#AAAAURHHHHGGHHH

[sketchboi33]

I am so unwell about the full moon ep. I need to word vomit about Stoliz for a second pls. I wrote so much

Blitzø is so self-destructive, he can't comprehend the idea that someone like Stolas could actually love him. So instead of accepting Stolas' confession, he gets upset. Assumes that he's not doing enough to keep Stolas' interest. And gets mad at him when he assumes Stolas is doing this as another way to string him along. To play his game. When this is all not true.

Stolas loves Blitzø. Truly and honestly. But he knows that a deal like the one they had was forcing obligation into their relationship, as well as being a very unfair power dynamic. That, let's be fair, Stolas did originally set up himself. He's not fully in the right. But the way that he decided to break off something that was genuinely making him happy, because he now knows it isn't fair to Blitzø, that shows real growth and character development.

And I think deep down Stolas was staying naive to Blitzø's true feelings. He wanted so badly for Blitzø to reciprocate his feelings, and when he didn't get the response he wanted, he shut down fully. He's spent so much time in his life not feeling worth love because of Stella and his father. So in order to guard himself and not let that happen again, he immediately cuts the tie. Doesn't even let Blitzø have a moment to fully comprehend what's happening.

And to make matters worse, Blitzø's lashing out, although yes aimed to hurt Stolas, was done in a way that makes Stolas seem cold and arrogant, IN ORDER FOR BLITZØ TO FEEL JUSTIFIED IN HIS SELF DEPRICATION. Which of course hurt Stolas a lot. And his line of "I think so highly of you. It hurts to hear just how little you think of me" just like.. you know.. ripped my heart out and tore it into little pieces.

Although it literally kills me. I think this break is good for them. Especially Blitzø. Stolas will get a chance to I think gain a small bit of confidence back. And just that fact that he did this at all shows immense amounts of growth. And for Blitzø I'm really hoping this allows him to realize his own feelings. And perhaps he will be able to realize his own self destructive tendencies and maybe take this as a sign to fight back against them for once. Not without some MAJOR depressive and anger induced episodes though. The mans is very very not well and this is certainly not going to help at first.

Anyways... I just needed to word vomit about this. I am obsessed with these two and I will be very very sad about this until the next episode comes out 🥲