#AND I KEEP BUYIN SHIT FOR LYLE AND I KNOW I SHOULD CALM DOWN WITH THAT BUT HERE I AM SPOILING THE SHIT OUT OF THEM AS ALWAYS | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dammitjameskirk · 7 years ago

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arrrrgh i feel like i have no money and i still need to get a bunch of holiday gifts for so many people... i technically get paid tonight but like. this is my last pay day til after the holidays basically and im stressed bc i cant save money for SQUAT like this and i hate capitalism and holidays. i love spoiling my friends BUT AT WHAT COST

#litter box #the cost of my bank accnt thats what #i should have damn near close to 5k at this point and im STILL barely above 3k like im MAD AS HELL abt my spenditures #its mostly like. i need to be paid back by people ive lent to but theres no way any of them have the agency yet #like my paybacks should be somewhere in the 900-1k range altogether? at least definitely after tomorrow when i loan another 200$ but like. F #FUCK i cant keep doing this?? like im so stressed i hate this i hate this i hate this i also got a shift cancelled tonight due to inclement #weather so like it wasnt a LOT of money but still i couldve used another 40$ :'(#im also mad bc i forgot how much money ive loaned out now and i was originally keeping track with a notebook paper but i lost it #so now im basically going off of my memory?? which is shitty?????#and also i know my mom owes me 70$ from christmas gift purchasing with my card but like. i cant ask for that bc she doesnt fckin have it #i mean i know i lent like. 600 dollars so far as of two weeks ago but it ALSO mightve been 800 dollars by that point I DONT REMEMBER #and i dont want to overexpect repayments ykno?? so like im super mad at myself bc 200$ is a HUGE discrepency and i dont know :) :) :) :) :)#anyway i still need presents for ariel (30$ range) and james (25/30$ range) and isabelle (20$ range bc bitch im poor)#and i have to get more tangible gifts for keri bc all i have right now is like con prints and stickers so i wanna get something physically b #physically bigger so like shell appreciate all the little things more bc im getting patrick a pretty big physical item so like #sdkhgdwgjw #and i dont even know what she rly rly likes like shes so hard to find something meaningful for #and i have to finish a bunch of presents i wanted to crochet for family members like oma and auntie jeanie and my mom again #i should rly get my mom another gift too ive only gotten like three or four things #AND I KEEP BUYIN SHIT FOR LYLE AND I KNOW I SHOULD CALM DOWN WITH THAT BUT HERE I AM SPOILING THE SHIT OUT OF THEM AS ALWAYS #i just want lyle 2 love me more than anybody else gosh dang it #bright side i only have to get john a cheap coffee maker and i also got him some dino stickers so thats all i have to worry abt there #but i still have to get stickers for isaac at work and finish the holiday cards im making for the management team at amc #and i have to get a lil gift card for jacob probably like 5.82$ for biggby lmfao #and i wanna get something for connie and i still need to get something for fiona and anthony??#i have to get baby socks for the babies #im only ever gonna get them socks and maybe kids books idk #so that way even if i die i can stockpile a weird collection of socks for birthdays and christmas #thats morbid but whatever #leastways im consistent

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