#Attack on titan fics
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morphids · 2 months ago
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false pretenses, hange zoë
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so im absolutely obsessed with this thank you for putting this idea in my head😰😵‍💫wish i could tag u anon </3
original request here [X]
pairing: college au - engineering student!hange x student!female reader - they/them pronouns for hange, afab anatomy for both
summary: the best way to get what you want is to do it yourself right?
warnings: listen this is real slutty ok, explicit sexual content 18+ minors dni - loser lesbian!hange (hange has that autistic nerd rizz), its always the quiet ones, r thinks she’s slick af, poc friendly- no physical descriptions of reader, kinda-bratty/switch!reader (r gets v subby) top-leaning!Hange (im a top i swear), strap, dirty talk, nicknames, munch activities, fingering, finger sucking, cunnilingus, praise, brief asphyxiation, i cant think of anymore
wc: 4.9k (not proofread)
an: excuse the shitty engineering attempts im not a stem girl!! hope y’all enjoy <3
You watched Hange from across the library, gazing over their features as they frowned. Brow creased as they solved equations that your professor had so kindly left everyone to complete after your seminar. Sometimes you’d catch their teeth nip at their bottom lip, in pensive thought.
Hange wasn't around many people, not that you saw anyway, usually kept to themselves or with the same two friends you'd seen them with. Their head often deep into a book or back hunching over a desk working some form of assignment, headphones placed over their hair.
Looking over their face, you studied Hange's strong jaw, the way their slender hand held up the weight of their head as the other scribbled down notes into their notebook. The sluttiest black tank top layered underneath an unbuttoned white dress shirt, draping over baggy brown straight-leg pants. Hair up with so many layers resting against their cheeks, framing their lovely face as multiple strands plumed out from within the hair tie. Their amber eyes lay under small, thin, glasses atop their nose. God, that nose. Perfect to sit on. Perfect to ride to holy heaven.
If it wasn’t clear, you'd had a bit of an eye on Hange for the last semester, they had transferred from a different university a while back. Upon seeing them for the first time, you wanted to speak to them. Their slightly introverted nature had made you keep your distance, though, but it was getting harder to fight the urge to go talk to them. I mean, how weird would that be? Hi, I know you don't know me but I've been obsessed with you since you transferred here? Yeah right.
No, you had to be more creative than that.
You needed a valid reason to speak to Hange so that you didn’t come across as the world’s biggest creep. Luckily for you, Hange was by far the smartest person on campus. Grades always incredibly well above average, scoring top marks in every assignment they’d submitted. So much so, that the professor had pretty much already taken them in under his wing. Due to their helpful nature and extensive knowledge in a fair range of fields, your professor was preparing Hange to be his TA after graduation. Oftentimes, passing Hange over to tutor students in his classes that lacked the grades that were expected of them at this stage in the course.
And even more luckily for you, you seemed to be really struggling with the new module. Or at least that’s what your alibi was. Who needed to know that your grades had actually been consistent passes? You were pretty strong at your theory, but you had only slightly slacked off in your classes during your professors teachings of mathematical methods and linear equations. It couldn’t hurt to get a bit of extra assistance to fill in the missing gaps.
Deciding to bite the bullet, you walked up to Hange, they barely noticed a presence beside, music blaring through the headphones, until your shoes came into their peripheral vision, spotting the black boots right beside the chair.
Their gaze followed up your bare legs, eyes slightly widened as they realised you were indeed about to induce a conversation with them and not just wandering past to get to an actual destination. They removed one cup of their headphones off their ear, holding it up with their fingers so they could listen to you. You noticed the multiple bands resting above their knuckles, bulky metallic rings varied with different patterns and weldings.
“Oh, um— hi?” Hange spoke, slightly confused, they had been deeply distracted into their equations, not anticipating someone coming to speak to them. Definitely not you, of all people.
“Hey, um— sorry to ruin your flow, but I was wondering if you could,” hesitance struck you, feeling your carefully planned script fall apart under Hange’s gaze, eyes still wide and nodding their head as a prompt for you to finish, removing the headphones fully to rest the band on the back of their neck. Why are they so hot, you thought, fumbling over yourself. “If you could tutor me with this module, you’re the smartest person in this place according to Mr. Fritz,” You joked, softening your words with a meek giggle. An attempt to make not make it seem like a big deal even though you could feel your heartbeat thump in your ears and throat.
“You can totally say no, of course,” you quickly added, after realising you didn’t actually offer them an out, not wanting to pressure Hange into having more on their plate than there already was.
Hange’s eyebrows pulled together, lips split as a wash of suspicious perplexity strained their features, only for a second before returning to normal. Back to their friendly warmth with an amiable smile stretched on their lips.
“Sure, I’d love to help,” Their eyes held yours, you to let out a faint breath of relief. “I’ve got a few things to do on campus for a while, but, I can meet you after?”
“That’d be great, thank you!” You offered to exchange phone numbers for ‘easier communication’ to plan around Hange’s schedule, before duly proposing that they come over to your dorm, as the library closed after five o’clock, and your roommates were gone for a week-long field trip.
“I’ll let you know when I’m on the way, then,” They smiled, an amused smirk etching itself on their lips before they could help it.
“That’s perfect, I appreciate it,” You beamed, “I’ll, um, leave you to your equations,” You stepped away, turning around to make your exit from the library. Hange didn’t miss the way your eyes fell onto their lips for just, perhaps, a little bit too long than was deemed socially conventional, or the way you seemed to grow flustered as they stimmed with their fingers. Hange’s gaze followed you as you walked on, trailing down to your exposed legs underneath a short skirt that hung over thick, sinuous thighs. Hange looked back down at their notebook, as they chuckled, shaking their head with endearment at your crafty deceit.
Hange certainly isn’t stupid, due to their proximity working with the professor, they were painfully aware of the more… problematic students in Mr. Fritz’ class. You were never one of them. In fact, he had even used some of your past assignments as example guidelines for the newer students. Needing help with the easiest part of the module? No way were they believing that.
A knock at your door, and you smoothened the fabric of your clothes, hoping to reduce any lingering creases or maybe even just to calm your nerves. You had tidied up, making your bedroom look more presentable and less like a cove of disordered chaos.
Opening the door, there stood Hange, handsome and ravishing in all their tall glory. A hand reached up to stabilise the one strap of their backpack that hung on their shoulder, the other strap dangling behind. You tried to stop, you really did, but you trailed over their figure, lured into their nonchalant stance that just exuded casual confidence as they looked back at you, an eyebrow cocked up.
Breaking contact, you welcomed them in, Hange dropped their backpack onto the floor to relieve the weight of all the heavy textbooks from their shoulders. Hand raising back up to remove the headphones from their neck, placing them atop their bag, hooked on the top handle.
You sat at your couch, leaving enough space for Hange to comfortably place themselves on. Trying to be discreet, you watched as they took off their dress shirt, hanging it on the arm of the couch, you presumed Hange was using the layer against the slightly cooler breeze outside— you couldn’t lie, you were kinda glad to see it off. Hange’s bicep was well sculpted against their black tank top as it melted into toned forearms. Tanned and strong. There was a brown cord bracelet dangling from their wrist as they rested it on their propped up knee. God, I’m no better than a man, you thought.
“So, what’d you need help with?” Hange pushed up their glasses with their ringed index finger, you wondered if that was something they often did subconsciously before beginning a task.
“Linear algebra and probability theory,”
“Hmm,” Hange nodded, a short tug at the corner of their lips, leaning their elbows on the top of their thighs, “Yeah, that stuff is pretty hard, but,”
“What did you score on the last exam?” Hange turned their head your way, amber eyes meeting yours, with a devious look.
You froze, shit. It felt like a trick question, surely Hange didn’t know the score you totalled? Surely, Hange didn’t know that you were just seven marks from a full score? It almost felt as if they were luring you into a trap; to see if you’d double down with the lie and continue with this facade or if you’d crack and admit defeat. Lose-lose either way, you’d end up embarrassed or having to make yourself look incredibly foolish.
Voice breaking in your throat, you held eye contact. Whereas Hange’s was steady and sharp, yours felt like you were just exposing yourself further the longer you remained silent.
“I-I don’t remember,” A neutral answer, you decided, totally not because you had been rendered nonverbal, clearing your throat and seeing the way Hange’s lips stretched fully into a knowing smirk.
“Hmm, you don’t remember,” They were definitely mocking you now, voice low, humming and melodic as you felt the thunder in your chest beat. You looked down at your thighs, fingers fiddling with a loose hem on your skirt.
“Getting the impression I wasn’t invited over for some homework,” They chuckled, leaning back against the support of the couch, arm stretching over the top.
One sentence and it was out in the open, the illusion you thought was so deceiving completely shattered as your true intentions came to light. Yup, embarrassing, just as you thought.
“So, why don’t you tell me the actual reason you invited me over,” If the last sentence was a stab to your confidence, this one was an extra twist in the wound. Hange was smirking at you, the mirthful look in their eyes showing you that they were relishing in your embarrassment and flustered face.
You swallowed a deep breath, feeling your skin ignite both with anticipation and nerves so lethal you almost wanted to bury yourself underneath the seat, never to be seen again.
“I, uh—“ you mumbled, the script had truly crumbled, you had no plan B apart from just spewing out the truth. You’d die before you had to do that.
“You seem a bit flustered,” Hange hummed, leaning on the back of the couch, as their thighs came to spread, “Why’s that, hm?”
The unlevelled confidence that radiated from them just seemed to further your own unease. It wasn’t often you felt that way, usually being the one to initiate flirtations with others. Yet, everything about Hange just seemed to drag you into a state of bashfulness, totally out of character as you failed to make eye contact.
“Will you look at me, love?”
You ceded, eyes meeting, as you let out a sigh. Hange placed a testing hand upon your bare knee, tentative runs of their thumb over the skin. Soft, Hange thought. The feeling eliciting shivers down your spine, warm waves down to your core, reducing you to a state of feeling unreasonably touch-starved. Hange gazed down your thighs, deliciously covered by the fabric of your skirt, moistening the edge of their upper lip with the tip of their tongue, before flickering their eyes back to you.
“What is it you really want?”
Fuck. A short gasp escaped your throat as their hand trailed up, fingers reaching underneath the hem of the short skirt. Hange was toying with you, no doubt about it.
“I… I wanted to speak to you,”
Humming, their hand moved further, “Why?”
“I found you…” you paused when their fingertips skimmed over your panties, your thighs twitched. “C-captivating, needed a reason to speak to you,”
Hange chuckled, as they leaned forward to reach the bottom of your ear, your breath hitching as their lips ghosted over the skin.
“You could’ve just asked, pretty,” Hange’s voice whispered against your ear, as you closed your eyes. You were so down bad.
“Think I haven’t noticed you, huh?” One light kiss at your skin, “Think I haven’t seen the way you stare at me?” Another kiss, ever so gentle that you almost melted into them, biting back a needy groan. Hange’s hand squeezed at your thigh, fingers towards your centre, just barely grazing over the fabric.
“I mean—god, darling, if you wanted me to fuck you that badly all you needed to do was ask nicely,” Hange’s teeth nipped at your lobe, drawing out the skin with it.
“So, ask me nicely,”
Another squeeze at your inner thigh, and no longer could you withhold the groan that you’d been holding back. You were fighting so many demons right now, hesitant to verbalise your inner desires. Hange remained near your ear, licking at the soft skin. Fuck it.
“I want you so fucking bad,” Your voice came out so much whinier than you expected, used to hearing that tone from others, but never from yourself.
“Aren’t you gonna say please?” They chuckled, dragging it out, teasing. Hange eyed the pout at your lips, the slight frown in your brows—could tell you were used to getting what you wanted easily, to not submitting. They planned to fix that.
“Fucks sake—please, Hange,” You pressed your thighs together, trapping Hange’s hand as they gripped you, as a prompt for them to do something, anything.
“Better.”
With their other hand, the one not currently trapped in between your legs, Hange grabbed at your hip. Kneading over your hip bone, where the dainty zip of your skirt dangled. The sensation caused your thighs to loosen autonomously, as Hange opportunely released their hand an inch. Slipping underneath the hem of your damp panties, fingers teasing at your slit, collecting your slick.
“You this messy just for me?” Their sinful, warm words made you shiver, goosebumps down your arms as they hit your ear. You wriggled, skirt rolled up to your hips, exposing your panties. Messy, indeed. You were growing impatient as you attempted to roll your hips into their hand, craving contact. Hange’s fingers recoiled, pushing from your slit pulling the fabric with as they tutted. Tightening their other hand on your hip once more, stilling your movements.
“C’mon, surely you’ve figured out how this works by now,” Hange’s words sounded so sweet, if it wasn’t for the absolute torture lurking underneath. Eager to tease and play with you for as long as it would take for you to actually listen and cede. With a brattish groan and a sigh, you nodded.
“Words, darling, use them.”
“Y-yes, shit—all for you, Hange.” Voice breathy, avidly impatient. Your core leaked more slick when it clenched, totally ruining your panties as it clung to your folds. The sight absolutely delectable. “I need you so bad—can’t take it,”
There it was. Finally.
“Was that so hard?” Hange hummed, a satisfied smirk creeping over their lips as they teased a finger down your slit, only slightly breaking through your entrance. Pressing your lips against theirs as you whimpered into the kiss, biting at Hange’s plump bottom lip.
“Now then, be a good girl and stay put.”
Hange pressed their finger fully into you, soon adding another two once they saw how keenly you were taking them already, walls wet and ready. Your head fell into Hange’s neck, meek moans spilling from your mouth as their slender fingers hit the back of your squishy walls.
Without removing themselves from your warm heat, Hange cased a hand at your ass, pulling you on top of their lap. Using their clothed thigh to rut their fingers up even further, other hand forcing your hips into gyration against them. The friction from their jeans hit against your sensitive clit and with their fingers inside you, you were a hot mess already. Needy and desperate from their heartless teasing.
“Ah—that’s…fucking good,” You hissed, as Hange lapped their tongue down your neck, before sucking, branding you with many dark marks leading down to your chest.
Catching the hem of your shirt, you threw your arms up to discard it, revealing your breasts to the room’s cool air, heaving up and down with heavy breaths. Hange almost moaned at the sight of you, shirtless with a short skirt pooled around your hips, draping over their knees. Of course you weren’t wearing a bra, they thought. As Hange thrust their fingers into you, their mouth wrapped over your nipples, flicking over them with their tongue. Nipping lightly over the peaks. You arched your back into them, feeling yourself grow closer, the tension in your abdomen building as you bit your lip.
Your hips lost their rhythm, aimlessly chasing the feeling of Hange’s fingers deep within you. Languid gasps and breathless moans escaping your lips. So, so close to your peak until the sensation was suddenly stripped away, leaving you totally empty. Hange removing their fingers, you could hear your own slick cry as they did, your walls tensing.
“Wha-“ You were a bit dazed, a truthfully a little annoyed, you had been so close.
“You’ve not earned it yet,” Hange laughed, clearly relishing in your frustration. They liked this, liked making you destitute, left wanting. Hange had every intention of fixing that sugared insolence they could see within you. Had every intention of tearing it inside out.
Hange reached down to their leather belt, maintaining eye contact as they unclasped the metal peg, lifting you up off their knees slightly to pull their jeans down, before removing their tank top. Their chest rose up and down, bound beneath a black binder. You could see their own centre soaking through their underwear. You ogled their figure, groaning as your sinful thoughts worsened. The kind of imagination that would surely commit you to purgatory indefinitely.
Hange pecked your charming pout away, before bringing their soaked fingers up in front of your mouth. Spreading your lips open with their thumb, shoving it inside so you could taste your own slick on it. Their other fingers followed suit.
“Clean up your mess,”
Hange watched you, your lips bruised and plump as they split to allow entrance for their index and middle finger. Sucking your juices off them as you moaned, gagging as they hit the back of your throat. Brows pinched and eyes brimmed with tears from the hot burn. Hange’s thumb pressed against your bottom teeth, pulling your jaw open, a line of drool slipping out from the corner of your open mouth. Hange would kill just about anyone for you, they thought. Irreversibly addicted to you, your needy eyes and the way you fell to follow their orders.
“So beautiful,”
Hange hung over you. Looking into your glassy eyes, with the hold against your jaw, pinky finger at your chin, they held your mouth open, spitting on your tongue.
“Swallow.”
You did. Quite happily as you groaned, muffled as your mouth was stuffed. Feeling yourself grind against Hange’s bare thigh, your core clenching around nothing as you yearned for the feeling of their fingers back inside you. Your inner thighs completely soaked, spreading it all over Hange’s bare legs.
“Such a good girl—so obedient for me,” They hummed, relieving their attack on your mouth, taking their fingers out and grasping the back of your neck, “Wonder if anyone else has ever slut you out like this, hm?”
You shut your eyes, leaning into their touch as you whined out a passive ‘No’, shaking your head to Hange’s question, not fully trusting the strength of your own voice. Fuck, you were totally gone, lost in salacity and paralysed by your own thirst. Almost brain-dead as your desire thumped in your ears, and throbbed at your core. About to explode from your own ardour as it’d eagerly been building up. Hange was divinely addictive, a substance you should never have risked trying. You could never possibly go back now, too ruined to ever possibly go to anyone else. Totally and utterly hooked on Hange.
“Aw, look how docile you are now, pretty.”
Hange kissed at your neck, coming back up to meet your lips again as you mewled against them.
“H-Hange— please, need more,” You squirmed against their lap, “Can’t take it, need to cum so badly,” You were finally begging, hesitation leaving you to fend for yourself as Hange had you right where they wanted.
“Yeah? How do you want it, baby?”
In between strained breaths, you pointed to your drawers. Strategically placed next to the couch, as Hange reached over. Chuckling once they saw your strap in its resting place.
“This what you want?”
Nodding, you rutted against Hange’s thigh, forcing some friction to rub against your clit.
“Please, fuck,” You sobbed, visions of Hange stuffing you with your strap forcing you to squeeze your thighs against Hange’s lap.
“Since you asked so nicely,”
Hange gently nudged you off their lap, to allow them to slide the harness over their thighs. You sat beside them, legs folded underneath yourself. Hand placed delicately on the side of their head, pressing sweet kisses down the skin of their neck as they adjusted the harness to fit around the circumference of their thighs. Hange shivered under your lips, eyes shutting as they indulged in the sensation for a moment, cursing as you began to lick under their lobe. You were delightful.
Hange’s hand danced along your thigh, fingers streaming past your slit as they groaned at how unbelievably wet you were.
“You’re fucking sublime,” They groaned, dragging you over their lap, hands ripping both the skirt and your ruined panties off your legs. Hange laid their back on the couch, folding your bare thighs over their jaw. You bit your lip in keen anticipation, it was almost as if you had manifested this.
“Fuck—Hange, I’ve dreamt about this for so fucking long,” Your legs twitched above Hange’s face, as a radiant smirk shone on their lips.
“Yeah? Thought about this?” Their hands clung around the plush skin of your ass, fingers squeezing tightly. They pulled you on to a steady stream along their face, teased a lick up your folds before your slit was pressed down against their flat tongue, lapping up your slick as their nose rubbed over your clit.
“F-fuck, so much—was just like this,” You gasped as you rode Hange’s face, watching dumbly as their face contorted with gluttonous solace. Eyebrows creasing as they focused on eating you out. You crumbled, finally feeling some release after being teased for what felt like many unbearable hours. Truly, it was better than you could have imagined, Hange’s fly-aways catching on their cheeks and the sides of their face as they grew dampened, your slick slapping their cheeks and fogging up their glasses from splatters and wet heat.
Resting your hand on their knees for stability, your fingers acted on their own as you came to reach underneath the strap that was dangled in the air, waiting to be used. Your fingers came to meet Hange’s folds, sliding easily past their sensitive labia, nearly as wet as your own, aching. Having been unbearably turned on since they saw your body’s visceral responses to them.
“That’s—so fucking hot, shit,” You whimpered, lost in the feeling of Hange’s insistent tongue slowly flicking deep against you and the way their centre seemed to just suck your fingers right in. Hange let out a muffled, guttural grunt into you, the vibrations making you clamp your thighs tight against their head. You almost felt apologetic, if it wasn’t for Hange, who seemed to get riled up by the very prospect of being choked out by your luscious thighs. Oxygen supply decreasing as amber eyes rolled into the back of their head, toned arms pulling you closer against them. Leaving behind marks on your skin that outlined where their fingers had been digging in.
Whilst simultaneously, you were plunging your fingers knuckles deep into their entrance. Your body leaning back as you bucked your wrist against them, fingers curling inwards against their walls. Hange’s eyes were stuck on you, watching as your body rocked against their mouth. Head hung back and breasts perked up as beads of sweat trickled down, illuminating your skin, the fine hairs around your stomach standing upright. Looking properly, they spotted a few moles scattered on your stomach, your lips were swollen as they bit out mutters of curses under your breath. Still trying to return the favour even despite feeling ruined. How divine.
The sight alone brought Hange to their knees, hazy pleasure erupting through them as they felt their body tremble. Truthfully, Hange seldom let people touch them, opting to typically give rather than receive, yet they felt like giving you permission to do whatever you wished with their body. They were so hypersensitive, extra responsive under your ambrosial touch. Debauched gasps melted into your core, still lapping at your slick as they rode through their own peak. Shuddering, as they seized their thighs against your wrist.
“Did you cu-“ Your excited, breathy voice was cut off by Hange grabbing your wrist, ripping your fingers out of themselves from overstimulation, their centre tensing with arousal dripping down their folds. Hange nodded as an affirmative, you could tell they were slightly stunned. Hange held your wrist against your back, elbow folding over as they lifted themselves up. Disconnecting your slit from their mouth, and moving you around as you returned to facing each other, your legs resting over their lap once more.
Hange’s spare hand caressed your jaw, uniting your lips together as they melded over yours. Sloppy, open-mouthed kisses, slipping their tongue into your mouth. You whined as they angled the tip of the strap over your folds, your slick lubricating the plastic. Hange was frenzied, desperately needing to see you stuffed with the silicone length. Elated from their own high, their words grew more depraved.
“Need to fuck this pussy,” They rasped, voice at the lowest frequency you’d heard from them, “Prettiest fucking pussy I’ve ever seen,”
Your lips parted as Hange slipped the tip inside, stretching your walls out as you gripped onto their shoulders. Hissing as you adjusted to Hange burying themselves into your tender flesh. Sinking yourself down on the strap as your hips undulated against them, pressure building up again within your abdomen as Hange fucked the strap deep into you. Tip massaging over your inner walls, repeatedly hitting that same spot that made your breath catch in your throat and your vision go white.
“Fuc—keep going, pleas—please,” Mewling, you shut your eyes, eyebrows furrowing as your nails came to scratch at Hange’s back. Your words coming out in broken sobs, tears spilling down your cheeks as you were split apart on your own strap.
“So full—Hange—“
Hange sucked against your neck, then licking over the sore spots.
“Taking me so well,” Hange praised, voice sweetly laden with saccharine honey, “Sat so pretty on my cock,”
“ngh—Shit-I-I’m gonna come,” You were shaking, thighs trembling and abdomen twitching. Finally about to release after being so cruelly edged twice. The expression on your way was picture-worthy, fucked out and wanton.
“That’s it,” Hange kept rutting up into you, muttering praises, “Come all over me, baby,” A nibble at your earlobe and you were done for. Your climax reached you, tensing up your spine, mouth agape as you shuddered, face contorted.
“You look so pretty when you come,”
Your core tightened as you spilled out your release; the force pushing the strap out from inside you, squirting all over Hange’s lap. The hardest you’ve ever come in your life.
Hange didn’t relent just yet, making sure to fuck you through your peak so you could ride every second of it. When you finally stilled, your head fell onto Hange’s neck, murmuring softly against their clavicle. Sighing, you lifted your head up, greeting Hange’s half-lidded eyes with your own. A beat and Hange reconnected your lips together, gently kissing you as you came down. Mind still fuzzy and reeling. Their hands caressed your hips, thumbs running down your skin.
“You’re beautiful,” Hange whispered, pressing a tender peck down against your swollen lips, “Wish you would’ve talked to me earlier,”
You laughed, breathy and uneven, as bashfulness struck again. Once the cloud of lust had settled, you were left with nerves, that doe look back in your eyes as you weren’t quite sure what to do now. What if Hange never wants to see you again? After all of this, you don’t think you could handle being emotionally ghosted. It was unlike you entirely, but the interest in Hange remained, simmering as you relished in their tight hold— a hold that almost promised you it wasn’t going to leave. You dared to dream.
“What are you thinking about?” Hange muttered, resting their forehead against yours, eyes closing.
“Um…” You hummed, hesitant, “This, I guess, I’m a little… nervous,”
“I guess I am, too,” They chuckled, pressing their head closer, hands still setting your skin aflame, “But, i-if you’d like to, I wanna take you out,” Pausing, “On a real date, that is, not under false tutoring pretences,”
You pulled your head back, trying to suppress the smile that threatened to stretch, an attempt at masking the hopeful beam in your eyes.
“I’d love that.”
listen u guys 😭 someone pls sedate me or give me a lobotomy cos what am i meant to do when i PINE over 2d characters
let me know if u guys enjoyed <3 i love to read ur comments and inputs
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2n1ghts · 7 months ago
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❝let me take care of you, baby.❞ ❥︎ collegebf!eren x reader
・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・
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synopsis: it was nearing finals, and you avoided your boyfriend— eren—like the plague. and boy, was he was worried for you. your normally cheerful demeanor dwindled to something snarky, something avoidant. all you did nowadays was study till your brain rotted, and it made you a bitter person. he was waiting for the day you'd collapse, and the moment you did, it was worse than he expected. good thing he was there to take care of you. to pamper you because you were his baby.
*contains suggestive content!! advise against reading if you're under 17. minors will be blocked, so please dni if you're one!
key: e/c -> eye color
・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・
hey y'all!! 💌
again, not sure how the whole tumblr thing works. i'm experimenting and trying out writing for fun, so please be kind. i was pretty out of it when i wrote this, so ignore any typos or inconsistencies. also, bear with our y/n. she's crafted this way for a reason.
it's my first time writing a short fic/drabble, and i did this as more of an experiment. i welcome feedback but please be kind with your words. i am just learning and finding out what works for me.
anyways, hope you enjoy lovelies!
best,
~ nene
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The past few weeks had been a living hell.
Not because of the finals nearing round the corner, or because of the two hours of sleep you were getting per night; not because of the crude professors who made it their life mission to assign a million projects when the quarter was about to end; not because of your parents who did not give two shits about your mental health.
It was the distance you were maintaining with Eren that made it the hardest.
He was worried for you. You could tell by the way his eyebrows would furrow when you would decline yet another plea to relax, or the way his eyes conceringly flitted to your scrunched posture whenever you'd cuss at yourself, or the way he would gently, tenderly... remove your hands that tended to roughly rake through your hair when anxious.
Your breaking point was nearing, and he was holding himself back from embracing you right then and there. He was not one to interfere, but he wanted to take care of you, to ease the burden off your shoulders and reassure you that your studying would amount to great achievements. But he didn't know how to reach you. You were so caught up in your bubble of self-sabotage and pressure that you shut the rest of the world out, including him.
But he didn't want to be "the rest of the world." He would wallow in your bubble too, only if you'd let him in.
"Fucking deratives will be the end of me," he heard you seethe from your position on his gaming chair. The both of you were currently cooped up in his room, with him scrolling through TikTok and occasionally glancing at you while you revised and revised till your eyes were sore.
Eren's roommate flew out, which left the place to himself. He lured you here stating it would be better to study at his place with "no distractions" compared to your apartment with Hitch, who was quite the gossip and hinderance.
As you highlighted yet another section, you felt his eyes raking down your figure.
You were engulfed in his oversized grey hoodie, wearing nothing but a flimsy cotton bra and matching underwear underneath. Your hair was messily thrown up in a bun, a few strands tickling your forehead here and there, to which you frustratedly blew from your periphery. Lilac crescents embedded themselves into your under-eyes, followed with bags entailing sleep deprivation. One bare leg was propped up as you rested your chin on your knee and swung the other absentmindedly.
If you didn't stop studying now, you'd collapse from exhaustion. Three hours had passed by nonstop. You hadn't even drank water.
"Y/n," he called out gently.
You ignored him, but he knew you heard him because of that cute forehead scrunch you just did.
"Y/n," he called, this time a bit louder. Once again, that damn scrunch, but no verbal acknowledgement.
"Y/n!" he tried for the third time. You furrowed your eyebrows, scowling. Your slender finger pressed into your plump lips, a gesture made to silence him.
Leaving his position on the bed, he strided over to you. He got onto his knees and gently took ahold of your meandering hands. The callus of his fingers felt textured against your knuckles.
"Why are you ignoring me, babe?"
"I'm not ignoring you," you replied, trying to refocus your attention on your migraine-inducing Calculus textbook. He tried not to flinch at you shutting him out for the nth time this week.
It hurt him whenever you tried drowning him out like he was a petty distraction.
Because he wasn't to be discarded. He was your boyfriend, and he promised to always be there for you, so why wouldn't you just confide in him?
"I called for you three times, Y/n," he stated calmly. Letting go of one of your hands, he gently drew circles on your knee with the pad of his thumb, hoping it'd soothe your nerves. Goosebumps littered your skin at the gesture.
"Can't you see I'm studying, Ren? I can't talk right now." Overstimulated and tired, you weren't in the mood to converse. In fact, you weren't in the mood to do anything. All you wanted to do was collapse onto your sheets and fall into a hundred-year slumber, but unfortunately, finals exist to give you enough of a reality check.
"You are working so hard, so take a break, please," he pleaded yet again.
He'd beg if it meant you'd prioritize your health. He cared more about you than his ego. That's why he always rebounded with a gentle demeanor, even if you were rude and snarky. He knew your brash attitude wasn't your fault. You just didn't function well under stress.
The unfiltered truth was, you weren't used to the princess treatment Eren offered. As a child, you had gotten used to your parents' nagging. Sleepless nights became routine if it meant you'd score straight A's. It had been like this all throughout high school.
Until you met Eren.
He prioritized you first, always, and taught you to do the same. It was sort of... a culture shock to you, a difficult adjustment. You needed time getting accustomed to this novel way of thinking, and luckily Eren was understanding.
Couldn't say your self-sabotage wasn't eating away at him, though.
"And you need to take a break from badgering me. I'm perfectly fine," you snarked. Your eyes broke contact with his, gaze landing once again on the textbook to your left.
Angling your chair, you turned your body away from him, trying to focus on the task at hand. You couldn't bear to look at him because you knew he was right. If you gave in, you would stop studying. If you stopped studying, you'd catastrophically fail, which could not happen.
With a frustrated sigh, Eren swiftly snagged your textbook and threw it behind him. It collided with the mattress with a large 'thud.' You gasped as he grabbed the edge of your chair, turning it towards him.
"You're not getting that textbook until you eat and drink something," he asserted, a layer of seriousness washing over his green eyes.
"What the hell, Eren? Give it back!" You shrieked.
"You heard the conditions."
"Eren, this is serious. I don't have time to play games right now. Please... give it back."
"Who said I'm playing games, Y/n? The only reason I'm doing this is because you're being negligent towards yourself."
"Okay, well that's my problem. Who are you to interfere?" You countered.
"Hey, I'm not trying to be your mom or anything. As your boyfriend, I care about you. It's just a glass of water and a snack, Y/n. Do it for yourself. You deserve a break."
You started panicking. An uneasy feeling sprawled up your stomach as your hands got clammy. "No! You don't understand."
"Then enlighten me, babe. I'm right here."
Rolling your eyes, you stood up from the chair, trying not to cringe at the weird noise emitted from the leather upon loss of contact with your skin. You reached forward to grab your textbook off the mattress, but Eren was faster. He took ahold of your wrist and lowered it.
You grunted in frustration. "I—I need to study, Ren. Badly. My career and future depend on it. These are hard subjects. I need hours and hours of studying to ace these exams. You don't get it."
He doesn't reply, continuing to look at you sternly and not budging. Your nerves were skyrocketing. What was his deal? This wasn't the time to be testing your patience. Plus, if he really cared, he'd understand your desperation.
"Okay, whatever sick fun you're trying to derive out of this isn't cool," you deadpanned.
You tried pulling your wrist out of his grip, but he required little to no effort to keep you at bay, simply planting his feet further into the ground when you tried shoving him. Your e/c-eyed stare pierced him like daggers, but his resolve was impenetrable.
God, what a stubborn fuck.
You continued wriggling and squirming to no avail. Your bottom lip began trembling. Liquid pooled at your lashline, threatening to moisten your cheeks with its salty trail.
You broke.
Sniffling, you shoved him repeatedly in the chest. "I hate you. I hate this. I fucking hate college and hate my parents and hate finals and hate this fucked up system that does nothing but capitalize on our stress and hate motherfucking Calculus and professor Ackerman and—"
Moist lips enclosed your own, trapping them tantalizingly. The kiss was brief and sweet. He used it as a way to tranquilize you, gently trapping both of your wrists with his one hand.
"Shh, just let me take care of you, baby," he rasped as he tenderly interlocked his arms under your legs, lifting and placing you on the bed. The mattress felt soft against your spine.
If pamper had a textbook definition, Eren's face would definitely appear in the margin.
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blondeboyfriend · 2 years ago
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𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐄𝐑 𝐃𝐀𝐘𝐒 (𝐈𝐈)
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[panel reads from right to left]
« Part 1 | Part 3 » [ PAIRING ] Zeke Yeager x f!reader [ SYNOPSIS ] Zeke loses his mind because monarch butterflies have taken roost in the trees by his house and he is tasked with keeping an eye on his little brother. You lose your mind because your crush on him is becoming too much to bear. [ WORD COUNT ] 2.6k [ CONTENT ] High school AU, butterflies, Eren being a menace but in a cute way, snow cones, a kiss, blue texts are from him + green are from you.
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bugs, your opinion? what jind of bug? kind* a really cool jind you’ve never heard of stop. wHAT BUG? b u t t e r f l y that’s not a bug what’d you do? read about bugs last night? It’s pretty obvi that butterflies aren’t bugs
"So you're the bug expert now, huh? Queen of bugs? Should I call you if I see a weird one instead of asking strangers on Reddit?"
You stood in the middle of your bedroom, phone in hand, the wood flooring chill against your feet. At this point in your friendship it was typical Zeke behavior to send you a series of vague texts and subsequently accost you with an exasperated phone call. You were surprised he became so comfortable with you so fast. He seemed so elusive initially, so mysterious.
"Do you... Do you actually do that?"
There was a pregnant pause between the two of you. You heard him clear his throat on the other end of the line.
"Listen I do a lot of shit on Reddit, kiddo. Also who the fuck says 'obvi' anymore?"
"Whatever. Why are you going off about butterflies?" you asked.
He mockingly gasped.
"You're joking, right?"
Your face grew warm. What could he be talking about? Was he going to ask you out? You shook your head, freeing yourself from the notion he'd pursue you in such a way. You were friends, pals, buds. You rode your bikes through the suburbs late at night. You hung out behind old churches, snacking on candy while he chain smoked. You talked about how dumb it was that people bought each other stars and how overrated the Catcher in the Rye was. Zeke's distaste for J.D. Salinger was unparalleled. It was awe inspiring in a "I just turned 18 and this is so deep" sense. You couldn't help but admire him.
"No," you conceded.
"I'm so disappointed in you."
"Ouch. My heart."
He sighed, realizing he was being a little shit. "The monarchs are hanging out in the eucalyptus trees by my house."
"What do you need me to do? Help you harvest and eat them?” you snickered.
“Gross, no. Open your door.”
A pebble thudded against your window. You peered out and saw Zeke standing there in his baseball uniform. You rarely saw him in normal clothes. He jumped up and down, and waved at you, nearly dropping his phone as he did so. His excitement was always palpable when he saw you.
You ran down the stairs and slid across the floor, gliding past the door. You groaned as you walked backwards to align yourself with it and turned the knob. The door barely opened before Zeke came bursting in.
"Harvest? Consume? You’re fuckin—Wait, is your mom home?"
You shook your head. Zeke liked to be on his best behavior when your mother was around. She wasn't particularly strict or judgmental, but he refused to swear in front of her. He compulsively ate mints and always made sure to come by with a half-dozen maple bars, her favorite doughnut.
"Are you insane? Do you know how incredible it is that this shit—" He pulled out his phone and showed you a picture of Eren running away from a monarch butterfly, "—is still around?" He handed over the pastel pink box. The smell of maple icing filled the room.
"You shouldn't talk about your brother that way," you said, pulling one out of the box much to Zeke's chagrin.
He snatched the box away from you.
“They’re usually gone by February. I don’t think I’ve ever seen them during the summer.” He glanced down at your shoeless feet. "You're so slow. They'll be dead before we get there."
"Oh my god. Hold on. You didn’t even give me a chance—”
You stuffed the doughnut in your mouth and grabbed a pair of sneakers. They were a rather old pair. The soles were worn down, the tread nonexistent. Once blindingly white now a dingy grey. You slipped them on with relative ease. They hugged your feet like a bodycon dress from the early 2010s.
"Of course you don't untie them," Zeke scoffed, as he grabbed your arm. His hand was heavy and callused, but still gentle.
"Let go of me, butterfly boy," you teased, not bothering to pull your arm away.
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Across the street from Zeke's house was a grove of eucalyptus trees. Their astringent scent filled the air. The tide was high, hindering any sulfurous stench that could mar their clean aroma. They were tall, the tops barely visible. You marveled at their height even though you had certainly seen taller trees. The redwoods were frighteningly large with their colossal trunks. They seemed almost monstrous in comparison to the lanky eucalyptus trees that gracefully swayed. You and Zeke took a deep whiff while Eren complained in the background.
"It smells like pee."
"Eren," Zeke said calmly.
"Like yellow pee."
"Stop."
Zeke’s patience waned.
"Like you need to drink some water pee."
It didn’t take long for his patience to dissipate and be replaced with utter irritation.
"Eren!"
It was rare for Zeke to raise his voice. You'd only ever heard him do it when he was on the phone with his parents; though he mostly spoke to Carla in a polite manner. Eren pouted and walked off in the opposite direction, swinging a large eucalyptus branch. It whipped up dust in his wake.
"I hate yelling at him. I always feel like such a dick after."
"Well he was being annoying."
"Doesn't mean I have to yell."
You plopped down on the ground in the shade; Zeke joined you, resting his head on your shoulder. A coastal breeze swept through the trees. You stared up at the colony of monarch butterflies as they ebbed in the wind. They clung to the waxy, oblong leaves looking like little clumps of orange and black flowers.
You shivered and pulled your olive green windbreaker tight around you. You hated the random days in July that were tormented with clouds, the kind that dappled the blue sky like soot. Zeke draped an arm around you.
"I'm sure he'll be fine. I mean, look at him," you said.
You pointed over to Eren as he rolled around in the dirt, cackling like a maniac. He looked like a chinchilla taking a dust bath.
"Doesn't matter. That's not the kind of person I wanna be."
"What kind of person do you wanna be?"
Zeke went quiet for a few seconds, though to you they felt like hours. Had you asked the wrong question? Crossed a boundary? Finally, he spoke.
"Steve Buscemi."
"What?!"
Zeke avoided serious conversations by bringing up non sequiturs. Anytime you broached something too existential he misdirected you, anything to avoid talking about his lack of identity or his daddy issues.
"Why does sparkling water taste weird after it goes flat?"
"Do you know how easy it was to fly before September 11th?"
"I just poisoned us. The anecdote is listening to Macintosh Plus in my bedroom. Hurry!"
"You ever been to Pyongyang, kiddo?"
"Who's your favorite dude from the Kids in the Hall? The only answer is Bruce McCulloch."
Zeke was an open book, but with a few key pages ripped out.
You studied his face, desperate to find a crack in his facade. He turned his head towards you. His grey eyes cursed with despondency. They were a dead giveaway when he was conflicted. You fingered a rough eucalyptus seed and shoved it in your pocket. You figured why not avoid some fleas while you tried to navigate this conversation.
"Steve. Buscemi. Are you not familiar?" he asked, adjusting his glasses.
"I know who Steve Buscemi is."
"Prove it."
"He's the guy that gets fed into the wood chipper in Fargo."
"Precisely."
"Are you saying you wanna get fed into a wood chipper?" you questioned, voice weighed down with anxiety.
"Maybe. Would you miss me?”
"Wood chipper?!" Eren exclaimed.
Zeke sighed and stood up, mussing your hair. Eren leapt off the ground and brushed the dirt off his knees. He sprinted over and wrapped himself around Zeke's legs like a boa constrictor.
"Violence isn't the answer," Eren said, his voice muffled by Zeke's pants.
"That's funny coming from you, Mr. I Poured Kerosene Down an Ant Hill and Lit It On Fucking Fire."
"He did what?" you asked flatly.
You knew Eren was a little turd, but you didn't realize he was apt to commit crimes against bug humanity.
"They were coming into the house! Mom found one in her coffee and screeched." He looked up at you; his green eyes couldn't have been any bigger. "Screeeeeeeched!"
"Seems like overkill to be honest," you quipped.
"It's us or them," Eren lamented.
“Didn’t Carla just explain nuance to you?”
“Didn’t you talk to my mom about how to talk to gi—”
Zeke blushed and clutched Eren’s head to his leg, trying to muffle his voice.
“What did you talk to Carla about? Gills?” you asked, feigning ignorance.
“Hahah!” Zeke’s laugh was painfully staccato. “Yup!”
“Hm, bugs and gills. You’re a bit of a weirdo, Zekey Poo.”
You held your hand to your chin as if you were deep in thought. Zeke rolled his eyes and let go of Eren.
Eren stuck his tongue out. “Your pants taste like fabric.”
“I should fucking hope so.”
"Aw, you’re getting grumpy," Eren teased.
Zeke’s mouth was a thin line. He was stone-faced, almost like Rodin himself sculpted his visage. His eyes were dead, lifeless, the color of ash. Embarrassment and discontent had sucked any semblance of joy from them.
"Wait no, he's crumpy. Crabby and grumpy, just like dad."
You couldn't help but laugh much to Zeke's annoyance. You nudged him, hoping he'd lighten up but he remained as he was. A monarch butterfly lilted to the ground and twitched pathetically in the dirt.
"Alright, that was thoroughly depressing. Come on, you’re going back inside.”
Zeke trudged towards the house with Eren still clinging to his leg; you followed close behind. You wanted to think of something fun to do now that it was just going to be the two of you.
“Snow cones, Zeke. I want one.”
“I want one too!” Eren cheered.
Zeke gritted his teeth. “Maybe next time.”
“But I wanna get one with you guys now.”
“You should have thought about that before you started calling me made up words like crumpy.”
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"I'll never eat anything blue raspberry. That looks radioactive," Zeke chastised.
The two of you sat at a mint green table on the boardwalk. You licked your neon blue snow cone. The syrup started to drip from the bottom of the cardboard, leaving your hand sticky with sugar.
"Oh, and green apple looks any less nuclear?"
"You ever hear about Cherenkov radiation?"
“I haven’t.”
“Well it’s—”
You interrupted him. “I don’t remember saying ‘Oh, Zeke, please tell me!’”
He held his arm at a strange angle, trying to avoid snow cone dripping down his sleeve.
“But I love telling you things without consent,” he said, voice almost cracking as the saccharine liquid made its way to his sleeve. “Oh, that’s perfect, just beautiful.”
You stifled a laugh. It occurred to you that openly laughing at a friend’s misfortune could be perceived as rude, or even malicious. You cleared your throat and cautiously bit into your snow cone.
“You’re lucky you’re cute when you do that, kiddo.”
“Bite into a snow cone?” you asked, chomping into yours.
The second your teeth made contact they stung pain, it reverberated throughout your head. You wailed as you were overtaken by brain freeze. Unlike you Zeke didn’t stifle his laughter. He guffawed openly, bringing unwanted attention to the situation. You sunk down into your seat, setting your snow cone on the table on its side. The agony stripped you of any sense; it didn’t even occur to you that your snow cone would leak all over. Zeke got up, tossed his snow cone in the trash, and quickly grabbed what seemed like a pound of napkins.
“Next time you suggest food I’m ignoring you. Or I’m gonna make you pick something less fucking drippy.”
“Fair enough,” you said, picking up your depressing mess of a snow cone. “I need to wash my hands.”
Zeke held his hands out in front of him. “Ugh. Me too.”
After ditching the messy snow cones the two of you wandered around, searching for a bathroom. It was a thankless task. Most places sold overpriced wares and demanded you purchase something to use the bathroom. It was understandable; the area was a tourist trap. There would be endless lines trailing out of the little cafes that dotted the streets if the businesses were more lax. Beachgoers who thought they were too good for the porta potties would coagulate in the entrances. A disaster in the making.
“I mean, like, I get it. But I also don’t wanna spend $7 on a single scone so I can wash my hands,” you said.
“Could go buy hand sanitizer,” Zeke suggested.
“It’s not the same,” you replied solemnly.
“You sound so wistful. It’s like you’re reminiscing about an old lover. Should I be jealous?”
You playfully kicked Zeke in the shin.
“Hardly. They’d never compare to you.”
“That’s… Uh, I—Oh, we could walk to the beach and use those shitty sinks!”
Zeke grabbed your hand, hoping to drag you towards the beach. But you yanked it away just as his fingers grazed your skin.
“Wait. I need to tell you something.”
He gulped.
“It’s bad, isn’t it?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Well, fuck, kiddo. Out with it then.”
“I like you.”
“Who?”
You nervously tugged at your hair. There was still time to backtrack. You could have said just kidding or by “you” I mean Steve Buscemi. But you froze, eyes were flooded with panic. You went to speak but nothing came out. The confession wasn’t supposed to happen like this. You had a plan! You wanted a late night drive up to the mountains. You wanted to stare up at the stars while you both lazed around on a blanket. Zeke would be smoking and talking about something dumb like lo-fi hip hop, and you were going to pluck the cigarette from his mouth and kiss him like they did in all those ridiculous teen movies. It was so cliché, but warm, summer nights were made for that kind of stuff.
However here you were, hands sticky with sugar standing on the sidewalk as tourists strutted by complaining about how packed the boardwalk was. The sun beat down on you, the clouds finally subsiding. You wanted to cry. How could you have managed to set yourself up for failure this bad? You wiped your eyes with your sleeve and tried to gain composure.
“Uh, no one,” you finally choked out.
Zeke rolled his eyes and pulled you towards him. He cupped your face with his hands and planted a kiss on your lips. He pulled away rather quickly.
“Holy shit. My bad. I, uh, should have asked. Fuck, why didn’t I ask?”
“It’s… I don’t care.”
A smile crept across your face which allowed a wave of relief to wash over Zeke.
“You don’t?” he asked.
“No… I mean, your hands left my face sticky which is absolutely disgusting but other than that I don’t give a fuck. No. Wait. I mean, I do. I do give a fuck because I, you know, like you… or whatever.”
You wrapped your arms around him and gave him a little peck on the neck.
“You’re going to wipe your hands on me, aren’t you?”
“I think I earned that right,” you said smugly, wiping them on his back.
He awkwardly kissed your forehead; his soft lips lingered.
“I suppose you did, kiddo. I suppose you did.”
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bjorkshire-pudding · 7 months ago
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My name is Valerie, like the Steve Winwood song. Please consider taking the time to read this post before interacting or following.
Note: Real life has been kicking my ass lately, so this blog and my writing sideblog, The Open Door, are both on semi-hiatus/queue.
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🔷39 years old 🔷She/Her 🔷Black 🔷Multi-fandom writer
Selfship Art
This art of Grimmjow and me was done by the lovely and talented annypuff (please go check out her other art!).
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This art of Suguru and me was done by the lovely and talented @starrnai - please go check out the other selfship art Nai has done!
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My goal is to keep my tumblr experience as enjoyable and anxiety-free as possible. To that end, I have found that it is sometimes better for me personally to follow tags instead of specific blogs - so, if you decide to follow and find that I have not followed back, please don't take it personally!
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Frequently Used Tags (will be added to accordingly; please feel free to block/filter as you see fit):
🔷tinywoodenrobot fics - my fics 🔷how do people art? - art I like 🔷filed under: blue - me screaming about Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez 🔷filed under: asterisk - Bleach-related things 🔷filed under: my tiny tea man - me screaming about Levi Ackerman 🔷filed under: utsukushiki zankokuna sekai - AOT-related things 🔷filed under: one trek mind - Star Trek-related things 🔷filed under: Akari - JJK-related things 🔷filed under: a galaxy far far away - Star Wars-related things 🔷filed under: val watches k-drama - k-drama-related things 🔷filed under: val writes things - non-fic writing 🔷filed under: flying strawberry - Ichigo being Ichigo 🔷filed under: plus ultra - BNHA/MHA-related things 🔷my queuepid's bow - queued posts 🔷filed under: water for the soul - music I like 🔷fic rec: other peoples' writing that I love
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Current work in progress: Magnolia (a JJK Vampire AU - Geto Suguru x Geto Satoru x Original Female Character)
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I write for a few different fandoms, including Bleach, Attack on Titan, and the Cybird Ikemen games (though I am largely moving away from writing for otome). My works will always be posted to my AO3, even if they are not posted in full to Tumblr.
My writing sideblog is called The Open Door, and there is where you can find some of my recent fics, both completed and in-progress. Fics will be added to the catalogue there as I organize.
I tend to write long fics with multiple chapters. I also tend to write my fics with Black MCs/OCs. Many of the things I write for my OCs are based on my personal experience. I also write both canon and non-canon pairings and focus mainly on AU writings. Some of my work is NSFW, and it will always be clearly marked as such. If you're a minor, I ask that you not interact - it keeps you safe and me comfortable.
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My KoFi
🔷Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan 🔷Bleach 🔷Ikemen Vampire 🔷Ikemen Prince 🔷Ikemen Sengoku 🔷Ikemen Revolution 🔷Ouran High School Host Club 🔷Haikyuu! 🔷Shinya Shokudo | Midnight Diner 🔷Tonari no Kaibutsu-Kun 🔷Pacific Rim
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Negativity and hate of any kind are not welcome here; if you decide to interact, please be kind. 😌 Thank you for stopping by!
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misserikacourt · 1 year ago
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Love Murder One - Chapter 3
Armin had been enjoying his conversation with Jean over text until he began to hear noises from his bedroom. He knows what it means, that Marco is likely awake now and trying to figure out what happened, but Armin doesn’t want to face the reality of it.
He’d sworn to himself so many times that he would never put himself in a situation like this again. He told himself he would just avoid contact with other people and live his life alone so that he didn’t have to hurt anyone else again. However, every time he meets someone, he can’t keep himself from spiraling into this dark place. He knows it’s wrong, and yet he can’t stop himself, and that’s just the unfortunate truth.
Now, it’s too late for him to lament his bad decisions, he just needs to do whatever he can to keep from getting caught and keep up his facade. He knows that he can’t miss his meeting with Jean tomorrow, he’s not willing to do that, so he’ll have to find some way to deal with Marco.
Read more on Ao3
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torawro · 2 years ago
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me during and after reading this
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OHHHHHH MY GODSHHHHHH EREENNNN *moans* pls the way i could visualize this entire thing and i felt— i felt it like i feel like i can feel his grip on me and his presence ik i sound insane but please just—
thinking about having sex w plug!eren and how he’s got your legs thrown over his shoulders while his hands are glued to your hips fucking you like a mad man. “o-oh erennn,” you whimpered wrapping your hands around his wrists, “you’re going too hard i— ah! i can’t.” eren couldn’t help but giggle throwing his head back as he did so, his pace never once faltering. “so sensitive…so fragile like a little doll—my little doll,” he smiled reaching over to his bedside table to grab the half finished blunt you two had leftover. thankfully while he smoked his once brutal pace had slowed, but unfortunately the harsh thrusts had become much much harder the only sounds in the room being your pathetic mewls and the sound of eren’s pelvis clapping against your thighs. his free hand found purchase on your tummy, pressing down lightly on the area to get an even bigger reaction of out you. “eren please,” you sighed dreamily resting one of your hands on top of his. you didn’t even know what you were begging for at this point you just wanted more of him—weed always made you a bit more clingy than usual :(( “please what? what do you want mama” he cocked his head to the side, blowing a fat cloud of smoke in your face. your brows furrowed in frustration the itch to have his skin pressed against yours growing by the second, “i just— i don’t know i just want you eren. ‘wanna feel you—all of you.” his eyes wandered down to your hand that was toying with his fingers and he grinned, “my poor clingy baby, let me put this out.” eren set the blunt in the ashtray before pushing your knees to your chest, the fallen strands from his bun tickling your face. “this what you wanted mama? just wanted to be skin to skin hm?” he whispered pressing his forehead against yours. the new angle had you seeing stars but eren thankfully kept you leveled talking you through orgasm after orgasm, praising you for being his good girl and making him feel oh so good. he’s just the best bf ever.
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tsukimirecs · 5 months ago
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levi ackerman // fic recommendations
note: remember to read the tags! + i do not own any of these works
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you’re drunk and ridiculous (and he can’t trust you with anyone else)
gestures
no funny business
as the spark dies
wild card
dust, diamonds
dirty money
nobody's fault but mine
traditions
time
the wife
crush
percolate
petals inked in red
spite
one million to one
power trip
ghost
silent treatment
love hate me
as the world caves in
two faced
bad romance
garden of tulips
plans
and when i see you smile, the clouds will clear
ghostly greetings
safe haven
panacea
sayonara
“may i?”
his wounded heart beats for one
beneath the pages
respite on black waters
galaxies past
overwhelming
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pynkfairyheart · 6 months ago
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pairings: peircer eren x black reader
warnings: smut 18+, kinda pervy eren
Good girl
“Hello?” Your soft voice rang over the chimes as you entered the tattoo parlor.
The shop was quiet, seemingly empty besides the softening chimes of the door and surprised cursing down the long hall.
“Shit- yeah. Just give me a minute. My apologies” The culprit of the cursing called.
In the meantime, you took a look around the lobby. The reviews didn't do the place justice. The largest wall contained a bright colorful mural, contrasting beautifully with the dark floors and connected black walls.
While admiring the piece of artwork, heavy thudding from the long hallway turned your attention to the most gorgeous man you had ever seen.
You never believed in love at first sight, up until now. You hadn't even known the man's name yet, but you craved him. The reviews warned you the entire staff was attractive but they clearly left out that this man was a god.
His long hair was pulled into a low bun, strands falling in his face, the color contrasting against his pale skin. He was tall, with a full sleeve on one of his muscular arms, and his green eyes had you drowning immediately. He couldn't be Onyankopon, they said he was a brother. Maybe Connie or, Levi-
“Hi, I'm Eren” He introduced himself after swallowing the large knot in his throat.
While in your own trance, you failed to notice how he froze the moment he saw you. The bright light you stood under showcased the sparkles of your pretty brown skin.
Your legs were on display as a result of the simmering heat outside, thick thighs causing them to roll up slightly. The fitted t-shirt you wore allowed the hardened buds of your nipples to peek through, despite the hot weather.
Eren never considered himself a pervert but the way his mind instantly thought about sucking on them till you begged him to fuck you had him thinking otherwise.
“Hi, I'm [☆]. Is this a bad time?” Oh, he could have come on the spot, your voice sounded even better without the numerous walls separating you and god your perfume had him wanting to devour you on the reception desk.
“No, no I just don't know how much I can do for you, the AC is out in all the rooms but mine and I don't even know how long that's gonna last so if you're looking for an hour long tat session you'll have to come back” He crossed his arms, muscles contracting against the white tee.
“Oh no, I'm just hoping to get a few piercings but I can definitely come back another time”
“No, I can do a couple of piercings. What were you thinking?” He grabbed the paperwork from under the counter, praying one of them would be your chest.
“Uh well, I want the other side of my nose, belly button, venus dimples, and my nipples but I understand if you can't do all of that or the last one I'll just come back”
“No, no I can do it,” He said too quickly, clearing his throat awkwardly before handing you the paperwork.
⋆⭒˚.⋆
“Good girl. You're doing such a good job for me, pretty. Just hold on for one second, lovey”
He was currently doing your last dimple piercing. The pain was unimaginable at first but as soon as the praises left his mouth all was forgotten besides the growing stickiness that rested between your thighs.
He praised you after every piercing a variation of “Good girl” “You're doing such a good job for me” “That's it, baby. You did so good” flowed from his pink lips. You could never decide which throbbing to focus on, the one from your new piercing or the throbbing of your clit.
With three new holes in your body and damp panties, it was now time for the piercing both of you were dreading yet excited for.
“Do I just take my shirt off here?”
“Wherever you're comfortable, baby. You can go in the bathroom or stay in here and I'll give you some privacy” He felt like a teenage boy again. His dick twitching at the thought of seeing you exposed.
“No, it's okay you can stay in here I don't mind”
“Oh. Okay,” He perked up. Giving you some privacy he turned his back, pretending to be busy when in reality he was trying to think of anything but you getting undressed behind him. Despite his concentration, all he could focus on was the sound of your necklaces and bracelets clanking at the movements you made.
He knew your nipples were still hard, especially since he took advantage of the working AC and he wondered what your moans would sound like if he flicked his tounge repeatedly over the bud, or if he pinched them in front of the mirror while you begged him to fuck you as you pressed your ass against his hard-
“I'm ready” Your soft voice broke him from his thoughts.
If his self control was any less he'd have gotten on his knees to worship you. There you were. Looking everywhere but him, tits exposed. If it weren’t for the fact other men besides him would see, he'd tattoo this image of you on his bare forearm.
“Are you ready?” He suppressed a groan.
“Mhm”
“Okay stand up for me” He led you to the mirror where he prepped each bud. During the process, you felt as if you could crawl into yourself. The most beautiful man you'd ever laid eyes on had his hands on your breast. Despite the occasion being nonsexual, you were convinced your arousal would start running down your thigh at any second.
“Is this okay?” He stood behind you.
You gave a simple hum of approval, thoughts gone as he explained how the process would go. You convinced yourself you could handle it, that it would all be over soon.
That was until he rolled the bud in between his fingers, the whimper you'd been holding escaping you.
‘fuck’ ‘fuck’
“Shit, I'm so sorry I- I didn't mean to do that, please understand I had no malicious intentions I just” He stumbled over his words.
He was just explaining the step by step process of the piercing. He wasn't thinking, just craving. He wouldn't have realized his actions if it weren't for the sound you let out. The sound he knew he'd replay in his head the moment you left the shop, stroking his cock as he imagined it were you down on your knees in front of him.
“It's okay” You reassured him. Your big eyes staring up into his through the mirror.
“I didn't…I don't mind”
⋆⭒˚.⋆
Before you knew it you were bouncing on his cock. His moans muffled as his mouth engulfed your breast. Tongue slightly grazing your nipple with the flickers of his tongue before sucking harshly.
He was stretching you out so good, leaky red tip repeatedly hitting your cervix as his frenum piercing brushed against your walls. The added pleasure contributing to the pace of your bounces as you chased your high.
“E-eren please” You whined, attempting to push his head away from the assault on your breast. His hair was everywhere, the ponytail holder long gone the moment your hands entangled in his hair. Your buds were so sensitive, every suck and swipe of his tongue had you squeezing around him, every clench releasing your cream that pooled at the base of his cock.
“Fuck” He groaned, reluctantly giving your boobs a break. His hands gripped the soft flesh of your ass, groping the brown skin before placing a hard slap on your cheek.
“Talk to me, pretty. You like this? Like bouncing on daddy's cock hmm?” His arms wrapped around you tightly as he fucked up into you.
“Oh my- fuck” You gave him control. Your head resting on his shoulder as you let out pornographic moans into his ear.
“Answer me, mama” Another slap landed on your ass.
Before you had time to register the mix of pain and pleasure on your flesh, the gentle pressure of his finger rubbing circles on your puckering hole had you seeing stars.
“Fuck y-yes. I love it so much, daddy. Please don't stop” You whined. Tears of pleasure wetting the crook of his neck.
By no means was Eren a fast finisher but boy was he trying his best to hold on, you're pussy was just squeezing him so tight, the added tension on his scalp as you tugged on it every time he hit the spongy spot along your walls had his nails digging crescents into your skin.
“I'm so close, daddy, please”
“Let go mama” He pressed hot kisses along your neck and shoulder.
In that moment you came, your pussy tightening around the large girth of his cock. Clear liquid squirting from you in streams as he continued his thrust. Your arousal splashing and dripping onto the chair.
With sweat dripping down his forehead, and stray hairs sticking to him, his thrust became sloppy and his breathing became heavier.
“S-shit” He whimpered, head thrown back as he came harder than ever. Repeatedly pushing his load back into your pussy.
“Lemme take you on a date. Please” He panted once you both came down, his hands roaming your body as he looked down at you, green irises peeking out behind his blown pupils.
“Okay, yea- oh” A broken moan escaped you as he moved your hips up and down his length once again.
“Eren” You whined
“Don't tell me you're wiped out after one round, pretty girl. I know you have more in you, mama. Be a good girl for daddy”
for my eren girlies. this is probably the fastest I've ever wrote bc i just needed peircer eren. oh also how do yall feel about pegging bc i feel peircer eren can be a bit subby sometimes ttm. mwah <3
pt.2 wit the pegging ໒꒰ྀི˶˃ᆺ˂˶꒱ྀི১
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fqiryspit · 2 years ago
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𝐃𝐈𝐋𝐅!𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐍 ! 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒!
eren yeager x fem!reader
cw: pregnancy, car sex, dicking sucking, pussy eating, pregnancy, marriage, children, etc etc
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DILF!EREN ! who gets all the moms ovulating when he comes to pick up his baby boy from kindergarten
DILF!EREN ! who fucks you in the car really quickly before leaving for that grueling parent-teacher conference
"w-were gonna be late" you moan into his chest as his hips slap against yours, cock hitting deeper and deeper into you
"whatever, all they're gonna say is he played with blocks and crayons" he chuckled, finding your lips and catching them with a kiss and his thumb rubbing your clit as you cum around his cock.
DILF!EREN ! who has his dick in your mouth and it isn't even 7.
"fuuuck" he groans, watching your lazy eyes lap at his tip which is drizzling pre out, his cock standing on its own as veins pulsate and strain.
your mouth is so wet and warm, mumble about how you wanted him to have a good day at work and just started sucking.
DILF!EREN ! who eats you out mid-day because he's always horny and wants to see you moan and cry for him
DILF!EREN ! just walks up to you, wraps his arms around you and kisses up your neck, and just spews complements daily
"you're so fucking gorgeous" "I don't even know how I got you"
DILF!EREN ! who, after very hard consideration. (he never not thought about it, he was just waiting for you to bring it up) decided that it was time for you two to bring another baby into this world
"wasnt I already doing that?" he says matter-of-factly, grinning into your shoulder as you both lay in bed together
"eren!"
DILF!EREN ! who cries when your baby girl is born, and praises you daily for giving him his son and daughter, he loves you all so dearly and is truly grateful for everything.
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mookiesspace · 2 months ago
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GHOSTFACE EREN . . . .
it was late at night, wind blowing thru your thick curls as you smoked a blunt while gazing at the city through your highrise apartment balcony. tonight was so calm, autumn leaves blowing in the wind so effortlessly, sucking in the beautiful atmosphere of the night you sigh deeply before taking another puff of your shit. today was busy, you barely had a chance to relax all week. this is all you needed right now, some self love and a thick (dick) blunt to get the night going!
laying in bed mindlessly scrolling through your instagram feed while partynextdoor softly plays in the background of your large bedroom. small yawns escape your mouth while you toss and turn around in the huge bed, eventually throwing your phone down in attempt to end the night hoping for a peaceful day tomorrow.
CRASH!!* you feel your body jolt up in nervousness and confusion as you look around the room. was someone here you thought "Hello?.." you utter grabbing your phone to use the bright flashlight slowly exiting the bed while sliding into your furry pink slippers. body shivering as your throw a silk robe onto your almost fully exposed body, walking out the room quietly to explore the 'empty' apartment. "Hello!.." you whisper-yell in attempt to catch someone breaking in, only to be greeted by more silence. you check the entire house feeling uneasy, body growing tense as you turn each corner still seeing nothing. "What the fuck was that.. shit maybe I'm hearing things.." you spoke lowly, returning back to your room only to feel a strong muscular hand grip the back of your neck while letting out a low growl "or maybe you just need better detective skills, hm?" your frozen in fear. unable to move or say anything, body stuck with thick tension pooling through the mist of air. "Please don't hurt me! I'll do anything please just leave!.." you cry out, tears beginning to form in the corners of your eye. shit shit shit! who's here and what does he want with you!?! well, the only sensible thing of course.. he wants you.
"s-shit! aa-ah slow dowwnnnnn!" you moaned out, legs up pressed roughly against your chest as the tall masked man fucks his thick cock into your warm cunt. juices spilling out everywhere against your bed and his lower abdomen while he harshly smacks your ass watching the soft brown skin recoil in motion. beautiful brown eyes looking lowly at the man infront of him, trying to comprehend the mess your in right now. "plleaseeeee!" you yelp, moans and cries falling along deaf ears as he fucks your harder. thick tip hitting the base of your cervix, hitting that gummy spot so perfectly sending you into a spiral of uncontrollable moans and whines while drool pools out the side of your mouth, tongue hanging low for him to see. "good girl.." he mutteres, low husky voice muffled from the white mask that protects his face, keeping him anonymous, sending shivers down your spine and even more wetness to your aching core. it was all to much, this couldn't be real could it?? you had to be dreaming! this was crazy!.. you try pushing his body off your feeling your release build up once again having you shaking uncontrollably. "none of that shit." he growled big hands gripping yours pulling them down as he leans more forward to fuck you deeper "fuuuckkk!! I c-can-" "take this shit and I'll make this easy for you." he demands sending another harsh smack to your fat ass, pumping his thick dick in and out of you faster than before. you're close.. so so close.. you can feel it. and before you know it your creaming all over his dick, legs shaking, whining and panting rapidly in attempt to catch your breath. you feel your body heat slow down as he rests himself into you, he pulls put before pumping his dick in close release "open up." he hissed, eyes watery and low you complie opening your mouth, letting your tongue hand low for him as he pumps his hot seed onto it. he grips your face tightly pulling his body closer than before "swallow." he ordered, and you do.. you swallow it all.. like the good girl you are. before being let go, head falling back against the soft pillow panting restlessly watching as he steps back, reapplying his tight all back compression shirt and Grey sweats. your gaze is strong, enchanting even.. halfway out the bedroom door her turns to you "next time remember to lock your doors doll.. this could've ended badly." he chuckles lowly.
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blondeboyfriend · 2 years ago
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𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐒𝐈𝐒
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[ PAIRING ] Zeke Yeager x f!reader [ AUTHOR'S NOTE ] Another repost from 2021. I'll always have a soft spot for this fic. [ SYNOPSIS ] You're a talented, hot mess of a screenwriter. Zeke is a beloved actor/writer/director that seemingly has his shit together. What better way to repair your reputation than by fake dating him at the behest of your agent? [ WORD COUNT ] 8.8k [ CONTENT ] Film industry AU, fake dating, tall!reader, y/n has a personality, drug use, alcohol, sexual harassment (Don't fret! Zeke is not the harasser!), misogyny, depression, cigarettes, y/n is neurotic and doesn't like eating in front of people, existential angst, swimming pools, Floch is your agent, hungover!Zeke. [ PLAYLIST ] Here's the link.
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A car barreled down the street, a puff of dark exhaust spewing out like a specter. The wind carried it off, now nothing more than a grey stain in the air. Still, the noxious smell made its way over to you and buried itself in your nose, seemingly singeing every hair. You sneezed and wiped your nose with the back of your hand, hoping no one saw you. In any other moment, you wouldn’t care.
But unfortunately today was a day different from the rest. You had to present and composed. Dignified. The exact opposite of how you were two weeks ago…
You’d been dragged to one of those gaudy industry parties: a grandiloquent​​ celebration for the cast and crew of a film you co-wrote.
You wore an understated, black sheath dress much too short for the occasion. On the model, the bottom hem rested gracefully above the knee, thighs mostly obscured by the cotton-polyester fabric. But you spent most of the night tugging on your dress and dissociating.
Your conversations were stilted. Your words tinged with uncertainty and distaste. Men licked their lips as they eyed your exposed thighs, occasionally winking if you caught them. The longer you stayed, the more your humiliation bloomed into an unspeakable rage.
Unable to contain yourself, you took to the stage and aired out your grievances. You pointed directly at a studio head, one that had been ogling you all night, and told him he probably had a “fucked-up looking, duck dick.”
It was no surprise the industry didn’t hold such high regard for your blatant disrespect. 
Proverbial water filled your lungs with every attempt to mend the situation. You nearly ruined a press junket with an impromptu apology, your hand gripping the microphone like a lifebuoy. Writers and script doctors, people you once considered friends, retreated and left you in their wake. You weren’t worthy of the insurance the studios had to take out to employ you. They’d rather watch you drown.
But for whatever reason your agency believed your talent was worth going through hell for.
“You can’t fuck this up!” your agent shouted through the phone. “Act normal. Smile or something. That’s not outside of your skill set, is it? ‘Cause if it is, you can go fuck off right now and continue ruining your career on your own dime.” His tone changed to a calmer fury. “Act like you are sociable and reliable. Please. For me.”
“Hate to break it to you, but I’m a writer. Acting’s definitely outta my skill set.”
“I am going to wring your little neck on our therapeutic, nature walk tomorrow. I swear to fucking god.”
You struggled to stifle a laugh as he berated you about how to position yourself in your chair and what food to order. He even told you what clothes to wear: a gauzy, light pink sundress that barely covered your ass and a trendy pair of chunky sandals. But instead you showed up at the restaurant in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. You looked positively pedestrian.
“Alright. Fine. I’ll be cordial.”
“For the love of—Act like you’re interested in him! You’re lucky he agreed to this. Flirt, be coy. ‘Oh wow, you look soooooo good.’”
“Is that how you woo the boys and girls?”
“Do you ever want to have a job again? Do you want opportunities?” 
“I mean… Duh.”
“Then make this believable. We need people to think you’re stable. And who knows? Maybe you’ll actually like him.”
You rolled your eyes. The idea of “dating” a man to make yourself seem even-keeled and hireable was laughable. Sure, he was rather popular with the masses and industry folk. A beloved actor. A clever screenwriter. A visionary director or some shit. And yeah, maybe he was one of the more dependable men to work with. He was seemingly the exact opposite of you.
He was the industry’s golden boy.
Floch seethed through the phone. “Listen. To. Me. You are going to act like you’re having the fucking time of your stupid life out there, got it? You’re going to ham it up for the paparazzi.”
“Why would they give a shit about this? We’re not A-listers.”
“I fucking hired them, that’s why. Also I’d argue Zeke’s pretty A-list; he’s just boring as fuck… Shit. My daughter’s teacher is telling me I’m making the other parents uncomfortable. I gotta go.”
“Wha—where are you?”
“A PTA meeting.”
And with that Floch hung up.
“Okay,” you muttered.
You stood outside the restaurant, waiting for this Zeke Yeager. Part of you considered running off and finding refuge in the cutlery store across the street. But no, that would make you even more unappealing. You were being watched after all. Suddenly you were suspicious of every person around. Every car, every pedestrian, could have been a paid pair of lingering eyes. In a panic you tried to call Floch only to get his voicemail.
“You’ve reached Floch Forster. I can’t answer the phone right now becau—Louisa quit biting your brother! Jesus fucking… Leave a message and I’ll get back to you when I feel like it.”
You opted not to leave a voicemail.
As aggressive as Floch could be, he always was your biggest cheerleader. When he took you on as a client he made it clear you were his main focus. The only other person he represented was a surrealist director from Chile he had never spoken to directly.
You sighed and looked at your phone, hoping you’d find solace in your barrage of notifications. But none of them were particularly interesting. Still, you scrolled mindlessly, entering some sort of trance. The smell of cigarette smoke was what brought you back to the trappings of reality. You turned around to see Zeke.
“I thought you’d be shorter,” he quipped, taking a drag. “I don’t know why; don’t ask.”
“Is this how you say hello to people?” you asked, voice bristling with irritation.
“Yeah. You want one?” He held out his pack of expensive, imported cigarettes.
“Nah. I quit years ago. The taste makes me nauseous now.”
“How tragic.” He narrowed his eyes and took another drag. “You know I think I’ve met you before.”
“I don’t think so. I’d remember that.”
He wore a dark green flannel with a few buttons undone, his blonde chest hair peeking out. His beard wasn’t as neat as it was on camera; it was a tad longer, a little bushier. You preferred it over the perfectly manicured one. His long legs were clothed in dark blue denim, with a sizable hole in the knee. It was a relief that he hadn’t dressed up either.
“No, no. I definitely have. It was at—what’s her name—Yelena’s. You were with all those coked out girls. I tried to introduce myself, but you ignored me.” He laughed nervously. “But it’s fine. Do you still run around with them?”
You rolled your eyes and sighed. That gaggle of starlets hadn’t crossed your mind in a year.
“No. I got sick of babysitting adult children with perpetual nosebleeds.”
“It does get old after a while. I knew I was done with that whole scene after I gave a guy naloxone behind a Scientology Celebrity Centre.”
“Can’t say I ever had something like that happen.”
“I don’t recommend it.”
He took a few steps closer and wrapped his arms around you, cigarette precariously resting between his fingers. He smelled like fresh laundry and tobacco. You swallowed hard, unable to recall the last time you let someone hug you. The only downside of it all was the potential of your hair getting singed.
“What the fuck, dude?” You asked, trying to act like you weren’t enjoying this.
“I’m supposed to be your boyfriend, aren’t I?”
“This just seems like a lot.”
“This is nothing,” he said.
He kissed your forehead and ruffled your hair. You hated him for taking on the role of your love interest with such ease. For you it was like putting a cat in a sweater.
“Relax,” he said, dropping his arms. “It’ll be over before you know it.”
You stared out into the street, over his shoulder. Your eyes followed a crowded bus as it puttered by. Anything to not look directly at Zeke. His whole person was overwhelming. You had seen him on the screen a handful of times and found him to be unremarkable, but seeing him in person was, again, a lot.
“Wish it was over now,” you muttered, finally stepping away from him. You immediately missed the warmth radiating from his body.
“We can make it fun. I promise.”
“Doubt it. Like don’t take it personally, but yeah. No.”
He grinned and tossed his cigarette out into the street, nearly missing a meter maid.
“What? You don’t trust me?”
“You’re an actor. Of course I don’t trust you.”
“Oh, come on.”
He opened the door to the restaurant. The smell of garlic and basil wafted into your nose.
“After you,” he said.
The restaurant was small. The walls were paneled with Pepto Bismol pink painted wood and decorated with aging photos of what appeared to be a sizable Italian family. Vases of wildflowers were scattered about. It was a level of hominess and familiarity that left you a little unnerved.
“I hate it here,” you whispered.
Zeke lightly elbowed you. “We haven’t even sat down yet.”
“Sometimes you just kn—”
“Wheredyawannasit?” a lackadaisical host asked.
“What?”
“By a window,” Zeke said coolly.
You hated how easily he navigated social situations. Granted he was an actor; it was basically in the job description.
“A window, huh?” you said, cocking an eyebrow.
The bastard winked at you.
You both took a seat. The table was covered with a powder blue tablecloth and a pane of glass, and it was right by a large window. You felt on display. A waiter traipsed by and wordlessly dropped menus on the table. Everything felt unnatural.
“I hate how easy this is for you,” you said, opening a menu.
“That’s only because I’m at least making an attempt to have a decent time.”
“You don’t find this humiliating?”
“Why would this be humiliating?” he asked. “We’re having lunch.”
Why? Because it made you feel vulnerable, like you were tearing open a wound. You were sick of putting yourself out there. So many years you spent with a smile plastered on your face, eager to please, and for what?
“Because I’m over this shit, okay? I’m sick of appeasing people.”
“You’re in the wrong business then.”
The waiter came by and placed two glasses of water on the table.
“You think I don’t know that?” you groaned. “I just wanna write. That’s all.”
“What’s stopping you from doing that?”
“My reputation. Misogyny. Capitalism. That time I accidentally stepped on a service dog at a premiere,” you exasperated.
He laughed. “You’re too hung up on the past.”
“I can’t help it.”
“Don’t think about it then. That’s what I do.”
“You say that like it’s so fuckin’ easy,” you hissed.
The waiter returned and took your orders. You were surprised and mildly disturbed to see that Zeke only ordered a cappuccino and some amaretto. He noticed the face you made and shrugged. You found yourself intrigued and repulsed by him. He managed to be disarming and utterly intimidating at the same time. It was disorienting.
“So why did you have your little tantrum?”
“Which one?” you scoffed.
“The one that made a very drunk Floch call me at two in the morning, begging me to make you look ‘normal.’”
Floch’s fascination with you coming off as normal amused you to no end.
“Oh, right… Uh, like, I was just over it. Like doing all that dumb shit. Smiling even though I wanna die. Wearing uncomfortable clothes to uncomfortable events. Being friends with people I despise, like those fuckin’ girls I used to hang out with. Not being taken seriously unless I co-wrote with someone else. I don’t know.”
“It got old.”
“Yeah. I used to be fine with it, going with the flow or whatever. But recently, I don’t know. I can’t be bothered. Like I straight up do not care. I spent way too much time giving a shit about what people thought about me. I’m done with that.”
You found yourself clenching your fists and took a deep breath to dull your rage.
“Fair enough,” he said nervously.
Your voice softened, hoping to put him at ease if only a little.
“I’m not really sure where it leaves me but… Fuck it. I’m past the point of caring,” you said before quickly shoving a piece of bread in your mouth.
The rest of the lunch was awkward and unremarkable. You hated how together Zeke’s life was. He was working on a short film inspired by his salad days filming skate videos. He played in a celebrity baseball tournament for charity. He planned on spending a few months in Aotearoa because he hated wintering in California. And he footed the bill even though you wanted to go halfsies.
“Alright. Well, this was weird. I’ll see you around I guess.”
You started to walk off, but he grabbed your wrist. His calloused hands revealed his past in the minor leagues. You turned to look at him and immediately regretted your decision. He looked so dreamy. His eyes exuded kindness. You didn’t deserve it.
“When can I see you again?”
You glanced to the side and tried to concoct an answer.
“I don’t know. Have your guy call Floch and they can set something up.”
“I—I’d rather us do the planning.”
“Why?”
This was a business transaction; there was no reason to make it personal.
“I want to get to know you without that guy up our asses.”
Zeke pointed out a paparazzo in an inconspicuous silver Tesla. He hauled ass down the street once he realized that Zeke spotted him.
He continued. “If you don’t want to, it’s fine.”
It was strange to see him so bashful. You desperately tried to recall the night you apparently blew him off, but that part of your life was a blur. A haze of cigarette smoke, maxed out credit cards, and ketamine. Too many nights spent flanked by socialites with fake voices and wannabe Kerouacs. That period of your life was one long night. A party you desperately wanted to leave. Something as angelic as him would have stood out amongst the filth and depravity you waded through. You would have followed him out of all that muck.
“I’ll think about it. DM me on Insta or something.”
You went to give him a hug goodbye, but he brushed you off.
“Guy’s gone. You don’t have to pretend anymore,” he said.
A sad, little smile had laid claim to his face.
“Oh, right. Anyway, I'll see ya.”
You turned away as he quietly said goodbye. You hated yourself for your vague cruelness, but this was humiliating. Here was this great guy who was willing to put his career on the line and be seen with you, and yet you were a total downer.
But you weren’t surprised. This was your modus operandi: torching bridges while they’re being built, you standing alone on the smoldering beams.
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You were incredibly thankful for the “therapeutic, nature walk.” The morning was calm. The sun drifted through the window, painting your walls with a creamy orange. You sipped coffee, scrolled through your emails, and slowly prepared yourself for your jaunt in the woods. Floch picked you up at eight o’clock in the morning. The drive up was peaceful. You kept the window down and relished in the needley wind pricking your skin.
“He only ordered espresso and fucking booze?” Floch asked, helping you up a particularly steep hill.
“It was a cappuccino. But yeah. Not like I did much better though. I just slyly ate bread, didn’t even bother touching the tortellini I ordered.”
Once you crested the hill you were greeted by a sea of ponderosa pines. Nature had a way of calming your soul, quelling the disdain that seemed to permeate your being. You fantasized about leaving the city and losing yourself in the woods. The further you were removed from the industry the better you’d feel. Maybe you wouldn’t be so neurotic.
“Why?!” He exclaimed.
“I hate eating in public. Let alone in front of someone I don’t know and a guy with a camera. I did grab a bánh mì after.”
Floch sighed.
“I guess that makes sense, but it’s still fucking ridiculous. Think about the food waste.”
You rubbed your temples and took a deep breath. You weren’t in the mood for such a conversation. You were aware of how odd your behavior was and didn’t need to be reminded of its environmental ramifications.
“Are you going to see him again?” he asked, taking a seat on a stump.
“He mentioned wanting to meet up again but on our, like, own accord.”
“Oh, so fuck me then?”
“Exactly,” you laughed.
He rolled his eyes. “What’s the plan?”
You plopped down on the ground next to Floch.
“No idea. But probably something stupid and pretentious. He hasn’t reached out to me yet though. Maybe I scared him off.”
Floch flicked your temple with his thumb and middle finger.
“Stop overthinking it. Call him right now and make plans.”
You stuck your tongue out like a child. “Gross. I’ll just text him… Wait, do you have his number? I didn’t ask for it.”
“I thought you wanted to do this on your own accord,” he said, pulling out his phone.
“I’m adding a teeny addendum to that,” you snickered.
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Getting a hold of Zeke ended up being more of a struggle than you anticipated. His voicemail was full and your texts were never read. The lack of response made a pit open up in your stomach. You tried to fill it with coffee and the occasional blunt, but nothing sufficed. He had no reason to get back to you anyway. You weren’t particularly friendly during your lunch.
That was always the worst part. The hangover from your behavior. You used to think nothing beat the shame of waking up after a night of binge drinking, cursed with only a vague recollection of the awful things you did. But when waking up stone cold sober there was nothing to hide behind.
It was a great relief when Zeke finally called you back. He apologized for being so busy, but his words felt rather hollow. You didn’t think he was lying, but you questioned how genuine he was being.
“Meet me at the skate park on 16th and Sequoia. I have some filming to take care of and I’m trying to work with natural lighting,” he rambled.
“Shots’ll look good,” you said, trying to sound knowledgeable even though you didn’t know much about filming.
You agreed to meet him on the grounds that he let you pay for coffee.
Once at the park you were greeted by a sea of teenagers and their cacophonous choir of expletives and shrieks. You waded through them until you found Zeke sitting on the floor, fiddling with a Sony Handycam.
“You seem a little old to be hangin’ with this crowd.”
“The whole point is that they’re young. Tell me, does that kid read late-2000s, maybe early 2010s?” he asked before standing up and grabbing a worn out board.
You stared at a boy dressed like an extra from an early Odd Future video.
“I guess. Please tell me you’re not gonna skate.”
“Of course I am! That’s how it’s done.”
“So I’m just supposed to sit here and watch you do this?”
He sighed. “When you say it like that, it’s going to sound boring. It’ll just be an hour and then we can get coffee.”
A kid interrupted your conversation by kicking Zeke in the shin.
The kid barked, “Is Eren coming?”
Zeke shook his head to the kid’s disappointment. They dejectedly skated off without a word.
“You should have hit me up later. I could be at home right now and diving into the depths of Vine compilations.”
You pantomimed diving into a pool much to Zeke’s amusement.
Zeke skated off and exchanged pleasantries with the pack of hormone-addled youths. One of the girls set off and he trailed after her. It was a rather boring experience as a spectator. Zeke skated alongside her, crouching on his board, camera angled at her feet.
“Impressive,” you called out as Zeke reviewed what he filmed.
“Please, that was nothing.”
“Do something cool then. Do a trick.”
What happened next should have been expected, but somehow ended up being a complete surprise. Zeke attempted what you later learned was a heel flip. All you saw was him skate past you and then suddenly he was a mess of tangled limbs on the concrete, his board rolling off into a bowl. You ran to him while the kids keeled over with laughter.
“Shit,” was all he could say.
“Are you okay?” you asked, knowing damn well he was not okay.
“Help,” he coughed.
He looked so pathetic and small on the ground. You reached out and hoisted him up. Now that he was upright the extent of his injuries seemed to be reduced to a few raspberries and torn jeans.
“I keep bandaids in my kånken,” he winced.
“Knew you’d have one of these fuckin’ stupid ass, expensive backpacks,” you muttered.
You tended to his scraped knee, borrowing some bactine wipes one of the teens had on her person. Dabbing Zeke’s knee you looked up and found him gazing down at you, eyes teeming with longing. You instinctively glared at him like an asocial idiot.
“You look like you're proposing to him,” a boy slurred.
It didn’t take much to clean Zeke up, but his ripped jeans revealed his hubris. The walk to the coffee shop was spent with him slightly limping with his arm around your shoulder. You wondered if there were any paparazzi around to document this sad sight. Though maybe Floch decided he had better things to spend money on. You were left with only a wisp of paranoia.
“This is what I get for trying to show off,” he said, easing himself down onto a bench.
You took a seat next to him and couldn’t help but laugh as he iced his knee with his cold brew.
“Is that actually helping?”
“Kind of?” he replied with an eyebrow raised.
“Well, like you said, it’s what you get for showing off.”
“Come on. I’m injured. You should be nice to me.”
“I don’t have to be anything to you.”
He gulped and quickly let out a nervous laugh. You took a long sip of your drink and shifted your eyes to the side, staring into a rose bush.
Zeke sighed. “I hate to use an idiom, but you really are a tough nut to crack.”
You shut your eyes tight and fought the urge to spill all your secrets. Something about Zeke lent himself to it. Or rather you were looking for the opportunity to let it all out and projecting it on him out of sheer convenience.
He continued. “I’m not saying you need to bare your soul to me, but I’d like to get to know you. I want to get to know you.”
“I’m not worth knowing,” you droned.
“You don’t get to decide that.”
“I can and I am. Like not to be super fuckin’ dramatic, but getting to know people, letting them in and shit… It’s not worth the hassle.”
“Hassle? I’m not asking you to do hard labor,” he laughed.
“You don’t get it. I can’t just ‘get to know people.’ I—if you get to know me it’s like I’ve torn myself open.”
“What if I told you I just wanted to know your favorite color?”
You gritted your teeth and seethed, “You’re not getting it.”
He turned to look at you. You cut your staring contest with the rose bush short and gathered as much false bravado as you could. Gazing into his grey eyes would weaken you. You knew it for a fact and had to be prepared.
“You’re not really giving me a chance to.”
Damn. It. There was no preparing yourself for his patience, his kindness, even if it seemed a little phony. You held his gaze for a while before finally breaking the silence.
“It's like a piece of me is being ripped away… when I let people in... It feels like a weight. Or a void. Or both? I don’t know. I try to talk about it, but I fuck it up every time. 99% of the time I say something cruel or like dumb.” You took a deep breath. “And it’s… it’s not like I can actually be there for people, if I were to let them know me or whatever the fuck. Like what do I do? I gore myself for these people and leave them with… what? Viscera and trash?” Your thoughts were growing hazy, your anger obscuring your thoughts. “I don’t know. I’m a disease. My heart is a worn down mountain. I’m nothing more than the smoking, smoldering mine under that fucked up town that inspired, uh, Silent Hill.”
Saliva pooled in your mouth. Your inability to explain yourself was making you ill.
“Your heart is an eroded landform. And also, somehow, Centralia, Pennsylvania.”
“That is so reductive.”
“Listen. You’re not making much sense, but I think I want to underst—”
“I don’t need to fucking make sense! I… I’m just so sick of feeling like shit and not knowing what to do. Do I keep shutting myself off? Acting like a fuckin’ demon hermit that shrivels in the spotlight? Spitting and hissing at my contemporaries? Or do I go back to painting my face like a whore clown? Do I go back to making people feel vaguely at ease?! Or do I keep pushing against it?! How many hands are gonna crawl up my skirt if I go back to smiling and acting like I’m proud of the fuckin’ Kate Hudson vehicle I co-wrote with five other people? I can’t do that shit anymore. I’d rather throw myself down a flight of stairs.”
“Okay, Zelda Fitzgerald, take a breather,” he consoled or rather attempted to.
His arm hovered around your shoulder before finally patting it with his weighty hand. A small but welcome gesture. You snorted and wiped away the tears that had been collecting in the corners of your eyes.
You knew nothing you spewed made sense, but it needed to be said. It had been festering inside you. You still felt terrible, but lighter. You didn’t feel like Atlas carrying a bounty of self loathing and misanthropy on your back. For once you exhaled and there was relief.
“It’s green,” you said quietly.
“What?”
You spoke up. “My favorite color. It’s green.”
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“You seem in good spirits,” Floch noted. “It’s weird. Are you sure you’re not ill?”
“What?! No! I just, I don’t know, I feel decent.”
“Are you on drugs?”
“Ugh. No. I legit feel okay… esque.”
The park was crowded for a Wednesday morning. Usually your weekly walk around the lake was a calmer affair. Granted the park was dotted with everchanging oak trees and it was fall.
“All because of some guy. Wow.”
“That’s not why. But you know, he is pretty fun.”
“Uh huh.”
“Though maybe I only think that because he’s hot.”
You happened to glance at Floch and the cat-like grin on his face. Being embarrassed and saying “just kidding” crossed your mind, but it was true. You did find Zeke amusing and attractive.
“You like hiiiiiiiim,” he teased.
“I said he’s hot. That’s hardly… Shit. Fuck. Okay, maybe I like him a little.”
“This is great! Now all you have to do is make him fall in love with you and hopefully have that convince every stupid fucking studio to suck your figurative dick,” he cheered.
You frowned. You had momentarily forgotten about the transactional nature of this relationship. Floch immediately caught onto your disappointment.
“That doesn’t necessarily mean you can’t pursue this seriously. You could probably be his girlfriend or boyfriend or whatever.”
You froze, wide-eyed, letting a rogue jogger bump into you.
“I—I never said anything about that.”
“Your reaction just did the talking for you,” Floch said, punctuating his sentence with a smirk.
“It’s not like I stand a chance anyway.”
You didn’t consider yourself desirable, let alone Zeke’s type even though you honestly had no idea what that was. Your self confidence had been in shambles for months; anything was possible.
“Hm. Now that I think about it I don’t think I’ve ever heard of him dating anyone.”
“Hopefully his type is whatever all this is,” you sighed, looking down at your body.
“People seem to think you two are cute together.”
“Great, but what do the people that matter think?”
“Well… They kind of think a little less of him now that you two are dating.”
“Nothing ‘bout me though?” you asked flatly.
“Nada.”
“I mean that’s not too bad.”
“When are you seeing him next?”
“He invited me to some party at some guy’s house. All I know is there’s a pool and Zeke intends on pushing his brother into it.”
“Oh wow, sounds super romantic,” he snarked.
You stomped on a crunchy leaf. The party could end up being romantic if you tried. So far you made little attempt to impress Zeke and he was still drawn to you. If you actually did something, who knows what you could accomplish?
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That night the driver Zeke hired to pick you up plucked you from your home and dropped you off at a glass windowed monstrosity nestled in the hills. It was owned by the editor of a marginally popular skateboarding magazine.
You were irked that he decided to go to the party early and not extend the invite. You hated shit like this and even more when you were forced to do it on your own.
You exhaled and your fist hovered parallel to the door.
“Just knock, dumb ass.”
Before you could the door was ripped open by a tanned, green-eyed man. He was wearing a red cut-off shirt, a pair of sweatpants, and checkerboard slip-ons.
“You’re not the weed guy,” he said, frowning.
“No. I mean, I have weed. Bu—but I’m not, like, the designated weed guy. I wish I was though. Like that’d be dope.”
He looked you up and down, and hollered over his shoulder, “False alarm.”
You heard a choir of groans and sighs from behind him.
“Uh… so, can I come in? Zeke invited me.”
You introduced yourself and quickly found out the man you were talking to was Eren, a professional skater and Zeke’s brother. He slid out of the way, granting you permission to enter. You stepped inside and stared up at the enormous foyer. A twinkling chandelier hung from the ceiling, illuminating the vacuous space. It was sterile and everything blindingly white.
He led you into a room filled to the brim with people. You found yourself wanting to cling to him even though he was as much a stranger as everyone else.
“So yeah, I don’t know where Zeke is but I’m sure you’ll find him. Let me know if you don’t!”
And with that Eren disappeared. You were happy to see no one looked particularly glamorous, but it did little to quell your nerves. A Yaeji song seemed to blare from every corner of the house; it was inescapable. Doing this shit sober was never your forte.
“Hey! Over here,” you heard a familiar voice emanate from the crowd.
You pushed through and found Zeke surrounded by actors. You plastered on a sickly grin and hoped no one could discern your disdain.
“Hiiiiiiiiiiii,” you sneered unintentionally.
Zeke slipped his arm around your waist, pulling you next to him. You wanted to puke.
“I’m glad you found your way here.”
“You had a dude come pick me up which, you know, made it pretty easy.”
He smiled at you like he didn’t even catch your snarkiness.
A guy you didn’t recognize asked, “You’ve always had a bit of a mouth on you, haven’t you?”
“I was literally born with one.”
“Do you know how to shut it?” he followed up.
“Nah, but I know how to shut yours.”
Zeke dug his fingers into your waist, his face still smiling. You held your tongue while the guy continued being an absolute asshole. This was the kind of nonsense you couldn’t stand. You zoned out, eyes looking outside at the pool. The voices around you melded into a singular drone you tuned out.
“Hey,” he said, snapping his fingers in front of your face. “I asked you a question.”
You looked at Zeke for reassurance and saw that his attention was elsewhere. Your stomach dropped. He may have been standing next to you but he felt miles away.
“What?” you finally replied.
“Did you really fuck Magath to get a writing credit for that Jennifer Aniston movie?”
Your skin felt like it was on fire. Holding back wasn’t an option.
“It was a Kate Hudson movie. Why the actual fuck would I sleep with someone to say I helped write a Kate Hudson movie? Are you stupid or just trying to start shit? Because if your only way to make me feel bad is by implying I slept with someone to further my mediocre career, you need to try again because that ain’t gonna cut it.”
You freed yourself from Zeke’s grasp and got in the guy’s face, towering over him. He gave you nothing but stunned silence.
“Let’s get some air,” Zeke said a little too cheerfully.
Once outside you held your head in your hands, fighting the urge to scream. You should have acted unbothered, but weren’t good at faking. You kicked the air in frustration.
“What was that back there?”
“What was what?” you spat out. “You mean the dumb fuck inside?”
You dug through your bag for a joint and a lighter, sighing in relief when you found them with ease. 
“You should have had my back,” you said, using the joint to point at Zeke.
“I didn’t even know what was going on,” he lied.
“You were right fucking there! You were literally right beside me,” you said, lighting the joint.
“What was I supposed to say?”
You took a hit and exhaled.
“Fucking anything,” you suggested. “Could’ve changed the subject. Could’ve said, like, ‘Go fuck yourself. Don’t talk to my fake girlfriend that way.’”
“Once that guy gets going there’s no stopping him.”
“You noncommittal piece of shit. You fucking Judas.”
“Don’t let something that inconsequential ruin your night.”
“Maybe it was inconsequential to you...” you said, taking another hit.
Zeke reached out for the joint, but you didn’t hand it over. He didn’t deserve it.
“But it wasn’t to me. Do you know how often I deal with shit like that?”
“You should be used to it then.”
You were rendered silent. You couldn’t even verbalize your rage. Words were incapable of capturing the essence of it.
So you opted to push him in the pool.
You stormed off back inside, lit joint hanging out of your mouth. The house felt like a maze, you could’ve sworn it got bigger, vaster. Everyone’s faces blended together. You felt like you were gradually traveling back in time, like you’d been here too many times before. This wasn’t the person you wanted to be. This wasn’t any better than the old you.
You glanced over your shoulder and saw a couple people tending to a soaking wet Zeke, briefly making eye contact with him. Instead of glaring at you he smiled. You were happy he didn’t seem to hate you but it was infuriating all the same. He never dropped his facade. For the longest time you admired this ability but now it was a glaring flaw.
The relief that washed over you once outside was immense. You found yourself sitting on the curb, finishing off your joint. It was a clear night, colder than anticipated. The stars made your discomfort worth it even if most were drowned out by civilization.
“You’re lucky I didn’t have anything important in my pockets.”
Zeke stood behind you, his wet clothes clinging to his body. He was shivering.
“Bummer. I was kinda hoping I’d fuck up your phone at least.”
He laughed and sat next to you.
“I realize I could have probably been a bit more sympathetic.”
“I didn’t want sympathy. I wanted you to have my back. Toss out a witty retort that defended my honor or some shit,” you replied dejectedly.
“You held your own though.”
“That’s not the point,” you called out in exasperation. “I know I can hold my own. But… fuck, I don’t know. I needed you!”
He cleared his throat, his nerves revealing themselves.
“I’m sorry. Next time I’ll—”
“Ugh. Please. I’d rather fucking die than have a next time. I cannot keep doing this shit.”
You looked at Zeke and his pathetic form. You took off your jacket and put it over his shoulders.
“It gets so exhausting. Defending myself. It’s almost as bad as pretending everything is fine, like nothing is wrong,” you said sadly. “I feel like I’m talking in circles sometimes. Don’t mind me.”
“I’m going to mind. You pushed me into a pool about it.”
You groaned and stared up at the night sky.
“All of my self worth used to come from how fuckable I was because I thought that’s all I had to offer. I was made to believe that was the extent of my purpose. The writing was auxiliary. A nice surprise. And I cultivated that notion because I bought into it.” You felt yourself getting frustrated. “Do you know what that’s like?”
“No. I never had to concern myself with something like that.” He paused. “I suspect that was a rhetorical question.”
“It was, but I appreciate you being honest.”
“I wouldn’t lie to you. I’m too afraid to,” he laughed.
You rolled your eyes. “I am not that scary.”
“That guy nearly shit his pants when you got in his face.”
“Oh my god! I hardly got in his face.”
“Just own up to it. You’re a little intense. It’s par for the course in this industry. Nothing wrong with it.”
“Fuck. Fine. Whatever. I’m a little intense.”
Both of you fell silent. You scooched closer to Zeke, hoping maybe your body would warm him. You wanted to make up for acting so childish.
“I could never be like that,” he muttered. “Though I'd like to be.”
“There’s nothing stopping you.”
He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose.
“It’s just not my nature.”
“Ah yes, I forgot you’re such a gentle boy,” you teased.
He grinned. “Exactly. I’m too delicate.”
You hated how cute he was when he smiled; you wanted to kiss his crow’s feet.
“Do you need a ride?” he asked smoothly.
“Yeah,” you mumbled.
Zeke drove you home in his black Polestar 2. He cranked the heater as he sped down the freeway, still shivering. He tried to keep the conversation light by asking if you had been working on anything.
“I can’t even remember the last time I wrote.”
The realization made you nauseous.
“Why haven’t you been writing?”
You hung your head and struggled to articulate your vague, creative block. “I don’t know. Like why bother if no one wants to work with me?”
“Don’t you enjoy doing it?”
“Yeah…”
“There’s a reason to bother.”
“... True. It’s not like I need permission from anyone.”
“Just yourself.”
He had a point. Whether you wrote or not was one of the things in your life you controlled. There was no reason to hold your ideas hostage. You had every right to free them and let them wander the page.
When you finally reached your home you hesitated to get out of the car. For whatever reason you wanted to remain around the damp man beside you. The hearty yawn he let out though helped you make your exit.
You took your seatbelt off and turned to face him.
“Thanks for the ride. I would not have been as kind to you had you pushed me into a… pool.”
“I know,” he said wistfully.
“Well, uh, get home safe.”
“I’ll try. I hope you feel better.”
“Me too,” you sighed, stepping out of his car.
“When can I see you next?” he asked dreamily, his rough hand latching onto your wrist.
“I don’t know.”
“Ballpark it for me.”
His grey eyes were trained on your lips.
“Soon I guess. Go home, sleepyhead. You look damp and miserable.”
Zeke bid you a weak farewell before driving off. You couldn’t figure out why he put up with you. Why did he want to see you again? You, who had dented his reputation with such ease. All you seemed to do was make his life worse. And yet he kept coming back.
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Floch wanted to wring your neck for the pool incident. Someone managed to film it and the footage went viral. The narrative surrounding it all was that Zeke tried to dump you and you simply could not cope with it. You were painted as a hysterical, scorned lover that couldn’t take a hint.
You had to laugh. You wished it was that simple
“You ruined everything. It’s fine. I don’t care, but I need you to know that,” he said over the phone.
Hanging up on him crossed your mind but you wanted to be mature.
“Yeah, yeah. I know. I fucked it all up. But it can’t get any worse.”
“Don’t! It absolutely can!”
“Fine. I don’t think I can feel any worse. I think I had a breakthrough honestly.”
“Oh, thank goodness! Will this breakthrough translate into people trusting you?”
“Nah. But it did make me realize, like, I don’t have to do studio shit. I can just write whatever I want. Fuck my reputation. I mean, I know I won’t make money, but I’ll figure that out later.”
“As your friend, I’m happy for you. That’s fabulous. But as your agent, are you kidding me?!”
“Nope!”
Floch groaned and muttered a few indecipherable expletives before saying, “If this is what you really want, I’m up for it.”
“Really?”
“Mhm. I think you got the talent to pull it off. I would have kicked your sorry ass to the curb if I thought otherwise.”
“Wasn’t expecting you to be so accepting,” you demurred.
“Listen I may be a fucking bastard, but I believe in you. I always have. If you don’t fuck around and get your head out of your ass, you can do it. I know you can.”
Elation couldn’t even begin to describe how you felt. All the unnecessary pressure you put on yourself dissipated. You were free, lighter than a feather. You looked out your window at the soft, warm light of the moon. The oak trees’ autumnal leaves ebbed as a cold wind swept through them.
“Th—that really means a lot to me.”
“Alright, alright. I gotta go. Louisa and Reed are running around like wild animals when they were supposed to be in bed at 9pm which was… Three fucking hours ago?!”
He hung up before you could say anything.
“Dude has no phone etiquette.”
Just as you went to set your phone down you received another call. This time from Zeke. You couldn’t imagine why he’d be calling you at such an hour.
“What’s good?” you asked.
“Can I come over?!” he bellowed through the phone.
“You don’t need to yell.”
“I’m sorry. Can I come over?” he slurred.
“It’s a little late. I was gonna crawl into bed.”
“Ah, fuck. Well, I’m already here.”
You peeked out your window and saw him swaying in front of your home. He was drunk, practically wasted.
“Yeah, I see you. Uh… Hold on,” you said before hanging up.
You threw on a robe and greeted him at the door.
“How did you get here?”
“Whoa, whoa. One question at a time,” he leaned against the door frame, “cutie pie.”
“... How did you get he—”
“Caaaaab. Old school. Called ‘em up. That’s how I’m doin’ shit now. New year, new me.”
“It’s… It’s November.”
“I’m pregaming. Can I come in? You owe me.”
“Yeah, c’mon in.”
You let him inside, stifling a laugh as he stumbled through the door.
“I meant to do that.”
“Sure you did,” you replied, patting him on the back.
You led him into your living room and gestured for him to sit on your couch. He happily collapsed face down on it. You winced and decided to get him a glass of water. When you returned he was sitting up, his forehead a little pink from where it made contact with the cushion.
“Can I be honest with you?” he asked, now holding his head in his hands.
“Yeah, dude.”
“You hurt my feelings.”
“Is this about the pool? See, I knew you were fuckin’ mad at me!”
“What? No. I don’t care about that.” He stared up at you over his glasses. “That party. The one where I tried to introduce myself. And you blew me off.”
You held the glass of water out to him. He snatched it out of your hands like a little gremlin.
“I don’t even remember that. Are you sure it was even me?”
He took a sip of water. “You’re very hard to forget for better or worse.”
“Oh.”
“Why do you think I agreed to do any of this shit anyway? My agent’s been on me about dive bombing my career, which that’s him being a drama queen, but that’s not my point. I, fuck… I like you so much. And I want you to like me too, but I get that you don’t and that’s fine. I don’t like me either. I’m fake.”
“You’re not fake,” you said, taking a seat next to him. “You’re not like… the most genuine person, but I wouldn’t say you’re fake.”
“No. Don’t. I’m a phony.”
“Oh my god.”
He groaned and took another sip of water.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” he whined. “I just… I hate that I can’t find it in me to be like you. You refuse to take anyone’s shit and have no problem sticking up for yourself. A director literally told me to ‘get the stick out of my himbo ass’ when I said he should treat his cinematographer with more respect. And you know what I did? I fucking did it… Not… No, I didn’t pull a stick out of my ass.”
“I figured,” you snorted.
“But I smiled and said, ‘I guess it’s not my place.’ Not a hint of sarcasm. I rolled over, showed that man my belly, and begged him to slice me open as a way to repent.”
“Belly? What belly? You mean your abs? Come the fuck on. Belly? Ha.”
Zeke lifted his shirt and examined his abdominal muscles. He shrugged.
“You know what I mean,” he said, pathetically leaning over and resting his head on your shoulder. “You wouldn’t have done that. You would’ve been said, ‘I’m about to pull the stick out of my ass and beat you with it if you don’t start treating them better.’”
“You’re not allowed to do that good of an impersonation of me. Not this early in our fake relationship.”
It was hard to hear Zeke being so drunk and vulnerable. You didn’t know how to handle him. Jokes and asides seemed to be the only thing flowing from your mouth.
“You are on my mind a lot,” he lamented.
“Trust me. I’m not exactly someone to admire.”
“Stop. You don’t get to decide that for me. You don’t get to decide if you’re worth knowing, or worth admiring, or worth loving. I get to. Not you.”
“Okay,” you mumbled.
Zeke exhaled deeply.
“I’m not saying I’m in love with you. I’m not that delusional, but… Fuck, just let me like you? Let me get to know you? I need to be close to you.”
His drunk ramblings were bathed in anguish with a tinge of hilarity. You felt bad for him, but it was an unexpected surprise for him to be so forthcoming about his pining. Never before had you considered anyone aching over your perceived indifference. You had to admit it boosted your ego a little bit.
“You’re practically sitting on me right now so we’ve crossed that bridge.”
He sniffled.
You kept speaking. “I’m gonna be real. I’m not exactly used to, uh, hearing shit like this so I don’t know how to—”
Zeke grabbed ahold of your face and kissed you; it was ripe with desperation. You momentarily reciprocated the kiss, leaning into him and his embrace. He tasted like tequila and cigarettes. His teeth clinking against yours pulled you out of the moment, letting you assess the situation. You pulled away and cleared your throat.
He was wasted and, as much as you wanted to kiss him, he was in no position to be doing anything of the sort.
“You’re drunk, Zeke.”
“I know. I should go. Do—don’t tell me about anything I said tonight.”
He tried to stand up before quickly resuming his previous position.
“Stay the night. We can get you home in the morning, alright?”
“Yeah?” he asked, taking off his glasses and rubbing his red rimmed eyes.
You nodded. “You can even sleep in my bed as long as you don’t act like a fuckin’ weird ass.”
“I assure you I will not be a fucking weird ass. I’m very anti-weird ass.”
“Good.”
��I’d—I would even say I’m bigoted towards them,” he slurred as you helped him up. “Weird asses have too many rights. We let them out in the world? They’re just skittering around, weird assing it up?!”
You started to crack up. He sounded so serious and intense. It was like he got possessed by Daniel Day-Lewis for a brief moment.
“Hush. Don’t get yourself all riled up.”
A faint smile crossed his face. It was markedly different from the ones he had worn before.
You couldn’t help but ask, “Are you smiling because you’re happy or are you compulsively masking your feelings again?”
“It’s a real one,” he said, his words all melting into one.
Regardless of their decipherability, you liked having verbal proof that Zeke genuinely smiled in front of you. The second you got him into bed he passed out. You crawled in on the other side, careful to keep some distance between your bodies.
When you woke up the next morning you found him cuddled up next to you. You slept on your back so you wouldn’t have felt compelled to curl up next to Zeke. But somehow in the middle of the night he managed to embrace you. His head rested on your shoulder and his arm was lazily draped across your chest.
You ruffled his hair and gently sang his name. He groaned and held you closer.
“Hungover?” you asked.
He yawned. “Just a tad.”
He rolled over onto his back and slowly sat up, his shoulders slumping forward. His eyes were barely open, protecting themselves from the harsh, autumn sun.
“Is your career really tanking because you traipse around with my dumb ass?”
His shoulders heaved as he gruffly chuckled.
“If I were a hyperbolic man, I’d say yes. Alas, I am but a normal guy so no.” He was interrupted by a hearty yawn. “People give me shit about it, but that’s hardly an issue. And, hypothetically, if chasing after you did take a massive shit on my career, I don’t think I’d care. Or I’d at least try really hard not to.”
“I guess that’s… admirable.”
“You know what would be admirable?” he asked flirtatiously.
He glanced over at you, clearly admiring your sprawled out limbs as the sunlight danced along your skin.
“What?”
Zeke’s face fell into despair. He froze and swallowed hard. His pallor took on a sickly greenish hue.
“I was going to say you should kiss me, but I don’t feel good at the moment.”
“Fuck. That’s so sexy,” you teased.
He gave you a wink before softly moaning as waves of nausea overtook him
“So, uh, now that you’re not wasted…”
Your words struggled to form sentences. You wanted to make sure Zeke meant the shit he said last night.
“Can I… Am I still worth loving? Wait! Or knowing or whatever you said? I can’t remember.”
You remembered everything. There was no use in pretending.
Zeke was quiet for a moment before a sly grin crept across his face. He fixed his gaze on you and simply said, “Absolutely.”
“Really?” you croaked out.
“Yes. I have one request though. I don’t want our agents involved or any industry people. We do this on our terms,” he orated.
You nodded and poked his cheek much to his chagrin. “Got it. We do it for us.”
He laid back down next to you, resting his head on your chest.
 “Exactly. For us,” he replied softly.
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nelapanela94 · 1 year ago
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Your back is pressed to his chest, his face buried in your hair. Peaceful breaths brush past your lips, your shoulders rise and fall. Levi wakes up first, reluctant to peel off you. The white gown is crumpled on the floor, his bow tie hangs from the doorknob. With a light flush grazing his cheeks, he recalls the events of last night, curling toes, forehead to forehead, the exchange of afterglow kisses, the giggling and whispering until your eyes drifted close. This can’t be a dream.  You’re here, cocooned, and safe in his arms, the first thing he sees when he opens his eyes.  
He reaches for your hand under the blanket and the cold metal is the there, bracing your ring finger.
Wife.
His wife.
The only fool who’d take him as husband. The only one who could see through his eyes.
If only he could tell you. His vows dripped from him in a stutter and flustered mess.
He loves the finesse with which you do things; he loves your smile, your velvety laugh, the spark in your eyes when you talk about your dreams, your superpower to see the good in people.
You deserve the best of this life, everything, and he promised to give you all of himself so that you will never miss anything.
You stir in his arms, groaning as you hang from the end tail of your dreams. A weak chuckle bursts from him, and he nose-bumps you on the head, dropping I love you’s to your ear.
"It's too early."
"Go back to sleep." he coos.
"You're not leaving, are you?"
He holds you even tighter. "Never."
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misserikacourt · 1 year ago
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Love Murder One
“O-oh, yeah…I’ve read it a million times. It’s one of my favorites, too,” the man answers, and Jean turns his attention back to the smaller as he speaks. That might have been a mistake on his part, though, because he’s completely captivated by the crystal blue eyes of this pretty stranger as soon as his meet them. “Are you looking for anything in particular?”
“Ah, just something spooky. ‘Tis the season, ya know?” Jean asks with a half-hearted chuckle. God, he’s so embarrassing.
“Yeah, October always gets me in that kind of mood, too. Are you looking for suggestions?” The blonde asks, and Jean raises his eyebrows. He’d thought that this man would cringe at his prior words and just move on. Stop talking to him altogether and find another section of the bookstore to browse until Jean left, but instead, he seemed more interested in speaking with him.
“Uh, sure. I’m open to any suggestions you might have. Um, I’m Jean, by the way. What’s your name?”
“I’m Armin. It’s nice to meet you, Jean,”
Read more on Ao3
Spooky season is in full swing, so have my attempt at a spooky Jearmin fic. It'll have multiple chapters, so hopefully, I can get it done before Halloween! Mind the tags! I'll be adding more as the story progresses!
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zekescherries · 29 days ago
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ׅ ˙ levi & physical touch
levi hates being touched, even if it's a guy from a random person or a handshake, he'll decline. it's a complicated thing, he isn't used to things that would be considered "gentle touches".
most of his life levi has just experienced violence and cruelty at the hands of many, those he knew and even strangers. getting beaten within a half inch of your life almost everyday just to get your hands on even the smallest slice of bread is something that doesn't really leave you.
so, levi hates being touched. he can really only correlate being touched to being violet and unruly.
it takes a while for levi to warm up to the idea of you touching him, even if you two are in a relationship. it's not that he doesn't trust you, he's just scared. though he wouldn't admit it outright.
sometimes, people are afraid of the unknown but levi has never been afraid of anything. not in a long time at least. no titan, man or animal has invoked fear into him like this has.
he's not sure where to even start. but when you invite him to take a warm bath with you he agrees, he's not even sure why.
you keep your hands to yourself as to not cross his boundaries. levi can't help but feel conflicted, he wants to touch you, he wants to be like other couples who hold hands and hug each other so close that they seem as if they're one.
"can i wash your back?" the question is polite, innocent. levi agrees, it wouldn't hurt, right? he trusts you, he believes you won't hurt him. you aren't those men, you aren't those strangers.
your touch is everything he dreamt of and more, gentle. a gentle touch. he melts, his body relaxing.
maybe this was the first step you both had to take.
a/n﹕maybe i'll turn this into a fanfic one day. 🫠
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© zekescherries 🍒
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tsukimirecs · 2 months ago
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levi ackerman // fic recommendations
note: remember to read the tags! + i do not own any of these works
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ignited
the feeling's mutual
the forgotten day
a river of three crossings
press four for more options
one million to one
spring cleaning
slow hands
outlier
the bet
blueberry tea and lavender soap
melt
i need you
try
honey, honey (how you thrill me)
dante's inferno
beautiful
regimens
apricity
smoke and mirrors
the short end of the stick
warmth
nothing to lose, vengeance to gain
broken promises.
no man's sky
beg, borrow & steal
the mortal price of crossing twice
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pynkfairyheart · 6 months ago
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Pairings: connie x black reader
Warnings: smut 18+ Connie's a lil toxic, mentions of a gun, pretty angsty
pt.2 to birthday girl but can be read as a standalone
Miss you
Constance Springer. The man who was once the source of your happiness though recently the source of your frustration and headaches.
“I just don't get it, Con. You take me on these amazing dates, buy me anything that catches my attention, and say you wanna spend the rest of your life with me, yet when I ask to publicly announce we’re together, which I shouldn't have to, you always brush it aside.” You spoke as calmly as possible. Though considering this was the 4th time this week you were having this conversation your calm tone resembled shouting.
It had been five months since your birthday. Five months since Connie gave you the best gift you could ever think of. Himself.
The first four months felt as if you were on cloud nine. The entire duration it was as if you were conjoined at the hip. Connie had to make a couple of drops? There you were in his passenger seat watching a movie or using his card to pay for the large quantity of your cart.
You needed to go make up a missed exam? Connie was waiting in his car with a bouquet of your favorite flowers. The only time you weren't seen together was if he was doing something he didn't want you involved in or if he was out buying you secret lavish gifts such as the car he got you a week after your birthday. Life was great.
It wasn't til you were at your nail appointment with Mika where she nearly cut you with her clippers from shock the moment you brought up your relationship with Connie, that you realized no one knew about it.
At first, you were confused. How could no one know? You were always together but the more you thought about it you started to understand. Whenever you were out he wasn't as affectionate as when it was just the two of you, just a few touches that could easily be considered friendly, but you just brushed it off as him not being comfortable with PDA.
Even when you went on dates he'd buy the entire venue or restaurant out so it'd be just you two or would plan the nicest dates at the house, either way, no one saw you on dates as a couple.
You thought about it for a while before it finally ate you up and you just had to ask. His response was the reason shit went left.
“Whatchu mean let people know we’re together? Ion want people in our business. I'm yours and you're mine, that's all that matters” He brushed it off with a kiss on your forehead before running to go get some eggs around the corner. He was only gone for ten minutes yet in that time frame you went through hundreds of different reasons as to why he responded that way.
At first, you were confused. Then, you were trying to reassure yourself he's right as long as we know then we straight. But immediately after that thought came anger why the fuck doesn't he want people to know? Am I the fuckin side chick?
By the time Connie came back you were fuming. You trusted Connie, the night he asked you to be his he promised you he'd never do anything to hurt you yet you couldn't deny how suspicious this was. He barely had time to lock the door behind him before you started with your questions.
“You cheating on me Constance?”
“What?” He almost gave himself whiplash with how fast he turned, looking at you as if you had said the stupidest shit ever which in his mind you did.
“You heard me. Are you cheating?” You followed him into the kitchen of his apartment.
“No [☆] I'm not cheating. I needa take you to the ER? Cause it sounds like you hit your head while I was gone”
“Then why don't you wanna tell anyone?”
“About us?”
“Duh”
“I already told you, mami, I don't want people all up in our business”
That was two weeks ago and you guys were nowhere near in a better place. By no means were you insecure. You knew Connie loved you and only you but you wanted others to know as well. It's not like you wanted to leak one of your many sex tapes on IG. You just wanted at least your friend group to know you were together. Connie wasn't having it though.
“Mama lower your tone” He groaned. Inked hands rubbing his face from frustration.
“Just tell me, Con. Why don't you want anyone to know?”
“Is it wrong to wanna keep our relationship private? I love you princess but you buggin’ for real. Drop it”
“You know what. Fuck this, nd fuck you too. There's a big fucking difference between private and secret.” You slammed his bedroom door. This was too much. You couldn't take it anymore; it was as if he was ashamed of you. You loved Connie, you really, really loved him but this hurt, the constant drop of your heart whenever he let go of your hand the moment you stepped out of his apartment complex or whenever a girl flirted with him in front of the group but there was nothing you could do. You were done. No amount of love could make you settle for anything less than you knew you deserved.
Despite your teary eyes you managed to pull yourself together. Grabbing your bag, you packed as much as possible before finally exiting the room.
Connie was in the middle of rolling a blunt when he saw you walk out, he would have been convinced that his heart was lying on the couch when he stood up if it wasn't for the loud thumping in his ears.
“Where are you going?” He stood in your way
“Connie please move” You sniffled
“No, not until you tell me where you're going. Please [☆] lo siento, mami, por favor, no te vayas please don't go” His voice cracked as reality hit him. Dropping to his knees, his hands gripped the soft flesh of your hips.
“I promise to be better, I promise. I will call everyone on my phone and tell them about us right now, please don't go” At this point, you had to look away. His tear-stricken face and Spanish almost had you fold.
“We'll work this out ma, estaré mejor, lo prometo I'll be better, I promise”
“No, we can't Connie. Not right now” And with that, you left.
A month had passed so far. It was rough in the beginning. He blew your phone up 24/7 to the point where you had to block him. You couldn't eat, and whenever you did have the energy to stay awake you did nothing but scroll on your phone, your thumb always finding the photo album where you stored all pictures of Connie.
Sasha and Mikasa finally had enough, while Mika was the only one you told Sasha had a pretty good idea after she went to visit Connie only to find him in the same state as you, maybe even worse. Deciding you needed to leave the walls of your apartment and have fun, they finally convinced you to go out. Taking a couple of pregame shots while shaking ass in the mirror, your outfit leaving nothing to the imagination as you finally felt ready to face reality.
By the time you had arrived at the party, the drinks started to kick in and you grabbed the first sexy guy you saw and dragged him to the dance floor.
Unknown to you Connie was also at the party, standing in the corner as he made a few deals. He looked tired, and he was. The moment the door closed behind you he broke down. Ignoring all of the calls and texts he got from clients as he sat there. He was angry. Angry at you for leaving him but mostly angry at himself for fucking up.
When Connie finally caught sight of you it was as if someone had finally flipped the switch on throughout his body. His heart sped up, his posture straightened and his dick twitched at the sight of your body in the dress.
His dick wasn't the only thing twitching. When it finally registered to Connie that you were letting some random guy touch you as you whined on him, his eye twitched and his hand immediately went to his gun.
He was furious. With zero fucks he approached you, the barrel of his gun pressed against the guy who you were currently throwing it back on.
When you no longer felt the swaying of the man behind you, you turned to be met with the fear-frozen stranger and Connie whispering something in his ear. You didn't have time to ask what was going on before the guy scurried off and Connie roughly grabbed your arm, dragging you out of the house party.
Despite the fact you were no longer together and he had no right to drag you away, you stayed quiet. Connie rarely got angry but when he did you knew it was best to just stay quiet.
“Get in the fucking car [☆]” He threw open the door. You were convinced the thong you had on was completely drenched after those six words. His voice was low and threatening and you almost felt disgusting from how turned on you were. Almost. With one look into his rage-filled eyes, you got in the car, the door slamming behind you when he was sure you were safely in.
He quickly got in, tire tracks marking the ground as he sped off. It was silent for a minute before you decided to speak, once his grip on the steering wheel loosened and the color returned to his knuckles.
“Connie?” You faced him, eyes burning into the side of his head as he kept his dark stare on the road.
“Connie, come on. You can't just kidnap me and then not speak. Pull over and talk to me now” You huffed.
With a roll of his eyes, he pulled into a deserted parking lot.
“Hello? Either you get to talking or I'm getting out nd calling an Uber”
“No the fuck you're not” He groaned loudly, eyes meeting yours.
“Then talk” You borderline yelled
If Connie's hair was long enough to grip he'd have a couple bald spots from how frustrated he was. He gave you both time to cool down before he spoke.
“Look I'm sorry for dragging you away, and for threatening your lil boyfriend-”
“He's not my boyfriend”
“He's not?”
“No. Continue your apology” You rolled your eyes.
Your response had a smirk forming on his face. He missed you so much, even your attitude.
“I missed you ma. I'm sorry for dragging you away. I'm also sorry for how things ended.” He grabbed your hand.
“I now understand your feelings and your concerns and I'm sorry I ever made you feel like I was ashamed of you or if there was another woman. You're the love of my life ma, this past month has been pure hell. I need you baby. Please take me back.” His hands were shaking as they held yours securely. It was rare to see Connie cry, and the sight of his tear-streaked face made your heart ache. He really did love you.
Swallowing the lump in your throat you asked the one question that started it all.
“Be real Con. Why didn't you want anyone to know?”
With a sigh, he rubbed his facial hair.
“I was afraid you'd realize you could do better”
“What? What made you think that Con?”
“I sell drugs for a living, mami, I'm involved with a shit ton of dangerous people. I was afraid when others found out they'd start telling you things about me and you'd realize you can do so much better”
“Oh, Connie” You could no longer resist the need to be close to him. Maneuvering yourself so you sat in his lap you cupped his face as your eyes searched his.
“Papa there is no one better. I love you so much, Connie. There is nothing anyone could ever say to make me want or love you less because I know you. I know how much you care and love those around you. There is no one better, Connie.”
For some time, the two of you were wrapped in each other's arms as you faced your emotions.
When you both were calm, you finally dared to look into his eyes. The energy shift resembling the one from your birthday.
“Con” You slowly inched your face closer to his
“I'm sorry for all the hurt I put us through mami” His hand wrapped around your neck
“Déjame compensarte let me make it up to you” He closed the space between you.
It felt like the first breath taken after being underwater for a long time. You felt alive, felt loved. The once slow kiss grew into something more passionate. Both of you needy, as you fiend for dominance in the heated exchange.
Ultimately you lost the battle when his hands gripped your hips tightly as if to assure himself you weren't leaving again. It wasn't soon after that you found yourself in the back of his car with your legs resting on his shoulder as he drilled into you.
He littered kisses on your ankle as his grip on your hips tightened. His thick cock stretching you out had your eyes rolling back and moans of ecstasy coming out of your agape mouth.
“Yeah? You doing so good fa me ma. You miss this? Miss how good I fuck you?” His thumb found its way to your clit.
“Fuck, Connie” You whined. Attempting to push his hand away from the sensitive bud.
“Answer me princesa or ima stop” He warned
“Yes, Connie- mhmph I miss it so bad papi oh my god” Your velvety walls squeezed him tight.
"Fuuuck. Don't ever leave me again, you hear me? I can't take it, baby, I love you too much. T-try that shit again nd Imma make you watch while I put a bullet in between his eyes. Understand?” His pace increased.
God that shouldn't have turned you on as much as it did. You were convinced you could have come on the spot, the added pressure on your carotids when you didn't answer immediately wasn't any help.
“Y-yes Con, I promise it won't happen again” You managed to say in between the moans and whimpers that you no longer had the energy to contain.
“Keep squeezing me, mami. I'm so fuckin close” He groaned, hand no longer on your neck as it rested against the steamy windows to stable himself.
The atmosphere of the car was pure filth. Your moans bounced off the windows, the sloshing sound of your wet pussy and slapping skin that created the creamy ring around the base of cock topping it all off.
His thrusts were slowly getting sloppy, you were just squeezing him so tight.
“C-Con” You managed to gasp out, the marks he littered on your neck to suppress his whimpers, having the coil in your belly tighten.
“I know mama, let go fa me” He groaned.
That instant you came, eyes rolling to the back of your head for a quick second as your cream and small spurts of squirt leaked from your pussy.
“Shit mama” He panted, dick twitching as he painted your walls with his cum.
Connie being the lover boy he was despite repeatedly denying it whispered apologies, and sweet promises into your ear as you came down from your high.
“I'm sorry mami, I promise to be better” He kissed you softly as if you were in a fairytale before whispering in your ear.
“But don't think just cus we're good now, that I'm not gon tear that ass up when we get home for giving that loser a taste of what's mine.”
I dont know how i feel about this one buuutttt all thanks to @masterofthepp for giving me this idea. Hopefully it meets your standards babes. As always any feedback is welcome. mwah
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