#33rd space antonio

[franceanon]

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[truc0nfessionz]

i feel really depressed today

i feel emotional. drained. empty. craving.

it's weird. i have the most perfect life, the life i always dreamed about, but somedays like today i'm really sad.

today, i feel lonely. my girlfriend is in san antonio today (where she lives) and the absence without her seems massive.

yesterday, we got in a disagreement unexpectedly.

and for those 2 reasons, i can't help but wonder if i'm putting too much into this.

i can't help but wonder if maybe i should keep more to myself.

i used to be a person with hobbies. a girl with goals, a vision, things to do.

and suddenly, i'm feeling like a lady in waiting.

when she's here, i'm great. i'm 1000%. i'm on my shit. but when she's gone, it's really hard to bear.

i feel empty. i feel lonely. i feel sad.

all i want is to be with her, and i feel like that might not be a good thing.

am i losing who i am?

what about me? the things i want, crave, and dream of?

i need to get back to being who i am - being a creative, being a nurturer, being a pioneer. i want to feel deeply connected to my being, instead of what's outside of it.

also, i can't help but feel pain about the fact that avia is continuously trying to reach out to me to speak. honestly, there's nothing that she could say that would posses me to hear her out. I completely understand that she was in a bad state of mind when she attacked me, and also, i'm not willing to put myself back into that situation when i don't think she's in a better state of mind now. honestly, i don't care whether she is or not.

she's basically lauren. she won't take my silence as an answer and wants to continuously push on other avenues to get me to engage in some way.

but for avia specifically, i will adamantly decline to participate, whether she's healed or not. the truth is, i did NOTHING but help this person. so i don't have space for them to tell me how 'terrible' it was to have been given a fucking shot in your career that you didn't deserve. i'm good. she can tell that to her therapist.

i am grateful to the universe for always removing the toxic people from around me that don't need to be there. as much as i want to scream obscenities about avia and wish her unwell, i'll let the universe take care of that for me. the truth is, i hope she gets exactly what she deserves. i hope that the energy she's spent pursuing and harassing me is returned to her in the way that the universe determines appropriate. and most of all, like everyone else who's ever harmed me, i hope she learns. i hope she figures out that when you spread hate in this world you will always lose. and i hope she relearns that lesson as many times as necessary for her journey.

i'm pained that even though i do my damndest to only give pure energy - to only give love and light - that i still find myself being taken advantage of and attacked by others. that hurts my soul because i know i don't deserve this. i wasted precious energy on these people, and they tried to drag me down to hell.

but i am thankful for the lessons i've learned on them. i don't owe anyone a second chance, a third chance, or a 33rd chance (in lauren's case). i determine when you've had enough of my energy, and for these two narcissistic, sociopathic drama queens - truly, i've given enough.

the energy these people contribute is evil. it's out of flow with the universe and it's energy i don't have time to absorb or entertain. i wish them the best, and i wish to never see or interact with them in any way again.

i also manifest purpose. i seek the signs of guidance from the universe. i wonder deeply if i'm on the right path, and maintain faith that if i weren't, i would feel it and i would know.

yesterday, ivy and i disagreed about threesomes. honestly, i was instantly defensive because it felt like B all over again. this is an experience i've never in my life had, and as i said out loud yesterday, agreeing to be with ivy means that i know i will never have it.

i told her i'm okay with that. and i'm fairly certain that it's true.

but do i wonder if someday i'll wonder? i really do. i wonder that a lot.

i understand ivy's perspective fully - she only wants me to want her, and i do. but i wonder if someday i may want to explore something new, and she is adamantly against that occurring.

and on the other hand, i'm also irritated by ivy's sudden interest in hanging out with her classmates - half of which (LITERALLY HALF) have a fucking crush on her. now they're doing lunches and the movies and shit. like, oh sorry, i didn't realize that suddenly these random 19 year old girls were so important that you're considering reducing your time with me to hang out with them....

yeah, not sure if i'm cool with that.

and finally, my sister really irked the shit out of me this weekend. she agreed to watch my dog, then proceeded to NOT pick up my dog's food and instead feed her some random shit all weekend. which is fine, except for the fact that I AM THE ONE who would have to deal with the dog having an upset stomach after the fact.

literally, she would never do that to anyone else's dog, and i feel majorly disrespected that she would pull that with mine.

i feel fucking taken advantage of on all of these fronts. i know i don't deserve any of this energy, and i want to fight against the slightest notion that i'll accept any of it.

and so, while i'll always carry a torch of light, love and growth - i won't be fucked with this year. i will adamantly decline to participate in spaces that don't have my best interest at heart. and i can't take anything less than that, because i don't deserve it.

weirdly, i had flashbacks about aziza today. i guess this is around the time where our situationship was pretty intense last year. i haven't envisioned her mind so clearly in my face in such a long time. it almost, for a moment, made me miss her.

and while our ending was bullshit, i truly and sincerely hope she's doing well. i hope she learned something from our encounter. somedays, i still wonder about the lesson i learned from her. but i don't dwell on whether or not i should have done so. that would be counterproductive.

but damn, all these little pains in the past few years sometimes feel like they compound down on me at once. how could so many people look at my face, feel my energy and proceed to give me their worst? what did i do in each encounter to deserve this treatment?

if i'm honest, that shit with aziza and with shawn hurt a lot. and obviously, i still have massive pain over B. massive, massive, massive.

i know that the best revenge you can possibly give is to have a fantastic life without someone, but damn, sometimes i want something more satisfying than that.

sometimes, i want to hurt these people the way they hurt me. but i know in my heart it wouldn't make me feel better. i'm not like them, and that's my gift. their curse is that they'll always be themselves, with this energy to give.

please lord and universe, give peace to my heart. show me the signs of where i should be. and support my success in each endeavor i undertake.

[hakesbrother]

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[nbatrades]

76ers Land Arnett Moultrie in Draft Night Deal with Miami Heat

On June 29th, 2012, the Philadelphia 76ers traded the draft rights of Justin Hamilton, a 2015 second round draft pick (Jordan Mickey) and a 2016 second round draft pick (Deyonta Davis) to the Miami Heat for the draft rights to Arnett Moultrie.

*Trade originally framed as Heat trading draft rights of Moultrie to the 76ers for draft rights of Hamilton and a 2013-2015 lottery protected first round pick. If pick was not conveyed in ‘13, ‘14 or ‘15 drafts, pick would convert into two second round picks in ‘15 and ‘16. 

The Miami Heat were 2012 NBA Champions with a loaded cap sheet. With much of their team salary devoted to stars LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh, the team was a in the luxury tax. That meant Miami would be penalized financially for every dollar that they went over the tax. 

The Heat held a first round pick (27th overall) in the 2012 NBA Draft and instead of adding an incoming rookie with a guaranteed contract, the team traded the pick to the Philadelphia 76ers for a second rounder (45th overall) in the draft and a future first round pick that was lottery protected from 2013-15.

The Heat drafted Arnett Moultrie for Philadelphia with the 27th selection and dealt him to the 76ers soon after. Standing 6′11″, Moultrie was an intriguing prospect from Mississippi State. Armed with a 38-inch vertical leap, Moultrie was an athletic big that could finish well at the rim. He joined a Sixers team loaded with athletic players like Andre Iguodala, Thaddeus Young and Jrue Holiday.

The Sixers had been enamored with Moultrie and almost picked him 15th in the draft, but prioritized St. John’s wing Maurice Harkless first. After Moultrie fell down in the draft, Philly swooped in to take Moultrie late in the first round.

Despite his intriguing athleticism, there was some caution around drafting Moultrie due to character issues. After the draft, Moultrie was unable to participate in 2012 Summer League in Orlando due to a left ankle sprain suffered in a predraft workout. 

The Sixers made a splash in the offseason. They dealt Iguodala to the Denver Nuggets, and 2011 and 2012 draft picks Nikola Vucevic and Maurice Harkless respectively in a four-team trade that netted them All-Star Andrew Bynum. 

Moultrie was expected to be eased into a backup role, playing behind the newly-acquired Bynum, Thaddeus Young, Spencer Hawes and LaVoy Allen in Philly’s frontcourt. The Sixers had hope for regular season success with the addition of Bynum, but their hopes would be severely damaged by a knee injury to Bynum that caused him to miss the entire season.

Without Bynum, the team began the season 10-6, but couldn’t sustain their early success. A season-ending knee injury to starting shooting guard Jason Richardson also hurt as the Sixers went 24-24 the rest of the season to finish 34-48.

Moultrie spent time in the D-League where he played for the Sioux Falls Skyforce and averaged 9.7 PPG, 6.1 RPG, 1.6 APG and 0.6 SPG in nine games and 26.3 MPG. He finished his rookie season playing limited minutes. Overall, Moultrie amassed 3.7 PPG and 3.1 RPG in 47 contests and 11.5 MPG.

After the Bynum situation unraveled, coach Doug Collins decided to resign. Club president Rod Thorn decided to retire and general manager Tony DiLeo was let go. That Sixers triumvirate ended abruptly while Philadelphia would enter the “Trust The Process” era. Led by new team president and general manager Sam Hinkie, the 76ers opted to trade All-Star Jrue Holiday and tank their way to the bottom of the NBA. Hinkie brought in his own coach, hiring San Antonio Spurs assistant Brett Brown. 

Philly dealt Holiday to the New Orleans Pelicans for the draft rights to center Nerlens Noel. The team also drafted point guard Michael Carter-Williams in the 2013 NBA Draft. 

The Sixers let the injured Bynum and bench players Dorell Wright and Nick Young walk in free agency. In 2013 Summer League, Moultrie was given a chance to play. He appeared in five games and amassed 12.2 PPG, 7.4 RPG, 0.6 APG and 0.6 SPG in 28.2 MPG.

Moultrie underwent left ankle surgery in late September of 2013. The injury caused him to miss a huge portion of the 2013-14 season. When he returned, he played sparingly, as Sixers head coach Brown cited his lack of conditioning and being overweight as reasons not to play him. On top of that, Moultrie was suspended five games by the NBA for violating the league’s drug policy. A five-game suspension indicated that Moultrie had tested positive for marijuana for the third time.

Due to his struggles getting in shape, Moultrie spent some time with Sixers D-League affiliate, the Delaware 87ers. Moultrie played in 10 games, managing 10.5 PPG, 4.5 RPG, 1.6 APG and 1.0 SPG.

During the 2013-14 season, the Sixers experienced the brief highlight of winning their first three games. That would be the team’s peak, as the Sixers finished second worst in the NBA at 19-63. Philadelphia continued to sell off key pieces, trading mainstays Evan Turner and Spencer Hawes at midseason in separate deals. In his second season, Moultrie finished with 12 games played, 3.0 PPG, 2.9 RPG, 0.7 SPG and 15.6 MPG.

In the 2014 offseason, the Sixers had the third pick in the draft, and selected center Joel Embiid from Kansas. They also acquired the 12th pick Dario Saric. The team continued to get rid of key players, dealing forward Thaddeus Young to the Minnesota Timberwolves in the three-team trade that saw Kevin Love join the Cleveland Cavaliers.

Coming into his third year, Moultrie dedicated himself, losing 10 pounds and improving his conditioning. In preseason, Moultrie showed modest signs of improvement, posting 10.2 PPG on 46% from the field and 5.7 RPG in six preseason games and 23.3 MPG. The slight momentum Moultrie built was all for naught. The big man was traded by the 76ers to the New York Knicks for Travis Outlaw, the rights to swap second round picks in 2018, and a 2019 second rounder. 

Overall, Moultrie appeared in 59 career games with the Sixers, compiling 3.6 PPG and 3.1 RPG. The big man shot 55% from the field and 67% from the free-throw line in that time.

From Miami’s vantage point, they acquired LSU center Justin Hamilton in the trade with the 76ers for multiple reasons. As a second round draft pick, Hamilton was an ideal player for the Heat to draft. 

He was a floor spacing big man who could make midrange jumpers with the potential to expand his game outside of the three-point line. That would be ideal to open up driving lanes for James and Wade. Also, Miami acquired a future lottery protected first round pick that could be used as an asset in a trade.

Hamilton played in 2012 Summer League for Miami, but since he had no guaranteed contract, the Heat stashed him overseas. Hamilton played professionally for Cibona Zagreb of the Croatian League and BK VEF Rīga in Latvia during the 2012-13 season. 

Hamilton signed a training camp deal with the Heat in October of 2013. He played in five preseason games before being waived by the Heat in 2013 training camp. Hamilton went to the NBA's Developmental League where he played for Heat affiliate the Sioux Falls Skyforce, averaging 19.2 PPG and 9.3 RPG in 37 games.

Eventually, Hamilton was signed to a 10-day contract by the Charlotte Bobcats in February of 2014. He appeared in one game for Charlotte before his contract expired. Soon after, Hamilton signed a contract for the rest of the 2013-14 season to return to the Heat.

In January of 2014, the Heat dealt the protected first rounder along with a second rounder and center Joel Anthony to the Boston Celtics in a three-team trade also involving the Golden State Warriors. 

When the Hamilton-Moultrie deal was first made, the protected first round pick was expected to convey soon after the Sixers added Andrew Bynum in a four-team deal in 2012. Expected to be a top playoff team in the East, the Sixers’ playoff hopes crumbled after Bynum sat out for the entire 2012-13 season with a knee injury.

The tanking process allowed the Sixers to keep their lottery protected pick from 2013-2015. Since the pick was never conveyed, it converted to two second rounders in the 2015 and 2016 drafts. The 2015 second rounder was used by the Boston Celtics on big man Jordan Mickey at the 33rd spot of the draft. The 2016 second rounder ended up 31st in the draft and was used on center Deyonta Davis.

Arnett Moultrie on being acquired by Philadelphia (via the Philadelphia Inquirer):

“It makes you feel good to know that they wanted me that badly. It makes you want to play for them. It’s always good to be wanted.”

On being able to play the five in addition to the four (via NBC Sports Philadelphia):

“My primary position is the four, but whatever coach Collins needs me to do, I’ll do it. I’m a winner so they need me to play the five, I’ll play the five.”

On falling in the draft:

“I wasn’t disappointed when my name wasn’t called. I figured I was going to end up in a place I needed to be to be successful. This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity so I’m just happy to be here.”

Miami Heat president of basketball operations Pat Riley on why the trade was made (via Sun Sentinel):

“We simply wanted to defer our pick and our asset to next year. The players that we had on the board were not there at the time and we felt we had a great option, in being able to get a future first from Philly, that’s lottery protected, but could be 10 picks higher than this year. We just felt with our roster that roster spots were very valuable.”

On Justin Hamilton (via the Miami Herald):

“[Hamilton is] a big body 7-footer that can go into the pipeline with our other bigs and keep developing them. There’s a possibility [of going overseas]. You want that flexibility with a second-round pick. He has quick feet, big, takes up a lot of space. Not an above the rim player. Has a nice touch from 15 feet. Smart player, played in a good program. We had him in for workouts and he had a great workout.”

Philadelphia 76ers president of basketball operations Rod Thorn on Arnett Moultrie (via the Philadelphia Inquirer):

“He’s athletic. He’s a good rebounder. He’s got a good jump shot. He should be very good for us, and we’re very happy to have him. We needed a big, and we think we got an outstanding big player.”

How the drafting of Moultrie unfolded (via Sixers.com):

“Over the course of the draft, (the potential for such a trade with the Heat) materialized. Our feeling was that (Moultrie) was one of the top-10 players in the draft and that he was the kind of player we could use on this team.”

76ers head coach Doug Collins on Moultrie (via Delaware Daily County Times):

“I talked to Arnett, and said from his standpoint I’m sure he wanted to go at 15, but selfishly, as we saw the draft unfold we started feverishly getting on the phone. I think [owner] Josh [Harris] went into hedge-fund mode, acquiring assets. It was fun to watch, to sit back and watch him, [senior vice president and assistant general manager] Tony [DiLeo], [president of basketball operations] Rod [Thorn] and get Arnett at 27, we were thrilled. We worked out six guys the one day here (at PCOM) and it took Arnett five minutes to separate himself from all five of those guys.”

On how they ended up acquiring Moultrie (via the Philadelphia Inquirer):

“We were thrilled. As the draft was unfolding, we had Maurice targeted as our No. 1 guy based on how we thought it was going to shake out. And if he had not been there, we were going to take Arnett.”

How Moultrie should feel after several teams passed on him in the draft (via NBC Sports Philadelphia):

“I told him he should have a chip on his shoulder. He was being kind, but you can’t help to be upset. When you’re a lottery talent and you go 27th, you’re going to be disappointed. But what you do is take that disappointment and fuel it.”

Image Credit:

Arnett Moultrie via USA TODAY Sports/Chris Humphreys

Justin Hamilton via Getty Images/Mitchell Leff