#Also I'm in that odd phase of the crush where I'm a little insecure about it-afjsbfkdjfk | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

justyoursimpleflower · 3 years ago

Text

Gorgeous

Pairing- James Potter x werewolf!Lupin!female!reader. (That's a mouthful)

Summary:- reader has a tiny bit of crush on school's golden boy and she finds him very gorgeous but she can't say anything to his face.

Word count:- 4.3k (damn)

Warning:- mentions of scars, alcohol, insecurities. (I think this is but inform me if any other) also lets pretend James has ocean blue eyes.

A/N:- so here it is the one shot promised based on the song Gorgeous, I wanted to make something silly kind of but it turned out different than that but alright. It is based on the song called gorgeous by Taylor Swift but I changed something. If you find any errors please inform me. Enjoy read! And thanks to @ultarviolence for actually suggesting to with whom the oneshot be. Credits for the pictures goes to their rightful owners, I only own the collage. Tiny bit of wolfstar too. Also a reblog will be helpful.👉👈

Masterlist

Petrichor. The earthy smell filled your heightened senses as you felt him coming near you. As much as it intimidated you, it was bliss, somehow it relaxed you. But maybe even in that bliss you were aware how he affected you. Your back still towards him you started walking away from him, everyone was congratulating him on quidditch pitch after his marvellous performance against Slytherin, and here you were walking away from him.

You told Remus that you rather snuggle in your blankets and relax before the full moon but he was stubborn, just like you, and dragged you to quidditch pitch. It was even alright till you had to sit in the rain and watch the match but it all blew up when he saw you sitting in the stands, still on his broom he caught your eye and winked at you, causing a rush a shiver to run down your spine and feel the gross butterflies (it's not like you were looking for him all around the pitch). Alright maybe you were. But that doesn't mean it meant something.

Actually it meant everything. He was gorgeous, more than beautiful. He was breathtaking.

You almost were out of the pitch when a hand wrapped around your scarred one and you internally groaned. Turning around and coming face to face with your worst fear.

He looked at you with those freaking ocean blue eyes. Inhaling deep breath, you stared back at him, directly in his eyes.

You didn't know if he was intimidated by your glare or just trying not to laugh at your cowardice, when his throat bobbed when he gulped.

He released a airy laugh and said,

"Won't you congratulate me for my amazing performance?" He tilted his head, acting innocent. And honestly, he was looking adorable.

Shut up.

'All I want to say is that you are gorgeous.'

"Your ego is big enough without me inflating it." Your words betraying your thoughts. It did nothing to him but made him smirk a little more.

You rolled your eyes and turned around and started walking away.

"At least come to the party!" His voice bounced and reached you.

Merlin, why he is so gorgeous.

You internally groaned as you felt Lily shaking your shoulders.

"Female Lupin, if you don't get up right now, I am going to get male Lupin and make you have a good conversation with him."

"But Lils!" You whined. You had no intention in going to that ruddy party, where James bloody Potter would be.

She sighed and sat down next to a lying figure on the bed. She started running her hands in your hair, humming softly.

You looked at her. Actually looked at her. What was there not to like? She was perfect in studies, had the most magical eyes, the softest hair and kindest heart. On the other hand you were nothing like her.

You were a monster.

Each full moon, you hunted for lives, each full moon, you became a monster.

But no one knew that, except a handful of people. And unluckily, he too knew that. What phased you more was that he was ready to take a risk upon his life by being with you and your brother in those dark nights where you both lose yourselves to your inner monsters.

You always felt comfort in thinking that it was all for Remus, you just got to be a part of it due to you having no other place than the Shack. Who knows that if it hadn't been because of your condition, he would have noticed that you existed?

You were shaken out of your thoughts when you heard a loud bang on the door. Lily looked at you in confusion but gave you a look when found you doing the same to her. She got up and opened the door and found Marlene smiling giddily at both of you.

"What are you two doing here?" She exclaimed.

"The party has started!" She exclaimed and now did you notice that her words were slurred.

At least there is alcohol.

"Marlene...the party just started and you are drunk." Lily said with sigh, disappointment evident on her face.

Marlene just grinned, flipped her hair and started descending the stairs whilst saying something along the line,

"It's just the starter."

Lily turned towards you and opened her mouth to say something but we're stopped by the sudden thumping sound that came from the stairs. You got up quickly from your bed and looked downwards with Lily on your side.

On the stairs, Marlene was laying face on the top most stairs, her hair sprawled on the floor just outside your dormitory.

A gasp left Lily's lips and she crouched down to look at your friend, while you were trying your best to stop the laugh that was about to leave your lips. You too crouched down to her level but before you could say anything Marlene suddenly jumped and sat with her legs crossed, facing you both.

Lily gasped and your eyes went wide with shock but when you both looked at Marlene, she was just giving you both a cheeky smile.

"Merlin, women! Thought you were possessed for a moment!" You exclaimed with a hand on your chest.

You got no reaction from her, instead she just stood up and pulled you both too in a standing position.

"I forgot that I was bribed to drag both of your arses downstairs."

You squint your eyes and raising a brow you said,

"Who bribed you?"

Her face light up and smiling widely, she threw her hands in the air and exclaimed,

"Pames Jotter!"

Lily smacked her hand on her forehead, you winced just thinking how painful it would have been, assuming by the sound.

You heard Marlene's giggles and turned towards her.

"Get it? Pames Jotter is James Potter!" She giggled harder and smiled widely.

You visibly shivered at the name. You eyed the blonde in front of you and started thinking of all the things that you could use to convince her and let you go.

You slowly approached the opportunity,

"Marlene..."

Marlene who had broken into a dance, swaying Lily with her stopped abruptly and looked at you. All humor was wiped away from her face.

You sighed then looked at her,

"You are not drunk, are you?"

She turned towards you and smiled sheepishly,

"I don't know what you are talking about."

"You are forgetting that I am the twin of Remus Lupin. We notice small things."

Marlene sighed and looked to be contemplating something before breaking the facade.

"Yeah, alright, I was acting." Lily hit her arm as soon as the words left her mouth and Marlene grumbled about how she was kind of pissed off by the Lupin siblings in a not so respectful way.

"Why?" You whined to Marlene.

She rolled her eyes and said,

"Because I know that you were not going to come unless practically dragged down.

"So?"

"So? So? Just because you have a crush on the school's golden boy doesn't mean that you should rot in the dorm when everyone else is having a swing."

You felt flustered about how obvious were your feelings for him, you opened your mouth to retort but you couldn't find a better reason. Afterall, it was the reason you refused to be down at the party. You sighed and tried to ignore your friends' pitying faces.

"Okay, let's do this, we go to the party, have the time of your life, whilst we find something that you don't have to interact with him."

"And how we do this?" You raised an eyebrow, seriously questioning your friend's mind,

"I mean, how are we going to do this? He was the one who organised the party."

Marlene let a smirk form on her face and said,

"Technically, the party was organised because of him, not by him."

"Yeah, and that helps a lot." Lily rolled her eyes.

"You don't get it Lils! We are going to be so drunk and stay as far as possible from him."

You clapped your hands and said,

"Yes! We will get drunk and stay in our dorms! Go Marls, bring some drinks!"

Marlene rolled her eyes and took a threatening step towards you.

"Okay, enough, now you are going to get ready or I am dragging you just like this."

You opened your mouth to say something but,

"Nope! No, no more whining!" She cut you off.

She then clapped her hands and said,

"Alright, both of you get ready, I'll see you downstairs!"

She smiled and kissed your cheek before descending down the stairs.

You looked at Lily and sighed. When you saw her smirking you gave her a dry look and finally accepted your faith.

"Alright, girl, slow down." Remus said from your side, where he had been standing and rubbing your back for the past fifteen minutes.

After you came to the party, you were convinced that Lily and Marlene were not going to leave your side. But who were you kidding? They left you ten minutes in the party, saying that you need to live up and actually let James have his way with you.

You almost scoffed at the thought. James wanted nothing but to tease you by just assuming you fancied him. Only if he knew how true that was.

You were about to take a sip from your cup when it was snatched away from your hand,

"Hey!" You hit Remus on his arm for it but he did nothing other than shrug.

"You almost had enough to last you a lifetime."

When he saw your sour expression he sighed,

"Listen, I don't have any problem with how much you drink. If I am being honest, I love it when you get drunk, you spill all your secrets but I don't want you to grumble when you have the baddest hangover."

You gave him an odd look with your arms folded over your chest, you said,

"I don't tell any secrets when I'm drunk."

"Oh you so do."

"Do not."

"Do too."

"Tell me about one."

"You got the biggest crush on James."

You opened your mouth to counter his remark but your words died in your throat. Swallowing hard you whispered,

"I didn't…"

A smirk formed on his lips,

"You did."

You held your head in your hands and propped your elbows on the drink table near. You wanted to have the time of your life and here you were, finding out that you told your brother about your crush on his friend.

"You don't have any problem with it?" You mumbled with your head still in your hands.

Remus saw your sour expression and pulled your arm lightly and said,

"Hey, don't be sad now."

"Yeah, my brother found out that I have a crush on one of his best mates is not concerning."

"If it makes you feel better, I think he likes you too."

You gave him a dry look and took one more cup and gulped it in a single sip. The liquid burned your throat but atleast it was good enough to lighten the pressure on your head.

"Have you heard the way he talks?" You asked Remus who raised an eyebrow, clearly finding amusement in your condition. You gave him an annoyed look and continued,

"He talks like he knows all about everything. 'At Least come to the party', bloody buffoon. He–he knew that I would react this way and still! His voice is like the clawing of nails on iron. It gives me headache!" You looked at Remus who still had an annoying smile on his face,

"Why are you smiling?" You asked him annoyed.

"Why don't you say this to his face? Maybe he will go away" He suggested and you thought about this, maybe he was right. You found him looking behind you, you followed his eyesight and you frown deepened. Another glass down.

In front of you was James Potter goofing around with his best mate Sirius Black when other people were gawking at their sights.

"Doesn't he feel scared about how much people are attracted to him?" You mumbled to yourself but Remus heard you anyway and chuckled. You turned and glared at him.

"Honestly, why don't you just say all this to him? You know, it would be better." He said.

"You wait Remus Lupin till I find out about the person you like, then we will see." You turned towards the table again only to find the person you were not so subtly judging only to find him gone from there. Frowning, you raise your cup back to your lips and empty its contents in your throat. A shiver ran down your spine as the liquid burned your insides. You were starting to feel the outputs of the alcohol inside your system, your head started feeling dizzy and it felt really light. You turned around to find Remus surrounded by the Marauders this time and one of them was looking at you, he was looking at you.

Sirius draped his arm around your shoulder, breaking you out of the trance. You stumbled a bit as the alcohol in your system started taking a toll on you.

"Where's your boyfriend Y/N?" He asked you in mock concern.

You rolled your eyes but it did nothing other than increase the slowly growing headache you had.

A chuckle passed James's lips making you look at him, and unfortunately (or fortunately) he looked at you at the same time. You quickly diverted your eyes and shoved Sirius's arm from around you.

"Very funny, Black."

He grinned at you whereas you were slowly getting more and more dizzy.

"He still looks so scared whenever he looks at James."

You tried to hide your smile but it slipped anyway. Maybe you didn't know but your smile made James grin.

"Wait, why is he scared of James?" Remus asked suddenly. Your eyes widened at his words.

Oh shoot he didn't know.

It seemed like they too realised their mistake. They started stumbling over their words and you knew it was all on you.

"Where is Peter?" You asked, trying your best to change the topic.

Remus gave you a curious look but didn't question further.

"Er—Remus, come dance with me, won't you?" Sirius offered his arm to Remus, his nervous expression fading into a wide smirk. His words caused a blush to tint on Remus' cheeks and a small smile to form on his lips.

"Sure." And with that, they both left your drunk self with a very sober looking James Potter.

"Um–I think Marlene was calling me, I am going." You were about to walk away before he caught you by arm and pulled you back. You stumbled a bit, clearly due to intoxicating alcohol, or was it because of him.

"You never spend time with me." He pouted looking at you with those ocean blue eyes.

You were in such a daze that you didn't even react to his words. One reason was that now you were completely intoxicated and the other was that it was him.

"Well...you should take it as a compliment that I talk to everyone but you."

He was about to reply when suddenly darkness spread across the room. Shouts and protests rang out in the room, all increasing your headache.

Your hands frantically searched for something to hold on, when a bigger hand enveloped yours in it. It took time but your eyes adjusted in the darkness and you could lightly make out the face of the person holding your hand. Suddenly all the voices seemed to dim, suddenly the darkness was enough for you, suddenly you felt calm. Your stomach was churning but you were damn sure it wasn't the firewhisky.

You should think about the consequence of you touching my hand in the darkened room.

He pulled you closer to him by his grip on your hand. He wrapped his other arm around your shoulder and instinctively your head leaned on his shoulder.

You felt his breath hitch but you chose not to say anything.

"Someone was informed that McGonagall was on round, the candles will be lit again soon." He almost whispered to you. And just then the candles were lit again.

James expected you to draw away from him as soon as the candles were lit again but you didn't move from your position. Still wrapped around his side.

And he was definitely not complaining.

"James...dance with me?" You asked, lifting your head from his shoulder. You looked so innocent and adorable that he couldn't deny your face.

Or because of the fact that he was never in a lifetime going to lose this opportunity.

"Okay."

And just like that you both started to sway along the rhythm, so lost in your world that no one else existed for you two.

"You know what, you always scared me." He admitted, making you giggle.

"Why?" You asked, your head on his chest as he guided you both in a swaying way.

"First, you are Remus's sister, second, you are damn good with your tongue." It took him a while to understand what he said but till you were in a giggling fit. You were laughing so hard that you had to hold him so you wouldn't fall.

"Wait—wait, I didn't mean it like that!" He exclaimed, his hand wrapped around yours which was holding his shoulder. But you couldn't stop laughing, and that resulted in you missing the smile on his face.

When you finally stopped, you looked up to find him waving to someone. Following his gaze, you found a beautiful brunette from Ravenclaw giggling and waving at him.

Something inside you bubbled, whether it was the alcohol in your system or you were actually being brave that time, you nudged his arm and made him look at you.

"Is she your girlfriend?"

His eyes widened at your words, he whipped his head between you and that girl before shaking it violently.

"Merlin, no! She's actually the daughter of one of Mum's friends."

"Oh."

James looked at you and the way your shoulders visibly relaxed at words and your head went between his shoulder and neck, resting there.

"If it makes you feel better, I'm single."

You again, moved your head from his shoulder and this time he found an adorable pout on your lips.

"It doesn't." You said. He raised an eyebrow and said,

"It doesn't?" And you shook your head.

"It's worse actually, because you are so gorgeous that it hurts."

Your eyes fixed at his face, and even intoxicated, you were able to appreciate his beauty. He was gorgeous in every way, he was a good person, he had an aura around him that made everyone around him happy, one of the reasons you hated him, he was beautiful. He was gorgeous. And his eyes, his eyes were enough to make you feel like, sinking, drowning, dying.

"Don't I make you feel happy?"

"You make me feel so happy that it turns back to sadness," your bottom lip jutting out.

"There's nothing I hate more than what I can't have, and you why? Because all my life, I lost so many things that I don't want to hope for what I can't have. And I'm so furious at you for making me feel like this."

James moved his hand and rested it on your cheek, making you look at him, he chuckled.

"It's not funny." You said, removing his hand from your cheek. Again resting on your head on his shoulder.

James kept swaying you both, still processing everything that had happened in such a less amount of time. He was slowly feeling you relax around him, the whole night taking a toll on you.

"Hey, honey, you can't sleep like that." He said lowly to you. When you didn't budge, he nudged your head from his shoulder,

"Don't sleep like that." He said, making a frown take over your lips.

"I'm not asleep, my mind is alive." You grumbled in a sleepy voice. You felt his shoulder shake from the soft laugh escaping his lips, making you look up at him.

James could see the exhaustion and sleep in your eyes and decided that it was about time, you both called it a night.

"Alright, I think it's time you leave."

A frown formed on your lips, removing any traces of the sleepy face that you had. A dramatic sigh left your lips, you said,

"Guess, I have to stumble home to my cats. Alone."

"Y/N, you don't have any cat, and you just need to go to your dorm." James said, too used to these kinds of antics, all because of a certain Gryffindor.

You pouted, moving yourself to hug him and resting your head again on his shoulder.

"But, Remus always takes me with him, whenever I'm drunk."

"Yeah, but I'm not Remus, and he might actually murder me for doing so."

You looked up at him, trying your best to do puppy-dog eyes. Your idea seemed to work as he sighed in defeat.

"Alright, but if Remus kills me in the morning, it will be your fault."

It took time but you both finally reached the Marauders dorm, and there was only one person there. Peter, and he too was sleeping.

James took you and made you sit on one of the beds in the corner. He was still standing over you, looking quite flustered. You ran a hand on the messy bed sheet and looked up at him again to find him filling a glass with water.

"Is this Remus's bed?" You asked.

"Yeah." He said before handing you the glass of water, which you quickly downed and handed him the glass back.

James crouched in front of you and started removing your footwears. You ran a hand through his dark curls and giggled when they got messier than before.

When he was done, he looked up at you, still sitting in the same position, he asked,

"You can sleep here now, Remus will manage, or at least Sirius would be happy to share his bed."

You pouted again at his words, making him frown a bit.

"What happened now?"

"You won't kiss me?" Your question took him by surprise. He didn't expect you to say that.

"What do you mean?"

You tilted your head at side and said,

"You don't like me?" Your voice was small, making him feel bad.

"Is it because of my scars?" Your eyes were slowly filling with tears making James panic. He jumped up and sat beside you, and quickly took your face between his hands. You were slowly sniffing till then, making his heart hurt.

"No darling, why would you think that?"

"My previous boyfriend left me because of that, didn't he?"

James pursued his lips at the thought of your previous boyfriend, remembering how heartbroken you looked that day.

"It's not because of that, love. It's because you are drunk." You scrunched your nose at his words and said,

"Did you just quote those stupid clichè books?"

He raised an eyebrow and said,

"I do remember you loving those cliche books."

"But, I want you to kiss me now." You said while your lower lip jutting out.

"How about, I kiss you in the morning?" He said with a hopeful look on his face.

You whined at his words,

"But James, I am sober enough to remember this."

He sighed in defeat knowing how bad it can get. After a while he said,

"Okay, so I will give you a peck on your forehead right now, then in the morning, I will actually kiss you?" That seemed to work and you quickly agreed. So that night James kissed your forehead and made you fall asleep. And still in your sleepy form, you actually told him how you felt for him,

"You are so gorgeous James."

Bonus:-

When you woke up the next day, you found yourself reliving all those things you did the night before and it certainly didn't help with your headache. You got up from the bed, trying your best to escape before things could get more awkward.

You almost reached the door when someone said your name,

"Y/N?"

You cringed, totally aware of the person to whom the voice belonged.

You turned around and came face to face with your worst fear. You opened your mouth to say something but he cut you off,

"Don't worry, everyone is downstairs. You were sleeping, so I thought it would be better to leave you. I didn't want you to commit an arson as soon as you woke, I have seen the way Moony gets if you wake him up early."

Suddenly there was an awkward silence settled between you two as there was nothing else to say. You clutched your head to stop the throbbing pain in your head.

James noticed this and made you sit on his bed. When you did, he took the spot beside you and handed you a vial. You looked at him confused, the he explained,

"Hangover potion, er—we kind of need it really often." He rubbed the back of his neck, embarrassed. You tried to stop the smile forming on your face and drank the potion.

"Y/N?" He asked, his voice soft, full of warmth. You hummed, your heart beating wildly in your chest.

"Did you mean everything you said last night?"

You turned to face him, only then realising how close you two were. You started feeling lost again in his eyes, so you just hummed.

"Even about the kiss?" He whispered.

"Even about the kiss." And just like that his lips were on yours, moving gently and slowly, afraid that this moment might get lost if used in heat.

Your lips parted after what felt like an eternity, but even that didn't seem enough. He rested his forehead on yours then he said,

"You are so gorgeous, my love."

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