#Alfie is Hera’s favorite peacock

[idk-ig]

The younger Olympians GC

Dad’s Fastest Swimmers (& Heph) is the name.

The group chat with Ares, Athena, Hephaestus, Apollo, Artemis, Hermes, Dionysus, and Aphrodite. It’s the younger Olympian chat.

Athena had to swear an oath on the Styx to never speak of it or anything in it without permission from every other member in the chat before she was allowed to join. Curiosity got her to agree.

After a few weeks of her being in it, they realized that they had nothing to worry about. And that their oldest sister was 1) f***ing hilarious and 2) not nearly as devoted to Zeus as they had thought.

Athena was released from the oath a month later.

Actually, this chat has done wonders for everyone’s relationships with each other because it’s a bonding experience.

The chat is kept as an utmost secret and nobody outside of its members knows it even exists. Zeus would probably be extremely paranoid and thus furious if he found out about it. Poseidon would probably find it hilarious, though.

Apollo named it. Obviously.

Aphrodite knows about this chat but since she’s not a sibling, she wasn’t allowed in it, initially. But she cited the fact that in some myths, she is a sibling and they decided to roll with it. She was a great addition.

They use it to speculate on the elder Olympians and just to let people know things. There isn’t anything in there that would warrant Zeus’s suspicion but it’s Zeus, so…

Hermes: meeting in 20, Z pissed

Hephaestus: wonderful

Athena: what about?

Hermes: no clue

Aphrodite: bet Hera found out he was having an affair 🙄

Ares: nah

Ares: prolly woke up with no hair or smth

Apollo: maybe he woke up with clown make-up and he’s too embarrassed to ask who did it but too upset to let it go

Ares:

Literally everyone else:

Artemis: that’s oddly specific

Or

Dionysus: so, what would happen if there was a rager thrown in Hera’s gardens last night while she was visiting Oceanus and Tethys?

Dionysus: and now the east quad of lotus flowers have been crushed and Alfie is still high 12 hours later?

Dionysus: hypothetically

Hermes: …how…what…why…?

Artemis: how did Alfie even get drugs?

Apollo *at the same time*: I thought the ediles were the peacock treats!

Artemis: …

Apollo: I wonder what I was eating

Hephaestus: is that why I couldn’t find them!?!

Aphrodite: you were at the party 😱

Hermes: you do edibles!?!

Hephaestus: no, Mother asked me to look after Alfie while she was gone so I went to check on him this morning and I couldn’t find the treats

Apollo: oh

Artemis & Aphrodite: Apollo, eww

Apollo: they kinda tasted good ngl

Dionysus: CAN WE FOCUS ON THE PROBLEM?

Ares: you are screwed, what’s the problem?

Dionysus: if I tell her it was an accident, do you think she’ll spare me?

Athena: Zeus has tried that with her many times in the past and it hasn’t worked before so I don’t see it working now

Athena: like when she first met you

Everyone: 0w0

*later*

Dionysus: guys I’m getting a summons from Hera…

Apollo: good luck, soldier 🫡

Aphrodite: it was nice knowing you

Ares: we’ll make sure there’s some lotuses on your grave