#And enjoy my unfinished skk

[nopeleavemealoone]

Ahhhhh christmas sojkoku but im posting not on christmas because i never finished 🫠 oh well

[oddlylongtelephonecord]

I wanna dump my list of skk fic recs so I have a list of all my favorite ones and I can finally close out of some of my 30 ao3 tabs.

1. (I’m sure you all saw this one coming so I’m going to get it out of the way first) I will admit, I didn’t love the last chapter or two. But the rest of this is an absolute masterpiece. It’s one of the best characterizations of skk I’ve seen in these really popular fics.

2. Kyoka pov, ft. chuuya’s breakdown after dazai left. It’s been a while since I read it, but I didn’t keep it open in a tab for over a year for no reason.

3. This is by far my favorite one tbh. Dazai and Chuuya at 15, 16, 17, and 18, and how they grew into and out of each other. It crushed my soul. Let it crush yours too.

4. I’ll be so honest it’s need forever since I read this one BUT I remember it being one that felt like it changed the trajectory of my life and flipped my worldview upside down. Like maybe I’m being dramatic, but again, there’s a reason I refused to close the tab.

5. this one easily ties with 3 for my favorite actually. Shows every time Chuuya uses corruption and how Dazai handles Chuuya’s near-death experiences (spoiler alert: dazai doesn’t take it well)

6. this is the only unfinished one on here I think, but it’s pretty much exactly what it says in the title. Follows Dazai and Chuuya as they try to deal with the fact that Dazai does in fact feel emotions

7. By the same author as above, outsider pov fic (kunikida) dazai has a minor breakdown + dazai and chuuya arguing in french, this one is also unfinished but it doesn’t end on a cliffhanger so that’s nice

I’ll def keep adding to this as I find new fics that I enjoy enough to save (a very rare occurrence, my standards are about as far from low as you can get. It’s kind of obnoxious, but you know what they say, c’est la vie)

[bunglegaydogs]

skk dynamics!

I just want to talk about Soukoku so that is precisely what I'm going to do ^^

As per, this post has no specific or planned direction, I'm just gonna see where it takes me lol.

It genuinely irks me to see the rampant mischaracterisation within the fandom pertaining to not only just Soukoku, but several other characters as well. Ranpo, Akutagawa, Kunikida, etc. It might just be my dumb little screaming brain being scared of something that's not supposed to be in my head, or hell, something that's in the BACK of my mind, and I know that makes no sense but it does to me xoxo

I just really treasure the dynamic between Dazai and Chuuya and I get frightened that when I think somebody is mischaracterising them, I'm the only one that thinks that and that I'm just perceiving them wrong. Which genuinely is the one thing I never wish to do; when I write fics, my number one goal is to make the characters as true to life as possible. I try my damndest to do justice to their characters, and based off of the lovely people that read it and comment, I'm doing something right, surprisingly.

The characterisation of Dazai and Chuuya specifically is something so important to me because I relate to the both of them the most out of any of my interests. And I have a LOT of interests.

I don't know why or how, but they came to be my absolute favourite characters over all other fandoms and shows and games and films I enjoyed. (I'm excluding the Marauders fandom here, because I also love Remus and Sirius exactly like this). I piss myself off with it sometimes, because I accidentally base all of my creative outlets off of Soukoku, and lo and behold, I have about 30 unfinished ideas/fics after one night of ruminating over these motherfuckers.

Anyways. Like I said, this post has no point, it's just my incoherent, incessant rambling that if I don't write down, will slowly eat away at me until I die ^^

So, I guess, without further ado, I'm just gonna get going?

LMAO

Anyways,

Soukoku's dynamic has always been interesting. We were introduced to them first (as a pair) as enemies; ex-partners, rivals, loathing each other. But, when we slowly got to see more of their relationship, more of their past, more of their dynamic, quite a lot of us slowly came to realise; oh shit. There's more to them here.

The two of these together aren't just black-and-white characters. Dazai is not inherently good just because he works for the ADA. Chuuya is not inherently bad just because he works for the PM. They are morally grey characters. They've killed people, tortured people, stolen, beaten, attacked, hurt, all that good stuff that comes with being in the Mafia (nevermind fucking Mafia executives). Something that a lot of people seem to forget is where to draw the line between these two organisations; if the ADA is harbouring two fugitives that are ex-mafia, one of them being an executive, another fugitive that terrorised the streets of Japan as a man-eating tiger, and is run by an ex-assassin who was close with the current leader of the Port Mafia, who's to say that they're the good guys? Who is the one to define the evil and the light?

Nobody.

There are no sides.

The Port Mafia aren't the bad guys, and the Agency aren't the good guys. They're both doing their morally grey jobs with their morally grey cast of characters.

Yes, on a base level, the ADA are supposed to be the good guys, whereas the Mafia are the bad. It's a narrow-minded way of thinking and looking at the series, but on a surface level, yes, that seems to be the case.

However, we have layers to this. We know how morally grey these characters are, good or bad. Take Tanizaki, for example, and his way of going about it when Naomi is threatened. He knows he's morally grey. He knows he's not one of the good guys. None of them are! They save people, and that makes them good. But it doesn't make them the good guys. I'm not calling them bad people, of course not. I'm just saying, in the wise words of a post I once read months back, 'Maturing is realising that neither the Port Mafia or the ADA are the good or bad guys'. Something along those lines.

ANYWAYS, I've written this much already and still haven't spoken about SKK.

My point here was their good apple/bad apple dynamic. Dazai is from the same place Chuuya is at, the Mafia. So, by calling Dazai a 'bad guy' you're indirectly also calling Chuuya a bad guy. You're calling Hirotsu a bad guy. You're calling Akutagawa a bad guy. You're calling Higuchi a bad guy. You're calling all of these Mafia members the bad guys; when that's not strictly true. Morally grey characters, yet not monsters. Not bloodthirsty, demonic, evil motherfuckers. They're in the Mafia; not a good start, of course. But again, this does not make them bad people. Actions don't define the person you make yourself out to be, if that makes any sense. Just because a bad person did one good thing one time does not necessarily make them a good person. But if they strive to become a better one by constantly doing good and making active efforts to change their ways, then they're well on their way to earning that title, or coming close to it. Just because someone good did a bad thing one time does not automatically make them a bad person. They're not awful for making one bad choice, depending on the severity and their actions after the choice. Because it can go both ways; strive to be a better person, or fall to be a bad one.

ANYWAYS.

SOUKOKU.

I LOVE SOUKOKU.

So, I'm actually going to talk about them instead of fucking RABITTING ON FOR HOWEVER LONG.

Anyways.

Soukoku is special to me. I relate to the both of them the most. I recognise the flaws in each of them, and I recognise the good. I recognise the changes they're willing to put themselves through for the sake of the greater good, and I recognise the struggles they've been through to get there. I see myself in them, and so I can't help but latch onto them and want to keep them for myself. My subconscious wants to protect them and make them happy and becomes unhealthily attached to these fictional characters.

Anyways.

Soukoku dynamics. Right.

One of my favourite dynamics about Soukoku is the childlike behaviour they exhibit with one another. Even after seven years and they still bicker like they did at 15. I've said it a thousand times before and I'll fucking say it again; they let each other be the children that they never got to be. They let loose with one another. They unwind. They relax. They recognise their similarities (much to Chuuya's chagrin and unwavering denial) and each other's differences. Where there is hate, there is love and trust. It's buried deep. But it's there. The two of them have their walls put high up. They guard themselves well. They keep their shit inside. They let not another soul see what goes on in their hearts. So, with their crying children stuck inside of them and locked down, they let them out around each other. By simply being with each other at any given moment, they're healing their inner children, and allowing them to breathe.

Each moment with Soukoku is so delicate. It feels intrusive to watch their intimate scenes. It feels like such a beautiful moment, so precious to watch and so delicate to touch. The intimate scenes with the two of these are either emotionally charged, blazing, action-packed and full of chaos, or quiet and serene. Tranquil. It's never really neutral ground for them. It's either chaos or serenity, just a calm moment between the two of them, away from the rest of the world and taking (unknowing) comfort in each other's presence.

It's the small smiles from Dazai when Chuuya isn't looking. It's the words and actions with hidden meanings exchanged between them. It's the concern when one of them gets hurt, or is stuck in an unprecedented situation. It's the unfaltering trust and loyalty between each other that pushes them forward, even if it kills them, or seems fruitless. It's the determination that sits in the both of them to protect those that they care about, and put the world above all else for just a moment.

Small, knowing glances. Inside jokes. Petulant, playful bickering. Concerned thoughts. Constant thoughts.

I find it hard to believe that nobody else finds Dazai and Chuuya suspicious; they're hardly discreet about how much they think about each other. Example number one:

Chuuya is drunk with Hirotsu and Kajii. On a whim, he decides to go on a rant about Dazai. Hirotsu and Kajii are apparently sick of it; he does this a lot. He decides, impulsively, to ring Dazai's phone. Dazai picks up the fucking phone. Hirotsu answers, Dazai's like 'Oh, hey, yeah this is my old phone.' Blatantly lies to the motherfucker, because Dazai, honey, you're at home reading; what have you got your old phone from seven years ago next to you, working, and on for? Chuuya wants to speak with him. Gets angry when he can't talk to him to shout at him and complain. Keeps trying to call him back in anger.

Now, if I do say so myself, that's pretty suspicious of them.

Example two:

Dazai in fucking general. He does not shut the fuck up about Chuuya. He tells everyone he meets about how much he spends thinking about Chuuya (everyone except the Agency ahem). He's fucking gay.

That also brings me on to another point. Dazai rarely speaks about Chuuya with the ADA; I'm not too sure I've ever seen him say anything about him to them, except in Wan and the like. (I'm dumb tho tbf). However, upon Yosano figuring out Chuuya's identity, his first reaction is "Goddamn it, Dazai told them". Not that he's a widely known gravity manipulator and its not fucking hard to figure it out, plus the fact that he's a Mafia executive, PLUS the fact that they're a detective Agency? His first impulse is to blame Dazai lmao. Anyways.

You can ignore the first half of that paragraph I was just chatting mad wham.

Anyways.

I just enjoy how peaceful and serene the intimate moments between Soukoku can be. Even the world around them is falling apart, it still somehow feels so beautiful, real, raw, and personal. When Dazai is watching Chuuya fight in storm bringer, it feels so quiet. All hell is breaking loose, yet Dazai is so breathtaken by Chuuya that we feel as if we're interrupting. I don't know why but all I picture upon imagining that scene is a very quiet scene, just for a few seconds, of no music or anything, and white. Just the colour white in as many places as possible. A softness to the screen. I don't know. It just feels like that to me and I can't explain it.

Soukoku's dynamics are so important, because when people mischaracterise both Dazai and Chuuya and then smush that together it creates an abomination of what was supposed to be beautiful and ruins the relationship they really have, muddying their name. Their relationship is special. It's so much more than hate.

Hate is also a crucial part of their relationship, however. And a lot of us Soukoku shippers tend to forget that. We're so blinded by how much we want them to admire and adore each other that we forget how much they do despise one another. And I've mentioned this before in another post.

Their hate is real. It's not a ruse, it's the real deal. They genuinely do hate one another; but that hate is filled with so much more than downright disgust. That hate is filled with the trust of their bond, seven years of partnership, love, and so many unspoken things between the two of them.

Chuuya hates Dazai because he hates himself. He refuses to let himself see the similarities between him and Dazai, because he could never be like him. Chuuya often struggles with his identity and who he is and just how human he is. He didn't know until he was 16 whether he was a real human or not. And so, upon meeting this other human at 15 who craves death and wants to just throw away this human life that he's been given? That's a hard no for Chuuya. He resents Dazai for being so willing to give up his life so carelessly, so easily. He'd do anything at that point to realise just how human he was, to prove his humanity to others and to show his compassion and human qualities. And he stumbles across this stone-cold, suicidal kid who wants to let go of all of that, sees no point in trying to even be human, and who is lacking empathy for other human lives. Chuuya disgusts and loathes that. So, he wants nothing to do with him. Does not want to be attached to him in any way shape or form. Refuses to acknowledge their similarities. So, when he's being tortured, and the first thing he hallucinates is Dazai? It preys on his insecurities and deepest fears. He fears that he's not at all a human, and he fears that he is like Dazai, an unfeeling, indifferent, seemingly heartless boy who wishes to give up on the world, who wishes he was never born, who wishes nothing more than to be granted that sweet release of death.

I can't articulate very well, so for that I do apologise! But yeah, this has always been an important scene for me. In his moment of weakness, Chuuya hallucinated the person that he wanted to see the least, first. He hallucinated Dazai before his freshly dead friends, etc. And claims that, whilst he's being tortured, after Verlaine has killed the people closest to him, that he hates him the most out of anyone in the world. A lot of people said that this was an overreaction; respectfully, shut the fuck up ^^ My boy was being tortured, give him some leeway, yeah?

Anyway.

It just goes to show how deep those roots of self-hatred go within Chuuya; it seems him and Dazai have something more in common than originally thought.

Now, I don't actually have a complete grasp on the reason why Dazai hates Chuuya so much. Because, he doesn't hate him as much as Chuuya hates him, or as much as he makes it out to be. Dazai is an eccentric bastard, dramatising things for the sake of stirring up trouble. He overexaggerates for a variety of reasons, one of those being to conceal any emotion he IS feeling. He makes a big song and dance out of the little things to try and forget about the big things. To not think. Dazai is not numb by nature. He's numb by conditioning. He has conditioned himself to feel nothing, to be cold and logical and rational. Mori, of course, only exemplified these traits, making him colder and more calculated than ever/before. So, my blind guess is that he holds a sort of resentment to Chuuya for being able to be more normal than he is, for wanting to live and not seeing the world as a boring, pointless place. But, he also wants Chuuya to thrive as a human, to be able to live his life knowing and being sure of his humanity. And, when it's only him and Verlaine, he grows quite... emotional (trust me, it's not a lot but that's the only word I can think of) when talking about his humanity. That, Chuuya has to be a human. Because how could he hate someone so much? He has to be a human, because if he wasn't he would like Dazai more.

I think Dazais "issue" (I CAN'T THINK OF WORDS RIGHT NOW LMAO) is that he just wants Chuuya to like him. Maybe he wants a friend. Maybe there's something else to it. But, Dazai has always had strong... feelings, towards Chuuya. "Jokingly" telling him he loves him. Getting awfully close when he doesn't need to, and never does with anyone else. Yeah, you're not fooling anybody hun. Makes many romantic comments that could be passed off as something else entirely about him. Showing active concern for him. Caring for him. Thinking about him. He shows a lot more attention to Chuuya than he gets in return; by that I mean speaks about it more. Is a lot more verbal than Chuuya is.

GAHHHH sorry sorry I just have too much to say and don't know when to SHUT THE FUCK UP but I have SO MUCH more to say, but I'm going to be going off and writing my shitty little fics that should've been written yonks ago <3

have a lovely day/night! ^^

[aiguan]

New Year Special

Happy Late New Year! For the arrival of 2024 here's a little spoiler/extra to my SKK Actors AU! Could be read without much context! Think of this as an alternative ending to my fic that was still unfinished. I'm delusional.

Dazai stared at the peeling ceiling while slumping on the waiting room's leather couch. His foot was subconsciously tapping in rhythm as a figure finally walked into the room. It was the woman the show assigned to interview him.

The questions were typical, and Dazai, as normal, responded with the utter bare minimum answer. He hated interviews. He did not understand why such mind-numbing activities were apparently made for him when he could have been doing much more productive work.

But Dazai couldn't cut the conversations short or just escape the interview, unlike how he usually does with skill. Because this was a live show.

"So, Mr Dazai, can you fill us in about your love life?" Asked the interviewer, grinning.

Dazai held back the urge to roll his eyes (Not this question again) before plastering his smile. "It's just like how people see it?"

"Come on Mr Dazai, we can all see it. Your type, I mean. But is there a deeper meaning to how you, well, date? Just after you turned 18, you've dated more than 20 girls."

Dazai smiled, and the woman continued.

"A few people noticed that the people you dated all had red hair and blue eyes. Is there a reason for that?"

That should be the last question. Dazai sighed. "Just a coincidence, I guess."

Through a laptop screen, Chuuya watched the live. A wine glass at the tip of his mouth, the red liquid slipping into his mouth. His face was red, and he slammed the laptop shut.

Counting back, it has been 4 years since Dazai left. Chuuya ruffled his hair but quickly stopped. Maybe it's a good idea to dye his hair and start wearing coloured lenses.

It was a terrible day. Dazai walked down the streets, the wind berated him the entire way from the recording studio to his apartment. You would think Oscar-level movie star Dazai Osamu would have at least a private driver, and yes he does have one, but once in a while, walking unarmed may seem a good idea. Just in case someone that he actually wants to be attacked by would attack him. But with not even a bodyguard with him, all he received was fans taking selfies and autographs. No wanted attacker.

Incoming call from Slug...

Dazai went into a café and answered the call. It being 8:01 pm, the café seemed almost deserted.

"Hello?"

"Mackerel."

"What was the call for?"

"I watched your live."

"Cool." Not cool at all.

"Where are you? I'll pick you up."

"Chuuya, you're drunk."

"Where are you?" Chuuya remained stubborn.

Dazai looked at the logo on the menu. Oh, it's this café. He managed to enter the most expensive café of Japan. That's why it's so uncrowded.

"Your favourite café."

"What makes you think my preference didn't change?"

"I'm your partner."

Chuuya looked up from his seat. In front of him was the bandaged brunette he once worked with.

"Hello, partner." Dazai hung up.

Chuuya blinked. "Partner? You left for 4 years." He rubbed his forehead, he knew he was intoxicated. That was what gave him the courage to press "Mackerel" on his phone. The number he failed to delete after 4 fucking years.

"I'm here now, right?"

"After 4 years?"

"Better than never."

Dazai sipped from the glass of wine. It's a Petrus, each sip dripping with wealth.

"You want me to drop you home?" Asked Dazai.

I hope you enjoyed this extra part! If you enjoyed this, the link to my fic is here:

Hope you guys have a wonderful 2024, and sorry for the lack of activity, I'm gonna be online a lot more now.

:)

[theroadtosomewhere]

Writer Interview Game!

Tagged by @azapofinspiration yippeeeeeeee

When did you start writing?

Mmmmm.... first story I wrote properly was in 2014, little primary school lad who got marked well on a story in class and it ended up on a lil notice board which little me was like oH. It was a 10 year old's excuse for a horror story but it does make me laugh to think that I went from that to wattpad within months, back when it wasnt behind a paywall. My first original was on wattpad in maybe 2016 and after that I was really into LoZ and BBC Sherlock so there was some fanfics there. My longest (unfinished) original story was built off a plot that I created for a LoZ fanfic and I was still very active in writing it up until three years ago, so there was a solid 6-7 years spent with that lol.

End of 2022 I started reading abt skk on ao3 without ever having watched the show (shoutout athena and moxie p sure i read some of yours first lmfao every skker ever) and started writing my first few skk fics without ever having watched the show OR read the manga. Before that though the thing that got me onto writing for/on ao3 was Narumitsu!!! my babes one day i will finish that first fic (blackmadhi yesssssssss if you wanna see my cringe from pre bsd thats it lol).

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

god..... too many..... its been a long time since ive sat down to read properly, and even during school i would not have considered myself a book nerd by any means (mostly because i was juggling time between school and extra-curriculars.)

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

When I was in highschool, my writing style (based on the original mentioned above) was compared to Marcus Zusac before I'd even read a book of his. That was pretty nice. Same with Neil Gaiman but that is too high praise for me to accept considering i now write either about gay lawyers or gay mafioso x ex-mafioso soooooooooooo. not sure any of that would come through in my writing these days.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

Literally write wherever I can. In my room, at my desk, on the bus or train, during breaks at work and in class at uni (responsible i know). Wind, rain or shine, if i have an idea (or not even) i'll jot down an idea or vaguely edit something. The process is process-ing!!!!

What’s your most effective way to muster up a muse?

Hehehehehehehe......maladaptive daydreaming..........

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

I LOVE THIS OKAY. SO. typical projection stuff incoming. I feel like most if not everyone has a highschool horror story and up until like a year or so ago i was like!!! it wasnt that bad!!!! (it was, emotionally at least). The aforementioned original story and its characters changed a LOT overtime lol. when I hit my last year of highschool, i'd had some time away from writing and when i read over it, it was crazy to see not only what my mental state had been through my writing, but to see my own coping mechanisms written between the lines before i even knew what they were/that i did them! Won't go into too much detail about that but I did experience dissociation and anxiety etc which I only began to address in my last year of school, so going back and reading it with a clearer head was like wow okay. that was real!

That being said! Hurt/comfort my beloved. The unloved being loved. Second chances. Do with that what you will.

What is your reason for writing?

Initially i started writing for fun, but during highschool as things got a little worse, i fell into the characters i created and i can look back now fondly and think...thank you. i still dont know if i want to touch the story because its one of the last things i have left from a time past that may not have been positive, but the experience of writing and developing the characters alongside myself back then is just sighs :') sometimes i miss that girl.

First for enjoyment, second as a way of staying sane, and now i'd say its a mixture of both. My writing is my love letter to whatever I'm writing about. I do love sharing too. Right audience and all that :)

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I've been told that I can write particular characters' inner voices quite well, which is always a compliment :')

I think my own strength as a writer is also the weakness, which is to say that a project is never finished. Even when there's something out there and up on the interwebs for people to see, there's a good chance that if you check back months later, something has been edited or changed. I do have issues with perfectionism at times, but weirdly enough its not a negative thing when i apply it to my writing. I enjoy the process of seeing the stories i write change.

How do you feel about your own writing?

Good most days. I experiment quite a bit with ideas and writing styles/formatting so I will leave it at that lol.

Tagging @calmlb and @samtheboyfailure if y'all want :)

[giovanni-solos]

My solution to absolutely everything that troubles me late at night is to yell to the rooftops about whatever has my interest, be it yapping off in my brain or reaching out to my bros. But tonight I decided “here we go I’m giving up my wack ass AU to Tumblr” as my coping skill.

It’s an age swap au mostly centered around DazAtsu (this is your cue to leave if your not here for that) and the 18 Dazai navigating through grief and life in the agency, along side his strange growing feelings towards Atsushi that he just can’t seem to name. the way I see it is that since him and Atsushi have swapped ages, it’s either his past would have taken place much earlier or he would have just skipped the years in hiding and gone straight to the other side like Oda had wished of him.

I���ve actually had two fanfictions written for it so far that have almost NOTHING to do with adjusting to his life because of inconsistency but I will still post the first one as well as the second one hoping I didn’t just copy paste the same exact link twice. Funny story I actually came up with this thanks to taking part in the 2023 DazAtsu week over on twitter before I deleted the app and account, it came with a art piece I’ve featured previously on here, those are (kind of) their designs but those aren’t the updated ones. God now that I’m thinking about it I’ve been cooking this up for MONTHS and haven’t said or done much of anything on it publicly.

Actually while I’m on my tangent here is the doodles, showcasing them mostly

The next one is an unfinished piece I made for them

I leave a lot of things unfinished in terms of both art and writing. But, without further adeiu here’s some little facts I managed to keep bouncing in my pinball machine of a brain:

• Dazai had been in contact with Ranpo after Oda’s death and received an offer to become a detective. While waiting by the iconic river for who he thought was Ranpo intrusive thoughts struck him and he jumped into the water. Atsushi fished him out and gave him his coat.

• he’s been stealing that damn huge coat any chance he gets ever since

• Dazai had one of Oda’s shirts, it became a source of comfort after his friend’s death to the point he just hardly took it off.

• Atsushi’s attire, though hardly professional is actually acceptable considering what his ability does to clothes.

• Yosano, Dazai, and Kyouka all share a close somewhat familial bond over their dealings with the port mafia and Mori. Yosano also has a spare key to Dazai’s dorm incase he relapses.

• Dazai still cannot cook for shit no matter how people try to teach him, not even his mentor crush Atsushi is successful in doing so.

• Dazai always feels intimidated by Fukuzawa, and tries his hardest to avoid eye contact with him afraid he’ll disrespect him.

• the dynamics of skk and sskk are mostly unchanged other than sskk being both wiser between themselves, and skk being two feral little shits that need to be put in cages.

not sure if I mentioned Chuuya and Akutagawa being swapped like Dazai and Atsushi. Oops.

Look at that you got to the end, feels good? Bad? Well you got here anyways. I quite enjoyed rambling to the walls of my enclosure hoping to be given a piece of cheese, I actually forgot about my stresses for a moment whilst i ran to go grab my sketches. ‘Twas nice, happy holidays you crazy people who decided to read this post.

[arkastadt]

i'm quietly watching you update Falling Through the Ice, and it's so hard not to engage bc it looks so cool, but i'm deathly afraid of unfinished work

you're getting to me though, you monster

also i literally just read ur fem!skk oneshot, peak 10/10 thank you

Hehehw maybe you can start reading FTI when it has ~3-4 chapters left bc that will mean I will have already finished it in my drafts! For example, on ao3 we‘re on chapter 19 rn but in terms of my actual drafts I‘m somewhere between chapter 26-27 :) and thank you!!! I‘m glad you enjoyed my fem skk I love writing fem skk more than anything <3

[sskk-ao3feed]

Unfinished BSD catalouge

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/5LxkVyD by yennisaka In order to boost my popularity (so i can get some fanfic comms and feed my family) I decided to post some of my unfinished bungou stray dogs fanfics, and if yall want, you guys can ask me to finish some so you can enjoy shit like that. Mostly skk! Words: 10084, Chapters: 4/?, Language: English Fandoms: 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: M/M Characters: Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu (Bungou Stray Dogs), Akutagawa Ryuunosuke (Bungou Stray Dogs), Edogawa Ranpo (Bungou Stray Dogs), Mori Ougai (Bungou Stray Dogs), Armed Detective Agency Ensemble (Bungou Stray Dogs), Armed Detective Agency and Port Mafia Ensembles (Bungou Stray Dogs), Port Mafia Ensemble (Bungou Stray Dogs) Relationships: Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Akutagawa Ryuunosuke/Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu & Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu & Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs), Akutagawa Ryuunosuke & Nakajima Atsushi (Bungou Stray Dogs) Additional Tags: I'm Bad At Tagging, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, IDK BRO read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/5LxkVyD

[aiviloti]

my 2020 fic writer wrap-up!!

this is going to be incredibly long (a total of 1.1k lmao) so imma put a cut here, but basically thank you for being here all throughout my 2020! i appreciate you all very much <3

fav kind of fic to write:

i love writing about mutual pining slow burn process of getting together but i have NEVER WRITTEN ONE IN MY LIFE so i hope to change that in 2021

in 2020 i discovered??? humour??? so i enjoy writing about that and when people tell me i’ve succeeded in making them laugh it’s all 😳😳😳 for me

hardest fic to write but also most proud of:

to write you a song was a fic i struggled with from all of april to june which is very long?? to me??? considering i usually sit down and write things in one seating. fully fleshed ideas don’t usually take me thaaaaaat long to crunch out, but for some reason i struggled bad with this bc I really didn’t know where i was going w it lol

LA LA LAND gets an honorary mention of it’s own simply because it was 44k, and it took me all of july-september, but it’s something i still am proud of! to show how difficult it was to write/plot here’s the spreadsheet i had to use to keep track of the scenes and the chapters djkgfsjdfkjhgd

Shout out to kiroiimye , sweet , sirius and krypt for keeping my sanity intact

easiest fic to write:

this genshin impact fic: The Land Favoured by the Wind but its because ive been thinking about this idea for more than a month lol so the actual writing and editing took me less than 3 hours

there were several others too, bc ideas then to hook themselves to me then refuse to let go fjshlfgdfsg

fav fic to write:

Most definitely this sakuatsu monstrosity here by the name of Miya Atsumu's unwavering love for Sakusa Kiyoomi and an unholy amount of terrible food analogies that should not have the right to Exist lol, I only came up with the idea of Atsumu asking Osamu how to make friends bc I was friendship pining for someone at the time and then proceeded to write the entirety of it in a feverish daze! It’s as of rn my top hit / kudoed / bookmarked fic on ao3 and man, thanks for liking this as much as i did :’D

writing sequence:

i have to write from start to finish lmao i cant move on if the fic isnt chronological? the only exception was la la land bc it was too long and i had help from the spreadsheet so i alr knew where i was going i just had to write it down dfhdsfksfksdfhjg

deleting works:

the only fics i remember deleting are both first chapters of a multichap, bc i dont like having unfinished pieces on ao3, and far less if im not sure if ill finish them/if i dont know where im going w it!

if it’s dark history of shit 15 year old me wrote imma keep it there! it is an archive after all. go on, judge my fics from 5 years ago ahahahaha

best writing advice:

not a general thing and might just apply tome, but i tend to write in very convoluted ways and squish a lot in my sentences, or add to many unnecessary commas, so i received advice recently about being more mindful of the pacing and it’s helped me a lot!

worst writing advice:

none at the top of my head djgfkdsjfh if it’s bs to me i just forget it entirelyyyy

collab:

@actuallyasweetpotato​ (also aforementioned sweet) and i did a thing for bokuaka week!!!! you can find it here:  under my breath and into your scarf

wips:

9 unfinished zine pieces, 3 commissions, 1 exchange piece, about 10 or so other things

fav story of another writer:

favourite things 

manly man falls for manliest man krbk fic!!!

gently, like a winter wind iwaoi birthday fic

sunchaser krbk fic

JUNO atsuhina fic

best review:

dude i cried

and shoutout to tien , sirius for fan art, fan comics, fan animatics of fics ive written, and shoutout to akemiiiii for this song they wrote i am eternaally grateful

worst review:

no negativity today!

prequel/sequel to other people’s fics:

none at the top of my head hm, but if anything probably any of kiro skk stuff 

do i reread my stuff:

yes, but only if they’re old enough for me to go “it’s okay even if i dont like it bc this is old”

published:

hopefully! even though i do take part in zines and i guess they already have been published in a broad sense

fav/least fav chara to write:

no one at the top of my head! it’s instinctive for me to go ahead and think about character motives whenever i come across them, so if i ever write about someone, i usually just put my spin/interpretation of a character in a way that i can comprehend. the pros of this is i can write about many people, and the downside is that these characterisations can come off as out of character to anyone who doesn’t agree w me hehe

deadlines or goals:

if it’s a oneshot that’s under 3k i usually aim to have it done within 24 hours of beginning the fic. even tho i rarely succeed, having that as a goal usually pushes me to get it done faster than i would have if i had no goal altogether! if it’s anything long i aim for 1k a day, tho rn all my deadlines are zine deadlines and on top of that there’s uni, so to say im not stressing about writing would be a lie LOL

fav writers: (am too shy to tag but i swear these people are literal gods)

chonideno (mag): tumblr | twitter | ao3

batman (teesta): twitter | ao3

maplefudge (raei): tumblr | twitter | ao3

trope never written, would like to try:

aforementioned SLOWBURN MUTUAL PINING ANGST W A HAPPY ENDING GETTING TOGETHER!!!

but also royalty au

trope you will never write:

haha loads

how long have you been a writer:

began writing around may of 2014!! it was a horrible piece but im glad i started somewhere

influences:

chonideno/mag is one! maggie stiefvater who wrote the raven boys is also one, among many others

hardest part of writing: 

writing action? writing things that are happening right now, describing people talking, eating

easiest part of writing:

descriptions of people, places, feelings. internal monologues, the like

best part of writing:

sharing how i perceive the world w other people, and discovering other people agree

wip sneak peek:

cw: hanahaki, falling out of love

this was written in a friend’s dms lmao this is why i sound like this

something unique i bring to all my stories

i had a revelation the other day after talking to all my friends and realised i have really pretentious titles

IF YOU’RE HERE

did you know the wc of this thing is 1k words? idk why you stuck through all of that but thank you. i’ll keep writing in 2021, and all the years after that, and i hope i’ll find you doing things you love too :)

[daughterofsinsloth]

Hello! I’m the Anon who asked for the Multi-Chapter SKK last month(?) and I seriously love your recommendations! I’m still reading halfway since I started my own fic after reading so much! Thank you so much for this it seriously helped me to improve me writing skills (tho I’m still quite nervous). I hope I’m not asking too much but if you were to suggest me a multi-chapter or one shot smut of SKK, what would it be? Somehow writing smut is my biggest problem as a fic writer 😂

hello hello anon-chaaaan!!!! yes of course I remember you!!! how have you been?

Im sooo happy that you enjoyed my recommendations! have fun reading the rest!!! :) 

oh my?! really!!!!??? thats great! writing is great and fun! dont do what I did and give up! you write coz you have a brilliant idea and want to share.  its for your own soul and dreams and should be proud of  your works! a good friends said to me that “ Your writing is important because it’s yours and your content is valuable because you put your heart into it.” (love you @i-fuzzed-up).dont be nervous and enjoy the ride. words come more easy when you let go of yourself and becoming one with the story! besides you dont have to write it right now! take your time and reread it as much as you want. Im sure that its gonna be great! I will be waiting to read it!!!! have fun and a great time writing !!! Nothing is perfect; you make it to be perfect!!! also also a huge hug for putting so much soul in it and wanting to improve! you are working hard!!! huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugs

now! can I say that I was waiting for this ask all of my life? not gonna lie smut is great! but also hard I understand you dear anon! the awkwardness… the shyness… man smut is hard..

but worry not my friend! I got you! ;)

since I dont know what your fic is about, I will give you various of fics multi and one-shots; AU or CANON 

Touch Me by murderousprey :

okay lets start with an AU! it takes place after the war, at modern Japan in the 40′ . its about teacher!Dazai and military!Chuuya with age difference. its Chuuya’s first time with his crush and Dazai is sedusive as always. good back story too. well-writen and cinematic. they built well the story and the deed around the emotions that this two have. one-shot

A toast to our beginning by AnonLearnsToWrite :

another AU with barsinger!Chuuya and mafiaboss!Dazai. dark and spicy.well written and totally , 1000% gets you there. you can see cleary their chemistry at every levels. nice story too. one shot

kiss me on the lips(and show you love me) by photography_tea :

I have talked about this before. smut with feelings but more like make love. really great fic. canon verse, one-shot

Mine by stargazerlilith :

also great great fic. reflecks perfictally their relationship. one-shot. well written, chuuya is a badass. dazai’s strangle is being shown really grea tat the background. chuuya wants them to try again and that kills me.

It’s About To Go Down, We Go Have A Show Down by shakethatcas :

college!AU smut at the library. also has a bit of crack. one-shot.  

The Monster and Ennui by caitybelle_ackeryandere :

the first one is AU with sugar daddy!dazai and sugar baby!chuuya.its multi, but unfinished. still great tho. nice builted up story and really dark. the second one its canon verse. they meet up after a long time. its hate hate hate and end up painfully with feelings. one-shot

Centripetal by owlsareheadturners:

I absolutely loooove this fic! its after ep 16 of season 1.  drunk but sweet in the some time. there is something in it that makes it great. feelings everywhere and denial is there too.its kinda cute actually. one-shot but freaking long

a very common crisis by Lua :

this is what a call “longing smut”. through chuuya’s eyes there “love game” and the longing in it. it sumply has to be only this two. no one else but they.  its about dazai holding chuuya’s wirst every time they do the deed and that that represent their relationship. like their conecting point. one-shot

some works by Kibasix:

Show Me What I Can’t See (When The Spark In My Eyes Is Gone)

Anything You Say Can And Will Be Held Against You (So Only Say My Name, It Will Be Held Against You)

(A Little Less Sixteen Candles) A Little More Touch Me

Saying Goodbye by naughthere :

a sad sad one-shot.lots lots of feelings as Dazai decides to leave Chuuya behind; chuuya tries to figure what to do now.

eighth time’s the charm by izayas :

student!AU. okay this kids are trying; leave them alone! fluff, crack, smut all together! it took 8 tries for them but finilly they made it! one-shot

Stones In Glass House  by mostladylikeladythateverladied:

another favorite fic! jealous!dazai on a mission. fyudor is there. chuuya is gorgeous and he knows it! its semi-public. a great great one-shot

some works by Kuronoa:

The One-Shots Kura Swept Under the Rug

It’s me or the bike (Obviously, it’s the bike)

Bury Me in Chrysanthemums

Desire

The Bet by FallenAkito :

a must must! love this fic. its funny. a true Dazai fic! one-shhot

all works by SHSLFriends

all works by Memos

Shots in The Dark by Calorae :

another great bet for chuuya! this time he doesnt regter it ;  not that he doeas with the others too here we are in mafia’s days. one-shot

The Glow of Blinded Room by Raven_Rein :

one-shot, there is a narrator here. its a bit of adrenaline, a bit of drunkness and a lots of emotions. its a good one.

You're so beautiful Dazai by chuuyaass :

a favorite one! one-shot. It starts with Chuuya and Dazai fooling around in an elevator but leads to Chuuya wanting to take care of Dazai. He deserves to feel loved. dazai and happiness right????

Illustrations of Lying by writingfromtheshadows:

ooooh i forgot this one on your prievious ask!!! okay okay this onehas it all and its super duper awsome!!!!! its multi with 20 chptrs. its canon verse with mafia dazai. its amazing at ever level! dark, anxious, agony, fear, love. everything!

okay anon-chan Im gonna stop here or you will never finish reading!!!!!

happy happy reading and be well! I will be waiting for your fic!!!!!

tell me if you need something more, okay? you can also text me!

be well! :)

have a wonderful day!

[chubbyhippo]

Thanks to @chom-raaa for the tag :D

1. How did you come up with your username and what does it mean?

It’s just cute so I keep using it haha

2. Which fanfic of yours has the most feedback? (bookmarks/subscriptions/hits/kudos)

Disregarding subs, Fire in the Night.

3. What is your AO3 profile icon, and why did you choose it?

It’s a succulent! I chose it, because in Chinese they’re literally called plants with a lot of meat so I thought it’d be fitting.

4. Do you have any regular/favourite commenters?

Yes! I’m so thankful for them <3

5. Is there a fanfic that you keep going back to read again and again?

There are a lot, but the most recent ones I can recall off the top of my head are:

Fair Ankles by Kells Literally everything by Xen but especially Whatever It Takes b/c fake dating is best trope ofc Striped by Alice and also her Doses of Serotonin series (don’t let the name fool you, most of them made me feel feelings of not well-being and happiness) Le Parfum des Fleurs series by Star dusk and there's nothing i can do and how could i live without you by Catsby

There’s a lot more that I love and reread often but I’ve been busy and not reading much so these are the ones I remember :)

6. How many stories are you subscribed to? How many do you have bookmarked?

No subs and 10 bookmarks (I don’t really use the system on ao3)

7. Which AU do you find yourself writing the most?

I’ve written a lot of different AUs, but I supposed a common one is brothel!Chuuya or just miserable childhood chuuya haha

8. How many people are subscribed and bookmarked to you in total? (you can view this on the stats page)

User subs: 8 Work subs: 23 Bookmarks: 65

9. Is there something you’d like to write about but are afraid of people judging you for it? (Feeling brave? If so, share it!)

Basically everything, but that’s what online anonymity’s for

10. Is there anything you would like to be better at? Writing certain scenes or genres, replying to comments, updating better, etc.

Writing specific: I’d like to improve on writing longer stories with actual plot Other: I’m basically constantly in writer’s block and only feel the creative burst to write every month or so and I’d like to write more often and make it a habit

11. Do you write rarepairs or popular ships more often?

I mostly write skk so I supposed popular ships.

12. How many stories have you posted on AO3 to this day (finished and unfinished)?

11!

13. How many stories do you have saved in/with your writing program?

Oh boy, lemme see... 4 with a decent portion written and ~14 others with plans RIP

14. Do you write down story ideas, or just keep them in your head?

I try to jot them down b/c I have a terrible memory.

15. Have you ever co-authored a story?

Nope, but I’d love to :)

/cough/ we’re not counting that shelved one right? @miwagashi

16. How did you discover AO3?

I honestly have no idea. I’m guessing I just migrated over with an author from ff.net

17. Do you consider yourself to be a popular or famous author in your fandom(s) on AO3?

ahah you’re so funny

18. Do you have a nickname or fandom name for your readers?

Nope.

19. Was there an author who inspired or encouraged you to write?

Nope.

20. What writing advice would you give to a beginning author?

Just do it. And then edit like mad.

21. Do you plot out your stories, or do you just figure it out as you go?

Plot them out, but leave room for adjustments.

22. Have you ever gotten a bad comment on a story? If so, what did you do?

Nope, hasn’t happened yet haha

23. Is there a certain type of scene that you have a hard time writing? (action, smut, etc..)

I don’t think it’s necessarily a specific type of scene, but rather just when something doesn’t flow smoothly I can’t continue.

24. What story(s) are you working on now?

I am currently rotating priority on 4 one-shots, 2 multi-chapter fics, and the 4 skk week fics I never finished, but at this precise moment I’m working on Day 3 of the skk week fics.

25. Do you plan your next project(s) before you finish your current ongoing story(s)?

My ‘next projects’ just hit me when they want to with absolute disregard for my schedule so I’d say yes, yes I do.

26. Do you have a daily writing goal set for yourself?

My daily goal is to attempt to write a word /sob/ I’m in writer’s block 24/7 T^T

27. Do you think you’ve improved as a writer since you first started?

Probably.

28. What is your favorite story that you’ve written?

It’s actually so hard to choose, but I’d say had we but world enough and time and some to misery are born for skk and Live to Die Another Day for gen-ish (the pairing-less fate of this fic is so sad lol)

29. What is your least favorite story that you’ve written?

Ch 3 of Soul Oath: I don’t particularly dislike this story per se, but I struggled so hard writing it so I cringe when I see it.

30. Where do you see yourself (as a writer) in 5 years?

Hopefully with more works out and with a better/consistent uploading situation.

31. What is the easiest thing about writing?

The before and after (the planning and the editing)

32. What is the hardest thing about writing?

THE WRITING aka putting words together that actually get my point across while being subtly symbolic and grammatically correct.

33. Why do you write?

Because I enjoy it :) I’ve always liked exploring various themes through the lens of various characters and imagining how they would react.

Tagging anyone who wants to do it :)

[miwagashi]

 Thank you for the tag @chom-raaa​ <3

1. How did you come up with your username and what does it mean?

It’s based off an OC of mine (that loosely fits into the Noragami universe). Inaccurate translates to ‘God(dess) of Sweets’

2. Which fanfic of yours has the most feedback? (bookmarks/subscriptions/hits/kudos)

Memories of Tomorrow (and it’s guilting me into churning out the rest of the chapters ;w;

3. What is your AO3 profile icon, and why did you choose it?

Rufus (from Pandora Hearts) making a pouty face. No particular aside from just liking and relating to it.

4. Do you have any regular/favourite commenters?

Yes! So very thankful to them <3

5. Is there a fanfic that you keep going back to read again and again?

At some point I reread a lot but not so much lately. These are a few of the ones I keep going back to though (all skk):

i wont lie (i knew you belonged here), and the crashes are heaven for a sinner like me (never let me go), and flowers that bloom in the darkness

6. How many stories are you subscribed to? How many do you have bookmarked?

1 story sub and 15 bookmarks

7. Which AU do you find yourself writing the most?

None? I mean, ‘modern’ au I guess? It almost doesn’t feel like an au though 

8. How many people are subscribed and bookmarked to you in total? (you can view this on the stats page)

subscriptions: 7 user subs and 68 work subs bookmarks: 109 bookmarks

9. Is there something you’d like to write about but are afraid of people judging you for it? (Feeling brave? If so, share it!)

Not really? I mean... aside from some nsfw stuff that is never getting written (but that’s more because I can’t write smat for shit)

10. Is there anything you would like to be better at? Writing certain scenes or genres, replying to comments, updating better, etc.

anything to do with consistency... updating... style... writing... > >;;

11. Do you write rarepairs or popular ships more often?

I typically write skk but I want to branch into some rarepairs!

12. How many stories have you posted on AO3 to this day (finished and unfinished)?

16 (+1 now deleted...) 

13. How many stories do you have saved in/with your writing program?

Too many

14. Do you write down story ideas, or just keep them in your head?

I write them down if I remember to... but sometimes they just float.

15. Have you ever co-authored a story?

Nope ^^ That would be cool though

16. How did you discover AO3?

I... don’t actually know... I think it might have been from looking for sarumi fics and I somehow wound up on ao3... 

17. Do you consider yourself to be a popular or famous author in your fandom(s) on AO3?

What a funny joke :’> 

18. Do you have a nickname or fandom name for your readers?

Nope

19. Was there an author who inspired or encouraged you to write?

Not before I started.

20. What writing advice would you give to a beginning author?

Just write. That nagging headcanon in your head? Do it. Write it. Want smat for your rarepair? Go for it :>

21. Do you plot out your stories, or do you just figure it out as you go?

I tend to plot because it’s easier than writing... and that’s really the part I enjoy 

22. Have you ever gotten a bad comment on a story? If so, what did you do?

Not a bad comment per say but there was one that.. missed the point and I was down for a bit ;w; What did I do? Sulk about it and then suck it up ;; 

23. Is there a certain type of scene that you have a hard time writing? (action, smut, etc..)

Action and conveying hidden emotions subtly... 

24. What story(s) are you working on now?

Too many :’> I get bored of working on the same thing... usually resulting in too many WIPs each with like 100 words... > >;;

25. Do you plan your next project(s) before you finish your current ongoing story(s)?

Next projects just barrel in without my consent... so uh... yes... 

26. Do you have a daily writing goal set for yourself?

Not at all, though I would like to if I had better self-discipline.

27. Do you think you’ve improved as a writer since you first started?

Probably.

28. What is your favorite story that you’ve written?

It’s a draw between Tears Better Left Unshed and lesson (not) learned. I enjoy writing the neuro oneshots although there aren’t my favs

29. What is your least favorite story that you’ve written?

Perfect Fit... and... I have nothing against Feverish but it didn’t end up as I envisioned... 

30. Where do you see yourself (as a writer) in 5 years?

Hopefully better at posting on a somewhat regular basis or... retreating to my hermit shell of WIPs/ideas that continues to accumulate without shrinking...

31. What is the easiest thing about writing?

Planning and plotting

32. What is the hardest thing about writing?

...Actually churning out sentences that flow and make sense. 

33. Why do you write?

To satisfy my thirst for certain ship scenes... Hence the ‘I like coming up with scenarios but hate writing’ qwq

Tagging anyone who’s interested!