#Anyway 4 hours of sleep is gonna mean today's gonna be a 2 maybe 3 cups of coffee kind of day
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truantng · 4 months ago
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200/366 Linktree
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memberment · 3 months ago
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GOOD MORNING EVERYONE
So the Trinitarians brain worm is back and Morning Glory is now longer and biting the dust as far as my focus goes.
But like, I genuinely want to talk to anyone who's invested in what's to come as far as part two goes. SO PLEASE. I IMPLORE THE FOUR OF YOU WHO PERPETUALLY TAKE NOTICE OF MY SCREAMS INTO THE VOID.
We're all aware that Trin is a time loop fic. That is confirmed.
BUT THE PROBLEM IS HOW I'M GOING ABOUT DOING THAT. AND I NEED INPUT FROM PEOPLE THAT ARE NOT ME AS FAR AS PLEASES AND SPARKLES GO, YES?
Because like sure I'm writing it and like fuck everything else, let me tell my story. But it's the how of it all like if I'm gonna throw another 200 give or take hours into this I would at least like one person to be having a wonderful time drinking and driving (I have since remembered this is not a common phrase, I do not mean this in a literal sense, it's an expression) with me right?
Part two is going to be 50 chapters, give or take. (Part one is about 37 for reference.)
So the plan for part 2 rn is (ROGUHLY):
(1-10) is the second timeline. There are a lot of importants and I cannot just glaze over it all more than that. But we're also working in a bit of a shorter time period than the original events of the story and introductions do not need to happen again, right?
(11-40)ish would be me running through the next timelines in a set up structure -> what changes -> the results of said changes and then inevitably what sends our looper backwards. It wouldn't be running through all the timelines but the more notable ones in kind of a four chapter structure, I am not fully sold on four, but rough estimate yk.
And then 41-50 would be the finale of part two. It's literally the last timeline in its glory and then the epilogue which kicks off part three.
COULD AT LEAST ONE OF Y'ALL SIT THROUGH THAT OR DO YOU GUYS HAVE ANY NOTES AT ALL BECAUSE LIKE
I personally kinda like it but if not a soul is reading this I am throwing myself on the curb with the rest of the garbage LMFAOOO.
I NEED THOUGHTS. OPINIONS. COMMENTS. CONCERNS. ANYTHING.
Anyways, I'm going to work. I have off tomorrow and I broke the ff investment seal for today so insanity and updates will be here tonight and homework will be tomorrow.
HOPE EVERYONE HAS A GOOD DAY <3
(9:30) I am literally falling asleep as I lazily write this angel based on Danse Macabre. Expect all of maybe one more update tonight if the tacos I am abt to receive don't wake me up LMFAO.
Also, I am almost saddened by not having something to post tm. Anyone want an early chapter of something that isn't Genesis/Desolation bc they're both on Monday?????? (I am feeling like a menace rn)
(10:19) tacos and the absolute yap session I just had did wake me up a bit. MAAAYBE might write some more. Idk I slept like three hours last night and went to work I'm kinda dead. But we're at 98.2k!!!!!!🥳
(11:06) okay we made it to 99.6k everything besides the flashback for 31 is done. I'm about to relax and watch something and figure out mechanics of some of this because god this series is A BEAST. Like, I still have six planned chapters left.
Pure insanity. I love it here. I hate it here.
Holy shit wait I just came to the realization that I started this fic exactly one month ago. I have belted out 99.6k for THIS FIC ALONE. (Moreso if we're including future shit that hasn't happened yet)
IN ONE MONTH.
THAT IS FUCKING CRAZY WHAT HTE FUCK LMFAOOOO
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I may or may not be cooking we’ll find out in 6-26 business hours
(5:28) So I just had a very interesting past few business hours. I read a fic I've been waiting ever so patiently to finish. That's cool, right. I go for a walk at 4 in the morning because I'm insane. Fantastic. I get home at five and I'm like ohhhh well what do I do now it's not sleep time yet. Oh write I'm supposed to be drawing.
Nope I reread the epilogue of morning glory and realized Tweek's first address is for my morning glory and Craig's last sign off is your morning glory and now I'm ready to throw myself on the curb with the garbage as I sob. Someone call a trusted adult for me thanks.
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madricat · 2 years ago
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Pompeii Part 4: happy birthday
Summary: Carlos goes through more pain with having to continue his life but what if doing so allows him to gain some happiness again?
Genre: Angst and fluff
Notes: Pompeii Part 4! not really proof read so may be grammar mistakes
Warnings: ANGSTY, MENTIONS OF DEATH, YELLING, CRYING
check out Ducky's first parts pt. 1, pt. 2, pt. 3
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As the month dragged by, Carlos wasn't the same anymore. Every night Carlos would cry himself to sleep at the thought of getting older without his triplets. And with the rebuild of Casita, it made him feel even worse. He couldn’t bring himself to go back to the place that killed both of you. So he never helped rebuild Casita; instead, he would go back to the river every day.
Every time he visited he would bring some of your’s and Camilo’s favorite food because he knew how mad you would be at him for not taking care of himself. During his time he would enjoy the peace of the quiet and only imagine what you guys would have been up to by now, maybe you would have confessed to your crush you told him about a year ago. Or imagine how many fights would end up with a cactus in Camilo cause he pissed off Isabela. Maybe you all would have ganged up against your older sister to make fun and park her new boyfriend. Oh right…yall never say that. Damn. You guys had missed so much in life so far, Carlos can't even bring himself to think of what else you guys would as well. By the time the sun set he would trench back to the house that some villagers were letting his family stay in. 
He arrived back in time for dinner. Once again he just ate his dinner in silence while everyone else was chatting away. He was about to excuse himself when his abuela said something.
“Family, we are all grateful for the help to rebuild our lovely Casita. Tomorrow we shall finally be able to move back in, so tonight please gather up all your stuff so we are ready to move.” 
By the end of dinner Carlos dragged himself back into the room he was staying in. He didn't want to leave yet. Not that he liked this place no, he just didn't want to go back to the same place he lost his meaning to live. The place where the lives of triplets were lost. He didnt even wanna walk near there, let alone live there. But he had no choice, no matter how hard he wanted to avoid this time.
Thankfully he didn't have much to pack anyway, it only took him about an hour. He only had one last thing to pack tho. There he looked at the photo frame that was faced down on his night stand. With a shaking hand he hesitantly lifted it up to reveal a photo of you three on your thirteenth birthday. All of you laughing together while cake smeared all over y’all cause Carlos decided to start a cake fight.
He choked. He remembered all the fun birthdays shared and didn't realize that last year was gonna be the last ever time.
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“Hermano wake up, we get to go back to Casita today!” and enthusiastic Antonio squeaked. 
Carlos weakly opened his eyes that were glue shut from the tears that poured last night. 
“Calmate im getting up”
When he got up body was sore. He had slept all night in the same position clenching onto the photo of you three close to his chest.
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Everyone was standing around the path to casita while mirabel was holding a custom doorknob just for her
“I see me..all of me” she said with tears in her eyes
Once she placed the doorknob in magic spread all throughout the house and bringing it back to life, literally.
Everyone started flooding through the doors bringing back the atmosphere of their once beloved home. But Carlos didn't budge. He stood there staring at the house which he dreaded going back into. A pain started to fill every cavity of his chest just remembering that sight he saw of his siblings. When all of a sudden a hand was placed on his shoulder.
“ It hurts me as well, but we both know that they would want us to go in, no matter how much of chickens they would be acting right now,” Dolores said, causing a low chuckle from Carlos. 
She reached her hand out for him to grab. Slowly he held on to his big sister's hand as he was about to do one of the most painful things in his life, going back to that dreaded place. 
As they both walked through the door side by side he tried hard to stay strong and put on a brave face. Once he stepped in he was flooded by amazing memories he had with you two
“ Hey Stupid what would happen if we started spinning you in the hammock?” an 11 year old Carlos exclaimed to his brother.
“Only one way to find out!” a young and very stupid Camilo agreed.
Flash forward to within 5 minutes with Camilo in a hammock wearing a helmet and holding onto the sides of it for dear life, and on the other side Carlos on the end of the hammock ready to spin him. 
“What are you doing now?!” came in young y/n holding an empanada you just got from your tia.
“ About to see what happens to milo if we spin him in the hammock”
“I’ve got a helmet!” he interrupted.
“Yes he has a helmet. So you gonna help us or not”
“Fineeee” young you had said while stuffing the rest of your empanada in your mouth so you could help them.
“ ha remember that time we convinced Camilo to go into the hammock and spin him around” he said to his sister, remembering the memory
“ isn’t it the time he flung out and you guys had tia keep it a secret from mama cause you both knew you’d get in trouble”
“Haha yeah…it was fun”
Dolores had a smile escape from her seeing him laugh and remember the good times they all had together.
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It has been a month now since they’ve moved back in. Almost everyone had gotten comfy again and settled back in. All but Carlos. Ever since they came back he hasn't opened his door. He didn’t want his powers back, it would only pain him to remember his matching gift with his triplets. And not seeing your guys' doors near his anymore hurts like hell. So instead he has been sleeping in Antonio’s room since Pepa wont let him sleep on the couch downstairs all by himself. 
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At dinner tonight something seemed off. Everyone's chatter sort of seemed a bit forced like they were all trying to hold something in. You can clearly tell in Mirabel’s face that she couldn’t keep straight. All of the sudden it seemed like Pepa had gotten the courage to speak. 
“Carlos it’s your birthday tomorrow, would you like anything?” she asked with hesitation.
“ …I don't want to celebrate,” he said, holding back his tears. He had lost all track of time that he didn’t even notice it was almost his birthday. His birthday…no. It should have been an our birthday instead. He should have celebrated it alongside both of you. Now that he realizes it it was always you and Milo who made a bigger deal out of your guys birthday. All week he would have heard about it. All planning what gifts you wanted to get or who won the vote of the cake flavor this year. But none of it was gonna happen
With this he excused himself from the table and headed up to his room. While he was there he looked at the photo frame that was faced down on his night stand. With a shaking hand he hesitantly lifted it up to reveal a photo of you three on your thirteenth birthday. All of you laughing together while cake smeared all over you all cause Carlos decided to start a cake fight.
He choked. He remembered all the fun birthdays shared and didn't realize that last year was gonna be the last ever time.
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“Happy birthday!” Carlos heard while being licked in the face by Antonio’s jaguar. What an amazing wake up call. 
“Alright Alright i’m awake” he said half awake.
After he had gotten up and ready for the day he and Antonio headed down for breakfast.
When they got downstairs you could tell that the atmosphere felt a bit weird.
“Happy Birthday mijo” Felix calmly said to his son while placing a hand on his back.
“Gracias papa”
“ I miss them greatly as well, but we'll get through this together.”
“Carlos glanced over, giving him a slight smile for the kind gesture. 
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It was now a bit later in the day. Carlos was waiting for his tia to finish making some food for him to take for today. 
During his aimless walk around he ended up going up upstairs. Walking along the edge he held his arm out to let his fingers sweep by the railing. He just did many aimless laps around, only moving to not run into plants. Yet during all this he didnt think a thing. His mind was just blank. 
During lap who knows what, while he was walking he didn't pay attention and tipped over a small vase.
Doing this made him snap out of his trance. Quickly picking up the mess he made he finally realized where he was. There in front of him was his unopened door. He paused his cleaning and just stared at it.
“We both know you should open it”
A whisper voice appeared out of nowhere, scaring the hell out of him.
“AHHH! DOLORES WHAT DA HELL?!”
“Lo siento hermano”
“...maybe your right”
“ que?”
“ I mean those losers would have wanted me to open it by now right?”
“Agreed”
“Should I…?”
“It’s your decision”
Upon hearing this Carlos closed his eyes and took a deep breath. With fear in his eyes he looked at the doorknob. He took small slow steps towards the door and once he reached it his breathing hitched. Raising his hand upwards to grip the doorknob. When his hand was hovering over it he froze. Is he really gonna do this? How will he live with himself? But it’s what they would want right? But it still wouldn’t be the same? The more questions he wondered the fear was more evident on his face then over. Looking over his shoulder to glance at his sister she gave a resuring headnod that it’s okay. With this he finally lowered his hand and gripped on the doorknob. But nothing happened. The door was still blank. Confusion started to rise
“Did it work?”
“I don't know let me give it a try”
He tried to transform into anyone…but his appearance stayed the same.
“Wh-what’s happening?” a distressed Carlos asked
“I-i don't know!” said an equally confused Dolores
Carlos held up both of his hands, they were shaking crazy. His eyes darted all around trying to unscramble the mess in his brain. He looked up to meet the eyes of his sister, his lip trembling.
“CARLOS YOUR FOOD IS READY!” yelled his tia from the kitchen
“...I have to go”
With this he ran down stairs and swiftly grabbed the basket off the counter and ran. He didn’t know where he was running, he just let his feet guide him.
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Finally when his feet stopped he looked up to see where he was. He had ran all the way to your guys’ graves. He hasn’t visited here ever since where you guys were buried, it pained him to come here again. Upon closer look he realized that the ruanas he placed on the grave stones were gone
“ No, no where did they go?!” he yeld while holding back a sob stuck in his throat. 
He collapsed to the floor gripping his ruana near his chest. A pain unimaginable was in his heart. How much more could this day pain him? He sat there balling his eyes out. All the pain that had been building up from today was being released.
“ hey loser you don't look good crying” said a familiar voice
Carlos shot his head up to see who was talking. His hair was a mess and his eyes were bloodshot from the violent sobs. When he looked up he saw a sight he missed all too well.
“Ca-camilo…?”
“Yup! I would say in the flesh but umm yeahhh”
“How are you-where’s y/n?!”
“Over here dumbass”
Carlos shot his head back to see the sight of his sibling standing there. Oh god how much he missed it
“Wait how are you guys-”
“Well, if you would have been smart, I believe you got a new gift. Oh, and we never got the chance to thank you for our ruanas, it was getting cold.” you said.
“Ha your welcome then”
" Now you have to catch us up on everything though"
That was his new gift, being able to talk to the dead. Maybe his gift was still connected to his siblings in the end after all…
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xsturniellax · 1 year ago
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my small heart, for big love.
Feminine reader x matt sturniolo
Warnings: anxiety, fluff, kissing, 1st person.
Summary: you and Matt have been dating for 3 months, it's coming up to be your 4 month anniversary. Something happens between you and Chris, will it change your perspective of you and Matt?
A/n: please dm me if you have any ideas you want me to write, and I enjoyed writing this! :)
I woke up, the sun shining on my face. My head was layed on Matt's head; I could hear his heart beat going smoothly and steady. He was awake before me like always. I look up at him and smiled, as I snuggle into him more, wrapping us in the warm duvet.
"I never want to leave." Matt says, rubbing my head and playing with my hair. He would always say this in the morning, and it would still make me blush.
"Do you want my hoodie again y/n?" Matt asks, blushing and laughing. I laugh along with him and nod my head. He gets up slowly and grabs a black and green dinosaur printed one. I put it on over my pajamas and we hold hands and go downstairs.
"Morning guys." Nick smiles at us whilst ording our breakfast from McDonald's.
"Goodmorning." I say to Nick, giving him a thank you afterwards. Yet again, I'd try to pay but he'd always reply with 'no way, this is my treat'.
Down comes Chris, he looks like he had a rough night.
"Did you get any sleep Chris?" I ask his, whilst hugging onto Matt. He'd answer with a groan. Definitely not.
"So, y/n, still up for today?" Matt asks me, booping my nose. I give him a smile and a nod as he kisses me on the cheek.
"Single lonely people over here! Take it to somewhere we both can't get jealous!" Nick laughs and so does Chris. I can hear Matt giggling in my ear as he twirls my hair.
"I'm gonna go get ready, okay?" I go up the stairs, putting my hands out like I'm going to miss him, even though I'll probably see him in a minute.
I get dressed in a pink, floral dress. I pair it with some white sandals and a cute white bag. Then I do my hair; curl it, put a hair band in it, and a matching bow to the dress. Then I hear a knock.
"It's me, Chris." Chris says, still sounding like he's been awake for a year.
"Come in!" I say, packing away my hair pins and the straightners.
"Woah... I meant to say Matt went out for a bit, something to do with Madi." Chris scratches his head still admiring me.
"I'm dating your brother Chris, no need to stare." I say, rolling my eyes. He gives an awkward laugh, as he walks closer to me.
"Matt said he'll be 2 ish hours... " he looked at me sad. I look at him a frown.
"Oh, so im guessing we aren't going out then... " I sit down, looking at myself in the vanity mirror, packing away some makeup.
"Well maybe you and me can go out... As friends?" He asks, trying to reassure me that my hard work didn't go in for nothing.
"Sure, I'd like that." I say, turning back to look at him and giving him a smile.
*1 hour later*
Messages:
Matt: hey y/n I'm so sorry, madi needs me to stay the night, she needs help with this stupid science assignment. we can definitely do something tomorrow.
Y/n: oh okay, me and chris are going out anyways to make this day a bit more exciting, have fun with stupid science!
Matt: i mean we'll try, and have fun with chris!
Y/n: i will :)
Another knock again. I put my phone down and open the door. There stands Chris. He's actually done something with his hair for once. It looks nice...
"Ready to go out?" Chris asks, still admiring me.
"Yeah, and remember, I have a boyfriend who's your brother, and it isn't the gay one!" I say, laughing again. He does his little head scratch and gives a nervous laugh. I grab my bag and we go.
I have no clue where he's taking me, or for how long.
"We're here!" Chris looks impressed with himself. He's brought me to a secret part of the beach, you could see the sunset perfectly.
"Wow..." I say, admiring the sunset like Chris once admired me. Our hands brush past each other. His pinky, interlocked with mine, causing us to end up holding hands. He then spins me round and I turn to face him, holding his other hand. We look deeply into eachothers eyes. I completely forget about Matt.
*ting*
It's my phone. I let go of Chris and go to my phone.
Messages:
Matt: hey gorgeous, coming home now since we've finished it already, meet at the beach? x
Y/n: yay! yeah, I'll wait there. x
"That was Matt. He's coming back home now, he wants to meet me at the beach as well... Just me." I look down, trying not to maintain any eye contact from what just have happened.
"Okay, thanks for a nice time..." I can tell Chris is hurt by the tone of his voice. I have to tell Matt what happened.
*30 minutes later*
"Y/n!" Matt come running up behind me, hugging me from behind and spinning me in the air. I gave a huge smile, but my eyes caught something. Chris, he was looking at us through the window with a worried face.
"How was your little friend date with chris?" Matt asks, looking at me all cute.
"It was... Good!" Dammit. I need to tell him somehow.
A few minutes go by and were sat on the beach.
"Matt... I need to talk to you about something." I say, anxiety filling my body, causing my hands to shake with fear.
"Yeah?" He looks at me like he knows something is wrong.
"When me and Chris had our little walk on the beach together... We, well. We almost kissed." I say, looking away.
"Oh?" Oh? Is that it? There's no defensiveness in oh. I nod at him, my eyes filling with tears.
"Hey it's okay y/n, mistakes happen. It's not like you meant it. And you know how my brother is, he can get jealous sometimes. And I don't have to talk to him if you don't want me to." Matt pulls me in and hugs me tight, tears flowing from my face. I let a very stuttered 'are you sure' and he nods silently.
"I love you." Matt hasn't said that yet. Like ever before. I stop crying and get out of hugging. We look at each other, deeply in each other's eyes.
"I love you too..." I say, smiling at him, still shaking from what's just happened. He leans in and wipes my tears away, then he gently pushed my hair behind my ear. We share a kiss under the moonlight. But still in the corner of my eye, I see Chris in his window still watching...
Thank you for reading! Let me know if you want a part 2 to the story, and please dm me if you have any ideas for another upcoming story!! 💗
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horce-divorce · 1 year ago
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3 entire days of calling every shelter from Traverse City to Indiana and being told there's nowhere to leave my boyfriend's cats, and it's once again other queers who come to our rescue... We have to take the cats about 4 hours away, but they will be safe and with someone we know and trust.
I have to take care of a few things at home this weekend (very important kids bday party, getting my phone replaced, making sure the car is working) before we take the cats. We're gonna try to go grab what we can of Bel's things from the basement and pawn or donate the rest. On Monday I'll start calling housing commissions again about places we can apply for, and start looking for other ways to make money. There's a festival up here soon, maybe I can get some under the table work, but also I'm thinking it's probably officially time to make an Onlyfans...
Then we need to stealthify the car and make it more habitable for the 2 of us. Like right now it's fine to camp in but long-term it needs a lot. We're sleeping on horrible flat bed rolls that hurt my back and joints, so I need a foam pad for the car. And we desperately need a fan for ventilation, as well as shades for the windows and more screens for ventilation as well.
Considering the very real possibility that we may not be housed again by winter, we need to be ready to stealth camp wherever we can find a place to park. We've talked about traveling or going south for the winter, or even jumping btwn friends homes and staying a few weeks at a time. But in any case the #1 thing we will need in addition to our meds is gas. We will be absolutely and utterly fucked without gas bc we are in Bumfuck Nowhere with no other way out.
I feel selfish for saying I'm less scared about being homeless than the last time... I know what this means. I've already been chronically unhoused for 10 years, I'm used to the packing up and going. Bel just lost everything. His home, his pets, his family, his childhood belongings, years worth of art and gifts and sentimental things, his support system. He feels like HE is going to die, and rapidly swinging from feeling like he should bc he's worthless, to being like "I am more powerful than God and I will live out of spite!!!" I don't know how much he's actually processed yet since it's all so fresh.
But I am so much more functional on his behalf than I was for just me. Losing myself seems like par for the course, who cares. The stakes are much higher if Bel is the one getting lost. I can't let that happen. I may not be able to house us or protect him in a way that matters, but whatever it takes, I will NOT leave him all alone. I wish so much that someone had been there with me the first time.
Anyway that's just the latest rundown for anyone invested. If I made a little Amazon wishlist w some of the stuff we need for the car, do yall suppose anyone would help us w those items? I think it's worth a shot, I may poke at that today.
Ugh
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survivor-marieta-islands · 1 year ago
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Episode 4: "Tell me why i power nap for 6 hours and wake up to the vote being for me"—Ellie
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Sin Sazonar
Tanner
Adeline seems to be on my side if we lose challenges but I don’t think we will
Adeline
I’ve tried to be a little more active recently but it’s v hard hehe. Got some talking in today tho with Trinica, hairie, and tanner
Shawn
Okay I don't know I'm not loving how everyone wants to bow out. Like puzzles are fun, this is supposed to be a fun game. And people want to bow out instead, because they don't feel confident in it. Like that doesn't matter, have some confidence, we can't all sit it out. I understand I HAVE to participate, but I said repeatedly before that I was so down to do this. I play online puzzles for fun, I feel good. It takes me around 3 min per puzzle but I can get that down further if I concentrate.
Trinica
My tribe is truly driving me nuts with challenge strategizing. Why did Shawn suggest I sit out after I did so well in the other challenges? Why would we not sit out someone like Tanner who has already shown poor challenge performances in the past? Why, when I suggested we rate ourselves and simply sit out the worst two, did everyone AGREE and THEN ARGUE ABOUT "WELL TANNER REALLY WANTS TO PLAY"??? okay but i really want to WIN y'all ;___;
AJ
Puzzles? In a Raffy Season? Madness.
--
In all seriousness though I do believe we’re going to lose this challenge. Current normal tribe time is around an hour - I have heard nothing from Tanner and I do worry about that. My only hope that we win is that someone is mysteriously super good at this puzzle and finishes it in under ten minutes otherwise we….we lose. I mean I feel like we’ve already lost - this really and truly was and is our challenge to lose. But I’ll go to sleep, and what happens when I wake up happens.
Arvin
I sat out of the challenge because I'm not really confident in jigsaw puzzles, and it seems like everyone is not gonna sit out so I volunteered. But if it's a slide puzzles, I'm gonna play 100%.
I'm gonna sit out. I really enjoyed my time in the sit out bench. I even asked Jay if they have something for me in the bench, like an advantage or something, but yeah, they got nothing for me. Hahaha. But yeah we won the challenge. I didn't know what the strategy was but it worked. New school strategy rules.
Brandi
I was at my highest high from the win and my lowest low when I thought we lost for .5 seconds.
Now sin sazonar are back babyyyyy!!!!!!
Ps. Jay is the best host and they really helped me feel welcome and it makes me sad when they say they are crying or others aren’t being very nice to them. They are putting on this entire game! We are so lucky they put in all this effort for us. I hope people learn to be nicer.
Shawn
Trinica really helped us out with the puzzle thing. Our host got a lil bullied because of that, but what can we say, everything is turning out new school. No tribal tonight again for us. I hope we keep winning like this, maybe there won't even be a merge after all. Ps still hoping I make it to merge. I won't be able to win, I know that, but id like to make it to merge. Just to say I did.
Trinica
First of all, stream Unreal Unearth by Hozier gays!!!!
Second of all, we WON THE PUZZLE CHALLENGE!!!! In a way I actually hate but listen you gotta do what you gotta do, and if you gotta game a puzzle platform, you gotta game a puzzle platform. Sorry to that man (Raffy) because no way was I beating your 18 minute score. But you're the true winner of this challenge.
Tanner got 174 minutes, and Adeline didn't submit and got 178, so if it wasn't for our 10% AD we would have lost this one thanks to those 2. I would sooner vote out Tanner if we get a chance since he has done poorly on every single challenge and this is the first Adeline flopped on (and she was not in top form as she was sick).
Anyway, Hairie said he doesn't want to write my name down ever and I'm hoping he means that 💓
Hairie
There wasn’t enough social battery to get on video for confessional so this time it’s by text.
This challenge was ours to lose. A jigsaw puzzle. At first we couldn’t decide on the sit-outs which led to a randomiser.
Then, the tribe was clearly struggling with 174 mins and then the rest ranging from 30+ - 60 mins … Deadly indeed and it was probably going to someone that did not perform well going home had we lost.
I knew I had to step in and share the strategy that I learned from an ally from a game shout out to you !!!
Reducing most of our times and we ended up clutching the win thanks to the challenge advantage because that was a close one.
With that, sending the old school tribe to another tribal and hoping they shake things up. (I don’t even know what’s going but yeah) 😂
The idol hunt is interesting. People are interesting. So I decided to fake a message for shits and giggles. Maybe it sent someone spiralling? I don’t know and do I care? Also no. I’m in my unhinged era and Jay’s here for it so am I. Actually I’m THE calmest person on my tribe (or maybe I’m delusional) well maybe I am also in my delulu era because who says we cannot be in two eras concurrently. I should have been on the old school tribe since they say they’re calm and not chaotic or messy (or behind the scenes). Then I came clean about the lie of the idol hunt the next day and called people out (stop lying too much) and making stuff confusing or cryptic and to pay it forward, told more truths about the idol ground (probably more than anyone) because I did publicly. Nobody knows what game I am playing … even me LMAO
Trust rankings 1. Trinica 2. Arvin 3. Clefford 4. Tanner 5. Adeline 6. Brandi 7. AJ 8. Shawn
Antigua
Amy
no but it's the way the other side had a strategy where people were finishing under 5 minutes and they just let someone on their own tribe do that puzzle for almost 3 hours.
Raffy
I know everyone on the tribe is hung up on the other tribe doing so well, but I need them to understand that if Zo had participated, like AT ALL, then we would have won the challenge. All Zo needed to do was complete the puzzle ONCE under 51 minutes and we would have won regardless if they had some super secret strategy. Not only that we BEAT them without their advantage. I am so upset with Zo right now, but I can't even do anything about it because she has a whole non-men alliance protecting her. Without it, I could probably make a very successful push to eliminate her, but alas. I am at the whims of those on the top of the food chain and I have to exist as a second-rate tribe member.
Colin
god im so tired of LOSING i dont wanna VOTE ANYONE OUT ANYMORE i just want to REST
Raffy
So, on this call with Ellie, we both agreed we need to cut our losses and take out Colin. They are being entirely too messy with that last vote. And it's dragged both our games down as a result.
But what do I even do? I guess just survive until a tribe swap, survive until merge. My whole ORG career and life is just about survival apparently. I gotta keep being in the good graces of Zo since she is fully just controlling this entire tribe. Hopefully, Amy, Jinx, and/or Ellie can put in a good word for me with the people who actually control this tribe. It's not the worst position to be in, but it is not ideal either.
I really just don't know what more else I could have done in this game. Like, it seemed like everyone liked me, but I guess I'm just not in-group material for these types of things. Oh well. That's enough wallowing for now.
--
I am now shifting the target to Zo because the challenge performance makes it easier to target her. I talked to Ellie and Colin about it. Ellie seemed to want to do it. Colin seemed hesitant. I talked to JG. He seemed ok with it. But, according to Amy, he was just saying what I want to hear and placating me. Amy also seems hesitant since she doesn't seem to think the numbers are there. I'm tired. I'm not doing this anymore. People can just vote me out or not. It's not like anything I say can convince anyone.
Maddison
HEY PARTY PEOPLEEEE. i’ve been MIA visiting my parents but here we are at tribal again :) not live laugh loving the fact that we keep losing but it iz what it iz. i suspect a swap or a twist of some sort after this given the number discrepancy between the tribes, but who knows. i’d like to keep the barbs together for this vote and make it easy with 5 on whoever we choose, barring an idol. honestly i’d love for colin to go home because he is a self-professed ‘messy’ player, but raffy is also a threat down the line. jg seems like an easy target but i don’t think he’d be a social threat at swap/merge. the barbs are a whole other set of considerations but why ruin a voting block at this point in the game? we will see how it shakes out ig!!
Zo
I’m sensing some woman on woman crime this evening…
Maddison
barb on barb violence… stay tuned
Raffy
JG is throwing me under the bus to Zo about how I am spreading her name along with Ellie. I'm so tired of this man. I could literally give him all the information in the world and he still would rather shoot himself in the foot, dive off a cliff, and swallow a gallon of bleach before ever thinking, maybe, JUST MAYBE, that Steven, or Colin, or Ellie, or I are telling the truth. Get your head out of your ass and maybe you'd be able to win this game. But as it stands, JG is dead to me in this game because he cannot see what is right in front of him, he cannot keep his mouth shut, and he has some sort of vendetta against me and my friends. But we'll see how that works out for him.
Colin
so theres TWO major alliances (that im aware of) on this tribe. the first one was me + raffy + steven + ellie. the other one is zo + jinx + maddison + ellie. zo told me that maddison made this alliance round 2 when her name was going around. it was a huge reveal because ellie was in our alliance and didn't say ANYTHING about it. and jinx is working closely with raffy and hasn't said anything about it. thats what my perception of the two sides are.
So there’s a Secret Plan happening to vote out Zo because of the challenge (she didn't submit), but I think it’s mostly because Raffy wants to make a move against the other alliance. I like Zo a lot and don’t wanna vote her, except Zo has that alliance and I'm not in it, so I have no idea if she even actually wants to work with me, we've just had a few one on one game conversations.
meanwhile, I want JG OUT. like he has no intention of working with us and it's so obvious. I get Zo is a scary social player but I don't think that it's worth it to vote her out rn, we need allies heading into a likely swap next round.
Zo
my name: *is on the chopping block* me: but what if i took a nap until tribal?
Colin
okay THE RATS ARE LOOSE. I REPEAT, THE RATS ARE LOOSE.
i TOLD Raffy not to trust JG. like I've BEEN saying that. he threw him under the bus last round, and he's doing it again. So last round it was me, Raffy, and Ellie who decided we wanted to go vote JG. But Raffy told JG that it was Zo who put his name out. JG promptly went to Zo and was like “Heard you were throwing my name out” when she literally was not, that was just a lie said by Raffy.
NOW JG is going to Zo again, telling her that Raffy and Ellie are coming for her, and is i guess trying to orchestrate a blindside against Ellie it seems?? now I'm in the corner over here like OK NOW CAN WE VOTE JG?! I think raffy is finally getting the message that keeping him is NOT smart.
I talked with Zo and it sounds like she and Jinx were already playing with the idea of voting ellie last round. i think she thinks i can be a part of their voting block. I believe that me and Amy are smack dab in the middle of this and can realistically join either side
heres how i THINK the vote is gonna go tonight:
Ellie + Raffy + me + Amy voting JG JG + jinx + zo + maddison voting ellie
so....... did someone say rocks? :)
Zo
So the funny thing about me is I can go away for a nap for an hour and a half and come back and my name is off the block hdjsjdjjs
JG
youtube
Amy
honestly I just want to have fun so I'm being messy telling everyone everything 🤣 I will not be shocked if this gets flipped onto me but apparently Ellie Colin and raffy want me to vote out JG with them and jinx JG me zo? Maddison? will vote Ellie? I mean here's the problem I've played with Ellie enough to have assumed from the start they are with everyone (as I am 🤠) but the whole being in two opposing alliances wasn't grand with some people even though they chose to vote with the girlies but there's a concern about a swap and then being closer to Adeline than say I would be which would immediately put me more at risk of going home especially down numbers. Anyway tbh if raffy didn't flip his idea I would have voted zo out 100% and I already had my voting confessional planned.
Let's see though bc Colin wanted to make a group of me Ellie raffy and Colin to "fix communication" and force rocks lol and it hasn't been made so.... Would be a funny way to go
Oh also I can go on the other side of the idol hunt and made it directly to the other resort and was immediately barred from entry lol whoops where are these wristbands?
Colin
okay so tribal is in 50 minutes and everyone has been SO quiet today. like to a very stressful extent. i'm needing to take a step back and remember that as long as it aint me, i'm fine. I'm planning on voting JG, and honestly just because I think that everyone is so quiet, I don't see an actual organized effort happening against Ellie this round. JG and Zo seemed like they wanted to take her out, but no one's putting in the work to do so. i hope that means that ellie survives this round and JG gets out, which is what i've been trying to do since last round.
Ellie
Tell me why i power nap for 6 hours and wake up to the vote being for me
0 notes
leossmoonn · 4 years ago
Text
Play Ground Days
masterlist
pairing - carl gallagher x fem!reader
type - fluff
note / request - “ughh FINALLY someone that writes good imagines abt carl from shameless! could you write one where you two grew up together and you've always been close n stuff and then at some point he realizes he loves the reader and he talks to ian and lip (maybe mickey too bc i love him) about it? (fem!reader btw if that's cool) thanks babe xx” thanks for inspo on the beginning @poesflygirl​ <3 ,,, carl and you are 16 also pls dont come for me ive only played COD 2 times last year so lmao i dont remember a lot about it, enjoy!
summary - carl has liked you since you two were young, and seeks advice from his brothers and mickey
warnings - strong language, drugs and alcohol, little talk about bad body imagine 
————
*gif isnt mine*
Tumblr media
“I fucking knew it!” Lip exclaimed.
“Why are you telling us? We’ve known this.” Ian commented, smirking at his little brother.  
“How the hell—” Carl started. 
“You’re not exactly great at hiding your crush on her,” Mickey chuckled. 
Carl’s eyes were the size of saucers. “You knew?”
“Of course I did. I’m not fucking Helen Keller,” Mickey rolled his eyes. 
Carl groaned and ran his hands roughly through his hair. “I can’t believe this. Well, secret’s out, I guess. What do I do?”
“Just go tell her you like her. It’s not like she’s going to turn you down.” Lip shrugged, putting his cigarette to his lips. 
“Lip!” Ian hit his brother’s shoulder. 
“What?” Lip asked. 
“You weren’t supposed to say that, dumbass,” Mickey said.
 “What does that mean?” Carl asked, looking in-between his brother’s and Mickey. 
Lip sighed. “Ah, shit, right. I’ve already said too much.”
————
4 hours earlier: 2:00 PM
“Hey, shit head!” She called out, throwing rocks against the window. 
Carl got up from his bed, shocked but happy to see her. He opened his window, leaning against the frame. 
“What’re you doing here?” He asked.
She threw the rocks to the ground. “Escaping from my druggie dad, duh. What’re you doing?”
“Nothing,” Carl shrugged. 
She did her signature smirk that always made Carl’s heart flutter. “Wanna go and stuff our faces at Patsy’s Pies?”
Carl’s eyes lit up at the mention of fatty, greasy food. “Hell yeah. I’ll come down.”
She nodded, going to the front of their house. Carl ran down the stairs, putting on his shoes and opening the door to find her on the steps. 
“Hey, why didn’t you just come into the house?” Carl asked, shutting the door behind him. 
“Putting damage on your window seemed more fun. Oh, hey! Do you have an extra bed I can sleep in tonight?” She asked. 
Carl nodded. “Yeah, of course. Your dad is that bad, huh?”
“Yep, he relapsed. Super fun,” she laughed sarcastically. 
“I’m sorry. That shit sucks,” Carl said.
She shrugged. “Yeah, well, it’s life. Anyways, ready to go?”
Carl nodded. They got into her car, the girl starting it and driving fast to the dinner. As she was driving, humming to the songs on the radio, Carl stared at her. She was absolutely gorgeous. 
Her name was Y/n L/n. Carl’s oldest and only real friend. They had grown up together, Y/n living only a few houses away from him. They had met in detention in 1st grade and had been close ever since. 
“What’re you staring at?” Y/n asked, glancing over to him. 
Carl blushed. “Nothing.”
“Alright,” Y/n sang.
Carl had often been caught staring at her. It was something he usually did from time to time, but now it was more often. He couldn’t help it. There was something about her. Maybe flawless her skin was, how pretty and bright her smile and eyes were, the way she would make him feel secure and loved, something he had never got from anyone consitently. 
He never really knew why he thought those things about her. People had told him that he probably had a crush on her, but he knew that wasn’t right. He had crushes on girls before and the things he was feeling for Y/n were a lot different than what he had felt for his past girlfriends. He figured it was just that she was his closest friend and he happened to be a horny teenager, so naturally, he just thought those things about her. But oh, how wrong he actually was. 
Y/n parked her car at Patsy’s Pies. They walked into the diner, seeing Fiona at the register. 
“Hey, Fi,” Y/n smiled. 
“Hey, Y/n, Carl! Long time, no see. How are ya?” Fiona asked. 
“Good, good,” Y/n smiled. 
“Good,” Carl said. 
“Great! Well, get yourself seated and someone will be right with you,” she smiled. 
Y/n and walked off to a small booth and sat down. They picked up the menus that were already on the table. 
“You gonna get your usual?” Y/n asked. 
Carl shrugged. “Maybe. Should I change it up?”
“Yes. The double bacon cheeseburger looks good,” Y/n said. 
“Are you getting that?” Carl asked. 
“Maybe. I’ll probably get a salad or something. Gotta watch those calories, you know?” She half-joked, putting a hand on her stomach. 
“I think you look good. You don’t need to worry,” Carl smiled. 
Y/n’s eyes widened. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome,” Carl nodded. 
Y/n looked back at the menu, hiding her embarrassment.
Carl complimenting her was something that was rare, but did happen. Y/n never remembered Carl as a romantic type of guy, but it seems that he had developed  those traits from having a few girlfriends. She liked that, actually. She liked him complimenting her, staring at her for minutes at a time, the way his ears would turn red when she teased him. She liked all of that. 
Y/n would never admit it to anyone, but she had a crush on Carl. She had a crush on him since their freshman year of high school. Well, in reality, she probably has always had one, but the first time she really realised she liked him was in biology when he got in trouble in one of the labs. She remembered when the teacher was yelling at him and he looked at her, smiling at her mischievously and winking at her. That wink had her heart racing and mind go foggy. From then on, she had liked him as more than a friend. Yet, she never said anything because well, as cliche as it was, she was afraid of ruining their friendship. He was really the only one who got her and who never abandoned her. She couldn’t lose him, so she just kept her feelings and gestures to him as friendly as she could.  
“Hi, I’m Carly and I’ll be serving you today. What can I get you today?” The waitress asked. 
“Hi, can I get the philly cheesesteak with a medium coke and fries,” Carl ordered. 
Carly nodded and wrote his order down, turning to Y/n. 
“Um, I’ll get the bacon cheeseburger with a small sprite and fries. Thanks,” Y/n ordered. 
Carly took their menus. “Great. I’ll have your drinks out soon.”
Y/n and Carl smiled at the waitress as she walked away. 
“Hey, so I thought your dad was in rehab,” Carl said. 
Y/n sighed. “He was, but I guess his girlfriend got him drunk, then convinced him to do some lines. God, I can’t believe he's even with her still.”
Carl frowned. “What about your mom? Where’s she?”
“She’s going to nursing school right now. She’s the only one responsible in this family, yet she never calls or anything,” she scoffed.
“You’re really responsible,” Carl said. 
Y/n smiled. “Thanks, C. You are, too.”
Carl laughed, “Me? I sold drugs on the streets once.”
She giggled. “True. But you’ve really shaped. I'm proud.”
Carl smiled sheepishly. “Thanks.”
Y/n hummed a ‘you’re welcome’. Carly came back with their food quickly and they dug in. Carl and Y/n spent their time talking and eating, spending about 2 hours there as they just kept talking. 
“Are you two finished?” Carly asked, gesturing to their empty plates. 
“Yeah,” Carl nodded. 
“Great. Here’s your bill, pay whenever you’re ready,” Carly smiled and took their dirty dishes. 
“Ready to go?” Y/n asked. 
Carl nodded and got out his wallet that he had in his shorts. Meanwhile, Y/n also got out her wallet. They both looked up at each other, awkward expressions on their faces. 
“Oh, I was gonna pay,” Carl said. “No, no, my treat. I invited you here,” Y/n said. 
“You sure?” Carl asked. 
She smiled and put a hand on his arm. “Yes, I am, Carl.”
Butterflies irrupted in Carl’s stomach as she touched him. He nodded slowly, putting his credit card away. Y/n and him walked up to the register and paid for their meal. They then went back to Y/n car. 
“What do you wanna do now?” Y/n asked. 
“Wanna play COD Black Ops 3?” Carl asked. 
“Yes!” Y/n smiled. She drove them back to his house, parking haphazardly on the street. 
The two hurried into the house, grabbing a seat on the couch. Carl got the controllers, turning onto the playstation. Y/n logged onto her account, selecting the gun she wanted to use. Carl then started the game. 
“Where are you?” Y/n squinted her eyes at the screen. 
“Right behind you,” Carl smirked. 
Y/n turned around, gasping as Carl shot her. 
“Fuck you!” Y/n exclaimed. 
“Little rusty, huh?” Carl teased. She rolled her eyes. “I’m gonna kill you next round.”
“I’d like to see you try,” Carl said. 
“Winner gets to pick what’s for dinner,” Y/n said. 
“Deal,” Carl nodded. 
The pair played for a couple hours, the game ending with Y/n getting the last kill. 
“Good game,” she smirked, setting the controller down. 
“I forgot how good you were at this,” Carl frowned. Y/n giggled, “I forgot how bad you were.”
Carl rolled his eyes with a smile. “Alright, where do you want to eat?”
“Hm… Noodles n Company?” She suggested. 
“Sure,” Carl nodded. 
“Alright, I’m gonna use the bathroom and then order. Text me what you want,” Y/n said, getting up from the couch. 
Carl nodded and watched her go upstairs to use the bathroom. Then that’s when Lip, Ian, and Mickey all came into the house. 
“Hey, guys,” Carl said. 
“Hey,” Ian smiled. 
“Is Y/n here? We saw her car out front,” Lip said. “Yeah, she is,” Carl nodded. 
“Asked her out yet?” Lip smirked. Carl’s face turned red. “Wh-What?”
“Oh, you’re not in love with her then?” Ian furrowed his brows. 
“I… am I?” Carl asked. 
Ian chuckled. “Yeah. You always are always happy around her, blush whenever she teases you.”
“And you’re always staring at her,” Lip added.
“That doesn’t mean I like her,” Carl said.
“Do feel dizzy and nauseous when she touches you? Does your heart race when she gets close? Do you see yourself kissing her? Would you do anything for her?” Ian asked. 
Carl furrowed his brows. They were right, all those things did happen when she was near. She was his best friend. He also sometimes think about kissing her and being with her in a romantic way. And yeah, of course he would do anything for her. Maybe… Maybe he did love her. 
“Oh, shit,” he muttered. “I… I guess I am in love with her.”
And that, ladies and gents, is where we left off. Lip, Ian, and Mickey teased Carl until Carl begged them for real help. 
“What do you mean?” Carl asked anxiously. 
Lip looked to Ian and Mickey for help on what to say. Little did Carl know, Y/n actually did admit her crush to someone. And that someone, or someones, were Lip, Ian, and Mickey. 
“Don’t worry about it, man,” Mickey said. 
“Did she say something to you?” Carl asked. “No,” Ian shook his head. “Like Mick said, don’t worry.”
“I… fine. Well, what do I do then?” Carl asked in slight distress.
“Give her some flowers and chocolate. Girls love that shit,” Lip suggested. 
“Alright,” Carl nodded. “I don’t know what her favourite flowers are, though.”
“Just get her roses. That’s really romantic,” Lip said. 
Carl smiled, “Alright. Awesome. Thanks, guys.”
He decided to get the flowers early morning tomorrow before Y/n woke up. 
————
Carl sneaked back into the house, hoping not to wake Y/n up. As he walked into the kitchen, he was shocked to see her at the table drinking coffee. 
“Hey, Carl!” Y/n smiled. 
Carl’s eyes were blown wide. “I.. uh…”
“Who are those for?” Y/n got up and pointed to the flowers and chocolate in his hand. 
“Um… you?” Carl said. Y/n smiled. “Me? What did I do to deserve this?”
Carl knew that he couldn’t make up an excuse. He was horrible at lying to her. So, he decided to just have his confession here. 
“I.. I’m in love with you,” Carl said. Y/n’s jaw dropped and she froze. “Wha-What?”
“My brothers and Mickey helped me realise I was yesterday when you were ordering dinner. They told me I should get you flowers and stuff so I did. I hope you like roses,” Carl explained and held up the gifts. 
Y/n’s lips upturned in a wide smile. “How long have you liked me?”
“Honestly, probably since we were little,” Carl shrugged sheepishly. 
Y/n giggled. “Me, too.”
“Really?” Carl smiled. 
Y/n waked up to him and took the gifts, setting them on the kitchen counter. She went up to him and put her arms around his neck. 
“Yep. I always have,” she grinned. 
“Oh, sick!” Carl exclaimed. “Oh wait.”
“What?” Y/n asked in confusion. 
“That’s what they meant!” Carl exclaimed in realisation.
“Who? What?” “Oh, Lip, Mickey, and Ian kind of told me yesterday when I asked for help,” Carl explained. 
Y/n’s eyes widened and she turned to the stairs, glaring. “Mickey, Lip, Ian! You better fucking run!”  
————
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taglist (crossed out means i couldnt tag)
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mercy-burning · 4 years ago
Text
Pretty Please
Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: Reader hears something surprising from her next door neighbor, and it throws her off. Category: Smut 18+ (masturbation, thigh riding, penetrative sex, oral sex-male and female receiving, semi-rough sex, dom!Spencer) Word Count: 6.9k Warnings: Nothing except the smut listed above and strong language. As always, if there’s anything I missed, let me know what I should include in the warnings! I want to be as mindful as I can about what I post. Thank you!
PART 2 / PART 3 / PART 4 / EPILOGUE
***
There's no way she heard that right.
In fact, she was pretty sure she'd made it up. She was tired, delirious, and she'd only imagined hearing what she heard.
Right?
Just to be sure, Y/N sat up in bed, put her ear against the wall just above the headboard, and listened, concentrating as hard as she could to confirm or deny.
And sure enough, the next thing she heard was, "Fuck, yes!"
It was muffled, definitely not as loud as it could have been, but if things continued the way she thought they would, it was going to get louder. Unless, of course, her neighbor was mindful, knowing that someone could probably hear what was going on. Though, for some reason Y/N doubted that.
Just to be extra sure what was happening, she stayed glued to the wall, listening carefully.
There was some muffled movement, but it could have been just about anything. Nonetheless, her heart was beating so fast, and it beat even faster when she heard what came next.
A loud female moan, unmistakable and utterly pornographic, made Y/N close her eyes immediately, her heart practically jumping out of her chest. Her first thought was Okay, he's watching porn. Everyone does that. Not without headphones, but it's completely normal and I should stop eavesdropping and go about my own life because this is an invasion of privacy.
Her second thought was ...Oh.
Because she was dead wrong.
The next thing that sounded through the walls was, "Yes, Spencer, just like that!"
Y/N's eyes shot open and she almost had a heart attack.
Her next thought was Good for him...
She and her neighbor hadn't really gotten to know each other that well. All she knew was that he had a job that kept him away from home quite a bit, either from travel or just late nights. He was shy and rarely talked to her when they met in the halls or in the parking garage, or even in the laundry room. Which is why it was so surprising to Y/N that he was having sex—and decent sex at that, from what she could hear—right next door.
Not that it would have been impossible for him to get it, of course. He was hot as hell, and it shouldn't have surprised Y/N as much as it did that she was hearing what she was hearing. It had just never happened before.
She was about to let it be, glad that her neighbor seemed to be having some fun, and it truly wasn't any of her business what he decided to do in his spare time. Though, the next thing she heard sent her into a tailspin.
"You like that, baby? You like when I hold you down and fuck you?"
Y/N almost hit her head against the wall. Instinctually her legs crossed, as if it would prevent her from being turned on. Which was stupid, considering every nerve in her body was on fire hearing those words come from Spencer Reid's mouth.
No fucking way, Y/N thought, slowly shifting her position on the bed.
It was a stupid idea. Probably one of the dumbest things she's ever done. But she closed her eyes, and as the woman's moans became louder through the walls, every slap of skin on skin getting louder with them, Y/N's right hand drifted under the waistband of her panties and got to work.
She couldn't help imagining what was going on. And it was rare that she could get off on just imagination alone, but this time she had the helpful addition of sound to aid her. Every time the woman moaned Spencer's name, she moved her fingers faster, alternating between rubbing her clit and completely fingering herself. And sometimes Y/N would make inevitable tiny whimpers of her own, careful not to give herself away.
She was almost to her climax when she heard it. The thing that pushed her over the edge.
"Fuck, you take it so well, pretty girl."
That one sentence, added to the impending orgasm Y/N was experiencing and the fact that she was picturing Spencer's face so clearly in her head, caused her to let out a loud moan and throw her head back against the wall with a loud thud.
So many feelings happened at once. Pain, because fuck, hitting her head on the wall without expecting it hurt like hell. Pleasure immediately after, because despite everything, her fingers stayed working, instinctively nursing herself through her orgasm. And finally embarrassment, because she definitely shouldn't have been eavesdropping on her neighbor's sexual encounters and she's positive they'd heard her intrusion.
All noises ceased for a total of two seconds before Y/N came down from her high and the sex next door resumed like nothing had happened.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck, no, Y/N thought as she scrambled out of bed and ran to the bathroom. Her head still hurt from hitting it against the wall, but that was the least of her concerns. More than anything she wanted to crawl in a hole and never return. And sure, maybe there was a small chance Spencer and his.. friend hadn't heard you, but it was practically impossible. There was no way they hadn't heard it.
Y/N peed and washed her hands, tapping her foot nervously against the cool tile the whole time. Eventually she calmed her breathing and decided that she'd just have to live with it. I mean, it's not like I'm friends with him anyway, she thought. I barely see him enough as it is, and I can ignore him like there's no tomorrow and nothing will change. Right?
And so she washed her face and got ready for bed, trying desperately not to think about how badly she'd embarrassed herself.
And then as she curled under the covers (with earbuds in just in case) she thought, Maybe I'll make him some muffins tomorrow and say I'm sorry.
The last thing she saw before she closed her eyes was Spencer's face.
***
"What's wrong? Can't take it?"
She practically burned with pleasure, every inch of her body overly sensitive and completely fucked out. But she'd let him have whatever he wanted.
She cried. She tried to tell him that yes, she could take it. But tears and strangled moans were all she could manage as he continued to fuck her into the mattress.
"You gonna cum?" He asked, like she could form words.
She cried out again in answer.
He leaned forward, wiping tears from her face, and whispered, "Go ahead, pretty girl."
That was the last thing Y/N heard before she woke up, eyes shooting open and hands clutching the sheets so tightly her fingers ached. She let them go and tried to wiggle them back to life, squeezing her eyes shut and taking a deep breath.
"Oh, dear Lord," she muttered, stretching out and realizing that the past 10 hours of her life were going to haunt her for a long time.
I'm gonna have to move, aren't I, she thought sarcastically, sitting up slowly and rubbing her eyes. Though, right now it sounded like a good idea.
Y/N gathered some clothes and went to the shower, refusing to think about last night or the dream she'd woken up from. Instead she lasered all her attention to thoroughly washing her hair, body, and face. By the time the water was running cold, she stepped out, dried off and got dressed, brushing her teeth and then leaving the bathroom to turn on the coffee pot.
Before she could, there was a knock on the door.
Oh no, was her first thought, because naturally the first thing you do at any minor event after severely embarrassing yourself is panic. What if that's him? He's going to get mad at me for eavesdropping. The first thing I'm going to do when I see him is blush and panic. Fuck.
Y/N thought about ignoring it for a second. For all Spencer knew, she could still be sleeping. She could have fled the country immediately after giving herself away. She could have died from a heart attack, literally embarrassing herself to death. She could ha—
Knock knock knock.
"Shit," Y/N muttered to herself, adjusting her freshly-washed hair and praying she looked okay. If it really was Spencer at her door, she wanted to at least look like she was moving on with her life and not thinking about last night every waking second.
She ran to the door, took a deep breath and opened it, sure enough revealing Spencer Reid in her doorway, wearing a kind smile and holding a small something in his hand.
"Oh... Spencer, hi," Y/N said, pretending to be happy. Not that she wasn't ever happy to see him, but today of all days was most definitely not a good time. She only prayed he wouldn't get mad at her for eavesdropping.
"Hi, Y/N. Sorry for being here so early, but I, uh... thought you might need this."
He handed her what was in his hand, and it rattled, confusing her. She took it and flipped it over in her hands, studying the bottle.
"Advil?"
"Yeah. Seems like you hit your head on the wall pretty hard last night, I just wanted to make sure you were okay."
Her stomach dropped. "No."
"No... You're not okay, or no, you don't need it?"
Heat rushed to Y/N's cheeks and all she could manage was another, "No."
She only sounded slightly terrified.
But before Spencer could say anything else, Y/N looked up at him and almost started to cry. "I'm so so so sorry, Spencer, I didn't mean to hear, it just happened, and I couldn't help it, and I tried to be quiet, I really did, but it just slipped, and I feel really bad, I'm so sorry, I—"
"Whoa, whoa, Y/N, slow down. It's okay, really," he laughed. "I'm not upset or anything, I just... Truthfully I feel kind of bad for not thinking of anyone hearing. I didn't realize the walls were so thin, and had I known I probably would have... Gone about things differently. I didn't mean to embarrass you."
Y/N's heart raced, but she was even more shocked by the fact that he was apologizing. "Spencer, don't be sorry. I embarrassed myself, really. I shouldn't have been listening anyway— what you do in your apartment isn't any of my business, and I messed up."
He smiled and shuffled on his feet, trying to avoid looking at you but failing. In the end he shrugged and leaned against the doorframe. "Well, in any case, I really do hope your head doesn't hurt too bad. That was a loud thump."
Y/N laughed nervously, turning the bottle over in her hands while looking at the floor. "It doesn't hurt anymore. Feels better now that I've slept it off... Thank you, though. I... I appreciate it."
"You're welcome."
She looked up at him and almost started crying again, still completely embarrassed over the whole ordeal. In an attempt to not cry, she cleared her throat. "Um, I was just going put on some coffee if you... wanted to come in? I can make some eggs or something too, if you're hungry. Y'know, to say I'm sorry?"
Spencer looked like he was about to tell her not to be sorry again, but she gave him a look that said don't you dare, and he settled on nodding instead. "Sure, I'd like that."
***
"Wow. These are great."
Y/N smiled, watching Spencer eat a bite of the eggs she'd made him. "Thank you. It's a family recipe. Nothing too special, but my mom always made them for my brother and I before our first day of school every year."
He smiled. "That's nice. Really, they're great. Thank you."
"Yeah, no problem... Look, again, I really am so—"
"Y/N, stop. It's okay, really. It... happens. You don't have to be sorry."
She nodded before taking a sip of her coffee. Spencer ate some more of his eggs and the two of them sat in silence for a few minutes, before it got completely unbearable.
She didn't want to keep bringing it up, but something forced the words out of her mouth. "So, your... guest... Is she your girlfriend?"
It took Spencer a minute to realize what she said, but eventually he cleared his throat, some color forming on his cheeks. "Oh, uh... no. No, I'm single. She and I had just met at a bar downtown. I don't usually do that. Go to bars, I mean. Though I suppose I don't really have one night stands all that often, either, but my co-workers and I were out last night after a... pretty rough day at work, and... before I left we met at the bar and it just kind of went on from there."
"Oh... Well, I... I'm sorry work was rough. Seems like you... handled it, though. Got over it... I mean, like, you knew how to take your mind off of it, or make it better or whatever."
Y/N froze after she said it. Immediately after, she shook her head. "God, I'm sorry. That was dumb. I shouldn't have said that."
"No, I get what you mean, it's okay, really," Spencer said quickly, seemingly amused. "It, uh... It really did help. You know, sex is a good stress reliever. The endorphins it releases puts you in a better mood and calms you down, and studies show that regular sexual activity can aid in decreasing high blood pressure during stressful situations."
"I... didn't know that. Sounds helpful. Especially with your job, I imagine."
He nodded, taking a sip of his coffee. "What about you? Is your job stressful?"
Y/N shrugged, kind of glad that the conversation moved away from sexual nature. Though, she supposed the reason it was there in the first place was kind of her fault. In any case, she told Spencer about her job. "It's not as stressful as other jobs can be, but I just got a promotion so all the responsibility is a little daunting, I guess."
"I'm sure you're fine," he complimented, setting his mug down. "Though... If you do ever find yourself beginning to buckle under the stress of your job, sex is a good way to keep your spirits up."
It was a joke. A reference to their conversation, the whole reason they were in this moment in the first place. So why did Y/N respond with, "What, is that your way of offering?"
I'm just full of stupid shit lately, aren't I, she thought, immediately hating herself for saying it. Things were going well, and Spencer didn't seem mad or annoyed after the whole incident, and now she was positive she'd made everything worse.
But nothing could have prepared her for what came out of his mouth next.
"Maybe it is."
She looked up at him and saw that he was completely serious. His eyes bore into her, staring her down like he was trying to compel her to say something, to do something, to put her under his spell. Y/N swallowed, trying to speak, but nothing would come out.
Oh, now you have nothing to say? Good going, Y/N...
Nevertheless, he waited. His eyes remained glued on her, tilting his head to the side and raising his eyebrows as if to ask her, well?
Eventually, she settled on, "You mean it?"
Spencer nodded slowly, staring at her with an intensity she hadn't experienced in forever. "Only if you want to."
Immediately Y/N thought back to last night. His nasty words replayed in her ears over and over again, repeating themselves like a mantra— You like that, baby? You like when I hold you down and fuck you?
And under his burning gaze, Y/N felt like she was on fire. Her lower stomach bubbled over with desire and she imagined him fucking her like he had in her dream.
It's almost like he knew what she was thinking about. Because right before she could tell him she wanted him, he laughed softly to himself. "What are you thinking about, Y/N?"
Her name on his lips sent shivers down her spine. "W... What?"
"Tell me. You're thinking about having sex with me right now, aren't you?"
She could barely breathe. But she managed to get out a strangled, "Yes."
Spencer smirked and stood up, walking around the table but never taking his eyes off Y/N. She swallowed and stood up too, meeting his eyes and tilting her head up to look at him— really look at him. His pupils were full-blown, his lips formed into an amused smile as he reached out to touch her face. She fluttered her eyes closed and leaned into his touch, a small sigh involuntarily escaping her lips.
"How long have you been thinking about me?" Spencer asked quietly, yet the tone in his voice rather demanded an answer more than asked for one.
Y/N opened her eyes to meet his, and almost crumbled under the weight of their intensity. "S-since last night."
He hummed in response, running his thumb over her chin and up to her lips, just barely touching them. "Have you ever thought about it before then?"
She couldn't lie to him. "A few times."
That got a full smile out of him, but it disappeared rather quickly as he stepped even closer and gripped the side of Y/N's face in his right hand, his fingers barely weaving through the hair behind her ear. She gasped and looked up at him, silently begging for him to kiss her. To push her onto the table, or choke her, or something.
"Tell me what you want," he demanded, keeping that even, soft tone. It sent another chill through Y/N's body.
She could hardly breathe. Could hardly form words.
Spencer slipped his hand behind her head and gripped the underside of her damp hair, tugging slightly as she whimpered. "What do you want?"
"I want you to fuck me," Y/N gasped out, completely and utterly entranced by his looming presence.
"Now?" he asked, his own way of really making sure she wanted to go through with this.
"Yes," she breathed. "Yes, please, fuck me. Please."
The look he gave her after she said it was purely dirty and unlike any thing she'd ever experienced. She decided then and there that if that was the reaction she'd get from him for begging, she would beg him for anything any time.
Not to mention, the way he kissed her was enough to make any man or woman fly into the sun. Both of his hands found themselves lost in her hair, pulling her head to his and practically massaging her scalp as he glided his lips across hers with a slow burning fever that made Y/N's body completely succumb to him. She melted into him, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him closer, reaching up to twist her fingers through the ends of his hair, admiring how soft and perfect it felt on her skin. Once Spencer's tongue swiped over her bottom lip and softly pushed into her mouth, it was well and truly over. Y/N was done for. He could do anything he wanted and she wouldn't turn him away.
He pulled away for a moment, taking her bottom lip between his teeth before moving back in and angling his head in the other direction, kissing her deeper and causing a groan to slip from her throat.
Y/N desperately clung to his neck, wishing he could do this to her forever, but then he took one of his hands away from her head and brought it to her lower back. He completely pulled her against him, one of his legs slipping between hers and putting the slightest bit of pressure to her crotch.
She whimpered, causing Spencer to push himself against her harder, the two of them completely attached. He brought his knee up just a little, and Y/N instinctively ground against it, desperately wanting to feel any type of friction she could manage. It warmed her whole body to the core, being completely embraced by him, and in a matter of seconds she was more desperate than she'd ever been.
She pulled her face away from his reluctantly, breathing heavily and still grinding against his leg. "Please," was all the could think to say.
"Such a needy little thing, aren't you?" Spencer whispered, peppering her neck with wet kisses as he brought his leg up higher, giving her more access. He leaned his butt against the table for support, until eventually he gave in and sat down on it, bringing her down to sit on his thigh.
Y/N hesitated, halting her movements for a second before he gripped her hips and moved them forward. "Go ahead, pretty girl. Ride my thigh."
She groaned at the nickname and obliged happily, grinding down and rocking her hips against him. He continued to kiss her neck, occasionally biting down and sucking at different spots, sure to leave marks.
He hadn't even really touched her yet, and Y/N was absolutely dizzy, high on kisses and his hands burning into her hips. She felt her stomach start to coil as an orgasm came to the surface, her legs clenching tighter around him.
"You close, baby?" Spencer muttered against her neck, right under her ear. He took her earlobe between his teeth for just a moment before rocking her hips faster, bringing his leg up just a bit higher to aid her. She shoved her head into his neck and cried out his name, somewhere between a whine and a moan.
Within a matter of seconds Y/N was shaking around him, panting his name over and over while he brought his leg just a tad higher, bringing her over the edge. Her mind raced, coming to terms with what just happened and what was about to happen, and it made her tremble again, sending one more shockwave through her lower body before her hips slowed to a stop.
Spencer slid his hands back up to her head, bringing her face to his once more and kissing her. As if she wasn't already so out of breath. But it didn't matter. She only cared about his mouth and the way it captured hers like it belonged there, like it knew she was his for the taking. And she really believed that was true.
Y/N still straddled his leg, but she wanted to give him the same release he'd given her, so she attempted to climb away and moved one of her hands down to his belt.
Spencer stopped her hand and pulled his face away from hers. For a moment she thought she'd done something wrong, and she was about to apologize, but he pulled her close and stroked her hair with his hand, tilting his head to meet her gaze. "Not yet, pretty girl. I want to taste you first."
And without another second passing by, he moved the hand that grabbed her wrist between them and snuck it into her shorts and panties. Y/N jumped a little, but only because it felt too good for her own good. Her eyes fluttered shut when his middle finger grazed her clit, but his other hand gripped her chin and forced her to look at him. "No. I want you to look at me, okay?"
She nodded, and then whimpered when he slipped a finger inside of her. She lifted herself up just a little so he had more access, and sure enough his finger slipped in and out with ease.
She wanted more, but he took his hand away, and the glimmer in his eye when she pouted, visibly frustrated, sent her into another small fit of tremors.
"So antsy, pretty girl," Spencer laughed, slightly amused. Y/N would have said something, but all words escaped her when he brought his fingers to his mouth. His tongue poked out to taste-test before he completely took them in, holding eye contact with her the whole time. As he sucked his fingers clean, Y/N felt herself growing desperate again, and she ground against his leg once more.
Spencer laughed and brought his fingers out of his mouth, resting them on her hips. "You're being awfully quiet, Y/N."
"I... I don't... Is that a bad thing?"
"Not necessarily. But you didn't have a problem being loud last night."
It brought color to her cheeks. Her first instinct was to apologize but she knew he'd chastise her for it, so she didn't. Rather, she embraced the opportunity and pulled herself closer to him. "Is that what you want, Spencer? You want me to be loud for you?" Her voice was soft, somewhat contradicting what she was saying, but she looked at him through her eyelashes, biting her lip as if asking for permission.
And now it seemed like it was his turn to groan, though it came out as more of a growl as he pushed her away from him, grabbing her arm and leading her through the apartment. All the rooms were built the same so he knew where to go. He didn't take the time to scan her room, though if he did it was fast. Y/N barely had any time to react before he pulled her to him again and kissed her roughly.
As his fingers weaved through her hair again, Y/N decided to take a chance, snaking her hands down to his belt. This time he didn't stop her, his lips opening and granting her access to his tongue as she unbuckled the belt. She unzipped his pants and pushed them down his hips, but they only got about an inch down before he pulled away from her completely, leaving her empty again.
She whined, and he smirked.
"What is it, Y/N?" he asked. "What do you want?" His tone was almost condescending, like he knew exactly what she wanted.
She didn't like being teased. "I just want you," she stated, whining a bit to prove her point.
He seemed to contemplate his words for a moment before he spoke. "And... you think I should just give you what you want? After I caught you eavesdropping on me last night?"
He was only saying it to see her flushed. To embarrass her and make her shy so he could make it better in the end. She knew that, knew better, and yet it still worked. "I'm sorry," she pleaded, getting down on her knees in front of him and looking up at him with just as much desperation as she could manage. "You know I feel really really bad about it, just please let me make it up to you. Please, Spencer."
When all he did was look down at her, amused and still, Y/N batted her eyelashes and grabbed the waistband of his pants and underwear. She waited to pull them down until he did or said something, but all he did was stare. She couldn't tell if he was making her wait or if he was waiting for her, and she was afraid of making the wrong decision. But, deciding that she'd been in enough trouble in the past 10 hours to last a lifetime, Y/N took a chance yet again and pulled Spencer's pants all the way down.
Still unsure of what would happen if she continued, Y/N scooted closer, but kept her eyes locked on his. She batted her eyelashes and ran her hands up his thighs, eventually wrapping around to his ass. She brought them up his lower back and around to feel his stomach before sliding down to the front of his hips. She stopped them there, gliding her thumbs over his skin in small circles as she pleaded once more for good measure.
"Pretty please."
Spencer gave in, bringing his hands to her hair and pulling her close. "It's all yours, baby."
The words sent heat straight to her lower half as she flicked her tongue out to taste the head of his cock. His eyes fluttered shut at the contact, and Y/N took that as her opening. She looked down and marveled at him as she took him completely in her mouth, slowly but surely, getting herself acquainted with his size.
Once she set a steady pace, she looked up at him and found that he was absolutely wonderstruck. His eyes practically sparkled as they fixed on her, his bottom lip tucked between his teeth in pure adoration and fascination. Y/N took this as encouragement, bobbing her head faster and slacking her jaw as she let him hit the back of her throat with each thrust forward. She gagged once and pulled herself off, bringing her hand up to jerk him for a few seconds before using her mouth again. This was a cycle that continued until tears were streaming down her cheeks and spit was leaking down her chin, and every time she looked up at him, Spencer would groan and tighten his grip in her hair.
Eventually he stopped her, pulling her off of him and panting. "Come here," he whispered, and Y/N got up off her knees, standing up and wiping some of the spit from her face. It didn't feel all that sexy as she was doing it, though the way he looked at her made her feel like she was the only thing in the entire world that could bring him joy.
He reached forward and wiped some of the tears from her cheek before kissing her, groaning into her mouth as he did so. His still hard cock pressed against her leg, and she groaned, too, before he pulled away.
That dark glimmer returned in his eye when he spoke. "Take your clothes off."
Y/N didn't have to be told twice. Immediately she threw her shirt off over her head and tossed it to the ground as Spencer stepped out of his pants. His eyes travelled down to her breasts and she noticed him swallow, his Adam's apple bobbing a few times before he looked back up at her face. Keeping eye contact and softly biting her lip, Y/N hooked her fingers around her shorts and underwear and slid them down her legs until they reached the other clothes on the floor. She kicked them to the side and tilted her head up.
She thought he might kiss her again, but instead he nodded his head towards her bed. "Lay down on your back."
As Y/N had learned pretty early on, she was quick and eager to obey, and so she did as she was told, laying down in the middle of the bed, her head resting on her pillows and the rest of her body laying flat, eagerly awaiting Spencer's next move.
She watched him as he took his shirt off, leaving him completely bare, and before she had time to admire him, he bent down and grabbed something from his pants.
A condom, Y/N realized as he made his way to her.
"You really came over with the intent to fuck me, didn't you?" she mused, unable to stop herself.
He laughed at her words, climbing over her and leaning down to press his lips to her neck in a soft kiss. "Wasn't it obvious?"
No, she thought to herself, but she didn't say anything. Though even if she wanted to, she couldn't have, because Spencer's mouth moved down her neck and to her chest. He licked a small circle over her right nipple before enclosing it entirely in his mouth, and Y/N arched her back off the bed, running her fingers through his hair.
He laughed again, taking her nipple in between his teeth before releasing it and saying, "I love how fucking responsive you are, pretty girl."
Everything about what he was saying and doing to her sent Y/N into a tailspin. Before she had time to respond, he moved his mouth to her other breast and got right to work, repeating the process.
One of his hands trailed down her body, just light enough to leave goosebumps it its wake, until it reached where she really wanted him. As if to prove his last statement, Y/N's hips bucked upwards to feel more of him, and Spencer laughed against her chest, removing his mouth from her and using both of his hands to steady her hips, pushing them into the mattress. "Can you be still for me? Use your words."
Y/N sighs and bites her lip before answering. "Yes. I can be still."
"Louder, Y/N. You promised you'd be loud for me, remember?"
If she wasn't wet before, she definitely was now. And she thought about just repeating her words louder, like she was expected to, but then something in that stupid part of her brain said to push her luck. And so she laughed back at him.
"No, I didn't."
Spencer seemed shocked. This was the first time she'd blatantly disagreed with something he said. "What?"
He seemed a little mad, but Y/N acted innocent. "Well, I asked you if you'd like me to be loud for you, and you just pulled me in here. You didn't answer me, and I didn't promise anything."
She was scared of what he would do or say, but that turned her on even more.
And without warning, Spencer jammed two of his fingers into her mouth, forcing it open and pressing them down on her tongue. "Well, sweetheart, this is me telling you. You're gonna scream my name until the whole city can hear how needy you are for me."
She almost choked on his fingers, but he took them out and slid them down her chin and neck, leaving her completely breathless. He waited a beat before laughing to himself. "Aw, see? Look what I do to you, pretty girl," he mused. "You're so submissive."
Y/N wanted to argue, but she wanted him more, so she whined and tried to move him closer, to which he laughed again and caressed her face. "That's what I thought. Now be a good girl and wait a second while I put this on, okay?"
For fear of disappointing him, Y/N replied with, "Okay," loud and clear.
He smirked, unwrapping the condom and starting to slide it over himself. "Fast learner."
And in an attempt to patch things over even more, she batted her eyes like she knew he liked, acting patient and innocent though she was pretty sure they both knew she was the exact opposite.
It paid off in the end though, because Spencer rewarded her with a sweet kiss as he ran the tip of his cock over her pussy, just barely entering. He teased her like that for about a minute before she started to get antsy, and yet he didn't let up. He raised an eyebrow at her, and catching on she reached up, grabbing the sides of his face and blinking once before talking. "Please, Spencer. Fuck me."
"Atta girl," he praised before moving forward and entering her. Immediately Y/N moaned, her mouth open and eyes just about rolling to the back of her head. Her hands slid up his face and through his hair, weaving her fingers through the soft waves as he set a steady pace, letting themselves get used to the feeling of being wrapped up in each other like this. For a moment it seemed like he forgot his promise to fuck her so hard the whole city would hear her screaming his name, but after a while, he apparently decided that she wasn't being loud enough.
"Come on, Y/N. You can do better than that."
She wanted more than anything to tell him that if he fucked her harder then maybe she would be louder, but infinitely realized that A) that was a surefire way to get chastised, and B) if she was louder, he would fuck her harder. He was going to make her work for it, and in the end she didn't mind that at all.
So she told the truth. "Fuck, Spencer, you feel so goo— ahh!"
Almost as soon as the words left her mouth, he quickly adjusted and fucked her faster, and aside from the overstimulation, it was starting to feel reminiscent of the dream she'd had last night. She wasn't crying but she felt like she could, every fiber of her being burning alive with pleasure. She felt her orgasm rising to the surface, but she didn't want this to end yet. Maybe if she was lucky Spencer would keep going after she'd finished, though at this point she was just happy to let him fuck her for any period of time.
That being said, he slowed his movements, making each stroke harder and more deliberate, and Y/N yelled out his name, hoping to get more.
"You close, pretty girl? Hmm? You wanna cum?"
The strain in his voice sent another wave of pleasure coursing through her body. He was close too, she just knew it.
"Yes," she breathed, before repeating it louder and louder. "Yes, yes, yes!"
She was just about to fall over the edge when Spencer laughed and pulled out of her, leaving her unsatisfied, empty, and confused.
"What?" she breathed, looking up at him.
He slid the condom off and tossed it aside before jerking himself off over her stomach. "Only good girls get to cum. You should have thought of that before you eavesdropped on me."
And then he came all over her stomach and chest. She would have been more angry, but the whole sight in front of her was hot as hell. Who was she to complain? She watched as his face scrunched up in pleasure, his mouth agape and eyes squeezed shut. His hair faintly stuck to his face, and his hips jerked into his hand until eventually he was spent.
Y/N whined at the sight, completely turned on feeling his warm cum coating her skin and also utterly frustrated for not getting off.
Spencer opened his eyes to look at her, and she thought in that moment it looked like he would burst into flames. As his gaze raked over her body, covered in his cum and so obviously desperate for release, he licked his lips and got down, spreading her legs wider and opening her up to him.
"Wha—"
Y/N didn't get to finish her thought, because Spencer was immediately eating her out like a man starved, running his tongue through her pussy, occasionally flicking it over her clit. As expected, the louder she got the more he gave her, and at one point he started fingering her at a relentless pace, curling his fingers up against her g-spot while circling her clit with his tongue.
He brought his head up and looked at her through his eyelashes as best as he could, barely catching a glimpse of her face, completely contorted in pleasure.
"You wanna cum, pretty girl?" he teased, slowing his fingers torturously.
She whined and then threw her head back, pleading. "Spencer, please!"
He only got a little faster and then gently flicked his tongue over her clit again, to which she yelped and fisted the sheets.
In turn he moved faster. And she got louder. Faster and louder, faster and louder, until finally he gave her what she wanted.
"That's it, pretty girl. Cum for me."
Right after he said it, Y/N arched her back off the bed and fisted the sheets even harder, actually screaming his name until it came out as incoherent sobs, eventually dwindling down to whimpering and panting as he aided her down from her high.
Spencer's movements slowed to a stop, pulling his fingers out of her and pressing one final kiss to her clit before removing himself from her completely and coming up to lay down beside her.
She stayed there on her back, arms clutched at her sides, breathing deep and eyes almost heavy like she was about to fall asleep. He brushed her hair away from her face and pressed a kiss to her lips. She could taste herself on him, and it excited her. When he pulled away, she turned her head to look at him and smiled.
"I'm definitely going to have to invade your privacy more often if this is what the end result is."
Spencer laughed, his hand brushing lightly through her hair. "So that was okay? I'm sorry if I was kind of mean, I—"
"I'm gonna stop you right there. If I was really truly mad about anything you did, I would have screamed at you, not for you. Trust me. You're just fine. That was... perfect."
"Good... And you know I was just teasing you about eavesdropping, right? I'm not actually upset about it."
"No, I know. I still feel kinda bad about it though."
"Well, you shouldn't. If anything... something good came out of it, right?"
Y/N laughed, scrunching her nose as he looked at her. "Right."
After a moment, Spencer sat up and looked down at her stomach, a smirk on his face. "I'm gonna go get you a washcloth."
"Good thinking. And while you're at it could you also grab the Advil?"
He was on his way out the bedroom door, slipping on his underwear before stopping in his tracks. "Oh no... I- I didn't hurt you did I?"
"Oh! No, you didn't. I just know that I'm going to be sore, and walking will most definitely be a problem. And I am not getting out of this bed for the rest of the day, so Advil will definitely help. Thank you for that, by the way."
Spencer laughed, leaving Y/N to admire him as he walked away.
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memberment · 4 months ago
Text
Genesis
Goooooooooodmorning.
Idk why I'm making a post yet I really don't feel like writing. ANYWAYS. Updates may come today. They also may not. Idk yet.
6:51 Hello from beyond. A new playlist is being born as I write through chapter 30. Also, I think I finished my chapter 7 art. It's Craig carrying Tweek home after they first met. They were so cute 😭 Idk what the message is gonna be in that one yet though. I know what the response is, but not the og message. And I am realizing as I type that that I was not supposed to reveal that but fuck it we ball there's like six people on here it's okay.
ANYWAYS. IF I CAN FINISH 30 AND ACTUALLY WRITE 27 (due to a restructure, I skipped over it entirely and have to go back and rewrite it.) AND MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, CIRCLE BACK AND FINISH 22, I will be soooooooo happy. I got like 12 hours til sleep time and I prob will not be working on chapter 8 art. Because I do NOT wanna draw Kenny and Clyde just yet. (I'm afraid. I wanna put them in their magical girl uniforms and ACTUALLY SHOW THEIR UNIFORMS bc they do change eventually and I feel like the contrast goes INSANE.)
9:19: Hello friends totally didn't get distracted<3 ANYWAYS. Back to this hell chapter of everyone having a bad time.
1:38: I got so distracted Desolation was late and I didn't write anything. I have literally written under 1k today which is fucking insane to me. I write more when I'm "on breaks"
But I have come here to yap about something. While I'm "on break" I think I'm going to rework The End Is Near AND New Beginnings. Meaning they might get deleted for a bit. Because I kinda wanna redo them both because let's be so real here. My writing was not shit, but I feel like they are both gems that need a bit of love. I don't know if I'm gonna commit to the bit but I really fucking might LMFAOO.
But I do really want to redo New Beginnings because that was the whole reason I started writing fanfic and people are still looking at it and I feel like it pales in comparison to what I write now.
And reworking those two will be much more lax while I suffer through 15 weeks of physics hell. SOOO.
Whatever. Gonna try and get through chapter 30. and maybe 27 BECAUSE I STILL HAVE TO WRITE IT WHAT THE FUCK‼️‼️
I lied I'm yapping for all of five more seconds because I need to complain and refuse to get a diary.
I am actually really sad that I'm not gonna have every day posts anymore. Like I am trying so hard to cope with it but y'all.
Desolation has 4 chapters left. Tweek's Guide has 7 chapters left. Eclipse has 4 (technically five but epilogue's short so it's gonna get posted same day) chapters left. Craig's Guide has like 10 chapters left. Dandelion has 8 (technically 9) chapters left. and Leap year has 8 chapters left. (Genesis doesn't count because that just started. ) LIKE HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO COPE. I HAVE FOUR FICS AND THERE ARE SEVEN DAYS OF THE WEEK. AND I CAN'T POST MY ONE REALLY FUNNY TRASHFIRE FIC BC PART OF IT IS SO GOOD I KINDA WANNA SPLIT THE CONCEPTS UP AND I REFUSE TO FINISH IT TIL I GET MY SHIT TOGETHER. Like y'all do not understand daily posts are like embedded in my brain. I love it. HOW DO I FIX THIS WITHOUT ACTIVELY WRITING. I hate it here. Oh also when Eclipse or Desolation get finished Dandelion is moving to Monday/Wednesdays because Freedom Pal Fridays are being a thing. Because I have. So. Many. Goddamn. Freedom. Pals. Fics. Sitting. There. ScREAMING. For. Me. To. Write. So An Answers getting thrown on Fridays. But how do I space this out? (I am so sorry for this unnecessary lengthiness I am officially just gaming this out as I type because my brother is sleeping and I can't call him to yap.) Like- I wanted to do Sunday for Genesis but I feel like Sundays kinda suck as post days, lowk. So what then? Monday Wednesday Friday Saturday???? I can't just do Tuesday and not Thursday. AH. I hate it here. I need more time and we are constantly running out of time.
Life is fleeting, and I simply hate it.
2:39: JUST HIT 90K. This has been cut down to 38 chapters. I have 1k ish left of 30. 27 is still undone. 22 needs its angel fight. So approximately 29k-36k ish left. I'm losing my mind. I can't believe I am speedballing through this like that. WHICH MEANS IF GOD SHINES DOWN UPON ME I CAN FINISH BOUND IN PEACE.
Then what?
Do I start my break early?
I don't wanna do that? What the fuck would I even work on then though??????
LMFAO about to pray for clarity.
3:44: Creative freedom is fucking crazy because Wendy's having a heart to heart with Brimmy right now.
4:14: I keep cutting chapters and part of me is starting to worry that this is too short but in the same breath like I'm combining them because drawing them out feels kinda lazy and rude. But we are now down to 36/37 chapters. I can't be too mad about it. But part two might be like, way longer. Also we're at 92.3k. SO I DID SOMETHING TODAY.
I lowk wanna work on bound for a bit but that means committing myself to an entire chapter because I can't just write part of a chapter and go back to it for that one and kinda I wanna reread the whole thing before I work on it more. UGH.
I might. I honestly fucking love Bound, like that was my baby when I was concepting it. I literally wrote so much of it while I was on vacation. Like stats on that one suck bc it's so niche but I do not even care. One of my favorite fics that I've written, easy. I'm not even a K2 girlie. I just wanted to write one because it was gonna annoy me if I didn't throw my hat in the ring at least once. I might write background K2 though for something unimportant bc I kinda like how I write them ngl. OKAY GOODBYE FOR NOW I'VE CONVINCED MYSELF TO MAYBE WRITE ANOTHER BOUND CHAPTER.
8 notes · View notes
timextoxhajima · 3 years ago
Note
hi dana.. if it’s possible can i request some angsty wangsty based on niki la la lost you with eric🥺 and ughh i really love your writing like crazyyyyy
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♥ title: la la lost you in april [also part of @sunlightwoo ‘s 12 Months I Loved You collaboration project]
♥ member: tbz eric
♥ genre: f2l, ex! eric x fem! reader, model! eric [SFW!]
♥ warnings: swearing, some mentions of sex [like, once i think]
♥ wc: 3.4k
♥ a/n: sis when i first heard the song I absolutely loved how you used 'angsty wangsty' so I hope this one does it for you the way you imagined it <3 [fyi i wrote it in like, a camcorder recording audio format which is something i’m trying out so please hmu on whether it’s difficult to read/understand!]
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[REC: APRIL 2, 2019 - 6:39PM] SOLO LOG #1
Are you seeing this? This is the most beautiful sunset I’ve seen. I gotta get a shot of this-
Hey! Hey! I could help you take a picture with the sunset if you want to!
Oh! Would- Would you? That’d be great!
Of course! 
...
Here. Is it alright?
Yeah, yeah, it’s cool! Thank you so much!
Are you recording something? Is it a- Are you vlogging? Are you a vlogger?
Yeah, no... I’m actually on a solo trip for a bit.
Oh, where are you from?
Just the next state. 
Ah! You’re taking a break off... life then? I assume? Sorry if that came out weird.
No! No no! It’s alright! Yeah, I just needed a short break from... y’know, school and everything. My semester ended pretty early on so I took the chance to come out here and... see some new sights, meet some new people.
I get that. Well, for a start, what’s your name?
Oh, I’m y/n. Nice to meet you! And you?
I’m Eric. 
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[REC: APRIL 4, 2019 - 10:34PM] SOLO LOG #2
It is the 4th of April, 2019. I know, I know, I’m meant to do a daily vlog for all the 50 days I’m here but... it’s been... wow. Um... so I met Eric, the first day I touched down. The beach is just, about a 10 minute walk down and the sunsets are absolutely gorgeous. But uh... call me a fool and say that I’m living in the clouds but- what are the chances?
He’s funny, he’s such a great person to be around with y’know? Never a moment of like, awkwardness or stress and my God, look at me talking about a boy like that, though I met him 2 days ago. 
...
Um, he’s a freelance model. For those freelance shoots by UNIQLO or Target or something and he complains about the pay sometimes, but he looks good infront of a camera, so he’s... actually the one who won at life, really.
I’m not seeing him soon because he’s got a shoot out of town and he’ll be back next week. But I did get his number and he’s been texting me since. 
...
Wouldn’t it be funny if we end up together and then I have this whackass of a reel to show him? Jesus... I need to stop getting ahead of myself here. Freakin’ living in the clouds, aren’t I?
...
Anyway, I’m gonna go and see if I can get my weird projector shit up and working. See you.
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[REC: APRIL 7, 2019 - 5:14AM] SOLO LOG #3
It is... 5am... uh, April 7th- and I was just binging FRIENDS through the night, waiting for the sunrise before I get some shut eye and then... Eric just asked me out. Oh my God! Um, he’s coming back this Thursday and I’ll go see him at the airport before we go get dinner.
It was really funny ‘cause he had to wake up early for a shoot today and so his day has just begun but mine’s coming to an end and I just- I’m rambling so much, it’s kinda- it’s kinda sad, isn’t it?
I think I’m too happy to sleep right now so I’m just gonna text him some more before the sun rises- oh! He replied!
...
Anyway, I’m gonna go and finish up this last episode before sleeping. Hopeful I can sleep. Bye!
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[REC: APRIL 11, 2019 - 4:28PM] SOLO LOG #4
I am on my way out right now to go meet Eric at the airport, and I’m... it’d be an understatement to say that I’m excited. I know I’ve only known him for like, 2 days before he left but... I miss him. Is that possible? Missing someone despite knowing them for 2 days?
Anyway, I gotta go. Don’t wanna be late to see him.
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[REC: APRIL 13, 2019 - 10:23AM] SOLO LOG #5
Oh! Is that what you had-
Yeah! It’s the same camera!
What are you vlogging for, actually? Like-
Nothing, really. It’s just for my own usage-
Wait, you didn’t like set that up last night while we-
Oh, God, no! Who do you think I am?
I don’t know, I mean, we’ve known each other for... is it two weeks-
Just under two weeks-
Jeez-
I know, I know, oh my God.
...
I don’t regret it though. Yeah, like- I don’t really go down to the beach that often in the first place and it just- it just so happened that you were there that day and I saw you struggling with this old thing-
I was not struggling!
Yeah you were!
I wasn’t-
I’m kidding! Gosh, you’re so cute.
...
Are you gonna have the camera recording while this carries on?
I forgot it was on-
One day we’re gonna accidentally make a sex tape-
Eric!
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[REC: APRIL 17, 2019 - 1:15AM] SOLO LOG #6
-ould you pass me the hot water?
Mm? What?
The kettle over on the counter. Careful, it’s hot. Yeah, thanks.
Do you need help with-
It’s just instant noodles, sweet. Doubt I need a diploma for this. You’re recording again?
Yeah, does it bother you?
No, no, ‘course not. Though that means I can’t really do whatever I want to now.
What does that mea-
...
I can... still taste that bit of milk tea you had just now-
Could you tell it’s zero sugar?
I don’t think that matters, it’s still sweet and not great for your health to have that so much.
Aw, and yet you’re the one who suggested noodles at this timing, yeah?
You were hungry too!
...
Here, it’s done. Help me get the bowls? 
Did you even wash these?
Yeah, I did. If you don’t trust me, you can run them under the water for a bit.
Mhm. Here.
If it’s not enough, we can call for Macs.
Y’know, I’ve never had Macs past midnight back at home.
What? Really? Well, when you get back in May, would you try?
Yeah, why not? Maybe I’ll do that when I’m back in school. 
...
What date is it today?
April... hold on, um, 17. Careful, that’s hot.
...
When are you leaving again?
May 22. 
Are you planning on coming back anytime soon after?
I don’t know. I have school to worry about and the only other time I can come back’s probably during winter break in November.
...
I won’t be around in November.
Mm? Why not?
I’m moving.
To where?
I’m not sure yet, but I need to move depending on whether I get it and where the shoot’s at.
Shoot? It’s a big project, huh?
Yeah, it’s- it’s a pretty big deal.
...
I’ll- Let me just go and...
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[REC: APRIL 20, 2019 - 7:49PM] SOLO LOG #7
-idn’t have to!
No, c’mon! It’s such a great time to get this on camera! Come on, tell us what just happened!
Well, I just scored a huge model contract with Calvin Klein - in Manhattan.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I’m so fucking proud of you, oh my God! Can you believe it-
No, fuck off, I can’t either! 
Oh! Calvin Klein!
...
I swear, you’re an angel sent to me-
Fuck off!
I’m serious! it’s so timely- I just can’t- I’m just so happy to have met you.
...
Well, you heard it first here, ladies and gentlemen. Eric Sohn is a new model for Calvin Klein - Manhattan.
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[REC: APRIL 21, 2019 - 12:40PM] SOLO LOG #8
It is 12.40pm... April 21st, 2019. I’m finally back in my apartment after crashing at Eric’s for the last... 10 days? I think it was 10 days. My clothes were running out and I didn’t want to hike up his water bills so I just came back and- y’know did my own laundry.
...
Well, it’s- it’s been an absolute dream. The last thing I expected to... have, or meet? Here, is Eric. Um, but I know I’m probably going to regret this. Especially when May 22 comes. Uh... this is... it’s real bad. I mean, we’re great, y’know? But... it’s bad, because I know it’ll hurt. Like a bitch. When my time here is up, and I gotta go back to my reality, and Eric’s gotta stick to his. 
We haven’t really talked about it. May. I don’t think he wants to, and I don’t think I want to either. 50 days is too short. Either that, or I shouldn’t have come here in the first place. I shouldn’t have gone to the beach that day, in that hour. 
...
I just wish we had more time. I wish 24 hours were... maybe about 100 seconds more per minute. Does that make sense? 160 seconds per minute. Then again, I don’t think that’d solve my problem. I’ll still be on a ticking... time bomb. 
...
I know I shouldn’t say this. I know I can’t. I know I can’t afford to. But... I... I love him. I love Eric. With every... bit of me. It’s so... disgustingly cliché, but I feel so... comfortable with him. There’s really nothing we’d fight about, and even if we disagreed on something, we’d play it off like a debate, then forget about it the next day.
...
I love him. I do. And I’m going to regret this later. Without a doubt.
...
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[REC: APRIL 27, 2019 - 2:02AM] SOLO LOG #9
-ou can see the stars?
I don’t know, that’s why I’m trying, sweet.
...
Can you see them?
Yeah, maybe if I just turn this ISO- Oh! I can kinda see the North Star-
Oh! Yeah, you can! It’s really feint though.
Right.
It’s okay, we can just lay it down here-
On the grass? Will your camera be fine?
Yeah, yeah, or else you can just put in on top of my bag- here.
...
Here, can you see me? Am I in frame?
Yeah, you’re in frame.
Okay, great. Now get over here!
...
I can taste the smoothie you had just now.
Too sweet?
A little.
...
Oh my God! Put me down! Oh- not there! It’s ticklish- AHHHHH!
...
y/n, I have something to tell you.
Mm? What is it?
...
Hello? Earth to Eric?
I... I love you. So much... and I can’t bear to see you go in May. 
Oh, Eric...
No, I- I don’t want you to stay- or even think about it, ‘cause, you have your priorities and I have mine y’know...
Mhm.
I just... I just wished we had more time. 
I do too. I really do.
...
Eric?
Hm?
I love you too.
...
...
...
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[REC: MAY 1, 2019 - 4:23AM] SOLO LOG #10
1st May. 4...30? Am? I believe. Um, Eric’s sound asleep in his bed and I couldn’t sleep so I decided to do a log. 
...
I have... 3 weeks left. 4 weeks have gone past just like that, and I don’t know what to think about it. I came for a 50-day retreat. No stress, just myself and peace and quiet and tranquility and yet-
...
I- I don’t know if I can do this.
...
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[REC: MAY 7, 2019 - 3:58PM] SOLO LOG #11
So, Eric’s in shoot right now and I’m on the way into the studio with some donuts and coffee to surprise him. I called his manager and asked if it was okay so- I’m pretty psyched to see his workspace. 
...
Hi, I’m y/n, I’m here to visit Eric?
Ah, okay! Hold on, let me just get you signed in with the pass-
Count me in!
You sure? This Saturday at the prep-party?
Yeah- Oh! 
Eric!
y/n! What are you doing here?
I wanted to surprise you. Am I... interrupting anything?
Oh, not at all!
You must be y/n! Eric’s told me so much about you!
Did he? And you are...?
I’m Chelsea! I’ve been attached to the same Calvin Klein contract he recently got, so you could say we’re colleagues!
Well, nice to meet you! Oh, right, these donuts and coffee are meant for you guys actually!
Oh! You’re too kind! Eric, you’re such a lucky man.
I know, she’s just... everything.
Anyway, thank you so much for these. I’ll bring them back down to the studio for the crew to share. But Eric’s pretty much done for the day actually, so you guys can leave if you want to!
Are you sure? Don’t you need help downstairs with the equipment?
No, no! It’s fine, there’re more than enough people downstairs. Go have your date, and maybe you can bring her along with you for the prep-party this weekend!
What’s the prep-party... preparing for?
Oh, you’re so adorable! It’s a prep-party for the end-of-May shoot we’re gonna have. it’s a collab with DAZED so it’s a pretty big project.
You never told me you were involved in a collab with DAZED.
I was gonna tell you today.
He has been pretty busy recently, maybe slipped his mind. Anyway, thank you so much for the donuts and I’ll hope to see you at the pier this Saturday, mm?
Yeah, sure. Thanks Chels.
No problem! It was so nice to meet you, y/n, I’ll see you Saturday!
Okay, bye!
Bye, Chelsea! It was nice to meet you!
Bye!
...
Sweet, why didn’t you tell me you were coming?
I wanted it to be a surprise. I thought you said you’d end pretty late?
The filming was cut short because the shots were better than expected so we ended early.
Oh, I wanted to film you while you were at work.
You have that on?
Yeah- why?
No, just wondering. 
Are you uncomfortable?
No, no, it’s just... I really didn’t expect you to come to the studio. 
...
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[REC: MAY 11, 2019 - 11:12PM] SOLO LOG #12
It’s 11:12pm, 11th May, 2019. 11 days to departure.
...
I... saw... Chelsea and Eric... um, out by the garage- 
...
Well, I guess... it looked like they were just... having a really good talk. Or something. 
...
I left. I couldn’t watch it. So, I left without telling Eric. I did tell his boss that I wasn’t feeling well and I had to leave first. 
...
I guess this is the part where I regret it, isn’t it? Um... I don’t know... how... I’m gonna explain this to him when I see him again. Which is supposed to be- um- the rest of the night. I was supposed to go back to his place with him and I’ll stay for the weekend before I come back to pack my things, so-
...
y/n, are you home?
...
shit.
y/n, I know you’re home. I heard you talking. Open the door, I need to talk to you.
...
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[REC: MAY 12, 2019 - 2:00AM] SOLO LOG #13
...
I look like shit, don’t I? God, my eyes hurt like a bitch. 
...
I don’t think I need to say what just happened for you to guess what just happened, right? This... says it all. 
...
Fuck. 
...
I shouldn’t have come here. How did- How did my retreat turn out- turn out like this? 
...
This is- This is too much. Too much in too short... of a time. 
...
I don’t think... I don’t think I can do it. Not anymore. 
...
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[REC: MAY 19, 2019 - 9:59AM] SOLO LOG #14
It’s May 19th, 2019, almost 10am. I just came back from a morning walk by the beach just to... reminisce a little before I leave on Wednesday. 
...
I... haven’t seen Eric since the prep-party. I blocked him and I told him not to come over, though I think he has, like, a few times. I thought I heard someone come up to my door, but he never knocked. 
...
So, this is how it ends, huh? A 50-day romance cut short like that. Into about, 40? 
...
It’s crazy to think that I had... the experience of a whole relationship in 40 days. I definitely did not sign up for that when I booked this 50-day retreat. 
...
It was fun while it lasted, though. It was. I don’t think I’d find anybody else like Eric, and I guess it just sucks that it had to end like that. Things happen, right? That aren’t... in our control. 
...
...
...
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[REC: MAY 21, 2019 - 8:07PM] SOLO LOG #15
May 21st. About 8pm. I leave in about 15 hours. 
...
All my stuff’s packed. Definitely more things to bring home than I brought here. Half of these things were bought by Eric and given to me. I’m... actually not sure if I should bring them back. 
...
I don’t- I just don’t think I’d have the heart to throw them away.
...
Nor look at them when I’m home. 
...
Should I even bring this camera home? Maybe I should wipe your memory before I bring you home, hmm?
...
It feels like a dream, doesn’t it? Everything that’s happened. It feels like a fever dream. Maybe when I’m finally home, I’d wake up and it’d be the day I come here.
...
Maybe.
...
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[REC: MAY 22, 2019 - 10:03AM] SOLO LOG #16
-ny more luggage?
Nope.
Alright then, I think you’re all set. You still have about an hour’s time before the gates are open so you can get a cup of coffee or something, yeah?
Okay, thank you!
Have a nice flight ma’am.
Thanks.
...
Good evening ma’am, can I check your boarding pass?
Yeah, sure.
...
Okay, you’re good to go. Have a safe flight.
Thank you!
...
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[REC: MAY 22, 2019 - 11:34AM] SOLO LOG #17
It is about 11.30am and I’m on the flight, and here’s the view outside. Sky’s pretty clear and this thing says that the weather’s great so, it should be a smooth flight without turbulence.
...
This is it. This is really it. 
...
...
...
Um-
Hi, ma’am, I’m gonna need you to keep your camcorder.
Oh! Yeah, sure, sure, sorry!
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[REC: APRIL 2, 2020 - 12:48AM] ERIC LOG #1
Wow, this is... weird. How did you do this last year?
...
Um, hi. y/n. If you’re watching this then I’ve somehow managed to get this synced into your camera by some weird... bluetooth, iCloud shit that Felix helped me figure out. 
...
It’s been a year. And... I just thought you should... see this, or hear me out, at least. I know we didn’t end on the best terms... and I’m sorry. It was my fault. I shouldn’t have yelled at you for being unreasonable for something that was... suspicious. I should’ve understood. 
...
I should’ve been there. To see you off. And I’m sorry I didn’t. I... was scared, that I wouldn’t be able to let you go if I went to send you off. I was a coward. I still am. 
...
But I do want you to know that... those 50 days were the best days of my life. Albeit it ended horribly, but nothing could... nothing- nothing will ever replace what happened last April. 
...
I said I love you and... I still do. Every day I think about you and your smile and your voice and- and I cry to sleep... worrying that I’d forget how you sound like, or how you laugh and how... how you smell like. My bed smelt like you even after you left. 
...
I just- I love you. And I miss you. And I’d do anything to go back to what we had. I’d do anything to get- to get you back. 
...
I’m sorry.
...
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the clip comes to an automatic stop. the white triangle slapped onto the screen, begging you to play it again. you look up from the screen, watching the famous calvin klein ad that hasn’t stopped playing in the last month. 
he hasn’t changed one bit. not his hair, not his smile, not his voice. 
it’s a bittersweet pot of memory stashed in the back of your head when the memories flood back. looking back down at the camera, you count back the days - it was synced just last night. 
the pile of tissues by your thighs are carelessly huddled into the bin next to your feet, mentally berating yourself for going through the memory instead of formatting it. 
you stand, fingers shutting the screen back onto its body with a soft click. the tv blacks out when you press the red button on its remote. 
you’re halfway into your kitchen when there’s a knock at your door, and you immediately gasp, blinking rapidly.
“oh, it’s my fucking projector!”
rushing to the door, you don’t hesitate to get the door open. 
and yet, like the heavens were providing you with all the light to stop you from doubting yourself, your lungs empty themselves like vacuums. 
your heart stops.
your breathing stops.
“eric... what are you doing here?”
224 notes · View notes
o-pandora-o · 4 years ago
Text
Baker MC: April Fool's Special
Baker MC strikes again! Fooling the Demon Brothers in April Fool's by their realistic cake. How would they react?
Note: I would like to apologize beforehand, some of the brothers turned out to be boring rather than funny. I will try to edit this when I have the time.
Lucifer:
[No image was available for this]
Background: You planned this with the Anti-Lucifer squad. You hid all his pen in his room leaving a suspicious "pen" that looks like the pen he usually use. Satan put a powerful spell on the pen, removing its sweet scent to avoid the suspicion. You put a hidden camera to see his reaction.
Luci daddy came home tired from all the things he'd done in RAD.
He still have some paper works to finish, he put the paper works in the table and sat on his chair.
Ya'll saw him eyeing the "pen"
He picked up the pen and was gonna start writing until he glared at the camera and crushed the pen.
It was a chocolate and strawberry cake
He licked the strawberry (the filling of the pen) that splattered near his mouth, made a grin, glared at the camera and said "Run."
You all ran for your lives, spreading inside the House of Lamentation
Did you succeed in running : Nope
Did you three hang from the ceiling: Yes
Ya'll saw him smirk and laugh like a madman afterwards
Bonus:
Lucifer took a picture of you three hanging from the ceiling and sent it in the group with Diavolo.
Ofc ya'll didn't knew, you were hanging from the ceiling
Levi made it a meme and posted it on Devilgram AND gave Lucifer and Diavolo a printed copy
April Fool's to you
Mammon:
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Credits to: The BakeKing
It was your turn in making dinner and Mammon kept bugging you if he can help.
"No Mammon" you kept on saying but he was still bugging you.
You weren't really mad at Mammon (honestly you thought it's funny), but to make things interesting...
"I SAID NO MAMMON" you shouted at him.
"LOOK WHERE YER CUTTING HU--AAAAHHHH!!!" You cut your hand and blood was running.
"AAAAAH! LOOK WHAT YOU DID MAMMON" you screamed.
"MCCCCCCCC YOUR HAND" yes I can see Mammon He screamed loud enough that it can be heard at Diavolo's castle.
Glad you two are alone in the House of Lamentation though
You were wearing a long sleeved jacket and the "cake" was your hand; it was like a lava cake, instead of chocolate it was darkened and smoothened strawberry puree.
You glared at him and blamed him
Poor boi was crying, kept apologizing, and saying the lines of "I'm sorry", "I'm so dead", and "Let's take ya to the hospital".
He shitted on his pants and kept panicking poor boi
It was hilarious tho
He was crying and you couldn't hide the laughter
"Oi! Did someone hit ya in the head? WHY ARE YA LAUGHING YER HAND WAS CU-" and he he saw that the interior of the so called "hand" was made out of strawberry and strawberry puree.
"April Fool's Mammon!" you told him as you finally reveal your real hand.
"MC! Why did ya prank me?! It wasn't a good prank! I thought you-" You shushed him while you gave him a small bag of grimm.
"Is it for me? Are ya sure ya ain't pranking me this time?"
"Yeah, now buy what you want to buy, I will just go to my room for a while" you replied.
Cue you teleporting
It was a bag full of gold-coated chocolate that looks (and is heavy) like a bag of grimm.
"MCCCCCCC!!!!!"
The next few days you see Mammon pouting and murmuring things about you.
You felt bad so you left grimm on the floor of his room every time you were near it
Leviathan:
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Credits to: The BakeKing
On April 1st, Levi was required to go to the school for academic purposes, so you took this chance to play a lil prank on him.
When Levi was away, you hid all the items that he usually use: computer, consoles, Azuki-tan pillow, and some Ruri-chan figures.
And you took time to make realistic cake that are very similar to those you hid.
When he was almost home, you placed all the realistic cake on his room.
You were supposed to go on a raid with him when he comes home
Cue him coming home and going to his room
You visited the him in his room, panic reflecting off his face.
"Levi, is there something wrong?" you asked
"Ah, it's this computer, it doesn't open! And it seems I'm kind of making a dent on it too. It's so weirdddddd" he said
He got a bit forceful and his finger created a hole on the computer
"Eh? Cake? Mc did you do this? Lmao"
You hand him a note that says "Look for the cakes, the location of the real ones lie at the last treasured cake"
"Oh boy mc a scavenger hunt, its like the new anime I was watching 'My fiancée is a criminal mastermind that kept giving me clues to find the missing items and bodies to make myself famous' " I'm really sorry I really suck at names
So he proceeds with finding all the cakes, and he got all the real things for his room however...
" MC where is my limited edition Ruri-chan that is dressed like a succubus?"
"It's there, it was with the other Ruri-chan figures" you said as you were looking at the figures that he was holding
Turns out Mammon saw all the goods on your room, and took the chance to get one since he knows it wasn't yours.
April fool's? I guess.
Satan:
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Credits to: SideSurf Cake Studio
You were helping him in his cooking duty today.
You requested that both of you make human food because apparently you "missed the taste" of the cuisine.
So you took care of the usual ingredients of the cuisine: vegetables, onion, garlic, meat and etc.
He didn't know or did he that you secretly placed realistic cake counterparts of it.
When it was cooking time, he selected the cake counterparts (this boi might be smart but you were from the human world so he thought it was correct).
He started cutting an onion, to his dismay he saw a soft chocolate interior.
"Huh? That can't be right, I believe onions should either have violet, yellowish, or whitish hue inside"
"Hmmm yeah, let me try this one" you said as you grabbed another onion and proceed to cut it
"Hm, this one is the right one, I wonder what happened to that" you said
STOP THE CAP MC
"Hm, anyways I will proceed in cutting the rest"
Bottom-line all he cut was cake and what you cut the real one
"Satan, maybe you were cursed? All the ingredients that you touched turned into cake" you said as you were preparing to take the meal to the dining area.
"I suppose that is the case, however... "
"Hm?" you said as you were supposed to bring the meal outside.
"However I have outsmarted you MC, I knew it was you who made those realistic mini cakes" he said as he took a bite of the onion cake while grinning smugly
Smart boi #2
"I-uhhh No it was not- Hey wait a min! If you knew why did you continue to make me believe you were fooled!" you replied
"April Fool's MC~, if I didn't do that I wouldn't have  extra time to spend with you" he said as he got out patting your head
Satan, you slick son of a bish
Asmodeus:
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Credits to: Etsy
This guy is late for school
Did you plan to make him late? Yes No
Cue flashback: you ruined his beauty sleep 3 times which resulted in kicking you out of his room and made him wake up late
Well even though he is late, he would still do his morning routine without rush
Priorities ✨
You put a small camera on top of his cabinet to see his reaction
After hours of bathing he sat down to his dresser
He grabbed his toner and when he squeezed it lightly it nothing came out
"Ehhh? That's weird, I could've sworn this is the new toner I bought" he squeezed it more and the toner was destroyed revealing a squished vanilla cake
He sighed and said "MC did it again"
He tried looking and poking all of his makeup just to make sure it's not mini cakes
10/10 are all mini cakes
He saw a note that said "In the drawer lies the real make up hehe April Fool's day!"
When he came to RAD, he was already late for 4 hours
"MC when I said I wanted Makeup mini cakes, I wanted it for my birthday! Not today!"
Is disappointed at you
Will frown and pout when he pass by at you during school
Well you feel bad at pranking him so you treat him at an exclusive spa
Beelzebub:
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Credits to: The Custom Cake Shop
I mean Bell eats everything, so is there even use?
Beel had the whole day working out
Since he didn't have much money (not that you persuaded him to bring less, no-) his only option is to go home and eat
During the time he was working out, you made different flavored cakes and pastries into dishes. You made a ton of (chocolate-strawberry cake into) cheeseburger, (cheesecake) devildom sushi, cake turned into slushy (the container can be eaten too), plates can also be eaten, etc.
Well you made Beel drool, he didn't waste time so he sat down and took a bite of the cheeseburger
He was slightly shocked because it was sweet rather than savory
But that didn't stop his hunger
It was about 10 mins till he finished what you have created in 12 hours (and more)
"MC all you made was really delicious, now I want something salty to eat...Let's eat dinner!" he said as he dragged you to eat
April fools to you
After that whenever you gave him something to eat/drink (like a glass of slushy or something) he would try to also eat the container
Poor kitchenware and Luci's budget
Belphie:
[No image was available for this]
This boi knows
Smartboi #3
You gave him a pillow that is the same as the pillow he usually carries
He didn't really say anything about it, but he knows for a fact that it is cake
He slept on it
Your hard work in making it realistic,, he slept on it
You came back to his room and you wait for him to wake up
"Mcccccc, this is so fluffy like my favorite pillowww, but it's not really a good way to prank someone, but on the other hand it's really convenient...."he said as he yawns and signals you to come to his bed
He took a bite of the errrr pillow and said" This is really good, like the last time you made a toilet paper, but you know what else is good?"
My love for you jk
" Hm?" you replied
" This!" he said as he began tickling your sides
You fight him back and tickle his sides when you had the chance
It ended of as you two were panting and laughing in bed
Poor cake pillow forgotten
186 notes · View notes
drwcn · 4 years ago
Text
maybe after today’s acls training i can finally write that chengqing ER oneshot. 
— “Patient male, mid-twenties, motor vehicle collision, eta 3 mins” 
— “What no vitals? No GCS? ETA 3 mins? Who’s on the paramedic team?!” 
— “No one….Dr. Lu hit someone with her car on her way out of the hospital.” 
【A Midnight Conversation in Your Local ER】- Complete
[1] 
The night hunt had gone to shits.
That much was undeniable.
Jiang Cheng heard the panicked shout of his disciples just as he saw the array that he had stepped on.
Fuck.
The ghost of an once mediocre demonic cultivator wanna-be was going to bring Jiang Cheng, Jiang Wanyin - the Sandu Shengshou - to meet his maker. The irony of the situation would be laughable, if he wasn’t so irrevocably screwed.
That was his last thought before his entire body was engulfed by a blinding light and the world he knew disappeared.
The ground beneath his feet gave away, weightlessness paralyzing his body though he did not fall. He felt…launched, his body warping and squeezing and stretching, the air sucked from his lungs into the endless black vacuum.
But just like that it was over. Jiang Cheng barely had time to make peace with his death before his feet touch solid earth again.
Or at least….he thought it was earth, this black, tarry hard thing striped with yellow and white. He stared at it dumbly, breathless and disoriented, barely able to react when a loud blare assaulted his senses and his world went blindly bright yet again.
This time there was pain.
Jiang Cheng clutched Sandu, ready to fight, but then his head hit the ground and everything went dark. When he woke up again, an indeterminate amount of time later, he was in a small tube and had a distinct feeling he was not wearing pants, socks or shoes.
How the fuck do you ‘scan’ a cat???  
[2]
Method actor. The nurse, from the other side of the curtain, mouthed silently.
“Sir, can you tell me your name.”
“Jiang Cheng, Jiang Wangyin.”
The resident paused, awkwardly contemplating how to continue. “Uh…..which is it? Jiang Cheng or Jiang Wanyin?”
“Jiang Cheng, zi Wanyin.”
“Traditional parents?” The resident tried to crack a joke, but it fell flat. The strange man stared up at him with a blank look in his eyes and a frown that was rapidly deteriorating into a scowl. The resident cleared his throat and cast his eyes back onto his clipboard. “Uh, ahem, just the name on your ID please.”
“My what?" 
"Your personal ID….like a driver’s license?”
“Cultivators of the gentry fly on swords or ride horses. We do not rely on carriage valets.”
“Eh… right. Uhm, can you tell me how old you are and what year it is.”
“I’m 39, and the year is jiachen.”
Lu Qi frowned from where she stood by the door, arms crossed, watching her resident and medical student work. 39? He looks like a college student. But he also thinks he can fly, so I guess age is the least of our worries. 
“Jiachen.…?”
The M3 fished his phone out from his scrub pocket pocket and typed it in. “Sounds like the ganji system, like an old timey way to record year used in the past.” He whispers clandestinely to the resident.
“….Right. And uh, do you where you are?”
The man scowled at him. “Am I supposed to?” 
The resident scribbled something on the chart, and then looked up with a plastered awkward smile. “Well, thank you Mr. Jiang for your patience. Wang Fei here is the medical student on our team. He’s going to stay and ask you a couple more questions if you don’t mind. Afterwards we’ll confer with our attending and the team will be back to see you shortly.”
As he turned away, the R3 grimaced and shared a look with Lu Qi, who was the youngest attending physician in their ER, but was not technically working at the moment and so was not on the case. And technically, as the perpetrator who hit Jiang Cheng with her car, she had a severe conflict of interest.
At least this Jiang Cheng dude didn’t seem keen on pressing personal charges against her for MVA or suing the hospital in general… but that being said…
Yeah, they’re going to need a psych consult. 
Unless he’s on acid. 
Well… okay, psych consult either way. 
[3]
"It’s okay, you can relax.” Jiang Cheng said, waving dismissively at the woman standing by his bedside. “I’m not going to take you to the magistrate for hitting me with your carriage - car. You didn’t mean to, and I just came out of nowhere.” 
“....Thank you.” 
“You’re not Wen Qing. I know that now. Your name is Lu Qi. You can call off those psychia - psych - psychics - head healers - or whatever, I’m not crazy. It’s not my fault, you just… look so much like someone I used to know."
"Wen Qing.” Lu Qi echoed. 
“Yeah. Wen Qing. She was a healer - a doctor - like you, but different.” 
“I see. What happened to her?"
"She died. Almost twenty years ago."
"I'm sorry... that's awful.” Lu Qi’s response rolled off her tongue so well, because she had said those word a thousand times during her residency. So much so that it no longer had much meaning to her. Tonight however, she meant what she said. “Were you two close?"
"No, well…yes, maybe. No we weren’t exactly friends if that’s what you’re asking. She...operated on me. Without my consent or knowledge. Took my brother’s golden core and put it in me and then lied with my brother to my face about it. So no we weren’t “close”, but Wen Qing saved my life - well the purpose of it anyway. Saved me from a life of ordinariness.” 
Lu Qi did allow herself to dwell too much on what the fuck a “golden core” was, because her gut response was almost instantaneous. “That’s shitty of her.”
She clamped down on her tongue. 
God, why did I have to say that? To his face?! He was obviously in love with this Wen Qing person and they were encroaching on some dangerous emotional territories, but Lu Qi swallowed down her caution and plowed on nevertheless. There were things she felt she had to say, and since she’d already hit him with her car, how much worse could this shit get? “What I mean is she shouldn’t have. Not without telling you. Besides...there’s nothing wrong with ordinary.” 
Jiang Cheng chuckled bitterly. “Maybe you’re right. Still...she didn’t deserve to die. What her clan did was not her fault.” 
Now that threw Lu Qi off. Did this guy...kill her? 
Lu Qi half wondered if she stumbled upon a Yakuza-esque member whose psyche finally snapped after years of murder and violence. And yet, he seemed perfectly coherent, no flight of ideas, no tangential thought, no hallucations. Even his delusions seemed...logical. 
I must be the one losing, damnit.  
Jiang Cheng scratched a little at his chest, as if palpating for the “golden core” that he spoke of. "She saved my life, but when she needed help, I couldn't save her. But, if I were to go back… I can't say I'll choose differently. My clan needed me, my clan who was almost cleansed by hers. No, no I wouldn’t choose differently. I don’t regret my choices, but I am sorry. Sorry to her, sorry to my brother. I'll always be sorry that she died, and that I failed her when she needed me." 
Jiang Cheng had no idea why he was telling this stranger any of this, but maybe after twenty years, he was finally ready to address this guilt that he lived with. I mean who else was he supposed to tell? Jin Ling? It was nice, to have that face as an audience, receiving his words of confession. 
"She would forgive you." 
Lu Qi had no idea why she was offering absolution as if she had authority in this matter, but when she said it, the conviction she felt was so real, it was almost as though some external force was acting through her.
Which was ridiculous of course, but... 
"How do you know? You're not her." Jiang Cheng shook his head. “I wouldn’t forgive me.” 
"No, but you said she was a physician. So she should know, more than most, that sometimes there is no choosing who gets to live or die."
Jiang Cheng fell quiet at that, and his gaze grew distant. Lu Qi thought perhaps he was no longer seeing her as she was in front of him - white coat, scrubs, stethoscope -  but someone entirely different. The tension he held in his shoulders slowly eased, and he sighed. In the silence that stretched between them, Lu Qi hoped that this strange man with his strange past could find a sliver of peace. 
[4]
— Did you love her? 
— I thought so, foolishly, but maybe I didn’t. Even if I did, it was not well enough. 
— Do you love her still? 
— No... I don’t know. It’s been too long...but sometimes, late at night when Lotus Pier is quiet, I think I do. 
...
— Are you ashamed of it? 
...
— No. No I’m not. 
[5]
The patient known as Jiang Cheng left AMA, that is, against medical advice. It was the term they used sometimes for people who just up and leave without informing the team. 
Lu Qi had gone out to check on his labs, which came back with bonker numbers (I mean really, a hemoglobin of 455, sodium of 200, and a HCO3 of like...3?), but Jiang Cheng was gone from Bay 6 when she returned. The nurse made the overhead page, a code yellow was called, but four hours later, Lu Qi was ready to admit that she was never going to see this Jiang Cheng ever again. 
Somehow, she was okay with that. She had said what needed to be said.  
Her chief had given her a call on her cell and told her to go home and sleep. The guy didn’t look like he was gonna press charges, let’s count our blessings and move on. But the night had just been too damn strange that Lu Qi was all wired up from it and couldn’t possibly fall asleep. She had handover at 10 anyway. There was a change of clothes and toiletries in her bag. She could always take a shower in the anesthesia staff’s on call room and sleep until then. 
Dr. Sun was the anesthesia staff on-call tonight and was currently stuck in trauma OR. They were buddies since medschool; she’d understand.
Sighing, Lu Qi took a seat on the bench across from the bougie cafe in the lobby of the hospital. At this hour, it was the only one still open in the entire facility. The drinks they sold cost an arm and a leg, but Lu Qi needed the pick-me-up after the night she had. 
As she nursed the last bit of her matcha latte, two bickering voices pulled her attention to the front entrance. 
“Aiyo, A-Liang I already said I’m fine! I don’t need to be here!” 
“Fuck out of here with that bullshit, Chen Zhaoxi. You fell off the fucking roof! If Wu Kun hadn’t called me, you’d have gone on -”
It was him! Lu Qi shot up. It was Jiang Cheng! 
But no...no it wasn’t him. The well-dressed man dragging the second man (dressed in red pajamas) into the hospital was not Jiang Cheng. He had the same face - chiselled, handsome, scowling - but it wasn’t him. For one, his hair was trimmed short and neat, unlike Jiang Cheng who looked like he walked straight out of a BL xianxia tv drama. Secondly, his face was softer, eyes younger, and he couldn’t have been older than Lu Qi herself in her early thirties. 
“I was just trying to get to the litter of kittens trapped -”
“Yes, yes, and it was very heroic and I’m sure it would’ve made Wu Kun very horny, and you morons probably would’ve fucked once he got home had you not made a valiant attempt at breaking your neck -” 
“Excuse me,” the security guard manning the information desk chastised sharply. “It’s 4am. This is a hospital! Lower your voices, sirs.” 
“Sorry.” The men apologized sheepishly. 
Then, A-Liang, Jiang Cheng’s doubleganger asked, “Could you please direct us to the ER? This is my brother, he fell off a roof.” 
Lu Bin had no idea what possessed her to interject. “I can take you there.” 
All eyes fell on her. She walked towards them, heart pounding. 
This can’t be happening, this kind of thing just can’t happen... 
A-Liang’s face broke into a grateful smile. “Thank you, Miss -” Then his gaze trailed to her badge, and he corrected himself, “Dr. Lu. I’m Shen Liang. This is my brother Chen Zhaoxi. I think he fractured...well multiple things, please help him.” 
“Of course, come with me. Let’s get him a wheelchair. If he fractured is leg, he probably shouldn’t be walking.” 
“I didn’t fracture -” 
“You, you shut up.” Shen Liang rolled his eyes. “Don’t listen to him. He can lose three out of four limbs and say ‘ t’s but a flesh wound’.” 
Lu Qi couldn’t help but chuckle as she put an arm under the complaining Chen Zhaoxi and helped him towards the wheelchair. 
Shen Liang’s smile widened. 
[Extra]
“Holy shit, took you long enough!” 
When Jin Ling and Lan Sizhui finally dragged Jiang Cheng to their portal site, Jiang Cheng realized that the transportation talisman had created a channel through realities between what looked like two metal garbage dumpsters in a back alley behind a food establishment marked by giant yellow bunny ears.
Standing guard there, Lan Jingyi and Ouyang Zizhen were each munching on a strange layered bread and holding tall drinks contained in...what was it called again? Right. Styrofoam. 
“What is that?” Jin Ling wrinkled is nose at it. Brat. 
“It’s a Big Mac.” Replied Lan Jingyi as if Jin Ling was stupid. “And this is a milk shake.” 
Jin Ling scowled. “I said the bag of gold I gave you was for emergencies.” 
“Yeah but we were hungry.” Ouyang Zizhen defended. He neglected to tell them that the cashier had refused to accept the gold and instead asked for “cash” or “card”, neither of which they had, so Zizhen used a liiiiil confounding talisman he learned from Wei Wuxian. They did leave more than enough gold though...and that ought to cover the restaurant’s cost for their “burger”lary . Reaching into the brown paper bag he held under one arm, Zizhen pulled out a little box that opened to show pieces of... something. “These are chicken nuggets. They’re delicious! Try one! They’re really good with this sauce....hold on...” 
Lan Sizhui sighed. “We don’t have time for this. The portal will close soon. Let’s get Jiang-zongzhu home and we can sample these exotic food later.” 
The boys agreed. 
Jiang Cheng shook his head and huffed. 
288 notes · View notes
yong-bokk · 4 years ago
Text
all in²
pairing: special agent ! lee felix x medical examiner ! reader
genre: f for fluff and felix
warnings: mentions of dead bodies and a ghost.. or a murderer... or a ghost murderer
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welcome back to skz criminal investigation division !!
today
i’d like to introduce you to special agent lee felix yongbok ( ⁎ᵕᴗᵕ⁎ )
he’s one of the two agents with the prettiest long blond hair in the division in the whole wide world
also has the prettiest !! freckles !! that looks like stardust sprinkled all over his cheeks
to conclude: felix looks like a tiny ball of sunshine,
especially when he smiles ,,
BUT he can kick ass real hard ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ
very good with weapons and combat in general
he also has the deepest voice which comes in handy during interrogations
“stand up and show your skills you know the drill”
+12983742 points for intimidation >:
don’t u worry though
bc he’s nothing but a cuddle bug and the sweetest ball of fluff to his loved ones ‧⁺✧(⁙´ワ`⁙)⁺
and that will include u
ESPECIALLY u
but first ! u’ll have to meet him
so u, my precious reader, are the new medical examiner in the office yay!!!
it has only been a week since u started ur new job and u’re still trying to adjust
but thankfully u have seungmin, the senior medical examiner and also ur new partner, who has been so so helpful and friendly
u’ve been so busy during ur first week with work and all the transfer administrations that u haven’t got the chance to formally meet everyone
so far u’ve only met, well, seungmin
and the unit chief, bang chan, who is very friendly too
but one day !!
an unfamiliar face showed up at the medical examiner’s office |ω・)
GUESS WHO
i’m going to give u a clue
long blond hair, prettiest freckles, and a BLINDING smile
YES
FELIX (♡ > ◡ < )
he came to ur office to fetch a report from seungmin
and that’s when he saw u for the first time
u were bagging up a few articles of clothing to send to forensics
felix never thought anyone could make a lab coat look so pretty
but THERE U WERE LOOKING LIKE AN ANGEL
u: exist
felix’s lovestruck braincells: (⸝⸝⸝ᵒ̴̶̷ 。 ᵒ̴̶̷⸝⸝⸝)(⸝⸝⸝ᵒ̴̶̷ 。 ᵒ̴̶̷⸝⸝⸝)(⸝⸝⸝ᵒ̴̶̷ 。 ᵒ̴̶̷⸝⸝⸝)
cue: felix embarrassing himself in front of u
“hi, i’m here to r-report”
?????????
u are ??????(・ ・ ? confused
bc the most beautiful person u’ve ever seen just popped out of nowhere and says he’s here to report?
what does he even have to reportksljflkasdf
“hi! uhm i’m sorry, report what?”
“the medical report….?”
????????????????what????????
“OHH u mean u’re here for the medical report? hold on”
……
out of his entire lifetime
his brain choses to be dysfunctional right there in front of u
felix, deep down inside: i want to. (」。≧□≦)」 D I S SIPATE. (」。≧□≦)」
“oh right y-yeah, for the burn victim”
u hand him a copy of the report u had prepared and walked him through some of the findings
“we found something in the victim’s ear but i think we haven’t heard back from the lab-“
“hey yn they ran out of the cookies u wanted- oh! (。・o・。)ノ hey felix!”
“h-hi seungmin”
seungmin looks at him weirdly bc ??? what was that
who is this and what have they done with felix, his giggly cuddlebug of a friend
ANYWAYS
after u finished going through everything, felix said thank u and bolted out of ur office so quick
chan: “u okay there, buddy? u look.. uh”
“……that’s exactly how i feel too”
since then on
he never stops thinking about u
also keeps reminding himself of how embarrassing he was and gets sad over it again • ʖ̯ • )
not that he knows but !! u keep thinking of him too
u’re a little sad that all u know about him is that his name is felix (he didn’t even tell u himself :c ) and that he’s one of the special agents in chan’s division
but u two don’t see each other again after that for awhile
the next time u saw him was when u got back to ur office after lunch break
felix was fetching another report from seungmin
and he was all smiley and giggly (❁´▽`❁)*✲゚* with seungmin but the moment u walked into the room
he just smiles awkwardly at u and rushes out
u figured that he’s uncomfortable whenever u’re around
:(
and it was like that for a very long time
he’d come in with chan sometimes for the reports
and he’d be like buddy-buddy with seungmin but whenever u’re there he’s just hhshdfhshfgotta go
u wanted to be his friend too because he looks so lovely to be around :(
little did u know that he’s just shy because he likes u like A LOT and his brain just short circuits whenever u’re within his eyesight :(
u got felix going dumb da da dumb (sorry)
but stop being sad bc
here comes !! the twist to the plot !! (。✧ᴗ✧。)
one day
u were working late and we’re talking like LATE late because
(1) seungmin was out of office for a hearing, and
(2) suddenly 4 new bodies came into the office in a span of 2 hours?!@?!?!@# and u were currently in the brink of breaking down ;—;
but seungmin didn’t raise no quitter
with the power of coffee and anime by ur side, u started working through the bodies one by one
it’s a little past midnight now and u were quite sure the last light outside ur office turned off a couple hours ago and
u see
u could just leave and have seungmin work at it in the morning
but the caffeine in ur bloodstream said u wouldn’t be able to sleep once u get home anyway so
(๑•̀ㅂ•́)و back to work (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و
u were scraping something from the last victim’s nails when suddenly ??? the lights went off
ok let’s be real
u are ⁿᵒᵗ afraid
u work with dead bodies every. day. but it’s god knows what o’clock in the morning AND NOW it’s pitch black and u just hhhhSHDFHS
ur hand went into ur pocket to fish out ur phone but then u remembered that u left it to charge on ur table AT THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ROOM
reader u dummy
u didn’t know how long u froze in that same spot bc ???u’re kinda afraid and u couldn’t see anything
but suddenly u heard the sound of glass shattering and someone’s groan and u thought
this is it this is ur END
seungmin is going to walk into this office tomorrow and find 5 bodies instead of 4
u crouched as a horrible attempt to hide from the ghost……….. or potential murderer…………. honestly u don’t know which one’s better (maybe bc the answer is NOT BOTH??!)
u were internally cursing about how u could’ve had a scalpel in hand for self protection but instead all u had with u was a goddamn TOOTHPICK when u felt something? or someone?touch ur shoulder
“hey-“
“p leasedon’t kill me i’m new here i really don’t know anything pleaseiwon’t sayanything to anyone”
“YN IT’S ME”
“THEY EVEN KNOW MY NAME ALREADYSDKFJSK I REALLY DON’T WANT TO D-“ Σ(゚Д゚;≡;゚д゚)
“i’m not here to kill usdfskdfjs it’s me!! felix”
,,,,,,,,
felix? (・Θ・)
well
that was
,,,,,,,,embarrassing
“w-what are u doing here?”
“the electricity got cut off and i heard hyunjin say u’re working late and probably still down here so… (´ . .̫ . `) i came here to check on u”
u could barely make out his face in the dark but he was close enough u could see him smiling at u
the two of u just stayed there crouching on the ground and u were just about to say something when suddenly the lights flickered on again
( 〃..) ohsldkfjs he’s so close and if he keeps smiling that lovely u swear u’ll combust
“are u gonna go home yet?”
“i-i’m not done yet”
“oh ! i’ll wait for u”
“WHAT no it’s late go home”
!!!!
“exactly! it’s late!! i’m not letting u go home at 3 in the morning by urself”
so u quickly finish and when u’re done u found felix nearly dozing off on ur table </3
how can a person be so CUTE ◕︿◕
he walked u home and offered u his jacket along the way
(wouldn’t take no for an answer)
it was a little awkward bc the two of u are just very very Shy
but u enjoyed his company
when u finally arrived at ur apartment,
the two of u just stood there for a little while, u fiddling with ur bag and him with his earring
“i-“ “hey-“
“sorry, u go first”
“i apologize for scaring u earlier…. whenever we meet i just always embarrass myself”
he mumbled the second half of his sentence and ur sleep-deprived brain couldn’t make out what he said but !! he looked so disappointed (っ◞‸◟c)
so u gave him a tiny hug
“no, thank you for checking up on me earlier and for walking me home”
:o
felix was bright red
shy shy felix shy
“no worries..” ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄ ⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ “i guess.. i uh- i’ll get going, yeah? see u tomorrow?”
“see u tomorrow, be safe”
felix waited until u went inside and then let out a giggle
u hugged him
this is the BEST day of his life
it doesn't even matter if his house is on the other side of the city
he’d walk u home every day if it means u would hug him again
bonus:
“thanks for walking me home again” (⌒⌣⌒ )
lix looked like he was about to ask u something
but all he could say is his usual “no worries”
u see
felix has been meaning to ask u for ur number for a WEEK now but he just couldn’t seem to get the words out of his head >:
he was just about to chicken out once again when u fished out ur phone and gave it to him
“u know… i’d say text me when u get home but i don’t have ur number”
smooth reader very smooth (^⌒^*)
he thanked the heavens he didn’t drop ur phone when typing in his number because boy was he SHAKING
the two of u stayed up all night texting and neither could stop smiling that day
92 notes · View notes
crescentsteel · 4 years ago
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Keeping a Secret - Part 3
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pairing: Tsukishima x f!manager of Sendai Frogs genre: sexual tension/crack/fluff/slow burn warnings: lots of swear words, tsukki being a a closet softie wc: 7.3k (Ill just stop apologizing for this long chapter updates at this point)
[a/n]
Let me know if you want to be part of the taglist uwu
AO3
Part 2 || Part 4 || masterlist
“Remind me again why are we here.” Tsukishima tells you as soon as he steps foot inside your room. 
He scans the room and immediately notices the mess that it is, particularly the top bunk of the bed which he doesn’t doubt must be your share of it.
On the wall on the left side of the room are posters of seascapes and sea animals of different varieties while the desk bolted under it are framed photos of Sendai Frogs. He recognizes them all;, one was taken from the first win of the team on the first year you joined as the manager. The second is a photo of the team at the gym with the new members that year, including Kyoutani who had just recently joined. The last one is a selfie of you on the bus doing a peace sign and winking at  the camera while everyone was sleeping.
He kinda feels bad for your roommate now. You’re practically hogging the whole room.
You put down your bag on the floor and shoot him a confused look. “To do our project?” 
When you told him to meet in your dorm, he agreed because he thought you meant the common area. After all, he had no reason to think you’d invite him to your room. You two may have disregarded the club incident, tucking it away as a sordid memory from a night of insanity, but that doesn’t mean it is forgotten. However, that doesn’t seem to be the case with you as you appear to genuinely find nothing wrong with the current situation. 
You seat yourself at your table, taking out your laptop and notes from the trip last time.
“Go sit, Tsukishima,” you say without even looking at him as you spread out your notes on the table’s surface as your laptop boots up. 
“We could’ve just done this in the library, or at least in the lobby,” he says as a matter-of-factly.
“True, but I also don’t see any problem with doing it here,” you answer passively, still occupied with arranging your papers. 
He was right. It really does not bother you at all. So, he shouldn’t be bothered with it either. This way, at least, no one would see you and him together. You’re a person he doesn’t want to be associated with hanging around with anyways. 
“Do you always invite your groupmates to your room?” He asks out of curiosity since it didn’t seem like anything for you to just invite him in, as if you didn’t care much about your privacy. 
“Hmm. Depends,” you answer. 
He takes out his own laptop, but still eyes you as he prods further. “On what?”
The curve of your lips tugs up slightly as you sit up straight and lift your gaze away from the notes you took out and finally turn your attention to him.
“I welcome those who won’t get handsy with me.”
“Even if you’re the one who’d get handsy with them?” he boldly counters.
You cock your head to the side with hints of amusement playing across your features, which vexes him. The question was supposed to tear your composure, not entertain you. 
“Alright, let’s get the fucking elephant out of the room since it bothers you so much,” you announce with levity. 
If you’re going to be honest, the kiss still finds its way to your mind sometimes. You just keep pushing it off so that you won’t get stressed out by it. What you find interesting is that he still keeps shoving that fact that you kissed him as if you wanted to do so.
Well, you literally did kiss him, but it’s not like you sought for it prior to the incident. 
It just … happened.
“I’ll come clean, good sir, if you’ll allow me,” you declare sarcastically before setting a more serious tone. “I admit it. It was one hell of a mistake to kiss you. But I didn’t mean to. As ridiculous as it sounds, I really didn’t. It was just one of those stupid, off-the-cuff things people do.” 
Your voice takes an accusatory note when you ask, “And why do you sound like I harassed you or something? Hmm? ‘Cause if I remember correctly.”
You cross your arms and look up, pretending to be deep in thought before facing him again with a fraudulent shock. “Oh right!” you exclaim exaggeratedly. “You kissed me back,” you add in almost a sing-song manner.
You put an elbow on the table and rest your cheek on your palm as you hold his glare with a snide grin. “How about that?” 
He continues shooting daggers at you but you don’t falter. Quite soon enough, he lets up and returns to the passive, apathetic face he usually wears, which signals your victory for the argument. “Like you said, it was one of those dumb on the spot whims.”
You nod agreeably. “Alright, great. Now that that has been established, let me reassure you. It’s never ever gonna happen again. Ever.”  
Your eyes are devoid of any humor while your words drip with firm resolve. Yet, he finds it off that you’re not asking him to do the same given that you both just agreed that you are equally accountable for that imprudent act. He is almost just as guilty. 
“Aren’t you going to ask the same from me?”
Your somber expression breaks into a humored one as a laugh rumbles from your throat. You shake your head in comical delight while you look at him. “No, I won’t. Actually...” you drift off as you scoot closer to him until you’re right beside him. “Give it your best shot.”
You close your eyes and tilt your chin up. Did you really just dare him to kiss you? Kiss those stupid lips and have a repeat of that appalling night? 
Should he?
He would do it just to erase the smug off your face, just to prove you wrong. But similar to that night, he can’t bring himself to do it. He hates the idea of instigating such a thing. 
Even more so now that he’s already had a taste of those lips. Those lips that felt too exquisite that it infuriated him. Those lips that took away his logical thinking. With you offering those lips to him so generously, you make him hate them even more. That pretty face and that playful smile of yours do nothing but add to his fury. 
“Can you get your face away from me?” 
You peek one eye open before bursting into laughter, making his displeasure towards you skyrocket. Why the fuck is he always your laughing stock?
“See? This is why I don’t mind you coming over, Tsukishima. I bet if I strip naked right now, you’d walk out in a heartbeat.”
His scowl deepens. The mental image of your unclad body is very much unwelcome and unappreciated. “Bring that up again and I really will leave,” he snaps. 
Even with your smile intact, your humored expression dissolves a bit and is replaced by a curious guise.
“You know, everyone likes me except you,” you say with no shred of diffidence.  
You really are full of yourself. You might be ‘likeable’ for a lot of people, but that doesn’t mean every single person you meet actually likes you. He’s certain there are people who you rub off the wrong way -- people like him. 
“Isn’t that a bit too conceited, even for you?”
You shrug your shoulders indifferently. “Maybe so. But you’re the only person who shoves your blatant dislike on my face.”
“You didn’t seem to have a problem with it for the past three years,” he replies as he flips his laptop open and boots it up so he can turn his attention somewhere other than you. 
“I didn’t need to work with you like this for the past three years.”
He doesn’t know where you’re going with the conversation so he doesn’t respond anymore. He’s certain you know why he finds you a pain in the neck. You constantly get on his grill with every opportunity you get. Maybe if you didn’t, he could actually tolerate your topsy turvy persona. But it’s as if it’s your personal mission to aggravate him.
“I’m putting the deal I offered during the trip,” you announce.
“What deal?” he asks as he starts typing bullet points of what should be done today so he can go home already.
“Forget I’m the annoying manager when it’s just us two. And I won’t deliberately piss you off.”
He types the last bullet point before returning his attention on you. “Then what? I suddenly become nice to you?”
“Hell no! I’m not asking for a fucking miracle. It’s not like you’re ever nice to anybody. Geez!” you explain derisively. “I just want us to have a conversation where you’re not giving me death glares.”
You give him a smile, one that lacks your usual haughtiness. Still, he can’t tell if you’re being serious or if you’ll actually manage to hold the deal you’re proposing. Truth be told, he wants it. He can’t handle you being your usual if you two have to meet beyond training hours and, even worse, in private. 
If this keeps up, he might end up cursing this subject by the end of the semester, which would be a waste because likes this subject way too much for you to taint it with your idiocy.
“Deliver your end of the bargain. Then you’ll have mine.”
Your eyes twinkle with glee at his semi-approval. “We have a deal then.” 
You go back to where you’re seated a while ago and proceed to start discussing at hand.
--
With the start of the game season, training has become more intense. Coach Mira had the team work on the weak points she identified with the help of  the data you tallied from last season’s games.
“Kyoutani! Do not lower those arms just yet. Keep those elbows up when you block,” Coach yells at him, as Kogane spiked from the other side of the court.
She looks over at the other players practicing their jump serves. She furrows her brows at something. Following her line of sight, you see that it falls on Tsukishima. 
On his next serve, the ball spins ferociously but is of low height that it hits the middle of the night. 
“Y/n,” Coach calls out. She didn’t have to say anything else as she cocks her head to Tsukishima’s direction with a telling expression on her face. She’s asking you to handle him, and you know exactly why. 
Before he can toss the ball for another jump serve, you yell out merrily which you know will definitely catch his ears, “ Tsukki!! ” and jog to where he is. His blank expression turns into a scowl when you reach him. 
“Can you stop calling me that?”
“You’re so mean. Aren’t we close enough for me to call you ‘ Tsukki ’?.” You ask with a dramatic pout and exaggerated false woes that he visibly cringes after hearing it. 
He doesn’t respond to your pretentious act. “Why are you here?”
You instantly lose the cheeky act and get to what Coach Mira wants to let him know. You’re just going to twist the words a bit to his ‘liking.’ 
This is the problem you noticed with Tsukishima, one worse than his rotten way of interacting with the team. He can be incredibly unmotivated at times, and when he is, he only gives the bare minimum amount of effort. 
It’s the one thing you can say you truly dislike about him because he’s a professional athlete for crying out loud. It doesn’t matter if he’s unmotivated, uninspired, or doesn’t feel like trying. He should be disciplined enough to push himself to put as much work as he usually does when training.
“You’re not going to get those serves in with that half-assed attitude of yours,” you say sternly while you eye him with a threatening stare. 
His face scrunches in utter displeasure. He’s well aware that he’s not feeling his best today and he’d rather do blocking drills for the whole raining than do ten consecutive jump serves. 
“Since enthusiasm is the answer to everything else, why don’t you try it?” He bites back, which you obviously weren’t expecting. He’s always irritated when you point out his mistakes, but thus far he has always stayed silent. 
Maybe the amount of time you’re spending together outside the gymnasium has made him reach the limit of his patience… which isn’t even a lot to begin with.
“Are you serious?” you ask incredulously.
Of course he wasn’t. You might have some sort of experience with volleyball (although he doesn’t know to which extent), but jump serves are difficult. The coordination of the toss and the run up to hit it at the right angle is aggravatingly hard to pull off, especially for him since jump serves need tons of practice.
He detests the practice for it; he needs to run, jump, and swing his arm over and over. It is boring and tiring for him because it is purely based on physical prowess, compared to practicing blocking where he’s actually thinking. 
He thought you’d leave him alone when you stepped away. Instead, you come back with a ball in your hand. You dribble it off the floor with unbendable focus as if you’re trying to recall something.
“Are you serious?” he’s the one who asks this time. He was just fucking around. He didn’t expect you’d actually respond to his provocation.
“Yep,” you answer with your full concentration on the ball in your hand as you spin it vertically. Some of the players notice what you’re up to and briefly stop what they’re doing to watch.
You close your eyes and take a deep breath. You bat them open with burning determination before you toss the ball. 
Instead of watching the ball, he watches your form. There’s no trace of awkwardness in your movements, almost like you’ve done this frequently before. The three-step approach is nearly perfect as you propel yourself up to jump. 
The sharp sound of the ball hitting your hand causes the rest of the gym to look at you. The ball spins ferociously at a height he’s not sure is sufficient to get over the other side of the court. He wishes it won’t. That would be the second worst thing you could ever do to him, the first one being that certain occurrence he’d rather not think about again. 
You falter on your feet when you descend from your leap but you immediately look up to see if your serve makes it. Everyone else, including him, is on the edge as they watch whether the ball will get in or not.
It roughly scrapes the edge of the net, effectively thwarting its velocity. Still, it bounces off and lands inside the opposing court, causing the rest of the team to cheer you on as the ball hits the floor.
You seem to forget for a short while that you did it to spite him as your face beams with inexplicable joy while his contorts with ire. 
Even if the momentum of the ball was broken, you still managed to get it over - the one thing he hadn’t been able to do from his last eight attempts. Meanwhile, you did it on your first. 
You definitely had a lot of experience in high school. No beginner can manage to do a jump serve like that, even if it was flawed.
‘Shit,’ he silently curses when you face him with a cocky grin disguised as a pleasant one. 
“Who knew that my experience being an outside hitter and captain of my high school team would still be useful as your manager?” you ask as you slowly walk towards him.
He doesn’ expect that your knowledge about the sport came from first-hand experience. He thought you’re manager of another team previously or just a crazy volleyball enthusiast.
You pick up another ball and softly push it against his rib as you look up to him with contempt. “Don’t tell me I can do better than you,” you spur him on with squinted eyes.
He snatches the ball away from your hands and steps back from the serving line. He spins the ball one time and tosses it high. Instead of a three-step approach, he makes it a four to increase his vertical jump. He tosses it high enough and channels all his rage for you at the ball. 
With how high he jumped, the ball easily goes over the net. Its trajectory curves when it crosses over and hits a spot a little bit just beyond the end line.
He clenches his fist at his another failed attempt despite exerting more than necessary effort for that shot. He avoids looking at you for he’d be put in an even worse mood if sees that taunting grin of yours. 
But of course you had to make yourself seen and intentionally go in front of him with an impressed look in your face instead of a condescending one. 
“That was great! Holy shit. It was just a smidge out. Wow.” You applaud him earnestly, and as much as he despises it, it makes him a little less bad about that missed shot. 
“Can you leave me alone now?” He drives you away to fend off the stupid feeling. He’d rather you just walk away and don’t say anything. “Not like that serve mattered,” he mutters in annoyance.
“What are you talking about? It was awesome!” you yell out with your eyes shining with flagrant admiration, which annoyingly strokes his ego. 
“Just a bit less and it would have been in a spot difficult to return,” you remark as you pat his shoulders approvingly before heeding his request to leave and go back to where Coach is. 
“Sorry, Coach. I distracted everyone else,” you scratch your head with an apologetic smile when you return. 
“I’d tell you off, but everyone seems more motivated now, so good work I guess,” she commends you with a satisfactory tone.
“He looks really pissed though,” Coach Mira adds as she glances at the blonde middle blocker.
“More than you know, Coach,” you reply with a wide smile as he serves another ball and gets it in this time. 
--
Prior to your meeting with Tsukishima today, you proposed to finish the project as soon as possible so you can both focus on other other uni subjects on top of training hours. He immediately agreed, which didn’t surprise you because even though it’s not game season, you’re pretty sure he can’t wait to stop having to see you.
The project’s deadline is in three months, but you believe you can finish it in less than two if you meet up at least twice a week to work on it.
It should be okay, given that you both agreed to have a truce of some sort from the usual dynamic of your relationship. You actually think that it’s not going to work out smoothly, but you still suggested it with the hopes of decreasing his animosity towards you. Yes, it’s fun and amusing most of the time, but outside the gym where you’re just a classmate and not his manager, it’s kinda draining to deal with it. 
“Won’t your roommate mind if there’s a stranger in your room?” he asks as he sits down and rummages through his bag. 
“Oh.” You thought he already figured it out because he didn’t ask about it on his first visit. “Didn’t I tell you before? I don’t have a roommate.” 
His eyes immediately go to your bunk bed that you didn’t bother getting replaced because it’s convenient when you’re too tired. You usually just mindlessly throw your stuff at the top bunk for a later clean-up.
“Wanted the whole room to myself,” you add.
“Spoiled, little rich brat, aren’t you?” He really doesn’t have much basis for his statement. He just wants to say something nasty and sneer at you because he wants to get back at how you called him out during training the other day.
When he meets your gaze, you raise an eyebrow at him, reminding him about your agreement while working on the project. He purses his lips to the side and returns to his passive expression without saying anything. You roll your eyes in response.
“Well if being a scholar while working as your manager is being a spoiled rich brat, then by all means. Do consider me one,” you answer before looking back on your screen. 
He would have never thought you were a university scholar. You don’t look like the type. You’re way too carefree and all over the place. He would’ve thought it was a joke, if not for the tiny offended glint he caught when he said you’re a spoiled brat.
That’s exactly the reaction he wants to get from you, yet it didn’t feel satisfactory. On the contrary, it’s making him feel like a prick. He is being one, but he doesn’t expect to feel like one, especially towards you who does nothing but get on his skin. 
Still, hell would freeze over before he apologizes. Instead, he prods on the topic.
“Why would you even work as a manager if you’re already a scholar?”
It doesn’t make sense to him. You don’t need the work if your university fees are already waived. It will just pile on to the academic requirements you will need to maintain. 
Your hand stops scrolling on your mouse as your eyes soften, still  remaining on your laptop. “Cause I love it,” you utter like it’s the simplest thing in the world.
The look in your eyes is instantly replaced by mockery when you lift them to meet his. 
“Someone’s being inquisitive today.”
He gets his headphones out and plugs it to his laptop. He really is curious why you chose you to be their manager, but you just had to be an obnoxious bitch and break the agreement you offered to him just the other day. 
He knows you’re too much of a chaos to actually pull it off, so instead of wasting his energy by being irritated by you for the day, he’d rather pretend you’re not there.
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” you say loudly with a wide smile, yet he can see the sincerity of the apology through the slight panic in your orbs. You must have realized he’s had enough of your shit. “My bad. Old habits hard.” You laugh nervously. 
You speak again when he puts down his headphones on the table. “I may have quit the sport, but I still love it. I love taking care of players like you guys who have the same passion for it.”
“Doesn’t seem like it’s worth it,” he comments with unheld honesty. You could have a lot of time off of your hands if you quit being their manager. You don’t even need the job.
You plant your hands on the floor and lean back as your gaze drifts to the photos of the team displayed on your desk.
“You might be right. A marine science student dedicating her time on sports even though she’s not an athlete? It does sound impractical. But,” you revert your eyes back to him as you continue on, “it makes me happy. That alone makes it worth it. Even if I don’t get paid, I’d still do it.”
Your face glows with pride and joy with your last statement, completely undeterred by his earlier cynicism. If anything, you look even more convinced that you’re doing the right thing. 
He can’t tell if he finds it admirable or disturbing. Probably the latter.
“There’s more to life than just sleep, study, and survive, don’t you think?” 
It was a rhetorical question that he would’ve still refuted if someone told him that years ago. Back in his freshman year in high school, he thought overzealous passion was stupid. Unless an individual is some sort of prodigy, it wouldn’t get them anywhere even if they keep trying to death.
Still, he put in a lot of work -- more than he should -- when he was playing in Karasuno. What was just a club became entirely something else for him, which, up until now, he still hasn’t put quite a finger on. 
When he graduated from Karasuno, he wasn’t sure what to do. He wanted to continue playing, but there was a nagging feeling behind his head that he shouldn’t. He thought that that part of his life was already over and while it was good while it lasted, it was time to move one. 
Yet, when he was handed out an application form for the university’s college team, he found himself grabbing the sheet of paper. 
He didn’t have any reason to pursue it beyond high school. He knows he’s good, but he’s not that good. He was at university already. It was time to focus on his future and ignore the itch to hold the ball with five other players on his side of the court.
What’s even more absurd was the next day, he submitted the application form and tried out for the team. He said to himself it wouldn’t hurt to go on playing until he has finally had enough. He’d just ride it out until he got tired of it. 
In his sophomore year, he was scouted by Sendai Frogs and that’s when he knew that the unreasonable passion he has for volleyball is not going to go away. Even now in his graduating semester, he’s still not ready to give it up.
He won’t admit it in your face, but, in a way, he can agree with what you just said. Life is more than just getting by and surviving. That’s the only reason he can think of to justify his choice to continue volleyball: so that he wouldn’t have this constant dissonance that pursuing the sport is a vacuous path he’s treading on. 
“Anyways, back to work now, yeah?”
You smile briefly at him and return to the research you’re tasked to do. He puts his headphones back in his bag and gets back to his own task as well.
He thought all is well and you won’t pester him until you both finish what you’re supposed to accomplish for the day. Unfortunately, he thought wrong. 
You suddenly close your laptop and start whining. 
“Tsukki.”
As usual, he does his best to not acknowledge your existence. 
“Tsukkiii, ” you whine louder. 
For the love of God, you sound the most annoying when you use his nickname. Even though you’ve used it several times now, he’s still not used to it. In fact, he does not believe he will ever get used to it. Shimizu and Yachi not even once called him that, and they were more respectable managers than you are. Sort of. It doesn’t matter that you’re more active and hands on when managing the team.
“Tsuuuk -”
“What?!” You successfully manage to get his eyes off the screen.
“I’m bored,” you pout. 
He glares at you unbelievably. What are you, a five-year-old? 
“And that is my problem, how?” he asks with disdain. 
“Aren’t you getting tired?” you ask back, unfazed by his blatant irritation. But then again, you never are. 
He is getting tired too, but he’d rather drag his brains and eyes out than rest and extend the time he’s going to spend with you. 
“Let’s take a break, please, ” you cry out with pleading eyes. 
“I don’t care what you do. Just leave me out of it.” He puts his attention back on his laptop and looks for the journal article he found significant among the other tabs he opened. 
“I’ll feel guilty if I see you still at it while I goof around,” you admit. 
He really couldn’t care any less. None of what you’re blabbering about is any of his concern. If you keep at it, he’ll just take out his headphones again to drown out your childish whining. 
“I know!” You suddenly perk up. “Let’s review for our quiz,” you suggest eagerly. “We have one tomorrow, right?”
He almost smirks at your suggestion, but he manages to suppress it. He’d rather not let you see that he’s pleasantly amused with your suggestion. 
He didn’t expect that that was your idea of taking a break. He thought you were going to propose something completely absurd like watch stupid videos online because that’s something he could totally see you doing on your free time. 
But yeah, he can definitely use a review. It would be a productive break from the strenuous researching and writing you two have been doing. 
Even though he still hasn’t verbally agreed, you continue on. “To make it interesting, there’s a penalty for every wrong answer.”
He sits up straight, pushing his glasses closer to his face as you successfully gain his full attention. “What penalty?”
Your smile widens when you realize that he’s finally acknowledging your idea of taking a break. 
“Okay, okay.” You rub your hands together in excitement before you clasp them together. “For every wrong answer you get, you need to say something nice about me. And of course vice versa.”
He scowls at the idea. “I prefer the opposite. Get the answer wrong and you get insulted. That sounds more of a punishment.”
You shake your head with your lips pressed into a thin line from disapproval. “Nope. If I get even one wrong answer. I’m sure you’ll get into a litany of rude shit you piled up against me over the years. And I’ll just sit here uncaringly receiving your fury. Does that excite you?”
Hell no. It will infuriate him even more if he throws something at you and you just take it apathetically. But he still doesn’t agree with your initial mechanics. It’s not fair to him.
“No, it doesn’t. But the consequence of a wrong answer is too easy for you.”
You place a palm on your chest and gape at him. “Me? Too easy for me ?” 
You break into a boisterous laugh while still maintaining eye contact with him. He just stares back at you stupefied with no idea what you found so hilarious.
“Tsukishima,” you say after recovering from your disparaging hoots of laughter. “I can think of literally one nice thing about you. Maybe two if I tried hard enough,” you explain with your face still crinkled with the laughter you’re trying hard to contain. 
If you’re trying to provok him to take on your challenge, you definitely succeeding. “Fine,” he hisses. 
Your laughter is completely thwarted when your eyes widen with delight as he succumbs to your plan. 
“Great! Okay, two more rules. One, objective questions only. Two, we can’t say anything that involves Volleyball. For example, you can’t tell me that I’m a great manager, because I’m very much aware of that already, okay?”
His frown only deepens from your conceitedness, only to realize that that’s the only aspect of you he’d consider complimenting you about. 
“But there is nothing else nice about you other than that,” he says without any trace of sarcasm or ridicule, only stating what he considers the truth. 
But you don’t take any offense in his statement. You’re expecting as much. That’s why you added two more rules to push the both of you to take the review seriously.
“Better not get anything wrong then,” you counter easily because it’s as simple as that. It’s a review just for a quiz after all. He shouldn’t be that worried.
“Thirty minutes to review. Then let’s start the quiz?”
You take that he’s fine with it since he closes his laptop and gets his set of notes from his bag.
You get your phone and set a thirty minute timer. You do just as he does and focus on your own notes, skimming over the last two chapters covered during lectures. You concentrate on your learning materials but the alarm sets off after what seemed like ten minutes to you.
You frantically check your phone to see if you put the wrong time, but you didn’t. Thirty minute have indeed passed. 
When you glance at Tsukishima, he’s already looking at you with crossed arms and a self-satisfied smirk. He must have finished before the timer went off. He wouldn’t have that smug expression if not. 
Even though you haven’t fully gone over the last parts of the lesson covered, you can’t help but be enlivened at how competitive he is. He must really hate losing. 
You notice it too with the way he plays volleyball. He might look calm on the surface, but you know he wants to crush his opponents. And right now, that opponent is you. 
His muted excitement affects you. Even though you’re not totally prepared, you’re confident with your own wits. 
“Ladies first, so go ahead, Tsukishima.”
He clicks his tongue, his usual habit when he’s irked with something, but this one was forced to make it appear as if he didn’t like what you said. But you can tell that he doesn’t give a shit about that and he actually can’t wait to ask away just to so you can get it wrong.
Unfortunately for him though, you two are just exchanging questions when your mini game starts. He answers your questions without hesitation and you do just the same since most of his questions are in your own list that’s supposed to be for him.
“What’s the movable membrane found on the eyes of amphibians?” It’s his sixth question that has you racking your brain for the correct answer. When you don’t respond immediately, he sniggers like he’s already won. 
But you do know the answer, or at least the first letter of it. It's the letter N. N-something membrane.
“Nictaling membrane,” you answer unsurely. 
The spread of his wicked smile immediately tells you you’re wrong. “It’s nictating,” he corrects you. 
“Oh come on! I’m just one letter off,” you strongly reason out.
“Yeah, and that would still be marked wrong in the actual quiz,” he refutes.
Damn it. He’s right. That one letter makes a whole lot of difference your professor will definitely not let go.
He places one elbow on the table and rests his chin at the back of his hand, keeping his eyes trained on you as he silently anticipates for you to pay the price of your penalty.
You bite your lip disquietly when you realize the rule you set was a double-edged sword for you can’t also think of anything nice to say about him. There’s that terrible attitude of his which is usually your source of fun, but not exactly something you can call nice. 
You have something in your mind, but your pride won’t let you voice it out. 
He starts tapping the table with his fingers. “You’re wasting both our time, y/n.”
You accept your defeat and tell him anyway. “Fine. I think you’re smarter than me,” you confess. 
You expect him to agree unanimously, but instead he looks at you stupefied, blinking a few times without saying anything. 
“But you’re a scholar,” he remarks. You’re not sure if he just disagreed with you or he’s just putting that fact out in the open. 
“Well, yeah. But I’m just really good at studying and have good time management. You’re actually smart. You’re critical with stuff,” you explain. 
You cheated a bit with your answer since most of your basis is from volleyball games. Although your trip last time is also proof of that. He provided really good input on how you should go about with the project. 
“Okay! Moving on,” you proceed before he can comment further on what you just said and milk it to his benefit.
You ask another question, which he also knows that correct answer to. Originally, you just wanted a fun but effective way of reviewing, but now you kind of want him to get at least one question wrong so you can get even. 
“What do you call the structure the lower vertebrae of anurans is fused into?” he asks another difficult question. 
You rub your palms on your face, your frustration clouding your mind from recalling what it could possibly be. You push your hair back and sigh when you realize that you’re not getting this one either. 
“I don’t know,” you surrender. 
His current expression is the most lively one you’ve ever seen from him outside volleyball games, but it isn't a pleasant one. He looks like a villain whose evil master plan is coming to fruition. 
Maybe you should’ve just agreed with his earlier suggestion to get insulted when you get it incorrectly. You would’ve just sit it out and brush it off afterwards, not make your brain hurt even more from thinking about non-existent good traits from the guy across your table. 
You look around as you desperately try to think of something remotely nice about him.
“Oh,” your eyes meet his right the moment you recall that instance, and form a genuine smile as you remember it once more. 
“It was real nice of you to let me lean on you on the way back to Miyagi last week.”
He removes his elbow from the table and fixes his posture, losing the lax and confident aura he had two questions ago. 
“You would have woken up face down on the bus floor if I didn’t,” he says defensively as if what he did needs that explanation for it to be acceptable. 
You honestly thought he’d rather let you fall flat on the floor. You’re about to ask him back then if he was sure, but you just accepted his angry, yet generous offer which you didn’t expect to come from him.
“I know. I just didn’t think you’d let me rest on your shoulder, so thanks,” you say earnestly, not a trace of your usual cheekiness present. 
“It felt nice and comfortable” you add reservedly. You’ve been wanting to thank him but you didn’t know how to bring it up without being awkward for you’re only used to dealing with grouchy Tsukishima.
It’s only then you realize that despite his palpable dislike towards you, he’s not a complete asshole and still cared enough for your welfare that time.
He remains expressionless with his eyes drifting down to his notes, avoiding your gaze as he does so. “The answer is coccyx, also called urostyle,” he ushers back to the question you got wrong, dismissing what you just divulged, which you’re thankful for because you feel like fidgeting with what just dawned on you.
“My turn again then!” you said too loudly as you try to shake off the feeling and put your focus back on the review.
You read the only item left in your list, still hoping that he gets it wrong since this is the last. 
“What part of the amphibian nervous system regulates heart and respiratory rates?”
Unlike previous questions, he doesn’t answer off the bat this time.
“You’re wasting both our time, Tsukishima,” you repeat what he said to you earlier even though it's only been seconds after you uttered your question. 
“Don’t get ahead of yourself. I know the answer,” he declares with reassured confidence. “It’s the cerebrum.”
You decide to hold his gaze for two second before you burst his bubble. “Fucking finally!” you rejoice in his defeat. 
“Close enough, Tsukishima. It’s the cerebellum,” you announce all too cheerfully.
He hurriedly gets his notes and cross checks if you’re actually telling the truth. You just watch him scramble with a very pleased smile on your face as he goes rigid. 
“Fuck,” he mutters to himself. He must have seen that you were telling the truth.
You start squirming in your seat. Oh man, you’re way too excited to hear what he has to say about you. You want to egg him on, to tell him to hurry up but that might affect what he’s going to say so you force yourself to shut up. 
He raises his gaze at you while you make sure you’re not smiling too wide to annoy him even though you’re reeling from anticipation. 
He still doesn’t say anything, but you know he’s thinking based on the way he’s studying your face. 
“You have a slightly above average face.”
You run that by again in your head, not understanding what he meant by it at first. 
Above average face? Did he just say you’re pretty if translated from a socially incapacitated person’s language? Is that why he was staring so hard at you?
Of all the things he could choose to say something about, he decides to compliment your appearance? You know that you're a bit good-looking, but you don’t think he notices it. He doesn’t seem to be the type to care about that stuff.
Even when you first met, he just looked at you with a vacant expression and greeted you blandly out of courtesy while the rest of the team ogled at you. His apathetic eyes eventually turned scornful over time because of how often you pick on him, and despite that, he does acknowledge that you are pretty.
You’re used to being showered with admiration because of your face so you’ve developed a natural response to it: a gleeful smile with a spritely ‘aww, thanks!’
But with Tsukishima, it doesn’t kick in. Instead, you avert your gaze away from the unwanted fluttering in your chest. You can’t even look him in the eye as you try to collect yourself and think how you’ll respond to that without looking flustered. 
What the heck is wrong with you? That could hardly be called a compliment. Now that you think about it, it actually sounded sort of like a product review with its lack of any fondness. 
With that in mind, you manage to regain some of your composure and offer him a faint. “Um, thanks.”  
Tsukishima looks at his two remaining questions he listed and even though he’s winning the game, he doesn’t feel victorious at all. Your confessions did nothing to make him feel good about himself. They were too sincere that they made him uneasy.
He also doesn’t like that he had to admit you’re pretty. He expected you’re gonna make a fuss about it. He actually would’ve preferred that than you being uncharacteristically embarrassed about it.
Something weird is definitely going on. You’re not acting like yourself and neither is he. There had been too many opportunities to badger you, but he just let them pass by. Same with you. You could have easily teased him about letting you know he finds you attractive.
“I’m out of questions,” he lies to end the damn review. 
“Me too, actually,” you say with an apprehensive laugh.
So it’s not just him. You also feel the change in the atmosphere between you two. Your smile is uncertain and you look like you don't know what to do to remedy the situation -- that is, if you even know what’s wrong with it because he sure as hell doesn’t. 
But even if he has no idea what’s going on, fortunately, he knows how to end it.
“I’m tired. I’m calling it a day,” he says as he starts packing up his stuff. 
You seem to agree since you don’t say anything and just watch him collect his things. You only react when he stands up. 
“Oh yeah. Sure!” You stand up as well.
“I can see my way out on my own,” he stops you when you start to head for the door.  
You freeze on the spot then nod timidly. “Okay.”
As soon as he steps out and closes the door, you plop yourself back to where you were sitting. You grasp the edges of your table as you softly bang your head against it, gasping a heavy breath of relief when the air becomes undoubtedly lighter after he is gone.
“What the fuck was that?” you mumble with your cheek against the wooden surface. 
Part 2 || Part 4 || masterlist
taglist (those crossed out can’t be tagged)
@ameliaxo @suikrem @akaashisslave @tsumurai  @babythotshq @loving-unicorns106 @flairlust @geektastic84 @anaiss97 @berna-dette @just4readingfics @suteorra @xxekitten69xx @simp4tsukkii @music-is-all-i-need @keshinslittlegirl @raspberrysunshinebby @iminlovewhaikyuu @pdiddy11 @lightyagamami @sailorscout1902 @lovershaikyuu  @expectonothinfromme @mitzuya @yamigoop​
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mister-supernova · 4 years ago
Text
Missed Connection
Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4
Pairing: Hope Mikaelson x Reader 
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It’s almost been a month since your encounter with the stranger you believed to be from your dreams. Without any luck of seeing her again, you were beginning to think that maybe that’s all she was; just some mere figment of your imagination that you so desperately wanted to have all the answers you needed. 
As insufferably difficult this summer was for you, you still managed to get through it. You thought it was because school wasn’t in session and that you’d be back in your element in no time once classes begin again. 
That was what you had hoped for anyways, but alas even when the halls were filled with your peers and your routine was back in place, nothing seemed to change. The mysterious void in your chest didn’t ease like you wished it would.
You couldn’t help but wonder if your friends had been feeling the same way, too. Surely there’s no chance that you could be alone in this situation, right? 
“You can’t tell me that things haven’t felt a little weird since Landon destroyed Malivore. He doesn’t even know how it happened, Lizzie.” 
The blonde Saltzman nearly whips you in the face with her hair as she abruptly turns to face you in the crowded hallway. “Y/n, we live in a world where witches, werewolves, and vampires exist. Everything in our lives is bound to have a tiny amount of weirdness.”
She made a good point and you knew that, but you also knew that this feeling was different. It had to be. 
Lizzie frowns at the disappointed look on your face and rests a comforting hand on your shoulder, “Look, the most important thing is that Malivore is gone. No more bizarre monsters coming to kill us every week. Now try to stop overthinking things and let’s get through this school year in peace.”  
Before you knew it, your conversation ended just as quickly as it started and Lizzie was on her way back to class. You hang your head with a defeated sigh, desperately searching the hallway for someone who may be just as lost as you were. Instead, you see everyone going about their first day back like normal. 
Students who were away with their families are now smiling brightly as they reunite with friends. Other groups of friends laugh at a joke another says as they pass you by and you wonder if there was someone you should be doing that with.
The clarity that you sought out today only made you more confused than ever. At this point you wished that it was still summer vacation because seeing your classmates having a great first day back had you thinking that you really were alone with your feelings.  
Maybe you just needed a day to hang out with your friends after class today. They may not share your thoughts on how odd things have felt recently, but being around them definitely helps clear your head. 
“I’m sorry, Y/n. You know Landon and I would be down to watch a movie or something, but we’re going on our official first date today.” Josie tells you, disheartened. 
After the multitude of movie dates the two of them shared throughout the summer, you’re surprised that none of those had been labeled as dates, but you weren’t going to tell her that outloud. The two of them seem to be really happy to be spending so much time together and you weren’t going to get in the middle and be the third wheel no one wants, especially on a first date. 
“No worries, Jo. I’ll ask Lizzie and MG if they’re free.” She gives you a gentle squeeze on your arm with a sympathetic smile before you go off to find her sister. 
Things didn’t seem to be going to plan here either.
“If I hadn’t already agreed to this stupid- I mean,” she grits her teeth with a forced smile, “very cool study date with MG I’d totally hang out with you. God knows I’d rather do anything else.” You knew you weren’t supposed to hear that last part, but Lizzie was always awful at lowering her voice. 
If you weren’t already feeling distraught, this definitely was the cherry on top of your depressing cake of sadness. 
Instead of showing Lizzie that, you plastered the fakest smile you could and responded with, “Don’t worry about it. I’ll just… hang out downtown and get myself a milkshake at the Grill or something.” 
Plan “get your friends to distract you from the abrasive thoughts penetrating your brain” had failed, but you weren’t going to let it stop you from at least getting out of the school for a couple of hours. With everyone so busy while classes are back in session, it made you wonder what in the world you did after school before this year. 
As much as you tried hyping up how fun it was going to be hanging out downtown by yourself, it only made you feel even more bummed out. Like everything else you’ve been doing since the night Malivore was destroyed, something felt off and nothing seemed to be your remedy.
Minutes turned to hours and you ended up drinking four full glasses of cookies and cream milkshakes at the Grill, literally falling into a sugar coma at your table outside. The sun was barely setting when you got here, but then it was fully dark out when you were woken up from your sugar rush nap. 
“Jesus, Y/n. I thought you were dead or something.” You lean your head upwards to see that it was Landon who woke you from your slumber. 
“One could not be so lucky, phoenix boy.” You groggily respond, stretching out your muscles and wiping any drool from your cheeks.
Looking at your surroundings, you notice that Josie isn’t around. 
“Aren’t you supposed to be on a date?” 
There’s a pained look on Landon’s face at your question, “Yeah, about that… she, uh, she said she wasn’t feeling too good and decided to go back to the school.” 
You raise an eyebrow at him, “What, did you take her to eat sushi or something?” 
That was meant to be a joke, but the look of realization on the curly-haired boy’s face told you all you needed to know. 
“You went to a sushi place.” 
Landon quickly slides into the seat across from yours, “It’s what I suggested. W-Was I not supposed to?”  
“Jo can’t digest any sort of raw food without wanting to convulse. I learned that the hard way when I first started going to the Salvatore school,” you shiver at the memory, “Never again.” 
The phoenix begins falling into a full state of panic, “Oh my God. I didn’t know that! Wh-What am I supposed to do? What if I completely ruined everything? What if she never wants to go on another date with me again? What if-” 
Your patience was thinning very quickly, “Landon, just relax. Take a breather for a second,” you inhale, watching him do the same, and breathe out at the same time, “Go back to the school, check up on her, have a convo about getting some better communication skills and I’m sure everything will be fine.” 
Landon nods, “Okay, okay yeah. That’s good. I’ll, uh, I’ll do that,” he continues to sit across from you until you look at him expectantly, “Do I do that now?”
“For your sake, Josie’s, and especially mine, yes. Now would be great, buddy.” 
“Right, okay. Thanks, Y/n!” He scrambles out of his seat and begins to shuffle away from the Grill. 
“Go get ‘em, Tiger!” You shout with as much enthusiasm you could muster before slumping back into your chair. 
Still dazed from the sugar rush nap and exhausted from that conversation, you lean forward with your elbows on the table and begin wiping the sleep from your eyes using the palms of your hands.
“This is gonna be one hell of a year.”  
“Long day, huh?” You recognize that it’s a girl’s voice you’re hearing, but not one that was familiar to you. 
Moving your hands away from blocking your view, you look up to see the person you convinced yourself was just a figment of your imagination. The long auburn colored hair, fair-skinned, blue eyed girl from your dreams was standing right before you. For a moment, you thought that maybe you really had lost it. 
“Sorry. I just, I saw you sitting here earlier and thought you might want company.”
You’re almost positive that you were staring at her with your mouth hanging open like an absolute idiot. Just say something, dumbass!
“Mind if I join you?” She asks, gesturing towards the now empty chair that Landon left behind. 
“Yes!” 
Idiot! 
“I mean no! No, I uh, I don’t mind.” You chuckle nervously, adjusting yourself in every way possible to hide the fact that you were internally freaking out.
The girl gives you a patient smile before taking the seat in front of you, “So, party of one tonight, huh? I mean, I saw you finish talking to someone right now, but it didn’t seem you two were here together.” 
“Yeah, no. Not together at all or with anyone really,” for some reason you had to make this very clear to her, “That was just a friend of mine who’s having some lady troubles, so I decided to be a good samaritan and give him some positive advice.”
“How chivalrous of you.” Right away you could tell that she was teasing and the nerves you had seconds ago simply began to vanish. 
“Why thank you,” you smile, feeling a wave of warmth when she returns one back, “But yeah, it’s just been me, myself, and I for the night… and day… and probably for the rest of the school year if I’m honest.”
Her smile fades and she tilts her head inquisitively, “What makes you say that?” 
Oh, where to begin. 
“I’ve been asking myself that for a while now actually. Everything should feel perfect given the fact that I have these amazing friends, I go to this incredible school, I’m 100% healthy and not dying of anything that I know of,” you shrug at yourself, “I should be happy with that, but I’m not. It feels so selfish of me to say and I wish I could fix it, but I can’t. How can everything be so close to perfect, but yet there’s still something wrong?” 
The girl stares at you with such empathy and sadness in her eyes that you could swear she was holding something back. 
You continue, “Things also haven’t felt normal lately. My definition of normal anyways. For some reason everything has felt completely off, like I’m missing something. You know when you forget that there’s somewhere you’re supposed to be? Like an event and you don’t realize you’ve forgotten about it until the day of and you say to yourself, ‘oh shit, I can’t believe I forgot about this really important thing’. That’s how I’ve felt ever since summer started,” you notice her tense up slightly, but you continue, “but I can’t remember what I’m forgetting.”
At this point, you were surprised this girl didn’t think you were crazy and start running for the hills. If this were any normal stranger, you wouldn’t feel comfortable enough to overshare the thoughts you’ve been keeping secret from your close friends. For some reason, she made you feel the complete opposite. Strangely enough--given the world you live in--you felt safe with her.
“Everyone at school is making me feel like I’m the only person who feels this way. Everyone else can go back to normal. Everyone else can move on and go on dates and study dates and hang out with their friends and go to class without feeling lost and overall just be… normal.” You finally let go of the breath you had been holding in for what feels like months.
Then you start to laugh at the ridiculousness that just spewed out of your mouth, “Jesus Christ. I’m so sorry. You probably thought you were going to have an innocent ‘nice weather we’re having’ type of conversation, but instead you got a stranger dumping their whole life crisis onto you.” 
“You really don’t have to apologize. Trust me, I understand how insanely messed up life can get and how relieving it is to just vent it all out,” she gives you a reassuring nod with a genuine look of understanding that you’ve been wanting to see for months, “Even if it’s to someone who can potentially be a serial killer.” 
The both of you burst out into a fit of laughs and you swear that you’ve never felt so connected to a person you just met. It was as if your souls had met in another life and were catching up for the first time in a while. Neither of you had a name to place with your faces, but that didn’t seem matter because you already felt like you’ve known this girl for years. 
“I’ve had quite a rough couple of months myself. Not sure if I’d binge drink four cookies and cream milkshakes to numb the pain though.” 
You shrug, “Well, it’s better than the latter option that I can’t even legally purchase because I’m underage. Plus, it helps that these are the best milkshakes in town--even if they are 4 dollars a glass.” 
Now you’re hoping that your old co-worker can cover your bill since you only brought ten dollars with you tonight. Before you could reach for your wallet just to be sure, another thought crossed your mind. 
“Wait. How did you know they were cookies and cream? I know it’s a lot of milk to force inside by body, but I normally leave no trace of evidence behind. Are you a witch or something?” That last part was obviously a joke otherwise she’d be at your school by now.
The girl opens her mouth to speak, but it takes her a moment to come up with an explanation, “It was my best friend’s favorite. Yeah, we used to go out for milkshakes all the time and I guess something about you reminds me of them.” 
You smile, flattered, “Well, might I say, your best friend has amazing taste,” she purses her lips into a tightened smile and lowers her gaze, almost as is the memories of this said ‘best friend’ pained her to think about, “I’m assuming things aren’t so great with them right now?”
She sighs at the thought, “We were close for a long time. I’m actually surprised that they stayed as long as they did. I probably gave them a million reasons to bail, but they were annoyingly persistent,” she chuckles, “I’ll admit, it took me a while to settle into our friendship, but the moment I did was something I would never regret. From that point on the only thing that could separate us was death.” 
Judging by her heavy use of past tense words, you could only think the worst happened, “Did they, you know, um…?” You didn’t want to ask the full question seeing that she was clearly still hurt by the absence of this person. 
She shakes her head, “No. No, it turned out death wasn’t the only factor that was able to keep us apart. We meant a lot to each other and later realized that there was more to us than just friendship. Eventually, things started becoming serious but me being the person I am, I pushed them away and left.”
“Have you tried reaching out to them again?” You thought that there was no way two people who felt those intense feelings could completely forget about each other.
“Once, but things changed. They took one look at me and acted as if I never existed.” Maybe it was the empath in you, but it broke your heart seeing a small pool of tears building up in her eyes. You wished that you could say something to make her feel better and tell her that everything will be okay, but how could you when you don’t know her?
She quickly wipes the tears before they could fall and takes in a deep breath that you instinctively mirrored to compose yourselves. 
“I guess it’s my turn to say sorry, huh? I feel like my baggage was a little heavier than yours there,” she sniffs, huffing out a light chuckle. 
“Well, if we’re giving out medals here, you’ve got the gold. That’s for sure,” you grin, hoping to lighten up the mood.
Her laugh--that you could tell was genuine--gave you the assurance you needed. 
“I feel like I should give you a hug. I mean, if you’re cool with that,” you suggest, ready to push yourself out of your seat, “Because I could kind of use one and I’m just assuming--” 
“That would be great, yeah,” the girl nods with a relieved smile. 
“Alright, great.”
The two of you stand, moving around the table to meet each other in the middle. Her head seemed to fit perfectly against your chest as her arms pressed behind your back. All of the weight that had been piling up on your shoulders began to fall at your feet and the tension from stress that built up inside your chest began fading away. How this could happen from an interaction with a complete stranger, you had absolutely no idea. 
“Is it weird if I say this doesn’t feel weird?” You ask with the side of your head leaned against hers. 
“Well, I think things are only weird when someone makes it weird.” 
You pause for a moment, “Do you think this feels weird?”
She laughs and you know for a fact that she could hear your heart skip a beat, “No. I don’t.”
You fight the goofy grin from appearing on your face, but fail miserably, “Okay, good.” 
Part of you was afraid of what’ll happen the moment you separate. You had no idea when would be the next time you see this girl or if there was going to be a next time. This was the first day in a while when you didn’t feel lost, instead you felt that this was exactly where you needed to be. You felt normal.
Before you could actually start making things weird, you begin to pull away from her embrace, “Well, tonight I learned that I can click with a stranger within a span of ten minutes give or take, so thank you for that.”
She smiles, “Thank you, too.”
“I think it’s safe to say that we’re at the point of learning each other’s names now.” 
“Yes, because why start with those when we could just tell our whole life stories and share an intimate hug first?”
“Exactly! Actually, you know what? I think we should get married in Vegas really quick and we’ll just figure out our names during the vows section of the wedding ceremony. Whatever we come up with in the moment will just be how we refer to each other for the rest of our lives,” you joke. 
“You’re absolutely right.” Wow, a girl who can keep up with your sarcasm without thinking you’re a complete--huge emphasis on complete--idiot? She is the girl of your dreams--literally and metaphorically. 
You stared down at her in wonder, hoping to God that you’re not dreaming and that this interaction has been real, “It’s, uh, it’s Y/n by the way. My name. Y/n L/n.” 
“Hope. Hope Marshall,” she reveals and a victorious smile appears on your lips when you finally have a name to match a face. 
Your smile quickly drops when the clock tower starts going off and you realize that it’s nearly midnight, “Well, it’s been a pleasure meeting you tonight, Hope. I'm sorry to cut the rest of the evening short, but my school just got a new headmaster and unfortunately he’s a lot more strict on our curfew than our previous one. Don’t want to turn into a pumpkin, you know?” 
She chuckles, “No worries at all. It was nice meeting you, too, Y/n,” Hope smiles and you can tell that she didn’t want to leave. If you were being honest, you really didn’t want to either. 
Neither of you could find the energy to be the first person to walk away. To do that would be like trying to separate two annoyingly strong and stubborn magnets apart.
As much as you wanted to spend the whole night learning more about each other, you also didn’t want to be put in detention on the first day back at school. 
Unwillingly, you take the first step backwards without wanting to fully turn away from your newfound acquaintance, “Thanks again for the chat. I hope to see you again very soon, Marshall.”  
Hope rolls her eyes, but can’t contain a smile, “Only if you’re lucky.”
“I think I like my chances,” you wink playfully before turning your heel to make your way back to the school feeling the most energized you’ve felt in a long time.
~
apologies for the later update than usual with this series and I apologize in advance if it takes a while for part 6 to be posted. I’m in a bit of a writing funk right now and my mind is currently locked onto the Wilds soooo there may or may not be imagines for that fandom coming from me soon. anyways, happy late 2021 and here’s to hoping this year isn’t complete shit! much love y’all
taglist: @chicken-wang09​ @trikruismybitch​ @sodangtired​
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kominum · 4 years ago
Text
semoto (corpse x fem!reader)
4 times you think tuxedo mask!corpse could be yours + 1 time you learn to stop feeding your own delusions 
pt. 1 + background info can be found here! please read for context. 
basic rundown of classic!sailor moon (anime) lore ‘creatively’ used in this two-part:
sailor moon and tuxedo mask are star-crossed lovers/soulmates that faced tragedy in a previous life. 
sailor mars (aka you/reader) had a crush on tuxedo mask’s non-hero persona, darien/mamoru, for a while 
sailor moon is the moon princess and tuxedo mask is the earth prince.  
sailor moon’s non-hero persona, usagi/serena, bickered a lot with darien/mamoru.
fem!reader // tw: death mentions, bodily injury, unrequited love to the very end, some unresolved tension. 
1. “Whaddup, baby?” 
Without much reason, you and Corpse trade off calling each other whenever a new monster is defeated. You’re figuring out all of this as much as he is, but he doesn’t have much guidance besides some supernatural force within him. He’s not taking instructions from a black cat and white cat like you and the other girls are who can help fill you in on the gaps -- all he knows is that he’s pivotal to maintaining Earth’s existence, and he’s not exactly thrilled about it.
But the calls are never about the fights, never about your secret identities. In fact, you’d be willing to bet half your grocery funds that he still hasn’t made the connection between you and your Sailor Mars persona and part of you wants to keep it that way. Sometimes you’re mentally exhausted and just want to forget about the events for the day or night, which is why you usually end up calling him soon after everyone disperses or vice versa. It’s almost instinctual these days, and you wonder how long it’ll be before you accidentally crack. 
Right now, the rule of thumb seems to be, “Never trust new flashy shops that open with no warning and have too-good-to-be-true grand opening offers.” This time, some luxurious salon opened up by a famous local hairdresser had been the said attraction. All of you weren’t ignorant enough to believe the sham, but the star of the show had taken the chance to say, “Let’s go scope it out!” when really, she wanted that free haircut. You had called her out on it, but she argued that if anything happened, then perfect, you all could take care of it right then and there. Needless to say, you do not want to be attacked by a monstrous version of Edward Scissorhands ever again. Corpse had made a dark, humorous entrance, a style he’s really adapted to because he knows it pisses Sailor Moon off, 
About an hour later, you’re home and bandaging up some cuts and rubbing salve on bruises, phone on speaker and dial tone blaring through the bathroom. You’re addressing the scrape on your knee when he picks up, a low drawl of, “Whaddup, baby?” comes through and your heart stutters.
The girls call you a number of terms of endearment: sweetie, honey, love, dear, babe, queen, but the last person to address you as ‘baby’ with any amount of affection was your ex-boyfriend.
You scoff to hide how flustered you actually are, quietly hissing as you attempt to put some Neosporin on the scrape and catch onto some stray skin. “Are you drunk?” You ask jokingly, knowing full well he wasn’t. 
“Drunk? Nah. Tired? Yeah. But that’s always.”
“Sorry to hear that.”
“It’s old news. But uh, what’s up? Been a while since we last talked.”
“We talked like...three days ago. You called me, remember?”
“Feels like forever. I like talking to you.” 
You wonder if it’s irony or plain, cruel fate that this man will probably be the death of you.
2. “Don’t lay a fucking hand on her.”
It’d been a bad day overall. Lack of sleep compiled on by a growing pile of assignments in addition to having to get your tires checked out for an air leak because your car said, “Not today, honey,” -- everything came together in torrential hurricane and the last thing you needed was to be caught fighting another force of evil.
You’re so tired.
Sailor Moon seems to have all the energy in the world as she dodges attacks left and right, but your muscles are screaming in agony. You’re constantly hunched over and panting, but looking for the right openings to weaken the monster. Luckily, the creature has its back towards you when it dashes over to Venus and you muster everything you have to summon a bow and arrow made of fire, pulling back and making sure your arms don’t quiver. 
But at the last second, your lack of oxygen gets the best of you and your flame sniper barely manages to graze the monster’s side and narrowly avoid Jupiter. It’s enough to cause a distraction, but the anger in its glare as it’s directed at you elicits surrender in your heart. There’s nothing left in your bones to help you run or hide, and your knees buckle painfully onto the concrete. Everything else hurts so bad that you’re not bothered by the sediments digging through your skin. Venus is running towards you but she’s not quick enough, and you feel your eyes begin to slip. If this is what death feels like, then so be it. You hope that the girls’ mourning will be short, that they can still complete the ultimate mission, and--
“Don’t lay a fucking hand on her,” an angered, frustrated baritone spits out and you’re torn between laughing or crying. In a separate romantic context, you’d like the idea of wholeheartedly leaving your life in his hands. But in this reality when either of you could die at any moment and the world be consumed in darkness, it’s something you would never wish upon anyone. It’s a different situation than your bonds with the girls. 
The pain is enough to send you in and out of consciousness for the next few minutes. But strong, warm arms sit you up, though they’re slightly trembling and keeping you awake. “Hey, you okay? What happened to you? You’re stronger than this.” 
“G-great way of telling me, fuckthathurts, that I was...shit today,” you joke, but hiss when you try to move your legs and the deep scrapes scream in agony. 
“Take it easy, ‘kay? Or your princess is gonna have my head--”
“Thanks man, but we got it from here,” said princess interjects, hoisting you up with the help of the other girls. “You can go.”
“Speak of the devil,” Corpse chuckles and helps make the transfer less painful, a lot less awkward jostling around. “Look, I saved her--”
“And I said thank you. We’ll see you around,” your stubborn friend dismisses. 
“You’re welcome, baby.”
“Not your baby, piss off!”
3. “I’m always gonna be there for you, no matter what.”
It’s soft yet sonorous, deep yet light. Twilight hours are cast high above you both, separated by walls and buildings connected over wires and unseen forces. Technology is the sharpest, double-edged sword you’ve seen and used on this planet, because Corpse has never felt so close yet so far than in this moment. Your mind deludes you further by indulging in believing he’s right there next to you, strong arms holding you much like he did when you were on the brink of unconsciousness just two weeks ago.
Wishing, hoping, wanting. Dangerous, dangerous, dangerous.
The one year anniversary of your ex-lover’s death looms over you on another sleepless, caffeine-fueled night. It’s no surprise when his custom ringtone chimes softly throughout your room during these graveyard hours, but it certainly raises your eyebrows when after a minute or two, he asks tentatively, “Are you gonna go visit him?”
There’s no question as to who or where “him” is. You haven’t been since the funeral, if you’re honest, swept up by work, classes, and your new side job. But Corpse doesn’t know that, and you know it’d be the right thing to do. Maybe it’d help settle the storm of anxiety (or guilt?) that swirls in your gut on a daily basis. 
“I think so,” you reply quietly after a moment of silent contemplation, already thinking ahead to what the drive might be like. “He deserves better.”
“Do you want me to come with you?”
Charming, compassionate, thoughtful, absolutely too good for this world -- the three-letter affirmation nearly slips off your tongue without a second thought. You can’t risk him seeing you, putting two and two together, and potentially forever losing him to his long-lost princess. Selfish delusion creeps through your veins and you fight back the shiver of guilt that runs down your spine. 
“I think I’ll be okay. Might be a visit made best alone, but I really appreciate you even asking.”
“Let me know if you change your mind. You know I’m always gonna be there for you, no matter what. Right?”
Warmth. Strength. Oblivion. 
“I know. Thank you.”
4. “I don’t have anyone else but you.”
“Why are we doing this again?”
“Because we can’t sleep and have nothing better to do.”
“That’s bullshit and you know it,” you chuckle into your phone, free hand swirling a pot of instant ramen. “I have better things to do at 3 in the morning than watch The Poltergeist with you.” 
“Then go fucking do it,” Corpse laughs teasingly. 
“And leave you high and dry? I don’t have the heart.”
“I mean, you really don’t have to--”
“Seriously, I was awake anyways. Just giving you shit.”
“One of these days, you’re gonna fucking regret it.”
Ramen done and lamp on, you snuggle beneath your blanket and start the traditional countdown to pressing ‘play’ on the movie. Neither of you really had the technology to screen share on this Discord call (your laptop is almost on its last leg and your apartment WiFi can be spotty at times), so it seemed better this way. 
The next roughly 2 hours are filled with laughter, small jump scare yelps, and quiet yelling at the ignorance and twisted logic of horror movie characters. But towards the end of the movie (and arguably the climax), your eyelids start to droop, body succumbing to the warmth of your bed. The screaming and cheesy, orchestrated music are all background noise as your breathing evens out, shifting in and out of consciousness. Ending credits roll on screen before you know it, and the only think that rips you awake is Corpse’s gentle calling of your name. 
“Sorry, fell asleep,” you murmur tiredly and squint at your screen, languidly closing out the window and letting the Discord window take precedence. “Tells you how riveting I found this movie.”
“Should’ve just let you sleep, my bad,” he chuckles. “Thanks for staying up with me.” 
“Yeah of course -- I wanted to, just got a little sleepy. Wanna watch another one?”
“ ‘m actually gonna try to sleep. Don’t wanna bother you too much. You got work tomorrow?”
“Not ‘til noon so it’s okay. You sure?” 
“Yeah...yeah. I’ve only had like...3 hours of sleep lately. Fucking awful.”
“Anything I can do to help?”
“You do enough by just letting me call at the fucking crack of dawn, seriously.”
“I’m your only option, let’s be real,” and your voice is a mix of fatigue, humor, and some bitter sardonicism. There’s no malice intended, and you really hope it’s conveyed accurately. 
“...I don’t have anyone else but you,” he all but murmurs. Your heart clenches painfully, anxiety and fear and love surging through your lungs. Those words don’t hold the connotation you desperately wish for, but what matters most is that he knows he’s not alone and you’re not the only one he’s got. You verbalize as such and he only hums back in a façade of agreement before wishing you a good night. 
And sometimes, while you do know that your girls have your back and that you love them to death and would take a bullet for them any day, there are nights where you really do feel the same.
That you have no one else but Corpse. 
5. “He was never yours.”
There’s nothing you hate more than psychological monsters. You’d probably take physical pain over mind games any day because at least, it’d heal faster to some degree, or there would be a more surefire way of minimizing symptoms. But sometimes, there are days when the egotistical chess players of hell come to wreck havoc on the world, and you get lost in their trap. It’s annoying, a pain in the ass, and affects you a lot more than it should at times. 
This particular instance makes you want to quit. It makes you, Sailor fucking Mars, guardian of the planet of fire and passion and perseverance, leave all of this behind right here and now. You’ve never hated yourself more for feeling so weak. 
You’re not sure what to call it -- altered dimension, distorted reality -- but all you know is that you and the princess are kept in separate cages hanging from an endless ceiling, labelled as baits for tuxedo mask/Corpse to come. The enemy lets you both stew in the confines of the metal, watching with glee as your partner attempts to cut through the rails with her tiara and ultimately fail. It seems they’ve thought of everything because you’re not their #1 enemy today. Or maybe you are. You’re not sure anymore, even as they launch into villainous speech. 
“Nothing brings me more joy than watching you lose all your energy to fight, both physically and mentally. I’ve seen all your dreams and wishes. Nothing’s more fickle and double-edged than love, no? We shall see who the prince really belongs to.”
Mention of the prince has you snapping your head to meet the enemy’s eyes, slowing squinting as they catch yours and begin cackling like your demise is racing at the speed of an oncoming train. Your princess looks confused, but dread is heavy mercury filling your veins because you know, you know, your best held secret is coming to fruition. 
“What the fuck are they talking about?” She hisses across the void. 
“I don’t know,” you lie through your teeth, eyes flicking toward every corner of the cage now to find a way out. This isn’t how you wanted it to happen, much less happen at all. 
“Are they talking about Corpse?”
“Is there any other prince they’re referring to?”
“Do you always have to be a smartass with me?”
“Somebody’s got to,” you allow yourself a slight reprieve of laughter. It’d be dumb to try to set fire to this thing, knowing you’d only burn yourself in the process. Your exorcism tags also have no use and you can hear the clock ticking down in your mind. 
“Think it’s pretty fucking rude to keep a couple of girls in cages, not gonna lie,” a baritone voice cuts through. It sends temporary sparks of relieve down your spine. Perhaps you’ll have a fighting chance to get out of here. 
“Welcome, welcome! I’d like to get straight to the point, but maybe we’ll up the stakes a little bit before you answer my question,” they tease cartoonishly and you want to roll your eyes.
“Is this a fucking test--”
Both you and sailor moon yelp as the cages drop into a miraculously (or not) appearing large body of water, but still hanging just above the surface so you have enough air to breathe. You look out and down to see how deep this pit is, and though it might be some elaborate illusion seemingly defying all laws of physics, you see nothing but descending darkness. You don’t even have to hear the question to know what the enemy is going for, to know that they’re trying to hit you where it hurts the most, and you loathe how cliché and goddamn unfair this whole situation has turned out to be. 
“So, dear prince. Pretend that the fate of the world depends on the princess. Before you are just two girls you know and care for, stuck, captured, and on the brink of drowning. You may only save one. Who would it be?”
It’s fucked up. Corpse seems stunned, perplexed by the question. “What the absolute fuck is this? Just let them go if you had an issue with me.”
“Quite frankly, I have an issue with allof you, so this is only fair. Now, what’s your answer?”
Corpse catches your eyes first. Is it from the water that your eyes seem to be brimming with unshed tears? Is it stubbornness or defeat in the way your hands clench around the cage bars?
And this is why, once again, you hate enemies who strictly play mind games. Confirmation that Corpse would never love you the way you do him, knowledge to the princess that she’s the source of your deepest unhappiness despite the bickering friendship, realization to Corpse that the girl he’s treasured so dearly and maybe unknowingly kept as a bit of a placeholder was doomed to love him -- pain on all of you, lashes and scars on what was once believed to be unbreakable bonds, as soon as the villain explains it all with sick glee. 
“Do I have to give you an answer?”
“If you don’t, I’ll really consider drowning them since I honestly wasn’t before.”
Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.
“Ah, just to make things a little more interesting -- I’m aware you and the princess speak regularly outside of all this.”
They what? This was certainly news to you. 
“And?” Corpse asks somewhat defensively. 
Don’t say it. Don’t tell him. Please don’t--
“Say Mars, don’t you enjoy those late night calls with him, too? Though I must say, meeting in a hospital while your ex-boyfriend is having life-altering emergency surgery seems rather morbid in its own respect.”
You don’t have to look at him to know and hear the gears turning in his brain, the villain allowing this brief silence to let everything sink in. There’s a disbelieving whisper of your name, your real name, but he’s cut off from saying anything more. 
“You have 10 seconds.” 
You know the stories. You know the couple’s tragic end in their previous lifetime. You know that as much as the princess denies feeling anything but annoyance towards Corpse, she looks forward to seeing him. There’s a certain softness that he treats her with, different from the platonic affection that he showers you in. You’ve lied to yourself for too long. 
The countdown has no chance to finish when Corpse spits out a name that’s not yours, your eyes squeezing shut to fight back the tears that threaten to flood over. Everything disappears and you land on your butt -- a quick sweep of your surroundings registers two things: Corpse running over to your princess and the villain standing proudly at the chaos they’ve created. It’s instinct that has brings your powers to surface, arms and fingers quickly notching a fiery arrow with pinpoint aim at the imaginary target on their head. “Move!” You yell at the two and they scramble to gather their bearings and avoid your rage. 
They don’t run or cower. The maniacal grin only grows wider and more sinister and you’re this close to screaming expletives. 
“Hurts, doesn’t it, to know that he was never yours?”
It’s the last thing they say before you release the arrow, watching with no remorse as they burn and disintegrate. When the dust disappears and the dimension shifts back to some abandoned building with an exit, you run. 
You run until your lungs burst, until they scream over the aching of your heart, until your costume dissolves and you’re finally buried under the blankets. You turn on ‘Do Not Disturb’ and only allow notifications from a select few important numbers.
And maybe you’ll keep running. Maybe you’ll go off the grid. Maybe you’ll let your voicemail inbox fill up with unheard messages, apologies that you don’t and never will deserve. 
But the love you feel and cherish will never fade. It’ll run alongside you; a bright, burning star, forever bittersweet--
Forever out of reach. 
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