#9 1 1 s6ep11

[divine-victory]

I’m going to add my two cents to this because I HAD SO MANY THOUGHT WHEN I WATCHED THIS LAST NIGHT and I simply cannot.

I don’t think the Buckleys were redeemed in the episode necessarily. I don’t think that’s what happened there. Because the coma episode is primarily about Buck. Buck said it in the comma world he said they don’t have to ‘make it up to him’ and that he knows they did their best and he will love them forever. Because Buck is good at doing as he preaches.

The whole dream is about Buck learning his worth beyond what other people see in him. Arguably his whole character arc is learning who he is beyond what people want from him. But in this episode Buck is fighting against his own insecurities and learned behavior. He tells Bobby how he saved him by being Buck. And that was Enough.

As you said Bobby has shaped Buck in more important ways than his parents ever did which is why he has an actual conversation with Bobby. A back and forth that makes him realize that being Buck is enough. That’s the big part. The important growth that shapes him. And from that he is able to make the choices that safe his life. He tells Chris that he can’t help him, not because he wouldn’t literally die to help Chris. But because he knows that helping Chris in this specific scenario where he isn’t real will be detrimental to Buck and it won’t help Chris. It shows that Buck is learning that helping at the cost of his own well being isn’t the right answer. He talks to his parents and tells them he loves them anyway. And they did the best they could. Not because his parents have earned his forgiveness, or because he is redeeming them. But because he deserves to forgive them. It isn’t about redeeming them. It is about allowing Buck to heal from how they hurt him. It’s Buck letting go of the hurt and that expectation of love and validation because he doesn’t need it from them anymore.

Buck can’t change how his parents behave, or treat him or how they might or might not feel about him. He has spent his entire life trying to do that and it has been painful and damaging to him. But he has grown a lot since joining the 118 and meeting his real family. The people that love him, accept him and validate him just for being Buck. So when Buck tells his dream parents, the ones in his head. The ones he created for himself that he doesn’t need them anymore. He is telling himself that his parents’ validation isn’t something he needs anymore.

He does the same to Daniel, he tells Daniel it isn’t his fault that Daniel dies and when Daniel starts fighting Buck and Buck realizes that he is fighting a version of himself. The version of him that blames him for ‘failing’ that tells him his family doesn’t care for him that he is worthless. He is fighting his own insecurities, and he wins against them. Because he has grown. Because he has true unconditional love. Because he saw Bobby take out the rosary beads.

I agree that Bobby and Athena are Buck’s parents in a way the Buckleys won’t ever be. But the thing is the Buckleys are still people Buck loves. Throughout the previous episode they parallel The Buckleys to the Hans. Chimney has a similar relationship to his Dad than Buck to his parents. Chimney realizes that he is building a family of his own and that he doesn’t want to make the same mistakes as his Dad- allowing his hurt and pride to keep him from his family. Similarly Buck learns that while he can’t go back and change how his parents treated him or saw him he can learn to accept what they can offer him now. It can be enough. Not because his parents deserve to be redeemed but because he wants a relationship with them.

When the whole Daniel thing came to light his mom told him that looking at him was a reminder of the son they lost. That raising him had been hard and she asked what he wanted them to do. Buck responded that he wanted them to love him anyway. So he won’t make the same mistake. He knows they can’t give him that unconditional, love and support a parent is supposed to. But he already has that. He has Bobby and Athena in his corner already. So he won’t ask that of them. He can love them as they are because they are trying. Maybe one day they’ll get to the point where they are good parents, maybe they will always be too loss in their grief to reach that but Buck is going to love them anyway. Because that’s what he has always wanted from other people. Because that’s what Bobby has taught him. That sometimes if you love people through their bad they will get better on their own. Because he has.

Now me? Personally? I would have put them in a home and never looked back. But Buck is a better person than me.

i think my roman empire is how it feels like the buckley parents' redemption isn't supposed to be in the whole coma storyline. buck's desire to stay in the coma world being fundamentally rooted in how there he had that classic nuclear family growing up with parents who love him implies that he still doesn't have that in the real world. at the end of the episode, he says that his family isn't in the coma world, and makes the deliberate choice to step away from this perfect family he always wanted and toward the 118 family he already has. but if we take the redemption (specifically how the show framed the simplicity of their redemption) seriously, they are actually around and buck has a great relationship with them, discounting their role in buck's coma. i'm not saying the buckleys being around completely contradicts what buck went through and realized in the coma i actually really love the arc! family is much more nuanced than there/not there so buck's desire to have parents who always showed their love for him rather than parents who showed up after 29 years, even if they are trying now, does actually make a lot of sense! but the weight the episode puts on how the buckleys are magically fixed and buck instantly brings them back into his life.

in the thematic core of the episode as well as the show as a whole, bobby (and athena too) has a much larger role than the buckleys in shaping buck, helping him find the way out, showing him that he's wanted. buck realizes his own importance through his relationship with bobby, and how even when they fought he still cared about him and his actions were able to change both of their lives for the better. it's not simple, it's not always positive, but there's always this unconditional aspect that they keep fighting back to. and yet the episode still ends with the buckleys back in buck's life, without much of a fight to reach a common ground of conversation. yeah, they may not have ever been around before but now they're offering to redecorate his house 👍 all's good here problem solved

it's a truly fascinating contrast between bobby and buck's hard-fought growth and connection over the course of the series culminating in this ep, and the buckleys' past issues with buck largely ignored in favor of easy, clean resolution because "well, they're trying this time". one of these feels deeply connected to the themes of the show and the progression of its characters, and the other sticks out from the show's narrative like a sore thumb.

tldr fuck the buckley parents all my homies hate the buckley parents happy belated father's day bobby nash <3