#And they got a house with several people who weren't me instead

[aftermathing]

.

[cheegu3]

Jake - come back to me

prompt; sadist jake, full prompt - here

summary; you try to escape from your sadist ex-boyfriend who kidnapped you when you broke up; bringing you to his house in the mountains where snowstorms and wild animals were frequent, if you escaped, would the wolf or jake get to you first?

tw / trigger warning; yandere themes, unhealthy relationships, kidnapping, toxicity, dead animals, blood, vomiting

wc; 1.7k

Your sore feet had long started bleeding, surely leaving some trace behind. But you had stopped feeling it a long time ago.

Now, you didn't care much about if he saw the small splotches of blood and chased after you. The coldness attacking your cold feed made you push through; brain in survival mode. All you cared about was getting there before he got to you, because that was only a question of when he would.

It was a race against the clock for your survival.

The forest stretched miles wherever you turned, and the initial optimism you had about reaching anyone who could help you before nightfall, quickly declined as the last beams of the sun started shining through the treetops.

Somewhere in the back of your head, you had a faint memory of a few weeks ago - when you and Jake were lying on the couch in front of the fireplace. Outside, the weather had been terrible, and he had told you of an upcoming blizzard.

You regretted not putting much importance on the warning, as you weren't quite honestly sure if you would survive the night. The wind was howling in your ear, even louder than before and it brushed sharp particles of ice across your skin, making it feel like small cuts.

Nevertheless, you had no choice but to keep pushing with your head down. Sometime, maybe around five minutes ago, visibility had gotten way worse. You weren't sure where you were going or how far you had even walked.

You were stopped in your tracks when you reached a big oak tree. Below it lay what looked like a small animal. The scarlet stood out against the bright white snow.

Slowly you crouched down. You didn't have the heart to leave it there when it looked like it was dying. Animals as well as people were always helped by your big heart.

The hands that inched closer to it were shaking. Then when it hovered right above the injured animal, you made up your mind, and finally let your fingers touch the soft fur.

It didn't move or react. You swallowed thickly, feeling a bit nauseous. It took a lot of bravery to use both hands to roll it over, and when you did so you inhaled sharply and crawled backwards in the snow.

A pair of eyes stared at you, blank and void - it was dead. You turned your head to see if there were any predators around so that you could get an answer to who or what could've done this.

To your horror, you discovered there were several more animals lying around in the snow, face down and bleeding like the one in front of you. They were all just a few meters away, spread out throughout the forest at a great distance.

'' No, no, no...'' you whispered to yourself.

Your hands rubbed at the skin of your throat, trying to control the bile that wanted to rise. Eventually, your head fell forward as you couldn't anymore, vomiting beside the animal loudly.

Sniffles sounded from you when you stood up. Your feet slowly dragged until you had the energy to get away. But it felt like you were in a nightmare; even if you had walked a hundred meters, new animals would pop out in the corner of your eyes, making the tears flow even more than before.

The wind had started to calm down, and a certain eerie quietness - the quiet before a storm, came instead. Then, you heard the sound of a motor in the distance, getting closer and closer to your location.

Ecstatic, you thought you were finally getting rescued by some local, until you realized the possibility of it being Jake. He owned a snowmobile too since he lived so far up the mountains.

The distance between you and the person coming closer was getting smaller. You only had a few seconds to dive behind a tree, hoping the snow pile offered some shielding.

It became deadly quiet.

It seemed the driver had turned off the motor, but you felt a certain uneasiness at not hearing footsteps instead. It was just quiet; even the howling wind had stilled completely.

You shuffled in the snow and pushed yourself up with the help of your forearms. There wasn't a single person in your field of view, not even an object as the snowmobile was nowhere to be seen either.

You made a hasty decision then to sit up fully on your knees and turn your body around the other direction, to see if there was something or someone there.

The second you sat up, a hand pushed you forcefully forward, causing you to dive face-first into the ice-cold snow. After letting out a muffled shriek, you rolled over and brushed the flakes from your face.

The first thing you saw when you were finally able to open your eyes again were two boots. They stood on either side of your legs, almost as if trapping them.

Your eyes dreaded going higher, but you let them anyway. Slowly your gaze wandered up; you started recognizing the clothes, and then it stopped on a very familiar face - Jake.

'' What- '' you sucked air in through your teeth, caught off guard by your whole body having gone cold from the snow melting on your face and hands.

It stung uncomfortably and your teeth clattered when you tried to talk again, '' How-how did...you? ''

You didn't finish the sentence. What you wanted to ask was how he'd found you so fast. It was hard to wrap your head around that fact; how he had found you way faster than you'd expected, days and even hours faster than what you thought.

Jake knew what you wanted to say, an amused smirk spread on his face, antagonizingly slow.

'' I already prepared for this, set up things just in case you would run away. I own these woods, did you know that? ''

'' N-no, '' you pressed out.

'' Now you do. I have cameras everywhere. You looked so stupid and cute running around so cluelessly. Did you even know where you were going? '' he snickered, '' That's why you need me to take care of you! ''

You didn't say anything. Although you weren't really sure what you'd say. He wasn't wrong; you went without a plan, or without any knowledge of the woods, and during a storm nonetheless.

'' I bet you didn't know I have wolves too. ''

Wolves? Was he a psychopath?

'' Just remember that for next time you try to escape, I will use them then. You're lucky if I get to you before they do, '' his amused smirk turned into a grin full of sadistic glee, very unfitting the words that came out of his pretty lips.

Putting on an act, he snapped his fingers and gasped dramatically.

'' Oh right! You probably can't talk because you're freezing to death. Do you want me to save you? ''

Your focus had long disappeared. Your body was much more busy with keeping you alive, as it had started shaking violently now. Small, short breaths left your mouth occasionally and your eyes struggled to stay on your ex.

'' Poor baby, '' he cooed.

You were barely awake, in some kind of daze when he lifted you up. He carried you in his arms and put you down on the snowmobile. The loud humming of the motor kept you from falling asleep as he drove off.

*******

You weren't sure if you actually managed to fall asleep after some time after all. All you remembered was that you got lifted again and carried.

You felt the temperature change and heard the blizzard become muzzled. Jake put you down on some kind of fur in front of a warm fire.

'' You'll feel better soon, '' you heard a voice say far away.

And slowly you did.

The fire spread warmth all throughout your body. You opened your eyes and could tell he was in the room, leering over you. The situation in the woods came back to you very clearly.

You tried pretending you were asleep again, scared that now that you were home you'd get punished for running away. But Jake wasn't that easy to fool, he listened attentively to every noise you made and turned his head whenever you shuffled; waiting for you to get back to normal.

He let you pretend for about an hour until he got fed up with it. You flinched when his hand touched your thigh and then bit your cheek due to your reflexes always giving you away.

'' I know you're awake. ''

Finally, you opened your eyes. Jake had sat down on the couch, his elbows resting on his knees. You swallowed down your fear and met his narrowed eyes.

'' Are you...going to punish me? ''

'' What do you think? ''

You opened your mouth to answer, but he hadn't actually expected one. It was left hanging open as you instead watched him stand up and go over to the kitchen.

While trying to turn, you discovered that you had been tied to the couch so you barely had any room to move around. Instead, all you could do was listen.

Cabinets were opened and a drawer was pulled. Everything around you seemed to turn deadly silent when you heard the familiar sound of something sharp grazing, being dragged against wood.

'' There's no use, '' he haughtily said in response to you starting to thrash around in panic.

You kicked against the cushions and arched your back to try and get out of the ropes. But like he said, there was no use. Your body didn't get any more freed and if anything, your wrists hurt more from the material rubbing against your skin.

The sound got closer and closer, stopping just by your ear. You could turn far enough to see his favorite knife on the armrest. Whimpers left your mouth.

Jake sat down again; despite you closing your eyes shut to distract yourself, you could feel the dip of the couch. It made your breaths turn shaky.

Your wrist was grabbed tightly by his soft fingers, very different from the dark and harsh look he had on his face which promised nothing but softness.

'' Let's play a game, '' he grinned, eyes filled with craze.

'' It's called- if you scream, you die. ''

[dippable]

autism and media. spoilers for criminal minds, my hero academia, and dungeon meshi.

okay so, i'm an autistic person, and i've seen portrayals of autism (both implied and explicit) and they've had.. a range of quality overall.

in explicit examples, i've seen only a few. spencer reid comes to mind first- the autistic savant with an eidetic memory and a penchant for seeming robotic. i, personally, was heavily influenced by this guy- i did (and kind of still do) enjoy criminal minds after all. however, spencer's existence as one of the first explicitly autistic characters that was seen by a wider audience. the show was insanely popular, but in the later seasons (mainly after he was sent to prison) many of his autistic traits seem to fade away. of course, he is a traumatized man who was on high alert for a WHILE, but one would expect he wouldn't lose many of his core personality traits. personally, i think these were written out since his traits weren't seen as "popular", since autistic people can offend those they love or say the wrong thing on accident and it seemed too weird.

second, my hero academia. i don't think any of these characters are explicitly autistic, but i haven't watched in a while. mainly, i see deku and tamaki as autistic (although bakugo, aizawa, and shigaraki are.... suspicious) and i believe my views on these two are mainly influenced by the rest of the fandom, so here goes. overall, i think the characterization of these two lends itself directly to their emotional or anxious nature. most media i see with one or both of them severely dumbs them down to these traits, with tamaki getting the brunt of this treatment. most don't seem to remember that both of them are strong for their age, smart, and have faith in their quirks. even if tamaki might seem pessimistic about fights, he's just that- pessimistic. he's much more inclined to believe he'll lose because if he does, he's prepared to do what he can to help whoever comes after. deku is emotional, yes, but who wouldn't be? he's a teenager who's been told over and over again that he's a failure and he'll never achieve his dream, and suddenly, he's being helped by the #1 hero to become the person that he thought was unattainable. i think horikoshi's representation of them is alright, it's just mainly the fandom that compresses them into "uwu anxious cinnamon rolls too sweet for this earth" instead of remembering they're multifaceted characters, and damaging their own interpretations of real people in the process.

in dungeon meshi, i don't know if they're explicitly autistic (however laios and falin are HEAVILY HINTED AT so.) but the representation of autism here is incredible. in the series, we see laios fuck up with shuro (and, notably, we see the fandom sweep it under the rug because laios is white) while he has real, genuinely close relationships with others (marcille is like a sister to him, and chilchuck's his best friend) so we know he is a multifaceted character. he's also tied to the tendency of autistic people to be interested in fringe interests, or alterhuman circles. he thinks (like many others) that he's weird enough to people, so he throws all caution to the wind and goes all-in on being weird. i know that when i realized i was "too weird" for others, i just stopped caring, and that's how i got into many of my favorite things- like OFF, house of leaves, etc etc. if they thought i was weird then, i don't really want to know what they think i am now, especially since i'm out here playing obscure meta rpgs or reading books that require me to flip them around.

overall, i think the representations of autistic people in media have a long way to go. there is still a critical shortage of autistic poc in media, and many representations of autism are still influenced by the savant stereotype we see with spencer reid (see: the good doctor) and there's still a variety of symptoms that haven't been shown accurately yet. i'm very proud of where we've come, though- now, i can see an incredibly accurate portrayal of myself in laios, but there's still many autistic people who haven't seen someone they can relate to on the silver screen.

[lara-cairncross]

Your TMNT fairies are so beautiful!! I have plenty of questions if you don't mind, sorry if it's a bother haha.

1. How did donnie damage his wings? Or did he appear with it damaged?

2. Did they come from the same laugh? (Probably, but since don's wings, I'm confused.)

3. Is it like the fairy camp situation with april?

4. Were they born at the same time? I mean, if they were born in the same laugh they can't be born at the same time, because it has to be a baby's first ever laugh.

5. What is Splinter's role here?

6. Like the lair games, do you think they participate in the yearly pixie hollow games?

7. Does donnie have his own workplace? Tinker fairies usually work in pairs or teams, right?

That's all for now! I'm so sorry if this is overwhelming, when I saw your AU I screamed because Tinkerbell is my favorite movie series and I love love LOVE the turtles so much and I was so excited and thought about all these scenarios! Sorry, I'm babbling. Anyway, I love these so much! No pressure though, sorry again once this gets to you. (Another apology because I feel bad)

Not a bother at all!! The fact that you're interested enough to ask me questions is a huge compliment 🥹🧡🧡 I'll do my best to answer everything!

Donnie was technically born with the damaged wing! The dandelion seed he was created from got attacked by a bird during its trip to Pixie Hollow, and as a result, his wing was severely damaged by the time he arrived. The wing brace helps him be able to fly, but he's still a much poorer flier than the abled fairies.

Yes, Leo and Donnie came from the same laugh! Hence why they're twins :D Their wing patterns are the same, but Donnie's is damaged on one side. Raph and Mikey, on the other hand, were born from the laughs of the other two babies! All four turtles were created from the same set of human triplets, just a different baby each time :)) Raph was created first, Leo and Donnie second, and Mikey third-- all on the same night!

I wouldn't necessarily call it a fairy camp? The four of them are just very adventurous, and ran into April a long time ago. She was lonely, and the turtles were curious about humans, so they all just kinda got along! And now they hang out in her garden a lot :DD

Kinda answered this one already lmao, but to recap, nope! They weren't all born from the same laugh! Instead, all four of them were created on the same night from human triplets :D Donnie and Leo are the only two who were born from the same child though.

Splinter is a bonafide rat in this au! He's kinda the turtles' surrogate father??? Idk, he basically just lives in the walls of April's house and occasionally goes to rescue them if they do something stupid while they're out on adventures lmao

I think Mikey and Leo would participate at the very least! Raph could also probably be convinced, and it wouldn't be too hard :D Donnie would probably be a lot more reserved about participating in front of people though :((

Yes, Donnie has his own workplace! He actually has two of them: one at Pixie Hollow, and a fairy-sized one in a corner of April's garage! She provides him with basically whatever human materials he needs (lots of paperclips lmao). And, like in the show, Donnie usually works alone on projects. He doesn't really have a "team", but he's not against working with other Tinker Fairies if they're having trouble with something, or if he finds the project interesting.

Hope that answers all your questions so far!! Feel free to send more if you have any, I'm having SO much fun answering these! No need to apologize ❤️🧡🩵💜

[tomorrowsgardennc]

market update // september 14th

drop off versus set up. i get to the market super early, even though setting up takes me 15 minutes, tops. i prefer to avoid the traffic of other vendors setting up, and i like to volunteer around the market before it opens. it's around 50 vendors at this market during the main season (april until december), so it can get busy super quick right before the market opens with everyone coming in at the last minute. not worth the stress when i can just come in early and help others out.

today blew me away. literally. had gusts of wind that were so bad a power pole fell down right outside the parking lot. that means the road that's the main traffic for the market was closed after 30 minutes of being open. that killed sales for *everyone*, including the big bois that sell out every week. coffee barrista vendor said their sales were down to 1/3rd their normal amount because of this. but the die hards willing to brave traffic and walking 2 blocks from parking to the market still made it out.

tue big bois were panicing over sales, but a horrific day in sales for me here still beat a great day of sales at other markets in previous years. no panicing from me, for once. if the road wasn't closed but sales were the same as today THEN i would panic. c'est la vie and all.

my top sellers were the ground cherry produce and the mini flower vases. none of those sales were my normal customers but rather the die-hards just browsing since they weren't eager to get back into traffic. so i met some new faces today, that's good. top reactions to people trying out the ground cherries go to a 3yo trying one, then shaking their head vigorously and then hiding in their mothers hair. another 6yo tried one and then just quickly started eating a whole bunch more. the mom paid for it, blushing, but i thought it was cute.

so imma share a secret with you, tumblr. for me to pass the time, i always wave to the kids who stare at me and tally up how many wave back. my record is 5 in one day. today was only 1. will try and wave better next week.

with it being an unsually slow day, i did end up going home with more than what i came with. but today is also my birthday so that's ok. ton of bread from my favorite bread baker in all the charlotte area, plus bagels, apples, cookies... got 2 large flower bouquets - one for a colleague who passed away this week, and another for me because birthday. thinking about merging all the large flowers together and take them to the place where he worked tomorrow, and keep the small ones for me. idk, i just love smaller bouquets spread around the house instead of one big one.

i didn't take an after-market shot because there was almost no difference at all due to lack of traffic. i did try and get photos throughout the day to share here and i hope that this new series of posts help inspire those who want to or are beginning their business vending journey. i've been vending at several markets and too many events over the past 5 years, so i got a lot of pointers and stories to share. please enjoy.

[starswhisperwritershear]

@any-n-everything Here's why i think Sam and Tucker needed some more thorough development. I mean it's not that they were terrible, and I think the majority of my problems with them suffer from the writing and it being a kids show who's primary goal was to teach kids moral lessons. But Sam had several moments where she disregard what Danny wanted and pushed her own agendas no matter how that affected him and Tucker. Such as the gorilla project (yes it was for Danny's grade but the poor kid got no sleep that night and clearly didn't want to be there), or the one that gets me the most is season 2 episode 1 when she wished Danny and her had never met and then instead of trying to solve the problem in any other way (she already knew at this point that it was the wishing ghost attacking) Like going to get help from any of the other ghost hunter or dealing with the ghost herself which she was shown very capable of doing (and we needed more of because honestly that was a cool aspect of her character) she decided to put her friend, who she supposedly cares about, through the most traumatic experience of his life a second time. She killed him, twice. Because she was the one who egged him on to go in the portal the first time despite him warning her about safety issues, and then she just shoved him in the second time. But then the show wants to convince me she likes him romantically. That's crazy. Not to mention the one time with the trucks that Danny and Tucker liked and she wanted him to use his ghost powers to her advantage despite having in several other episodes berated him for doing the same thing. And (last example I promise) in the show finale when he gave up his ghost powers to protect his family and go back to a normal life because he's been struggling with this for so long, she gets upset! (They all do, I'm not excluding Jazz and Tucker from this, this is just my Sam paragraph). She tells him that she feels she lost a friend and that he's wrong to give up superpowers because now he's not unique or special and she wants friends who are unique and special. Like damn, Sam. Low blow. It's like when a friend only wants to hang out with you to play on your x box and when you don't have the x box they disappear and hate you.

As for Tucker, he's not quite as bad and again I think his character just suffers from the Tv-Y7 rating, but there are a few times where he just straight up disrespects Danny. The only two times we're shown that they get in a fight, Tucker completely does a 180 and makes Danny out to be the bad guy. In the episode where he wishes he has ghost powers he just blames Danny for taking the spotlight and showing off how much better he is, when Danny never did any of that (at that point in the show). Even if Tucker felt that way because of jealousy, he was still really rude with how he spoke to Danny and quite literally put a citizen's life in danger just to upstage Danny. He does it again in the one for where he runs against Dash for class president. (I know that in both of these he was under a ghost influence, but all of the problems started before the ghosts got involved, they just enhanced what he was already feeling.) (And I know Danny and Sam weren't listening to him but that's wildly out of character for Danny and I feel the writers just conformed his personality to the plot to teach the listen to your friends narrative) but he also took that scepter willingly from the mummy ghost. He has like a weird superiority complex that he takes out on people at the most random times. Then in the episode with Nocturne, his best dream is him being all rich and making Danny his janitor! That's not how you think of your best friend! That shows just how much better he thinks he is compared to Danny. Then in the episode where the G.I.W. buys Danny's house and Danny is freaking out, Tucker is like hey man, you have a lot of money now, act like it and enjoy it and calm down. Then gets mad at him when he acts like it and enjoys it! And also he did the same thing as Sam in the finale.

Sorry for the chaotic jumbled mess of thoughts, I have more to say I just can't remember any more specific examples off the top of my head at the moment. But again, he could have worse, I just think they also deserve their own growing and learning moments.

[stevesbipanic]

Steve had always needed glasses.

When he was younger hisnyees weren't that bad but the optometrist had told them they would get worse as he got older. His father heard that as doesn't need them yet. His father thought people who wore glasses were weak. Steve imagined his father was quite the bully growing up and probably pushed around nerds like Steve would later do. Steve's father had told him that he wouldn't be weak, he was a Harrington after all.

The problem with not wearing glasses when you probably should be is certain things become more difficult. Things like being able to read the chalkboard perfectly fine but not the textbook in front of you. Having to squint slightly to recognise people beside you. Getting a headache when he squinted for too long.

By the time he was in high school he was falling behind after scrapping C's. Luckily for him his parents weren't around much anymore. So he got himself glasses. He didn't wear them outside of course, still afraid of his father. But at least at home he could read the chapters they'd covered in class, he could write his notes and write his assignments more legibly. One of his teachers almost failed him for cheating since his handwriting had gotten better.

Several concussions later, Steve's vision was much worse than predicted for the twenty year old. His parents weren't coming back and by now he really didn't care. So he started to wear his glasses more.

The kids didn't seem to care much, Max especially liked another member of the group wearing glasses. Robin cracked a joke that she always knew there was a bit of dweeb inside him. Nancy said they made him look distinguished. Steve had been worried about Eddie's reaction however.

The two boys had only been dating a few months and Steve didn't want to give Eddie any reason to leave. He'd wear the glasses on his drive to the trailer and let Eddie drive if they went anywhere together. He enjoyed Eddie reading to him instead of reading the book himself. He knew where most things were in the kitchen by now that he didn't need his glasses to make breakfast. He'd show Eddie eventually, he just wanted to enjoy this for a bit longer.

Steve had been sick for a week. A harsh cold that he'd caught after looking after half the kids earlier who'd gotten it too. Eddie had made him soup, glad to finally return the favour after Steve had looked after him after the Upside Down. He had his own set of keys to Steve's house by now so he let himself in and heated up the soup.

"Stevie, sweetheart? I made you some soup, baby." Eddie had said softly pushing open Steve's bedroom door.

Steve had been curled up in bed reading one of Eddie's books he'd left there, feeling comforted by Eddie even if he wasn't there. When Steve looked up, Eddie saw the glasses on his face and Steve's eyes widened.

"Aw Stevie what's this? Didn't know colds made pretty boys cuter."

Steve blushed pushing the glasses further up his nose.

"You don't think they make me look weak or weird?"

Eddie placed the soup down and climbed into bed with Steve, cold be damned.

"Stevie, of course not, I think you look cute covered in blood, glasses aren't gonna change that. Who's been saying things like that, the kids?"

"No, my father, I've needed them since I was a kid but he wouldn't let me have them."

Eddie mentally added that to the list of reasons he was going to kill Steve's parents if they ever came back but for now he had a boyfriend to comfort.

"I think they make you look strong and beautiful, love."

"Could you read to me? I can see the words fine now but I like it better when you do it with the voices."

"Of course, sweetheart."

The boys got comfortable and Eddie read until they both fell into a deep sleep. Steve was happy to wear his glasses all the time now, he had plenty of beautiful things to look at after all.

[reticent-writer]

oh oh the oiran one got me thinkin' of a slightly dif concept : reader that is also working for Daki but is also a demon. Suddenly, reader gets chosen by a customer but lo and behold: Two hashira , Giyuu and Kyojuro (imagine that he survives Akaza's attack and didn't get to be a donut). reader is intimidated but tries their best t obviously a low level demon can't take them on in a fight, so they just hide the fact that they are a demon by using an ability that masks that. and then just do the things any normal Oiran does until their customers are satisfied.

demon slayer masterlist

✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･**･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　

You always attended to Daki for anything and everything that she needed but when a customer called on you Daki was quick to push you in their direction.

You went to meet them expecting to see a who was down on his luck but instead saw not 1 but 2 demon slayers. You didn't even have to get close to know that they were stronger than you. You quickly turned around to warn daki.

"Do you want to disappoint me?" She raised an eyebrow at your trembling form.

"Of course not but I-" You were cut off by the back of her hand across your face. A crisp slap.

"Then go and do your job." She came close to your face so she could whisper in your ear, "Who are you more afraid of? Me or 2 demon slayers?"

She didn't want to hear your answer and walked away.

Using your demon art(whatever you want it to be) You masked your 'demon scent'.

-----

"Did both gentlemen ask for me?" You smiled and looked between the 2 slayers. They were so strong, that you started to think they were Hashira but quickly shook that thought from your head.

"Yes we did," Giyuu said, he looked uninterested in his surroundings while Rengoku was taking everything in. You lead them to your room.

The three of you had a pleasant conversation (mostly you and rengoku) but you weren't an Oiran and you knew what almost everyone came to the redlight district for. So you started to disrobe.

Rengoku grabbed your hands before you pulled off your kimono.

"There is no need to disrobe, miss, we did not come for that. We are here for information. There have been many reports of missing people here so I will ask. Have you heard of any suspicious activity from the woman in the house?" His hand was still on yours and he talked.

You slowly pulled away, "I'm sorry but I haven't heard anythin-" There was a sword at your throat quickly silencing you. Giyuu was behind you ready to slice the moment you moved.

"Weapons aren't aloud in the red light district sir." You tried to tell him but he didn't care.

"Neither are demons." Rengoku's once happy and light tone turned dark as he had his chest pressed against yours and his sword at the back of your throat. You tried to back up but you back hit Giyuu's chest.

Your fucked from both directions.

"I will ask again but differently this time. Are you the only demon here?"

'crap' You thought there is no way out. If you call for Daki you'll die before she gets to you and if you don't say anything you'll die. But what if you comply with them.

You wanted even the slighted chance that you'll live you so you comply.

"There are 2 others but they're strong."

"Where are they?" Giyuu demanded to know.

"I don't know, they could be anywhere in this building or others."

Giyuu and Rengoku looked at each other like they could read each other's mind before it was Rengoku's turn to question you.

"Have you ever killed someone?"

"Yes but never by choice. I only do what I'm told." You were honest Daki made you do her dirty work when you had first been turned into a demon.

'To toughen you up' she said.

"How many?"

"I don't know."

"Your name."

"Y/n."

"I liked the conversation we had y/n but you have killed an unknown number of people because a demon tells you to. You cannot be allowed to live."

In a final effort to leave with your life you scream.

"DAKI."

But the moment you do your head is severed, you screamed until you couldn't.

------

Rengoku really did like your conversation, he just wished that you weren't a demon.

✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･**･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　

[ssouhekii]

ʲᵉˡˡʸᶠⁱˢʰ ᵃⁿᵈ ˡⁱᵗᵗˡᵉ ᵇˡᵃᶜᵏ ᶜᵃᵗ - ᵖᵃʳᵗ ᵗʷᵒ ☆ .° • . °

☆ ˢⁱᵍᵐᵃ & ᶜʰⁱˡᵈ!ᵒʳᵃᶜˡᵉ!ʸ/ⁿ - * ☆ . °

☆ wc - 3.3k

Sigma and his little guest eat dinner. The guest, now known as y/n, is introduced to the house. Who knew a home could be this big?

warnings: implied child neglect. y/n's only hobbies are staring and making awkward silences. sigma tries to be serious but sees the ●.● stare and fails

a/n: sigma: wow this kid probably hates me. why are they looking at me did i do something wrong? am i scaring them?

y/n: woww funny man hair swish swish

PART ONE > NEXT PART

You were pretty sure nobody needed their house to be this big.

Before you and Mister Sigma had arrived to the port, he had told you that he was taking you to his home, and that it was called the Sky Casino, and that he would make you some dinner once they got there.

You weren't all that sure what a casino was, but dinner sounded nice.

Your jaw had nearly dropped as the two of you made your way up to his home. To you, homes had always been the cozy little houses people in your small town lived in, or that small white hospital room they'd put you in when the visions started. "This is your home," they told you. "This is where we live."

For a while, "home" had even been a large hollow tree you'd lived in after the hospital flooded. That being said, to you, homes were always small.

You were sure you could fit a million tree trunks in Mister Sigma's home.

He'd led you up a few flights of stairs, and stopped in a large room that he told you was "his office."

Up until the point when he opened the door in the corner of his office behind the desk, you'd been in too much shock to register anything he was really saying. His words were drowned out by magnificent hanging lights with warm yellow glows, people shouting and swaying by each other, entranced by music and games. You could have lost yourself watching as dice rolled past on magnificent redwood tables stacked with delicious meals, glistening more than you'd ever seen. This environment being a place that one could live in, sleep in, even breathe in, day and night, mystified you. You were simply in awe at the man for having so, so much.

This was why, after being led to a small door in the corner of an office, far away from the music and lights and games, you were a bit confused when he finally told you "Welcome Home."

As far as you had seen, "Welcome Home" wasn't an invitation, it was a presentation. When anyone had told you "welcome home," they had been presenting you with their place of living. Perhaps even your place of living, too.

So, you didn't understand why, instead of presenting you with all that glamour and joy, Mister Sigma "welcome homed" you into a standard hallway, lined with pictures and a coat-rack, just like any ordinary home.

He led you through the off-white hall, exiting into a decently-sized living room with a brown leather couch facing to your left, a black coffee table in front of it, several bookshelves with a television in the middle of them, and a marble bar counter to your left.

"So, this is my, uh, home. The room you can stay in is right by the kitchen, I'll show you later..." Evidently, he seemed anxious, and you watched his two-toned hair sway behind him as he paced into his kitchen. You followed close behind.

"Are you hungry? I'll make some dinner."

You met his eyes as he turned to you, and you nodded.

"What would you like to eat?"

Frankly, you hadn't thought all that far. You were just hungry, since you hadn't eaten since earlier that morning when Mister Sigma's white-haired friend brought you some sort of granola square.

The card over his face had glistened as he told you it was birthday-cake flavored, and that you needed lots of protein to grow up big and strong. After a bite, you had set it down. It tasted disgusting.

Apparently, he'd disagreed with you, and began talking about how birthday cake was the best flavor. You'd watched as his blue eye darted from side to side, never seeming to be able to focus on one thing. After a few minutes of his random birthday cake facts, he'd ask if you were going to eat the rest. You shook your head, no, and watched him down the rest of the square in one bite.

Needless to say, you didn't know what you wanted to eat, you were just hungry.

You took a moment to ponder. You didn't really have a favorite dish or anything. In your town, in the hospital, in that room earlier that day, you just ate what you were given. Some of it you liked, some of it you didn't, but the option was the thing placed in front of you or nothing at all.

You'd always had a choice of what to eat in the forest, though. You spent many a day picking berries, catching fish, or just flat out eating leaves that you found. Sometimes you got sick, but you were always fine in the end.

Did Mister Sigma have any fish? You didn't feel like eating fish, but you didn't want the sweetness of the berries right now. You wondered what the word for that was.

"Well? Why don't you sit down and I'll tell you what I have in the fridge right now."

Mister Sigma's words pulled you out of your own head and you looked around the kitchen, then back at him.

"You can just sit over there," he said, motioning to a wooden table behind the bar-counter. It had three wooden chairs, and you made your way to one quickly. The chair was a little big, but you managed to hop up and take a seat at it. You met his eyes when you had taken your place, seeing he had opened the fridge in front of him.

"Well, I've got some fruit, baby carrots, leftover macaroni and cheese.."

Your options seemed limited. You kept staring at him as he waited for a response.

"It's your choice, I could really eat anything..."

He shifted on his feet and then looked back to the fridge.

"Macaroni it is, hope that's fine."

You gave your head a little nod, though he didn't see. You couldn't quite remember what macaroni was, but you remembered it tasted good.

You continued to watch his hair swish, swish, swish behind him as he moved around the counter. He tossed the mac and cheese into two bowls, grabbed some napkins and spoons, and carried the meal to the table. You swung your legs back and forth as he set it in front of you.

The bowl was warm, and you lost all focus on Mister Sigma as you took your spoon and immediately began to eat. The taste of warm cheese immediately filled your mouth, and you instantly perked up a little.

You ate quickly, until halfway into the bowl you looked up to see him watching you. His meal looked almost untouched.

"I take it you like my mac and cheese, yeah?"

You gazed into his eyes, your cheeks full of noodles. You nodded quickly.

"That's, uh, good. Don't eat too fast or you'll get a stomach ache..." he trailed off yet again.

Glaring at him, you continued to shovel macaroni into your mouth at lightning speed. When finished, you dropped your spoon into the bowl and pushed it towards him.

Mister Sigma, still having eaten less than you, lowered his spoon from his mouth. He glanced at the bowl then into your eyes, which continued to watch him with a piercing stare.

He swallowed, then glanced towards your empty bowl again.

"Nikolai told me you hadn't eaten today, but I didn't think you were this hungry..." He looked at his own bowl. "Would you like some more?"

You widened your eyes slightly at him. You weren't aware that you could have more than one serving of this heavenly ambrosia. Being offered seconds, no matter where you were, was alien to you.

Alas, you were full. You were sure the gods weeped as you denied their gifts.

Actually, you were just a little dismayed at how small your stomach was. So, with a heavy heart, you looked down and shook your head.

Mister Sigma sighed a little. "You're allowed to have more if you're still hungry. You're still growing, you know," he mumbled. There was no anger in his tone, and for a moment you felt the same discomfort he did.

You shook your head again, and he paused. "Alright," he whispered, and you watched as he continued eating.

After a few bouts of him glancing up nervously to meet your unending stare, you shifted your gaze to behind him.

On the wall behind Mister Sigma was a vibrant oil painting of The Fish Who's Name You Forgot. Backed by a vibrant ocean blue, the creature could have almost bobbed off of the canvas and into the room. The light from the painting reflected off its purple blob-body and created an almost rainbow off of its glistening white tentacles. Bubbles swirled around the creature and even through it, if the jelly-like consistency of its body was to be believed. Mister Sigma, apparently wishing to join in on your wonder, turned around to look at the painting.

"Do you like it? I saw it at a gallery I went to."

He turned back to you. You nodded, and drew your finger up slowly to point at him.

"Looks like you."

His eyes widened in confusion.

"You think the jellyfish..." Yes, jellyfish. You remembered the name now. "You think it looks like me?"

You squinted at him for a moment before returning to your usual empty stare. "Mhm. Your hair."

He almost looked to his stray strands of hair, but stopped himself.

Well, I can see why you'd think of it that way," he muttered. "I never really considered that. It's very interesting."

He grabbed your empty bowl, then his, and got up suddenly. You stayed sitting where you were. The chair was comfortable, after all.

Mister Sigma returned to the table after a few moments, empty handed.

"So... kiddo. I'd uh, I'd really like to know your name. Since, you know, you live with me now."

When you had first met him, you hadn't known this. Now, his reasoning for wanting to know that made a little more sense.

Also, with a full stomach, you felt a bit more friendly.

"Y/n," you whispered cautiously. "Zero, Three, Eight." You weren't sure if he had wanted to know your name from your town or your name from the hospital.

"Zero-three-eight?" He repeated after you in confusion.

You simply nodded.

"What does that mean?"

"It's my name at the doctor's."

His mouth let slip a little "oh," and he glanced to the side before sharply inhaling and looking back to you. His usual nervous look had turned into a serious, slightly stern expression.

"Well, y/n," he placed special emphasis on your name for some strange reason. "I think we need to set up some house rules."

You returned his stern gaze with a wide-eyed stare. You weren't quite sure why your eyes went wide at the thought of rules. If you had to guess, it was because you'd spent so long in the forest, doing whatever you want. You weren't sure why the silver haired man with the mustache had picked you up and carried you to a place where there were rules, but you weren't all that enthusiastic about it.

On the other hand, another thought occurred to you, which was that there were always rules, it was just that nobody had ever bothered to tell you them before. In your town, in the hospital, you had simply had to figure out what you'd done wrong while they were chastising you for it.

You hoped that this warning would be enough for you.

"Don't worry, you're not in trouble, I just want to set up some boundaries," he continued in a gentler voice, perhaps after noticing your look. "Do you know what boundaries are, y/n?"

You only had a general idea, so you hesitated before nodding your head again slowly.

"Boundaries are when you tell someone what you are and aren't comfortable with so you can both be happy. Do you understand that?"

Again, only a nod.

"Alright," Mister Sigma stopped and looked away for a moment to think. "First of all, if something happens, you need to tell me, alright?"

You glanced to the side, then squinted at him, doing your best to convey that you needed further clarifying. "Somethings" happened a lot, in your opinion.

"By something happening, I mean if you get hurt, or you knock something over, or uh, " he paused. "You know, things like that."

You returned to your typical stare with a quiet "okay."

"Right. By the way, if you see anything shiny looking on the counters or dressers, be careful with them, alright?" He looked to his side again, then back to you. "And don't draw on anything except the paper I give you, okay? Especially not on the walls."

You didn't know how to draw. Oh well.

"And, uh, don't stay up too late. Try to be in bed by the time I am, alright? Hopefully that's not too late for someone your age..."

He trailed off, and had seemed to run out of ideas.

"That sound good?"

"Yeah."

You both sat in silence for a couple moments more before he hopped out of the chair.

"So, I guess I better show you your room, right..?"

You stood up to follow him down a hall in almost the corner of the living room. It was spacious and well lit, but almost felt empty for lack of decoration beyond hanging paintings.

He passed a door before turning to his left, his hair swaying the opposite direction before complying.

"This is the guest bedroom, you can stay here for now. Unless you like the other guest room better, though I haven't cleaned up since Nikolai last stayed.." This Nikolai seemed to be an interesting character to you. You weren't sure what type of person was allowed to make a mess in Mister Sigma's house.

He looked down to you, and smiled a little. "What do you think of Nikolai? He seemed to like you a lot."

You narrowed your eyes a little.

"Who's that?"

Mister Sigma almost seemed a little shocked. "You met him today, right? The one with white hair, in a braid."

Suddenly, the man with the card on his face came back to you. You let out a little "Ohh," before looking away.

That Nikolai definitely seemed like the type to be disorganized.

"Loud," you muttered, not sure how Mister Sigma would respond to hearing you say this. Instead of scolding you for saying rude things about other adults, he chuckled. "I'd say he is, isn't he?"

Mister Sigma turned away and motioned to a bed. He told you it was where you could sleep. It was larger than any bed you'd ever seen, a completely different world from the dry, tiny cots you had spent most of your slumber on. Then, he led you to a door beside the bed.

"Here's the restroom," he opened it, then closed it again. "Feel free to use any of the products in there."

He led you out through the bedroom door, and you made a note to yourself to explore the almost sparkling bathroom later. You hadn't even known a bathtub could be that big.

Down the hallway, he pointed out the other, less tidy guest bedroom, the other door to the bathroom, his office behind two glass doors, and finally his own bedroom.

"This is my room," he directed you. "Knock on the door if you need something."

Mister Sigma was firm about this, and even repeated it. How strange.

With that, your tour ended, and Mister Sigma began to walk back down the hall. You followed him, and he turned around.

"It's alright, we're finished. You can go off and explore, or get washed off if you'd like. I've got some work to do, so I'll be in my office."

You had to admit you were a little dissapointed at his leaving you. You had enjoyed watching his movements and picking up on his mannerisms. Mister Sigma moved quite smoothly, which was a comforting contrast to the janky and sudden movements of some people you'd met before.

As he paced away, you made your way back to the bathroom, hoping to figure out why anyone would need a tub that big.

☆ . ° • . ☆ * .°

Sigma closed the door to his office, and checking the outside to see that y/n was gone, let out a deep sigh. Halfway through trying to make up some house rules that weren't just reiterations of things he told Nikolai every time he visited, Sigma realized the reality of his situation.

He had absolutely no plan at all for this child.

While he'd been aware that he hadn't really been able to get any supplies, the full 18-wheeler only hit when he actually brought the kid into his home.

Sigma moved to his desk, and sat down while his computer booted up. He grabbed a notebook and clicked his pen open.He opened to a blank page, and for lack of a better title, wrote "Stuff for children" at the top.

Sigma crossed out "children" and wrote y/n, then held his pen over the name as if he were going to cross it out too.

Y/n hadn't really had as much energy as the children he'd met or even babysitted. However, they weren't necessarily shy either, and were even blunt at times.

He really didn't know what he needed to get for someone with no past and no belongings.

If anything, clothes would be a good start. Sigma also put down "shoes," as he didn't think a single pair of grippy socks would survive for long.

Before even turning to his computer, Sigma thought back to himself. When he'd first gotten out of the desert, he'd needed to do something like this for himself.

Back then, Sigma had felt a little lost. Now, he was almost grateful Dostoevsky left him to fend for himself.

Once he was in his flow, Sigma amassed a decent list of necessities for anyone who had appeared out of nowhere. Food, hair products, blankets, et cetera. Sigma had to admit that he may have indulged himself a bit by putting down hair products. Anyone who knew him knew he also loved things like that, as proved of the healthy quality of his hair.

The sound of the shower turning on snapped him back to reality. He told himself not to go that far, and that a six-year-old didn't care about things like that.

He left it on the list anyways.

Sigma, at a loss for what kinds of foods a child would eat, decided that he couldn't feed them the casino's food all the time. Maybe he ate it, but kids needed to grow.

Sigma leaned back in his chair. Maybe he needed to grow, too? Perhaps if he ate more than the casino's cooking, he'd grow taller than Dazai. Sigma shooed away that silly thought, because as far as he was concerned he was still a full-grown adult. He opened his browser and searched "what do kids eat."

The two-toned manager was almost blown away by how much information a single search gave him. Most of it was useless, marketing to him vitamin gummies and mineral water and special pressed juices that probably tasted atrocious. However, from his research, he gathered that he needed to buy more vegetables, chicken nuggets, juice, and candy.

Apparently, it was easier to handle children if you had candy.

Sigma, recalling his earlier trip to the fridge, realized that he only had vegetables and wine, which was technically juice. but not the type you'd give a six-year-old.

Sigma's heart dropped.

He and y/n would have to go to the supermarket tomorrow.

[unseededtoast]

Turtle Doves | Joel Miller

Part Eleven

Chapter Directory

Series Summary: In which two broken souls connect so deeply, that if one should perish, the other would surely die of a broken heart. (slow burn, timeline changes. After TLOU1, before TLOU2, assumed knowledge of infected, uses elements from both show and game)

Series Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, death, and sexual content.

Also cross-posted on Wattpad and AO3. Link to my masterlist for everything else I’ve posted!

"I don't feel right dragging you into these things. We got lucky the past two times but sooner or later luck runs out."

After walking several miles in the heat, Joel eventually finds a shaded spot for us to take a break. He puts his things down and walks off, leaving me by myself. Without thinking about my actions, I put my bag down and sit, bringing my knees up to my chest. What I should be doing is ripping the map out of my bag and taking note of where the other stars are located, but I can't seem to make my arms move.

A small part of my mind thinks I'm overreacting. At the end of the day, nothing happened to me, they weren't able to fulfill their twisted plans. But I can't seem to shake the ghostly feeling of the man's hands on my hips, the feeling of him trying to get my pants off. My chest can still feel the man on top of me, holding me hostage against the floor. Is this what the children felt before they were murdered? The thought of children experiencing, to a harsher extent, what I just did is an unbearable thought.

Joel walks back to me and wipes his hands on his pants. From my peripheral I can see him look down at me, but he doesn't say anything. Truthfully, there are no words he could say that would break my mind out of this foggy trance. It's almost surreal to think about what could have happened if Joel wasn't there to save me. As the thought dawns on me, I look up to him. I see dried blood on his hands and some splattered on his shirt.

I know I should be thanking him vehemently right now, but it's as if my mouth has been sewn shut. My body has weirdly shut down on me, maybe as some sort of stress response or something. His eyes tear away from me and he puts his bag on his back, probably wanting to keep going. We still have a few more hours of sunlight left and we need to make the most of it. Staying out here in the open at night is not a situation I want to be in. So I force myself up and put my bag back on my shoulders.

Our boots crunch the small pebbles on the pavement as the two of us move forward. Typically, during these bouts of silence my mind is on the killers, but only the recurring images of the men back at the town are found. With each step I try to work through the thoughts, knowing I can't allow myself to be stuck in this state of mind forever.

When I left Boston I knew that people like them were out here. I guess a delusional part of me just never thought I'd actually encounter them. It's obvious to me now that I had been completely ignorant and naive when I decided to go to Omaha. Had Joel not been there with me, I likely would have died in that town. And this trip would have been made in vain.

Instead of dwelling on what could have been, I guess I should be thankful that it ended when it did. Some people don't get as lucky as I did, if luck is really the right word to describe the situation. Those men are dead now, no longer able to prey upon anyone else who stumbles into their town, and for that I am thankful.

Joel and I walk until the sun begins setting and we find ourselves in a less-than-ideal spot. There are really no places to hunker down for the night, no houses or businesses for miles. We're passing through a part of the country that's mainly taken up by forest. By the time we find somewhere to call it a night, the moon is fully up in the sky.

There's a small campground tucked away in some trees, I can make out the silhouettes of campers through the woods. My hearing becomes hyper-aware of the surroundings, listening for any infected, or people, that may be watching us. Snapping twigs and branches are the only sounds I can hear, but that doesn't stop me from being paranoid.

We choose an average-looking camper on the outskirts and make sure it's clear before we take our bags off our backs for the night. It's arguably one of my favorite parts of the day. The camper is a plain beige in color, but alike other buildings, is now adorned with vined plants. There's a small fire pit in front of it, surrounded by run-down chairs, but it's more than enough for me.

Joel lets me in the camper as he goes about trying to find firewood. Out in the middle of nowhere it's probably safe to start a fire. Sure, there's still some risk but it's not nearly as high as it would be near a town. While he goes off to do that, I place my bag on the floor in front of the pull-out bed. There's only one bed in the camper, and I know I'm going to give it to Joel. It's quite literally the very least I can do for him, and I feel guilty for staying silent all day now that I've had time to process what happened in town.

While Joel is gone, I take the time to clean up the bed for him. I strip the old sheets from the mattress and rummage around until I find a clean set up in one of the cupboards. They're a nice airy linen and I know fresh sheets are hard to come by nowadays. I tuck the corners underneath the mattress, put the new pillow cases on, and smooth out the top sheet. As a finishing touch, I fold the top down to make it look nice for him.

Feeling overly cautious tonight, I wait for him to return before I leave the camper. I hear wood clattering to the ground upon his arrival, he must have found some decent pieces. The camper door squeaks as I exit, and he spares me a glance before constructing the fire. I sit in one of the chairs while he lights the wood, watching as it smokes before catching the flame. He takes his bag inside the camper as well, but comes back only seconds later. Taking a seat across from me, we both stare into the fire.

The flames flicker and dance with shades of orange and yellow, giving us warmth for the chilly night. My eyes glance up to Joel, who's staring at the fire with intensity, like he's deep in thought. I know I've put this off for too long, and I clear my throat to finally break the silence. I'm not sure what I want to say, and a simple thank you seems too mundane for what he did for me. I bite the inside of my cheek and decide to just find the words as I go. He looks up to me, waiting for me to spit something out.

"Um, I want to say thank you for what you did back there." I'm unable to keep eye contact with him, my eyes turn down from his.

"Was nothin'." He casually speaks, his voice gruff from not using it all day. My head shakes back and forth, knowing he's lying.

"No, it wasn't nothing. You've saved my life twice now, and what have I done for you? Got us into situations where we both could've been killed." Guilt lays heavy in my stomach and I start to feel ashamed of myself. Finding some shred of courage, I look back up to him.

"Coulda happened to anyone." He reasons, but I know he's only being polite. I'm not sure why he's being so cordial about it, most people would be furious I almost got them killed. Nervously, I lace my fingers together and pick at the skin next to my thumbnail.

"Maybe so, but I don't feel right dragging you into these things. We got lucky the past two times but sooner or later luck runs out. What I'm trying to say is that I'm giving you an out. You don't have to let me tag along anymore, it's okay. I understand." As the words leave my mouth, I feel stinging tears in my eyes. I'm frustrated with myself for risking this man's life, mad at myself for being so useless. Joel's eyes stare into mine, and I can almost swear he can see into my soul.

"If I left behind everyone who I got into a sticky situation with, I'd have nobody." His words are slow and intentional. A nagging thought eats away at me,

"You have a family to get back to, Joel. Those people miss you, they need you. I don't have anyone waiting for me." The truth hurts when I hear it out loud, and it's like someone has stabbed me through the heart as I put my thoughts into the world. Joel shakes his head, disagreeing with what I'm saying.

"What about James?" I almost laugh at his words, but play it off as a cough and rub my nose.

"James? No. He just keeps me around because I bring in the extra ration cards. I think his wife hates me if I'm being honest." I grimace, knowing that James' wife definitely doesn't like me, and only tolerates me because she too benefits from the pill running.

"He cares about you." Joel's words are unusually soft and genuine. I put my restless hands on my knees and shift my weight around in the chair.

"Well, that may be so, but he's not family. I lost mine ten years ago. But you still have yours, you need to get back to them alive. These days family is the most precious thing to have, and I'll never forgive myself if something happens to you because of me." My throat constricts with emotion, and images of my late husband and precious baby pop in my mind. The tears from earlier fall down my cheeks, and I try to wipe them casually so Joel doesn't see.

The conversation seems to die, the crackling fire fills the air. My chest rattles with a jagged breath and I chew on my bottom lip to keep from losing it all. Joel rubs his hands together and opens his mouth, but closes it. A deep frown has settled on his face, but I don't push him for answers. Instead, I focus my attention down to my hands and pick the hangnail I started earlier. The skin is almost peeled off completely until Joel's voice speaks up.

"What are you going to do after Omaha?" He asks, and it's the last thing I figured he'd ask me. My eyebrows raise slightly and I shrug.

"Probably go back to Boston. There's nothing for me anywhere else." He nods his head and looks back into the fire.

"I meant what I said back by Boston, it's still safer if we travel together. I'm not takin' the out." He says as he stares into the flames. My eyes stare at his face intently, trying to figure out why this man is being so forgiving and kind to me. He owes me no loyalty and in fact, I'm the one who owes him. I owe him more than I can ever repay.

"How far do you have to travel after Omaha?" Curiosity gets the best of me, and I'm taking his newly conversational attitude as an invitation to ask my own questions. He puffs out a breath,

"A while. I'm headed out to Wyoming." He says and I can tell he's withholding some information, which is fine. I know he's likely only doing so to protect his family's whereabouts, and after all, I'm still pretty much a stranger to him. I've only known him for a handful of days.

"That's quite a ways. But I'm sure they'll all be happy to see you again." The thought of having a family to return to makes my heart ache with a longing that I know can never be filled. My fingers grasp the gold chain around my neck, and I see Joel's eyes on the necklace, but he doesn't say anything.

What I wouldn't give to be able to hold my baby one more time. I miss his little hands reaching out for me, begging to be picked up. His laugh that used to carry through the house. And I miss Ryan's touch, his cool and confident nature. I miss the way he used to come home with a dozen colored roses, knowing that even though I was a florist, I still loved being gifted flowers. He would always pick "the most beautiful ones for his most beautiful girl" he always told me. They were the lights of my life, and since that fateful night, my heart has been filled with the ash of the extinguished flame.

Before I can stop them, tears run down my face and I can only hope the darkness of night masks them. How can I possibly be okay with following Joel, putting him at risk, when I know what his stakes are? He probably has his own kid waiting for him, his own wife worried if she'll ever see him again or not. I wish I could make him go so that I'm not a liability.

My sniffling nose gives away that I'm crying and I quickly get up from my spot, not wanting to burden Joel with my own issues. I turn away from him and walk into the woods, but not far enough that I lose sight of the fire. Strained sobs come over me, the stress and sadness of the day all coming down on me at once. Maybe I'm just too fragile to be doing this, maybe I simply am just not strong enough.

I slouch against a tree and put my head in my hands, wiping the tears and rubbing my nose. I haven't cried this much since the first year of the outbreak and here I am, faced with adversity and crumbling under the pressure. It's pathetic, and I hate that I'm not resilient enough to handle things better.

Once my tears dry I decide to just stay out here in the tranquil woods for a little longer. While I sit here, I try to prepare myself for Joel going back on his word, saying that he's going to be taking the out after all. Maybe he mulled over my words and realized that I am right, that he needs to get rid of me and get back to his family. I wouldn't blame him in the slightest.

After a while I notice the flame of the fire dying out, and so I force myself to get up and go back, no matter how humiliating it is. My boots stomp down the overgrown vegetation as I return and luckily there's still a small flame going. Joel's leaning up against the camper, his arms crossed over his chest. He hears me walking and looks over.

"I'll stay out here for the night to keep watch. There's um, I saw a pull-out bed in there." My hand gestures towards the camper, insinuating that I want him to take it. His eyes narrow and his head shakes,

"No that's okay, I can take watch." He says and I can't help but feel anger rise in me. I take a breath,

"No, I want you to take it. Please, take it. You saved me from the infected, you saved me from those men back there. It's the least I can do and doesn't even begin to repay what you've done. So please, take it." My voice is strained, and it comes out harsher than I intend it to. I drop my hand back down to my side and return to my seat by the fire pit, the smoke burning my lungs as I deeply breathe it in.

"You don't owe me anything." His words cause me to no longer be able to bite my tongue and all of my pent up emotions pour out,

"Joel, I swear if you fight me on one more damn thing I say I'm going to lose my fucking mind. Please, take the bed. This is something I can actually do for you, so please, let me." My voice is full of finality. I stare at him with wide eyes until he finally moves, and thankfully he doesn't fight me. Instead, he turns and opens the camper door, retreating inside for the night.

With a huff, I turn around in my seat and run a hand over my face before I toss another log onto the fire. I curl up in the seat and hug my knees close to me, resting my chin on my kneecaps.

Tonight my thoughts are occupied with Joel and where we go from here. It's clear that he's not going to leave, he's stubborn as hell about staying true to his word. Deep down I know I'm far too inadequate to be making this trip, but I can't be the reason he never returns to his family. The sadness from earlier morphs into resolve, and I promise myself to be stronger and smarter. For Joel, his family, and for the children I'm seeking to avenge.

The start of this journey shows me that I have to become tougher to survive this. This world is not for the weak, and right now I am weak. My time in Boston gave me the illusion that I was tough because I was able to smuggle pills and stand up to men I know wouldn't have touched me. But out here, I have no guarantees of safety anymore. The QZ is a playground in comparison.

Throughout the night I have to keep getting up and walking around to keep myself awake. The warmth of the fire invites me to fall asleep, but I can't. I promised Joel that I would stay up, and I can't go breaking my promises to him. I'd be lying if I said my eyelids weren't heavy, in fact, I think they weight about twenty pounds each now. At one point, I find myself smacking my cheeks to stay alert. The sounds of owls and crickets in the night doesn't help my cause. I'm stuck in the most picturesque place to sleep but am not allowed to indulge.

After hours and hours of keeping myself awake, I hear the morning birds start singing their songs and the warm glow of the morning sun can be seen. I slouch down in my seat, happy that the morning is finally rolling around. However, my happiness is short lived as I realize we still have to walk all day long.

The door of the camper opens and my head whips around to see Joel walking out, his wavy brown hair tousled from his restful night. He rubs his eyes and yawns as he comes to the fire pit, and I find myself yawning right after him. He's up earlier than I thought he would be, but I'm not complaining, it got lonely out here after a while.

I stretch my legs out in front of me and look over to Joel, who's taken the seat next to me. His face still looks like he's half asleep as he blankly stares at the dying fire in front of us.

"Go on and get some sleep." His deep, raspy morning voice says. A faint blush finds its way on my face at the tone of his voice, but I quickly push the thought from my mind.

"We gotta get going though." I say, yawning again. Joel looks to me with an incredulous look on his face.

"Don't fight me on it, just go do it. I'm gonna scout this place for a car, see if I can't get one of 'em started." He says and runs a hand over his face to wake himself up.

"Well I can help you." I offer and he shakes his head and stares at me with an expression that lets me know he's not thrilled I'm arguing with him already. He sighs,

"And you were tellin' me not to fight you." I look away from him. I know he has a point but I don't want to admit it. I shrug my shoulders, my stubborn nature not letting me cave.

"I'm not fighting, I'm offering help." I rebut. His eyebrow raises,

"I'm not tellin' you again. Go get some rest. If I need you, I'll come get you." He says, voice warming up for the day, the deep rasp disappearing as he speaks.

"What if something happens?" I ask, knowing that bad things can happen in the blink of an eye. My tone must tell him I'm not fighting, but instead am genuinely worried.

"Nothing is going to happen. I'm not going far and I keep an eye on my surroundings." He reassures me, and I know he's telling the truth. Well, about him being cautious anyways. He knows how to survive in this world.

Reluctantly, I get up and accept his offer, the thought of sleeping on a mattress is far too tempting. I open the camper door and enter it, seeing our bags placed side by side. The sheets on the bed are rustled and I smile to myself, happy that I was able to do that for him, and I hope he slept well because of it. Taking a few steps across the camper, I crawl onto the bed and sprawl out, thankful for the mattress. Compared to my mattress at the QZ, this is like sleeping on a cloud.

Rolling onto my side, I grab a handful of the sheets and breathe in the freshness. Joel's scent hits my nose, a mix of smoke from the fire and cotton flannel. It's a warm, comforting smell and I close my eyes to appreciate it.

His smell makes me feel safe, it lets me know that he's here and he's watching out for us. The rugged smell lulls me to sleep, and for once I'm not haunted by the images of the murdered children or the ghostly feeling of the men in the town.

Part Twelve

[takerfoxx]

All right, one of the main things I talk about on this blog are ships, so here's a quick rundown of my favorites.

Kyoko Sakura/Sayaka Miki (Puella Magi Madoka Magica

Ah, KyoSaya, my beloved. What can I say about them? Let's start with how they are each other's perfect foils, with several important similarities to draw them together while several major differences to keep that spicy clashing. They are the perfect example of soulmates, two characters who, when in opposition, constantly get worse and worse, but when they're on the same page, they bring out each other's best qualities. Not bad for a relationship that started with mutual murder attempts and had a murder/suicide as its midpoint!

Canon? Eh, sort of. Obviously, PMMM likes to skirt the line, but they definitely knew what they were doing. So, not officially confirmed canon, more of, "And they were roommates!"

2. Suletta Mercury/Miorine Rembran (Gundam: the Witch from Mercury)

You know a pairing is strong when it's the most recent one but also rocketed up to the number two spot.

Suletta and Miorine are opposites attracting in its purest form. The socially anxious and all loving country girl and the cold and cynical corporate heiress, these two are such fundamentally different people that if it weren't for the bizarre circumstances that brought them together, they probably wouldn't even be friends. But they were brought together, and as the grew to understand one another and got closer, both they and we found just how much they had in common, and how perfectly they complemented one another, with each of their strengths covering the other's weaknesses.

Canon? Absolutely. They're married, bitches! No further interpretation needed!

3. Shinji Ikari/Asuka Langley/Rei Ayanami (Neon Genesis Evangelion)

The one poly ship I am absolutely feral over, AsuShinRei (or the Israfel Special) are an example of a ship that cannot work in canon, would absolutely be a terrible idea in canon, but man, don't you wish you lived in the world where it would work? For as toxic, avoidant, and abusive these three are to each other, their respective traumas and personalities are such that if they could get just the slightest bit better and reach out to one another instead of pushing each other away, they would click so wonderfully well. Alas, it is not meant to be.

Canon? Lol, no.

4. Princess Entrapta/Hordak (She-Ra and the Princesses of Power)

I debated putting this one so high up over the heavy hitters that it sits atop upon, but at the end of the day, as a grumpy autistic introvert, these two just meant so much to me. It's like each represents different aspects of my personality, and watching them interact made me feel seen in a way I didn't even know I needed.

Canon? Kind of. At the very least, they're extremely close friends with a possibility for romance.

5. Luz Noceda/Amity Blight (The Owl House)

I had a real hard time choosing whether this or Catradora should take the number five spot, but while Catradora has that wonderful enemies to lovers with so much delicious angst, Lumity edges it out by being the rare pairing that got together at the midpoint, letting us actually see their relationship build and grow instead of ending on them getting together, and it was wonderful.

Canon? Absolutely.

6. Adora/Catra (She-Ra and the Princesses of Power)

But let's not take anything away from Catradora. I love enemies to lovers. It's that spice of conflict between two people that are at constant odds but also deeply understand one another better than their friends do that makes all the difference, and them being former best friends just pushes it over the edge. You can feel how much they care, no matter how often or how violently they fought, and Catra being pulled back from the brink and the two finally being honest with their feelings was so cathartic.

Canon? Hell yeah.

7. Nanoha Tamamachi/Fate Testarossa (Lyrical Nanoha)

An oldie but a goodie. Nanoha and Fate are probably my first real ship, and set the standard for many of my ships to come. Enemies to lovers, close personal relationship, battle couple, whole nine yards. And while it predates me truly getting into shipping, meaning I'm not as gaga over them as I am the others, you have got to respect those who paved the way.

Canon? Basically. I mean, the time period and culture prevented them from outright saying it, but come on.

8. Marisa Kirisame/Alice Margatroid (Touhou)

To be honest, I don't ship/ship these two like I do the others. More of, I read a lot of really touching doujins about these two when I was first getting into Touhou and I like their dynamic. But like NanoFate, you have to give it up to the OG's.

Canon? Nah.

And any other ships fall into "I liked them when I was a kid, but feel really weird talking about them as an adult" or "MC x Best Girl in a harem series, but does that really count?" or stuff that I like but don't feel strongly enough about them to include.

[gayuu-the-necromancer]

William Rex Affannato: Painfully ~ Normal Story

 ｡⋆｡˚🦋˚｡⋆｡

Kate: "William....!"

I followed William to his room.

Kate: "Are you really thinking of leaving this place on your own....?"

William: "Mmhm. There's no point in staying in the castle in this situation."

William answered as lightly as he could as if deciding what he would have for breakfast, while checking a letter he had just received.

Kate: "Then where are you going to go, under such circumstances?"

William: "There are several safe houses where Ethan and his team are based, so it could be any one of them."

Kate: "Wouldn't it be safer to stay here in the castle? The police can't get into her Majesty's private..."

William: "Not really."

William: "There must be police officers who have the spirit and sense of justice, who would negotiate directly with Her Majesty to judge evil."

William: "If Her Majesty refuses to do so, the royal family will bear the brunt of the criticism."

William: "Besides, it seems that the upper echelons of the police force and the Privy Council have been colluding for quite some time now."

William: "Anyways, I've got arrangements to make."

(That's....)

Kate: "How about finding out who in the Privy Council had that article written and have it corrected?"

Kate: "If you use your abilities, you can find out..."

William: "I can. But even poisons have a time when they should be effective."

William: "I don't think the Privy Council or Brian are oppressing anyone."

William: "They're just taking one bad guy's evil and putting it on another bad guy, which is me."

William: "There are not enough charges to convict."

(Ngh....)

I sensed that I was arrogant when William explained bluntly.

(To those who have tarnished his resolve by framing him for crimes that William has been judging....)

(Even though he knows)

(The people who wronged William are not evil to him)

I didn't understand it at all, but it made a lot of sense now.

Because that's the William Rex I've seen so far.

At the same time, a terrifying imagination is running through my mind.

Kate: ".....At this rate, even if you were to bear the burden of being a 'butterfly' and be judged by 'justice'..."

Kate: "Is this the worst possible end you were hoping for....?"

I am afraid to even ask that question and the back of my throat trembles.

William: "I don't know. As much as I'd like to see the most brutal destruction possible. I'm a little underwhelmed by the current situation."

William: "If they're going to drag me out and make me die the best death ever, I might as well live up to their expectations."

Next to William, who was smiling happily as if he was planning a trip.

Somehow I try to swallow his words.

William: "Don't look so worried. I won't let them come into this castle. We will not let them destroy the Crown."

Kate: "That's not what I'm worried about...."

William: "If the promised month has passed in my absence, Victor will let you go."

William: "You should have your report ready by then. I'm sure you can do a better job than Brian."

Kate: "I'm not worried about myself....!"

William finished checking the letter and had no other business in this room.

He walked slowly and soothingly toward me standing in the doorway.

Kate: "Not the Crown, not myself. I'm talking about you...."

Kate: "....I'm worried about you."

(I can't wait here thinking that you might meet a sad end somewhere)

Kate: "If William insists on leaving the castle all by himself...."

Kate: "....I'll follow you too."

William: "I don't think you're smart enough to know what it means to follow me here and now."

(If I follow him, I will be chased by the police too. Same as William)

It meant that I could no longer return to my daily life.

Instead of playing around with love 'like we do now', it meant that we would be offering our lives for the future.

Kate: "....I know."

William: "Hmm? You said you weren't sure whether to stay in the castle or go back to your daily routine, didn't you?"

Kate: "I was. But...."

I looked straight into William's red eyes to shake off my hesitation.

Kate: "If I forsake you here and now. I will surely regret it, I know that much for sure."

William: ".....You've really become beautiful."

William smiled like gentle, spring rain----

William: "But I can't take you with me."

(......Eh?)

He coldly shushed me with a wry smile.

Kate: "But why...?"

This is the first time he has explicitly rejected my will.

I feel as if I suddenly don't know who William is anymore and my head is in turmoil.

Kate: "Why can't you.....just tell me that I'm free to do whatever I like like you did when we went on our mission....?"

William: "Of course, I'd like to say that, you can do whatever you like...."

William: "But I can't let you cross this line."

Kate: "Why....!?"

William: "Because things will happen that I don't want."

(Things that he doesn't want to happen....)

-----FLASHBACK-----

William: "Of course, I have wishes, that I can't fulfill alone."

William: "If make my wishes come true, then one day something will happen that I don't want."

William: "So I'm choosing not to make it happen."

----FLASHBACK ENDS-----

(I don't know. My head is all messed up like it's all been turned upside down)

Kate: "I give up....if you wanted to see me in trouble, you've seen more than enough of that already.....?"

Kate: "What is is that you don't want? Tell me...."

William: "It will make you unhappy."

Kate: ".....Eh.....?"

The answer was so simple that it rolled into my hand.

Wiiliam: "You may want to be with me, but you won't want a tragic end. Unless you have a strong desire to do so."

William: "If you stay with me, you must accept my destiny and that will trouble, sadden, and distress you...as you work on your heart."

William: "Helplessness and guilt kill desire. It is a fetter that robs us of our freedom....You know this all too well."

(I do remember......the feeling of helplessness and inability to do anything in the face of a reality that is out of control)

William freed my heart, which had been crushed by these things.

William is someone who wants freedom above all else.

(But)

The more I wish to help him, the more I wish to be there for him....

-----FLASHBACK-----

(It's too painful to have to accept the tragic end of someone you love....)

I was almost caught again in the encumbrance of having to 'accept' my tragic end.

(That's why....?)

...........

Girl's voice: "Also! .....If I recognize your voice on the street, may I give you a flower?...........just one.........if you don't mind?"

William: ".....These words alone are more than enough for me."

............

Victor: "He doesn't ask anything in return. Even if you offer him your love, he won't take it."

-----FLASHBACK ENDS-----

(That's why....no matter how much love you give, you receive nothing in return?)

For William, to allow a 'special' person to love him is a very difficult thing.

Because it will also lead them to take the path of destruction and hence take away their freedom.

(So then, what is William's 'wish' that he is keeping it from being fulfilled?)

An unexpected answer is derived, and my mind goes blank. It is-----

To receive love from someone.

And to live with that special someone until the end.

Kate: ".....Wait....!"

Kate: "Indeed, it may not be possible right now...to accept your destiny without grieving."

Kate: "But one day....I might be able to live, with you, without being trapped by unacceptable guilt or the helplessness of not being able to change my fate."

Kate: "Won't you take a chance on that possibility.....?"

(Don't you ever think of wanting to live with me too?)

William: "Even if my doom happens to be tomorrow, then?"

Kate: ".......Nn."

William: "You're kind. Kind but stupid......Imagine this. You're standing on a cliff right now."

William: "If you take one step forward, you will be rolling down and hitting the ground."

William: "That's where you are right now."

William: "You now have the option to step back and indulge your desires on the edge of the cliff."

William: "But if you fall down, there is no going back up."

Kate: "Then...why....!"

(If you don't want to be loved, then why)

Kate: "Why did you expose my heart....?"

Kate: "You're the one who made me realize I was attracted to you...."

William: "I want you to be your own master, so that you may listen to your own heart."

William: "As a result, it didn't matter to me whether you love me or leave me."

William: "What you want is your business. I wanted to give you what you wanted as much as I could."

Kate: ".....The 'contradictions' are not always clear."

Kate: "If I am free to do what I want, even the wish to follow you, even to accept being unhappy.....!"

Kate: "It's all my free will....!"

William: "Kate."

William: "It is also my free will to not allow you to be trapped in another cripple. ....Isn't that right?"

Kate: ".....!!"

(....Why are you so selfish)

(Why are you so kind....)

William: "Kate. I don't want to use my power on you."

William's warm aura, finally vanished.

He was always in a good mood and smiling, but now he has a cold expression on his face, as if he is being forced to do something terribly unpleasant.

In order not to take away my freedom in the future, you take away my freedom now. The expression on his face, as if he is struggling with this contradiction, is the most beautiful expression I have ever seen------

It made me feel like we are the same people.

William: "So will you be quiet and back off?"

(I know what you're thinking. However....)

Kate: "....I don't want to."

(I won't back off)

(Because I love you)

Kate: "Has anyone ever said this before? Other people....besides me."

William: "....In the first place, there is no way for anyone other than the Crown to know my destiny."

William: "My sins, my destiny, I wouldn't let them know."

William: "But knowingly stepping in this far..."

William: "You're the first one."

William looked at me and smiled.

(.... No, I don't want to....!)

I closed my eyes to escape from the blood-red eyes.

I clung to his body to keep him from disappearing as I closed my eyes.

William: ".......Open your eyes, Kate."

Kate: "No...."

(Because if I open my eyes....)

(You'll go away)

William: ".....Kate."

Kate: "Ah....!?"

As if my body was floating, I felt a soft touch on my back.

I realized that he had pushed me down on the bed and when I struggled to get up, he held me tight.

Kate: "William....No...I....!"

William: ".........."

Kate: ".....William....?"

Suddenly, the silence that had come brought a crushing anxiety.

William: "Kate."

William: "You must never open your eyes."

(Eh....?)

The hand that had been stitched to his back was shaken off, and William's presence was far away.

The strength of the arms that held me, the warmth of the palms of my hands, all disappeared like an illusion and I-----

Kate: "....William!"

I opened my eyes.

William: "....You're a bad girl. I told you 'no'."

The look in his eyes, the one he always had, as he squints lovingly, burns strongly in my eyes.

William: " 'Don't move until that door opens for the 2nd time' "

The cruel command sounded warm and gentle.

Kate: "Wait..."

(I can't....move my body...!)

As if I was crucified, I couldn't move a single finger.

William: "So long, poor robin."

William: "I wish you all the happiness in the world ahead of you."

At the edge of my vision, I saw him leaving.

Kate: "I don't want that wish. Wait...William, don't go....!!"

I heard the sound of footsteps moving away, and the door opening and closing.

The only thing that still lingered in the room, was the smell of roses.

It gently enveloped me like a nightmare I could not wake up from.

Chapter 15

[kyriolex]

Lord it cannot be understated how much I absolutely CANNOT STAND Shikamaru!

He's the fucking Hokage and yet instead of trying to help protect the village himself, he sent out children (including Himawari, a 12-13 year old GENIN) to fight Ten-Tails level threats all while he sits on his ass hiding in the Hokage's office.

Like Okay even he if didn't know about the Shinjus at the time, there is still the fact that as soon as Jura and Hidari arrived in the village, everyone thought one of the enemies was SASUKE

Everyone INCLUDING Shikamaru know precisely damn well just how powerful Sasuke is.

Sasuke by himself is literally an S-Class Ninja and any mission against him is automatically an S-Rank mission

Yet this pineapple head moron thought it would be a good idea to let new Team 10 and Himawari go confront him?

Say what you will about Naruto and Tsunade. They weren't perfect but GODDAMN they never let Genin go on missions that they knew damn well was beyond their ranks/capacity

AND neither Naruto or Tsunade would just SIT BY IDLY while there are S-Rank Threats in the village. They got out there and actually joined the fight!

Even HIRUZEN, as shitty as he was, literally joined the fight when Orochimaru invaded the village

Maybe I could give him a bit more leeway for sending New Shika-Ino-Cho out there since they are the same age/rank as their parents were in Shippuden

But HIMAWARI? That's like the equivalent of sending Genin Konohamaru to the 4th Shinobi War

WTF is Shikamaru even doing? Get this man out of the Hokage seat

I'm going to play devil's advocate here, not because I like Shikamaru, but because work today put me in a mood. I'm going to argue that in a rare change of pace for Boruto-era Shikamaru, he is behaving somewhat competently right now.

Because here's the thing: while these events have unfolded for us over the course of several months, from Shikamaru's perspective, it's been 5 minutes at most.

In a short summary of Shikamaru's actions so far:

Jura and Hidari approach the village and immediately set off the sensory unit's telepathic alarms.

Shikamaru hears the name "Sasuke" and immediately gives orders to evacuate civilians.

Every known ninja in the village converges on the Ten Tails. It's unclear if Shikamaru gave orders, if this is protocol, or if Sasuke's chakra just acts as a psychic magnet urging everyone nearby to fight him.

Jura attacks Team 10, and they fight him off. The Sensory Unit doesn't manage to page Shikadai in to his dad until a pause in the fight.

Shikamaru orders all hands to support Team 10. He also tells Boruto and Kawaki to stop fighting and go save their sister.

So basically, Shikamaru's been getting a feed of updates and immediately responding with escalating orders to his troops. He literally hasn't had time to leave his seat yet.

Although let's be honest: Shikamaru has been doing a desk job for two decades. His shadow jutsu can't restrain people who are exponentially more powerful than him. If he tried to fight Sasuke, even a tree-based knockoff of Sasuke, he would be turned into juice on the pavement.

That said, with the benefit of a reader's perspective, I would say Shikamaru has still made two significant tactical errors.

The first was not trying to set up communication with the Ten Tails to ask what the hell they want. Even if passing on telepathic messages through your subordinates is awkward, he could at least stall for time until Boruto gets there. (Although it's possible Shikamaru will try this next chapter.).

The second mistake was leaving Mr. Goatee here on payroll. He's the guy who was on guard duty when Kawaki and Boruto snuck out of the house. If he'd been alert enough to catch two teenagers sneaking out past curfew, he could have prevented the whole Momoshiki SNAFU and the chain of events that led up to this point.

WHY IS THIS MAN GROUPED WITH KONOHAMARU AND THE OTHER COMPETENT JONIN IN THE FIRST RESPONDER SQUAD??? Shikamaru needs to pick his people better. I am more frustrated about Mr. Goatee's presence than nearly anything else in this chapter.

[lassiekitsune]

Loki Laufeyson x reader «Morning hugs»

GIF isn't mine

Description: When you woke up in the morning, you don't find Loki next to you. But you find something that reminds you of the first date with your loved one.

Warnings: Fluff, flashbacks, and a bit of lame dialogue at the end

Author: The idea for this story came to me through my morning today and my good imagination. I'm so sorry that I haven't published new posts for so long time, I hope you like this fic!

The fist rays of the morning sun reflected on the wall in your room. You opened your eyes and stretched out in the warm bad. Despite the fact that it was spring outside, you didn't want to get up from your comfortable place at all. As usual, you turned over to the other side to find yourself in your boyfriend's arms and sleep some more. But you were met by emptiness, his place was cold.

– Loki? – you called him. As expected, you didn't receive an answer. You weren't suprised, it wasn't the first time Loki woke up before you and went about his business. You didn't want to sleep anymore without your lover, so you got up and went to the kitchen. After making your favourite drink, you poured it into a cup and went onto the balcony. You had a beautiful view, since the hight building where you live is bordered by private houses. People were in a hurry, some to work, and some to their own affairs. The noise of cars alternated with birdsong, a perfect moment of peace. There was a small river near to near to your hight-rise building. Shifting your gaze to it, you saw a pair of swans swimming in search of their breakfast. Watching them, you remembered the moment of your first romantic date with Loki...

~Memories~

You and Loki were walking in the park. Since it was your first date, you were a little a little nervous. Loki was trying not to let the tense awkwardness between you and him ruin that he had been working towards for years. Finally, he invited you to feed the beautiful swans on the lake, you agreed. Smiling, Loki pulled a handful of wheat from his pocket (don't ask me how it got there, ok? 😂👍). Swans flocked to you, wanting to taste the the offered treats. But when you tried to come closer, the birds hissed at you threateningly

– Loki, they won't attack me, will they? – you asked

– They can, don't get too close to them, and just trust me – Loki took some wheat and threw them into the water. A beautiful black swan floated out of the trick reeds, followed by a white swan.

–They look like us, right? – Loki asked, you nodded your head. He didn't lie, swans choose only one lover for their whole life. Your love is similar, neither of you could imagine life without each other. That was when Loki and kissed for the first time.

~End of memories~

Memories flooded your mind, which why you didn't hear the balcony door open. You were brought back to reality by two strong arms hugging you and someone put their chin on your head. You didn't have to turn your head to find to find out who it was.

– Good morning, love. Why are you awake at such an early hour? – Loki asked

– I can't sleep without you – you confessed – What about you? Where have you been? – at that, the God of mischief only snickered instead of answering, and buried his face in your H/C hair that shone in the sun. A few seconds later you heard him grunt in displeasure

– Thor... – after that words were not needed. His older brother has always been a bit problem for your lover. Because of Thor's charismatic nature, almost everyone forgot about Loki's existence. For comfort, you took Loki's hand and kissed it. Your God took his head out from under your hair and looked at you in wonder. You didn't see it, you FELT it. Then, to confirm your love, you rubbed against his hand like a cat rubs against its master's legs. Loki didn't move for several minutes, shocked by your actions. You were already starting to feel excited, but the next thing you felt was being turned to the other side and being kissed on the lips.

– I love you, Loki – you said breaking the kiss.

– How much do you love me? – Loki asked, you through a little

– I love you like the number of stars in the night sky!

– Really? Then you will have to learn to love the way I love you for a long time

– And how much do you love me then? – you decided to play his game

– You can count the stars in the sky, and my love for you is like infinity!

– Loki! – you pretended to be offended by this «good» joke. But, looking into his eyes, you were embarrassed.

– So, what does the world «infinity» mean in your understanding? – at your question, Loki smiled and hugged you

[pretensesoup]

Queer books, day 13/30

All right, ready to dive back into the seedy world of M/M romance novels after yesterday's unnecessarily heartfelt diversion?

This book is like...James Bond meets and shags a Jewish Oscar Wilde. Also there's some plot about blackmail. It's set in the middle of the belle époque, so right around 1900, at a time when many noble families suddenly realized that they weren't quite as wealthy as they once had been but were still saddled with large country houses, trendy London homes, big payrolls, etc. (This is also the plot of Downton Abbey.)

Anyway, one thing I enjoy about KJ Charles is that she writes Jewish characters into her stuff. The first one I came across, in Band Sinister, was only a side character, but...I had this sudden revelation that I didn't really ever see Jews represented in fiction that wasn't set around WWII. In the same way one could get the sense that there are no queer people before Stonewall except for Walt Whitman and Oscar Wilde, it's weirdly easy to get the feeling that Jews only really existed from about 1929 to 1946. (And in the works of Michael Chabon and the film The Big Lebowski, which is the best film ever.)

Daniel da Silva is the Jewish character here--yes, he's Sephardic, which is both accurate for migration patterns (England got a bunch of Jews following the Spanish Inquisition) and unusual in itself, as Jews seem to be primarily northern European when portrayed in fiction. He's a poet and a spy, brilliant and mercurial, not much of a fighter but very good at what he does. He meets a guy named Captain Archie Curtis, who is a war vet who lost several fingers to a poorly manufactured gun. They solve a crime (and do sex--did I mention that? a lot of sex).

This is a sendup of Victorian/Edwardian novels like She by H. Rider Haggard--explicitly, Captain Curtis is like the nephew/adopted son of Sir Henry Curtis and his "friend"(?) Captain Good, who are characters in King Solomon's Mines. And it has a lot of tropes, if you are a trope-reading person. We get: big gay awakening, sex or death, arguably a kind of grumpy/sunshine thing, attack lesbians as background characters, and a whole last stand/never tell me the odds type of thing. Also, da Silva comes back in the Will Darling books as an older and wiser man, and I wish we'd gotten more of him.

I read this book last summer during a period of about 54 hours when we didn't have electricity. I should have been saving the power in my phone, but instead I was reading this. Eventually, I took the kids to their grandmother's house (because it was July and 90 degrees, and SHE had power) and finished reading this in her air conditioned guest room. No regrets. 10/10, go read it.

[krikeymate]

Okay so this is kinda gonna be long and a bit of a ramble, so apologies in advance.

One thing I never understood was the idea that Amber truly cared about Tara, in scream 5 we know that the plan is for her to attack Tara which would then lead to Sam going back to Woodsboro so that Ritchie can have his ending.

However my confusion stems from how much Amber hurts Tara, she stabs her several times and breaks her leg (brutally might I add, like yikes!) Plus when Tara gets stabbed through the hand that knife is aiming straight for her chest in what could've been a killing blow ( I say 'could've' because we've seen Chad get absolutely carved up but still survive somehow so y'know movie logic).

If she really cared about Tara the attack didn't necessarily have to go that far, just enough for Tara to report the fact that there's a new Ghostface killer on the loose, leading to Wes calling Sam and so on so forth. Plus Amber had no problem trying to kill her her other childhood friends of which she did succeed (RIP Liv, Chad may have forgotten you but I didn't lol) so who knows.

The idea that maybe Amber was spiting Sam could make sense in a way, her being the one to 'care' about Tara because Sam left but to me that seems more controlling/possessive than caring. Especially if you take into account how quickly Sam & Tara reconnect after everything that must've added to her anger at Sam.

I wonder what your take on this is?

Hopefully this makes some semblance of sense and I apologise if it doesn't. ♤

Agreed! I find it very hard to believe Amber cared about Tara... or anyone else, at all. I think her motives for everything she does are incredibly self-serving. It's why when I write her I try to stick to the characterisation that her interest in Tara is only so far as having an adoring fan, so to speak. I think she likes being the center of Tara's world, that she's hers like a pet is yours.

Sam is a threat because Tara loves her more than Amber, which is obviously something she can't abide by. So it's fair to say that Amber has animosity for Sam, and we do see some of that in the movie, however it outright tells us Amber's motive - to make a good movie. Tara was just collateral damage for that. Amber will get the Jill treatment for surviving a Ghostface attack anyway.

A lot of people think that it was intended for Tara to survive her initial attack, I disagree. It was incredibly brutal, she was stabbed seven times and had her leg broken. You can bring up that she survived four rounds with Amber, I would bring up that Amber and Richie's plans went off the rails the moment Tara didn't die, and they were then struggling to get it back on track. The plans for Tara changed once they got her and Sam to the house, and that's why Amber ties her up instead of outright killing her. The fourth round, she throws this invalid over the couch and storms off because she's angry and trying to regain control of the situation. She believes she's knocked Tara out, and... I'm pretty sure she did. Tara's hardly a threat at that point, Amber even overpowered her pretty quickly once she got over the shock of being clotheslined by a crutch.

But of course, on fandom side, I've a lot of love for Amber, she was a beautiful unhinged woman. And shipping is just part of the fun and can make it angsty and who doesn't want their resident terrible person character to see some sort of redemption? Part of it I think is that Amber was a sadly underdeveloped character (weren't they all lol), but she was a really interesting one, so people want to see more of her, and that involves fleshing her out and giving her more interesting motives.