#As for why no one noticed her force sensitivity it's not...that strange? Rey and Luke didn't know what they were doing until they were

[drunk-on-starlight]

I get the impression fan reception to it would be mixed but Sabine having the force seems appropriate in a way that's difficult to describe.

[rushmanatalie]

and we’ll watch the world crumble (watch the world burn)

Summary: In a galaxy falling apart at its seams, two broken souls find solace in their forbidden connection. But when darkness threatens to destroy everything they know, Rey finds herself forced to choose between what can, and what could have been.

Chapter One

A/N: Of all the things I thought I would be doing this quarantine, I really didn’t expect writing my first reylo fic to be part of it but I guess here we are! Please be gentle, I’m still trying to get all my Star Wars lore correct :) 

Read on AO3 or under the cut:

Rey couldn’t sleep.

But then again, after everything that had happened since leaving Jakku, sleepless nights weren’t uncommon for her. Even in the comfort of a sizable cot in her own section of the cave, safe in the Resistance base on Ajan Kloss, Rey felt uneasy giving in to the vulnerability of sleep. As exhausted as she was, falling asleep meant putting her walls down and letting the nightmares and monsters in.

Monsters like him.

Every time she closed her eyes, she saw his. Warm brown irises flooded with desperation, looking at her, no, into her, as the world around them crashed and burned. In that moment, she saw him clearer than he would ever see himself: a terrified boy, pleading for acceptance and understanding, from a scavenger, nonetheless. She couldn’t help but wonder if he saw her too. Did he see how much she had wanted to take his hand? If only for some form of purpose and clarity, for a chance to no longer feel achingly lonely. Or had he seen the moment she made her decision? The moment she went for the saber.

Luke’s saber. Rey eyed the broken weapon sitting on a bench across from her bed. She had felt wrong in keeping it, knowing it was all the legendary Skywalker had left behind, but Leia’s insistence helped assuage her guilt.

“It’s what he would have wanted,” the general said softly, gently wrapping Rey’s fingers around the saber’s cracked hilt. “You might not think you’re the last Jedi, Rey. But you are the last hope.”

And what a burden it proved to be. Since her floating rock stunt saved the Resistance on Crait, everyone seemed to be constantly staring at her, almost eerily wary of her every move. For a girl who spent most of her life alone in a desert, Rey wasn’t used to being the center of so much attention. But what scared her the most was her inability to discern whether people were looking at her with curiosity or fear. Or, as Poe would put it, a healthy combination of both.

Getting to know Poe was, in many ways, like getting to know a droid. It was very clear from the start that the man was programmed for war. More than once, Rey has caught herself overhearing Poe and Leia discussing weaponry, strategies, treaties, and negotiations, all of which sound like another language to Rey. But Rey soon learned that Poe’s skills as commander were equally matched with his penchant for sarcasm and light-hearted jokes as he and Finn constantly bickered during meal breaks.

Finn, Rey was thrilled to see, had made a full recovery since she had last seen him wounded after the battle on Starkiller base. As her first, and now best friend, Finn shared Rey’s anxieties about fitting in with the Resistance. A turned stormtrooper wasn’t exactly a leading example of a light-side warrior, and though he never voiced his concerns to Rey, Rey could tell Finn was trying to prove his place among the Resistance ranks through his enthusiasm in volunteering for even the simplest of missions.

His new friend, Rose, however, was exactly what Rey imagined Resistance members were like. Of course, it didn’t take much for Rey to like Rose given that she had saved Finn’s life, but Rose was truly sunshine personified. Despite the recent loss of her sister, Rose never ceased to smile. Her kindness toward Rey was more than welcome amidst the wordless stares from most others, and for the first time in her life, Rey found herself glad to be in the company of a woman closer to her age.

Rey huffed a sigh at the thought. It felt so strange that almost a year ago she was alone on Jakku, barely getting by on the meager portions she was able to receive, waiting for a family that would never return. Now she’s a force-sensitive fighting a war, no longer hungry, no longer chained by her past. No longer alone.

She tossed around in her bed, her blankets every bit too warm, but the room too cold all at once. Closing her eyes, she tried to sleep, letting her mind drift ever so slightly, but to no avail.

Of course, the recent onslaught of piercing headaches didn’t help either. For the past couple weeks, Rey had been experiencing strange migraines. They all start with a slight disturbance in the force, an unexplainable shift that never fails to give Rey goosebumps. Then waves of pain crash through her mind without any more of a warning, as if her brain is being torn to shreds. Luckily for her, they often leave as suddenly as they come, but they’re never any less painful. Unable to do anything about it, the medical droids left Rey to wonder when the next headache would hit, and which one would ultimately kill her in the end.

“I wouldn’t count on it.”

The familiar presence slipped so suddenly into Rey’s mind, she sprang up from her sheets. How much had he just heard?

“Get out!”

Kylo Ren sat across from her on the bench, next to the broken shards of his uncle’s parting gift. She couldn’t tell where he was, and for her sake and the Resistance’s, she hoped he couldn’t either.

Rey allowed her eyes to roam over the Supreme Leader, a self defense tactic, she decided, to see if he appeared as a threat. She quickly noted the absence of his lightsaber and stopped herself from reaching for her blaster. Even though she knew from their previous encounters that the weapons didn’t work through their connection, it never hurt to be safe. He donned his usual black tunic and trousers, with heavy duty boots to match, but seemed to forego the formalities of his cape and cowl. The wide belt at his waist emphasized the broadness of his chest and shoulders. His folded hands remained gloved as he leaned forward, resting his forearms on his thighs.

And yet, the one thing that caught her attention the most was the lack of his mask.

Something about his face felt alluring to Rey, and not just in its undeniable vanity. Ever since he had first taken off his mask in front of her, Rey was aware of the vulnerability he allowed himself in her presence. As if she was the only person who could still see the slivers of Ben Solo behind his hardened facade.

Only there was no facade. Not this time. Kylo’s eyes were dark, red-rimmed with sleeplessness and—oh.

Sadness. No, this wasn’t just sadness. This was deeper than that. This was the kind of sadness that eats at the soul, even when there is nothing left but emptiness and a deep, dark ache, and Rey knew the feeling well. But she wasn’t easily fooled.

“I said, get out!”

“You know I would if I could.” He spoke calmly, with little to no antagonization, to Rey’s surprise. If anything, all she could detect was a hint of dejection in his tone.

Rey shook her head in denial. “I don’t understand. Why is this still happening? Snoke’s...”

Kylo’s eye twitched at the mention of his deceased master. “I’m sure you can put it together yourself.”

“He lied,” she finished, more for herself than for him. “Well, I can’t say I’m surprised given how the Sith usually deal with manipulation.” She looked at him to see if the jab had struck a nerve, but was disappointed when he remained passive to her comment.

He stood from his seat and walked to the door-like opening where Rey’s little nook met the larger portion of the cave. Avoiding her glare, he stared out the entrance with a pensiveness that reminded Rey of Leia and Rey couldn’t help but wonder what he was looking at in his perspective.

After a moment’s silence, she added, “So how do we end this?”

He heaved a sigh, his gaze falling down to his feet. Rey tried not to notice the way one of his obsidian locks fell over his face. “I don’t know.” The words sounded foreign and almost disturbing coming from him, but Rey hid her discomfort behind knit brows and a tight scowl.

“You don’t know? You’re the Supreme Leader, aren’t you supposed to know about these things? Or were Force Bonds not covered in the murderer handbook?”

“Not one like this.” There was an edge to his voice now that he was growing more and more impatient, but she wasn’t fazed.

“Fine then, I’ll figure out a way to get rid of it since you won’t, you coward.” She let the insult roll off her tongue and watched as it washed over him.

It was as if she had finally pulled the right trigger because all of Kylo’s anger came bubbling up to the surface as he turned to face her. “You don’t think I want to?” He took a step closer and Rey felt herself backing up against the head of her bed as he neared her. Suddenly, reaching for her blaster seemed like a good idea. “I’ve spent the past three weeks trying to sever you from my mind, but each time I do—” He stops, as if trying to put his thoughts into words. “It feels like I’m tearing my own brain apart.”

That explained the headaches. “So that was you. I felt it too.” A chill ran down Rey’s spine as she came to the ugly conclusion, the one neither wanted to acknowledge. “Does that mean...”

The frustration in his eyes turned into an acceptance as his expression hardened. “That’s the only way it ends.”

A month ago, Rey wouldn’t have thought twice about killing Kylo Ren. Hell, she even had a fair try at it, the jagged scar across his face serving as a constant reminder of his close defeat. But after they had touched hands on Ahch To, things were...different. Somehow, the thought of him dead now made her stomach churn and her eyes burn, and yet she couldn’t figure out why.

“Well, it doesn’t have to be. Not if…if...” she trailed off.

“If what?” he challenged.

“You know what.”

“Say it, Rey.” She shivered at her name, spoken like a curse. “I want you to say it.”

It would be so easy to continue fighting him, but she didn’t see the point. Reluctantly, she said what he wanted to hear. “If you turned. Joined the Resistance.” Joined me. “Why didn’t you?”

This was the first time she had really asked him sincerely, the question that had been plaguing her mind. He turned away from her again, and for a second, Rey didn’t think he was going to respond, but his low voice broke the silence. “The same reason why you didn’t accept my offer.” He squared his shoulders, back still to her, and though his mask was nowhere to be seen, Rey felt as if he had just put it back on. “We are who we are. What’s the use in fighting it if it’s what we’re destined to be?”

She let the question fall from her lips before she could stop herself. “What do you think we’re destined to be?”

The connection cut out before she could get an answer.

[fangirling97]

TROS SPOILERS

I just want to know WHO? Who made the decisions for this movie. Was it J.J.? Chris Terrio? Kathleen Kennedy? Bob Iger? Who had the power here and who decided to take the most hopeful, beautiful story arc in the history of redemption arcs and end it with a very unsatisfying and disrespectful death?

It truly never seriously crossed my mind that Ben Solo would die in this film. I had faith in the creators to know that it would be the worst idea ever. Clearly I was wrong.

I’ve been doing my utmost to seek positivity. The fact is this movie has some of my favorite moments in the history of Star Wars. I genuinely fall in love with Ben Solo and the brilliant mannerisms and attitude he exudes every time I think about him. I thought I loved Kylo Ren...it’s nothing compared to Ben Solo.

The kiss is beautiful. Their faces kill me every time. I’ve never seen such pure joy and love like that.

The scene with Han and Ben genuinely makes me tear up every time I think about it and I full-on sobbed in the theater when I saw it. It’s everything I didn’t know I needed from this relationship and it only cements my love for these two characters deeper in my heart.

So much of this movie is even better than how I saw it in my head...so why do I feel physically ill when I think about it?

Ultimately I could forgive a whole lot. I can forgive the messy pacing. The lack of meaningful dialogue and the fact that we still have no idea how Palpatine is alive and that no one seems as concerned as they really should be...seriously, why is NO ONE like deeply shocked and concerned??

What I can’t forgive is the lack of respect to the characters and the previous movies.

Rey Palpatine: (I’ll get to Ben Solo, believe me) I remember hearing this theory ages ago and thinking well that’s never going to happen. Don’t I feel stupid? Well....no I don’t, cause really it never should have. Everyone has said it and I whole-heartedly agree that Rey Nobody is what we needed for this trilogy. Frankly, it makes me like her more that way. This story could have gone exactly the same way without her being related to the grossest and most evil man in the galaxy (please go listen to What the Force-Dark Union). There is literally no reason to make these characters related at all except to give Rey a family she has NO connection to at all. I’ve loved the way that each main character (Rey, Kylo/Ben, and Finn) have had to grapple with their personal histories and find a way to accept and move past them in this trilogy. Yet Rey doesn’t...at all. We are repeatedly told throughout this movie that you make your own family and that it doesn’t matter where you come from you are your own person...so WHY relate her (clumsily and without ANY foreshadowing or reasoning at all) to a truly despicable being that has no real effect on the person she is. It’s not unbelievable that every person has a fight between light and dark inside. They don’t have to be related to a villain to make sure we all get that.

Finn: I really don’t understand this character at all in this movie. Firstly, is there even an arc. I’ve seen it twice now and I really can’t see one. The only semi-interesting aspect is that he’s force-sensitive which I didn’t really want. Not because I don’t like Finn but he’s already an interesting and dynamic character without it. Finn being Force sensitive does not make him better in any meaningful way. If that’s really the direction you wanted to take him in then it should have at least been hinted at in TFA. And really? Really? We had to have the weird little secret through the whole movie? I honestly didn’t even notice that his force sensitivity may have been the thing he wanted to tell Rey through the movie (mostly because the movie is too busy for this tiny little piece). I don’t understand where the weird tension between Finn and Poe cane from and while I don’t mind the idea it felt like it came and went way too quickly and all the sudden it’s all grand cause the end battle is coming? And everyone has said it but I agree, I really think Rose made Finn a better character and apparently she’s just gone in this movie with NO addressing of their chemistry and romantic plot in TLJ...at all. It’s just weird and uncomfortable.

Luke: I have never been the biggest Luke fan but I was genuinely excited to see him in this movie. Though the Han scene is spectacular, I really wanted a little more from Luke and Ben. I really wanted Luke’s words in the first trailer to be to both Rey and Ben if not just to Ben himself. It felt important to have Ben face his uncle once again and be able to forgive (somewhat) and move on from that pain and betrayal. Instead, all Luke was used for was to call out Rian Johnson and deliver some very strange exposition that tbh I don’t even remember. The fact that our beloved hero’s scene in the final Skywalker movie is utterly unremarkable is a shame and I have to keep reminding myself it’s even in the movie. It doesn’t make sense for Luke and Leia to know Rey’s lineage and literally never say a word. Luke nearly killed Ben Solo for having darkness inside of him but Rey is the descendent of the most evil man in the galaxy (and a personal tormenter of the Skywalker family) and he just is totally cool with it...no.

Ben: This is really what hurts the most. I could forgive a lot (even Rey Palpatine though it will always be stupid) if Ben Solo had been able to live. The truth is I was enjoying the movie for the whole time until the moment when my favorite character of all time, the epitome of all that is Star Wars to me, died. Without any moment to mourn him. Stepping back, I can see the tragic beauty in this moment. He sacrificed himself to save the light and love of his life. And he’s happy to do it. He knows he can’t live without her. The problem is, Ben Solo has faced his tragedy already. Isn’t that the point? Isn’t that why he’s humanized so early in TFA. I have always loved Vader’s story and I do believe it was the right move to have him sacrifice himself for his son. But Vader was a monster and nothing more until the end of the RotJ. Kylo is nearly immediately humanized in making him the son of Leia and Han. In showing his face to the scavenger girl so quickly. Then pretty much the entirety of TLJ. It’s all showing his humanity. We should have all known (and many did) that redemption and the pull to the light is inevitable for Kylo Ren. Kylo Ren was never going to make it out of this trilogy but I sure believed Ben Solo would. I am in awe with the performance of Adam Driver in the third act of this movie (well actually all of it, but you know what I mean). Ben is completely different from Kylo Ren in almost every aspect. So many people have complained that Ben never actually has dialogue outside of the very endearing “ow”. I’ll be honest it makes me so sad and I definitely wanted to see some from him but I didn’t actually notice the lack of words the first time because of how much Adam is able to convey with every movement and facial expression. I knew exactly who this character was and I have never loved a character so much in my life. In these moments you can see every pain, betrayal, and weight is lifted from him. Ben is finally free of his pain. And now he can be the man he was always meant to be and it is staggeringly beautiful. And then he is thrown into a pit. Not allowed to fight the being that has tortured his family for the entirety of the saga. And is killed without a moment to grieve for us or for the love of his life. And I can’t get over it. I can’t see the logic in it. What’s the point? What’s the message here? Life sucks and then you die? THATS NOT STAR WARS!!!! Star Wars has always been tragic but there is always hope! Look at RotS. That is the saddest movie in Star Wars (till now) and it ends with the twins carrying the hope of the galaxy and their mother. Uncle Lars and Aunt Beru look into the sunset with hope as Obi Wan looks on knowing that if anyone can save the galaxy it’s going to be Luke Skywalker. Even if Obi Wan doesn’t believe that Anakin can be saved Luke is still worth everything to keep safe. In ESB Han Solo is frozen in carbonate, Luke is the son of the monstrous Vader, and the Empire is winning. Yet in the end Luke and Leia stand side-by-side, determined to make it all better. There is always hope in Star Wars yet I am left utterly hopeless by this movie. The only thing keeping me afloat is the idea that Ben Solo May live on due to the fact that we don’t see him at all in the end of HIS FAMILYS SAGA! (More on that in a moment). For the last four years Kylo Ren/Ben Solo has represented potential and hope. And now he’s dead. I can’t get over that. I hope Lucasfilm and Disney understand what he means to us and finds a way to bring him back. I don’t know what Adam Diver believed he was going to be completing but I can’t imagine this was the way it was supposed to be. Not when he loves this character as much as we do.

The Skywalkers: this is mostly a continuation but I had some specific things I wanted to address here. This is the Skywalker saga. I can say without a doubt this is my favorite fictional family ever. I love the drama and the angst and the importance they hold. I have never doubted that the sequel trilogy would hold up to that because Ben Solo (Skywalker) existed. Yet they are completely sidelined in this movie. I love Rey so so much but to introduce the idea of a Force Dyad with ultimate power in the Force and the to throw the Skywalker half off a cliff so that the two Palpatines can duke it out for the fate of the Skywalker Saga is just awful. I truly believe that Ben should have killed Palpatine (to stop Rey from being possessed by her creepy grandpa) and to be able to complete Anakins story. We even learn that Palpatine has haunted Ben in the same way he’s haunted Anakin (which is totally glossed over by the way, cause why is that important, right?) and yet Ben does nothing against Palpatine in the final fight. How does this make sense? I said all along I wanted an Anakin cameo in this movie and I was truly happy to hear Hayden’s voice in this movie but if Ben and Rey are dyads and representations of balance in the Force then why is she the Jedi that needs to rise? Shouldn’t they BOTH be that? The fact that this movie ends with no living Skywalkers is just bad and it hurts. I cannot understand the need for the Skywalker line to end just cause the saga is ending. Let Ben Solo and Rey have babies for goodness sake! And to be honest I don’t feel any emotion except disappointment and frustration at the whole Rey Skywalker line. She’s not a Skywalker, or if she is then she shouldn’t be alone. Loneliness has never been good in Star Wars. And yeah Luke and Leia show up as Force ghosts but that’s not real companionship and neither is BB-8. Rey is not meant to be alone and neither is Ben. Or do the most touching lines in TLJ mean absolutely nothing at this point. Now I can only hold on to Luke’s line, “no one is ever really gone.”

This ended up way longer than I meant it to but turns out I needed to get some of my feelings out. I’m frustrated at my inability to feel satisfied by all of the truly wonderful moments in this movie (Reylo is real and Ben is here once again). There are so many other things I thought too. Why does Rey decide to go into exile on Ach-To when she spent the whole last movie explaining why it doesn’t work to Luke? (Well it’s cause obviously TLJ isn’t important, that’s why everything was retconned,right? Except JJ said he didn’t do that...weird.) Why is it that Rey showed the Resistance how to get to Exegol when I personally think it would have been cooler and more meaningful to have the signal coming from a rogue tie fighter flown by Ben Solo? (Think about it. Han tells Ben to help the thing his mother lived for, the Resistance, he knows how to get there and it would have been a far more interesting moment then just having Finn tell us all what Rey means when we kinda figured it out for ourselves, thanks). Why didn’t Ben fly the Falcon at all in total acceptance of his true identity?

But ultimately these are the most important things I felt coming out of TROS. I fully expected this movie to be my favorite of the trilogy if not my favorite of them all. I’ve always like the Star Wars finales the most. RotS is my favorite of all of the SW movies with RotJ close behind. Really though, this isn’t a Star Wars finale it’s just dressed up as one. I hope there will be more things to come and I look forward to the future of Star Wars (with binary sunsets in the middle distance, of course). And I hope this isn’t really the end of Ben Solo, my hero.

Now to catch up on Clone Wars because Star Wars is where I go when I’m feeling down. Even if I’m feeling down about Star Wars.

[darkestshadeofgrey]

ELIAS

He avoids the mess with the First Order and its resistance-the conflict feels far too familiar for his liking-but Palpatine announcing his return is the first thing to tempt him to involve himself for more years than he cares to count. Nearly just as soon as he begins to contemplate this choice, however, someone else makes it for him. For the second time in his life he feels the Dark Lord of the Sith fall, and this time he takes the First Order with him. Once again, Elias finds his concern turn to curiosity, as the figure who bested Palpatine piques his interest.

It takes time to catch up-this one is constantly on the move it seems-but he finally manages to catch up to the famed hero of the resistance on, of all places, Coruscant. As he nears the long abandoned temple where he can sense her presence within, he takes a breath and thinks back on times long since passed. There’s a pain and a joy to those memories, but he casts both aside to focus on what he’s come for.

When he finds her, rummaging through what’s left of the archives, he’s astonished to find she’s little more than a child. He nearly lets disbelief see him turn around, but he then senses her grief, and also her resolve, prompting him to at least see this through.

“These halls have gone undisturbed for a very, very long time, youngling. Why have you chosen to see that streak broken now?”

REY

she is supposed to be alone here.

the force signature that seems to barge into the holy space rey has been rooting around in for the past day cycle makes no secret of its entrance. this, more than anything, jarrs rey into dropping the metal cylinder currently in her hand. inwardly cursing the state of her nerves, she manages to stop its descent with the force, but not before it hits several other items on the way down. lips purse so hard they turn white, but slowly she pivots in the direction of the insistent signature at her back. no avoiding it now.

every muscle and tendon is ready to spring as she fully faces the doorway where stands the shadow. from many feet away his eyes are starkly visible, and their brightness clashes with the darkness of his clothing. these are eyes she’s seen before, in someone else. in a dream. it stirs a little fear in the pit of her stomach and it fights her already wound up thoughts for dominance.

but, another skim of the force sets some of her tension at ease. there’s curiosity hovering between her and the stranger more than anything else. so she flexes her fingers and stares straight on. youngling. he’ll soon see she left the youngling she once was far behind her.

        “what do you want?”

ELIAS

The tension his voice brings her as it echoes through the hallowed hall is unsurprising, and though he makes no move towards his own weapons he is more than ready to defend himself if need be-he certainly looks the part of her enemy even if has yet to decide to count himself among them. There's a relief, though, and even a pleasant surprise at her reaponse, making him glad to see some defiance and curiosity cut through the fear and uncertainty that he can feel from her. He grins, and though the expression is hidden by his mask there is a mirth in his voice as he replies.

"Not much of one for answering questions, eh? Good. That will serve you well these days. You'd have fit right in with this lot as well, truth be told; they weren't fond of answering anything either."

He inadvertently lets some of his disdain slip through in those last words, lingering disappointment with the old order momentarily souring his mood. Cautious steps are then taken towards her, a finger idly dragging across tables on the way and leaving a trail in the dust.

"Thankfully for you, I am more willing to be forthcoming, whenit suits me. Consider me a.... interested observer. I do hope you didn't think thwarting the Dark Lord of the Sith would garner you no attention, because if so allow me to be the first to inform you that you were very sorely mistaken."

REY

a snarl begins to form upon hearing his derision, an automatic response still left over from her early days admiring those of the jedi order, but it abates when she hears truth woven in the retort. he isn’t wrong. her own question was partially borne out of the vague and wispy talk she’d heard so much of from luke, kylo, and even leia at times. it’s enough to mentally kick herself for absorbing what she’d hated so much about the way they’d spoken to her. from old dreams, she remembers snatches of anakin’s rage and frustration at the very same empty things he was told. it mirrored her own disillusionment at the time and frightened her deeply. now she understands where he who was to become darth vader was coming from – and yet knows the hopeful end to his story, though it came just barely before death caught up to him. she can’t forget how darth vader ended. but there was so much to dislike about the way things had been done until only recently, and she feels the pricks of that old darkness again. the stranger has hit upon it well. apparently it’s been passed down.

      “you knew some of them, then?” this could mean one of many things, but rey doesn’t want to waste time calculating odds when she could have her answers much sooner. since this intruder is so talkative, might as well take advantage. but first…

       “i didn’t do it to be noticed,” rey snaps quietly. the edges of the room blur, she remembers ashes falling. stones cracking. “someone had to do something and i was there. why does it matter who i am?”

ELIAS

She asked if he knew the Jedi of old, and while he’s certain her question is borne of simple and genuine inquisitiveness-he does speak with a certain familiarity and authority after all-the asking still manages to strike an all too sensitive nerve. He clenches his fist and the ground beneath their feet begins to quake. There’s a rather hasty build and it feels as though the entire temple rumbles as the rage and anguish that still constantly simmer just below the surface of him even after all these years bubbles over as thoughts of simpler, more peaceful times come to mind only to be quickly shattered by the memory of the one who brought them all to an end. The one man who tore down everything he knew and loved. Yes, the Jedi order was flawed, and broken, and a mere shell of what it was meant to be, but so long as it stood there was always the chance, the hope of changing for the better. Darth Vader stole that chance, dashed that hope, and brought all to ruin and ash. Anakin, his “brother”; oh how he hated him. And, as if betraying their order was not plenty reason enough to loathe him with every fiber of his being, Elias still remembered every agonizing second of how he was picked apart, chopped, and shredded under Vader’s methodical, almost clinically dispassionate hands. Vader destroyed everything he was and reshaped him into a plaything, a puppet, a weapon; a sharp edge to cut down those they both once called family. Vader twisted and warped Elias into everything they both once fought against, and for that, even in death, even in returning to the light at the end, would never receive forgiveness.

There is a strained pause of several seconds before he finds his voice again.

“…Yes, I knew them well.”

These words, spoken tersely through teeth clenched so tight they might seem near to cracking, are all he utters. He offers no further clarification of his proximity to the figures of legend, but, if her senses are up to snuff, he is sure she feels everything that he leaves unsaid. It takes several seconds for him to finally calm himself enough to not lash out at her. She is, after all, a child, who knows not of what she speaks. It helps to distract him when she mentions not understanding what it matters who she is, and he even lets out a humorless laugh.

“It matters more than anything, because who you are decides what comes next. You are the future of this galaxy, whether you want to be or not. Everything you do now affects what happens, because, by your actions, you have made yourself into such figurehead. The worlds all look up to you now as the hero who saved them from the tyranny of the dark side; the fabled Jedi of old resurgent. Because of this, whatever you choose to do or whoever you choose to be will set the tide and tone for all that is to come. You may not want attention nor think it matters who you are, little one, but it matters more than anything has in a looong time. That is why I wanted to see you. That is why you have my attention, because I want to see where we go from her. I myself tend to avoid the constant conflict of our galaxy, but even I recognize the significance of this; even I recognize what is important. And you are what’s important now. I have to say, I already like what I see. You have a fire to you that has been sorely needed for some time, and I look forward to seeing how you shake things up.”

REY

a wave of energy explodes across the room, emanating from the clenched fist of this masked man. taking care not to resist it, the wave flows through her. the impression she’s left with in the aftermath is strange: this outburst of anger is not so much directed at her but results more from unpleasant memories. all the same, rey can’t help but reach for her saberstaff. looking around, she sees tapestries on the walls tremble to the point that several slide down to the floor. relics she’d piled behind her topple and some break or clatter on the floor. she’d be far more irritated at the resulting destruction if she weren’t so simultaneously curious and a little frightened by this display.

whoever this man is, he has great power - or he has seen great power and not come away unscathed.

when the air in the room becomes still once more, the man speaks again, sounding wrecked. it’s almost as if the ghostly memory of a black masked, cloaked figure stands between them. taunting. this stranger knew anakin skywalker. this man knew darth vader.

unfortunately rey cannot dwell on this fascinating (or alarming) tidbit for very long before he moves on, and fast. the air around her shakes with conviction this time around, and the words that follow are such a blur of warnings and grudges and compliments that rey finds herself quite upended, unclear where to begin in response. faintly, the echoes of something she said to luke on ach-to float back to her. “kylo failed you. i won’t.” what promises rey makes she keeps to the best of her ability, but what she’s hearing opens her mind to the wideness of what she’s done. training, or trying, to become proficient enough to snuff out a lingering darkness in the galaxy was one thing. being tasked with ushering in a new age is another altogether. nobody told her to be ready for this.

        “i…..don’t know if i’m the person you think i am.” mouth hung halfway open, rey studies the dust motes drifting around her and thinks. “the jedi order is gone. i couldn’t resurrect it alone if i tried, and…..i don’t know that i should.”

ELIAS

There’s a strange comfort that comes from the way she is no repulsed nor even tries to shun or dismiss to fear his little outburst makes her feel. It’s a step in the right direction, and one he wishes the council had taken while it had the chance. He feels her fear shift back to curiosity and uncertainty, and as she continues to speak he can’t help but to smile once again.

“Well, you’re already a lot smarter than the last kid in your shoes. You actually bothered to stop and ask yourself questions like that, and it makes you exactly the kind of person I was hoping you’d be. It means that, even if you don’t always make the right choices, you’re thinking before you make them.”

He takes a moment to finally do away with some of the mystery, deciding to get somewhat comfortable with her. He peels back his hood and removes his mask, allowing his face to be in full view.

“I am Elias Kanu. No one of any import, really. Just a relic of a man who has seen much in his time. As for you, your importance is an unfortunate side effect of your actions. I know that your sudden significance is a lot for you to process, and its ramifications will not be apparent all at once, but I am certain no one else you know has the perspective to even make you aware of it, and I’d rather you not go in as blindly as your predecessor.”

REY

before she can help it, her nose crinkles at his use of the word “kid”, nearly leaving behind his compliments altogether. logically she knows that, once upon a time, luke skywalker could have been called that. it’s just that the almost stony and sad old man she met seemed to never have been young a day in his life. of all things though, this is probably not what she needs to get stuck on.

thankfully, elias removing his mask provides a necessary reset. what is it with men dressed like darkness itself introducing themselves to her by removing their masks? at least this man hadn’t let his reputation precede him.

    “elias.” rey nods sharply in greeting, loosening her white knuckled grip on the saberstaff. if need be she can still strike at any point. “thank you. for your advice and your warning. but what makes you so sure? people have been more than happy to tell me many things - about myself and the jedi - but not all of them have been true. or what i needed.”

ELIAS

He senses her incredulousness and indignance, and despite himself finds his lips curving slightly into a small smile. It reminded him of his own youth, to a point.

“You might say I have a…unique perspective on these matters. I’m not here to tell you anything about yourself, and anything I say about the Jedi will be more cautionary than the the lauding you’re likely used to, but I thought you ought to know what you represent now. I have my hopes and suppositions, of course, but neither I nor anyone else can dictate what you want or what you need or who you are or who you’re going to be. I just came to tell you that, whether you like it or not, everyone will now be watching to find out.”

REY

        “good.” another nod, stiff but more pronounced, accompanies the word. there’s so much mystery wrapped up in what he says and very little of what he’s hinting at sounds strictly positive, but rey can feel the slow approach of truth. this is what she’d wanted - from everyone. not platitudes about her abilities, though she has far more faith in them now than she ever has before, and for good reason. definitely not what her path forward must look like or else she will be as good as dead to the jedi order. this man knows things, and rey knows immediately that these are treasures she wants to rifle through and keep for herself. nearly gone are her thoughts on the trinkets piled behind her. there’s so much more to be discovered elsewhere. she can feel an old familiar itch in her fingers that promises something of value up ahead.

         “you said it yourself: i’ve been told many good things about the jedi. bad things, too. i know they became something other than what they were meant to be. i know luke skywalker had regrets, and so did the people who trained him. but i was never told the whole story. so what do you know?”

ELIAS

“More than most.” The response shoots out nearly before he can think on it, a certain sudden curtness to his tone that jars even him; if only because he marvels at how raw such old wounds still manage to be. He takes a moment to try and set that all aside, body relaxing as he lets out a slow exhale. He can already tell this is the first of a million questions the girl will have now that he’s established himself as an authority, and he can’t treat each one like a slap in the face.

“There is much about the twilight of the Jedi you won’t find in a history book. Most accounts either paint them as near mythical warriors of justice who swept through the galaxy and combated evil at every turn, while others say they are power hungry zealots who betrayed their closest allies and thus were vanquished for the sake of peace.

Peace, bah.” He has to scoff, shaking his head and thinking back.

“The Jedi saw themselves as peacekeepers. Conflict generally was frowned upon, though being able to defend yourself was a paramount skill to be learned. Towards the end, things had gotten pretty cushy for them. They’d aligned themselves with the Galactic Republic, the seats of power for both factions being on the same planet not too far from each other.”

He stops to look around the place, an amused smirk on his face as something occurs to him.

“ It’s funny to think about this temple, a supposed holy place for meditation and education to be located in a city that spans the entire rest of the planet, one that includes the center of galactic politics and the worst and most crime-ridden slums in the galaxy. Such a strange contradiction, this place’s very existence. Anyway, the order in its last days was a far cry from any legendary status they’ve gained nowadays. They were….people, really. People who adhered to a strict code. One made in, I’d like to think, an ideal time for an ideal situation. It put them in a bubble; one they never imagined would pop until it did. Then, the Clone Wars happened. It wasn’t even their war, not really, but as peacekeepers and allies to the Republic, they felt they had a duty to intervene. Keeping the peace meant waging war. That is how holy men became generals. How masters became murderers. It became a murky time, and the Jedi way wasn’t built for murkiness. It made them unable to fathom the war was anything but what it presented itself as, and by the time they saw anything more to it, it was too late to stop what was in motion. They ‘ended’ the war, but the Republic, now the Empire, took all the credit. A Sith Lord sat at the highest seat of power and systematically dismantled his greatest allies and his greatest competition: the Jedi. The council didn’t see it coming at all, so caught up in their own self-importance and chasing their own tails to see the threat right beside them. A lot of good people….people who had just been doing the best they could, were lost in the Purge….and only the lucky ones of those were killed. In the aftermath, both the Empire and those who remembered the Jedi were able to spin their own stories…their legends. Who would tell either side where they were wrong?

And so, here we are; nearly a century later with a mix match of stories told by scores of people who weren’t there and don’t know but are all absolutely convinced of the ‘truth’ of their accounts. Does that satisfy you as the ‘whole story’, youngling?”

REY

all focus is drawn to the sounds of history being spilled at her feet like poison spit from a snarling mouth. the only wise thing to do is listen, to soak up each detail like she is a sponge that will never fill. this knowledge cost something. many things, if she senses correctly. perhaps even shards of a soul. but it keeps spilling….and spilling and spilling. quite unknowingly, she’s broken open a geyser that has been stopped up for too long – and it’s raging.

while elias speaks, she can recalls that the brief time she spent on ach-to with luke opened her eyes wide to the fragility of what used to be the jedi order. while it might have once been a paragon of peace and justice - or actually accomplished anything noteworthy - enough pressure seemed to crumble it. even while luke valiantly tried to resurrect the soul of what the jedi used to be on crait with his last gasp, he couldn’t erase the truth that elias seems to be indicating as well: the jedi had lied to themselves for longer than they wanted to admit.  or worse, they’d convinced themselves over time that their code and their teachings were the only way, were the only truth. by the time the galaxy needed them most, they’d self-brainwashed themselves into blindness. blindness that left more than just peace in its wake, but lives as well.

through it all, rey feels the rate of her heartbeat ratcheting up and up while the tale spins darker and darker. she can feel the bitterness and judgment in the air coat the stones at her feet and climb up the walls, tingeing the air around the two force wielders a sickly gray. it’s as through elias’s very emotions are living beings, invisible to the naked eye but crowding the lonely room in a defunct temple so tightly it’s hard to breathe. rey waits long moments after elias finishes so she can wrestle back control over her heart and lungs. there are so many thoughts (chiefly that she will NOT be representing such a failed code) and questions to ask about what not to repeat and what to do differently, but before that…

“you were there, then. if the people that can only recount legends were never there, and you have the whole story, then you were in the middle of it. you knew them, and you saw what happened.” the fact that his force signature betrayed personal knowledge of anakin skywalker and darth vader is still vital, but that particular jedi turned sith was not the only player in the downfall of order in the galaxy. “and if that is the whole true story,” it is; she can feel it in the threads of the force that twist and warp around her, “then i will not represent something that failed so miserably!”

ELIAS

In the pause between his speech ending and her declarations beginning, Elias manages to center himself Picking at these old scabs is taxing-though necessary- so he takes whatever reprieve is afforded to him. It’s fortunate, then, that her final summation pulls forth hearty laugh out of him loud and genuine it nearly catches him off guard. “HAHA, that’s the spirit girl! Oh…you are, such a refreshing change of pace. I’m so used to these people and their…blind devotion, or baseless revulsion. You manage to recognize that the Jedi meant to do something right and were just shit at it. But you’re right: I was there. More than that, I was a one of them. I watched from the inside as the Order was destroyed, watched people I loved die in droves, and I watched and felt what the Empire built over their corpses. So I know, from experience, what a Jedi is meant to be, what the Order turned into, and -most importantly- what it could be. I see the latter in you, youngling. I see a chance to take the example of the best intentions of the Jedi, but the flexibility and wisdom to look beyond their rigid and unyielding code. When this conversation began I told you that you will be the example for what comes next, and I am now convinced you’re primed to set a good one. And to that end, I will do something I haven’t done in….a very long time: I offer my aid. You have many questions, I’m sure, and I will answer them all to the best of my ability.” 

REY

nothing so far has caused her more unease than this man’s laughter. it grates the air, making her grit her teeth in reaction. though his response isn’t strictly…..unpleasant, it’s the surprise of it that has her on edge. is he making fun of her? is he pleased? she has to hone her focus to him and anything he says to glean anything at all.

one of them. it was easy to put the pieces together before, but this admission makes everything quite real, stand in stark definition. how she takes comfort is realizing what it cost him to be part of the empire and the damage that was wrought upon his mindset. elias hasn’t recovered, may never recover, from what he has seen. this knowledge as good as any promise he could make to her that he doesn’t wish to cause her harm or derail her purpose.

      “you would?” this is an olive branch and compliment, she’s sure, but rey has never been good at properly responding to either of those. nevertheless, her spirits lift before she can stop them. maybe there’s no need to. “i do have many questions, and i need a teacher. though i’ve been offered help before and it’s done more harm than good. forgive me if i still have my doubts.” but she’s testing him. all of her wants to find out if he is as trustworthy as he postures himself to be. “if we are to do this….” slowly, she allows a half smile to surface. “you cannot call me youngling. no matter how old you are.”

ELIAS

Her excitement proves contagious, and he finds himself bizarrely eager to begin her instruction. He’s never had a student before-and in many ways still thinks of himself as one-but the prospect of sharing the trove of knowledge stored in his mind is suddenly quite alluring. He’s never even considered it before, and it amuses him to have so serendipitously stumbled upon such a fitting recipient.

He nods thoughtfully as she expresses her lingering doubts, understanding them completely. They have, after all, only just met and to expect implicit trust would be foolish. Her desire for her youth not to be so regularly pointed out, however, draws an exaggerated sigh and a rolls of his eyes.

“Very well. I suppose that takes ‘kid’ off the table as well then, eh? So what shall it be, then? Your reputation may precede you, but it unfortunately seems to have failed to include your name. As for your doubts, however, hold onto them. The last thing I would ever want is to silence that voice in your head that defies convention and seeks certainty. I aim to earn your trust, and, truth be told, I’d be horribly disappointed if you gave it away so carelessly.”

[baronfulmen]

Untangling Palpatine

Today's exercise is trying to figure out what Palpatine was doing between Episode 6 and Episode 9, and whether or not there's some way the shit we see can make sense.

We start our plot reconstruction at the end of Episode 6, when Vader throws Palpatine down random Death Star shaft #45,641.  There's that burst of energy that appears to be Palpatine being disintegrated, but clearly that's not the case so let's say his force lightning just caused some component on the wall of the shaft to explode.

So Palpatine hits the bottom, fall softened somewhat by a force push but not so much that he's unharmed.  He breaks a lot of bones, plus he once again lightninged himself which seems to be a problem he's got.  Some maintenance worker sees him and flips, calls some other guys in and they get him to safety.  Right at this point the whole place is about to blow, but they get him to an escape pod or something.

So he's alive, and the movie is over.  Anakin has not really brought balance to the force, so I guess that prophesy is a bust - but then I don't know it was confirmed to be specifically about him anyway.  Maybe that was about Kylo or Rey or something.  The Empire doesn't cease to exist right away, but it's not doing great.  It could use some leadership.  Leadership like, say, the Emperor.  But no, he for some reason would rather let the empire fracture and fall into chaos - maybe that was a little too close for comfort, and he wants to lay low until the heat dies down some.

But he can't completely let things go, so he pulls out the old clone vats and makes some pseudo-emperors.  Because that was always a thing he could do, I guess.  He names one Snoke, and one Sloke, and one Skoke, and one Billy just to mix things up.  He sends them to each part of the splintering empire and most of them get killed and that's fine.  He salvages a few areas, and the biggest group turns into the First Order.  And he uses the force to control Snoke - it's not clear how sentient Snoke is when the Emperor isn't pulling his strings, but let's say he's mostly a figurehead and has very little intelligence or initiative of his own.

But meanwhile this body is getting pretty ragged, and his kid (that we've never heard of) has run off and married some girl and knocked her up.  Okay, well that's fine, maybe the kid will be force sensitive or something and he can use that.  It's... not clear why this needs to happen.  His own son is not a person of any interest, presumably the force skipped a generation.  There are other force sensitives out there, does blood relation matter so much?  If it does, is there a reason he can't use a clone?  Also, can he just have more kids himself?

Even if the force lightning has rendered him sterile, wouldn't he want to kidnap his living son and use him as a breeder?  But no, even though for some vague (possibly religious) reasons he wants to use a relative he decides he doesn't care about his kid.  He has the entire might of the first order plus a few million other remaining Empire soldiers at his disposal but he wants this mission to have the personal touch so he sends just one guy to go get his son, his daughter in law, and his granddaughter.

He could give the guy his coordinates - he already has a whole fleet of ships flying to and from the "secret" Sith planet day and night working on production of the planet-killing Star Destroyers, plus all the support personnel, etc. but instead he wants this guy to use one of the two Sith Wayfinders.  One is somewhere in a forest in a box for some reason, the movie never explains that, but the other was right by his throne room in the second Death Star.

So Palpatine force-projects over there, floats around as a ghost, confirms that the throne room survived surprisingly intact and the wayfinder is sitting there in his secret closet.  Cool.  He floats over to the coast, picks a spot at random, memorizes the shape of the wreckage from there, and then commissions a knife.  Why?  Style, that's why.  He writes some coordinates on there - in Sith, obviously - although he doesn't make the coordinates very specific so it's down to luck if the guy will stand at the correct part of the coast for the shape of the blade to line up.

Then he sends the knife to the guy, so the guy can use it to get to the wayfinder and use the wayfinder to get to the planet where the millions of Empire people already live while they build the mega-fleet.  Not overcomplicated at all.

The guy goes, grabs the Emperor's son and daughter in law, ignores the child chasing after them yelling "mamma, don't go!" because surely that's irrelevant, and then briefly and ineffectually questions them before stabbing them to death with the map-knife.  He could go back and look around for the child but it's been a long day and he doesn't want to. Instead, he goes to some other random planet, parks in the middle of the desert, falls into a patch of beads that somehow drops him into a tunnel without letting the beads through, and then he gets eaten by a snake.

Palpatine knows the guy has never returned, but he doesn't send anyone else to check out Jakku or go get the wayfinder or anything.  It's fine.  Everything is fine.  He didn't care that much anyway, and he's already decided that he would rather manipulate Han and Leia's kid who is almost old enough to start training.  Thankfully, despite being surrounded by powerful force sensitive people who love him nobody notices Palpatine reaching across space to mess with the kid.  He does this as Snoke, and sometimes as Vader just for giggles.  Anakin's force ghost thankfully never appears to the kid, that would have fucked up everything.

Eventually he gets Ben to do the privileged white teenager thing and shoot up his school, and brings him into the First Order.  Thankfully, Luke responds by retiring and not fighting the remains of the empire in any way or making any effort to clean up his mess.  This opens the way to really ramp up the First Order, which the opening crawl of Episode 7 implies has just become serious AFTER Luke took off even though with the scope and power they have that's not really possible.  Whatever, we'll say this is the time they start gaining back the ground that was lost in some areas.

So we're at the start of the first of the new movies, Episode 7.  Even though by now Palpatine must already have the Star-Destroyer sized Death Star guns designed, he still has the First Order build the Starkiller Base which is maybe not the best use of resources.  But it works, and in one shot blows up all the goodguys apparently.  Just like that, as the next movie makes clear, the First Order is the main power in the galaxy and the new republic is back to being a tiny group of plucky rebels.

All that's left is the cleanup, but Palpatine doesn't reveal himself or his millions of troops and gigantic fleet of Star Destroyers that must be at least partly completed by now.  He's still holding out for some perfect moment.  Then the Starkiller base gets blown to hell, and there's someone that seems to be a new Jedi.  He orders her killed - does he know this is his granddaughter?  Unclear.  Certainly he keeps ordering her killed after he knows, but it's possible he doesn't find out who she is until... I don't know, until she's close to his Snoke Puppet.

Either way, he tries to get Kylo to kill her.  Luke shows back up, then dies which is what the First Order wanted anyway.  The rebel forces are down to like twelve people, although between episodes 8 and 9 their numbers somehow swell a bit.  It doesn't matter, things are great and it's all over but the party planning.  The fleet of planet-killing Star Destroyers are done, but he buries them underground so that he can have a cool dramatic reveal.  Snoke is dead, and Kylo wants to take over the First Order, but he figures that's easy enough to deal with.

How?  Why, by sending a voicemail to the galaxy as a whole yelling at them.  It's... a roundabout way of doing things to be sure.  He could have just appeared to Kylo, or sent in a Snoke clone (Spoke is almost ready, just needs to be pulled from the vat), or sent the voicemail just to the First Order, or a million other things.  But nah, he tells everyone he's alive at once and then waits for Kylo to hunt him down.  Then he tells Kylo he's Snoke and pretended to be Vader and whatever else, and he dramatically raises all the star destroyers from the ground, but he doesn't deploy them.

The First Order is cool with all this.  It's probably strange for them to find out he was somehow secretly Snoke or in charge of Snoke or whatever, but fine.  And they probably wonder why he didn't bring in the enormous fleet of star destroyers before, and who the millions of people manning them are, but... fine.  Whatever.  It still means they won.  At this point he has told Kylo to kill Rey again, and also revealed who she is.  "Hey, go kill my granddaughter.  Thanks!"

He gets bored at some point and sends out one of the Star Destroyers, blows up a planet.  This star destroyer isn't explicitly accounted for later.  Just saying.  Then he sits back, and he waits for the next thing to happen passively.  He senses, presumably, when Rey is coming.  He certainly is aware when she enters the system, and he must know that she could be bringing the remains of the resistance down on him.  This would be a great time to launch all the star destroyers.

Nah.

So Rey walks in, and he tells her that he WANTED her to come even though he had been sending people to kill her this whole time.  He convinces her that he wants her to kill him and become the new Big Bad Sith - this is super clumsy if it's true, but if it's bullshit it's not a bad idea.  So let's give him some credit and say he never wanted her to kill him and it was reverse psychology - kill me, please, this is my plan!

Kylo shows up too, somehow.  Wait.  Rey stole his ship, right?  Whatever, he called an Uber.  Anyway, he's there and Palps tries to have him killed but that doesn't work.  Then they're both there in front of him and he remembers that he can suck the life out of them.  He couldn't do that to the Snokes Crew, but here's the pick me up he needed.  And then he chucks Kylo down a bottomless shaft because that always works, and... well, okay, it didn't work when Vader threw him down one.  But surely this time it will.  And then he tries to kill Rey.

In the past when he tried to use force lightning on someone with a light saber it went really badly.  This happened several times, but it's his go-to move.  Sure, he could pick up Rey and bash her into a wall until she's paste or something but no!�� Force lightning is sooooo cool!  I mean, he's strong enough now that he can, somehow, use force lightning to target every single enemy ship in the sky without looking so killing Rey is no big deal.

Just like those other times, though, she blocks it with the light saber.  It's doing the feedback thing some, and she looks super intense like she's going to try something.  He could just stop the lightning and do that force smash thing.  But but but... force lightning!  So he keeps going.  She blasts him, somehow, and he keeps going, and she does it again and he... explodes.

Huh.

It kinda seems like if he had done anything differently he would have won, and like every part of his plan was needlessly overcomplicated.  It seems like he had the power and resources to take over the entire galaxy at any moment and yet remained invisible enacting redundant or contradictory plans until the last minute.

So, can it work?  Is there a story that makes the revelations of Episode 9 fit into the rest of the story?  Kinda!  But it's super, super stupid.

[gmariam19]

Finished The Rise of Skywalker tonight, and have two things to say, and maybe more later. First of all, I still love Poe. He has some great moments in this. As a big fan of Poe, I’d obviously love to see him do more, but I worried that maybe after three months of idolizing him on Tumblr, I would be more disappointed in his character, and I wasn’t. I kind of lived for the moments he was onscreen. His speeches were great, his emotional moments with Leia and when he almost calls off the fleet were heartbreaking. I kind of wish he had saved Finn instead of Lando on Exegol, but that’s me being a mushy romantic, maybe. He doesn’t get a big hero moment like the others, which would have been nice (ie, saving FInn, plus it would have been a nice circle from Finn saving him in TFA) but he leads well: he noticeably doesn’t make the mistakes he made in TLJ, he’s stronger. He is so supportive of others, and so gorgeous, and will forever be one of my favorite characters. Strangely enough, I barely noticed The Scarf. Huh. I mentioned Finn yesterday, and I still think he was underused, but he gets some good speeches, too, back on Ajan Kloss, and that kick-ass run with the ground troops, so the second half went better for him. (Although running after Rey to the Death Star was completely unnecessary and did absolutely nothing for his character or the story. Boo.) And best of all was just how much his Force sensitivity comes out at Exegol, and it is glorious. Finn will be a great Jedi one day - honestly, better than Rey in many ways. *ducks* (Which is odd of me to say because I am outlining a big fic where he is extremely reluctant to become a Jedi. Go figure. It kind of breaks my heart, now. That will make it harder to write.) Second of all, my family is officially sick of my commentary and fact dropping. I mean, they should totally know Jannah is Lando’s daughter and Wedge is Snap’s stepfather and Snap is married and that’s now the fourth time Rey has run off on her own in this movie and she’s a dyad in the Force with Ben Solo and that’s her theme in the background and and Poe’s parents were at Endor and he wears his mother’s ring and look, R2 brought Luke the message from Leia and now he’s there when she dies -- Right? Doesn’t everyone want to know that stuff? It’s good stuff! They told me to stop. I didn’t.  😇 So - yes. I’m not disappointed, I’m excited! There’s a lot of stuff that is just ridiculous and regrettable, but I’m still in love with the characters and the universe. Which is probably why I’m almost done with the 5k story about Rey and Poe (not a couple sorry never a couple Finnpoe all the way to the end) I started yesterday! WOOT WOOT!

[local-star-wars-kinda-nerd]

Episode IX review.

In short, my primary reaction was facepalm.

I had a bad feeling about this episode since first teaser has been released. It made me feel... nothing, which was strange. When any teaser or trailer for previous films had been released, I got excited about these movies. Every one of them: from The Force Awakens to Solo. But not this time. And, unfortunately, I was right (at least for myself).

Detailed review is under cut, as well as spoilers are. You've been warned. I also want to warn you that I'm not professional critic, just a fan like a lot of other people.

IMHO, the whole trilogy should've been made by one director. No guarantee this would make these movies a lot better, but at least the story would've been whole. Why am I saying this? Because one of the biggest, if not the main, problems of TROS is it's trying to apologize before fans for mistakes made in episode VIII. Instead of trying to fix them, giving a good and understandable explanation for questions left after TLJ, they just said: "Forget about episode VIII ever existed". No jokes, I could've just watch TROS after TFA without watching TLJ and only questions I'd have are where is Snoke, why Kylo's mask is destroyed, where is Luke. And that's disappointing. I'm not saying episode VIII was perfect, it has done some things wrong, but also some things were good. And they should work on fixing bad and improving good. I realize that J.J.Abrams was given an impossible task: to finish Star Wars saga with the most unstable fan base. TROS was gonna be hated anyway, no matter what director has done with it.

Okay. What I liked about The Rise of Skywalker?

- More Poe and Finn interactions. I know it's not enough, but they made a really cool bromance.

- C-3PO. Just C-3PO.

- Luke training Leia the Jedi ways.

- The idea of redeemed Kylo Ren (or Ben Solo at this point). I only wish his redemption arc has been executed better.

- Hey, they haven't forgotten about Anakin's existence, the true Chosen One.

- Visual effects. As always, magnificent.

- Lightsaber duels also looked good.

- Luke admitting that he made mistakes and that he shouldn't been hiding on Ach-To.

- Hey, they showed that Rey had some kind of training.

- Finn turned out to be Force-sensitive. I thought it would be cool since TFA has been released.

- Music, because I love John Williams' work obviously. Though sometimes some tracks from other episodes in this movie seemed off.

Now, to things I disliked or even hated (forgive me, I'm a simple human being with the right to feel negative emotions towards things. I'm not gonna hate or blame other people for their disagreement with me):

- Too fast. TROS had some good scenes, but I couldn't feel their weight and importance because everything was going too fast.

- Maybe it's just me, but despite movie's best efforts it hasn't managed to convince me that the main trio is a team. Poe and Finn - yes, their friendship was obvious since TFA. Finn and Rey - also believable friendship (for me). But I never got feeling that all of them are good team, best friends. A New Hope managed to make the same thing way better.

- Kylo's mask. In TLJ destroying the mask was important point of his character arc. Snoke just humiliated him for being beaten by a just scavenger and pointed at that Kylo isn't Vader, only a child wearing a mask and pretending to be his famous grandfather. And at this moment Kylo decides to stop trying to be someone else (even someone he idolizes) and finally try to be himself. And then he repairs it in TROS. Why? There is no explanation in movie. My guess is on a huge amount of hate towards Adam Driver and his appearance.

- Remember Rose from TLJ? Well, either your answer is yes or no, forget about her. You barely will be able to notice her role in this movie. Yes, she did questionable thing. Yes, she was hated by half of fans. And that's why you will even forget that she was here.

- Palps is back! Remember how he returned from dead in EU? He's also not dead in our movie! So it vanishes importance of every episode made by Lucas, so what? Ya boy Palps is back! Aren't you glad? Okay, no jokes. When a lot of people hated TFA and TLJ, I thought: "Hey, at least these episodes haven’t made the biggest mistake EU's post-Endor made (and by this said "Anakin's sacrifice and Luke's path don't matter! Balance isn't restored, Sith are still there, the Empire isn't dead yet, have fun!") - they haven't brought Sidious back. Sequels still have a chance to be a not bad trilogy". And then the teaser happened. Honestly, his comeback feels like a YouTube theory on the big screen. That's what you expected from the finale of great Skywalker saga? Total unimportance of Skywalker's sacrifice. Alright, it would be only half of trouble. The real pain is Palpatine's comeback makes no sense. How he survived? Why waited so long? What he even wanted? What was his plan?

- If there is a thing I liked the most about The Last Jedi, it's Rey's parents being just scavengers, who sold their daughter for drinks. Again, since I watched TFA in theater, I was hoping the creators won't make Rey Skywalker, Kenobi, Palpatine, Bridger, or anyone else at this point. But no. She is Palpatine's granddaughter. And somehow this explains her abilities. I have no idea how. And it also feels like writers were looking for YouTube theories about Rey's bloodline and just picked the most popular one.

- Rey is Mary Sue. More than ever. I absolutely don't mind her a being powerful Force-user, but please, can anybody explain me how she manages to use tricks without training some Jedi couldn't use even with years of training and practicing? This explanation from TLJ novel sucks, honestly. In TFA she used mind trick. How? Okay, she did only once, maybe that's all. In TLJ she moves a hella lot rocks. How? Alright, not everything is too bad. But in TROS she is using Force lightning, healing, she holds a ship(!). And that's because... what? Palpatine's blood? No. No, and again no. Being daughter of someone powerful doesn't mean you can now do every-freaking-thing with the Force you want. And thing is, she face no consequences of such power. What do you say? She killed Chewbacca? Nope, he's alive, and we didn't even have time to believe in his death, and Rey has no time to realize the cost her uncontrolled power. Does she need help in defeating Palpatine? Well, voices of Jedi helped her to rise, but why it had to be her alone? If you present us Rey and Kylo being a diade (sorry for spelling, wasn’t watching in English), be so nice to use it.

- Redeemed Ben doesn't matter. He isn't remembered, no one's gonna be upset of his death, he won't show in the final scene as a member of Skywalker family (and why Anakin isn't there is big mystery too).

- I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings. Reylo. Yet another thing I didn’t want to be brought into movies since TFA. I don’t believe in their love. I can believe that Kylo cares for Rey after she shows some amount of compassion towards him, something he hasn't got in years. I can accept that Rey wants to help Kylo to return to light (honestly no idea why she does, but I can accept it), but not love to death. They just didn’t have enough time or interactions to make their feelings believable, if these feeling are even real. As someone who thinks that Arcann's romance is pretty fast, even it is way more believable (and his redemption arc is better, too).

In the end, question is, was the sequel trilogy needed? Maybe. The story could've been finished better. Was this trilogy needed? I'd say no. Nothing has really changed, we still don't know if Jedi Order is going to be reborn, or the new order will come to replace them, or what is going to be with all Force-sensitive at all. This episode was supposed to be the finale of whole Star Wars saga, but for a finale it leaves way too many questions about future. As finale of Skywalker story, there's not enough Skywalker's influence for victory over Palpatine. Especially Anakin's. He is the Chosen One (or at least was before TROS), and everything he did to finally bring Palpatine down in this movie is... said a few lines. No more than any other Jedi. It destroys all previous episodes for me. It hurts me to admit that for the first time I was shocked by how a Star Wars movie turned out. In bad meaning. Of all new movies The Last Jedi was my least favorite, and still I like it. The Force Awakens had great potential, even with everything Abrams did. Solo was such a satisfying story for me. Rogue One is personal favorite of new movies. But The Rise of Skywalker made me sad and disappointed. And that's considering I love a lot of Star Wars. For me, it wasn't worth it.

[renegade-skywalker]

Midnight Flight, Chapter 3

Chapter 1: (tumblr link) (AO3) Chapter 2: (tumblr link) Homestead Chapter 3: Forgotten Ruins

Summary:  Finn and Rey follow the map to an ancient Jedi stronghold, lost to time and memory.

“Do you want to take a go this time?” Rey asked as they approached the hopper, her voice quiet and calm on the night air, as if careful not to disturb the landscape despite the thrill of adventure coursing their veins.

Finn considered it, watching the vessel loom into view as they neared. Rey examined the symbol on the map as she awaited a response, and it was her rapt attention to the image’s every detail that set Finn’s decision for him.

“Sure,” he said, almost hesitant, but feeling the confidence take hold as he spoke the word.

Rey glanced at him and smiled before walking up the loading ramp and taking to the co-pilot’s chair. She fiddled with the dash controls and played around the with odd looking radar while Finn got himself situated. The controls were not too different from the ship he flew on Crait, and all of the extra gadgets could easily be monitored by Rey if need be, hence the co-pilot’s seat.

He laced his fingers around the yoke, feeling the rough leather as his palms grew comfortable with the shape of it. It’s weight was comforting, somewhat, but there was no way to know just how sensitive the thing was until they took off. He considered asking Rey how smooth she found the controls, but the look of pure concentration on her face told him otherwise. She had figured out the radar, it seemed, and was playing around with some of the smaller dials and switches that surrounded the thing, looking back to the map in her hand every so often.

Finn smiled, and settled further into his chair, overcome with a confidence he did not know before. He glanced away from Rey and looked to the stars, craning his head so he could see the canopy of stars above the sleeping landscape that surrounded them. It was just as breathtaking as before, if not more so. The quiet calm settled over the grasses, the cool, blue-white light of Dantooine’s moon shining down on them as the tall stalks swayed gently in the breeze.

“What is it?” Rey asked, quietly again.

“It’s just… quiet,” he said, admiring the dark and the soft light, “It’s nice for a change.”

Rey’s expression fell a bit, but she joined him in looking up at the sky nonetheless.

“It was always quiet on Jakku, but I didn’t really appreciate it. I don’t even think I noticed it after a while.”

“It’s nice,” he said, “Lights out was the only time it would ever be quiet, and even then there were always troopers on duty. We were on a constant rotation, so even when some of us had downtime, there was always someone prepping for their shift.”

“Lights out?”

Finn looked at Rey, her brows knotted as she turned from the sky to face him again. She looked so tired, so worn now. Even on Jakku, after what must have already been hours in the sun, she was awake and alert. Her eyes were bright, especially when he told her he was Resistance at first, and even later her face was alight when they congratulated each other on the Falcon after their brief victory against the First Order TIEs. She didn’t seem sad now, but a lot had happened. There was so much to process. What happened before she had met up with them, exactly? Where was Luke?

“Finn?”

“Sorry, I was just-” he inhaled, and looked forward again, watching as his fingers curled and unfurled over the yoke, getting himself used to the weight of it in his hands. “Stormtroopers live by a very strict schedule. Lights out was when we slept, or at least, when we were allotted time to sleep.”

Every moment was structured as a trooper, there wasn’t room for anything else. The First Order wanted it that way. Less chance of their soldiers getting a sense of themselves or thinking too much. It had only been a few days since his escape, give or take, and this was the most Finn had ever thought for himself in his life.

“Strange,” Rey said, “But it makes sense, I guess, for a military. I never thought about it, but I had a schedule, too. Up before sunrise, back before sundown. Even the moments in between were rigid, but mostly because of the weather. Didn’t want to get swallowed up by the sands.”

Rey laughed quietly, a sadness creeping into her voice as she looked away. She coughed purposefully and sat up straight, shaking whatever thoughts plagued her from her mind to focus on the task at hand.

“Ready?” she asked, looking suddenly unsure. Whatever happened with Luke must have taken a lot out of her, and perhaps that was why she wanted to follow the map so badly. Finn thought that finding Luke meant finding the Jedi, but that no longer seemed to be the case.

“Ready,” he assured, pocketing his questions for later. He’d let Rey talk in her own time, and he liked the feeling of Rey beside him. It felt something like home, something warm and welcoming, and he wanted it to stay.

Rey smiled this time, and though it appeared forced it did not seem to be for his benefit, but for her own. As if she were trying to convince herself that this was a good idea.

“Okay, now you’ll want to-” Rey began, diving into a basic explanation of what Finn was to do next. He couldn’t help but watch her, her face changing as she began explaining, her expertise coming through in every word. She was truly in her element, now. Like Poe, Rey seemed made for flying, and Finn was still surprised she had done so little of it before now, judging by the way she spoke.

“What is it?” Rey asked with a pause, smoothing back her hair as her face grew red. “Am I going too fast?”

“No, no,” Finn said, laughing now, “Well, maybe a little, but I was just thinking-”

“What?”

Finn almost wanted to say how cute she looked, how her brows raised as she talked a mile a minute and how her energy seemed to spike the moment she thought about flying despite her mood only seconds before.

Cute. It was almost an insult.

“It suits you,” he said finally, “Flying. You’re a natural.”

Rey blushed again but sat smugly in her seat, leaning into the chair’s back and sinking into it as she looked away from Finn.

“Really?” she asked after a moment, hardly able to hide her smile.

This is better, Finn thought. Rey’s smile was as radiant as the sky outside, full of stars - if not more so. He knew they’d have to talk sometime, but now was not it.

“Really,” he pledged, looking ahead himself. “Okay, I’m really ready this time.”

Rey laughed again, and went through the instructions, slower this time. Finn did as she said, flipping switches and toggling dials just as Rey said to do so. Rey did her share of the work as she went on, and within moments the planet hopper was humming comfortably beneath them again.

With a gentle pull, Finn lifted them off the ground, reveling in the feeling now that he had the time to. The ascent was almost pleasant, aside from the feeling of his stomach dropping on the first jolt, and it was especially preferable to jumping in a ship and immediately heading the First Order straight on. Now, there was only moonlit fields and miles of grass pin-pricked with trees that dotted the horizon.

Rey told him where to go as she watched the radar in the center console, keeping an eye on the map in her hand all the while. She guided him down toward a valley, the sun only just jutting over the edge of the planet as it threatened morning. Finn could feel his every muscle tensing as he guided the ship toward ground again, careful not to hit anything, and careful not to be too careful. Rey laughed as she guided him, abandoning the co-pilot’s chair and mirroring Finn beside him, her hands resting over his as she guided him with a gentle touch. Finn’s skin prickled, too afraid to crash to do anything else, and before they knew it, they were safely back down on solid ground.

Rey removed her hands from his, and Finn regretted not relishing in the moment more. He felt himself blush, and imagined Rey did as much, as he enabled the landing gear per her instructions and settled the planet hopper once and for all. The engine stopped thrumming, and they were left to the last dregs of nighttime to explore the area beyond.

“Shall we?” Finn asked, glancing at Rey.

Her hazel eyes scanned the landscape, pupils darting about as they visually excavated the valley before them. After a moment, she came back to herself, and nodded.

“Let’s.”

Finn felt his hand reach for the small of her back as he ushered her ahead of him out of the cockpit, and Rey obliged, leaning into him slightly before moving onward. He shivered, unsure of himself and what he was doing. But whatever it was, it felt… natural. As if it were meant to be this way. He watched Rey carefully, scared that he may have overstepped, but once they were out on the grass, she clung to him, her hand instinctively reaching for his once his boots met grass again.

“Rey?"

She did not respond. Rey stood there, eyes closed, both of her hands clutching Finn’s right one. His fingers itched, wondering what to do with them when Rey opened her eyes again.

“I feel something,” she said, coming to as if waking from a dream. “Something… old. Very old.”

Finn looked around, the landscape now muddled with the first flecks of dawnlight, making everything murky. But despite his eyesight, Finn felt something… saw something? He wasn’t sure. But somehow he knew that beyond the ridge before them was… something.

Rey did not wait for Finn to respond, instead leading him by the hand now towards the formation. A ridge of moss-covered rock stood before them, the valley on the other side. Rey brought Finn to the edge, and let go of his hand, her fingers lingering before leaving his skin entirely, to get a better look over the side.

“There’s a building here,” she said, her eyes wide, “There’s something beneath us.”

Finn joined her, staying close to the ground to get a better look. Sure enough, there was evidence of a wall face in the valley’s gorge, and looking at it now it appeared more like a crater than anything nature-made.

“Something happened here,” he stated, his voice heavy with the realization, “A long time ago.”

Rey leaned close to him, and whispered, “How do you know?”

“There,” Finn pointed at a few spots below them, outlining the valley and a few of its features, “A natural valley wouldn’t be curved like that. See? It’s almost like a circle. Like someone dropped a bomb here.”

“Must have been some time ago,” Rey added, solemn. “It’s so overgrown now. Forgotten.”

Finn could only nod. Enough time had passed that a small series of ponds had formed at the base of the crater, and the architectural remains in its climbing sides were now covered in moss, grass, and ivy. This building must have stood on flat ground once, like the farmstead from before. But someone saw to it that this place was destroyed.

“I think we can get in through there,” Finn said, noticing a path of rock that sloped down more gradually, a crumbled wall at its base about a kilometer down. “Should be easy enough.”

Rey did not protest, and it was only a moment before Finn was reminded of her affinity for climbing. Finn was amazed as he watched her scale the sides of the hangar in Starkiller Base, never once thinking of doing the same himself. And yet it had come so naturally to Rey. It was no wonder she was able to maneuver about the base undetected. It was ingenious.

Finn could almost laugh as he trailed her, noticing that Rey was so eager to explore that she didn’t pause to see if Finn was following. He scrambled to catch up in her wake, finding himself smiling. The adventure was back on again.

Dawn crept around them as they descended, Rey lowering herself as if it were a sixth sense while Finn calculated every backwards step. With every advance downward, the rock face brightened slightly, Finn’s back growing warmer and warmer with the rising sun. By the time they reached the crumbled wall, Finn had broken into a light sweat, but the cool of early morning swept it away with a calm breeze as they stood side by side, peering into the murky unknown.

In the side of the valley, a wall colored like red clay but most likely something synthetic, sunk into the side of the overgrown moss and ivy that hung from above, a dark veil masking the way, leading into what must have once been the place of Jedi.

Rey looked at the map in her hand, examining the new valley around them and comparing it to the geographical lines on the metal blueprint. Finn looked at the map over her shoulder, realizing that his hunch was right. This place had once stood on even ground, but now it lay in the ruins of its own destruction. Who did this? Why?

Rey said nothing, but Finn felt a world of feeling rolling off of her as she shifted her weight from foot to foot by his side. He looked at her sidelong, but knew better than to ask what was wrong - he already knew. Whatever had happened out there with Luke Skywalker had not gone as planned, or perhaps as expected, and though Rey could clearly command the Force, there was something about the Jedi in particular that had her on edge.

Without thinking, Finn extended a hand, merely brushing hers at first, but then he was hooking his pinky around Rey’s like an anchor in a silent I know.

Rey glanced up at him through her lashes, the tiredness showing on her face despite her determination. Finn nodded at her, assuring her silently that he’d be at her side every step of the way. Rey’s expression dissolved from shy appreciativeness to calm resolve, taking a step forward into the darkness that laid before them.

Even though the inner chambers were wreathed in shadow, Finn knew where he was going. The sun was jutting its early head, but its light was still faint on the horizon still, and hardly any of it penetrated the space ahead. Yet with Rey at his side, Finn felt no uncertainty. He could somehow sense where the rock wall ended, where the debris lay beyond, and where a hallway began on the other side, almost as if he’d been here before.

Nevertheless, Finn rummaged in his pockets, pulling out a glowrod when he felt it nudging him in the hip. He shook the small cylinder until its light emerged, like a single star in a miniature galaxy full of nothingness. The halls were dilapidated, but travelable, and a cool breeze kept hitting their faces, gently from the dark, a sign that there was an open space somewhere ahead.

“I wonder when this happened,” Rey said, running her hand along one of the walls, watching her fingers as they traced the intricate designs carved into them.

“Maybe we’ll find out,” Finn said, feeling the cool spot growing closer and closer as they walked on.

They peered into rooms, most blocked off or caved in, some with roots sprouting out of their ceilings, the trees above having long taken refuge in this place and claimed it for the earth. Yet it did not feel intrusive, it felt… peaceful. As if the Jedi might have preferred this over some other alternative, as if they had bequeathed the ruins of this place for the planet to claim in their absence knowing that it would be in good hands.

“It’s definitely been a while,” Finn said after searching what he could of one of the rooms, spying an ancient protocol droid in pieces in the far corner. It was too far for him to tell, but from his studies he knew the droid had to have been at least a few hundred years old, so it was maybe just as long since this place was in use. “I don’t think Vader was the only one to hate the Jedi.”

“Vader, or the Emperor,” Rey chimed in, knowingly but quiet.

Finn turned to her, curious, cocking his head as if asking her to elaborate.

“Luke told me,” she began. “Vader was rumored to have the same power as the Jedi he defeated, but he was taught by another, what Luke called a Sith, someone who trained in the Dark Side of the Force.”

“The Dark Side,” Finn echoed, thinking of Han as he explained the map to Skywalker on the Falcon - the Dark Side, and the Light.

“Lord Vader was manipulated by Emperor Palpatine, tempted to join him by promising that he could teach him to use powers the Jedi feared, powers that would save his family.”

“Luke,” Finn said, the realization dawning on him as a cold shiver ran down his back, “And General Organa.”

He didn’t know the whole story, but bits and pieces connected in his mind as his brain reconciled what he knew of the New Republic from his studies as a trooper and what he’d learned in the last few days with the Resistance. Somehow it made sense, but it also didn’t. Finn wasn’t exactly clear on how Luke and Leia were siblings yet had different names, and while he suddenly felt pity for Vader when he was once taught to revere the man for his harsh tactics, he wondered how Kylo Ren fit into all this, how he somehow twisted his grandfather’s anguish into a rallying cry for greatness. From what Rey said, Vader never sought greatness, but perhaps only order. Hux wanted order. Phasma wanted order. But Ren? The man seemed to want anything but.

Despite the questions bubbling in his head, Finn pressed on, watching Rey as they continued exploring.

“What was he like?” Finn finally asked, “What happened?”

Rey stopped in her tracks, fidgeting with her hands as she sought out the right words.

“Lost,” she answered, “He was lost. He thought he was alone, but he didn’t have to be. At least, I don’t think so.”

“Wait, are we talking about Luke or Ren?” Finn could feel something wrench at his gut at the realization, knowing that Rey had met more of the Skywalker family than anyone he knew, other than General Organa. At this, Rey laughed, though she didn’t seem amused.

“I was talking about Luke, but I believe it applies to… to Ren too, if I think about it.”

Rey repeated the name, Ren, whatever that meant. Ever since learning of the man’s origins, Finn wondered where the name came from, but then again no name in this family made any sense to him - Organa, Solo, Skywalker. There were so many of them, and each of them different. Not that Finn would know, he had no family to speak of. At least not one that he remembered.

“It’s hard to say what happened,” Rey said again, picking up the pace, “I’m still trying to figure that out myself.”

Finn sighed, nodding.

“One helluva week, huh?” Finn rejoined, eager to lighten the mood.

Rey laughed, a genuine laugh with a smile that met her eyes this time, as she hoisted herself up onto some rocks in their way, turning back to look at Finn, watching him wonderingly.

“You almost sounded like Han, there,” she said, the smile and the laugh dissolving, though not completely. “I still can’t believe I only knew him for a day. It felt like-”

“Forever?” Finn finished.

Rey continued climbing, but nodded in response.

“Yeah, me too,” he said, remembering the man fondly. In an instant, his memory conjured up an image of the man’s crooked smile, one that hardly met his indifferent eyes hiding the wealth of feeling bubbling within him. Solo had known Finn. He’d figured him out in a minute and was already on his case the next. But he didn’t judge him. He just knew. Han had been that person once, a young man caught in a lie he couldn’t see himself out of, digging his hold deeper with every word, but meaning only the best just the same. Or at least that was the impression Finn got.

“There’s so much I still don’t understand,” Rey admitted, lending a hand to Finn so he could hoist himself over the debris. “There are so many pieces, and somehow I fit into them but also… not at all.”

“I think I know what you mean,” Finn said, sitting on the crumbling rock wall instead of climbing over it this time, looking at Rey as he took a breath, “All this Resistance stuff. I still don’t really feel like I belong here, even though I agree with everything they say and believe in everything they do. Yet I also feel like I did more than prove myself enough to be trusted, y’know?”

Finn thought of Rose back on the Falcon, how she had admired him but failed to trust him all the same. He knew she meant well. It must have been hard having someone you love not come home, your whole life taken away from you in an instant. Finn could only guess, but he still felt the outsider for it, and there was nothing he could do.

Rey paused as well, watching Finn now. She nodded, not saying a word, knowing. She sighed, picking at her fingernails and rubbing rubble for her palms as she considered how to say what she was thinking.

“I thought I was ready to learn who I really was, but it turns out I knew I already knew it all along. I’m just… Rey.”

Rey turned now and hoisted herself off the edge of the debris, landing softly on the other side. Finn leaned over the edge and looked down at her.

“You are Rey,” he smiled, letting himself down too. “That’s enough for me.”

“And you’re Finn.”

“Is that enough for you?” Finn almost meant it as a joke, but he found himself serious as he stood to full height, dusting the light dirt from his pants.

“It’s more than enough,” Rey said, swallowing a smile, “In fact, it’s-”

A splash interrupted Rey’s words, and both of their heads shot in the opposite direction. On the other side of the debris wall was another veil of ivy, and beyond that…

They both looked back at each other, eyes wide but eager, before falling into step and slowly approaching the ivy. They each extended a hand, moving the vines aside to let them pass, and Finn felt the air escape his lungs.

“Wow,” Rey whispered, emotion welling in her voice.

On the other side of the ivy was a courtyard, full of life. This place was overgrown, too, but the ceiling had completely fallen in, allowing the sun through, and birds came and went as they pleased. An old fountain stood in the center, a series of large basins stacked on top of one another in an intricate waterfall, pooling at its base. Several of the bowls were full of leaves and algae, but the fountain worked still, housing all matter of wildlife from fish and birds, to storks and foxes that darted around the yard and up and out of the ceiling entrance.

Finn and Rey circled the space, the sun now fully over the horizon and setting the water in the fountain ablaze, shining a warm honeyed gold in the reflection of its rays.

Emotion clawed at Finn’s throat, an unspoken sadness eating its way inside him as he suddenly thought of this place as it must have been in another life - Jedi, cloaked and curious, milling about the temple center, speaking to one another, asking questions, masters and apprentices going over lessons as life continued on beyond these walls. Yet the place was not lifeless, not all was lost. An ecosystem had sought to survive here despite the wreckage, and the place and the animals seemed all the better for it.

Before Finn knew it, Rey was out of sight. He was alone in the yard, spinning around in search of her as a nest of young birds cawed at the sky for their mother gone to hunt.

“Rey?” Finn asked, meeting no answer. “Rey?”

Looking around, Finn saw that several branches of halls sprouted out from the central courtyard, some barred but most not. A few were also veiled in ivy, but there was one that was clear. Without thinking, Finn walked toward it, repeating “Rey? Are you in here? Where’d you go?”

“Over here!” her voice echoed from everywhere. Finn spun around, in search of the source but unsure of its origin.

From the corner of his eye, there was light. Finn turned to peer into the dark of the hallway only to find it empty.

“Rey?’

A hollow mumble sounded from around the far corner, where the hallway veered right. He wasn’t sure what it was or what it said, but it sounded like something humanoid.

“Rey, are you over here?” he called as he turned the corner, but Rey wasn’t here either. Instead, at the end of the hall, a mass of glittering blue light hovered in midair, as if it were watching him.

Finn froze. The mass of light hung in the air for a moment, as if making sure that Finn was watching, before dissolving into the wall beside it.

It wants me to follow.

After everything he’d seen and experienced, not just in his life but since he escaped the Finalizer as it hovered in Jakku’s orbit, Finn knew it probably wasn’t a good idea to trust just anything, yet somehow Finn felt safe, he knew he was meant for this.

For a moment, he saw the hallway, imagining how it curved around and opened up into a large chamber full of light, as if pulling the image from a memory. He blinked and the hallway was dark again, the glittering mass gone.

“Finn?”

Rey was beside him now, a careful hand on his shoulder.

“Are… you alright?”

“I think we need to go this way,” he said definitively, squaring his shoulders. He wasn’t even sure why he said it, he only knew it to be true. They hadn’t come here with any specific ulterior motive other than seeing where the Jedi may have studied once. Maybe they left something behind? Or there was something here they were simply meant to find? Finn couldn’t be too sure, but he wanted to find out.

Rey watched him, confused but still at his side. She didn’t question him, but instead looked ahead at where his gaze was fixed, her eyes falling on the space where the mass of light had hung in the air only moments before.

“I…” Rey shook her head, surprise spreading over her face as her eyes lit up, “I’m not sure how, but I think you’re right. No, I know you’re right.”

Her voice was soft in its revelation, her hand gripping Finn’s upper arm in earnest now. He almost wanted to laugh at her enthusiasm, not to make fun of her but because it was nice to see, but he liked the weight of her hand on his arm and the way she stood so close as she looked on over his shoulder so he said nothing.

“Let’s do this,” she said, her eyes bright and curious. Finn nodded and led the way.

[thebigreylotheory]

TLJ Review Part Three: Reylo

Well, my Reylos and other Star Wars people-I-amuse-in-some-way, taking my sweet time just like the holidays, I guess it might be a good idea to finish my TLJ review before the Blu-ray/DVD release tomorrow…hmm? (I still want a VHS copy.)

Been busy getting born Bob Dylan-style. And not feeling particularly Star Warsy (as a sensitive person I can feel negativity and Kylo-style I just wanna let it all die.)

And, also, I was waiting on the TLJ Novelization, which IMO was vague and silly.

(I knew it wasn’t going to be Nights In White Reylo Satin…

But I didn’t know Kylo was Napoleon Dynamite who catches lightsaber pies,

Rose is Jane Brady, jealous of Marcia “Rey,” who kisses ex-stormtroopers just to try it like the Katy Perry song,

and Leia really, really believes Luke could have a Jedi ship army…cause now this strong heroine “needs” rescuing after all this time.)

BUT let’s go back to the movie. Let’s time-travel all the way back to December 14th, 2017:

when I had emotionally prepared myself for nothing Reylo to happen. Great Expectations leads to suffering in the butchered words of Yoda.

I felt very minimalist about it. I told myself I’d be happy if Rey and Ren (cause I didn’t know calling him Kylo was a thing, no one called him just “Kylo” in TFA) had more scenes together. I’d be happy if, perhaps, they had another good fight. Or, if Kylo Ren gave Rey a good, bad puppy stare. That was the least I wanted. I was prepared to go home happy with just that in my Star Wars basket.

Rey and Ren would have to be friends, I thought. I told myself, if Reylo is ever going to happen, they have to momentarily be on the same side, or with the same goal.

However, I reasoned, throwing out every Reylo theory, that most people wanted a showdown involving Luke, Rey, and Kylo. So, I figured to keep the movie good and tense, they’d delay Rey and Kylo being in the same scene until the black moment. I thought, I’d be biting my nails and about to vomit wondering if Luke was still Rey’s dad, while Kylo pouted about not being Rey’s teacher and possibly offered her another opportunity to be schooled while explaining the connection between them…

I told myself I enjoyed being this hyper-character-form-of-myself TheBigReyloTheory, and toy photography, and fanfics, and meeting and sharing with other fans, while it lasted. For me, it was more about a distraction and having fun, looking through a glass darkly, than being absolutely right. Which is starting to sound like Joseph Campbell’s “The Fan’s Journey”*, not to be confused by “The Fan With A Thousand Faces”* (*not real books…I think).

But, the moment Luke tossed the lightsaber away, I had a strong hunch: something Reylo-y will happen.

I knew if Luke wouldn’t willingly teach and tell Rey everything she wanted to hear, there’d be something she’d seek from Kylo Ren. However, there again, I didn’t think this something would materialize until the worst possible moment.

Then suddenly, in the words of the Star-Wars-bubba randomly seated next to me, who was dipping into his TLJ collectible cup, “Something weird happened.”

Weird, indeed, bubba.

Kylo Ren and Rey sharing some sort of Force power? A connection across the stars?

REYLO HAPPENED.

They went from “Hiss boo!” (You’re-a-monster-yes-i-am. Perfect exchange, btw.)

To Rey letting Kylo measure her for a pair of gloves. Her hands were probably cold in the cave. And you see, Kylo has a member-discount at Gloves R Us. (Hand touch scene: OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG, btw.)

How quickly this friendly-ship developed shocked me. In a good way. I really didn’t expect we’d be getting a “willing” touch, a will-they-won’t-they-kiss moment, or a proposal.

I was on a rollercoaster of emotions.

As a romance reader, anytime the heroine sees the guy shirtless, even in a sweet/clean romance, it usually means there’s gonna be more between them. Even though I totally hope Kylo becomes more self-confident and losses the sauna belt. 

No, Rey, he doesn’t have a cowl to put on. That would take the whole ForceTime session. Have you ever looked up the 501 Kylo Ren Costume Reference?? The man wears a TON of clothes before you even get to cowl! (Is he afraid he’s going to get sucked out into space, like Leia, and freeze?)(I missed out of the whole Reylo sex scene debate, but I gotta say, it would have to be Rey doing a bodice ripper on Kylo to get through all those layers, and that’s all I’m gonna say).

The infinite scene in the Force cave was certainly freaky upon first viewing. It gave off an eerie, rhythmic, dance vibe. There was a strange second were I couldn’t figure out why Star Wars was suddenly being narrated. I was panicking there’d been a huge time jump. And then I also was panicking that the people in The Mirror of Erised were going to be Han and Leia, and I’d have to hurl. I knew this was Reylo or bust.

Never, never, never guessed Rey would be mailing herself to Kylo. Or that Chewie would be helping her accomplish this task. Wonder how many Porg stamps that took? Yeah, yeah stormtroopers cuff her. But notice how they’re alone in the elevator? (And I’m burning the Naan bread trying to find the scene online…I hope that’s not a euphemism.)

When Rey says she’ll help him…Just, wow. I’m on the edge of my seat. It’s almost like she’s saying she’ll be his “help” mate. After seeing the movie three or four times, it was fun to watch the people in front of me lean on the edge of their seat, too. Rey truly goes after what she wants!

I’ll be honest, I thought we might have been getting a lead-up to a Kenobi lineage or Snoke-relation when Kylo says he knows who her parents are…the line in the elevator just felt so heavy especially approaching a “royal” throne room. Almost like he’s going to tell Snoke. 

But I’m not disappointed in Rey’s backstory. I was pretty much cool with any Rey parentage (other than Luke or Han and Leia), so long as some more Reylo could happen.

And, once Snoke made it, kill-the-girl or else, I knew this was it. This was a turning point. I still can’t believe it happened the way it did. It’s probably one of my top movie suspense moments ever. OMG. What is he going to do? OMG. Will that work? OMG. It did!

Victory, plain and simple!

For a moment, everything is right and “going” the “way” I wanted it to go. It was an epic, courageous feeling! A thrill!

And I didn’t think they could top the Starkiller Base fight, hahaha...

Then, of course, the pendulum has to swing the other way.

And, I’m going to do a pure speculation post, so I’m just going to say: most heartbreakingly, interesting proposal ever.

And custody battles over lightsabers are tough.

But, yeah, Reylo happened. And I’m content.

[kyloreign]

a blanket across the stars: part 4

Part 4!

The suns rise over the island and light pours into Rey’s small window high up in her hut. It shines on her face waking her. She sits up sleepily. Then she feels it. A presence. The air goes still… someone is here with her. She glances around and then suddenly there he is. Kylo Ren is sitting across from her in her hut. But… how? Her mind goes straight to Han and she reaches for her blaster, firing into his chest.

*****

A medical droid performs its work, whirring quietly in Kylo’s ear as it steadily pulls together the mending skin on his cheek. Minimizing an outer scar as he can feel the others so raw inside him.

She’s gone. The bridge of the Resistance ship explodes in his mind over and over. The reinforced glass spraying into the darkness, sparkling coldly, each piece carving through his scarred heart. Her presence fading from him like she was being pulled underwater. Further and further away from him. His father and mother both falling away from him. The tightness in his chest is almost unbearable. I am truly alone now.

Suddenly the whirring falls away and he feels someone nearby. He brushes aside the droid. The air feels fresher… he scans the chamber and on what was a bare storage bench on the opposite him, she sits. The girl. Though she’s across the room he can feel her mind like she is mere inches from his face, her breaths move through him as if their lungs are connected. What is this? He can see the sudden rage light her eyes and she grabs an object next to her, and fires directly at him.

Kylo feels the pressure from the shot punch his gut and he gasps, looking down at his chest. But no… he is unharmed. He looks back up but she is gone. How? He scans his room quickly and slides out into the hall. He looks down the corridor and then back up and there she is, standing before him. This is my chance. “You will bring Luke Skywalker to me,” he Force-commands quickly. She just frowns at him. Lowering his arm, he feels slight heat come to his face. Looking her up and down he realizes, she can’t be here. Thinking back to his varied research on the Force when he was with Luke he tries to pinpoint what this could be. He’d read that very powerful Jedi could project their bodies across the galaxy for a short time but it was extremely draining on ones life-force and could result in death. “You’re not doing this the effort would kill you.”

He begins to analyze, trying to figure out how this is happening. “Can you see my surroundings-?”

“You’re going to pay for what you did,” she cuts him off.

“-I can’t see yours… just you,” he gazes at her. Just her. Just like all those years ago. Sleeping on his floor. He feels strangely glad to see her. She’s alright. She wasn’t on the ships he blew up. He just senses anger from her. He’d also read of connections between Force-sensitive individuals able to communicate simple ideas and feelings to each other, he’d seen it when he was young between his mother and Luke. But this is so much stronger…

“No, this is something else,” he ponders aloud. She turns suddenly to look at something to her right. Then looks back at him with an awkward glance. As if she is concerned someone else can see him, and he can see a vague picture coming from her. She is definitely not sending it purposely.  He asks, “Luke?”

*****

When she looks back, he is gone. She explains to Luke that she was cleaning her blaster, when it went off. He seems to buy it.

Her first Jedi lesson is in mediation. Luke wants her to feel the Force around her. She does and it’s beautiful. Connecting life and death and everything in a giant circle. Perfect balance. Luke explains that the Force does not belong to the Jedi. To say that if the Jedi die, the Light dies is pure vanity. Rey thinks this makes sense. The galaxy will keep on turning whether someone notices or not.

But she can feel the pull of something lower, further down. “There’s something else, beneath the island… a place, a dark place.”

“Balance, powerful light, powerful darkness,” Luke acquiesces.

“It’s cold… it’s calling me,” Rey breathes.

“Resist it Rey,” Luke commands.

She can’t. The dark calls her… it has the answers she seeks. Just before she tips over the edge she sees in her mind, she pulls back, and gasps, clinging to the rock she’d be sitting on. Luke looks at her with wide terrified eyes, “You went straight to the dark.”

“That place was trying to show me something,” she explains.

“It offered something you needed and you didn’t even try to stop yourself,” Luke steps away from her. Rey is confused. It didn’t feel like the dark wanted to hurt her. It just pulled at that part of her that has questions. Why should she be afraid finding her answers wherever they may be?

Luke turns back to her, “I’ve seen this raw strength only once before, in Ben Solo. It didn’t scare me enough then, it does now.”

Ben… Kylo? What does he have to do with this?

Rain hammers down on the Falcon as Rey leaves Chewie to continue to try to contact the Resistance. She wants to go see the storm. Rainwater is pouring off the edge of the ship in a waterfall and Rey sticks her hand in it grinning. She’s never seen rain like this before. The ocean is wild and waves are shooting water up onto the cliff side. She closes her eyes feeling the Force in the wind and rain. The passion of it all-

There’s that presence again. It’s him.

*****

Kylo is standing near a bay window, watching fighters being repaired. Repaired from the battle where he lost her. After so many years of trying to deny their existence, now that both his parents are gone, they are constantly on his mind. Twin weights pulling down his heart. Sparks fall from above like raindrops made of cold light- he tilts his head. He can hear the ocean…

He turns as he feels her presence and there she is. Her poncho is shining wet. It must be raining where she is. He is still trying to understand, “Why is the Force connecting us? You and I?”

“Murderous snake,” she interrupts him again and her words are a cold lash across his face. Tracing the scar she put there. She is still so angry, “You’re too late. You lost. I found Skywalker.”

His mind reels. She found him. Has Luke told her? Does she know? He looks her up and down. “Did he tell you what happened?” She looks confused. “The night I destroyed his temple, did he tell you why?”

“I know everything I need to know about you,” she spits. Still such anger. He comes closer, looking into her eyes.

“You do?” He searches her, no, Luke hasn’t told that story yet. Her eyes glitter. “Ah, you do. You have that look in your eyes. From the forest. When you called me a monster.”

“You are a monster,” she glares, such passion in her face. Despite the cold rain and wind he can sense around her, the heat of her spirit warms him.

His eyes bore into hers intensely and he returns that heat, “Yes. Yes I am.”

*****

Rey’s brow furrows, her face feels warm. This connection is so… intimate, all their emotions apparent and clear. She hadn’t expected him to admit to it. She can see in his eyes that he owns his misdeeds. She can feel the guilt that plagues him as a result. She had thought that he took pleasure in killing and torturing. Had no qualms about getting rid of anyone who stood in his way. But she can see each scar he takes on laid bare. This insight was an interesting one. As wave crashes on the cliff her eyes run along the visible scar on his face. Her scar. She’s marked him. Kylo’s light dappled face vanishes and she feels a shiver down her back.

****

As she disappears, Kylo feels a trickle running down his cheek. Next to the scar she’d made. Her mark on him. He runs his gloved palm over his mouth and sees that it comes away dripping with water. How?

****

Rey’s second lesson begins. “The Jedi are romanticized, deified. But if you strip away the myth and look at their deeds, the legacy of the Jedi is failure. Hypocrisy, hubris.”

“That’s not true,” Rey protests.

They sit by a pool lined with tiles. They form the image of a Jedi meditating, split in half down the middle by a lightsaber. One side light, and one dark. Forming the balance.

“It was a Jedi master who was responsible for the training and creation of Darth Vader,” Luke elaborates.

“And a Jedi who saved him,” Rey counters. “Yes, the most hated man in the galaxy, but you saw there was conflict inside him. You believed that he wasn’t gone, that he could be turned.”

“For many years there was balance. And then I saw… Ben. My nephew,” his voice cracks. “With that mighty Skywalker blood. In my hubris I thought I could train him, I thought I could pass on my strengths.” He looks down, “Leia… Leia trusted me with her son. But by the time I realized I was no match for the darkness rising in him, I was too late.”

Here it is, Rey thinks. The story Kylo wanted me to know. “What happened?” she asks.

Luke turns away from her, he can’t even face her as he explains. “I went to confront him, and he turned on me.” He tells her that Ben pulled the hut down on them both, and believing Luke to be dead, went on to murder most of the students and set the temple ablaze.

“Leia blamed Snoke, but it was me. I failed,” there are tears in his eyes.

It wasn’t Luke’s fault that Kylo went to the dark side. Rey wants to make sure he knows that she needs him. And that he will be a good Master to her. “I need someone to show me my place in all this. And you didn’t fail Kylo. Kylo failed you. I won’t,” Rey states with conviction.

Luke looks to the side… avoiding her gaze.

Rey is walking in the dark across the island back to her hut when she feels it again. The air quiets and she can sense him there.

“I’d rather not do this now.”

“Yeah, me too,” he replies sounding odd.

“Why did you hate your fath”- She turns to him and sees that he’s shirtless looking back at her. Bare, exposed. Without his mask or gloves. Or anything that makes him Kylo Ren… except for pants anyways. And he looks… good. She looks away and then back again, feeling heat on her cheeks, “Do you have something - a cowl or something you could put on?”

He stands there unmoving. Almost as though he’s enjoying how flustered she is.

“Why did you hate your father? Give me an honest answer,” she tries again.

He steps closer.

“You had a father who loved you, he gave a damn about you,” her voice breaks, the tears are coming. How could someone privileged enough to have parents, and not only that, parents that cared - How could he do this when she had never had anyone.

****

Kylo could feel her angry confusion buffeting him like a gale force wind. “I didn’t hate him.”

“Then why?” she asked.

She’s still so fixated on Han. She hasn’t grieved. She needs to know he’s gone. His death should only plague me.

“Why what?” he prompts. She needs to verbalize it if she’s ever going to move on. Looking past the tears streaming down her face he pushes, “Why what? Say it.”

“Why did you”- her voice breaks again, “why did you kill him? I don’t understand.”

“No?” Could she really not relate? He can see the dark thoughts she has about her family. The ones she won’t admit to herself. “Your parents threw you away like garbage.”

“They didn’t,” she protests.

“They did. But you can’t stop needing them. It’s your greatest weakness.” It used to be his weakness. Pining for a faith in him that would never come. Only when he cut loose those ties could he no longer be held back. Only then could he become Kylo Ren. And leave poor unwanted Ben Solo in the past. She needs to do the same.

“Looking for them everywhere. In Han Solo, now in Skywalker.” Skywalker. Has he told her? He wants Rey to know of Luke’s betrayal. To know why he is not a good Master. Why he will let Rey down. Just as he let Ben down. “Did he tell you what happened that night?”

“Yes,” she replies angrily.

He can see the version Luke told her floating in her mind, “No.” Typical Skywalker, changing the story to suit himself. He lets her in to see his memory of the night.

*****

She sees the glow of the green lightsaber Luke held over Ben ready to strike. “He had sensed my power, as he senses yours and he feared it,” Kylo explains. Rey’s heart clenches. She feels the betrayal keenly through the bond. The lack of faith. The pain, knowing that Luke could see the good in his grandfather but not in him. So there must really be no hope for him. And she watched as Ben lit his blue lightsaber, simply defending himself.

“Liar,” she whispers halfheartedly. Seeing Ben’s memories through him impressed upon her the truth.

“Let the past die, kill it if you have to. Thats the only way to become what you are meant to be,” he impresses upon her as he fades. She takes a slow breath, wiping the tears away.

Each time they speak like this, she feels the pull of the dark sea cave more strongly. Kylo says, let the past die. That her parents threw her away like garbage… She needs to know. She is tired of not having the answers.

[radiantanor]

Ramblings about TLJ

Spoilers under the cut, obviously. A lot of this is not positive.

Good things first: There were some pretty cool scenes which I liked. The general atmosphere, planets, ships, costumes and so on, still felt like Star Wars.  

I loved that Leia used the Force in a way that was literally space-sky-walking and can't be denied as „oh she isn't force-sensitive“, and that they showed the connection between her and Luke (like when she woke up from her coma, or their reunion). I liked Hux being ridiculous or the looks the First Order officers exchange about Kylo - I think that is a good way to treat space fascists without making them seem less horrible than they are (ofc they couldn’t do that with Kylo).

The stampede and destruction of the rich war profiteer places on Rose's home planet was very satisfying to see (at least they freed the animals if not the children).

I liked Vice-Admiral Holdo, and BB8, and Finn, and a lot of other characters. Plus, I think most of the actors did great jobs.

Now the less good things:

I feel so upset about Luke Skywalker. I liked Mark Hamill's acting, but everything about the backstory, or his interaction with Rey and Chewie... I mean, how can anyone think that when Luke noticed some darkness in his nephew, his first instinct was to kill him in his sleep? Even with Vader, he first tried talking to his father and only fought when forced to – why would that be different when it comes to his nephew, someone he was much closer to. Especially since his attempt to help  his father worked, so by the time he was teaching Ben he should have been even more convinced of that approach.

And this has been said a lot already, but Luke should not have been running away for so long or being that unkind to Rey. I understand that he thought he had failed and blamed himself, but I am sure that at some point he would have decided to help the Resistance anyway.

The way he acted during the so-called „training“ with Rey was unpleasant to watch for me and not at all like the Luke Skywalker we know.

Yoda looked weird. Also, I disliked the whole scene – Luke not even being self-aware enough to decide whether he really wants to burn the Jedi stuff down or not before making the attempt is ridiculous. Why didn't Yoda come visit Luke earlier, anyway? A lot earlier?

Phasma was, once again, not as cool as promised. Though that does not compare to that way Snoke, set up as being sooo dangerous, just died.

Something about the whole „only the Resistance cares enough/is brave enough to fight the First Order“ thing bothers me, too. Their supposed allies do not try to help them, and apparently the entire Republic military was stationed at Hosnian Prime and destroyed in TFA, which does not make sense – there should at least have been small bases across the galaxy, and obviously they would have had to fight the First Order too.

The lack of some typical Star Wars species like Twileks or Togruta was strange, too.

I really wanted to like Rose, and for most of the film I did. But I just don't understand why she saved Finn at the end, and her reason was weird too – fighting the war by saving what you love instead of destroying what you hate does not make sense, considering that Finn was trying to save the Resistance remnant. At the beginning, she believed in loyalty to the Resistance and called Finn selfish for wanting to save Rey (even though he was not an official Resistance member and therefore not a deserter, so she did not have legal grounds to arrest him). Though I am very happy Finn survived, it was an action completely at odds with the way Rose acted at first. She had no idea that Luke would distract Kylo, or that the others would find another way out, which... might even be enough to make that action treasonous. The kiss pretty much came out of nowhere as well, they literally knew each other for a day or two at most.

I can only assume this was supposed to be character development. But it's the same thing as with Luke, it is based on an illogical premise so it makes no sense and does not feel like actual character development.

I probably would not have minded if Poe had been the one to impulsively save Finn, it seems more like the kind of thing he would do. Admittedly, he was almost too roguish and disobedient in this film – for someone who appears to respect Leia so much, he was refusing to follow her orders or trust that she knew what to do all the time. And the implication that he can be somewhat ruthless (does not seem to care very much about the death toll as long as their goal is achieved) could have been addressed better. I still loved him most of the time. (And I do understand why he thought Holdo was wrong at first, since he did not know what she was doing.)

And there were so many weird things about Finn’s and Rose’s mission: first they attract too much attention and don’t even reach the person they wanted, except that guy might have refused to help them anyway because why should he, then they find a code-breaker who is just as good by chance - I know the Force can work like that but it still feels off somehow.

And of course, I dislike the amount of Reylo. I don't hate that ship as much as I used to, but I still would prefer if it was not hinted at so much. Why does Rey want to help Kylo so much anyway? She goes very quickly from believing that he is a monster to being willing to risk everything to save him, and I don't see why she would be so quick to change her mind, especially since Kylo is not even a family member. Traveling to the First Order was such a bad, stupid decision too. I don't know why Chewbacca and R2 did not have more to say (or do) about that, but then they were generally sidelined in this film.

Or the revelation of Rey's parentage – I might have held out hope that Kylo had been lying, but they literally tore apart the Skywalker legacy lightsaber right after (and after it was set up so much in TFA that feels like being tricked) so it will probably be the truth. Normally, I have zero issues with heroes not needing any special ancestry to be heroes, but in this case I really want Star Wars to have a Skywalker hero or heroine. It's not as if there weren't enough other heroes.

Oh, and I suppose now we know that whatever brainwashing Snoke may have subjected Ben to still let him stab Snoke without much difficulty or Snoke even noticing because he was busy monologuing. Compared to Vader finally deciding to save Luke from the Emperor, that moment really falls flat.

Technology: I'm not sure if tracking ships in hyperspace really is impossible. I mean, you can at least calculate where the ship might have jumped from its vector, or there can be a spy or a tracker on the tracked ship that could be disabled. Also, I don't know how a collision with a ship traveling through hyperspace did not destroy the whole First Order ship. Or why Holdo did not do the hyperspace jump sooner, since she was already planning to die. And can just one person really pilot such a big ship alone? Of course, technology in Star Wars is not required to be „realistic“ anyway.

[remainingso]

Mordred!Kylo AU - Luke training Rey and realizing there is another like Kylo

Part I of AU for context!  (The general gist of it is that, uh, accidental incest=Luke is actually Kylo Ren’s father. Yeah. You have been sufficiently warned.) 

They’re the same.

The thought snakes in one night, sitting by the crackling fire. Rey is prodding the stack of wood with a stick, crouched on her haunches and sweat beading her brow. When she knocks a precarious piece of wood too far and it collapses into the pile, a wall of sparks flash up. The warm brown of her eyes catches the light, for a second, and Luke thinks of another pair of burning eyes, wreathed by flames.

But then she laughs, smile splitting her face, and the moment breaks.

Even made of the same star-stuff, housing the same unbearable, crushing force, there is one crucial difference between them: Rey is not his mistake. She is not his burden to bear.

He knew the truth of her the day she broke Ahch-To.

Already weary of this strange, miraculous, force-sensitive girl, Luke had never thought she could hold such raw strength within her. But the kyber within his old lightsaber—his father’s old lightsaber—sung when it rested in her hands. That should’ve been his first clue.

That bright afternoon, when she swung the blade, the whole stone pillar came shuddering down.

“Don’t let it overwhelm you,” he called into the settling dust, squinting to find her against the rubble. “Don’t try and grab onto it, just let it flow through you.”

He found her, eyes closed, panting, and she was so bright it hurt to look. There, under the brilliant blue shock of sky, Rey breathed out, and cracked the island in two.

“I don’t know if I can teach you any more,” Luke says.

Rey starts. “What?”

He gestured towards that crack now, following it as it slopes up, jagged edges disappearing under a pile of loose rocks. Rey notices and follows his line of sight, then looks down at her hands, dangling before her, and scowls.

Luke finds himself at a loss for words.

“I’m sorry,” Rey says. “I don’t know what that was. I just did what you told me to—I let it all pour out, and I didn’t think about where it would all go, and then…” She looks up and meets his eyes, worrying her lip between her teeth. “I don’t know what I did.”

“That’s why I can’t—” Luke cuts himself off with a shake of his head. “I don’t know what that was either, Rey,” he says. “It’s beyond me.”

“You know better than I do.” There is an unspoken you’re Luke Skywalker, the last Jedi Master—of course you do.

Slowly, Luke shakes his head.

“Please,” Rey says, scrambling to her feet, but sounding smaller.

Luke leans his elbows on his knees, hands clasped before him. The flames dance, fury bright. “I’ve already failed once,” he admits. “The last time I tried to teach someone like you, it didn’t end very well.”

He knew the truth of Ben before he was born, but it took the temple collapsing around the both of them for Luke to truly accept it.

There was nothing but the calm, the two of them meditating alone in the dying light of the sun. The rest of the students were sparring just beside the temple, underneath a precarious outcrop of slate. There had been nothing, and then Luke had stolen that serene moment to break the news: you’re going back, Ben. Your mother misses you. I have to focus on the new students, and I’ve taught you enough.

The truth was that day by day, it grew harder, watching Ben grow out of his baby fat, his face sharpening into something too-familiar. Every morning, Ben had insisted on the two of them, going out to the flat mirror lake for a moment or two, and every morning, all Luke could do was stare down at their reflections in the water and let dread settle in his stomach like sediment.

So when he called Leia, said he had to focus on building an academy, said he was too busy, said Ben missed her, well. Leia understood.

Ben had stared at him, wide eyed and open mouthed, and Luke had put his hand on the (his) boy’s shoulder, and then—

Everything after that was fire. But before the rubble, Luke had coughed, tried to claw himself out of the smoke, and saw only blazing eyes, then the tears.

In the still of night, they both think of the same thing. The same someone.

“Tell me about him,” Rey says, brows furrowed. “How did you try and teach him?”

“Not very well.”

She scoffs. “That’s an understatement, isn’t it?”

Luke raises an eyebrow. “Fair.”

“What was he like? Before?”

At that, he has to give pause. There was so much of all of them in Ben. So much of all their hopes and dreams had ridden on his shoulders, even if some part of Luke knew that was a doomed endeavor from day one.

“Quiet,” he says instead. “He never talked much. Sometimes I wonder if it would’ve turned out better if we made it easier for him to.”

“What’s that mean?”

“I loved him,” Luke says. “We all did. Maybe too much.”

Rey frowns. “How is it possible to love a person too much?”

“I tried to save him from himself,” Luke murmurs. “I thought if I pushed him away, it would be easier on the both of us. I never considered that he might’ve seen that as abandonment.”

At that, Rey falls still and silent. She holds her jaw with an iron edged will. Something flickers, the will of the force matching the ever shifting unpredictable flames, and panic flares briefly in Luke’s chest until she closes her eyes, relaxes her shoulders, and the spark dies. They both breathe a little easier.

Rey tosses the stick back into the fire, then sits down, leaning back on her elbows as she tilts her chin towards the dotted sky. “That’s the worst thing you can do to a person,” she says, voice thick.

“I know.”

“Is that why he left?”

Luke nods.

Rey sprawls her legs out in front of her. “Is that why you want me to leave, too?”

At that, Luke has no words.

She’s not yours, some insidious voice says in the back of his mind. It crackles like the fire. Rey meets his gaze, calmer than she was before, though her mouth is set in a hard line. She looks nothing like Ben. She looks nothing like any of them, her hair a tangled mess about her head, only open curiosity in her eyes.

“I’m not him,” Rey says. Something hard-edged lines her voice. “I’ll never be him. I’m not afraid of this,” she says, thumping her chest. “I just want to understand it.”

Something hotter than anger simmers below the surface of her eyes.

“You never told me where you were from,” Luke says.

Rey furrows her brow. “Does it matter?”

“No,” Luke says, the corner of his mouth lifting. “Call it curiosity.”

Rey’s scowl deepens. Something passes by overhead, some ship or else some doomed star, lights flaring over them and the broken island. Rey tilts her head down, and the light paints one side of her face a slick, glowing yellow.

“I’m from Jakku,” she says. “Somewhere else before that, I’m sure, but Jakku’s all I remember.”

At that, Luke’s face splits into a grin. The irony of it makes his head spin. He used to sit and wonder if Ben would come back to him, prodigal and furious, here to destroy the last of his own legacy without even knowing the truth of his birth. But now, here he is, faced with a desert girl with Ben’s power and his old burning hope, bright but sharp, ready to fight in whatever way she can.

The road ahead of them stretches, long and steeped in dark.

“Alright,” Luke says. He stands, clears the sand out of his old metallic joints, and offers Rey a hand up. “Maybe there’s something left I can teach you.”

She smiles up at him, sunshine in the night. “Thank you,” she says.

They put the fire out. Luke brushes his cold hand over the ashes left over and wonders if this is a second chance, if Rey can control that bright and terrible power within her, if Luke can fix his mistakes—maybe it means the tide can be changed, maybe it means some things aren’t beyond saving.