gatorade that Jess is holding out for her. She takes them gratefully, swallowing the pills and following them with a long, slow sip of the neon colored drink.

“Gotta say, boss, the drunk on a work night look does not work on you.”

“Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Good, cause we have a lot to do today.” She thrusts a small bag in Lena’s direction. “Here are some toiletries, there’s a dress that just came from back from dry cleaning in your closet, oh and be sure to wear some sunglasses to cover those bags under your eyes - I called the press so there’s going to be photographers.”

Lena looks up, pressing the cool bottle of gatorade to her forehead.

“Photographers? For what?”

“Oh, right, sorry, the plane for Metropolis leaves in . . . “ Jess checks her watch. “Two hours.”

“Metropolis? I’m not going to Metropolis!”

“Yes, you are, in two hours; so chop chop.”

“Jess, what are you doing?”

Much to her surprise, her assistant kneels down so she's at eye level.

“Look, Lena, you pay me a lot of money to know . . . well, everything. And we may not exactly be friends, but I care about you, and for the past few weeks you’ve been really . . . not yourself. And I’m not going to mention any names, but we both know why. You need some space, and you’re going to get it. For a month. In Metropolis.”

“A month?!”

“And, speaking of she who shall not be named, there’s quite a list of things that you’ve been meaning to do in Metropolis that you’ve been putting off because you didn’t want to leave her. Now is the perfect time to tie up all those loose ends. Plus, my mom has been begging me to come visit, so it works out great. Three birds, one stone.”

“You’re coming with me?”

“Of course, dummy, who else is going to keep you straight!” Jess frowns. “Well, not straight, cause you like the ladies, but you know what I mean. Now come on, we gotta go.”

Jess turns for the door, and Lena watches her, stunned for a moment before calling out.

“Hey, Jess?” she waits for Jess to look back at her before continuing. “Thanks.”

“No problem, boss. Oh, and you might wanna put your hair in a bun today, it looks kinda -“ She trails off, her hands making some sort of jazz hands gesture around her head that makes Lena laugh.

“Yeah, of course. Oh and Jess? Can you make sure the plane has some hashbrowns for the ride? Preferably smothered in gravy."

* - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Long story short, Jess is a genius.

For starters, the photos of Lena leaving her office and getting into the SUV for the airport are stunning. She looks hot, by any standard, regardless of the fact that the sunglasses covering her face are hiding blood shot eyes and there’s a gatorade and saltine crackers tucked into her purse. All that matters is that her wine colored dress has a plunging neckline and her matching lipstick is one of Kara’s favorite shades.

It doesn’t matter that she almost breaks down on the short ride to the airport, because the Page Six spread makes her look like she’s fine.

It’s a sort of evil satisfaction, knowing that Kara will see the photos and wonder why she’s so put together.

She only wishes she really was that put together, and that her heart didn’t feel like it was shattering into a million pieces as she watches National City fade from view out the plane window.

* - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Metropolis is . . . refreshing.

She doesn’t see Kara in her mind’s eye every time she walks down the street or steps into a restaurant. Everywhere isn’t tainted with the memory of the best friend she thought she knew like National City is. After a few days, she can actually breathe, she can actually exist for longer than an hour without thinking of Kara’s smile.

She works pretty much from the time her eyes open until the time she falls asleep; but the exhaustion is welcome. Jess was right, she did have a lot of things to take care of in Metropolis, which is why she’s surprised when Jess leaves a break in her schedule on a Tuesday afternoon.

“Jess?” She calls over the intercom. “What am I doing from 3-4?”

“Oh, sorry, I forgot to pencil it in. You have an appointment with Dr. Fowler.”

Lena frowns.

“A doctor’s appointment? It’s not time for my yearly.”

“Dr. Fowler is a psychiatrist.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Yeah, I scheduled you an appointment with her, thought it might help with your . . .  girl problems.”

“Jess, I don’t need a psychiatrist.”

“Ok, boss, noted. but it’s already booked and paid for, so you might as well go this first time.”

Unfortunately, Lena can’t find the logic to argue with her.

* - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

She sits on the comfortable chair in Dr. Fowler’s office, staring down the woman across from her.

She seems, nice, for a psychiatrist.

Her shoulder length brown hair is tucked behind her ears, and her gray suit is non-threatening. She has a kind face, Lena thinks, unable to think of anything negative. Still, she refuses to cave, and fixes her eyes on the clock above Dr. Fowler’s head.

“My assistant made me this appointment.” She says for explanation. “I don’t really need therapy, so I’m sorry to waste your time.”

“I don’t mind.” Dr, Fowler smiles. “We can always just talk. No therapy needed. Are you from Metropolis?”

Lena debates answering her, but common manners win out.

“Well, mother was from Ireland, originally, but that’s . . . “

“A story for a therapist.” Dr. Fowler guesses, and Lena nods.

“That’s fine, we don’t have to talk about it. What brings you to Metropolis? Business? Pleasure?”

“Business.” Lena answers immediately, but guilt creeps up her spine, and she adjusts her answer. “Well, sort of. I live in National City, but . . . well, my assistant thought I could use a break from some people there so she scheduled me some time away. L-Corp has offices in both cities, so it’s convenient.”

“Ah, L-Corp. I remember when you opened up a branch in National City. I thought you were just supposed to stay there for a few months to make sure that everything was going smoothly, what made you change your mind?”

Lena hesitates, unwilling to share more than she has to, but still, she is paying for this; she might as well see what crazy advice this sham has to offer.

“I met someone.” She explains. “A friend.”

“A friend?”

“Well, sort of.”

“Sort of? Do I sense gay drama?” Dr. Fowler’s eyes sparkle, and Lena’s gaze catches on a picture of Dr. Fowler with her arm around another woman, a yellow lab sitting in front of them.

Of course Jess would do her research.

“She’s like . . . sunshine personified.” Lena offers as explanation. “Or at least, she was. Now, I don’t know what she is.”

Dr. Fowler shifts in her chair.

“What’s changed?”

“She . . .” Lena hesitates, reluctant to rehash her heart break. “She lied; about who she is. It turns out that she has this whole other persona that she just . . . hid from me. And you know what the worst part is?” She laughs mirthlessly. “I was friends with the other persona! and she just lied to me! Over and over again! Like I’m some kind of fool! Because I’m the idiot who can’t figure out that Kara Danvers is Supergirl!”

Her eyes flash to Dr. Fowler at her accidental revelation, but the other woman just smiles.

“Everything you say here is confidential. The secret is safe with me.”

Lena nods softly, but it seems that once the dam is broken the flow of her words can’t be stopped.

“She lied to me. For three years! I had to learn the truth from my dying brother! And then when she finally got the guts to tell me, do you know what she said?”

Dr. Fowler shakes her head.

“She said she loved me. That she wanted us to be together. Do you know how long I’ve waited to hear that?!”

“For three years?” Dr. Fowler offers, and Lena chokes back a sob.

“I’ve been in love with her for so long! And she was just oblivious. I guess like I was oblivious about her being Supergirl. But then she just tells me that she loves me. In the same conversation that she tells me the truth.”

“I’m sure that must have been devastating.” Dr. Fowler comments quietly, and Lena sets her jaw.

“I don’t know how I feel about her anymore. I don’t know if I can trust her.”

“That’s fair, you deserve to feel that way.”

Something in Lena settles at that. Up until now, she’s been berating herself for her anger. Like she was wrong for thinking bad of the great Supergirl. But now, she feels validated.

“I bought a whole company for her, you know. . . “

* - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - The rest of her session with Dr. Fowler is cathartic, if only because she can finally air out feelings without fear of judgment, with someone who gives her constructive feedback.

On her way out, she checks in with the receptionist.

“Jess scheduled you for two sessions a week, your next appointment is Thursday at 2. Is that okay?”'

Lena can’t help but roll her eyes. She definitely owes Jess another raise.

“Sounds perfect.”

* - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It’s surprisingly hard for her to fall into her post Kara routine. More often than not, she finds herself looking for her best friend in her downtime.

Kara’s presence has become a staple in her life, and she can’t help but mourn the loss.

Even though she knows whatever dream she had of them is lost.

It’s infuriating.

The one time she gets attached to someone,  it backfires.

Dr. Fowler says that she has ‘abandonment issues’, but she doesn’t feel abandoned, just. . . lost.

Kara Danvers was her reason for existing for so long. The drive behind every decision she made.

She just wanted Kara to be happy, but it turns out that Kara is a completely different person than she thought.

Dr. Fowler challenges her, asks her how she feels about Supergirl, separate from Kara.

And honestly, she doesn’t know.

At first she felt like she had to like Supergirl, if only to combat her brother’s dangerous rhetoric with Superman.

But then . . . Supergirl was nice, and good, and she saved Lena’s life on numerous occasions.

Not to mention she was the most beautiful woman Lena had ever seen, minus Kara, of course.

Kara with her glasses and dorky blunders.

Though she supposes, now that she thinks about it, that those blunders come from less of a place of awkwardness and more from the place of an alien being unsure of earth customs. She finds it endearing, in a way that makes her uncomfortable, and Dr. Fowler smiles softly before letting the subject drop.

The good thing about being in Metropolis is that she doesn’t hear a single news story about Supergirl.

Superman, maybe, but Supergirl is noticeably absent.

It’s refreshing.

So it shocks her even more when she gets a surprise visitor.

“Ms. Luthor, I’m sorry, I tried to stop her, but she’s got a badge, and a gun, and I wasn’t sure if -“

Lena’s eyes settle on none other than Alex Danvers.

“It’s fine, Jess, don’t worry about it. “

Jess looks between them for a long moment before she heads back to her desk.

“Alex.” Lena says once Jess is through the door.

“Lena. Kara told me you know her secret.”

“Ahh, are you here to mock me?”

“Mock you?” Alex brow crinkles in a way that’s so much like Kara it almost hurts. “I’m not here to mock you, I’m here to see if you needed a friend. I know I’m not as close as you and Kara, but I thought I’d at least offer my support.”

“Support?”

Alex sighs heavily.

“Look, ever since I was 14, protecting Kara’s secret identity has been my main goal. My parents entrusted me with it, and . . .  I never really got over it.”

“She never lied to you about her secret identity though.” Lena scoffs.

“No.” Alex concedes. “But I lied to her about mine.”

Lena’s head snaps up, eyeing Alex like she’s the last oracle.

"For four years, I lied to her about my job. I told her I was involved in biomedical engineering, that I was a sales rep for some company when really I worked for the DEO.”

“The Department of Extranormal Operations.” Lena clarifies.

“Exactly, and I didn’t even tell her what I was doing, because I wanted to protect her.”

“That’s still not -“

“I shot her down,” Alex continues. “I shot her down with Kryptonite arrows. Because I didn’t trust anyone else to make the shot. I shot my own sister with the one thing that hurts her, when she thought I was a sales rep.”

“What’s your point, Alex?”

“My point is that sometimes we lie to the people we love because we think it will protect them, even if it ends up hurting them in the end.”

“So you side with her then.” Lena concludes.

“No, I don’t, I . . . look, as Supergirl’s protector, I’m glad she waited to tell you, because the less people who know, the better, it’s not even because you’re a Luthor, it’s just common sense. But as your friend. . . she was wrong not to tell you, and you deserved to know the truth. It’s not always black and white, sometimes good intentions make for bad actualities. I can understand why Kara didn’t tell you, and I can also understand why you’re upset. I’m just saying, sometimes things don’t work out the way we want them to, sometimes we lie to the people we love and sometimes we think we know what’s best for them, even when we don't.

“But no matter what happens between you and my sister, just know that you’re still my friend, and I still support you. I know we’re not as close as you and Kara, but I’m here for you; if you need me. “

“You’re here for me?” Lena asks incredulously.

“I’m am, and I’m sorry you got the raw end of the stick. If it were anyone but Kara, I’d go beat her up for you. In fact, I have a red sun room for training, I still can if you really want me to.”

Lena’s voice breaks in a sob, and Alex stares at her strangely.

“Oh god, don’t cry. I don’t know what to do with criers, please don’t.” she holds out her arms and Lena collapses into them. “Do you want a hug? Will a hug help? I can do a hug.” She whispers as rock solid arms close around Lena.

Are both of the Danvers sisters jacked?

“Did you really shoot Kara down with Kryptonite arrows?” Lena hiccups.

“Yeah, I did. One of the biggest regrets of my life. Just like I’m sure not telling you the truth is one of Kara’s.”

“You’re her sister, you’re supposed to say that.”

“Look, maybe I am. But I don’t have to say this - stay mad for a while, she deserves it. But I hope to see you around soon, game night just isn’t the same without you.”

Lena wants to say more, but she doesn’t, letting Alex pull away.

“I couldn’t tell you the truth, because I’ve been protecting Kara since she was 13 years old. But that doesn’t mean you didn’t deserve to know the truth.”

“Easy for you to say. You were in on the secret.”

“I was.” Alex concedes. “And now you are too, what are you going to do with it?”

Lena doesn’t answer, and Alex backs away.

“I have to get back to National City, but call me when you come home, ok?”

Lena nods, even though she’s unsure of the details of her returning to National City.

She feels the warmth of Alex’s hug long after the other woman is gone.

* - - — - - - - - - - -

She stays in Metropolis for a month and a half, a fact she’s sure Jess and Dr. Fowler are conspiring together towards.

She can’t deny that she feels exceptionally better on the plane ride to National City than she did on her trip to Metropolis.

She hates to admit it, but therapy really has helped her, and she has Dr. Fowler’s number stored in her phone and ready for face time sessions.

She doesn’t exactly forgive Kara, but she maybe understands where she was coming from - even if she doesn’t agree with it.

Still, she doesn’t expect what she finds when she comes back to National City.

Supergirl is no where to be found.

According to all reports that she can find, Supergirl disappeared two weeks after she did. It makes sense, she supposes, but what she doesn’t understand is where Kara is now.

Lena's back now, so where is Supergirl?

She tempted to text Kara and ask, but she holds out, unwilling to give in like that. Curiosity isn’t enough to send her crawling back. The anger has faded, but the hurt still lingers. She misses the Kara that she used to know, but she still isn’t sure where she stands now.

A few days after she comes back, she meets Alex for lunch - at a craft beer bar, because Dr. Fowler says it’s important for her be around people who care and she figures Alex is the closest she’s got. But still, she refuses to ask about Kara, and Alex doesn’t offer any information; though she does insist on meeting up again soon.  

Despite the million other things she has to do, one question overtakes her mind.

Where is Kara?

A look at CatCo records reveals that she’s been clocking in to work as scheduled, so maybe the question she should really be asking is ‘where is Supergirl?’

Later, back at her apartment,  she pulls out the switch that Kara sent her and sets it on her coffee table. An hour of staring at it doesn’t give her anymore answers than she had before.

* - - - - - — - - - - -

She finally gets her answer a week later when a school bus is locked up in a battle  with a few aliens. The bus stop is on her walk to get coffee, so she gets an unintentional front row view.

Her mind is racing, trying to think of some way to help in this post-Supergirl world that they're apparently in.  Luckily the DEO vans show up just as she’s debating how weaponize a fire hydrant, and she breathes a sigh of relief.

She breathes an even bigger sigh when Supergirl shows up out of nowhere to join the fight, and all of National City + Lena is enthralled. Especially when she sees Kara’s new suit.

It’s an all blue, skin tight number that Lena definitely hasn’t seen before, and the missing skirt adds to the attractiveness.  

Unfortunately, it doesn’t do much to distract Lena from the fight, especially when Kara puts herself in unnecessary danger.

The anger she thought she was over is back, only this time, it’s for Kara.

How dare Supergirl put her friend in danger like that, by fighting that horribly! Her speed is definitely slowed, and some of her movements are jerky and uncoordinated. Frankly, she looks like a prize fighter that took an extended leave of absence and showed up to the championship match without even a warm-up.

Which, Lena supposes, is exactly what happened.

She holds her breath for what feels like hours, refusing to exhale until the hostile alien is deposited with the waiting DEO agents nearby and Kara is safely on the ground.

She knows the exact moment that Kara spots her, shoulders tensing and her forehead crinkling.

Grinding her teeth, she watches as Kara takes a tentative step in her direction.

“Kara."

“Lena, I -"

If Kara had gotten hurt because Supergirl was on some hare-brained, self righteous mission to just jump back into action without even making sure she’s ready, Lena’s going to . . .

Well, she doesn’t really know what she’s going to do.

In fact, she barely realizes she’s made a decision until her fist is halfway to Supergirl’s face.

Bad move.

Stupid brain.

Thankfully, Kara shifts with the punch, but it still feels like she laid a haymaker into a brick wall.

“Shit! Shit! Fuck!” she doubles over, clutching at her hand, but soft fingers pry her hands apart and cold air leaves a frosty mist over her bruised knuckles as Kara uses her freeze breath to soothe the sting.

“Nothing’s broken, thankfully. Damn it, Lena, you really could have hurt yourself, you have to be careful -“

“I have to be careful?! I have to be careful?! I’m not the one who’s going around fighting aliens when it looks like I barely remember how to fly!”

To her surprise, Kara actually looks remorseful.

“I tried, Lena, I tried so hard, not to be Supergirl, but I -“ she gestures at the school bus. “- the kids, Lena, I couldn’t let them die just because -“

Lena interrupts her.

“You tried to stop being Supergirl?” That would certainly explain things, but it’s a concept Lena has a hard time wrapping her head around. “Why?”

Even as she towers over Lena in her cape and boots, Kara still somehow looks so small.

“Because you hate Supergirl, and I didn’t want you to hate me. I thought maybe if I could stop being Supergirl then maybe - well, I don’t know what I thought, but . . .”

Kara continues to speak, but Lena stops listening.

Instead, her eyes settle on something glinting in the sunlight.

A white gold chain around Kara’s neck, the sapphire of the pendant nearly hidden in the blue of her suit.

Suddenly, everything is too much.

Horns are honking, people are talking, and there’s a stupid bird that just won’t SHUT UP. Almost before she can make out what’s happening, Lena finds herself at the brink of a panic attack.

“Kara,” she fights to stay upright, holding up  a hand to stop the flow of the other woman’s words. “Get me out of here.”

“What?”

“Get me out of here, please.”

“Where do you want to go?”

“Anywhere, please, just - “

Before she can blink, Kara’s scoops her up and they’re flying off. She has no idea where Kara is taking her, but it takes long enough that by the time they touch down, her panic attack is mostly over; Kara’s strong grip and the white noise of the wind working wonders.

They land on a deserted beach, and Lena looks out over the ocean for a long moment, trying to place where they are.

Until Kara clears her throat.

“Umm, should I like . . . put you down? I mean if you want me to hold you that’s fine, you’re really light, I just umm, well I didn’t know if you wanted to -“

“Kara.” she squeezes the shoulder under her hand, bringing the adorable rambling to a stop. “It’s fine, you can put me down, thank you.”

“Right, umm, here.” Kara bends, lowering her arm so that Lena’s feet can reach the ground, and she uses Kara’s for balance before stepping away.

“You know if I would have known it was really Kara Danvers holding me all those times you saved me, I would have enjoyed it a lot more.” Lena says without thinking, and Kara blushes all the way to the tips of her ears.

“Sorry!” she immediately backtracks. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that, it was just awkward, and I thought ‘why not make it more awkward?’”

“No, it’s fine! I mean I like holding you.”

The awkward tension lingers between them for a long moment before Lena breaks it, turning to stare out over the ocean. She waits until Kara steps up beside her to speak.

“Where are we?”

"Somewhere in the Caribbean? I don’t know the exact coordinates, just a little place I found when I was looking for a place to think and look at the stars after you . . . after you left.”

“It’s beautiful.” Lena observes, and she can feel Kara’s eyes studying her profile. After a moment, she turns to look at Kara too, taking in the face she used to know so well.

“You cut your bangs.” she finally says, and Kara blinks at her from beneath the fringe.

“Well, you said you hated my ‘stupid hair’, so . . . “ Kara shrugs, and Lena holds back a smile.

“Is that why you changed your suit too?”

“No!” Kara’s forehead crinkles. “Maybe. Yes. I just didn’t want you to hate me anymore.”

“I don’t hate you.”

“You hate Supergirl.” Kara counters.

Lena turns back to the ocean with a sigh.

“A while back, my therapist asked me how I felt about Supergirl, apart from you. And when she asked, I didn’t know what to say, because I wasn’t sure. But I’ve had some time to think about it, and I’ve come to some conclusions.”

She faces Kara before continuing.

“Supergirl is . . . she is kind, and she is good, and she's saved my life on numerous occasions. But she is also self-righteous, and arrogant, and stubborn - almost to the point of being foolhardy on occasion. . . She broke my heart once.”

Lena’s voice cracks, and her eyes fill with tears as Kara’s head drops to look at her boots.

“But she also made the decision to put on that suit and help people - people who don’t always deserve it - at great risk to herself. She could just hide away her powers and be a reporter and spend her Thursday nights playing scrabble with her friends instead of putting out factory fires. And I would love that person, because that person is enough. But instead she chooses to use her powers for good, she puts her life on the line to protect people. And for some reason she has this deeply rooted belief that people are good; even when I know for a fact that she’s seen some of the worst that humanity has to offer.”

“Lena -“

“Let me finish.” she says gently and Kara nods, tears streaking down her face.

“I don’t hate you, Kara. I could never hate you. And it’s taken a lot of therapy, and a lot of long talks with Alex, but . . .” She takes a moment to put her words in order.

“The way I see it, I have two options. I can move to a new city. I can work at a different office in a different state where nothing will be tainted with your memory and I can pretend like Kara Danvers never existed. But I don’t like that option.”

Kara’s face lightens marginally, but her eyes are still wary.

“What’s option two?”

“Option two is that I forgive you, and we start over. This time with no secrets - not about our identities, or our feelings, or our pasts. I want it all out on the table, and I want us to try. And it may not work and it won’t be easy, and I want you to see Dr. Fowler with me. But my heart has been shattered, regardless, and I can either fix it with you or without you, and I want to do it with you; because life is so much better with you in it. Even the bad parts.” The tears spill over now, and she chokes out a sob, Kara’s face crumpling.

“Lena, I am so sorry. And I never in a million years meant to hurt you. You’re my red sun. You make me feel so grounded, and home. And I realize now that I was using you as crutch to deal with this double life I lead, and I thought maybe somehow if I kept you separate then things would be different. But I was so wrong to do that to you. I should have told you the truth years ago, and I promise I will never keep secrets from you again. I will do whatever I have to, to make this work. I’ll go to therapy, I’ll communicate, I’ll literally fly to the moon if I have to.”

“Will you share your potstickers?” Lena can’t help asking, desperate to lighten the mood, if only for a second.

Kara sobs a laugh.

“You can have all the potstickers. I would never eat a potsticker again if it would make you happy. I would do anything you asked of me and not give it a second thought to show you how sorry I am.”

Lena studies her for long moment.

“Would you really give up being Supergirl for me?”

“Lena . . . I don’t think you understand. You’ve made me indestructible. Whatever weakness I still have under this yellow sun, you’ve come up with the technology to fix it. Nothing from earth can hurt me. But that day on the rooftop, when you walked away . . . it was like watching Krypton explode all over again. And there’s some sort of poetic justice about the person who made me indestructible also being the only one who can bring me to my knees. But would I give up Supergirl for you. I think showed today that I’m not very good at giving it up, but I would try again, for you.”

Lena can see the sincerity in her eyes, in the way that her arms are halfway outstretched as if just waiting for an invitation to pull Lena into a hug.

“I would never ask you to give up a part of who you are. In fact the reason that I was so upset when I found out was because you felt like you had to hide it from me in the first place. I want you to be yourself, and Supergirl is part of you; I just need you to share her with me.”

Kara nods slowly.

“I can do that.”

They stand there, staring at each other on the beach, the waves lapping against the shore, and for the first time since Lex told her the truth, Lena feels at peace.

“I know this is kind of awkward but . . . can I have a hug? I really missed your hugs.” Lena shifts awkwardly in the sand, but she shouldn’t have worried, because Kara’s eyes light up and her mouth twists into the soft smile that Lena loves so much.

“Of course, get in here, bring it in.” Kara’s arms widen even further, and she takes a step towards Lena before wrapping her up in a bear hug.

“I’ve missed you so much.” Kara whispers against her hair. “I was afraid that I’d never get you back.”

For a few long minutes, Lena just lets herself breathe, content in the way that Kara’s arms are just slightly too tight around her, her fingers clutching at Kara’s cape.

“It’s kind of weird, hugging you in the suit.” She says, finally breaking the silence.

“I can change?" Kara offers, starting to pull away, but Lena holds her in place.

“No, I wanna get used to it. I can’t limit my hug time to just when you’re not in the suit.”

Kara settles at that, and Lena waits another minute before she pulls away, unable to stop the smile that’s spreading across her face.

As much as it hurts, it’s good to have Kara back.

“So what now?” Kara asks, seemingly nervous in the aftermath of their hug.

“Now we’re going to get dinner. I’m picking,” she clarifies, “and paying, because it’s going to be fancy, and I’m going to make you eat vegetables.”

Kara’s nose scrunches.

“Fancy just means smaller portions.”

“Perks of being a billionaire, I can buy you as much food as you can eat.”

Kara’s nose stays scrunched, but she doesn’t complain further, so Lena continues.

“Then we’re going to talk, we’re going to lay everything out in the open, and we’re going to start this off right.”

“Your place? Or Mine?"

“Yours please, I left my NCU sweatshirt there last time I was over, and I want to get it back.”

“I’m sorry, your NCU sweatshirt?” Kara scoffs.

Lena raises an eyebrow.

“I went to NCU and I’m the one who bought that shirt!”

Lena’s eyebrow gets even closer to her hairline.

“You went to MIT!” Kara insists, and they face off for a moment before Kara finally caves.

“Fine, it’s your sweatshirt. That you sometimes let me borrow when it stops smelling like me and you don’t want to wear it anymore.”

Lena blushes at being caught in her scheme, and Kara grins.

“Ha! I knew it! It was always suspicious when it would randomly show back up.”

The glare Lena gives her is withering, but it does little to shrink Kara’s grin.

“Will you please take me home? Before I decide to add a plate of Brussel sprouts to our order just for you.”

“Geez, I was just joking, you didn’t have to bring Brussel sprouts into this!” Kara says with a laugh before stepping forward.

For the second time that day, Kara bends to scoop Lena up into her arms, but before she can, a thought strikes Lena and she taps Kara on the shoulder.

“Kara, before we go, I just have one more question.”

“Anything.”

“Why are you wearing the necklace?”

“Oh.” Kara’s hand reaches up to grip the pendant between her fingers. "That’s easy, because my best friend gave it to me, and then she disappeared, so this was the best way I had to keep her close.”

And Lena knows that they should probably take this slow, and they still have so much to talk about, but something about those blue eyes makes her lose all self control.

She leans forward, one hand  on Kara’s crest and the other on her cheek, and brings their lips together. She’s imagined kissing Kara more times than she’d like to admit, and she’s envisioned so many different possibilities for how it would be, but reality?

Reality is positively mind blowing.

For a moment, Kara seems stunned, but then she steps into the kiss; arms wrapping around Lena’s back and pulling her in.

It’s the best kiss of Lena’s entire existence, and as Kara’s lips move under hers, she can’t help but think that some things are worth fighting for, no matter the cost. Because not everyone is out to hurt her, and some people really do have good intentions -  at least that’s Dr. Fowler tells her. And maybe, she can start believing it too.

All too soon, Kara’s lips pull away, though her hands stay where they are - inching dangerously close to Lena’s backside.

“So just to clarify -“ Kara starts, and Lena takes a little pleasure in the way her cheeks are flushed and her breath is coming in puffs.

“Are we at the kissing stage now? Or this a one time thing? It’s cool either way, I just don’t want to overstep -“

“Kara Danvers!” Lena cuts her off with a laugh. “Shut up and kiss me.”

“Oh, wait, cause while we’re being open and honest -“

Lena’s heart rate spikes.

“- My real name is Kara Zor-El.”

“Zor-El, huh?”

Kara nods, a contented smile on her face.

“It sounds nice when you say it.”

“Well then, Kara Zor-el, shut up and kiss me."

And if she thought kissing Kara the first time was good, the second time?

Even better.

[facepalming-since-chernobyl]

Can we talk about how Lena was never trully good and piss off my stalkers?

Let’s start with her early life, shit taken from her fabulous Arrowverse Wikia page, written by a hormonal, brainwashed kid with Lena’s panties in a skull:

Aside of the dumb as fuck plot to kill her “Irish” Mother So CW Can Stop Wasting Money On Lena’s Actress Accent Coach, this was said by Lena, Age 20 Something. Where is the problem? Lena,  Age 20 Something is old enough, and so called genius, to understand that her 4 year old ass couldn’t do a shit in that situation (well, she could drown along wiith her mother *stares longingly at the wasted potential*). So, Lena The Age 20 Something tells this traumatasing for everyone’s ears story to make herself look sympathetic. Or she is super fucking dumb, but the writers try to tell us she is a so called genius. Ouch.

Planning a shit for months that in the end RUINS someone’s life and “regrets” it (*Len a sniffs, wipping her tears with a silky handkerchief that is worth 1500$*) is well, a perfect example of a future sociopath. Also, notice how she still remembers how Lilian was proud of her. Aka destroying someone’s life maybe was a bad thing to do, but her adoptive mother was PROUD of her. This is an example of what is the most important thing for Lena - her EGO and constant praise of her HORRIBLE adoptive mother.

You won’t find it on wikia page (wonder why *sarcasm*) that Lena threw a microscope at Jack - her boyfriend, what is hey!, a violent, abusive, toxic behavior!

Aka Lena The Snowflake Queen has NEVER stood behind a man... only behind Lex’s back... as long as he was in the picture...and she became the CEO of LuthorCorp only after... he was out of the picture... because....that’s the easiest shit to do. And she ceased contact with Lilian... because she GOT WHAT SHE WANTED. Earlier she didn’t mind Lilian and Lex’ shady shit and did nothing to stop that, huh? Wonder why. This is called not standing behind men’s back. Brothers are not men, I guess?

Insted of kicking the young mother to her home, to spend time with her daughter, Lena The Slave Driver (too soon? :) and The White Face Of Aggressive Capitalism gives her a blessing. And this article suggests that everything what Sam achived was all to Lena, not her own abilities. Feminism, yay!

Because who cares about people’s privacy when they are not humans but some alien scum, right? You can’t ask for people’s believes or sexuality but can easily check your neighbour origin! Yay! Who cares that alienphobes would buy it for horrible reasons? Because moneeeey, moneeeeey, moneeeeey! 

Btw, remember how Lena was pissed off at Rhea, because she was ALIEN? It was not because the lie, it was because dear Rhea was alien, so hello ALIENPHOBIC Lena :D Also, Lena ignored Rhea lied to her and just followed The Daxamite Queen like a lost puppy only because Rhea praised her ass. Lena was easily manipulated, because oh her mommy and ego issues xD Cheer for the genius!

Btw, remember how big damage the Phorians did to National City BECAUSE of Lena’s exeperiments with the portal? And again, she didn’t face any consequecens. 

Remember how  because of this portal she can stop starvation blah blah blah? Well, nah, it’s all about her ego. And after Daxamite invasion, what she has done about that starvation? NADA :’) She proved her portal works, who cares about the rest.

What happens next? A hostile Daxamite army invades USA THANKS TO LENA and... nothing happens. How many people died? How many buildings were destroyed? Did Snowflake Lena meet any consequences? Did they accuse her of being a TRAITOR? She is not a traitor, her brainwashed minions say. Yeah? Think about Snowden and Assange. And now you can laugh.

Then she spreads lead into atmosphere and yep, nothing happens. Weirdly, no other country is pissed off that some American bitch spread fucking lead all over whole fucking world. Who cares, American capitalism! *Afghanistan, Iraq, South American countries, Vietnam, South Korea stare into the void*

Lena buys CatCo ONLY to keep her name clean and - Money, money money!

Plus, Lena reveals she didn’t talk with Kara for months (friendship goals! pure heart! friendship over work!).

Few things here:

1)during it, Edge’s bodyguard was killed, what means that Lena getting what she wants is more important than random people lives

2)she did that on a gala, full of innocent, not aware of the danger people. She purposely put them in the danger

3)getting that record of Edge’s confession was absolutely illegal and any judge would fucking die hearing how she got it

4)she corrupted Kara to do this shit

5)cried about how ONLY her friends keep her from crossing a line - bitch, you already crossed that and your friends should take your ass to a psychologist, lol

6) did i mention that Edge’s BODYGUARD WAS KILLED?

(And now a short break for a laugh:

My poor Lena’s phone! What have you done to piss Sam so much? :((((( )

Also hey, Lena is a gun lover. 

During this time, Lena was experimenting on Sam. Alone. Not telling anyone. Because you know, EGO issues. She told DEO only when her ass was satrting to burn.

We are glad that Lena’s stans are aware she constantly LIE and loves EXCUSES of her shitty actions. KUDOS, guys!

Also yeaaaah, I reluctantly intend to tell my father I destroyed his fave  set of stamps. Someday. But after 10 years he is still not aware so maybe, not today, yeah.

Also, Lena plays the “innocent victim” when she reveals she produces Kryptonite. That can be used only to kill Kryptonians, but she doesn’t see why Supergirl is so pissed off. It’s not like it’s some 100% deadly weapon for Kara Zor El and her cousin. Calm down your tits, Supergirl, ok? Every day Lena can choke to death eating fucking avocado and she doesn’t throw tantrums about it!

And then Lena basically used Harun-El for her own experiments. Did she tell Alura she stole some of it? Nah. Did she inform anyone about her experiments? Naah. Why when she can play a god?

Remmeber Ben Lockwood? That horribly written bad guy? Who turned evil because Lena The Capitalistic Bitch Who Swims In Money didn’t help his father’s bancrupting factory? Becasue:

When you think about, if Lena wouldn’t have been a white typical American aggressive capitalistic bitch focused on making money and doing illegal experiments, there hadn’t been Agent Liberty. I think it’s hilarious. Lena wants to “help” the world *cough* by polluting it? *cough*  by some fucking useless portals, while all she needs to do is helping people and saving their buisness :D

Then we have some sweet talk including Lena and her so called friends, about powering up humans. And we clearly see that Lena wants to play a god, because of her EGO. Who decides who is good enough to be powered up? Lena. Who holds the power to make humans superpowered? Lena. Who doesn’t say a shit about these experiments and doing it in secret? Lena. 

And here comes our poor young Adam. Adam, who is depressed because of his brother’s death and driven by guilt. And Lena, for some fucking reason, choses him. UHM? And then, even if she KNOWS this experiment is deadly (no SANE scientist allows human trials when the possibility of death is higher than 1% - (you have animal trials for it for fuck’s sake), that is a FACT, in Lena’s case it was about 40%? or even more). But he filled the aplication! Yeah, and this makes it legal, LOL. But Lena wanted to stop it and he FORCED her to keep doing! Yeaaaaaah, depressed, driven by guilt kid forced poor innocent Lena to kill him. Holy crap! Lena! You poor baby!!!!

No shit guys, LENA IS MURDERER. And she doesn’t tell anyone, becasuse she knows it was illegal.

But! But! But! GOVERMENT knows! She works for them!!! Yeah, she works for alienphobic goverment and Ben Lockwood, what can go wrong?! :DDDD

And then, she basically saved a mass murderer and helped him escape.

How the FUCK her ass is not rotting in jail is a mystery, but I guess when you are a white loaded American capitalist you can do whatever shit you want and won’t meet consequecnes of your actions. 

And now cheer for Lena The Snowflake Queen Luthor stans who love her and don’t see a one single thing in her doings - it’s good to be murderer’s apologist, huh? :D

(all caps taken from Lena’s wikia page -> x)

I want to dedicate this post to my stalkers aka KramReceipt crowd from twitter - please, be more butthurt in the future, I have more ideas to expose your Snowflake Queen ;*

Also

[overwatchladieslover]

The requests

So, to summarise what I’ve said before : in order to go through all of the requests without having me lose what’s left of my mind, we are going to have to limit each reaction to a maximum of 4 ladies by request. If you’ve already dropped in an ask, I’m going to have to ask you to find your ask among the 28 that were still in our inbox, and answer in the tags which characters you want for your request, here’s an example: #Request3MercyPharah. 

Thank you for your understanding, the requests are under the cut in order not to wreck your dashboard. 

Mod Ecyan

1

How would the ladies react to being saved from Talon/Brainswashing/whatever by their s/o? P.S: Your writing is great

2

What would it be like to be in poly mercy/reader/widowmaker relationship? ((Would there be lots of bickering? Would they be overprotective? Would there be cuddling?)) also could you give some separate sfw or nsfw headcanons for being in a relationship with either of them? I love you're blog btw! I'm sorry for the long ask.

3

What's that moment in which the ladies realize they have fell so hard in love with their s/o?

4

Well if request are open may I request the ladies with an s/o who's like superman like has the same abilities that superman has

5

Heya, just found this blog and I love it! Can I drop a request for either a s/o readjusting to work or being forced to retire from working with Overwatch with the ladies? Dunno if it has been done before because I'm still scrolling through the blog :') Hope you're having a great day when you see this ^^

6

Your Halloween skins post just gave me an idea! Could you please write monster AU headcanons for the ladies (what they are, how they act) and how they would treat their human S/O? Merci beaucoup!

7

Request for how the overwatch ladies deal with a high-functioning autistic s/o and how they help them cope with symptoms/quirks that come with it. (Would prefer to have female pronouns but gender neutral is also fine). ♥ Thank you ♥

8

Hey, just wanted to say I love your posts!! They're simply amazing! I was also wondering if you could do an imagine where the ladies find out they're s/o is a supernatural being?

9

Could I request headcannons for an s/o who sprained there ankle and can't walk for a week.(because that's what I did and I need some love)

10

you are honestly a very awesome writer and I appreciate you a lot for making this blog, so, could I request the ladies finding out that their s/o ran away from home because they had a very very bad situations at home, like they comfort them about it?

 11

ayy yo, hope you're having a great day! How about a s/o, who has no connection to Overwatch, planning out the perfect home dinner date for Ana, Mercy, Pharah and Tracer. Maybe their s/o falls asleep waiting for them to come home, probably still sat at the table. (I am weak for fluff AND those four... Overwatch ladies killing me a day at a time..)

12

What if the girls s/o got blamed for a death that they didn't do and then overwatch is after them? Sorry can't think of anything better

13

How about the ladies going to an ice hockey match to support their s/o and the team they're on and their s/o getting a concussion or a broken nose from getting hit by someones stick/the puck? Hope you're having a great day when you see this ^^

14

If it wouldn't be too much to ask can I request a Mercy x reader fanfic, were the reader is in their early twenties and tries to get mercy to go out with them but Mercy is on the fence about it because she feels awkward about the age difference but she finally agrees to go on the date and you can decide how it ends. Please and thank you

15

My first request is a tall order so here we go: how would the ladies react if they found out that their (kinda?) rival in Talon is only doing what they do cuz Talon has their family (1 member or whole family?) & the only way to keep them safe is to use their 'skills' against Overwatch. What do they think/do about it? Bonus points if they had a love/hate relationship before they discovered this & if u include HOW they discovered it ~ thank you love the blog btw this has been 🐙 anon xxx

16

How would the overwatch ladies react to finding out that their crush or s/o has a similar origin to the black widow? As in came from a place like the Red Room & escaped & went freelance before they joined Overwatch (If u need me to elaborate at all feel free to message me!) thank you xx

17

The ladies react to the new recruit (eventual s/o?) having a Sherlock level intellect? Thank you! Xx🐙

18

Could I have the Overwatch ladies with a Fem s/o who has a massive praise kink please? (also just wanted to say that this blog is fantastic, thank you! ♥)

19

Can I get the ladies reacting to finding their (gender neutral) s/o bloody, bruised & broken on the ground after battle, barely conscious but before they pass out they ask them to marry them. How do they react to finding them, the question & what do they do when they wake up in the medbay? Thank you! Xx 🐙

 20

🐙 Hiya! Ily ladies! Here's my idea: the teams been hearing about a masked vigilante going after Talon & other criminals and obviously they want to know who it is but they're like a ghost until one day Tracer comes into the base & introduces them as her s/o (who reveals themselves), how do the other ladies react? bonus points if vigilante!s/o is known for being intimidating & brutal but they are totally kind & sweet irl especially w Lena 💕

21

he ladies are happily sleeping until they feel something wrong. Then they notice their s/o looks really sick and has a lot of fever. It is unusual for them to get sick but once they are it is something to be worried. How do they react to this and take care of them later?

22

ladies try to netflix and chill with s/o??

23

How would the ladies react if their s/o was still recovering from a past love that ruined them emotionally by just leading them on and then leaving?(i swear to god i love this blog it made feel better after having a shitty night, love you<3)

24

Wonder what would happen if the ladies accidentally caught their s/o masturbating to them?

25

So the team is visiting a hospital for Christmas to give the patients and their families a great time. The best part? All of them are wearing Christmas' costumes. Let the fun begin!

26

If you're down for some nsfw, how would the ladies react to their s/o moaning their names.

27

This blog is like a blessing, seriously. Can I get short focus for the ladies when their s/o who was seemingly dead for two years comes back as a masked vigilante with a personal army, hellbent on destroying Overwatch for seemingly "abandoning" them. I know it sounds like Reaper, but I got the idea from The Arkham Knight. Keep up your amazing work! (And your amazing looks!)

28

I don't know if your still taking requests but if so about this. How would the Overwatch ladies react to finding out that their s/o is actually a Talon secret agent? Bonus points if its angsty.