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[boysborntodie]

When Dally handed a cigarette to Johnny before he took one himself. When Johnny told Dally to stop and, despite the fact Dally would never let someone get away with telling him what to do, he backs down without a word because it was Johnny, Johnny who he loves. And when Johnny calls Dally ‘gallant’ and it’s not because he blindly admires him, no Johnny knows Dally’s bad very well and will call him out, but it’s because he sees Dally’s good and believes it outweighs his bad and makes him someone worth admiring (like Cherry saying Bob deserved what had happened but there was also so much unseen good to him). And when Johnny said Dally cussed good and Dally was so proud of himself over the compliment. When Johnny says he’ll turn himself in and Dally, Dally who had built a facade of indifference and impenetrability, whose coping mechanism was to act like his past abuse meant nothing to him and he was above it, broke it all down, exposing himself, just to beg Johnny to not turn himself in, to not go through what Dally had gone through, to not lose his softness and kindness like Dally had. When Johnny, Johnny who had a firm moral compass and had set his mind to turning himself in, asked Dally if he wanted him to go back, willing to do whatever it was that Dally asked of him. When Dally, Dally who did not go in the church for those kids, Dally who had gone through life valuing self-preservation and survival over all else, went inside the church after Johnny. When Dally said they had to fight for Johnny and ran desperately to partake in the rumble because he needed to fight for Johnny. When Dally rambled about how he should’ve let Johnny become tough because at least Johnny would be alive that way (he blames himself, he should’ve done something and now Johnny is dead because of him-). When Dally came, telling Johnny that they fought in the rumble, that they won the rumble (for Johnny, he did it for Johnny) only for Johnny to say that fighting is no good. When Johnny was able to die peacefully because Dally was proud of him. When Johny’s death shattered Dally (how could the world let Johnny die, how could Johnny have gotten himself killed, how could Johnny have cared when the world didn’t care for him), Dally’s always been a ticking time bomb, self-destructive and destroying everything around him, and now his timer was up. When Johnny was the one thing Dally loved and now he was gone. When Dally pulls out an empty gun on the cops, because Dally wanted to die and Dally always got what he wanted. When Pony reads Johnny’s letter and learns that Johnny died wanting Dally to look at sunsets, to find beauty and good in a cruel world and recognise it is worth living in, that Johnny died wanting Dally to live, but he didn’t, it was to late for Dally, a boy hardened to the world, a boy broken beyond repair, a boy who lost the one person he truly loved.