#Armashok Adaar

[magneticmage]

Excerpts from a Fic I will probably never get around to writing;

Armashok Adaar lifted his mug to his face and let the steam wash over his face for a moment. It was late in the evening and the seven of them were all still gathered around the War Table, discussing plans and reading reports and so many other important things.

For a brief moment, he felt a sense of dream-like surealness wash over him, as if he had entered the Fade once more and become something that he was not.

Except he was this now. A leader, he had always been, but this? This Herald business was nonsense. He wasn't even Andrastian.

Come to think of it, neither were the dwarven smuggler, Naranka Cadash, or the Dalish huntress, Paeriel Lavellan. The only one who even seemed ready to help the Chantry of their own free will was the human noble, Ransley Trevelyan. Well, him and the advisors.

So, how had he gotten roped into all this mess?

"Adaar, are you all right? Is the tea too bland?" Josephine asked as she tucked a loose curl behind her ear, shifting through her notes to find some diplomat's request or other.

He gave a firm grunt as he set it back down, his back aching in his chair, "No."

Upon the brief flicker of concern across Cullen and Joseohine's expressions, he sighed and clarified, "I think I need some fresh air. And a good night's rest. It's late and my back is killing me more than this strange Mark on my hand."

As if to prove his point, the Anchor crackled audibly and all four of them flinched and glanced at the ceiling. As if they could see through the stone and mortar to the great gaping wound in the sky. A wound they would need to close soon.

By Koslun's honored teeth, how had he gotten into this mess?

"I think he's right," Naranka sighed and pushed herself away from the table. "What more can we do today? There will be plenty of work tomorrow and we need to figure out what our next step will be in closing that Breach of yours."

Ransley folded his arms, "It's not just our problem, you know. It affects the dwarves, just as much."

She arched a dark brow at him and Armashok saw her fingers flicker over her dagger sheath for a heartbeat. Old habit. The Carta woman covered the motion by lifting the same hand in an attempt to suppress a yawn. If it was real or staged, Armashok could not tell. But it made him further aware of his own weariness all the same. Her tone was crisp, "You need to sleep, you bellowy hob-knob. If you think I forgot we're all up a nuggalope's asscrack without gloves, then you need to rest and collect your brains."

A quick glance to his left showed the Dalish woman was still absorbed in the correspondence, seeming to prefer to ignore whatever half-hearted bickering was going on around her. .Armashok cleared his throat at the disgusted look on the human's face, drawing their attention. "All right. Points have been made. Anyone up for a break for the night, say aye."

"Aye," Naranka glared at her opposite. The human swore something in a language Armashok did not know-Nevarran, perhaps?-but voiced his agreement. Cullen and Josephine also agreed. The elf and Leliana said nothing, both only glancing up briefly before returning to their work.

Armashok nodded, "All right. That settles it. Off to bed then. See you all in the morning."

As they began to shuffle out, he sighed and lifted his hand to the dragon horn on his chest. He missed his kadan and his little girl.

Perhaps, he could find a way to have them come to Haven, even if only for a day or two.

His wife would certainly be able to help the Commander whip these humans into order. And his daughter might find some small comfort in seeing that her old man was well and still old.

Yes, he would do that.

After some sleep.

[magneticmage]

Fic drabbles;

"Do you ever miss it?"

Armashok Adaar set down his staff as he wearily collapsed onto the log by the evening campfire and turned his horned head towards The Iron Bull, "The Qun or Par Vollen?"

There was a brief pause before he shrugged, "Both."

Armashok scratched at his beard, "Yes and no. Some days more than others."

"Even though you are a saarebas?" The question lacked the malice of most Qunari, the unspoken question of where his araavard was. But it still rattled something sharp in his chest. A reminder of why he had left so many, many years ago.

"Even then," He admitted quietly, "The Qun was about purpose and direction and control. Something I felt I needed for a long time. Before I met my current araavad and wife, Herah. She would take me somewhere secluded and direct me to practice my magic, to hone it like the warrior I once was. That it was my new asala, to replace the blade that was taken from me when my magic showed. At first, I was reluctant and refused. Then, after a mission where we nearly died but were saved by my magic, I began to understand what she'd meant. I was as much a weapon as any other saarebas, any Qunari. The difference was that I could learn to control my own magic, resist my own demons, withouttm the need for a handler."

The Iron Bull frowned, "So, you chose to be Tal-Vashoth then. To abandon the Qun because it tried to control you."

"Not quite." Armashok held up his hand and called fire to his glowing palm. His companion did not flinch away, but he could still read the wary tension in his shoulders. Cullen carried that same tension. It was a fear of mages, of magic. He did not blame them. He had been afraid once, as well.

For a moment, he let the fire dance across various parts of his arms and hands, shaping and sculpting it as a potter would raw clay. He continued speaking as the flames turned brighter, burned hotter under his control, "I have not abandoned the ways of the Qun. Not truly. I have only realized it has not served its intended purpose for me. I do believe that all things and people require guidance and something to follow, some rules to adhere to, some thing important enough to work towards for themselves-even if that is for the benefit of others. That it can become their asala. Their soul. If they want."

The Iron Bull folded his arms, "So, you think you can bend the Qun to serve your needs? How is that different than the Chantry?"

"We are all flawed mortals, Bull." He shrugged, "Organizations are as fallible as their leaders and their followers. I admire the Qun for what it can be; purpose, dedication, humility. I simply realized that I could not work within the confines set by those who had founded it as it is now. I chose to be a person in a room of people who did not wish to see me as such. I chose to value the family and love I had found within it and carry that faith beyond its reach."

The Iron Bull was quiet for a moment, seeming to take these words into consideration. What went through his head, Armashok could not say. But he was drawing comparisons to his own life, if the intense stare he gave Krem said anything.

He set a hand on his fellow qunari's shoulder, "You can honor the beliefs of the Qun and not be a member of the Qunari as a country. You can be a person in a room of people who say you are nothing more than a weapon. Think on it, but know that you will always have my help no matter the nature of the request."

Bull gave a laugh, "You finally decided to make a move on me, Boss? Gotta say I didn't expect it."

Armashok shook his head and gently headbutted him, "Tempting as you are, my handsome fellow Qunari, I am happily married. Perhaps, another time, should she ever give me permission."

He nodded and offered a drink. Armashok took it. Raising it up, he declared, "Now to drink away all those annoying existential questions for the evening, aye? Tomorrow, we fight a dragon and celebrate our victory!"

"Cheers to that," The Iron Bull responded, seemingly relieved at the change of topic.

So they drank and chatted of other things-old battles, the memories of home, their shared love of bloodshed and dragons-well into the night. When they finally headed to their tents-Armashok to his with his daughter, Kara, and Bull to his with Dorian and Pyrmar Cadash-the only ones still awake were Solas and Paeriel, who had moved off for some privacy in the early dawn hours.

Months later, even despite the forced choice of his people, The Iron Bull stood resolute in his new purpose, his new family. Armashok had managed to bolster Krem and the other mercenaries with the aid of the rest of their inner circle-thus securing the alliance with the Qunari and saving the Chargers, but it took some quiet affirmations after for Armashok to fully realize the effect his words had left on his companion.

He was surprised once again, years later, when The Iron Bull-Hisraad no longer-stoof firm against the Dalatrass' orders. He was loyal to his family of Chargers and lovers in Dorian and Pyrmar. He had found his new purpose; A Qunari at heart despite the brand of Tal-Vashoth.

Armashok Adaar could only smile as he embraced his brother-in-arms before they parted for Tevinter.

[magneticmage]

Unwritten Fic Excerpts

Tooootally not procrastinating on properly writing.

Under cut for length

Ransley Trevelyan stared at the map of Skyhold in front of him. This fortress was....huge. and well-built to have lasted through so many Ages and hands. He had the faintest feeling that the Inquisition would only be one of the many rulers to stay here for a time, not the last.

Still, there was still much work to be done.

"The gardens would be lovely for a Chantry chapel," He remarked, fingers skimming that section of the map.

"Don't we have enough Chantry idolatry everywhere?" Paeriel Lavellan remarked. Her temper was rather sour towards him on the best of days it seemed, and the various discussions of how to rebuild the fortress were quickly proving to be drawing towards yet another face-off between them.

Lucky for them, Armashok Adaar and Naranka Cadash held more level heads.

Naranka set her tankard of dwarven ale down, "Look, we need to get something done today. It's been four hours of the two of you bickering back and forth. I'm tired of it."

Armashok sighed and scratched the chipped base of his right horn. The scars along his neck and face made his already towering physique even more intimidating. His voice was calm and collected, "Paeriel has a point though. Not all follow the Chantry's teachings nor that if their Maker and his Bride, Andraste. The Dalish have their Creators, the Avvar their gods, the Dwarves their Stone, and my people have the Qun."

"The Qun that brainwashed people." Ransley scowled, "That attacked Kirkwall and Ostwick not too long ago."

"How long ago was the last time the elves were killed by humans?" Paeriel's green eyes flashed towards the human noble faster than her arrows, "Oh, wait, it hasn't even been a year."

Naranka sighed and let her chin slump into her hand, "Can we get past the whole 'your people killed my people in whatever conflict in whatever year slash event', please? The Inquisition is supposed to be a show of unity against Cory-piss-pants and if we can't all pretend to agree agree get along, how are we going to expect our people to? Haven taught us to expect disaster. Skyhold is a chance to show that preparation and strength. Let's not squander it."

The human and elf fell silent and looked away from each other, appropriately chagrined. Damn Carta thug had a point. Ex-Carta, Ransley tried to remind himself. She was right. Theda was falling apart because of old grudges and they would need to put their own aside in order to do what was needed for the good of everyone.

He scrubbed at his face, trying to scrape off the frown that has etched itself into his brow the past few days, "Okay. What do you suggest?"

"We expand the eastern gardens and their greenhouses a bit to allow a greater number of plants. In addition to the amount we all keep in our rooms and have hanging around the halls, it should be enough for whatever we need. It might cut into our supplies for the kitchen but I'm fairly sure we can make the revenue up in some other way," Naranka remarked. Her dark eyes turned to Paeriel, "That satisfies your garden request, yes?"

"I suppose." She remarked, "It's smaller than the western area, but it is closer to my rooms so that should be enough."

"As for Ransley wanting a Chantry chapel, I can't say I'm enthused about it either." Naranka paused and took a long draught of her drink and wiped her mouth on her sleeve, "But it does pacify quite a few complaints we've already had, I suppose."

"And raises others." Ransley rolled his eyes to the stack of letters to the left. All demands for equal representation. It wasn't that he didn't approve of all the changes. It was just...so very different from what he was used to that it made him uncomfortable. Perhaps...that was why the others acted the way they did? They all missed home as much as he did and wanted to bring a piece of it with them. He would need to think harder on this. Perhaps Naranka's initial assessment that he was used to the world making way for him had some merit.

"We could make it a multi-faith chapel of sorts. A place for religious debate and ethics and philosophy. We could put a lyrium-infused statue of a Paragon or two in the garden main path, alongside the statue of Andraste that I saw someone bringing in the other day. We could have some trees and wayshrines and such for the Qunari and Dalish. It might take some work getting everything to fit and flow together but I'm sure Josephine could find a group of people to handle it. She's not failed us yet. " Armashok pressed his thumb into the soft center of his palm and rubbed small circles. The Anchor on their hands flared irritably under the abrupt pressure before it settled. "Will that do?"

"Yes." Ransley combed his fingers through his hair, "So, what say we take a lunch break and then move on to the next section? The outer walls, right?"

"No. No more breaks." Naranka slammed her hands down on the war table. Armashok's drink fell of the table and shattered, scattering glass across the floor. Luckily Ransley managed to save both the Dwarf and his own drinks from ruining the maps and papers with their contents. A quick glance across saw Paeriel setting down her tea on a nearby seat.

"Bit much, don't you think?"He quipped.

That earned him a frustrated glare, "I'm sorry, Lord Trevelyan, but don't you think running off to smooch Cassandra every four hours is a 'bit much'?"

He felt heat fold across his cheeks and stammered out a protest that sounded weak even to his own ears. Armashok rubbed his temple, "We can break after we get this last section done for today. Now the outer walls or the aqueducts? What do we repair first?"

"The aqueducts will provide fresh water for us through its use of fire runes and the ice run off from melting the snow banks. I'm not sure if the indoor plumbing has held up all these years, though," Naranka said, pulling out the relevant files.

"It has in most places. We'll still need to bring in either a dwarven or Tevinter architect to double check the quality though," Ransley said. He gestured at one of the areas marked in red, "It'll be more costly to repair and it will delay us fixing the outer walls on time if we are attacked during then, though."

Paeriel grimaced, her own hand reaching for the Anchor as another minor pulse raced through them, "Honestly, I would much rather have clean drinking water with working plumbing than working outer walls at the moment."

"Even after what happened at Haven?" Naranka's brow rose, "You have to be kidding me, Pae! You don't let the spawn in through a crackand the wonder why you have an ogre breathing down your neck!"

Armashok scratched at his horns again, "Safety is more important right now. We can fix the water issue once we get more established. For now, we need to make sure our people feel safe after Haven's destruction."

Paeriel sighed and leaned forward on her hands, "If I can call in a few favors and have someone work on it so long as they get food and shelter, it should be fine, right?"

Ransley arched a brow, "What kind of contacts do you have, Lavellan?"

"Not exactly my favorite people," She looked away as if ashamed. One more mystery to this woman. No wonder her and Solas got along so well. The two of them seemed wrapped up in their own world of ancient secrets and old ties. How someone so young managed to have so many secrets was beyond him.

"These people...any rules for hiring them? What's the catch?" Naranka folded her arms.

Paeriel tossed her head back and laughed, "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"Try me."

She sighed and spread her hands to either side, "I ran with a group of vengeance hunters called the Knives of Plenty for a time."

"Isn't that the group of former city elves that used the sewers and alleys and other dark places to attack and kill human nobles for abusing their servants?" Armashok asked, "Their services could be bought, but only if you could prove that they were hurting their people. Really worth the coin for some info they could get, though. If memory serves me right."

Paeriel nodded, "Yes. They were primarily city elves, but there were disillusioned Dalish and elven mages seeking Refuge. They even took in elf-blooded humans who shared their cause, as they as as much elven as they are human."

Ransley held up his hands, "Wait a second here! You want us to enlist terrorists to fix our plumbing? And you were one of them? They killed people like us!"

The three of nonhumans exchanged a look between themselves, as if silently daring each other. Naranka cleared her throat, "I should point out, they only targeted human people like you. But you haven't harmed any elves, have you, Ransley?"

"Of course not!" He frowned at them, "This still doesn't explain how they are going to fix the pipes, though."

Paeriel rolled her eyes, "Many of them used to have regular jobs before they were pushed too far. More than half of them worked in tight quarters and bad conditions. This will be a lot safer than their old jobs, they get food and shelter, and a place to feel accepted. We get our pipes and our walls fixed. It's a win-win."

"Plus, we get some good PR for 'reforming crimminals'," Armashok chuckled with his hands making gestures of sarcasm, "How does this go bad?"

"Let's just say I had a rough break with their leader when I left and they will need a lot of convincing to join up." Paeriel leaned forward into her knuckles and looked at the table.

Naranka scratched her head, but nodded her agreement, "Who here doesn't have a dark history of some kind?"

Ransley sighed and looked over at the Dalish. Perhaps, it was time to put grudges aside and try and open up the sheltered walls he had lived in. These three could help him move past the echo chamber he had grown up in. He cleared his throat and set the cups in his hands down, "Tell us about it."

[magneticmage]

Quiz Meme; OC-style

I was tagged by @rozhevisny to take this quiz.

I also ended up doing a number of my OCs. They are under the cut for length.

I am tagging @awellboiledicicle @mikkeneko @changeling-fae @higheverweave @yusukesmomjeans @dalishious and @draxen1123 but don't feel pressured to do so if you don't wanna! It's all for fun.

(Inquisitors)

Paeriel Lavellan="You're choking on how much you have to try". Accurate by the time of Inquisition (specifically around Skyhold) as Paeriel very much embodies the virtue of suledin. She can handle the amount she's dealt with but it is still a burden and she worries about how it will affect others if she slips and drops under the weight. She doesn't want more harm to come to innocents and those who are already struggling under their own burdens (mages, dwarves, elves, even the templars to some degree), and yet it is a fight that continues on and on seeming without end. Just as Solas walks his path to break the systems oppressing people, she tries to work within those same systems to better chances for those who need it.

Armashok Adaar="You were meant to". Accurate prior to his joining the Inquisition. He spent so much of his life struggling to find his place as everyone told him what to be; silent, obediant, a weapon to be protected against. He chafed and struggled to find comfort in it and yet he ultimately realized that he was his own person. No one could tell him who and what he was or was meant to be, not even his wife. So he chose for himself; To be Armashok Adaar.

Ransley Trevelyn="This isn't enough for you" Also accurate for pre-Inquisition Ransley, as he balked against his family expectations. They wanted him to marry a nice noblewoman of status and wealth. He courted them but couldn't quite bite the bullet as something about them just lacked....something. Even when he met his lover, he struggled against the fact that they had to be discreet for her reputation as a Knight-Divine. His family demanded he become a Templar, he decided the Seekers would be a better use of his talents. Always when he was told something, his innate ambition would push him for more and better things. While he can give up things as needed, he dislikes it. That last part is something he struggles with-and notably fails during Trespasser-post-Inquisition. This is a trait that Josephine can understand, though like their lover Cassandra, she tempers it in herself and him with patience.

Naranka Cadash="Because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow" Pfft. Yeah, this is very much her. She seeks redemption just as badly as Paeriel does for Solas, just as badly as Blackwell-her love interest-does.

(Inner Circle)

Kara Adaar="Because you cannot hold freedom". Very true. She's seen what freedom has cost her parents to give her a better life and plans to make the most of hers. That desire to enjoy life is shared with Sera. The desire to understand the world through the lens of ensuring that freedom for others is something she shares with Dagna.

Emilyse Trevelyan="You swallow pain and fold around it" Yikes. This is accurate to her time in the Circle, however. She spent much of her time trying to be a "good" mage, despite a number of abuses by the Templars and the Chantry. It was only when her brother visited her during his training as a recruit that some of those abuses came to light and she was brought to the Circle in Ostwick, closer to home and with the newly added bribes to ensure her safety, she did much better. However, this newfound life did not for too long as the Rebellion broke out and she was left adrift for a time before making her way with some other refugees to the Conclave at Haven. She was nervous about so many Templars, but eventually found solace and peace with Cullen as they each began to heal over their own traumas of their respective sides, and together as they began a family shortly after Trespasser.

Samrel Lavellan="because you cannot hold freedom" Interesting. He's actually one of my simplest OCs; a simple life with his clan and husband, First to the Keeper and cousin to Paeriel, is all he wants. Unlike some of my other Dalish OCs, he hasn't faced quite the same level of hardship and loss, and though he does mourn the loss of his clan, he seeks to rebuild it alongside his husband and the few survivors that managed to escape the humans' blades. So perhaps that defiance of the losses inflicted harkens back to the Dale's and the elves' refusal to submit to the Alienages, by simply standing up and saying "No, you cannot silence us" is enough? That could be a type of freedom and there is power in that refusal. Thoughts to consider more later.

Pyrmar Cadash="This isn't enough for you". Oh that's interesting. Pyrmar is one of those characters that seems super simple (ex-surfacer Carta bruiser with a notable penchant for leadership as a Champion) and, for the most part, he is. He likes drink and fun as much as any other mercenary like the Chargers. But, like Dorian, he sometimes feels inadequate in some way. As if he is meant for more; to be and do more. Most notably for basic respect and care, something his upbringing in the cutthroat nature of the Carta was missing. Dorian shows him that he is capable of love and being loved and The Iron Bull gives him the respect and belonging he lacked previously. While he can still fall orey to his baser nature at times, his heart as grown much over the years and so it becomes less common to "want more" as he used to.

(Last Court)

Aurore de Serault="Because you have made mistakes you can't swallow" Ooo. She does carry some lingering guilt and grief over her late husband's death at the hands of the Game. She struggles with the Orlesian court at times, and much prefers solitude and peaceful quiet to gossipy ballrooms and noble Lords and ladies demanding a dance, a bonding point for her and her love interests of The Silent Huntsman and the Elegant Abbess. However, it's not that she's unskilled in the Game; in fact, she's quite good at it. She simply prefers simplicity to more complex machinations. All that said, she does regret the ferocity with which she holds grudges; she had gone on to murder the entire families of those individuals responsible for her husband's death.

Marcel de Serault="You swallow pain and fold around it". Hmmm. Not sure of this one. Marcel divorced his wife to pursue a cloistered and scholarly life in pursuit of knowledge (he was once a Chevalier). Eventually he began to crave the adventure of the Game again, which is how he fell for The Wayward Bard and the Dashing Outlaw. Again, not too sure but it's interesting. Perhaps he simply internalized his losses and pain?

(Hawkes)

Knight-Commander Jasper Hawke of Kirkwall="because you've made mistakes you can't swallow" Oh cool! Jasper watches his younger siblings-three of his fellow quadrupled and Carver- go off into the Deep Roads expedition. He made the decision to stay behind to protect Bethany and their mother in case things went south. Despite assurances from his departing siblings, things did go south. After being pissed at Batrand, he sighed and went to work for the Templars. Shortly thereafter, despite his best efforts, Bethany was caught by Templars and taken to the Circle. Jasper did what he could to protect and shield his sister from the worst abuses of the Templars under Meredith's command, no matter the personal costs and enmity it earned him from his siblings and companions. It even ended his relationship with Anders around the beginning of Act 2. After Meredith was defeated, he worked with Cullen to try and reform the Templars and rebuild Kirkwall post-Chantry boom. His efforts were strained once red lyrics began to show up and corrupt his fellow templars. Despite narrowly avoiding being swept into the group while infiltrating it to gather intel, he succeeded in driving them out. When Cullen left for the Inquisition, he stepped up to continue reforming the Templars for protecting the mages. While he originally balked at the pro-mage decisions of the Inquisition, he ultimately agreed that the Chantry had abused all of its charges-mages and templars both. He began to reshape the Templars under his command to fit in line with the changing world; a choice to take lyrium, and a recovery and rehabilitation plan set in stone for all members who wished to leave, new rules and regulations in place to protect the rights and dignity of both mages and Templars, slowly making them a secular force beyond the Chantry but under the control of Vivenne's newly reformed Circle of Magi perhaps. He does what he believes to be right and for the best of his family, even if they dislike his decisions. A trait he no doubt picked up from his mother.

Lord Gray Hawke of House Amell="You swallow pain and fold around it" This is fitting for Lord Amell. While Jasper and Violet always held loft goals to pursue and Skye simply wanted to go and see the world for all it was, Gray preferred to remain at home and tend to their family. He is the one most connected to the Amell legacy rather than the Hawke self-made determination. That's not to say it isn't there; he's more than willing to help others and make something of himself, but it comes back to wanting to appease and help his family in whatever ways he could. He pines for Anders for a great deal of time, but doesn't make a move due to either Jasper dating the mage or simply not wanting to be a rebound for his brother. In the end, however, Anders surprises him (perhaps nudged on by Skye and Violet) by initiating a kiss and the two quickly develop into a stable relationship. He is even willing to leave all he'd built to go on the run with Anders and further aid him in his cause. Gray is just a cutie who wants a simple meal and a nice husband. If he gets to watch Anders shoot lightning at fools, well, who is he to laugh?

Viscountess Skye Hawke="Because you cannot hold freedom". Accurate. Skye loves her freedom. While she is certainly ambitious, it often comes down to more power means more freedom. She rules as Viscountess of Kirkwall for a time until abdicating in favor of Varric so she can pursue Tallis across the seas, but also to simply go back to adventuring and exploring. While she does not care for the Qun and its Qunari, she cares about people and her family most of all. It is one of the few tethers she did not choose but it is the one she keeps above all others. After all, even the Sky must touch the earth at some point just as a Hawk must return to its nest to rest and tend its young.

Champion Violet Hawke of Kirkwall="Because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow". Fitting given that Violet is both a blood-mage (also a spirit-healer and force-mage) and extremely pro-mage freedom, and her choices often led her to conflict with Jasper due to their views and lives. She has only ever wanted to be free to live her life as she chooses, with is how she fell for Isabela. She fell for Fenris because she's a bleeding heart who wants to help everyone as much as she can. Kirkwall left its mark on her and she's struggling to do better than what she views as a failure due to her diplomatic nature in the name of mage freedom by the time the Inquisition comes around. While just as driven by the cause for equality as Anders, she often privately struggled with her mother's death among the many other revelations and choices of her family, fearing the loss of all she called dear. Luckily Fenris and Isabela returned to her and they made a pact to live well on the seas after everything had settled down and Champion Hawke was no longer needed.

(Awakening)

Senior Warden Dion Caron="This isn't enough for you" Okay. So, Dion joined the Wardens to escape the Templars (p.s. it didn't work) and his adopted sister Victoire-Ainsley was already joining and he had promised to protect her for their parents. He's happily married to Garam and spends much of his time training recruits and fostering camaderie in the ranks of the Wardens. What more could he want? Perhaps it is nothing and the doubt is simply there as is human nature, perhaps he frets about his dwindling time in the world before his Calling, perhaps he does want more. Who can say?

Senior Warden/Warden-Constabke Victoire-Ainsley Caron of Orlais="This isn't enough for you" Pfft. Victoire-Ainsley's ambition to make a name for herself and her family (she came from a long line of Chevaliers) nearly cost her her life and resulted in her father's death. Her mother adopted an orphan boy-Dion-in the hopes it would curb some of her darker tendencies. It partially succeeded. While she did not go as far as she'd once been willing, she still acted ruthlessly and this earned her quite the name in the Game for a time. However, her fall from grace was just as bloody as her rise, and she was only spared by the intervention of the Wardens' Conscription. She lost a great deal and was now forever barred from reclaiming it. She acted out for a time and was surprised when the Wardens allowed-encouraged even-it. However the death of her husband to save them during a nasty skirmish against a powerful broodmother she'd led them against resulted in a mission successful but at a cost she hadn't wanted to pay; only her, Dion, Garam, and I senna made it out alive. Since then, she had been working towards redeeming herself, opening up to the criticism and vulnerability she'd been so afraid of, much like Loghain is when he is sent to Orlais. And so while her pride demands more of her, she focuses instead on what she can provide and tries to bite back the bile this causes. After all, this is for the best and that is enough. Right?

Senior Warden Isenna Andras="You were meant to" Isenna lived first under the Orlesian cruelty in the Alienate and then the Templars' in the Circle. It is no wonder she fights to carve a name for herself in history, to make herself her own, to be what she was never meant to even dream of. She wants to be a hero but struggles against her own inner nature to survive. She is driven by the conflict of selflessness and self-preservation. Perhaps Mhairi's idealism is enough to tip the scales for her.

Senior Warden Garam Kader="Because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow" Accurate. He joined the Wardens after passing off the wrong Carta Boss and then spent years helping Victoire-Ainsley and her brother grow their ambition and then....his unit died beyond the four of them. And all the glamor of the Wardens fell away and he realized just how far some would go and he began to wait for them to step back, hoping they would step back. Victoire-Ainsley and Dion and Isenna did. He did. But the Clarel didn't. He hopes Loughlin will do better as the Warden-Commander of Orlais. He knows he will do better and he knows his husband, Dion, will.

(Wardens)

Warden-Commander Lynera Mahariel of Fereldan="You were meant to" Ouch my heart. Lynera lost Tamlen and never quite recovered. She was forced into a Warden and then into leading the party as the Hero of Fereldan and then into the role of Warden-Commander/Arlessa of Amaranthine and she did it. She took all the pain and hurt and losses over the years, the Taint and its horrors and its strength sapping, the politics and hard decisions; she took it all and she did it. She did what was needed, became what a Grey Warden Commander and hero was meant to be. She can't even say she regrets becoming a Warden anymore as its become so central to her identity now, only mourns the things and people she's lost to get there. I think Sten-excuse me-the Arishok understands this. Perhaps that is why they both hope to never meet on a battlefield unless they are on the same side again.

Warden Isemaya Tabris="You swallow pain and fold around it" Okay that's like SUPER interesting. See, Isemaya learned about the injustices elves face early in life. It cost her her mother's life and very nearly her twin brother's as well, after all. She became a warrior to protect them (her family, her community, her home) and she was good at it. But then she saw a glimpse of a different life with Nelaros, one where she might be happy simply letting someone else deal with all the fighting and clawing and exhaustion. She wanted it, she realized, she wanted it very much. But then she lost him and Shianni was hurt and she was hurt and Vaughn was dead and the humans were so angry. She geared up to protect her people again, to be the brave warrior like her mother before her. And then....Duncan Conscripted her. She was forced from her home, alive and angry and proud, and so she expanded her family to her companions. Then Zevran tried to kill them and they let him live and she watched him like a hawk and saw the same longing for a life, for more in the absence of loss, in him. She helped him heal and learn to live again and he helped her set down her weapons and her anger for a time and then the times became more frequent and they grew closer. She told him she loved him in the brisk Haven air and he gave her a golden earring to match the old and blood-stained wedding band she still wore, and she had found peace. She continued with the Wardens, with helping him take down the Crows, with searching for a cure so they could have more time. She took her pain but instead of weaponizing it like Lynera and others did, she learned to let it go and continue on. She learned to live in spite of, not because of, her pain.

Arcane Advisor Catriona Surana of Fereldan= "Because you have made mistakes you cannot swalllow" Oof. This is definitely Catriona during Origins. Her decisions to betray Jowan, to use blood magic at Ostagar and then to continue to practice and study it despite the stigma it holds, the merging with Compassion to save Cale, to give up her dreams of marriage and freedom and let Alistair marry Anora for the good of Fereldan and again when Leliana went on to become the Left Hand of the Divine and then again as the Divine Victoria...she makes a lot of mistakes and the consequences haunt her for a very long time. While she does manage to find some good in them, or at least simply makes peace with them, they still color how she becomes in 2 and Inquisition and beyond.

Warden Cale Amell=

Teryn Fion Cousland of Gwaren=

Paragon Prince Barran Aeducan=

Warden Paragon Tatha Brosca=

(Origins)

First/Keeper Vireth Mahariel=

"Dark Wolf" Elthorn Tabris=

"Stormcaller" Alaros Surana=

Lord Azul Amell=

Lady "Nightshade" Raven Amell=

Lord Carmine Amell=

Lord Reed Amell=

Lady Marigold Amell=

Captain "Highever Spitfire" Aelynne Cousland=

Princess and Orzammar Commander Valda Aeducan=

(Canon Solo Shepard)

Commander and Spectre Annette Shepard=

(The Sibling Shepards Canon)

Spectre Riley Shepard=

Spectre/XO Roscoe "Ros" Shepard=

Spectre/Commander Joanna "Jo" Shepard=

(Shepard Cousins)

Angelus "Angel" Shepard=

Elliot "El" Shepard=

Jaden "Jay" Shepard=

Alexandra "Alex" Shepard=

Kristopher "Kris" Shepard=

Clover "Clove" Shepard=

(Starship Ryders Canon)

Pathfinder Lucas "Luke" Ryder=

Pathfinder Rebecca "Becca" Ryder=

Pathfinder Shiloh "Shy" Ryder=

Pathfinder Evander "Evan" Ryder=

Pathfinder Asher "Ash" Ryder=

(Baldur's Gate)

Cei Gloomdraft=

Faenerys Elendir=

"Sable Shades" Risaeder Rosandoral=

Saga "Muse" Musehart=

Lyr(e/a/an) Lovemoor=

Rune Mistsea=

Lucine Mistsea=

Roan Roarke=