#Achilles comes back a happier man and zag immedaitely starts asking for the dirty deets

[jacqcrisis]

Hello! Sorry, yet another person here to absolutely fawn over your fallout au, which I finally just finished. I've really enjoyed reading through all of the tumblr posts all morning, I had a thousand qs I'd ask about the characters and story if I could but just… WHY IS NOBODY TALKING ABOUT PAT AND ACHILLES. How do they find out. Is Hermes just like "yup, guess we should go back to see Achilles" one day and Patroclus is like "Hold up what the fuck did you just say"?

Anyway I appreciate this story ended a while ago and you're probably out of charmes inspiration these days so don't worry if you have nothing to say, I am going to go and stare into space and think about Charon and Hermes smooching instead of doing my day job thanks

A) thank you so much for all your kind words, including your comments. I'm just very bad at responding to those but I am grateful and extremely happy you enjoyed my stuff!

And b) while I am burned out of Hades content, you did unfortunately activate my trap card that is talking about sad old ghouls and centuries long pining. So I'm using this as an excuse to detail how Achilles and Patroclus finally meet each other once again.

So, after everything in fallout au, Zagreus starts what I like to call the White Boy Soul Search™. He runs away from Asphodel and his father several times in order to try and find out more about himself and who made him (Persephone) all while the dynamic duo of Theseus and Asterius are tasked with bringing him back (which they succeed several times cause, listen, Zag did beat the mutant in a 1v1 but they are still an ex-Brotherhood Paladin and an ex-Unity Nightkin tag-teaming dragging an android man back to daddy).

On these travels, Zag meets up with Hermes quite often, as Hermes is secretly checking up on him under the guise of 'haha wow we crossed travels again, cuz! Crazy, amiright haha'. At one point early on, Zag laments how his power supply seems to run out so quick and he just can’t understand why but if he could fix that, then he could continue his investigation longer while leaving the guards tailing him in the dust. Hermes, upon hearing this, is all too eager to drag him off to go see the friendly neighborhood android doctor, Pat, who welcomes them in with less than enthusiastic arms. 

Now, Zag has, in the past, read most if not all of Achilles' journals he keeps around in his private rooms, and is well versed in his personal history and his long lost love he still dreams of and sees false images of in the crowds at the arena. So when Patrolcus introduces himself with that long dead lover's name, while also being a ghoul, Zag starts to get curious. While Hermes is off getting bullied by goats and a rooster, Zag starts asking questions as Pat is looking him over: what'd you do before the war, where were you stationed, what have you been doing since, anyone you miss from that time?

Pat is dodging all of these as he has always done, but just as he's wondering if he should force a sleep cycle on this new synth, Zag just comes out and asks if he knew anyone named Achilles. That's a name Pat hasn't heard in decades, one even he doesn't dare to speak aloud and, as you would expect, he drops whatever he's holding. He assumes he misheard, but when Zagreus clarifies that he knows a ghoul named Achilles who writes often of a Patroclus he knew before the bombs dropped, Pat forcibly enters him into sleep mode.

When Zag awakens, his power supply problem has been fixed and, in payment, Patrolcus demands he leave and never speak about this 'person' again as it is impossible his Achilles survived the bombs, suffered from ghoulification, and lived for as long as Pat has. By his words, it is cruel to string a old man along like that with the hope such a person could be alive only to dash it once its revealed he's speaking of the wrong person. Zag tries to argue but Pat is adamant and sends him and Hermes on their way, considering the topic null and void.

So Zag goes back to town, heads directly to Achilles, and tells him about Patroclus, expecting at least one of them to be happy to hear about the other. Achilles indeed is, in disbelief and elated beyond measure Patroclus is alive but that happiness fades. There’s a sadness to him as Zag describes Pat’s condition and reaction and, when he suggests Achilles go and see him, Achilles refuses, stating it's for the best he stays away.

It takes a while for either of them to budge. Achilles is wracked with guilt over having abandoned Pat during what could have been their final moments, and the idea of seeing him again, and seeing what would be justified anger and hatred at his actions, would be too much to bear. Patroclus, on the other hand, refuses to believe this Achilles is the one he knew, that upon seeing this person, that being faced with one final confirmation that his Achilles is dead, it’ll become all too real for his steadily declining grip on reality. They’ve both spent nearly two centuries mourning someone and neither wants to have that festered, scar reopened, to go through it all again.

Eventually, Zagreus appeals to a sense of catharsis in Achilles, that perhaps apologizing, even if it's to a closed door, will bring him some peace. So he agrees to go without Zagreus as this is something he needs to do alone, and after a boat ride and a long lonely walk with his thoughts, practicing an apology over and over again, he finds himself at the quaint isolated farm. At the sight of a man across the fields tending to his crops and his animals, Achilles nearly turns right back around, centuries of guilt and grief and hope hitting him like a freight train.

He doesn’t get to as some of the goats spot him, bleating and tottering over to the frozen ghoul in their curiosity, alerting their master to the visitor’s presence. Patroclus moves closer, not recognizing the person standing among the tall grass, about halfway to his homestead from the fence, with his hand on the pistol at his hip. He calls out as he continues to step closer, tells the ghoul he doesn’t take in wanderers and the stranger will need to move on now if he wants to avoid the deathclaw’s sunset hunting hours.

They've both changed physically, recognizable features sloughed away as their skin and soft cartilage dried and fell off throughout the years but one thing that hasn’t is the way Achilles says Patroclus’ name, choked in disbelief and a reverence that carries unaltered by the breeze. It’s Patroclus who stops in his slow approach, hand falling from the pistol and the breath knocked out of him. Achilles takes a cautious step forward, saying something but Patroclus doesn’t hear it, falling to his knees as he begins laughing.

He’s certain he’s finally lost it, that the radiation burning away at his brain has finally done its job, that this is some hallucination, and as Achilles comes to his side, touches him cautiously, his laughter turns to weeping. He falls into Achilles’ embrace, assured by the physicality of it that this is real. That’s he’s real, that he’s alive, oh God, he’s alive and has been just a few days' travel away for years...

It’s happiness. It’s guilt. It’s mourning once again, but this time not someone lost, instead years, decades, centuries wasted alone when it could have been together.

But, as a similarly crying Achilles promises, that doesn’t matter. There’s explaining to be done, apologizing to be had but they’re together now. They have time now and he’s not going anywhere this time if Patroclus doesn’t want him to.