nb-microdosing-testosterone

[templeofvengeance]

@hearthoftaweret

"KHONSHU!"

The shrill cry echoed around the temple, followed by the sudden thudding steps of someone moving in a rush. Taweret's wide grin lit up her muzzle as she looked around the lonely Temple of the Moon God, searching for its denizen.

"Are you home? So sorry for running out on our last conversation," she chuckled and shook her head, causing the beaded ornaments in her hair to clink together merrily. "I've been so busy lately, too much to do never enough time, I'm afraid." She stopped in the middle of the holy space, cocking her hands on her hips and lifting her gaze up to look at the massive statue of the God in question. "Hmm... Have I caught you at a bad time?"

"Would it matter if you did?"

Khonshu's voice boomed from behind her, the temple's god manifesting in a swirl of sand and dust, his staff going tump against the stones-- though despite the words (and how ornery he always acted) he didn't actually sound upset. There was rarely a good reason for other gods to want to speak to him, especially since his banishment from the Ennead. Khonshu wasn't foolish enough to hope that the fight against Ammit had shifted the status quo, but one thing couldn't be denied: Taweret had done him a favor. Several, probably.

Not for his sake, of course. For the world's. Still, he wouldn't have been freed without her guiding Layla, and Marc would likely still be dead (he assumes she played some role with all that.) In some backwards way, they'd been a team. The only two gods that had been able to stand against Ammit in the end, the only two avatars available to seal her away for good. Not that Khonshu didn't do most of the work.

That fact alone granted her grace he wouldn't have afforded to an intruder like Osiris. ... Even if he always thought her a bit too chatty. (Probably got along with Steven, if they met in the Duat.)

"I expected that the Duat was thrown into turmoil, sorting out the hearts of those Ammit judged," Khonshu commiserated, before just cutting to the chase, "What is it you want?"

[sehetep-shenwer]

UPG, hastily pasted from my dream journal, that may or may not be connected to the one I just posted

Dream abt driving around until I stopped at this store

For some reason I could read the energy of one of the owners, a scrawny redneck trying to sell me an amish plow, and he was bad so i went inside. There was some weird swimming pool and I guess it was a public one cuz one of the employees, a distressed middle aged woman, was trying to help get it set up for this one bratty family.

While this was happening I found a glass shelf with some books on it, but in particular a couple books on Isis (one of them literally said Isis and sumtin else, depicting Her heiroglyph), which freaks me out now cuz for me today is her epagomenal day. There was a book depicting some goddess with a vulture head dress. I gasped excitedly but I dont think I got them cuz it mightve been too expensive

Then I saw a shelf full of movies and games u could rent and buy, including VHS tapes. Wut stuck out to me abt the vhs tapes was there was one of a brand new movie somehow. I think it was called Batman and Henet but the cover looked like it was for a different movie maybe as a bootleg tactic or something.

I've never heard of Henet b4 up until this dream.

It played a trailer and the characters didn't look like neither batman or Henet at all, but then some couple wanted to rent it but couldn't figure out the vcr so I helped them get it.

Then the dream ended, but I also woke up briefly a few times cuz the power went out and each time I did, I was visualizing Taweret cuddling me

[joyful-soul-collector]

The events of Moon Knight took place in early 2012, and after Marc and Steven found out Jake was still working for Khonshu, they decided they needed a fresh start. So Layla and the boys moved to New York City, where they continued to be Moon Knight and Scarlet Scarab, and with Steven's confidence and stubborn will, they learned to work with Khonshu in a way where they wouldn't be manipulated.

However, with their luck Marc should've expected their new peace wouldn't last for long, because just a month after their move a large hole opened up in the sky over Stark Tower, and aliens began their siege on NYC. So now we just have one question left...

How does the Battle of New York change when you add in a little bit of Moon Knight?

“For the record Marc, I think this is a really, really terrible idea, most people tend to run away from the giant aliens,” Steven muttered, staring up at the massive rip in the sky over Stark Tower. “I mean… aliens, Marc. Bloody aliens.”

“Yeah. I know, buddy,” Marc sighed. He could swear they were cursed. They’d just moved here after everything that happened with Harrow and finding out Jake still worked for Khonshu which technically means they all still work for Khonshu and--god, why is it that every time Marc tries to get a clean slate it just gets messed up worse than the last one?

At least Layla wasn’t here. She was on a trip for Taweret, something about a weird metal in Africa? She didn’t say much about it, just that she’d be back in a few days. 

Now looking through the massive hole in the wall of their brand new apartment on the 20th floor, Marc just hoped that wherever she was, she didn’t have giant aliens flying towards her through a split in the heavens. 

It was the biggest thing they’d ever seen. A long, eel-like creature swimming down through the sky and between buildings, armored aliens springing from its metal hide. Even with Captain America, Iron Man, and Thor down there fighting, they all knew they couldn’t just leave New York to fend for itself.

“Look alive, hermanos,” Jake said, now looking down at the city below them, and the grey, shiny bodies of the aliens crawling up the side of the buildings. Marc summoned the suit and leapt out the hole in the building, a roar in his chest as he sank a dart into the fleshy back of one of the aliens. He leapt off the building and their cape formed into its crescent glider, giving them a moment to take in the scene. 

“Khonshu!” Marc shouted over the wind in their ears. “What the hell are these things!?”

“The Chitauri and their Leviathan!” Khonshu replied, nowhere to be seen, but his hard voice heard clearly. “A hivemind race from a planet not of our own, the perfect army! But why they’re here I do not--oh hell.”

Marc looked around to see what Khonshu noticed and his eyes fell upon a Chitauri spacecraft flying past, though this one was not piloted by a fleshy grey alien like the others. 

“Loki,” Khonshu growled. “Of course.”

“You know this asshole?!” Marc shouted, watching as this “Loki” soared through the sky. He dodged other Chitauri and explosions all the way, and his bright gold horns glinted in the sun. 

“He is another god, brother of Thor and prince of Asgard!” Khonshu responded. “He’s always been an idiot, but I never thought he’d be stupid enough to do this!”

“Goddammit Khonshu, why is everyone you know an asshole?” Marc muttered. 

“I heard that!”

Marc ignored him and dove down, swinging his feet forward and slamming them into a nearby flying craft. He knocked the pilot from its controls, keeping it from smashing into a building just in time. However as the craft began to lose control, Marc quickly realized he hadn’t really thought this plan out. 

“Shit shit shit shit shit--”

“Dammit, Marc!” Steven suddenly fronted, shifting into his Mr. Knight suit and jumping from the craft, tumbling onto the roof of a building before it crashed onto the street below. “What the hell was that, Marc!? You’re gonna get us killed!”

“I’m sorry, I’ve never fought aliens before, Steven! Give me a fucking break!”

“Both of you shut up!” Jake shouted suddenly, his black suit appearing over their body. “None of us knows what the fuck we’re doing!”

“They do,” Khonshu said. They looked up at the tall bird standing next to them, and he swung his long beak over to point at the giant eel-like creature (Leviathan, Khonshu called it?) swimming through the air. It was then that Marc finally noticed something flying right in front of its nose, red and gold metal soaring between buildings. 

“Iron Man,” Steven muttered, squinting at the figure. “What in the hell is he doing?”

They watched as Iron Man flew low to the ground, the Leviathan following close behind, right towards a small group in the middle of the street. One of the people started to walk forward, and as he did his form changed, green skin ripping through his shirt and growing until suddenly the Hulk appeared in his place, his fist slamming into the nose of the giant alien with a defiant roar. 

Marc, Steven, and Jake all watched in awe as the monster flipped head over tail, its armor falling away until Iron Man shot a series of flares at it, causing the creature to explode. A magnificent shower of fire, metal, and flesh rained down on the street, evidence of the Leviathan’s quick death.

“Dios mio,” Jake breathed. “Yeah. They know what they’re doing.”

“Oh thank god,” Steven muttered. “I didn’t want to be the one to come up with a plan.”

“What makes you think you’d come up with the plan?” Marc leapt off the building and deployed their glider again, angling them towards the group.

“You’re the one who almost put us in the same position as that Leviathan,” Steven muttered. Marc sighed and rolled his eyes. 

It’s not like he didn’t have a point. Didn’t mean he had to like it though. 

He landed with a roll in an alleyway near the group of superheroes, but rather than stepping into sight, something made him stop. Or rather, some one.  

“What is it?” Marc snapped, frowning at his frozen feet. “C’mon, they need our help.”

“I didn’t come here just to get told what to do,” Jake growled. “We’ll listen in, see what their plan is, and fill in the gaps. I’m not lookin’ to get ordered around by the Knight in Shining Red, White, and Blue.”

“Oh my fucking--fine, fine, whatever, do it your way like we always--”

“Bloody hell, will you shut up, I can’t hear them!”

Steven crouched low behind a thoroughly wrecked car and peered through its shattered windows, letting his mask fall away and straining his ears to hear what they were saying. 

“Alright, listen up,” Captain America’s clear voice said. “Until we can close that portal, our priority is containment.” He turned to a man with a bow and quiver of arrows. “Barton, I want you on that roof. Eyes on everything. Call out patterns and strays.” Then to Iron Man. “Stark, you got the perimeter. Anything gets more than three blocks out, you turn it back or you turn it to ash.”

A moment later Stark and Barton soared up into the sky, and Cap turned to a man in a flowing cape holding a large hammer. 

“Thor, you gotta try and bottleneck that portal. Slow them down. You got the lightning. Light the bastards up.”

The man called Thor followed in the same fashion as Barton and Stark, and Cap turned to a woman with bright red hair. 

“You and me, we stay here on the ground. We keep the fighting here. And Hulk?”

The giant green man turned toward him with a snarl. 

“Smash.”

And finally off the last team member went, a deafening roar echoing down the street as he threw aliens left and right. 

“That’s… all well and good,” Steven said.

“But?” Jake asked. 

“Well he never told anyone what to do about Loki, or the portal, did he? What’s the use of fighting the aliens if more of them are just going to keep coming through that rip in the sky?” Steven said. 

Once again, Marc had to admit he had a point. Even as he looked up now he could see more and more aliens pouring through the hole, like blood from a fresh wound. Two more of the Leviathans had swam through the sky now, and he was sure that given enough time, there would be far more than that soon. 

“Looks like we’ve figured out what we’re doing,” Marc said, and Steven let the Mr. Knight mask form around their face again. 

“Be wary, now,” Khonshu warned as Steven popped the cap off the end of his truncheon, revealing the grappling hook inside. “Loki is no easy opponent. He is not a god that will show mercy to a mortal. Do not let your guard down.”

“Believe it or not, I’ve met an arsehole god before,” Steven muttered. “I see one every night.”

Steven pointed his truncheon at a building and launched up into the sky before Khonshu could respond. Still, Marc found he didn’t mind it. Old bird needed to be taken down a peg, as Steven always said. 

“Alright you bastard, where the hell are you?” Marc said, shifting suits to use his glider, and scanning the air for any trace of golden horns. Light flashed on the edge of his vision and he turned to see that Thor was completing his task, throwing long bolts of lightning at the portal. And heading straight for him was a blur of green and gold. “There you are. Steven, since you’re apparently the alien-fighting-expert, how do you want to hit him?”

Steven formed a silent plan, relaying it to Marc and Jake in their mind. 

“Jesus, Steven, and you tell me I’m gonna get us killed,” Marc muttered. “This shit better work.”

Marc glided over Stark Tower and began a slow spiral down, circling the portal beam and keeping an eye on Loki, who was getting closer and closer to Thor, and consequently, closer to Stark Tower. 

“You can’t miss this shot, Steven,” Jake said. “Me and Marc can get us into position but if you--”

“He can do it, Jake. Let him concentrate,” Marc said. He could feel Steven thinking hard, and his eyes were starting to hurt from how hard they were staring at the green and gold blur that was Loki. 

Almost…

They could see Loki’s face now. 

Almost…

His lips were pulled into a snarl, strikingly blue eyes seeming to glow against his pale skin. 

Almost…

He swerved by the tower just as they circled towards him. 

“NOW!” Steven shouted. He shifted into his Mr. Knight suit and pointed the end of his truncheon at Loki’s back. The grappling hook shot out as they began to fall, and dug deep into Asgardian armor and cloth. Steven pulled hard, turning over in the air as he yanked Loki off of his Chitauri craft. Loki cried out in surprise as Steven grabbed him by his chestplate and slammed his back into the roof of Stark Tower, landing on top of the god with a snarl. 

“Gotcha.”

Loki stared at them for a moment, his helmet having fallen off and his hair swaying from the portal’s energy beside them, before his bright blue eyes flicked up to the crescent on Steven’s mask. 

“Ah,” he breathed, his lips turning up unto a grin. “Khonshu. I take it this is your latest ‘Fist of Vengeance’?”

“Loki, you must cease this foolishness at once!” Khonshu said, appearing at their side. “Your reckless actions will send this entire planet into disarray!”

“You say that like it’s such a bad thing,” Loki said, and for the first time, it seemed someone other than the moon system could see the giant god standing next to them. Loki tilted his head in mock confusion and tapped his chin. “Yet I seem to remember that you’ve always liked a bit of discord. What was it that you always used to say?”

Loki suddenly yanked Steven forward and whispered in his ear. 

“Ah yes. Embrace the chaos!”

And before they could react Loki kicked them off, sending Steven scrambling to regain his footing, but it was too late. Loki was already on his feet, a large golden scepter materializing in his hand. 

He touched the point to their heart, and a haze of blue filled their vision.

~~~

“Hello, and welcome to Staying Awake.”

What? What is the meaning of this?

“Meet my friend, Jake Lockley.”

Is this who you are?

“It’s Steven, actually, I am… Steven.”

No, no that doesn’t make sense.

Tick tock, Marc Spector. Tick, tock.

Marc Spector?

I serve Khonshu. I’m his avatar. Which means you are too.

No, no this isn’t what’s supposed to happen. 

Surrender the body to Marc. 

No, NO! He is mine now! He’s supposed to stand down, supposed to kneel to ME!

Do you want to know the truth?

Why am I here? Where am I? I’m not supposed to be here, this isn’t how it works.

There’s chaos in you. 

I am chaos.

Your mind, I can feel it. 

No, no I forbid it. 

Fractured. 

Stop--

Broken.

No, no it’s not, I am a King, I’m--

What a waste. 

…Father?

You were always jealous of him. 

What? Of Thor? What is happening?

Ever since he was born. 

Because YOU favored him! Always, since we were children!

I should’ve known you’d do something like this. 

Of course you think I did this because of him, because it’s always��about him! It’s always your precious Thor!

You’re about to lose everything. 

I never had it.

Do you understand?

No, no this is all wrong, none of this makes sense. Who are you?

You want to remember the truth?

That I had a father that ignored me? That hated me?

That made your life a living hell?

You’re just trying to upset me.

You’re gonna learn to listen.

Stop it. 

Why do you have to make me do this?

Stop, stop this, father, please--

You disgusting human.

STOP, STOP THIS PLEASE!

It’s maddening, isn’t it?

Who are you?!

The voice in your head. 

His voice in my head. 

Relentless, forever unsatisfied. 

He could never have a Frost Giant sitting on the throne of Asgard.

No matter how hard you try to please…

Am I just the monster parents tell their children about at night?

…it devours you, until there’s nothing left but a hollow shell.

…I am going to die here, aren’t I?

You’re not gonna die. 

What?

Let me save us.  

…Alright.

~~~

Coming out of the hazy blue felt like finally taking a breath after too long underwater. The world was too bright, too colorful for their eyes now, it made Marc want to squeeze his eyes shut and put his head between his knees. All the sounds of the world were muffled and loud at the same time, ringing in their ears and hammering at the inside of their skull, but completely unintelligible. 

“…up! Get…!” Khonshu’s cold voice said somewhere between a mile away and right in their ear. 

“Fuck off,” Jake groaned. 

“What is…? No, no I didn’t want this.” Marc forced his eyes to stay open as he looked up at Loki, who was staggering to his feet and staring at the city around him, scepter forgotten on the ground. 

“Loki?” Marc said, slowly standing up. Loki whirled around, but looking at his face now, Marc could swear this was a different man than the one they’d been fighting.

There was a horrified and confused expression on Loki’s face, all malice and confidence wiped away. His hands were shaking and there was a fine sheen of sweat on his face, as if he were sick. 

But the biggest difference was his eyes.  

Not only had they lost their reckless courage, but they were no longer a bright, icy blue. They were green, soft and playful even as confusion and fear overpowered them. 

This wasn’t the man they fought, but it was the man in the blue haze of their mind just moments ago. 

“W-Who are you?!” Loki shouted over the roar of the portal. His hands gripped the railing on the roof so hard his pale knuckles somehow grew whiter. “You’re not the man I fought!”

“Listen, I know you’re confused, but we don’t have time for that right now!” Marc said. He pointed to the machine creating the portal and the glowing blue cube inside it. “Tell me how to shut down this portal!”

Loki looked at the machine, then up at the portal in the sky, and shook his head. 

“We can’t shut it down now, the Chitauri will still be headed for Midgard even without a portal to aid them. It will only delay the inevitable--we need to destroy their ship!”

“How the hell are we supposed to do that!?”

Loki looked apprehensively at the scepter still laying at their feet. Marc sighed and picked it up, handing it over to him. He didn’t much like the idea of handing over the weapon that just threw his brain into the blender, but it’s not like he knew how to use it either. 

Loki took it with an acknowledging nod, then stepped next to the machine so the portal was directly overhead. Within a moment the scepter started to make a loud whirring sound, its gem glowing brighter and brighter every second.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to destroy the ship and close the portal!” Loki shouted, his teeth gritted and straining from the power of the scepter. “So once I destroy the ship, you need to take the scepter and plunge it into the heart of this machine! Do it before the blast makes it to the portal!”

He gasped and stumbled as the gem’s power grew, and Marc caught him by the shoulders, barely keeping him from hitting the ground. The gem was starting to glow yellow in its core now, like a fire swallowed by cold ice. 

“That will close the portal?!” Marc said. 

“Yes!” Loki barely got the word out before he hissed in pain again, but his eyes were full of determination, and he straightened up again, standing on his own two feet without Marc’s help. 

Loki roared as a bright beam of yellow light burst from the scepter’s gem, shooting up into the sky and through the portal, and he held it long enough for an explosion of fire and light to be seen from below. 

Around them Marc saw aliens begin to fall, dropping from buildings and their crafts crashing to the ground. Without their ship to lead them, the hivemind army fell from the sky. The Chitauri were dead. 

Loki had saved the world.

Loki himself went limp a moment later, dropping the scepter and leaving Marc to catch him before he fell. He was pale, but his chest still rose and fell with labored breaths. 

Alive, but spent. 

Marc quickly laid him down and took up the scepter, not even checking to see if debris from the Chitauri ship had begun to fall. He plunged it right into the crown of the portal, below the glowing cube, struggling against its power. After a few, agonizing moments, the end of the scepter finally reached the heart and the machine shut down with a creaking moan. 

The portal closed, and the sky was clear, as if nothing had ever been there in the first place.

Marc dropped the scepter and leaned on his knees, gasping for breath and squeezing his eyes shut at the headache forming behind his eyes. 

“Thank you.”

Marc opened his eyes to see Loki standing again. Leaning heavily against the railing of the roof, but still standing.

“I’m uh… I’m Marc,” Marc said, straightening up. “Or Moon Knight. But I guess you’ve already heard my real name so it’s not worth keeping secret anymore.” He let his mask and hood fall away so Loki could see their face. “This isn’t going to make a lot of sense, but I kind of… share a body with the guy you fought.”

Steven returned to the front, and with him his Mr. Knight suit. Recognition dawned on Loki’s face as Steven gave him a wave. 

“Hiya,” he said. “I’m Steven, or Mr. Knight. We also have a third here.”

Jake fronted along with his black suit. 

“Hola,” he said. “Just call me Jake. I don’t have a fancy name like the other two.”

Loki didn’t seem to have it in him to answer. He gave a minute nod and ran a shaky hand through his hair, his eyes flicking back to the city ruins below them. 

“I…I don’t understand,” Loki said, apparently talking more to himself than to anyone else. “Why did I do this? I never wanted to hurt--I never wanted to do any of this.”

“I believe I may have an explanation,” Khonshu said suddenly, causing both men to jump. He pointed his staff in the direction of Loki’s fallen scepter. “That staff holds an incredibly powerful gem, it’s magic unlike any other in this universe.”

“The Mind Stone,” Loki said softly. 

“Yes,” Khonshu replied. “However, it has been altered. That blue gem is not its natural state, and I believe it was corrupting you, Loki. The longer you wielded that staff, the more it infected your mind, filling it with desires that were not your own.”

“He… He tricked me,” Loki said. His green eyes started to fill with tears as he gazed down at the desolation around them. “It was all a lie.” 

He slumped down, sitting with his back to the railing, and put his head in his trembling hands. 

Jake stepped forward and sat down next to Loki with a sigh. 

“You alright?” he asked. Loki gave a mirthless laugh and wiped his eyes. 

“I have a migraine,” he muttered. 

“Yeah, we’re gettin’ one too,” Jake said, rubbing their head. “That gem thing really scrambles your mind, huh?”

“It’s supposed to,” Loki said. “But I think with the condition of your mind, it didn’t work properly. You were supposed to be hypnotized, made to follow my command. But with so many of you sharing one heart, it couldn’t choose just one to control. So it grabbed a bit of everybody. Including me, apparently.”

“Huh,” Jake said. “Guess so. I dunno anything ‘bout this magic stuff. That’s more Steven’s thing.”

“Ah.” Loki looked up at them with a calculating stare, scanning over their face as if looking for the other two alters hidden behind Jake’s eyes. “Are you cursed?”

Jake barked a laugh that made Loki start, but soon he too grinned and chuckled at his own words. 

“Sorry, that may have been a bit forward,” Loki said. 

“No, it’s a fair question, what with all the magic and weird shit happening all the time,” Jake said. “But no, we’re not. Sometimes it feels like we are, but we’ve learned to work together, so it’s not as bad as it used to be.”

Loki nodded and laced his fingers together, looking at them thoughtfully. 

“That… wasn’t my father I was speaking to in your mind, was it?” he said. 

Jake stiffened, and Steven took over the front, gasping a little at the stab of pain in their head as they made the switch. Loki looked up at them in concern, but Steven waved him off. 

“It’s alright,” he said. “Jake just doesn’t like to talk about those things. And no, it wasn’t. It was kind of a lot of people really. Those were our memories.”

“Your memories? Even the--” Loki cut off, unwilling to repeat the words he’d heard in their mind. But Steven didn’t need him to. 

“The ‘disgusting human’ bit?” Steven said, offering a sad smile. Loki nodded. “Yeah. That would be our dear old mum.”

Loki didn’t answer to this, only looking back down at his laced fingers with a sorrowful gaze. 

“So erm,” Steven went on, “Would I be right in saying you probably didn’t exactly have the best father ever?”

Loki scoffed and his jaw tightened. 

“Not according to the whole kingdom,” he muttered. “If we asked them, they’d say he was the greatest man to ever exist, a hero to all the realms, and any son of his should be proud to call him ‘father’.”

“Oh,” Steven said. “And if we asked you?”

“I’d say that I wonder how much happier I would’ve been if I wasn’t stolen from the world of my birth, and had grown up with a father who actually loved me.”

Loki sighed and more tears sprang to his eyes as he returned his gaze to the city. 

“But I can’t even begin to imagine that,” he said softly. “My father… he’s part of me. He shaped me to be king, a ruler. He taught me to constantly strive for his approval, but he held it just out of reach. He’s part of who I am, and I who I am is a monster.”

He turned and looked into Steven’s eyes. 

“How can I ever be anything more than what I was made to be?”

Steven looked at him for a moment before looking down at their suit. 

“I think you should take this one Marc.”

Marc obliged, and shifted to the front, the Mr. Knight suit fading away to form his Moon Knight suit. 

He looked back up at Loki, and put his hand on his shoulder. 

“Time,” he said simply. “Time and a little help.”

“That’s it?” Loki said, raising an eyebrow. 

“Easier said than done,” Marc said. “I know how you feel right now. It’s how I felt a few months ago, before I moved here. 

“I’ve hurt a lot of people in my life. I grew up with a mother like your father. A mother that hated me, that made my life a living hell, that convinced me all I could ever be was someone that hurt people. So that’s what I did, for a real long time. And even when I tried to stop, I still hurt people. I hurt my friends. I hurt my wife. I hurt the people that lived in my own mind. But worst of all, I hurt myself. 

“I hurt myself by believing what my mother told me. By thinking that all I could ever be was a killer, and a monster. By believing that every bad thing I ever did and every bad thing that ever happened to me was an inevitable consequence of being born. 

“I hurt myself by believing that all I could be was what my mother told me I was. A disgusting human. A killer. A monster.”

Loki looked up into his eyes at the last word, and Marc hoped the expression on his face mirrored the empathy he felt. 

“After I let people in though, I started to get better,” he said. “I let Steven help me. I let my wife take care of me. I let Jake protect me. I let myself find love and family again. It was hard, and it hurt like hell, and it felt so fucking wrong the whole time, but in the end I am so much happier than I’ve ever been in my life.

“And yeah, sometimes I still believe what my mom told me. I still believe I’m a monster, that I’m a killer, that I’m a disgusting human who’s unworthy of the love my family has for me. But I’ve learned that when I feel that way, I don’t have to run away and save myself from pain anymore. I can go to the people I love, and let them love me back.”

Marc glanced down at the movement in the corner of his eye, and smiled when he saw Thor walking on the balcony of Stark Tower just a few feet below them. He was pacing around, looking in each broken window and tapping his hammer nervously with his fingers. 

“And it looks like someone who loves you is looking for you right now,” Marc said.

Loki looked down and gazed at Thor, a wishful and scared glint in the green of his eyes. 

“What if--”

“You’ll never know until you try,” Marc said. Loki pressed his lips together and nodded. 

“Thank you,” he whispered. 

“Anytime.”

Together they climbed down the tower and dropped onto the balcony, and Marc let the mask and hood form over their face again before Thor saw them. 

But he didn’t need to, because the only person Thor seemed to see was his brother. He didn’t hesitate for even a second before dropping his hammer and running to Loki, throwing strong arms around his brother and holding him tight. 

Marc smiled at them, before leaping off the tower and spreading his cape, gliding back down to the streets of New York City. 

Thank you so much for reading! Let me know what you thought of this story, I'd love to hear your opinions!

[kindtobechurlish]

You think me getting what I got, as nicer would be personified by brand, is blessing, and not wisdom that shows you should get wisdom before you get gold and silver. You think, that’s why Rockefeller didn’t want you thinking but working! The money is fiat, and before you get a job you have to show your SS card as they with Green Card and Visa can work just like you, and perhaps be better than you. Immigration makes you money, and the immigrants are not sojourners least there be collapse? These kulaks are blood suckers, now blood suckers would accuse Kikes of what they are guilty of. Imagine something that is both to the larger and lesser degree. What? You like fractions? How do you like it when everything is added minus touch, and the left over is touch? “Touch me.” What is me speaking, and the speech amounts to you warding me off or being attracted? Evil eye would be, and women are giving me evil eye just to think I want to be with them. They just expose abuse and the act of not being wise. My sentence would personify life, and now you can see these people who don’t do right by me (headless) and it’s all because of the demon called envy. Imagine it, “did you watch the video?” Evil in nature would describe itself, and now you see that grandpa who makes you feel special, “I don’t want people to know this information”, and you are there! Idiots think they know better than me, but I got wisdom. Fuck Jimmy Dean and his sausage, fuck his 50 million dollar estate. Mummy? Now, I ask, are you Jimmy? What is the highway of the upright, and the difference between a highwayman and “Cartouche?” Some soothsayer thinks he is pacifying me, just for me to expose he needs stripes! A fat Nazi? I’m ready to strap you to pole and put a scorpion to your ear. It’s like me poking the WHITE of thy eye! Some fat neo-Nazi! Do you have hypothermia, because the scum of pharaoh’s brain would expose Albert Pike. What DOG HAIR!!!

People get “scared” when I made, essentially, Ra my pet and by the pet I am beheading apep. Apep was said to come from the umbilical cord of Ra, and it’s a serpent that the Greeks translated to Python! I would say people are coming to New York State, by their mother land, and I need to cut the cord! Ancient Egypt can conquer where they come from by the called taweret and the gods called anubis, what happens in demoralization, the god called osiris, so now you understand umbilical cord and “nation” that isn’t greater than the personification of serekh and cartouche. The highwayman would be personified by card, and government has deployed its “policy enforcers” (police). Now, people would see the god called Apollo, just to ponder theater and immigration that amounts to invaders. You would see a woman I can run to, and now I am personifying fear and being in a land not yours. You are with a negro? Who is fleeing NY? I would personify chaff, a grandma that isn’t nothing, and the little boy wants me to mirror him. Little boy! The little boy is calling me bad/evil when I want to eat pussy, and as I am eating pussy the woman calls “grandma” just to go back to the other one last time to not touch him after she gave herself away, as I am oppressed. Mirror me and understand being put to death in law, my past anger, JOHNNY’S BOON! “I can make my own decisions”, and the old me would pitch a fit verses get in that pussy, have this dick molded in that ass as she is on her belly, on the phone, acting like she is “for good.” What is a trap as I am desperate? My cynicism would expose that sex with me isn’t ease and pleasure, and you don’t know what happened of Praxiona. Ragtime would expose language and hair, and now you can understand that suit and a people I don’t want to be! “What a collectivization”, fuck yea! I know who, what, I don’t want to be like. By the LORD’s Release, seven years, can you understand evil eye, and by slaves you can understand seven years, women, and material that doesn’t amount to shelter. What is benevolence? Shelter would personify a cover, and I would go out my way to personify blackmail because I am not a slave. Now, silence is as Egypt is Egypt. What is a Cleopatra Needle, and a sacred carving that amounts to abominations?! My God would be my light, my sun, and by nature can you see people make my guardians into gods! Gods being taken away would melt the heart, like fire to the flame, and now you see the yoke! My heart longs for the God of Jeshurun, for I do not worship nature! Zero point would show why I am as I am, who I am better than, and now you see people resisting me and I am getting juice from them. How does it feel to be an idiot if you are private or not? Now, they want to join the military? When you understand a ball sucker, a woman who needs demoralization to feel better about what she does (as it isn’t about love), you can come to see the opportunist who would submit themselves to the bourgeoisie who just SITS! Have you ever seen a sedentary proletariat? Is that ok? What is blackmail, and a people who want to sit on a log with negro’s who do race betrayal? To personify Saturn and Jupiter’s seat by faggots on fire, s’mores, and the log. I would see their “clan rally” just to make it about Ancient Egypt and Great House, now I would personify hands just to too personify a shotgun to the head and lack of money! Is it funny? People you thought were tough as Neo-Nazi’s, are now stripped naked. “This isn’t Boy Scouts”, hell na, you need the money!!!

I’d go back to zero point, where the x,y, has no dots or lines that cuts lines that personify the graph, and now you can understand my guardians and my separation from that coon. The coon would want to be White, or be, as that suit is, and I don’t want to be that coon. I have seen tawny get in pictures with foreign officials with flip flops, and they call themselves government officials. Coons would not amount to the tawny I just spoke of, so why is that Darky wearing a suit after he gets information? “Money, stigma”, what is a coon shouter and blackface performer? The wadjet eye personifies the five senses, so in the LORD’s Release can you understand Evil Eye. What is hasting to be rich, and a raccoon that doesn’t amount to a pirate? Go take someone hostage and get booty, just for the government to prove to be incompetent, YOU PIRATE. And now you understand Ernest Hogan mutilating corpses in his death, by race betrayal! A stereotype would be made, “anyone with blue gums don’t work”, and now Jim Crow, Jim Cuff, Uncle Joe, is making the mould as a den of jackals personified itself by ragtime and law that amounted to lynching. Ragtime and guns? I would give you a picture, just for you to know a slave had gun rights if his master let it - and a dog tag was a dog tag. Now, the military would be, and by unclean laws, the wise guy, you see slavery is about food, water, and clothing, not shelter, just for you to consider a “hut.” What is a TP? People would see animal hide has been replaced by toilet paper, and now people doubt communist due to energy and toilet paper. Bernie Sanders would be all for criminal reform and a mixed police that caters to the Negro and his safety, as I would expose AOC and her attack against the Kulak. She would be all for unions, and the union puts a company under yoke and now pouring coffee has what was made for steam mills, warehouses, education, and construction workers. You would see reform, and it’s means to bring in communism. Some latinx woman and kike with agenda, and Joe Biden’s life support is Kamala Harris. When you understand my action, and an act that isn’t going to help you right now least you be blemished or elderly, you can understand a Fuckface selling you out just to hide it by “cut.” What are you waiting for? The Kulak, the bourgeoisie, and politicians are all standing together, they only yearn cuts as they are subservient to Kikes. I would know senses, and by it I can separate myself from pan-Africanist just for the nation to be personified by catering to issue and separation, flowers coming upon a woman and expiring, soap/oil that amounts to “wash me with hyssop.” I would have a nation that personifies itself by action, and in action.. theater would personify hygiene, as psalms would personify serving God and waiting for him as water is water. Water would personify clean and unclean, and by the broken and contrite heart would you see a holy nation. The act of making people look smart would personify my genius, and now some sponge is claiming himself as “first” as no King of Yisrael/Judah, or pharaoh, personified himself by two, five, ten video’s and a brothel that does nothing but expose the god called taweret and the god called anubis - as my God would “take away” the gods! Apep would be chaos, and by chaos do people resist chaos. I am now exposing OATH TO THE DOG!

You would notice geographic, skin, nose, lips, and now a collection would expose Stalinism. What is needed for advancement, least go under? The Fugees, “ready or not, here I come, you can’t hide”, made Haitians look better to the masses, before them people thought that Haitians were filth and good for nothing. So, in the stigma I would too show to the wrong woman “dog” is filthy. “You dog”, and it doesn’t amount to Alexander the Great, but hoodlum.. I would know market, economy, and by scripture that has to be seen by the keen eye, with science (know), I can know the carpenter while too knowing the builder as blueprint is blueprint. The cancel of debt would be, the oath to the dog would be, and now fiat money is being converted to coin as digital records is digital records - and they would apply to whole sale and the rounding of whole sale! A backing of silver would be by gold and opium, and by women’s health (hygiene) comes a flow of currency as the “backed silver” and “gold” is means to give out loan and personify the oath to the dog and the LORD’s Release. Don’t you detest evil eye, and you are supposed to be in the land by law that establishes a sponge and first? I would have to divide myself from Pan-Africanism, and now you are ready to show evil eye to the beggar who won’t find a way to pick up percussion instrument and change the beg to a charming of vipers. People would be as vipers, closing ear to good reason to where they need charmers. The poison would be wine, and they are ready to bite just so their “bite” would personify the RUNAWAY! Greek Culture would expose the barbarian, and in my God can you see wisdom (she calls from the city square and street corners). Corpulent ultimately is body, and hygiene amounts to healthy. You would have stigma, stereotypes, and a geographic can make you give evil eye just in senses being senses. You would see a people, and their features would describe the geographic they are from, and now because of intelligence (or lack thereof) you see a person and are ready to give evil eye. You are ready to see them, and form stereotypes, just to ultimately make things about money. The geographic would expose a people who who can “pay you back”, and the phrase would have ultimate levels. The ultimate levels amount to someone being able to hit you back, or give you a return that enables your bank. “Pay back” is just that, pay back, and now you see what amounts to what. “Pay it forward.” What!?

“Instant relief”, you squatting? So now, the lumpish would not be able to squat, as a “carpenter” would consider women and give a step for the toilet. Now, the soles are elevated, and it isn’t Donald Trump’s head but an old man sitting on a throne. You would see the picture of squatting, a potty, just to see these peoples who eat up shit from these politicians who enable the sedentary bourgeois. Donald Trump. Imagine Neo-Nazi’s wanting Donald Trump. He is a sedentary bourgeois who plays golf 😂. The sedentary bourgeois would see my enablement, and not care until he sees he can be condemned. The sedentary bourgeois would sit his seat, just to show he isn’t a scholar. His scholarship amounts to his business, and all he does is look to keep doors open as he/she is yoked by sin! The sedentary bourgeois sits his seat, and hears information just to be ready to write/sell books! The people buying his book would look to be just like him, verses sharing wisdom. “I am not utilizing social media to share information, you have to pay me”, WHAT!? So now, you are writing books, as you are damn near Mussolini on social media with your short scoundrel “signs?” You have lost your mind! Do you delight in wisdom? Now, you see Donald Trump just to be amazed in the revelation, Donald Trump was sending “mean tweets” and now he wants to be like the 10 Plagues of Egypt that manifested the 10 Commandments - you haven’t seen a Donald Trump on Twitter before or after him (he wants it to stay this way) - you haven’t seen the plagues of Egypt as they were in Egypt before or after them. “I’m the best tweeter.” I would personify my God, “my people”, just to know the carpenter who could start “giving out” steps for the toilet and they do nothing but personify a blueprint.. and a blueprint is not a book, a blueprint is not from a bluegum. I would not be a Brillo Pad Bluegum talking hot air, Saturn, just reminiscing on the past, FACTS, as people would see gums that are not pink and that is the STIGMA. “You are making people against you look smart”, I have to, because I am not White. If I just went out and looked to make people look stupid, I would go mad and lose myself! “ I’m WHYTE”, and banana’s dance. I am utilizing the action of making my enemies look extremely smart, just to be able to personify a false pretense! I am not that negro with Greek foot saying, “I can be gay”, and I am not a Black Brute saying, “I fuck man bootyhole”, but rather I am personify my hands, and now you can understand the god called Ptah. Metal would show prominence, and now you can understand a train ride as well as population control! Imagine people working to their death, they do the work and are put in a pit, and imagine incompetent people telling me to get with an idiot who can’t fathom I will be the same in money and there isn’t anymore I need to do (people are not that smart, and now I’m personifying idiot just to expose Jimmy Dean). A geographic would be, and people even see White Trash as gods/goddesses, as wedjet eye is the senses. “We are called spicks”, and you are doing nothing about the rat problem in NY. Crisis? So much for SPICK AND SPAN! Ra would cut the head of apep, and his head was said to be made of flint. Do you understand a fire, and a car!?

Look at it.. the geographic would condemn the individual, and the Kulak only considers himself. So, what is me doing race betrayal just to wash myself with the finest soaps, douse myself with the most plush of oils? The stigma would be a stigma, and the continent of Africa would be just that. Oppression would make me personify “wash me”, and now I would have incenses burning on high hills and high places, just for the wind, East wind, to personify itself. Rule would come about, and with products for women a soap would be personified by myrrh and frankincense, and now the Egyptians added and added on to their rituals - I would personify stigma change by culture! Stigma would be, and I would make Egyptology just to not be Ernest Hogan, and by the oath to the dog you can see the sorceress and the boon produced by the god called eros. People would hear of law, and they are ignorant of it! The woman I can run to, if I just got mad and got angry, enabling someone to say my panties are in a knot, I could still get her! Now, you see the woman I can run to, and the dog shaven butt face - I can pitch a fit to the woman I can run to.. as others without hair on the face can pitch a fit and get away with it. They have three strikes if there is a superior that gets offended. Is the Thalia mask you standing like a little boy, with both hands in the pocket? “You have to add a weird smile too, Kevin”, oh ok, that wolf. Dog shaven butt face would pitch a fit, and put both hands in the pocket to show that he isn’t going to hurt anyone with hands.. and because the wolf is “cutthroat” you have the contrast of BLACK BRUTE - by “idiot” you see what’s coming! The wolf puts on his sheep’s clothing and is a lie, he stands with Kikes because of Hitler and Yacob conning/stealing Esau’s birthright and blessing! What is a fraud? You would see a people mesh with a fraud, and I am personifying I am not a Bounty Bar (a joke for the Queen) - by “Egypt is my people” the sock and boot (buskins) would show advancement in “theater” as infamia is infamia. I would know what a person is, who people are, and by action you see people’s act’s that is only a mask. To comfort the mask, I would have dialect and vocabulary that personifies my cynicism - and now people act like they do for the greater good! How long must you act as a god/goddess, to try to convey that you are for good!? “Kevin, you have been performing”, I know. My mama doesn’t know this me. Now people are ready to worship the LORD’s Glory, the sun.