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#ANYWAY DOCTOR VENTI 😳😳
tomaytow · 2 years
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unlabeled
— doctor! venti/reader
“…Fine. Sorry, Doc.” You yelp in discomfort when he starts to clean your face aggressively with the wet cotton ball. “Hey! Be gentle!! O–Ow! It stings, you know?!”
He chuckles. He sends you a small smirk, “My warrior is still a baby it seems.”
or: you’re reckless and venti is not having it.
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You can already feel a scolding incoming when your ears pick up the familiar footsteps approaching your room. Adjusting your jumpsuit and brushing a bit of your hair to look at least decent—though you’re positive that you look like a huge mess—the door finally opens. 
“Goodness me,” you quickly glance away from the vanity to see your assigned doctor entering your quarters. He closes the door as he puts one hand on his hip. He scans you up and down disappointingly, “[Name]… What happened to you? Oh dear. Come here.”
You oblige from his wishes and take a seat on the bed. You avoid his gaze shamefully as he starts pulling out the bandaids, alcohol, and cotton balls from his gladstone bag. “How utterly reckless – how many times did I tell you to be more careful? You have more scratches than before.”
The bed creaks when he sits beside you. A warm hand caresses the side of your cheek, turning you so you can face his evident worried expression. (His concern for your well–being makes your heart do tons of somersaults, even if this is like, the umpteenth time he has visited you.)
Still filled with embarrassment, you refuse to meet his vibrant, enchanting green eyes so you opt to focus on his braids instead. 
However, he did not like this at all and sighs. Your chest flutters when his thumb rubs your supple skin slowly. The doctor leans in and whispers in your ear, “Look at me when I’m talking to you.” 
(Yep. It definitely sent shivers down your spine.)
You shut your eyelids for a moment, to at least regain your composure and prepare yourself, before finally lifting them up. 
Archons. He’s still gorgeous as ever. 
His hair is still majestic with the split ends he garnered the whole afternoon, and his white coat, though wrinkled, makes you want to smoothen them out. Or not. It still looks good on him. 
You’re aware that you’re not the only one the doctor has to take care of, and yes—as much as you hate to admit it—you’re not the only one attracted to him.
That’s why you sometimes wish you’re that high up enough in the ranks to let him be your personal doctor.
So you can have him all to yourself. (You guess that you have to train more, then.)
Wait.
No.
You shake your head frantically.
That is so not professional. 
“…Fine. Sorry, Doc.” You yelp in discomfort when he starts to clean your face aggressively with the wet cotton ball. “Hey! Be gentle!! O–Ow! It stings, you know?!”
He chuckles. He sends you a small smirk, “My warrior is still a baby it seems.”
You immediately burn up from the my. My warrior? Seriously, this doctor that you have… “N–no, you did it on purpose! What did I even do to you to deserve this kind of treatment?”
When the doctor puts the dirty cotton ball away and begins to unpack the bandaids, he rises his chin up and he scoffs, “Well, first of all – I know that you’ve been too hard on yourself. Tiring yourself, overworking yourself… You’re even skipping meals and your sleep! Ah, ah, don’t give me that. You can’t lie to me. I’ve heard from the others.” Then, he huffs, and presses the bandaid on your cheek hardly, making you wince. (Your head even bobbed from his sudden force!)
“Second! Recklessness. Stubbornness. I appreciate your fighting spirit, [Name], but you’re getting way overboard! Not everyone can keep up like you, and you’ll have to remember that you have your limits, too! You just don’t know when to stop, huh?”
You argue, “I need to get stronger, it’s essential for my—” but you don’t continue your statement when he narrows his eyes at you as a warning. He lightly touches your lips with his index finger, shushing you.
“Shh.”
You gulp nervously from the contact.
“…And third, didn’t I tell you to call me Venti when we’re alone?” his words soften, and you feel yourself heat up when he discreetly slips one of his delicate hands into your rough, patched ones.
Ah yes.
You briefly remember that one time when you were at a much worse state, to the point that you cannot even stand up due to the exhaustion and how wrecked your body was from the rigorous and intense training you pushed on yourself. 
When Venti saw you, you would never forget how he dropped all the things he had in his arms and anxiously rushed you to the infirmary. He was so upset that the enthusiastic doctor revealed his tears to you for the first time.
The only way you managed to calm him down was when you called for his name weakly, shocking him, and then reassured him that you were okay. (You would be okay.) You gave him additional comforting touches to remind him that you were still alive – that you were still breathing whenever you saw him shake when he cured your injuries.
Then the rest was history.
Maybe.
Venti presses closer. Fresh cecilias flood your nostrils and he kisses your cheek through the band aid as an apology, before detaching himself from you to stare at you fondly. “Always making me worried… you better make it up to me, love.”
You both still didn’t know what to call your relationship with one another. 
But you do know that he cares for you so so much.
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pocarinapyon · 2 years
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[🤪] Overpowered Reader Giving Nicknames to Genshin Boys
Reader is isekai'd to Genshin Impact (Teyvat) and realize they're overpowered as f*ck.
As a big fan crushing on the boys, they brand them cute/weird nicknames. Because why not? It's not like the boys could kill you if you give them silly tags!
** Reader does not have a romantic relationship with the boys
Starring : Aether, Albedo, Albedo (Primordial), Arataki Itto, Baizhu, Bennett, Childe, Chongyun, Diluc, Gorou, Kaeya, Kamisato Ayato, Razor, Scaramouche, Shikanoin Heizou, Thoma, Venti, Xiao, Xingqiu, Zhongli
Warning : 🤪 crack (I think); random nicknames; reader being a bully (Diluc receives most of the bullying); reader implying they know the characters well to the point the character gets curious/suspicious; implied that some words or implication of words don’t exist in Teyvat yet (ex: bae, sugarbaby, etc.); trashtalk; shit tons of littered references (too many to list – if you know, you know); pinch of cringy pick-up lines and suggestive content; etc.
Also, my bias is showing here, lol!
Links : Masterlist
Content format:
[Guy Name]
-> [nickname] - [guy's reaction and interaction with him]
Target audience is gender neutral.
To whoever is reading, I hope you enjoy as much as I did!
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AETHER
-> Eater - *Paimon: It’s pronounced as ee-ther, not eeter!* *you explain you decided to call Aether as EATer because he likes food a lot* *You: Although who doesn’t like food, right?* “I guess you thought that way because you always see me with my emergency food.” *Paimon: Hey!!*
-> Master Chef - “Master Chef…” * You: Yes! Oh great Master Chef, please bless me and Paimon with your delicious food! I have much ingredients.* *Paimon: Oh! I’m excited! [Your name], Paimon guarantees the food will be delicious!* “What kind of dish did you guys have in mind?” *Paimon: Paimon is thinking %!*
-> Sora – “😕? But…I am Sora.” *you explain about a Keyblade-wielding boy named Sora who ventured across different worlds to search for his friends* “Oh… I see… I hope he was able to find his friends.” *You: He did! Although that’s another story – and a lengthy one at that. As in seriously lengthy…and it’s all canon…with a bunch of twists and backstories… Anyway, I hope you find your sister too.* “Thank you.”
Note : In Japanese, Aether is called “Sora” by Lumine (Hotaru).
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ALBEDO
-> Albaby - “Albaby? That's quite an affectionate name, isn't it?” * You: Do you like it?* “I think I would prefer to be called just Albedo.” * You: Okay. If you say so, Just Albedo.*
-> Bae - “Hmn... Bae? It's alright. I think it's better than Albaby.” *You: Really?* “Yes.” * You: (Lol, success! Albedo doesn't know what Bae means!)*
-> Boyfriend – “Oh dear. It would surely cause an uproar if people heard you calling me boyfriend.” * You: But since it’s just us in Dragonspine, there won’t be an uproar. Right, boyfriend?* *Klee: Wow! Mister Albedo has a sweetheart?!* *Klee looks back and forth at you and Albedo with googly eyes* *You: Hi, Klee!! 🤩😍! Yes, I am Albedo’s sweetheart.*
-> Geoculus - “Why would you call me a geoculus?” *you explain that is because he is a Geo Vision wielder and a synthetic human* “😳... So, you are aware of my homuncular nature... Fascinating… I'm curious. May I know how you learned of it? Were you able to observe it?” *You: I'll tell you if you kiss me.*
-> Jekyll - “It is a rather decent name (even coming from you). Is there any specific reason why you want to call me Jekyll?” *you explain the story of Strange Case of Doctor Jekyll and Mister Hyde; Jekyll is Albedo and Hyde is Primordial Albedo* “So even that information did not escape you. 🤔... Are you perhaps a clairvoyant? Or perhaps you are like the traveler? But I still wonder how you learned all these information.” * You: Look, Jekyll. I’m not gonna give you answers for free. And it's gonna cost more than a kiss if you want to know.*
-> My Prince - “Hmn... One of the titles I have received is Kreideprinz, as in Chalk Prince. However to use a possessive pronoun – oh. You don’t seem to be listening.” *just stares at Albedo* * You: I love you, My Prince.*
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ALBEDO (PRIMORDIAL)
-> Black Frost – “😐? Aren’t you supposed to give me a name?” *You: Yes. Black Frost is a name.* “Doesn’t sound like a name to me.” *You: It is! He’s actually pretty cute! Violet hat. Red eyes. Wide toothy smile.* *Primordial Albedo is not convinced Black Frost is a name* *You: Wait, let me try to draw him for you…*
-> Hyde – “I am not interested in any more names.” * You: But isn’t being Hyde better than pretending to be someone named Albedo? Imagine having your own identity. Your own self. Something that belongs to only you.* “…” * You: A different life from Albedo’s. Maybe even a better one!* “…” *You: What do you think, Hyde?* “Hyde, huh…”
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ARATAKI ITTO
-> Abs – “I know my abs are showing but do you really have to call me abs?” *You: Can I touch them, though?* “Sure! You won’t find abs as beautiful as this, [your name]. I’m giving you a special privilege to touch them just once.”
-> Bear/Cuddly Bear/Teddy Bear - “Whoa, whoa, whoa! Those aint cool names! Okay, maybe Bear is okay but the rest are just naaah! I’m a gangster. You can’t call me something so lame. I mean, could you imagine a delinquent named Cuddly Bear or Teddy Bear?? Wait. On second thought, it doesn’t sound so bad after all. Huh… Uh-huh… Hmn… Nah. Never mind. So, any other names you wanna call me?”
-> Champ - “Champ? I don’t want to boast or anything but we already know I’m a champion. Sounds cool but nah.”
-> Geoni/Geovanni - “Yeah, baby! Now that’s what I call a real cool name! Geoni. Awesome! I like it! Fitting for the one and oni Arataki numero uno Itto! I’m gonna tell the gang to start calling me Geoni from now on. Thanks, [your name]!” *hopefully he gets the idea why you decided to call him Geoni/Geovanni*
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BAIZHU
-> Abs – “Abs?” *You: Abs.* *Baizhu looks at his abdomen* “Abs?” *You: Abs.*
-> Cocomilk Dispenser - “Why do you keep calling me Cocomilk dispenser?” *Qiqi picks up the nickname and calls Baizhu Cocomilk Dispenser* “Ah.”
-> Huang/Swindler/Won - “Haha. Swindler is a strong word, isn't it?” *Changsheng: I don’t know. It sounds good to me.* *You: Is Huang or Won okay?* “Only if you tell me why you want to call me those.” *you explain about Huang/Won of Story of Seasons/Harvest Moon* “I am not a swindler.” * You: How about borderline swindler? … Semi-swindler? … Swin? Dler? Indl?*
-> Plantito - “I don't know what it means but I'm guessing it has something to do with plants?” *you explain platito means a person who loves (to take care of) plants* “Ah, I see. I was right! 😊! I am a doctor after all, so it’s only natural for me to love plants…especially if they are useful.”
-> Sakata Kintoki – “You know, this nickname-branding of yours is going to cost you. How does five million Mora sound?” *You: Fine! I won’t call you any more names. Can you at least say, “Bear howling! Golden drive!!” 😎 With the growl and all?*
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BENNETT
-> Best Boy – “Best boy?? W – why am I a best boy?? No, sorry! I’m not mad or anything. I’m really just surprised. And happy! Why would you call me best boy?” *You: Because of your Fantastic Voyage.*
-> Cracked Mirror/No-leaf Clover/Spilled Salt/Unlucky Cat – “Sigh… I know my luck is terrible but I don’t think I deserve these horrible nicknames…🥺😢” * You: Sorry, Bennett! I take everything back!*
-> Cutie – “Y – you think I’m a cutie?! S – seriously??! Ah – oh, sorry. Again, I’m not mad. It’s just no one has ever called me cute before. Uhm… Thank you. 😀” *You: You’re welcome, cutie patootie.* “E – ehehe… 😊!”
-> Passionate Adventurer – “Wow! I like the sound of it! Thank you!” *You: It suits you well, doesn’t it? 😁*
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CHILDE
-> All-purpose Cleaner - “Huh? Haha! That's a long alias compared to Childe, isn't it?” *you explain about Ajax All-purpose Detergent/Cleaner* “🤔… Huh... So you know my real name... This is interesting. I wonder how did you know about my real name? Are you spying on me so you could kill me?” *you just say you learned his name somewhere and you call him all-purpose cleaner because he is good at killing, like how Ajax kills 99.9% of germs* “You haven't answered how you got my real name, though.” *You: Look, Ajax. All you need to know is I scoured it for our marriage contract. If I wanted to kill you, we wouldn’t be having this conversation now, would we?*
-> Onii-chan/Big brother - “Haha! I do give a big brother vibe, don't I? That's because I came from a big family and I do have younger siblings too!” *proceeds to getting behind-the-scenes information about Childe's family*
-> Blue/Gary Oak – “Who’s Gary Oak? And Blue… Is it because of my blue eyes?” *You: That. And-* *you explain that his pose reminds you of someone named Blue/Gary Oak (Pokemon 1st Gen battle sprite)* “Huh... Who exactly is he and where is he from?” *You: Wait!! Are you jealous??*
-> Daddy/Hydro Daddy – “Come on. I can’t be your daddy if you can’t be my sugarbaby. So how about it? Be my sugarbaby?” *You: Lol! Daddy, wanna be your sugarbaby~! 😍! … 😳! Wait – do you even know what sugarbaby means?* *Childe smiles at you because apparently you already mentioned the word sugarbaby way back*
-> Mister Worldwide – “Mister Worldwide?” *you decided to go against explaining about his banners/talent mats/etc.; instead you explain that he goes around Teyvat because of his job as Fatui* “That's true, I do travel a lot, yeah. Do you want to come with me next time, comrade?” *You: OMG! Does that mean a date?!*
-> Turtlelinnie - “Aw~ that's actually a pretty cute alias!” *you explain that you call him turtle because he can't keep up with you during spar sessions or fights* “Heh! Just you wait, comrade! I'm going to defeat you then I'll call you Turtlelinnie or Slowpokie.” *You: You giving me a nickname?? Can I lose on purpose?*
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CHONGYUN
-> Chong-Chong/Chonkie/Chungus – “Those are…cute nicknames, don’t you think?” *You: You don’t like it, Chong-Chong?* “It’s okay. Sorry, it’s just…embarrassing. Ah, ahem!” *Chongyun skittishly takes out his ice-cream and eats it* *You: Maybe I should let Xingqiu, Hu Tao, and the others in on your cute new aliases.* “No! Please, no!”
-> Jack Frost – “Ah. I don’t mind. Although where did you get the name Jack Frost?” *you talk about Jack Frost* *You: He’s a pretty handsome guy and his abilities are sort of like yours! Except he’s not as strong as you. Because, you know…you wield a broad sword. Meanwhile, he uses a staff.* “Oh. Okay. He sounds like an interesting guy. Now that I know about him, he won’t disappear, right?” *You: Yeah… But it’s not enough to just know him. You have to believe in him too.*
-> Mister Ice-cream Man – “That’s a long nickname, though. Wouldn’t it be better to just call me Chongyun?” *You: Fine. Let’s give you a short name. Hmn… How about… Baskin-Robbins? Ben & Jerry’s? Binggrae? Cold Stone? Haagen-Dazs? Koibito’s? Meiji? Nestle? Peters? %* “Huh???”
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DILUC
-> Batman – “Do I look like a bat to you?” *You: No. Hehe…* *in a hushed tone, you explain who Batman is* *Diluc is surprised you know what he does as Darknight Hero* *You: If it makes you uncomfortable, Imma skip to the next alias.*
-> Daddy/Pyro Daddy – “Sigh... Could you please not call me that?” *You: What're you gonna do if I keep calling you Pyro Daddy? Burn me to a crisp, Daddy?* “🙄… (Control yourself, Diluc. Control yourself.)”
-> Diwuc – “Sounds like something a child would say... I'd rather be called by my name properly but in your case, Diwuc is fine.” *You: Yay, Diwuc 🤩😍!* “You had your fun. No more nicknames, [your name].” *You: No! I’m on a roll, Diwuc!*
-> Master❤ – “Why does it sound odd when you call me master?” *You: What's the matter, Master❤? Is there anything I can do to please you, Master❤?* “Yes. For starters, stop calling me master.”
-> Wookie/Wuc/Wuckie - “🙄...” *You: What? You said I can call you Diwuc! It's some sort of a nickname for a nickname.* “Stop branding me weird names, otherwise the townsfolk might pick it up.” *Venti: Master Wookie, one Dandelion Wine, please!* *Kaeya: One Death After Noon for me, Master Wuc.* *you, Kaeya, and Venti grin slyly at Diluc* “Sigh……😑! I hope you two get a weird nickname from [your name] too.” *You: On it, Master Wuckie!*
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GOROU
-> Abs – “Eh?” *You: Yes, Abs. Can I touch them, though?* “You – you want to touch my abdomen…?” *You: Yes. Are they sensitive?* “U – uhm… Sort…of…?” *Gorou turns around to search for Kokomi’s directives about the situation he’s in* *you hug Gorou from behind, sliding your hands on his sides to his abdomen* “Eeeeh?! 😖⁉”
-> Brownie – “Because of my hair colour?” *You: Yeah. It’s simpler to name our pets based on their color.* “I’m not a pet.” *You: But can I pet you, though?* “No.”
-> Doge/Geodog/Geodoge – “Eh…” *Gorou is not used to people directly calling him a dog*
-> Good Boy – “Ahem! Please don’t call me that in front of the troops.” *without warning, you pet his head and scratch his ears* “I – I – I – yes…! 🐶” *You: Who’s a good boy?* “I – I am~! To the left, please. To the – yeah, that hits the spot! ❤”
-> Miss Hina – “😱😱😱⁉ W – w – w – why would you call me M – Miss Hina?” *Gorou croaks* *You: Hehehe~ No reason.*
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KAEYA
-> Captain Tiddy/Delicious – “My oh my. How vulgar of you, [your name]. I noticed you’ve been peeking at my chest and I let it slide. But to think you would actually call me Captain Tiddy or Delicious? Tsk, tsk, tsk… That’s going too far, don’t you think?” *You: Kaeya, I can’t help but look! Your tiddies are just there! Plus they’re so attractive to look at!* “So are you, but I don’t call you weird names, no? Or do you want me to call you attractive or gorgeous?” *Venti: Smooth!* *Diluc: 🙄* *You: Huh? 😳?*
-> Daddy/Cryo Daddy – “Ah, I think I heard you call Diluc Pyro Daddy. Do you still call him that?” *You: Sometimes. He prefers to be called Diwuc so that’s what I usually use.* “And what other names did you want to call him?” *You: Well, there’s %* *wait…did Kaeya just change the topic??? Bamboozled! 🤯*
-> Kaeyanriah – “Ho…? That’s an odd alias. What made you think of that nickname?” *You: Because –* *Kaeya observes you with a piercing gaze* *You: U – uhm – uhm…! Your name sounds…like…Khaenri’ah…* *Kaeya smiles at you* “Oh, I see. 🙂” *You: Scary…* “Ahaha…! Am I?”
-> Prince – “Hmn…” *You: No reason other than everyone thinks you’re prince charming!* “Do you think so too, [your name]?” *You: Well… Yeah.* “Haha~ That’s good to know. 😉”
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KAMISATO AYATO
-> Daddy/Hydro Daddy – “Oya? That’s not a good alias to use, especially in public.” *You: So, it’s okay to use in private quarters, right? Like maybe when we’re alone in your office…? Or in your room…? 😏* “Or perhaps in your room.” *You: GASP!* “–should I decide to visit you, of course.” *You: Y – you…! Take responsibility of my beating heart!*
-> Kamacho – “Kamacho?” *You: Hai. Kamatte choudai. 😟… You’re always busy so whenever I want your attention, I’ll call you Kamacho.* “Well, you certainly have my attention now, [your name].”
-> Milk Tea Buddy – “I assume you like milk tea as well. Unfortunately, I do not have the leisure of enjoying milk tea with you today.” *You: I’ll tell Thoma you asked him to buy you two bobas so we can drink together.* “Hehe. Go ahead. Oh, and make sure Thoma buys a boba with this recipe for himself. I’m sure he misses the taste.”
-> Scientist – “Oya?” *shows a wide variety of ingredients* *You: Mister Scientist, I know you’re busy but… Wanna feed Thoma? You choose the ingredients; I cook for you. How does that sound?* “Ahaha~ a wonderful idea! I should really let Thoma know I appreciate his hard work. Alright, let’s give him–” *you and Ayato never saw Thoma after he ate the love-filled dish*
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RAZOR
-> Awoo/Woo – “Ah? That’s not how to howl. I’ll teach you.” *Razor teaches you how to howl* *give free nickname, receive howl*
-> Wolfboy – “Yes. I am wolfboy.” *You: Yes. Wolfboy. Good wolfboy.* *you pat Razor’s head*
-> Zero – “Zero?” *You: Yup. You remind me of someone named Zero Zephyrum. Long gray hair. Broad sword.* “Okay.”
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SCARAMOUCHE
-> Daddy/Electro Daddy – “Hmph! Insolent! You have no respect. Do you think you can casually call me any nickname that pleases you?” *You: Why not? It’s not like you’re life threatening or something – ahh!* *you evade Scaramouche’s attacks* *You: See? Not life threatening at all. Daddy, please be gentler with me.*
-> Moosh/Mouche-shroom/Shroom - “You're really picking a fight, huh??” *You: Aw... Is Mouche-shroom mad?*
-> Mounche-kin (as in incorporating munchkin to mouche) - “You aren't even that tall!”
-> Scary-mouche (when Scara is mad) - “Call me that one more time and I will kill you!” *You: Since you asked nicely... Okay, Scarymouche.*
-> Sushi - “Can’t your brain think of anything but food??” *you explain that you decided to call him Sushi because (from Kunikuzushi) he is bite-sized like a sushi* “Just die already!!”
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SHIKANOIN HEIZOU
-> Blue – “Blue?” *You: Blue’s Clues.* “O…kay…?”
-> Archie/Conan Edogawa/Doctor/Scooby Doo/Sherlock Holmes/Shinichi Kudo – “Those are entirely different names you’re giving me. Why are you calling me these names?” *You: It’s a new mystery, Scooby!* “Oh! It’s because they’re all detectives too, isn’t it?” *You: Damn, too elementary for you. Could you try saying, “You can’t hide the truth from me?”*
-> Jin Kaien – “Alright. Now who’s this Jin Kaien?” *You: Hmm… Meh. Your appearance just reminds me of him. And your fighting style……*
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THOMA
-> Househusband/Male Housewife – “Mind you that cleaning and household chores are very important too! They’re no simple task and I do them proudly everyday.” *You: Which is why you’re a fitting househusband, Thoma. I bet your spouse will be very lucky to marry you.* “Relax. I’m not planning on settling down soon. So you have to wait before calling me househusband or male housewife.” *You: As in… My househusband or male housewife?! 😍❤*
-> Pyro Daddy Number Two – “Who’s Pyro Daddy Number One?” *You: Do you want to be my number one?*
-> Thomato – “Hahaha! Let me guess: It’s because of my Pyro Vision, isn’t it? Or because I love to cook? Or you really just like tomatoes?” *You: All of those. Also–* *you explain that you sometimes ship him with Ayato thus Thoma-to* “Huh?! Why would you link us together in a romantic way? We’re both guys, [your name].” *Ayato: Why is there a commotion?* *You: I told Thoma I’d call him Thomato because I link you two together. He doesn’t like it at all.* *Ayato: Oya? You don’t want to be linked to me, Thoma?* “My Lord, it’s not that I dislike it. It’s just that [your name] is linking me to you in a romantic way.” *Ayato: And do you think being romantically involved with me is unlikeable?* “N – no, of course not, My Lord! 😳! I mean…!” *Defeated Thoma looks at smiling Ayato and you* “You two are ganging up on mee.” *You: Fine! If you don’t like it then Thoma-to is now Thoma-tto for Thoma and Itto!*
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VENTI
-> Catnip – *You: I’m gonna call you Catnip cuz I just know cats love you.* *you see cats approaching from afar but you don’t tell Venti* “No! 😡! Anything but that! Ugh! Just the mere mention of their name triggers my allergies. IT must not be named. From now on, IT is a forbidden word. But I can’t do that because I’d be trampling over the people’s freedom of speech. Sigh! [your name], allergies are no joke! I kid you not! My allergies are so bad that I – ah – ah – ah – achoo! Achoo!! Achoo!!! ACHOO!!!” *You: Oh, crap, you weren’t kidding, huh??* *Venti clearly looks like he’s dying* *You: CRAP, I DON’T WANT TO BE A MURDERER! SHOO, CATS! SHOO!* *Panik* *you see Huffman approaching to investigate the ruckus* *You: QUICK, MISTER HUFFMAN! HELP ME SHOO THESE CATS AWAY NOW!! THE BARD IS DYING!!!* “AUGBLAKVG!! (Wheeze) 😭😭😭!!!”
-> Divine Fingers/Golden Fingers – *smiles slyly at Venti* *You: I bet you’re good with your fingers, Venti. 😏* “Ehe! Do you want to find out?” *You: Yeah. Can you use your skilled fingers for me please, Mister Divine Fingers? Oh~ I bet this experience is going to be the best. ♥* *Diluc: Not inside my bar. Out. Now.* *You: What?! Why?! I just wanted him to play the lyre. He’s a bard so it’s only natural that he’s good with his fingers, right~?* “I agree~! I wonder why Master Wookie is so worked up?” *Kaeya: You two would have to forgive him. He’s just stressing over work. Right, Master Wuc?* *You: Aw… Poor Master Wuckie.*
-> Garden Gnome – “Eh? Eh?? Garden Gnome?! What did I do to deserve that nickname?” *You: I just picked it up and it’s actually pretty cute.* *Diluc is smiling to himself*
-> Lord Barbatos – “Ooh! When, where and how did you decide to call me Lord Barbatos? I wanna know~” *You: You’re not really being subtle about your identity as the Archon, right?* “Eh~?” *You: Don’t “Eh” me!* “Eh ~ but not everyone is aware I’m the Anemo Archon.” *You: Yes, and I am part of the population that knows. So just drink your Dandelion Wine. Another glass for the bard – on me, please.* “Ehe~ Okay! If you say so~”
-> Balladeer Number Two – *drunk Venti downing his 48th drink* “Eeeehhh??? Who took my spot as the Number One Balladeer????” *You: Someone from the Fatui–* “FATUI?! Hic! Can’t believe they took my spot. That’s my spot! Hic! They took everything…! They even took my…Zzz…”
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XIAO
-> An-emo Adeptus – “An…emo…?” *you explain what an emo is* *Xiao clicks his tongue and teleports out* *You: Sorry, Xiao! That was mean of me!*
-> Anemo Baby/Munchkin/Smol – *Xiao glares at you in disbelief* *You: Smol and cute Xiao. Please do the barrel test for me.* “Sigh… Why are we having this conversation again…?” *Exasperated Xiao takes another bite of his Almond Tofu*
-> Cat/Mew – “I don’t even want to know why you associate me with cats.” *You: It’s better than Pss-Pss-Pss, right?* *Xiao scoffs and teleports away* *You: Hahahaha! I’ll leave another Almond Tofu for you as peace offering.*
-> Kuze – “…” *you talk about how the Xiao’s karmic debt reminded you of Tattooed Priestess’ marks* *You: So, yeah. That’s who Reika Kuze is. I hope you get to be happy too.* “Mmh…” *Xiao ponders the idea*
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XINGQIU
-> Bookworm – *Xingqiu doesn’t even react and just reads his book*
-> Chinchou – “Chinchou… Chinchou… I like it.” *You: And you’ll love it more because Chinchous are water-based creatures that also have electro abilities. They do tingle slightly because of this. Anyway, imagine having both hydro and electro abilities? They’re sort of a good combo for pranks, right?* “Ah, my liege! These creatures sound fascinating! I wish to learn more. But I have never read about them in any books. Would you tell me more?” *You: Sure~*
-> Femboy/Trap – “My liege, surely you could tell I am a boy?” *You: Yeah. Nah. At first glance I thought you were a girl. I swear at first I thought you were Chongyun’s girlfriend.* “Chongyun’s girlfriend…” *You: Yeah. … Your face… You wanna prank him or something?*
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ZHONGLI
-> Daddy/Geo Daddy – “I deem nothing wrong with it. It is true. My age may certainly be around your father’s.” *You: Hehe~ So… I can keep calling you Daddy or Geo Daddy, right?* “If it pleases you, so be it.” *You: Okay, daddy~* *Zhongli keeps in mind to ask Childe what it means to be called Daddy or Geo Daddy*
-> Dong/Dong-li/Double Dong – “What is a dong?” *You: It’s a–…* *are you sure you want to teach Zhongli what dong means?* *You: You know… That resonating sound when you ring a big bell. Ding-dong…! That.* “Oh? Is there a reason why you chose that specific word?” *You: Because of your pillars! Your pillars resonate Geo energies, right? That!* *Zhongli adds another question to Childe*
-> Hatter – “Odd. I do not own nor wear a hat.” *You: Loves tea. Dressed in stylish clothing. Gentlemanly. Less the madness. Yep, definitely Hatter.* “I see. So this Hatter is someone whom you know and is similar to me. Perhaps if we met, we could both enjoy a cup of tea.”
-> Morax/Rex Lapis – “Hmn…?” *Zhongli watches you in a calculative manner* *You: Fine. I know you want to be human. I won’t call you by your Archon titles whatsoever.* “From whom did you learn I am the Geo Archon?” *Zhongli is serious* *You: Let’s discuss what could be exchanged for your desired answers.* *be prepared – you’re dealing with the god of contracts here!*
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My personal favourite entries are Baizhu, Childe, Diluc, and Venti.
To whoever read this, thank you for your time. Here, have some chips. 🍟
Stay cheery, people!
Links : Masterlist
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