#AHASF I SUPER PROMISE THIS ISNT AN SQX PITY POST. I SINCERELY MEAN IT SQX IS SO FAILGUY IT'S NOT FUNNY.

[deiscension]

I'm so entirely serious when I say SQX is perhaps one of the biggest failguys I've ever come across. Just, objectively a failgirl. Cannot be saved cannot save and never was safe girl. Girl who cries for help and then realizes she should've tried harder to help herself, should've never gotten help, and if you try to step forward and help now she won't let you. Not in any way that gives her a foot forward. You are a child and you try to take your brother some food and you trip and spill everything and the monster is back because you are the food, silly thing. And it shouldn't have been anyone but you, except it's already been everyone but you, and now you're alone and as it turns out you were the hungry monster that ate up everyone when all you wanted to do was care. And it really shouldn't be about you anymore, let it be about someone else deserving of the pity for once, yet somehow it's always about you. And of course you're scared and hurt but that's already more than you deserve to have. You love and you give and you defend and you are so deeply wrong for believing you have the right to do so freely. You pass tests with flying colors after the timer has long since gone off. It was never your place at the table so why did you eat from it, why did you feed others from it? You can hope and try and try with all you are (which is, admittedly, laughably little even if that laughably little is the richest you have ever been). But no matter what reality you inhabit you're not built to last because it never should've been you. Somehow you manage to miss the point of being fragile, of being undeserving, because still you persist and can't make yourself give up, either. #Failgirl.