#Autism or ADHD they claim they aren't real women

[thousandyearphantombunker]

radical feminism is inherently ableist. More so with terfs but it's baked in there no matter what it seems. From bullying men with mental health issues claiming women with hormonal issues aren't real women to claiming that mental illness is inherently super political and not just your brain being fucked up or claiming mass hysteria isn't a real mental illness or that men who have mental health issues are dangerous spoiled man children or that we're only mentally ill/disabled because capitalism and how the world won't accommodate to us and that capitalism is a result of the patriarchy and how proudly many radical feminists say they are proud to be bullies...

'if men suffer in silence why am I always hearing about it? they must either be over sensitive man babies or lying it must be a trend' or the even worse 'he probably deserved it' or anything along the lines of 'if you dealt with it for years why am I just hearing about it now'

I heard similar things about the 'me too' movement when women said they had faced sexual harassment or even got raped- its wrong either way. Women suffered in silence for years when it came to sexual misconduct because they feared how people reacted and many of them are still suffering because of those bad reactions. Disabled mentally ill or just down on their luck men suffered in silence for years because of similar reactions. Men aren't babied like you think they are, I saw how you reacted to the good doctor meltdown scene, I saw you guys claim the move Joker was gonna cause incels to rape women and cause riots. Your hatred of men and your ableism is astounding- when you hear a man is struggling with mental health issues and your immediate reaction is to belittle him and call him man child or creepy or that he's being too sensitive or become afraid of him- your parroting the same bullshit assholes said at the height of the 'me too' movement. 'its different when we do it! We're oppressed so it's okay and no longer counts as victim blaming or abusive!'- fuck off with that you guys are targeting men with mental health issues. You guys have the exact same mentality of 'grow a thicker skin' it's gross. Next you'll be saying 'pull yourself up from your bootstraps' and 'back when I was a kid I had to walk 20 miles to school'

'well we woman have repressed our anger for years and have dealt with all kinds of crap because of men! They keep talking about male loneliness but women are lonely too! Those men probably just want the right to rape women! They have no clue how much we have to deal with them and what a massive burden they are to us!"

I hear similar things when a disabled person talks about how we face genuinely traumatizing amounts of abuse and dehumanization or about how people purposely infantalize us to control and humiliate us or how we get discriminated against when we seek help - I'm gonna say it- as a disabled person I think we genuinely get the most shit regardless of gender- whether or not you think disabled men or women have it harder disabled people have to deal with so much shit- but we don't advocate for fucking violence against doctors or teachers or caretakers or able bodied neurotypical people! Y'all sound like your in a cult the same way Andrew Tate fans sound like they're in a cult.

Misogyny and misandry and the extremist paranoid transphobia especially transphobia against trans women are really the different sides of the same coin

Also if you say anyone deserves to be domestically abused yes that includes tradwives or women who have genuinely shit ass opinions then your beyond saving

Your not a feminist your a dick who thinks being a dick is a good thing

Radfems are inherently fucking ableist - I'm a women most radical feminist spaces yes even the ones that claim to be anti-terf make me uncomfortable because of this shit- y'all can say 'disabled women are still women' while attacking the shit out of the disabled community for pointing out you exclude them constantly! Or claim that we're only counted as a disabled because of 'the patriarchy and capitalism'

'being a misandrist is different from being a misogynist' okay so your a misandrist because you want women to feel safe, you want to fight against rape and having your bodily autonomy stolen from you

What part of that entails verbal abuse toward men? Or claiming tradwives deserve to get raped?

'oh well you see I'm fighting against our oppressors' by attacking them online and calling them over sensitive babies when they get emotional about it because talking about mental illness is hard? Also why are you victim blaming women who chose to be tradwives? Your misandry will always become racism misogyny ableism and transphobia

'if they get to whine about x issue as men then I get to bully them because they have no idea what we go through! And we're making sure they can't take a break from our problems!'

Whether or not you think we have a male suicide epidemic or a men's mental health crisis or think that women have it harder when it comes to ableism and mental health stigma your reaction to someone opening up about their issues should never be bullying.

I don't like JKR she's shitty and transphobic as hell from what I've heard- though I'll admit I never really looked into her actions too deeply so I don't know the full extent of her actions but I've heard y'all say shit like 'she deserved to be abused by her ex' and that shit is foul that is the most terf-energy shit I've heard. Y'all terfs don't just suck cause they hate trans people (that's a huge reason why they suck but it's not the only reason) but it's also because they police womanhood and claim women who don't fit what their definition of womanhood entails deserves to be hurt- if your anti transphobia but claim all tomboys are just self-deluded into internalized misogyny and their masculine traits are bad- your still an asshole. I guess your an anti transphobia asshole which is better than a transphobic asshole but still your gross

If you claim women who want to be stay at home mothers are traitors your an asshole

'you can't want feminine things because that's the patriarchy forcing you into a role that's inherently shameful but also liking masculine things is bad because that's the patriarchy making you hate yourself but we're also we're gonna bully you for not being feminine enough despite the we said liking girly stuff this the patriarchy talking and the fact that your masculine traits are result of health issues where still gonna antagonize you'

Radfems police womanhood and claim every woman they don't like from butches to tomboys and traditional feminine traditional women are upholding the patriarchy and have internalized misogyny and that only by fitting their definition of womanhood and their stupid standards and again a lot of their standards ableist

I hate terfs cause their transphobic yes but I also hate them and trans inclusionist radfems because of how they bully women who have health problems traditionally associated with men or bully women who have health problems that masculinize them and claim 'there not real women', how they bully disabled men, how they keep screaming that the 'not like other girls' mentality is bad while promoting it, saying women who aren't to their personal liking deserve the bad treatment they get from men (y'all isn't feminism supposed to be for everyone? Or something? But oh wait she said something bigoted so I guess she deserves death)

If your anti terf mentality stops at 'transphobia is bad' but still includes policing other women and attacking people over stigmatized disabilities

Your still being shitty. Your slightly less shitty but still shitty

Argue that ableism and mental health stigma effects women more than men, argue that the tradwife lifestyle can be dangerous

Don't be verbally abusive

Don't claim men are crying wolf about their suffering

Don't victim blame anyone ever. That includes tradwives and the men you claim are lying about their mental illness

Include disabled women in your feminism.

Include fat, anorexic, too tall, too hairy women in your feminism

Don't say shit like "Men are lonely? What what crybabies, they fucking should be." Or claim that "trusting men in even the smallest capacity is inherently dangerous and helping them will only hurt women" and then get shocked when people don't like the implication they are monsters

also again both of those lines are steeped in ableism and racism

If you hate men and wish their deaths you are not a feminist

If you dont believe everyone regardless of gender should be equal you are not a feminist

If you declare yourself a "proud misandrist" you are not a feminist

If you dont believe that patriarchy hurts men and boys too you are not a feminist

If you dont respect housewifes or stay at home mothers you are not a feminist

If you feel threatened by the mere existence of trans people you are not a feminist

[sayitwithsarcophilus]

I think "should the writers be given credit for this subtext/coding/ambiguous or open-to-interpretation representation" is often not a productive means of media criticism, because I don't think most creators of media for adults care all that much about getting Representation Credit. If they're earnest sorts, they may care about things like "will this genderfluid shapeshifter character be relatable to gender-diverse audience members?" or "how might this character affect cis audience members' views of genderfluid people?" but probably not "does this character count as Real Genderfluid Representation if they can shapechange?"

(And in my experience, with edgier media, you may be more likely to get creators claiming their heavily-coded characters aren't intended to represent any minority group, either to defend against perceptions of bigotry ("Silence of the Lambs doesn't demonize trans women because Buffalo Bill isn't really trans") or to give themselves more room to maneuver (you can't be accused of inaccurate representations of autism/adhd/bipolar disorder/etc if your modern-day Sherlock Holmes homage has no official diagnosis.))

[gunsli-01]

Gotta be real I've been having a crap time for a minute now. From being harassed by a psychiatrist (for literal months) to everything that happened over the past nine years. Like I can only name a handful of good things that have occurred but there's been good things. I won't be discussing them here to not ramble. Just want to say Trevor Noah's shout out to black women saying if you want to know what America is like talk to black women cause they don't have the leisure to fuck around and find out is very accurate.

This year and every year I've wanted something that my Healthcare rightfully should and luckily eventually after several years of searching did turn out to cover testing for autism. Then went under months of testing from a black female psychiatrist. Something a lot of people online say is that finding a psychiatrist similar to you is fulfilling and i know a lot of people don't want to hear this but it was not. I didn't fuck around and find out at every angle where I saw an abuse of power I noted it. When this psychiatrist withheld my diagnosis forms from me despite testing being complete I noted it, when she angrily started editing my disgnosis forms on her computer cause she thought I was being uppity I noted it. If I had issues I made sure I had a detailed record of them and kept everything related to going there. I did not fuck around and find out and I'm happy for the experiences in my life that told me not to. Because if I did fuck around and find out I very well could've been institutionalized over a disagreement with a power hungry ableist psychiatrist.

If and when I go ableism is a problem I'm not saying it from a distance. I'm saying it as someone who grew up with asthma who kept trying to figure out if they had autism until they did. Then immediately after discovering they had it and adhd yep we're triple a in here now apparently. Was immediately considered a child despite being an adult and as though my personal statements on any issue concerning my life were unimportant, harassed, belittled, and infantalized for months as someone refused to give me documentation I needed to leave the situation. Then after I got that and left this psychiatrist tried to send the police to my home by fabricating a state of emergency and claiming I was suicidal so they would technically have the right to. That's the type of shit that can happen when black women fuck around and find out. I've told family about this and reactions have been very telling it's not that's horrible it's oh of course well you should've figured that would happen, that's how it always is, at least you know what this field is actually like now.

I'm far from thinking that mental health isn't important or something that should be sought after. Simply because it's proveably true that it is important and a necessity that everyone should have access to and feel safe accessing. I'm just stating that for some people even those sorts of places aren't safe. I thought it was for me and through experience I now know it isn't. I now know that at the end of the day the luxury to fuck around and find out isn't one I ever had. The only reason I'm here right now is because I did not fuck around and find out. Even when extending the benefit of the doubt I kept a record of these things. I looked into how to report this behavior if it came down to that which it obviously did. I made back up plans for back up plans even going as far as to get a telehealth therapist at the same time as pursuing testing with this person in case things did not work out with one of them and if it didn't work with either of them down the road I would simply leave.

That's the type of mentality you get when you know you don't have the option to fuck around and find out without it severely negatively impacting or ending your life. People might say why were you so paranoid about getting therapy and testing but I know if I wasn't I would simply no longer be here to the capacity I am right now and that's the problem not how I chose to cope with it.

[rjalker]

People really need to fucking stop with the "I'm [a member of an oppressed minority] and I like [an extremely bigoted media or celebrity], so that means any criticism of the bigotry in this media or by this celebrity is /actually/ bigotry towards the oppressed group I'm apart of!

Autistic/ADHD people claiming they just can't stop giving JK Rowling money because The Autism/ADHD Made Them Do It™ who say that calling out the racism, antisemitism, fatphobia, misogyny, classism, and other forms of blatant bigotry that are baked into the books means you're ableist and hate neurodivergent people.

White women claiming that criticizing the racism and misogyny in the Twilight books means you hate women.

Trans women who are Steven Moffat stans claiming that criticizing Moffat's blatant decades long career of misogyny and transphobia and racism and general queerphobia means you're either a TERF or "falling for a TERF misinformation campaign".

Dream SMP stans claiming that anyone who doesn't want fans of the racist, ableist, antisemitic literal millionaire Trump supporter who's friends with Nazis interacting with their posts is the real ableist and racist because they /happen to be neurodivergent and some of them aren't white/.

Being apart of an oppressed group does not mean any media or celebrities you worship are also in that fucking oppressed group, people. Someone calling out your favorite shitty celebrity for bigotry does not mean they're being bigoted towards you.