#Alexander siddig had to do all the work in showing how much Julian was Going Through It

[tpolsleftear]

all these julian bashir accounts and not a single post of disney prince bashir

[peppernickel]

Listen, I love him, but I hate that DS9 never, not ONCE, let Julian Bashir cry or talk about how much life was weighing down on him. They kept piling trauma onto him and then were like “yes you WILL hold it all in and be depressed”. Let him cry!! Give him a hug!! What do you want me to think!! That the only hug he ever got was from Kukalaka!! Is that what you want!!

[chamomileteainabuttercup]

I find it a little bit odd when people write Steddie posts as if the way Steve and Eddie interact onscreen is something the actors made up and pulled off without the Duffers’ knowledge or against their wishes, because that’s not really how making a TV show works. I don’t know if it’s just a humorous exaggeration because it’s fun to feel like it’s all subversive and stuff, but like, when people talk about how much of Eddie’s characterisation comes from Joseph Quinn’s choices about body language and facial expressions and tone of voice and touches of improvisation (“big boy”), how little of that is in the bare bones of the episode scripts that have been released, I mean, that’s what actors are hired to do. They help bring the character to life in those ways and unless the production is going really badly they’re doing it in collaboration with the writers, directors and so on (the same thing in the case of the Duffers), rather than working against them.

There are limits to how much they can work against them, anyway; the main example that comes to mind from my own fandoms is from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine when Alexander Siddig hated the choice to make his character Julian Bashir secretly genetically augmented, because he felt it drastically retconned what had already been established about the character, and that it was an attempt to make Julian more popular by giving him traits of a much-loved character, Data, as if he wasn’t good enough as he was, and it just pissed him off a lot, but the most he was able to do about it was to try to say Julian’s lines about it in a rather flat and uninteresting way.

We already know that the Duffers originally wrote Steve as a true asshole who was going to sexually assault Nancy and die. Based almost entirely on Joe Keery’s vibes they took him in a completely different direction. I obviously don’t think every writing decision they make is right (they killed off Eddie for goodness’ sake, and what the heck is up with the pacing of the last two episodes and that two day time lapse, and what are they trying to do with poor little Will, and where is Dr Owens supposed to be now?), but that was an outstandingly good choice that led to one of the most popular and lovable characters they’ve got. They let actors do this stuff. I suspect they encourage it. Robin’s lesbianism pretty much came from Maya Hawke’s suggestions! She was originally supposed to have a genuine crush on Steve! Presumably making Eddie all sweet and goofy and flirtatious came from Joseph Quinn in a similar way and he was permitted to do it. If “big boy” wasn’t okay with them they wouldn’t have used that take. If it was a problem that the actors kept staring at each other’s lips while talking, they’d have been told “his eyes are up here.”

I’m not attempting to argue that the romantic/sexual subtext between Steve and Eddie was an intentional choice by the Duffers for which they should be given credit, because I don’t think it rises to that level, but I do think it’s clearly not something they minded or that the actors somehow snuck in. That’s all.

[kiranxrys]

Alone Together Episode 1 Transcript - Alexander Siddig & Andrew Robinson

I hadn’t seen a transcript for this episode going around on Tumblr yet and I thought I would quickly make one to share with anyone who would prefer to read or wants to read along/revisit the first episode in text form (and the YouTube subtitles are mostly useless, annoyingly). Please let me know if you think I’ve made an error anywhere and I’ll amend it!

watch: one | two | three | four

read: two | three | four

ANNOUNCER (ON-SCREEN): ‘Alone Together’ - a DS9 companion, Episode 1 - ‘These Days’. It has been about 25 years since the Dominion War ended. The Federation isn’t quite the same. Starfleet is much more consistently militarized these days. Earth may be paradise, but humanity is less ideologically empathetic. Since the recent Romulan attempts to extinguish synthetic life by infiltrating Starfleet Command, benevolence is taking a backseat to security these days. 

Elim Garak has been Castellan of the Cardassian Assembly since the new order was established following the Dominion War. Garak, of course, also has direct control over a newly resurrected Obsidian Order, though not by title. 

Julian Bashir is still a doctor on Deep Space 9 but is also coordinating the activities of Section 31. What we’ve learned is that upon sharing a consciousness with Luther Sloane using stolen Romulan technology, his genetically enhanced brain committed much of what he learned to his eidetic memory. That information had to be contained but could be put to good use. He was given little choice in the matter. Maintaining his cover as a Chief Medical Officer in the Bajoran sector met his needs, and he saw no reason to change.

[fade to black]

JULIAN BASHIR (VOICE ONLY): Mission log, stardate 737114. I’m approaching Cardassia Prime in response to a rather enigmatic request for medical aid from Castellan Garak, the leader of the Cardassian government. Though it’s hardly surprising that Garak might be withholding information, it seems that a reunion of sorts will be forthcoming. I’ve left the Infirmary in the capable hands of Doctor Jabara while I’m off the station. I must admit, I’m not entirely sure what to expect. 

JULIAN (ON-SCREEN): Bashir to Central Command, I’ve just entered orbit of Cardassia Prime, requesting approval to transport to Cardassia.

ELIM GARAK (VOICE ONLY): Stand by, Doctor. Don’t be in such a hurry.

JULIAN: Garak. I didn’t expect you to be at the Central Command, it’s good to hear your voice.

GARAK: My dear doctor, are we starting the lies already?

JULIAN (LAUGHING): It’s true, Garak. It’s good to hear your voice! That’s not a- Look, more importantly, if you’ll grant approval I can beam to your current location.

GARAK: Doctor, I’m not at Central Command. I’ve merely intercepted your subspace communications link. Unfortunately, Doctor, the Federation will not be setting foot on Cardassia today, and, to be quite honest, you don’t want to be here.

JULIAN: Garak, your message suggested some urgency in my arrival. Quite frankly, what the hell am I doing here if I can’t beam down?

GARAK: Would you uh- [laughs] believe pure, unadulterated nostalgia?

JULIAN: Would you?

GARAK (ON-SCREEN): [laughs] I missed you too Doctor. So, how is life on the station?

JULIAN: Well, Bajoran fashions just aren’t the same since you left.

GARAK: I’m sure.

JULIAN: But much of life has returned to what it once was, as much as it ever could, I suppose. Now-

GARAK: I was sorry to hear about Dax.

JULIAN: Thank you. I um… I miss Ezri every day. Ten years. I, well, that is- we, Dax and I, we tried to make it work. I- I was so happy Dax made it back to Trill on time. Cairn and I, we were very different people. He’s a botanist – can you imagine? Dax as a botanist. I suppose it’s why Keiko didn’t seem to mind my business as much. She and Dax had so much to talk about but, well, once the Symbiosis Commission discovered our continued relationship, well, we just uh- we couldn’t-

GARAK: Doctor, there’s no need to explain.

JULIAN: No. Dax always encouraged me to talk about my feelings, though there’s not much else to say, really. I had never really considered being in love with another man, but it was Dax. Ezri, Jadzia, even Cairn, it was Dax, is Dax. But we- we just couldn’t- I didn’t-

GARAK: It is difficult to find a good counselor to sort out our deepest sorrows these days.

JULIAN: I suppose it is.

GARAK: You’re an honourable man, Doctor. You loved Dax, you could do nothing less than your heart demanded. I know the pain of love all too well, especially a love that has everything working against it.

JULIAN: Ziyal.

GARAK: Ziyal, yes. Yes, even exiles have hearts, Doctor. Even [laughs] Elim Garak. When it comes right down to it, he has a heart as well. In fact, my heart is partially the reason why I’m here.

JULIAN: So, this is a house call? Damn it, Garak, why didn’t you tell me on subspace? What- what are your symptoms? Why don’t you want me to beam down?

GARAK: Well, so many questions, one hardly knows which to answer first.

JULIAN: Your symptoms, Garak. What is wrong with your heart?

GARAK: Well, it’s not just my heart, Doctor. Actually the most concerning symptom seems to be a degenerative condition that causes the ill to be especially susceptible to suggestion. Luckily my infection is relatively new, and rather unexplained as my exposure to the public tends to be limited to state functions and the like, you know, the life of a politician.

JULIAN: The ill? Garak, what are you saying?

GARAK: A virus, Doctor. Cardassia appears to be facing a- a minor health issue. We’re trying to contain the infection to one region, but we may have moved… far too late.

JULIAN: A minor health issue? You are a champion of understatement! ‘The ill’ suggests that this isn’t just about you but your ability to hide the facts seems to have been tainted over the years.

GARAK: Doctor?

JULIAN: Since your speech at the Lakarian City memorial, the ridges on your neck have grown paler and your breathing rate has increased.

GARAK: You liked my speech?

JULIAN: Damn it, Garak, you contacted me! How is this the first time that I’m hearing about this? Why is the planet not being quarantined? Your message said ‘medical aid’ – I assumed that I was just coming here as a preliminary consultation having something to do with one of your colonies. Now it sounds like an outbreak that needs to be contained.

GARAK: Doctor, quarantine means announcing the problem to the galaxy. This is an internal matter. You obviously don’t appreciate the severity of this virus, but you needn’t worry – no one is allowed to leave Cardassia, no one is currently being permitted to enter the atmosphere.

JULIAN: I cannot imagine you can contain the population without a reason. Just how bad is it?

GARAK: Oh, I’ve given them a reason, Doctor, but you shouldn’t worry about that. There are more important things requiring your focus right now.

JULIAN: Of course. How much- how many are infected?

GARAK: At last count, the virus had been contained to three continents. Nearly 68% of the population in those regions has been infected.

JULIAN: And you call it a ‘minor issue’ Garak?! That’s a pandemic!

GARAK: Doctor, when I say that the ill have developed a degenerative condition, I speak specifically of their thought processes. It is true that we have determined that it is a virus – a biological contaminant of sorts – but the Central Command is hardly a healthcare organization and while the degeneration is affecting the cardiopulmonary system as well, all of the symptoms seem to be driven by misfiring neurons, and therein lies the problem.

JULIAN: A virus that affects the brain is no small problem. The fact that early infections are showing in terms of dysfunction relatively mild systems doesn’t mean people won’t start to die.

GARAK: Yes, Doctor. And I haven’t.

JULIAN: My God, Garak. You’re infected.

GARAK: Why do you think I contacted you? I want the best.

JULIAN: And hoping that my genetic enhancements will allow me to diagnose your symptoms without scanning equipment?  

GARAK: I really have missed your mistrust, Doctor. The physicians here have the tendency to avoid the necessary dispassion for harder truths. You, however, have a refreshingly forthright bedside manner.

JULIAN: Wow, a compliment. You must be neurologically compromised. Well of course, of course I’ll do everything that I can. Do you know anything more about the virus? How is it passed on? How does it proliferate in the body? Have your doctors attempted any therapies that show any promise?

GARAK: Well, it seems to take several days to propagate in the carrier. During that time, sufferers develop a rather serious cough... [inaudible] …the dispatcher reaches the brain so our assumption it that it is spread through the air. Most hospitals have been closed to all but the infected to try and control the outbreak. As a result, our doctors are learning from their patients as they are treating them. As it stands now, they can only treat symptoms. Medical staff is reporting to external bodies to ensure that anyone studying the infection isn’t also battling a neurological disease. Progress is limited and all too slow.

JULIAN: Garak, I’m not sure how I can help you if I can’t examine you or access your data.

GARAK: Doctor, I’m afraid I can’t allow you to put yourself at risk. After all, I’m counting on you to save us all. And I believe that an outside perspective may be exactly what we need.

JULIAN: So no pressure?

GARAK: You’re a bright man, Doctor – put that genetically-enhanced brain of yours to work.

JULIAN: Well, I can’t examine you from orbit. My shuttlecraft sensors may be able to me that you’re alive, they can isolate you for transport, but they can hardly determine more than the most modest of life signs, and while I can see outward symptoms, Garak, I can’t for the life of me figure out how to see through your skull. I suppose I could transport a tricorder down there for a preliminary scan.

GARAK: I’m afraid I can’t allow that, Doctor.

JULIAN: Oh, of course you can’t. Can you send me your most recent medical scans?

GARAK: Unfortunately, no.

JULIAN: And why not?

GARAK: All of my genuine medical records are routinely deleted and replaced with falsified data. All data rods in which those records once existed have been destroyed, all computers in which the data rods were placed have been vaporized. My dear doctor, I’m the leader of the Cardassian people! Especially now, I can’t afford to broadcast my weaknesses to all, to anyone who feels they could exploit them.

JULIAN: The more things change, the more they remain the same.

GARAK: Meaning?

JULIAN: A presumption of godliness, most certainly a great paranoia. You haven’t managed to find yourself a staff that you trust to protect your life. To be quite honest, I’m surprised your staff doesn’t have implants that allow you to control them.

GARAK: Oh, Doctor, your assumptions hurt me deeply! Of course they do. If news of this infection gets out, and I can’t be clearer than this, Cardassia will be devastated. And we won’t be the only world that will fall.

JULIAN: Garak, you seem to believe that I can cure this virus from orbit, without any information.

GARAK: Well, Doctor, this virus doesn’t only infect the average citizen. Everyone is at risk. Everyone – the government, the military. Imagine if only a few of their people were infected. They find it difficult to concentrate. They’re finding themselves susceptible to suggestion. And what if intelligence agents of foreign governments found their way to Cardassia during this crisis?

JULIAN: It could destroy the Cardassia you’ve been rebuilding for over two decades.

GARAK: Yes.

JULIAN: But quarantine would keep foreign nationals off-planet and keep the rest of us safe from infection, assuming it can even infect off-worlders.

GARAK: Again, Doctor, it would announce the problem before we have a solution.

JULIAN: But it could help produce the solution you so desperately need!

GARAK: The risk is too great, Doctor.

JULIAN: Garak! Lives are at stake!

GARAK: Hundreds, perhaps thousands, to save billions. Doctor – will. You. Help. Me?

JULIAN: First and foremost, I’m a doctor, Garak. And I’m your friend.

GARAK: Yes. One more thing we should keep to ourselves.

JULIAN: You know Garak… you are being more paranoid than usual. You remind me of the exiled tailor I met so many years ago.

GARAK: Ah, but as you said yourself Doctor, the more things change-

JULIAN: The more they stay the same. But Garak, so much has changed. You’re the leader of your people.

GARAK: Julian… let’s drop the pretensions, shall we?

JULIAN: Whatever do you mean?

GARAK: You know that I have rebuilt the Obsidian Order, and the reason that I know that you know is because I know that you are working for Starfleet Intelligence. Your posting at Deep Space 9 is merely your cover. Why would a religious sanctuary like Deep Space 9 need a doctor of your capability, with such a limited Starfleet presence? I must admit, you have done an excellent job of obscuring your intelligence role.

JULIAN: Dear, dear Garak. Have you been keeping tabs on me? I suppose of all people you would be the only person I might be able to trust with such information. Assuming any of your conclusions are true. But Starfleet still has a presence and Deep Space 9 is still a major way station for commerce and diplomacy in the Bajoran sector.

GARAK: Of course you can trust me with sensitive information Julian-

JULIAN: [chuckles]

GARAK: -at least until there’s a reason you can’t. Oh, but let’s hope it never comes to that. I do like you; I did from the very beginning. You may be my only true friend. Since Mila’s passing, our all too infrequent exchanges have been my only respite from a world without trust. The political world on Cardassia deplores a vacuum and the old ways are clung to, even after the war. It took me years to bring Cardassians around to another way of thinking. The arts are celebrated, the people are fed. Life is no longer a struggle, but… paranoia is rampant once more.

JULIAN: Then I suppose you’ve been the ideal leader.

GARAK: Well, I do appear to have the appropriate skill set and experience, yes.

JULIAN: You could always go back to being a plain, simple tailor.

GARAK (LAUGHING): You would be surprised by how many of my old vocations I still dabble in. I’ve even taken up taxidermy! Yes, it’s true! But stuffing a tribble isn’t as challenging as perhaps a six-legged [uncertain] marsupial, but it passes the time. And so many wonderful things fit inside an animal that need only trill to appear alive.

JULIAN: [laughs]

GARAK: But as you said Julian, you are my friend, and one of the things I learned from working in the Obsidian Order under Enabran Tain, was that friends are a liability. Enemies are easy. Friends… friends are the challenge. When I was his protégé I had a job to do, relationships were tools to achieve my objectives. I don’t have time for friends, I don’t have room for emotional attachments.

JULIAN: And then you were exiled.

GARAK: And then… I was exiled.

JULIAN: I had no idea.

GARAK: About what?

JULIAN: Am I your only friend?

GARAK: Well… the only one living.

JULIAN: You said that your cardiopulmonary system seems to be demonstrating symptoms consistent with this neurolytic virus.

GARAK: Mm-hmm.

JULIAN: I need to at least access the database being used by the off-site researchers working on a cure.

GARAK: I’m sorry to disappoint you, Doctor – I’ve never been an ideal patient, as you well know. But while I trust you, I cannot risk any access that Starfleet Intelligence might have built into your shuttle.

JULIAN: Garak, you’re tying my hands. Do you have access to a medical scanner? Can you scan yourself?

GARAK: I’ve been a tailor, a gardener, a spy, who’s to say I’m not a doctor as well?

JULIAN: I suppose stranger things have happened.

GARAK: Oh, a shapeshifter saved the galaxy by going for a swim, a Starfleet captain turned out to be a god, a Cardassian legate turned out to be the devil, you were married to a woman three centuries your senior – stranger things, my dear doctor, happen all the time.

JULIAN: You may have a point. Although to be fair, Dax is three hundred years older, not Ezri. Ezri was several years younger than me.

GARAK: Semantics, Doctor.

JULIAN: Ah, here we are.

GARAK: I’m sorry?

JULIAN: I’ve created an encrypted backdoor to your central database.

GARAK: Ooh, of course you did. Yes, but it won’t help you. Our researches are working in a closed system, it is impossible to access their research through the central network.

JULIAN: Damn it, Garak, I’m trying to help you! I encrypted the access, there was no danger to you or you people! I used a fractal regression to develop access points at either end.

GARAK: And I sincerely appreciate your efforts, Julian. That’s why you’re here. And of course that is why I am convinced no one else will be able to save us.

JULIAN: I cannot do this without any information about the pathogen. And even the smartest person in the galaxy would be hard-pressed to develop a cure to an unknown virus quickly enough to prevent its spread or knowledge of its existence to the outside world.

GARAK: I have faith in you, Doctor. And to put your mind at ease, you should know that very few citizens on Cardassia are even aware that they are infected. And I’ve committed the Order to a substantial misinformation campaign to keep it that way.

JULIAN: How long do you expect that to last? The longer the infected believe that they’re free to live their normal lives or even to travel to and from health centers for treatment for whatever malady they believe they have, the faster the real virus will spread.

GARAK: Well, it seems its symptoms vary in their intensity. The cough can be persistent or periodic. And when that initial symptom passes, the neurological symptoms cause sufferers to present a variety of ailments. It is only those doctors who discovered the virus and were subsequently visited by some associates that are aware of the larger problem. And they are the very physicians currently researching the virus on my behalf.

JULIAN: If you are able to contact them then there’s no reason that I can’t access their data!

GARAK: Doctor, we’ve been through this.

JULIAN: Garak, we’ve been through a lot of things!

GARAK (LAUGHING): Yes.

JULIAN: You didn’t call me here to explain Cardassia’s post-war isolationist bureaucracy!

GARAK: [laughs]

JULIAN: I came because a friend in need asked me!

GARAK: You didn’t know why I called you, Doctor. So please, don’t offer me your selfless pretense.

JULIAN: Pretense?! You think after all this time your lives and deceptions would keep me from helping you? I can tell when you’re lying Garak, and you know when I’m telling the truth. I promise you that no one will ever know about your role in the cover-up of the virus, at least not from me.

GARAK: I… I want you to set course for the southern polar region of Cardassia Prime. The magnetic interference will make it more difficult for prying eyes to access your subspace signal. You’ll find that my alleged paranoia has a purpose. 

JULIAN: Computer, set course 118 mark 72.

COMPUTER: [chimes] Acknowledged.

JULIAN: Engage at one-quarter impulse.

COMPUTER: Course laid in. [chimes]

JULIAN: My signal was encrypted from the very beginning. I assume the same is true of the signal you used to isolate and redirect my subspace carrier wave. Isn’t it a little bit late to begin worrying now, Garak?

GARAK: Our signal may be secure between one another, but any system can be breached given enough time and expertise. And what I have to tell you…

JULIAN: Just tell me, Garak. I’m over the polar region as you asked.

GARAK: Yes, so you are, so you are. Now, good, wait- wait… Good. Now that we’re comfortably alone, let me ask you this: do viruses normally pop up undetected in a population with little to no prior warning? And how many unknown pathogens exist in a planetary ecosystem with our level of technological development?

JULIAN: Well, to be quite honest, pathogens can unexpectedly adapt or cross species barriers. Centuries ago on Earth, industrial pollution led to a climate change which in turn caused previously isolated microorganisms to be released into the biosphere.

GARAK: Yes, you truly have an answer for everything.

JULIAN: It comes in handy. But I suspect you’re going somewhere with this so please, continue.

GARAK: Our research has found some… peculiarities in the viral RNA, and admittedly I don’t understand all of the specifics, but, to put it bluntly, the virus has been engineered. I’m sending you two images of the viral RNA we’ve discovered. The images are all that I can risk sending you now. If you can find the source, you may find a cure. Alternatively, if a cure was not developed… you can avenge my death.

JULIAN: Not currently one of my skill sets, Garak. But why the pretense? You could’ve told me this immediately- actually, don’t answer that. I’ll need some time to do an analysis of this to determine what might work to counteract the viral infection. Annoyingly, there is no systemic treatment that I can even begin to research without knowing the underlying cause. But over the last twenty-five years, you must’ve made all sorts of new enemies. According to the latest intelligence, the only dangerous political intrigue is coming out of the Romulan Empire these days.

GARAK: Yes, well, leading a government comes with its own risks, to be sure, Doctor. But why do they have to be new enemies? Of course the Romulans have never been great fans of mine – I mean I left their embassy’s grounds-keeping staff so many years ago. Oh, those poor orchids, they’ll never be the same. And there’s always Kai.

JULIAN: The Kai.

GARAK: Ah, Kira- Kira, dear Kira’s never been a fan of mine.

JULIAN: We both know that Nerys would have never worked this slowly if she wanted to kill you.

GARAK: [laughs]

JULIAN: And she would only kill you. But Nerys is hardly the same person since she left the militia to join the Vedek Assembly, and now that she’s the Kai, this level of genetic manipulation would have to accomplished by someone with intimate knowledge of the Cardassian physiology as well as the capacity to evade security of your medical system.

GARAK: Yes, although like I said, it is an internal Cardassian matter. I’m sure there are plenty of elder Cardassians who would enjoy watching my life come to an end from torture. Dukat’s father- I mean, uh… [laughs] to one kanar-induced tryst with the man himself, to finally becoming involved with Ziyal, and whatever else-

JULIAN: Wait- wait, wait, wait you- hang on, you- you and Dukat?

GARAK: Ooh, yes. Surprising, isn’t it? Yes, two nights, maybe, before my exile, I’d been feeling quite powerful. I wouldn’t have normally lowered my guard even among my fellow Cardassians. Dukat was enjoying his second bottle of kanar, was looking for someone to blame for his most recent failures to overcome the Bajoran resistance, and there I was. He promised my death from across Quark’s bar. Later that evening he found his way back to my table to apologize – uncharacteristic, absolutely, to be sure. But kanar can do that to a man. We stole away to a quiet corner on the second level to talk, and then we found our way to an unoccupied holosuite.

JULIAN: I don’t know what to say.

GARAK: Well, I don’t need to tell you, Doctor – it was an unplanned direction for my evening to take. And suffice to say it didn’t soften Dukat’s general opinion of me. [laughs] He did keep his distance for a long time afterward.

JULIAN: So, that story had a happy ending, if you’ll pardon the pun.

GARAK: Pun?

JULIAN: Uh, it- it’d be funny on Earth. Though tragic, too – sort of like a sad clown, really. Miles will love it.

GARAK: Doctor, could we perhaps find out what is slowly eating away at me before revealing my darkest secrets to Professor O’Brien over an ale.

JULIAN: Of course, of course. I think the first step is to cross-reference known immunogenic agents that could have been introduced into your system. Even if the virus is a new pathogen, its mode of infection could be a million different things. You should review your schedule and try and determine an environment over which your control was limited, a place where the food and drink could’ve been tampered with or perhaps a place where you could have been unexpectedly exposed to an air assault. But… about this dalliance with Dukat-

GARAK: Oh Doctor, please. Provincial human attitudes aside-

JULIAN: Of course.

GARAK: -your species didn’t always have synthehol, and every species seems to go through a period of poor choices. Believe it or not, Cardassians are a passionate people, a people who yearn to find joy wherever it may lie. And remember, that we were in the midst of a Bajoran occupation and there wasn’t much joy to be had for those of us assigned to Terok Nor. Decades later, my reforms are helping to shape a modern Cardassia.

JULIAN: Understood. Though I take exception to the word ‘provincial’.

GARAK: Oh, of course you do. Now, let me take a look at my agenda… According to my doctors, I could have been exposed more than a month ago.

JULIAN: A month? Well, you certainly waited long enough to contact me.

GARAK: Well, well we do have doctors on Cardassia, and I wouldn’t be much of a leader if I didn’t look to my own people before seeking outside assistance. However, I’m not naïve enough to trust them completely. And what kind of leader would I be if I did?

JULIAN: Fair enough. I need to get some biometric information, please, from you if I’m even to begin researching cures. Can you transport yourself to a hospital with proper scanning equipment that I can access?

GARAK: Oh dear, I- I- I can do better than that, Doctor. I can do better than that. My residence is equipped with some of the best holographic technology in the quadrant – what type of equipment do we need?

JULIAN: I didn’t realize Cardassia had made such strides in holography.

GARAK: Oh, the technology is Federation, actually. Cardassian engineers build wonderful ships, but their work with artificial intelligence isn’t what it should be. Political life has its perks – I even have an EMH.

JULIAN: Well can I talk to him?

GARAK: Doctor, he’s obviously offline during this crisis. We’re wasting time better spent on the issue at hand! Now shall we begin?

JULIAN: Alright. Well the first thing we’ll need is a standard biobed with-

GARAK: Doctor, doctor, wait- I’m detecting a coherent signal directed at your shuttle. Yes, the magnetic currents over the poles should’ve obscured your presence. We may have a problem.

JULIAN: Hang on, it looks like an encrypted subspace signal… but I can’t determine the origin. Stand by, I’m trying- it’s… it’s from Earth. Well, I think I’ve got it. One moment… Jake?

[fade to black]

[CREDITS]

[traincat]

I've never watched deep space nine and I gotta ask. Is it as gay as that gifset makes it look?

I started to write this reply and then got overwhelmed because the answer is yes and no, when it comes to Garak and Bashir, the characters you asked about, but mostly definitely yes it is, as doubled down on by this recently aired footage.

Star Trek: Deep Space 9 is a show from the 90s and so it falls victim to a lot of problems that most media from the 90s does, but it does have an openly bisexual character named Jadzia Dax, who is a joined member of a symbiotic alien race and has had both male and female past lives. In an early episode, she gets Long Black Veiled and put on trial for a crime she could prove she didn’t commit – but she’s unwilling to use her alibi, which is that her past life was with the wife of a close friend at the time. Mid-series, there’s an entire episode devoted to her reuniting with the new host of the wife of one of her past incarnations. 

The relationship is taboo, but not because both current hosts are women -- it’s taboo because in Trill society, it’s against the rules to reassociate with previous lovers. Jadzia is vibrant, flirtatious, hyper competent, and has on screen relationships with both men and women, and I love her dearly. 

But to address the two characters this ask was sent in about -- Julian Bashir, the show’s Chief Medical Officer, and Garak, an enigmatic exiled member of the alien Cardassian race with a deeply checkered past -- it’s hard to know where to begin. The two share an important relationship throughout a large part of the show, despite the fact that Garak is only a supporting character. (His stellar screen presence always, for me, makes him seem like much more of a main cast member.) Their first meeting has plenty of sexual tension, with Garak approaching Bashir like he wants to eat him up. This isn’t an accident; Andrew Robinson, who plays Garak, has gone on record that he approached the scene from the point of view of thinking Bashir is very good-looking and deciding to just go for it. (Andrew Robinson has been very open in interviews about how he views Garak’s sexuality and how that factored into his performance.) So from the first scene, there is definitely that note of sexual tension between them that never quite goes away. In later episodes, Garak appears in Bashir’s bedroom in the middle of the night as a prelude to carefully coaching him through a tangled web of diplomatic intrigue involving a war orphan, Bashir fights to save Garak’s life, an incident at the end of which they tenderly clasp hands while Garak asks Bashir to forgive him for his various crimes, and when trapped together on a prison ship they have to work intimately together to escape, despite Garak’s debilitating claustrophobia. In the novelization of one episode, Captain Sisko silently compares Bashir having to leave an apparently dead Garak to the time he had to leave his own wife’s body during the cataclysmic space battle that precedes his time on Deep Space 9. In short: it’s a lot.

Bashir and Garak aren’t a canon couple -- after season 5, the show starts to pull away from this relationship quite a bit, probably because of, you know, all of the above. Bashir’s heterosexuality is clumsily enforced after this point (and then undermined again by his relationship with another older man in his life, who he at one point exchanges sentiments with that while they love their significant others, they like each other just a bit better, Trek, please). Garak still has some very good moments -- I especially love his parts in the finale, and in an episode called In the Pale Moonlight, which tackles the harsh reality of wartime and ethics. (Deep Space 9 is a very good show, especially regarding its larger war narrative.) That said, in the very last episode, they do get a touching parting moment as they go their separate ways, both expressing in their own ways the hope that they might meet again. 

But remember how I said Andrew Robinson has been very open about Garak’s sexuality? Well, he also wrote both a novel about Garak called A Stitch in Time, which I haven’t read yet, because it will destroy me, but which is presented as a letter from Garak to Bashir, and a play called The Nexus, which he and Alexander Siddig, who played Bashir, used to perform at cons before Paramount apparently banned them. Why? Well, in the post-series play (which there is now a transcription and script available for online!!), part of the plot involves Garak and Bashir repeating “I love you” to each other in various intonations. That’s a literal thing that happens. So they’re not a canon couple within the bounds of the show, but it’s hard to deny with all the supplementary material that the feelings themselves aren’t canon. 

[widgenstain]

i hope this doesnt sound creepy but what were your thoughts on submergence? I love reading movie reviews/rants about my faves (jamesy)

Lol, no,not creepy at all, I wanted write a few words after I saw it two weeks (?) agoanyway, but got distracted. I hope this doesn’t disappoint you though! Not so many positive opinions here!

(light spoilers under the cut)

The best word to sum up my feelings about this is“meh”. I expected the worst after reading some reviews but it wasn’tTHAT bad. It wasn’t good either though. I felt pretty vindicated in myassessment from January 2016 ; Submergence isn’t abook that translates well on screen. And they didn’t even try very hard. Boy, thatscript is bad…

Sceneslifted directly from the book that anyone with even the tiniest understandingof how good narratives work would have changed, or at least tried to make morefilmable. Instead we got this mess; long, clunky, scientific dialogue thatworks as a build-up in the book but needed to be cut short in the movie andmore importantly: focussed on the message and motives behind it! What does it mean to behuman, to live in certain social structures and how insignificant are we andthose social structures really in the big picture? You don’t have to explain the layers of the Ocean if you can’t get across how vast they really are and what that vastness is meant to symbolise! 

Thedirection doesn’t clear anything up either. It’s so inconsistent in its levelsof subtlety. Especially in the parts that take place in France it needed to be waymore obvious; what attracts these two people to each other? THE importantquestion in a romance!

In the bookit’s intellectual understanding and fascination with the other person’sapproach to topics like love, death, religion etc.. I wasn’t kidding in my earlierpost when I said that in the book they aren’t really characters, but voices for differentworld views that somehow still see their similarities and learn from eachother. The whole thing is supported by their weirdly intertwining heritage andlife story; she’s a biracial cosmopolitan who explores the seas his ancestors sailed,before he became a spy in Africa, who’s deeply involved with Eastern Africanconflicts.

In the movie?Yeah, that first part doesn’t come across whatsoever. They try, but it’s fartoo subtle and the script doesn’t capture the differences/similarities at all. Theyprobably realised that, so they added a lot of sex scenes instead. I was veryworried for them but they’re actually fine.They’re notreally well-matched physically, James looks way older than Alicia (well, he is,widge) but they do have chemistry. Is it the chemistry the movie needs though? No,it’s not.

I totallycan see them as two people who met at a nice hotel on the Atlantic coast and thought“hey u cute!” “hey, u cute too, let’s have some really good sex since we’reboth people who are so good at sex.” And after the three days, they went their ways andmaybe thought of each other during a wank session or two.

It’s notthe chemistry of a couple where he thinks of her in the worst moments of his lifeand she in the most triumphant yet terrifying ones. 

As for the intertwiningheritages? They actually wrote, shot, edited and left in a scene in which hetalks about her being such a “mongrel” of Swedish and Australian heritage. Noone in that whole process noticed the disconnect or the freaking white-washing!Wim Wenders deserves a few punches in the nuts for that.

As for theacting, yeah… I’m not a fan of Alicia, there I said it. I don’t subscribe tothe hate the Fassbender fans/haters/toxically obsessed creeps (who keeps upwith this these days?) throw at her but I sincerely do. not. understand. how shemade it as far as an actress as she has. 

Still, she is ok in this, she showsmore than her usual three expressions and some actual emotions. That doesn’ttake away from the fact that she acts in scenes, not in movies. She’s onecharacter in one scene, another in the next. It - weirdly enough - works bestin the sex scenes where they allowed her to be an unusually tomboyish character,not the ultra-feminine seductress you’d expect in such context. She feels more or less natural and ok in them.

She’s farless believable as the career-driven and respected-by-her-peers scientist andit’s the absolute worst in the “phone” scenes. To be fair the script fucks herover in these as well, turning Danny, a stoic woman of science about to go onthe biggest adventure of her career, into a bawling teenage girl, who’s upsetthat the guy she had really good sex with doesn’t reply to her calls. 

A betteractress than her would have struggled with that garbage too, but with her scene-actingit really feels like you’re watching someone completely different each time. Addthe gloomy goth girl rambling about suffocating in really inappropriate momentsand you’ve got your stitched together Frankenstein character.

James of course knows how to portray a coherent character, but he isn’tat the height of his game either in the beginning. He’s a bit stiff, the whole spy stuff is thankfully short because it feels like an artsy-fartsydirector trying and failing to do James Bond, and the scenes in captivity would have hit much harder if you’d gotten WHY he adores her so and whispers “OH DANNY” all so dramatically.

I mean, I get thatmovie!James is trying to hang on to his sanity as best as he can, but why think of that random girlhe had really good sex with in France? Why not his mother, his best friend or, ffs, his housekeeper in Nairobi he’s known for more than 3 days?! The film doesn’tget this across and it’s sad (I’m also convinced the editor hated them. Herflashbacks show him squinting unattractively and his flashbacks show her from areally unfortunate angle.)

However, hisacting is top notch in the pivotal scene when movie!James’ captors send him into thewater to shoot him. It starts out all dramatic but then he takes it and turnsit into this absolutely painful, human moment where he yanks the audience’sheart out and crushes it like he’s wont to do. Man is he good. From that on Ilike the movie. 

The interactions with the doctor (helloooo Julian Bashir, didn’tknow you were in this!) are the best scenes in the book as well and they’reexcellent. Nothing is black and white, how different can the lessons differentpeople take from the same situations be, etc.? It’s great.

Except whenthe movie suddenly throws all subtlety overboard. There’s a scene where a womangets stoned and instead of focusing on the fucking amazing acting that goes on onJames’ and Alexander Siddig’s faces it has to ram the pointhome with the silliest effects. It’s such a waste of two excellent actors with an amazingly uncomfortable chemistry. 

Still, the scenes with the extremists are awesome. Too short and I don’t think the movie audience really gets how intriguingReda Kateb’s character really is, but they’re part of a movie that could havebeen great. Pity that wasn’t the whole movie.

I was a bitconfused after Tiff last year where Wenders said that he changed the ending butI don’t think he really has? Both are open in ways, but not really. I liked theending in the book and I liked it in the movie, super kitschy lifetime movieshots of Danny aside.

Anotherpositive thing I noticed was the light. Whoever did that really understood whatto do with the beautiful people in front of the camera and how to tell thefreaking story. I swear, the light on her face as he leaves the hotel, in hisprison and in her sub does a far better job at connecting them and explainingthe motives than script and direction together! I hope that light person got paid a ridiculously high amount of money and gets to do more movies.The script person should find another day job though and Wenders should stick todocumentaries from now on.

In short:Meh. Not gonna buy the DVD but maybe will check it out another time when/if itcomes along on Netflix and see if my opinion changes.

[salaciouscrumpet]

I’ve been bingeing Star Trek: Deep Space Nine on Netflix lately. I watched it 20+ years ago (dear god) when I was a geeky little 15-year-old with a massive crush on Dr. Bashir (Alexander Siddig has only gotten hotter with age; my crush remains unabated, although now I’m old enough to find Bashir a little bit annoying, especially in the first few seasons). I’m one of those people who doesn’t feel the need to choose between Star Wars and Star Trek; I get a lot out of both and think they both bring a lot to the table with regards to entertainment value, social commentary and escapism.

As I apparently ramble a lot about this, more below the cut. Oh, and spoilers for a 25-year-old show, I guess.

Two things, though.

One, which holds standard to pretty much any drama I’ve binged: Watching a bunch of episodes back-to-back makes you realize just how much friggin’ trauma the characters go through. Like, just using my space-BF Bashir as an example, the man is constantly threatened with torture or death, is frequently assaulted (often as a result of one of Quark’s plans falling through), is forced to kill people he knows (or at least Mirror Universe versions of people he knows), is made to perform dangerous/invasive/unethical procedures (on people he cares about, no less, but given his professionalism and high moral standards that’s only slightly relevant), is kidnapped or held captive on multiple occasions (including spending, like, a month in an internment camp where he spends time in solitary -- and don’t even get me fucking started on how his friends respond to him when he returns and they realize they’d been interacting with his Changeling doppelganger the whole time he was missing!), and then has his worst secret revealed, which threatens his military career, his medical license and his personal autonomy. One or two of these things, alone, would be traumatic enough, but throughout the seven seasons of the show he undergoes enough horrific misadventures that he should, by all rights, have gone completely insane. (And people say I’m mean to my characters. I mean, I am, but still, now I know where I get it from!) This is just one character.

Two, taken from my currently viewing the Mirror Universe episode of “Through the Looking Glass”: we get to meet Mirror!Bashir, who is one of the leaders (or hotheads, it’s hard to tell at this point) of the Terran Rebellion. But ... um ... why? How? If, in this universe, humans are slaves and have been for ... kind of a while ... (like, since shortly after Kirk visited in the universe in the original series), how would Bashir’s parents have had the wherewithal to have their son genetically enhanced? Shouldn’t he be -- by Julian’s own account in “Doctor Bashir, I Presume?” -- severely developmentally, physically and intellectually delayed, with the approximate development of a 6-year-old? (And therefore most likely dead, since this universe doesn’t exactly seem like a supportive environment.) Or was Mirror!Bashir born without these disadvantages? Or did his parents somehow, magically, have the means to have their son enhanced? I know that the decision to have Bashir genetically enhanced (yes, like Khan) was a last-minute one (literally: Siddig got the script, with the big reveal, about two days before they were about to film; he had known nothing about this character “development” the entire time [this was a fifth-season episode, by the way!] he’d been playing Dr. Bashir), but man, does this ever highlight that.

Okay, another thing: the first-season episode “The Forsaken” was cringe-worthy. Watching Commander Benjamin Sisko -- an amazingly well-written, compassionate and brilliant man -- write off Constable Odo’s concerns regarding Ambassador Lwaxana Troi’s sexual harassment as a joke was horrifying. “Haha, Odo, maybe you should just let yourself be caught, you might like it. Don’t cause any troubles, Odo, she’s an ambassador, we don’t want to have to deal with it. So sorry her rampant sexual interest in you makes you uncomfortable, Odo, but I can’t and won’t help you.” The fact that Troi and Odo do eventually get along quite well (and that she proves to be a supportive friend) doesn’t make up for how awful it was to see Odo’s very obvious discomfort and unhappiness dismissed, and it was made worse (for me) because it was Sisko, a character I deeply respect, who did the dismissing.

I’m honestly tempted to do a thorough analysis of all the trauma Bashir experiences throughout the seven seasons. (I could do it for all the characters, but damn, that’s a lot of work.) And I know other shows, movies, novels, comics, etc. put their characters through an equal amount of hell and it’s just made obvious for me right now because I’m watching a bunch of episodes back-to-back, but damn.

And, uh, I didn’t really have a point to this except that I’m enjoying re-watching a series I loved as a teenager. The acting was phenomenal (not just Siddig and Brooks, who are fucking treasures, but everyone; there is no one on this show where I don’t have a moment of “Fuck, that was amazing” at least once or twice). The morality was complicated and complex. The heroes didn’t always win, the bad guys didn’t always lose, and sometimes people did the wrong thing for the right reasons and it still didn’t work out in the end. Fuck, I loved this show.

[weerd1]

Star Trek DS9 Rewatch Log, Stardate 1908.31 Supplemental: Missions Reviewed, “In Purgatory’s Shadow” and “By Inferno’s Light.”

(Note: given that these are really one two-part episode, the description and review will be handled as one story.)

Kira is helping Odo return his shape shifting environments to his quarters when both are called to Operations. A coded Cardassian message has been broadcast through the wormhole. Sisko asks Garak to decipher it, and the tailor tells him it is just an old planetary survey. Bashir then intercepts Garak on his way to steal a Runabout. The doctor takes Garak to Sisko, and Garak reveals this is without a doubt a message from Enebrain Tain, Garak’s mentor presumed killed in the ill-fated joint Cardassian/Romulan attack on the Dominion. To Bashir’s surprise, Sisko approves a mission to track it down…but with Worf as Garak’s escort. 

There are specific instructions to NOT engage the Dominion. As they prepare, Gul Dukat, still in his fugitive Klingon Bird of Prey, comes to the station to visit Ziyal. He is horrified that a relationship is developing between his daughter and Garak, and blames Kira. He tells Ziyal she must return to Cardassia, but she refuses, saying she will wait for Garak to return from the Gamma Quadrant. 

Now on their voyage, Garak convinces Worf they can get closer to the likely source of the transmission by passing through a nebula which should obscure their position. In said nebula though, they find they are not alone…a fleet of Jem’Hadar ships is also hiding there, striking distance from the Wormhole. Worf and Garak are captured and taken to a small asteroid with a Dominion prison, manned by Jem’Hadar and administered by a Vorta, they do in fact find Cardassian and Romulan survivors from the attack, including Enebrain Tain. Tain is dying, but admits to Garak he is glad to see him, as well as admitting the younger man is in fact Tain’s biological son. Worf meanwhile finds the real General Martok (whose replacement died earlier this season in “Apocalypse Rising”) and finds the Jem’Hadar have been fighting him for sport. They are glad to have a new Klingon to add to the fray. As another surprise, a Starfleet Officer is taken out of solitary confinement and thrown into their quarters: It is Doctor Julian Bashir, who has been here for over a month. 

They decide Worf’s fighting will distract the Jem’Hadar long enough to allow Garak to continue Tain’s work tapping into the comms section deep in the base’s walls, and he can call the Runabout to beam them out. Problem is, Garak is claustrophobic, and it is increasingly difficult for him to do the work.

Back on DS9, listening stations in the Gamma Quadrant start going dark, and Garak and Worf have not reported back; Sisko reports to Starfleet that a Dominion attack may be imminent. They come up with a means to seal the Wormhole, but when it is implemented, Changeling Bashir has sabotaged their efforts and they instead make the passage more stable as dozens of Jem’Hadar ships enter the Alpha Quadrant. The Defiant, the Runabouts, and Gul Dukat move to intercept, but the Dominion changes course away from them, heading for Cardassia. Gul Dukat has negotiated with the Dominion and had been made ruler of Cardassia in exchange for Cardassia joining the Dominion.  In the prison, Worf continues to fell Jem’Hadar, but is getting weaker and more injured with each opponent.

 Garak is doing his best to fight his own demons and get the message out. Dukat promises to “make Cardassia strong again” and uses the Jem’Hadar fleet to kick all Klingons out of Cardassian space, and vaporize all Maquis colonies. The Klingons under Gowron gather at DS9, and Sisko pushes him to reassert the Khitomer accords so the Federation and Klingons can stand united. Dukat messages Sisko to tell him that ALL former Cardassian holdings will be retaken, including DS9. The Federation and Klingon fleets are joined there by a surprise Romulan fleet as the Alpha Quadrant pulls together to defend against the Dominion. Changeling Bashir steals on of the Runabouts and begins heading off in another direction. Worf meanwhile is now fighting the lead Jem’Hadar in the prison, and though repeatedly knocked down, continues to stand.

 Even Martok tells him that honor is satisfied and he should yield.  He will not, and this so impresses the Jem’Hadar First that HE yields, mentioning that he cannon beat Worf, he can only kill him. The Vorta orders them both shot, and as shots ring out, the Runabout’s transporters pull the prisoners away; Garak was successful. On the run, they message DS9 warning them about Bashir. As the station searches, they find a lone runabout flying toward Bajor’s sun, but the Dominion Fleet is arriving…at least that’s what sensors say. No one has visuals on the ships. Kira, commanding the Defiant, realizes it is a ruse, and risks warping toward her sun to intercept the runabout, pulling it away from the chromosphere as the ship detonates. The Changeling was going to set the star nova, destroying Bajor, DS9, and the combined Klingon, Federation, and Romulan fleets.  The day has been saved. Worf reunites with Jadzia, Garak with Ziyal, and Bashir with O’Brien, who realizes he should have known something was wrong when Julian became so much easier to get along with.  Sisko and Gowron agree there should be a Klingon presence on DS9, and at Worf’s suggestion, Sisko asks Martok to stay as liaison. He says he will be honored to work with Worf, and hopes to undo some of what his replacement has done. But at this point, Cardassia has become part of the invasion: The Dominion now has a foothold in the Alpha Quadrant.

Wow.  I mean wow. These two episodes could easily have been edited into a single theatrical release, as they have it all. Romance, betrayal, action, intrigue, and last minute escapes. Star Trek manages here to make up for the fact they wouldn’t let Worf when a fight for the first two seasons of TNG by making him the biggest badass in two Quadrants. The reveal of Bashir as a Changeling, and the reverse ramifications of that on the events of “Rapture” and “The Begotten” are horrifying, and well played by Alexander Siddig as the two versions of the character. Garak’s closing of his relationship with his father, while becoming closer to Ziyal is poignant, but his battling his crippling phobia to try and save not just himself, but his colleagues and even the Alpha Quadrant is carried off so well by Andrew Robinson. We have our third, final, and in my opinion best performer in the role of Ziyal, and Melanie Smith shows her care for Garak and her growing disdain and distrust of her father remarkably well. Kira in the command chair always makes me happy. (Hey CBS- how about Admiral or Kai Kira on “Picard” coming up, huh?) With these two episodes, the stage is set for the rest of this season, and honestly out to the end of the show as The Dominion is no longer a scary rumor or a competitor off in the Gamma Quadrant, but rather an enemy at the doorstep. As Sisko prophesized in “Rapture:” The locusts have come to Cardassia. The Alpha Quadrant, and this show, will not be the same from here on out.

NEXT VOYAGE: Now that Bashir’s back, Starfleet medical might use him as the model for a new medical hologram. But dark secrets in his past may end his career just as he plans to resume it in “Doctor Bashir, I presume.”

[heroesandvillainsofmbti]

DS9 MBTI: Doctor Bashir, an Introduction

One precept that DS9 set out to challenge from the beginning was the idea that characters on Star Trek couldn’t come into conflict with each other. This idea made it tough for the writers to create interesting stories, so on DS9, non-Starfleet and non-Human characters were introduced to spice up the mix. Doctor Bashir, however, is fully human (if a little enhanced), and though he’s idealistic as any Star Trek character, his youth and naivete actually served to make him the biggest jerk on the show.

He annoyed everyone for most of the first couple of seasons, until his natural do-gooder-ness began to mature. It was a risk the writers, and actor Alexander Siddig, were willing to take. Though some fans never overcame their first impressions, I think the gamble paid off.

And speaking of maturing, can we talk for a minute about how well Alexander Siddig has aged?

Wow. Just…(knocks back a drink)

Okay, on to the episode list.

Best Doctor Bashir Episodes

“If Wishes Were Horses” (season 1)

Fans generally hate this episode (almost as much as “Move Along Home”), but I think it’s a hoot (ditto “…Home”). If nothing else, it shows you Bashir at his absolutely annoying, immature worst, setting you up for the arc he would go through in the future.

“The Wire” (season 2)

This is the moment Bashir starts to grow up, and it’s arguably one of DS9’s best slow-burn dramas. He’s persistent but caring as he nurses Garak through the withdrawal from his implant, and sees all kinds of ugliness from his friend. I don’t know how you can still be annoyed with the doctor after this riveting hour.

(“Distant Voices” is Bashir’s only Season 3 ep, but I don’t think it works. We do get the reveal that Bashir intentionally missed his infamous exam question here, and I use the screenshot of the elderly Julian at his birthday party for many a birthday greeting.)

“Hippocratic Oath” (season 4)

After getting them to begrudgingly like each other, the writers threw Julian and Miles into conflict again. Bashir wants to help a group of rogue Jem’Hadar beat their white addiction, so that they can be free of Dominion control, but O’Brien has no patience or trust for their enemy. It’s a classic Star Trek ethical dilemma, with both sides making good arguments, and both making hard choices that leave you thinking.

“Our Man Bashir” (season 4)

A campy, DS9-style romp, this adventure finds most of the main cast turned into holographic characters in Julian’s James-Bond-style fantasy. This is just good fun, and it takes a nicely dark turn at the end when the skeptical Garak butts heads with Bashir over how to best survive the scenario without killing the others. The accents alone make this one worth watching.

“The Quickening” (season 4)

Season 4 was a great year for Bashir, especially after the dry (for him) Season 3, and this episode remains the quintessential Doctor Bashir story. The man’s trying to save an entire planet, working obsessively to find a cure for the Blight, certain that he’s the medical hero for the job. Good support from Jadzia, too, as the patient-but-wiser sidekick who helps him regain his perspective.

“Doctor Bashir, I Presume” (season 5)

A controversial character choice by DS9’s writers brought us the surprise reveal here that Julian Bashir is genetically engineered. They hadn’t planned it, but there are seeds of this throughout the series if you look for them in retrospect. Alexander Siddig does great work going through a whole range of emotions, from pride to shame to affection for his parents, who are played by a lovely pair of guest stars. The subplot with Rom and Leeta’s romance, with Robert Picardo visiting as well, is also a lot of fun.

“Statistical Probabilities” (season 6)

I have mixed feelings about the Jack Pack characters, but Bashir’s certainly trying his hardest to do good here in his work with these genetically engineered misfits.

“Chrysalis” (season 7)

If we didn’t have the Jack Pack, we’d have never had this lovely episode, one of Star Trek’s best romances. A superb guest turn by Faith Salie (who’s also doing fun work these days on NPR’s “Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me”) gives Bashir a chance at love at a time in his life when he finally isn’t desperately chasing every attractive woman in sight. Of course, he’s also trying to fix her, and he’s idealizing her beyond what she can cope with, but the chemistry between them is so cute and sparkling, you want it to work. I also read queer subtext into this episode when Bashir speaks about finally being able to love without hiding who he is. And that impromptu a cappella scene breaks my heart every time.

(I didn’t include Bashir’s Section 31 episodes, because that plot annoys me, despite William Sadler’s epically oily turn as the villainous Luther Sloan. “Inquisition,” from Season 6, is suitably mind-trippy and entertaining, if you want to catch it.)

[chamomileteainabuttercup]

Thoughts on Episode 4 of The Book of Boba Fett - "On Thin Fucking Ice"

that is not the episode title but it clearly should be

I obviously hope that last week's episode was an aberration and not representative of the series overall. For patriotic reasons, I would like to keep watching this (I mean Temuera Morrison), and for general Boba Fett-liking reasons, I would like this not to suck. So far, we have had one okay episode, one AWESOME episode, and one truly shit episode. It's not exactly encouraging to see a show run such a gamut in its first three episodes; it suggests poor planning and only erratic insight about why viewers will care to watch. I am hoping that this week will be okay. That's all I'm setting my sights on. Okay. Fingers crossed, eh.

The Disney+ blurb for this episode is just "Boba Fett partners with Fennec Shand," which might mean that we finally get some backstory/context for these two, or might alternatively mean that they will dance a fruity samba, and either is fine by me. We have a runtime of 49 minutes, in between the excellent 53 minutes of Chapter 2 and the okay/bloody awful 39 minutes of 1 and 3. I am not sure who directed this one but I hope it's not Robert bloody Rodriguez again.

* ugh taking us straight back to the worst part of the previous spisode in the "previously on"

* I really wondered if Boba's total lack of affect in the discovery and funeral parts of that sequence was some kind of actor protest by Temuera Morrison, like how when Alexander Siddig hated the genetic enhancement plot twist for Julian Bashir on Deep Space Nine (sorry about the spoilers for 1997), he would try to say any lines relating to it in the dullest way he could. The difference here is that I really liked that plot twist (and it did not do what Siddig feared, making Julian too similar to Data - they are both talkative and clever and neurodivergent in some way but have very different vibes overall) whereas this one sucked and made me feel angry and sad. To go right from an episode that was all about Boba finding a connection and a sense of belonging and purpose with these people after spending so long feeling alone, an episode to which Morrison clearly contributed a lot in terms of culture and the whole issue of indigenous rights and sovereignty which is dear to his heart, to then having it all ripped out from under Boba for cheap tragedy that dehumanised the people the previous episode did so much to humanise, surely was not very satisfying for Morrison as a performer. The man can in fact emote, and here he just didn't. So.

* remind us of the stupid briefing scene too

* Stephen Root: no one respects you

* Me: well to be fair, based on last week's shenanigans I don't either

* ugh the Mods

* ugh Krrsantan (it is not Krrsantan's fault he got put into such a stupid scene, he looks like a cool dude)

* ugh the rancor swap makes no sense, why would they give him something so expensive and fuck off without even getting their cool-looking Wookiee back

* they didn't recap the only cute and awesome part of last week, Boba "Horse Girl" Fett deciding he loves the rancor and it will be his baby

* and now... new material

* TRY NOT TO SUCK, SHOW. I AM SO READY TO BE PLEASED.

* ALREADY into the bath and a flashback? Without even a present-day prologue? Also, are they really going to keep using Boba dreaming about his past in the bacta tank every single time they want to do a flashback? Couldn't he talk to a therapist like Tony Soprano? I feel like this guy naps more than he works. Which I can sympathise with, but he could've done all this napping BEFORE trying to take over Mos Espa and started out feeling fresh.

* It was very green in the desert that day - oh wait that's a transition effect.

* okay, so Boba is apparently spying out Jabba's palace; are we actually going to start getting hints of why he decided to go back there? Is it about gaining the power to avenge the Tuskens, or what? Did his childhood experiences teach him anything about the value or likely success of trying to avenge someone you loved? Does he just think this is different because he's strong enough to do it by himself instead of being a traumatised little kid depending on adults who don't have his welfare at heart?

* "Not today, old girl" - okay, I like the continuing notes of Boba's quiet love of animals, but "not today" what. What is your objective, you potato.

* what do banthas eat? Apparently barbecue is okay. I always wondered, because they do look like ungulates, but you clearly can't graze in a desert. The food chain of Tatooine remains very fucking mysterious. I presume it involves, at some level, animals that literally eat and metabolise sand.

* nobody had better kill his fucking bantha this week

* okay, I briefly skipped to the end credits and the director this week was Kevin Tancharoen, of whom I know zip, nothing, nada. Back to five minutes in.

* it is too dark in this scene for me to have any blessed idea what is going on, and I would prefer unconvincing day-for-night to realistic can't-see-a-thing.

* So this is where he finds Fennec near death - which raises some questions for me about the passage of time. He fell into the Sarlacc's maw in 4ABY, and was presumably not in there for more than a few hours, by the state of him. The events of The Mandalorian begin in roughly 9ABY. How long did he live with the Tuskens before the cheap shitty tragedy? Clearly a while, since he learned their language, but nearly five years? How long did he wander around in between the cheap shitty tragedy and finding Fennec where Din left her in around about 9 ABY? You give a guy five years to noodle around in before he has to get back into the plot, and then you don't let him really noodle.

* there are people here with cool cyberpunk eyes - okay, so the whole cyborg body mods thing was a trend on Tatooine well before Boba met the Mods? What does it mean? Anything?

* "I found a gravely wounded woman barely clinging to life in the desert... so I brought her to a nightclub." At least that's what it sounds like.

* So wait, did Boba know that this was a place where people got cyborged up? How did he learn about that? Has he had any sort of social life in between the cheap shitty tragedy and this? Who has he talked to? Why did we skip over so much?

* Anyway I guess this is where Fennec's techno-tummy comes in.

* there were absolutely no emergency healthcare options other than this place? god Tatooine sucks

* and apparently Fennec doesn't need any anaesthetic or life support

* this just... this doesn't make sense

* I never cared that much about how the techno-tummy works, but this was just stupid-looking. There was no sign that this guy did anything about the blood loss she'd already suffered, no sign that there was any hygiene involved, working on Fennec's body this way would make sense only if she was already a cyborg or robot that just needed parts replaced.

* btw where did Boba get the money for this, what has he been doing to earn money? What have been his goals and uses for the money he earned? that seems interesting

* Like the way the Tuskens were so brutally disposed of, this rather feels like "We have to give some kind of explanation for how this character got their new accessories, let's bash it out real quick."

* "Aren't you going to close her up?" "And cover all that beautiful machinery?" SO EVIDENTLY INFECTION IS NOT A THING. PERITONITIS IS NOT A THING.

* what did the guy do with all the damaged innards he would have had to remove?

* so the poor cow wakes up on the sand in the middle of nowhere with some dude offering her a melon; I wouldn't be impressed.

* so... Boba went through her pockets and looked at her ID?

* so here's where the narration from the trailer came from

* One thing that I do find a little strange about Morrison's performance is the really different inflection he gives his voice when he says things like "I am Boba Fett, left for dead on the sands of Tatooine," kind of ponderous and artificial, and when he says things like "He's a tricky little bugger" and "What are we going to call you?" - when he actually sounds like a person. I can justify this as there being an element of Boba putting on a performance, which I think he always has been doing since he put on the helmet and started creating the character of Boba Fett the Bounty Hunter, who is clearly different from Boba Fett who just wants to pet a dog. Perhaps what he's giving Fennec here is a modified, helmetless form of that.

* Okay, Fennec introducing the possibility that at least some of the Tuskens escaped. I HOPE SO. It really didn't look as if there were as many bodies strewn about the destroyed camp as there were dancers in the bonfire scene at the end of episode 2. Fingers still crossed for Tusken Warrior and Tusken Kid.

* Right, and this settles the fact that, at least in this iteration of Star Wars canon, Boba calls his ship Firespray. I will gladly accept it as Boba changing the name of the ship when it became his; Slave One is really a bummer of a name.

* your ship is still where you parked it? are you sure?

* Boba. Baby, the worst he can say is "no, fuck off."

* I know this is turning into kind of a heist, and I've been vocal in my desire for heists, but it's not a very feisty heist.

* Fennec has a tiny baby drone! Okay, tiny baby drone is cute. I really like how it zips around.

* you're just gonna turn your bantha loose? Isn't she, like, domesticated? don't just tell her to go and get pregnant! she loves you!

* Fennec speaks for me, and for people with any common sense. Maybe hold onto your alternative means of transport just for now.

* How do you figure Bib double-crossed you, though? He kept your ship when he entirely reasonably believed you were dead. You haven't approached him to let him know you're alive because... you're afraid of what he might say? You think you're negotiating from a disadvantage? You can't even write the dude a letter to sound him out? Don't be a sook.

* tiny baby drone's back!

* so all you need to do is break into the garage and steal Fett's Vette, right?

* incidentally if Bib Fortuna kept security so tight, how were you able, not many months after this, to just walk right directly into his throne room so that he was surprised (and apparently pleased, until you shot him) to see you? And what did he think had happened to your ship in the meantime?

* it's almost lost because the lighting/colouring is so damn murky, but Fennec gives Boba an adorable smug smile about cutting through the bars to sneak in, and it immediately makes me like her more.

* "Voice of Sous-Chef Droid" would be a great credit to have on your IMDB page.

* General Grievous with cleavers - until Fennec takes his head off. I actually thought she was just going to push an off switch, which I would love even more.

* low comedy as Boba has to destroy the kitchen trying to tackle some little guy

* "Where'd you go?" - again, Boba sounds like a person when he's not sounding ponderous

* why are you telling the little droid who you are? why do you care? do you make this speech to everyone you meet?

* did that droid just do suicide

* I want - GONK DROID

* I want Boba getting back into his starship to be more of a moment, you know?

* sorry green piggy guard guy, you were certainy not paid enough for that

* of course she knows what she's doing, she's Fennec Shand

* She's in good shape - in fact, shipshape.

* and now, they are pals

* okay, so, bikies, zapping bikies

* that feel like vengeance?

* what are you going to do, shoot the sarlacc?

* are you literally going to shoot the sarlacc

* "that's where I was trapped all those years ago" - how have the years between then and now been occupied? because we really haven't seen enough!

* okay, Boba doesn't realise his armour was scavenged/salvaged

* what are you going to do, climb down in there with a rope and a torch?

* of course you can't see a thing! you're looking down an animal's throat underground! you don't even know how long its body is or how far along its gut peristalsis might have moved your armour by this time!

* that's right I said peristalsis

* I know a thing or two about guts

* not three things though, I top out at two

* this is simply silly, silly behaviour

* how is a ship that can blast off out of the atmosphere not grunty enough to escape the grip of an admittedly very large worm

* okay that was a fun sound effect, it always is

* okay, you know Fennec considers Boba her best friend now, or there's no fucking way she'd be hanging around to perform some kind of half-assed autopsy on a worm.

* okay

* okay sorry

* I know I'm starting with "okay" a lot

* but how screamingly absurd is it that Boba Fett is criticising crime lords for not taking the time to think

(and what happened to him is not because a crime lord didn't take the time to think, it's because Han Solo has the luck of the devil and also he, Boba Fett, is kind of a doofus)

* Boba "I didn't think to ask for a briefing on my new territory until like three days after I took it over" Fett

* Boba "I assumed everyone would just pay me tribute" Fett

* Boba "What's recruitment? I just hire disaffected youths I meet on the street" Fett

* Boba "I just sort of bounce around like a dumb pinball reacting to whatever people say" Fett

* Boba "I am surprised every time someone does something sneaky" Fett

* are you genuinely now trying to sell us on the idea that Boba Fett is a man with a plan

* that he's meant to be smart, smarter than the wiseguys

* Dunning-Kruger effect in action folks, except the show has Dunning-Kruger

* has anyone ever in the history of Tatooine before suggested that Tusken culture is soft

* was that literal entire episode a bacta tank flashback - oh okay, we have about a quarter of an hour still to go.

* how did he just walk in without encountering any guards that time, I ask you again

* he is completely healed? How long will that last, one wonders. He gets beaten up a lot.

* oh they're actually in canon called the Mods for goodness' sake, the silly nickname I made up for them is canon

* if Boba is completely healed (at least until his next ass-kicking) is he going to start sleeping in a big-boy bed now?

* Okay, at this point going to the pub is a reasonable decision.

* Krrsantan is not enjoying his evening. Perhaps Krrsantan should go to a movie or something instead.

* I'm complaining a lot, but Boba looks really handsome and I enjoy looking at him looking handsome.

* Garsa is gesturing a lot. Like, almost mind trick levels of gesturing.

* Okay, so I guess Krrsantan still has a bar tab.

* MAX REBO EVERYONE

* Boba, sweetie, darling, last week he (apparently) crushed your spine and bit your hand. He clearly has tremendous anger management issues. Do you really want to call him "mate" and offer him a job? Why not ask Garsa to help you, given that she is actually intelligent and knows people and also already technically works for you as your vassal?

* "when Fortuna claimed to be the heir" - "no right to the throne" - anyone remember Rotta? Jabba's little punky muffin? the actual legitimate heir?

* the idea that Boba got past "guile and treachery" to take out Bib Fortuna is just... absurd. They're having to retcon what was only written as a brief post-credits stinger in which Boba walked right in unchallenged, Bib simply appeared surprised and pleased to see him, and Boba shot him at point-blank range while his guard was down! That or Fennec is just bullshitting because it's the only way to sell this pup.

* "draining Tatooine of its wealth" - what wealth, when the most valuable commodity on the planet is water and the spice is imported? (It's a bit like how, although you can make meth pretty much anywhere with very basic kitchen/lab equipment, the cost and risk of importing the precursor chemicals to New Zealand is such that it's cheaper to just import meth ready-made these days.) Like, we know there are mines on Tatooine, Mos Pelgo is near one, but what they mine is unclear. (I'm ignoring here whether there's EU material that specifies what you mine on Tatooine, because none of that counts until we hear and see it on screen.)

* The rancor is under the table - and either that's a different droid of the same make and model, or that wasn't a suicide earlier.

* Don't just call the rancor "boy"! I demand that you give the baby a cute name!

* Okay, Matt Berry Droid is interpreting, so Matt Berry Droid is a protocol droid, right?

* Why should they join you? You're the only person the Pykes want to attack. They all probably have deals with the Pykes.

* "then I'll do it alone," he said, like a big, brave, dumb, stupid idiot.

* "just pwease don't betway me!"

* BOBA YOU SUCK AT NEGOTIATING SO BAD

* again and again I keep waiting for a twist that shows you're playing dumb... but you're not playing, are you?

* are we really supposed to think Boba pulled something off here

* all he did was get a bunch of dirtbags to make a promise I am sure they feel no obligation at all to keep

* "my deal is a lot better" - what deal?

* "what I'm short on is muscle" - which I don't understand why you didn't begin recruiting much earlier on, and no, the Mods don't count!

* and Fennec... introduces to him the idea that you can, like, hire guys to fight for you? Why was that even written as an exchange between these two characters in particular? "Credits can buy muscle if you know where to look" - "bitch I know, I was muscle for like 25 years." Why would they need to say this to each other. Why. This is "As you know, your father - the king..." levels of cruddy exposition.

* Well. Okay, well. I got my wish. That episode was at the low end of the range I would call "okay." It was pretty dumb throughout but it wasn't actively offensive or distressing. I did not have to look at stupid space Vespas. Ming-Na Wen made a cute face and Temuera Morrison looked hot.

* It still felt like a half-hearted exercise in filling in gaps, moving from one already established point to another as quickly as possible, rather than anyone actually being excited to show us what Boba Fett got up to in his wilderness years (other than in episode 2 which shone precisely because it felt interested in what was going on).

* The thing is, with this show, they got the opportunity to do what fanfic writers do, but with the real actors and budget and facilities. I mean that as 100% a good thing. To flesh out an enigmatic character, to develop an interesting story that was going on in a backwater while the eyes of the galaxy were understandably turned elsewhere, so they have lots of freedom to improvise. What do they actually want to do? I get what Temuera Morrison wants to do and I'm cheering for him, but what John Favreau and Dave Filoni want to do with this is really not clear to me.