#Anyways. Jade Empire has like. Both moments in the throne room feel like the end. And its just soooo good

[eyepatchdate]

i want a game like jade empire again

[beaglesinbowties]

“They do exist!” Thursday is being kicked off with Mulan/Regina. Someone asked for Mulan/Anyone, and so of course I immediately thought of one of my other favorite Once characters. It's not very canon compliant, but canon sucks anyway. I hope you enjoy it!

The day after Mulan crosses the border, she isn’t sure what to expect. She’s heard the rumors, of course. She hadn’t decided to come here lightly.

The outlying villages to the kingdom certainly don’t speak favorably of the queen; however it’s their quality of life that had makes Mulan scrutinize their demeanor and words.

The land is prosperous, despite (or because of?) their supposedly Evil Queen.

Mulan grits her teeth as she considers the implications. She, herself, had done much for her own land, only to be exiled at the whims of court. It hadn’t mattered what she’d done, what she’d sacrificed - what she’d been willing to sacrifice for her people.

The betrayal still aches, but she can’t help but wish her old land well.

She’s wandered far, and thought she almost found home many times before. It has never worked out, though she’s made her share of friends along the way.

Mulan decides to make her way slowly through the land to its heart; the capital city and the castle that houses the queen, herself. The journey takes weeks, but Mulan doesn’t mind.

The castle stands out amid the bustling city, its black stones making the tall spires seem like claws reaching out to tear at the sky. Still, its gates are open and the guards stand at stiff attention. They seem alert, though dismissive of the general populace trickling in and out to engage in the open market or seek a favor from the queen.

Open court has never been Mulan’s favorite (she has to swallow against the bitter taste that lingers in the back of her throat) but she spends several days cloaked and observing.

After three days she thinks, maybe, she understands why the monarch has earned the title of ‘evil’ in the seven kingdoms.

“Eyewitness accounts all confirm your son’s presence at the scene. Are you saying the five witnesses are lying?” The queen is full of disdain, for the court or the subject, Mulan isn’t sure.

The old woman grips her apron, worrying it between her hands as the lines of her face seem to deepen. “Yes, Yer Majesty.”

“This is an outrage, your Majesty!” one of the people standing across from the old woman, a tall man with broad shoulders, claims. “An affront to our character!”

The queen’s attention travels between the two of them, eyes half lidded as she contemplates the matter. She rises quite suddenly, her dark nails digging into the arms of her throne.

Queen Regina cuts an impressive figure in her black jewel-studded gown, its train sweeping almost ominously as she descends the steps. She paces between the group and the old woman respectively, a playful smile tugging at her lips. “There are a few ways to discern the truth, of course. However, I’ve already had a long day and my patience has worn thin.”

She stops in front of the man that had spoken, her eyelashes fluttering down almost coquettishly. The queen raises a hand to brush delicately over the man’s shoulder - but all of a sudden her friendly expression becomes tinged with anger, and she’s shoving her hand into his chest and tugging his heart free.

The queen seems delighted at the sight of it; equal parts vibrant red and black cloudy masses. “Oh, would you look at that? Well, I’d hate to judge a book by its cover.” Her smile, if anything, is wicked. “Tell me the truth; did her son commit this crime?”

The perspiration gathers and begins to fall as the man hesitates. It’s obvious he’s trying to fight answering, but eventually a pained “no” passes his lips.

Queen Regina rolls her eyes and shoves the heart back into his chest, turning and waving a negligent hand. “Have this woman’s son released.” She pauses as she retakes her seat, again seeming contemplative. “And have all five of the witnesses executed. To perjure yourself to your Queen is treason.”

The old woman who’d presented her case looks pleased for only the first part, a look of horror overtaking her face. Her chin wobbles, but she wisely only murmurs a quiet “Thank you, Yer Majesty” that’s nearly drowned out by the outcry from the group being taken into custody by guards.

It’s then that Mulan decides to make her pledge. She doesn’t see evil in the queen’s actions. The punishments in her own land tend to be equally harsh. Mulan can only imagine that, much like it had been when she’d commanded a great portion of the Emperor’s army, the queen is exceptionally strict out of necessity. Even with three of the seven kingdoms being ruled by a queen, many still buck at the thought of being commanded by a woman.

Mulan isn’t made for any of the softer kingdoms which allow true murderers and worse free under special conditions. Though the Jade empire is far, perhaps she can find a measure of home here.

The next day at open court, she waits her turn patiently.

The time comes when the chamberlain shouts “Next!” and it’s Mulan that’s stepping forward.

“Your Majesty,” Mulan says as she sweeps forward and kneels at the foot of the dais. A quick tug and flick has her cloak removed and then her sword is pressed point down into hard black stone before her. “I have come to pledge my sword to your service.”

She doesn’t look up out of respect, instead maintaining her pose.

“Your sword? How ever did you even manage to get it past my guards?” It’s difficult to say whether the queen is enraged or amused, her inflection lending to both.

“I could not say, Your Majesty. They are alert, but perhaps not to soft faces like mine. Will you accept my pledge?”

There’s the sound of shifting cloth and the clicking of heels, and then Mulan’s staring at the vibrant crimson hem of the queen’s dress.

She doesn’t move when she feels the pressure of the queen’s fingertips tracing detail of her armor, but then the hand finds its way to her chin and her head is forced upward. She doesn’t fight the movement, allowing her eyes to meet the queen’s though the angle is a little too sharp for comfort.

The queen is as beautiful as she is deadly, Mulan thinks. Her life could be forfeit for daring to bare a sword in the queen’s presence.

The queen stares at her for long moments, her thumb rubbing Mulan’s chin thoughtfully. Her full crimson lips slowly upturn. “I accept your pledge. After open court has ended, you will repeat the proper vows and you will be admitted into my personal guard.”

“As Your Majesty wishes,” Mulan replies, somewhat entranced by the quick flicker of emotion over her new monarch’s face.

“Rise.”

Mulan quickly obeys.

Queen Regina reaches out and tugs at the ends of Mulan's long hair. “Your first duty will be to oversee the flogging of every guard you passed on your way here.”

“As you say, Your Majesty.” Mulan dips into a respectful bow.

The queen hums, once again reaching out to play with the ends of Mulan’s hair. “Mm, yes. I think I’ll quite like having you around.”

Though Mulan prides herself on self control, the thrill that tickles down her spine is undeniable.

For a moment she pictures gasping crimson lips and dark-tipped nails digging into her back, but she shakes the image away. Open court isn't finished for the day.

Mulan can’t be sure if it’s her imagination or not, but she feels the heat of the queen’s gaze follow her as she settles back to wait at the edge of the crowd.

Some time later when the queen is declaring open court finished for the week and their eyes lock, Mulan knows that it wasn’t her imagination. Even now the monarch’s gaze follows her in a dangerous way, and when she’s repeating the vows that bind her life to Queen Regina’s, it feels as if the monarch’s very eyes are burning against her skin.

“Once your duties here are finished,” the queen says as Mulan stands, “you may seek out your new quarters with the captain of the guard. If you have any questions, someone may direct you to my chambers.”

Mulan bites the inside of her cheek and nods, tasting blood as she watches the queen retire from the room. There are many questions she’d like to pose to the queen, but Mulan’s determined to remain the utmost professional in her new post.

She’s just not certain how long that professionalism will last in the face of Queen Regina’s very keen presence.

“Let fate take me where it may,” she mutters under her breath.

[notapaladin]

harmonic orchestra gen fills (pt 2)

But Wait There’s More!! also on AO3, etc etc

-

1 (teomitl – victory song)

They cheer louder than they ever did for his brothers, and that should please him; he's certainly a greater Emperor than both of them put together, adding new territories to the Empire with every campaign. It does please him, but…

But instead he looks over the heads of his war council and out into the crowd below, where his wife and Acatl are standing, and he feels his other brother-in-law Neutemoc's presence solid as a wall in the army behind him. They are silent, but he doesn't need them to sing his praises. He can see it in their faces, in Mihmatini's little nod and Acatl's soft smile at seeing him unhurt and victorious.

He is Emperor, and the priests and warriors sing their victory songs for him—but his greatest accomplishment is to look at his family and know he's made them proud.

-

2 (acatl – are you gonna eat that?)

There are eyes on him. He makes a show of ignoring them, instead picking at the remains of his peppers and deliberately ignoring the honey-roasted agave worms that are his usual favorite snack. He isn't that hungry anymore, anyway.

One bite. Another. He keeps his eyes on his plate, not looking to either side. Any minute now…

A small hand tugs at his cloak, and a sweet and desperate-sounding voice that's clearly doing its best to sound polite pipes up, "Uncle Acatl, are you going to eat those?"

He chuckles and slides the rest of the plate over to his niece. "All yours."

-

3 (teomitl – water lilies)

Teomitl's patron goddess is She of the Jade Skirt, she who reigns over lakes and rivers and streams, and even though he can hear Acatl's and Mihmatini's voices in his head chiding him for his recklessness, it would be a terrible shame if he didn't sometimes take advantage of that fact. He can still drown, of course, so he has to come up for air sometimes, but that doesn't stop him.

He swims among the stems of water lilies like an otter, like the ahuitzotls that are his formal name, and marvels at how something so beautiful can come from mud.

-

4 (nezahual – jade green and ruby red)

There is jade in his ears and at his fingers, garlands of crimson flowers and coral around his neck, and Nezahual should be pleased. After all, is he not Revered Speaker of Texcoco? Is he not ruler of all he surveys? (Well, all he is presently surveying, at any rate—his fellow rules of Tenochtitlan and Tlacopan likely would not be impressed by him throwing his weight around.)

But he is frowning, and his messenger is quietly terrified. Moreso when he raises his voice and asks, "And you can swear to the accuracy of this information?"

"I can, my lord--"

"Great," he mutters, and then in a louder voice adds, "Bring me paper and a writing reed."

As much as he hates it, he has to draft a letter to Acatl—and where Acatl goes, Teomitl is sure to follow. There's nothing for it, though; if there are ghosts roaming his streets trying to eat people, his own city's High Priest of Mictlantecuhtli simply isn't up to the task.

-

5 (teomitl – learning from his mistakes)

His second attempt at the throne went much better, all things considered. He had waited. He had been patient. He had let Tizoc's reign stabilize, ignoring the deep cracks that threatened to shatter it each time his craven brother raged at another innocent he suspected of some plot (but he never suspected Teomitl, oh no, not his loyal little brother, his most skilled general). He had clenched his fist each time his fingers strayed towards a knife, each time he thought End it, end it here and now before he breaks our Empire apart—

And when Tizoc died choking on the fluids in his lungs (surprisingly not his fault, though he wouldn't rule out Mihmatini or Acamapichtli having gotten in some long-awaited revenge), he was ready to take the crown, and Tenochtitlan was ready for him.

(He wasn't ready for the first time one of the family members he actually liked called him Ahuitzotl, though. Hearing it from his subordinates? Fine. Hearing it from Acatl's lips? Not fine. To his loved ones, he'd rather be Teomitl until the day he died.)

-

6 (teomitl – an unusual phobia)

They were passing through the markets when Teomitl stopped, shuddering so expressively that his cloak rustled with it. By his side, Acatl paused. The trips to Tenochtitlan’s various markets served a dual purpose—making sure Teomitl could correctly identify needed spell materials as well as teaching him to haggle. While the first was something his student regularly passed with flying colors, the second...well, Teomitl was the Emperor’s brother, and nothing Acatl could try and impart regarding the value of frugality would change that no matter how hard he tried. Still, he’d never seen a reaction like that. Curious, he followed his student’s gaze.

And found his head turned away, every line of his body broadcasting that there was something he very much did not want to see in the other direction. But when Acatl turned to look, all he saw was an animal vendor hawking cages of monkeys.

Teomitl was still shuddering, and now that he studied him a bit closer he could see disgust and fear in his face.

“...Really?” It slipped out before he could stop himself.

Teomitl flinched and mumbled something. Acatl waited. He wasn’t disappointed.

“It’s the hands,” he muttered. “And the faces. They’re like—like little people, it’s creepy. Don’t you dare laugh!”

Acatl blinked at him. “I wasn’t going to.” In fact, he rather wanted to set a reassuring hand on his shoulder, but he refrained. He wasn’t sure how Teomitl would take that. “It was only a surprise.”

Teomitl’s eyes narrowed. Of course he’d take offense anyway. “Because I’m a warrior and Tizoc’s brother?”

He managed, somehow, not to smile. “Neutemoc is terrified of grasshoppers, so no. I would have thought nothing could be creepier than the ahuitzotls.”

“Ahuitzotls aren’t creepy!” Teomitl huffed. And then, at his raised eyebrow, amended it to, “...Not that creepy. At least they just mostly look like otters.”

“Terrifying giant otters with clawed hands on their tails that drown people.”

“...Fair point.” They walked on in silence, but Acatl didn’t miss the way Teomitl drew a little closer to him, as though his presence was a comfort. As though they were friends. It made something go warm in his chest.

After a moment he asked, “But really, grasshoppers? Why grasshoppers? They’re delicious.”

And that was a story Acatl had to tell, complete with hand gestures, and by the time they found the vendors they’d come for, Teomitl seemed to have quite forgotten his fear.

-

7 (acatl & acamapichtli – an unlikely friendship)

“You said you had no intentions of interfering!”

Acamapichtli barely dodges another of the creatures they’re fighting. He’s still not sure what they are—some horrible sorcerous creation, no doubt—but they’ve descended upon the house of Acatl’s brother Neutemoc before, and this time it’s while his children are at home. They’re gone now; he’s successfully covered their retreat. He dispatches the thing with a blow of his sword and takes a deep breath.

For the moment, they are safe. He looks over at Acatl—bloodstained, lightly wounded, and catching his breath over a creature’s corpse—and comments, “Because we are only temporary allies, and you’ve made it clear you trust me about as far as you can throw me.” And probably a good deal less.

Acatl straightens up, glaring at him. “After what you tried to do to my brother? Yes.”

He sighs, shaking his head. “Well, I’ve thought about that, and after...a significant amount of soul-searching, I came to the most wretched of realizations. One that might—no, probably will—curdle your very blood. You may wish to sit down.”

Acatl’s eyes narrow. “Get on with it.”

“You...are my friend.”

-

8 (acatl – performing an autopsy)

This is his favorite part of the job, honestly. Just him, an empty room, and a corpse.

Well. Not just a corpse. Nobody is ever just a corpse, even when their spirit’s gone on to whichever afterlife awaits them. The woman he’s currently leaning over, knife in hand, had in life been forty-year-old Ayotochtli of the Atempan calpulli, dead a few weeks after delivering her fifteenth child. Fifteenth. Her husband suspects foul play—she is his only wife, but his cousin has been angling for her spot in his life and might resort to poison to remove a rival—but Acatl wonders if it hadn’t just been exhaustion. He knows he’d see a lot fewer dead women if the priestesses of Xochiquetzal bothered to share their methods of avoiding childbirth with the common folk, and sometimes he hates them for it.

He closes his eyes and breathes out. Right. This is no place for anger. Ayotochtli died of something that made her tongue swell up and turn purple, made her leave her children and husband behind as she choked on her own blood, and he’s going to find out what. There’s only one way to discover the answer.

He lifts his knife and makes the first incision.

-

9 (mihmatini – the life of a guardian)

The magic of the Duality does not feel like fire. It looks as though it should—it’s hot and flickering, and it moves over her hands like flames. It doesn’t feel like water, either, for all that it’s a deep and cool and soothing shade of blue and ripples where the sun hits it.

No, she closes her eyes and draws the magic down and what she feels—what fills her from the inside out, surging like the tide until it threatens to drown her (but it won’t, because she is the Guardian now and the power of Ometeotl resides in her own skin)—is light. Pure, blessed light.

It’s the most beautiful thing she’s ever felt, and the most terrifying.

She’d wanted to be a housewife. She’d wanted to marry, to raise her own children. But fate has intervened (and gods, part of her hates Teomitl for it, for being the perfectly-placed virgin of Imperial blood they’d needed for the ritual to take place) and so this, instead, is to be her role. To guard the Sacred Precinct and the imperial family, keep the invisible boundaries, chant and lift her hands and call down this raging torrent of azure brilliance for the rest of her life.

She closes her eyes. Breathes in. Breathes out.

Mihmatini. A peasant’s daughter. Sister to Acatl, High Priest for the Dead, the Jaguar Knight Neutemoc, and the entirely ordinary women Icnoyotl, Yoltzin, Nelli, and Nematiliztli. Wife of Teomitl, the future Master of the House of Darts.

And Guardian of the Duality.

She opens her eyes, and the world around her is blue, pulsing light. And she smiles.

She can work with this.

-

10 (ceyaxochitl & acatl – behind the mask)

People don't like her, but that's fine. She's not here to be liked. She is here to defend the invisible boundaries between the Fifth World, the heavens, and the underworld. To keep the imperial family safe from magical harm. To ensure that the Duality, that sacred two-in-one force underpinning all the other gods, continues to bless them with life.

So no, it doesn't bother her that young Acatl distrusts and dislikes her. She's trying to push him to greater things, from the life of a poor and humble priest to the skull-mask of a High Priest of Mictlantecuhtli where she knows he'll excel. She's not trying to be his friend.

...But sometimes, when he is being particularly stubborn and self-deprecating, she really thinks he needs one.

-

11 (coyolxauhqui – believe me, darling, the stars were made for falling)

She's been torn to pieces, imprisoned under rock and mortar and living blood, but Coyolxauhqui, She of the Silver Bells, She of the Painted Bells, She of the Star Skirt, who once was the moon in the sky—she still has her power, and her followers, and her worshippers, even though no one mortal can hear her screams from underneath the Great Temple.

Free me! Love me! Unchain me, so that I may unleash my rage upon these usurpers!

The Mexica do not hear. They scurry around under the light of her brother's sun, and she drowns anew in their blood and hearts each morning, but they do not truly know what awaits them if they stop. She has been bound too long, and her rage is only a whisper to them.

But the stars hear—her beautiful sisters, all four hundred of them—and when the Temple cracks and she feels moonlight on her face—

She screams, and the stars fall for her in all their terrible glory.

-

12 (acatl & quenami – see how the brain plays around/and you fall inside a hole you couldn't see)

There is a razor's edge of obsidian at his throat, and Quenami is smiling, and Acatl—his eyes open, his eyes finally and irreversibly open—curses himself for a thousand different kinds of a fool. He'd thought, Surely, those who select the next Revered Speaker will want Tenochtitlan to prosper. He'd thought, There are star-demons in the palace and the blood of innocents drenching the earth, nobody could possibly be so short-sighted as to engage in politics at a time like this.

He'd thought wrong. Quenami's eyes are alight with smug, sick victory as he announces the charge of treason, and he isn't sure who he hates more—the other man, or himself. He's been blind, and now he's going to die for it.

He glances to where Teomitl is hedged in by swords and quickly shakes his head before the man's vibrating fury explodes. Tizoc-tzin probably won't kill his own brother, not if Teomitl's smart enough to keep his head down. If the boy stays quiet, he should be safe.

But then, he’s been wrong before.

-

13 (teomitl & acatl – i’d like to know why you are all alone while I'm lost at sea)

He has to do this. He has to. He's the Master of the House of Darts, heir apparent to the Mexica Empire; if he doesn't tear Tizoc from the mockery his brother has made of the throne, who will? Who will keep them together, otherwise?

You will break us, snarls Acatl-tzin.

I'm trying to save us, he snaps back, but the words that stick in his throat until he chokes on them are Help me. There's more locked behind them—I thought about this, please trust me, please respect me—but he's too afraid that his sister is right. That if he lays his stone heart at Acatl's feet, the man will leave it in the dust and walk away.

He's walking away now, alone. Heading off to stop a plague and protect the boundaries of the Fifth World—alone. And Teomitl, lost without his hand on his shoulder and his smile like the stars that guide his path, is letting him.

-

14 (teomitl – you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take)

"You'll never have a better chance than this," his sister snarled, and Teomitl met her gaze without flinching. She was right, of course; Tizoc had fled the city in fear of the plague and all the auguries said that here, now, today, would be the perfect time for him to take the throne. He only had to—

(go through Acatl and Mihmatini, and—)

(cut down all who opposed him and—)

(slay the people he loved more than his own breath, the only ones who loved him best in the world and—)

"I know," he said, and the look of triumph on her face was ugly. He erased it with his own smile. "But I'll make it happen, someday."

He laid down his bow and quit the field. There would be other shots.

(When Acatl smiled at him, he counted the day a victory after all.)

-

15 (acatl, chalchiuhnenetl, & teomitl – jazz age au)

As soon as Acatl sees the middle-aged woman sitting in the back room of the speakeasy—prim and proper and utterly unsuited for her smoky surroundings—he knows he's made a mistake coming here. But this is the last place anyone remembers seeing Teomitl enter, and if his protege is in danger he can't just sit back and do nothing. So instead of making a sensible retreat, he bows. "Forgive me for my intrusion, but I'm looking for someone. I was told he was here."

"We can't help you, detective." The burly men at her side shift threateningly.

He holds her gaze, though his fingers shake. "I think you can. I'm looking for Teomitl."

The barrel of a gun presses against the back of his skull. The woman smiles. "And you think you'll find him here?"

In that moment, he knows he's going to die. Teomitl, I'm sorry.

"No. He's mine. Aren't you, Acatl?" And he knows that voice, but not like this—it's never been this cold, this unfeeling. Part of him wants to cry. The rest of him is shaking, splintering apart with rage.

He's found Teomitl, but the way the expensively-dressed young man is looking at him like an unfortunate obstacle says he's lost him long before that.

-

16 (teomitl & nezahual – river of perfume, river of wine)

Nezahual hummed contentedly as he settled back onto his pile of jaguar pelts. "You see, Teomitl? This is the sort of life you ought to be focusing on, instead of charging across half the sea-ringed world under your brother's banners. He'll be dead soon enough, and then you can focus on ruling. Why not enjoy your station while you can?"

Teomitl closed his eyes, counted to ten, and allowed himself ten seconds' serious fantasizing about shoving the Revered Speaker of Texcoco off the barge. The man's concubines would probably fish him out eventually. "We can't all be you, Nezahual-tzin."

"That doesn't mean you can't live a little!"

Someone had filled Teomitl's cup with wine. He thought about the remainder of the trip ahead of them, thought about the need to not cause any diplomatic incidents, and drained it to the dregs.

-

17 (acatl – working through the cold)

The dry season always turned the nights cold, but he didn't feel it, not really. Oh, his limbs shook, and in a detached away he registered that his fingers were freezing, but it didn't matter. It wasn't a problem.

Acatl took one breath, another, and slashed both his earlobes with the impossibly sharp edge of his ritual knife. Even the hot blood was only warm for an instant before it too turned to a river of ice.

The grave-chill of Mictlan filled his lungs until he almost drowned in it, fathomless black nothing hollowing him out to bone-chimes and dry dead skin, and he inhaled. No, he was the High Priest of Mictlantecuhtli, and nothing so banal as the weather could be a problem when he was accustomed to this.

-

18 (mihmatini & teomitl – fear of needles)

"You're not telling me, on the night before your coronation, that you're scared of needles."

Now her husband is flushed and defensive, and she feels a little bad. Not much—Teomitl is a warrior, used to shedding his own blood in devotion to the gods, and the emerald septum piercing that will mark his ascension as Revered Speaker can't be that much worse—but a little. Before she can apologize, though, he huffs, "It's not the pain that bothers me. It's that Nezahual is going to be the one with the needle."

Ah, yes. The Revered Speaker of Texcoco is the one who performs that particular function at the imperial coronation, and Teomitl's never gotten along with him. "Maybe you should have been nicer to him."

"Mihmatini!"

She smiles. "You'll be fine. I'll be waiting for you when it's over, and if he's hurt you I'll kick him down the temple steps."

"...That does help," he mutters. "Thanks."

"And I won't say anything if you cry."

"Mihmatini!"

-

19 (acatl, teomitl & mihmatini – zombie apocalypse au)

"I changed my mind," Mihmatini announced. "Teomitl, you should have killed your brother when you had the chance. At this point, I'd hand you the knife."

Teomitl sighted down the shaft of his arrow and loosed, piercing another shambling horror through the skull. "It's not too late, you know."

Acatl gritted his teeth and tuned them both out. Yes, bringing Tizoc back to life had left a hole between their world and Mictlan. Yes, killing him might close it. But that was something they could worry about when the immediate threat of hordes of the risen dead weren't throwing themselves against every ward the Temple of Mictlantecuhtli could muster.

He lifted one bloodstained hand and traced a complicated series of glyphs in the air. There. That should hold them. For a little while, at any rate.

-

20 (acatl – apocalypse au)

The Fifth World ends in screams and the shaking of the earth under their feet as Tezcatlipoca—Tepeyollotl, the Mountain Heart, the great jaguar—strides the land and roars his triumph from the top of the Great Temple. The Fifth Sun is falling. He will be the sixth. He will be the sixth, and Acatl has failed to stop it.

"You haven't," Teomitl says. His face is streaked with ash and blood and one arm is heavily bandaged, but he's alive. They're all alive, him and his family, and they're huddled in the ruins of the Duality House as they try to figure out what to do. "We can try again."

"Try what? To stop him?" Acatl shakes his head, feeling the words as bitter bile on his tongue. "How do you stop a god in the flesh?"

"We've done it before," Teomitl says, and smiles as though that will make everything better.

For once in Acatl's life, it doesn't help.

[cosmicmapping-blog]

Thoughts on The Last Jedi (Spoilers)

Yesterday, After two weeks of narrowly avoiding several spoilers in the form of MovieWeb articles and obnoxious Twitter posts, I finally got the chance to check out the latest installment and 8th episode of the Star Wars saga, The Last Jedi.

I had my apprehensions about the film going in. The “Porg” creatures seen in the trailers and marketing immediately reminded me of soulless capitalistic entities such as Minions created exclusively for maximizing profit scared me that Disney might be heading down the wrong path with the franchise. Although, knowing Breaking Bad director Rian Johnson was at the helm of this film always gave me excitement and hope that this film would end up being a worthy addition to the Star Wars mythos. I mean, Come on now. A Star Wars movie directed by the guy who was responsible for some of the best episodes of BREAKING BAD. This had to have been good. Different, But good. At let me tell you... He did not disappoint.

What I love about this movie is that it TAKES RISKS. Sure, It has some dumb moments clearly shoe-horned in for toddlers, But Ech. They never jump the shark with these moments and everything still feels like it belongs in the Star Wars universe. And the Porgs ended up being FAR less annoying than I thought they’d be. I actually kind of enjoyed them while they were just moseying around on Ahch-To. It added life to the universe and felt proper. Although, Once they started boarding the Millennium Falcon, chewing the wiring and messing with Chewbacca, The “Minionness” of the Porgs really started to show and slightly took away from the immersion of the movie. I also find it sad that Chewbacca’s role in the movie was almost exclusively tied to these scenes with the Porgs.

Anyways, Let’s get into the nitty-gritty.

This film was considerably darker than The Force Awakens, But it doesn’t rely on its darkness as a gimmick. Many Shows/Movies today just love to wear their darker nature like a parade float and march down the streets yelling “Look at me! look at me! We killed off a bunch of dudes for no reason, Aren’t we so hip and edgy!” Shows like The Walking Dead or Game of Thrones (While both being two of my favorite shows) Have done this in the past. Instead of using dark writing as a tool to lift the narrative itself and tell meaningful stories, They’ll just do something dark and edgy to get on Twitter trending for a few days and up their ratings. Season 5 of Game of Thrones is a great example of this. Now I am NOT AT ALL saying dark storytelling is a bad or lazy thing, Not at all. I absolutely love dark storytelling. I use it in my own videos all the time, And I believe it’s an absolutely wonderful way to generate emotion and build connections between the Audience and the story. Although, If it’s nothing but darkness, What’s the point of watching?... It’s the same thing for overly-happy meaningless drivel. If there’s no conflict, Why be invested?... And if there’s no resolution, Just endless sadness, Why be invested?... Anyways, I’m getting off topic.

Here are a couple bullet points and moments that really stood out for me:

1: Yoda’s scene

The appearance of Yoda was truly an unexpected and wonderful move. Yoda appears essentially to bring Luke out of his nihilist fervor, And into the light once more. By destroying the first Jedi temple, Which was just a beautiful move. Yoda doesn’t show up just to tell Luke to “Believe in himself” or to “Hold on to the light” He agrees with Luke and straight up says “You’re right, Fuck the past” And sets the tree ablaze. Which is so surprising given Yoda spent half the movies trying to preserve the Jedi order, Making this even more meaningful. Instead, What he shows Luke isn’t some corny message about the light or whatever. It’s about moving on. Leaving the past in the past and setting out towards a brighter future, Even if it means burning it all down. And as Luke & Yoda sat there, Watching the tree burn, I dought there was a dry eye in the theater. The full-circle moment shared between not a master and his Padawan, But now two equal Jedi-Masters was completely heart-wrenching. The line “Oh I have missed you, Young Skywalker” Particularly got to me. One tiny thing though, I didn’t particularly care for Yoda’s puppet... I wish they either went with the CGI model from Revenge of The Sith, Or made a version more accurate to the original Empire Strikes Back puppet.

2: The silent Light-speed cruiser into Snoke’s ship.

This was an absolutely stunning scene. First of all, The very notion of this scene is crazy on its own. There was always something about the cruiser ships in Star Wars that fascinated me as a kid. Their stunning grandeur, A city in the sky. And knowing these weren’t just hunks of metal floating in space, No. These were ships. Thousands of rooms in each section of the ship, Thousands of people living their lives. Bedrooms, Theatres, Lavatories, The control rooms. All within the confines of this existentially massive tomb. It was always just so interesting to me. The idea of one of these things slamming into the other at light speed is totally something out of “Wouldn’t it be crazy if they did this” conversation, AND THEY DID IT. When the tension is building, Things are looking bleakest for the Resistance as their entire movement are sitting ducks to The First Order’s cannons, The streak of light goes through Snoke’s ship and you’re left with nothing but silence accompanying the visuals of the incomprehensibly massive shockwave destroying The First Order’s fleet and restoring hope to the resistance, It’s an absolutely transcendent feeling.

3: Leia’s space scene.

I thought this was it for Leia. When the bombs hit the deck I automatically assumed I had witnessed the death of one of the most iconic characters in Film history, And I couldn’t help but feel showing her floating corpse drifting through the void of space was a tad much... Then it happened. Through The Force, Her own energy, Or god knows what. She came back to consciousness and flew through the void back to the ship. This was totally out of nowhere and probably the scene most people are split on. Some think it’s completely unfounded, Makes no sense, And jumps the shark entirely. Others believe it worked perfectly to stun the audience and build the narrative. I like to believe it worked well, But unfortunately, we’re never going to see the end of this new narrative... It’s been said by the production team that Episode Nine was going to be Leia’s movie. The plot would have been very focused around Leia what most likely whatever these new found abilities happened to be. Although, Due to Carrie Fisher’s incredibly depressing untimely passing, This will never happen. Leaving us to wonder what exactly could have been.

4: Captain Phasma.

This is a tricky one. What exactly are they trying to do with this character?... I remember back in 2015 during all the hype for The Force Awakens, Captain Phasma was completely over marketed. She was shown in nearly all promotional material for the movie, Making us believe she was going to be a massive part of this new trilogy. Eventually, she ended up getting barely any screen time in The Force Awakens, And hardly a few cameos in The Last Jedi. And now she’s dead. I really don’t understand... There was potential for this character. Gwendoline Christie has proven in the past to be an absolutely amazing actress when given good material to work with, But this... I really just don’t understand why Phasma was even in these movies. We already had very strong villains with Kylo Ren, Snoke, And General Hux. There really wasn’t a need for Phasma. Gwendoline Christie should have been given a different role entirely. Overall, Phasma’s place in the story was completely superficial and just feels like a ploy for merchandise. Almost an adult version of Porgs.

5: Luke Skywalker

Well... That’s it, Huh? Luke’s arc in this movie was a complete roller coaster of emotions. Writing this must have been a challenge unlike anything many of us will face in our lifetimes. The team behind The Last Jedi were responsible for tying up the character arc for LUKE SKYWALKER. One of the most culturally important figures in modern history, The modern day Hercules! And I gotta say, it was truly beautiful. Luke went from cynical and jaded from his years of shame and exile caused by his own mistakes, To back to being the hopeful wisecracking galaxy-saving superhero we remember from the original trilogy. Luke tied up his duties in the mortal realm brilliantly, Projecting himself lightyears away to face Kylo Ren and bring closure to his friends and family. I teared up when he winked at C3-PO. It was amazing. And then we sat there, Luke having restored hope, Brought closure, And paved the way for the new generation, The entire theater watched Luke Skywalker become one with the force, As Yoda did before him. Luke Skywalker, Has Died. And not to instill any type of forced sadness in the audience, Or to play with our emotions unjustly. But to bring closure to a man who desperately deserved it.

Rian Johnson is truly a visionary. This film took risks, And they all paid off. This film doesn’t seek to bring you easy laughs or joyous romps. Neither does it seek to destroy you and leave you with a broken heart, No. This film takes you across all ranges of the Human emotional spectrum. It embodies so much of what makes things like Undertale so wonderous. This film is about hope, And holding on to that hope in even the direst and most existentially horrific situations. There will always be a way. As Leia said, “Hope is like the sun. If you only believe it when you see it you’ll never make it through the night.”

The Last Jedi is one of the best movies in the franchise. And I feel humbled to have been alive during its release.