#Azris fic
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Hello, hope you’re doing well I just wanted to thank you for curing my disability. You’re probably wondering what the fuck, let me explain.
I’m really dyslexic and I only really learned how to read in the sixth grade and it’s still mostly impossible for me to write a grammatically correct sentence. My dream as a kid was to one day read a big chapter book, once I got to high school I could read, in fact I was a very good reader, but I believed that I couldn’t read. Years of people telling me that I’m stupid and that I will never be able to had rubbed off on me. So I experienced the medium of literature through audiobooks. The night of New Year’s last year I stayed up till 2 AM in my tired and delirious state I went on Ao3 thinking it would be funny if I tried reading about an acotar crack ship. I didn’t like any of them, but I was determined to find something I found decent. And that is when I found the fic that for the longest time I pronounced as Kratos, for some reason ( now I know how to say it ) Kerosene. It was then that I did something I thought impossible, I read for three straight days. Anyway I love reading and you helped me realize that.
I don’t know how to express how much I love this medium, and that you were a big part in helping me realize how beautiful words on a page can be, not just hearing them read to me, but actually reading and experiencing what the characters are going through. As silly as it sounds your fanfiction about gay fairies going on a Brokeback mountain adventure to defeat an evil Lord and having a sex along the way change my life and my art.
I’ve been meaning to write this to you since I found out who you were, but I didn’t wanna be vulnerable on the Internet, or with a stranger but I’m past that immaturity so, here you go. Thank you.
IM SORRY?!? Excuuuuuse me? WHAT? BRB, sobbing on a Monday.
I think I’ve read this a million times and I cannot get over it. As soon as I figure out how to get this tattooed onto my soul I’ll let you know.
If you come off anon so I can hug you I promise to be nice. 😭😭😭
I’m so stupidly flattered but also so super fucking happy that you have found a way to enjoy reading!!! This is so beautiful and I’m so very happy for you.
As a pitiful thank you for making my whole year here is a silly Azris art WIP sneak peek
#gay faeries for the win#ILY anon#I’m never getting over this#I have eaten it so it’s a part of me now#azris#eris vanserra#azris supremacy#acotar#azriel x eris#azris fanfiction#acotar fanfiction#azriel shadowsinger#eris acotar#eris x azriel#azriel acotar#azris fanart#azriel#pro azris#azris fic#azris intensifies#azris angst#azris fluff#acotar fanfic#chunkyasks#anon ask
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Light of the Moon
Chapter 44
“Eris dropped, his leg kicking out and catching Azriel. His feet flew from under him, throwing him onto his back. The impact knocked the wind from him. He groaned rolling onto his side to relieve the pressure off his wings, couching in an attempt to catch his breath. “That wasn’t fair.”
Eris knelt in front of him, a grin plastered across his face. “Last I checked there were no rules.” He leaned forward, lifting Azriel’s chin and kissing him. “I’m from the Autumn Court Moon, we don’t play fair.”
Azriel sighed and laid back, watching Eris stand to get water. A grin spread across his face before he tripped Eris and caused him to fall beside him. Azriel could not help but laugh, Eris’ laughter beginning to mix with his. He turned his head to watch him, to see the joy painted across his mate’s face. It was a simple moment like this that made their love grow. Neither needed grand gestures of love, proclamations, or actions. All they needed was the small smiles, the short laughs, and intimate moments where the world that had beaten them down and attempted to break them melted away. It was their laugh that reminded Azriel that they made it through. Each time they were pushed past their breaking point they had made it through to these small moments.
Azriel turned to him, draping himself over Eris and kissing him. “I never said that I played fair either.”
Eris still chuckled against his lips, his hands resting on Azriel’s shoulders.”
Thank you so so much @capricule for the AMAZING art work. Honestly that doesn't even describe this. If you want a incredibly nice person, extremely talented, and over all hard working and enthusiastic person to do your art this is them!! I will definitely be going back next time I want a commissioned art piece!! As for now I just want to say thank you Capricule!!
I am so excited that this is finished. I couldn't be more happy with the finished artwork. Every bit of detail and the characters appearance was captured perfectly. I never thought they would end up being so close to how I envisioned them. All expectations were blown out of the water and I couldn't be happier.
Details:
If you have read Light of the Moon you may notice a few small things.
- Eris and Lucien’s bargain mark on Eris’ chest
- Eris’ traumatic past with Beron evident by the scars on his side/back
- Azriel and Eris’ mating ceremony ring on Azriel’s hand
- The few pieces of jewelry Eris had Azriel start wearing again
- The shoes only covering Eris’ feet due to…well I can't spoil that
I just can't express how thankful and thrilled I am with this art work.
Characters belong to Sarah J Maas
#azriel#azris#azris fanart#azris fanfiction#azris fic#azrisweek2024#eris vanserra#fanart#fanfic#fantasy#azris supremacy#pro azris#azriel shadowsinger#eris acotar#azriel x eris#azriel vanserra
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all and then most of you
Azriel x Eris
Word Count: 2.5k
Snippet: Azriel arrives like he always does—silently, in the dead of night, when the shadows are heaviest and time slows to a crawl.
Read on AO3
A/N: pls read the ao3 tags. I recommend not reading the spoilers but do what you gotta do. thank you to my beta @pippsmcgee who read this and said "you know what you should do next?" thus inspiring me to make this a two-part series. 😈 Stay tuned for the next installment lol (already written) Also this was my first time writing in present tense and it was so fun!
Tag list: @jules-writes-stories @mistandmemories @neciebee @talibunny30 @chunkypossum @molcat07 @iftheshoef1tz @fourteentrout @lovely-vanserra-sunshine
(Tagged people I think are interested PLEASE lmk if you want off/on the azris tag 😅)
#azris#azriel x eris#eris x azriel#azris fanfiction#azris supremacy#azris angst#pro azris#azris fic#eris vanserra#azriel#azriel shadowsinger#azriel acotar
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Temporary
Pairing: Azris
Summary: Just a cozy morning between secretly mated Azris... they're adorable. This takes place before the IC boys annual snowball fight. 🥰
Word count: 1.4k words
Warnings: Mention of sex, mention of oral sex, brooding, slight/almost IC "hate" (Eris is a hater, apologies. Tho he does not 😚)
A/N: Aaaah Azris, my heart. This is my first time writing a homosexual pairing, so, yay? Yay! Anyways! Tell me your thoughts, I'm really excited about sharing this one with yall. 💕 ALSO! Let December, the merriest month of the year (in my modest opinion), BEGIN!
If you want to see what Eris... jumper looks like in the fic below, click here!
Dividers made by @tsunami-of-tears ❤️
The sound of crackling fire doesn’t send ripples of raw terror down Azriel’s spine anymore. His hands don't start shaking at the mere sight of a flame, and it doesn’t make him recall the way the fire had licked the skin off his hands as his brothers laughed devilishly.
No, not anymore. Now, Azriel has found a way, someone, who makes him see the flames as other than fear and danger. Now, he can enjoy the warmth it provides him. He can even just watch how the flame dances in the fireplace and just relax. Enjoy. Admire its beauty…
And the person who managed to accomplish this Gods damn miracle is currently curled around Azriel’s pillow, their and Azriel's scent filling the room. It's a perfect combination of warm cider and cinnamon, with a hint of cloves mixed with Azriel’s night-chilled mist and cedar unique scent. The smell clings to the bedsheets, much to Azriel’s delight. It probably will stay that way for a few more days, hopefully. This scent, his mate's scent, his lover’s scent, Eris scent.
Warmth flooded Azriel’s chest, and he stills. The feeling of the bond in his chest still makes him unsteady. Hasn't quite gotten used to the way Eris feels through the bond, nor had he mastered to control the massive waves of emotions he sometimes sends down his mate's side.
The Illyrian steps closer to the bed, keeping his footsteps light and discreet. He sits down beside Eris' sleeping form, his eyes roaming over his utterly naked skin. The light coming from the fire burning in front of Azriel's bed dances over Eris’ freckled back, casting the most enticing shadows on his skin. Azriel sucks in a breath, Eris looks like a God. The Mother herself must envy the male, honestly.
Azriel, unlike Eris, is dressed and almost ready to leave the house. Today, Azriel has planned to leave his secluded flat and fight the frigid weather of the largest peak of Velaris mountains. Today, like every year since centuries, he would not only have to fight the cold and the wind, but also his brothers’ ruthlessness.
Azriel is anticipating his 200th snowball fight victory this year, and hopes to get it over with soon, so he can just crawl back in bed with his favorite redhead to claim his prize.
Fuck the birchin, he would most likely get kicked out anyway. Thoughts of Eris haunt his days and nights now, and the heat of the birchin would just remind him of the heat emitting from his mate’s body when his mouth parts open and Azriel is buried deep in-
“Az, this is an ungodly hour to have these kinds of thoughts,” Eris grumbles, rolling over to face Azriel. His amber eyes meets Azriel’s. “Hi.”
“Hi,” Azriel responds, his voice barely above a whisper. His scarred hand reaches down, and cradles Eris' cheek. “I didn’t want to wake you up.” His thumb traces the freckles on his cheekbone, the softness of Eris’ face makes Azriel shiver. Eris' lips twitch with amusement, his eyelids still heavy with sleep. And Cauldron boil and fry him, Azriel has to fight every instinct in order to keep his clothes on and not claim Eris' pretty mouth with his cock right here and then.
If Rhysand isn’t already growing suspicious of his spymaster's behavior, he would definitely suspect something is going on if Azriel fails to attend their traditional snowball fight without warning them. He can't allow Rhysand to start questioning him, because Eris would kill Azriel for that. Not quite literally, at least. But he would be greatly displeased.
It’s not that Eris wants to keep it a secret forever. No. Eris is a jealous, and quite possessive male. He truly wants nothing more than to make the world know that Azriel is his. Problem is, with his new High Lord position and Autumn closed-minded population, announcing it publicly could create chaos. Eris cannot allow that to happen. His Court is still weak, courtiers are constantly on a rotation, people are tense… A bad reaction to this news could quickly degenerate. Eris still has to build some trust and respect amongst his court, and change a few things up before publicly announcing his mating bond with a male. A male and an Illyrian.
Azriel gets Eris' point of view, and he respects this. Eris considers himself the luckiest male in Prythian for that. Just comprehension and respect, no questions, no pushing.
Though sometimes when Eris is away, he looks at the stars and moon and wonders if this was the right decision. He also wonders how much longer? How much longer until he can truly be free, until he can stop hiding? On darkest days, like when he has to stay away from Azriel for over a week or so because of his High Lord responsabilities, he wonders if Azriel will get bored of hiding. Wonders if he'll get tired of waiting, and end this, the special thing that they have. Eris’ most prized treasure. He wonders what, and if, and why…
A pinch on Eris' cheek snaps him out of his thoughts. “You’re scowling.”
Eris' nose scrunches and frowns. He hates that Azriel can so easily read him. He also hates that he makes Azriel worry, he wants to make him happy when they're together, not stressed or worried about him because he can't stop brooding. “Yeah, because that’s my jumper you’re wearing.” He lies easily. Azriel doesn't notice.
“Jumper?” Azriel looks down, pulling at the navy and dark orange fabric. “You call that a jumper?”
“What do you call it?”
Azriel chuckles and just shrugs. “I don’t know. Like, a sweater? A pullover?”
“That sounds like a cheap piece of clothing. A jumper is fancy.” Eris protests, pulling the sheets further up his body and crossing his arms.
“Yes, yes. Very fancy, my heart.” Azriel leans in, and pampers Eris' scowling face with kisses. Eris looks like a ruffled angry bird, which makes Azriel laugh once more. Before Eris can snap at him for making fun of him, Azriel leans down and nips at the tip of his nose before pulling away. “I have to go now.”
“With my jumper on?”
Azriel halts. He feels the heat creeping up his cheeks. He rolls his neck, trying to ease the unease that settled in the muscles there. “Uh, yeah. Is that… okay?”
Eris props himself up on his elbows and stares. Azriel has to force his eyes to stay focused on Eris’ face, else they will venture down to stare at the sheet dropping dangerously low to his waist. Eris bites his lip, his eyes still assessing Azriel. Eris looks at him up, then down, without any ounce of shame. After what feels like an eternity, Eris just shrugs. “Yeah. Let the ba…”
Azriel's stare hardens, giving Eris a warning. So Eris thinks before continuing what he was about to say, wisely choosing his words. Not without rolling his eyes first, he tries again. “Let your… friends, I guess, know that a delicious smelling person shares your life now. I don’t mind. Just… don’t tell them everything, please. Not now.”
Azriel nods, and before Eris can start to justify himself, he shuts him up by placing his lips on his. He kisses him slowly, savoring the few minutes he has left before he really has to go. When they break apart, reluctantly, Eris' cheeks are tinted with the prettiest shade of pink. “Will you still be there when I come back?” Azriel asks.
Eris chews his lip and runs his hand through his messy auburn curls. “Maybe. I don’t know. I have… stuff waiting for me in Autumn. So… I don't think so. I'll see.”
Azriel nods, though he would have prefered a more certain answer. Because what else can he do about that?
This– the bond–is still new for both of them, but Azriel would be lying if he said he wouldn’t love to have his mate here, in his small apartment, in his bed every day of his immortal life. But he understands. Plus, this is all just a temporary situation. At the moment, Eris has responsibilities, more than ever since he became High Lord. He has a court to rebuild and… hounds waiting for him to get back to them, spoil them and care for them.
Does Azriel feel a bit jealous of the hounds? No. Maybe? Just a little bit. “Alright,” He hesitates, then asks Eris, “Will you come back?”
No matter how many times Eris makes his way back to Azriel, the fear of losing him forever always lingers in the shadowsinger's head. So Azriel always asked, just to be sure, and Eris never questioned. He simply smiles fondly at him and speaks the truth like he always does. “Always.”
Taglist: @mybestfriendmademe @lilah-asteria @acotar-lover @paige0103
#acotar#fiction#my fic#eris vanserra#fluff#acotar fanfiction#a court of thorns and roses#azriel#azriel spymaster#azriel shadowsinger#azriel acotar#eris acotar#eris vanserra acotar#azris#azris supremacy#azris fanfiction#azris fic#pro azris#azris fluff#acotar fanfic#a court of thorns and roses fanfiction#a court of thorns and roses fanfic#acosaf#acowar#acosf#azriel acomaf#acofas#solstice#acotar solstice#azris solstice
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Just Enough Light to Cast Shadows
Azriel x Eris
Chapter 39/39 on AO3
Eris Vanserra learned three vital lessons early in life. The first was that magic often masqueraded as the mundane. There was a hidden meaning behind everything. That was second. Third, he should never let his heart slip from behind his mask.
The first two had been proven true. A simple list was spellbinding. The contents of an old trunk could change one’s destiny. And a line of inked skin was an eternal cage. But the third lesson was more complicated.
Autumn’s High Lord possessed all he’d ever desired. Power thrummed in his veins. His family and Court were safe from Beron. And his beautiful mate was here in his home. Azriel was bound to him. His heart had led him here.
Yet this very same heart left his mouth full of ash, turning the fruit of his labors to husks. For Eris knew it was fleeting, a trick of the light. The true magic was in the gift he’d offer his mate: a choice.
Azriel stepped back from the High Lord of Night and placed a scarred hand on his left rib. Eris walked to stand before his mate. His eyes met hazel, clouded with confusion and hurt. "Do you trust me?" he wanted to ask, to beg for it.
Please let me know if you ever want on our off the tag | @the-darkestminds @fieldofdaisiies @mistandmemories @c-starstuff-man0 @molcat07 @chunkypossum @going-through-shit @talibunny30 @yanny-77 @lilah-asteria @amalhe-kofee @futurehunt @seihdacalling @honeysuckle-daydreams13 @unanswered-stars @that-girl-reading @christeareads @g00seg1rl
#azris fanfiction#azriel x eris#azris#azris supremacy#eris vanserra#acotar fanfiction#acotar#azriel#acotar fandom#azris fic#azris fanfic#eris x azriel
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Hollowed out
Azriel x Eris
This is the fic I made for my giftee; @gravitysthrall! I'm so excited and happy I got to participate in this and a big thanks to all the amazing people who organised it. Dividers by @tsunami-of-tears
Word Count: 6039
Warnings: Angst, Swearing, Hurt/comfort, Fluff, some suggestiveness, brief panic attack/breakdown
The halls are quiet. It is to be expected, given the late hour, most are in bed by now, yet here I walk, up and down halls, waiting. For what? Eris, the High Lord of Autumn, to finally come out of his hobbit hole of an office and take a break. My pace slows as I cross that door, the royal bed chambers. Neither Eris nor I have used them since Berons' death. It bears too many bad memories, haunts the residents of the forest house.
My gaze lingers on the ancient wood arch, the intricate pictures carved meticulously by skilled hands. It must have taken hours, such a shame that the details get overlooked by everyone because of a reputation left by someone else.
My footsteps continue on silently as I make my way to my mate, guided by that golden thread. He has blocked his side of the bond. Again.
I try not to let the hurt creep in, I understand he's a High Lord now, his duties and responsibilities have grown exponentially since the war, he can only split his time between so many things. The logical part of my brain tries to convince me of this, but my heart cries out for help. Lately, the bond is blocked more often than not and between paperwork and my missions, physical contact hasn't been available either.
I stop in front of his door. If it weren't for the wards, I'm sure I'd hear the furious scratching of a quill on paper.
Pushing aside the barrier, I walk in, making my steps audible for his benefit. Eris doesn't lift his head, or hum, or acknowledge me in any way shape or form and my heart cracks a little more. It's been like this, cold and unfeeling, for far too long, I don't know how much more of it I can take.
"Eris?"
Nothing.
My jaw tightens.
"High Lord" I grit out between clenched teeth. Is this really what I've been reduced to? Just another fae begging for the favor of his Lord instead of the love of his life, his mate, his husband.
"Yes, Azriel?" I swallow down my rising anger, I didn't come here to argue, and the sound of my name on his tongue almost drowns my temper anyway. The soft care in my voice comes naturally.
"Eris, don't you think it's time to take a break? You've been in here for hours, you haven't eaten or had something to drink since this morning, come, have dinner with me" The time for dinner has long since passed, but I'd do anything to make him walk out of this room, where he has unknowingly imprisoned himself.
"Please" The desperation in my tone isn't subtle, and I can't bring myself to be embarrassed about it because that's what I am. Desperate. A child begging for scraps of attention.
He stays silent for what feels like an eternity longer, the clock ticking, time running through my fingers, unable to grab hold, just swept along with the tide like dust under the carpet.
The scribbling of his quill pauses, he sighs, looks into my eyes, and for just a moment, I see the affection he once had for me. For a moment, hope squeezes my heart and I don't want it to end.
Eris's amber orbs study me, then wander back to the paper, however the reluctance to do so is the thread I grasp to tug him back to me.
"I promise the paper's will still be there when you get back, an hour is all I ask" I wanted to ask for two, but I feel I'm already asking for too much. At this point, I'd cherish ten minutes.
He sighs again and rubs his eyes, the bags beneath them a stark contrast to his sallow skin. Even his freckles seem to have lost their vibrancy.
"Alright, I'll have dinner with you, right after I finish this document, I'll come down to our room" In any other situation, I would have bristled at how he made spending time with me sound like a chore, but I was too happy with his acquiescence.
I walked calmly out the room, giving my mate a smile, which he returned in a grimace like fashion. Once I crossed the threshold and was out of Eris's line of sight, my shadows hurtled themselves toward the kitchens. I invited Eris to dinner, but I didn't actually have anything prepared, and none of the staff would be awake, it's almost one in the morning.
The shadows were giddy, skittering along the walls and floor, some of them climbing the ceiling. Their voices all flooded me at once, fighting for space in my head, they were yelling about what to make. One of them suggested a three course meal and they were all too happy to jump on that idea.
We don't have time to make a feast, and Eris certainly won't have time to eat all of it. Think simple, we'll prepare a charcuterie board, gather some crackers, bread and cold meat, then we'll return to the room.
They grumbled their dissatisfaction, but complied anyway. They scoured the kitchen, slicing sourdough, whole grain, flat bread, and gathering different crackers, as well as an insanely wide assortment of cheeses. They had ham and pulled pork and salami, plating it as if it were to be presented at a banquet. They had always loved doing these sorts of things for Eris, and after being deprived of it for so long, they were going to turn simple into gourmet.
They helped me carry it all to our room, the bed was still made, telling me that Eris hadn't slept at all last night. Servants weren't allowed in our room, I was on a mission, and Eris never made the bed, he didn't see the need if you were just going to mess it up again the next night. I closed my eyes, letting the memory wash over me.
"You don't make your bed in the morning?" Eris rolled his eyes.
"No. Not anymore at least, not since I was the general" He picked up the pillow I had just placed putting it askew again and I huffed.
"Why not? You're a neat freak with everything else, but your bed is the only exception?"
"I see no point in making our bed when we mess it up so frequently" He pulled me toward him by the arm, wrapping his around my neck when our bodies collided. He guided the both of us backwards until the back of his knees hit the bed frame, Eris spun us around mid-fall so I was pinned under him. He leaned in so close we shared each breath and his eyes darkened, flitting between mine and my lips. I surged up, closing the distance, and threaded my fingers in his red locks.
The bed was indeed, messed again.
I set down all the plates, leaving enough room for Eris and I to sit against the pillows, the shadows fussed over every detail while we waited for my mate.
Ten minutes passed.
Then thirty.
Then an hour. Still no sign of my husband. I couldn't even feel the exhaustion, the anger was too great, but still I stayed.
The sun was starting to peak over the horizon when I finally decided to leave. The shadows drooped like wilted plants, my wings dragged slightly. I tried to figure out what I was feeling.
I had every reason to be angry, to be furious, but I wasn't. Was I worried? Did some part of my subconscious think something had happened to Eris? It didn't feel like it. My mind raced through all the options, as I trudged to one of the spare rooms. I didn't want to sleep in our bed, so I lay awake in another, but it wasn't till the first bell rang, signalling five am that I found the word I was searching for.
Hollow.
That's how I felt. Hollow.
It sent a pang through my heart and I wanted to curl up into a ball and cry, but I had no tears left. Day after day, night after night, Eris and I had become strangers and it hurt. It fucking hurt.
My eyes wandered over the mahogany ceiling aimlessly, my mind swimming in doubt and shattered expectations. Expectations. I scoffed at myself in my head. More like childish wishes.
The pain seeped back into me, and I made my decision.
I have to leave.
Leave Autumn, leave Eris, leave this entire mess of a life. Just for a bit. Just for some space to think and gather myself, to figure out my next move because if this is to be my life with him, my mate. Even in my own thoughts, my voice cracked.
Then I'll have to- I couldn't complete the thought. Rejecting the bond, ending what Eris and I had spent years building... I don't think I could survive it. I don't think I'd want to.
I packed a bag. It didn't contain much, just some clothes. I still had a few pairs back at the cabin, but I preferred these, they were more comfortable.
And they smell like Autumn! The shadows pitched in, I ignored that comment however. I didn't want to admit that even while angry at him, I still sought out Eris for comfort. I did not need to be reminded right now that I need him much more than he needs me.
Usually when I wanted to clear my head, I'd fly, but the weight in my chest was so heavy, I feared I'd plummet like a rock.
The shadows swarmed around me, pulling me from my empty bedroom, to the empty cabin. The second I had fully materialised, Rhysand was in my head.
Azriel? What are you doing here? Are you alright? Did something happen?
It had taken time for the inner circle to accept my mating with Eris; they had eventually come around, but none of them really trusted him, especially not Rhys. He was always just waiting for something to happen, waiting for Eris to do something so that he could take me back to the Night Court.
I knew it was because he cared, and that the worry in his tone was genuine, but I was too tired to explain to him what was going on.
I'm fine, everything's fine.
I could feel him lift his eyebrow, could picture the 'Do you think I'm a blind idiot' look on his face.
I just need a break from... From what? Eris? I couldn't say that, not because it wasn't true, because technically, it was, but because it would hurt to admit it.
I decided to forgo the rest of my sentence. Is it ok if I stay here? Just for a few days.
A pause ensued, then in a much softer tone, an understanding one, he said; Of course Azriel, you will always be welcome here.
And I felt in my bones that it was true, I just didn't want to think about what that might mean for me.
Eris's Pov
I was going to break that infernal clock, tick tick ticking in the back of my head like the pressure of how little time I had wasn't enough already.
I had just finished the paper I was working on, but one more couldn't hurt, it would just mean less work for tomorrow, maybe then I could spend some time with my mate. Liar, there is always more work to do the next day.
I pushed the voice down, trying fruitlessly to smother it. Azriel was right, I needed a break. And right after this paper, I'd get one. Azriel and I would have dinner, and maybe, just maybe, we could fall asleep in each other's arms again. What I wouldn't give for that?
I finished putting the last signature on the bottom of the page to approve the project. It was for some agriculture thing, I didn't have enough head space to really go into too much detail, just enough to know it would help.
I got up from the desk, stretching, but my eyes got caught on another document. That one is quick to fill out, it will take me five minutes at most, Azriel will understand, he always does.
I haven't thanked my mate enough for the patience he's had with me, I haven't had the time to, but I will. Once all the things from my father's reign have been sorted, I'll be able to show him how much I appreciated his love and support.
The clock continues its ticking, and I'm only vaguely aware of the time passing, pulled once again into the onslaught of paperwork that buries my desk. One report turned into two, then to five, then a stack.
I'm pulled out once again when a thud is heard to my right. My head snaps up, eyes locking with the target. It's one of the early rising servants, dropping off another stack of papers and documents for me to sign. I whip around to look at the clock to see it is indeed eight o’clock in the morning.
I look back at her and she smiles sheepishly, then leaves. They may be light footed, but I should have heard her open the door. Had she been an assassin, I'd be dead. The lack of sleep really is getting to me.
I run my hands over my face and pick up the quill again, resigned to another day filled with endless words on paper and that bloody clock.
Sliding over the next thing, I can't help but pause at this nagging feeling that I've forgotten something. It claws at my insides, churning my gut, but I have to focus on what's important, I have to-
Azriel
Shit!
I completely forgot. I drop my quill, and shove the doors aside. I'm walking so fast that it could be considered a run but I need to see Azriel, my mate. I need to apologise, to explain, to-
The room is empty save for the spread of meat and cheeses with an assortment of bread and crackers now plagued with flies. My head pivots, searching for any hint of Azriel, the only sign he'd been here was his lingering scent.
I took a moment to breathe it in. Night chilled mist and cedar. Cauldrons I loved his scent, and his wings, and his smile. I just loved him.
His wingspan could sometimes be a pain in my ass (literally) but cauldron boil and fry me, it felt heavenly.
I opened my side of the bond reaching out, but all I was met with was solid walls. My heart stopped. Have I finally pushed him too far?
I tug harder, but am met with no response, dread settles in my stomach. What have I done?
I get the creeping feeling of being watched, and a few of my mate's shadows twirl into view. Usually the sight of them would reassure me, but something about their presence now was foreboding.
"Where is Azriel?" My voice is a mere whisper, but it seemed to echo in the room. They just sat there, dancing on the spot, never still, never motionless. It was unnerving. The slow fluidity of this dark entity, nothing in nature moved like that.
They finally left that spot on the floor, racing down the hall. "Wait" They did not.
I chased after them, barely keeping the swirls of black in view, every time they turned a corner, I thought I'd lose them. They slithered under one of the guest bedrooms, and without question, I flung the doors to the side.
Nothing.
No Azriel.
I looked to the shadows in question. "Why have you brought me here?" Obviously they gave no verbal response, they couldn't, but they just... disappeared. Vanished into thin air. Leaving behind a note in Az's handwriting. I just looked at it, thinking of all the effort he'd put in to be able to write in fancy script.
I picked up the note, reading it quietly to myself. Then reading it again, and again until it stuck.
Dear Eris,
If you're reading this, you've finally come out of your office. You do not need to worry about me, I'm safe in the Night Court, Rhysand knows I'm here.
Don't come get me. When I'm ready, I'll come back, but for now, I just need some time to think.
Sincerely, Your Shadow Azriel
In so few, simple words, I felt my heart crumble. I desperately clawed at the wall blocking me from my mate, but it held strong.
I could feel the panic rise within me, my breath coming in short gasps. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This can't be happening. I can't- I can't do this without him. I can't. I need him, I need my mate I-
My knees gave out from beneath me, and I hit the floor hard, the sudden bite of pain becoming a small drop in what was quickly gathering to be an ocean.
Azriel left. My mate left.
The words clanged through me with such clarity, I couldn't have stopped the tears if I tried. I broke down for the first time in centuries. Azriel was gone and it was all my fault, I drove him away, I neglected him.
Just like my father did to my mother.
That was the last straw. Loud ugly sobs fell from my lips, my body caved in on itself. How could I let this happen, how could I do this to him?
I stayed there for hours, until I had no more tears, until my throat was raw and no sound could come out. I crawled up onto the bed, curling my body around the pillow he'd used on his last night here. He said not to go after him, that he needed space. I could give him that. I will give him that. Even if it hurts.
3rd person Pov
Eris got up the morning after, feeling more tired than he had all month, his bones felt like they were made of granite but as frail as sandstone.
Days passed by painfully slow. He tried to focus, to tackle those papers that had driven him from his mate, but everything felt overwhelming. The sun was too bright, the stacks too high, his bed too warm, nothing felt right. Eris couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, he couldn't breathe. He felt like he was suffocating, choking on his own actions and he just wanted his mate back in his arms. He was prepared to do anything to bring Azriel home.
But alas, no word from the shadow singer had reached his ears. It had been twelve days, neither Az nor anyone else from the Night Court had told him anything. It was driving him mad. Had something happened? Or was this really the end?
Another tear slipped out. His eyes burned from all the crying, all the sleepless nights filled with worry and anxiety. There was this perpetual feeling of nausea that he couldn't seem to shake, no tonic or pill worked.
He couldn't take it anymore, he needed to know. Eris winnowed into the town house. He knew Rhysand didn't live there, but it would get his attention.
He didn't have to wait long before the High Lord and Lady of Night as well as the general stood before him, all with scowls on their faces.
"Eris" Rhysand said tersely, his jaw clenched. Eris's eyes were bloodshot, but he couldn't find it in himself to care.
"How is he? Is he alright?" The High Lord's voice came out soft but clear.
"Azriel will speak to you when he is ready" Feyre spoke this time, eyes narrowed.
"I know, I'm not here to force him to see me, I just- I need to know he's ok" The waver in his voice was slight, but there. They all picked up on it, however, had no intention of faltering.
Cassian was about to add his two cents when Azriel appeared in the shadows.
His face was unreadable, but the knotted black curls and massive eye bags were a testament to how much he had been struggling despite being the one to have initiated the space.
Eris swallowed but didn't speak. Just stared at his lover with desperation.
Everyone stared at Azriel, waiting for him to say something.
"Thank you for defending my privacy, but I would like to speak to Eris alone" It was not lost on the red headed fae that Azriel had called him by his name, instead of saying 'my mate' like he usually would have.
Rhysand, Feyre, and Cassian slowly left, they didn't winnow away, just vacated the room, and Rhysand put up wards to give them privacy, staying close in case Eris tried anything.
For a long time, they stood in silence, neither knowing what to say until Eris cleared his throat. "Are you sure you're ready to talk to me? I did not come here with the intention of forcing an interaction between us." The words hurt him, he didn't want to leave without his mate, but if that's what Azriel wanted, he would give him that.
"If you need more- more space then-"
"No"
"...No?"
"I'm done with space. We need to figure this out. Now or never."
Eris nodded, but he was unsure if he should say something, or wait for Azriel to speak first.
Azriel sighed, and sat down at the table, motioning for Eris to do the same. Somehow, this felt worse than standing, but he complied nonetheless.
Azriel rested both arms on the table, fingers interlocked. He raised his hazel eyes to look into Eris's amber ones.
"I'm going to ask you a question, Eris, and I need you to answer honestly, can you do that?" He nods.
"Do you still want this bond, or would you rather have us reject it?”
How could he say that? Eris was appalled, he knew he'd been neglectful, but Azriel couldn't actually believe he regretted this, regretted them, could he? No, it was unthinkable, Eris refused to believe it.
"Azriel, you don't mean that, you can't." He shook his head, his heart felt like it was being squeezed to the point it might explode.
"Answer the question." Azriel's voice was devoid of emotion. Eris grit his teeth, not liking the tone his mate was using on him. That voice was for prisoner's, not him.
"No, Azriel, I don't want to reject the bond" There was a little bite to his voice before a realisation hit him. His words came out small, and meek.
"Do you?"
Eris prayed that wasn't the case, he would beg on his hands and knees if he had to, he would burn those papers, and close off his office if that's what he wanted. Eris was prepared to give up his throne if it would make Azriel reconsider.
"No, I don't, I never have" The relief flooded Eris, the grip on his heart loosened just a bit, just enough for him to breathe again.
"But things cannot go on the way they have. I am tired of not being your first priority, of not even being your tenth!" The spymaster raised his voice for the first time that night. "There is always something that needs to happen. There's always paperwork; documents, complaints, reports, there is always some tradition in one of the villages that people barely remember because Beron forbade it that suddenly wants you to attend."
His breathing was growing heavier with each point, and it was clear he'd been keeping this bottled inside for a long time. "Then finally we find a time in which our free times could align through no small effort, and out of nowhere, the Lords call for an emergency meeting, to discuss their decreased cash flow."
Everything he was saying was true, Eris couldn't defend himself, not that he had any ground to stand on in the first place, so he just listened to Azriel lament.
"And I know, believe me, I know that being a new High Lord is a lot of pressure. I don't pretend to understand what you have gone through nor what you are currently going through, and I've tried to be patient but-"
Azriel's voice cracked mid sentence. He took a deep breath, and Eris had to strain his ears to hear him now.
"I can't. I can't live like this. Barely seeing you for weeks on end just to be brushed off I-" He was visibly shaking now, the tremor in his words reflected his state and his eyes, his beautiful hazel eyes had taken on a glassy sheen.
"Eris, it should pain you to be away from me-"
"It does" He promised, staring at Azriel's face, committing every detail to memory like he was going to slip out of his grasp.
"Not like it hurts me" Az was shaking his head, his heart on his sleeve.
Eris scoffed. "What are you talking about? I hate the distance just as much as you do, more, even. This week especially has been so painful-"
"Clearly not painful enough!"
"What do you mean 'Not painful enough'? It has been excruciating for me! How would you even know? You haven't been around-"
"Because you're not the one falling apart!"
"Of course I'm falling apart Azriel! You left! How was I supposed to feel about that?!"
"Nothing. You were supposed to feel absolutely nothing"
"What the fuck are you trying to say?" Eris was seething now. How dare he insinuate that this hadn't been hard on him too?
"That you. Don't. Care, until there are consequences"
Eris opened his mouth to retort, but was interrupted before he could. "I was gone for three hours. Three hours, Eris, before you even noticed I'd left. Three hours before you came out of your office like you'd said you would. 'My word to you will always be true, this I promise' that was one of our vows to each other, and I cannot count the amount of times you've broken it."
He was stunned into silence, the weight of it all crashing down on him hard. "You had been blissfully unaware while I second guessed our mating"
Tears were streaming down both their faces, wild and unrestrained. Their breathing was ragged, and despite the cacophony of emotions, they both just wanted to comfort the other. But too many feelings left unresolved prevented them from doing so, instead, they stewed in the silence, the only sounds being the occasional sniffle or sharp exhale.
"Azriel I- I'm so sorry. I didn't realise what all this was doing to you. I should have known, should have seen the signs. As your husband, as your mate I should have- Cauldrons Azriel, I can't express how sorry I am, words don't do it justice, but I will find a way to make it up to you. I will. I don't know how, yet, but that, I can promise you."
The shadow singer nods. Eris wants to ask what happens now, does he return, or will he stay in the sanctuary of the Night Court? He waits for him to say something, but is left empty handed. He is the one to nod this time, winnowing back to his court.
Eris lies awake, thinking of ways to make it up to Azriel. If it were anyone else, he'd formulate a plan to execute some grand gesture, but this was Azriel. Azriel does not do grand gestures. It should make it easier but instead, it leaves Eris walking circles in his head, tormenting himself with wanting to do more, but knowing his lover wouldn't like it, and everything else just feeling like it would fall short.
It wasn't until well into the night that Eris felt Azriel return to the forest house. He held his breath, both wishing for him to take the corridor to the bedroom he occupied (It didn't feel right to sleep in their shared bed without Az there) and praying he didn't. What could he say? He was nowhere near ready to talk to Azriel, yet that was all he wanted to do.
Azriel went to a different bedroom, one just a few passageways to the left. His heart sank, however he scolded himself saying it was for the best, and that he hadn't earned being in the same bed yet.
Although when a small little shadow crept up, twining itself in between Eris's long fingers, he couldn't help but bring the little creature closer to his face, and smile.
Time skip
Over the next two weeks, Eris tried his best to earn Azriel back, he had started by showing up at his door and asking him out on a date. He half thought that Azriel would decline and slam the door in his face but by some miracle, the shadowsinger found it in him to take Eris's olive branch.
That first date seemed to open the flood gates. Every other day they'd be out, in the forest, a village, they'd even gone out of Autumn once or twice. The Lords made sure to make their displeasure known and the piles of paperwork were stacking up again faster than Eris could make them go down, but he ignored it in favor of his mate.
He obviously couldn't neglect his High Lord duties completely, he still held audiences when requested, and he did what paperwork he could, but he'd finally taken a leap, and removed many of the lords from the board.
He still hadn't found replacements for all of them, but it was some much needed progress. Having people he could trust to surround him and try to guide his rule instead of the power hungry toads admittedly made it quite a bit easier. Eris felt like he was in control of his responsibilities for the first time in years, since he started his reign, actually.
But it wasn't until recently, that Azriel truly forgave him.
Eris had walked up to Azriel's door, just like he had numerous times in the past fortnight. He waited nervously for him to answer, running his fingers through his hair and smoothing out his clothes. He loved Azriel, truly, but he absolutely hated how he was reduced to a twenty year old with no experience every time he asked him out.
The door opened, and there stood the love of his life donning Autumn finery. They had gotten into many teasing arguments about the garments over the years, Azriel always claiming it was over the top and Eris countering that he was technically a High Lord now too, even if he didn't bare the title (Because Azriel had refused, not because Eris hadn't offered) so the clothes were befitting someone of his station.
Azriel had laughed uproariously at that.
"Hello," Azriel said from inside the door frame. "I don't believe we had a date scheduled, unless I'm mistaken?"
"You're not, mistaken, that is. I wanted to surprise you, if that's alright?" Azriel wasn't overly fond of surprises. To be frank, neither was Eris, but he'd think this might be an exception.
Azriel raised both eyebrows. "Consider me surprised"
Eris blushed. Fucking. Blushed. What in the name of the mother did this male do to him?
"Would you- ahem- Would you please come with me into the dining hall?" Eris said, clearing his voice when it came out a bit too timid.
Azriel nodded slowly. "Sure, just let me change into something else"
"No one else will be there, so just that is fine." He insisted, because if he waits any longer, he might get cold feet and back out.
Once again surprise spreads across the Illyrians face, usually it is Eris who is so adamant on being 'properly adorned' for such occasions, even in the comfort of their own home.
"Alright" He says, closing the door behind him. "Lead the way, High Lord"
Oh, Azriel was trying to kill him, wasn't he? He never calls him High Lord unless he's angry, or wants Eris's attention on him for... other reasons. Much more pleasurable ones. He really hopes it's the second option and gulps as he steps in front of his mate to lead.
He holds the door as his beloved shadow steps in, taking in the spread laid out before them.
"Apologies if it's not on par with the usual cuisine served, I'm not the best cook, even with specific, and detailed instructions."
The male whips around staring at him. "You made all this?"
Eris nods "I did. Figured I had to make up for the dinner I'd missed. And, you know, all the ones before that." He breathes in deeply, preparing himself for his next words. "Look, I know that what I did was wrong, even if I never meant to hurt you, I did. And I'm not afraid to admit that I still don't quite know how to fully bring you back to me, but I-"
The air is knocked out of him by a body colliding with his, preventing the rest of his speech from leaving his lips.
"You just did" The words are mumbled into the junction of his neck, but he hears them just fine. The stress, and tension melts away as he wraps his arms around Azriel for the first time in way too long.
Tears of joy appear in the corners of his eyes but they are wiped away by his mate's thumbs as his scarred hands cup Eris's face. The words he so desperately needed falling effortlessly from the spymaster's lips.
"I love you, and I forgive you." Their emotions flood the bond and they fall to the floor together, holding one another in a tight embrace.
"Thank you, I promise, I will never treat you like that again. Never."
A few days later
Sunlight fell through the curtains onto their faces, gently waking up the two lovers. They were having a slow morning, it was ten and they still hadn't even gotten up for breakfast. They chose to instead lay in each other's embrace, enjoying the tranquility of it.
Tranquility that was broken by a knock. Eris sighed, running his hands over his face. He stretched and quickly threw on some pants along with a robe to at least cover himself a little.
He opened the door, shocking the servant on the other side who hastily lowered her gaze upon realising her High Lord was shirtless, choosing instead to speak to the floor rather than look him in the eyes.
"High Lord, I'm greatly sorry to disturb you, but the Lords are requesting a meeting on an improved payment plan for the agricultural contributors of Autumn, as well as some trade routes."
He nods, thanking her. When he walks back, Azriel is still in bed, eyes closed, the covers only concealing half of him. Eris smiled and dreaded leaving him.
"The lords want to hold a meeting about a few comings and goings of Autumn." He was sure Azriel had heard, especially with the little shadows constantly whispering information to him.
His mate only hummed, the picture of relaxation. "It's alright, you can go" Damn Azriel and his uncanny ability to read him, of course he knew that was the real reason why he'd repeated the information to him.
"Are you sure?" He asked, he never wanted to feel that again, never wanted to drive his mate away, so he just had to ask one more time.
"Yes, I'm sure." Eris accepted this. If Az really wasn't ok with it, he would say something.
Eris busied himself with getting ready, he took a quick shower, combed his hair and got dressed. It wasn't until he had just finished primping and was almost out the door that Azriel spoke up, calling Eris's name.
"Yes, my love?"
"I'm going to organise lunch for us, so I'll be waiting for you in the dining hall, go there once you're done." Eris stayed in the doorway, sensing there was more. "And afterwards... would you like to mess the bed with me?" A mischievous grin painted his face.
"Always"
A/n: That's the end! I hope you enjoyed, it was a bit longer than I thought it'd be but I'm just glad it's done on time. This was the first fic I've ever written proper angst for, hope it wasn't horrible.
Have a very Merry Christmas
From: @azrielsshadows42
To: @gravitysthrall
Thank you @acotargiftexchange
#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#azris#azriel x eris#azris fanfiction#azris supremacy#pro azris#azris fic#acotar fanfiction#azriel shadowsinger#azriel spymaster#azriel acotar#azriel x eris vanserra#eris fanfic#eris fanfiction#eris acotar#eris vanserra#eris vandaddy#High lord of autumn#eris x azriel#high lord eris#secret Santa#acotar gift exchange#gift exchange
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If Only In My Dreams
Ao3 Link
Eris receives a gift in the form of a visitor on Solstice. The gift goes both ways.
Azris Holiday Fic for the @acotargiftexchange
For you, @azrielsshadows42 --I hope that this makes you smile, and I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it! A little art comes with it tomorrow ;) Enjoy!
When Eris awoke, it wasn’t the unpleasant jolting awake from nightmares that he’d grown used to over the last five centuries.
The room was still comfortably dark and warm, the low embers from the fireplace hardly glowing amongst the ash and coals. The Solstice candles in his window had long since burned down, pools of wax dried and stiff beneath them. He’d been sleeping on his stomach atop the silk sheets, his face tucked into the crook of an arm folded beneath his head. Though most nights now he slept less fitfully, surrounded by plush velvet in the traditional earthen tones of the Forest House, he still had a tendency to jerk awake. Some nights, the nightmares still thrust him into consciousness, biting back a scream and covered in a cold sweat.
This, however, had been a soft awakening, one that left him feeling well-rested despite the late hour. He hadn’t moved since opening his eyes—he didn’t need to. He could feel the stirring presence without seeking it out, the thrumming and pulsing notable even in the dead silence.
He wouldn’t make a sound until Eris had addressed his presence.
Eris sighed, feeling his own breath skate across the forearm that still cradled his head.
“Shadowsinger.” His guest did not move, no rustling of fabric or wings to expose himself, but after a time, he did respond.
“High Lord.” The male’s voice was low and smooth, tumbling through the darkness as though it belonged there. Eris barely suppressed a shiver. Still, he did not move, resisting the near soul-rending urge to track the male with his eyes.
He kept his voice measured, focused on slowing the beat of his racing heart. Azriel would hear it–he always did. “I don’t know how you keep getting in here.”
“It’s not hard.”
Eris nearly snorted at that, the urge to make a joke sitting heavy on the back of his tongue.
“What is it you want?” The words were meant to be clipped, but they emerged more breathless than he’d intended, the sound carrying quietly through the air. There was no response from across the room, but Eris felt the lightest touch across his lower back, exposed with the sheet at his waist. It was like a warm breeze, dancing over his skin and pebbling his exposed flesh with goosebumps.
He wasn’t sure why, but he’d never imagined the shadows as being warm. Long ago, he’d wondered more than once if they’d feel cold and unforgiving against his skin. He’d imagined, cock in hand, on quite a few occasions whether or not they might feel like a rush of night air against him. Would they feel firm like flesh, or ephemeral and otherworldly? The first time those imaginings had come to life, he’d been pleasantly surprised at the warm caress, the sweeping heat of them across his already-flushed skin.
The shadow twisted and undulated up his spine, Eris fighting the arch in his back until the touch skittered devilishly over his shoulders and up to the pointed tip of his ear.
It wasn’t often Azriel let them out to play, but Eris always enjoyed it when he did.
He startled at the bowing mattress beside him, so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t noticed Azriel coming closer.
“I’m sorry I woke you.”
“No, you aren’t.” There was no displeasure in Eris’ response. He wasn’t sorry either.
Azriel’s hand traced the same path the shadow had, trailing slowly from Eris’ ass to his spine, the textured surface brushing over the dips and valleys of his own scars. This time, Eris couldn’t fight off the shudder that ran through him. He didn’t need to look at Azriel to know he’d find that bragging smirk barely toying at the edges of his mouth, but he did anyway.
Each and every time, he was struck by the beauty of the Illyrian. The Shadowsinger of the Night Court, hewn from darkness and marble, from night and from cobalt, exacting his payment in screams, one way or another. His eyes reminded Eris of the forest floor, fallen leaves and moss glowing beneath the sun-dappled skies. They were earthen, they were heavenly, they were not of this world.
“No, I am not.” Azriel slid his hand up Eris’ neck, finding purchase in his hair and tugging back enough that Eris’ head left the safety of his arm, arching back without his eyes ever once leaving the male’s.
“I’ll ask you again, Shadowsinger,” Eris felt the shiver through the hand holding his hair as he drew out each syllable. “What is it that you want?”
It was Solstice, and Eris knew Azriel had spent it with his family. All day long, he’d been throwing snowballs with his idiot brothers. Eris fought back a scoff. He knew for dinner, he would have been sequestered with the entirety of their friend group, which was overwhelming at the very best of times. His Shadowsinger liked quiet, and as much as Eris knew he loved his family, he also knew the lack of control over his schedule exhausted him, leaving him ragged and twitchy in the aftermath.
Eris loved nothing more than rebuilding that control with him. They’d had plenty of fun in the past as they’d both learned what the other needed. All Azriel had to do was say the words.
The room was quiet, the air feeling as though it was breathing in and out with them as Eris waited. It was all part of the game, part of the buildup that they knew and loved so well. The bed shifted as Azriel leaned in closer, his breath caressing Eris’ ear on an exhale before he spoke.
“I want you.”
It was all the permission he needed.
In seconds, Eris had risen entirely from the bed, standing next to it wearing nothing but a pair of undershorts he slept in. He ran hot, and he kept the room warm with blankets sturdy enough to keep the chill away even on the coldest nights. Azriel acquiesced to the shift in their dynamic, despite his easy ability to go toe-to-toe with Eris in most circumstances. Eris bit back a groan at the sight. Azriel fell on his knees by the bed, the nearly nonexistent light from the hearth illuminating only the sharpest planes of his face.
“You’ve got me, then,” Eris spoke through a smirk, lacing his fingers tightly through Azriel’s dark curls. Azriel’s eyes slipped shut at the gesture, his palms sliding up Eris’ bare thighs, burning to the touch. Eris touched his other hand to Azriel’s cheek, cupping his jaw, and Azriel leaned in to it. “Open your eyes and look at me, Shadowsinger.”
He did. Eris’ eyes adjusted in the dark, the glowing hazel orbs piercing through him though they looked up through lowered lashes. He felt the gaze all the way down his body, settling warm in his lower belly like a cat in front of a fire. In his eyes, he felt his need reflected, the abject wanting so apparent that it nearly sent Eris to his own knees. He’d never tire of the ache he felt around this male. No one else could undo him so thoroughly.
“Take off your shirt,” Eris demanded, and Azriel quickly obliged, removing each of the buckles and buttons meticulously and efficiently, tossing the leathers onto the ground behind him and letting his wings stretch as Eris stared on in approval.
“Are you going to be good for me?” Eris asked, injecting the teasing tone so thoroughly into his voice that he almost annoyed himself . He could see Azriel losing the fight against rolling his own eyes before taking a deep breath and agreeing, his nod only perceptible in the dark room by Eris’ hand still pressed against him. “Ah, ah. Good males use their words.”
Azriel’s wings twitched and rustled as he bared his teeth, his every instinct fighting against the urge to be bossed around and spoken down to. But Eris knew what he liked, knew he craved the order, and he tightened the grip on his curls.
“Yes, I’m going to be good,” Azriel gritted through clenched teeth, wings moving in slight pulses behind him in time with the beating of his heart. But Eris noticed, he always did.
“Going to be good for whom, Shadowsinger?” He relished in the quiet snarl from Azriel’s lips as he tried to pull back and couldn’t.
“For you, High Lord.”
Eris smiled. “Perfect. Now take out my cock.” Despite there only being a single layer of pressed silk holding his erection back, he still desperately needed it off. Azriel wasted no time reaching for the waistband, pulling the shorts down so slowly Eris almost released a snarl of his own. He gasped at the first touch of open air against flushed skin, then bit back the groan roaring within him demanding release as Azriel gripped his cock firmly in his hand.
Eris was just about to tell him to continue when Azriel took him into his mouth, the wet heat of it nearly sending Eris’ soul from his body as he gripped the bedpost for balance. He could feel Azriel’s smile trying to work against the stretch of his lips, and he growled in response, tightening the hold on his hair and taking matters into his own hands. If Azriel was feeling bratty tonight, Eris would gladly indulge him.
With his free hand, Eris reached out, long fingers brushing across the wings that were directly at arm’s height when Azriel kneeled before him. He felt the male jerk beneath him, lips pulling tight around him as his body tensed and released.
“Are we going to behave, Shadowsinger?” Eris’ tone was lofty, betraying nothing of the absolute upheaval surging within his veins. Azriel’s mouth on him was incomprehensible, and he knew absolutely every way to undo Eris entirely. But in response, Azriel only doubled down his efforts, taking Eris deeper into his throat and swallowing around him so matter-of-factly that the air nearly punched from Eris’ lungs.
Eris ran his hand along the uppermost ridge of the wing, the skin feather-soft and moveable over tendons, tissue, and bone. He loved the stupid bat’s wings, had been mesmerized by them since the first time he’d seen them. And when Azriel had finally invited him to touch them, it had been a night of discovery for them both. He had memorized every scar, every bump and jagged line that marred the membranes since. He knew the places that made his Shadowsinger squirm and the ones that made him hum with quiet contentment or scream with unyielding ecstasy. He prided himself on knowing these wings, a map of his lover, and as he slid fingers up to grasp the talon, he grinned as he felt Azriel buck beneath him.
Eris allowed his eyes to slip closed and his head to tip back as he reveled in the feeling of Azriel losing pace beneath him, knowing intimately each movement he made without looking. He sighed as he felt the hands caressing over his legs, blunt nails lightly scratching across freckled thighs as he grabbed and pulled for more, the touches on his wing making him wild. Eris allowed himself to rock forward, finding pace as Azriel relented to him, submitted to him. He wanted to look down at his Shadowsinger, Spymaster for the entire court of Night, as he ruined him, while he fucked into his pretty mouth with abandon. But he knew the moment he beheld the male’s face, he’d be done, and he wanted this to last.
His instincts, however, won out, as he twined his other hand into the lush curls of Azriel’s hair, soft and inviting. The vibrations of the humming moan around his cock almost had him coming while he scraped his nails against Azriel’s scalp. He felt Azriel’s jaw slacken, his tongue moving devilishly against the underside of him, and his own control was lost. He rocked forward once, twice, setting a brutal pace as he held the male’s head in his hands.
“ Fuck .” The word rushed out of him as a coarse whisper. It felt so good, so all-encompassing, as Azriel’s hands still ghosted across his flesh. They invited him in, asking for more, more, more, and Eris would gladly oblige.
He chanced a look and felt momentarily as though he were somewhere else, watching something so magnificent as a spectator instead of a participant. The sounds were obscene as he fucked into the Shadowsinger’s mouth, the tears streaming down Azriel’s face. Eris removed a hand from his hair, not breaking pace for even a moment, and reaching down to smear the tears so they mixed with the saliva running down the male’s chin. He exhaled harshly, loving to see the male beneath him fall apart at his hands.
“You look so pretty when you cry for me, Shadowsinger.”
Azriel didn’t respond, but instead hollowed out his cheeks and sucked hard while he reached up to take hold of Eris. Distantly, Eris heard the cracking of the bedpost he was holding onto, a barked curse from his own lips as his vision nearly blacked out. The room temperature was rising as he pulsed closer and closer to the edge, despite the fire being nearly out. He might have been embarrassed at the keening cry that left his own mouth when Azriel pulled off of him had his warm, familiarly textured hand not immediately taken over. When he came, ropes of it coating Azriel’s chest and neck, Eris couldn’t be bothered to care about a single other thing, his breath coming out in harsh pants as his vision slowly returned.
Azriel didn’t give him time to recover.
“My turn.” The words were dark with promise, and Eris could feel his traitorous body already responding again as he was pushed onto the bed.
“Hang on. I can’t–my vision–” Azriel’s laugh cut him off, and Eris was suddenly aware it wasn’t the orgasm blinding him, but the shadows. He felt them, warm and gentle but nonetheless binding across his eyes.
There was no one else he’d allow this with, no one else he trusted enough. With no time to process, he jumped as he felt the press of Azriel’s lips on his collarbone. He hadn’t felt him as he’d moved over him, the predatory nature of the Shadowsinger allowing him to move in absolute silence Eris arched into the touch, body begging for more. Azriel’s mouth moved up the column of Eris’ neck, hot kisses and licks left in its wake.
“Please.” Eris whispered the word into the darkness, a plea, for what he wasn’t sure.
“Now, now, fireling. You’ll get what I give and you’ll thank me for it.” Azriel’s voice had changed, the tone and tempo low and filled with the threat of things to come. Eris shivered beneath him. As much as Eris loved the control, Azriel excelled in it. They’d learned long ago to compromise.
“I’m not a fireling anym– unh .” Azriel’s mouth was back on Eris then, his cock hard in his mouth despite the sensitivity. There was no practicality to it as there had been before, no strong efforts to get him off. Instead, Azriel took his time, swirling his tongue around his sensitive crown, fisting the base, and twisting his hand as he slowly pulled. The sensations were too much, the overwhelm too intense as Azriel continued on.
“I can’t, please. It’s too much.”
“You’ll do it because I told you to.” Eris was held to the mattress, the shadows still soft but firm now as they twisted around his arms and neck. The pull was erotic and comforting and binding all in one. They tightened around him as he groaned, allowing Azriel to resume his ministrations as Eris bucked his hips.
“You want it. I know you do,” Azriel breathed, his sinful lips still pressed to the side of Eris’ cock. Eris still couldn’t see, couldn’t sit up or to try either, as Azriel smeared his thumb over the tip of him.
Perfect.
The word hummed through Eris’ mind as he forced himself to stop straining, despite the Shadowsinger taking him into his mouth with much more enthusiasm again. The cry that left him was nearly animal, his body wanting to both lean in and jerk away. It was too much, it wasn’t enough– it was everything and nowhere near it all at once.
“Please, gods , please.”
“I’m not sure, fireling. I don’t know that you’ve earned it.” Eris felt Azriel’s fingers working lower, pausing to toy again at the base of him then moving lower still. He heard his bedside table drawer open, feet away, knowing the shadows were here to assist when he heard the clink of a small bottle opening. Without his sight, everything else was clearer. Every sound, every smell, every touch . His Shadowsinger smelled of freshly cut wood and the night air before a snow. He smelled of the outdoors, of the night sky, of that gentle undertone of spice and nutmeg that only Eris could bring out in him. His body arched at the thought.
Mine.
“That’s right, arch your back for me.” The breath that left Eris in response was ragged, his pulse jumping erratically beneath his skin, his whole body flushed. And when Azriel’s fingers met his entrance, he forced himself to relax into the touch, allowing him in without hesitation.
“Such a good High Lord, aren’t you? You’ll do anything I want.” Eris was mindless with the words. He loved it. He didn’t have it in him to brat tonight, the feelings stacking up on top of one another and riding that knife’s edge hard between pleasure and pain.
“Yes– yes !” He wasn’t above begging as Azriel added another finger then a third, the slide of the oil against his skin as erotic as the mouth on him.
Eris felt like he was going to explode from his skin, the orgasm building without his permission, threatening to boil over and take everything he was with it. It twisted around his spine, pulling his entire body taut. But every time he felt that wave cresting, Azriel would slow down, pull away, easing back into teasing licks and gentle touches.
Eris was going to lose his mind. Autumn’s new High Lord would be found naked in his bed, death caused by edging.
“Please! Gods, Azriel, please!” He would do anything, everything. He would move mountains, rearrange Prythian. He would suffer through a family dinner with Azriel’s family. So long as he could just fucking come.
“You’re so pretty when you beg.” And with that, Azriel curled his fingers, finding that spot that made Eris see stars. This time, Azriel had taken his cock deeply enough into his mouth that when he came with a muffled shout, Azriel held him still, cradled within his hips and slowing himself down enough to work Eris through it. As he came down, the shadows pulled away from his eyes, the still low glowing embers now seeming too bright by contrast.
“ Cauldron… ” He felt like he’d been gutted, killed, and reborn entirely from the pleasure of his release.
“I’m not finished with you.”
“I was under no misgivings.” His laugh was ragged, his voice hoarse as Azriel stilled between Eris’ thighs as he settled. Azriel’s wings snapped open above them, a cover that blocked even the small amounts of light in the room. Eris loved this, this bubble for just the two of them. He’d never say the words aloud, never give him the satisfaction, but if he had to admit it to himself, it was where he felt safest in the world. For a long time, it had been the only place he’d felt safe.
Azriel bowed down, bypassing Eris’ face to lower himself to the juncture of shoulder and neck. Eris struggled to hold still as the male inhaled deeply, the knowledge that he was scenting him so intoxicating that Eris couldn’t bite back the groan inching through his gritted teeth.
“Are you going to do something or just smell me like a dog?” The words had barely passed his lips before the scarred hand of the Shadowsinger had Eris’ throat in hand, squeezing just enough that the High Lord’s mind warned him, danger, danger, danger. But instead of rising to the bait, when hazel eyes met amber, Azriel just smirked then dipped again to lick up the column of Eris’ neck. The whine that left him felt more animal than fae, the wet heat of Azriel’s tongue burning into his skin like a welcome branding. He had no time to recover before the male’s lips met his own.
Kissing the Shadowsinger was unlike anything Eris had felt before, each one feeling just as explosive as the one before. Any time his plush lips met Eris’ own, it was like seeing the night sky or the Autumn trees for the very first time. It felt like rebirth, like joy, the simple pleasure of it being enough to unhinge Eris entirely, all thoughts blowing from his mind like leaves in the wind.
Eris focused long enough to reach between them, his hand finding the rough fabric over Azriel’s straining cock, realizing with stuttered thoughts that he was still wearing pants somehow. He palmed him once, then again more firmly, causing Azriel to grind forward against him.
“Good boy,” Eris said, his tone cloying again while the male sucked dark bruises into the pale skin of his neck.
“Don’t fucking push it,” he murmured, lips still attached, and the vibration that hummed through Eris nearly hardened him entirely again. Eris waved his fingers once, the metallic tang of magic burning through the air, crisp and fast, as Azriel’s clothing disappeared into the ether and he scoffed against Eris.
“No more magic tonight, fireling.”
“Not even for–”
“No. I want to do it myself.” The words ignited a new fire in Eris as Azriel kissed him, the burning back, sizzling up and down his spine while Azriel raked hands over his naked hips, pulling him closer and grinding down. The Shadowsinger gasped when Eris took him in hand, and as always, Eris marveled at the substantial heft of the male’s length. Azriel gasped into his mouth, the sound an echo chamber for the pleasure that he pulled from Eris in response, his fingers returning to brush against the crease of Eris’ ass.
Azriel enthusiastically picked up where he left off before, continuing his infuriatingly calm ministrations while Eris slowly unraveled beneath him. Immediately overwhelmed by the sensations, the feeling of Azriel’s steady fingers opening him the only point of focus.
“You take me so well, High Lord. Have I ever told you that?”
“You may have mentioned it once or twice.” In another world, Eris might have been embarrassed at the need in his voice, the absolutely unabashed wanting , but all he could think of now was the cock hard in his hand, the fingers working inside of him, the male above him, perfect lips pressing over and over into his own.
Azriel’s fingers left Eris on a whine from the High Lord, and both his hands and shadows wandered back over Eris’ hips, the shiver coursing through him rattling him to his core, urging him to arch into the feeling, the sensation. He wanted him everywhere at once, no scrap of skin untouched by his lovely hands. Then the world was turning, the startling sensation of being flipped as those perfect hands dug into his skin. As he sunk his chest into the mattress, leaning into the movement, he hoped it left bruises.
A hand smoothed up Eris’ spine, pushing the exhale from his lips like a prayer. The anticipation might kill him, the waiting winding him tighter than a coil, a bowstring nearly ready to split in two. Then the hand pushed between his shoulder blades, his body bowing into the mattress like an acolyte at an altar.
“Beautiful,” Azriel whispered, and Eris tried to strangle the emotion caught in his throat before it met the open air. He placed his forehead down on folded arms, already a thin sheen of sweat across his face.
Touch me, touch me, touch me. The words buzzed in his head, resounded through his thoughts as though the shadows sang a chorus just for the two males.
Touch him, touch him, touch him.
The mattress dipped as Azriel moved closer, leaving no room between them for stray thoughts or second guessing. The steady weight of him at his backside left a sense of calm coating the anticipation that Eris could feel marrow-deep, the knowing that, no matter what came next, he had him, body and soul. His touch was tender, coaxing, a final clink of the small glass bottle in the darkness and then the press of his cock against Eris. He tried not to flinch, forcing himself to breathe, relax, and press back into him. The noise that left Azriel took the very air from Eris’ own lungs, the sting of the stretch nothing compared to the heaven of the noises that could be wrenched from his Shadowsinger.
Azriel’s hand held onto Eris’ hip with a grip both soft and intentional, the other holding the base of himself as he forged forward. Each push longer than the last, each inch closer to the completion they both craved in each other. Eris cried out as he felt the press of hips against his skin, Azriel seated fully inside of him and holding still.
“Don’t make me beg you to move, please.” Eris’ voice was ragged, his breath stuttering out in staccato gasps at the feeling of absolute fullness, of complete oblivion. With a sound that sent a flare of arousal even more deeply through Eris, Azriel began to move, folding forward over Eris and kissing his shoulder lightly.
“But you’re so lovely when you do.” Azriel gave a quick thrust and Eris pitched forward, a keening sound leaving him as he did.
“ Fucking gods …” Eris gasped into the mattress, rumpling the sheets in his hands as Azriel began to quicken his pace. Eris could already feel his third orgasm building, the fire in his belly roaring like an inferno while the pleasure wrapped tightly around his spine.
“The only god you’ll be crying out to is me, fireling.” But Eris could hear the strain in Azriel’s voice, the sensations pouring through him mirrored in the male behind him.
“Shit, you’re tight. So good. Like heaven.” The praise fell from Azriel’s tongue, the honeyed words setting Eris’ soul alight, making him soar higher and higher, dancing on the edge of something that threatened to pull him entirely apart. Eris felt each thrust into him, moving through every piece of his body until it reverberated in his soul. The tender brush of the shadows looped around his arms up to his wrists, coiling like protective snakes and settling between his fingers as he arched back, meeting the male’s every movement.
Azriel’s pace began to falter, the shadows twitching around Azriel’s fingers as though they pulsed with him. And then, without warning, they tightened and pulled Eris back. His back met the Shadowsinger’s chest, the changing angle causing them both to call out without missing a beat while Eris’ hands fumbled to grab the headboard. He could feel Azriel’s face in his neck, sense the urge he felt as the male’s arms wrapped around his torso, one hand finding his cock and the other bracing across his ribs as he set a punishing pace.
“Bite me,” Eris panted out, knowing how close they both were.
Azriel sunk his teeth into his shoulder without hesitation, the pain giving way to blinding hot pleasure, whiting out Eris’ vision as he did.
“Tell me you’re mine, Shadowsinger. Give it all to me,” he demanded, his need overriding his good sense.
“ Fuck ,” Azriel barked out the word. “I’m yours. I’m yours.” The words were enough, pushing Eris into an orgasm so powerful he felt the wood splinter beneath his hand as he came into Azriel’s tight grip. Fire exploded into the darkness of the room, the flames engulfinging them both as it poured from Eris. Once, Azriel might have shied away, but he trusted the blaze not to burn him, the broad swaths of his shadows immediately rising and twining around the columns of fire. Azriel released Eris from his grip only to immediately grab both sides of Eris’ hips and pull his body flush with his own. Eris heard the violent snap of wings as Azriel spilled into him with a roar, the force of it so powerful they both pitched forward against the pillows and cracked wood.
The flames simmered to a dull glow as they breathed together, Azriel fully against Eris’ back, their bodies heaving in time with each other. The shadows stroked down the remaining flames, coaxing them slowly back into Eris. The warmth receded but still spilled out into the room to keep the chill away while they lowered themselves to the mattress below.
The two rolled over in the dark, bodies slicked with sweat as they panted together, the air between them heavy with breaths holding unsaid words. Instead, shaky hands moved up and down stretches of skin. Azriel’s textured flesh caused goosebumps to break out across Eris’ skin, but he could feel the same beneath his own fingers as they rolled across his Shadowsinger’s ribs, down his waist, over his hips. The shallow breaths faded to sighs to eventually peter out into a slow, steady rhythm.
When he came back enough into himself, a quick brush of magic over the two of them removed the drying, tacky mess from their bodies. Eris almost missed it every time he did, the rush of warmth across them causing Azriel to shiver in his arms. He liked being able to take care of him; it was so rare the male allowed it, and Eris cherished it in whatever way he could get away with.
They lay facing each other in silence, the embers completely gone in the hearth now, though the room was hot.
“Nesta knows.”
They were not the words Eris had been expecting, and his heart dropped at the implication. “What?”
“She knows, somehow. When I left the dinner, she saw me preparing to go. Told me to tell you happy Solstice and sent me off with that knowing smirk of hers.”
“Infuriating witch, she is.” He didn’t expect the words to draw such a laugh from Azriel. It wasn’t just a chuckle either, but a full throated one. To be completely honest, Eris did like Nesta Archeron. It didn’t make her knowing any less infuriating.
“Be glad it wasn’t Cass. At least Nesta knows how to keep a secret.”
Eris huffed. “That great bat would be shouting it from the cliffs of Ramiel.” He’d grown more amiable with most of the members of the Night Court as time had passed. It didn’t mean that he couldn’t point out their incredibly obvious flaws. Eris had a feeling Nesta wasn’t the only one who suspected– his brother’s mate took every opportunity to look at him with those knowing eyes.“I’m sure the other Archeron sister knows, too. We might as well make it a party at this point.”
Azriel touched the pads of two fingers against Eris’ lips, pushing in just slightly. “Would you like that, fireling? Tired of keeping me a secret yet?” The words were toying, meant to be a jibe, but they twisted under Eris’ skin in a way that made him feel sick, uneasy.
“You know I am.” The teasing went from Azriel’s eyes then. Even in the dark, Eris could see the sincerity in them, feel the stillness of the body held against his own.
“When the timing is better, right?” Eris hated the shame in Azriel’s voice, the way he could tell it hurt the male in front of him as the words almost pulled inward. He wanted to apologize, wanted to tell him fuck them all, that he’d throw on pants and tell the court right now. Claim him the way he deserved and be claimed in return, not relying on the pulses of magic to glamour and heal the lovely marks away from the eyes of Prythian.
But in the wake of his bloodthirsty ascension, there was still unrest in Autumn, despite the allies and support. Beron’s hateful roots had run rampant and deep through the court, causing an evil that needed to be pulled out slowly, and methodically. He needed to prove his worth to the court, needed to show that he was the rightful High Lord. Now was the time for that, and something as serious as declaring Azriel as his mate would not help matters.
But still…
“Azriel.” The male in his arms shuddered near imperceptibly when he whispered his name.
“No, don’t say it. I know. I understand.” Eris knew he did, but the words still hurt. The whole situation did nothing but hurt them both.
Azriel rose to leave, but before he could, Eris’ hand shot out to grip his wrist, the dappled skin beneath it like a touchstone, a comfort. Home.
“Stay?”
Azriel paused, perched on the edge of the bed, as though taking it in. Deciding if he was worth it. Eris tried to pull back from the hurt, knowing it was him who was causing it all in the end. But Azriel was already returning to the bed, pulling close to Eris as he tugged up the sheets.
“Roll over,” he commanded, and Eris did.
He turned to his side, facing the hearth and blowing a small breath of magic into it so that the fire resumed, burning low. Azriel tucked himself against Eris’ back, a wing coming over top of them to cocoon them in and glowing red between Eris and the firelight.
The male’s skin was warm against his back, lining his body from top to bottom and snaking a hand over his waist. Eris’ eyes were already heavy, lids blinking slowly as the warmth and comfort overtook him. Eris knew that Azriel would be gone when he awoke, but he couldn’t fight the comfort of him across his skin.
“Happy Solstice, Eris.” The words were spoken quietly with a press of lips to his shoulder, Eris’ name on his lips the best Solstice gift he could imagine, even if, for now, they could only have the stolen moments.
“Happy Solstice, Azriel.”
As his consciousness faded away from the room, all was quiet and dark, save for the steady, constant thrumming of the glowing thread of gold between their ribs.
Cannot thank @popjunkie42 @witch-and-her-witcher @acourtofladydeath and @missfckingfortune enough for reading things over for me! Love you guys!
#azris#azriel#eris vanserra#azris supremacy#azris fic#azriel x eris#acotar gift exchange#the holiday spirit but azris style#happy holidays new friend!
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New Traditions
“It’s pretty much a tradition by now. A female you want to marry choosing Cassian instead.” Azriel appeared by Eris’ side out of nowhere with the bottle of wine Eris had his eye on. Eris watched the Shadowsinger silently as he poured him another glass of the delicious concoction. “I much rather some other traditions, Spymaster,” Eris said finally.
Day 4 of @erisweekofficial 'Traditions'.
Big thanks to @the-darkestminds for the last-minute beta assist!
#azris fanfiction#azris#eris vanserra#azriel#azris supremacy#azriel x eris#acotar#eris x azriel#azris fic
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Hiiii
I saw your requests are open but feel free to ignore this if it isnt
Oh, Queen of angst
would you please bless us with a story where azriel is engaged but not to Eris
Yes you read that right, but wait hear me out
He is still in love with Eris (no mating bond though just love)
Centuries ago or decades whatver he was forced to end things with Eris because what he thought the IC's reaction was
So he watches Eris longingly at a Highlords meeting and then boom, Eris and his mating bond snaps just like that (prompted or unprompted your choice) And Eris is standing there horrified because azriel broke things off with him and he is still in love with Azriel but he thinks azriel doesnt feel the same
And Azriel standing there shocked but super happy because now no one can say anything about his love for Eris because even the mother belives in it. His fiancee and the rest of the IC are there like 😨 Feel free to ignore this but if you would write this I would be ever so indebted to you 🥺🥺 Okii Thanks 🙏 for reading this far and indulging me
I Could Never Forget You
Azriel is incapable of keeping his eyes to himself and oop... now he's got a mate bond on his hands with Eris who he ended things off with centuries ago. What will they do? - 2k words
Author's Note: Darling anon, I wrote this to the best of my abilities (and actually enjoyed it more than I thought I would so thank you lol). I changed the “Az is super happy” part a tad because I really can’t see them being in anything other than pure shock and horror at the situation even while hope blooms. Hope you enjoy regardless!
I did end things off before we got the IC’s and his fiance’s reactions so if you were especially looking for those, let me know! I can add it in a reblog :) just may take some more thinking
TW: suggestiveness to sexual activities (VERY little but minors beware)
↢ 『 ☾ 』 ↣
It had been centuries and that damned face still made his heart flutter like he was some teenage male. It was infuriating. Maybe even more than infuriating. Azriel glanced over at the female who sat next to him. She smiled back warmly, the Illyrian wings behind her twitching some in his direction.
He forced a smile to curve his lips. His fiance. Gods, it was stupid. She was a great female. So amazing that she was practically the only fae Rhysand went to when he needed something handled in the Illyrian camps. She was strong, powerful, demanding, downright gorgeous objectively, and a little bit vain at points. He didn’t know why he felt so guilty.
Azriel’s gaze traveled back across the table. They were in the Dawn Court for the annual High Lords’ meeting to establish trade and peace. And guess who sat directly across from him?
The one and only Eris Vanserra.
His hair was down, which was rare to see. Normally it was worn in complex braids all up and around in Eris’s hair. But the smug bastard still had that smirk on his face as he glanced over at Azriel.
Eris scoffed and turned his head away which was not helpful because it showed off his neck muscles and those damned ears. As per usual, they were covered in jewelry. Chains and rings and dangly little charms. All of it.
And though he was trying to lie to himself, it did look damn good.
Centuries ago, he’d cut things off with Eris. He had to. His family, especially Mor, would’ve hated him. He was sure of that.
And he had a fiance now for the gods’ sake. Why did the damned bastard still make his palms clammy and his cheeks heat up?
It’s possibly the stupidest thing of all time. Yes, he had once loved Eris. But he had responsibilities and loyalties to his court now.
Even if the bastard was way too attractive for his own good.
Azriel sighed and turned his head to try and pay attention to the actual meeting. Thesan and Kallias were having some sort of conversation over trade while Tarquin was trying to cut in with his own plans. Not fighting per say, but definitely close to arguing as usual at these meetings. Nobody truly got along. It was tolerance at best.
Eris swirled his whiskey around in his glass, taking a small sip from it and smirking at the chaos that was being wrought. Likely, it was whiskey brought from Autumn since Azriel knew he hated any other types of whiskey.
“It just doesn’t burn the same, Az,” He’d argued.
And of course that’s where Azriel’s gaze brought him once again.
His fiance squeezed his hand as if in question and he squeezed back in reassurance. He was fine. He just had to get the redhead out of his mind. (An impossible feat, he might add. Eris had a tendency to effortlessly bring attention to him.)
“Rhys,” Eris suddenly spoke, turning his head away from the arguments beginning. “Was there anything useful you were going to bring to this meeting?”
Rhys sat up a little with Feyre beside him looking exhausted. “Nothing more than news that Hewn City would like to begin trading salt out again.”
Eris’s brows raised in interest. “Salt, you say?” He asked. “Now that’s quite the commodity they’re offering. Shall I talk to Kier?”
“You can manufacture a deal with us,” Feyre spoke up. “We’ll pass it along.”
And here was even more proof that Azriel needed to get Eris off his mind. It would only end poorly.
Eris chuckled softly and hummed in response. “Shall we spar then, Feyre?” He asked. “I’m certain any deals I offer would be more than satisfactory.”
Feyre sighed. “Let’s hear it then,” she replied. Her eyes betrayed her exhaustion, though. Little Nyx was in his teenage phase where he called his own parents and family dumb in order to get independence. Only “Uncle Azzie” was allowed to talk to him now as long as he didn’t bring up anything the little one didn’t want to talk about.
The usual trade talk commenced with bargains going both ways and Azriel found himself just staring at Eris, watching his hair sway slightly when he leaned over the table. He could just imagine pulling it.
“Azriel, do pick up your jaw,” Eris suddenly said, staring directly at him. “I know I’m handsome, but your fiance is sitting right beside you.”
Azriel didn’t even realize his jaw had dropped. He was practically drooling. What the fuck.
And then something happened. He couldn’t describe the feeling well but it felt like something just snapped between him and Eris, yanking him closer to the male. He suddenly felt worry coming down the mysterious thread within his chest.
Then he glanced up at Eris’s furrowed brows.
Azriel took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. Words refused to escape his throat even as hard as he tried.
His fiance rested a hand on his shoulder and he tensed, sitting up immediately.
Rhys seemed to notice now, narrowing his eyes. The daemati knocked on his mind shields and Azriel let them down hesitantly.
What’s wrong? Rhys asked.
He couldn’t respond in words and only pushed the overwhelming feeling towards Rhys’s presence in his mind.
What is it? He asked desperately, hoping, praying that his brother would have the answer this time.
Rhys glanced over at Eris and narrowed his eyes. The other male was also reacting the same way, but he was holding his chest in shock while staring at Azriel.
“Mate,” Eris suddenly breathed in shock.
Azriel’s eyes went wide. That word. It sounded right. Which meant a few things: Eris was his mate. He had a fiance that wasn’t his mate. But he also still very obviously loved Eris despite the centuries. And another thing: his entire family knew. Fuck. How was he supposed to play this off?
“What?” Cassian suddenly asked, leaning over the table. “Did you just say mate?”
“Azriel,” Eris said sharply when he tried to push his chair away from the table to make a run for it.
“What,” he said roughly, his voice scratchy from emotion of some sort. He couldn’t identify it yet. But with Eris’s sharp tone, he also found himself frozen in place.
Rhys had this look on his face. Somewhere between surprise, confusion, and honestly with those furrowed brows, possibly the anger Azriel had been expecting centuries ago when he broke things off with Eris.
His fiance rested a hand on his shoulder again and this time, he flinched violently, letting out a gasp.
“Az,” she tried. “Take a breath,” she commanded.
Azriel’s shadows luckily took pity on his state and rushed up to cover his face while panic creeped up his spine. All conversation had quieted down by now.
“Eris, Azriel,” Rhys began, “let’s go outside for a moment, shall we?”
Azriel pushed himself from his seat at that escape from so many eyes and quickly followed his brother out even as Eris trailed them from behind.
“Azriel, you need to breathe,” Rhys said softly once they were in the hallway alone.
Azriel forced himself to suck in a breath, closing his eyes.
A rush of calm rushed through him suddenly from that string in his chest and his head shot up, shadows falling from his face in shock. It’d been like a jolt to his system to restart and work again.
And Eris was in front of him, tilting his head with concern evident in his facial expression. “Azriel,” Eris began. “Are you alright?”
He let out a sigh before he nodded. “I’m fine,” He managed to get out. He was… not fine, but fine enough for whatever conversation was likely to occur.
Eris scoffed as if he clearly knew it was a lie, but seemed to accept the answer. “Well then, I believe there needs to be a conversation, now doesn’t there?” He prompted.
“Should I let you two handle this?” Rhys asked, raising a brow.
“Go Rhys,” Azriel mumbled. “We’ll handle this. Let my fiance know that I’m fine?” He requested.
Rhys nodded and walked off.
Then he faced Eris and sighed, rubbing his eyes with his forefinger and thumb. “Eris…”
“You want to reject the bond,” Eris finished for him. “It makes sense. You broke things off centuries ago and you have a fiance who loves you. I get it, Az. You don’t care about me.”
Azriel jerked his head back in shock. “I wasn’t going to say that,” He said to Eris, his brows furrowing. He swallowed back his hesitation and sighed. “I do care about you, fireheart.”
Eris’s brows furrowed even more at the pet name. It’d been one of the things that Azriel had called them when they had been dating. It represented his determination, his flames and encompassed part of who he was. Azriel knew he’d gotten the male’s attention with it.
“Then what exactly is your plan, Az?” Eris asked. “You have a fiance.”
Azriel sighed, rubbing his face again as he leaned back against the wall, uncaring of the fact his wings were being partly crushed by the action. “Eris… I didn’t break things off back then because I didn’t want you.”
Eris’s eyes narrowed. “Then why?” He asked calmly.
“My… my family means a lot to me. You know that. I got pathetically scared over their reaction,” Azriel mumbled, a tad ashamed of the fact.
Eris raised a brow, but then he seemed to relax. “So what does being mates mean then?” He asked.
“Maybe it’s proof that I shouldn’t have given up what I loved all those centuries ago,” Azriel admitted, glancing up at Eris timidly.
Eris’s expression softened. “So you were scared?” He repeated. “Are you still scared?”
Azriel paused to think for a moment. Mates were chosen by the Mother. And while he’d met mates that weren’t meant for each other… he also knew how well Eris and he were getting on centuries ago. And though they had changed since then, he doubted it would put a stake through the possibilities of them.
“I can’t be scared if we’ve been chosen by the Mother, Eris. More than half my family knows the significance of the mating bond. I don’t think they’d fault me for trying.”
“And would they fault you if it’s me?” Eris emphasized.
“Going by how Rhys reacts when someone tries to insult Feyre, I don’t think I would physically be able to stop myself if they did try to fault me,” Azriel admitted with a slight chuckle.
Eris rolled his eyes with a smirk. “You do have a fiance, however,” He reiterated. “Are you so certain I’m worth it?”
“I was shocked at first, Eris. But… I want that, Eris. With you. We’d already been planning on how to manage the political situation anyway once you became High Lord. What’s stopping us now?” Azriel asked, a small grin making its way onto his face.
Eris chuckled. “Nothing, I suppose,” he murmured as he took a step closer.
Azriel didn’t try to stop his immediate urge to kiss those lips and practically lunged forward off the wall to grab Eris’s chin and press their lips together.
Eris let out a soft sound of surprise before he melted into it. It was soft. Like coming back home.
It felt like hours before they were forced to pull away to breathe. Azriel panted for a moment, meeting Eris’s gaze.
“You always were a sap,” Eris teased.
Azriel scoffed. “And you aren’t?” He emphasized.
“Oh, I’m unafraid to admit that I am these days,” Eris mused.
For a moment, they just seemed to take the situation in. Then Eris stood up a little straighter. “Speak to your family, Az. Then come find me at the cabin. I think I’m craving a little more than a kiss.”
Azriel scoffed. “Insatiable,” he mused.
“Oh you know I am,” Eris said with a smirk. After a moment, he asked, “Are you really going to end things off with your fiance for me?” There was a little insecurity in that tone.
“Fireheart,” Azriel began. “The only reason I was attracted to her was because she reminded me so much of your spark. She’s become integrated into the family. I think she’d understand. In fact, she might be useful to Rhys while I take a break to deal with the inevitable frenzy.”
Eris scoffed. “And you call me insatiable?” He asked.
“I could never forget you, Eris. You and I are fated.” Azriel replied with a genuine smile.
EXTRA CONTENT: Part 2 w/ reactions of IC and Fiance (only reblogged)
↢ 『 ☾ 』 ↣
A/N: Shh… yes I used “fireheart” as Az’s petname for Eris. IT FIT TOO WELL SHHHHHHHH.
Also, this was not edited. I am lazy. Apologies for any and all mistakes. If I ever reread this, the facepalm I'll give myself is plenty punishment.
Tagged in all ACOTAR Stories: @bunnymallowo, @officiallyunofficialperson, @margssstuff, @rebloggiest-reblogger, @inpraizeof, @graciereads, @eos-princess, @bubybubsters, @fieldofdaisiies, @skyesayshi, @lilah-asteria,
Tagged in all Azriel Stories: @ladylokilaufeyson5, @marina468,
#mywriting#azris#azriel#azriel shadowsinger#azriel acotar#eris vanserra#eris acotar#high lord eris#azris fanfiction#acotar fanfiction#acotar fanfic#acotar fic#azris fic#azris supremacy
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Summary: Azriel travels to Boston to solve a murder case and leaves having experienced Alien dick. Or.... X-files / Roswell, but make it acotar. Happy @azrisweek! (Written for Day 4!)
This fic is explicit for exactly the reasons you think it will be.
READ CHAPTER 1 ON AO3
🛸👽 Let me know if you want me to add/remove you to the tag list for updates.
🏷️ @chunkypossum @acourtofladydeath @pippsmcgee @queercontrarian @cauldronblssd @andrigyn @afandomangel @berryzxx @thoughtfulshepherdmongerkid @honeysuckle-daydreams13 @tsunami-of-tears @jules-writes-stories
#azris#azriel x eris#eris x azriel#eris vanserra#azriel acotar#azrisweek2024#azrisweek24day4#acotar#azris supremacy#azris fanfiction#acotar fanfiction#azriel shadowsinger#eris acotar#pro azris#pro azriel#azriel spymaster#eris vandaddy#pro eris vanserra#high lord eris#autumn court#acotar fanfic#azris fic#azriel angst#eris smut#azriel smut#acotar smut#stt writes
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Purely Professional
Business!Man Eris x IT!Guy Azriel
Summary: Just fix the security system in another rich guys office. That's all Azriel had to do. Surely everything stays professional between him and Wall Streets poster boy, Eris Vanserra... right?
word count: 1k
cw: nothing yet 👀🍵
Azriel had never been one to waste time on frivolous tasks. His work, which kept him grounded in the world of technical fixes and system repairs, had always been straightforward.
That was until he’d walked into Eris Vanserra’s office.
The first time he met Eris, Azriel had been tasked with fixing a malfunctioning security system at Vanserra Enterprises.
The building itself was a towering example of wealth and arrogance, a glittering monument to a man who seemed to have everything—money, power, and a complete lack of humility.
Azriel had no interest in the people behind such establishments. He was just the repair guy. But Eris… Eris made it difficult to remember that.
Eris leaned back in his office chair, legs stretched out, his expensive suit clinging to his form in a way that suggested he never did anything without precision. His eyes, sharp as daggers, watched Azriel as if he were the most amusing thing in the room. Which, in some strange way, Azriel had become.
“So, you’re the IT guy, huh?” Eris’ voice dripped with an amused curiosity. “I expected someone... less intimidating. More... suited to the task.”
Azriel’s brow furrowed as he set to work on the security panel. He tried not to react to the sly edge in Eris’s tone, though it was hard to ignore the way the man’s gaze seemed to burn through him.
“I’m here to fix the security system. That’s all.” Azriel muttered, keeping his focus on the complicated wires and connections before him.
He didn’t need to engage in Eris’s games.
Eris smirked, leaning forward, his elbows on his desk as he observed Azriel with a deliberate, calculating stare.
“Oh, I’m sure you’re very good at fixing things. You look like you are, at least. But the real question is—how good are you at dealing with people?”
Azriel felt a rush of irritation. He had a way with people. But Eris… Eris had a way of twisting that irritation into something else entirely.
“I don’t deal with people. I deal with machines,” Azriel replied, voice sharp.
Eris leaned in closer, and for a moment, Azriel thought he could feel the heat of the man’s presence pressing into him. His smirk widened as he observed Azriel’s concentration, a glint of mischief in his eyes.
“Well, I’m sure you’d rather hide behind your precious wires than with someone who’s... above your station.”
The last part of that sentence was laced with something dangerous. Something that made Azriel’s heart skip a beat. Eris spoke with such cocky confidence, as though he owned the world—yet there was an undeniable charm beneath the arrogance that, despite Azriel’s best efforts, kept pulling him in.
Azriel’s fingers brushed against the panel’s delicate wiring, his thoughts momentarily clouded as Eris’ words echoed in his mind. He took a deep breath, trying to clear his head.
“I’m not interested in your station, Eris. Im just here to fix the damn security system.” Azriel muttered, his voice hushed but tense, hoping the man would take the hint.
Eris chuckled, the sound rich and velvety.
“You don’t fool me, Azriel. You don’t get all tense and flustered when you don’t care.”
Azriel couldn’t help but glance up, meeting Eris’s sharp gaze.
There it was again— that sly, knowing look that made Azriel feel like he was being sized up and analyzed in ways he couldn’t quite understand.
“I’m not flustered,” Azriel snapped, though it was a lie.
His pulse had quickened, his body reacting to the subtle but persistent way Eris kept pushing his buttons.
Eris raised an eyebrow, clearly enjoying the effect he was having.
“Really? Then explain why your jaw tightens every time I speak. Or is it that your 'business' mind is just too... innocent to grasp the intricacies of a real businessman?” His voice dipped lower, a teasing undertone lacing his words.
Azriel could feel the heat rising in his chest, the words that Eris had spoken weaving a strange tension between them.
It was frustrating, because the more Eris acted like this—cocky, charming, and infuriating—the harder it was for Azriel to ignore the way his body reacted. It was like Eris knew exactly how to touch on all his weaknesses. He didn’t just get under Azriel’s skin—he enjoyed it.
“I’m not innocent,” Azriel replied, forcing the words out, trying to control the way his breath came faster. “And I don’t care about your business.”
Eris leaned in closer, his voice soft yet cutting.
“I think you care a lot more than you’d like to admit. But you’ll never tell me, will you? Because you're not the type to share anything. Just keep your distance, don’t you?”
Azriel’s heart pounded. Eris was right. He wanted to keep his distance. But Eris—Eris had a way of making the distance feel impossibly small.
“Do you ever get tired of talking down to people?” Azriel finally asked, his voice surprisingly steady despite the way his mind was whirling.
He didn’t expect Eris to back off, but there was something about this power struggle that was only fueling the fire inside him.
Eris stood, towering over Azriel now. He ran a hand through his rubied russet hair, his smirk never fading.
“I don’t talk down to people, Azriel. I simply elevate myself.” His voice dropped even lower, an intimate challenge in his tone. “If you want, I can show you how it feels to be in the same... elevated position.”
Azriel’s body clenched, every muscle reacting to Eris's proximity, his words. The tension was almost unbearable. It was clear—Eris was playing a game, and Azriel didn’t know how much longer he could pretend he wasn’t interested in playing along.
The moment stretched between them, charged with an undeniable energy. Azriel didn’t want to admit it, but he was dangerously close to falling into the web Eris had spun so effortlessly.
“Well, repairman,” Eris whispered, his breath hot against Azriel’s ear, “maybe you’ll find that sometimes, it’s not just the machines that need fixing.”
Azriel swallowed, hands trembling slightly as he completed his work. He didn’t look at Eris, didn’t speak, but the ache in his chest and the heat flooding his veins were impossible to ignore.
🖤 Azriel ❤️🔥Eris ✨️General
@chunkypossum @honeysuckle-daydreams13 @ysmtttty @nessiandefenseattorney @nocasdatsgay @secret-third-thing @azysmate @yennas-stuff @a-courtof-azriel @batboyrhyrhy @lilah-asteria @velarisnightsky444 @christeareads @thestarlightexpress @viktoriaashleyyx @invaderdreyar
#azris supremacy#azriel x eris#azris#azriel shadowsinger#azriel#eris vanserra#eris vandaddy#azris au#azris fic#a court of thorns and roses#acotar#flirty
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I wasn't going to share this. I was going to squirrel it away in my den of fear BUT then I saw the @hurtcember prompt list and so now I'm saying fuck it. Happy Hurtcember my wicked little whump loving Azris freaks.
First time I'm using my tag list in MONTHS. If you find you don't want to be there anymore just lmk!
Holla at ya boi if you want on or off the Azris tag train : @talibunny30 @iftheshoef1tz @born-to-riot @fieldofdaisiies @aktrain @honeysuckle-daydreams13 @secret-third-thing @acourtofladydeath @pippsmcgee @youvereachedthenearest-lovergirl @baileybird71 @skyesayshi @yanny-77 @areyoudreaminof @unanswered-stars @futurehunt @ninthcircleofprythian @matrixsss @going-through-shit @c-starstuff-man0 @jules-writes-stories @the-darkestminds @krowiathemythologynerd @cauldronblssd @hieragalbatorixdottir @yourlazykitkat @hellolordling @climbthemountain2020 @lilah-asteria @shadowsandlint @acourtofbatboydreams @theeternalstruggle @christeareads @molcat07 @mistandmemories @neciebee @dusk-muse @chairofchaos @amalhe-kofee inspo under the cut: 𝑆𝑖𝑔𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑢𝑚, Robert Ferri
#azris#hurtcember2024#collapse#azris supremacy#eris vanserra#acotar#azriel x eris#azris fanfiction#acotar fanfiction#azriel shadowsinger#eris acotar#azriel acotar#azris fanart#pro azris#azris fic#azris angst#azris intensifies#acotar fanart#azriel spymaster#azriel angst#eris angst#eris art#azriel fanart#eris fanart#whump
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Chapter 79
“ Azriel paused, a smirk sweeping across his face as he watched Cassian take a bite of his dinner. He fought to suppress his laughter, breaking when Cassian began to cough and drain his glass of water. “Why the fuck is this so hot!”
Azriel would have fallen from his chair if Eris' hand did not rest on his side. Eris could not suppress his small chuckle, “it is Equinox tradition.”
Feyre nodded, slowly taking a small bite. “It’s spicy, yes but still it tastes incredible.”
Eris nodded, “I appreciate your ability to handle our food….”
“….. Rhysand took a small bite of his own, quickly turning towards Eris. “How do your people eat this?”
Eris smiled, “we are given spices as children. We have built up a tolerance and enjoyment of it over the years. We grow the peppers here beneath the Forest House for the entire court.”
“Can we have some for the Night Court?” Feyre turned towards Rhysand.
Cassian quickly shook his head, “No.”
I could not stop laughing while writing this scene. I didn‘'’t know what it would take with readers, but I am so glad that I was able to give the Autumn Court its own traditions and celebrations. When I commissioned the amazing @jmoonjones, I told her she would have free reign of any scene she wanted. When she picked this scene, I was honestly surprised but even more shocked by how amazing she did. I knew her talent, but this blew me away. I am so thankful for her beautiful artwork, and she did the characters justice. In the picture from left to right, we have Feyre, Everett, Eris, Azriel, Cassian, Rhysand, and Brenton. Two of these characters are semi-cannon characters, Eris' brothers. But I can’t thank her enough for this amazing artwork. Please go support her on Tumblr and Instagram. She does incredible artwork! Thank you so much, JmoonJones.
Characters belong to Sarah J Maas
#azriel#azris#azris fanfiction#azris fic#eris acotar#eris vanserra#azriel x eris#azris fanart#azrisweek2024#azris supremacy#azriel acotar
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Remind Me Where The Light Is
CHUNKY!!!!! IT’S ME!!!! YOUR SANTA!!!! ARE YOU SURPRISED??!! I BET YOU ARE! Lol 🤪🎅❤️
Fun santa fact: that last message was intended to be sent late at night, perhaps after you’d already fallen asleep. Finger slipped. Fumbled right before the end zone. Tragic. Sloppy. Humiliating (okay not really lol). I hope I didn’t spoil your fun, though. Did you enjoy my attempts to lead you astray? (Did they work??? 🤣) Forgive me. ANYWAY. It is time.
BEHOLD! YOUR GIFT.
READ ON AO3
azris | (1/8?) | WIP
Summary: Two years after the Autumn Court’s defection to the Loyalist cause, Azriel of Illyria is sent on a dangerous mission under orders from the High Lord of Night. His objective: meet with a secret contact within Hybern’s ranks and secure critical intel to shift the tide of war. What Azriel doesn't anticipate is the contact's true identity—Eris Vanserra, his sworn nemesis and Heir to an enemy Court.
Bound by duty and forced into an uneasy alliance, Azriel and Eris must navigate the deadly politics of war while grappling with the unexpected passion simmering between them.
Can love endure in a world determined to tear it apart?
________________________________________________
I had so much fun being your Santa!! Thank you for being a wonderful giftee! I hope you enjoy your present. I plan to drop chapter 2 on Thursday, and hopefully wrap this fic up within the next few weeks! (We shall see). 🖤🖤🖤🖤
@chunkypossum @acotargiftexchange
#azris#azriel x eris#eris x azriel#eris vanserra#added wings to a photo I found on Pinterest btw lol#eris acotar#azriel#azriel acotar#azriel shadowsinger#acotar#pro azris#acotar gift exchange 2024#sjm#eris vandaddy#azris fanfiction#azris supremacy#azris fic#azris intensifies#lol
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"The Beholder" Azris Oneshot
Pairing: Azriel/Eris Vanserra
Word Count: 36,304
AO3 link
Description: Azriel and Eris both think the other is beyond gorgeous. The pinnacle of walking, talking perfection, the most attractive faerie to grace Prythian with their presence. After all, they say beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The only problem is, they spend too much time hating each other to actually do anything about it.
Hello hello Azris nation, guess who just posted his ridiculously long Azris slowburn oneshot that's literally just about how hot Azriel and Eris think the other is?
It's me, and I have the AO3 link and a preview here for your perusal! The fic does venture into some mature territory and does contain eventual smut, but I wasn't really sure what to rate it, so just consider this your warning. You can check it out using the link above or read the preview below!
It was almost ironic, Azriel thought, how easily he fell. Not in love, really. But something close to it. A winged beast somehow prone to tripping into endless depths of desires that could never be fulfilled. He was a spymaster and a torturer, and yet the minute he became fixated on someone, it became this prolonged, festering thing. Like a wound that refused to heal. He was forged to withstand the brutality of war, condemned to thrive in darkness, a being of sharp blades and black shadows. Yet the moment he grew attracted to someone, he felt like it was a physical, ever-burning brand that could be seen by all. A bright beacon of obvious weakness.
He loved his family, of course. He loved Mor in a different way for a very long time. He still wasn't entirely sure where she stood in his heart. But love was something that formed in him over the course of years, centuries. He was not worried about love. It was a diamond at his center, unbreakable, coated in layers upon layers of impenetrable steel. He no longer heard echoes of that incessant mantra pounded into his head for the first eleven years of his life. You are not worthy of having anything to love.
Now, his love was a well-guarded choice. A distinct investment he made into those he cared about the most. It was simple, and strong, and he had forty nine years of throwing himself against Rhysand's protective wall of magic to prove it. He had hundreds of years of stepping back into the shadows while Mor invited strangers to her bed to prove it. She was…confusing, in that way. But his love for her was not.
So no, he did not worry about love. This wasn't about love. It was about attraction. Infatuation, being enamored, having desire. A certain kind that went beyond his basic instincts to get carnal relief.
That was the true weakness, what he felt was on display for everyone to see. That's what he always fell so easily into, wings ablaze the whole way down. The feeling of finding a missing piece of his soul, and the need to make it his own again. Yes, love could come of it. In theory. He supposed that's what happened with Mor. He first desired her like she was a part of himself that he'd lost, or that had been ripped away from him. Then she became one of the few people he allowed himself to love, and he fell into it as gracelessly as he fell into his initial infatuation with her. But his love and desire for her were often inseparable, a blurred mess of too-bright colors that didn't quite fit in with his shadowed life. His love kept him tethered to her, even when she pulled further and further away, even when his desire was almost completely obscured by mere obsession.
He didn't know how to love anyone else for a very long time after that.
And then along came Elain Archeron, emerging from her cocoon of bleak listlessness bit by bit every day. Every once in a while, in her fleeting moments of presence, he felt that spark of aching want, of all consuming need. It was small, but it was there. The glimmer of hope that perhaps Mor was not the end for him. That maybe one day he could love someone else the same way. But Elain was still so new to being Fae, still so lost to a world that she had never meant to be thrust into, like a flower waiting for the right time to bloom. So as soon as his hope flickered to life when he felt that desire, it was smothered until there was nothing left but bitter, sinking shame.
It wasn't as if he'd ever deserve her love in return, anyway. Not from someone so pure as Elain, her skin kissed by dew drops, her fawn-soft eyes seeming to beg for safety. He would never give her what she needed, and she would never give him what he deserved. Not when she couldn't know him, what he was, what he did. She was too pliant, too bendable, and he suspected that she had too much love in her soul for him to take on. But it was never about what he could get in return. It was just always nice, in those fleeting moments of hope, to think that one day he could give that love to someone other than the female who'd been denying it for five hundred years.
But love was easy to put aside when he was hit with these waves of incessant need. White-hot desire that left him feeling unstable and empty. Something much more urgent than just an itch in need of scratching, but something much less committed and unbreakable than love. With love, he just wanted someone to be there to accept it. With desire, he wanted to take. There was a certain lack of control over it that he particularly despised. Not just the fact that he always felt completely and utterly seen when it happened, but that he couldn't do anything about it...or who it happened with.
It felt like a cruel trick when he felt that simmering fire of attraction burn along his veins at the meeting of the High Lords, of all places.
Because who would ever want to desire the person they hated most?
#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#azris#azris fanfiction#my fanfiction#my fanfic#my fic#my writing#azris fanfic#azris fic#azris oneshot#azriel fanfiction#eris vanserra fanfiction#azriel shadowsinger#azriel spymaster#azriel x eris#azriel acotar#eris acotar#a court of silver flames#a court of wings and ruin
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Just Enough Light to Cast Shadows on AO3
Azriel x Eris
This is a love letter to Eris Vanserra, and to the Azris corner of the fandom. (Look for cameos and tributes to just a few of my favorite Azris writers.)
Eris Vanserra has been plotting to overthrow his father for years. But when Beron’s removal becomes a matter of life and death, he allies with the Day Court. In his desperate quest, Eris unearths secrets that could change the course of Autumn Court history, if not all of Prythian's, even as his mating bond pulls him towards a male who will only ever see him as a cruel prince.
Meanwhile, Rhysand becomes suspicious of his sly Autumn ally and his activities in Day, and orders his spymaster to watch Eris. But the more time Azriel spends with the Autumn male, the more drawn he is to Eris’s cause.
When faced with an impossible choice, will Azriel take Eris at his word, or fulfill his duty as Night’s brutal enforcer? And where will this leave the Autumn prince and his court?
Chapters 1-20 on AO3
#azris#azriel x eris#azris supremacy#fanfic#azriel#eris vanserra#azris fanfic#acotar#acotar fanfiction#erisx azriel#azris angst#azris fanfiction#acotar fandom#pro eris vanserra#azriel shadowsinger#pro azriel#pro azris#azris fic
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