#As you can tell this is the one that made me go insane and overdo all these sketches

[moecartoons]

Matt Angst! Don't forget to pick up your kids.

[1moremilgram-enjoyer]

A Theory on the Kayanos' Murders

CW Violent murder, blood, mention of dismemberment

Hello members of the jury! I'm currently writing a few posts regarding the prisoners' murders and forgiveness and all that, so I decided I would explain my full theory on what the Kayanos' murders are, since while it's nothing out of the norm (I think), my exact interpretation gets a bit specific. And thus, I want to put all the evidence I have for my claims in one post so I don't sound insane when discussing these two.

(Yes despite what my previous posts may imply I actually believe Twokoto now lol. I still think Trikoto is perfectly fine, I just think Twokoto makes a bit more sense currently)

Again, it's nothing too wild; I believe Mikoto killed someone on the side of the road, the trauma from that caused John to be 'born', and then John killed at least two other people because he knew they were causing Mikoto trouble.

Claim 1: John killed people

A big part of this post is going to rely on the windows in Double. In case you're not aware, it's generally agreed that white windows are related to Mikoto while black windows are related to John. It's easy to tell from the first chorus, the start of the second verse, and the second chorus. Mikoto to the left, John to the right.

Additionally, when the windows are white, the train seems to be moving to Mikoto's left to the right (perspective from the first chorus), while when the windows are dark it moves from John's right to his left. This gives the impression that Mikoto and John are sitting across from each other, with Mikoto on the left side of the train and John on the right side. Here, I made a graph to help with the perspective because it is a bit mindfucky.

(Clarification: when I say "Mikoto's perspective" I actually mean our perspective while looking at Mikoto. Same with John. Apologies for the confusion)

Of course, that's assuming they actually are on the same train, going in the same direction, but I don't think that's too wild an assumption to make.

It's important to note this doesn't have anything to do with the window colors, which are exclusively used to differentiate alters, with the exception of the very end where John is seen with white windows long story. Rather, this perspective thing is a surprise tool which will help us later.

Anyways, now that we know the window thing, it's not hard to see how John has killed at least one person.

I mean, yeah. He sure do be killing in that shot. Black windows, so this is John. There's also this:

Although the kill itself has white windows in the background, the train compartment it happens in has dark windows.

Plus there's the whole "I saved you, right?" in the past tense. It can't be referring to John taking the fall for Mikoto's murder (we'll get there), since Mikoto hasn't been saved from that yet. Instead, it sorta has to be about John previously killing people that were stressing Mikoto out. Especially when looking at other lines like:

[Double] You’re overdoing it, you’re already broken But if you persist, I guess it’s my job to keep things on an even keel Me, the other you I’ll take it all on

The use of present tense in "you're overdoing it" implies this is being sung at a time when Mikoto is overworking, and it's now that John will "keep things on an even keel." Combined with him picking up the metal bat here, it seems he's talking about killing to ease Mikoto's issues.

Which, speaking of, I should probably say why John would kill anyone.

Claim 2: John's Motivations

[Neoplasm] Es: Can I ask… why you killed them? John: They annoyed me. Es: Who did you kill? John: Just someone who was walking around nearby. Es: … How many did you kill? John: Can't remember. I was first born back then, you know. It's kinda fuzzy.

Now, these claims aren't the most trust-worthy, but we'll get there when we get there. For now, all we have as a stated motive is "they annoyed [me]" (no pronoun used, it's ambiguous who they actually annoyed) and "to save Mikoto." The good news is that we actually did sorta see a situation where John tried to kill someone, meaning we can get an idea of what his modus operandi is.

I'm referring to the point in John Doe where John attacks Es.

[John Doe] Mikoto: I became a murderer… without even knowing it…? There's no way, no way… Es: Let's give it some time. The threads of your memory might untangle themselves eventually. Mikoto:*Gasping* Es: A murderer without memory of killing… in which case, how should I think of you… Hey, Mikoto– John: AAAAAAAARGH!!!!!!

Es does absolutely nothing between the time John starts fronting and when John attacks them. And if you look further, Es doesn't do much else. That means either John has some idea of what was going on before he started fronting, or he can feel Mikoto's resentment even though he isn't the one fronting.

This is where I acknowledge I am not an expert in DID, I'm not a system, and because of that there is a high chance I get stuff wrong, please correct me if I say anything stupid!

Although I unfortunately can't find any better sources for this than some Reddit threads, from what I understand it's possible for one alter to feel the emotions of a different alter who isn't fronting. This means John could have known Mikoto was getting really frustrated with Es, and decided Es had to die for that. However, it's unclear how much John knew about the situation, since he never says anything too specific.

As a result, it's possible John is willing to attack people because he can feel Mikoto hates them, even if he isn't fully sure why Mikoto might be frustrated at them. On the other hand, perhaps John does retain memory of what Mikoto goes through even when Mikoto is fronting. Again, I can't find good sources on how this works, but from what I've seen some systems do have alters which can share memories to an extent. I really hope I'm not saying anything horrendously stupid lol.

Anyways, the point I'm trying to make is that regardless of how it happens, John's desire to kill his victim(s) comes from Mikoto's frustrations with those people.

[Neoplasm] John: …! … I think… I might be the person Mikoto wishes he was. The person who stubbornly stands his ground, who doesn't cry himself to sleep from stress, who gives people their payback.

The fact he's represented by the Devil card, which is associated with people's darkest desires, supports the idea his actions are an extension of Mikoto's wishes.

This can also be inferred from the "neuron" scene in Double. You know the one, the one that goes "Doesn't matter if you didn't wish for it, can't get rid of me now". I interpret those silver star things to be representative of neurons, and it's animated in the way it is to represent Mikoto's thoughts (the words in blue) reaching John's conscious at the bottom (the red). I hope that makes sense.

So in short, I believe John found out Mikoto was getting bothered by certain people, and that's why he killed them.

Claim 3: Mikoto killed a guy

Alright so now the harder one to prove. Let me add up all the evidence.

Point #1: Mikoto is the Milgram prisoner, not John

This one is pretty straightforward. Since Milgram doesn't gather every single murderer in the world, John not being a prisoner doesn't mean he didn't kill. But the inverse is potentially true; if Mikoto is a prisoner, then he must have killed someone. Unless there's more alters and one of them is the prisoner, this makes some sense.

The counter-argument is that Milgram is very clearly not designed for systems, so it's possible Mikoto is only the prisoner because he's the host and no other reason. Still, it's worth keeping in mind.

Point #2: A murder on light windows

Take a look at this scene from Double.

As you can see, the way this is framed, it looks as if Mikoto is running away from John. Down to the horror movie motifs of "victim running - persecutor walking." This time, the windows on both sides of Mikoto are white, while the windows on both sides of John are black, instead of there being white and black across from each other.

Looking at the scene, which I can't really show you with still images and will need you to confirm yourself, is that John and Mikoto are moving in the same direction as the train. You can tell based on the relative speed of the objects outside. And yet, there's body parts outside of the train, which move from the front to the back. On the white windows. Which represent Mikoto. And there's an entire window between the left of the screen (where for all we know the windows could change) and where the blood appears. Here's a diagram.

So, uh, Mikoto? Who the hell killed that guy? It certainly wasn't John, especially because the body parts are outside. John was the one who got onto the train (see: cigarette), so I would argue a murder outside could imply it was performed by Mikoto, who notably doesn't usually ride trains. Although I'm not sure that reasoning makes sense to anyone but me.

However, the body being outside presents a much bigger issue for Mikoto's innocence. When John swings, and apparently causes something similar to happen, he's inside. We don't see the mannequin he supposedly hits, and God knows how the pieces ended up outside. Not to mention he for some reason swings at where the legs would be, instead of at the head like all the other attacks we see.

My point here is that this murder makes very little sense if John is supposed to have caused it. Because of all that, to me, this represents John taking the fall for Mikoto's one kill. Unlike the other John murders, which show the "victim" and make physical sense, this one doesn't show the victim and has inconsistencies because John didn't do it. The murder was originally in the white windows, and John is scrambling to make it look like it happened on the black windows, even though that doesn't really work as shown by the diagram above.

Am I taking these scenes too literally? Maybe, but even symbolically, what does it mean if blood appears when the windows are white? Surely there's at least a chance it's Mikoto doing this murder.

Point #3: 3rd Anniversary artwork

Let's first establish what the 3rd anniversary art usually represents. It's been pointed out by many before me that these pieces are closely connected to the prisoners' murders. This is clearest with Muu, Amane and Kotoko.

Muu is wearing her school outfit, but she has a shoe off, just like she did when she killed Rei.

Amane is wearing her Magic outfit, but she's holding her thunder wand, which places this image near her murder. Specifically right before her murder, as she's still wearing her black bow tie instead of her cloud medal thing.

Kotoko is holding her Jacques Roulet cap, a hat she usually only uses alongside her blue and yellow jacket. The only exception is during her murder, where she's wearing the outfit we see in the anniversary artwork while the cap rests on the floor.

The others all hold up with this hypothesis. Yuno is wearing her yellow shirt, the one she's wearing in Tear Drop near the end when she lets out a tear, presumably representative of her murder. Fuuta is wearing the hoodie and mask he wears throughout Bring it On, and he's holding his phone, which does fit doxxing Killcheroy even though it's more generic. Kazui and Mahiru are wearing the outfits they wear in the scenes of their respective lovers' death. Haruka wears his Weakness plain white outfit, which could point to any moment of his narrative, including the murder. And the only times we see Shidou physically kill (cutting off flowers), he's wearing the floral jacket he wears in the artwork.

I want to be clear. For most of them, the relation to the murder could just be because they don't have many outfits in their MVs. However, Muu's, Amane's and Kotoko's feel extremely intentional, and the fact none of the other ones contradict this trend makes it feel like it could be universal.

Which gets us to Mikoto's artwork. And in his artwork, he's holding (what looks to be) a vape pen. John smokes cigarettes, so that's definitely Mikoto. In the murder artwork. So, uh. Yeah. That certainly feels like he must have killed at least one person.

The only small contradiction is that his beanie is nowhere to be found, which is why I don't consider this definitive. However, the fact they specifically chose to make Mikoto hold a vape pen when every other prisoner can easily be connected to the murder feels... intentional.

Point #4: Swing and a hit

More Double screenshots.

So a few weird things. For starters, let's get something straight: there's two murders depicted here. Notice how the first image shows a Kayano swinging with a right-handed swing, then the second shows John (black windows) doing a left-handed swing. The important thing isn't the type of swing, but the fact they're different.

(I know I made some posts at one point about dominant hands, but as my beloved and extremely smart mutual accirax pointed out a lot of the time Milgram characters switch hands because it looks better for the animation, so they're sorta ambidextrous by default lol)

It's not hard to realize if you try to follow the motion yourself. The only way this works is if he swings one way, then the other, which doesn't fit the fact all mannequins are usually destroyed after just one hit. And it's not like it's an animation issue: you can literally fix this by flipping the image.

... Okay it does look a bit awkward but I think it works well enough. It's less weird than the swing changing mid-way through.

To me, this is similar to what I talked about before with the white window murder. John's subconscious trying to convince itself this was John by thinking back to a different murder that has nothing to do with this one. I have no idea if that makes sense.

And then there's the fact the background in the first image is pure white. This doesn't have to mean the one fronting is Mikoto, but why leave it ambiguous if it would have worked perfectly fine with black windows in the background?

Hell, actually, who says we're on the train? This is the only scene in the entirety of Double (apart from the mom phone call) where it's unclear whether we're on the train or not. And as we established, if there is a murder outside the train, it would probably be Mikoto murdering.

And don't get me started on the blood, the eye, and the noise in the background.

First, the background noise in this scene famously has baby crying noises. Could it be we're witnessing John's "birth"? Because if that's the case, then either John was born during the phone call with the mother, which doesn't make a whole lot of sense if you think about it, or John was born during or after the murder on screen.

This actually fits with the close-up of the eye. Despite the fact that "right-hand swing Kayano" seems pretty chill as he attacks the mannequin, right as the scene end, his pupils become smaller as if he's surprised by something. But what would he be surprised about? To me, it feels like "right-hand swing Kayano" was perhaps dissociating (I think that's the right term, please correct me if I'm wrong), and then John is born. Naturally, John gets surprised by the fact the first thing he sees is a dead person, explaining the odd reaction.

Funnily enough, this is actually supported by the very strange blood behavior. It's hard to describe, so bear with me. You see how there's one big orb at the center of the screen? And it starts with one small drop, which enters the orb, and then three small droplets come out the other side? Uh... Diagram?

This isn't normal blood behavior, of course (<- not that I know what normal blood behavior actually is, but I know how liquids work and this ain't it). It's imagery of something splitting, which in the context of alters, fits alongside the baby noises and the weird reaction to murder. Although I fully acknowledge the blood thing falls into the territory of "am I reading too much into this or is Milgram just insane?", so you know. Take it with a few metric tons of salt.

(Funnily enough, it does split into three things. Trikoto win? It doesn't convince me, but the interpretation is valid)

To recap, we have a strange murder with a white background, possible misdirection by showing a completely unrelated murder performed by John, baby noises, imagery of something splitting, and a reaction to the murder which could support an alter being born in that very moment. All of this could imply this "right-hand swing murder" is the moment John is born, which would mean the actual murderer is Mikoto.

Point #5: The tarot spreads in MeMe

This one is very abstract, but it can definitely point to Mikoto murdering someone. Take a look at the two different spreads we see in the first chorus (the first one flashes twice but it's the same).

These things are really complicated, and I should probably do a post about them at some point, but I'm gonna focus on the main things, that being the changes between the two spreads.

For starters, we see that the "querent" card, the one in the middle of The Wheel, is the reversed Hanged Man. Since this is the portrait besides The Fool in the water world thing, it can be assumed the reversed Hanged Man represents Mikoto. Thus, these are his spreads.

Then, the Outcome card of the first spread is the Devil. Since the Devil card on its own also flashes after the second spread, it can be assumed the Devil is also the Outcome of the second spread, as that's the only card which is not visible. Then, as stated before, the Devil card is related to John. This means the Outcome of the situation depicted in these spreads is John. In other words, this is the situation which led to John appearing.

Now we have to establish how we're supposed to read these things. I've explained it in another post, but basically, the only way we can tell how we're supposed to read the cards in The Wheel is by knowing the order they're drawn, so we can determine if the meaning is based on position or draw order (long story). We can do this by looking at the final spread, where it appears the cards are drawn Bottom->Right->Left->Top. This doesn't exactly fit any common way of drawing them, so we read based on position. Aditionally, since this is Japanese media and the card to the right is drawn before the card on the left, middle row of The Wheel is Future&lt;-Present<;-Past. And based on the way the upright Page of Pentacles is placed in the final spread, if the name of the card is to the left the horizontal card is upright, if not it's reversed. If that doesn't make any sense to you, don't worry too much about it, I'll walk you through the important parts. You want a diagram? No? Well, you're gonna get one so-

After clarifying that, we can see that in these two spreads, while most of everything remains consistent, the Future and the Conscious change, the Challenge flips, and the Attitude is revealed. Let's take it one step at a time.

Let's start with the first spread. In the Challenge position (horizontal middle), we have the upright Queen of Swords. This card can represent anything you want tarot reading is so annoying a couple of things, including an authority figure. In the Challenge position, it could indicate there is a lack of communication, that the querent is being too "cold", in the sense they're not expressing their emotions correctly.

Then, in the Conscious position, the thing Mikoto is actively working towards, we have the Ace of Cups. This card can represent new beginnings, new relationships, good fortune, basically "good new things are coming your way." However, there is a slight change between MeMe's Ace of Cups and the IRL version, which could change the meaning a bit.

(No I don't know why MeMe calls it "Cup of Ace" that's just wrong lol)

As you can see, the IRL version has the water from the cup spilling on its own, while the MeMe version has the cup being intentionally spilt on top of a few mannequins. What I think this could mean: if you take the water spilling as a good thing (which is how it's usually interpreted, the idea is that spirituality is overflowing or something like that), the IRL version shows that new good things are coming no matter what, while the MeMe version has the water spilling intentionally because Mikoto is actively trying to cause new, good developments, such as new relationships (we'll get there). That's also why it's in the Conscious position, Mikoto is consciously trying to build a good new relationship.

After that, in the Future position, we have the reversed Wheel of Fortune. This can mean a lot of things, but it mainly has to do with a negative cycle in someone's life. In the Future position, then, this could mean a perpetuation of a negative cycle in Mikoto's life. Thus, in the first spread, if things continue as they are in that moment, the cycle of abuse Mikoto suffers at work will continue.

The Attitude card is obscured. I should note that this card can actually be read in a few different ways, but I think "Attitude" fits best here.

I'll also note the Subconscious card at the bottom of the Wheel ("so below") is the reversed Ten of Wands, which can represent Mikoto is feeling overburdened. Which we know certainly applies to his work.

Let's see here. Mikoto has a problem, possibly with someone in a position of authority, and feels overburdened. This could point to the Queen of Swords being a boss or a manager or something like that. It's upright because Mikoto isn't being direct enough in his desires; he's trying to 'play nice' and build up his relationship with the "Queen", that's what the Ace of Cups could represent. Not like I think his situation would actually improve if he told this "Queen" that he felt overworked, but still, the idea that Mikoto is bottling up his emotions definitely fits what we see of him. If he keeps it up, the cycle of (workplace) abuse will continue, represented by the reversed Wheel of Fortune. This would lead to Mikoto's darkest desires exploding; the Devil is the Outcome.

Let's move to the second spread. The Challenge is still the Queen of Swords, but reversed. This could imply the person giving Mikoto problems is still the same, but now the issue is that Mikoto is being too emotional. Again, there are a lot of ways to read these things, but I think that works.

The Conscious card is now the reversed Wheel of Fortune, which could mean Mikoto is actively aware of and possibly trying to break the negative cycle he's in.

The Future is now the Ace of Cups, which could imply there is a new relationship in Mikoto's future. This is where we acknowledge that the water can also represent consciousness, and in the MeMe version, it is being spilt over mannequins. And...

*sigh* The Ace of Cups can be associated with pregnancy, which fits the whole "newborn" thing John's got going on.

Indeed, I believe the new relationship in Mikoto's future is John, a "mannequin" receiving "consciousness." There is no other thing this could really allude to besides Milgram, which I don't think these spreads reference. However, if this really is about John, that would mean this spread is showing a situation before John's birth.

The Attitude card, which (according to most sources, there are conflicting reports on what the first card of The Wand is) represents how the querent is trying to achieve their Conscious goal, is the reversed King of Cups. This is most often associated with emotional repression, but it can also be connected to violence. Which is very interesting, because John has the same Attitude card in his spread. And we know how he approaches his issues (violence).

So all in all, Mikoto is having issues with an authority figure, and he's (possibly) being emotional about it. He's trying to break out of a negative cycle, and he's doing this either by repressing his emotions or by pulling a John (violence). In the future, this will lead to John's birth, which is why the Outcome is still implied to be the Devil.

This, by itself, doesn't necessarily imply murder. Again, the Attitude could be emotional repression and not violence. The weird thing is that the spread changed. And that means something had to happen to get the Future to change. The change can't have been John being born; that's still in the Future. And the thing we know happened is that the Conscious goal Mikoto was working towards changed, from wanting a prosperous new beginning or relationship to destroying an existing cycle.

Because of that, to me, it feels like the change between the first spread and the second is that Mikoto decided to let his emotions take over (reversing the Queen of Swords) and killed (reversed King of Cups) the authority figure who was causing him trouble, and this caused John to be born.

The final thing to note is that John's Past card is the Wheel of Fortune (upright). This could be read to mean the situation leading up to John's current situation is the destruction of a cycle, which fits the idea that Mikoto tried to destroy it before John was born.

Is this definitive evidence? Hell no! Tarot readings are so ambiguous that I'm pretty sure you can read these to mean whatever the hell you want them to mean. This is just my take on it, I don't even necessarily consider it good evidence because again, if you just take different meanings from the cards you can get whatever. But it's still something.

Point #6: John's insistence

Let's see what John says about the murders again.

[Neoplasm] Es: Can I ask… why you killed them? John: They annoyed me. Es: Who did you kill? John: Just someone who was walking around nearby. Es: … How many did you kill? John: Can't remember. I was first born back then, you know. It's kinda fuzzy.

So, as stated, John may have killed people without fully knowing why Mikoto was angry at them, but that doesn't mean this makes perfect sense. We know their victims weren't just "someone who was walking around nearby". Unless Mikoto regularly carries around a metal baseball bat for some god-forsaken reason, there must have been some kind of premeditation at play. John has to at least be hiding the real reasons for the murders, possibly because Mikoto might consider them shameful (more on that in a bit). This opens the door to the possibility he's hiding more than just that, and that makes a lot of his other claims seem a bit... desperate.

[Neoplasm] John: From [Mikoto's] point of view, he's being blamed for a crime he can't even remember. Es: If that's the truth, then… you're the one who committed the murder? John: Yeah, it's me. I killed them off. Es: … John: So Mikoto really didn't do it. Es: Is this really something that works that conveniently? John: Just put yourself in Mikoto's shoes for a moment! He was bottling up all his stress! He kept dealing with it all by himself the whole time, until it exploded! It's not like he just decided that he wanted to hurt somebody! Es: … John: He's not the type of person who could do stuff like that! He always looks out for others, always reads the room, always tries to get along with people around him! He can't do stuff like that… He was on the verge of exploding! That's why I was born. It's terrible, isn't it? My other self didn't do anything! Es: Even if that's true… Even if it wasn't what Mikoto wanted – someone's life was still lost. [...] John: I'm the one who did it! Mikoto didn't do it! You know that because of MILGRAM! I don't care about the law, I want to know what you think! Es: … John: Please… forgive Mikoto. I'm the one who did it.

The amount of times John tries to take the fall for every single murder is so insane it makes it sound suspicious. Why does he say it so much?

Still, I'll be honest, this might just be confirmation bias, as a lot of these lines can still absolutely be read with the interpretation that John is the only killer.

John: If I, the "John" personality, hadn't been born, I'm sure Mikoto would have reached his limit and fallen apart. Es: John… you… John: It's true that I was the one who wanted to destroy everything… and the weakness of Mikoto, who couldn't stand up for himself all alone, might have been the origin of that. But… that's all there is to it. Is that a sin?

So I don't consider this evidence at all, frankly. In fact, Neoplasm is one of the things which make me doubt the Mikoto-killer theory a bit, but I don't think it outright deconfirms it or anything. I'm just including this because I know some people think he's extremely suspicious here.

Point #7: Small visual stuff

1- The first time we see victims in Double, John's bat doesn't have any blood on it, which could imply the one who killed the mannequin(s) beside him was Mikoto.

2- The mannequin standing in for Death in the Death card is blue, a color most associated with Mikoto.

This one isn't great because you can read it more symbolically, with Mikoto being the main force of change in the system's life instead of someone who brings death. Though I'd argue the mace thing sort of implies something more violent.

3- At the start of Double, we see this:

The guy is shown as a blue and red mannequin, but what's interesting is that the blue part has a skull and the red part has a map thing. I don't consider this very important, but the blue with the skull could be indication of Mikoto having killed someone.

4- In Double, Mikoto is represented by antlers (I think that's what they are) in the same way John is represented by a crown of thorns ("savior", etc).

Antlers mainly represent strength, which feels a bit weird for Mikoto. I'm gonna be honest, I'm not confident on what these represent. But one possible interpretation comes from the fact they are always paired with the lyric (written on screen) "All I did was dream, so you find me INNOCENT, it’s that simple right?". The connection of the antlers with Mikoto's dream could imply Mikoto tried to use strength to fulfill a dream, which could imply he murdered someone to achieve something. Additionally...

*sigh* Antlers fall off after mating season, which could be connected to Mikoto "losing his antlers" after John is born, since Mikoto doesn't have to kill anymore.

I'm sure there are other interpretations, but I don't think this one is too bad.

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So, all of this, is it conclusive evidence of anything? I wouldn't say so, it's all still pretty vague. However, I believe all of it together points to Mikoto having killed one person, and this is what explains all this in the best way. Thus, I presume Mikoto did kill someone.

Claim #4: Mikoto's Motivations

CW for this section: potential stalking

I've sorta alluded to it in the tarot section, but I believe Mikoto killed someone in a position of authority over him as a result of workplace abuse. In particular, Mikoto was heavily overworked, possibly to the point this authority figure was somehow monitoring his home life and possibly even stalking him.

Let's start by the workplace abuse thing. This is an extremely important point in Mikoto's narrative; it's referenced in his Undercover silhouette shot, it's shown in the messages from "Chief" at the start of Double, the neuron scene from Double, his interrogation questions, etc. Mikoto is being overworked, to the point his boss/manager/whatever talks to him about work past midnight. It would be very strange, narratively speaking, if all of this didn't have anything to do with the murder. Also the whole "Queen of Swords is the Challenge/problem" could allude to an authority figure, which also fits this idea.

So then, what about the monitoring/stalking? Well, there's a lot of camera imagery in MeMe, for one. Most notably in the scene when Mikoto comes home and leaves his bag to the side as he breaks down, relating his stress to the idea of being watched. There's also an abundance of eye imagery in Double, especially in relation to Mikoto. This is also included in the MVs version of the Hanged Man card, which has a bunch of eyes around the mannequin. This alludes to some form of judgement or pressure, (<- Fuuta reference?) which could be connected to either societal pressure or, what I find a bit more likely, the judgement of Mikoto's higher-up(s) in his workplace.

Because of this, I believe one of Mikoto's higher-ups was heavily monitoring Mikoto's life even outside of work, which drove him to the point he felt he had to get rid of them. All he did was dream... of a better life.

This could also be why John hides the reasons for the murders. Even if he is actually aware of the full situation, he could be trying to hide that Mikoto felt tired from work, because in a way it's possible Mikoto would consider that shameful. I hope that makes sense.

Claim #5: Which is Mikoto's kill?

Assuming Mikoto only killed one person before John started taking over murder duties-

(I think that's a fair assumption, I think it would be weird if John only split after like three murders. Like, oh the first two weren't stressful enough to cause a split, but the third one is too much? What? There's something else that makes me think John split after just the first one, we'll get there)

-that begs the question: which one was Mikoto's? Well, since Double isn't exactly reliable for what the murders looked like, I'll only take MeMe's versions into account. There are at least three murders in MeMe: the Subway Murder, the Streetside Murder, and the Trash Bag Murder.

We know the Trash Bag Murder is different from the other two because the murderer isn't wearing a hoodie in that one, a fact which took me an embarrassing amount of time to notice. Unless he went home, changed, went back to dispose of evidence and still had the beanie for some reason (since he throws it away), it has to be different. And probably on a different day, too. Because of that, I'll henceforth call it the No Hoodie Murder.

Let's run through what we have. We see the Subway murder almost in full at the beginning of MeMe, where Kayano swings around his bat flippantly before killing a blonde dude with a simple overhead swing. However, right in the middle of that scene, we quickly cut to the Streetside murder, where we see Kayano hitting the victim with a right-handed swing.

After that we have a scene of John (because at this point it would be John) coming home and taking off his shirt. Since there is a Fool card portrait in the background, I'll call this the Fool Portrait scene. Notably, we never see John take off a hoodie or a beanie, meaning this is probably related to the No Hoodie Murder.

Then we have Kayano doing... something to the Streetside victim. It's unclear exactly what that is; I've seen some people say he's burying the victim, but to me that always looked like he's dismembering them to put them in trash bags. It's not too important, though.

An important fact is that in this scene we see his left cheek is blood-stained. This is consistent with the following bath scene, where we see John brushing his teeth with blood trailing down from his left cheek.

In the middle of those scenes, we see the clean-up for the No Hoodie murder. Trash bags and the beanie are disposed of in an illegal dumping ground.

Finally there's the bathtub scene, but frankly it's not very relevant to this discussion.

So, which one is Mikoto's? I'll start by ruling out the No Hoodie murder. There is an argument for it, though. It's definitely the most hidden of the murders, which makes it suspicious. Since the Fool represents new beginnings, you could argue the Fool Portrait scene shows John's "beginning". And since I said it's probably related to this murder, you could argue that means the No Hoodie murder is the first one.

However, that doesn't really convince me. Unless the Kayanos have multiple beanies (which is possible, but I'd find it weird narratively speaking), this would have to be the last murder in the sequence, while Mikoto's would have to be the first. The fact it was done without a hoodie also contradicts the 3rd Anniversary artwork reasoning, since Mikoto wears a hoodie there, but to be fair the lack of beanie makes the outfit somewhat inconsistent anyways.

Meanwhile, you could argue there's a symbolic implication that John and Mikoto have already split by the time the Subway murder happens, in the way the towers close and behind Kayano have lighting split down the middle between red and blue light.

(Yes this is one of the reasons I'm keeping the red and blue color scheme despite no longer believing RGBkoto)

No, I believe the Streetside murder is Mikoto's. It's technically the first one we see, but more importantly, the location matches Mikoto's prisoner card image, and the swing fits the Undercover kill-shot.

Since Mikoto is the Milgram prisoner, these two things would probably be related to his murder, not Johns'.

Funnily enough, you can also argue that this murder is too expressionless for John. Which sounds odd, considering John is usually the less expressive of the two, but funnily enough, the only times we see John express emotion is when he goes to do a violence, either because he's frustrated at the person who hurt Mikoto or because he's happy to protect him.

[John Doe] John: SHUT YOUR MOUTH!!! Es: *Gasp* John: YOU KEEP BLABBERING ON AND ON... I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! *John continues to beat Es* John: GOING ON, AND ON, AND ON... ALL HIGH AND MIGHTY... LIKE YOU AREN'T JUST A KID! SERVES YOU FUCKING RIGHT! Es: …emember… John: HUH-!? I CAN'T HEAR YOU! YOU'RE NO MORE THAN JUST A KID. YOU UNIMPORTANT BRAT! Es: .........I'll remember you… you murderer…! John: HUH?! *Laughter* YOU PREFER IT WHEN IT HURTS MORE, HUH? Es: ......! John: THAT'S FINE... I'LL CRUSH YOUR FUCKING FACE. Es: Go ahead… and try… John: YOU DON'T NEED TO TELL ME TWICE! *Screams* [...] Kotoko: His technique is definitely that of an amateur… John: SHUDDUP!!! Kotoko: ...! *Sighs* I can't imagine that power from his muscle mass. John: ANNOYING... YOU'RE ANNOYING...! ARGH...!

This even fits the lackadaisical twirling of the bat in the Subway murder. It's one of the reasons I believe that one's John's.

Meanwhile, the one time we see a Kayano swing a bat without emotion on his face is the right-hand swing in Double, which as we established is probably Mikoto. Thus, the idea that John shows more expression than Mikoto when it comes to murdering holds up. The punch at the end of MeMe doesn't count because that's John attacking Mikoto, which is only metaphorical.

Still, this isn't exactly great evidence of anything, since John is still usually less expressive than Mikoto in general.

Anyways, which murder is Mikoto's isn't too important anyways, this section was more to satisfy curiosity than anything else.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And that's it! Again, this is just my interpretation and theories, it's perfectly fine if you believe something else. I know it isn't anything new, but I wanted to put it all in one place so I can reference back to it if, say, I'm answering an ask about whether or not I forgive the prisoners' murders (I swear I'm working on it lol). Anyways, take care!

[chaoticornot]

Chaotic rambles 9-1-1

s08e06 I am so excited, Bummy bones please. Not what I expected of this episode. Is this an old emergency, I though I read something about that? Omg, not the urn. She's hot. Buck with quarter sleeves, oof. Their thumbs up, idiots. Karma.

Confession!! Is that hot priest? He loves Chris so much, aww. His teary eyes, kill me now. You haven't heard that before, have you?

Btw, Maddie looks so good this season. It was 3 months?? Are we having this conversation, omg. Chim's face.

Is that the same restaurant?? Doesn't Buck hate basketball? So, it was a goft for Tommy. Is this the secret, omg, wait, were our theories correct and was Abby the same person?? OMG, i am freaking out, shaking, unbelievable, wait. The realisation on Buck's face. Hot waiter, hello.

There went his intestions. Why is Eddie's hair so slicked back? He looks hot regardless, but it's weird.

Buck, Maddie, Josh conco. I love you Maddie. The hope in Josh face. Josh asking the hard hitting questions. Maddie is like, he's slaying. I love Josh. I love that, that is the part Maddie is focused on.

I love them. No, you are worried about your wife, that's normal. Why does their bed look cramped?

The tank, aahhh. Mama, there is a hot priest behind you, haha. If father priest would get together with Eddie, would Eddie then be mother? Mother Diaz, love it. Sorry, I'm shitting, buddie for life, but the thought was hilarious. Eddie is like, what do you want? I'm straight, omg, he has never said that before. Sexuality arc coming up. Who love you, debatable, they hate him. He got called handsome by the hot priest. Call him out. Tell him, yess. Is he blushing a little?

Big brother is right, fuck that shit. The pipe, oh no. Unsafe practices. What secrets will be uncovered? At least he can't cute the wire. Aww, Chim is thinking about that second kid.

That shirt, oh lord. I'm the himbo. omg. Did he decorate the loft? You don't act like you're comfortable with him? Here we again, where did we hear that before? Oh god, this is exactly what happened with Taylor, oh no. At least with Taylor they were together for a while. He's gonna say no. He is overdoing it now. Who the fuck is Evan? At least Tommy is reasonable, he's right, I will admit that just this once. Bummy bones!!! Omg. We thought it, but we were right. I thought that maybe they would drag it out a bit more.

Not what I expected from Madney this season, but I love it. I hate that narrative, but this is sweet. Thank you Maddie for saying that. Ahhh, she's pregant, omg. Did not expect that, yayy. Look at them, ahhhh.

He's shaving. Omg, shirtless, haha. Look at him, he looks so young. Hugh Grant in Love actually. I love himmm. He deserves this so much. I am in love with him, aghh. Look at him go. I know Ryan loved this. Look at his smile. Who is that? I hope it's Buck, could be me though. Yess, it is him, why did he ring the bell though? Maybe that was an intentional choice. Maybe, because neither of them are in a relationship, so walking in with your key feels a lot more real, huh. The eye contact insane. This fit is so good on Eddie, they made my dreams come though with this one. If I now, don't see a million fics with Eddie in Buck's shirt, I will crash. Please, my beautiful fic writers, please, I need it. The way he walked over the couch, and Buck was not fased at all. I think you can see here, that he already feels so much lighter, because Eddie from a week ago would never. I am smiling so hard, but also crying, oof. The only thing that could make this better is it being Buck's shirt. I love everything about his episode, my dreams have come true.

[slutnali]

here to help you procrastinat,e 'm bringing my favorite numbers: 5, 7, 11, 12, 14, 15, 21, 23, 27! (i don't remembr the highest number dlfklsd) + one extra if you wanna do one. i'll take halldoll, sashnetra and rosenali in bakernali

mar ilysm jrguberibf 💓 read more bc it's long. these answers are mostly halldoll & rosenali but the last one has cc sashnetra in it <3

5. Which one tries to make food for the other but burns it all by accident and which one tells them that it’s okay and makes them both cookies?

This has Jai and Nicky written all over it. Jai's the one that burns it and Nicky's the one that bakes cookies to comfort her about it rotegbuib

7. Which one constantly wears the other’s clothes?

Jai and Nicky steal and wear each others clothes ALL the time. Whether it's intentional or not, who knows and it's partly an inconvenience before they move in together.

For bakernali au, Nali for sure wears Rosie's clothes to wear around the apartment and Rosie loves to see it 🥰 its cute but also hot

11. If they were about to rob a museum, which one does backflips through lasers and which one is strolling behind with a bag of chips?

Nali would do backflips through lasers because she's extra and Rosie would be the one strolling behind... Mostly because she cant do flips rerbguiebr

12. Which one of your OTP overdoes it on the alcohol and which one makes the other stop drinking?

Nicky overdoes it and she tries her best to hide it but Jai can always tell.. Her eyes always look so glossed over, cheeks all rosy, hiccuping and getting sappy over little things egibueuirfb but thats her girl and she hands her a bottle of water while listening to Nicky being cheesy

14. Which one keeps accidentally using the other’s last name instead of their own?

Jaida for sure keeps accidentally using Nicky's last name and it always makes Nicky's heart flutter whenever she catches it.. she's gonna marry tf out of her!!

15. Which one screams about the spider and which one brings the spider outside?

Jai screams about the spider because she's such a scaredy cat and Nicky freaks out too but she puts on her big girl pants to bring it outside because if not, who else will? Jackie said they had to deal with it 😭

21. Who gets attacked by a bully and who protects them?

Nali would for sure protect Rosie if someone made some dumbass comment about her or them, she'll throw hands with anyone for her woman even tho rosie could defend herself 🥹🥰

23. Who comes home from work to see that the other one bought a puppy?

Jai would get a puppy to surprise Nicky, they'd been talking about getting one eventually but Jai spontaneously decided to speed up the process to surprise her girl

27. Which one would give the other a makeover if they asked?

This one automatically made me think about cc sashnetra.. can you imagine Sasha asking Neech to paint her ??????? Lets go insane thinking about it 😌

[elysianslove]

the little things ; haikyuu boys

synopsis; the little things he does that show just how much he loves you

pairings; karasuno x reader, aoba johsai x reader, fukurodani x reader, nekoma x reader, shiratorizawa x reader

genre; fluff

warnings; will make u hate being single <3

karasuno ━━

sugawara koshi; whenever your hair gets caught in anything, he’s so gentle yet quick at fixing it. if your hair is long, and you pull a bag or a shirt and your hair gets tucked in, he’ll wordlessly pull it out. if your hair is short and a bracelet or zipper gets caught he just continues whatever he was doing (talking to someone else for e.g.) while helping you out. also always makes sure your hair isn’t bothering you; if you’re leaning over writing something, he’ll always tuck it behind your ear so lovingly ahhh

daichi sawamura; massages. he’s descended from heaven for this purpose only. his hands are rough and like hard on your muscles, but it’s so perfect. he’ll approach you when you’re in school sitting anywhere, from behind, and just knead his hands into your muscles for a few seconds. euphoric. or if you live together, he always greets you with back/shoulder/neck massages in the bathtub hvjkwkd.

nishinoya yuu; always makes you try his food. always. whether it’s with a group of people or just you two, he just goes “hey babe open ur mouth” with this face ��� bc he’s cheeky, and just shoves a mouthful of food. spoiler alert, it’s always way too hot. but it’s just tradition at this point. he takes a bite of his food, decides if it’s worthy enough for your mouth or not, then just. yeah.

kageyama tobio; buys you a snack whenever he gets his milk. if you’re special special, he’ll buy you your own carton of milk. he goes up to the vending machine and automatically thinks of you when he sees your fave snack, and it’s like mindless at this point he just routinely does it. it still surprises you to this day, even when he’s so nonchalant about it.

tsukishima kei; kisses your forehead. tsukki is not too big on pda, and even privately he’s not very touchy feely either tbh. but just a simple peck on your forehead grounds you, and it’s a small reminder of the fact that despite his outward coldness, he really does love you. he rarely does it in front of others, but sometimes, he’ll indulge both you and him, and settle a small kiss on your temple just randomly.

asahi azumane; anime jesus always has a hair tie/clip carried around for you on his wrist/in his pockets. i mean he’s always needing them, he just stocks up when he starts dating you. somehow he’s always there when you’re frustrated with your hair all over the place what a savior. later on it evolves to him carrying around your scrunchie and yes the boys make fun yes he blushes but no he does not take it off.

tanaka ryunosuke; carries you on his back, or your things, when you’re too tired to walk. whether that be if you’re too tired because of your heels or you’re just lazy, he just loves helping you out what a respectful gentleman. honestly it just becomes that every time he sees you he like barricades over to you so quick and flips you onto his shoulder or spins you around. anyways. walking with tanaka means walking empty handed bc he will never let you carry anything. ( shifts pile of bags on one arm just to hold your hand ).

hinata shoyo; learns hairstyles to try on you. whether it be short hair or long hair, expect his youtube search history to look a lot like “how to make a french braid” or “cute hairstyles for short hair for your cute girlfriend”. he’s always so entranced by you and watches so carefully whenever you do anything on your hair, and he gets do excited whenever you let him try and he gets it right. also !!! a lot of the times you’ll sit between his legs and he’ll just softly card his fingers through your hair or lightly braid it.

yamaguchi tadashi; buys you flowers a lot. he doesn’t overdo it, just so it doesn’t lose its value and worth. but for example, mondays suck ass and he knows how much you hate them, so he always makes sure to either leave a single rose on your desk/in your locker or give it to you himself if he can. it’s so endearing and motivating honestly, and the constant reminder every once in a while is so cute. continues to do it even like 3 years in, which is so fkn sweet honestly.

nekoma ━━

kuroo tetsurō; plans the best dates. seriously. like not one moment spent with him is dull. i don’t think being with kuroo entails a high energy relationship, i just mean that even a walk in the park is fun with him. he also always knows when to plan a fancy dinner and when it’s just something casual. like he always puts in so much effort, gives 120%, for every date with you. is your favorite band/singer/artist in town? he’s got tickets. the weather is amazing? you’re going to the beach. you’re sleep deprived? nap dates. 10/10

kozume kenma; he teaches you how to play his games. the fact that he’s letting you touch the console in itself says enough, but whenever he buys a new one, and learns it thoroughly enough, he will always sit by you and teach you its ways. picture you sitting in his lap while he guides your hands <333 if you’re not a gamer, he’s actually v flattered by the fact you’re willing to sit through this w him. but if you are a gamer, expect daily competitions. oh and if you beat him? you’re dead to him :).

haiba lev; instead of reaching for things that you’re too short for to grab it himself, he just lifts you up lmfao. i mean w the way he teases yaku, i can imagine he’d be v teasing with you as well if you’re even an inch shorter than him. but fret not! it’s all in the name of love. he’s very loving though, and if he sees you struggling he’ll just wordlessly hoist you up from your waist or something. at first it’s terrifying, but later on it just makes you giggle cause he’s like so willing to do it and it’s effortless for him hehe.

yaku morisuke; always makes sure you’re taking care of yourself, but kinda aggressively? lmao anyways. like he’s always “babe have u eaten” and if u say no expect him to start yelling like “what do you mean no??? are you insane???” v dramatic but honestly <333 he’s always texting you after parting ways “did you get home safe” or on weekends where he cant meet you, he’s asking how it was, if you indulged yourself a bit, relaxed. it’s very sweet and he makes sure it’s not overbearing. he just wants his baby to be healthy and happy.

yamamoto taketora; walks on the side with the cars. it’s not a very noticeable thing, but you see it, and you recognize it. he makes sure he’s always walking where cars are speeding by, a hand on the small of your back guiding you away and to the other side of him. it’s the little notions of protectiveness like if he’s driving and stops suddenly, he’ll put a hand out to keep you from lurching forward, he pushes you gently out of the way before you bump into someone. things like that.

aoba johsai ━━

oikawa tōru; he doodles in your notebooks, or on your skin. if you have class with him, and sit next to him, he’ll always be doodling on your notebook like little hearts or stupid, cute things like your initials + his in a heart. or if you’re at a study date together, and you’re focused on your laptop screen, he’ll leave little encouraging messages on your notes for you to notice when you’re revising. sometimes you’ll be sitting with him at lunch or even if you’re out w him and a bunch of other people, and he happens to have a pen. expect a little smiley face on your inner wrist, or a heart plus his initials ( o.t. )

iwaizumi hajime; he helps you take off your make up/takes it off for you. if you’re too sleepy, he’ll just take the products he’s used to seeing you use and start following it step by step after he props you up next to the sink. while he stands between your thighs he just so gently starts rubbing at your skin and washing away the make up. if you’re already asleep, he’ll have to like google the steps oh my god im gonna cry hes so cute. if you don’t necessarily wear make up, then he’ll just help you do your nightly routine, or even your shower routine, like using a body scrub or a face mask or, bruh, even shaving lmfao.

hanamaki takahiro; saves everything you buy/send/make him. i mean everything. has literally over two thousand photos of you, all the polaroids or postcards are saved in a little box he has under his bed. anything you make him (unless it’s edible) he has. if you make him a small embroidery thing he will literally attach it to his sports bag or something. any chain you make him is automatically added to his keychain. that flower crown you made with him on one of your first dates? he still has it. the flowers are dead but the memory loves babyyyy

matsukawa issei; carries extra clothes of his for you to borrow. hey have i mentioned that mattsun is big? 😃 because he is 😃. meaning regardless of your size or height or whatever, his clothes will drown you <3 i see him as preferring more oversized or just loose shirts rather than tight ones, so yk. on you???? if y’all are just hanging out and you even think about being slightly cold — here have five options of mattsun’s clothes to choose from. he always makes sure they smell like him too. it’s self indulgent really, because he loves the way they look on you, and he loves that it leaves a trace of his scent on you. territorial? i think yes.

fukurodani ━━

bokuto kōtarō; always hugs you like it’s the last time he’ll see you. sometimes, even if he doesn’t know it, you need his hugs badly. y’all are gonna try and tell me bokuto doesn’t give the best fkn hugs??? yeah get outta here with that bs. he SO does. he either kneels down and wraps his arms around your waist, picks you up, and spins you around, like he hasn’t seen you in 3 years, or he’ll just wrap his arms around your neck and pull your head to his chest, cradling it, and just sighing like he won’t see you for the next 3 years. his hugs always make you feel so much better, even if you weren’t feeling down to begin with.  

akaashi keiji; plays with your hands and caresses them. it’s the delicate feel and gentleness of it all. akaashi’s generally an anxious person, leaving him very fidgety. but once you two get together, and he starts being comfortable with you, expect to find your hand always between the two of his, just fondling with him. he’ll trace random figurines on the back of your hand, or have his fingers ghost over your wrist and up to your fingertips. if his hands are especially shaky, expect him to just grab one of your yours and hold it tightly between the grasp of two of his. it conveys trust, and all you have to do is kiss his knuckles gently and he’s melting.

konoha akinori; he has your reminders app linked with his, and sneaks in small, motivating messages. every once in a while you’ll get a notification from the app that tells you to drink water or have a snack (or text konoha he’s bored and he misses you). also always sends you pictures to distract you from stress. like it could literally just be a picture of him smiling with a thumbs up and you’d just ,,, melt bc you love him so much.

shiratorizawa ━━

ushijima wakatoshi; he has so many plants that are named after you, or your nicknames, and he’s like so gentle with them too. like strokes their petals and speaks to them so softly, the same way he does with you. you’re honestly so curious how he hasn’t run out of names, but he’s just a genius like that. whenever you go over to his place, and he’s bought a new one, he’ll take your hand and guide you to where it’s growing and just be like “look it’s baby y/n” and you just 🥺🥺🥺

semi eita; he has a playlist on his phone, that’s constantly being updated, for you and him to listen to. the first time he showed it to you, you were stargazing and he took out his phone and headphones and was like “i made a playlist for you wanna list” and every part of your body lit up in flames im not joking. now, a lot of the times, you’re coming back home on a train, and your head is on his shoulder and you’re sharing headphones listening to the playlist. when either one of you is driving you’re blasting it (a lot of the playlist is the hsm soundtrack)

satori tendō; tendo reads people so well, and being in a relationship with him means he will read you so well. so a lot of the times, in social situations, he’ll recognize the signs of you wanting to leave, for example, or if someone’s bothering you, he’ll know exactly how to approach it too. this also entails having a lotta inside jokes hehe, and also just like. talking with your eyes. yk that thing. yeah. all you have to do is look at him a certain way, and he just knows exactly what you just said.

goshiki tsutomu; he buys the both of you this small plushie, and whenever you’re missing each other you just. squish it. and he squishes his. he would rather die than let anyone know this, but you’re not too keen on letting anyone know yourself tbh. it’s just this little thing you have, and it means a lot more to you than just this. when he first bought it he was like “look we have matching plushies” and you passed away on the spot ❤️

shirabu kenjirō; loves trying out new recipes with you. he’s not too big on cooking or baking, but there’s just something about doing it with you that really — hits the spot yk. nowadays, whenever he comes across a new recipe on social media that he thinks you’ll like he just automatically sends it to you like with no words no texts just the post and you’re like “OMG CAN WE DO THIS” and he’s like “why else would i send it. yes we can :)” hvskwkeke

end note;  thank you sm for the love on my last two posts!! i’m glad you guys enjoyed them sm. if you have any requests, they’re open and i’m happy to deliver, mwah!

[willsimpforanyone]

hi could i request leo valdez romantic hcs with a shy/anxious s/o? just fluff mainly ty! oh and gn reader

honestly i had a huge crush on leo and i am a v v anxious person lol this is perfect (he's like 25-26 in 2021 and that's fucked me up)

--------------------------------

patience of a fucking saint

originally tried to just flirt with you the way he did with other people

quickly realised that just made you feel kinda awkward

immediately felt like shit and ran to ask jason for help jason pls what do i do they're so cute but i don't know how to act like a normal person

jason tells him to chill tf out and maybe stop overdoing the flirting

do leo things

make them something, be funny, just be himself

leo figured he could do that

he could be leo

he didn't always like leo but it was much harder to be someone else

so the next time he saw you, he just smiled big and waved

cautiously you smiled back at him

he had to go to a quiet place to squee

eventually you got to the point where you were requested to help with a project that needed your help

he absolutely didn't need your help but he really wants to spend time with you

leo finds it hilarious that you look slightly out of place in his workshop

you're very hesitant touching anything

or moving too much

or breathing too hard

so he guides you over to his workbench to sit by him while he works

asks you to pass him tools

isn't patronising if you pass him the wrong tool just corrects you gently and thanks you for the right tool

ends up with you two talking for hours about your individual struggles with anxiety

leo deals with his feelings of inferiority compared to the other six in the prophecy

you tell him about your general feelings of impending doom and how they only increased with learning about the gods and all the monsters that are out to get you

by the time you get out of the workshop it's basically midnight and you've missed dinner

leo is undeterred and offers his hand to you

"do you trust me?"

you laugh at the aladdin reference

"what?"

"do you trust me?"

"...yes"

and you mean it

sneaking into the dining area to find food that hasn't been eaten is anxiety inducing but leo's hand is warm and grounding and at one point he touches your shoulder to move round you and you melt internally

it's a bonding moment for y'all

you're very close with each other

hanging out most of the time

it takes him a w h i l e to actually ask you out

because gods above he doesn't want to panic you but he really really really likes you and if he has to spend another day without being able to kiss you he will go insane

okay i've gone into enough detail about pre-relationship

his love language is physical touch he's just always been a little scared to touch anyone in case he sets them on fire

touch starved bby

so as long as you're comfortable with it he will sit you on his lap when he's focusing on a machine or whatever

it takes a little while for you to realise how touch-starved he is

it's only when you brush his hair behind his ear and he fails to supress a tiny whine that you start to be more lenient with physical contact

pls, for the love of all that is holy, play with his hair

head in your lap

he could stay there forever

some of his favourite tiny projects are making fidget toys for your anxiety

you have a collection of spinning rings that he handcrafted with tiny messages engraved on them

always asks you if you're prepared to be around people that day so he can gauge whether he can be loud and hyper around you

if it's a high anxiety day, he'll either try to be calmer or he'll go wear himself out before hanging out with you

is absolutely thrilled when he finds out you've actually figured out how to fix a few things and how to join metal or wood

if he's really bored he'll challenge you to a drawing competition because this guy has to be good at drawing to make comprehensive blueprints

insists that yours is better every time

first kiss was spontaneous

you stained your t-shirt with grease and he offered you one of his spares so you wouldn't have to go outside with a dirty t-shirt

his was a bit big for you and hung sort of mid thigh length

you looked so cute he sprung upon you with a peck on your lips

you blushed super hard and his ears caught on fire but you were actually the one to kiss him properly

finds out that he loves kissing you more than most things in the world

he just has a lot of love to give and he now has a willing participant for his affection and a victim for his hundred-mile-an-hour rants about mechanics

----------------------------------

okay this was very long for 1am i just have a lot of feelings about my boi i love him very much

thank you for requesting and i hope you enjoyed!

[dmagedgoods]

Daeran 9 and 15? 🥺

OMG thank you so much!! 🥺❤️ 9- What’s your favourite headcanon(s) for this character? I have. So many. So many. Omg, well, first 10 things coming to mind or I won't ever stop again: 1. It was in the little discussion on twitter yesterday too and actually is an important headcanon of mine: Daeran highly enjoys art. Especially theater and any performance art in general. He unironically loves a good story and great entertainment. This won’t stop him from mocking plays that overdo it with the moral message especially or those being plainly bad. 2. Daeran’s feelings for Galfrey are much more positive and deeper than he’d ever admit. I’m not even talking about his crush or anything romantic. But she is the only family member he has left who seems to be at least vaguely interested in his existence (and his wellbeing). And behind all the mockery and nasty jokes he cares for her. 3. Daeran only cries in secret, he’s great at concealing even the most painful emotions until he’s on his own. (He may allow himself to cry in front of a trusted loved one if things lead there.) 4. Quite often, he sleeps on his belly, hugging his pillow. Or the commander, if available. It's connected to a feeling of comfort and security. 5. Daeran is extremely knowledgeable, even about things he claims to despise. It’s far more fun and fulfilling to mock topics and people with their believes in using some in depth information. 6. For a noble, Daeran can cook surprisingly well. Not on a level that could compare to “grannies praised recipe” or with a meal made by someone doing it for a living, but there are a few things he’s great at preparing and he has fun doing so. 7. Another topic from twitter I’ll bring here: Daeran is pierced (or gets pierced during the game), at the very least his ears, maybe other body parts too. 😏 8. Animals like him. 9.  Daeran either sleeps naked or falls asleep fully dressed, because he’s too lazy after a long night of partying to remove his clothes, nothing in between. 10. What he accuses children of, he did himself in the past: He drew mustaches on people in boring books, but only on those who deserved it for being even more boring than the lesson he was listening to. There probably were some nasty doodles of his teachers too. 15- Favourite line of theirs? This is so hard, because he has all the best lines! Like every single one amazing. I guess I'm gonna go with those making me most emotional. The vulnerability in this moment and in his voice left me breathless and made my heart clench:

This one just had me melt entirely:

And I can't leave out my favorite proposal in the history of ever that still drives me insane in loving him:

And then there is the one where he’s so completely unapologetic regarding his whole behavior and honestly, in a way that's extremely inspiring:

Oh and of course, one of my all time faves, telling so incredibly much not only about the relationship, but about him as well:

I'll stop here, as I said, might as well quote my whole Daeran folder. 😂 Thank you again, I enjoyed this so much!!

[gucciwins]

ahh are you angel was so good!!! is it possible for you to do a follow up where he gets released from the hospital and they go back to her house and she fusses over him a lot and takes care of him and he's like really stubborn and insists on doing things himself and walking about when he really shouldn't? I LOVE YOUR WRITING BTW!!! so so so good!

Hello lovely, thank you for such a kind message. I was writing and I wanted it to be sweet but there's actually a pinch of angst involved. Anyways, if you take the time to read this I hope you enjoy firefighter harry being stubborn at home. This is a follow up to Are You Angel?

Word count: 3331

Trouble Follows

Are You Angel?

_____

Harry was living in bliss.

Although he was injured and healing nicely, the doctors have told him. He enjoyed it because he was living with his girlfriend, who cared for him and made sure he didn’t overdo it.

It’s been two weeks, and he swears he couldn’t love Y/N anymore, but it grows every day. He adored her and was so thankful for how she was caring for him. She’d make him breakfast, and they’d either share it in bed or on the couch. She made his coffee just how he liked it and left him different baked goods every few days. He’s happily putting on weight from all the treats she makes.

Then after seven-thirty, she would head to work and, like clockwork at twelve, would be making her way into the house. She’d remove her sneakers and set up the lunch she stopped by to pick up, and then she’d wake him up with soft kisses all over his face, helping him sit up because of his bruised ribs. Y/N would let him sit at the table the only time. They’d chat about how her day was going too far; then, he’d discuss the book he decided to read. He is currently reading Normal People because Y/N wanted to watch the show, but Harry said she had to wait for him to read the book so they’d be able to discuss both. Y/N thought it was the sweetest thing and smothered him in kisses. Harry likes it when she does that.

After lunch, she’d tuck him to the couch and let him rest while she made her way back to work. Then Harry spent those last few hours at home sleeping, watching Survivor, another thing Y/N got him hooked on. Harry even upgraded her Hulu because he could not deal with the commercials. He didn’t have the patience for that. Y/N told him she wanted to apply to be on any of those shows but didn't know if she’d do well; Harry doubted that. He knew she could do anything she put her mind to. Instead, she told him they should look into applying to do Amazing Race together, which he has not ventured into yet but surely will soon.

Y/N would finally come home around five, and Harry would be in the bedroom either getting ready to shower or lying in bed. He would honestly wait for her because he liked it when she helped him undress, then she’d join him in the shower where she’d let him kiss her all over. He’s honestly dying for a taste of her. The problem is the doctor does not clear him, so it’s a no to sex from her.

Honestly, the shower was part of his favorite day, he’d get to stand, and she’d just let Harry hold her. He’d whisper how he missed her. Then he’d try to tempt her by whisper sweet nothings in her ear about how he missed the taste of her on his tongue, how she could just as easily ride his face, and the one he knows that almost always gets her is how he missed being close to her, as she squeezed him tight when he slipped inside of her. She always took a step back, avoiding eye contact because she knew if she looked at the look in his eyes, she’d give in.

Y/N would look at his chest, her eyes scanning over the scars on his skin until she landed on the purple bruise of his ribs. “Not until that is healed.” She’d half-smile at him.

Today was different. He went to the doctor’s with Mitch, Y/N not being able to get out of shift as they were full of patients for the day but promised to come straight home so they could cook dinner together. He squeezed her tighter before she left this morning, hoping for good news.

Harry walked into the hospital with a smile, greeting the staff. He didn’t have to wait long until his name was called, Mitch staying in his chair, looking at a magazine of National Geographic. Harry fixed his hoodie, walking towards the nurse who guided him to room 205. Carla, the nurse, checks his blood pressure, his height, and weight letting him know he gained five pounds that the doctor would be impressed. Harry smirked, knowing he’d tease Y/N for helping him put on weight. Carla smiled and told him the doctor would be in shortly and informed him to change into the gown provided.

Dr. Vazquez walks in fifteen minutes with a knock on the door.

“Mr. Styles, good to see you.”

“You as well.” He smiles.

“Right, well looking over your charts, everything looks good but still got to look you over.”

“Go right ahead, doc.” Harry sighs with a slight grin.

Dr. Vazquez washes his hands then gloves up. He walks over to Harry, standing right in front of him. First, he looks at Harry’s arms seeing that the burns healed, with minimal scarring. Then he moves over to the gown, seeing there are no longer bruises on his leg. Harry had to do physical therapy for a week as a precaution, but he aced all the drills and then was cleared. He lifted the gown to expose his stomach.

“Does it still hurt, your ribs?” Dr. Vazquez asked as he felt around the area of the bruising.

“No.” Harry lied.

“Hmm…” Dr. Vazquez touched Harry gently on the bruise, and Harry hissed. “Think it still does. It looks like you will need that extra week to recover at least until the bruising goes away.”

“Another week,” Harry repeats.

“Yes, I want you to heal properly.”

“But my job,” Harry exclaims, not believing he has to be out for another week.

Dr. Vazquez sighs, “You’re going back to the job Harry. I understand how much it means to you. If I let you go back early, you could break a rib if you aren’t careful. Now, I want you to go home and keep doing what you’re doing. You’re in great health overall.”

“Except the bruise,” Harry mutters.

“I’ll let you get dressed. See you next week, Styles.” As Dr. Vazquez is turning the knob, he turns around. “Thank Y/N for the oatmeal cookies. They were delicious.”

Harry nods and hops down from the bench wanting to get dressed and go home.

_

Mitch drives Harry home; it’s silent all the way there until he parks in front of Y/N’s house, which is technically his. He’s not sure, but it feels like home, at least with her, it does.

“You alright, H?” Mitch asks, shifting to look at Harry.

Harry sighs, leaning his head back against the seat. “No, got another week and another checkup.”

“That’s alright; you need to heal properly,” Mitch responds.

Harry shrugs, “I guess.”

“We still on for dinner at seven?”

“Yeah.”

Harry gets out and makes his way to the front door. He sits on the couch, and the more he sits there, the angrier he becomes. He’s not mad at anyone, just the situation. Harry isn’t sure how long he sits there, letting his anger simmer, but it’s been a while because he hears the front door unlock and Y/N enter.

“Hi darling,” She greets from the door, where she slips her shoes off and sets her purse down.

Harry doesn’t answer, continues to sit there, too lost in thought.

Y/N smiles seeing him sitting there.

She hurries over him, desperate to hug him. She sits next to him on the couch, carefully slipping her arms around his waist as not to hurt him.

“Missed you.”

Harry sighs, kissing her head softly. “Me too.”

“Going to make you a tea, Ms. Waters was telling me it strengthens your bones and to make it even better, it smells like lavender although she said it might need some sugar if you don’t want it to be bitter.”

Y/N isn’t worried. Some days she comes home and does all the talking because he had a few rough days, and sometimes she’d be quiet, and Harry would cuddle her, commenting about everyone’s gameplay in Survivor.

This is the most stable relationship she’s been in. Yes, it is insane for Harry to move for the time being, but she’s not opposed to him moving in so soon. She loves him, and that means she sees a future with him. It may or may not end in heartbreak, but she wants as much time with Harry that she can get.

Harry was just as thrilled. Most of his clothes could already be found in the drawers she opened up for him. She has uniform shirts hanging in her closet. She buys his favorite fabric softener. They’ve been domestic from the start.

This is love, and she wants it for as long as Harry will give it to her.

Y/N came out with the mug, placing it on the coaster for Harry.

Harry stared at Y/N, thinking about every single thing she does for him. He was thankful he really was because he loved her, and this was showing him just how much she loved him, but he could do things independently.

Harry goes to sit up, and Y/N is there instantly to help him. Harry isn’t sure why, but it bothers him.

This seems to be the last straw after the day he had, and Harry shrugs her off.

She steps back, not a word is said.

“Y/N,”

A frown on her face, he called her by her name, not one of the sweet nicknames he has for her.

“You’re suffocating me. I can do this on my own. I’ve been hurt before, and I didn’t need you.” Harry says harshly.

Y/N flinches, taking a step back.

Harry instantly feels the guilt seeping in.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way,” She says as she takes small steps back to increase their distance. “I’m going to go for a walk.” Shoes in hand, she opens the door and walks out before Harry can say anything.

Harry sighs because he didn’t mean to make her upset. He really is a dick.

Now she’s outside and upset. Harry hates that he drove her out of her own home because of his stubbornness.

He’s not sure how to apologize, but in the meantime, Harry can think about it before she comes back.

_____

It’s been over an hour, and Harry knows she should be home soon. He tried calling and texting her, but she’s ignoring his cars, rightfully so. He feels time goes by slowly now that she isn’t there to keep him company.

Harry wants to apologize and hold her close. He misses her and her sweet smile that’s reserved just for him. He feels awful because he’s not even sure if she took a jacket, and it’s a cold night. He did this and just wants her home, even if it means her being upset with him.

There’s a knock on the door, and he rushes over to open it but frowns when he sees Mitch and Sarah.

“Well, what a welcome,” Sarah says sarcastically at his expression.

“Sorry, thought you were Y/N,” Harry sighs, moving back, allowing them to enter.

Mitch and Sarah share a look, “Shouldn’t she be here?”

“She should, but I’m a dick, and she went on a walk to get away from me.”

“Harry,”

“I know, I felt awful right away, Fuck, I’ve never yelled at her-- we don’t fight. It’s not us, and now she’s not answering my calls.”

Sarah looks around the room before her eyes land on the bag next to the mushroom key holder. “The phone that is sitting next to her bag.”

“Fuck,” Harry frowns. He picks it up, seeing all his missed calls. He scrolls then stops when he sees Frankie’s name.

With Frankie, will be home soon.

It was sent fifteen minutes ago.

“She’s with Frankie.”

Harry leans against the wall, sighing in relief. “Should we be here when she gets back?” Mitch asks.

“No, we need to talk. Raincheck?”

Sarah nods, “Of course. Keep us updated.”

“Yeah, of course.”

Mitch walks out first, then Sarah before they share a look. Sarah sighs, turning to look at Harry. “Listen, you don’t have to tell me what happened, but Y/N loves you. I’ve known her as long as you have. From the way Y/N has spoken about you to Frankie and me, it’s like you hung the moon and stars for her. It might be easy to treat her as a target but know this; she will never stand to be mistreated because she knows her worth. So, swallow your pride and fix this with your heart and not your ego.”

Sarah walks away before he can respond. Harry is about to shut the door when a car pulls up; he recognizes it as Frankie’s, a red pick-up truck.

He smiles; she’s back.

Y/N gets out of the car, greeting Mitch and Sarah with a hug. She frowns when Harry assumes they tell her they can’t stay for dinner. She pulls a bag out from the passenger seat and hands it over to them. Harry feels himself soften because even though she was upset, she still passed to get dinner.

Heart of gold she has.

She’s absolutely perfect, and he might have messed it all up.

Y/N hugs Frankie before moving towards Harry, a bag of food in her hand. She doesn’t meet his eyes but walks past him into the house.

Harry closes the door behind him and watches her set the bag of food that he can now see is Thai food from his favorite place three blocks away. She stands there, nervously playing with a robin ring on her index finger, slipping it on and off.

“Uh…you’re right, I’ve been suffocating,” she says softly.

Harry sighs, “No.” But it’s like she doesn’t hear him because she keeps going.

“I can stay with Frankie for a while, this is your home as well, and I won’t kick you out. Or, if you want your own space, Mitch said he could drive you over to your apartment. I just don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

Harry feels the tears coming, god he doesn’t deserve her or her sympathy let alone her love.

“You don’t need to go anywhere. I want you right here. Need you right here.” Harry takes a small step toward her hoping she won’t back away.

Y/N doesn’t, but she also doesn’t look at him either. It breaks his heart.

“Will you please look at me, angel?” He pleads.

She lifts her head, eyes red and swollen. He did that. He made her cry.

Maybe he does deserve to feel this hurt.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean a word I said. I was upset and angry, and I took it out on you when I shouldn’t have. It’s not an excuse for what I did, and you don’t have to forgive me, but I’m so sorry.”

“Why are you upset?”

“Ribs aren’t fully healed, and I was ready to go back to work.”

Y/N nods because she knows what he means. He was ready to go back to work because he has been spending so much time with her.

“Right, because you need to be away from me. I got it.”

“God, no. Baby, no.” Harry cups her face. “Not at all.”

“Then what, Harry!” She tries to shout, but it comes out soft as tears begin to fall down her face. “I love you, but you’re not making any sense.”

Harry sighs, “I’m afraid that if I don’t go back soon, then everyone will see me as weak, that you’ll see me as weak.”

“Harry,” she whispers.

“I know, it’s ridiculous. I love how you care for me but me not being able to do the same kills me.”

“But you do,” she smiles; it’s the first one since she came back. “You watch my favorite shows and read books I’ve read because you want to discuss them with me. You try all my desserts without a complaint. You let me take care of you. You love me because you smile at me every morning and without fail greet me with a kiss.”

Harry lets his tears fall, wanting to soak in her words. “You love me in the little moments as well as the big. I’m sorry, I left. I wanted to give you space, clear your head as I did the same without upsetting each other more.”

“I’m sorry, I pushed you out of your house.” Harry presses a kiss on her cheek. “Will you forgive me?”

“Course, H.” Y/N wraps her arms around his waist. “Don’t like fighting.” She tells him as she nuzzles her face in his chest.

“Me either.” Harry sighs in content, happy to have her back in his arms where she belongs. “Were you serious about me moving in? I mean, we’ve only been together five months now.”

“Said it in the heat of the moment.” Harry nods, not letting her see his frown. “But it doesn’t mean I didn’t mean it. Five months may seem like little time, but with everything we’ve been through, it feels much longer.”

Harry smiles, “Yeah, I hate when people say this, but I do mean it. It feels like you’ve been a part of my life from the start.”

Y/N nods, knowing what he means, “Let’s make this our home. I want you to leave your shoes by the door and help me do laundry on Sundays. I want it all with you.”

“Getting to wake up to you every day and come home to you every night, there’s nothing I want more,” Harry confesses.

“I love you, Harry.”

“And I love you, my angel.”

Harry pulls her in for a final hug, not wanting to stop touching her, just needs her in his arms for the rest of the night.

“Dinner time?” He asks.

“Yes, please.” Y/N goes to pull away, but Harry holds her tight.

She looks up at him, eyes red but no longer sad. “Kiss, please?”

Y/N smiles at him fondly, giving a slight nod. Harry leans in, brushing their lips together softly, nervous she might pull away, but she doesn’t; instead, she presses herself closer to him. It’s a kiss that centers him, that reminds him he didn’t mess it all up, that at the end of the day, she came back to him. The kiss is soft, and Harry feels all the love she’s pouring in, and Harry hopes she can feel it from him as well.

Harry pulls back, pressing a final kiss to her lips.

“Now, dinner or shower first.”

“Shower want to hold you, angel,” Harry confesses.

“Alright, but no funny business.” She teases.

Harry gasps, “I would never.”

She giggles, making her way to the bedroom, with Harry following behind.

Harry leans against the doorway, watching Y/N set her clothes for the night on the bed, then going to his drawers to do the same. He wants this forever; he wants her to fluff his pillows, to warm his blanket, to run her fingers through his hair, to massage his back, relieving all the tension he has built up. He’s decided he’d let her shower him in love and bask in it because it doesn’t mean she sees him as weak; it’s her way of showing she wants to take care of him and who is he to deny her of that.

Harry feels his heart grow when she heads to the bathroom but stops turning to him with an outstretched hand; he steps forward, intertwining their fingers.

Yeah, he’s going to love her for a long time.

_____

Here's more firefighter harry because this wrote itself and in a matter of two days. will eventually write more for firefighter harry but will be focusing on other work :)

[musicfeedsmysoul12]

13 Days of AUS: The Second Day of Christmas: A ShinDeku Dad Might AU

Summary: On the 13 days of Christmas, Music gave to me… 13 different POTSOD AUs! Each contains a different pairing and different plots but within: a collection of plot line that will appear in the main series… though have fun figuring them out! (Including a few pairings that will appear~)

ON AO3

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

The screen shows the form of All Might. He wears a white shirt and cargo pants, entering a large penthouse while wearing his trademark smile. Once he’s in, he closes the door and sighs. Then, with a small puff of smoke, he’s gone. Replaced by a skinny version, the man slumped over with an exhausted expression. 

 “Damn it,” he coughs harshly, covering his mouth with a fist. Some blood can be seen on it before he pulls out a cloth to wipe it off. There’s a small yellow biohazard bin next to the door he drops it into before he stumbles further into the apartment. He wanders past a door where the noise comes from to go to a living room. There’s a chair in the corner that has an oxygen tank next to it, along with a vital machine. He sits in the chair with a grunt and then grabs the mask connected to the tank. He breathes in, turning the machine on to do so.

 All Might sits in the chair for a few seconds before sighing and grabbing the vital machine. The small finger clamp is put on, and that machine is switched on. He sits in the chair a bit longer, eyes closed.

 “Gampa All Me-T?” A voice asks. All Might cracks open an eye. The screen moves to show a toddler next to him. The toddler has what looks to be felt like skin stitched together, combined with hair that appears to be ribbons. She holds a rabbit plush toy and looks worried at All Might through button eyes. “Owie bad today… tell mama and aun-ie.” the toddler turns and walks off carefully, calling out. “Mama! Aun-ie! Gampa owie bad!”

 A young blonde woman comes into the screen, passing by the toddler. “Good job Tomoe,” the woman praises. “Your mama is in the kitchen.” She walks towards All Might and sighs. “Papa, you’ve got to take it easier.” All Might sighs but nods. The woman adjusts her glasses and places a hand on his forehead. “You’re a little feverish. I’ll tell Izumi to make some soup.”

 “Soup?” a voice says, and a green-haired teenager steps into the screen, carrying the toddler from before. Tomoe, the toddler, holds onto the teen girl’s neck. “Did Papa overdo it again?”

 “He did.” the first woman sighed. “I’ll tell dad and Uncle Mirai about it.” All Might lifts a hand, but both girls shoot dangerous looks. 

 “You’re going to drive me and Melissa insane, Papa,” the teenager says. The hero nods his understanding. The screen pauses on him.

 “All Might! AKA: Yagi Toshinori!” the familiar voice of Present Mic declares. “Quirk: One for All! A transferable Quirk was passed onto him by his former mentor; he’s in bad shape after injuring All for One, his sworn enemy and his mentor's killer!”

 The screen switches to the blonde woman. “Shield Melissa!” Present Mic’s voice declares. “She’s the Quirkless child of All Might and his lovers, Shield David and Sarah! She’s got the brains of a genius as she works her butt off to be a support specialist!” 

 The screen switches to the green-haired teenager and the toddler. “Yagi Izumi and Tomoe! Izumi is Quirkless and All Might’s chosen successor for his Quirk! Tomoe is her daughter! Izumi’s got the guts and brains to be a hero and works hard each day to be worthy of One for All!”

 “Sorry, girls,” All Might says to his daughters. He pauses for a second. “Izumi, did your mother contact you?”

 “At the usual time, yes. We made sure it wasn’t a clone or a shapeshifter, too,” Izumi confirms. “She apologized again. I said I accepted, but I was still not going to move back in with her or anything.” 

Melissa snorts. “The nerve of that woman….” 

 “Melissa,” All Might says warningly. The blonde woman rolls her eyes but nods. Izumi just shakes her head as Tomoe makes a grabbing motion at her grandfather.

 “Gampa!” Izumi hands the girl over with a smile as All Might laughs. 

 “It’s almost her nap time anyway, right?” All Might asks.

 “It is. The doctor said earlier she probably is going to develop her Quirk soon,” Izumi says. “So she’s really tired due to that.”

 “Well then,” All Might hugs the toddler gently. “Nap time. Are you still going out on your date tonight?”

 “If it’s okay?” Izumi asks cautiously. “Hitoshi and I are just going to the movies.” 

 “Of course!” All Might beams. “Go be a normal teenager Izumi. Shinsou is a good boy.” 

 “And we already threatened him,” Melissa says.

 “… oh god,” Izumi stares at the two with her mouth open. “Do not threaten my boyfriend!”

 “We did. And we will!” All Might replies.

 “You threatened Mei when we started dating!” Melissa says.

 “That’s cause Hatsume would probably like blow you up in her quest for creation,” Izumi scoffs, but the smile on her face gives away her genuine emotions.

 “I was four when I learned no one was born truly equal,” Izumi’s voice echoes over the screen as it shows a much younger version of her in a doctor's office, looking terrified. 

 “Sorry, kid, it ain’t gonna happen. You’re Quirkless,” the doctor says. The screen shifts to show Izumi fighting with a blonde boy with an explosion Quirk he uses on her, laughing.

 “I’m not dramatic and wouldn’t call my childhood a living hell. But it wasn’t good. Being Quirkless was a mark on my life that made me a target. From bullies mostly but…” the screen changes to show a teacher and Izumi together, talking before the screen focuses on the teacher's smile, making him look sinister.

 “I was twelve when it started. Thirteen when I had my daughter. That’s when my life changed. Not just because of the pregnancy, but because of a hero.”

 The screen changes again to show Izumi opening the door to find the muscular form of All Might and a short man. She looks shocked.

 “A lot of things changed that day. I found a family who supports me. I learned the truth of my father…” the screen switches to show a photo of a younger Izumi being held by a white-haired man who looks like he is breathing fire. It then shows the man in a suit fighting All Might. The area around them is completely destroyed. “I will become a hero. Not just to repay my new dad for what he’s done but to bring my father, the man who hurt my new family, to justice.

 This is my hero story.”

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Notes:

-In this Au, All Might did tell Melissa he was her dad when she was younger and she ended up coming around more often. But as well, AFO let something slip during the fight which had All Might tracking down the civilian Midoriya family. He kept an eye on them, not interfering. Seeing that they were still in contact with AFO, he realized that his enemy was still alive, so that’s fun.

 However, when Izumi got pregnant he found Yamanaka and put him away, while also discovering Inko’s not so great parenting. It led to Izumi becoming his successor and being adopted by him. Inko has come around but Izumi isn’t willing to go. 

She and Shinsou met through Recovery Girl and started dating after a while. They’re very cute together.

-We don’t get Shinsou here if only cause I view these as the… prologue, the first chapter of sorts to set the scene and the basis of an AU… sorry!

[mercurytrinemoon]

Me debunking astrology generalizations and misconceptions or smth idk...

Squares and oppositions aren't pure evil. 

I can't believe I have to say this because I thought ya'll have learnt the characteristics of every aspect but here we are. Nothing in astrology is black and white. And I saw some ridiculous statements (not necessary here on tumblr) that said things like "if your Venus squares someone's ascendant then you don't find that person attractive AT ALL". Or "Mars square Mercury people can't speak politely and have an annoying voice". Like????? First of all, that's ridiculous. Second of all, square in not "everything bad" just like trine is not "everything amazing". Squares bring tension, which leads to motivation, they’re stimulating; sometimes excitement or charisma; sometimes they can make you overdo things. I'm not saying they're oh-so-marvelous because the challenges are still there, but they're not as bad as people paint them to be. Squares happen between two signs that are in the same modality so they have a bunch of things in common. Besides, some of them (Sagi-Pisces and Gemini-Virgo) are ruled by the same planet so there's a special type of chemistry between those (especially when applied to synastry). Oppositions work in two ways, planets either meet in the middle - opposite signs usually complete each other and fuel each other up. And worse case scenario? Natally this means being pulled in two different directions; synastry-wise, you can completely miss each other like two passing cars - so there may be some misunderstandings but I don't think that's the end of the world... And, as per usual, may be mitigated by other positive aspects.

This is me debunking other people's attempts at debunking Sun sign compatibility. 

Sun IS very important but when people ask about compatibility and go with Suns... and then someone tries to be a smartass and debunk the "compatible-incompatible" and does the same thing without even realizing it. Like, "oh I actually see a lot of Aries and Pisces having amazing relationships because *insert someting that is a total stretch and refers to their Sun sign traits*"... But you seem to forget that they're neighbouring signs... which means they probably have personal planets in those neighbouring signs... which means they're compatible not because of some made-up stuff that you're trying to come up with but because their other planets are compatible with each other. But you're still feeding into the Sun sign compatibility talk. (So like, what I'm trying to also say, yes, the entire synastry chart comes into play; Also, side note, everyone can get along on some level if they’re mature enough).

Planet in a sign is NOT the same as planet in the house. 

There may be some overlaps in some of the sign-houses associations (like in the overall energy; like for example, it sort of makes sense that 3rd, 7th and 11th are referred to as “air houses” because they’re the most social) but in NO WAY there are similarities between planet house position and the "ruling" sign. That association started a few decades ago and some would say that NOT linking houses with signs is a purely traditional approach. But there’s plenty of professional modern astrologers with 20/30/40-year experience who still differentiate between sign/house position... because they know (and have learnt along the way) that there’s a huge difference.

I'll give you 3 quick examples: Gemini planets and 3rd house planets both may put emphasis on communication, mental stimulation and gathering data. But Geminis are often scattered in their approach, they may be easily distracted, may be indecisive, may be jack of all trades and talkative jokesters. They actually hate routines and dullness. "Spice it up" is probably a Gemini's philosophy. Now 3rd house planets may indicate you actually LIKE doing things on the regular - like running errands every other day in the mornings or going to that one specific coffee shop to pick up a snack. You may actually work in logistics or as a postman (especially if your chart ruler or MC ruler is in the 3rd). Planets in the 3rd talk about your siblings, neighbours or school experiences - like having Venus in the 3rd may point to positive experiences within those areas - something Gemini Venus has nothing in common.

Venus in the 9th can study at an art/beauty or fashion school (or even teach there if the MC is involved); can be very attached to spiritual and religious matters; can also find love in a foreign land. But imagine it being in Taurus - rather shy, needing those stable values to feel secure, being an exceptionally great student at that art school thanks to its domicile. Venus in Sagittarius on the other hand, likes adventure, things being shaken up from time to time, lightheartedness and exploration. But what if we flip the scenario and that Sag Venus is in the 2nd house. This can denote earing money through travelling and looking for ways to expand but in a financial matters.

Continuing with the Venus examples, having Venus in Aries is completely different than Venus in the 1st. What do people usually say about Venus in the 1st? That it makes the native charming, lovely, well-put together, with great manners, maybe beautiful, graceful, maybe a bit shallow. When in Aries? None of these characteristics fit, on top of that, it's in its detriment. Our poor gal Venus is uncomfortable and confused in Aries. She's like, "conquer? Swords? Selfishness? Obnoxiousness? Sparring? You're telling me to fight people? What am I doing here???" 

And I'll leave you here with that cause those examples weren’t that quick lol and in fact, I could give you a 100 of those. Besides, this actually inspired a 3-page rant that I've already posted not so long ago that you can read HERE.

There's no such thing as "more accurate" astrology. 

Both western and vedic are valid. Both can show you the same things. JUST KEEP THEM SEPARATE AND DON'T MIX THEM WITH EACH OTHER. And don't say things like "sidereal shows your soul" - omg I saw this statement soooo many times, who the hell even came up with this?! Actually, if anything, it's the modern western approach that "psychologized" (yea I just made up a word, you mad?) astrology while Jyotish still sticks to the very real "here and now", sometimes fatalistic predictions of how exactly your life is going to roll out... But hey, reach for hellenistic methods and they can tell you the same things, just with different tools. So no, they do not show different things, it's just their language is different.

If you say you don't identify with your chart then you're just reading it wrong.

This partially connects to the last one in some ways... Switching to a different astrology or different charts is not a solution. Learn how to read your natal. If you say it doesn’t describe you, I can guarantee you that you haven’t studied it properly. (Now this hasn't turned into a rant yet but I may actually do a whole-ass post on this because if I start elaborating on it now I'll end up with another 3-page essay).

Learn how and when to generalize. Also learn how to take generalizations. 

I understand that you have to pick up on every single thing separately in order to put everything together. It's like learning a new language: first you need to learn individual words and then you need to know the proper grammar to create a full sentence. This is 100% understandable and necessary, but it's important to take the entire thing into consideration. And this goes for all branches of astrology, but I guess it's especially annoying with synastry. This, again, comes down to the very black and white approach. You know, like when you see those long paragraphs where people elaborate on all the intricacies of Venus-Pluto aspects or whatever as if that one thing was determining the entire relationship between two people. (Side note, no shade but some of ya'll should start writing fiction or poetry cause the amount of fluffy speech and waffle that I see floating around here on tumblr is insane sometimes). Why are you wording everything as a make it or break it type of situation? And on the receiving end - learn how to take *properly phrased* generalizations constructively. Example: it IS a rule that Aries is a competitive one, maybe you're not one of them (for many reasons) but don't make a fuss about someone saying this. It IS a basic rule that energies of the same sign in two people are going to get along (well that depends on the planets involved but I digress), if that, for some other reasons, doesn't apply to you, don't go yelling that it's bullcrap because you hate people of the same sign. You know? Like, learn the difference.

DON'T SCARE PEOPLE WITH ASTROLOGY.

I had a mini-rant on this one a while ago, but I think this deserves a constant reminder (and refers to the last point), I don't want to see any more posts that would say things like "xxx house placements will bring you suffering" or "stay away from people with planets in your xxx house" or, even worse, making a (completely untrue btw) prediction based on one single thing like "someone with so-and-so aspect is going to harm you". And you're so casual about it??? You know there are sensitive people in the world. Learn some ethics. Learn some counseling skills. Don't be ignorant. Don't throw these random stuff at people just like that. And learn some actual astrology cause most of these aren't even closely describing that particual aspect. LIKE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.

Ok now I'm pissed again.

Studying astrology and believing in free will doesn’t go well together.

It's not just psychological and spiritual. It's useful to know that western astrology made it like that because there were still people threatening astrologers for using it as a divination tool. So they moved away from the predictive/deterministic aspect of it. Now, I'm not here to change anyone's beliefs cause that's a very personal thing that everyone should develop on their own. But once you start diving deeper into astrology you'd notice that there's a heavy emphasis on fatedness and things being predetermined. That includes both the good and the bad stuff and you should learn to accept that. And with the bad things specifically, let's not excuse it with some "oh that was an opportunity for growth". Like yea, maybe, occasionally??? But just acknowledge that sometimes things happen not because there was a deeper meaning in them... but because you have a Pluto-Mars conjunction in the 6th that makes an applying square to your chart ruler and you were going through a profection year where Mars was your time lord and it transited that chart ruler while making a conjunction with Neptune so you were attacked by a baby crocodile while swimming and it bit off your toe and you got a nasty infection and that’s it (I just made that up btw, I don't actually know anyone who was attacted by a crocodile). So like, sometimes shit just happens and there's nothing psychological about it. Also, I bet your free will didn't want to be attacked by that croc.

[shirophantomvox]

Hold My Hand- Illumi x Reader

OMG thank you! My first international fan! Thank you for this wonderful prompt! This was requested by @illucilfer .

Summary: Today’s story takes place in a 1950s diner by a frequently used Interstate; Interstate 95. We know this dinner for its delicious hamburgers, hot dogs, milkshakes, and jukebox records, but every night one Patreon never returns home. A few men who were angry about your recent arrest have shot you both. As you both stare at each other exchanging mental signals, everyone around you tries to help you to the hospital. Y/N is narrating the story. I seem to have fewer grammar errors that way. FYI, Bold and italicized font will reference a thought or flashback.

Story Navigation

Let’s get started!

The leaves have turned bright yellow and orange, fluttering every second to the ground. I could hear little children a while away laughing and playing in the community park; throwing up the leaves, jumping into piles, and throwing them at each other. The smell of freshly baked donuts brightened everyone’s mood. All you had to do was take one bite and your face would brighten and crack a smile. Dining at Cupid’s Kitchen will always have your heart and interest.

Interstate 95 was always heavy with traffic during this time of year. The folks of Dallas celebrated mulch annually. The “Mulch Fest” was a street fair that stretched 1.5 miles to the east that contained music, drinks, farmer panels, homemaker Q&A, and other activities that southerners enjoy. Illumi and I are only here because of an unfinished assignment. We have worked night and day for countless days trying to catch Jack “Da Hamor” Gilberton, but he was nowhere to be found. Eventually, I allowed my anger to get the best of me and made the executive decision to take a day off. I barred Illumi from searching, tracking, or any form of hunting for our target. The life of a bounty hunter and an assassin can thrill, but it can drive you insane if you allow it.

Ironically, Illumi and I both enjoy fall. It is perfect for cuddling (although he acts as if he’s too good to cuddle), wearing creative hoodies, going to pumpkin patches, and attending apple orchids. I tend to “lose my cool” when we have dates there. When I was a child, my family did not go on trips like these because they were over an hour away from our home and I had 5 siblings. But once I made money for myself, I made it my mission to go to one at least 5 times out of the year. Illumi enjoys the different fudge, hot cider, and candy apples. He almost broke a tooth on one!

“Say cheese snag-a’-tooth!”

“Stop it. It’s not funny!”

“It is! Could you imagine if you lost your two front teeth? You’d look almost adorable as you did in the 1st grade!”

“How did you know about that?”

“Duh! It happens to everyone, but your mother showed me the pictures, of course.”

“Curses!”

Illumi’s sweet tooth is just like Killua’s; both have a weakness for chocolate. Except, Killua will admit defeat while his older brother keeps denying it.

Cupid’s Dinner has been in Dallas for over 55 years. A black woman established it in 1945 by the name of Mary-Lou Benson. Since then, Mary’s family has been running the shop, making sure all of her customers are happy with the service. During the turn of each season, Cupid’s Dinner gives its customer's food options based on the season. The fall options include donuts, candy apples, different flavored cider, fudge, and hot coffee specials. As much as everything looked appetizing, I could not order it all. Our server, Little Ben, placed our drinks in front of us and handed us the menu. I could tell he was happy with his line of work, just as I was to be with Illumi.

“You all take your time. I’ll be back in five.”

Ilumi glanced on both sides of the room, scanning for Jack Gilberton, already forgetting the agreement we established.

“Illumi, what are you doing?”

“Huh?”

“You keep looking around like you’ve seen Da Hamor. Eat your donut and relax, sweetheart.”

“I cannot relax. I must stay on alert.”

“If I can relax, so can you. It’s not that hard.”

“Fine. If I die, it’s on your head… literally.”

The jingling bell rang almost every second when a customer walked in. It was a joy to everyone's ears; the spirit of Mary Lou-Benson was alive and well. An overwhelming feeling of love seemed to have overtaken the diner. After examining the bistro for quite some time now, each customer had been using their cellphones at the table instead of chatting with their families. Many traditional families hated that about this generation but they should be open to new traditions forming. Illumi dislikes using cell phones or tablets at the table unless we use them for missions. He has emphasized how rude it is to be surfing the web about utter nonsense while someone is speaking. This is a pet peeve of his, something I’ll never step on his toe about. Although I think that is overdoing it, I respect it.

Little Ben served our table quickly, leaving us with two dishes of a classic chicken sandwich, kettle chips, one chocolate, and vanilla milkshake. Milkshakes were my weakness; I nearly foam at the mouth when I see one. When I found out that Illumi had NEVER had a milkshake, I almost fainted.

“No. I’ve never had a milkshake.”

“Huh? You’re missing out, pal.”

“What’s the big deal? Isn’t it frozen milk?”

“Not just frozen milk. You can add many flavors, toppings, and whip cream!”

“Well, then. You’ll have to show me sometime.”

We thanked Little Ben for his service as he clocked out for the day.

“I have to admit these sandwiches look very appetizing.”

“You can say that again!”

Before I nibbled on my sandwich, I wanted to take a moment and adore the man before me; Illumi Zoldyck. A man full of mysteries, professionalism, skill, and talent. His enormous eyes were immersed in the large pieces of chicken in between the sourdough bread. He licked his index finger vigorously; allowing the homemade honey mustard to drip enough from the bread to the plate in between licks. Just the sight of him actually relaxing for once has blown me away. For once, Illumi Zoldyck could be himself and I had the privilege to witness it.

“Um… why are you staring at me? Do I have food on my face,” he asked; violently wiping his mouth off with a provided cloth napkin.

“Oh! Ha, ha; no reason. I wanted to see your reaction after drinking your milkshake. That’s all.”

“Why? It’s just a drink.”

“Whatever you say, babe.”

“Babe? What happened to LuLu or Illumi-Lu?”

I gasped and pretended to be surprised… although I was a little.

“I did not know that you liked those pet names. I assumed it mortified you.”

“Who told you that? That never rolled off my tongue. “What I said was” — He bent closer to the table and to me; glancing both to the right and left to ensure no wandering ears were around — “I prefer Illumi-Lu to be said in the bedroom and LuLu when we’re alone, like how we are right now.”

“Aww…. ok,” I yelled in excitement.

“Don’t blow it out of proportion, alright?”

“Yes, sir.”

As we ate, Illumi hummed along to the tune that played a few times on the restaurant's jukebox. Illumi and I were born in the mid-90s, but listening to 50s music was a part of his aesthetic. I was told that he had an “old soul” which sounds romantic at first until you realize how men were during that era. His raging temper was a noticeable toxic trait, but it has drastically improved. Nonchalantly sipping on his milkshake and then eating more of his chips, he grazed the soft part of his left hand over mine as he continued to hum.

“What’s the name of this song? You seem to know it rather well.”

“Put your head on my shoulder, a famous song from the 60s. I heard my parents sing it once and since then, they have addicted me to it. Do you like it?”

“Yes, in fact, I love it. All of this is—”

“A surprise to you? Well, enjoy it while it lasts because once I find Jack Gilberton, this side of me will hide for a while.”

“Understood.”

Damn! I was just feeling connected to him again!

The music swelled; everyone seemed to be happy. Not an evil spirit insight to disrupt this beautiful moment. For once in my life, my raven-haired beauty actually held my hand tight, stole a few of my barbecue kettle chips, and gazed into my eyes harmlessly. His lips brushed against both of my hands, ever so lightly placing kisses on both sides of them. Illumi’s gentle smile warmed my heart as my lingering thoughts of hope stayed intact.

The welcoming bell jingled again. Two men in black leather jackets, stone-washed blue jeans, and tattooed all over their arms came into the diner. The men seemed to be bikers who had just left their own “spot” but one thing struck me as they continued to walk towards the staff. They both wore sunglasses when the sunset for the day. Not to mention that the lights were not dim in the diner and the moon was as bright as ever. The second man had his eyes glued in my direction. My heart beat faster as I wondered if Jack Gilberton had found us. Could you imagine?

Put your head on my shoulder

Hold me in your arms, baby

Squeeze me oh-so-tight

Show me you love me too

I am used to coming in contact with enemies on my hit list, but given Jack’s criminal history; I felt like I may not survive his attacks. Illumi will survive, but just barely. Both men approached the checkout, crowing over Little Ben’s sister. She was a short woman but full of might, and I could tell by the shakiness in her voice she was frightened. I wanted to step in so badly, but I didn't want to blow my cover just in case it was, in fact, Jack Gilberton. After I assume, ordering food, both men stood by the entrance, blocking it from others from entering and leaving. The sound of their old, beat up-lighters crackled as one lit a joint and the other lit a cigarette. This horrid smell ruined the atmosphere because they were not in a designated area and it drowned out the lovely aroma of the food being served.

“If you gentlemen would like to smoke, you need to go outside. There is no smoking in here.”

“What? You think you’re better than me because you don’t smoke?”

“Huh? I never said that, sir. I asked for you to go outside. Not all of our customers can deal with it.”

They did not move a muscle. The sound of their mucous laughter made everyone’s stomach turn. They laughed at the young girl and called her many slurs. Little Ben’s sister didn’t flinch, nor did she cry; she remained still, staring at the men. I had just enough of their obnoxious behavior.

“If you do not leave, I will call the police.”

“The hell you won’t.”

Put your lips next to mine, dear

Won't you kiss me once, baby?

He drew a gun from his left side. He aimed it at Little Ben’s sister and demanded that she emptied the drawer. She refused. Her stone, iron will reminded me of Illumi; no matter the circumstance, they remained intact, determined to fight until the end. Bravery is always encouraged, but too much will cause your life to be taken away. Little Ben’s sister grabbed a fake till that they kept under the real one and threw it at both men. Fake money fluttered everywhere in the small diner, mimicking confetti. Gunshots rang in all directions as the imbeciles recklessly shot, aiming for Little Ben’s sister. Everyone threw themselves on the ground to avoid being shot, but luck cannot spread itself throughout an entire room of people. A young child, an older man, and another worker were shot in their lower leg. Blood reflected from the ground as it continued to seep. Ignoring injured civilians is a jackass move and continuing to deny the fact would prove that the oath I pledge to meant nothing. Sure, bounty hunters must remain hidden, but if someone is injured, I must help them.

The child was lying lifeless on the polished marble floor. He would not respond to my shaking or my silent whispers. When I rolled him over, my heart broke into a million pieces. This child had no chance of survival; a few bullets struck his chest, one just inches away from his heart. A tear rolled down my cheek.

“Why must the good die young,” I whispered to myself.

“... Because snitches get stitches.”

Before I could gain sight of who stated this utterly corny response, I felt an overwhelming amount of pain in my lower back. It felt like a million tiny needles were jabbed so far through my skin that they entered my intestine. I could still hear, but my body would not move. I tried and tried, but my brain would not signal my legs.

Move! Move, damn it!

It’s odd; I could hear myself talk, but my body would not move at all. The sound of another thudding body made my mind jump. My heart had already been pounding enough to try to resuscitate my organs to move, but a familiar semi-blurring sight of none other than Mr. Illumi Zoldyck cleared my sight. My brain went wild. I didn’t know if Illumi died or if he became paralyzed, but one thing is for sure. We finally made eye contact that felt special; something I hadn’t felt since the day I met him. Our contact felt like magnets; an unbreakable bond. Suddenly, my icy hand felt warmth around my palm and fingers. Illumi simultaneously fell in a way that connected our hands. Our unbreakable bond, the warmth of his fingers laying on top of mine, and the gaze we shared somehow made me feel like it was just the two of us alone. I could hear his thoughts loud and clear; thoughts that came from the heart.

“Please help me. Before it’s too late, LuLu,” I cried, thinking I was going insane. “I don’t want to leave if it means leaving you behind.”

“I’m not going anywhere. Not without you.”

“Please! I want to live a life. Life as a bounty hunter, build a support system to our children, and a good lover is all I want to be.”

“You are a warrior and so am I. We have been through worse. This is nothing.”

Mere eye contact is all we need to exchange wandering conversations. The bond that we’ve created is something so strong that I haven’t realized it until now. The warmth emitted from his loose grasp seems to lose its effectiveness. It blurred my vision beyond recognition, leaving Illumi as a near figment of my imagination.

“Oh no. I guess this is it.”

My vision darkened. Illumi was slipping away as my lingering thoughts almost made my heart give out from exhaustion. I was ready to accept my fate, but it seemed like fate had other plans. My vision was still darkening by the second, but my sense of touch remained there. Smooth fingers outline my arms, torso, and chest. I heard muffled voices yelling and screaming about calling for assistance, but I didn’t care if they came or not. I made peace with my life’s end. Bit by bit, my breathing slowed down, but my sense of touch remained heightened. I felt a rubber glove touch my face and neck, examining it for any damage.

The jukebox continued to play Illumi’s favorite song, Put Your Head on my Shoulder. I remembered the day I laid my head on his shoulder; boy, what an endearing moment that was. It was something I took for granted, something I should have savored, for I never knew that this moment would have happened. The song grew muffled by the second verse. That verse repeated every time I tried to force myself to take what felt like my last gaze at my raven-haired beauty.

Just a kiss goodnight, maybe

You and I will fall in love (you and I will fall in love)

-FIN.

A/N: Since you’ve made it to the end, I’ll say something. The reader did not die in the end. They were later revived at the hospital.

[honeypiehotchner]

Statistically Speaking (a Spencer Reid one shot)

Okay, yes, I know I literally just made a post about being triggered by Criminal Minds, but writing fluff about Spencer has been one of the things that has helped me heal (weirdly enough) and this is one of the one shots that I wrote. It’s all fluff. Enjoy xx.

(Also I’m only on like season 2 of the show so that’s when I’m imagining this is set but it can be whenever idc)

Tagging @breadgenie892​ because she ruined me with her Jaskier x Geralt fluff earlier. This is 100% payback :)

You and Spender Reid — sorry, Dr. Spencer Reid as he adorably introduced himself to you on your first day at the BAU (and scrambled to say, “S-Sorry, it’s Spencer. Just Spencer Reid,” immediately after).

The two of you have quite the bond.

You’re no genius, not in the way Spencer is. Your memory is nowhere near Eidetic, it more resembles Dory from Finding Nemo, but you don’t make that joke anymore. Hotch gave you quite a worried look and called you into his office an hour later to ask if you were alright that day.

But you digress.

Before you met Spencer, Google was your best friend. You ask a lot of questions, and by a lot-- well, just ask Morgan.

On your first day, Morgan said, and you quote, “Oh, God. There’s two of them.”

Whenever you had a question, you Googled it. You researched, you found literary journals and universities that studied what you wanted to know. You found your answers, and sometimes more questions along the way.

But when you started at the BAU, Google was child’s play. Especially when Spencer could give you the answer faster than you could type in the question and hit enter on Google.

It’s one of the things you love most about him. At first, he only answered you because you have a bad habit of asking questions aloud when meaning to just speak to yourself. Spencer didn’t know you were mainly asking yourself, and he launched into a full explanation. You were too mesmerized to stop him, and started asking further questions. It went on and on until you were dazed and he was smiling, and the rest of the team was staring at the two of you like you’d gone insane.

So now, you ask him anything and everything.

Like…

Recently, you called him at almost ten at night. It was storming, but you really needed to take a shower. It had been two days since your last, and you couldn’t take it anymore.

“Hey Spence,” you said when he picks up. “Statistically speaking, how likely am I to get struck by lightning?”

“What? Y/N, what are you doing?”

“I need to shower and it’s storming. How do I look statistically?”

“Not good! Don’t take a shower!”

“Spencer,” you groaned, flopping down on your bed.

“Y/N, showering increases your likelihood of being electrocuted. Ten to twenty people on average are struck by lighting when bathing.”

“There’s the stats,” you chuckled. “Fine, genius. I’ll wait it out.”

“Good,” he sounded genuinely relieved.

His concern made you smile. “What are you up to?”

“Talking you out of electrocuting yourself.”

“I wouldn’t be electrocuting myself. The lightning is what would do it.”

“Yes, I know.”

“Are you tired of me yet?”

Spencer laughed airily before he replied in a soft voice, “No. Never.”

As strange as it sounds, things changed that night. Spencer stayed on the phone with you until the storm passed -- you were getting scared after a particularly loud boom of thunder, but you’d never admit that to him. Once it passed and once Spencer checked the weather radar to be sure it was gone, he let you shower.

The next morning at the BAU, you fixed a cup of coffee for him as a thank you for the night before. You were expecting him to take it and move on, but he pulled you into a hug instead.

Thankfully, no one saw it. If they had, you’d both be getting hell for it.

But despite not seeing the hug, the team has noticed things.

Hotch first noticed it when you offered to accompany Reid to the local police station to set things up on a new case. You normally go with Emily to talk to the families or even with Morgan to visit crime scenes. It was nothing against Spencer, you just happened to like being out in the field more than holed up in a station with exhausted law enforcement.

But not this time. This time you wanted to be with Reid. You even turned down Morgan’s offer to go to the crime scene.

Yeah. Hotch knew something was up.

Morgan noticed, too. He saw you pouring a massive amount of sugar into a cup of coffee and jokingly asked if it was for Reid. In your flustered state, you said it was yours. But Morgan watched you hand the cup off to Reid once you were back with him.

Emily’s suspicions were confirmed when you were talking with her one night on the plane. Everyone else was asleep, so you, Emily, and JJ began talking about “girly” things. Tonight’s topic happened to be crushes.

“I can’t imagine falling for someone on the team,” Emily whispered, pulling a face, overdoing it just to get your reaction.

And your reaction was priceless. You shrugged and went completely silent. While you were glancing over your shoulder to check that Reid was still sleeping, Emily shared quite the look with JJ.

Garcia was maybe the last to notice things. She had her suspicions as well (it passes the time, and Morgan made a few comments about it, too), but when she saw the two of you laughing, that was it. Spencer was sitting in his desk chair and you were sitting on his desk. You were arguing about something Garcia couldn’t hear, but the smiles on your faces told her the argument was all flirting.

And she’d be right to think that, too. The argument that day was that Spencer overworks himself, so you promptly sat on top of his paperwork so that he couldn’t get to it. He refused to touch it because it was too close to your ass and voiced this issue, and you told him it sounded like a personal problem. And that you wanted him to get up and walk around, maybe eat something, too.

You’re a bit of a hopeless romantic. That part of you was telling you that Spencer’s flirting was genuine. That there were feelings buried behind it, but you were never sure.

Spencer was officially the last to notice.

“How am I looking?” You asked seemingly out of nowhere.

Spencer raised his eyebrows, turning to look at you, your voice having broken him out of his thoughts. “Uh, good?”

You tilt your head. “No, statistically. I asked what are the chances of me making it to dinner on time?”

“Dinner?” Morgan asked, sauntering over with his blinding smile. “Got a hot date tonight?”

“You wish,” you scoffed, shoving his shoulder lightly.

But you didn’t elaborate further, which caused Spencer to go quiet. Realizing you weren’t getting any statistics out of him this time, you gathered your things in your arms and headed out.

Once you made it through the door, Morgan nearly fell to the floor. “Spencer. Pretty boy. What are you doing, man?”

Spencer dumbly looked down at the paperwork on his desk.

Before he could say anything, Morgan said, “No, man, not the paperwork. Y/N. What are you doing?”

“What do you mean what am I doing?”

Morgan laughed loudly. “Oh, pretty boy. You have no idea?”

Spencer scooted back from his desk, eyebrows furrowed in genuine confusion. “No idea about what?”

“Reid,” Morgan emphasizes every word. “She likes you.”

The sentence stunned Spencer so much he nearly fell out of his chair. “What?”

“Come on, man,” Morgan groaned. “An IQ of 187 and it didn’t help you see she’s got feelings for you?”

Spencer stood to his feet, grabbing his jacket. You liked him. You like him, and you’re going to dinner with someone else.

“There you go,” Morgan cheered as Spencer practically bolted from the room. “Go get her, tiger!”

“Shut up!” Spencer called after Morgan.

Pushing through the doors, Spencer halted, seeing you standing by the elevator. You’re staring down at your phone, and you don’t exactly look happy.

Spencer approaches you slowly, hand gripping the strap of his bag. “You okay?”

You look up quickly like he’s startled you, and truthfully, he has. “Oh. Um, no. My date-- Well, they canceled. Said something came up.”

Spencer can see you’re hurt by this, but he doesn’t care. “Have dinner with me,” he says, eyes expectant.

“With you?” You ask.

“Yeah,” he shrugs, a smile coming through when he adds, “please.”

“Okay,” you can’t help but smile, too.

Spencer grins now, stepping over to press the down arrow on the elevator. You wait in silence, stepping on when the doors open, and Spencer presses the button for the ground floor.

All of your hurt is gone from your face now, and it causes Spencer to start thinking. He stares ahead, and then he hears you giggle.

When he looks over at you, he asks. “You didn’t have a dinner date, did you?”

“Nope,” you chuckle. “Got ya.”

“Yeah,” Spencer laughs. “You got me.”

“So…” You pause, heart racing. “Statistically speaking, how likely are you to kiss me right now?”

Spencer doesn’t even care that the elevator is a few seconds from reaching the ground floor. All he cares about right now is you.

And because of that, he says, “Very likely,” before pulling you in. Your fingers tangle in his hair while his cup your jaw, moving you closer, deepening the kiss, trying to make up for all of his stupidity. As he holds you now, feels your lips, he wonders how he never knew.

[lucyjay]

Silver (b.bh)

||You and Baekhyun have been friends for the past couple years. What happens when you both develop feelings for each other but no one has the courage to admit it?

Genre: smut (a bit of fluff)

Warnings: explicit language, alcohol consumption, teasing, unprotected sex ( balloon your baboons fellahs), dirty talk, oral sex, fingering, cum play, throat fucking, hair pulling, multiple orgasms

Words: 6.5k  

 You throw a final look at your reflection in the mirror and sigh. I look like shit, you think to yourself and make your way to the bathroom to finish straightening your hair. The last thing you are in the mood for is clubbing but guess who won’t take no for an answer?your friend Nat who borderline blackmailed you into either joining her and your friends tonight or finding all your embarrassing high school photos displayed on your insta tomorrow morning. 

 After managing to make your hair not look like you got out of a cat fight, you put on some make up which for you consists of 3 simple steps. Step 1, hiding the black shopping bags that jewel your under eyes, Step 2, some blush so that you don���t resemble a ghost and Step 3, mascara. The final result looks better than you anticipated when you started getting ready over an hour ago. 

A simple black baggie-t’shirt style dress, a pair of black boots, your straight hair naturally hugging your shoulders, falling all the way down to your waist and last your make up which thank god hides the fact that you’ve worked a total of 60 hours this week. It’s a nice, fresh spring night and you reckon you’d be okay without a jacket on. You throw your keys, phone and credit card in a small bag and make your way out of your apartment. Your find your uber already waiting for you outside the main entrance of the building, you jump in and decide to give your friend a call to check if they are already at the club. 

 “Hola”, her high pitched voice makes you chuckle, she still sounds like a 5 year old girl just like when you first met her. 

 “Hola. Sooo, I’m on my way, I should be there in like 20′ max. Who else is coming? Please tell me Sehun and Taeyong will be there? Taeyong promised he would make time if i joined you”, you protest already used to one of your best friends, Taeyong canceling on you lastminute.com because of work. 

 “They are already with me babe and we should reach the club in 10′ or so. Sara and Jaebum are coming as well, Bam is DJ’ing, oh and ahm”, she pauses and your heart starts racing subconsciously knowing what she is about to say. “..Baekhyun is coming”. You swear at her for not letting you know earlier and she mumbles apologies which leave you completely untouched. 

 “Nat, you did it on purpose”, you try to keep your tone calm only because your uber driver is already giving you some “lady keep your voice down” looks through the rear mirror. 

 “I didn’t but even if I did so what? We are all friends and it’s completely childish of both of you to put us in a position where we have to go out with each of you separately. Bam is worried and Sehun is having abandonment issues”, she whines dramatically and you hear Sehun in the background screaming, “I just want my friends back, oh god, please”, a fake cry following his oscar-worthy performance as you hear Taeyong burst into laughter a bit further in the background. 

 “Ok ok! I don’t care. I’m done playing his little games anyway. I wanna drink and have fun. See you in a bit”, you reply and hang up. The uber has reached the city centre and your gaze in boring outside the window looking at the people and the buildings but not really paying attention to anything. All you can think about is him. How things have completely gone to shit when they were so promising. You and Baekhyun met a a couple years ago when he started hanging out with Sehun who he met at work. The latest then brought him into your group and he clicked with all of you straight away. 

Fast forward to a a few months ago, you were at one of BamBam’s house parties chilling and chatting away when he confessed that he likes you and he has been into you since the day he met you catching you completely off guard. You, having been crushing on the boy since the moment you laid your eyes on him, did what no 26 year old, sane woman would do and just bailed. Literally left him there, drink in hand, mouth hanging open in shock and you just left the house, got inside a taxi and went home. You were so embarrassed over your reaction and disappointed in yourself for ruining the perfect chance to be with the biggest crush you’ve had since middle school, that you couldn’t even bring yourself to message an apology to him. A few days later you all met at a cafe and that’s when it started. He was so cold and sulky towards you and who could blame him? But he was overdoing it to the point that it started pissing you off. You couldn’t get him to talk to you alone and eventually managed to get you to not stand being with him in the same room. Every time you met since then, it was just a verbal war between the two of you, full of sneaky insults and hurtful jokes with a drizzle of swear words and some whipped sarcasm on top.

 “It’s just one night out. How bad can it get?”, you whisper only for your own ears to hear you. The uber slows down outside the club, you thank your driver and step out of the vehicle, gently closing the door behind you. The queue for the club isn’t too long and you can spot Nat,Tae and Sehun waiting on the left side where the VIP queue is forming. Sehun waves at you eagerly and you make your way to their direction. 

 “At least she is wearing a dress and not pyjamas”, Sehun teases and lifts you up in a hug that made you almost gasp for air. 

 “I am overworked, not lame. I now how to dress for a night out”, you spit back faking annoyance and the younger boy raises his hands in defence. 

 “Tough week at work?”, Taeyong asks as all four of you walk towards the entrance of the club. 

 “Everybody decided to get married at the end of summer apparently, so considering that I have to organise 9 weddings within the next 4 months, I would say tough year.”, you pause and your eyes follow the direction Taeyong is looking at and...there he is. Locking his car dressed like a bloody model straight out of a Vogue photoshoot. Black jeans, loose blue shirt, a silk navy blue scarf around his neck and a pair of black boots. “...and it’s not about to get better”, you finish your sentence. 

 Him being ridiculously attractive should have been something you were used to by now, but you haven’t seen him in almost a month and in all honesty you almost forgot how easily he makes your entire body go numb just by standing there not even looking at you. Too lost in your own thoughts you haven’t noticed him standing next to you greeting the others, ‘till he turns his attention to you. His hair is silver. Fuck him and his ability to look good in everything. Fuck him and his gorgeous face, you think to yourself. 

 “Your hair is longer”, he says in the most indifferent tone. Is this his idea of a greeting? Asshole, you think.

 “Your hair is bloody silver”, you reply, your eyes not leaving his. He serves you a slight side smile and you can feel the insides of your palms getting sweaty.

 “Looks good doesn’t it?”, he throws a rhetorical question not really waiting for an answer. You tsk and roll your eyes at him while quickly turning to get inside the club. BamBam was near the entrance to greet you and show you which table he reserved for you and your friends. You follow him and he leaves you shortly after to go and prepare his station for his set next to the man currently DJ’ing. 

 “I’m gonna go get drinks, what do you want?”, Baekhyun asks the rest of you.

 “Let’s just get a bottle”, Nat proposes and you nod. “tequila or Vodka?”, she asks. 

 “Tequila”, you and Baekhyun shout in unison and you turn to look at each other. Are the lights in here making him look even more attractive or is it just you being horny for him? You give yourself a mental slap. 

 “Tequila is good”, Sehun adds. Baekhyun makes his way to the bar and Nat moves to your side, leaning next to your ear so that she doesn’t need to scream on top of the music. 

 “Make a move”, she says and you almost choke on your own spit. 

 “Are you insane? Haven’t you been around lately? I guess not. Let me fill you in. In the last episode of Season 2, he hates me. End of story”, you reply and she chuckles. 

 “He doesn’t hate you. He is just still hurt by your reaction back then. And you are clearly into him. Like, it’s clear like the sun. Like, I can see you undressing him with your eyes. I could legit-...” 

 “That’s enough! I got your point”, you cut her off and really wish Baek could get his ass there already cause you swear you would love to down that entire bottle of tequila right now. 

 “Babe, talk to him. It’s a shame. You have had feelings for each other for so long. You can’t just..leave it.”, she says and her tone is soothing and understanding. You turn to look at her and nod causing her to smile widely and clap her hands like a little kid who just got her birthday gift. A minute later Baek shows up with two bottles of tequila inside a bucket and a waitress follows right behind him with a tray full of glasses and ice which she lays on your table. 

A few drinks down and you find yourself relaxed enough to be dancing with Taeyong like there’s no tomorrow, rocking some crazy moves  perfectly nsync with BamBam’s wild beats.  Taeyong’s hands are on your waist and you rest your head on his shoulder, your back against his chest as you sing every single lyric of the song currently blasting.

 “I need another drink”, he screams over the music. You nod and make your way to the table where you find Nat and Sehun talking to Jaebum and Sara, a couple Nat met whilst on holidays in Japan, who happened to be from the same city as the rest of you. You chat with them for a few minutes, sipping on your drink when you realise you haven’t seen Baekhyun since returning to the table. After scanning the area around you, your gaze falls on Nat’s who mouths a silent “outside” to you, as if she has read your thoughts. You excuse yourself and make your way through the intoxicated crowd, eventually reaching the exit of the club. You step on the pavement and look up and down both directions to see if you can spot Baek. On the left side of the doors, a few meters away you can distinguish a frame that looks like him. You slowly make your way towards the man and after a few steps you can see his face clearer under the dull lighting the lamppost covers the corner of the street with. He was staring at the ground, cigarette in between his index and middle finger. You clear your throat and he turns to look at you. 

 “Oh sorry, I didn’t see you”, he says calmly, taking a puff of his cigarette, quickly letting a line of smoke out of his nostrils.

“You smoke”, you say and it’s more like a realisation and less like a question. Your stare drifts off of his face and down to his feet as if his shoes are the most interesting thing to you. 

 “Yes, got a problem with that?’, he turns to look at you and you raise your head to meet his eyes. You can’t read him. You never could. He looks unbothered yet sounds annoyed. It’s so frustrating and you swear at yourself for even thinking of approaching him. You scoff and turn to leave, sure that you’re clearly not wanted there. 

 “That’s the second time”, he says and his voice is low but you can sense a weak scent of irony lingering at the end of his word. You stop in your trucks and turn to face him. 

 “What was that?”, you ask. 

 “It’s the second time you walk away from me. There won’t be a third”, his statement catches you off guard but you’re not planning on letting him see the affect his words have on you. 

 “I suppose you came out here to get some air, I wanted to check if you’re alright but you’re clearly not up for a chat. Am I wrong for thinking that the best thing to do was to excuse myself?”, you regret the slight sarcasm in your words which was completely unintended. His attention lands on your face. There’s at least 2 meters distance between yourself and him but for some reason you feel like you’re suffocating. His presence is so strong that you can’t even think straight. Without taking his eyes off of yours, he throws his cigarette somewhere to the side and with two steps he is standing right in front of you. You can smell the smoke on him but it doesn’t bother you; his cologne in combination with his addictive natural scent are enough to make your head hazy. He shouldn’t be able to affect you like this. 

 “Excuses”, his voice comes out like a loud whisper and you feel embarrassed at how it makes your entire lower body go numb and the sensitive area between your legs pulsate. His stare is so heavy that it almost makes you feel small. He moves a bit closer to you and you can almost feel his body touching yours.

 “Baekhyun, I’m...”, your voice fades out unable to complete the sentence. Your eyes still on his like magnets. You can’t see anything around you but him.

“Finish your sentence Y/N”, he says calmly. You gather all the courage you could before you allow the confessions that you have been battling all these months, come out. It’s so hard but you know you have to. You have to give it a shot.

 “I’m sorry. For that day.”, you say and his features rest in a slight shock which only encourages you to continue. 

“I’m sorry i left you like that and that I didn’t explain myself. I’m sorry that I never called you after what happened. But what I’m not sorry about is what happened afterwards. You were so mean to me and you refused to talk to me. Your behaviour was horrible and I don’t take back anything I’ve said to you every time we fought”. You swear your knees are about to give out and your breathing is so heavy that you can feel your chest rising and falling as if you were running. You heart beating in your head is making you dizzy and you pray that you won’t just faint right there and then. 

 “You don’t regret anything you’ve said to me all the times we fought?”, he asks and you feel a pinch of annoyance that this was the only part of your paragraph long monologue he chose to focus on. 

 “Nothing. You started every single fight”, your statement came out strong and your voice way too stable given your current state. You congratulate yourself in your head. As if that was even possible, Baekhyun steps even closer to you, now trapping you between his body and the wall. You can feel his torso pushing yours backwards only for the back of your waist to land on his right hand, his left one resting on the wall slightly brushing your cheek. 

 “I swear I would take you against this fucking wall just to shut this annoying mouth of yours”, his lips almost touching yours. You can feel his breath on your face and his words wake the butterflies in your stomach. You’re mad at yourself for feeling so weak under his stare. It takes you a few seconds to realise that you have been holding in a breath. You just stand there, frozen, eyes glued on his honey brown ones when the words roll out of your tongue without second thought. 

 “Why don’t you then?”, you speak in a low voice that even gives you goosebumps. Your boldness surprises him and he shakes his head.

 “I shouldn’t. I-..” 

 “Excuses”, you cut him off and you catch him so off guard that if it wasn’t for you being an absolute mess right now, his shocked stare would have had you chuckling. He raises his hand to caress your cheek and the way his knuckles softly touch your skin makes your entire body shiver. He doesn’t allow you to let the sudden skinship action sink in when he tilts his head only to rest his forehead against yours. 

 “I don’t know what to do with you anymore. Please tell me Y/N. Just tell me what you want”, he pleads and the entirety of your body heat is now resting on your face. You have never seen Baekhyun like this, basically asking you to take the upper hand. You rest your arms on his and connect your hands behind his neck. 

 “I want you Baekhyun. I don’t even remember how it was not to want you.”, you inhale and the air entering your nostrils feels too hot “...let’s go back to yours.Or mine, I don’t care”. The moment you finished your sentence Baekhyun’s hand was on yours, already guiding you towards the direction of his car. He open the door for you to get in and a second later he jumps in the driver’s seat. 

 Baekhyun’s eyes are glued on the road and his grip on the wheal is strong. You take a minute to examine his side profile and your eyes linger on each of his beautiful features. His beautiful honey-brown eyes, his straight nose and his soft, pink lips that are currently pressed into a thin line as if he is trying hold back a river of words threatening to fall out. Your hands are resting on your thighs which you’re pressing together in a desperate attempt to ease the buzzing in your lower area. You are already so embarrassingly wet, even though Baek hasn’t even touched you, which makes you realise how wrong all your past partners must have been treating you. Not able to stand the distance between the two of you, you place your hand on top of his right thigh, slowly dancing your fingers up and down the area. He shakes his head, momentarily closing his eyes only to open them a second later. His stare is intense but you can’t read it properly. 

 “Babe...”, he says and your hand movement stops at the sound of the nickname. Feeling more aroused by the second, you bend slightly over so that your lips are brushing against his ear. 

 “What...babe?”, you tease and he grips the wheel with such strength that it looks like he is trying to break it in half. 

“Finish your sentence Baek”, you continue and at this point you know you’re playing with fire. He turns to give you a look for a split second, his eyes filled with something unknown to you and a slight smirk is gracing his beautiful lips.

 “Sit back properly, take off your underwear and open your legs.”, you’re looking at him, eyes wide open in shock. His habit of bossing you around would normally have you ignoring his ass, maximum serving him an eyeroll as a response, but now it’s different. Your brain hasn’t even had the time to comprehend the possible consequences of his request, when you find your hands slowly sliding the sides of your underwear down your legs. Before you manage to even speak a word, his slender fingers are caressing the inside of your thighs and you throw your head back, eyes shut in an attempt to keep yourself under control. His middle finger and index travel all the way to your sensitive area and you let out a low gasp when you feel them on your heat. 

 “Holy fuck...”, he says and inserts one finger inside your throbbing pussy. You moan out his name as his digit is hitting you exactly on the right spot and you can’t see it but there’s a victory smile resting on his lips. 

 “Baek wait...”, you try to complain but it’s in vain. He adds a second finger and while keeping his eyes on the road, one hand on the wheel, driving almost at 150 km/h, he is steadily bringing you closer and closer to your orgasm. You turn your head to the side, your eyes linger on his frame when you start feeling a knot forming on the lower part of your abdomen. You gather all the strength left in your body to lift your arm and tangle your fingers with his silver locks, slightly pulling his head backwards. He hisses and fastens the tempo of his fingers, his palm now coming in contact with your clit. You know you aren’t going to last long. Your walls start pulsating around his skilful digits and the car stops at a red light which finally allows him to focus his attention on you for at least a few seconds. 

 “I can’t wait to feel you clenching around my dick baby”, he says and you can feel yourself getting closer to your orgasm. 

“Does my baby like dirty talk?”, he teases you and you pull his hair a tad stronger than before. 

“I want you to come before the light turns green, you have approximately..”, he pauses to calculate the other traffic lights at the crossing, “...10-15 seconds?”, he adds driving his fingers in and out your pussy at a frenzy rhythm. You can’t handle the tension anymore. 

 “Baek, I can’t-...”, you swear you could cry with all this tension gathered on your lower body. You’re so close you can sense your orgasm. 

 “9..”, he says, his eyes piercing yours. 

 “Fuck, no I can’t”,  you close your eyes, trying to control your body. It’ll be too much, you don’t want to come here in his car. 

 “Open your eyes and look at me. 6″, he counts and you do as you’re told. His palm hitting your sensitive clit is sending vibrations all the way to your head and you swear you wouldn’t be able to spell out your own name at this moment if you had to. 

 “I’m so close, I’m- Baek please...’, you whine and you can feel your walls clenching like crazy, swallowing his fingers. He places his other hand around your neck, squeezing gently and you’re a goner. Your orgasm crushes through you like fireworks and you can’t stop yourself from grinding down against his fingers, greedily trying to ride the explosive feeling out. 

 “That’s my girl”, he flashes you a satisfied smile and removes his fingers from your pussy at once. You grimace at the loss of contact but you’re too occupied trying to gather your thoughts and get yourself together, to pay further attention. The car is already on the move and before you can fathom what’s happening, he is parking in front of a building. Your eyes feel heavy but only at the thought of what’s coming, you feel the knot in your stomach tighten again. Baek steps out of the car and opens the door for you. You take a second to put your underwear back on, and you step outside the vehicle likewise. He locks it and starts walking towards the entrance of the block of flats before you, his hand in yours as your steps shadow his. You walk up the stairs and stop at the first floor. He stands outside a door and takes out his keys to unlock it when he turns to face you for the first time since he had you coming all over his fingers in his car. 

 “Before we get in I need to tell you something”, he warns and his eyes are examining your face. You step closer to him, your arm brushing against his. 

 “What is it Baek?”, your voice sounds so sweet and the way you say his name has him melting. 

 “If we do this, there’s no disappearing in the morning. There’s no going back to how things were. If you don’t want to stay and if you don’t want to be with me, leave now. This can’t be a one-time thing for me. That’s not what I want.”, he takes a deep breath as if he just gave the most important speech of his life. Your mouth hangs open at his sudden confession and you feel a stink of guilt that you’ve made him so uneasy; scared that you would run away from him and disappear. You grab his keys and unlock the door which opens wide in front of you. You step inside his flat and turn your head to face him. 

 “Do you prefer eggs or pancakes for breakfast?”, you ask him while taking off your shoes. He steps in and shuts the door behind him. Walking backwards you start unbuttoning your dress, “...I prefer something sweet in the morning to be honest”, you’re teasing and you reach the last button. You take another step backwards and you can feel his eyes burning on you. He is following each step you take, mirroring your movements now taking off his shirt. You let the dark fabric of your dress fall down your body and pool around your ankles. Baekhyun stops in his tracks, half naked and the lust in his eyes could make you come right there and then. You are about to take another step backwards when he nods you negatively. 

 “Don’t move”, the words come out as a soft command and you listen, standing there only in your lace black underwear, looking at him basically begging him to do something. He hasn’t even kissed you. He is the only man that has given you an orgasm without touching you anywhere else, not even a peck on the lips. He takes his time roaming his gaze along your body, his eyes resting on your breasts a second longer. 

 “I want you to kiss me”, you let out before you realise the words leaving your mouth. He focuses his attention back on your face and your body is about to burst from the need to feel him closer in any way. He is slowly walking towards you while taking off his trousers, leaving his body now covered only by his black boxers. 

 “Your entire face is blushing, you’ve been squeezing your thighs together, your breathing is unsteady and you’re giving me blowjob eyes”, hie finishes his sentence when standing a breath away from you. “...you want me to do more than just kiss you baby”, you release a breath you didn’t know you were holding in  and he smiles. He is so infuriating standing there, laughing at the misery he has put you in. You can’t let him play you like this. 

 “If you think you can..-” 

 “Shut up”, he says and you can’t tell who initiated it  but his lips are on yours, kissing and biting as if your mouth is the last source of air and he needs it to survive. His right hand finds purchase on your ass, squeezing tightly pushing you closer to his body and his other hand grabs the back of your head, deepening the kiss. You can feel your underwear sticking on your dump heat and you squeeze your legs together trying to give yourself some comfort. Baekhyun breaks the kiss, bringing his lips next to your ear. 

“Is my baby wet?Again?”, he cooes and you wanna smack him across the face because he fucking knows you are. 

 “Yes I am, and if you don’t do something about it soon I’m gonna have to get myself off”, you lilt and turn to enter his room. It’s way cosier than you would have imagined, with a queen size bed in the middle. You seat at the edge of it and you open your legs as seductively as you can, covering the fact that they’re shivering in anticipation. He enters the room and his eyes are darker than before, his erection clearly visible through his boxers making your mouth water. You cock an eyebrow at him but he doesn’t move. That’s it, you can’t waste anymore time waiting for him to do something. You get up and get on your knees in front of him, removing his underwear with a single movement before you place your palm around his shaft. 

 “What the fuck Y/N”, he breathes out and his knees turn weak under your touch. 

 “I’m done waiting for you Byun. Took you 2 years to kiss me. I can’t imagine how long it’ll take you to fuck me”, he is about to protest when you lean forward, putting his dick in your mouth, your nose against his lower belly. His complain turns into a moan when he throws his head back, hands now landing in your hair, pulling slightly. Your lips move around his member, followed by your tongue, hand resting on his balls slightly massaging them. You lick a long stripe from the base of his dick, all the way to the end while pressing your lips around it and then release it with a slight ‘pop’.  A string of saliva connecting your mouth with his tip. You open your eyes only to find his intense stare already on your frame, cheeks on fire and mouth agape in an attempt to inhale as much air as he can. 

 “Do you have any idea how fucking sexy you look right now? I swear I would do anything, anything you want If I could only see you like this everyday”, his voice cracks at the last words and he is slightly releasing his grip on your hair. Your hand still working its way up and down his dick, you tilt your head onwards to give small kitty licks on his tip. You take his hand and while serving him a cheeky smile you place it so that his fingers are cupping the upper part of your neck, right under your jaw. It takes him a moment to understand what you’re thinking and when it hits him, he lets out a desperate breath. You move your chin in front of his dick, lips almost touching his slit currently dripping with pre-cum. 

 “Apologise for being an asshole these last few months”, you spit. 

 “Fuck you”. The moment the words slip his lips you open your mouth, taking him so deep that you can feel his tip touching the back of your throat. He moans out your name and you feel your pussy pulsating in the sound. It takes all the self control you can manifest in order to not sneak your fingers inside your knickers and relieve some of the tension. 

 “I can feel my dick down your throat baby, agh fuck”, he hisses and pulls your hair as you take him as deep as you can once again only that this time you keep him there, swallowing again and again with his dick buried as deep as your throat can take it. A tear rolls down your face and your gag reflex is threatening to kick in, but you refuse to let go before he begs. 

 “Fuck Y/N, please. please stop, I don’t wanna cum. Fuck please, don’t-”, you release him and you snap him your best victory smile. after whipping your mouth with the back of your palm. You get up and move towards the bed, this time laying on top of it. 

“I think I prefer you begging than apologising”, you tease and an unintentional giggle follows. 

 “You fucking bitch”, he spits jokingly and you burst into laughter but it doesn’t last long. The next moment he is hovering on top of you, lips on yours, hands cupping every curve of your body unable to hold back anymore. He is devouring your neck, jaw and moves lower to leave dark marks on your breasts. In a swing movement he unclips your bra, throwing it behind him next to his long forgotten underwear. Your underwear is next and before you know it, his face is resting between your legs, blowing tiny waves of air on your heat, driving you crazier if that was even possible at this point. He plants small kisses around the area, next to your folds while his hands are massaging the inside of your thighs. Your head falls back to meet his soft pillow and you moan out his name,  incapable of hiding the mess he has made of you. Without any warning his soft tongue crushes on your burning area, devouring you as if you were his last meal. Your head is now a foggy mess, hands tangled between his silver locks unconsciously pushing him against your pussy, desperate for more friction. He rests his tongue on your sensitive bud of nerves, dancing in slow circles when he enters two digits in you causing you to let out the most animalistic moan you’ve ever heard yourself producing. Your reaction was the confirmation he was seeking, as his tongue picks up its pace and so do his fingers, his name rolls off your tongue like a cursed poem, again and again until you can feel yourself falling off the edge. He lands a last kiss on your pubic bone as he slowly climbs up your body, now hovering above you. You open your eyes, realising you had them wide shut all this time, only to find his beautiful brown ones staring at you in the most loving way you’ve ever had anyone looking at you.

“So pretty”, he whispers and his fingers linger on your lips and make their way to your cheek where he leaves a shy kiss. You can feel his dick between your legs, yours thrown around his waist and you just stay there, in silence looking in each others eyes. You bring your hand to the side of his jaw only to pull him closer, planting a kiss on his lips. It’s not deep; it’s soft, and sweet, almost romantic. You break it after a few seconds and you rest your forehead on his. A word is about to escape your lips when he frantically drives his length inside you, hitting your g spot so hard that you almost choke at your own gasp.

“Baek, fuck”, you whine. He doesn’t say anything, he only pulls out a little bit and then thrusts back in, hitting that sweet spot that has you seeing stars. He does it again and again and again and you are a moaning mess, head thrown back, his diving in the crook of your neck, sucking, bitting, leaving purple spots in every area he can get his lips on.

“You want me to stop?”, he says out of breath without slowing down at the slightest. You attack his lips and the kiss is nothing like the one you just shared a few moments ago. It’s hungry and desperate and your tongues are fighting for dominance, both your mouths swallowing each others moans. You can feel your pussy throbbing around his dick and you know you wont last long. Baekhyun breaks the kiss but stays close so that his lips can still touch yours.

“Are you close baby? You want to cum? Want to come all over my dick?”, he breathes out and you moan out his name, paralysed under his touch.

“Baek I’m close-I’m gonna..”, a circular move of his hips almost brings you to the brink and you moan out cusses with no meaning. You clench around him once more and he lets out a loud groan.

“Y/N If you do that one more time I won’t be able to hold back. Please”, he pleads and you can see that he is trying to hold back so that you can finish first. His dick fucking into you at a relentless pace has your arms pulling his body closer to yours, nails digging in his back and you know these scratches will be visible for next few days.

“Baek I can’t hold it, please”, you moan out.

“Let go baby, let go. Cum for me”, he whispers next to your ear and there’s nothing in the world you want more than to feel him painting your insides with his orgasm.

“Cum inside Baek, Please, cum with me, ah-”, your orgasm hits you mid-sentence and you clench again and again as it keeps attacking your body in waves. After a couple thrusts you can feel him releasing into you as he lets his body collapse on top of yours, both of you battling to calm your breathing.

“I blame you for missing on the best sex I’ve ever had for the past two years”, you tease him softly and he chuckles. You raise your hand to place a stray hair behind his ear and you can’t help but notice the slight rosiness on his cheeks. ‘what?’, you ask flushing him your warmest smile.

“Be mine?”, his lets out as he rubs his nose against the tip of yours. Your heart skips a bit and a wave of warmth crushes through you, for you haven’t felt so happy in a long, long time.

“Hm, nope, thanks”, you giggle and you kiss him. He is taken aback by your reply, staring at you with eyes wide open like a frightened deer caught in the headlights.

“I’m joking baby”, you spit and burst into laughter.

“You bitch”, he laughs.

[kwonhoshi0]

𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 | drabble

requests>open | navigation

pairing : bakugou x fem!reader

genre : fluff, angsty

request : can i request a bakugou x reader where he says something really mean to the reader and she gets really upset and gives him silent treatment and he tries to make it up to her.

> quirk : eleven stranger things : telekinesis <

you and bakugou had been dating for months now, one of the reasons he fell for you is because you have never been afraid of him or afraid of stranding up to him which immediately got his attention, this particular day you were all training and bakugou was against todoroki.

todoroki said some things back to bakugou when they were fighting which you didn’t hear but it annoyed bakugou, after your match against denki you all went to the dorms for your weekend off, you knocked on your boyfriends door to see if he was doing okay, you walked in ‘what the fuck do you want’ you knew he was upset and you got quite used to his explosive anger and knew he didnt mean it, ‘what happened’ you sat next to him, ‘why do you fucking care?’ he got up and sat in his desk chair away from you, ‘if it’s about what todoroki said to you, i don’t know what he said but whatever it is it doesn’t matter, you’re doing great and you’re working so hard. he scoffed and turned to you ‘what like you are? the only reason you won to dunce face is because you know his weak spots if that was a real villain you would’ve lost, besides i don’t need fucking reassurance i know i’m working hard i don’t need a distraction to tell me that’ you stared at him with tears in your eyes, with that you walked out, tears rolling down your face, you knew he was upset but he had no right to take it out on you like that, you went downstairs before putting on your shoes to get some air ‘woah y/n what’s wrong’ mina came up to you along with denki and kirishima, ‘it’s fine just bakugou, but i’ll be okay i just need air’ they looked at you with sad eyes before they could say anything else you ran out, you never let your guard down so they knew it must’ve been bad, as soon as you ran out bakugou ran downstairs, denki saw him and said ‘dude what did you say to her’, ‘where did she go, i fucked up’. mina stood up ‘she was sobbing bakugou what the fuck did you do’, guilt consumed him ‘i was angry i didn’t mean to take it out on her’ he called you but you ignored him.

‘y/n? what are you doing here?’ you went to the facilities not really thinking about where you were going, you looked up at midoriya and todoroki training ‘sorry i’ll go i didn’t mean-‘.. ‘no no it’s okay are you okay?’ you nodded a little before sitting down and shaking your head, ‘it’s fine i just got into a fight with bakugou and i need to control myself i shouldn’t be crying like this’ you smiled weakly at the boys, ‘look y/n you’re so composed all the time that must be hard, letting go isnt a bad thing, i cry all the time’ the green haired boy laughed, ‘y/n i should apologise it was me who riled him up’ you looked at todoroki ‘no no mather what you said to him he had no right to take it out on me’.

you stayed with the boys for a while training with them, that weekend you decided to avoid bakugou, purposefully waking up before he does and making plans so you didn’t run into him, ‘mina, ochako do you guys want to go shopping i don’t really want to be in the dorms all day’ thankfully they agreed and you spent the day with them, you felt a little empty from not spending your morning with bakugou, you always woke up together on saturday mornings and got breakfast.

‘wheres y/n?’ bakugou asked everyone in the common room, ‘she went shopping with mina and ochako’ todoroki spoke, ‘and how is it you know before her boyfriend does icyhot’.. ‘well if you treated her well then maybe she wouldn’t have been with me and midoriya last night’, he made midoriya explain, ‘well she walked in not really realising where she was and she didn’t say much only that you guys fought..kaachan what happened’ midoriya hesitated, ‘i fucked up i was angry and i told her she’s just a distraction’ he put his head in his hands, ‘bakugou what the fuck’.

once you all got home it was late, you purposefully made sure it was late hoping bakugou was in bed by now, mina had also asked if you wanted to have a sleepover with her and ochako which you agreed to. you all walked in it was almost 12am and much to your dismay the angry blonde now frustrated blonde was sat in the common area, you didn’t want to talk to him in the slightest you couldn’t deal with that right now, ‘y/n wait can we talk’ you ignored him and went up the stairs to minas dorms, ‘deserved but you’re going to have to talk to him at some point you know?’ you wanted desperately to go back to how things were but you weren’t going to let him off so easily, maybe you were overthinking it too much but it hurt you a lot more than you’d like to admit ‘just a distraction’.

that monday you walked to class with midoriya and todoroki instead of bakugou. you’ve always sat a couple rows behind bakugou with denki, ‘have you talked to him yet’ you shook your head ‘i’m avoiding him, it just hurts so fucking much, i thought i meant more to him’ he smiled hugging you from the side ‘it’ll be okay y/n’. you didn’t look up but you knew from kirishimas hair that bakugou and kirishima had walked in, that day you had training with the whole class which means you probably had to pick pairs thankfully todoroki picked you, which made the blonde sigh. you tried not to take your anger out on the match, everyone realised you were doing a lot better than usual in reward you beat todoroki disabling him by propelling yourself up with your quirk and jumping on him causing him to fall and you took that second to push his hands down with the force from your quirk, the only problem was the position you were in, you were sat on todorokis stomach while he was layed on the ground and you didn’t think anything of it but bakugou did. aizawa noticed you were doing a lot better than usual, ‘y/n have you been training outside of class’ you nodded, ‘i just checked the logs.. y/n you’re doing great and improving fast but don’t push yourself, i can see the scratches on your hands from overusing your quirk’. usually bakugou was there when you trained to give you breaks so you didn’t overdo it.

‘y/n please at least fucking look at me’ you had just cleaned yourself up and turned to him, ‘this is driving me insane y/n’ you looked at him with sad eyes meeting his equally as sad ones, ‘i know i fucked up you’re not a distraction you’re so much fucking more than that, i should never have taken it out on you’ you looked at him about to say something and then todoroki walked past you, cleaning himself up after your sparring. ‘do you like him’ you scoff, ‘bakugou he and midoriya were there for me afterwards, they were there for me after you fucked up, of course i like him we’re friends?’. after a second you realised what he meant ‘wait you thought i liked him like that?.. why would you even think that’ he walked a little closer to you ‘just the way you disabled him...’ it was clear he had been overthinking as well which made your eyes soften, ‘baby please let me make it up to you..’ he whispered, you know how much he must love you from how upset he looks. he looked in your eyes, you let out a couple tears making him pull you into his arms ‘i’m so sorry i’ll make it up to you okay?���.

A/N :

lowkey hate this dhdhhdb

taglist : @blazedbakugou @todoroki-shoto-is-life

[liam-93-productions]

Liam’s full interview with Tings Magazine - Part 1

Note: the interview was recorded in may 2020.

Justin Campbell: What is the weirdest YouTube/Instagram trend hole that you’ve fallen into? Liam: One that always gets me is putting Mentos in Pepsi or Coke. We all know what happens, but we have to watch the ending. I’ve seen it about fifty times, and it doesn’t change. But it’s weird finding out what things are interesting when you’re stuck inside. It’s a crazy ride watching the world react to this. It’s almost like everybody’s become a street performer. You see these people on the street who have a special skill like magic and the internet is now the place for that and everybody does it. 

Do you feel pressured to participate? Is there currency in that? Does that keep you relevant? I think artists have had to change a lot to fit in. There used to be mystery where you didn’t know too much about their lives, whereas we are in my living room now for all the world to see. I think that’s the biggest change of these newer platforms. I think you have to join in if you want to stay relevant. If you look at someone like Jason Derulo, he has 19 million followers on TikTok and he just started. His old songs are re-charting because of the TikTok chart. So, you can’t just make music and expect it to go well anymore. There has to be a personality and a story. It’s not quite the same anymore. 

There’s so many differente avenues to keep up with. There’s Instagram, YouTube, TikTok. It used to be you did radio, tours and late-night television. Now there seem to be a dozen things to do.  It’s crazy, this last promo schedule for me, having to do it indoors. I had to learn how to do a bunch of different jobs for the people that couldn’t be here. We put up a green screen in my lounge. We moved all the sofas, me and the camera guy that is staying with me set up the green screen and then you have to film it as well. It’s just crazy the amount of different things that you have to get involved in right now to stay relevant. And that’s all it is. The majority of the stuff isn’t really doing anything, but it’s doing loads at the same time if that makes sense. It’s a difficult thing to get used. And also, things have gotten jovial. So, you have to learn to make fun of ourselves. You can’t be Mr. Serious pop-star anymore. People aren’t really attracted to that anymore. People like the fun side of you, your personality and your humor come through on these things. It’s crazy. I thought about when I joined TikTok the other week, there’s a pressure to film something fun. But then if you are not having fun filming it, you’re not going to film a fun video. And I didn’t want to live my life every day thinking I got to film a video or nobody is going to care. I spent an hour trying to think of stuff and I don’t want to live my life like this. I enjoy then. I like going on TikTok and getting lost in a little TikTok rabbit hole, we all do, but I don’t know if I’m that way inclined mentally. 

With the need to share more, to share a comedic side or a vulnerable side, where do you draw the line? When do you stop sharing? How much of it is constructed sharing and how much of it is authentic sharing? It’s difficult. I’m very prone to enjoy a moment rather than take my camera out and film it. I’m always one of those people who take a picture of a sunset and then never look at it and say why did I bother taking the picture. I’d rather enjoy the moment. We live in a day and age where the camera phone is people’s first thought for things. And I’m just not one of those people. Humorous stuff will happen and it will be off the cuff, but we didn’t film it. And it will be like “aw, should we recreate it?” But we don’t want to recreate it. It just feels stupid. It always feels forced in that sense. So for me, I definitely struggle with sharing moments.  And you have those people out there, who are literally willing to do anything. There’s a trend for people who are shaving their eyebrows off at the moment. I’m not going to shave my eyebrows off so people will care a little more. That just doesn’t register with me. You have Jake and Logan Paul, who do a lot of crazy, crazy things to get noticed. And it’s like where do you draw the line. 

These platforms make it challenging to carve out a private life. People expect more and more of celebrities’ lives to be shared. They feel they have ownership of every aspect of people’s lives. What are your thoughts on that? From the start of this lockdown, the first James Corden TV performance was filmed in the lounge and we went through my whole house. I can remember back in the day when a newspaper sent out the photos of my house. I don’t like people knowing where I sleep because it’s a security problem for me. I had a big complaint about that. Now fast forward 5-6 years and the world has changed to where nothing is really a private or intimate moment. It’s strange. As One Direction, we were in an era on the rise of Twitter. I think Twitter helped us a lot. It was the way we trended on Twitter that actually made us famous. But being on the cusp of that internet stardom, we didn’t really care about how many followers [we had].  Now, it’s become a currency. I just struggle to take those things seriously, that it is part of the job because it feels so foreign. When we had apps as kids, there was no way to becoming MSN famous. Now kids want to be an Instagrammer or a TikTokker. It’s crazy. We never had that. 

You said something about people chasing the currency of liked and follows. Kids are thinking about that validation when they are creating content. How much of that are you thinking about it when you create music or social media/video content? I think, for me, I don’t often pay attention to how many likes thing gets. As a pop star, you have to have an average amount per post. We have to have meetings now where people will go through posts, and tell you why this works. Which for me, it seems insane, but you have this persona that you have to keep up online. And definitely, when posting certain things, you are gauging whether it’s going to get a reaction or there’s no point in posting it. And that’s always been the problem for me. I’m hoping for a big reaction for stuff which limits the amount you post because you think there’s no point posting this.  Often the people who do the best in these scenarios are the people that didn’t mean for it to happen. Someone makes a little challenge like The Ice Bucket Challenge. Someone thought I’ll do this. It will be fun for us to film and because they are having fun, everyone is like we will get involved. If you think about it too much, it will overtake you. For the longest time, I didn’t post a lot. I got off of Twitter because of the backlash and the fact that you are always going to annoy someone with a post. I was like, I can’t deal with it. I might as well keep it to myself. There’s no disappointment. 

I think that’s part of the condition of being an artist. You crave a certain amount of validation.  When it’s work, you can take that some people won’t get it. But because everything has become so personal now like it’s about you. You sell your personality to people. It’s like if someone asks you “what five things do you want people to know about you”. And everyone goes, well, I’d like to be... You suddenly think, what we are doing every day online is trying to sell ourselves.  It’s a difficult balance. You have to have the right amount of humor and humility and the right amount of this. It’s so difficult to find that person. And you see people who become caricatures of themselves online. They overdo it. You don’t know what works any why it works. The internet is such an untested experiment. The public decides. It’s so crazy.

You just said that it can feel so personal, which I think is such an honest statement because when you are putting yourself out there, it is hard to celebrate the work and you. When people don’t like something, it can feel like they are personally attacking you.  It genuinely scares me sometimes. Even to post a selfie, because you just don’t know what the recipe is. I’m not trying to impress anyone. I’m just trying to stay around if that makes sense. I don’t know, it’s difficult. The fact that you just let it go and it’s gone and people either take it or leave it. It’s like jumping on stage every time you post, which scares me anyway. 

You’ve spoken pretty openly about dealing with depression and anxiety. How does this level of exposure impact your ability to manage your anxiety? Before all of this started, the first day of school would probably be when you are your most anxious. Or it’s your own clothes day and you don’t know what to wear. That feels like what everyone is going through every single day online. It’s like the teen generation has so many more questions to answer that we had. I know as a kid I was quite stressed. I can’t imagine how these kids feel these days.  The only way I can relate is by how I feel in this scenario. Obviously, being a little bit older, you are a little wiser with it. I thinks it’s a different kind of pressure these days. It’s a worldwide pressure. The fact that anyone can become a superstar overnight or also the most embarrassing thing in the world and the line is that thin. I can’t imagine what is like for kids growing up in that scenario. For me, it’s raised a lot of questions about my mental health and having to deal with these things. I’ve been running a pilot with someone for people in my position, people who struggle with fame, with the position that they get themselves. You don’t really realize the playbook you’re pressing. Once you’re in it, you’re in it.  I started from 14-16, were my two start years. And the only answer that people had for you was that you’ve got have thick skin. But I don’t think that’s really the point because once you are here, you have to find out if your skin is thick enough. You have to learn. For the longest time, if somebody wrote something about me in the press, I’d rise back up and bring back up. I didn’t realize they were trying to bait me out because they knew I’d do that. Then they’d write three more articles about the scenario that I didn’t want them to write about. You can only know that with years of experience. If something comes out now, I just leave it to die and go away and that’s it. I just think it’s difficult when people say the only answer is that you have to have thick skin to do this. 

That’s not really a solution. That’s just saying you asked for this. This is just part of it, which I don’t think is fair. Is fame something that you struggle with a lot? For me, there’s different periods, severe highs with different things and a lot of questions about stuff. I’ve been going at this now for ten years, which seems insane. I’m only 26 as well, which is quite a long time to be doing anything. And to be in this pressure cooker for that long is quite difficult, but I say I’ve learned to deal with it better now. Age and time are wonderful things. And we were buffered as teens. We had each other in the band. When I look at someone like Justin Bieber, I think no wonder he went completely mental at some point because there is no one in the world that knows what is like to be Justin Bieber, but Justin Bieber. He had no one to share it with. We had each other to share it with, to remember it with and be reminded how to behave, how to act. You shouldn’t do that. It was tough at some points, but for the most part it was helpful growing up in that team exercise rather than be let off on your own and you’re the most famous person in the world. It must have been pretty crazy for him. 

[greatbigbellies]

The @wesoftupinhere oneshot... that turned into a fourshot... but hey it’s content right? Features wholesome preg content, light stuffing, rapid pregnancy, and heavy multiples. Hope you enjoy it!

Kyle lounged in his gamer chair, his full term pregnant belly resting in his lap. He Took a hand off of the mouse to rub small circles in the side of his distended tummy, soothing his little boy inside. Both Kyle and his baby had been restless lately, anxious to meet each other, and Kyle was particularly ready to be done with pregnancy. It wasn’t a bad gig, mind you, lots of food and attention. However, being so heavy and achy all the time was draining. He’d been going for 38 weeks now, and his 5’5” frame was growing weary of growing a baby. Almost there, he thought to himself. He returned his hand to his mouse to keep streaming. He was playing minecraft, half cause he enjoyed it, and half because it got donations. With the baby coming soon, he needed all the money he could get.

He shifted idly in his chair, struggling to get comfortable. “How far along are you?” asked one of his stream viewers. He got this question almost every day. “38 weeks, 3 days! Almost done!” he chirped. “Congrats!” said the viewer over chat. Kyle smiled. “You look so fatherly!” another chimed in. Kyle blushed a little, not sure how to take compliments. “Aww, thanks guys!” he replied.

“Can we see the tummy?” asked one particularly brave viewer. “Ooooh, I dunno guys, it’s kind of hard to move at this size,” he replied. A minute or so passed, Kyle idly harvesting his crops, when a donation rolled in. “Oh! Thanks for the twenty bucks! Wow! Let’s see…” he waited for the bit donation message to scroll by. “If I give you $20 will you show us the baby bump?” it asked. Kyle rolled his eyes and smiled. “You guys drive a hard bargain, but ooookay,” he grunted as he got to his feet, his hefty body trying to weigh him down. He turned to the side and rolled up his shirt to show his smooth, large belly to the facecam. His baby visibly kicked from the inside, much do the delight of the twitch chat.

“Pog!” “Pog baby!” “Pogchamp!” “Pogchamp!” “Pog baby!!” “He’s our little pogchamp!”... his chat exploded. Kyle laughed at the reaction, causing his tummy to bounce slightly. “Hahaha! Yeah, I guess he is our little pogchamp huh?” he said, half genuinely, half ironically. Twitch slang felt weird sometimes, but Kyle had to admit, it got results. He held his belly from below and gave it a little bounce as about $55 in donations rolled in, all saying variations of “pog baby”. Kyle smiled to himself as he heard Tyler come home. “Oop! My lunch is here! BRB!” he said as he paused the stream and put up his “returning soon” screen. He yanked his shirt down over his huge belly and waddled into the kitchen where Tyler sat, groaning and cradling his massive gut.

“Are you okay?” asked Kyle, thinking Tyler just overate again. “Oooohhh… too many burgers…” Tyler moaned. “Why didn’t you wait until you got home to eat?” asked Kyle. “I was gonna… but they smelled so good… and pregnancy cravings won out…” he explained between breaths. “Dude, feel my belly...! It’s so full!” Kyle shrugged. He’d felt Tyler’s tummy a million times over his pregnancy, he didn’t expect this to be any different. He was wrong. “Whoa… dude, how much did you eat?” he asked, prodding his best friend’s massively overstuffed belly. It felt insanely firm, especially on the lower hemisphere. Tyler’s belly was already huge, what with triplets crammed in there, and he had a habit of gorging himself now and again. “For the babies” he’d always say. This felt different though. It was like he was… more pregnant than before…

“Uuuh, just like… two burgers, fries, a side of onion rings, and a large shake… a normal lunch!” said Tyler. Kyle would have rolled his eyes if he wasn’t concerned. He compared the firmness of hIs own belly with his friend’s. Both were very full, sure, and had little give, but Tyler’s… his felt downright overfilled. Kyle rolled up his friend’s shirt to inspect the belly. It all looked fine as far as he could tell. More tightly stretched, sure, but no harsh blemishes or warning signs. “Soooo much pressure!...” complained Tyler. “Do you need to go to a doctor?” Tyler shook his head at Kyles question. “Nah dude, I’ll be fine… I just need some tummy rubs and time to digest…” he paused… “Wow, I must have overdone it more than I thought. I swear the burger just kicked…”

Kyle gave his friend a skeptical look. “Where did you get these? Burger King?” he asked. Tyler shook his head, placing both hands on his distended bare belly. “Nah bro… some new place that popped up next door. Nice portions…. I didn’t get the name though…” Kyle smiled at his friend. It’s just like him to order and eat from a place without knowing what it’s called. He glanced at the plain, brown paper bag the food came in, and grabbed his burger to examine the wrapping. “McPreggo? What kind of name is McPreggo?” he asked Tyler, who was zoned out rubbing his belly. “I dunno man… but the babies sure liked it and I did too… maybe too much, ough,” he let out a dainty little belch.

Kyle shrugged. It did smell amazing. He unwrapped his burger, and took a bite. “Oh my god…” he trailed off with a mouth full. “W-what?” asked Tyler. “This… is the tastiest thing I’ve ever eaten!” Kyle beamed. This was like eating his favorite food, while sating a craving for a different favorite food, while discovering a NEW favorite food all at once. The patty was grilled to perfection, the bun was fluffy, the veggies were moist and crisp, and whatever that reddish sauce was was simply astonishing.

“I can see why you would overdo it on this food Tyler, THIS… IS… AMAZING!” Tyler smirked at his friend. “And you doubted by tastes…” he said jokingly, patting his overfilled belly. Kyle continued to demolish the burger at a frightening pace. “Dude… I once saw you dip sweet potato fries in cake icing… your tastes are bizarre,” pointed out Kyle between bites. “Eeny, and Meeny wanted the fries and Miney wanted the icing!” Tyler defended himself, referring to his triplets by their nicknames.

Kyle felt the weight of his pregnant tummy tug downward, his sore back reminding him that standing for too long wasn’t a good idea in his state. He waddled over and took a seat between Tyler and the table of food. “Speaking of fries… you didn’t eat them all, did you?” he asked. Tyler shook his head, “Nah man, I specifically left yours alone. They’re in the bag, you gotta try them. They put some garlic salt or something on ‘em,” Uncannily, Kyle found himself craving garlic at the mere mention of it. He took the last bite of his burger, and stuck his arm down the bag to fish out his prize.

Tyler rubbed large circles on the distended sides of his massive belly, soothing both his overfilled stomach and his aching womb. He felt Eeny, Meeny, and Miney all snuggled in his gut… and he could SWEAR he felt three other bodies in there too, but that was impossible. He was just overfed, surely. He turned to watch Kyle basically drink the fries out of the carton. He hadn’t seen his friend put away food like this since his second trimester… dude must’ve been starving. He thought to himself.

Tyler furrowed his brow at the sight of Kyle’s tummy slowly pushing outward, his shirt visibly riding up as he ate. Kyle seemed too enamored with the food to notice. “And you got me onion rings?! God I love you Ty, you know how to treat a guy,” Kyle laughed as he found the second side hidden in the bag. “Y-yeah, no problem…” Tyler trailed off, still focusing on his friend’s tummy. “How are you feeling?” he asked. Kyle crunched on a perfectly seasoned onion ring, “Like I’m in heaven!” he replied, an adorable grin on his face.

Tyler felt his own tummy again, really taking the time to feel it. He felt for where most of the pressure in his belly was coming from. His stomach? Check. His womb? Also check… He felt around, outlining the tiny bodies in his head. 1… 2… 3… his eyes widened. He reached over and felt Kyles belly, a sizable crescent of bare skin showing as his shirt continued to ride up. Kyle was too busy enjoying onion rings to care. They felt each other’s babies all the time, so this wasn’t out of the ordinary.

Tyler concentrated on the movement under Kyle’s skin, feeling where the kicks and rolls where coming from. Kyle’s baby was really active in there… almost too active… “Hey Kyle…?” “Mhmmm?” Kyle finished off the last two onion rings in one bite. Tyler looked at him, and with the most uncharacteristically serious tone he could muster, said “Show me where your little pogchamp is,” Kyle snorted out a giggle. “You were just feeling him! He’s right there!” Kyle guided Tyler’s hand to his lower belly, right below his now exposed navel, where a tiny foot was pressed against his palm.

Tyler nodded. He felt movement stir in his own belly, and squinted in concentration. As if on cue, a stong kick pushed its way up into the top shelf of Kyle’s tummy, distending it. That made Kyle jump a little, “Wow okay… guess he’s up there…” Kyle paused. “Wait that’s not right…” he rolled up his shirt, now much tighter than it was this morning, and placed his hands on the top and bottom of his belly, Tyler’s hands taking up the front. They made eye contact as they both came to the realization that this felt familiar… on Tyler.

“Am I… carrying TRIPLETS?!?!” Kyle yelled in surprise. “I...I think so?” replied Tyler. “And I think I’ve got six… I think… the food…” he stared at the empty brown paper bag in the table. “Nononono… wait that’s not right…” Kyle explored his own expanded belly. His midriff was now undoubtedly larger than before and he felt three distinct bodies inside… “How does that work?” asked Tyler, drumming the top of his own sextuplet belly in thought. Kyle shook his head in bewilderment. “It’ll be okay… we’ll get Sarah, Bree, and Brook on the phone. They do this stuff for a living, they’ll be able to help us!” said Kyle, half to himself in an effort to stay calm. “Yeah! If anyone will understand spontaneous babies, it’ll be them!” said Tyler with a cautiously optimistic smile. “Problem solved!”

Kyle tried to stand up, but found himself stuck to his seat due to the new weight. He tried again, making little progress. “Uh… problem not quite solved,” he looked sheepishly at Tyler. “Will you… help me up?” he asked. Tyler jokingly leaned back, causing his truly massive tummy to stick out just that little bit father. “I dunno bro… I’m like… SUPER pregnant right now,” he grinned, his sextuplets visibly moving in his overburdened belly. Kyle crossed his arms and pouted. “Well I’M super pregnant and super SHORT so I need help,” he replied. Tyler laughed, “Well, you got me there dude, gimme a sec,”

Tyler scooted forward and spread his knees apart to make room for his pendulous belly, then he leaned forward, taking the weight off of his butt and onto his feet, before slowly straightening his legs. He pressed his hands into his lower back to help guide his torso into a vertical position, his mammoth belly sticking out far in front of him. The sudden change of position did not sit well with his cargo, and they roiled around in his overstretched gut. “Oof, guys, come on…” he pleaded with his babies, but they didn’t relent. He took his steps slowly, movement difficult at that size, and approached Kyle. “Alright dude, gimme your hands,” Tyler reached out, his belly reaching almost as far as his arms.

Kyle took his hands and, with a heave and some backwards motion from Tyler, got up to a standing position. “Whooo, okay,” said Kyle breathlessly. “God… how do you do this all the time?” he asked, cradling his triplet heavy belly. Tyler smiled, holding his own tummy in his hands, “Lots of food, lots of sleep, and lots of belly rubs,” Kyle smirked at the wholesomeness that was Tyler, and waddled over to his phone. “Alright… lets hope the girls aren’t busy…”

About an hour later, there was a firm knock at the door, no doubt from Brook. “Door’s unlocked!” called Kyle, resting on the couch, laying lengthwise to take up all three cushions. Tyler sat in the recliner, the footrest put up to support his legs, and his huge belly, which rested between them. The door swung open to reveal Sarah and Brook, Sarah herself sporting a solidly second trimester belly. “Sorry we were so slow, had to meet with a client,” apologized Sarah, patting her tummy for emphasis. “So what’s this about a ‘baby emergency’? If you’re in labor just to go the hospital!” said Brook, reading something on her phone. The two stepped inside, closing the door behind them, and Sarah was the first to see the thoroughly expanded boys.

“Uh, Brook, I think they have the opposite problem,” said Sarah. Brook glanced up from her phone to take in the sight of Tyler carrying six babies. “Oh my god did you go to a buffet?” she asked. Tyler shook his head, “Nope, just McPreggo!” he grinned, showing the cute gap between his teeth. “McWhat-now?” Sarah asked. “Some new restaurant Ty found, we think the food spontaneously fills your womb!” explained Kyle. “In fairness, the food IS amazing and almost worth it,” Tyler interjected. Sarah grimaced a little. She knew Tyler was a foodie, but was it really worth all THIS?

“Where’s Bree?” asked Kyle. “She’s, uh, getting us lunch. We were going to cook, but when we got the call from you we rushed over,” Sarah explained. Kyle nodded, “thanks for that, by the way,” he smiled. Sarah grinned sympathetically back, “so, uh, how many do you guys have now?” she asked. “Kyle’s got three now, and I’ve got six!” Tyler drummed the top shelf of his belly, stirring the occupants inside. “Yikes,” said Brook monotonously to no one in particular, back to looking at her phone. 

Sarah looked at the table, covered in McPreggo wrappers and pursed her lips in thought. Maybe the packaging had a clue? She walked over to the dining area and looked over the fry cartons and burger wrappers. She wished Brook would help, but she seemed too busy on her phone. Sarah examined the label on the wrapper and saw tiny font that read “Quantum Noms LLC” in the corner. As she puzzled over what it could mean, Brook put her phone in her pocket and sighed. “Sarah, I love you, but you’re doing it the hard way. I already figured it out,”

Everyone looked at Brook in surprise. “You did?” asked Kyle. “Yeah, dude, I googled ‘McPreggo’ and read like… half a news article. Did you guys forget you could look things up on the internet?” she asked sarcastically. “Yeah, kinda,” shrugged Tyler from his seat. Brook rolled her eyes. “It’s a marketing thing. McPreggo food is designed to taste amazing to pregnant people, so they make food that uses some quantum physics BS to get their customers pregnant with, like, I dunno… copies of babies from the multiverse or some shit. Then they come back, eat more food, get more pregnant, and McPreggo rolls in the profits. It’s all harmless and temporary, you’ll be fine…” Brook trailed off. “...In 24 hours,” Tyler sighed happily and leaned back, causing his torpedo belly to agle up slightly.

“Oh good, so Eeny, Meeny, Miney, and Pogchamp are all safe, and we don't have to birth and care for extra babies,” said Tyler. “Problem solved… and now I can eat there again guilt free!” he grinned. “No!” everyone shouted. Tyler pouted, “but… it was so yummy…” Kyle sighed. “Okay… ONE burger every 24 hours… and you don’t get to complain about being too pregnant to do things!” he offered. Tyler laughed, causing his belly to bounce a tad. “Yeah, I’m already there BEFORE the food! Ha!” his mouth curled into a shit eating grin. Then, there was a shuffling at the door.

“Guys…? I need some help!” called Bree. Brook rolled her eyes and went over to the door, Sarah joining the boys in the living area. Brook opened the door and her jaw dropped. Bree stood there, her arms full of fast food bags, and her belly jutting out farther than Tyler’s, bare and sporting a popped belly button. “Thanks! I couldn’t reach the door past my tummy!” Bree slowly waddled past Brook and into the kitchen, garnering stares from everyone else. “I found this new restaurant! It’s really really good! I wasn’t sure what you guys wanted so I bought one of everything, though I might’ve eaten a bunch of it on the way here!” she said, a smile in her voice. “It’s soooo good though, I couldn’t help myself! I went after picking up Mrs. Buck’s twins, and I ate so much, now the twins have a bunch of friends! Isn’t it great!? It’s like a party in my belly!”

Tyler smiled a huge, toothy grin, “one of everything you say?” Sarah shook her head, but caught a whiff of the food and immediately understood why Tyler wanted more. Kyle eyed the pile of food on the table and felt his mouth water. He looked down at his triplet heavy belly… surely one more wouldn’t hurt? Brook, the only non-pregnant person there, grasped the bridge of her nose as she felt a headache building. This was about to get messy.

Bree sat down in the wooden chair next to the table full of food, causing it to creak under her septuplet pregnancy weight. Her tummy stuck out past her knees, and forced her legs apart from its sheer size. She grabbed a double bacon burger and offered it out to Brook. “Come on Brook! I know you’re hungry!” she smiled, genuinely not seeing the problem with her offer. Brook shook her head. “No way. I’m going to have to take on enough brats from all of you, I don’t need to start brewing my own!” she said. Bree shrugged. “More for meeee!” as she was about unwrap the sandwich, Brook stepped forward and snatched it out of her hands. “Are you kidding me? Look at you?! You’ll pop if you eat this!”

Sarah eyed the table of amazing smelling fast food and considered her options… she considered how much Bree must have spent on all of this… considered how awful it would be for this delectable feast to go to waste. “Um… Brook, it’d be a shame if we threw all of this away…” she said meekly. Brook gave an electric glare and threw her hands up in exasperation. “FINE! You all stuff yourselves and get huge with a bunch of quantum babies! I’m not taking any off of your hands when you’re all to big to move!” “Too late,” Tyler chipped in. “Aw, c’mon Tyler! I’m bigger than you! Surely you can still walk?” Bree bubbled. “Well yeah, but I don’t want to…” Tyler eyed the burger in Brook’s hand. “Hey Brook, you eatin’ that or what?”

Brook rolled her eyes and tossed him the burger, eliciting a tongue click and a finger gun from Tyler. Kyle shifted on the couch and slowly stood up, his relatively small frame struggling with just three. He pushed his hands into his lower back, and his shirt rode up all the way, leaving every square inch of pregnant belly on display. He waddled over to the table to see what was left. Sarah quickly joined him, her singleton belly feeling somewhat empty. Brook sat on the now empty couch and gave everyone a scornful look in turn. She knew she was going to have to clean this up.

Kyle tentatively grabbed a mild chicken sandwich while Sarah scooped up the 4 sliders and a side of onions rings. Bree grabbed the spicy chicken sandwich and the last remaining food item, the double jalapeno burger. Kyle and Sarah each sitting on the floor in front of the couch, not wanting to get TOO close to the grumpy Brook, Tyler on his recliner and Bree in her kitchen chair, the crew got to work decimating the McPreggo.

Tyler unwrapped the double bacon burger and started in on it, taking large, heaping bites that required him to chew for a somewhat extended period of time. The lettuce, tomato, bacon, cheese, and patty all tasted so good together, the flavors melded perfectly into the exact thing he was craving in that moment. As far as Tyler was concerned, McPreggo had earned his business. It was hard to argue with food that tasted this good. One hand held the sandwich, and the other rested on the shelf of his belly. As he devoured the sandwich, he felt the skin of his tummy shift under his fingers. Was that kicking? No, he was very familiar with that feeling. This... was growth.

Kyle sat cross legged on the floor, his triplet heavy belly resting on his folded ankles, and began eating the chicken sandwich. The cheese was an unexpected but welcomed touch, and the sauce, whatever it was, went perfect with the breading on the chicken. He polished off the sandwich in record pace, and placed his hands on the sides of his pregnant tummy, feeling it swell up between them. He was about to be pregnant with quadruplets, and wasn’t sure how he felt about it.

Next to him, Sarah was in a frenzy. The usually demure and subtle woman was downing sliders in two bites, and eating multiple onion rings in one chomp. This was amazing tasting food, and was totally worth whatever pregnant discomfort awaited her. At least, that’s what she thought before she felt her pants tighten up, and the button pop open on is own. She looked down at herself to see her 24 week singleton belly slowly expand outward in all directions, filling her lap with addition after addition to her womb.

Bree had somehow already completely consumed the spicy chicken sandwich, and was most of the way through the jalapeno burger. She was a strong girl, and big muscles needed a lot of fuel. Big bellies, as it turned out, also needed a lot of fuel, as two more quantum babies filled her womb. With nine babies now roiling around in her belly, even Bree was having a hard time feeling comfortable, and slowly rose to her feet to pace, hoping to stretch her legs. Each footfall was heavy as her gargantuan nonuplet belly swayed in front of her.

Bree waddled over to Tyler, who was back to groaning and rubbing big circles around his tummy. “Whyyyy did I do this? This bellyache and pressure isn’t worth the taste of delicious fooood…” he groaned. His 7 babies rumbled in his belly, resting on the recliner’s footrest. Bree tentatively placed a hand on her friend’s tanker of a tummy, and nodded slowly. “Yeah, you’re really pregnant all right,” she said. “T-thanks Bree. I wasn’t sure there for a sec,” groaned Tyler, all in good humor, of course. 

Kyle struggled to unfold his legs under the weight of his tum. He swore he’d never complain about carrying his singleton son after this experience. He ran his hands around the equators of his belly, and leaned back against the couch, considering just staying there and sleeping this off.

Next to him was Sarah, who was in the process of seeing if she could still reach her bellybutton past her quadruplet belly. She could, barely. What she couldn’t do was fit in this shirt and pants anymore. She needed to get home and changed soon, having a big pregnant belly like this just hanging out felt so unprofessional. She moved to get up, but found she was too heavy to get off the floor with any real speed. Was it worth it for those sliders? It was, she decided, but only barely. “We should… urp… get home and… and digest,” said Sarah. “You buys gonna be okay?” she asked. “Mhmmm…” moaned Kyle sleepily. Tyler leaned back into the cushions of the recliner and grinned. “This… yeah, I can vibe with this…”

Bree took her hand off of Tyler’s belly, and waddled over to Sarah, one burning question on her mind. She looked expectantly at her friend as she struggled to get her feet under her. Sensing what was about to be asked, Brooks eyes lit up with exasperation. “On the way home… could we stop… for a snack?”