#BOY JALTER IS GOING TO KICK YOUR ASS

[liedream]

     Hey, if the four of us band together could we punch the shit out of Beryl or am I delusional from waking up a bit ago?

[brilliantpride]

"yako, my buddy, my pal!" ritsu slaps her back in a cameradic manner. "i was thinkin', you've been getting more experience as a master. and i did already do this whole luluhawa thing last year. it just wouldn't be fair for me to basically give jalt all the cheat codes, y'know? so i'll let you be her circle member this go-round as a learning experience." it's a learning experience! absolutely.

ritsu... somehow already managed to pull strings, call favours, and enact bribes enough to end up with their own hotel room? not even reliant on jalter and blackbeard for somewhere to sleep! and therefore, able to make a clean break as they gesture the swimsuit-clad jalter over to yako with a "she'll be helping you this time, yako's real good at stories!", grab robin, and absolutely just disappear.

see ya later, yakoyan! good luck! don't stay up too late! all that stuff! ritsu's taking the chance to take it easy and enjoy a free three-month vacation, aware of the loops thanks to master status and absolutely refusing to do a thing to speed them up whatsoever. jalter has yako's shoulder in a vice grip. have fun with that!

Luluhawa, Week 1, Day 1.

All right, Luluhawa rerun! Yako cheers as they appear at the airport, just like last year! Ocean air, roaring waves, and an awesome landscape! Time to sit back, relax, adventure across the landscape with the free week they have when Ritsu tells Jeanne Alter exactly how to get out of this thing and conscripts Osakabe to help her so neither of them have to work on typesetting, inking, all that fun stuff...

...right?

... ... ...Ritsu?!

Learning experience, her ass! What does this have to do with being a Master?! "Why wouldn't it be fair?! I was gonna teach the boys how to surf! You can just tell her how to win by—"

A-bap-bap! Ritsu's already got an arm around her shoulders, jerking her out of her sentence. No cheating! They hand her off to Jalter, who grabs her shoulder with a vice-grip and a look of sheer disappointment. Well sorry she's not Ritsu! Ack, and they're taking Robin with them this time, too! Who's going to help with the whole scheduling thing?! Wait! Wait—!

—

Luluhawa, Week 1, Day 7.

Yako stretches out on the floor of the apartment, evading the sensory overload of con, as BB hovers ominously over her. Ahh, it's everyone's favorite kouhai. Yeah, yeah, she knows she super failed this loop, so it's time to get turned into a pig, right? Yeah, yep, she knows how this goes. She's submitting to her fate. Yako waves a hand dismissively. "Just get it over with... I'm so tired..."

Kama glances up from the bed. If Yako glanced up, she'd catch a glimpse of two powerful wills clashing... BB puts a hand on her chin.

"Well, do your best this next loop or my viewers won't have anything fun to watch, and I'll be forced to turn it into a psychological horror, okay? Hehe, turning you into a pig wouldn't be enough for the kind of viewership I'm looking for this time around. I could turn your Sabers into cute little Demon Pillars and watch you have to... oooo~ps, no spoilers. You'll find out when you fail, won't you? ♥"

BB giggles, disappearing with sparkles and static.

...And then there were two.

"When I fail, she says."

"Mhum," Kama shrugs.

Yako scrapes herself off the floor. "That bitch! I'll show her! I'll write the best fucking adventure manga this world's ever fucking seen!"

"Good for you." Kama sinks back onto the bed, flipping through pages of adult material. Yako crosses her arms, leaning her head back.

"And you're gonna help me this time."

"No way."

"I'll burn a Command Seal if I have to, asshole."

"Do it and I'll [REDACTED] your [REDACTED] so hard you won't be able to walk for two loops."

Grrrrgh.

It's time to bring out the ultimate weapon:

"...Please? It would make me really happy..."

Emotional sincerity.

Kama sighs.

"...Two hours, three days a week. That's all you get from me."

"Hell yes! We'll kick Medb's ass for sure this time!" Yako pumps a fist into the air. "And then BB's! And then Ritsu's! Oh, they are so dead when I find them!"